Mention It All - Bethenny’s Reckoning With Herself (RHONY)

Episode Date: October 2, 2023

To kick off the week, Dylan catches up with the RHONY ladies upon their return from Anguilla, and questions whether Sai’s dismissal of Jessel is a soft launch of her leaving the show. Earlier, he shares the latest on Kyle and Mauricio’s relationship status (if anyone cares). To finish things off, he unpacks Bethenny’s reality reckoning update, and why it’s not our problem anymore. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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See Store Online for details. Betches Media presents. Ha ha, laugh, funny. Mention It All, a Bravo by Betches podcast. We don't say that, but now we said it. With me, Dylan Hafer. We're going to check me, though. Hey, everyone.

Welcome back to the Mention It All podcast. I am Dylan Hafer, and it is a new week, and we, boy, do we have a lot to talk about today. We're going to be talking about Roney. I don't think I ever really talked about last week's episode, so we've got a little bit of catch-up to do there. We've got some reality. reckoning updates from the one and only Bethany Frankel. But first, a couple bits of news. Did you all see who's on the cover of this week's Woman's World magazine?

That's right. It is Soapstar and R-H-O-B-H-O-B-Hs, Eileen Davidson. She's sharing her secrets to Feeling Great at 64. This magazine cover, if you have not seen, head to at Eileen Davidson official on Instagram right now. Because it is the most chaotic thing you've seen in a while. So Eileen is looking great. You know, she feels great at 64.

She also looks great at 64. I would not have guessed she was 64 years old. That makes me feel old. But more prominent than Eileen Davidson's face on this magazine cover is the headline, soup off 14 pounds this week. Speeds weight loss by 691%. It just takes one big pop. of this Superman broth made with surprising common ingredients.

Carol McLean, 73, lost 107 pounds and reversed pre-diabetes. Quote, you're never too old to change your life. This is all text that I am reading from the cover, and it is so rude to me. So Eileen's face is nicely situated in the upper right corner of this cover. But this picture and quote and blurb about Carol McLean, 73, losing 107 pounds by souping off her weight is covering up all of Eileen's body. There's also, there's so much happening on this cover. We get news.

Gently pressing the right nerves does it. 20 seconds to stress free. We get box breathing trick works magic. Quote, how I cured my long COVID. Online beauty influencers are raving about $10 fake Botox. How to stop caring about. haters. Secret to bully proof. Okay, first of all, all of these things sound like Jen Shaw phone scams that would be, you know, stealing money from elderly people. But also, what is the wording of

these sentences? In all caps, we have secret to bully proof. How to stop caring about haters. What is to bully proof? I just, it is wild. We also have free fun. No cost ways to stream and order food. Please tell me. I'm spending way too much money on my delivery apps these days. And then at the bottom, quick and delicious, oh so cheesy casseroles and creamy treats. There is just so much happening. And I really wish the focus was more on our sweet dear Eileen Davidson. But good for her. She's the cover girl. The clip over the weekend was going around of years ago when Teddy Mellencamp joined Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Sarah Paulson was complaining about it on a red carpet where she's like, where is Eileen? And who's the new girl? Because I love Eileen. And where did she go?

And she's right here. She's on Woman's World Magazine along with souping off 14 pounds. I'm happy for her. In other Beverly Hills news, though, we're still waiting on a new season trailer. It looks like it's going to be coming out the first week of November along with Potomac. But we do have a bit of news because in the past week, in separate TMZ interviews, both Kyle and Maricio have confirmed that they are, in fact, separated. This has been the stupidest, most protracted, unnecessary rollout of a maybe breakup that I can remember. Because it just, months ago now, there was this report that they were separated, and then Kyle did her whole denial of, you know, we're not getting divorced, which nobody ever said that they were.

And then they're still living together. And then maybe they're back together. But then what's happening with Morgan Wade? And also Mauricio's going on dancing with the stars, which feels, I don't know, midlife crisis-y for him. Suffice to say, it's been unclear what's been happening with them the last couple months. And they have, Kyle at least, has seemed to want to kind of continue to play coy about what the actual staff. of their relationship is. But finally, last week, Maricio said on camera that they are separated. And then just today I saw the video at LAX, of course, always papped at the airport. Kyle confirming that they are separated currently.

