Mention It All - A Tale of Two Carolines Ft. Caroline Stanbury

Episode Date: June 20, 2024

As we wade deeper into the new season of Real Housewives of Dubai, Dylan is joined in the studio by Caroline Stanbury to unpack it all. They start by reflecting on Caroline’s 10-year Bravo anniversary, and how things have turned out differently than she ever could have predicted. Then, she gets into the drama, with some choice words for Caroline Brooks amid their confusing feud. She also shares her thoughts on Sara, Ayan, and new Housewife Taleen, who have all been making a splash on the new season. Later, she discusses her marriage to Sergio, and why the outside opinions usually aren’t worth listening to. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Exclusions apply for licenses, see Home Depot.com slash license numbers. Betches Media presents Ha ha laugh funny Mention It All A Bravo by Betches podcast We don't say that But now we said it With me, Dylan Hafer

Heyver Hey everyone Welcome back to the Mention at All podcast I'm Dylan Hafer And I am here With a real housewife of Dubai A new season we have

But she's been on Bravo for a long time We know her We love her Caroline Stanbury Welcome Thank you for having me And I have been around A long time

But I'm sort of yeah I don't know I don't know if you've looked at a calendar, but actually this season of Real Hustlers of Dubai premiered on the exact 10-year anniversary of Ladies of London premiering, June 2nd. Somebody told me that, and that is kind of crazy. Crazy. And actually, it's when I look back at the scenes with my children. Yes.

People started posting them. It was like, oh, my God, they were babies. Well, I was thinking about that because in this season, your daughter, Yasmin, is looking at colleges. And thinking about 10 years, it's like, that's a long time in the life of a teenager. She has grown up on TV. It's really funny because they're two different shows and I took a break in between. I really forget how long I've been on Bravo. Even between season one and season two of Dubai, it's been a minute since we've caught up with all of you guys. You've had a lot

going on in your life in the last couple of years. Been to BravoCon a couple times. We saw you get married on the first season. So obviously, you know, you've been in your newlywed era the last couple years, you built a house? Like, catch us up on sort of the life of Caroline in between maybe what we didn't see. Well, I mean, exactly what you said. We moved in, which has been great for Sergio and I, obviously. I think, you know, the stress of a wedding, the stress of, like, not knowing where we were going to live, because one, our lease ran out. The house wasn't done. You know, I didn't want to sign a new lease because it was only meant to be two weeks. Well, that, as you all know, the two weeks turned into a few months. But I've never built a house. So who

was going to tell me that it would be so delayed. But anyway, we're in. We're happy. And you know, life is getting, is really, really good, actually. The kids are settled. Yasmine graduated this week. She landed in London just now. She's going on her college grad holiday, the whole load of teenagers. So God help me. I've actually threatened, well, not threatened, but I did ask to air tag her shoes. She's like, mom. Okay. You got to put like an are tag in like each little. Oh, it's happening. Yeah. How do you know it hasn't? Sorry, Yesman. Is she coming to college in the States? No, she was going to, she's going to England. Okay. It's a little closer to Dubai. And my parents are there. Yeah. And it's easy and my family's there. So it's good. Yeah.

That's amazing. I mean, congratulations. I feel like just it's an achievement to have a, a kid who's, you know, ready to go. I mean, like, it's so exciting. I'm so, she's so excited. I'm so excited for her. She wants a little mini with a union jack on it. Maybe that's in the cards, maybe not. But what is it like coming back for a second season? Most of the ladies are back. We have one new cast member who we'll talk about in a minute. But what was it like kind of just being back with the group and kicking off things for this season, you know, post-Bionese concert?

Well, you know, it's like anything. It's like going back to school, isn't it? I think watching season one back, I realized that I was trying to fit in rather than just be who I've always been. And I think this season, what's great is I was like, fuck it. I'm I know, I'm Caroline Stambray. I know exactly who I am. Who are you to tell me that, you know, I've never done anything in my life. And, you know, and once I went in with that attitude, nothing, it's like, you know, water off the duck's back, isn't it?

And I think that's what irritates them. It's just my, my cool, calm, collective demeanor. Well, I think also when you're in a group like this where you have a lot of big personalities, people, you can be fighting with someone one week and then, you know, shifting into a new phase of friendship before too long, it can frustrate people if you're on a good page with somebody that they don't like or if you're fighting with their friend. You can't do that. You can't do that.

