Mention It All - Surviving MomTok Ft. Jessi & Layla from Secret Lives Of Mormon Wives

Episode Date: May 20, 2025

In today's episode, Dylan is joined by Secret Lives of Mormon Wives stars Jessi and Layla to talk all things season 2. From friendship fractures and messy Halloween party guest lists to everything in between. They open up about navigating divorce and dating in Utah, the realities of being single moms in Mormon culture, and delicacy that is drinking dirty sodas. Jessie and Layla get real about what it’s like to film deeply personal moments for a national audience, the emotional toll of online feedback, and why this cast is so much more than a group of influencers. Go to the Always On YouTube page to watch full length episodes every Tuesday: Youtube.com/@AlwaysOnBetches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Betches Media presents. Ha ha, laugh, funny. Mention It All, a Bravo by Betches podcast. We don't say that, but now we said it. With me, Dylan Hafer. We're going to check me, boo. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to the Mention It All podcast.

I am so excited to be joined today by two stars of the hottest show on Hulu that is back for a second season. I know you've been binging it all weekend. Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is back. And here we have Jesse and Layla in the studio. How's it going, ladies? So good, are you? I am so good now that this show is about. We've been chatting a little bit before we started that this show in the fall came out.

And I feel like people, they had heard a little bit about it. It was like, okay, we have some background info on this group, on mom talk. What is the show going to be? And it was like a runaway train. Yeah. Everybody was talking about it. People in my life that are not like reality TV lovers were like, I think I've got to watch this show. No way.

Yeah. What is it like for you guys coming out of season one? I know you got back into filming really quickly for season two. What was it like sort of in that moment when it was like, wait, now like everybody knows who we are? It was so weird. Like I think the first time it hit me was we went to the Sabrina Carpenter concert in November. That was a great moment. Right after the show aired like a couple months later. And it turned into a full meet and Greek. It was like six of us and people noticed. And it was like we couldn't even get to our seats. We were like so late. And it was like so surreal that that many people were lining up to meet us. overnight. So that was the moment where I was like, oh, people watched this. Like, oh, I think we always had this like running joke in our group, too, that we were like, oh, we feel like we're just filming like a home movie and no one's going to ever see this. So I feel like when it finally came out and then we're like, wait, it's like doing good. Then we're like number one. And we're like, then we have

fans. I just feel like it's like so surreal. And I don't think that I personally am ever going to get used to this. It's just such a pinch me moment. And I feel like we're all just so grateful that we're here. For the two of you, like you both have young kids. You both are. you know, in this, living in this community in Utah, like, was there a, what was the decision process like to sign up for the show in the first place? And then once it kind of blew up knowing, like, okay, I'm on this roller coaster, like, we're going to see it through and do more seasons. I think for me, like, I, Macy was the one who referred me to the show. And I was just like, sure, like, I just say yes to everything. I'm like, I got to try everything once. And my whole family

has always joked that I was like going to be on reality TV, no matter how it happened. So I was like, yeah, it's meant to be. So for me, it just felt natural. And then when it kept going, it was just like, okay, I guess it's happening. I just feel like we've been like writing it as it's been going without much thought, to be honest. Yeah, for me, I've been a part of like mom talk since way back since 22. So when I was presented, I wasn't with the original group that was in the pilot. But then when they started to recast, that's when they brought on me, Jesse and Jen. I was like, no, no brainer. Like I've kind of like been in this group. I know these women pretty well. And it just kind of felt like natural, especially for me at that point in my life, that's when I just barely separated from my ex.

So I was like, this is going to be perfect for me. This is exactly what I need to kind of like take my mind off of it. I never thought it would get to this level that it did. But it's crazy. I think it's so interesting with your group. You talk about kind of like bringing in a few more people and you were referred by Macy. It really feels like it's a big group. And sometimes, you know, it's hard to really like feel like you're getting to know everybody

equally. But like I really feel like watching the first few episodes of season two. It's like everybody kind of plays their role in the group. And I do feel like it's like if there were two of you were missing, it would be like, oh, I wish there was somebody that was a little more like offering their thoughts on this. Or I wish that this group scene had a little bit of this energy. Like it does feel like the ensemble really is like gelled together in a way that just works. Yeah.