Look, I'm sure we'll see this play out in some form on this season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. And I hope, I hope, I hope, I hope that they managed to make it interesting. But so far, it's just, it's not giving. this is a breakup, you know, a maybe possible potential breakup. I don't know. Who knows? This should be like earth-shattering news. And the way that it is being rolled out to us, it's like, it's like one of those iPhone updates where it keeps sending you reminders.

But it's like iOS 15.2.3 and you're looking at the thing. And it's like, oh. bug fixes, security update, some technological thing that doesn't, that you don't understand. There's no cool feature. There's no new app that you're going to get. It's like, this is a breakup where it's just like, yeah, I guess, you know, update it while I'm asleep. 2 to 4 a.m. Well, it's plugged into power.

I'll wake up. I won't notice that anything is different. And now that we know Kyle and Maricio are broken up, I feel nothing. I feel the same. God, I really hope this season of Beverly Hills is good. The Potomac trailer looks spicy. We have eight Housewives in Potomac this season. Only the third time in Housewives history that there have been eight full-time women on a cast after last season of Beverly Hills and season seven.

I believe in it. Season 709. I don't know. One of those seasons of Roney. There's not a lot of Mia in the trailer. There's not a lot of Candace in the trailer. there's plenty of Robin and Juan. If that's your

if that's your conflict of choice, it looks like you'll be getting fed. I don't know. Potomac last season was one of those seasons where it wasn't a bad season, but it wasn't their best, and it felt like we were kind of searching

for the best version of what it could be. And so I hope that this year they have managed to capture that a little bit more, But either way, I'm very excited. It sounds like we're also hopefully going to be getting news about Miami soon. I mean, it's October now. We're barreling toward the end of the year. BravoCon starts a month from tomorrow.

So we're going to need some announcements because I don't want to go to a BravoCon panel where these women can't fucking talk about anything. I don't want to be teased about, oh, we're feeling, things are good. There's drama. the new girl who's the new girl it's like tell me who the new girl is show me the trailer give me the premiere date send me the screener so i can watch it ahead like we need the information because if i'm if i'm going to Vegas i am i am going to Vegas either way um i will be there and i will i will be there with bells on i'll be happy either way but like tell us what's happening

so we can have some context and where is dubai where is dubai because The Real Houseways of Dubai, season one last year, premiered on June 1st. So now we are not just a year in the future. We are one year and, what is it, six, seven, eight, nine, four months. 16 months it's been since Dubai premiered. And there is not a, not a word. They've filmed in the past tense, I think. It seems like they must have been done for a while.

the thing is, I don't even care that much about Dubai. And that's why this is so puzzling to me that this is a show that was received, I would say, moderately well at best and probably realistically more kind of shrugishly. I would say the reception was kind of like, okay, it's not the worst thing I've ever seen, but I'm not obsessed. I'm not clamoring for more. And so when you decide to make a second season of a show like that and to keep, I believe, five out of six of the housewives,

you know, RAP Nina Ali's career on Bravo, long may we remember, you're dealing with a loss of momentum that I think in this case is going to be really tough to combat unless this second season ends up being really something wild and something special and sort of a can't miss thing, I think a lot of people that were like, oh yeah, Dubai was fun enough. Like, I'm, you know, I'll watch a second season. I feel like the trailer's going to come out and people are going to be like, oh, I forgot this

existed. And we're going to have Salt Lake, which is really good. And Beverly Hills, which I'm going to watch, you know, whether it's. it's good or not. And Miami is probably going to be really good. And Potomac, those girls always deliver. Oh, and then Dubai is going to be on. I think there are going to be a lot of people who are like, yeah.

I'm watching what, four or five Bravo shows a week. I don't know if Dubai is going to make it in that rotation. And last season, I'm pretty sure their time slot was the same night as Beverly Hills, which is, I get the strategy there, but then it's tough because if people, you know, if I'm only talking about one show, I mean, be fucking for real. So, Dubai, what's, what's happening? We got to get some updates there or else I just, the moment is passing. So good, so good. Everything you want for summer is at Nordstrom rack stores now and up to 60% off. Stock up and save on the brands you love like Vince, Sam Edelman.