It's like getting divorced. You can't tell people as they get divorced, you know, take my side or his side. I never did that in my divorce and I won't do that because ultimately, you know, things change. And like now I'm discussing going on family. holidays with my ex-husband. So, you know, if I'd made my friends choose, that would be very desperately unfair. I won't do that in a group of women either. I'm not 11. I don't need everyone to take, you know, to take aside. If it gets really bad, obviously people should have an opinion and need to have an opinion in these situations and help you out a little

bit. But it doesn't mean that they can't have a relationship. They can still go to lunch if you were friends before. I'm not, I'm not a baby. So with your kind of watching back season one and realizing that you need to kind of just like do you and, you know, go where you feel like going, who in the group do you feel like kind of fit in with that vibe better? It seems like you're maybe doing better with Lisa than you were last year, maybe Ayan a little bit. What's, what shifts have kind of happened for you? Well, it's shifted again, so, you know, I can't really keep up. You know, Iian and I are the biggest shift, I think, and we really, really made an effort to get to know each other in the best possible way we could without the noise. We went to meet each other without telling anyone. And I think that was the best idea we had because we got to go and understand who the other one was and why we react to things the way that we do. And, you know, the things that annoyed me the most about, Ian, I actually find some of the most endearing now. And then I think she understands. understands my sense of humor and the way I am. And I'm British. I mean, that is just the way I speak. This is, this is me excited. This is me angry. This is me, you know. Yeah, I think that there's something. I mean, this is for anyone in life, it's like there's something to understanding your differences with somebody, but realizing that that doesn't have to mean you can't get along. But, you know, Ayan has a very specific sense of humor, a very specific way of expressing herself. Yours obviously is quite different, but that if you can find those kind of like commonalities then it's funny because I can actually see I see IAN's brain going into overload when I say things because she the old one would react straight away and this one digests it for a minute and is it funny or is it not

and then she'll think about it she goes oh yeah she's joking well I even liked in the in the premiere of this season when when you and she met up and there was the the pineapple and all of that and talking about your age comparison it's like those types of moments where it's like you are different and I think that kind of that can be a really fun dynamic to explore versus just kind of always having the friction. I was just so grateful it was a piece of fruit and not a live goat. I don't think Miss goat would last long at Michael's house. No, I mean Michael, poor Michael, we moved in with two housekeepers, three kids, three dogs, two assistants, a driver. I mean, Michael's never lived with anyone. The fact that he's actually still walking right, he's here now in the studio.

The fact that he's still around and we all still friends is a miracle, Frank. So good, so good, so good. Everything you want for summer is at Nordstrom rack stores now and up to 60% off. Stock up and save on the brands you love like Vince, Sam Edelman, frame, and free people. Join the Nordy Club to unlock exclusive discounts, shop new arrivals first and more. Plus, buy online and pick up at your favorite rack store for free. Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack.

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It's time for a little in-person spring treat. It's time for a trip to Ross. Work your magic. It was interesting to watch, though, that meeting that you had with Ayan, kind of the vibe there versus in episode three, the meeting that you have with Caroline Brooks. And it is kind of, it feels like there's a different energy being brought to the table. And that, you know, with Ayan, it's kind of like a fresh new set of eyes where it's like, let's explore this friendship. And with Brooks, it feels like there's maybe a little more baggage in the conversation. IAN comes with a fresh, you know, with actually wanting to make changes and wanting to go forward. I think we all saw from that meeting with Brooks that she had no intention of that. She came late, then told me that she's busy in life.