And it's funny because I feel like, yeah, we all have a role to play. And I'm excited for season two because I think you get to know each of us a little bit more individually. Whereas season one, you're just getting to know us. and now we can dive deeper. And I think with season one, there also is, you know, for people that don't live in Utah, aren't, you know, don't know a lot of LDS people. It's like there is that kind of like cultural curiosity, I guess. But in season two, it's like, oh yeah, these are our friends.

Yeah. Oh, good. I'm glad you hear that. I love that. I'm glad you feel that way. Yeah, it's like, okay, like, you know, cut to the chase. We're back in there. We're back with the dirty sodas.

Like, come on. Yeah. It was so weird because that's just normal to us, you know. That's just our coffee. So when people are like so fascinating that we put cream in our coffee, we're like, what do you mean? It's just cream. Yeah. Yeah.

I think I had ended up on like Swig TikTok like a few years back. So I was like, oh yeah, that's a thing. You knew. Yeah. You were already with kids, you know. Mom Talk just like became this like this like entity. You know, like the whole like, will mom talk survive this thing after season one? I really feel like it's, it's an interesting like dynamic to add to.

There's lots of like ensemble shows with, you know, women living their lives. but like the specific sort of like sisterhood that you guys have and the question of like who really is buying into that. Like I think it adds a unique element to the show in a in a way. What has it been like for you guys like as a group sort of navigating the last year? I think it's cool for us because I feel like genuinely we're a group of women that are friends. And there's definitely friendships that have like come and gone and definitely friendships that have been tested. But I think when it comes down to it, I feel like we're showing genuine relationships that aren't linear. and we have ebbs and flows, but it's normal for friendships.

And I feel like it's just cool to have different dynamics and just show all of that. I think it's pretty cool. And I feel like genuinely we're all moms that can lean on each other and relate when we're going through hard things and our marriages and things like that. And it's just kind of cool to have kind of just like a community. Yeah. And filming reality TV isn't easy on any relationship or friendship. So we've all had our ups and downs.

But I think showing that you can get through those as important. Like we've had arguments. Yeah. And, you know, we've worked it out on TV, which is great. But I feel like that's a testament of true friendship and it can be an example to like people watching. Yeah. I think it's been interesting. Like at the beginning of the season, Miranda sort of comes back around the group.

Obviously she and Taylor had this really complex relationship in the past. And you know, you guys all have your own history with her. But it does feel like sort of there's a group effort to sort of figure out her intentions and all that. But then also each person has their own opinion and their own. own approach to something. And like, I, like, I can't remember who it was, but somebody was like, oh, like, Jesse, why were you going easy on her? And you're like, I didn't think I was going, you know. Yeah. Yeah. And it's hard too because someone comes in. And even if like there's opinions, like you're still feeling bad when it's like six people against one, you know? So it was hard because

I think we each handled it a little bit differently. Yeah. But I'll give it to Miranda. She was consistent. And she played the long game and she was patient and kind of like fought her way into the group slowly. She was very patient. She wore us down. Yeah. With the comments and things. like that. She definitely, she did it really well. Yeah. Lila, do you feel like so obviously like she's gone through, you know, her marriage, you know, isn't a thing anymore. Like, do you feel like you being one of the other people in the group that has experienced that? Like, was there sort of an inkling of like, okay, maybe we can connect over this? No, absolutely. I think being a single mom, especially in Utah, is such an isolating experience. Dating there in general is just a shit show. And then add on

being like a single mom and then being in this experience. I definitely, we are able to like relate to each other on different levels and kind of talk about things that sometimes the other girls don't get. And especially like dating on the show as well, that's something that like I've experienced now and like maybe she could experience down the road as well that it's super hard. So I'm glad that we kind of like have each other to like lean on in that aspect. I mean, I guess there's Taylor, but she's with Dakota. So is she single? Is she single? Is she not? I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. I don't think Taylor knows on a daily basis. No. Yeah. Every hour. it's different.