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Work your magic. Speaking of Housewives shows that we do know what's happening with, Roney is airing every Sunday night. And so let's talk about it. The women this week are back from their trip in Inguila. Overall, I thought it was a decent trip. I thought it was interesting enough. They did put in the effort to get some conflict going.

I don't think it was one of the best, spiciest housewives trips we've ever had, but also that's not really the vibe of this season of Roney, and that's okay. I think overall this season has been a good kind of proving ground for this concept, and I think the group of women has largely done a good job of sort of carrying the ball. I think, and this from what I see online, is not an unpopular opinion.

I think sigh is falling flat a little bit, which makes me sad. But, you know, there's a lot of sigh this episode. We get a solo scene with her and her daughter who wants to do acting and desperately wants an agent. Great. I mean, I've been, as you know, I've been rewatching season one of Roney. It's very reminiscent of Ramona and Avery. And, you know, respectfully, it doesn't hit the same now. But we also get this scene with Sai and Jessel, which I guess they have big beef to squash after the trip to Anguila.

But it's also kind of like, do they have big beef to squash? Like, the whole thing with Jessel is that Aaron and Sondwana. I feel like Jessel has this tendency to sort of paint with a broad brush when she's just, you know, describing things that have happened to her and has a tendency to veer toward sort of comparison and always having a matching story for somebody's difficult experience that they've gone through. And I feel like we all have encountered people like this, whether or not they're, you know, really someone, someone you're, becoming friends with or allowing into your life is probably depends on how willing you are to put up with bullshit to a certain degree. But I do think that there is something there in the idea that

Jessel is somebody who has, I don't want to say she's a liar, but I would say maybe she has a squishy relationship with solid facts. That there's a little bit of, God, I hate to use this term because it because of what it carries with it. But it's a little bit of like alternative facts, idas, where it's like, oh, well, you know, I wasn't rich. Or like, my parents didn't help me. And I think I don't want to go too hard on Jessel because I think everything that she's saying is true to her. In the world that she lives in, in time and space and perhaps delusion, everything that she's saying is honest. And I think that the women, some of the women get that.

I think that like Jenna and Bryn especially, like, I think they recognize that like Jessel's kind of harmless. Like she isn't somebody who's out here trying to negate somebody else's experience or trying to tear somebody else down. she just has this natural tendency of seeing herself in everybody's experience, especially when it kind of, you know, makes her own journey seem more, I don't know, struggle-laden or impressive in a way or inspirational that she's like, well, yeah, you know, my parents had this, and then I was with my uncle and he had, he was an alcoholic, and I feel so bad. And you sort of, I think that the tough thing with her is that when you are trying to bond with

somebody like that on a deeper level and have a real connection with them, it's really difficult to get through that, you know, squishy layer of goo that surrounds the real facts. And so, you know, if you decide that you want to be close with that person, you either have to just accept that they are always kind of going to be doing that annoying thing where they're like, oh, yeah, that kind of happened to me too. And then they tell the story and you're like, that's not the same, it's not similar to the story I told. Or you have to, I don't know, get like really pick apart that person's whole psyche, which

let's be honest, none of these women are in a place with Jessel where they're like going to do that work with her. So I think for Sai, she kind of is getting to the point where she is like, oh, yeah, I don't actually know if I like give a fuck that much about what's happening beneath the surface with Jessel. So she apologizes to her for what happened in Inglah. She's like, I'm sorry if it made you feel like I was comparing. And Cy's just like, okay, yeah, I don't, I don't really care. but then Jessel, because she is, because she has this urge to be on the same page with everyone, she can't compute the fact that Sye is just like respectfully bowing out of this whole dynamic. So then she comes up with another story.

