MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - Don't Tell Nobody

Episode Date: January 22, 2021

Sydnee and Marie recap this past week of stories. From the inauguration to lesbians being deported from Bali. Enjoy!----Listen to The Unofficial Expert Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus:https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus----BUY UNOFFICIAL EXPERT MERCH:https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-unofficial-expert-podcast----FOLLOW THE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT:https://www.instagram.com/UnofficialExpertFOLLOW SYDNEE:https://www.instagram.com/JustSYDbwhttps://twitter.com/justsydnycFOLLOW MARIE:https://www.instagram.com/Reeezyhttps://twitter.com/MsReeezyFOLLOW ANDREW:https://www.instagram.com/mcgui_guySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Forever! Dog! Wow, okay. Hello. Man, I have not been this tired in my entire life. Not gonna lie. Tell them why you're tired, friend. Just walk through it, because I think that people want to know, you know, how hard it is that you work.

Why are you so tired? I just, I have really bad sleeping habits and schedule, and, you know, it's a lot of sleeping in the day, and a lot of staying up until the sunrise. And then it's a toxic cycle that I'm trying to get out of. Are you? Yeah. Okay. All right.

It's difficult. Yeah. But I've been having the hardest time. It sucks. It's just like because I've spent a legit whole year just laying on my couch and then maybe getting up and going to my bed, I'm just out of whack. My whole body's out of whack. I was used to going, going, going, going, going, not resting,

and now it's rest, rest, rest, rest, rest. I'm so tired of resting that I need more rest. you're so well rested that you tired yes but in that resting sydney phase you don't feel like i should get up and do something um i i would say that it's it's partial depression because you know i will say the meds are helping me um i don't know exactly what it's helping me do besides you know wake up and and not feel like the world is on my shoulders but i will say that uh yeah the motivation is completely gone yes let me tell you how i'm sitting at sydney's house right now we're doing this uh episode live

and live in color in person and we shot some stuff today you know content queens we also did a patreon shout out to that um and sydney was on the phone and i watched her go from literally fully charged to 15 battery she said yeah maria i need it we need i need a minute i need to i need 15 minutes and it was like somebody flipped a switch and you were just done and I want to say that we did the same amount of work today so I'm I'm a little bit confused but also Sydney I spoke to you last night and you were like if I go to bed right now I'll be fine I'm going to bed right now that was at like 1 45 in the morning and I said are you gonna go to bed right now you were like yes and you hung up you're like as long as i don't go to bed by around six i'll be fine

what time did you go to bed last night friend or this morning six o'clock in the morning for sure six o'clock in the morning without and you were talking to somebody you were doing something you were scrolling through the interwebs what was you doing okay i'm not gonna lie so i don't even really watch like tv anymore i go on facebook and facebook okay tbt yes i go on facebook and i look at videos on facebook so i will watch like proud boy videos no like like lifestyle videos like from like bloggers or people who are in makeup um people trying out different products so you did that yesterday from two to six a.m i marie it's odd but i'm not gonna lie like it's just i can do it for hours right but you could have not done that for them four hours yesterday you could you

could have done that today like right now yeah no i i yeah yeah you're right you drag drag me bitch just drag me on the fucking pod i mean i this is what i'ma say there are multiple days in the week when we don't have anything to do those are the days to do four hours of gem encrusted daytime makeup look video that's what that is for but like you know today was a work day sis yeah you knew i was dragging my haitian body over here and you're like i need to take this hard-ass nap on this soft-ass beanbag well marie you came here late so you tell us how it is to you know actually when you know when you're supposed to be somewhere but you don't you know what's the question i'm sorry what's the question you know when you're supposed to

do something and then you you know what time you needed to leave today you said yes sydney i knew what time i needed to leave today we were supposed to start filming at 11 15 i walked in at what time 11 23 yes so please don't act like i was hours like i had you waiting you was tapping your foot when i got here you was still setting up the industrial ring light okay so yes i said that this year i was gonna be i don't do that marie when you talk sydney i legit my uber dropped me off at 11 23 i was supposed to be here to start shooting at 11 15 so what time were you supposed to be here 11 i said i was gonna be here at 11 o'clock i did say that so let the record show i was 23 minutes late but but i went to bed at oh my god i went to bed at three o'clock in the morning

and i was up at 9 20 or something like that because i was like okay well when i get back home i'm gonna just take a nap that's what naps are for yeah but that's what naps are for that's what naps are for I'm not even a nap person if I'm up in the day I'm just up and then I'm like I'm gonna go to bed early and then I try but that's when Sydney be like I'm gonna call Marie

