MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - Evil Sister, Good Nurse w/ Karolena Theresa

Episode Date: July 10, 2025

This week Sydnee and Marie are joined by their sister in life and Syndee's emergency contact Karolena Theresa! An episode full of laughs, pregnancy mess, and Cerealgate pt 2.  Don’t forget to write in your messy stories at [e-mail], or call in at [phone] to have your MESSages read live on air! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

you're listening to mess i don't think you're ready for this jelly i'm not what's the jelly this jelly it's i think this i'm gonna put it out there this is probably gonna be one of the best episodes to date i'm putting it out there i'll put that in the universe yeah okay so if you're listening go ahead and pause now get you a little snack get your snack get your juice get your big-ass, doofy-ass Stanley Cup. Curl up on the couch. Bring your dog that got a little limp, and let's go.

Okay, so... Dog with a little limp. Alexa, set timer for 28 minutes, and then you can get up and pee in 28 minutes, and then you can come back to pod. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Yeah. Wow, we're bringing in an infamous guest.

Infamous. Allegedly, we always talk about her. That's what the people are saying, that talk to her. Mm-hmm. Okay. What did you call him? Losers.

No, I'm kidding. Listen, I just want y'all to know that what we talk about here on Mess is for us and you. Yep. And maybe a couple people that you feel like would enjoy the Mess. And by a couple people, you should be telling 10 friends a day about Mess. And the thing is, it's like, don't say specifics as be like, girl, here's the part. You got to listen. Just promote it like that.

Don't give specifics. This is like, don't be one of those tattletale ass fucking clowns. clowns it's like oh do you know the city was like you're like shut up yeah you know on the podcast i heard that y'all had said xyz whoa well we what happens on the pod stays on the pod i didn't know we were on i didn't know we were on the stand right now like overruled overruled let's bring in this guest um yeah let's bring her in so i think you i think you'll have a great introduction I'm gonna be biased cool

so this guest has been on the pod numerous times yes she's probably a top a top three from unofficial expert

yes she's Sydney's emergency contact Phil and yours yes and she's

eight months pregnant eight months pregnant and she came on time make some noise for obviously the one and only Carolina Teresa is here

yay Round of applause Thank you, thank you so much It is my honor, it is my honor, thank you Now if you were giving a thank you speech Who would you thank, what top three people You would thank The first person I would thank would have to be my mother

For giving birth to me The second person I would have to thank Would have to be Sydney Washington For being my friend And for wearing the same shirt that I also have Very interesting I have that same shirt but in off-white. Anyways, and the third person

sounds like a different shirt to me. Like, literally the same thing. You know what? Put a pin in it. I love that you said that because let's talk about the Miami trip that we went to that I had on. I had one more person to thank. If you would just let me. She said put a pin in it and immediately started talking about it. Sina, you have to put a pin in it. That means

hold on to it. Alright, never mind. Never mind. I just want to start off and say I texted you both and I said let's be kind to Carolina today. Let's not gang up on her like you did in Miami. I didn't gang up on you in Miami. Yes, you did. You were on her side.

Okay, well, now let's take the pin out. I can't wait to post the picture. Carolina, I sent that picture to my mother, and she said, it's the same dress. It is not the same dress. It was different material. It had a different cut at the top. It was the same color. Cindy, please tell them what happened.

We're in Miami. It's Marie and Carol. We're in Miami. We're in Miami. We're in Miami. Not city girls. No city girls. No white nail polish on the toes.

Absolutely not. I absolutely always have white toenail polish. I do. Sans ditty. Speak for yourself, babe. Sans ditty. Anyways, so we're in Miami celebrating Marie and Carolina's birthday. Boom.

Which is crazy. It's like two birthdays on one trip? You're wild. So I take them to an extravagant dinner. I think Sydney paid for the dinner that time. I did pay for the dinner. She was very extravagant. She said she's taking us to the Cheesecake Factory after this.

I never said that, Carolina. Stop lying and don't make me fight a pregnant woman. I don't want to do that. Anyway So in Miami I'm so not afraid of Sydney It's the last Just do like this to her

It's the last night I have on this Pink satin dress Mini dress Like it's cute It's hugging me It's giving me I got my toes out

I'm feeling good Yeah you looked amazing I looked amazing You had on A beautiful sequined Cal print dress That was a choice It was a mistake

It was a choice It was a mistake And people make mistakes No I think that There's only so much Cal print you can wear when you are also fat.

I'm not saying that. I'm saying that for me. And the shape of the dress, it was like a shift dress. Yes, it was. I have a Calvert jean shorts and jacket that looks fine. I wear,

it's not the same thing. It was the color. It was the sequin. It was the shift dress. It was a bad choice. I went to dinner in it. No, I did not. No, I did not.

You did look cute. I did not. Yeah, we're going to post the picture too. I did not look cute in it. I went to dinner in that dress. Carolina goes, I think I made a bad choice.

I gotta go back to the hotel and change cool we go back to the hotel Carolina puts on a pink mini dress same exact shade as Sydney's and Sydney's sitting there like what the hell is going on here

what the hell is going on it looked like two Barbies and Carolina thought the whole thing was funny she laughing she cackling she was antagonizing she said sister sister because it was sister sister

but you made it seem like it was a different dress it was the same dress was it from the same place I don't know if it was from the same place but she had the same place. My dress was from ASOS. Where was your dress from?

Mine came from China, just like ASOS. So there it is. But it wasn't the same dress. It was a different material. Yours was stretchy. Mine was not as stretchy. It looked the same.

The same dress. And it was okay. You know what? It was fine. Then we go to a club. She got so angry. She didn't want me to wear this dress. She was like,

you cannot wear this. I said, we look like two different people. We have two different hairstyles. It doesn't look the same. We have two different body types. It just did not look the same. I'm going to tell y'all right now.

And then this betrayer, it looked like, Sydney and Carolina looked like my backup singers. Shoe up, shoe up, shoe up, shoe up. That's what y'all look like. You know what, Marie? That's the perfect description of it. It did. And you look, I mean, obviously you look cute.

Were you going to get that angry, though? I wasn't even angry. You were angry. But Carolina, you had other, why would you be angry? She has so many dresses. She was dressed before you. That was the only dress that made sense. No.

But that's not the only dress that you had. That made sense to go to a club. That made sense to go to a club. I'm not even a club girl. We look like bridesmaids. No, we didn't. No shade. We were going to your wedding, sis.

We were beefing at that wedding. Did I change? I think I changed. No, you didn't. No, you changed. I changed. I feel like I'm alive. You see what you do?

I think God sent me into your life because he was like, Sydney never had a little sister. I'm gonna send her Carolina I think that's what it is It's true So then we go So then we go to this club Club 11

It's supposed to be a club But it's a strip club It's a strip club This is cool So it's ass shaking Titties everywhere And we You concerned about

What color dress we got on Nobody's gonna Pay attention to that When you got A lot of hot Latina women Walking around With their tits out

No You know what You're right Thank you But we didn't have a table So I was upset So now we both Looking like twins

No table just loose at the club I was pissed I was like we gotta go I said we gotta go yeah she did I said I'm out let's wrap it up

I'm gonna call it let's wrap it up I'm calling it I'm calling the car what y'all doing y'all can stay I'm leaving that was so funny

yeah Carolina I was telling my mother that story recently again and I said I'm gonna send you the picture Carolina said it's a different dress

that was one of the funniest but I loved it I was like you know what I have never had a little sister before and it's easy to get Sydney riled up in that way

Is it? Yeah. Carolina, let's talk, because you're about to have a baby. And you know what? Your payback, because you are the annoying younger sister. No, no. Are you ready? You guys are nice.