And I say, I don't mean that she's like inventing a story. I mean that she like pulls it out of the hat. And it's like, well, you know, I wasn't comparing with your mom. But I just want you to understand this thing with my uncle. And sigh, uh, sigh decides to leave the lunch, which, considering the fact that Jocelyn was 41 minutes late to her own lunch, I,

I don't begrudge her that. I think that this, we are seeing a moment in this friendship and maybe within this cast where we've had, you know, 10 episodes or whatever of everybody kind of, putting in the group effort to become a friend group. And I think we're naturally getting to a point where there are certain, you know, one-on-one dynamics within this group that just don't really have mileage as friendships, as relationships, as, you know, whatever, moving forward.

And I think that's where it's going to be a really interesting question of what does this cast look like next season? Because I think, like I said, sigh has kind of been falling flat for a lot of people. And if she's, if her reaction to Jessel is to kind of just put up the like, I don't give a fuck white flag and retreat from the friendship, that's also not really, it's not providing anything to work with for a potential next season. Like if her, if she leaves the reunion in a place with Jessel where it's like, yeah, I think

we tried. And I'm just like, I don't really care. next season, ideally, would be the time when you're like, so Jessel and I are meeting and we decided to put aside her differences and work through our whatever. Whereas if she's like not in a place of wanting to do that, what is there to watch? Like some, one of the reasons that Salt Lake I think is working so well this season is because it does feel like everyone has sort of mutually agreed to like come back to the table and at least say that they want to work through their stuff. And, you know, it's like union negotiations. Like maybe,

maybe Meredith isn't actually willing to talk through any of Lisa Barlow's deal points, but at the very least, there's going to be a conversation. And the cameras are going to be there to film it. And I think that's going to be the question going into next season is like, we got to get people in the room who are willing to talk. And I don't know if, I don't know if Si is really going to be that person. The thing, though, with this episode is that, Jessel and Pavit have their big staycation, you know, let's have sex again after two years night. And we have been working up this whole season to when this is going to happen. And Jessel's talking about it and Pavit's talking about it and all the women are talking about it and all the men are talking about it.

And then do you know what happens when they have their staycation at the Ritz Carlton Nomad? and Jessel buys her crotchless panties and they go to a Michelin Star restaurant? We don't get to see it at all. I'm sorry. This is a grievous sin on the behalf of production. I don't know if Jessel told them they weren't allowed to film. I don't know if this was, if they planned it on their day off. I don't know what happened behind the scenes.

I would like some answers. But I'm sorry, if you want me to care for three months about a storyline of a woman not fucking her husband, we need to be in the room when she fucks her husband. Not, I mean, not like during the act itself, which we don't even technically know if it happened. Sye doesn't think it did because we get very few details. Jassel's like, well, you know, it took me like 20 minutes to loosen up. It's like, okay. And then what?

Pavit's not canceling his 24-hour trip to Vietnam. So what's happening there? I just, there are certain things happening this season where it's like, I want to be really into this. And then you're pulling back in a way that makes it hard. You can't tease something for 11 episodes and then have it be one iPhone video for five seconds of like a freshly made bed that clearly nobody's been fucking in. I just think it's like what we should have gotten, we got Uber in the bathtub this episode, which we didn't even, wasn't even

relevant to the plot, but we couldn't get Jessel in the bathtub with Pavit. They should have had a full Meredith and Seth conversation in the bathtub. This I feel strongly about. I just, I think it's weird. I think it's weird that they teased this so much and then didn't give us the payoff. That is, that is frustrating to me. You know, otherwise, Pavitt says, I've been paying this married with kids tax for about two years now, so it's about time I get my refund. I don't know if I like that. It's, those two.

I will never, I'll just never quite understand. Probably the standout scene of the episode for me is seeing Jenna and Bryn, at a lesbian bar together, which we get some outstanding transition music. They're really taking cues from selling sunset here. We go straight from Jessel and Pavit at breakfast where she's, you know, chiding him for asking for spicy chicken and waffles because it's a French restaurant. And then we transition into the lesbian bar with this song that's like, we don't need no sleep because the party don't stop.

So put your hands on me and turn me on, turn me up. Where do they find this stuff? I don't, this doesn't, it doesn't really go with the, the like, cool, chic downtown vibes of this season of Roney. I got to say that, the, you know, grocery store pop music doesn't quite seem like what Jenna Lyons would curate for her big lesbian bar scene. But, you know, besides. I'm really enjoying it. We get to see Brin kind of playing wingwoman. I like that Brin is like, I want to make out with the girl.