and I be like sis I'm doing work fake work but I did do work yesterday you did I wrote a little short story what'd you say so I was watching Issa Rae's masterclass last night and the episode that I watched

is about creating conflict and she talks about how in the pilot episode she had to create realistic conflicts for her characters so do you remember the pilot of insecure of insecure or her web series of insecure um she was working at uh we got you right so she like there's a conflict at work she don't really like the people she work with right there's a conflict with lawrence because he's like in the house sleep eating cereal right so she was like fake trying to break up with him and it was her birthday yeah and then the conflict with molly was when she got on stage and she she sang the broken pussy song and molly was like my life is funny to you and he was like well the pussy might be maybe it's maybe it's really smells maybe it's

what did she i don't remember the exact rap but so she created those three like little conflicts so the assignment at the end of the class was write a story with like a realistic conflict but in like an everyday situation right like you know maybe a conflict that you would experience at the bank so i my conflict was um my main character landlord was knocking on the door because my landlord had knocked on my door um she didn't she hadn't paid her rent and it was the 17th of the month but that's not you because your landlord would never let you do she pull up on the first at 9 a.m yeah it's like sis get some rest she would never let me not pay my rent on the first or the second she's annoying um anyway so like i sat and wrote for like an hour

and this was all at like midnight last night but i have been sitting on my beanbag shout out to the beanbag people um i had been sitting on it for four hours wasting time on instagram and twitter but i did that sis i did that from like five to nine from like 5 p.m and 9 p.m just in case y'all don't know our girl is viral okay i mean virals the virials i mean that is work too what well that's why i let myself not really do that much yesterday because i was like well i worked people did see my work we watched the inaugural together um the inauguration the inauguration and uh so dry it was well it was giving very uh you know baby shower at the buildings you know center center for the people right the the community center for the building

um but i didn't see any burberry button downs that is peak baby shower baby daddy blouse you know the baby the burberry print blouse yeah but it's it's just like the like the people were nice but the it just didn't look good the the capital has looked very dingy since the supremacist ran through it's really like i was like y'all couldn't hit no gloss on it y'all couldn't spray it down like some oil she gets some paint something like it just it just looked like they should have moved the event somewhere else right right right switch venues maybe done it at like a like a like a country club or something yeah um all the women were giving us monochromatic coat looks yeah you know michelle obama came you know she had maroon five she maroon five everything maroon down yeah

but you know obama hadn't seen her scalp in several days that the curls were pinned she took him out in the limo you know she took him out in the car uh whatever whoever did her hair props to you because you could tell like it's just whatever the the texture of it like it was just flutin that flutin the night before it was given it was yaki it was given yaki it wasn't given peruvian it didn't seem like the texture didn't match no it blended very well it was really really nice um and there was like a little highlight shout out to sydney with a with a little ombre over here yeah it looks good um and then obama looked great sydney just kept saying he got a chemical peel he did i don't know if he did or he didn't i'm telling you he did marie first of all for

your face to shine like that you could put a handful of vaseline on your face and it'll be that glossy no he looked like he had brand new skin mind you let's fast let's let's rewind back eight months ago haggard beat the skin i don't know about eight months ago yeah eight months ago he looked tired sis we going to the inauguration i'm showing up in my new face because the old president is a jackass you i'm i'm coming to slay i'm coming to slay yeah i'm like yeah botox me in the car while i'm riding shotgun i don't know if it's botox but i'll definitely i definitely feel like he you know he went to the spa he could have been a he could have had a steamer in the in the he steamed his face in the morning yeah you know who could have used his steam Bernie oh my god

Mr. Sanders he really really came up and was like well he a nigga damn like I'm here but not really Bernie said I'm coming but I'm coming to pick up my mail in my office and I gotta drop some stuff off on the way home he said I hope this ends before the post office closed right he said I gotta pick up a prescription at the Duane Reade yeah and he also looked like he brought his own chair he did look like one of those soccer moms that like unfolded with the little cup holder on the side yeah um bernie put on his warm coat not his cool coat he said y'all doing what peacoats nah no did he have on marils oof asics i don't know no he had he had a hard bottom on but it just i mean he was like i'm not buying anything new for this i feel like he had on a brown dress

shoe well if you think about it he's like i ran for president did not win now i have to see somebody else get like sworn in no he's not he's like no that excuse don't work here it does work doesn't because hillary clinton was there in her finest suge knight suit i don't i think she had on purple as well she definitely didn't get a trim she did not trim her hair she said i'm coming in this mullet y'all getting this mullet that's it she's a chemical peel no you're getting my regular in the house face yeah she might have put some cocoa butter on her face because bill might have had that lying around um they're still together they might honestly they give me sleep in separate bedroom energy yeah they're they have to be separated they have to they're just together

