Mayim Bialik's Breakdown - Kelly Clarkson: Small-Town Starts, F-You Attitudes, & Combating Industry Standards

Episode Date: June 15, 2021

Kelly Clarkson, Grammy Award-winning singer and Emmy Award-winning talk show host, takes us through her mental and physical health journey after becoming one of the biggest popstars in the world. She shares how growing up in a small Texas town prepared her for global fame and how her voice has evolved over the years. Kelly and Mayim discuss treating their respective thyroid issues with eastern and western medicines and the benefits of NMN supplements. They detail their ongoing struggles with living up to industry standards, combating public opinions of their personal lives, and charting one's own path despite the opinions of others. Kelly's perspectives, affirmations, and "F-you attitude" leave Mayim inspired to tackle her own insecurities. BialikBreakdown.com YouTube.com/mayimbialik Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Coke is like candy in this industry. I've never done that. But it's so destructive and there's so many beneficial things that are healthy and natural for you. I'm picturing an after party, but I'm picturing Kelly Clarkson being like, here's some B12 supplements. I know, that's me.

Everybody's like, are you look good? I was like, man, I just had some mad. I feel so good. I take it in liquid form. You know what? NEMN is really good too with Vyratrol. But anyway, I'm just saying... Oh, that's straight out of the David Sinclair playbook right there.

I know. I didn't just read it. I took it in. It's Miami-Bi-Aleck's breakdown. She's going to break it down for you. Because, you know, she knows a thing or two. And now she's going to break it down. I'm Miami-Bi-Alegg, and welcome to my breakdown.

This is the place where we break things down so you don't have to. And today, we're breaking down the thyroid. We're breaking down divorce. We're breaking down why Mayam doesn't think she's good enough for anything, but Kelly Clarkson does. Does that sound about right? Sounds about right. That's the voice of my favorite polar bear, Jonathan Cohen.

Oh, I thought I was going to be your favorite American idol. I almost made that show. But Kelly took my spot. You could also be Mr. No-it-all if we're thinking about Kelly Clark's and themed songs. Because of you, I never stray too far from the sidewalk because you make me afraid to branch out. I need to fly away and break away. Because of you, I have this microphone. Jonathan, we're talking to Kelly Clarkson today.

It's a very, very exciting person to have on because she is famously cool, like, normal. Like, and people are like, she's not normal. She's pretty normal. She's a straight shooter. She's a straight shooter from Texas. And she, spoiler alert, she's wearing no makeup and she's in pigtails and like just came back from a jog and gives zero Fs. And had just gardened. She was gardening.

Podcast. And she's like, and she's like, she taught me a lot. I cried more than once. But not in a good way. Anyway, I think everyone's going to really enjoy hearing Kelly Clarkson talk about kind of what, how her body and mental health have reacted to her incredible life.

Also, she's so humble. Like, she's inappropriately humble. You're going to tell me people sing like that all over Texas? Maybe they do. But I can't imagine that that woman opened her mouth and people weren't like, what? I mean, when she was on American Idol, it was like, what? What is that voice? It's very, very special.

It's pretty amazing. Would you like to sing us something from Kelly Clarkson, Jonathan? You always tell me I'm tone deaf. You are. So let's not encourage me to sing. I sound like Kelly Clarkson in the shower in my own head, and that's all that matters. That is true. We also get a little peek into a new kind of therapy Jonathan's been doing.

Talk about that later in the episode. That's true. The word of the day is NMN, which MIM will tell us what it stands for. NMN stands for nicotinamide mononucleotide, which is actually, it looks like RNA. Like if you've heard of DNA, which is deoxyribonucleic, acid. The single chain version of DNA is called RNA. You may know about RNA because we've been talking a lot about MRI, messenger RNA regarding the COVID vaccine. It's an mRNA. It's the kind of genetic information that viruses have. So viruses are living things, as it were, and they don't

have DNA like we do. They have RNA. So NMN is that kind of structure. And, you know, it's a bunch of molecules, which I don't think that's the most important part of this. Like, it's a nicotinamide, it's a ribos, and it's a phosphate, which if you like organic chemistry, you're my friend. NMN is a precursor to something called NAD or NAD plus, and that's nicotinide aden dinucleotide. But what's important about NMN is when it's marketed as a supplement, which is how we will be talking about it and how some people take it. It basically encourages, in theory, the production of NAD and NADH and NAD plus. NADH just has a hydrogen group added to it. Anyway, now that you're listening again, because I'm stopping talking about organic chemistry,

this is something that's in, it's found in very large concentrations in mitochondria. No, mitochondria is the powerhouse of every cell in your body. So, you know, every cell that you have. So like your skin is the largest, you know, a collection of cells, which is, you know, an organ essentially of skin cells, but you have cells everywhere. Your whole body's made of cells. And a cell has a nucleus, which has its genetic information. But it also has all these other things going on in the cell. There's like a packaging station.

Think of like a post office. Every cell's got one. It's called the Golgi apparatus. But the mitochondria, which is one of these other things in the cell, is the powerhouse of your cell. It's what creates ATP. It's what creates the energy that fuels every process in your body. body. So having more NAD and NAD available in theory is something that companies like NMN supplements

are capitalizing on, meaning they are selling you these supplements as ways to increase your energy. And I have taken them. They can work topically for some systems it can hit like a, whoa, oh my goodness. And I kind of had an oh my goodness experience, which we'll talk about in a little bit. But many people take this as a regular supplement. So, So when you hear us talk about NMN or NADH, that's what that is. And these are kind of tend to be expensive supplements. These are, you know, often offered from L.A. or other coastal, you know, kinds of doctors as an advance in the metabolic boosting that many people can do.

It's not illegal. It's not like a narcotic. It's nothing like that. But anyway, that's what NMN is. And that's how it functions in your body. Maim, if someone who's listening doesn't know who Kelly Clarkson is, why don't you share a little bit about her? I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly. Jesus Take the Wheel? That's her too, no? It's not her.

Who is it? Who's Jesus Take the Wheel? You. Kelly Clarkson is an award, an Emmy Award winning talk show host. She is a Grammy Award winning artist. She is, it makes me a little forklem to talk about it, America's original idol. She's one of the most popular artists of this era. She has worldwide sales of more than 25 million albums. I can't even fathom that. And 40 million singles.

She's also a coach on season 20, I didn't even know that went on for 20 years, of NBC's Multi-Emmy Award-winning musical competition series, The Voice. She also is in season two of her own mulmobile. multi-em-award-winning daytime talk show. Everything she does she gets awards for, the Kelly Clarkson Show, which has already been picked up for an additional two seasons. She had me on once, just letting you know,

Kelly, I'm available for another two seasons. She recently released her critically acclaimed Grammy-nominated eighth studio album, Meaning of Life. And in 2020, she released her powerful single, I Dare You, which she recorded with five other artists in six languages. So she was the winner in two.

2002 of the inaugural season of American Idol, her singer was, A moment like this. Some people wait. Once, but, oh, I can't believe it's happening to me. I'm literally singing and Jonathan is not paying attention. That was a powerful moment, because some people do wait a lifetime for a moment like this, and they're singing and the other person is not listening. Clarkson is one of Pops top singles artists

with 17 singles boasting multi-platinum, platinum and gold certifications around the world. She's won every award that I think exists. Daytime Emmy, Grammy Awards, American Music Awards, MTV Video Music Awards, Academy of Country Music Awards, American Country Awards, Country Music Association Awards. She's also the first artist to top each of Billboard's pop adult contemporary country and dance charts. That's incredible.

