MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - Adjacent to Fame

Episode Date: May 28, 2021

Sydnee is giving major auntie vibes on this week's solo episode of the Unofficial Expert! Sydnee, Marie, and Andrew talk poly relationships, Sydnee's messy refrigerator, and Summer Walker's baby. Enjoy!----Listen to The Unofficial Expert Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus:https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus----BUY UNOFFICIAL EXPERT MERCH:https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-unofficial-expert-podcast----FOLLOW THE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT:https://www.instagram.com/UnofficialExpertFOLLOW SYDNEE:https://www.instagram.com/JustSYDbwhttps://twitter.com/justsydnycFOLLOW MARIE:https://www.instagram.com/Reeezyhttps://twitter.com/MsReeezyFOLLOW ANDREW:https://www.instagram.com/mcgui_guySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

forever dog good afternoon you sexy beach good afternoon you sexy beach you sexy beach sydney do you see anything different about my apartment uh it looks cleaner no the bike is gone oh well that's why it's cleaner it looks cleaner because you ain't got you i sold my bike yesterday that giant raggedy beach i'm so proud of you i mean i was happy that you got a bike and then i was like oh the bike is really it's not really your style not not biking but the bike style was not you well it was black and skinny and simple and that's what i wanted or i wanted like a bright red bike um so the complete opposite but it was also it was too big for me and it was taking up too much space in my apartment because my raggedy ass landlord would not let me leave it in the

hallway that crusty dusty beach well the the craziest thing is that that's uh most landlords they said i can't have my shit near my door either so yeah but it was in the hallway yeah in the building mines was in the hallway as well oh yeah but yours and your landlord's bike was in that hallway for literally like six years okay but she could have moved her bike i live downstairs she does not so who complained because i remember coming in and out of your apartment it was like an episode of legends of the hidden temple so how who her dad said something yeah her dad said something oh okay not only was it a fire hazard but allegedly somebody lives downstairs or will live downstairs and i'm like never see them they never come up that way oh yeah yeah so i was like

you ain't got to lie craig you ain't got to lie don't you hate landlords that lie i i don't like my landlord but i think she really wants me to like her she keeps bringing me gifts gifts um like the other day she knocked on my door and gave me rubber dish gloves what she's like oh you have the smallest hands in the building and these are too small for me and i was like do i have the smallest hands there are people with wait tiny gloves that you buy for like two dollars at like right right and then she gave me she'll every couple of months or every like christmas or whatever she'll bring me like a bottle of wine but it's like that wine that you sell they sell near the cash register at, like, a CVS.

Oh, like Chateau Diana or something? Yes, Chateau Diana, exactly. And it's, like, a super sweet... Has, like, zero alcohol, yeah. Right, and it's, like, it's juice. It's juice in a wine bottle. I mean, but she's trying. I mean, first of all, she's older and she's cheap.

We know that she is cheap. We know she's cheap. She don't want to spend no kind of money. So you're lucky that somebody didn't give her that bottle of wine and then she re-gifted it to you. Right, but I honestly, the first time she gave me a bottle, that's what I thought had happened.

But she gives me a bottle frequently enough that I'm like, oh, she just got this at the Duane Reade before she came here. But I do truly think that she wants me to like her, which makes me like her less. Oh, is that the key to Marie's heart? Not trying to impress you? Listen, if you really want me to like you,

you should make me not pay no rent. Babe, or make it easier for me to pay rent because she only wants a check every month. And it's like, babe, Venmo is the future. You live in the past. Yeah, I agree. I agree. But also there's Zelle.

There's Zelle. Like, I mean, just make it easier for me to pay so when I'm late, you can be like, there should be no excuse why you're late. Exactly. You know what I mean? I'm going to be late with a check because I got to go find the check.

then i gotta go write the check then i gotta go then i got first i gotta remember how to complete the check yeah i don't know i don't know i'm like girl i haven't i haven't filled out a check ever every month i do it every month i do it and i'm like what name yeah yeah cross through the x like i don't i don't know we gotta talk to her we gotta hang out invite her to the knit have her come out invite her to the knit yeah she's gotta like loosen up yeah she's real she's a religious um caribbean lady so her at the knit would be like oh you guys need prayer and jesus and you know she's throwing holy water at the stage and we slip in and sliding up there so i mean honestly i might need it i'm not i'm not opposed to that at where i am in my life i'm like

Maybe some good prayer and a really homophobic religious woman can change my life. How? It's the energy. It's the energy. Yeah. I'm not sure that answered the question. It's powerful energy. Homophobic old people is powerful energy?

Yes. Let me tell you, ooh, ooh, this is a good story. This is me and when I was with my ex, Adrian, we're in the airport. it's like so early in the morning it's like six o'clock in the morning and uh we're there for a flight or whatever and there's this old like i think she was trinidadian yes um that sounds about right yeah a lady at the like you know making the bagels or making the breakfast and stuff like that and she's talking to us she's like oh it's so nice you girls together you know a buddy system is so important while traveling and she really like thought we were friends

and i had ordered a bagel with cream cheese and she was just talking and putting more cream cheese on the bagel and i know that cream cheese costs more money like she should have charged us extra but i was like i will be straight to get this bagel with more cream cheese with no payment so she thought you guys were friends but you guys were like hugged up on each other at the airport i mean when she started talking to us it was just like damn this is so uncomfortable like i wanted i wanted to be close to adrian but i immediately like backed away it was like yeah girl yeah friend discount yeah yeah and you're saying you need more of that energy yes yeah actually hmm interesting that's an interesting what terminal were you in sis what yeah interesting

Terminal five, babe. Actually, I have no idea what that means. But, okay. Okay. Well, obviously we have to talk about our expertises. No, we actually don't because I don't have one. Oh, okay. I was going to use your gay ass story to segue into another gay ass story.