for appearances there's no way that they live in the same building but when you think about what they looked like I don't know I guess he was president like 20 years ago at this point more than that can you imagine Bill and Hill having sex no she does she's definitely

looks like she's penciling you in and then canceling 30 minutes before it happens I don't know Hillary Clinton look like you put a couple soft blonks in her and she might eat your booty I don't think so not one bit the what she has been through absolutely not she was been she's been

publicly embarrassed like the united nations know so you're trying to tell me that you don't think monica lowensky is having good sex because she was shamed in 1996 yeah monica lowensky is having cute sex no i disagree she doing splits on the dicks she's definitely she's done a ted talk about it it ruined her life sure but that doesn't mean it ruined her sex life if she had played her cards right she could have been playmate of the year that year oh my god marie get out of my house i think bill clinton is good at cunnilingus he looked like he i'm messy i don't really think he's doing anything after that happened it was like lights out for him i mean he looks terrible but i think that you know some people have a certain

a special set of skills and i think bill is good at giving head and i think monica lewinsky probably has like a sex dungeon in her house a room for sex it got swings in the ceiling mm-hmm Hillary yeah I don't you you right I don't really get sexual energy from her at all yeah I don't I don't really see it it's just um you know I'm glad that they showed up I'm glad people came I'm glad that security was packed packed packed to the brim made sure that it was no bullshit was about to go down everyone i mean the performances i could have done without all of them except amanda um oh my god girl first of all lady gaga showed up in a hunger games dress i don't know if you saw the big ass oh yeah i saw this it was like a

mermaid you know she she had the i guess for her that was like her inauguration clothes yeah but it forgives it gave me really mtv awards like it just it didn't seem like it made sense for what we were doing yeah but it's it's gaga sis i feel like yeah for her it was like okay this is like a parent teacher conference yeah gown um j-lo came let's get loud let's let's not she was like uh lisa ray move over because i'm here am i all white right she was like what are you guys wearing purple i'm gonna wear purple too and then she showed up in an all white cape moment her hair looked good she had on chanel jewelry she was dripped in gold and pearls and stuff but it was like why are you here well the thing is is that i told you she has a new uh skincare line and she's

been doing she's been doing the press for that like around the world so the press for that her team is so good that the press for that is she does the inauguration yeah look underneath your seats there's a j-lo glow underneath each each seat when i tell you rihanna really got these girls together because like obviously all of these celebrities are always trying to find ways to make money outside of what their thing is acting or singing whatever but rihanna and her fenty skin and fenty beauty all of these girls that have been around because j-lo's been around since the 90s yeah and yeah her skin looks good but it's like sis you have been spending money on like virgin blood and caviar to like put it on your face um when you posted something i think it was you

um it was a video of j-lo doing her like makeup removal skincare routine oh my god it was so bad her skin she looks like a completely different yeah white lady a white woman and the acting was awful like guys this this is the best thing i've ever had on my skin well it's j-lo so the acting was gonna be bad no but it was not believable at all and it was just like whenever people come out with skincare her and pharrell he has a skincare line too it's like you've been rich for so long your skin should be the way it the way it is right whatever you're gonna pump out is not what you've actually been putting on your face 100 for that long but also pharrell is giving vampire vibes yeah you know but he's also he's mixed right but he's melanated you know so

that's what that is but pharrell he doesn't drink either and she doesn't really drink either they don't really do drugs or drink but pharrell from what i know doesn't wear makeup he might throw a little bb or cc or something a little alicia keys cream yeah but j-lo always has a face full of makeup on so and she was super bronzed up and tan at the inauguration without makeup her skin looks like an ipad cape an ipod case she's alabaster she's pale and and i does she have tattooed eyeliner because like her lower her lower lash always has a line on it and i was like no she just in the video that she was doing um the demo she didn't wash all her makeup off she still had like mascara it was bad that's what i'm saying but whatever shout out to you know her

uh publicist esmeralda she's doing her thing esmeralda okay she's coming through hunchback of notre dame yeah she's really doing what she's got to do she's on it and she's making sure that the girls are like j-lo needs to be in the mix listen we need to all aspire to work as hard as j-lo's team because she'd be doing some things that she don't need to be doing and she'd be in places that she don't need to be but she will be there well technically her and lady gaga both did the super bowl so it's it's not so you're saying that they're two for one what that what that mean we need a national anthem singer yes it's a the national anthem it's a big event did we need let's get loud did we need the j-lo song she spoke spanish too well because they were like

