Mention It All - The Marge Tells All Ft. Margaret Josephs

Episode Date: April 8, 2021

Bari and Dylan are joined by Margaret Josephs, star of RHONJ and author of a brand-new book, ‘Caviar Dreams, Tuna Fish Budget.’ Marge spills all the tea about her writing process, and how her unique childhood experiences have shaped her experience on Real Housewives. She recounts how she got cast on the show, and gives her honest thoughts about former castmates Danielle Staub and Siggy Flicker. She also weighs in on Joe and Melissa Gorga’s recent marital issues, and tells us how she really feels about Jennifer Aydin’s drinking. You can buy SkinnyPop at retailers nationwide, or go to the Shop Now page on skinnypop.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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With Dylan Hafer And Barry Rosenfeld And he's start drinking alcohol Now go to sleep week Hey everyone Welcome back to the Mention at All podcast I'm Dylan Hafer And I'm Barry Rosenfelds

And we are joined by a very special guest today Of course you know We're from Real Housewives of New Jersey but more importantly, she's a brand new author, Margaret Joseph's. Hello, welcome. Oh, hi, guys. Hi, Dylan. Hi, Barry. So excited to be here. The Marge is here. The Marge is in that. We've had this on the books for a while because, of course, your book is coming out next week. Before we get started, just tell everyone the name of the book where they can find it when it's coming out, all that stuff so we don't forget. Yes, Caviar Dreams, Tuna Fish Budget, and it will be out on April 13th. Also the audio. I do it. myself and it's from Simon Schuster. It's really available everywhere. Amazon, Target, Barnes and Nobles, Simon Schuster website. You could just get it everywhere. I'm already reading the book,

but now I'm going to have to get the audio book because I feel like that's just going to add a whole another layer. I was just going to say that. I can listen to you specifically speak for like the rest of my life. So I think I'm going to have to get that on audio. Oh, thank you so much. I mean, listen, it's right from the horse's mouth. But some people find my voice on a chalkboard, but other people find, you know, can really listen to me. So, Barry, I appreciate it. Yes, I'm not one of the ones with a chalkboard. So speaking of your voice, obviously when you're writing a book, your voice comes through there.

What struck me when I first started reading it, like the first page, it just sounds like you talking. And so what was kind of the process? I know we saw you on the show this season, working with someone to. help kind of in the process. How did you kind of go about sitting down to write a book? Well, you know, I've never wrote a book before, obviously. So I collaborated with a ghost writer. But it was so important for me that it was really my voice, that I would write it. So we really collaborated. Emily, who's great, transcribed with me, she would send back, you know, outlines and the general idea. But then painstakingly, the girls that work with me who

know me so well, we would be up all night, putting everything in there that really needed to be in there and put my voice into it. So really, it was a true collaboration. And, you know, no one could really sound like me but me. Right. But it was right from the opening because it's just, I think, my mind works in mysterious ways. So that's what it was. So it was a great collaboration. She's amazing. She really dragged it out of me. so that was perfect. Yeah. Well, also in your book,

you write about how you've never really felt like protected in your life. How has that shaped the way you approach your relationships on housewives? You know, it's very interesting because I never really did. I always felt like I took care of myself. And I always say my first adult relationship really is with Joe, where I have a sense of safety. And I do feel like on housewives, because I am a grown woman now,

I feel protective of other people and very nurturing. in my relationships with other people and women. So that's why I think sometimes people don't understand me or misinterpret, even with Jennifer, with the drinking. I really wasn't judging her at first. I mean, when she didn't respond the way I expected, I was actually worried about her when I first saw her. And it wasn't like I had repressed issues from March.

They're not repressed. They're right out there, okay? And I get concerned. I want everybody to hold themselves in the best light. I expect everybody to hold themselves in a higher standard. And I'm all about a good time. I'm all about a party girl. I love a tipsy drunk.

But I am very protective of the people I care about. And even if I don't love you every single day of the week, I still don't want anything there to happen to you. Right. Yeah. I thought it was interesting. You talk about how your mom's drinking when you were growing up kind of shaped your view of how alcohol affects people.

