Mention It All - RHONJ (Kidz Bop Version)

Episode Date: July 15, 2024

After an eventful weekend in politics, Dylan has to start by sharing the most unhinged post from a former Real Housewife. Then, he turns his attention to the equally as toxic land of New Jersey. After a week off, Jen and Danielle are still resisting the urge to throw hands (barely), while Teresa once again plugs her now-nonexistent podcast. Elsewhere in the cast, Margaret and Dolores bury the hatchet, and Jackie’s attempts to stay relevant are flagging. Later, Dylan shares which Bravoleb he would share a cider this week, sponsored by Angry Orchard Hard Cider. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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See Home Depot.com slash price match for details. Betches Media presents. Ha ha, laugh, funny. Mention It All, a Bravo by Betches podcast. We don't say that, but now we said it. With me, Dylan Hafer. We're going to check me, though. Hey, everyone.

Welcome back to the Mention at All podcast. Wow, what a weekend it was. We have a new episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey to talk about after they took a week off last week. And it's a little bit of a juicy episode. You know, we've got some stuff to talk about. Jennifer was on Watch What Happens Live, which was something I wasn't sure we were going to see this season. I think I've talked about the kind of rumblings that she had been sort of pre-fired from being on Housewives and was kind of being benched from doing press this

season. But they got her in the clubhouse. So we'll talk a little bit about that. Obviously, the biggest thing that happened over the weekend was this Donald Trump shooting situation, which I don't really want to talk about. And I normally wouldn't. But we just have to, I have to bring up some posts. that we saw over the weekend on social media. You know, Larsa Pippen posting a little Donald Trump 2024 in her stories. Surprising, not particularly. Was it what I wanted to see on a Saturday morning or a Sunday morning or whatever the

fuck day? I don't know when anything happened. But the actual craziest thing that I saw on social media this weekend was from one, Brandy Redmond, our former Real Housewife of Dallas. I know it feels like you got to dig back in the brain. ways to get to Dallas at this point. Like, just a few years ago, we were all watching this show.

Brandy, of course, an OG of Real Housewives of Dallas, and this thing that she posted. So it is a, it's a photo, or perhaps like a, it looks like when you put a photo into one of those filters that makes it look like a painting a little bit of

Donald Trump, of former president, and behind him, standing behind him, like, it looks like Donald Trump would be sitting down and standing behind him is Jesus Christ. A sort of hazy, sort of, like, if you turned the opacity down to like 50%, like, Jesus wrapped in a, in a white robe, and he's putting his hands on the shoulders of Donald Trump, you know, eyes closed, looking down. And then right behind Jesus is an American flag, which feels, you know, a bit anachronistic.

I don't think that Jesus lived in the time of the American flag, but, you know, it is what it is. It's a very abstract, you know, artistic creation. And then over this image of Jesus Christ and Donald Trump, in some ugly font that is like three different sizes that is actually covering up Donald Trump's face. I don't know. The formatting here is a little strange. All the forces of darkness cannot stop what God has ordained, Isaiah 1427. And then the caption of this is heart emoji, prayer hands emoji, hashtag Trump 2024, my president that stands on the truth and the word of God, and he's good at golf.

Okay sign emoji. Look, this is not a podcast about politics. This is not a podcast about what's happening in the news. You know, usually, usually I would not even bring up what happened over the weekend. this post sent me into a fucking spiral because there's a big difference between knowing either in your head or based on some evidence that somebody is like, you know, probably leaning a certain way politically that I wouldn't agree with. And look, I've been watching Housewives for a long time. I've talked to a lot of these people. I've spent time with some of them. And I know that we don't all have the same views. And sometimes you don't. just kind of have to like, la, la, la, la, la. That's not what we're talking about, so it's okay.

But this is not just like, oh, yeah, I voted for Republicans before because, you know, like Brandy Redmond voting for Republicans, like forked found in kitchen, I'm not, color me not shocked here. But just this image of Jesus Christ with his hands on the shoulders of Donald Trump, it just is, it's really something. And I don't know. Wow. Just what a thing to see when you're just scrolling on Instagram on a Sunday morning, right? But anyway, let's go to greener pastures where things aren't toxic at all. And that's the real houseways of New Jersey, where everything is lovely and everyone gets along. It's a low bar, but we're back in New Jersey. And things in the friend group are, let's just say, not headed in a great direction. And this week is the first time where it feels like, we're sort of rounding the bend into the last part of this season and into the place where seemingly clearly they are not really able to make progress with the friend group.