latinos for trump they needed they needed some of that they needed to redeem them yeah they did they were like oh she'll she'll make it right it's like first of all she's not cuban she's puerto rican of course she's on board it's that's not why she's on board j-lo will show up to the opening of bernie sanders manila envelope if you invite her she's gonna be there no she's not everywhere she's she's everywhere she's not everywhere she's in the places that matter name places that she named some places and i'll tell you whether jlo was there or not just historical places places and i'll tell you if jlo was there or not well what what has been going on i haven't really been seeing her out jlo was at the civil war jlo marched from selma to

montgomery she didn't march but she was at montgomery when they got there um j-lo has legit been everywhere if you opening a new restaurant she's there if you if there's enough like famous people gonna be there j-lo is going to be there she's at all she's at the teen choice awards she's at the night awards she was at the fresh prince reunion she's always there you're she was in georgia she was in georgia for the vote she don't even live in georgia she's everywhere listen we can't hate on the game we can't hate on the hustle let her do what she does listen all i'm saying is we need to work as hard as j-lo's team does to get her into these places that's what i'm saying we all need to work as hard as esmeralda and quasimodo in them

because her team is working for her they couldn't get jasmine sullivan she can actually sing what she just came out with an album and she just did a little tiny desk concert and the album is nice and freaky we love come on they couldn't get her on there whatever it's fine they said no who wants to sing america the beautiful and jayla was like i'm already i volunteer as tribute you know they had nerve to say on twitter that lady gaga was giving whitney houston's uh national anthem in 1991 Whitney Houston Shown up showed up in a windbreaker Jumpsuit and a headband

The fucking nerve This is in you know who it is It's the white gays y'all have to stop You have to sit down let Y'all have y'all thing and then Let history be history Right we we don't we don't need A comparison just say Lady Gaga

Did her thing yeah she was not Giving Whitney anything no no no I didn't get that I didn't get that Whitney Houston's National Anthem whether she sang it live or pre-recorded whatever went number one yes Lady Gaga's is not gonna go number one it's not I don't need

to hear that again Lady Gaga can sing we're not saying that she cannot sing she is a beautiful singer right but just don't compare the two it's two different things it's not the same it's not top it's not top three it's not it's not it truly is it might be top three that she's ever sang she's

ever sang for what she do but no tea no shade but it's not Whitney Houston's it's it's and just it you guys gotta stop it's just don't just first of all Whitney's gone if Whitney was here she would have been there well I don't know Whitney's voice now is Gaga's voice now is better than Whitney's voice now so let's let's let's be honest all the way through here friend um but um she did great and you could tell she was like very emotional she was looking at the flag she doing light choreography so it was like okay well i mean they were volunteering to do the inauguration yesterday trump couldn't even get somebody like for money when he did it four years ago duh he's terrible he's the awful awful

person and i'm glad that he knew he was like because you know some people they'll be at a party and know that everybody hates them and will stay to make sure that nobody's talking about them Trump was like, I know that you guys are dragging me. I'm out. He didn't even stay for breakfast. He was like, I'm out. He said, well, you're going to walk to the helicopter. You're not going to look back. I'm going to look back. I'm going to wave, maybe give them the finger and then we're going to go. Yeah.

And she's like, okay, Donel. That was the most dignity that man has ever had. He knew when to bow the fuck out and was like. What do you mean bow? It was his last day. He could have stayed. That's like getting fired from a job and then saying, well, I'm going to come to the Christmas

party in a couple of months. they fired you you do not work here your badge has been deactivated yeah but people are saying that trump's gonna find a way to get back in he's gonna say he left his charger there or something um i will say like looking through the pictures and everything it was a little emotional you know just michelle obama kamala it was more diversity than it's ever had it since when well that's because it was less white people there yesterday right that really when you think about it it was because it was like a small ish event yeah it was less white people there than usual so it looked like there were more black people there but it's the same amount it's the same seven black people

that go to every inauguration listen america still is doodoo it has a lot of work to do right but we do have to admit yesterday was well Wednesday was a special moment in time and for people who were able to see it it was a beautiful thing I'm just gonna say all the women showed up and

showed out and Obama looked great Joe looked like Joe so you know you get what you get with people like that we watching you Joseph I'm still waiting on my stimulus

i am have you gotten your money honey let me tell you i called those motherfuckers up i said um yeah it's just waiting on my money when is it gonna hit and they said lol you owe the government money when what whatever you were gonna get is now the government you called the irs and jennifer Lopez picked up the phone she said let's get loud waiting for tonight honestly if she had sang that line instead of let's get loud I think I would have