And you say that you think a lot, you feel like a lot of people have. issues with alcohol that they don't necessarily realize. It's interesting because Housewives is a show where we tend to see so much, you know, drunken behavior and stuff. Has that been kind of difficult for you to navigate or do you feel kind of content enough doing your own thing that it doesn't really bother you? It doesn't really bother me. I'm content doing my own thing.

I think sometimes people aren't comfortable enough in their own skin to let loose. And that's why they use alcohol to loosen. or whatever it is. I think I've been so normal being a little kooky on my own, so I don't need something to loosen up. So I kind of just do my own thing. I enjoy being around other people having a good time because I'm a good time anyway. I don't need to drink to loosen up. So I enjoy watching other people loosen up. I just get anxious when it turns a corner because I don't want anything to go wrong. Yeah. Totally. So has Marge Sr. read the book yet? Yes, Marge Sr. has read the book. And you would think, you know, she is totally fine with it. She lived it. I mean,

certain things she didn't remember. She's like, oh, my God. I went skinny dipping. Oh, my God. I don't remember that. And then I refreshed her memory, but she is so fine with it. Marksnier and I have such a healthy relationship now. Oh, good. Good. I loved, yeah, I loved reading that kind of in the early chapters of the book, you had such an interesting relationship with each other when you were growing up because it wasn't like your average mother-daughter relationship like you talk about. So it's, it's great to see now that you're both adults, you know, you've both been independent, you know, in your own situations, that you guys have sort of been able to create a relationship with each other as adults that seems to work so well. Yes. Yes. I mean, you don't know that your parents are

kooky or different when you're a little kid, right? It's like everybody, you think that's normal until you go to someone else's house. I mean, that's really, and then you go to therapy years later and you're like, hey, that was normal, you know. So that's, yes, but we have an amazing relationship now. She's the best grandmother. And, you know, she validated the way I felt. And I, you move on from it. Like I always say, you're not responsible what happens to you in your childhood. You're responsible as an adult to fix it. And that's, I think, sometimes why I lose patience also with people because everybody doesn't have an easy childhood. But you have to work, and you cannot use it as an excuse. You have to work on it as an adult to fix it.

That's so funny. You just said that recently. My brother and I were talking about memories we had as a kid. And we were like, wait, was that normal? Was that not normal? Like we're realizing it now as grown adults and we're like, they did that. Like our parents did that. But you know what? It's fine to just look at it in the past. You know what? Everybody's human. Your parents were young. Everybody does the best they can. And that's the way I always say. Marcy was 20 years old when she had me. She was a young girl. So when I always say she was drinking, you have to look at it as like, she was the age of like, you know, 24. I'm four, she's 24. So when you know, when you look at it that way, and I was comparing it to someone on my show who's in their 40s, you know, my mother was a young girl. It was like she was just out of college, really. Yeah.

Yeah, it's interesting to think about how like the, generally like the, you know, mothers that we see on housewives aren't, you know, people who are having babies in their early 20s. And, you know, they're kind of at a different phase in life where they have, have, you know, maybe more resources available to them or, you know, kind of just a different attitude about what it's like to raise a child. Yes. And I'm, you know, and I love everybody to let loose and I want everybody free to be me. I'm all about a good time. I, I'm all about a good time. Well, okay. So on this week's episode, we saw Melissa and Joe get into, you know, quite the argument

and you were there for all of it. So what was your take on the situation? Because honestly, as watching it, we talk about this frequently, like with production and whatnot. It seemed like we were missing some parts from what was really going on. I am going to tell you, though the argument was cut short, you really weren't missing much. I think Alyssa walking in front of him triggered something to him and obviously something deeper was going on. And it is something in their relationship. I think he feels that he doesn't want to be left behind. And I think it really was something in him that night. He feels like she's not as attentive maybe to him.