She also has a talk show. I mentioned that. And if you were listening, you would have heard it. I can't right now. She also has hosted the Billboard Music Awards for the past three years. She voices the character of Moxie in Ugly Dolls and the character of Delta Dawn in Trolls World Tour. She also was the winning coach on seasons 14, 15, and 17 of The Voice. It is really an honor to welcome Kelly Clarkson.

And I promise you Jonathan will pay much more attention to her than he does to me. Let's welcome Kelly Clarkson. Break it down. Kelly Clarkson! It's so exciting to have you here. I know. I feel like we've been planning this for a year. Well, so I had the honor and privilege of appearing on your show, which was a lot of fun.

During COVID, I didn't even get to get close to you for a picture. It made me really sad. But since then, and it was, I think, you, me and Bobby Moynihan, who I had on my podcast. Yeah. You know, I'm a very large fan of yours. I've wept to your music for many years through many. The feeling is mutual. It was awesome to find out.

Well, I cannot give you music to help you through divorce, but you gave me music to help me through divorce. So thank you very much. I webbed so many times. You're a really great conversationalist. That's why I'm so excited to do that. I was like her pot literally you left the thing. I was talking to my, the Zoom or whatever, and I was like talking to my French show.

I was like, she's so cool, like so down to earth. And like really smart and witty. And it was just very, it was a nice bouquet of everything. Thank you. That's me. I'm a nice bouquet of everything. You're a nice bouquet of all of it. And it's always fun to have two celebrities talking about how awesome the others are.

That's like award shows. But I've met a lot of human beings. and you literally, you come off exactly the way you are. You are a very, like, you're a normal person to me. I am exactly what you see on TV. Right, but you have a very, you're a very, very, very famous award-winning, amazing human, but you really do have like a normal way of speaking. Yeah, no, I think they try, I don't know if they, did they do this too?

Because you were so young in the industry. I was two, I was like 19. Did they try and get you to do like the media training, like in the beginning? I'm untrainable. That's legit what the guy told my manager at the time. He was like, good luck. Because he was like, maybe you shouldn't answer it that way because then someone will ask you that. And I'm like, all right, then they ask me that.

And they're like, well, I know, but people might not want you to answer that. And I'm like, why would I not answer that? It's not like super personal. And then they're like, well, they'll misconstrue it. And I'm like, they're all misconstru everything I say. I'm from a small town. Did you just get here? Take us back to that small town, if you will.

Yes. Take us back. Tell us who you were before everyone in the universe knew who you were. What was young Kelly like? I was born in Fort Worth, Texas, and I grew up half my life, or half my childhood life. And then I moved to Burleson, which is a completely different side of the tracks. Like the two cities could not, they're 30 minutes apart, but they could not be more different. The area of Fort Worth I lived in and then Burleson.

Fort Worth, is that where the airport is? Dallas, Fort Worth. Yeah, Dallas, Fort Worth. Yeah, Dall's Fort Worth. That's what I know about that. But no, I did have a mother and father at some point. But my mom, I stuck with her. We randomly lived in Orange County for a bit around like the age of six.

And then my parents split. And then everyone went a different way. Like it was like me and my brother My sister were a mom for a little bit When they split And then he ended up with my dad She ended up with my aunt And I was in my mom for most of

For alone without my So I didn't really grow up with my siblings Like past the age of like seven I think Seven right But yeah we all went different Legit different parts of the country But yeah it was a really hard divorce You've been to divorce

You get it But that one was really That was a really hard divorce for my mom So I think it was It was very easy for him. But anyway, so I wasn't ever, he wasn't really involved in my life, but then we moved to Burliss in Texas. And that's where I like kind of, you know, the last half of my childhood years, whatever,

you know, until senior year in high school or whatever. And then I got out. I just really, I don't know, I really, I love the small town. I grew up and I still love going back. My friends that live there and family that live around there. But I wanted to get out. I was always this way. Like I was, no, that's not true.

I was actually very shy until singing. Nobody believes this, but I was, because it's unbelievable, I get it. But I was really shy, like wallflower, painfully shy, would cry to my mom, like, if I felt, like, in crowds of people. And then, literally, I was just having such a hard time. And I don't know what it was really at the time, but she just, she told me to start, like, writing it out, like, in a journal. And that led to, like, poetry. And then that led to songs. And then that led to me singing.

Then my personality literally, I think around the age of, I don't know, 15 has been this. So I haven't really changed, like, since, you know, personality-wise. I mean, I believe that because the stage is a very different kind of experience than life, you know. So I get it. I know a lot of people must think, like, there's no way that this could have been a shy person. But no, that actually makes a lot of sense. Well, I think any kid, when you find something that you find confidence in, like, if you find your special at, or people say you're special at it, or then you latch on and you think, and then it almost becomes a little bit of your identity, just because that's especially in school, like, oh, she's the one that plays volleyball. She's one that, you know, became a little bit of that.

So I think with that came confidence. So, yeah, I kind of got pushed into a lot of things that were, like singing opera, like doing all that kind of stuff. Yeah. Let's talk about your voice for a second. Okay. Because this isn't just like, oh, Kelly, write your thoughts out. Oh, make them rhyme. Oh, write a song. It really was. No, no, no. But, okay, so maybe that was. But when you sing, like, you have a very exceptional, like, you have an exceptional voice. Like, there's something very otherworldly about that kind of power coming out of this person. So, was it like, like, I don't know, did you sing in church? Like, was it like, oh, this girl's got a voice because you have a voice that's almost like

disproportionately enormous and stunning for, especially for a teenager. Well, I mean, no, but, but that's not to say that you need to be tall or whatever, but I'm saying like, you're the kind of person that when we, the public of the world, heard it, it was like, oh my God, like, what? How? So did you know you had that voice? No, I mean, honestly, this sounds like such a a dumb answer, but literally I grew up around a lot of singers. Like everyone in my small town,

everyone sang in church. Right. Everyone did all of that. I really wasn't that special in that sense. Like everyone around me sang and sang well, mind you. So I think that the difference for me is, I did put a lot of work in. I had some choral directors that were really hard on me, like make you cry hard on you. In a good way, in a sense, because it did make me, you know, who I am today, but would really push me and not accept anything less

than what they knew I could do. That really pushed me. I think, you know, it's just like if you ever meet a guitarist that learns classical, you know, how to play classical, you know, musical guitar, they can probably go through any genre. because of that skill. Right.

And if you have that skill set, you're kind of able to more like flow in different genres. So I knew that the only way my poor behind was ever going to make college or ever going to get out was going to have to be scholarship because my mom was a teacher.

So we made like $5 over the limit of like you're not going to get financial aid. So we were like right above it. So I knew that the only way I was going to be able to go to call, college was for singing. And then I worked my ass off for like years in high school, like earning that and getting enough to where I could get scholarships.

And then I chose not to go. And I lived on a mattress in L.A. in some people's house. And, yeah, just went after my dream. I guess I had a lot of older friends. I don't know if y'all had this experience. I had so many older friends in my town. They came back and they wasted their first year of college.

They just like partied. It was their first time. They ever had freedom, like, without their... And they wasted it, and I was like, I don't want to waste a year of my life doing that. So I moved to L.A. and had, like, four jobs. Wow. But I honestly don't think... I feel like I've always been a voice under construction.