Oh, okay. All right. That feels good. Rita Ora and Tessa Thompson. Thompson? thomas thompson there's a p in there thompson i would imagine thompson yeah well you know i don't know how to spell i i know the guy's name is really i always forget how to say his name the director actor he doesn't matter to be honest he remains nameless it's about the women no he's a

director yeah director and actor yeah and oh everything that i had to read about him was calling him her boyfriend slash her director uh it's tessa thompson's boyfriend no it's rita aura's boyfriend oh lord have mercy wow sis um which is the most i've ever talked about rita aura in my life yes she's three times she's making a comeback she's making a comeback this is how you do it this is how you splash back into the pool i don't know a single rita aura song no not one andrew resident resident beige gay i think black widow but i think that's an iggy azalea featuring rita aura definitely don't know it if it's an iggy side okay but marie explain everything that happened because we didn't even get into it oh all i saw

uh they were trending on twitter the other day or actually have been trending for the last couple days because they look like they're in a three-way relationship or at least the man who is rita's boyfriend was kissing her and kissing tessa and tessa and rita were very hugged up on each other um when he got up from the table um i saw a couple mimosas on the table so it's giving brunch um and uh now people are talking about poly relationships but also more importantly they talking about Rita because that's a name we have not said in a while I'm actually happy for her because you know press is press press press press press press Rita needs some press Rita needs so much press yeah she does so whatever she needs to do to get out there I I truly believe

that they were doing that for the camera i don't necessarily believe that they're in a three-way relationship um i don't think that they're doing anything for cameras i think i don't think it necessarily means that they're in a relationship but i do think that they are probably hooking up um i don't know what country or what island they were in but tessa is somebody who's pretty private about her business so um i do think that it's more than just a photograph i don't think they were posing tessa remember her hello janelle monet phase yeah and then i was reading the tweets and people were connecting lupita to it and i said oh lupita was with tessa no we're just friends she's like that's my sis yes yes yes yes yes that's what i would say if somebody was like

are you sleeping with this person i'd be like this is my friend this is but marie but like there's so many pictures of us together people like you guys are like you guys are in a relationship it's like no well that's because they know that you're a lesbian sis and they think that i might be that's all that is that's all that is he he was fully making out with both of them yeah i don't think that it was just pictures they i mean only maybe two of them people need press tessa don't need that when the when the corbel is in the system ain't no telling when the corbel yeah what's that is that the wine that they sell at cbs yeah that's cbs champagne that's the champagne that's actually good with mimosas well that's when i can remember good mimosas sydney do you

think you could ever do a poly relationship um i'm gonna say a strong no i am i'm a jealous person i actually am very jealous um i it doesn't seem like it at times but i'm extremely jealous and i my fear is feeling like the third will and that could possibly happen in a in a poly situation because i can be boring at times and lazy that's so interesting because in no now lens when carolina called you an auntie or said you give auntie energy you were like legit offended by that no what she was trying to do is say that how i dress sometimes is auntie and that is actually not true that is false the lie detector test said determine that was a lie it is a lie i don't know it's inconclusive on my side sis excuse me i mean i feel like you dress very fun

and young but i also do feel like i've in my brain i see you in in like a silk blouse with a matching silk pant what when yeah i don't know where are the photos maybe i'm thinking about the pictures that we took for macy's because that you did have on a silk suit sis um sis that that was that was for work that wasn't my own choices no i feel like you picked that out from the rack babe well they're um off the record on the record hey macy's we didn't have um all of the choices that i would have picked so from what i had that's what i that's what i could work with off the record on the record macy's y'all know what y'all did anyway just when she said when she mentioned your auntie clothes that's the outfit that popped

into my brain sis that's what I'm saying again that's not in my closet so that's not any of the looks that I came to New Orleans with or I'm at the net or any of the photos that I'm with you so you're wrong and I want an apology

I'm not apologizing Sydney you cannot demand an apology because somebody said something and then I repeated it on this podcast but you agreed I said that outfit came to mind that's what i said it's wrong the outfit was wrong actually well thank you it wasn't her outfit yeah i'm glad that i got paid for it sis so honestly now that i think about it i don't know if my money came in i'm gonna have to hit them back up hey babe i worked a job in 2019 i was

like girl that was like two years ago you checking my records and i don't think i see the money um i don't i i think poly relationships are for people who are so in tune and confident with themselves i i just could not it just it wouldn't feel right um i don't know if it's necessarily a confidence thing maybe it's for people who are bored maybe it's for people who want to date a man and a woman maybe it's you know maybe it's for people who have commitment issues Polly couples? And does Polly only mean three or can it be four?

Can it be five? It could be multiples. Yeah. You could do however many numbers you have. And for me, that feels like you gotta have a lot of sheets. You be like constantly switching sheets out. You gotta have a good decor.

I don't want to see somebody in a studio apartment having seven relationships. That just feels like you need to get your um priorities in order yeah um i don't know if poly equals good house but um maybe you're using less sheets because you have more houses to rotate where you end up in at night because maybe i'm in my apartment once or twice a week and then i'm at you know i'm at gerald's house a couple nights and then we at kim's house for the weekend yeah but poly means It's like everybody could be with multiple people.

Like it's all a six degree of separation type shit. Isn't that just an open relationship? Huh? That's just an open relationship. Right. That's a defined like who's in the relationship. Three, four, five. But it's those people that are in the relationship.

It's exclusively Polly. Yeah. Oh. That's what I understand. That's how I understood it to be as well. Okay. Exclusively Polly. Got it.

Yeah. Well, yeah, because, like, otherwise, we're not in a relationship. We just dating other people, and sometimes we hook up. Mm-hmm. I actually know a couple people who are poly. How's that going? Well, one of the couple is married, and the one person hooks up with one of the wives,

but not both of them. So maybe that's not poly. Maybe that's – is it open? That sounds open, sis. I'm confused but I think the other wife doesn't have anybody it's weird I don't know the other wife doesn't have anybody see this that doesn't work for me yeah because if you banging somebody else were banging them or I'm also banging somebody else yeah the problem with um the situation is I I just don't have the wherewithal to like spread myself that thin you see what I'm

i'm saying like if i if i'm hooking up i want to hook up with one person and they know what i'm about to give i'm not trying to give with that many people that feels like a lot of work exhausting it is i don't know sis i think i have i have the wherewithal to spread myself that okay well come on baby all right off the record off the record on the record i'm fully prepared for tuesdays with tyler wednesdays will wane thursdays maybe i'll rest thursdays because i have swim fridays with philip i i just feel like we we we did it before not we because not everybody went through a whole phase um mine is now but there are people who were hooking up all through their 20s all through their teens wait do you do you want tyler wayne and philip to also be