She's not as pays as much attention. And I think for some reason that night it hit home. And it really was a very bad fight. And I was like a little freaked out by it. When you guys got back to Melissa's house and you and Jackie were just kind of trying to be like, who do we, where do we go? Like what do we talk to? do we leave? Do we stay? I feel like we've all been in a situation like that where it's like,

I don't want to cause problems, but I have no idea what to do right now. Oh, yeah. I wanted to scudadal out of that room because Joe and I are extremely close with Melissa and Joe. So I always feel very comfortable saying whatever it is. I want everything to be perfect and work out, but I'm going to give them my honest opinion. Right. I love when you were like, Joe, go outside. You handle it. Yeah, go outside with Joe Gorgia. You tell it. Listen, Joe and I have been down this road twice. So we made mistakes in our first marriage. We worked very hard to do it right this time. Girl, winter is so last season. And now Springs got you looking at pictures of tank tops with hungry eyes. Your algorithm is feeding you cutoffs. You're thirsty for the sun on your shoulders. That perfect hang on the patio sundress. Those sandals you can wear all day and all night. And you've had enough of. of shopping from your couch.

Done hoping it looks anything like the picture when you tear open that envelope. It's time for a little in-person spring treat. It's time for a trip to Ross. Work your magic. I'm interested to hear from you what you feel about kind of bringing those relationship issues onto the show

and, you know, handling it from an honest perspective. Obviously, we've seen, you know, Jackie kind of put through the ringer in the first half of this season with the rumor with Evan. How do you feel like, you've kind of been able to navigate that because it seems like you've had a relatively, uh, you know, drama free personal life on the show so far. Well, you know, I feel it's good to put the relationship issues out there because people

can relate to it. I don't know one couple in, in the real world that does not have relationship problems. I don't care how perfect it is. I mean, people were very upset with me the way I yelled at Joe. I think people were like, you speak to your husband. I don't give two shit this when anybody says. everybody yells at their husband or white screams at them. Everyone's like, I can't believe the way you speak your husband. Cut me a break. Okay? That just shows that I'm very real.

And Joe and I have arguments. And when he yells at me in the house and I know he's heated, I am not going to inflame it. And I think everybody just put their relationship out there. And I think that's what's so great about Jersey. Our husbands are there. And it shows real life problems within marriages, but that you can recover from it. everything's not that serious. And we're not going to sugarcoat it. We're not going to sugarcoat our relationships. I mean, but Joe and I, listen, it's my second husband. I'm his second wife.

We did a lot to be together. And we really value and respect each other. And a fight like that when I yell, that's going to blow over in two seconds. It's not that deeper serious. There's no underlying nonsense with us. Well, I have to say, it was like when I was watching and everyone was going off about and questioning you, like yelling. I was like, there was nothing wrong, not one ounce wrong with how you spoke to Joe. I didn't even think anything of it until people started commenting on it. I was like, that's a normal, like, grown relationship. If you think people are holding hands and kissing each other all day wrong, all day long,

that's the problem. Like, I didn't. Jennifer had a lot to say about the red flags. And I didn't quite get it. No, I couldn't even understand. She was like, I don't yell at Bill. I don't, and first of all, I don't even believe that. I'm not going to, you know, when you put stuff out there and say, this isn't, I don't do this,

I don't do that, that's bullshit. You know, I don't make it out like everything's perfect. That is not me. I have all my stuff right out there. I don't pretend everything's great. I don't pretend everything's perfect. What you see is what you get. So speaking of relationships and friendships on the show, you write in the book, which I thought was

interesting, that when you first came on the show, Siggy was the one person that you already knew going in. and that you really didn't get sort of the warm welcome you were maybe expecting from her. I'm curious how you feel, I know like with her and then also with Danielle, you've had a couple of friendships kind of go sideways on the show. Do you feel like people,

some people have trouble sort of acting normal in a friendship once the cameras are there? And is that kind of a tough thing to deal with? I think some people are insecure and they cannot distinguish between, reality and camera. I think that's what's disturbing. I'm going to say this point blank. I think Danielle is not a bad. I know it's crazy. I'm going to say I don't think she's a horrible person. I think she is damaged. I know she's going off on Instagram saying horrible things about me.

It doesn't bother me at all because I actually feel bad for her. I really did care for her. And I can say that honestly, I felt like I had a true friendship with her. And I really did care about her. She just didn't want to hear it. I think she's a hard time differentiating reality from TV. With that being said,

I only want good things for her and I want her to be okay. With Siggy, I think she's pure fucking evil. I do. And I do feel that way. She's a stain on New Jersey. Yeah.