I mean, and she has children in a business, which I was just kind of flawed by. Pretty sure I do too. So, yeah, there's a difference. I think, you know, we came both of us wanting something. And I, you know, I don't know whether Brooks came with that intention. Yeah, the children in a business thing is interesting because I feel like things always go south on a show like this when people try and kind of like inflate their what they have going on or whether it's a business, whether it's family stuff, whether it's money. It feels like that's kind of always a red flag when you're trying to get to a better place with someone. When you're trying to make amends and then you tell someone make out that you've got more than them in the first sentence or not, and I don't mean financial.

more stress than this than them, more than that. You don't know what's going in my life. I have three teenagers. And just that alone would floor most people. Yeah. And I think also it's like if you're trying to figure out if there is a friendship path forward, then it feels like you're kind of expected to do more. Because if the other person is saying, I'm so busy, I'm here and there and I don't have

time for anything. It's like, okay, so then if I'm going through something, can I expect you to be there for me? probably not if you're if you're just focused on your your busyness yeah i mean i don't really know what that statement was really as i said i've got three kids three dogs turtle a new house new husband uh and quite a few businesses that i run and i still make time so yeah i'm curious to get your take so caroline on on twitter last week she responded to a question kind of about where your issues were coming from because i think at the at tallien's party it felt like things were kind of

maybe deeper than they seemed. And she said a lot more happened off camera and a lot happened on camera. It's a shame you guys don't have context, but I can show you all receipts and walk you through the chain of events so you can understand everything. When you hear that, like, do you know what she's talking about? I'm absolutely clueless.

And so I guess by reunion, she'll have figured something out, depending on me or Tully. Clueless. Your guess is as good as mine. I was clueless the whole way through. It was the week before we started filming. we were friends, so I have no idea what she's talking about.

Yeah. But, I mean, I'm there for, to be enlightened. Yeah, the whole concept of receipts is so interesting because every once in a while, there's something that is genuinely like helpful and clarifying. But then so much of the time I feel like it's, it's something that almost you create in your head of like, I have this thing and once everybody knows it, I'm going to be right. And it's also like, it also, you've got to, what are you going to do? You've got to have the context to the text.

So many people cut it off exactly where they want it. I'm like, I can't live in a life where I have to like literally screenshot every message a friend sends me just in case I might lead it later. So no, I won't be bringing the receipts letter to do it all. Well, and now they've gotten sneaker. You can like edit a text after you send it or like unsend a text? Yeah. Well, don't say that out loud. I mean, I just got accused of sending something last week and they've got my IP address.

I'm like, what's an IP address? I'm like, I'm so clueless on all this stuff. I can barely Google my own name. So I'll let these girls do their worst. Honestly, they've tried for quite a long time. And actually at this point, it's quite funny because I've been on, you know, these shows for quite a long time and Bravo know me. And I think the fans actually this year are really seeing through it.

So I don't really need to do much. Just sit back and let them continue. Well, it's interesting. We've seen on a few different Housewives shows, reality shows in general, kind of the role that social media and receipts and things like that can kind of creep in. And obviously there are times when it's really fun or exciting. But I think sometimes it feels like it kind of can zap a little bit of the authentic like person-to-person relationships when it's like, oh, well, this fan account is saying this thing. So now we have to incorporate that into the conversation.

And that's what I mean. Like if I'm always having to like snap screenshots of messages that I have with friends in case one day, I might need proof of. That's not a friendship. So I won't be doing that. Well, and I think that kind of, it plays into what you were saying,

like your season two vibe of kind of just like, I'm doing Stanbury. I'm like going to have my own way of dealing with things. I don't know receipts. I've got words. I've got etiquette. So talk me through the situation with Tallinn, because to me,

it seemed like basically by the time cameras were rolling, you were ready to be moved on. from it. And it didn't seem like something that was that. It was not. Massive. So me and Nina Ali were at the bar in, she was with me actually, so she can corroborate my story. We'll get Nina on the phone. I think she wants to stay far away from this. I need to phone a friend. No, she was, and we both watched it happen. It was like, it was like the blind leading the blind. So they, you know, Brooks and Tarlene were having, you know, they were very happy, put it that way. I think we've all seen the drunk side of both of them. And Tarleen tripped. And literally, it looked like

she was doing a downward dog. It was very funny. And then instead of helping her up, Brooks, Brooks spoke to her bum for about a minute like it was her face. Like, it was like she hadn't even noticed she was on all fours. And that's what had me and Nina howling. We were howling for a minute. And then we ordered another drink and kept carried on with our night. I mean, I've, I've face planted a bush with Tarleen. It doesn't mean I hate you. It was hilarious. And I told Tarlin, please bring the Bush video to reunion. There you. go, you've got that on me. It's funny. It was really funny. I mean, less funny for her because it was such a big area, maybe not at the Beyonce concert, but it was funny. You know, that was it.