hooking up with each other yes because that's the poly i'm not saying that's poly you're saying open i'm not saying that i want to be poly that's not what i said okay i said i have the wherewithal to spread myself thin okay well i was hooked up with multiple people well when i was talking about spread myself then i'm talking about a poly relationship so that it was just a miss um we miscommunication but yeah and that's why you're dating that's why you're out here yeah but you know dating is actually it's something I like going on dates but men are dumb like some of y'all are really dumb like the other day I was in bed it was Saturday I woke up and I got a text from this guy who I've just been texting and he was like want to come over

and make out and I was like no not really it was 10 30 in the morning and I hadn't had breakfast yet and i've also never met this person so you you saying wanting to come over and make out when the sun is out like full sunlight that's the text that you send at night when people been drinking people are bored people already got residual makeup on from the the day that's passed no that's that's um hot person privilege they're like i feel like i look good enough to do this in the morning that is not no they are beyond they're delusional i know no no don't do that no yeah just because he was delusional because i said no i don't really want to come over here yeah well she showed me a picture of him and i actually think he's attractive he is he is

i think he would look good at 11 a.m okay on a saturday also is i feel like this is important question is it during the week like a weekday or a weekend no that's a weekend it was a saturday yes okay all right but i said i said no not really and he was like well i tried and i was like but did you did you try yeah that was it yeah because you sent a text like i had never even met this person yeah like we hadn't even we've never even hung out we've never facetimed i don't know if he he's missing a tooth in the back. I don't know how tall he is. I don't know how tight he wears his pants.

I've never met him in real life and then got that text and it was like, what do you think this is, Europe? I'm in New York. I'm not making those moves right now. Yeah, but I do give him props for being outlandish as he was

because it's like, you got to test the waters. I'm over here, when I was on the apps, I'm over here like, oh, high is not enough. high is corny I'm trying to think of all these like fun things to say to get someone's attention he's right away like you want to make out like that's I I think he was just trying to test like

let's see how far we'll go yeah yeah I mean honestly and truly I sent them his message to the group chat his picture to the group chat and Sydney and Carolina were like yes do it love it list it I mean it was like uh don't listen to Carolina um but if he had caught me if he had caught me on a better day no not that if he lived closer to my house i might have gone okay but he was it was like i'm not going all the way out there the uber's gonna cost how much yeah i'm not transferring trains i'm if he was like want to come over and make out i'll come get you that's a completely yeah that's hot yeah come get you i would have i would have been like oh yeah yeah i would have brushed my teeth and i would have been outside what he should have said is can i

make you breakfast can i pick you up and then let's make out right well that the the can i make you breakfast thing happened later because i said i haven't even had food yet that's wild and he said i can cook for you and i was like can you cook and he said yeah i can eat too and that's when i said let me check if the uber surge went down i can eat too i like that i mean the guy seems flirty like what do people want i mean listen it's this is my issue with like everyone it's like people make it so hard to actually break the ice that when the ice is finally broken you're exhausted because you you imagine how many people he probably had to message to get to you to say you want to make out at 10 30 a.m sydney so he had just been texting everybody since 9 45 do you

want to make out and he got to me and i almost said that's what you're saying yeah it does sound like that yeah yeah but you're not i know i should be at the top of the list i should be the first person you ask and then after i say no then you go down the list that's delusional i don't want that is delusional that you think especially in this climate i should be number one bitch what we almost died whoa whoa sorry excuse you if you are horny in the morning when you wake up i should be the first person you text not the fourth if i'm if i'm if you texted somebody else before me that means i'm runner up to some other lonely not as wop as me girl no you should be texting me first that's what i'm saying i'm sorry honey we're are we in a relationship i'm why why would you be

the first because i'm hot and my box is moist that's why girl that is i'm sorry that's not the grounds for number one if you said yes if you said that you're the most amazing person besides just sex i mean which you are wait but he's never even met marie it's just sex exactly it's just we're going off of what i look like and what you think i'm capable of in the bedroom you should be texting me first that's what i'm saying that's how confident i am in what i'm capable of you're saying i'm out of my mind because i think that it's fun and i'm hot yes that to me i think i deserve an apology no no no i'm not it's not just you it's not just you it's everybody like i mean I'm sure there's so many people who have

WAP and are beautiful and they still get cheated on left and right that is not grounds for number one. Sis I'm not talking about a relationship I'm talking about who are you swiping on on these apps that you're like oh we would have a good time together

oh she seems fun that's all I'm talking about looking at my profile looking at what I'm bringing to the table based on my personality it's like oh marie will be fun this morning if you text who who else could he possibly be texting sydney who else who in brooklyn from tinder girl the way these people be on the app all fucking day you be surprised i was at a comedy show and not one but three dudes were on hinge

During the comedy Hinge Yes It was crazy They trying to find wives At the comedy It was crazy I was like

I was like There's a full on comedian Giving jokes Going back to back With bits that they've been working on Through the pandem And this man is just With the fucking

Listen I've seen The first time I ever saw a dude on Tinder Was at a party Was at a party Yeah And the way he was swiping I thought he was playing a video game Yeah

I'm like cause there's all people around like actual women actual men in the room yes he was he was swiping so fast and i was like what game are you playing and he was like oh it's tinder and i was like you looking for hoes while there are hoes around yes that's that's how insane they are that's why i'm just saying i'm like to hold these people's attention i don't know i truly looking good and having wop is or the possibility of WAP if they've never even hooked up how do they know listen Sydney I mean I don't know how you think about you in the morning when you wake up but when I wake up in the morning I'm like at least at least 10 people maybe 10 is is generous at least 10 people woke up and my name

or my face popped into their brain and really I think that's how you should wake up in the morning sis you need to channel a little bit of that um you know some of that cocky energy into into your life it'll change your life your fridge will be cleaner yeah yeah i mean you know i actually finally cleaned my refrigerator so i am feeling more confident about myself i mean it's like how could you walk out confidently you know with your eyebrows drawn on knowing that you have the dingiest nastiest refrigerator for months can we talk about the fridge why was there so much stuff you are a family of one and a family and two two cats yeah why was your fridge so full i i am a hoarder marie i am a hoarder it's really hard for me to throw things out