And Dolores is the one who sort of is starting to call this out and to be like, what's going on with this group? We can't even be, we can't even call it. We got the bougie kids launch party and it's a fucking mess. We got, you know, now Jen Fessler and Rachel are, you know, can't get along. And now we got the Danielle and the Jennifer. And that's so, that's, they can't get along. And then we got Margaret and Melissa.

Like, Dolores is kind of sounding the alarm of like, guys, can we get it the fuck together? Because if we can't, we're running out of a room here. We're running out of like options of how this is going to go, of how we're going to progress as a group. And we know in the finale that it's her kind of, I don't know, come to Jesus like showdown meeting at Rail's Steakhouse that really goes left and is, you know, sort of maybe the reason that we're not having a reunion this season. And it feels like this was the first week where we're kind of like things are starting to take shape that are going to head in that direction.

And look, there's still a lot to talk about. There's still a lot going on. But just knowing that it's like, okay, so we're, this is episode 10, knowing Jersey, they're probably not getting more than like 15 episodes and we're running out of time to sort of to make progress. The one place where there is progress this week, I feel like, is with Dolores and Margaret

because surprise, surprise, there are two adults who can like sit down and have a conversation and when something is bothering Dolores, she's like going to bring it up and then they're going to squash it for the most part. So, you know, Dolores is feeling a little bit weird after, you know, the text attack on Jackie from Margaret and then Jackie throwing out, oh,

she says horrendous things about you and Paul. You should hear what she says. And so obviously, Dolores is like, in the moment, she was mad at Jackie for calling her a slob. But then she's like, okay, wait, I do still need to figure out what was happening with Margaret. Because, like, if she's saying horrendous things about me and Polly behind the scenes, we can't just let that slide. And so Margaret says that really. the only thing that she has said about Polly stems from the night of the reunion last season,

or according to how we speak on the show, the night in New York, where Dolores went to dinner after the reunion taping, which was obviously superheated. She went to dinner with Teresa and Louis and Polly. And, you know, Margaret, I think was a little bit, I think it stung a little bit that after that sort of knock down, dragout reunion where Teresa had, you know, according to her down and said all these awful things and Louis was creepy and XYZ, then Dolores was still going to go out to dinner with them. So Margaret said that basically the reason they went to dinner with them was because Polly likes Teresa more than he likes Margaret. And she's like, that's, basically, that's pretty much all I said. You know, it is, yeah.

But then a minute later, she's like, well, I also said that if you were still with David, that wouldn't have happened. And Dolores is like, bitch, what? Why would you say that? First of all, I'm not with David, so stop it. But also, if I was with David, yeah, he wouldn't have gone to dinner with Teresa because he also wouldn't have gone to dinner with me. Like the whole problem with David was that he was like never fucking around and he wouldn't commit to anything. So she's like, yeah, it wouldn't have happened. cut it out.

But I think that the thing with Margaret and Dolores that I respect about their relationship with each other is that obviously like Margaret is a shit talker and Dolores knows this. And Dolores can take a step back and say, look, I know that Margaret's a shit talker. I've always known that. This is not new information for me. She is telling me a couple of things that she said that she knew I wouldn't like. and we're smoothing that over. And on the whole, all things considered, she's been a pretty good friend to me.

So at the end of the day, it's not worth having a blow-up argument, getting physical, you know, cutting each other out of their lives. It's just not that deep. And so I like that in this group that is so fractured and polarized and toxic that at least we have these two who are able to be like, I don't love that you said that. Don't do it again. But, you know, at the end of the day, we're okay. It was just nice because you know that we're not seeing a lot of conversations like that.