Like, even now, like, I like my voice better now than I did in my 20s. And I feel like it's always, like, it improves because, one, you warm it up, you cool it down, you know how to use your voice. You've also lived. And then I was going to say, but also experience in not like singing, but experience in live, there's nothing worse. I don't care if you're a singer and not a singer. There's nothing worse than hearing someone sing a song,

and you're like, you've never felt. Well, so it's funny you say this because... It drives me next. Yeah, I'm a piano player, and I play a couple different things, but piano's kind of my baby, and I taught both of my boys to play, because, like, that's what you do. Like, that's what we do in our house.

Like, we play, we sing, like, you have to have this in your jeans, or I'm sending you back to wherever you came from. So my older son has a much better musical memory than I do, meaning I will still play Moonlight Sonata looking at the music. I'm like, mostly there's muscle memory and I know it, but he just like can memorize three pages in his head. But what's interesting is while he technically has it,

there's something missing because he's 15. And it's like, I didn't even think that you could have that in piano, where like it's almost like I'm like Miles, give it some schmaltz. And he's like, but I'm playing it. I'm playing it right. But it's the feeling. Totally.

And as a musician, I never thought that I would progress well into my 30s. Actually, during my divorce was the first time I ever wrote a piece of music. I've been playing since I'm four years old. I never wrote a piece of music until during my divorce. And it's funny because when I play that song, my younger son who was, I mean, he was four when I got divorced. The first time I played that song in years, his head swiveled around.

Like somewhere in his, so I would play with him nursing in my lap. I wrote this and it's like he heard it. But that notion of that like we evolve as people and it comes out in our music, I never even realize that that's a thing. But it's so true with a voice. No, I mean, even like people will say now, like they'll watch like the Kelly Okies on the talk show and I'll be like, your voice sounds like stronger than it did like as you're getting older and I'm like look I saw I never believe that could even happen until I saw Tony Bennett sing and I didn't even know a ton of Tony

Benny music I knew some like everybody does but like no one should I didn't know a ton and I'm just saying I went to this thing like to sing at it and he got on stage and I was like dude was like 86 years old I don't know how old he was like and he sounded so good Like, not like, you know, the older woman in Quiet Church with the loss vibrato that's going crazy. Like, not like that. Like, sounded like really good. And I was like, whoa. It actually goes with this book I've been reading.

I don't know if you'd be into it. But it's called Lifespan by David Sinclair. And the longevity specialist, David Sinclair from Harvard University. Yeah, yeah. He's like, it's like an interesting. Somebody turned me onto it. And I was like, and more so, like, not for aesthetics, but for like on a cellular. level, it's interesting, like you said, your muscles, your everything, how it can deterrent,

but it can get better. I think by the time you're 80, whatever, you'll be sitting at that piano and you will play so much better than you're even playing now. If it's really a way you use for therapy, you use for, to, you know, just as an outlet, I think. And you said you wrote a piece during your divorce, well, I haven't written this many songs since I was like, 20. Like I've got like it's because a lot of it is that's our outlet music is your outlet. It's your it's your like you know escape and and therapy. My NBialx breakdown is supported by superpower. We all know the feeling of leaving a doctor's office and kind of feeling like we didn't get anything out of the experience that was useful.

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Can you just, you know, give us sort of the, you know, kind of from a mental health lens, how your life changed in terms of you're becoming this public person, you know, entering the stage of the universe. And really going on, you know, I mean, you still look 19, but really going on this whirlwind, you know, journey as a musician, as a pop star, like, what has that, if you could sum it up, Like what has that journey felt like? I mean, an experience. And they're all, it's all different. Like, every time someone asks me anything about, you know, mental health and like

the industry and, like, working in it, I literally always think of this one moment. I had in my garage at Texas, or when it was in Texas. And it was at my house. And it was just, I don't know why, but it was right after I finished like the third tour for my breakaway record, which was like the biggest record for me. and I don't know why, but I needed milk or something. It was something so weird. But I needed milk, but I just didn't want to see people, like, because I was empty.

I was like, I was like, I have no fuel to, like, be. And it's not that I didn't want to be nice. It's just, I just had no fuel. And I was run down. I didn't know I could say no yet, you know, and as a girl, especially from the south where I'm from, it's like, you don't want to appear lazy or bitchy or all the things. So I didn't really have that. knowledge in my courier. So I literally needed milk and I looked at my brother and I just like

literally started hysterically crying because I was like, I can't take it back. And at the time, Jason was just like the whole time was like, what are you talking about? And he was trying to help me, but I was just like, I can't take it back. I can't, you can't take it back. Like, you're just famous. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, even if it doesn't work out, you're not famous anymore, your career goes to crap or whatever. You're still famous. Like, people still know who you are, you know, a lot of places. So I don't know why, but for some reason that one moment, I don't know, it must have been like 2005, 2006, somewhere on there.

But I literally, I had like a, not like a breakdown, but I had like a moment in my garage where I just cried it out for like a good, solid 10 minutes in front of my brother going, I can't take it back. And I was like, I just want milk. I don't want to go get milk because I don't want somebody to talk to me. I was like, but it was, you know, it was four postmates. And I lived out in the country. But anyway, so.

I think there's been, you know, a few moments kind of like that that have been hard because even in a small town, like growing up in a small town like I did, everyone knows everything about you. And there are those moments in your small town where even though it's a small town, it might not be relevant or, you know, of no consequence to other people. You know, when you're a teenager in a small town and somebody knows something that you don't want, that's a big thing. So it's like I was already used to that feeling, but it was just on such a glorious. global level that I think it was overwhelming.

And there have been a few moments like that in my career, especially just because I think the biggest thing for me in my whole career is just being me has been really hard. Like, no manager would ever want me to do this. I have no makeup on my hair and pigtails. Like, I earn braids, so whatever. But I'm like, I'm comfortable. And I was potting plants and doing gardening stuff.

And I had the morning off. So I didn't want to have to get. But no, but everybody, you know, would always micromanage everything and try to get you to be somebody that you're not. And the hardest part has been being me. And so I think that's been the hardest challenge, I guess I'd say, with mental health. Now, I feel very blessed because I know a lot of people in this industry, and I bet y'all do too, where for whatever reason, they're just not built for it. And they can break. I don't think I'm built for it, Kelly.

Well, you can break. You can break because it's overwhelming. it's damaging, especially with social media. It's defeating. Jonathan really likes to encourage me to be myself, but it's very hard. And I think especially as a woman, there's like this whole expectation of like,

I need to wear makeup. Like if I'm going to talk to you, right? Like I need to wear makeup. And, you know, there's this whole question of like, well, if I feel better when I look better by other people's standards, does that count, right? Okay, so there's a way I'm supposed to look

I don't feel comfortable. I don't feel like myself. I still feel like other people get to tell me, oh, you shouldn't wear that. You wear black too much. Or like, can you lose some weight? Like, why is your body like that? You know, like, that's still a bit hard. Let me reject, though, because this is what happened with me is I was sitting in a room full of, no offense. I love, first of all, let me say, I love men. I love older men. They're great. but I was sitting in a room full of men that were far older than me

and telling me what I should be like what I should say in interviews what I should sing what I'm like y'all don't even listen to me you're not even my core audience like how would you know and I realize in that moment

I will never please anyone I won't you can't please them all so it's like and I know it's like something people say all the time, but you literally, like on my talk show, I say things all the time. People get so pissed all the time. Like, at random things that I don't think, I mentioned that I spent my child and somebody thought I, like, your CPS should be called. And I'm like, what? Like, good luck finding a better home. Like, I'm like, why don't like a great mom? Like, but it was just like,

you know, you could say anything and you won't ever please them. So I think the goal is, some days I wake up and I love my glam squad. My, I get out of my freaking glam room and I am like, Harry freaking Potter just got a hold of my face. Like, I don't even look like the same human. Like, and I think I look fine now. But they literally do such a, it's art. That's what it is. It's just how I sing.

