Mention It All - RHONY Rewind Ep. 5: Careful, She Bites

Episode Date: September 8, 2023

Back for another week of RHONY reminiscing, Dylan starts with a chaotic story from the US Open, and how Ramona Singer could’ve gotten things done better. From there, he recaps an episode that features way too much of Jill’s dog, not enough group interaction, and just the right amount of Noel learning to break dance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Make every get-together chill. This Memorial Day, get up to an extra $1,000 off select top brand appliances like LG. Plus, get free delivery at the Home Depot. Tackle pool, towels, and camp laundry with a large capacity washer. And host and style with the fridge-serving craft ice, mini-craft ice, cube ice, and crushed ice. Shop appliance savings now through June 3rd at the Home Depot. Offer valid May 14th through June 3rd, US-only. Free delivery on appliance purchases of $998 or more.

See Store Online for details. Betches Media presents. Ha ha, laugh, funny. Mention It All. A Bravo by Betcha's podcast. We don't say that, but now we said it. With Dylan Hafer. Hey, everyone.

Welcome back to the Mention It All podcast. I'm Dylan Hafer, and it is episode five of our Rony Rewind. If you're new here, somehow just stumbling onto this, I am rewatching season one of Roney, recapping another episode every week. and we are five weeks in out of only eight episodes total, including a reunion. So we are, we're getting into the back half of the season. Our relationships are being solidified. I wish I could say there was a dizzying amount of drama.

But honestly, the pacing of this season is really something to behold. Of course, we'll get into more of all of that. I just want to make a little note first off the bat. I'm sorry about the state of my voice. I have been, you know, going through it a little bit with, you know, recovering from a cold, obviously recording, stuff like that. And then last night I was at the U.S. Open until 1 a.m. doing my patriotic duty of screaming my lungs off for Cocoa. Last night at the U.S. Open, it was the women's semifinals. And about an hour into the first match of two, there was a fossil fuel protest.

that broke out in the stands. There were three or four people who were yelling out something about fossil fuels, which, I mean, correct. We have a lot to fix about fossil fuels in the climate. But one of these protesters had super glued his bare feet to the cement stands of the stadium. So the other people he was with were, you know, quickly escorted out. I believe they were all arrested. This last guy was sitting there in this chair with his feet super glued to the ground

while a dozen plus NYPD medical people tournament security, whatever, spent like 45 minutes trying to figure out how to get this guy out of the stands. It was the match was stopped for almost an hour. hour. The players all left to the court. Everybody, my phone, my 5G cell service, whatever, wasn't working. So for like 45 minutes, all I could see what was going, I was like zooming it on my phone camera, like trying to use it like binoculars. And you know the thought that crossed my mind? They eventually got him out. They resumed play. You know, everything was great. It was a late night. I was just thinking, what if Ramona Singer had been there? What is a

What if Miss Ramona Karen Singer had marched her ass up to that section where he was sitting? She would have yanked those super glued feet off the ground herself. She'd be like, get out. I want to watch the match. Go. Karen and... Not Karen. Ramona and Jill could have gotten him out in five minutes.

I truly believe that. But the NYPD, you know, took a... better part of an hour. Rony, Rony, Rony. These ladies, Bethany's really going through it this week.

This is episode five, careful, she bites, which, you know, you might think is in reference to some feud

that's happening. No, it's actually about Jill's dog Ginger, who is somehow kind of the main focus of this episode. We have like

three or four different scenes of Jill talking about her dog seeking out professional help to get her dog better trained. The dog's eating too much real people food and, you know, too much protein, not enough carbs. He's gaining weight. As stairs up to the bed is, you know, codependent, doesn't like Allie.

Jill kind of likes the dog more than she likes Allie. That's kind of a coin toss situation. And of course, we get the, um, the iconic clip of Ginger just eagerly sucking on Jill's nostrils, which is really, I haven't seen that in context in a long time. Yeah, it's not great. It's not great. I don't really understand watching these early episodes. They have this thing that they tend to do of spending just a large amount of.

time in particular episodes on sort of these random personal asides. Like we see a lot of Avery's acting ambitions. We see a lot of, you know, I mean, Simon and Alex's school trajectory, I guess, is a valid storyline. But it's like a lot of just kind of like, why are we? spending so much time on this. I mean, I know that the game has changed a lot, but I think in a current season of housewives, if a housewife was having like dog obedience issues, I think that would be at most like one five minute scene. So I was, um, I was a little, uh, I was a little caught off

card by the amount of ginger that we got in this episode. But you know, good for her. She got her screen time. But I mean, the real angst that's happening within the cast is with Bethany, who is seemingly, mostly probably broken up with Jason. She meets Alex in Union Square at the beginning of the episode. And, you know, I guess they're supposed to be just shopping and chit-chatting. But Bethany is like in a huff. She's like, I'm in the midst of a breakdown. But let me hear about your kids in help first. You know, blah, blah, blah, blah.