I did like seeing at the beginning of the episode, this is kind of a throwaway. But Melissa's mom, Donna, Donna Marco, she's 75. She's dating again. She has been twice widowed, which is crazy to think about. Just like imagining going through that in your life and feeling like, feeling like, like you're in your 70s and you're sort of starting over again and just like deciding to put yourself back out there. God, I can't imagine. She looks great though. I always like seeing Melissa's family. Some people have like a weird chip on their shoulder with Melissa's family where they're like,

ah, they're thirsty, they're blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I have kind of on the contrary, always found that I feel like they are around exactly as much as they're asked to be, you know, we get little glimpses here and there. You know, we see that. them maybe a few times a season. They're not having their own storylines. They're not, you know, playing it up for the cameras. Like, I, I like to see her sisters came in Lisa, you know, the, the wedding that Joe officiated a couple weeks ago. That was really nice to see. Like, it feels normal and natural. And I mean, on the flip side, we're now seeing Teresa spend more time with Louis family. And when we see them, I like that too. I like seeing these people have normal,

healthy relationships and, you know, loved ones and family members. And unfortunately, that's not going to happen with each other at this point. So it's like, I'm glad they're getting it somewhere. And I'm not mad about seeing it. Do I think that Melissa's sisters would make good housewives and should be on the show more? No. If we were ever going that direction, I think it would be problematic, but we're not. And I think people just, you know, some people just want to be like haters. So good, so good, so good. Everything you want for summer is at Nordstrom rack stores now and up to 60% off.

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But last week, or two weeks ago, it feels like it has been, every time a housewives show takes one week off, it feels like I haven't watched an episode in like a month and a half. Like the fact that Danielle's boozy kids relaunch, rebrand, whatever party was the most recent episode that we saw. And it was only two weeks ago, like 14 days between episodes. I'm like scraping the bottom of my brain to try and recall exactly what happened at that event. But thankfully, we get this conversation where Danielle is kind of downloading Nate on what happened at the event. And obviously, she's giving her spin on what happened with Teresa and Jennifer after the altercation. She's basically saying that, you know, naturally, Teresa was kind of defending Jen and that, you know, she says that she has her back. but she doesn't really go to bat for her in the way that she would for Jennifer.

And she's not going to stand up and say, like, my friend Danielle would never do something like that. So for you to say it, it's wrong. Like, I think that this is something that Danielle, you know, Daniel's not stupid. Like, I'm sure that she could have guessed this, that Teresa would kind of lean a little more into Jen's direction, just because they've been friends for so much longer than they've known Danielle. But it is kind of like, it's interesting to watch her in real time kind of be like, I'm not getting enough of this friendship from Teresa. So I might have to reconsider my options a little bit.

Because on a show like this to say, to know that you're friends with Teresa, Teresa who is objectively, she's number one on the call sheet for this show. She's the number one girl in the group. She always has been. She's the OG, whatever. Like her or not, it's true. To know that you have a friendship with her and that you kind of have her in your camp, and then you're going to kind of make a decision to move away from that, it is a big decision.

You know, Danielle is still only two seasons into being on this show. So I kind of understand for her why this is so complicated, even if she doesn't deep down care that much about her friendships with Teresa and Jen that have gone a different direction this season, just knowing that it's going to change her position in the group. I think she's smart in that way and she kind of is like, she's like exploring her options right now because obviously things with Jen are pretty much Dunzo for her. But with Teresa, I think there's a little bit more wiggle room.

And we see later in the episode that Teresa is, I think, trying to ride the fence a little bit with Jen and Danielle. Because at her podcast show, again, And put a dollar in the Namaste bitch's jar every time we've talked about that damn podcast this season that no longer exists. We've seen the merch every fucking episode. And this week we have the live show. It's her first live show. She's so excited.

She's like, Melissa Feaster came into my life a year ago. And she came to one of my events and we just hit it off right away. And I always say, she's the gun Melissa, not the evil bitch that my brother married. And it's so funny. the way that this franchise specifically, the relationship that they have with like fans and people in the community and like outside people, the way that she's describing Melissa Feaster,

how different is it from when Jackie once upon a time came to one of her book signings? And then the photos got circulated years later and it was like, she was a fan! It's like, okay, so this lady Melissa, who had another person, podcast for a long time, came to one of your events. And then all of a sudden, she's like, your podcast co-host that you're hitting it off with. It's like, yeah, like this woman

probably came to your event being like, my goal is to get a podcast with Teresa. And I'm sure that she said all the right things. And I'm sure that she's a great person, whatever. Clearly, a year later, things have gone sideways. And this podcast didn't, didn't make it out of its infancy. But it's nice to watch them have the show. You know, they're at, um, they're at, um, they're the cathedral, this venue is so strange. It's interesting in one episode to have Melissa and Teresa both having events because good for them, they both get pretty much the whole group to come to their events. So it's nice that things aren't so, so, so divided.