respected it more that would have been nice because I love that song it's a bop and then they have the green green lights everywhere the lasers tossing and turning emotions are strong they said you're not getting a dime why would you think that and I was like ew I was like well I I am paying it back now and they're like

yeah the money is going towards what you owe you should have said send me my stimulus so i can pay y'all what i owe y'all no because they know me and your track record says that you're gonna pay when you want to pay and usually that's you won't they gotta let us pay as we go you know like what are these penalties and these late fees america doesn't pay their debts why are you rushing me to pay mine it doesn't america isn't it like a trillion it's like four trillion dollars so like who the fuck are you to tell me that part that i need to pay my taxes on time so what if i was 12 years late and okay and what's 12 more years truly also hurry up and forgive these student loans oh the way i'd be ignoring naviance slash

sally may it's and sometimes you just got to get they call you and so this is what they do they call you and they they want you to verify they want you to verify your verify that i ain't got no money no no no verify their information because you know if they keep call if they once they get in contact with you then it's like boom the collection is in motion uh well that's why i can't get in contact with you then they can't like say that this is when it started so whenever they like so we just want to verify i was like no you won't well this is a timely matter we need to speak I know I won't be I send me an email text me and I hang up Sydney I can't I being with you today even when you don't want to speak to somebody on the phone you pick up the

phone and I'm like you could just not pick the phone up especially if it's a number that I don't know it'd be like 718622 I'd be like decline yeah I love hitting that red phone on people if I if your number is not saved in my phone or if your number is saved in my phone I don't have to pick up when you call me if it's an inconvenient time yeah Marie does that to me a lot and it's fine like I get it and it's inconvenient I respect it I'm busy not being on the phone I think I think you you take like offense to it but it's like like yesterday you called me and my phone was on do not disturb for whatever reason but I also like I was like I'm not gonna go to bed until I write for an hour and you called me in the I want to say it was like right when I was

getting ready to like start this class and I was like I saw the missed call because I didn't hear my phone ring and I was like I'm gonna just shoot her a text I'm gonna say hey I'm doing this thing and you said call me when you're done yeah and i called you when i was done so i don't i don't know why i felt like i needed to explain that but yeah i was like okay well go off queen did you just well i'm just saying it's not it's not that i'm ignoring you but no i know that's i respect it we were also just talking about how like you just do what you want to do when you want to do it and that's fine you're a grown-up but like you gotta sometimes set boundaries for yourself you gotta say all right i'm gonna do 15 more minutes of this or

i'm gonna get up at this time to do this thing but you don't you'd be like i'm just gonna indulge and watch video after video on facebook is that where all the beauty bloggers are sis it's a dark moment for me once again you know at the where i see the light i'm midpoint right now i'm like i'm getting closer and closer to the light the light the light like dying no you know there's a light at the end of the tunnel that's where you run when you die the light at the end of the tunnel is covid no i'm kidding it's the i'm closer to the light in the sense of that uh i will get out of this like dark space this dark time wasting space yeah i mean we're in a pandemic so it's like we're all wasting time and don't let anybody tell you

that they're not we're in a parallelogram and uh you know it's we're in a panasonic and we're we're doing what we have to do and there's no rush but also a rush uh because again we're gonna be here for a while but it's like if you can spend your time wisely why not we all I mean I waste a lot of time Sydney I'm just like I'm just like you babe but I just I I tried to force myself to do one productive thing a day yeah and yesterday I tried to hit three because I was or you know Wednesday Wednesday I tried to hit three I that viral tweet I was like I could just stay here for the week but i was like i also i'm gonna make a salad i made a salad and then i was like i should do three things today to complete the trifecta and i was like i'm gonna write for an

hour so it was viral tweet salad right for an hour and then i went to bed at three o'clock in the morning and it was like phew i am beat that's my whole week now and then today i came over here and did some work with you yeah i mean we're doing it it's getting done i'm getting my office together my uh apartment i'm getting a desk and did you order the desk already uh no i but i'll probably do it tonight maybe um i mean people have been asking me what do you want for your birthday and i'm like a desk yeah i want to i want to get my office together so that i'll just sit there and stop sitting on my couch and actually do work and even if i'm just looking at the fucking wall i'm still sitting at a desk and i will say friend this monstera sitting by the couch

sexy this looks so good yeah it's like the perfect shape it's like whoo what's up i see you beach um okay so we watched the inauguration this week what else friend where what else are you watching we talked briefly about what the hell was that show that you like oh uh bling empire yeah i loved it i mean why gaudy asians let's fucking go see now when um unfortunately for the the white people listening when it's just like rich people like beverly hills or something it just is tacky but when there's somebody who's like ethnic behind it It feels cultural, you know? So it's a lot of gaudiness.