What kind of friends are you? And you know what I think about all the time? I was thinking about it on the train. I was like, there is a chance that he will be calm. Because I have calm people in my family, and Hamideh is so calm. Who is calm in your family? Name two. Name two people in your family that's calm.

My grandmother was very calm. We don't know her. That's true, you didn't know her. But she was very calm. I think my dad has a calmness to him. Absolute. Girl, you better send us a video. We for the dump.

Because your dad is always, Carolina, shut up. Did you buy the rent? Your dad is always asking, where's the money? He wears the money. And leave me alone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he does it in a calm way, I think.

He's not screaming. He's always screaming. Sometimes he's screaming. Sometimes he's screaming. Girl, you have to watch her stories. I mean, you got to go to the archives to see the classic Carolina stories. I did make a thing of just him. Good.

Also, do you know, you want to hear some mess? My sister, her name is Kendra. She is an evil nurse. No. Evil nurse makes it sound like. She's a good nurse. She's a good nurse. Evil nurse makes it sound like.

Evil sister, good nurse. Evil sister, good nurse. Evil nurse makes it sound like she killing people. Yeah, she's a good nurse. Well, she's a betrayer just like you, Marie. How am I a betrayer? Girl, I tell the truth. She's being put on social media and literally.

Respected. Literally, a couple days ago, she goes and tells him that I put him on my stories. And I was calling him to ask him to pick up my friend from the airport. And he's like, maybe I will pick her up. Maybe I won't. Just the way you lie. You lie about putting me on the internet. I'm like, who told you that, Daddy?

And no one wants to tell me. But you know what? My good brother Parker, my nephew, he told me it was his mother. So you mad at your dad for not, so did he pick your friend up at the airport? No, this is coming in for the baby shower. He's going to do it. He's going to do it. Yeah, but she also won't admit that she did.

She won't admit that she did it. And she goes, all I'm going to say is that I'm not a snitch. You're a snitch. And I said, when was I a snitch? Are you talking about in junior high school when you lied about going to see a boy? And I told on you? So you are a snitch. So you're holding that?

Years later, you're holding that? She really liked him. She goes, it doesn't matter when it happened. She really liked him and you ruined her life. Oh, please. Carolina, let's talk about this. You don't have any boundaries. You don't have boundaries

and you don't respect boundaries. According to who? You don't know what the definition of boundary. No, you don't know what a boundary is. I know what a boundary is. Your dad said,

do not put me on line ever. Oh, okay. And there's multiple occasions that you will post your dad ashy, sleeping, tired, zoomed in on his face. First of all, he's always ashy

so there's not a time when I can take a video of him where he's not ashy. That's why he doesn't want to be online. And you know that. But both of you make fun of him for being ashy. It's Father's Day.

Literally just the other day. Make sure you get him some body oil. I got him a card. I got him a really funny card. Shea butter. I got him a card. Yeah, Shea butter baby for the dad. I got him a card.

But now, Carolina, I feel like ashiness kind of follows you around. We're going to make sure. Not you. It's in my DNA. Oh, I was going to say, if you're saying it's because I'm, that's why I put lotion on, because I knew you were going to try to talk bad about me. No, we would never. We would.

You're pregnant. We would. This is the It's a cloak It's a protective cloak We don't really go at you Now that you with child Your nails are really cute

Let me see No that's not true I gave you a hug I said you look amazing Yeah I miss you Okay well let's talk What's the messiest thing

About being pregnant What's the messiest thing About your life right now Oh my god there's so much I don't want to do Two TMI Top two Well we don't need a TMI

But give us some Some eye Top two I don't even know man What there's so much Damn you act like You went to war What's up

I've been to war she's a veteran obviously at this point I've been through so much what's the messiest things about being pregnant well well your tits hurt a lot

they do but I think no there's a lot of stuff they don't talk to you about and then you find out everybody knows about the tits what do what happens

that they don't talk about tell us well first of all the feeling of a being moving inside of you is both

disgusting and and like beautiful at the same time You want to cry, but then also you're like, I'm an alien. There's an alien inside of me. That's the weirdest feeling in the world. They don't tell you how tired you're going to be.

No, we know. Moms are always talking about how tired they are. Maybe I wasn't listening to moms. Girl. And you know what? That's the problem. Listen to moms. I think, yeah, you're right.

I mean, did they tell you how tired? No, you're so exhausted sometimes. They be tired. No, this is before the baby comes. Like, you just can't. Like, we went out the other day where I saw you. The next day, I was out of commission. And let's talk about this mess here.

This is a mess that I've witnessed. Carolina, knowing she's a tired pregnant lady, wants to be outside. Running in a street. She's insisting. Yes, I do. I want to go to the—you messaged me the other day. I want to go to the club. I want to go to this party.

No, you sent me a flyer, said no words. I said, what is this? What's this, babe? I want to go to this party. I did want to go to that party. Carolina, you were not going to make it to that party. And wasn't it a LGBTQ? If the LGBTQ plus, are you the plus?

Are you a gay keeper? Are you the LGBTQ gay keeper? Yes. The baby's the plus. Yeah, the baby's the plus. The baby has actually been to many LGBTQ parties. The baby has. If he comes out gay, we know why.

Okay, exactly. That would be fine with me. Carolina would actually prefer a gay baby. I will tell you, you know, on New Year's Eve, I was pregnant. I did not know that I was pregnant. I'm going to tell the story, but just please understand, I did not know that I was pregnant

oh here we go I went to the gay rave on New Year's Eve and I did what one does at the gay rave and the next day I went and got

all you can eat sushi that's why he's doing somersaults in there and that's why you back and forth in the hospital he probably but this was in

the very beginning no no no no this was in the very beginning he wasn't he was like this he was literally like this he's doing Lady Gaga in there right now

he is can we talk about this all you can eat sushi yeah sick Why? Where was this? It's in Queens.

It's so amazing. I will take you there one day. It's the best. You lost me at Queens. No, you guys, okay? And that's so sad because Queens literally is the best representation of New York City. Girl, I'm going to pray for you. And I'm from Queens and I represent Queens all day, every day.

What do they say about Queens? You think you're the best representation for New York City? No, Queens, the borough is. I'm asking if you think you are. Honestly, yeah, I could be. She does rep hard for Queens. First of all, I rep hard for Queens. And I feel like, yeah, I could be.

Excuse me? I didn't say nothing. You want to fight? Carolina, I, too, will fight a pregnant lady. Okay, Carolina, another, what is something that's not messy that you're looking forward to after having the baby? A nice, cold, crisp glass of Sauvignon Blanc. Bitch, let you know.

You want me to bring you a bottle at the hospital? Oh, cold. I want it cold. You can. And I want it in a glass. Don't give me a plastic cup. I want it in a glass. Don't give a wine in a plastic cup.