I mean, look, is Margaret going to Teresa's event? No. Is Teresa going to Melissa's event? Obviously not. Like, it's not like, we're not at 100% attendance here. But like, for the most part, you know, Dolores can. go to both. Danielle can go to both. Jennifer goes to both. Jennifer seems to still be, I guess, pretending to try to be friends with Melissa, though not before she like shades the whole idea of an

Envy fashion show and simultaneously brings up last season's cheating rumor about Melissa once again. Because she's like, this fashion show is happening. Obviously, okay, Envi is a boutique where they, you know, buy clothes from other companies and, you know, stock stuff at their boutique. And boutique fashion shows like this are a tenant, a central, a central pillar of Real Housewives of New Jersey. Going back a decade plus, do you know how much the posh fashion show contributed to our culture? Do you know all the moments we wouldn't have had, you know, pulling on Danielle's weave, we wouldn't have had a piece of shit, co-core home wrecker every day? the envy fashion show we've seen it before, for Jennifer to be like,

I just don't understand why you would have a fashion show when it's not your own fashion. Like, who's clothes are these? It's like, babe, I know that you want to get in a little dig at Melissa, but it's just not that complicated. It's a thing. We're 14 seasons into this show.

Don't act like you don't know that a New Jersey boutique is sometimes going to do a fashion show. And when there's cameras around, you know they're going to do. do a fashion show. But she notes specifically that there are no male models this time. And isn't that interesting? Because this guy that Melissa was supposedly making out what in the back of a car was a

model in one of the envy fashion shows before. So, hmm, no men this time, just girls. Jennifer is so funny. Like, I really think she thinks that she's like Hercule Poirot. Like, she's, like, cracked to the coach. She's like, I, she's like, I want to you, Melissa, you're not having male models. It's like, does Envy even sell men's clothes? Maybe they had male models at some point before, but like, it's just not that weird that there's only women in the envy fashion show.

It seems like a nice event, though. Like, for the most part, people are getting along. Marge and Jackie have another, another little tiff about Marge said that Jackie was a fame whore. And then Jackie was mad about that. It was like, well, you were saying that you were smarter than me and better than me and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. The two of them, it's so, it's so weird the way that their relationship has just fully deteriorated from the point where, like, a couple seasons ago, they were good friends who seemed to be very, like, compatible on like a personal level where it was like, even if, you know, like, they seemed to kind of like see the world in the same way, I feel. And, you know, they were on this show together. They, you know, got along for a long time.

And then now it's like the fact that they've gotten to this point where it's like, they can't even like step into the same event without just like being at each other's necks a little bit. It's strange because I don't even particularly care about their relationship. It just is kind of like, girls, please, come on. Like, go to your seats. Stop, like, arguing about this stuff that happened in fucking 2019. Nobody cares.

It does not, as much as the Jackie kind of flip-flop was teased before this season, it still doesn't even really feel like a central storyline. And I think that just speaks to how much Jackie's time has sort of come and gotten on this show, that it's like, even though she has something that on paper looks like a really promising storyline, this season, it still kind of just falls flat. And on, you know, on Watch What Happens Live last night, Jen was like, oh, well, I don't think it's fair to say that we were using Jackie. We just knew that it would kind of get to, we knew that it would kind of get to Melissa

Margaret if we were friends with her. And Andy's like, so you're using her. She was like, but she was using us too. So it was kind of like, it all worked out. And we love, we love having Jackie on our team. And it's like, right. So you're not really giving any sort of convincing performance that you're not using her. You're just saying that, like, we don't hate having her around, but also we wouldn't have her around if it wasn't strategic.

It's like, okay, we see you. Jackie also not getting, not getting sent a dress from envy to wear for the fashion show. It's just like, man, she can't stop catching these Ls. And the way it always happens where Mark is like, well, you know, then she said it's the dress and blah, blah, blah, blah. And Jackie's like, who's something you address? did you get a dress? She's like from envy. Just like the look on her face where she's realizing that it's another thing that she's been like not invited to or not included in or not put on the list.