Like, just the jewelry, the traveling, the, you know, the families, the parties that they're throwing. And I think they filmed this, like, years ago. It is Crazy Rich Asians for reals. But the reason why I don't like it is it feels like everybody is trying too hard. There's like a dude with like cheek implants that is like trying to be good reality TV.

And for me, that's not good reality TV. No, I think that's really him. It's annoying. I was like following him years ago, like in 2011. Why? How did you find him? Because he was just one of those people who are always like in the mix because he always had Louis Vuitton this and Hermes bags. and he just like you will always people see people reposting his things because he was always buying

oh i had never seen him before but he's young and very rich yeah um and then there's one that is like she like showed up in the same necklace that the host of this party had and it was like girl you can be rich and not be annoying yeah but she's both she name drops she just has to let everybody know like where she's doing where she's going where she got this from and you know that's that's gross especially at a time right now where we're watching stuff and it's just like what is what are things what is this access it's all a waste well i mean what what is her family money where's her money from apparently they all somebody oil money they own buildings they own denim they own malls it's just it's gas money um she's just annoying but when you're rich when

you're that wealthy and you feel the need to name drop and to like remind people of your wealth it's a it's a it's a sign of insecurity yeah if i was a billionaire oil tycoon 24th generation empire child I don't I would hope that I wouldn't be that pressed for people to know who I was like they would just know who you are you would just exactly you just know who I was like the woman like

this older woman Anna I mean she's fucking incredible they just they just went to Paris on a for her birthday you were just we're just gonna go we're gonna fly they surprised a friend and like we're just gonna go to Paris and we're going shopping and da da da da and I

was like oh man I don't even know what I would do if like hopefully we make a lot of money eventually and you know I have some type of coinage to be like yo girl we just flying out but yeah I'm always thinking about like yo what is it to just do and be and say and not care and ah to be white to do and say and not care um no but I felt like that it that first episode that I watched felt like it reminded me of sweet 16 like some of those kids would like fly to paris to get a sweet 16 dress or you know what i mean like at the at the birthday party they would get everyone outside to show them some crazy ass car right or it'd be like just the way that they passed out the invitations at school would be crazy it was like well we had biz marquee or some random everybody's

gotta know mc hammer is at the lockers giving out the invitations to my birthday party and it was like who's that old black man oh you don't know him yeah but now now knowing everything that we know now i just i if i ever get more money and like become more successful i i don't want people to know like that i know what i want them to know i'm doing good like yeah yeah you don't need to venmo me but also like like nowadays everyone is showing all of their stuff in their apartment yes the traveling yes the the expensive items that they have everyone's real ostentatious is that how you say that word ostentatious and i think it's just weird especially since it is a pandemic and it's like do you want to get robbed like you're geotagging where you're at

I'm showing all of my things in my house. You know I'm in the house. But you know what I say? That's kind of what happened with some of these celebrities. Like when Kim Kardashian, quote unquote, got robbed in Paris, people knew she was in Paris with all of her jewelry because she was at Fashion Week. And it's like everybody doesn't need to know everything.

I love a later gram, okay? Everybody doesn't need to know everything. Boom. this is great because we'll slide on right to the to the two lesbian chicks that were living in bali okay honey everybody doesn't need to know everything they tweeted out like listen we've been in bali for over a year now and life is great they're selling ebooks they're telling well set the scene sis when did we because we found out about these girls like like a couple weeks ago or maybe like a few days ago before they went viral two beautiful lesbian women black melanated

skin look hydrated they use hyaluronic acid when they should they look good they were posting pictures of them in these like this like beautiful house we knew they were in bali one of the girls uh put on twitter this whole thread yeah my girlfriend and i are in bali my rent is 400 dollars like we don't need to know why specifics about why i was having a hard time in the states no we came here for six months we swear we've been here for a year yeah we extended well they extended their visa their work visa i don't know i don't know what it is we don't know the specifics here if you want to know uh the facts y'all go on and google it up but yeah don't we we're giving you opinions of what we think we read it's real vague you know we're giving you the cliff notes

but they're kind of wrong yes absolutely so they're posting pictures of them like in the pool they're living in like a beautiful tree house it looks really really nice yeah there's whole thread them in bali um then they're like the thread goes viral on twitter she's like if you want to know how we did it how we game to the system how we managed to extend our visas like buy our ebook for $30 or whatever it was $10 $13 and 22 cent dumb everybody like a lot of people were like happy for them oh they look great they're living well we love that for them how let me see how much a flight to Bali costs they're excited the other half of the internet is angry they're pissed because that is one they're like this is this is how you gentrify you know the whatever