and then things pile and like considering you know that all the sid can cook stuff it was like oh i was used to things being used and then i don't have any more of it but towards the end i was only doing it once a month so i buy all this stuff and you know all of it is not getting used so i have like onions and peppers and um random butters and sauces and doubles of things that i forgot that i had bought and yeah but sydney i also feel you were you were always over buying yes you can cook too absolutely yes you were always buying more than you had yeah yes truly truly it was like oh i'm gonna make this thing i'm gonna buy seven pounds of beef and it was like what yeah why it's true so you know the thing that i never bought enough of wings we would

always be out of wings well wings is you know yeah everybody's eating like six but it was so much and it was so nasty and it was just like the thing what's the what are some of the nasty what are some of the things you pulled out of the fridge that the listeners who maybe weren't aren't on ig missed oh there was some salmon teriyaki there was a couple bento boxes of salmon teriyaki yes the salmon teriyaki was gone but like you know the little the others like the tempura or like two uh california rolls like pieces of california roll it was god just i just don't understand why you weren't eating that stuff later in the day like i think this is my this is my issue right like i'll be hungry and then the food will get here and i'll eat some of the food

and it's like well i'm not i don't have a big enough appetite for everything so then i'm like i don't want to throw it away because i will be hungry again so i put it in the refrigerator and what oh not and left the house now we go into a show and i'm eating outside now so i don't need that food yeah but system bento boxes was from before oh my god don't do that yeah before we were outside your fridge looked like that the whole pandemic don't do that no how long were they in there the salmon teriyaki uh how about two weeks two to two to three weeks yeah that's good marie's marie's face i don't believe it i think that one of those boxes was the salmon teriyaki box from the langston no it's um i had of like there was like a pan of macaroni

and cheese but just the edges of the macaroni and cheese i had eaten all it was pretty much done but like oh my god the mold the mold oh my god the mold was so nasty and then like you know where you put your vegetables oh my god they they lifted up and screamed at me what you mean the draws at the bottom of the drawer yes yeah you had vegetables in your fridge stunned i love that thank you um but yeah i obviously i posted on insta stories for the content and it was so many people messaging like oh my god i i thought i was the only one so many a lot of them were beige but yeah uh well you did post some that were disgusting yeah like not only was the fridge full of stuff but the actual fridge was dirty nasty yeah it's

like babe it's leaking soaking wet that's that's shaking like a salt it is it is nasty but also i think it it sheds light on being like a high functioning depressed person where oh you can get up and do certain things and then there's other stuff that it's like you just it is such a chore to get to and it piles up and then you're like oh i'm that old lady that hoarders is coming in trying to like save the the 15 cats that are underneath and there's always a smush it's always a smushed cat behind the fridge yeah so like it's well it's a real thing i finally got my closet clean you know man he came and he cleaned out everything he threw everything away i have i have some boxes that's in the closet but for the most part all the clothes and everything is gone why

are the boxes in the closet why can't we just cut them up and fold them flatten them well there's a christmas tree that i didn't unbox yo sydney you got a christmas tree i didn't see a single christmas tree in that apartment i know for kwanzaa or what's the other one hanukkah i didn't see you got a full-size christmas tree yeah but it's an it's like you know artificial yeah i would hope so andrew andrew's looking like excuse me wait wait i would hope so so wait you had this when the holiday season rolled around but you didn't unpack it no right because then i went to la oh okay then that's understandable and i didn't want to throw it away because it's like well it's a whole tree yeah of course right but what was the return policy on the tree when you

got it well that's another thing it's really hard for me to return stuff it's very easy for me to return stuff that's where we're different because i will get my money back and i do not yeah i don't like clutter my apartment is too small for all of that clutter so i and i i have a mom who's a low key hoarder yeah um and every time i go to her house i'm trying to throw things away she'd be holding on to things like this is the newspaper that came out when obama was elected and it's like sis we have google we don't need this old ass newspaper she'll save the whole thing she'll be like oh this is when princess diana was murdered this is the girl there's a beanie baby we do not need all of these pages of newspaper that's how my auntie was that's how my auntie my uncles my mom

like i think it's hereditary like it's just in my veins to be an auntie yeah no a circle back No, bitch. Andrew. Andrew. Andrew, as much as I don't like silencing a white gay, I'm silencing you. Oh, no, you don't like silencing a white gay? By all means.

If that's the hill that you want to die on. What? You said that on my, Sydney, I think I deserve an apology. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. we've been shutting white men down since 1999 i know shout out to the beige male listeners yeah but it was scary it was definitely scary to see and like at the bottom of the refrigerator that like there's was another cat no dead fruit flies like it was bad it was bad you murdered the

fruit the fruit flies the fruit flies were so well fed in that refrigerator that they died well it was like a whole family of them at the bottom i think it's because in the summer you know i had a lot of them and then they would probably just get trapped you know what else i need to do the freezer the freezer you did the fridge but not the freezer oh girl i take step baby steps okay okay i gotta crawl before i walk okay okay i think that um i think it's important to talk about like how high functioning depression looks like because i feel like i have like a mild form of that with very basic things that i need to do in my apartment and i'll walk by them step over them i'll look at them and say i'm gonna do that tomorrow and then

days turn into weeks but also emails too emails oh you could do that as well with emails i am doing that with emails and you're like all i have to do is open it up and respond and for some reason my heart stops and i'm like i cannot not right now not today and then i'll get a an alert like oh this is from 15 days ago i'm like fuck and then i open it and it's like oh that has passed right google is annoying about that um you gotta dismiss the nudge replied 17 days ago follow up um no i'll open the email yeah i'll read it and i say oh i'm a i'm a respond and i i mark it as unread and i leave with how many unread you have oh a lot because i just keep getting more emails and not responding to the old ones but it's like when uh you know people

were messaging me, they're like, what is it that breaks you out of that terrible cycle? Because it's good to talk about the issues, right? But what are the solutions? How do you fight it? How do you combat it? And for me, right? Like I have to look at myself and say, is this a reflection of who i really am i am not this person that like ignores opportunities or that's not work stuff yeah that's not the person who i want to be right and then i say i looked in my refrigerator refrigerator yesterday and i said this is disgusting i have to put it on insta stories because that's the only way i'm gonna hold myself accountable and i was like and i was like no it was it no it was shameful marie i was very ashamed i i was like damn how are people going to look at