They paint. They, you know, do what they do. And I can't do my hair like that. And I can't do makeup like that. And I don't enjoy doing it. So I like doing it for work because I think it's fun. It's like dress up almost when you're a kid. But like, but in my every day, like, nah.

I'm not going to like get dressed up to go to Target or hang out with my friends. or like I'm going to do what I want to do in that moment. Like some days you wanted wear a dress because you're like, I'm feeling flirty. Or some days, well, mine aren't you just flared like floy? But and then some days I put mascara on if I'm like, you know, I feel like crap. So like you said, like sometimes if you appear, like I learned that like choir. Like even we used to for singing classical stuff we do in competitions,

you sing behind blinds, which is funny because now I'm on the voice. But you'd sing where they can't see. you. So no one could have favoritism. So no one knew who was in the room. You just were a number. But we all looked dressed up because our directors would say, you do feel different. Your whole thing, you do exude like, okay, I feel like I put a cute outfit on. I feel ready. I feel like, I feel like I'm ready for what I've been rehearsing for. And I'd put on like a little look gloss and some mascara. That's about it. But that's what made me feel ready. So I think it's, It's to itch his own.

Like, everybody's not going to... I know girls that love makeup. They don't... They go to sleep in it. They wake up in it. They wear 5,000 pieces of jewelry, which is great, too. But it's like, that's awesome because that's who they want to be. And I don't think I should take that away from them either.

Like, so I just think everyone's different. There's like dudes like you. Like, so there's dudes like you that love wearing watches and suits and... She's calling me a dude. We're doing great. No, no, no. Not you. Talk about your man.

And no, I'm just saying there's there's dudes that like, guys, like doing that. And there's some that love athleisure. Like, we're all different. And I think it's all acceptable. What's that leisure? I don't even know what. What is that? Athletia, it's like nicer athletic order.

Oh, that's what he likes. Don't want to wear anything else. No, that's what I'm saying. But you know that other dudes are like, I don't leave my house without a suit on. Like, it's like, it's to each his own. Some people, it's whatever you're feeling comfortable in that moment. And I think every moment calls for something different. Jonathan, do you have anything to say?

Well, you've done more to be yourself lately than ever before, especially in the Call Me Cat response to criticism video you put on YouTube, which got all of this attention and talking about how you know you're not wearing things. That was actually a very Kelly Clarkson thing to do. I was like, wait, what did you do? I missed it. Should I explain? Yes.

Okay, so I have this TV show for Fox and it's called Call Me Cat. And she's this. Okay. I mean, I think the most notable things is like, I don't wear Spanx. that choice. I didn't lose two dress sizes to play this character. Like I wear sneakers with dresses. Like I don't wear a lot of makeup. I barely do my hair. Like I mean, well, believe me, we do my hair so it doesn't look like I wake up. But, you know, a lot of people were like, why does she look like that? Why is she dressed like that? Why is she so weird? Why she talked

to the camera? And I did a video. It was a very Kelly Clarkson inspired energy of like, hey, y'all, you don't have to like it. But here are the reasons that we actively chose to make this character look the way she did. And if you still don't like it, that's also totally fine. But it's a decision I made to show what a woman looks like when she doesn't have to lose two dress sizes in order to be acceptable to you. And I don't wear a ton of makeup. And I don't do fancy hair. And like, I bite my nails. So like, I don't need to wear fake nails. No, I mean, on top of what you just said, I just literally had this conversation with my friends. I saw a woman the other day and I was like, I was in shock because I was like,

In this industry, and by the way, I do not care what anybody does. I think you should get whatever, boob, job, butt job, lift, wax, whatever you want to do. I think you should do you. But it was interesting because I had a woman on my show today and she was an older woman and I was like, she is so beautiful. What is different about her? Like what is, it looked so beautiful. She just looked different and I couldn't figure it out.

and in my makeup arms, she doesn't have work done. Oh. And I was like, oh my God. I was like, that's what I was like, why does this woman look so beautiful? Like, like, like I couldn't explain. It was a different kind of beauty. And I just hadn't seen it because usually, you know, a lot of people feel pressure. Well, we don't see, we often don't see women my, I mean, I'm 45.

We often don't see women my age who haven't already started. Most people start having work done in their 20s. Like, people. that you see on camera, and I think that's something most people don't realize, people, women, and men, but women in particular that you see on camera. And men. But women that you see on camera, they, the industry starts with like, oh, if you start a little bit here in your 20s, it'll never fully progress to like the wrinkles that you see. They're like the straw lines. Like when you puck her up to, you know, drink from a straw, you get those little lines. So you can start filling

those. Yeah. Yeah, you can start filling all that stuff. And, you know, that's also another reason that I hope to get out of the industry before that becomes an issue. Or no, that's the reason to stay in it. Like, that's, that's the, that's the beauty of it. Is it, I'm not even against that. Like, if people don't want the poker, if you don't want, great. But I also think that there's room for everyone. Like, I'm going to look like a total charpe. Like, I'm just like a dog. Like, I'm going to have every wrinkle in the world on my face. Because you know what I know why? It has nothing to do with me being better than somebody. to get sent the phrase. I am afraid of stuff

called botulism toxin. I'm just going to lay it out there. It's literally called botulism toxin. And I'm like, no. Like, if any needle that goes in my body is either taking blood to check my thyroid or because it's off. You have a thyroid condition too or twins? Thyroid is crap. I'm working on it.

But anyway. Wait, I want to talk about your thyroid. Healthy things for you. Not like, you know, a bunch of pharmaceuticals or much things that mess you up. I'm afraid of stuff like that. So, like, that's not, like, me being like, I'm above it. Sure. I'm terrified.

If I weren't terrified, I would be sitting right here with some double Ds. I'm going to be real with you. Because I never had big boobs and I always wanted big boobs, but I'm terrified. I would never get a boob job because I'm, I'm like, why would I cut on myself on purpose? Oh, let's not think about it. Wait, I do want to. No, I know, but I'm just saying, like, but I have no problem people doing that. I just, but I think you said, oh, I hope I get out of the industry before then.

I hope I don't. I hope I'm still having my talk show and I hope people see, like, this is what it looks like. This is what, this is how you. look when you get older. It's fine. This is now her inner voice, by the way. I'm just going to cut up clips from your little mini monologues here. These are affirmations with Kelly Clarkson. No, I'm saying,

I don't think we're that different. Like, having the conversation, I think we're very similar. You just have more of an FU attitude and Mime is conflicted about it. I don't have an FU attitude. I have an F me attitude. I think that you have to be a little less educated. Like, you're too

educated. She thinks too much is what I'm hearing. Well, at some point, I think it just is so, it's so, when it happens to you all the time, you're just like, it's not even like an FU attitude. It's like a, this is me and I'm cool with it. And I am totally cool if you're not cool with it. I'll just say this. You have a sense that like you're really, it's really important for you to take consensus and you really value the people's opinions that you have around you. That's because I don't trust myself.

Why? Exactly. The difference between me and Kelly Clarkson, a sentence I've never begun in my life, is that... She has more hit records. She has all the hit records. No, the difference between you and me, and I'm not saying this to get attention, I'm not okay with who I am. If I were okay... Wow.