You know, I just got off the one. I was walking around. and we basically just broke up and Alex is like, yeah, I could tell that Bethany wasn't doing great. Like, God, it is, it's tough. This is, it really makes it clear how little these women actually know each other because it's like, you know, Bethany's kind of explaining like Jason, you know, says that he wants the same things as, her, like the marriage, the babies, the whatever, but then he won't commit to any kind of timeline. Bethany's very focused on her timeline. And, you know, I think, obviously these are, like, things that makes sense to talk about, but it doesn't really feel like she and Alex have any

kind of actual foundation of sharing things about their lives with each other. Case in point, later, Simon calls Bethany and is like, hey, I'm doing this thing for Alex on a boat. Do you want to come? And it seems like he's inviting Bethany more because he knows Bethany is going through it than because he actually wants Bethany to be at Alex's birthday party. So then, you know, Simon guides Alex to this surprise party. He is blindfolding her. They're walking, you know, down a dock onto a ramp, up a ladder. She's in a blindfold and heels the whole time. I'm like, this chick is going to break her neck, Simon.

Surprise party culture is so interesting because I've never had a surprise party. I'm not, I don't hate surprises, but I also am not like thrilled by the idea of a surprise party. But like, if somebody needs to be walking on uneven surfaces, climbing a ladder, and they're wearing a dress and heels, the blindfold is not worth it. Take off the blindfold. It's fine. She'd rather be at the opera anyway. She takes off to blindfold. She's like, uh, I can, I can tell we're on a boat, but I don't know what we're doing. But then I hear people giggling. And then they're like surprised.

And she's like, oh, wow. It's like the owner of a hotel in same parts. And Bethany and her friend Lauren, who I've never met, who are just there to get drunk because Bethany went through a breakup. So cool, cool party. I don't know who all the actual people there were. but this was something where it's like, in this early days, it's like now this would just be a cast event.

And there might be other people there, but it would be like obviously kind of mostly for filming. And this is like, who are all these people? Why is Bethany the only one here? Where's Jill? Where's Luan? Where's Ramona? The mechanics are just so different in these early seasons.

And it's like, can we please get everyone in one place? And the answer is no. Luanne is busy at home, making sure that Noel gets his homework done before he meets with his breakdancing coach Cyclone. But yeah, the birthday party on the boat is kind of weird because, you know, people are drinking, mingling, whatever. Alex and Simon have this weird semi-intervention with Bethany to make sure she's doing okay. She's kind of babbling about how, you know, she was in this relationship. and usually she's a runner, but she, you know, she's not a Brady bunch, but then she wasn't running, but then now she has to run.

And her friend says that she's a Mustang. And Simon thinks that she means the car. So he's like, no, babe, you're a Ferrari. And she's like, no, I mean the horse. Bethany being such a horse girl is like a fun, forgotten piece of Rony lore. But then everybody leaves after drinks. Alex is like, everyone left. And then we set sail.

and then a private chef makes them dinner. They're like, you know, dancing in the moonlight. Isn't it weird to anyone else to invite everyone onto a boat for a surprise party, but then they only stay for cocktails while the boat doesn't leave the dock, and then everyone else leaves, and then the boat moves while you, like, have dinner by yourself. I just feel like I want. If I'm getting invited to the party on the boat, I want, like, a sunset cruise. I want, like, the experience of the boatness sitting at the dock on a boat is, that's just annoying because you had to go all the way to the Hudson River when you could have just met at a restaurant.

Like, you're not doing a boat thing. I don't know. Clearly, Simon and I would have planned this differently, but that's neither here nor there. So good, so good. Everything you want for summer is at Nordstrom Rack stores now and up to 60% off. Stock up and save on the brands you love like Vince, Sam Edelman, Frame, and Free People. Join the Norty Club to unlock exclusive discounts, shop new arrivals first, and more.

Plus, buy online and pick up at your favorite rack store for free. Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack. Girl, winter is so last season. And now Springs got you. looking at pictures of tank tops with hungry eyes. Your algorithm is feeding you cutoffs. You're thirsty for the sun on your shoulders.

That perfect hang on the patio sundress. Those sandals you can wear all day and all night. And you've had enough of shopping from your couch. Done hoping it looks anything like the picture when you tear up on that envelope. It's time for a little in-person spring treat. It's time for a trip to Ross. Work your magic. Back to what's happening at Luann's after Noel's breakdancing lesson.