me this is nasty but i was like i also had to make fun of the fact that's like bitch you put you put on little rhinestones yeah perfectly on your fucking lids but you can't clean out your refrigerator you disgusting whore a word you disgusting whore i'm gonna put my name that in the ring for it oh yeah oh yeah that's a great title you're disgusting whore disgusting i love that that's great um but it was it was only for me to be like solution oriented like if i talk to myself like this this will fight the the urge to be like i'm just gonna lay back down and get get to it later you know so it's a major step sis yeah it is it was like but i i really was like damn are people going to think i'm crazy are people going to like not want to work with me

are people going to think all these bad things about me and it's like sydney because of your refrigerator says you think because of your fridge people are going to be like uh honestly i was about to offer her this gig but i see that she has a milkshake in there from seven weeks ago what delete the draft marie you've never like watched somebody on social media and you thought they were cool and then you're like actually I'm good on them never um I've seen people that I was like wow they're very like they seem cool or they're very attractive and then I hear them speak and I'm like oh that's true and they like go down a couple pegs in my brain but you really truly thought that it wasn't even like your fridge was dirty well

it didn't know it was like I didn't look dirty I didn't show you at the bottom of it oh yeah I'm sure there was like there was like pink juice at the bottom pink juice black juice it was like it was like peels of stuff that like disintegrated oh like garlic ma'am ma'am and it was like so wasteful and I felt bad because wasting like that guilt too of waste being so wasteful but I also was like truly truly this i i want to be honest like this is a disease a default like it sucks it's not like i'm purposely buying food and then throwing it in the trash this was like months of me like damn maybe i'll get to it no you know yeah but see i i hate throwing food away yeah so i am also and i'm the opposite of you right now my fridge i keep not going to the

supermarket so my fridge is basically empty um there's a couple bottles of weed tea a bottle of rose a bottle of vino verde it's it's bottles of things in there the idea people were sending me um fridges of like just beverages and i was like you're never home you're never home and then you have a few guests and that's why you have beverages it's no i'm i'm home i'm just like like like every day literally every day i wake up and i say i'm gonna have a salad tomorrow right tomorrow i'm gonna have it tomorrow i'm gonna make it to every single day and last night i made it i finally made a tiny ass salad and i was like wow oh my god we have to clap we have to snap and clap a tiny salad wait speaking of tiny salads um summit walker

had a baby and she's feeding it shrooms hemp seeds and honey that's what the the internet is saying i know that's the photo that she posted in her stories blending it blending it up and she said breast milk was toxic well if you know what if you believe that you're a toxic person maybe that's what she thought she's like i am bad so i don't want to feed my baby this energy but people are mad because they're saying that the baby's way too young you're not supposed to give a baby honey before the age of one apparently the baby's so tiny yeah the baby's tiny summer baby what are you doing summer baby walker is the baby gonna be able to walk like what's going on like she it just it's scary but also it's it's it's a sensitive subject right because which part

I am not a mother. I'm not a mother, but I know some of the things that my mom did, I'm sure somebody could have been like, that is wrong. That's not how you treat a baby. Da-da-da-da-da-da, you know? But was your mother feeding you? Because the other ways that you discipline and raise your kid, everybody has an opinion about how everybody does everything.

And you know people love shaming a woman. Right. But the food thing, sis, you have breast milk. or you can buy formula yeah you not doing that we're blending the hemp seeds that i put in my smoothies to make me less anxious like can a baby even like what are the hemp seeds doing to the digestive tract like i truly i thought hemp was good for like your hair and lotion so i i i don't even know the purpose of hemp i don't have them in my fridge anymore wait no maybe i do hold on it might be the only thing in there marie you should show us a show us your fridge

i'll show you my fridge if andrew shows us his fridge too oh yeah andrew what the fuck is in your fridge i just cleaned it yesterday when i saw your stories so it is andrew what did you throw away you it's a new fridge though yeah you just got there it is a new fridge but like i guess like recently like going out to like more like restaurants and everything you had chick-fil-a in there okay got it yeah expose me um but like you know when they come to your table and you didn't finish everything they're like do you want a to-go box and it's like you feel like bad if you don't say yes because it's wasting food but i know by taking it home it's never gonna get touched you gotta give it to a homeless person that's what i do yeah but like

i feel like every time every time that you're looking for a homeless person you can never find one yeah but then you gotta leave it in a homeless hot spot babe you gotta be like oh it's gonna be they be gathering here let me leave it here with a fork and a knife and a little napkin set i will become aware of where the homeless hot spots are i want to say in new york maybe i'm not walking enough but i've been in new york and i'm this is the less i've ever seen homeless people compared Compared to L.A., I rarely see any homeless people in my neighborhood. And I would say there's parts of, you know, East New York that's very, like, low income and dingy. But there's homes all around, like, where I'm at, and I do not see homeless people.

Well. I might see a drunk, you know, Jamaican man talking to himself. Okay. But he's not homeless. Zaga, zaga, zaga, zaga. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. um yes but la is the homeless capital of the world i feel like mainly and or in part because

you know mayor giuliani like bust them out there um the mayor of new york that's what they claimed he did he just gave all the homeless people in times square like a ticket a one-way ticket to la plus you know people go to la to be stars and sometimes the pressure gets too much for them or i don't know people stop taking their meds or people make a they go to la with a backpack and a guitar and yeah and it's not what it what it's not giving what it meant to give so um but i don't like throwing food away so i always take it and but i'm usually gonna eat it if i take it but if If I know I'm not going to eat it, then I look for a homeless person. Have you tried walking through Penn Station, babe?

Facts. That's a good place. Times Square. Times Square. Grand Central Terminal, babe. Yeah. Andrew Yang's favorite subway station, Times Square. Yeah.

Any bus stop. Any bus stop on the Lower East Side. You know what's different? A lot more women are proposing to the men in their lives. Can we talk about this? Sydney? Okay, Marie. Well, I think it's probably different because you date women.

So would you propose to your, like, partner? Or would you just assume they were going to propose to you? I mean, say, for instance, I had, like, I got all this money or whatever. And I felt, like, very successful and content with myself. I would propose. Okay. I wouldn't get on my knees. Why?

I'm not subscribing to that getting on your knees shit. I don't even want whoever's going to propose to me to get on their knees. You don't need to get on your knees. Open the box and show me. Beautiful ring. Oh, my God. Everybody's around. Thank you so much.