Well, she said she's bringing it to the hospital. She's got to bring a glass, too. They're not going to let wine in the hospital. They're not checking bags at the hospital. Stop me. If the baby's out, I want a nice, cold, crisp glass of Sauvignon Blanc. Preferably from South Africa or Argentina. Carolina, well, you know, you're going to be breastfeeding,

so I don't think you could do that. My baby's going to be me, too. First of all, pump and dump. that's literally you pump and dump or it's just like I don't know like I feel like are y'all listening to white women

in the Hamptons of course they're pumping and dumping can you do a yes or no yes you can you can you can you can literally just squeeze it out I squeezed my nipples the other day

and a little bit of liquid came out okay TMI she called me and told me this and I didn't share that you did that was wild yeah if anybody could just you know mute that out

how much liquid let's talk just a little teeny like literally one little drop and one little drop so you did it on both yeah I squeezed this one and the liquid came out

And I was like, oh, my God. And then I was like, my mom was there. Did you call your husband and be like, hey, baby? No, no, no. You want to do a taste test? You want to see me get hair? I saw this thing on Instagram where this woman has been breastfeeding her husband for, like, years now. And she has complete control over him.

So I would breastfeed Hamid. I would. That's mess. I'm crazy. Now the people, the woman. He'll do whatever she says. Can you imagine? Your husband just does whatever you say because you breastfeed him.

I don't want to breastfeed him for him to do what I say. He should already kind of, you know, do what I suggest. Yeah, he's already been inside you. He should definitely do what you say. Yeah, that's not real. That's not real. That's not how marriage works. Okay, well.

That's true. I'm sorry. I'm just being realistic. That's not how marriage works. He says sexual things to me. It doesn't mean I listen to everything he says. Well, we know that. We know that full fact.

He also asked not to be online, and you post him as well. Exactly. Ashy and tired. so it just not like you just this idea that like oh you should you're supposed to like

listen to your husband and the wife and the husband listens to the wife and we just always just do what each other says what but you brought this up

I'll kill him you said girl he gonna kill you before you kill him no he would never he would not he wouldn't even touch a fly slapped

yeah but you said that the lady controls the man with her breast milk yes I think so it's very witchy I love what I should do what I should do

What you should do is take some of the breast milk and pour it into some creamer. And sneak it. Ew, I think you need to tell him. I'm so glad I'm not at 639. I'm so glad I got out. Because if you had put something in my stuff. I wouldn't do that to you. Yes, you would.

You would. You would. You would absolutely sneak a little breast milk in Sidney's creamer. And you know I'm gay. And then all of a sudden I'm like, is Carolina hot? Like, you would do some nasty shit like that, Carolina. I wouldn't, I wouldn't. I mean, the way you just said it made me kind of be like, hmm.

Carolina, remember when you drugged your father? I didn't drug him. You did drug him. I didn't drug him. Tell the story. I didn't drug him. Very quickly, he went into... So, the way that it works is that

they know that my parents own the building that we lived in. Okay, Nepo. I still live there. That doesn't make you a Nepo, baby. It doesn't make you rich. Hilary Banks. Okay, anyways, the fact of the matter is

he went in there when I was not there. He went and took, obviously, his keys. He went in there. He was supposed to be doing something. Either way, he found some sorrel, and he drank... It was like a bottle that was this big. and he drank this much of it

and it had THC in it so it was weed sorrow and he drank so much of it that he didn't know there was weed in it I wasn't there to tell him he went to the hospital because he thought

he was having like a stroke or a heart attack but what a cool stroke that was no it's not cool and you don't know no no no but wait wait

because a stroke feels very like aggressive but to be so high that you think you dying that's like a oh wow but he also had never he's never been high before

yeah that doesn't sound fun it was scary my son stroked him what did the doctor say to him when he was like no I told him I left

I was at the pool in New Jersey I left I come in there I'm crying I'm like oh my god my daddy where's my daddy

and I go in there and I'm like daddy and he's sitting there and he's like so like like a little fat little chunky chunk he's like this and I'm like daddy

what did you eat what did you drink did you do this did you do that he's like I just had some sorrow I said I said how much sorrow

mind you we're in the what's it called? The emergency room. So it's like, you know, just a sheet and there's a guy next to us. And he's like, oh, I had just a couple of glasses.

I was like, a couple of glasses is crazy. I said, daddy, that's... Because my mom stopped making it because it has too much sugar in it and he needs to relax with sugar. Yes. So he was just like

a little Goldilocks, greedy little thing. He was like... Mind you, this is a sorrel that I used to drink all pandemic long. So you know it's strong.

It's the best. All pandemic long. and you only needed a little bit. You just needed a little cup. And you'd be high at swim class. This man drank like three-fourths of the whole thing. That's wild. There was this much left.

Also, he lied about a couple of glasses. I was like, you must have took it to the head. Girl, he had to take it to the head. Yeah, yeah. He had a straw in it. No, I'm just saying he did. I need to find that lady's contact again because I need some of that.

Me too. I'm not to the hospital, bitch. Okay, so bring that for the baby. You know what I see on TikTok is a lot of people, men are bringing sushi boats. I'm not bringing a sushi boat. I don't want a sushi boat. I don't want to enjoy sushi in the hospital. Maybe I'll change my mind.

You can't enjoy sushi in the hospital. I don't know, but everyone's doing it. I'm telling you, that's the trend. I don't want hospital dust and crumbs in my sushi. You're bringing sushi to the room where I just like, God knows what it, to get this baby out? Yeah. You can poop yourself. You can shit yourself.

I saw a guy. By the way, I hope you know that. He brought in fresh oysters and they were like shucking. In the oysters, no. At the hospital? That feels like cross-contamination. No, no, no. I think I just want a big old pizza.

Hold on. Shooking oysters. Shucking. Shucking. Whatever. What'd I say? Shook? Shooking.

Shushacking oysters in the hospital is crazy to me. It was so nice. I was looking, I was like, and this is what y'all think, is like, ooh, my man, my man, my man, he thought about me. No, but I mean, it is a nice gesture. It's just kind of unhygienic. It's the wrong place, wrong time. Yeah.

Yeah. Y'all gotta go home. Yeah. You can't wait a couple days? I want a big pizza. I want a bunch of different kinds of baked goods because I have gestational diabetes, which is like my placenta is giving me diabetes. I have to not have sugar and I have to take insulin and stuff.

So I want to just be fat and eat a bunch of sugary things. But not so much candy, like actual baked goods. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. So I'm confused. So you have gestational diabetes, right? Yes. So after the baby's born, so now you want to-

It'll go away. It'll go away. Oh. It's from gestational. it means pregnant. Okay. Oh, you should have said that. Yeah.

You said pregnant diabetes. I didn't know it was a thing. Yeah. So, pregnant diabetes. Well, I mean, you would know if I had diabetes

before I was pregnant. Weren't you shooting up before? No, that was the Ozempi. Oh, my God. I was shooting up the Ozempi. I don't know what y'all do. You think it's happening

with the baby in you? No, before I had, I honestly think the Ozempi got me pregnant because I have PCOS and it's really, it's supposed to be very hard for people with PCOS

to get pregnant any semi-glutide any Wegovi what's the other one any of those anything where you just I was gonna say Manjaro Manjaro

yeah any semi-glutide I have another girlfriend who's pregnant too and she has PCOS and she was also on the on a semi-glutide okay girls

let's go get them don't go to Dr. Wu you know get that Ozan be careful the thing is if you have be careful

be careful no you can't I mean no no wait I thought everybody wanted to get pregnant. I mean, if you don't want to get pregnant, like, I...