Do you know how crazy that sounds to other people, though? No. You came on my show, and I was like, I literally looked at your Wikipedia, and I was, like, I literally looked at your Wikipedia, and I I was like, Jesus, I'm a dumbass. Like, I was like, I literally looked at your thing and I was like, what an astute, like, and I'm not saying this because you're like, you know, in the beginning you're making the joke, like famous people saying, oh, no, you're cool, you're cool. I'm not doing that.

I'm being real. Like, as a woman, I was like, man, I'm in the presence of someone that is not only cool, beautiful, so intelligent, has been just killing it since you were how old? Like, that's, that's, it's so funny how people perceive you and how one person. receives themselves because it's totally different. She also hosted Jeopardy, just FYI. I have hosted. See, I missed that.

No, but I lost it family feud. I wanted to do family feud. I couldn't find a date that didn't coincide with my filming. No, a lot of my, and I have, I have chosen to talk about being a person who struggles with eating disorder. So I've chosen to speak about that here, but that is like the veil that hangs over almost everything I do. because all I was thinking was like,

I mean, I tried on a million dresses because I wanted to look so... I'm going to cry, you guys. It's already started. I tried on so many dresses because I wanted to look so great when I got to meet Kelly Clarkson. Like, that was like literally a thing.

I tried on all these dresses and I was so excited and like everyone just like didn't feel right and I'm like picturing myself next to you because that's another thing that I really admire about you is like you have a really,

like, you have an outrageous sense of fashion sometimes and you just like own it. Like everything you wear, you look like, I don't care what you think. Like, I look awesome. Like, with a belt and you're always accessorized. And, like, you do these awesome different things with your hair. Like, you're very diverse in how you present yourself. And I just wanted to look good for, like, a seven-minute segment.

And I remember, like, the size on the dress was not what I wanted it to be. It was, like, the kind of dress that they don't make in big girl sizes for me. Like, it was a whole S-storm. And the thing that I was most excited about, was that my calves still look the way I want them to. So at least I wore sparkly shoes when I got to be on Kelly Clarkson. With your sexy calves. So that if nothing else, like people would be like, well, at least her calves look good.

Like, that's literally what it was like. And so it's like if I could disappear. Like, I want to disappear. Wow. That's so crappy. Yeah, it doesn't feel good to be me. I mean, can I tell you how you just described me, though? First of all, you should know this.

almost 99% of the things that you see me in, I would never have bought, like I literally, I let my stylist dress me in whatever she wants to. Now, sometimes she could put me to something. I'm like, no, girl,

I can't do this. Like, I feel like it's not good. But 99% of the time, I literally walk in and go, what do you want me to wear? What do you think vibes? Because I'm a singer and a songwriter. I'm not a fashion girl.

That's not my, I'm literally wearing a Joshua tree. Like, I'm wearing you two and some sweatpants that I only literally ran a mile in today. Because I was like, I don't want to do anymore. And I was like, no. But my point is, is my glam squad, like, you hear my, anytime you see my hair, that was never my idea. It's Robert. You and I shared a hair person.

I know, but I tell Robert, I tell glow and I tell Candace, those are my glistful people. I say, do what you want. Like, this is not my field. I'm going to sit in this chair. however I look when I, you know, appear it will be cool. Like I obviously, you know, at the end of the day I go,

ooh, maybe not that thing or whatever. But 99% of the time, they've never even worked with someone like me. Like, because I don't, it's not that I don't care. It's that I care enough to hire people and pay them well to do their job.

Like, okay, so hold on. But this is, this is where there's a breakdown because what people want me to wear, it doesn't feel good. Meaning they want me to, like, does it not feel like?

Does it not feel? good because it's not your norm or just it's not feel good because I will say this. It's not me. It's not me. She would literally put me in something like, because I don't know about you, but I'm not one thing. Like, I would wear this. I would Yeah. No, I'm not. I'm not one thing.

I would wear what you're wearing. I would wear a ball gown. I would wear a lot of different things. This is, this just became like Kelly Clarkson doing therapy for me, which is literally the dream that I had four nights ago. Here's the thing. I've been nominated for an Emmy four times. I've lost all four times my children would like me to remind everyone. But for those four, for those four times,

there's a tremendous amount of pressure about what you're going to wear on that carpet. It's a very big deal. I don't care. Well, I understand, but I can't not care because the things that I've had designers try and put me in, it's like insane. What other people would design for me is like, let's make my ambiolialic look edgy. Let's make her what they think is. Let's make my ambiolic look sexy. But part of the problem is I don't like the process. I don't like talking to people. I don't like multiple fittings. So my solution is put me in something black, put me in something that shows off that I'm curvy in the places that I like to be curvy. I'm kind of like old Hollywood curvy. I think that's great. This is my point. My point was why is it that

you keep saying that you want to only wear black? You want to do that. You know what you want. And yet you keep going and letting people do all these things and present all these ideas that you don't end up liking and you hate this interview is over thank you kelly no no i just know here's the thing too i like that too sometimes i'm like literally i walk in like i just went my friends surprised me for a my my birthday is not for like five days but they surprise me for a birthday weekend happy birthday and well thank you it's in a few days but they um they surprised me went to Vegas and i was like girl we had some drinks we ate what we wanted. We were the slot machines. Like, I didn't watch a damn thing I was doing because I was just having a good time. So I'm going to get to work tomorrow. And I literally,

this is our joke. I walk in and I go, you need to go towards the far end of the closet where the bigger options are. Like literally, that's my thing can of shoes. Like, how are you feeling today? I'm like, I'm fine. The left side's good. I'm feeling a little thin. I'm feeling good. And then I literally will come in and be like, no, I had a girls weekend. So we need to head that way. And we literally, I have a closet that ranges. This is not a joke. Tricia's right here to tell you, my body is an anomaly. It should be studied when I die.

I can literally gain two sizes or lose two sizes from morning to lunch. It is the weirdest thing. It's all inflammation, whatever. And so, anyway, so I literally, I have all these options. And some days, I'm like you, I'm like, I don't want to think about it. I just want to put some black on. I don't want to, I don't have to worry about sucking in. Okay, you know what?

Like, you know what? And then we're going to get to Jonathan's comment. I'm not as famous as Kelly Clarkson. That's the problem. What? But this is exactly where I was going to go next. I was going to ask Kelly because she always says this. She can't be herself.

She has to fit in. And she blames it on her status of where she is. And I'm like, you're accomplished enough to do whatever the heck you want at this point. Nope. What? Exactly. You have a very altered. You have a friend like you.

You have a very altered of like what people see you at. No, but by the standard. That's exactly what I say, Kelly. We're going to talk about it. By the standards of our industry. There are absolutely avenues of publicity, photo shoots, and levels of esteem that people are not interested in me for. So I think in my public, and I love. That's been me too.

But I think it's not about my career. Easy there, sister. No, I'm saying, but no, but that's why people get interested in their life. Right. No, but that's, that's life. Okay, but this is the thing. And I think for my publicist, and this is her job. is to be like, what is it that could get Mayam into Hollywood Reporter, right?

Like, what is it? No, but my question is, like, who cares if you're in it or not? Like, I don't, I, I'm the wrong person to ask about stuff like this. Heather's going to say you can never speak to Kelly Clarkson again, and you can't listen to her music. She's poisoning in my mind. What is the least amount of things you can do to make an impact life? That's why, like, because, and that's literally been me my whole career.

So I mean, I've gotten, like, ridiculed for, you know, turning down things that people are like, why did you turn that down? Because for me, it wasn't a very important thing. It didn't hold a lot of weight for me. And why I won take that opportunity away from somebody that would mean something incredible to them, you know, and I think we're all different. That comes back to the same thing. It's just we're all different. But I don't think you, I think you, like from this conversation, I think you try too hard. You're already badass.