This is gorgeous. I don't need the knee thing. What is the knee thing about? Who started that bullshit? So you just want them to slide the ring across the table? No, girl. I don't need to get on your knees. No.

No. No. You can hold my hand. you can say your speech and have dignity and hold my hand it's fine well I think that's you want her to have dignity because it's a woman I want the man to get on his knees like he does in all of the movies in all the rom-coms I need I need to be like oh like what are you tying your shoe real slow I mean I don't even know if I want to get married but I know that when you propose to me whether I say yes or no I need you to get on your knees don't look across the table at Chipotle and

be like you know uh i've been having a lot of fun these last couple of weeks and uh weeks oh god she's that good she's that good folks they're proposing after a couple weeks in chipotle got it well i mean ariana grande just got married and wasn't she with her dude for like a couple of months like people people move at the pace they want to move and sometimes they'd be like when you know you know yeah but she's all i mean she was constantly getting engaged so right but she's actually she's just that she's just that girl she's just that girl no but she's actually like wifed up yeah no no i know that i know that but i'm saying after the third engagement i think i think it's time to be like we're gonna really do this the punch card yeah yeah the punch

card um i hope that i i hope to be a woman that's engaged multiple times i think that you marie that's for my future that's whoa i this is the first time i heard this this is that i want to so you want to be poly poly engaged no no no no i just want to be like because like j-lo's been engaged and married a couple times laurie harvey's been engaged before a lot of people just been engaged and it's like yeah let's get married and then you start to plan stuff and then you're like or this is how i think it'll happen for me is i'll be like do i really wanna plan a wedding no well you get someone you get someone to plan it for you right but then you look at somebody one day maybe you get up you wake up before them and they're sleeping next to you with their mouth

open and maybe they got a little crust in their eyes and you're like do I want to spend the rest of my life with him and then you brush your teeth and you're like I don't know and then breakfast he's chewing you like he's chewing too loud I don't like how he moves his lips when he reads his text messages I don't know but like well that's when you fall that's when you know you've fallen out of love with somebody I'll say that when you are in love with someone you can't see any of that shit but soon as that that like that shoe drops that one shoe just bloop that steve madden just plop you're like yeah you're like uh i fucking hate your forehead like right your breath stinks when you can tell that they breath stink that's when you know the veil of love has

just been removed the veil of love okay i'm also putting that down as title the veil of love it's true it's true every time i've like have been out of it with someone i started noticing the things that i just was not seeing at all and i've and i feel that way about friends too like i know when i'm like okay the friendship might have ran its course when i'm thinking these things about them oh yeah well i mean we grow up and we we become wiser we're less patient people yeah every day that we're alive we're getting we're turning we're a little bit closer to being a cranky old person yelling at a kid for being on the lawn like every day we get closer and closer to that but i think um i don't know i don't think the crazy thing is

marie you've had more patients now since like our friendship i will say that i'll give you that you give more grace now and you pause before you say something sometimes and you're like now I don't know if you're doing that to everybody else but I know with me you do that with everybody else you're saying it's the flip of the lip well sometimes I pause because I forgot what I was about to say and other times I pause because

it's like is that what I want to say right so that but yeah I mean I'm not saying everybody the older you get the angrier you get I said I mean wiser so you can either keep living your life and reacting to things the way you've been reacting to things and

fully turn into your mother and father or you can you know talk to lydia once a week and and fix what needs to be fixed um but i sometimes i'll sit and i'll be like oh like i should be nicer to my friends or oh i'm not that nice to my sister i could be nicer to her so you know i mean she's not that nice to me but um i don't know it's that some like the same way you got up and you were like i have to clean my fridge i will stand up sometimes and be like i need to be i need to think more about what i'm about to say really not like specifically that but like i'm like i'm like specifically give me an example where you're like i need that because the people want to know marie well i can't give you an example

but what i can say is i also there's less things that i care about now like i know what i don't give a damn about so it's like sometimes it's not worth it it's not worth it to get into it with somebody because you're like who cares yeah truly at the peak of my like the center of my being that's what it is i don't care you don't care but that doesn't make you mean and i actually want to change the narrative that marie faustin is not mean that's the title marie faustin is not mean you're not mean i think that you're very light-hearted with things and people are not used to people being so free with their words and that is um triggering so it's just quick to be like you're mean but like over the years i don't know i think you were maybe mean before but definitely

not now wow sydney the veil of love the veil of love i'm being i'm being so i see i see with my bare eyes real mean people yes just not good-hearted yes just like has no regard for anybody except themselves especially in this industry yeah it is wild it's wild how like people will talk to the people who work for them or the crew on a set yeah um or sometimes you'll be out and you'll see somebody's eyes just shifting around the room they're just looking for somebody more famous than you to talk to and it's like girl none of those people want to talk to you what do you mean i said mean yeah yeah not responding to your friends but then like you're commenting on like every celebrity's page that does not give a fuck about you

come on now you're doing you're like get it together right or not supporting your friends But quick to post a photo that you took with somebody that is like a degree of separation from you, but you're like, you know what I mean? Like there are people who just want to be adjacent to fame or they think that when people see them with people who are famous or whatever, successful. Adjacent to fame is a great title, too. OK, we have four options now. OK, we're working. We're working. We're working.

We're working. I understand. content we're doing we're doing what needs to be done for oh i'm not i'm not complaining i love when there's options but it sounded like a complaint babe oh no i'm not filing a complaint not being mean um you can continue something you want to take up with hr babe just want to make sure forever dog does not have an hr department but yeah a lot of podcasts don't to be honest um okay can you read the titles for us and we can decide which one we want sure um they are you disgusting whore um the veil of love marie faustin is not mean

or adjacent to fame honestly these are all books that i would read these are so good i feel like we've we have like 10 more minutes left i i feel like there's another title there might be another one there's a title on the horizon sydney yeah i think that's a good title on the horizon is great too title on the horizon love i love that wow and you know we take a screenshot and we have to post so people can get yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah um okay should we read um any of these questions that we've yes yes please for the pod yeah we appreciate you my illiterate my illiterate no my literate babe i'm like illiterate no no squeeze me um okay wait uh writing to the pod okay let's see there's a photo attached okay great um first of all can i just say that people