It's, it is like, it's tough to watch because obviously, like, as a viewer, there's an element of like, oh, yay, like, we love drama. We love people arguing. But, like, watching like Taylor and Dakota and Jen and Zach at certain points to it, it is like, it's bittersweet because you're like, okay, they have like this baby. Yeah, they have kids. There's a long road of figuring out what this looks like, whether you're together or not, co-parenting, all of that.

It's like, it must be for you. guys too also kind of hard to really like watch that. It is, especially when you see the good and the bad and you're like, we're fighting for you, but also like you should be done. Like it's so hard to decide like which side to pick. But, you know, we're just rooting for them. They're doing the best they can. I think the real question is like, will Tehota survive? Not will mom talk survive? No, literally. And should it survive? Yeah, no. Exactly. That's the hard part. This point, I feel like we know that there's definitely the women in the group that have their very strong opinions towards Dakota, Macy.

But those opinions are valid, especially with her past circumstances that kind of make her feel very strongly towards men in those situations. But I think, yeah, just like Jesse said, at the end of the day, if Taylor wants to be with him, kudos to her. Awesome. She doesn't want to be with him? Awesome. Like, I think we're here to support her in a matter which way.

I think just we want her to be happy and good behavior to be shown from his end. I think also it's hard. There's a scene in episode two where it's like Taylor's mom has everyone over, including Dakota and it's like doesn't really feel like Taylor necessarily is getting the support that she would like from her family. And I think that's hard too because like you want to feel like you can make the right decision for yourself but also for everyone around you. And if there is that kind of like push and pull, it's like it's hard. It's difficult. Yeah. And your family can be honest with you, which is amazing. But you still want to feel like they are there to support and love you even if you're

making mistakes. So yeah, but at least her family can be honest with her and sometimes brutal honestly is what someone needs and it's at that point if they choose to take that advice or to not exactly. Exactly. So good, so good. Everything you want for summer is at Nordstrom rack stores now and up to 60% off.

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Done hoping it looks anything like the picture when you tear open that envelope. It's time for a little in-person spring treat. It's time for a trip to Ross. Work your magic. Sort of are getting pulled in with the Jen and Zach. Oh, yeah. That was crazy. Did you know, so going into the season, obviously in season one, everything that went

down in Vegas and, you know, around that was like very intense with the two of them. Obviously, you had expressed opinions or said stuff back then. Did you sort of know that you were going to get kind of like called to testify in this way going into this? No. No. Oh, I genuinely just thought, like in the moment I was just telling my friend how I felt. I didn't think it would lead to like Zach wanting to talk to us and us like unraveling things and figuring out lies on both ends. It was kind of crazy.

But I'm glad I said it because I do think she deserved better. And I think that all of us coming down so hard on her opened up a bigger conversation for them to work on things. And I think they have. So that's really good. Yeah. It's tough because it's like obviously, you know, when your friend is telling you something, you're going to believe them. Yeah.

But then if there is a bigger kind of picture to be had, like you also want to be fair and, you know, make the right judgment call. So I think watching kind of that unfold in the first few episodes, it's like, yeah. Also, Zach said things about all of us. I think that's also why we were also heated. Yeah. Because thinking back, I'm like, I probably wouldn't have been like as involved if he hadn't have called out all of us and all of our relationships. So I think that's why I was so like.

And then that comment he made a gin before he left to Vegas and he's like, well, being single with two kids and be hard. And I was like, actually, I would rather be single with two kids than be talked down to actually. Yeah, exactly. Or have three kids, one being your husband. Well, I think that's. I did it hit me at first. And I was like, I thought you're talking about the third baby now. And then I was like, oh, yeah.