It's like at a certain point, like you can keep hanging around if you want. But like this isn't it's not your house anymore. You're just like chilling by the pool waiting for somebody to tell you it's time to leave. I don't know. I mean, I guess it's a hard thing to say goodbye to on your own. Terbs. I don't begrudge her, not just, like, bowing out if they're saying you can still get paid to show up and get mic'd up and be on TV. But it's like, it's a little sad. But back to the Namaste Bitches live show at this cathedral venue, which apparently is appropriate because Teresa

at one point hated God because she went to jail and stuff, as we're always reminded. But then now she's trying to like get back good with God. And so doing the podcast show in a venue that is like a former church is really just helping God to connect with Teresa, I'm sure. Danielle at first isn't going to make it because she's doing this kids pop shoot with her kids. Danielle saying that she's become friendly with the PR team of kids pop is just something that is so perfect to me because it's like, Of course she has. This woman has been on TV for one year. Of course her daughter is going to be in a kids pop music video.

I would expect nothing less. But thankfully, the kids bot video wraps up early. So she, in fact, can make it to Teresa's live podcast show. This, of course, means that Jennifer and Danielle are going to be in the same place again. Their energy together is so interesting because obviously they like, it's like they hate each other's guts. They can't stop talking about it. But then they're like, I think they know that they, for their own good, for their security on the show, for their paycheck, whatever. They can't let it escalate to the place it did before at Teresa's Tulum party.

So they're like just, just barely keeping their distance where like Jen is talking shit about Danielle and retelling the story to this random woman. And Danielle literally like scoots behind her to go to her chair. and Jen like clocks her out of the corner of her eye but then just keeps talking she's like she's like yeah so then the evil bitch so like I said she was doing this and then there's this other moment where they're back in the green room and this is what's crazy to be is this last scene happens in a 10 minute break between the main podcast show and when Teresa has to go back out on stage for a Q&A so it's like not even after the event it's literally like intermittent mission and they're all sitting around this green room.

And they're talking about how Teresa would like them to come together to kind of like patch things up, to have a conversation, whatever. And they're both like, the answer's no. Respectfully, not going to happen. Danielle gets in a couple good digs. She says she's shocked that this cathedral venue didn't burn down with Jen in it. Just inspired stuff. And then Jen is mad, of course, now kind of similar to Danielle, actually, that Teresa is not being ride or die enough in her direction. And Teresa here, I think, is in a little bit of a lose-lose position because Teresa, we've established,

Teresa doesn't have that many people on her team. They've newly recruited Jackie, but like we've talked about, Jackie's value as a recruit seems to be diminishing by the day. they've got a little bit of Jen, a little bit of Dolores, but not in like a ride or die kind of way. Danielle was the third person on that team. And I get why Teresa doesn't want to just cut ties with Danielle and let her go. Because then she's just stuck on an island with Jen. And like, Jen's probably going to, you know, poison the drinking water. For Jen to be like, it's extremely hurtful to me that Teresa would even suggest that Danielle and I should have. some sort of conversation and try to patch things up. It's like, realistically, I think you're expecting a little too much.

I think Jen is expecting Teresa to just like burn the whole house down to be loyal to her. And it's like, that's not the position you're in. But anyway, the best moment of the episode, Teresa's going back out to go on stage for her Q&A. Danielle is leaving the room to. And as she opens the door to walk out, she looks down at Jennifer and she goes, by the way, you look like shit. The way that she waited to do it

until she's walking out the door and then just kind of offhandedly, by the way, you look like shit. It's like so mean, but so funny. And Jennifer, the word smith insult comic that she is,

it's just kind of wrong footage just a little bit. She goes, you too, clown. Like, that's kind of all she can get out. And then, And then we're, you know, we're off to the races again. Jennifer is like, I want to hit the bitch so bad. They're like just barely holding it together. They know that they're going to get like benched for the rest of the season if they throw hands again.

But God, they really just, they can't, they can't do it. They can't keep it together. And this is, this is kind of where Dolores is spiraling a little bit about the state of the group. And it doesn't seem like it's going to end well. We know it's not going to end well. But, you know, we're here for the ride anyway. But what an episode. We'll always have namaste bitches. even though we won't. We'll always have the envy fashion show. We'll always have Kids Pop.