And she's cold calculated, easily threatened, and, you know, so happy to be rid of her. Well, I feel like Siggy was one of those housewives where they come in, they have a great first season, they kind of stir it up, it's a fun time, and then you come back for a second season and it's like, oh, you can't really handle this. Like, this isn't doing good things for you. Yeah, I mean, she is just, she was not nice, and I could say it, and she really is,

she's just not, she's not a good person. And there's just not one redeeming quality about her whatsoever. Well, that's like I wasn't expecting that jump from Danielle because I was going to ask the question. What are your thoughts on Danielle's Instagram lives? And then we just came full circle with Siggy. So, okay, I'm glad that we have. No, but you listen. I mean, have you not seen her Instagram?

I mean, yeah. I mean, if you're, yeah, Siggy's Instagram is, it's a site to behold. To be honest, I'm going to be honest. Like, no, I don't follow. Might be blocked at this. point. But I'm locked. P.S. I obviously have walked, but people have sent it to me. And the thing, you know, she's, the conspiracy theories are just insane. Yeah. It's, I mean, to each their own to a certain degree, but then there are certain things where it's like, yeah. You know, when you're calling everybody in Hollywood pedophiles and this, you've gone too far. Right. Yeah. Okay. So. I know. That was kind of funny. Sorry. I appreciate that a lot. But moving on from that. So how. do you stay true to yourself and your friendships when it seems like people around you are more concerned

with their image on the show? You know what? I think I'm just like, I, people worry about their image. That's just not who I am. And I feel I have such solid people around me. Lexi's been in my life for 12 years. I've the same friend since kindergarten. I have such a solid group of people around me. Anybody who worries about their room down the show, I'm always just like, this isn't real, you know, if this is what you're worried about and you can't be your authentic self, people could smell it, just, you know, it doesn't face me. I'm just like, get a life.

You love Lexi. Lexi's the best. You know, I really, I feel sorry for anybody who cannot feel comfortable in their own skin. Don't worry about just their image and put on airs because that's not even attractive to me. Totally.

I'm curious, what would you say has been maybe the most surprising or unexpected part about your experience? on New Jersey, and then also with writing the book, kind of what that experience showed you or maybe you were surprised by? I think the way people relate on the show. I didn't realize when I got on the show

that people relate to so many of the different, you know, people on it, like everybody reaching out to me, I couldn't leave my husband, Marge. You know, I have relationships, issues with my mother. I'm aging. I love that, you know, you're real. You're not the skinny wine. You know, things like that.

I love, no, I love that that people are like, right to me. I answer my own social media. So I love that I can interact with people. I say it's a study in sociology. And I find, you know, people think it's all about the drama. It's not. It's about relating to people. And it can make a difference.

It's also a great platform for, you know, philanthropic endeavors. And I got to do great stuff. But that's what I find so interesting. that people take it so seriously. I mean, I walk down the street. They're worried about what, you know, what I'm doing with my house. People are so invested. I have to say I'm, I am a little bit with the lives. The house looks great, by the way. Thank you. Thank you. It's really, it's really coming together. I'm so happy. And I think people, you know, people are just like, why did you take so long? I moved in, I bought this house as a project. I had no idea I was getting on a show.

You know, it's not like I was saying you're trying out for housewife for years. I had no idea. Yeah. It sounds actually, in the book, it sounds like it was a very almost strangely quick process for you to get on the show. Because you said you did a FaceTime interview and then they were like, okay, you're cast. Yeah, it was a FaceTime interview. I think they were getting down to the wire to get a new housewife. I had been already going to be on it.

They wanted me for season six. I wrote in the book. I couldn't get out for reasons for. negotiations. So I was cast to do another show at that point, season six. My own show, pigtails of power tools. FYI did it. So that's what it was. So it was very quick. And I was very lucky. You know, like, you know, it's not like, I immediately was like, you're the new house. Like, I was like, great. Not a big deal. I thought like, I had no idea. I had no, it was just a very natural. I belong in this dysfunctional family. Yeah. It's the family I was meant to be in.