community they're in uh one you have an american dollar so you're able to live a lavish life compared to the actual locals um what else were they were doing but also three and i feel like most importantly the thing that you can't overlook here is black women are not allowed to be happy in the same way that white women are allowed to be happy you know like that's something that like is the underlying thing here i think i disagree i think that because like for some people it's like yes they're out there and they're thriving and and i want to be them but there are people there's like a an edge of like well how dare they how dare they well it was doing better than me no it's how dare you sell an e-book you're making money from from indonesia are you paying taxes in in uh

bali apparently not because what happened two days after they went viral friend sis got deported yeah they said you can't do that they said whoa well because a lot of indonesian people were upset yeah they were like wait you coming into our community you bragging about it being lgbtq friendly which apparently is not it's not that's why that's why i was surprised that they were also tweeting that yeah it was strange they could have just been gay black and happy in bali paying 400 rent and nobody would have known and so then everybody's like making an erase thing and then the the people the locals they're like no no people get deported all the time we kick everyone out that's not supposed to be here the only thing is their tweets are not going viral

everybody no one tweeted and they were like well what they better have that same energy for immigrants in america and it's like immigrants in america are not tweeting that they're living a beautiful life in america and they're gaming the system they're not right they're not saying that somebody somebody um responded because she because now the girl who went viral one of the women is trying to say that they're getting kicked out because they're because they're right no because they're lgbtq no um somebody said no please don't use your being uh gay to garner sympathy from us as a black queer person i find it disgusting yes you were deported for being loud and wrong on social media yes telling your business and saying that people need to move

to bali illegally and during a pandemic yeah so yeah dude like no one would have known what was going on with them but like people want to make a quick buck people want to go viral people want to be on the view it's like sis you could have just sat there and ate your bali food and your girlfriend you could have just had a good life and then came back when you were ready to come back but now you have to leave that and there's shame because we know your first and last name yes we know what y'all look like and we know what happened to you but my problem is is when they're saying about gentrification i said ah we got minorities are not a part of the gentrification uh scheme that's not we don't go into communities and people are like oh now the property value goes up if

anything if you're like oh more black people are moving in oh we gotta oh we gotta go we don't gentrify neighborhoods that's just not what it is and because they were so silly on twitter there was no way they were gonna be able to gentrify bali they shut that shit down quick gentrifiers move in silence honey all of a sudden five years later you're like damn everybody all my neighbors are gone because they've been priced the fuck out yeah but she was saying that she does pay taxes but she was paying her american taxes and people are like well you're in another country using their services you got to pay their taxes too yeah but in her mind she was like well i she was like i'm paying my taxes in the country that i i'm a citizen um and they were like babe what are

you doing with your work visa like you were supposed to be there for a certain amount of time now it's extended now what are you doing right but the people of indonesia are like well we're already overwhelmed here stop telling americans to move that's where i was like you're really dumb that that but we i will be honest about this then they need to shut everybody down everybody is posting that they're in another country somewhere that is going to make people think it's okay to go i don't think that i don't think you posting that you're in another country is going to make people think it's okay to go marie we were not thinking about tulum until we were seeing all these motherfuckers in tulum and that's on period okay and that's fine but i'm

saying it's not me okay yes 100 i saw a bunch of people yeah we saw the people so tulum but we went before oh yes yes yes that's true let's be clear yes but we were seeing an influx in it and that's why people now well that's what game now tulum looks like miami it's gross it's it's a mess down and and i was reading um no i was watching a tiktok uh where this girl from barbados was um she wrote on a bloggers or influencers page we talked about this last week we did on the podcast oh we did we did but finish the thoughts yeah but it was just like people want to escape but it's like where do the people who actually live there are able to escape and it's true and it's true right but and americans are not nice or they're like selfish when it comes to stuff like that

they're like i gotta go i need to get out of where i'm i am because i don't feel good here i'm gonna go to your place and completely ignore all the covid rules and restrictions because it's nice and it's warm and i feel better here right so like if you're gonna show up to another person's country don't be inviting people to sneak in during a pandemic with you because you got in yeah and the extra money that you're making are you giving it to the locals like are you are you taking care of the community are you talking to people so you're not paying taxes for where you live they're gonna be upset with you especially because she's like 400 rent like that is the part of it that i was like okay i mean i could pay 400 rent that sounds beautiful