You don't have to try. You are so cool. If people are only listening to the audio, you've got to see mine's reaction to Kelly Clarkson setting her straight. What is happening? A lot. A lot's happening. I would give my all to, like, have the knowledge you have. I would give my all to, like, not only just like you're smart, but just in the industry.

I don't know. I perceive you differently, I think, than you obviously. I think we all do that. Let's talk about your thyroid. Let's talk about it. It works like this. The reason, well, okay, so the reason that I would like to talk about your thyroid is because. Because, okay, so I have an overactive thyroid.

So we have different things. That's dangerous. Yes, it is. I know. So I was diagnosed with my thyroid condition in college, and it is much harder to manage. Yeah, hyperactive. Yeah, hyperactive is different to manage and the medication that we have to take, we can't take forever, and it often leads to needing to have the thyroid removed, and there's all these

things. And also, if I quit my job and left Hollywood and spent all my time in an ashram getting acupuncture, or three times a day. I do believe my body would find a new resting place, but... What if you gave less Fs? Do you think it would also? You know what? That's not helpful.

That's, okay. Both of you need to cut it out right now. Oh, my God, I love... I'm back channeling with Kelly as you speak. What I was going to say, though, is the thyroid is one of those things that is very strongly connected to your emotional system. Everything. And, well, also everything, but specifically, it's one of those things.

that so many women that I talk to have a thyroid condition, usually an underactive thyroid. Usually it's hyper. But also, and I'm not asking you to like, well, okay, I am also opening the door for you if you'd like to spill your guts. But so many of the women that I talk to who get diagnosed with a thyroid condition were also having a tremendous amount of mood stuff or stress or like all these things. And it's one of those things that like classic Western medicine is like, here, we'll shut off your thyroid or here we'll give you what your thyroid is missing. But the Eastern, like the Eastern

medicine approach, like the more holistic approach is like, what's going on in your body that your thyroid is attacking itself, right? And that, so I'm actually curious when you were diagnosed, obviously it's linked to weight. Like, that's the thing people most think about. That's, that's how I found out. Because I couldn't, I was with a trainer and they were like, why can you not, like, we work out, like, like, all the time. Well, I don't understand why you're not. And I was like, I don't know. I'm not like sneaking food like a college you know have munchies or anything I'm like I'm just doing my life but we found out

that it was very underactive and I thought I God's on this truth I never really heard much about it sure I was like 25 maybe and I made a joke and I was like this is just that fat people thing when people get fat they're like oh I must see my thought I arrived and I'm like you know and I was like I thought it was just people

BSing so and then I found out I was like oh it's real that's karma it's ironic And then it happened and I got put on medicine. It was, it's really incredible two things, because you said something a minute ago that I do think that you can do things holistically that you don't have to go and live with a or a combination, right. Yeah, no, I do think that I don't know about hyper. I don't know much about that, but I know about hypo.

And it is amazing how I had been running on little to no fumes, like, you know what I'm saying, or just fumes, I guess, little to no fuel and just fiends. And then when I started feeling what base level was supposed to be feeling like, I was like, what? Like, and then I got really annoyed with having to be reliant upon medicine. And so then I, I mean, I ate so clean. I did all these things. I've read the books and, you know, with thyroid. And I read a lot about how a lot of people blame a lot of things with Hashimoto's.

I have that as well, which a lot of people have that autoimmune disease. If you have thyroid issue as well. Same thing. I did too. And so I read a lot about how, because I lived on antibiotics from like the age of 20 to 24. Can you explain why were you living on antibiotics? I had walking pneumonia, bronchitis. Like, I had so many things going wrong and my body just couldn't keep up with the schedule. And, you know, managers and everybody that works with you is just, they're just, they just want you to keep going. Get her better. Get her better.

Yeah. Get her better. Put a B12 in her ass. That's it. You know, it's just like whatever gets her to that level. So anyway, so, and I didn't know the antibiotics was bad for you like that. I didn't know it ruined your gut floor. I didn't know any of that, you know, information. A lot of that information really wasn't privy to a lot of us yet on the norm. So they do say that a lot of that has to do with, you know, leaky gut, you know, kind of leased all these things.

Because antibiotics are really, you know, for a quick things for men in war. Like, you know, using those things like that, that's, you know, how it originally, you know. Well, and also, hold on, as our local, you know, PhD, I do need to say that antibiotics can be in our life-saving medications. 100%. That are absolutely critical to many situations. We used them too freely. We used, and this is something, Jonathan and I are old school hippies.

So, like, we've been talking about this for, I mean, since our kids were tiny and even before then. So, yeah, but I just want to, like, disclaimer is very important to have antibiotics, but they are overprescribed. and especially in our industry, it's like, let's give her a steroid injection in her vocal cords. She'll be fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right, okay, sorry. So go ahead. No, so I'm not against it. That's why I said. They're invented and they're wonderful, there are wonderful drugs that are lifesaving, like you said. But we abused them in our society. And we're like, oh, she has a sinus infection, give her this.

Oh, she has a, it's whatever little things. It's for bigger ailments, not these small ones that, whatever. So anyway, there's a lot kind of linked to it. And, you know, then now I work with this amazing doctor, because I also have Lyme, but it's inactive, I guess, or what I didn't. So anyway, so I found this amazing doctor out here in L.A. That literally has been life-changing for me. Like, I didn't know anything about peptides that are like natural, not pharmaceutical,

like natural ones. I didn't know anything about NAD. I didn't know anything about any of these things that our body produced, but then stops producing at a certain point because of, you know, DNA fractures or whatever happens with us. But, you know, the years you put in early in. your career in particular. That can also lead to, this is another hippie term

that people don't wanna think about, except we have to, adrenal failure is a thing. Yeah. And adrenal failure is bad. Right, well, and adrenal failure is basically the holistic diagnosis for workaholism. Like that's what it is,

meaning when you run your body into the ground, your body, your kidneys, your adrenal system will say like, this is a lot. for us and at some point other systems can start breaking down and the thyroid is one of those things that's like

here's your wake up call from the universe that your body is mad yeah and I'm telling you like you said your mood like coming back to that like it alters it like my band they work because we all work really hard like my crew were just a bunch of kids that

we still you know love to work hard and have one life to live and that kind of thing but we want to enjoy it too We want to enjoy the ride. Well, we think, I don't know. And the one life. But my band literally were like, what is happening with you right now?

They were literally recently, they were like, you are so like, you're brighter, you're lighter. You don't feel as like heavy with like all, you know, the weight of everything.

And I was like, man, I literally feel like, and this is a horrible thing to say, but I have this conversation with my doctor all the time because I get so angry because I think that wealthy people

can get well. Because there are options for people that have money that can really help not just extend your life but improve your life. And it's one of those things that I get, because even my family that I'll help out and they'll get stuff done too. They're like, man, we would never be able to afford it. And it's like, I know.

And there's so much opportunity in not even like pharmaceuticals, like even natural things that they have that are available, but only for a price, you know. And but I was telling my band and now everybody is kind of linked in with my nerves. of my doctor that I use because it really has changed our lives. Like we're in, we feel like it's not even just base level. You're like living at a really positive.

And it's not like, I don't know. I don't know if you've seen this, but like Coke is like candy in this industry. I've never done that. Like, but people will shove that in front of you. It's been shoved for me so many times.