Yeah. Margaret, I have. to say, though, that timing really is everything with that statement because season six is, I think, my personal least favorite season ever. It was a little messy. It was, it was a transition year. And I think you never know. Yeah, and I don't know who would have been on it. Maybe those, maybe Amber wouldn't have been on it. Maybe I would have been the, I don't know. And it wasn't right. And it wasn't good timing. Timing is everything. And I, that's what I'm saying. I think this is a great place for me. I truly love the girls. I mean, not at every given moment, but I really do. Yeah, I feel like you guys have had part of the reason you've been able to have such a consistent

cast in the last few years with, I mean, really no one coming or going now for three seasons, is that you have the ability to kind of, you know, get mad at each other, argue, have your disagreements, but it still feels like a cohesive group at the end of the day, whereas sometimes on reality shows, it can feel like, I don't even know why these people are hanging out. Like, they clearly don't like each other. They don't have anything in common. Whereas I think Jersey is really in such a good groove

of feeling like it is a friend group where everybody does generally enjoy each other's company. I mean, we all really have authentic friendships. Everybody sees each other all year round. The husbands happen to be very good friends also. Yes, we're waiting for that spinoff. Yeah, they spend a lot of those guys. their heads would be so swollen if they got to spit up.

I don't think I'd be able to handle it. And they are great and they're very good friends. And they have a relationship outside the women. They meet for dinner. My Joe works a lot with Joe and Frank. They're together all the time. So it's great. It's really just a natural, you know, relationship with everybody.

And it's really, it's nice. It's a great thing. I always say we're going to be old ladies. We might fight, but years down the road, we're going to be old ladies on tour together. Remember when we went that. I love that. All right.

So speaking about, we know the reunion is coming up. How are you feeling? Are you a pro or con reunion day person? How do you feel about that? It's fine for me. It's another day. It's another day of banser for the lodge.

I love that. You know, I'm always just worried about. Are my Spanx going to show? Am I sweating? To me, it's like another day. I enjoy it. We're excited to see Andy's fishing for questions on Twitter as we speak.

I know, I know. I love it. I know what people are going to say, Marge, I'm dwang and mom shaming. I'm not mom shaming. Okay, we have... People don't understand a metaphor. Or an analogy, apparently.

Painful, painful people. Okay, so we have a quick little game we want to play before we let you go. It's called Who Would You Choose? It's a bunch of questions. We did the same game with Jackie when she was on the last month. And you're just going to name who from the New Jersey cast you would choose for each category. And it's not too shady, we promise. Oh, it's fine.

Okay. Who would you take motherhood advice from if you were in need of some? Oh, you have to, of, oh, Dolores. Okay. No, because we have very similar mothering styles. Her kids are both, yeah. Yeah. Whose closet would you read?

Who's clothes what I fit into? That's the whole other thing. Believe it or not, Dolores. We have very similar style. She wears flowy toe. We wear a lot of the same labels. Dolores, I feel like, is just looking gorgeous this season. She seems so confident and, you know, just having a good time.

Yes. I take, she always sends me stuff. She always sends me clothes. Lodge. I bought this. It still is tags. I take a lot of crap from her anyway. So I agree.

Okay. Who would you want to plan your next vacation? Oh, that's a tough one. That's a tough one. Who travels the way? Probably Melissa, because she knows where I like to stay and stuff like that. Who would you want to cook you dinner? Teresa.

Yeah. I feel like that's a gift. That was Jackie's answer, except she was afraid Teresa would spit in the food. Okay. Who would you take relationship advice from? Oh, relationship advice. Oh, that's easy. Melissa.

Mm-hmm. Okay. Who would you let decorate your house? come on. You can plead the fifth on this one. You know what? None of the above. None of the above,

only because I have very different style than everybody. Yeah. You know, I am very out. I don't even think I'm out there. I just feel like I'm a different. I think everybody else doesn't take risks and I'm a very big risk taker.

And, you know, I mix prints. I'm very, yeah, no one. Fair enough. I'm a picky bitch. I'm not going to learn. That's an acceptable answer. And then last one, which housewife from another city

would you choose to join the New Jersey cast? Dorinda. I'd pick Dorinda. Because I could fight with her and make up with her because we are good friends. She's not happy to know anymore. So should I pick someone who's still on the show?