be people have been showing up to all of the niche shows a lot of people who listen to the podcast and y'all are y'all are freaking wow y'all are dope we love y'all so much like y'all really come out and the touching things that you say oh my god truly i'd be like you know we show up on this podcast some of us both of us most of us um like right before we start to record and we sometimes don't have anything to talk about we just talking about how we feel so to hear that y'all are we got you through the pandemic yeah i mean for me it's comedic but i love that for us i love that for us um okay it's so funny it's funny i mean it's great too but it's like what yeah also someone left a comment on um itunes and they said that we're the most underrated

podcast and i totally agree i agree but also we're we're pretty like we're kind of casual we're not like oh my god we need to get the biggest celebrity we need to which is probably not best in terms of marketing for us but we're just so chill should we work on that marie work on what being less chill i think being motivated to post constantly and be better about promoting the podcast yeah we should probably work on that you know yeah but also it's like sometimes I go through like these phases of like social media is too much work and it's just like I'd rather just like not do anything on it but that's the high functioning depression in some of us or especially me it's like I can get on there but I cannot post on there

right or I can like see something and engage with it but then I can't do my own shit yeah sick yeah it's sick it's like I feel embarrassed to promote myself it's easier to promote a friend really you feel embarrassed promoting yourself I do like sharing a picture sharing one of the 12,000 selfies in your phone you feel embarrassed to like post one of those is what you're saying no I think that's so easy because that's like very surfaced I think like to promote my actual content or um like you know i had a clip for comedy central and i just i i hated myself it's it's sad to say out loud i was like i hate i hate every little thing about me about the the set or about what you looked like in the video no the set just me i was like i am annoying i was

like i don't see any good in me it was sick like i was like what were you about to say i said sis i think you gotta get you a little lydia sis it's time yeah well i just got a response back to uh sherry and she is unavailable but she gave me a list of people to contact so there we go right because i mean yeah you're doing the antidepressant thing but i think that talking about how you feel and why you feel it is probably gonna be more helpful than just sitting in your house and hating everything about what you're saying you know but also like yeah we watch these videos that they post of us that we stressed about before the shoot and stressed about on the day of and like found an outfit for and then they post it and you're like first of all I felt funnier and I've

never been less funny than I am in this video that's how I feel anytime you know certain networks post me on their page which is crazy because I look at I mean I it's probably just the veil of love that I like everything I see like your stories anything about I'm like the first person to like like yell out loud I'm like she is so funny and likable I want to hang out with her right now like that's when I see you that is definitely the veil of love because everybody is not saying that that's great no that's not true marie you have so many like diehard fans sydney i'm saying everybody is not saying that there are people who support me and they love what i do and they recognize me in new orleans and that's fantastic but

there are maybe i don't want to quantify it but i'm still i'll watch stuff and i'll be like i'm funnier than that why did i save jokes that's the thing saving jokes you're like oh i want to do funny stuff but i want to do my really funny stuff on the tonight show i want to do my really funny stuff for netflix and then it's like you just never do those jokes like girl what what is this like crap that you're putting out you you will come up with funnier stuff later eventually that that's my biggest problem is i keep trying to save jokes and it's like just do it you know yeah i hear you sis i thought that your video was funny sydney i and i was there when you recorded it and i laughed so i saw it and i i immediately threw my phone i threw my phone and

i was like the only good thing about this is that fucking coat that's a lie the coat is it's a nice coat though yeah okay wait here here we go here we go here we go um andrew did you have anything that you wanted to add to what you just heard oh i feel like it's like hard to say because i'm not obviously doing the same thing as either of you but it's just like it's always difficult to hear when you guys are like feeling like not that confident about the work that you put out because i see obviously that it's it's great it's great content i'm not just being facetious and it's also like i see everybody else is also obsessed with you so it's just like it's it's just disappointing to hear that you um you don't see the same thing but it's like obviously we all

have those days and it sucks but it's just like yeah but focus on yeah as a creative though we are our own worst critics that's just what it is across the board so we're already critiquing it differently than the other people who are just watching it to enjoy it we're watching it to see what's wrong with it yeah of course i'm watching it to be like all of the things that i missed all the things that i did not say um but also it's like i laugh at things that i do and say all day long i'm literally most of my day is me sitting in this house laughing at myself so so to watch a video and not laugh once it's like what why did i say that like who is that why why did i do that you know what i mean and it's like it just it sucks because you're like i should be more confident

in this because i radiate confidence on like usually but at the end of the day i'll see you know that stuff and i'm like i just want to you i just want to men in black erase everybody's memory of me and my jokes so that i can start over yeah um okay and then black erase it but i mean you could do the next best thing and just call your manager and be like tell him to take it down that's how that's how you men in black erase when you have management um oh my you have that my laptop is about to die so yeah let's talk this out it's at 12 we have time let me lower the brightness um yes here we go um this is from john watson i guess this is the pod's email if if not i'm sorry for spamming you marie it went to

my inbox um i'm a very new listener i think i started in march okay so just got here still got the new listener smell um i found out about you guys through sydney who i saw through a couple of other podcasts and on baited baited whose podcast is baited no baited is z-way's um show i'll bait it okay um it seems like you guys all know so many under the radar talented and funny people many of the same people who know others at the same fame level or slightly higher okay all right where is this yeah where is this going okay i'm about to read it okay okay how do i get like that oh i live near atlanta and want to be a showrunner one day probably for sitcoms i write scripts i went to film school blah blah blah i'm on track to make something great okay tyler perry

jr love this for you but how do i meet all the medium stars like you guys no offense before they become big stars i think of your friends lacey mosley io adebari and z way who are blowing up right now i want to be in situations where i can know and use those types of people to help my career and help their careers as well okay um where do I find those comics uh is it as simple as making a casting call am I overthinking it I'm sorry if this came out the wrong way I'm grateful for any help that you can give um it's more in that but I'm tired of reading um babe hold on hold on marie andrew what do you because you're this is impartial well how do you feel about this email i almost like don't i want this to be cut i don't you want it to be no no no no no this is

real i just feel they hit send so they stayed in there yeah um i feel like they were like they were dragging some of your past guests i don't know a little bit with like the medium stars and also i don't i don't know i didn't really like the way that john was um saying like using you as a connector i don't know what do you think sydney the first thing you need to learn about the industry is the way you ask for things this was not the best way to ask for help because not only are you not acknowledging really the people who you're asking for help you're you're lumping us in with these people where you're like i know i want to meet those people and work with those people you didn't say hey i want to be a showrunner and work with you girls