Drugs have been just shoved in front of me just to like, you know, keep going, you know, speed, like whatever. And it's like, all that is so destructive. And it's like, whatever.

live your life how you want to, but it's so destructive and there's so many beneficial things that are healthy and natural for you that can give you that feeling. I'm picturing an after party and everyone's like, here's the co-cate, but I'm picturing Kelly Clarkson being like, here's some B12 supplements. I know. That's what I'm here's some wheatgrass. I was like, I literally was the thing and I was like, everybody was like, are you look good? I was like, man, I just had some I feel so good. But it's literally, it's because I had an IV of Nad the night before with a Myers cocktail,

which is all the vitamins. And it's, nada is something our body naturally produces. Oh, Jonathan knows exactly what you're talking about. I'm on a daily. I know. You can take a little, yeah, you can take a liquid form. You know what?

NMN is really good too with Resveratrol. But anyway, I'm just saying all these things are really... Oh, that's straight out the David Sinclair playbook right there. I know. I'm telling you, I didn't just read it. I took it in. So I'm telling you, and I literally have done this with my whole camp. And it's been really helpful.

And I think it's such a waste because in an industry where they want you to keep going and they want you to be in your A game, why aren't you giving people things that are beneficial for them as well as, you know, keeping you going? My NBialy's breakdown is supported by Osea. You know, as we head into summer, I am reminded how unpleasant it is to have dry skin. which is what happens for many of us in the winter. I've been using Ocea for years. I love, I just do. I love how their products feel,

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That's 10% off with code breakdown at Osea Malibu. O-S-E-A-M-A-L-I-B-U.com. So two things. One is that in this pandemic, we've done very little to actually talk about optimized the immune system and strengthening the immune system, which I think is a massive disservice. And then number two, about M&M, and M. When you started taking it, so I gave my, like, half a capsule of one of this stuff. Is that what you gave me?

Yeah, that's what I gave you. This was a long time ago. But actually, when I started taking it, it's like almost too intense for me. It makes me, like, so hyper-focused. Like, it feels like I'm on speed to a certain degree. Like, and I'm like, I, like... Tell what happened when you gave it to me? Well, I joke that it was the productivity like supplement because it reminded me of like when I used to try to take Adderall in my early 20s because

Which a lot of people do. I know, but I know a lot of people do. For me, it was horrible. Yeah. So it wasn't good. I used to joke that I would go to sleep and I'd be like, okay, I'm going to sleep now. Sleep, sleep, go, go, go. But then when I took that supplement, I was like also like I worked for 16 hours and my mind was like so sharp and I felt like I had this all this clarity.

but then when I tried to slow myself down, it didn't really work. And I think it changes as you're on it over a longer period of time. But I was curious sort of like in those early days how it affected you. Also, when I gave it to my aim, she was like, she felt super buzzed. She was like, ooh. See, the first two nights, and I think it depends on the chemistry of body. Obviously, you would know that more than anyone. But like I think if you're in desperate need of it, you don't feel it quite hit like how everybody else is.

So I didn't have, like me and my makeup artist, we have completely different bodies. I'm like, good. I just feel focused like in a good way, not like intense way. I feel like I feel like I'm not constantly fighting the lethargy, like that lethargic state, which comes with hypothyroidism. So it's just one of those things that, I mean, and I still obviously take synthroid, but I will say this. When I'm on like a minute ago, mine when you said, you know, if I get acupuncture every day,

if I'd lived here or whatever, I'd be able to. I literally am proof that that has happened. Like I saw it. I went on like the best plan ever. I wasn't even really working out. I literally just changed my food. And that really did change my numbers. And I have horrible numbers like for my thyroid.

So it's, but I was able to get off of synthroid. And then I slipped back or whatever. So, but it's hard, it's hard to keep up. I do want to ask you before we let you go, I do want to ask you because you obviously, and I don't want to touch on anything public or uncomfortable, meaning aspects that have been public or uncomfortable, but you're in a particularly stressful time of your life right now. And I do wonder, do you go to therapy?

Are you a therapy person? 100%. Okay, well, tell us about that. When did you start going to therapy? What kind of therapy? Is it traditional therapy? Is it hypnosis? Is it cognitive behavioral therapy?

What do you do? I, we actually started going, my ex and I. We started seeing someone before we were divorced. And it was because we were just not, we weren't lining up. Like, and no matter what one would say, I'm going to do this, or me do that, like, it just, we weren't lining up. I guess because I'm from a child of a couple divorces with my family, like, it's not so weird to me that, like, you know, you start out in this relationship. You have similar ideals, similar, like, you know, dreams, like all those things. And that can change.

and people can change and things get altered. So I think, you know, we were in there, and neither one of us, you know, wanted a divorce. So, you know, that's why I started therapy. And that's why we all did, actually, in our family. And so anyway, and then it just became, I think, the pandemic hit. And, you know, and I think a lot of, we keep making the jokes in our camp because it's like, oh, another one, COVID got another one, like relationship, you know,

because it's not just getting people. health, it's getting people's, you know, relationship. Yeah, mental health. Because it's, because it is, it's, it's, it's, it was an extreme environment for everyone. Um, and, and, and, and, and, you know, and that went into play and, in, in the decision, but, you know, I think therapy for me was just figuring out, I, I, I am one of those people that I will just keep doing something and, like insanity, like expecting a different result. And, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, because I don't like to lose hope in

anything and I don't I think everyone can change I'm such a Pollyanna in that sense says the girl who's never seen Pollyanna I just know people who's that expression but I've actually never seen Pollyanna but I hear she's really you know yeah everything in life but anyway but anyway my point is is that I needed to to talk to someone outside of myself and I think that that's so important for everyone you don't have to be going through a hard time it's just nice because now you know I've been seeing her for I don't know how long now but like I love like I'm going to talk to her Friday I love talking to her because it's nice to, it's nice to have someone outside of your circle,

outside of your life, and someone that you are just completely in total, just honest about everything that maybe you shouldn't tell people. And, you know, and even like talking about divorce with her, like I was like, you know, having those conversations with her, the stranger was so weird for me. But it was really healthy for me because, you know, a lot of times, nothing's going to get fixed just by,

beating the same dead horse. Nothing's going to be, nothing's going to get resolved if you're both not willing to work towards that same goal, you know, that same vision that you have for each other. And that's not a horrible thing.

I think that was the thing too. I always, I think if you're from divorce, like as a kid, you're like, I will never do that. Like, I never want to put my kids to that. I never would do that. And I was so against it. And I don't know, I tried so hard. And And, you know, and I think people do.

I think you try and it doesn't work. It's a great point because especially when you're in the public eye, that's, of course, the scrutiny you come under. Like, oh, these celebrities. And, you know, I know that's kind of a niche comment, but I remember, I mean, I will never forget this. And I won't name who it was when my divorce became public and I've been divorced for, gosh, I don't know, eight years, almost nine years.

I don't remember something like that. I remember some hosts of a very, very famous, very prominent talk shows. literally spoke about it in the intro to their show and said, serves her right for having her kids sleep in her bed. They literally said she deserved it. I mean, it's outrageous to me. But that's, but that's, I know. And if I were Kelly Clarkson, I'd be like, oh, who cares?

Something like that, by the way, very unhappy with their own lives. Okay, but my point being that especially when you're a public person, people feel that they have a right to decide they didn't try hard enough, they didn't really, you know, they must not have had that big of a commitment, but celebrities are people too. And most of us do not want divorce. It's not seen like, oh, it's just another clean next marriage. Like we try, just like other people do. Yeah, no, I think so too.