I mean, Derinda works. We love Derinda. Yeah. We're very good friends. And I think she would be great. I think she would yell at other people. So it would be great.

I was going to say I can totally see that happening. And you know what? Jackie said that she needed someone also with like, you know, like a backbone and like someone to help. And I'm surprised she didn't choose Durinda. That would have been a good fun. Yeah, DeRinda has a big backbone. She's like a universal arguer. You know, like, I love that.

Margaret, this has been so fun. We're so glad you could join us. Remind everyone where they can find your book and, you know, all the details. Yes. Okay. Caviar Dreams, Tuna Fish Budget. It's out next Tuesday, April 13th. But I also have live events where you can, if you purchase tickets, you get a signed copy

from the Marge, live events, April 13th, 14th, and 16th. And just go on Margaret Josephs.com. All the live events are there. So sign up for that. That would be great. You get to ask the March questions and get a signed copy of the book. Booked and busy and ready to go. Busy, ready to go.

Yes. Thank you, Margaret. So fun. Thank you so much for being here. And best of luck with the book and the reunion and all the good stuff coming up. Thanks so much, Dylan and Barry. Thank you. That was so much fun talking with Margaret. I hope you guys all enjoyed Barry. Wow. I mean, so much too, this built. Seriously, if you are a fan of Margaret, go check out the book because I'm making my way through it right now. And it's juicy. It's not. I would say like Housewives books, there's like a scale of one to 10 and some of them are like kind of a letdown. Margaret definitely put it, put it all out there. Well, Margaret's the type of person, as you can hear in this episode where she's, you know, lets it all out.

She's herself. She's authentic. So she did that through her book as well. And we love the Marge. That was, that was very fun. We absolutely do. Okay. That being said, it is now time for us to share our grab the skinny pop moments.

We are not going to be doing our normal jersey recap this week because, of course, we talk to Margaret. But like we always know, endless entertainment calls for endless popcorn. And luckily, every kernel of skinny pop is so light, crunchy and delicious that we can eat it by the handful or even the bagful. So we are going to be sharing grab the skinny pop moments from last night's New Jersey episode because we didn't get to recap it. Barry, what is your grab the skinny pop moment? My skinny pop moment was Joe Gorga's reaction to Melissa not waiting for him and just leaving him at the little ticket stand and going right into the Uber. I mean, I was like, if that were me, I'd be like, honey, go ahead.

Please, please, leave me alone. It was. I don't need to hold hands. It was one of those things where I feel like, based on what Margaret said, it makes sense that they kind of had been, you know, a little tense already that night. Right. But it just felt like such a, such an unnecessary reaction to. Yeah, because you want to know why you always, when I see things like this, this on the show,

I always compare it to my person. personal life. And I'm like, would my parents react that way? Like, absolutely not. You know, like, and of my parents are normal, they fight over everything. But like, that particular instance, I wouldn't even be a second guess. Like, they would just be like, oh, where's, where's who, you know, they're in the van. I don't know. It just, I needed a lot of popcorn for that because, you know, other people's drama is good to watch. You know, my grab the skinny pop moment, I'm a little ashamed to say, I kind of fell for the realtor, Jazeel prank for a second. They got me. I'm like, why is his phone ringing so much? Geez, put it on vibrate. Yeah. You know, I, whatever, good for, good for Joe for getting back at Melissa. I'd rather, I'd rather him get back at her with a prank than bring it up in, you know, an argument.

So I'm glad that score is settled. It seems like we can finally move on. But I'm curious to see if, if they're going to keep having little marital issues for the rest of the season. I hope not to be honest, but you know what? We can always use some more drama. I think they're doing okay. We'll see. But that is today's grab the Skinny Pop moment.

Of course, you can grab Skinny Pop yourself at Retailers Nationwide or go to the Shop Now page on Skinnypop.com. We will be back tomorrow. Don't forget to rate, review, subscribe, follow us on Instagram at Bravo by Betches and just be cool. Don't be all like uncool. Mention It All is produced by Sean Kilby and Jorge Morales Pico. editing by Sean Kilby Social media by Dylan Hafer

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