yeah but it's like everyone who lives there doesn't get paid the same american dollars yeah she was dumb and now it's like she gotta come back here and be in an american pandemic with us um and it was the discussions were pretty great on twitter i i like that they were they're like when um people were like when when two black gay women do it it's okay but when white people do it it's it's gentrification it's like yes it is it is gentrification it is yeah people are saying um people are making it about race they're making it about them being lgbtq or whatever it is but the issue is that she was violating the rules but somebody said they put in the official statement that the lgbt thing was an issue everything else was still wrong but also she was uh like a lesbian

telling other gay people to come to indonesia and they said that was one of the reasons why her ass is getting deported plus she wasn't paying her taxes and it's a pandemic and her visa was expired or whatever so yeah when i when i talked to you know my girlfriend about places to go she's Like, you know, I look at places and there's there's there's it's not OK for us to be gay. You think it's you think everything is like the United States and it's like it's not. Well, there are places in the United States that are not OK to be gay. Yeah. So you can't even bring the Maldives.

You can't even bring like sex toys and stuff like that there. Where's the Maldives, sis? We're on the map is dead. I think that's is that near the Mediterranean? Is that on the other side of Africa? That's got to be by the Indies, right? the maldives i mean look anywhere that you go that's not that you're not familiar with you got to be careful and you need to be able to respect people's culture the republic of maldives

is small state in south asia okay south asia yeah everybody is not as uh progressive as they are in some of these bigger cities i mean there's places in this country that you go to that people look at you funny if you are gay or black or both yeah so how dare you be that bold and that loud and that open and that happy you know but also people don't want to see that no but also i i i've tweeted something out like a couple weeks ago it's like normalize being in a relationship and not having to post about it like a lot of people were writing they're like i was just in a relationship where the person was mad at me that i never posted about them but it's like i don't want everybody in my business like that so a hundred percent it has nothing to do with me not loving you or being

ashamed it's just like I maybe I have people following me that I'm like you don't need to know what I'm doing out of work listen love is beautiful but love is fleeting sometimes and emotions change and sometimes what love is blind you love somebody or you think you love somebody and there's things about them that you'll ignore it's red flags that you will blow past but then when your eyes are open then i gotta look through my instagram and look at all the photos that i posted of us no i don't care how good the dick is you're not getting posted on my page unless i'm nisi nash yes in which case surprise we got married and then it's like oh my god that's who marie was with the whole time and now they can't now she can't stop posting which you know

beautiful for her but it's like now i'm muting you but it's yeah it's just like every everybody has too much access to everyone and i think that's where the boundaries need to be it's like you don't need to tweet out i'm in bali like sis a thread it was like a 13 point thread sometimes it's okay to keep things to yourself or put it in the group chat that's safe it's safe to and even then the group chat's not necessarily safe because you see solange's son dropped a video in his group chat of him with Sky

or what's that black girl the Disney Channel girl the cute one that like dragged Azalea and it's like a sex tape it's low key he's like touching her crotch or his face is in it or something and he was like she cheated on me

fuck her or whatever the hell he said and they said that's revenge porn now and they were both under 18 in the video fuck fuck but it's like why are you dropping this in the group okay listen when i have sex next year or whenever the next time i have sex is uh we can shoot this stuff on my phone and then we gotta burn the cloud down yeah that's what we do yeah that's what we do now that's it we gotta snapchat the sex tape and then when it disappears we can all go home um so this was lovely we learned so

much we hit all the points again uh but yeah don't hide us let everybody know that you're listening to us the the public should know post us all over your page normalize posting about the unofficial expert page because it is it is famously underrated yes and not written up about enough maybe because we don't have segments or whatnot maybe because we maybe we got to go to bali and get kicked out of bali maybe because of your viral tweet now marie we'll be able to blow do you fuck up let's invite bernie sanders on the pod i wish it's gonna be a real dry episode we're gonna do what we can but he'll talk about he'll talk about the mittens that he got on and you know the socks that are uh cruelty free

anyway rate comment subscribe slide to the patreon we we we dropped some stuff in there um yeah this week yeah yeah that hopefully if you're a patron you you're not repeating off-site. Please don't. Oh my God. It's embarrassing. It is embarrassing. I don't even moment of silence for the Patreon. Yeah, I don't even know if I want to put the Patreon up. It's fine. Okay. Love you guys so much. Continue to

be well, be happy, and let's have a decent year. Yes, yes, yes. And normalize, you know, going to bed on time so you can get up on time. Thank you. Whatever on time is for you. Yeah, or to be somewhere on time. Whatever's on time. On time. And we're out.

Bye. Forever. dog this has been a forever dog production the unofficial expert is executive produced by Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio and Alex Ramsey senior producer Tracy Sorin

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