That was really it. I didn't mean death to her. I've never used the word VJ hole in my life. In my life, mine's called a Chi Chi, just so you understand. And that's as dirty as Sergio and I get. So, no, no, I'm shocked. Like, I watch the show and go, oh my God, can we stop? Yeah. Well, it was, it just was, it's strange to watch because like Teline seemed so fine with like, because I explained to her how it was. Like, it was funny. You were doing a downward dog. Like it was really funny. Yeah. And I said, Sergio almost saw Vajajee. Almost. And then she went, oh, I'm glad I wax that day. And it really was that simple. I think we can move on. And you're right. Notice. Did I ever speak on camera about it? Good sleep is everything. That's why Ali's science back support is made with a blend of melatonin and L-thianine

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coming into the group in general? Do you... Oh, actually, I think she's brilliant. She's just... I mean, that woman is TV gold. I like her vibe a lot. She's great. Just a few episodes in.

I met her at BravoCon and I hadn't seen any of the season yet. And she seems like she just like really fits in in a way that's fun. She fits in, she's strong and she's eloquent. So she's strong and she's funny. You know, like you can have a laugh with her, but she'll stand up for herself. And she won't be pushed around by anyone. And, you know, sometimes you can feel quite bullied on that show, you know, with the girls. and she stands up for herself and what's right.

And I love that about her. Yeah, I think especially when you're coming in to an existing show, it's important to kind of, it's to not get too attached to the person who kind of was your, the person you knew the most beforehand. So if that's Brooks for her, it's like, yeah, you're going to be friends with your friend, but then also really like make an effort to get to know the rest of the group.

I think that's a big mistake a lot of people make. They think they bring people in that will just always be their wingman. But when you have six women in a room, you'll never be able to gauge or control their reactions to thing, ever. You know, so, you know, you need to get that out of your head. Yeah, you mentioned the meeting with Brooks feeling like maybe she was a little bit jealous or insecure about your becoming closer with Lisa and Ion. And I feel like Tallinn must also sort of play into that, that if it's this new person that you thought, yeah, I think she was shocked how many people quite like me. And I'm, I'm quite a nice person. I'm,

know that's hard to believe, but, you know, I'm quite a nice person when you get to know me. I know. It's, I feel like it's, you know, nice is not always the same as like warm and fuzzy and just being a doormat. But like, you know, warm and fuzzy is not really how I was brought up. And that's what I understand. I'll never be warm and fuzzy. If you want warm and fuzzy, take my husband.

He's very warm and fuzzy. Yes. Speaking of your upbringing, I thought it was really. interesting to watch your therapy session on episode three of this season and kind of going into your upbringing and the boarding school, the question of it all. What was it like kind of sharing that side of yourself on the show? Well, because, you know, look, it was interesting for me because actually it makes so much sense. I'm lucky because I think I don't, I, even when I'm filming it, I don't realize how many people are watching it. So it does, it feels intimate,

even though obviously you're all there. And it was interesting to me because it made so much sense. Of course I am the way I am. I lived half my life in boarding school in what's invariably like a boot camp. You know, you get woken up by a gong. You go to bed. You get told when to eat when, you know, you've got however many minutes. I still eat my food irrationally fast.

Like I will have finished two plates by type of father. You've even sat down and chosen yours. And I never even think about you because I'm so, used to having my food taken away. And that's just, you know, that is ingrained in you. You can't change that. And, well, I mean, maybe I could, but I just don't think about it enough, you know. And I've learned having gone to school, you know, we only went home, you know, three times a year. So you just grow up in a place where you're very, very, what they call it, hyper-independent, I suppose. And I'm hyper-independent. I know how to calm myself. I know how to get myself out

of situations. I know how to deal with everything on my own without looking for help, which I think a lot of these ladies don't, and they need an army, and I simply don't. And I think that puts them, you know, they don't know what to do with that. I'm like, okay, you don't like me. That's fine. I lived in the school with, you know, for half my life with some women that didn't like me. And some did. And I'm okay with that. Yeah. And I think taking that that hyper independence and realizing when it's a strength and maybe when it's something that can hold you back or can well i mean i would definitely want me on your side wouldn't you right but it's like okay like you know if the car breaks down and you need to figure it out that's that's helpful but then if if you're

taking a look at some of here if the car breaks down you need to figure it out i am not the person you want in that car okay bad example you're not changing the flat tire no i'm not even like i'm you know no absolutely not i'll be like you're on your own yeah So your situation with Sergio, I think it's kind of fascinating to watch. I think you guys obviously have a really great dynamic together, but then some of the issues that you're kind of working through and talking about whether you're going to have a child together, talking about your living situation.