Alex is back in town, The Count, of course. His friend Richard is visiting. We see them talking about Napoleon. In my mind, that's just every conversation that the Count has ever had is just about, like, 18th century European history. I guess Napoleon's born 19th century. Just like talking about some battle or like trade relations in France and 18th. Ten. Just talking about the Suez Canal.

That's all that Alex has. But anyway, Victoria's trying to decide if she's going to go to boarding school. Noel, the font of wisdom that he has chips in, that his theory is that if you go to an all-girls boarding school, you come out lesbian. Jesus Christ. But the count says that he went to an all-boys Catholic school, and he's not gay. So that theory doesn't hold water. And that's how science works. You know, you have a hypothesis that, you know, girls at a boarding school are lesbians.

And then you have proof or disproof that the count is not gay. You love to see it. Oh, wow, wow, wow. The world was such a different place in 2008. Some of the conversations that they have on this show just kill me. me. Ramona's very focused on figuring out what the fuck Avery is going to do with her life because she's 12 and you have to have a career path. And I guess the acting is now on the back burner. Who knows? So Mario and her are trying to get her interested in the family business, true faith

jewelry. The true faith bedazzled t-shirts make multiple appearances this episode. Ramona's wearing them in one of her confessionals. they both show up wearing them to the office on Columbus Day, I guess, because Avery has the day off school and they want her to spend it at the office learning the ins and outs of the jewelry and trophy business. Romoto's like, Mario, don't forget. And he's like, I'm Italian. I could never forget Columbus.

It's like, eerie. But Avery, you know, Avery really takes to the jewelry stuff because she's good at telling other people what to do. She's like, no, that one should be the birthstones. And Mario's like, great idea. I love that. He does say that she's really good with figuring out what's good for the teen tween market. But yeah, I think Avery, you know, Avery's an ambitious lady.

She wanted to be an actor for a while. She says she wanted to be the next Maria Sharapova at one point. You know, she just wants to be the top of everything. But that's, you know, that's about it for this episode. Bethany goes down to Miami. That's not particularly interesting. Her friend, Sarah's lecturing her about her eggs going bad. It's just like, what the fuck are you here for?

Your friend just went through a breakup and is like having an existential crisis over whether or not she wants to have a baby. And you're like, well, you know, TikTok, Mama. Who are you helping here? Come on. No, but my quote of the episode. episode actually goes earlier. Avery has her first school dance and Ramona, you know, cool mom that she is, takes all the girls to get belowouts. They're looking fab. She takes them to Alice's

teacup for a little, a little fun afternoon. And then they go home to pick outfits. And when they're like, pick outfits, I'm like, interesting. Like, I would have guessed that they already had each, like, bought a dress for this dance or something. Nope, they're wearing jeans. leggings, denim skirts, like knit tops. This dance, I mean, they're young. They're very young. So I'm not saying they should be in like, you know, prom dresses or ball gowns or couture. But I was like, oh, oh, this is like a not very formal occasion.

Ramona's going to chaperone, of course, Avery is horrified. But the quote of the episode, as the 12-year-old girls are dancing in her apartment, she goes, they keep their upper body up straight, and they just move from below. And my generation, I don't know how to do that. I move my whole body. It's a whole different way of gyrating, which I don't quite get. Ramona Singer, just dropping gems left and right. That's all for today.

Thank you so much for listening. Don't forget to rate review and follow the show wherever you listen. So you never miss an episode. You can follow us on Instagram at Bravo by Betches. And until next time, be cool. Don't be all like Uncool. Mentioned at All is produced by Dylan Hafer, Sean Kilby, Jorge Morales Pico, and Rebecca Sousmakat. Editing by Jorge Morales Pico, Social Media by Dylan Hafer, guest booking by Dylan Hafer and Ali Friedlander.

Be sure to follow at Bravo by Betches on Instagram and Twitter. All. Pay off your home, travel for life. Drive a Ferrari. In celebration of the world premiere of the Monopoly Big Board Bucks slot machine by Aristocrat Gaming, Yamava Resort and Casino at San Manuel is giving one person a $1.6 million dream package. the biggest prize in Yamava's history. Club Serrano members can earn daily instant prizes and secure a spot in the finale May 29. Don't pass go and own it all.

Only at Yamava, celebrating its 40th anniversary. You win? Details at yamava.com must be 21-20. Please gamble responsibly. Monopoly is a trademark of Hasbro. Hasbro is not a sponsor of this promotion. Betches.