This is so fun. Let me, you know, let's talk. Come here. Show me your tattoo. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And Jenna's just like, oh, yeah, this is great because Brin is so obviously straight. And I'm just like getting all the attention. Like, that's, that's correct.

Like, Brin is doing a great job. I love Bryn and Jenna's little blossoming friendship. And I would like to explain. explore that further next season and I hope we get a chance to. That's Rony. We've still got a few weeks to go this season. We did get the reunion looks. Everybody up in arms about Jenna Lions wearing jeans to the reunion. I kind of say it's not a surprise. I think she looks fine. It is what it is. I don't really. Geno Lions can do whatever she wants. Good sleep is everything. That's why Ali's science back support is made with a blend of

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production companies that work on their shows about how they were strengthening protocols about safety and just kind of like workplace types of things. So some of the stuff that this includes was there's going to be an enhanced alcohol training for cast and crew members and better guidelines about, you know, when people are going to stop being served and how to, you know, kind of handle stuff in environments around alcohol, which obviously is a huge thing, particularly on below deck we have seen recently. There's going to be increased psychological support during and after production of shows. Apparently, it's already been a policy that before production on a season, everybody meets

with a psychologist. And now there are going to be increased resources for that, both during production and afterward, including psychological support through the duration of the airing of the show, which I think is probably a big change. change. I mean, if you think about a lot of these shows, they're being aired months, sometimes even over a year after they've been shot. So that's a pretty long period of time. And I think it's, it's a great thing that a lot of these women are, you know, people, it's not just women, because it's not just housewives. But they might film a show in a bubble and think, oh, yeah, I'm totally fine.

And then when the episodes are airing on TV, they could be getting, first of all, they're seeing the people, seeing scenes they didn't know about, confessional interviews they didn't know about, and also the social media aspect of it, the publicity aspect of it. People can have a completely different experience filming the show versus when the show is airing. So I think that's important. Also, they noted that there is going to be on set psychological support during reunion tapings. This seems like a point that is kind of directly based on what Rachel said about the Vanderpump Rules Reunion, where she, you know, alleged. that she was promised that there would be basically that support on set and then it was taken away from her. Not great if that's what happened. There's going to be increased communication between NBC Universal and production companies during the production of shows, including some more HR presence. I'm paraphrasing these bullet points. There's more specifics.

There will be increased consequences for physical violence on set. And also they made it clear that confidentiality agreements or NDAs that people working on these shows sign are not applicable to reporting unlawful behavior that happens. So that was something Bethany had talked about, NDAs that people are forced to sign. And they're clarifying or, you know, I don't know if this is a change or just a clarification, that if something illegal is happening, that whatever confidentiality agreements they have don't preclude you from reporting those things. honestly, it's a lot. I think that this is probably not 100% of the way there in terms of things that should be changed or should be looked into changing. But there's a lot of stuff there.

It's a lot of good stuff and I think it needs to be followed through on. But Bethany posted on Instagram this three slide text statement, kind of an update on the reality reckoning and how she feels and what's happening. I'm not going to read the whole thing. I've highlighted some portions that I think are interesting, but she clearly is not satisfied with where this is going. One of the things she says is a letter about an onset psychologist and a reduction of alcohol consumption is a nice step,

but it won't suffice. We peddle our wares and answer provocative polls and negative questions designed to tear each other down, setting a bad example for women and children. So she clearly feels like the individual steps forward that are talked about in this note and maybe other places are good, you know, correct decisions. But this note makes clear that her real issue kind of stems from the broader overarching concept of what these shows are. And to be honest, I don't, I think this has shifted from what she was talking about at first was the idea of a reality union and, you know, putting things in place so that people aren't exploited and they know what they're getting into. And obviously pay structures and residuals and stuff like that is a whole separate can of worms from the kind of onset conditions.

But it does seem now like Bethany has come to. the realization that she has more of an existential problem with what this all means. She says to be successful in reality TV, you must kill or be killed. To not get dirty is to get fired. Someone is winning and someone is losing in this zero-sum game where people like myself get rich and the less strategic go broke or get canceled. I was good at the game. So what does that say about me?