If you don't want to get pregnant, you have to abstain. I wasn't planning to get pregnant. I wasn't trying to get pregnant. I thought Ozempic was getting... I was very sure. I thought Ozempic was getting people pregnant because, you know,

when they got they slim bodies, you know, people couldn't keep their hands off them. Marie. Boom, shakalaka, and now there's more babies. Oh, so are you saying that in order for someone

to not be able to keep their hands off of you, that you have to have a thin body? Why did you let her walk you into this? She didn't walk me into nothing. Okay. Yeah. No, it's okay. It's okay.

The people will just see the fat phobia that I've been dealing with for years now. Fat phobia is crazy. From both of these skinny witches. You have to speak up for us. Cut and gone. You have to speak up for us because they have called us fat phobic before. They have? Yes.

Because you are. We are not. We rebuke that. Okay. Okay. Yeah, sure. Carolina, can you please explain? You're like, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat.

But then if we say, okay, fat bitch, then there's a difference. I don't even have to say anything because you just called me a fat bitch. No, no, no, no. You call yourself fat. You just called me a fat bitch. No, no. I meant to say, I meant to say. You have to define this.

They've been saying we're fat phobic. They say we're fat phobic, you fat bitch. No, no. You know what? I'm going to take that L. I'm going to take that L. I'm quiet for the rest of this. I'm not here, y'all.

I'm gone the baby's laughing too I'm gone I'm gone baby no more the baby's laughing too end scene she's out

who the glasses no girl but I'm saying like this is stuff that you would say like I'm beautiful black fat bitch and then

I've never said that in my life so what you say I don't know what you're talking about what you say I don't know what you're talking about

girl we were living in the house for years you would say that I've never said that before I don't what would she be saying I didn't live with her

yeah seems like seems like you're the only one who it's weird it's crazy isn't it fat bitch I never said that

fat bitch I said big mama yeah big mama clip that up and put that and then write fat phobia

no no we we've reviewed that actually you know what this episode doesn't need to be released we can keep this in the vault

exactly this is just correct cause you're ashamed we're gonna put this on the patreon actually yeah because you're ashamed of your fat phobia okay cool no never how can i be fat phobic my best friend is i'm not even gonna say the word Carolina, how many names is your baby going to have? Ooh, yes.

Because I know you have... Let's talk about middle names. Your full name is like Carolina and da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Well, you know what? He's got to have... He's Muslim, so his names are pretty Muslim and African. Except I will tell you, and I can't say what his names are, except for obviously his last name will be Wadrago.

What's wrong with that? Why are you saying it like that? I'm supposed to change my last name to Wadrago. And I'm just... I like that. I was going to say, Carolina, Teresa, Rodrigo. It sounds kind of Game of Thrones-y. Anyway, his middle name will be Dulles after my dad.

Oh. Okay, what is that? Why do you think my baby's going to be Ashley if I name him Dulles? No, I just, I don't, I know you told me the name and then Dulles. Yeah. I don't know if baby getting any ass. That's like a crazy name. You already thinking about the baby getting ass, Sidney?

Literally. I just thought to myself, like, no, you have to think about the future. Because you're like, oh, I'll get this cute name for the baby. I'm so worried about his future. Babe, the last part of his future I'm worried about is him getting ass. He doesn't need, like, what? What, don't you want him to have love in his life? Yeah, of course.

But I don't think that's something that I need to worry about. I think that'll happen naturally. Like, I wonder what kind of person names their child Herbert. Okay, but his first name is not Herbert. His first name is going to be, I'll say it, it's going to be Zayn Numba, and then his middle name is going to be Dulles and Wadrago, and that's the name. I don't know if he's getting a job, baby. That's crazy.

That's a lie. I like Zayn. You think that that's bad? There were other options. You know I didn't choose that, right? I think you do. So who got to choose? Hamide put, no, Hamide's mother and brother, because the father passed away, in Burkina Faso,

put together a list of names that they got from the imam in Burkina Faso. And then from that list, Hamide chose a couple, and then he talked to me about them. And Zayn was, to me, the best one. But yeah. What about Zayn? My sister wanted to name him Landon. Zayn James. What's the other one?

Who the hell is Zayn? Because you need some, like. Zayn James. And it's Numba. Don't forget Numba. Well, the Numba is silent. It is. It is.

It's silent. The Numba is silent. It's implied. It's implied. No, that's because when he goes to school or gets like a job. It's going to call him Zayn. Well, maybe. When you go to school, nobody's calling you Sidney Elizabeth Washington.

Well. It was Britain. That was my middle name. Okay, but she calls you Elizabeth, so I call you Elizabeth. She calls everybody Elizabeth. Elizabeth is for the streets. You should throw Elizabeth in your son's middle name. No, thank you.

It used to be Sidney Elizabeth, and then she started throwing it to everybody. I said, oh, I don't want that. Elizabeth is something else. Elizabeth is everybody's middle name. It's for the streets. What's your middle name? Britain? Britain.

Interesting. My mom wanted to make sure I get a job. Sydney, Britain, Washington. Well, been around a while. No, that's a great name, but there's nothing I can do about it. It's the culture. You know what I mean? And I feel like when it comes to the culture stuff, sometimes I'm just like, whatever.

Why whatever? Because it's just like, I don't know. It means so much more to them than it does to me. To go through that whole process and then go to the imam. You know what I mean? do all that. For me, I would just pick a name. But what about your culture? Don't you have a culture? Yeah, I put Dulles in there.

Oh, right. And we're back. That might just be the title of the episode, Dulles. Who literally hates his name being said, and now we're saying it so much. Hey, Dad. Don't you miss me? He does. He loves you guys. Does he?

He does. When he sees me, he's like, that's what he looks like all the time. I get a little smile from Dulles when I'm with him. That's his favorite. He'd be like, look at you. Look, look, look, look, look at this. Anything Marie says, Marie goes, hi. He's like, ah.

Yes, this is true. Yeah. He's like, Marie. Your dad. He's so funny. I'm about to name my baby Dulles. Oh, sweet, sweet Dulles. No one's going to call him Dulles.

Nobody calls you by your middle name. I have like three middle names. Nobody calls me that. Yeah. That's your middle name. I'm not telling you. Why? Well, you know one of them.

Oh, Nerissa. Luisa. Luisa. Luisa Teresa. Nerissa Luisa. Yo, y'all was playing. When they was putting the names together, they were just doing, they were shifting shit around. They were like, yeah, that works.

You remember the paper thing that you had to go like this and count? And then the last one is Songhai. The origami. Songhaim? Songhai. S-O-N-G-H-A-Y. That's also your middle name? Girl, you got a little Asian in you?

I actually don't even remember what Songhai is from. My sister's middle name is Eshmukhane. What? All right. I think we've done so much with names. It's a Mayan name. A shukame? A shmukane.

A shmukane. How do you spell that? You don't even know. It sounds like a dessert a little bit. No, it's a Mayan word. Can we get a shmukane for the table? Yeah. I want some of the shmukane.

You're making me hungry. Cheesecake Factory. We don't. You're not. You got gestational diabetes. And I want to go to the Cheesecake Factory. That baby can't have Cheesecake Factory today. Let's talk about how this is a mess.

Carolina is allergic to shellfish. And has been the entire time. And you continuously eat shellfish. No, no, no, let's run that back. Carolina has not been allergic to shellfish the entire time. She developed a shellfish allergy and she beat the shellfish allergy. No, no, no. The shellfish allergy be beating your ass.