Like all of those things I think are interesting and relatable to different people in different ways. But what is it like kind of going through those phases and stuff and sharing that? Well, look, you know, I think the biggest thing for, me and Sergio is the age difference because sometimes, obviously, he's extremely grown up. And sometimes I go, oh my God, you know, the reactions to things is like a child. But then, you know, now I think he's grown so much in the years he's been with me too. And obviously, like, you know, my dream when I got divorced was not to get immediately remarried.

I was never even thinking like that. But I understand I met in much younger man. And these are all his firsts. So, you know, to have three teenage kids that are finally leaving home and I'm super happy and I'm getting like, who I am back and I love it and I travel and we're building in Bali and we're doing all these amazing things and you know that to put a baby in the mix now is very scary to me because you know I I've done it I've done the nappies I've done the late nights I've done all that and you know so I've and I'm 50 in two years so obviously I'm not skipping down that route but on the other hand you know

I have to think about of course he's 29 years old and the baby would be gorgeous and maybe I'll be a great mom in my later eight years. Maybe I'll be more relaxed because I'm not on this like, you know, huge trajectory of being in a big business and I'm sort of, you know, much calmer now. So maybe I'll enjoy it more. So those are questions that you ask. Now, obviously, do we have time? Probably not. You know, do I have to have a surrogate? Yes. So like, what does that look like? How do I find a surrogate? I've no idea. You know, it's like a needle in the haystack, isn't it? Don't know what that looks like. He can't help because he's, you know, he doesn't know anything about all of this stuff either.

You know, Sergio thought he'd be having, you know, jiggy, jiggy in bed and that he'd have a baby. So all of these things, that is about age, you know, and also some of the things Sergio wants to do in life I've already done. But they're, you know, ultimately, overall, you know, he wouldn't and I wouldn't change it for anything. You know, as much as I'm, as I say, these things are difficult. These things, when we look at other people's relationship, what the age gap is actually weirdly something we think really helps us stay together and gives us such an amazing dynamic because we both feel we learn so much from each other and that he's so willing to you know change and and wants to grow into something he feels like he learned so much with me

I don't know we have an amazing relationship we so we really have fun and I think that you know people try to question it and drag it down we've been together five years now you know we really if you see my Instagram is exactly the same as we are on screen, off screen. You know, obviously doing a show adds an extra element and stress to our relationship on top of the wedding, on top of moving. But now everything is, you know, amazing. It really is. Of course we bicker like any other couple, but nothing really, you know, more than that.

The videos from after you had your surgery last year were so funny. And I feel like that's one of those things where it's like you are exactly like, you know, the dynamic is what it is. And like sometimes it's easy. Sometimes it's not. But like, I mean, there is like that relationship is just like. Well, he had a heart attack. I hadn't even told him.

I was going for a facelift. I mean, I was like, go and get me a drink. I'll be out in an hour. And then I got back to that. He got back to that. I mean, it was very funny. But, you know, at the end of the day, I think people forget he's 29 years old.

He didn't even know what a facelift was, really. You know, like when you're 29, you hardly think your wife's going to need a facelift. Do you? So I put him in these awful. positions all the time. And then obviously the facelift, you only see the after. You have no idea. Like what you saw on Instagram is a fraction of how I came out. What was it like in the most recent episode seeing him talking to Sarah and her kind of weighing in a little bit on your dynamic?

And I think she said that he's the punching bag in your relationship and that you need to heal from your trauma. What is what is it like hearing Sarah kind of like give her two sense about that? Well, I think we all know Sarah needs quite a lot of her own healing and needs to sort of just focus on herself at some point. But, you know, I love Sarah and I don't want to say anything about her bad. And I know that she meant it in a way that, like, he's not my punching bag. I mean, as in like, obviously when I'm stressed, I probably do take things out on him as he does on me. But we were living in somebody else's house. And, you know, I think Sarah drags things out into and just said,

he was fine. Sergio always say is click, click. He's like a baby. If I, if I, you know, wave a rattle in front of him, he'll be fine in two minutes. You know, I love that about Sergio. He wears his heart on his sleeve. It was a stressful time. We are not breaking up.