I was broken desperate and wanted it so badly. My one-liners and quick wit crafted and honed from a dysfunctional childhood. That's very jessel to just throw that in there. Often at others' expense shot me through the ranks of this toxic cesspool. This medium praise on and profits from the emotionally flawed and damaged. She says that it creates a society at large, glorifying women, trashing each other for profit. She wanted to be something and helped create the genre,

paving the road for those behind her. And now maybe she is biting the hand that fed her, but perhaps that hand deserves to be bitten. We have fed the machine ratings, add dollars, catchphrases, and content. We get filthy and they get filthy rich. There's a lot here. And I think that she is going through a thought process that is very understandable. And I think that a lot of the ideas are really valid. But I think that she is, it feels like she's getting stuck in this mental idea that it has to be this way for this to exist at all.

The idea that it's a zero-sum game and you must kill or be killed, I think that there are a lot of instances where that hasn't really been the case. I mean, I don't doubt for a second that there are people who have gone on these shows and really regretted it or really, you know, had, you know, lost financial opportunities or things have really gone badly for them. I mean, would Jen Shab be in prison if she hadn't gone on a TV show? No one will ever know. But I just, I don't think that it's as black and white as Bethany now seems to think that it is. I mean, think of somebody like Cynthia Bailey, for example. She was on Real Housewives of Atlanta for what, 10, 11 seasons. She's been through lots of ups and downs.

She has, you know, had friendships come and go. She has had marriages come and go. But I don't really think that Cynthia Bailey was ever in a kill or be killed position. She was not somebody on the show who was shooting bombs at people and then walking away from the wreckage of others with her own pockets lined. I think that this is something where I get why Bethany feels maybe dirty about some of the things that she... I mean, the whole situation with Luanne has come up a lot about, you know, that whole, how that went down. I think there are other situations where Bethany's, you know, you could question Bethany's actions.

but I think that maybe she's applying her own experience pretty generally to everybody who does these shows. And I'm just not sure that that's quite accurate. And, you know, Bethany says that she wants to lead by example and evolve for herself and her daughter and that she wants to protect her daughter from false beauty ideals and images. And she says the responsibility of parenting falls on the parent, not the public. And I think that this is sort of telling. And it feels like Bethany is kind of grappling with the real meaning of what she participated in and how she, you know, how she participated in it and how she profited from it and how she, you know, related to it.

And I think that this is, it's probably something she needs to go through. but I don't know that we all need to go through it with her. Like, I, it seems like she is a great mom to Bryn. I hope that she feels like she's a great mom to Bryn and that she's, you know, protecting our kids from false beauty ideals is a wonderful goal. But I don't think that that goal is equal to like cancel housewives. And obviously I'm saying this as somebody who likes having my, you know, dumb little shows to watch every week.

But I just think that it feels like Bethany is now kind of in a place where this has gotten a little more personal and a little less, a little less about everybody else. And I hope that she can kind of maybe take a step back and deal with that part on her own. But, you know, what I will say is that a couple months ago when we were. getting union organizer Barbie Bethany, myself and others were wondering kind of how long she would stick with that stick with that line of thinking after, you know, hot strike summer had ended and it's now October 2nd.

And it doesn't really seem like Bethany is, is pulling for that union anymore. She's kind of, she's like, she's turned the lens inward. And that's fine. but also, you know, I don't know how that's going to help other people get paid more and other people get whatever. So I think the prediction of Bethany kind of only giving a shit about the reality union for a few weeks while it was trending. Seems to have panned out. Otherwise, I hope that she does well with this for herself.

But that's all for today. Thanks, everyone for listening. Don't forget to rate, review, and follow the show wherever you listen. You can follow us on Instagram at Bravo by Betches. time, be cool. Don't be all like uncool. Mentioned at all is produced by Dylan Hafer, Sean Kilby, Jorge Morales Pico, and Rebecca Sousa McCat. Editing by Horace Picoe. Social media by Dylan Hafer. Guest Booking by Ali Friedlander. Be sure to follow at Bravo by Betches on Instagram and Twitter.

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