I think on the other hand of that, though, I think to some extent we are in the public eyes. So it's expected just because people, you know, you're in the public eye so people, if they like your show, if they like what you do, they like your songs, they like your show, like whatever it is. Like, they're going to be invested, you know, just, you know, it's just kind of the thing, I guess it happens. So, but my thing is I, I don't really, I don't think it's good to say you don't care. It's not that I don't care. I care about people's opinions that I know and respect. Like, I care about, you know, having, God, I think I'm going to do this with my,

sister or with my friends or with people that know and love me on a daily and actually engage with me on a daily. But I do think that, you know, you're always going to have those people in the public eye that are like, oh, you know, well, she deserves it because da-da-da-da. And it's just like, it's just some off comment that some unhappy person that just trying to be funny or witty. I think they wanted to be mean. It means nothing. It means nothing, though. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like it's like, and it's like at the same time, like, who's winning? You are all the way to the bank because she's talking about you. you ain't talking about her.

Like, it's like, I mean, who's, who's the one winning there? You know what I'm saying? Like, it's, I just think you have to keep it, I don't know, I keep it like, because people, my mom, I don't read new things. I chose a long time ago to not read anything. Good or bad. Oh, my mom reads it all. My mom reads it all.

So my mom was like talking to me there and she was like, I'm so frustrated. I guess somebody came out and said something. I had some kind of breakdown or whatever. And I was like, oh, and she was like, I know what you have it. You have to tell people you have it. And I'm like, I don't care. And like, is it bad? Like, if somebody would have a breakdown while they're getting a divorce, it's kind of a huge,

horrible thing. Like, so I'm not going to say, no, I haven't had one even though I have it, because maybe somebody out there did have a bad one during their divorce, and there's nothing wrong with that. I have breakdowns every day, Kelly. I have a breakdown every day. You should stop. We're going to be a part of a group text, the three of us. I will be Venmoing you $350 for your services this hour.

Thank you so much for joining us. Also, Kelly's coming out with her own line of three-minute motivational exercises. You're going to be the first client. That's what I want for Hanukkah. I want that for Hanukkah. I want that for Hanukkah inspirational videos for me. So AI puts the person's name in and then Kelly's like, in one year out the other. You don't listen to that person because they're talking about you.

You know what the best, though? The best thing would just be like every time someone inserts something on the AI thing, it just says the only advice every time is fuck them that's the only advice every time it doesn't matter what your problem is i need a button with kelly clarkson's voice just saying fuck him kelly you are absolutely delightful you are completely yourself and you're awesome and it's really a pleasure to speak to you i'm too lazy to be anything else that's my thing it comes down to apathy all right thank you so so much no absolutely i love you guys We got to do this again.

You know what, Ma'am? I didn't like that interview. From our breakdown to the one I hope you never have. Bye. We don't talk about it. That's it. Why you make me cry? Because I'm your choir director, breaking you down to build you back up.

No, you're not. She has a lot of good information and perspective for you. Let's make a list. No. We're not making a list. You might need more Kelly Clarkson attitude if... You're my ambialic. We have two guests.

so far that I wanted to do motivational recordings for you. One was Hunter, I'm a Grady. Oh my God. Remember Hunter? You were supposed to stand in front of the mirror. You know what? I've tried, okay? I've tried. How's that been going? Not so good. And every time there's that little

bit of meat right under my bra strap, I'm like Hunter says I'm supposed to love it. It's just getting in the way of everything I wear. So after you listen to the Hunter tape and you do the Hunter affirmations, as soon as you hit a snag, you have, you play, Kelly Clarkson's voice saying,

F it. She's a very interesting person. I think she's awesome. I like her attitude. She's smart. She's funny. She's done a lot of work on herself. And I really respect that. And she's listening to her body. And I really like how she,

honestly, I really like how she spoke about her health journey because, first of all, she was very gracious in saying that having access to this level of health care, I mean, the way I heard it, is that it shouldn't be just something for people who can afford it, that these things help people. And it's really, really sad.

I mean, forget about the fact that so much about mental health in particular is become an elitist sport. But I thought that was really beautiful that, A, she honored that and she brought that up. And also, she does a combination of Western and Eastern medicine. And she said she's living proof that you can change a lot of things and not rely on Western medicine. But it's very, very hard to be consistent with that, especially with a busy and active lifestyle. And there's nothing wrong with taking cynthroid if you have an underactive thyroid. That is the medication that, you know, helps bring your numbers up and, you know. It was interesting to hear that when she did have massive lifestyle changes, that she saw her

numbers drastically changed. Well, she said it wasn't even that massive. She's just like, oh, I'm eating the wrong foods, you know. And I know her doctor. It's a, you know, there are a couple in L.A. that are known for that kind of, you know, allopathic medicine of balancing the Western and the Eastern. And it's a commitment, you know, it's a real commitment.

And for people who aren't going to get that type of help, what I wanted to reassure is that lifestyle changes adjusting the level of stress. And people are like, well, I can't adjust the level of stress because I'm, you know, responsible for all of these things. That's what you say when I tell you to avoid the level of stress. That's literally what you say. I also say that I know that I can do better at mindfulness. I can bring more little mindfulness moments into my day. You only say that when I yell at you. I've started cold therapy, which is very painful.

Oh my gosh. Would you like to talk about your cold therapy? Well, if people are following me on Instagram, they will have seen that I recorded a little video. And it says, recorded for someone who knows how much I hate the cold. And it's my son saying, narrating a video of me going into a glacier river. You posted that? I posted me in the water doing the breathing. And it was a short clip. That breathing.

A lot of breathing. Because as soon as I stop focusing on my breathing, it's extremely. pain. That kind of cold seizes up your lungs. I mean, like all the muscles say like, no, I think death is better. That's what it feels like, because it is a glacier-fed river. Is it a glacier-fed river? It is extremely, extremely cold. And you know, a lot of the most common response I got to that video was, but you're a Canadian. And I would like to point out to people, number one, not all Canadians love the cold. And number two, I left Canada for a reason. And number three, Not that long ago, your family was in Eastern Europe, like, trudging through snow,

but that doesn't necessarily mean that you want to live in it. That is correct. It's not like, well, I actually used to joke this with you, but it's not like, I think my younger son was like, but he's Canadian. But it's not like you're an Inuit. It's not like you're genetically. I didn't live in the northern tongue. Right, like you've lived for tens of thousands of years. Actually, when I first got to Los Angeles, I had never lived in that level of

heat and it was like 96 degrees. And I was like, I can't live in this. I'm going to die. And I would walk kind of like bow-legged so that my shorts wouldn't touch my body because I was so hot. But like eight months later and I'm like, I hate the cold and I can live in, I want it to be 100 degrees every day. I have so many things to say. But I think that's going to wrap it up. Well, I'll keep updating people so I stay accountable here. Oh, if you're not following Jonathan on Instagram, you are missing out. You're missing one-wheeling videos. Dad pod.

But I was amazed that just in the first day of being exposed to cold and it was probably like a handful of minutes over the course of a few different sessions, meaning like it was one trip to the river, but like I would get out because I kind of hit my limit and then I would go back in. He calls them sessions. I was amazed that immediately I had noticed. difference in the pain that I have in my hip, which has been, you know, very bad and recently got an MRI. Maybe I'll share my results on Instagram. Well, you know what? Dr. Cohen, one experience decides that it's working because that's the only reason your pain

would go away. From our breakdown to the one we hope you never have from Dr. Cohen and Dr. Vialek. We'll see you next time. Good thing you're cute, Cohen. Science, Ph.D. or two. One, fix you one. And now she's gonna break down. So break down.

She's gonna break it down.