I have beat the shellfish allergy. Sometimes I make mistakes and I miscalculate how I can maneuver. What do you mean? I mean, Carolina has a shellfish allergy, and she went to an all-you-can-eat shrimp dinner with me and my situationship at the time. With one of Marie's lovers. And I will say, shout-out to Marie for having generous lovers. Because I've been on a couple of little dates with her lovers. We shout-out to them.

Yeah. They're still dead to me, though. Yeah. Absolutely dead now. So this date went well, but let's talk about the time where then you had to go to the hospital. Oh, when I was pregnant. Yes. I went to the hospital when I was pregnant.

It was really scary. What kind of shrimp did you have? Because I had shrimp from the Chinese takeout, and I went into anaphylactic shock, and my tongue swelled. I was literally like this. It was so swollen, it was out of my mouth. My eyelids, my nipples, my vagina all swole up.

Itchy, hives everywhere. Every single part of my body was covered in hives. How many shrimp do you think you ate? I mean, I had a shrimp and broccoli. What do you mean? You ate the whole thing? Yeah, I was hungry. Oh, well, you know they skimp on the shrimp, though.

No, there was shrimp in there. There was shrimp in there. New Food King, you know it. Oh, I love New Food King. Shout out to y'all, New Food King. Shout out to New Food King. I missed y'all. This episode is not sponsored by New Food King.

You almost killed my friend. Well, she almost killed herself. Yeah, I'm like, what? And I was crying because I was so scared. That's never happened to me before. That was the worst reaction I've ever, ever had in my life. And I was screaming, crying. I run into the ER.

I'm like, I can't even talk and I'm crying. All these West Indian, because I went in our neighborhood. All the nurses are West Indian. They come in the room and they're like, why is she crying? Why is she crying? Oh, gosh, she's still crying. Pregnant Will Smith and Hitch. Except I was crying.

Sobbing, screaming, crying. And they'd be like, stop crying. You're making your blood pressure high. Literally, they were so annoyed with me. They'd come back and be like, you're still crying. Oh, gosh. Carolina, you're perfect. Now, I love this Carolina, but house Carolina, man, we done gotten so many arguments.

Oh, yeah. It's ridiculous. Yeah, but you also called me the other day and you were like, you know what, Carolina? Actually, you are the best to me and I love you so much. Well, because you're pregnant. I got to, you know, nurse you. No, she said she got to get you up. No, because without me, you realize that I was a treasure and a gift to you.

And I was so sweet to you. I treated you like a queen. I remember you barging in, you know. Shooting her like a queen. No, no, no. I remember you barging in to rooms and apartment doors with no regard for what was going on. No pants, no bra, no shoes, no service. Yeah.

Just coming in to Sydney's bedroom. To make sure she was okay. She was. What if I was trying to flick my beam? What if I was trying to, what if I was double fisting dildos? What do you think I was doing? The lock of the door didn't work. I would lock the door.

I would lock the door. Carolina, I've never seen your door locked. I would lock the door to my bedroom when I wanted to masturbate. I was afraid she would catch me. I would lock the door. No, I was never checking for your room like that. No, it wasn't a while, but just in case, you never know. Because I knew if you caught me, you would never let me live it down.

I'm good, sis. I'm good. I actually, I stayed on my side. So did she ever walk on you masturbating or about to finish? I mean, you really shamwowed the situation. I was like, I think I'm good off this. I don't really. I don't need to come today.

I need to abstain. You just waited till I was gone. Like you knew I was not there. I don't believe you never masturbated. Please don't lie. I mean. You waited till I was gone. It was dark times for me.

I won't lie. Yeah, you were masturbating. Everyone masturbates. Oh, you're saying you weren't. I said it was dark times for me. Yeah. So you. I don't understand that.

Because when I have dark times, I still masturbate. Oh, OK. Through the dark and the light. Yeah. Nothing makes you feel better than an orgasm. That's why I'm like, what? Yeah. But then I wake up and then I'm still there.

So I was like, I was like, you know, but it's I did. I did masturbate. It was good. Thank you. You you. It was good. Thank you. Yeah.

I was just afraid of, you know, your husband coming in. He would never go in your room. He's so respectful. We were we were at the OBGYN today and she had to prop my legs up in the stirrups. And I was like, I like you ain't never seen it before. process like that? Inshallah. Inshallah. My poor Muslim husband, he was like,

oh my God. I was sitting there laughing with my legs wide open. I said, look at him. He's so freaked out. You know, the last time I was at the gynecologist, I had this like older white dude doctor and he was like, Faustin, you know, I know a

Faustin, a doctor, a great guy out on the island. Any relation? He's in my legs. I said, yeah, I think that's my uncle oh great guy he's saying this inside my body oh my god tell him i said hello not you i think that's my uncle yeah i think that's my uncle yeah great great guy i was like yeah now you loved it carolina and marie have a really great uh relationship they they hardly argue they never get into we don't really argue because i'll be right no no is that let me tell

something nobody really people don't really argue with Marie she's a sorceress you have to realize she's a sorceress we'll get mad at each other but also you two you don't get as mad at her as you do at me are we talking no you talk but it's different

we're adults we do talk it out we are adults when I know that Marie's not gonna cry Carolina you do have watery eyes you pull out the tears so quick she about to cry right now That's you talking.

You just know what I'm talking about. Whatever, you cry too. You cry too. I just want to do that with you. I was a friend. I'm like, whoa. Hold up. Sydney and Carolina are twins in that.

Marie, you do cry. You cry. Sydney, you do cry. You cry on a dime. But she turns it off quick. Sydney will be sobbing full Halle Berry Oscar tears. And then literally. I'm not good at that.

In a second, she's done. You draw it out. You dramatic with it. I don't mean to draw it out. I just, I'm not good at controlling my emotions that quickly. That is, I'll never forget one time I was in, where was I? I was in Scotland with Black Jasmine. And I turned to Black Jasmine.

You could have just called her Jasmine on the phone. No, but she has two Jasmines, so. Just so you guys know who I'm talking about. Yeah, they don't know us. Black Jasmine is wild to say to just the masses. I didn't put, I'm black. Why are you going to call the other one White Jasmine? Yeah.

Because she's not white, she's Latina. Why don't you call her Latina Jasmine? She just calls her Jasmine. She's Jasmine. why black Jasmine can't just be Jasmine well Jasmine other Jasmine is my cousin

and I've known other Jasmine longer so call her cousin Jasmine and then call the other one Jasmine okay I guess I could call her it's too late now she's solution oriented

I agree with you but it's too late now it's been years of black Jasmine you can't okay alright I'm sorry Jasmine if you listening I'll try

and then you and then you got me be like well how's black Jasmine I said wait wait a minute yeah you call her that too everybody calls her that

you call her that anyway when she calls me on my phone the phone says black jasmine princess emoji. This is crazy. Dark medium brown skin.

Yeah. So you were in Scotland with jasmine. Yes. And I just remember like I don't know what happened to me. Honestly, it was sad. I just I think I was like

just very emotional because I had had a miscarriage. Thank you. And then I was in Scotland randomly at some crazy ass party and I was like and I turned to her

and I was like and she just looks at me and she goes walk away. do not cry for all these white people I was like you're right

you're right but that's something to cry about also Scotland I mean the parties wasn't that poppin so that was a time to cry no that party

specifically was crazy everyone was so fucked up but that I thought that was your speed it is my speed but in that situation

randomly I just had like it come on to me and I just looked at her and she was like don't you dare and I was like that's not the tears I'm talking about

but yeah I'm talking about the weaponized tears that you use. They're not weaponized. I'm just sensitive. They're not weaponized. I'm sensitive and so are you. See, I don't say that to you. You know what my sister said to me?