you're like how do I get connected with these other people exactly so it's a slap it's a backhanded compliment because you're like well you guys are kind of in the the running but I want to meet more of those people yeah this is this is what I got from that we the way that you meet people in any industry that you work in is you all start around the same time yeah you work together on projects you build a rapport as they start to book things everybody on that level starts to book things and then you are a quote medium medium what did it say medium under the radar medium girl i can't even yeah medium stars like you guys all the medium stars all the medium stars have been working for close to the same amount of years yeah so as

we as we spend more time working and people start to book things it's not because jay what's his name john john you you got to start at the beginning you still have to start at novice level whatever whatever it is that you're doing and as you you start to become successful the people around you will also be more successful yes and isa ray said she doesn't want to work up she wants to work around so the people that she's with that's who she wants to bring to the top she doesn't want to be at the bottom in a reach for the people at the top because that that doesn't that's not real that's right clout chasing exactly it's legit just talking about this yeah that's what that is like the people you're reaching up to work with people who are

more famous or more successful or have more years in they get nothing out of working with you nothing literally nothing yeah they're working with the people who are on the same level as them and that's what you need to be doing mr mr dude man okay yeah uh yeah i i totally agree i just yeah you just need to just not be thinking of higher up you need to start at the same level because there are going to be you know the laces the ios those people in your presence and they will if they like you i'm sure you're a very nice person to be around so it's like okay they'll want to work with you if you have that relationship well are you are you a nice person i don't know maybe it doesn't i mean you're like i'm sorry this came out wrong but you i tell people because i

have to do this to myself write something and then read it out loud how does it sound when you're saying it it doesn't sound like rude or stepping over boundaries we don't know you from adam did he even send a picture he did he did send a picture okay all right he said i'm only 24 despite my stature okay you guys are kind of underrated with how sweet sydney is and how smart marie is i hope oh sorry i should have read the rest of the email it says wait hold on it says i hope to cast you guys one day because you're both so talented yo i should have okay we dragged it we dragged it Marie we dragged oopsie daisy but he should have started up top he should have started up top with I would love to work with you guys right compliment sandwich you got to start

with the good yeah put the crap in the middle then end and strong and strong yeah here's some of my work here's some of the things here's like give us something that we can click on and be like okay let me check your stuff out right right right cut all the middle stuff out about like medium celebrity like no no no no no no i leave the shade to us you don't you don't need to you don't need to be shady oh my god what a nice guy my laptop was dying wow i took that personally what his message yeah his message i'm over here like i don't think i hate what i look like i hate everything he's like yeah um can you introduce me to your other famous friends he wasn't asking for an introduction he was saying how does he get from where he is to people who are

i guess at that level of about to pop off yeah it's like babe you gotta put in the 10 000 hours and while you're putting in the work to become a good showrunner or script writer the people that you take these classes with will be the people that you end up working with in the future yeah because they they see what you do and they're always looking and they're like they always want to work with someone totally and like always be down to just like do whatever project with whoever it doesn't matter like these sort of statuses it's yeah it doesn't mean anything like people that you collaborate with right um yeah i mean that's all that it is it's nothing more nothing less but you have to be nice and we we did see that you're nice at the very end of the email so

um andrew you before we go i guess yes um you have a podcast i do week of the week i do i was looking at clips yeah i was watching your stories the other day and um it was about how when you watch those shows and there's like a big audience or a big ass crowd that most of the time the audience is not real it's true okay so like in the early seasons of glee they would have like actual full audiences but later on in later seasons then budget cuts or whatever they had to fill in half the audience with dummies and you pause for one second you could see you see that there's not real they're not real people uh and so we had one of the cast members for this week's episode and it was fun to talk about that

Gleek of the week beach Gleek of the week beach Sydney is there something you want to leave the listeners with before we get out of here any final thoughts or words yeah we are underrated but I think

we are underrated but people see where we're going but like it's just easy to wait for someone to pop off and then hop on the bandwagon than to stay while they're kind of like in that gray area so it's like i see the people who are like sticking by us right now like i'm not gonna forget those

fucking people but people are sticking by you yeah but the people who catch on after the fact but it's like when you're like when you're a professional athlete and you make it big into the whatever basketball football whatever and you're with the girl that you dated in high school versus when you're famous and rich and then like all the groupies pop up yeah and they're just like they just want to be around you they just want to you know they want to ride your coattails they want to drink in your section they just want to be there and it's like it's there's i don't know it's better to be with people who actually want to work with you and actually want you to be around so you know that's it but i just said i just can't fucking wait when the time does come oh man

i can't which time when our time comes pop off what you gonna do sis i can't say it's not for me to say but just just know that well i think sydney i think you could benefit from we talked about this before an unfollow spree i really again i cannot stress enough your following number is it's too much so i think that when you pop off i think that's the first thing you need to do he's saying you need to do a purge bed a cleanse let them know you didn't make the cut yeah you're right you said it's too many people that you follow well we've talked about this before you know our good sis is a supportive social media um user so it is what it is i'm the sweet one maria and you're the smart one but i think it's just like the refrigerator you just

gotta smart sweet and smart um okay well that's it for me babe yeah me too sweet and smart yeah we love that make sure you rate and you comment and you subscribe on other people's phones who are around you that are unlocked when they get up to go to the bathroom yeah and if you think we're so underrated like are you fucking reposting us are you telling people to listen to the pot like the fuck right like the other day this guy this we were at the at&t store and this guy was like um uh what's your instagram and i added myself and then i added the unofficial expert so good job i should have gone if i was smart i would have gone to his itunes and i would have subscribed but good job sis i didn't do that yeah so you know if you if you're if you're going to

be going through your man's phone anyway just subscribe to the podcast if we're underrated it's really y'all it's your fault and you let the people know yeah thank you sydney thank you all right well bye friends love you bye forever dog this has been a forever dog production the unofficial expert is executive produced by brett boehm joe cilio and alex ramsey Senior Producer, Tracy Soren Produced by Andrew McGuire Cover Art by Sandy Honig To listen to this podcast ad-free, sign up for Forever Dog Plus at foreverdogpodcasts.com slash plus.

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