Four. Yeah, there you go. God. Yeah. I think it's, like, really it's important if you're evaluating, like, who you have in your life, who you're trusting to like read between the lines a little bit. And that if he's, if he's making a comment that maybe it's not directed at you, but you can hear it and be like,

hey like that actually Because I feel like it comes down to like He's generalizing a situation like that And kind of like I feel like the connotation behind it's like negative Like I feel like that's like shaming all single moms and being like well it's like hard But like there's a lot of reasons why women choose to leave a marriage Like no one willingly wants to like be a single mom That is literally that was my worst nightmare come true

So I feel like when he said that I was just like that was kind of a dig at like all single moms out there So wasn't really happy when I heard that. Yeah. I think your show, it's like the way that it approaches conversations about sort of, yeah, like staying in a marriage, being a single mom, being the breadwinner in a household or in a relationship. Like I think a lot of people, whether they're, you know, Mormon or ex-ormon or anybody else can probably watch it and be like, oh yeah, like maybe that is giving me something new to think about of like how I frame that in my mind. Yeah, exactly. I heard a lot of people talk about that actually and I got so many messages from women being like, it's just so cool to see how you're a mom and you work full time and you have a business and it's just inspiring, which is awesome. And none of us are trying to be a spokeperson that like we're like, you need to make the money and like you need to be like the in charge of your household. I think we're just trying to just like

you said, like generalize that conversation that like it doesn't have to be on paper what it's supposed to be like in the church. Well, I mean in the premiere, I think Michaela, who I would say is kind of like the most traditional of all of you guys. At least she comes across that way. I don't know. She's like, yeah, I make more on one brand deal than my husband does in a year. It's like, hell yeah. No, seriously. She makes good money. She does.

Yeah, I'm really proud of her and her content's great. I think that was interesting. A lot of people watching season one that maybe weren't hadn't seen you guys on social media or weren't aware of kind of the background sort of discovering. It's like, wait, this is like a thing. Yes. It's crazy. And I think people are also curious about influencer lifestyles, like brand deals and making money

on social media and stuff. And it can get a lot of backlash because I think people like don't understand it. But I think it was cool to kind of showcase that like those are our jobs. And we've, I mean, I have businesses too. But like I also do brand deals. And we've been able to sustain our families on that. Yeah. So you throw a Halloween party in the beginning of this season.

You made some interesting choices with the guest list. I know. So we had Miranda was invited. Miranda's ex-Chase was invited. Messy Jesse. Taylor and Dakota were both there. Like talk me through kind of like how you approached hosting that event and then sort of of obviously some things go down. Yeah. And honestly, like going into it, I just thought like,

maybe people will be a little uncomfortable, but like we're adults. Like it'll be fine. Right. No idea. It was going to go that way. Obviously, Taylor was always going to be invited. And then my husband's best friends with Dakota. So there was no world he was not going to have Dakota there. So that's how that happened. And then one of my good friends was dating Chase. So I invited her, her name's Kate. And she's bringing Chase as a plus one. I couldn't tell her like, no, you can't bring him. So I was like, it'll be fine. And then Miranda, I just, I felt bad. Like everyone was kind of ginging up on her.

She clearly wanted to come back into the group. So I felt like it would be mean to only exclude her because, you know, she's trying. And I just felt really bad. And I didn't have a personal experience with her in the past. So I was trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. But I guess that was like a recipe for disaster. Like her ex-husband who's also hooked up with Layla. Does that, does it say that?

Oh, yeah. I think you say like a month or two that you guys were seeing each other. Yeah. We saw each other for like a, I feel like there's a stigma that I only just like slept with them one night. Like no, we were like seeing each other for like a month-ish. And then it just like didn't work out, which is totally fine. Then he started dating Kate right after. But I know. I feel like there's like the stigma that it was just like a one night saying. I'm like, no, actually like he would like take me on dates and stuff like that. But like yeah, definitely an interesting. He swung with Taylor, dated Lela, married Miranda. Like it's so.

How's extreme about. Yeah. No. Honestly. Probably. Probably. Yeah. No, I think also like when you're filming a show, there is an added layer where it's like we saw a scene before that with Dakota and Taylor where they're in this really intense place. But like you don't know that when you're like making the guest list for your Halloween party. They're different every other day. Like if it had been the next day they probably would have been fine. Well and even going into that event, Miranda says that like she and Chase are in a good place and they have like they've been working on their co-parenting relationship. And so like it kind of just feels like a perfect storm of like all of these ingredients. And then there's Chippendale's dance going on.