She said, I cry to manipulate people. And I stand by Kendra. Oh, absolutely. I don't stand by that. I don't stand by that. Because I don't. She just said weaponized. And now we're saying, yeah, Kendra.

That's what Kendra said. Kendra's known you longer than anybody else. Literally your entire life. So if anybody knows what your tears mean. She also said, I don't think I've ever cried as much as you've cried in my life that you cried one day. And I said, that's sad, Kendra. I said, that's sad. I'm with you, Kendra.

No, no. Our dry eye friends. Dry eyes. I remember one time I was on the phone with Marie and you, and Marie was like, and I was getting emotional. And Marie goes, no, no, Carolina, stop it right now. Don't you cry. You better suck that tear back in. It's okay.

Carolina, I just want you to know, I love that you're an emotional, you know, nepo baby queen, Latina, Afro-Latina, like, amazing actress, comedian. Like, I love all of that about you, but then you just keep doing a lot with me. Because, like, when the situation with your cat, I mean. You started it. How did I start it? You panicked me. You panicked me, and you put me in a place where I panic. Let's set the scene.

Carolina went away on vacation. For a whole month. I went to Africa. For pride. You went to Africa for pride, and then I was stuck in the house. To meet my husband's family. Make it sound nice. Carolina went to Africa for pride.

For a month. To meet her husband's family. Left Sydney home with two cats that are, let's be honest, not that well behaved. Good as well behaved. Sure, but you can't lie, the other one is kind of bad. He's bad. he's a little bad and that's the one

that went missing he killed a bird and he hid it in her room which was crazy Carolina you know what was crazy she found a dead bird in her room

you know what was crazy me on FaceTime with you you're like he wouldn't leave I know him you don't know that cat you met

you got him off the street when he was a baby when he was a baby I've known him his whole life he wouldn't leave he found him outside he wouldn't go outside

you found him outside David found him outside he belongs to the thank God Girl, you didn't find him. No, no, no. Wait. First of all, the cat belongs on the streets.

It was some other cat that looks just like him because he's an outside cat. Because he's a one of a kind. No, he's not. He looks like any other tuxedo cat. So, Sydney, how long was the cat missing for? A whole damn week. And when did you tell Carolina in that week that the cat was missing? I text Hamadeh.

I text him on day 2.5. So, you told Hamadeh before you told me? Absolutely. Yeah. Because he knew what to do. I said, hey, man, I don't know where George is. I've been looking for him. He's like, oh, he's probably mad we're not there.

Yeah, yeah. That's what I thought at first, too. I said, okay, so should I tell Carolina? No. Don't tell her. You heard that? No. He said no.

Well, I think he didn't want me to get upset. He said no. Not now. No. He'll come. He'll come. And then click. His accent is great.

He hung up on you? That's pretty good. Yeah. And I said, okay. And then I did a Barbie story on Instagram and telling everybody what's going on. Because then I found the dead bird. And, well, no. Yes.

Then I found the dead. And people were like, that cat is gone, sis. If the bird is dead, where is he? And I was like, okay. Yes, but you know that he was giving you a gift. He's an asshole. That's a bad gift. No, that's when cats kill something and give it to you as a gift.

They're literally saying, I'm hunting for you. Here is food. I hear what you're saying, but it's still a bad gift. A good cat would have left a bottle of rosé or something under the bed. She's sober. A Sephora gift card would have been great. But anyways, he jumped out of the window. And Carolina was crying, screaming.

I was like, I don't have a place to live. I'm on the streets. I'm on the streets like the cat was when she brought him in. She actually was so devastated, and it was kind of embarrassing because I was around his nieces, and they're teenagers, essentially, and one of them was like, you should not cry in front of us. Basically, she was like, you should not cry in front of us. They're just, the African culture, the culture of Burkina.

They said, you should not cry in front of us. You should not cry. If you need to cry, you should go. Hey, there's people who have it worse. They're like, if you need to cry, you should go in your bedroom and cry. So it's a privilege to cry in Burkina Faso. They just weren't used to seeing an adult crying like that, I think. Because, I mean, when you think about it, I am the adult.

Kind of. In the room when there's just me and a 19-year-old and an 18-year-old. I'm the adult. This is crazy. So they were just like, whoa. People just don't cry. I think people don't cry like that. Carolina blamed me for this cat.

I didn't blame you. You blamed yourself. No, you blamed me. I did not. Carolina's like, you know what he means to me? I didn't say that. He wouldn't just leave like that. I did say that.

I said, that cat had a—first of all, there was a big-ass hole in the screen that y'all never got fixed. Well, you know why. Because y'all let him be on lead. No, because Dulles didn't want to fix it. So really, it's Dulles' fault. This is Dulles' fault. Then I put up the missing cat photo, and then that's when it all went downhill. Your dad called me, and he said, take it down.

He said, take it down? He said, take it down right now. Why? He said, take it down. Why? Because he's paranoid and he didn't want people to be like, he was like, you're giving out your phone number. Random people are going to be

calling you. They're going to find you. They're going to kill you. Literally. Because people were like, oh, I got the cat. I got the cat. They're not sending no photos, but they're like, oh, I got the cat. I'll come meet you. That's so sick, though. That's a sick thing. They said, I'll come meet you? Yeah, I'll come meet you. To say that you have the cat and you're not saying, you're just lying because you want to come

kill her? I mean, that's sick. Crazy. Yeah, and I said, handsome some reward what was sis what was you willing to offer for the

reward well this was in 2024 in the summertime I was making some money I mean I was willing

for 500 really for the cat that ran out yeah but then I wouldn't be paying you rent yeah that's

real okay I can get that I get that but also I hear you but my honestly George

means that much to me that I would accept that George means the world to me that's my baby boy You are upset, but you also upset my friend about that cat situation.

I was crying to Marie. I was crying to everybody. I was like, I can't. First of all, I never said anything that was like, you're a bad person. She felt she. No, you did imply that it was her fault by saying he would never leave. He would never do that. I don't see the connection.

Oh, you don't. It's not the cat's fault that it's gone. It's Sidney's fault that he's gone. No, that's not what I was saying. I was just saying I know my cat and I don't think that he would leave me. So what did you think? She threw it out the window. No, I think something happened.

I don't know what happened y'all left for a month that's what that's what happened during pride during pride what you keep saying over and over again

like that was my choice and oh wait wait hold on like I did it on purpose this is the best part this is the best part okay so the next day I called Carolina

she's like can you just turn the phone around I'm gonna yell I'm gonna yell his name I'm gonna yell his name just I'm gonna yell his name

you're can you just put me by the closet yep George George George oh okay

okay can you go outside can you go outside right now he's gonna hear my voice he's gonna hear my go outside right now Sydney and then I walk my ass downstairs

and be like George George that's not the way I say it on speaker yes yes you did Carolina you are

you cat people are sick sick sick I tell you I am sick so I'm outside in the in the garage George George, I would be coming home every night after.

I would go to every show, and I'm like, yo. I would tell them what happened. I'm like, what do I do? People are like, yo, you got to get another cat that look just like you. No, no, no, no. George, his personality is so specific, and his look and his personality, I could never be fooled. What do you mean his personality is so specific? He's just a boy cat.