Don't worry. No, and I think that's something where like having a partner, part of the good thing about having a partner is that you can, if you're going through something, you can, you know, kind of put it on them a little bit and vice said. Yeah, and I always think it's very dangerous to get in in the middle of couples. Yeah. You know, we're strong. We're strong. Well, she's on her healing journey too. She's on her own healing journey. I think we'll all, we'll let everybody heal themselves, not each other. What do you think of her and Ayan's friendship letter situation that we're seeing they're trying to get to a to a better place? And how do you feel about that? They have got to a

better place. They are in a better place. They will be in a better place. I think, you know, you're going to see it go down before it goes up. That's for sure. Sarah, as I said, hasn't really got a mean bone in her body. She just, you know, you can't meddle in everybody's business. And you can't fix everything for everyone. And sometimes if there's a broken bird, leave, leave it. Um, you know, so I just think the, the holier than now thing is like a bit exhausting sometimes, but the rest of it, you know, she's, she's coming from a good place. I'm curious, uh, if you saw last week that your former ladies of London castmate Marissa and her husband are splitting up.

I did see that. I sent her text, actually, but she'll be fine. She's a strong one. And look, you know, it happens to the best of us. You know, they've been married a long time at this point in my life. I think everyone should get married twice. That's interesting advice. I think some people would, uh, would not love to hear that. But I'm kidding. Whatever suits you. But like there's, you know, in this, in today's world, there is no need to stick things out. That is the wrong message. If any of you've listened to my podcast, uncutton, nonsense. And it's all I talk about is raising each other and like making your choices. If it's not working for you or not serving you, then, you know, move on. Move on. You know,

you're not, there's no shame in it. Yeah. So I'm happy for her. I'm happy to see what her chapter two looks like. I think that's the beauty. We've seen, we've seen 10 years on and off of you and you've made some choices and gotten to some new places that maybe you wouldn't have predicted 10 years ago. Well, that's for sure. I'd probably still be in my house in England, wouldn't I? It's so wild to think about that. It feels like such a long time ago. Doesn't it? I actually thought about that now when I came here and to New York. I was like, my God, I used to live in New York when I was in my 20s. I was married nearly 18 years to, you know, German with the kids. And the way I look and am right now, it's so far. I'm like a cat. I've

had nine bloody lives. And I, you know, I don't know which one I prefer. I love all of them. It's like, wow, life is incredible. Yeah. So when you think about like 10 years from now, do you think you'll still be in Dubai? I don't know. Sergio and I are building, you know, a small eco hotel in Bali. Maybe we'll be there with no shoes on. Maybe we'll do a little, we got to do like a little Bali, like spin off moment maybe.

Oh, yes. Well, I mean, you guys had, you go to Bali this season, right? We got, yes, we went to Bali. And I, Sergio and I are leaving in July because we start clear. our land. So we start building now. Wow. But yes, so Bali's become quite a big piece of my life. It was actually completely by accident that we ended up in Bali

on, I didn't know. And I hadn't quite finished, we hadn't sort of bought the land yet. So, you know, Sergio did it. It's his project. And I haven't even seen the land. So I'm going there now to finally stand on it and see it. Well, I can't wait to see that unfold on social media. I'm sure it'll be entertaining.

There you go. I won't be wearing my Chanel. Okay, probably for the best in the, in the middle of the jungle. But Caroline, congratulations on the new season on everything you have going on. It's great to catch up with you. Of course. Everybody watched Real House House of Dubai, Tuesday nights on Bravo, and you can watch it on Peacock too. And until next time, be cool. Don't be all like uncool. Don't be uncool. Mentioned at all is produced by Dylan Hafer, Sean Kilby, Jorge Morales Pico, and Rebecca Sousa McCat. Editing by Jorge Morales Pico. Social media by Dylan Hafer, guest booking by Dylan Hafer and Ali Friedlander. Be sure to follow at Bravo by Betcha

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