Yeah, that was like the cherry on top. I thought that was going to be the most dramatic. It's crazy that something else happened. That night, we always like talk about it where like it feels like a fever dream. Like, do that actually happen? Actually, I, it was so funny. I think like our producers in the back just like jumping up and down like, this is so good.

This is so good. I'm sure they were stoked. Yeah. And none of that was like premeditated. No. It's just get us all in one room together with exes and new girlfriends and just like there's bound to be shit to happen. Yeah.

I think it's like going into season two, I feel like. that's sort of, you've laid the groundwork for a lot of those relationships. And so it's like then you can kind of, like you said, just like put everyone in a room and like let it have that way the truth was going to come out too. Because like Miranda was like still holding back a little bit. We know Chase is going to tell us how we feel. So I was like, let's just like let it all out and see what happened. Yeah. Honestly. And I think like getting a little bit like something like your husband being close with Dakota is something that maybe in season one you wouldn't really like pick up on that. But it's important context because it's not true.

just like, oh, Dakota's here because we're on a TV show and it is like good for drama. It's like this community really has that like interconnected. Yeah, like some people will think like, oh, they're just friends for the show. Like, no, we are truly integrated in each other's lives. And so regardless of that there was a show or not, it probably would have been the same dynamic. So good sleep is everything. That's why Ali's science back support is made with a blend of melatonin and Ltheonine for both kiddos and grownups. so when your mind won't switch off,

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Own the Dream The one person who was not there Because she was literally having a baby Oh yeah Whitney. I don't know if she would have been invited either To be honest, so. Whitney going into this, I mean, season one Like Whitney got a lot of heat

Yeah, yeah. I think people on and off the show Yeah. From your perspective, seeing her kind of come back around this season, knowing that, like, it did not go great for her the last time. Like, how did you kind of like decide to handle that, knowing that obviously she was going to be at least somewhat present? I think it was, I don't know.

I think it was hard because it's like, this is such an isolated experience and it's hard to, like, broadcast it to the world. And I remember, like, we would talk on her group chat sometimes when people would, like, make fun of her for, like, the toilet paper shoe thing and stuff like that. And, like, we're humans. We're not just going to be, like, laughing at, like, one of our, like, friends. Actually, in the group, I think we all were like, that was sad. Like, yeah, no, we're all like this actually, like, this kind of sucks.

So I think, like, I was open to, like, kind of hearing her out. And, like, we definitely had, like, our feelings towards it. But I think at the end of the season, she kind of won me over in a way. I feel like she kind of did a good job to me. In season two. In season two, yeah. But I can't speak for all the girls. I know McKay definitely will still feel the way.

Was there a scene in the diner with her? I can't. Maybe. Okay. So because I remember, like, when she first. started coming back around. Me and Michaela were like pretty stern with her. We were like, no, you know, you can't just like leave and come back. But then, yeah, as time went on, she kind of softened us and she was really consistent and she was trying really hard. So we were like,

okay. And she came back. So you'll see how that unfolds. But I think everyone deserves to like say their side of the story and like get a second chance. You don't want to be so severe with her to the point where you almost go in the other direction. It's like now I'm the one who's being, you know, the gatekeeper for no good reason when she's actually. You know, been trying really hard for the last, you know, two months to get in my good graces. Like, it really is almost like a day by day evaluating like, okay, like, yeah. Is it a genuine effort being made? Is it enough? And if she makes the same mistakes, then, okay, condemn her. But if she's truly changing, then you got to let them, you know. Yeah. And that's like, you know, knowing that we have,

you know, a whole, a lot of episodes to work on. Like, you can't just shut things down right away. No. I'm excited to hear your thoughts on the rest of the season. I know. I know. I think other people will be watching it like by the time this comes out. And so you'll be, you'll be hearing a lot of feedback. I know. We don't know yet. I know. It's like still a few days away. So we're, we're recording this like right before it comes out. And then obviously people will be binging. People will be catching up. I'm sure you're like comment sections and DMs and everything will be popping. Like, what is your mindset now that you've done it once before in season one that people are going to have a fresh batch of content to react to? One of the best things. One of the best things