No, he's not. He has a very specific personality. You know he has a specific personality. personality does okay thank you yes he's all over you and she just said cat people like she's not a cat person i know because i met sydney kind of as a cat person i feel like a cat person i gave them a whole cats up now yeah but you love my cats you talk shit about them but you love my cat she likes them as friends she don't love them sis i think love is a strong word here okay Now let's get into the most important part.

You had this baby. I want to be called a friend. I don't want to be called auntie. Marie, are you auntie? Tante Marie. Is that French? Tante? Tante.

Tante. Tante, yeah. I'm cool with Tante. I'm French. T.T. Sidney. No, no. T.T. and Tante. This is your friend.

T.T. and Tante. It's so cute. No. You want the baby to call you friend Sid? Yes. No. That's weird. I'm not.

I want y'all to understand, I am somebody's aunt. I have nieces and nephews. Okay. I'm not their aunt. So how dare I? You'll be an aunt to someone else. Yeah, I don't do that. I hear what you're saying, but it's me.

Saying friend Sidney. They're like, some woman named Sidney is on the phone to talk to somebody. oh they don't even know you you should be T.T. Sid then and I also think it's my child who you and I are so close that doesn't make any sense to me

the thing is that I'm close to you I don't know that boy you're gonna know him you're gonna know him in the beginning Miss Sidney she would love that I have to call you Miss Sidney Miss Sidney

Miss Sidney my mom said You lost the cat. Miss Sydney, my mom dropped me off outside. She said, you're going to watch me. LOL. I think this is a problem. It's an epidemic that people have their babies, and then here's Titi, here's Auntie,

and you got like 20 friends. You're going to confuse the child. Who is my real aunt? Well, it's Kendra. It's technically just Kendra. Oh, this is Titi Melissa, and this is Titi Artie, and Titi Amina and

you're acting like people don't do that like I've made this up no no no I'm saying that's a problem you just don't like the concept of it

it's not a problem I'll see a friend I haven't seen in years oh here's Kevin say hi to Titi he don't know me he haven't seen me ever okay fine

but in this instance you're gonna know my kid right are we going to the hospital Marie yeah with Sauvignon Blanc and um pizza what kind of pizza

yo I think we should what kind of pizza pepperoni We're vlogging. Can we vlog? You can vlog. You want pepperoni? You want meat lovers?

What you want? No, no, no. I just want a plain cheese pizza or meat lovers. I don't really love pepperoni, but I like the other meats. But pepperoni is going to be on the meat lovers. I do love a sausage on a pizza. I do like a sausage, but like the crumbly sausage. Yes, the crumbly sausage.

Can we give you thin crust? Because you know, you just had a baby. Fatphobia. No, it's not. Fatphobia. It always comes back to the fatphobia. You just had a baby. you need to have a thin crust

so that maybe one day so that you will be thin because you're fat. Carolina, you've also said this. We're going to put this out here. You say, oh, people don't care

about pregnant people. I do think that. My friends are going to forget about me. So what do you want to put on the record that you want us to do as friends?

I do think that people, but here's the thing. I understand it now because I was the friend to the pregnant girl. You don't, like you care, but like,

Because you don't understand. You're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But if you're in, it's very isolating to be pregnant. I did feel isolated. But it wasn't because you did something to me. It was just like, I'm here in this moment by myself. Even with a husband. I was like, he's not pregnant.

You're not really by yourself, though. No, but I felt by myself because he's not pregnant. Right. Right? We're not having the same experience. He gets to sleep easy at night. Makes me angry. So what you wanted us to be pregnant.

Yes. And that would make me feel equal to you. Well, that would only be Miss Mamas over here. Carolina, have you ever set me up with a man? Not once. You never introduced me to somebody that you were like, Marie, I think you would like this person. Well, I haven't met anyone that I feel like works.

So therefore, that's why your baby's not going to have a friend in my baby. I mean, that's not my... I mean, what I am worried about is that the baby's not going to have any friends. Oh, let's talk about that mess. Hold on, hold on. You can't say that word now? Any what friends? How many what?

Prince. No. Black Jasmine. Your baby's not going to have no Black Jasmine. I'm a little afraid my baby's not going to have too many Black Jasmine. Why? I don't know. It's just the way the cookie has crumbled.

When I look around at who has kids, they're not the Black Jasmine. Black Jasmine is married, though, so she better start making her a damn baby. I messaged her the other day because she had on a loose-fitting dress, and I said, is there an announcement coming? And she said, absolutely not. Oh, my God. She would kill you. Why would you say that?

She said, absolutely not. Marie, that's so rude. Yeah, she's so rude. No, because, you know, she's svelte and has a great body. And she worked, you know, she's in shape. Oh, the wedding dress. What she wore to the wedding. She had, like, a loose thing at the wedding.

It was very, like, empire-wasted. But very chic. And I said, is there an announcement coming? And she said, no. Yeah. Absolutely not. That's rude. No.

I mean, she's not been married that long. I'll ask anybody if they're pregnant. I feel like she's only been married one or two years. You need more time, I think. Oh, I saw somebody the other day, and I was, like, looking at her belly, and I was like, is she pregnant? I couldn't tell. And she saw me staring and she said, oh, you didn't know I was pregnant?

And I was like, no. Oh, Maya. Yeah. Because I was like, you also didn't know. That's so good. It is messed to ask somebody if they're pregnant or when they do if you don't know them, though. It is. First of all, it's none of your business.

And if it was your business, they would tell you. I mean, I was delusional for a long time and didn't think I looked pregnant until like last month. But also, Carolina, you would put us in these, like, traps where it's like, oh, am I, oh, I can't say that you look pregnant, and I also can't say you don't look pregnant. That's not true. What are you talking about? You did do that to me. I don't know what you're talking about. Carolina, you absolutely did that to me.

You a gaslighter. You are. I don't remember doing that. You did that. That's crazy. Yeah, you did that. That's crazy. That's Carolina.

Or a friend. Or a friend. Oh, yes, our other friend. But our other friend, I did look pregnant, and she said I didn't. And I was like, so are you saying that me standing here with this pregnant belly is what I always look like? You think I just always have a huge stomach? And she's like, no, that's not what I'm saying. I'm like, but that is what you're saying.

That is what you're saying. Either I look pregnant or I don't look pregnant. But at the time, I did look pregnant. Girl, this is like a trick question. Like, come on now. You know what it is. I remember I was in church once and there was a pregnant lady

and I said oh my god what do you do and I hit the knee you know how you can you go down close to the belly you hit your knees like this oh my god what do you do and she said do for what and now I have to slide my body back up

and I was like huh and she said did you think I'm pregnant and I was like are you not pregnant and she was not never ask Never ask. And I was eye level with the belly when I said it. But I think I looked pregnant.

I was admitting that I looked pregnant. When I, well, I don't know. I'm going to just let you leave. Whatever you say, I'm like, yep. You be like, because sometimes you be like, I look a mess. I'm like, you look, you're glowing. You're beautiful. Why are you doing your eyes like that?