If the PR team of KidsBop is listening to this and wants to do a little collab, hit me up because I feel like that could be fun. I haven't checked out KidsBop in a little bit. I wonder if they're doing like Chapel Rhone and Sabrina Carpenter these days. I bet they are. Anyway, so that's where we are with Jersey this week.

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It's that same angry orchard flavor you're used to, but just even crisper and lighter and perfect for a warm summer day. We all have that one friend who always picks the best, most crowd-pleasing beverage, no matter what. They're the kind of person who you want to share a drink with, a sort of influencer, a tastemaker, someone who just gets it. I'm going to talk about which Bravo Lab I'd like to crack open a cold one with on this segment. Who do you want to have a cider with this week? And this week, look, this might be. seem like a little bit of a chaotic choice. I don't know if she's everybody's cup of tea or cup of cider, as it may be, but I want to kick back and crack open a cold one with Kelly,

Coloren, Ben Simone. Because, look, Homegirl has been through it in the last month or so. As you probably know, she called off her wedding to her fiance Scott just a few days before it was set to take place because he wouldn't sign a pre-up, a power move if I've ever seen one. she, according to page six, has moved back into her famed apartment building that she's lived in for 30 years in Little Italy. And it was reported last year that when she was engaged to Scott, she had rented out her apartment that she owns in this building for a cool $28,500 a month. first of all, I can't even begin to wrap my mind around $28,500 a month. I know that I give off sort of an air of luxury and of, you know, refinement and taste. I personally am not in a position to pay $28,500 a month for my living situation. So this is me revealing that I have not

been subletting Kelly's apartment for the last year. But somebody has, and I'm sure they really like it and they are actually still in the apartment. So because her apartment is still being rented, Kelly has moved into another unit in the building. And not only does she live in this building and own in this building, but I'm sure you're aware of her booming real estate career, she is actually the unofficial commissioner and brokers specialist of this building 240 Center Street, which she has said on Instagram she's very proud of. And some of the most powerful humans in New York from Teddy Roosevelt to Calvin Klein have lived in this building. I would want nothing less for Kelly Clorin-Venstern and I would love to come over to her apartment in this historic iconic building and bring

some angry orchard hardsiders. I think that we would have a good time. And you know what? Not only would I want to talk about, you know, her life, how she's been doing, how she's, I'm sure, bouncing back from this marriage situation, if you will, I would love, love, love, love, love, to get her take on what's going on with Bethany and Luanne. I talked about it on a recent episode. Bethany and Luann's running in the Hamptons where they were posting these pictures together with Bethany's daughter. And then Luan talking to us weekly after and saying that she felt used that Bethany still has her blocked. Oh my God. The things I would do to hear Kelly Coloren Ben Simone's take on this whole situation. The tea would be hot. The cider would be cold and crisp.

And there's just nothing that I want more. Look, you might have been a little surprised with my choice at the beginning, but I think I got there. I think I explained it. So thank you again. to our sponsor, Angry Orchard. Don't get overwhelmed by too many options on your next pre-party drink run. Just pick Angry Orchard hard cider. Angry Orchard is made with real fruit, tastes amazing, and doesn't skimp on flavor. There's an Angry Orchard option for pretty much any type of hang. From semi-sweet to fruit forward to high ABV, they've got a little something for everyone. And you can find Angry Orchard near you by visiting Angry Orchard.com slash locations. Enter your city, state, or zip code. Select the product you want to find a voila.

That's Angry Orchard, A-M-G-R-Y-O-R-C-H-A-R-D dot com. Angry OrchardtC-R-R-Rchard. Please drink responsibly. Angry Orchard is a hard cider with other natural flavors. That's our episode for today. Thanks so much for listening, everyone. Don't forget to rate, review, and follow the show wherever you listen. You can follow us on Instagram at Bravo by Betches.

And until next time, be cool. Don't be all like uncool. Mention It All is produced by Dylan Hafer, Sean Kilby, Jorge Morales-Picot, and Rebecca Sous-M-Kat. Editing by Jorge Morales Picoe. Social media by Dylan Hafer. Guest booking by Dylan Hafer and Ali Friedlander. Be sure to follow at Bravo by Betches on Instagram and Twitter. Yamava Resort and Casino at San Manuel is California's number one entertainment destination for today's superstars.

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