I've ever heard was that like you're going to have a bunch of people that are going to love you and you're going to have a bunch of people that are going to hate you and you kind of have to focus on neither one of them because if you focus too much on the love, it gets to your head. If you focus on the hate, you can like bring yourself down really bad. So I feel like just like everyone is going to feel both ways about you and you just kind of have to silence both of them out for a little bit. None of it's real. None of it's real.

I think at the end of the day, people in your personal life know you at your core. And I feel like, yes, you can watch the show and kind of gather a little bit about somebody from it, but at the end of the day, that's not their whole entire life. And you're seeing a very, very small glimpse of them. So I think just remember who you are is what's really important. Yeah, I totally agree with that. I feel like our engagement's always pretty crazy right after the show comes out. So just knowing, yeah, we're going to get good comments and bad comments. And yeah, I'm like, maybe I'll delete social media for a week or two and just like not read anything because you never know like what the reaction's going to be. But we're excited.

I mean, I think it was a really good season. So I'm excited to see people's thoughts. Mom Talk will survive this, but maybe your screen time will be a little lower. Yes, I'm like, maybe I won't survive this. I know. It was so funny in the fall. Like, I was getting all of the like hairstyling videos on my algorithm and all the comments of people being like, I'm watching. I don't live in Utah and I have never gotten hair extensions.

Why did I just watch this? Right. It's weird that took off. Or like the fruity pebbles, the swig. Like little things that we didn't think were main storylines, obviously. It just took off in the culture. It was crazy. crazy. The blue coats.

Yes. Things like that. Halloween costumes. Wait, you guys have a very fun new intro for this season that you filmed. There's a getting out of the water. A lot sexier. Yeah. We ditch the temple.

What was the shoot for that? Like, because I have to imagine it was like kind of cold and maybe a little funny. Well, we were in this like warm. It wasn't even. It was a hot. It was like a lukewarm mud bath. Mud bath almost. Or like dipping our hair.

Yeah. Do we look good still? Like whipping our hair around. I'm sure it looked actually really crazy behind the scenes. But hot. I was home for Mother's Day and I was watching, I watched the season premiere with my mom. Oh, nice. And it's funny because she's not a reality TV person really.

But like obviously I'm whenever I'm around, she like dabbles and she had so many questions. Oh my gosh. Yeah. She was like, why are they wet? Their hair is so long. What is the show? What is the mom talk? What is it?

We're like, mom, we got to start with season one. We got to rewrite. I'm like, yeah. So she is with her and then they have. Yeah. So you're like, I got to break it down. Her jaw. She's on the floor.

Yeah. Like that thing that our account posted, like the whiteboard and it like, did you see that? Oh yeah. We like, yeah. She's got to watch that because it like catches you up on what happened to season one. And by the end of season two, we're going to need a whole other whiteboard. Yes. We're going to need like 10.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, 10 probably. Well, congratulations on the new season. I hope everybody's loving it. And I can't wait to see what's next. Thanks for having us. That's too. Honestly.

We'll have to come back in like a year from now and compare notes on how we're feeling. Yeah. We'll see. We'll see. Thank you guys so much. Thank you. Thank you for having us. Thanks everyone for watching. Don't forget to rate review and subscribe. And until next time, be cool.

Not like all uncool. Mention It All is produced by me, Dylan Hafer, and Joe Diomore. Edited by Julia Stanton and Grace Hernandez-Johnson. Socials by Dylan Hafer. Our senior director of studios is Brian Russell Smith, Associate Director of Studio Post-production Shannon Jimenez-Sas-Sasone, and our production manager is Will Maxwell. Be sure to follow Bravo by Betches on Instagram,

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