Was I pregnant when I said that? Yes. Because you feel like shit, babe. Oh, okay. Say that. I will say that. I will say that. it's like maybe you don't think

I look like shit but I feel like shit okay so say that so what feels like shit your back hurt your knees hurt also mentally like mental health

like hormones like you feel crazy I feel a little bit more normal now but before oh mentally oh oh it was

you're just like you feel really crazy you feel alone you feel like I'm the only one that's pregnant you're scared you're like my life is gonna be over like am I gonna be able

to go to the clubs Why do you need to go to the club, babe? Shut the club down, sis. Yeah, girl, the club ain't nothing to do with us. I'm a hater. Or, like, just in general, like, literally when we were out on Saturday, was that Saturday? I was like, oh, my God, this is so fun to be around people. And I've just been in my house being fat, ugly, tired.

So you see what you just did right there. Freaking myself with insulins. You see what you just did right there. I did see what she did right there. Okay. Because I said the word fat. Also, Carolina, you was in the house before you got pregnant. You was making the nails, show the nails.

Show the people the nails. She wouldn't go anywhere because she was doing nails. Oh, I got 12 orders today. Excuse me. I also, mental health. Like, I just wanted to be in the house by myself doing the nails. I obviously was not well. Now, when we said that, then we're, it's like, all right, okay.

You can call me unwell. You can call me unwell. I'm fine with that. Yeah, you unwell. For sure. But the listeners know, and everybody's a little bit unwell. Everybody is a little bit unwell. Everyone's a little bit unwell.

but you're unwell, plus dramatic, plus pregnant. I think you should do Broadway. I think you would be amazing. You know what? I will say, the other day, they called me to audition for a play, but I couldn't because I was pregnant. And I was a little sad. I was like, I miss the theater.

Was it Sunset Boulevard? No. Play, not a musical. A play. Oh, my bad. Not a musical. A musical and a play is different? Yeah, a musical has music and songs.

Yeah, but isn't a musical also a play? No. There's a musical and there's a play. That's crazy. You learn a lot on mess. Let's read a message so we can get you out of here. Okay, Carolina, you're going to listen to this and tell us if this is mess or if this is just living.

Yeah, let's talk about it. Ready? Yeah. So I've been living with my great friend for over a year now. We didn't write this. I was going to say, don't you dare. I would never. You think we that, like, genius?

Okay, anyway, we've known each other for over 15 years. Note, we're both Aries and we care about each other deeply. But we argue often as I am keeping up and I don't like his empty beer cans piling up in cases next to the trash bin for weeks on the dining room floor. Oh, OK. He called the cops on me because I wanted to throw out all his empty cans, even though I warned him I would do so. OK, thank God we've never done. Wait, what the hell? Why does he want? OK, go ahead. The cops came, took me outside where I called my mom at 430 in the morning. She came, swooped me up before the cops would take me. Anyway, I don't want to break my lease, but that's nasty and fucked up as fuck.

I'm stuck with this mug, and I don't want to break this lease against me. We're all right now, but it's awkward. What should I do? By the way, our old friends used to call him Jafar from Aladdin, which he actually looks like. Oh. Thank you for the visual. Okay, that is nasty. This is the...

I don't need to see a photo of anything, what the people look like. who was calling the cops because you didn't want him to throw them away he didn't want her to throw them away he didn't want her to throw them away because he was going to go get money for them I don't know I don't understand

that's not even that many cans I don't understand we are calling the cops because we anti-recycling no it wasn't about the recycling it was just being petty I think we're calling the cops but also you notice that they're like

the person that wrote it was like we're great friends my best friend both eerie and we fight a lot so they just have I think they're just toxic

we care about each other deeply but we argue we argue often yeah why are you saving the beer cans you got a sculpture

that you're working on or a diorama that you're building and I think that the person that called the police only did that because they don't think the other person will leave

they're toxic they have a thing they're doing so messy or just living messy It's definitely messy. Messy. No, well, the thing is, is that I think either they're living together or is he living with her?

What is it like? Well, it sounds like I don't want to break the lease. It sounds like they're roommates. Okay, so they're roommates and this guy is messy and he has all these beer cans. She was like, hey, if you don't throw them out, I'm going to throw them out. She threw them out. He called the cops. And she was like, the fuck?

At 430 in the morning? That is Jafar behavior. That is. that is absolutely Jafar that person is a menace and they are bad but also they're like fun

cause it's like I called the police that's fun? it's like fun in a way where it's like I called the police don't fuck with me calling the police is fun?

no in a way where it's like don't fuck with me you'll never forget don't fuck with me I don't wanna fuck with anybody who's calling the cops you'll walk away from this and you'll never forget

don't ever fuck with me that's how I felt about you and I's relationship yeah who? that I was scared of you? Serialgate

Oh, Serial Gate. Serial Gate was. You were the Jafar in that instance. She was the Jafar. Remember, she was the Jafar. Marie. And then she was so mad at me, she didn't talk to me for like, what, two months? Oh.

Months. You came back from L.A. and you still tried to hold the grudge. And I refused to accept it. It was in the middle of the pandemic, beginning of the pandemic. And I said, cut it out. Get over it. You don't got into a fight before? I'm done.

Carolina. Sydney, I have to agree with my sister. you were the Jafar in that situation you and you were the Jafar and I said let her have it let her have it

you was the Jafar in that Carolina you started it no I didn't you actually started it and you were being a diva you were just in a bad mood that day I think I think you were just

in a bad mood I've been eating cereal in my house I don't even know how long since that time except now all of a sudden I like cereal again

if you need to hear the cereal gate situation you gotta go back to an old episode of Unofficial Expert to hear Carolina's episode of Serial Gate. Did we talk about that on there?

Of course. Oh, we talked about it and people were like, they were like, I'm on Sidney's side and they're like, you know what, Marie, it's good that Marie stepped in

and they're like, you know what? Thank God that Marie stepped in. And then they were like, Marie, why are you taking Carolina's side? Once in my life, Marie did not betray me

and she stepped in and she was on my side. It was beautiful. Listen, I had all the facts. I made a decision based on what I know. You know I'm a mediator. Okay, lawyer.

Yeah. I'm a mediator. Stop that. What Carolina did went to you and you have a soft spot for Caroline

you're like what I can't believe that the ungrateful ass would do that and then you came like a guard and started

barking on me on the podcast Marie has a soft spot for me she does that's crazy she does Sydney

she does you actually Marie says crazy things to me all the time soft spot my ass my ass

my ass Sydney I was not barking at you on the pod I feel like maybe I need to go back and listen to the episode maybe I want to go back

and listen to it too everybody go back and listen to the podcast what I do remember is that when you tell the story back you make it you tell a whole

another story it is the remix it is the remix my love I know what I I know what I was a part of cause you know what happened she came in took the cereal box

she threw it at me and she said this isn't the right one you sad bitch thank y'all so much for listening to this long drawn out very close friend

conversation that's open to the public yeah thank you so much do you have a registry that should we post like what you want oh my god yeah

buy me baby gifts yeah yeah if y'all if y'all if y'all mess with it's gonna be in Sydney's bio on Instagram

absolutely not no it will not uh uh we'll put it in the story for 24 hours baby Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Carolina, miss Sid. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, my God. Miss Sidney wanting to get some gifts for the baby. Yeah. Carolina, we love you so much here. Tell people where they can catch, you know, your pod and your stuff that you got going on. I have a podcast called Hoes with Feelings with my friend Melissa Rich. And that's on everywhere you can get podcasts, Apple and Spotify. And I think that's it.

So maybe that's what it is. And then also my Instagram is at carobina if you want to see my dad and more stuff about Sydney. And your husband. Yeah. What about him? Are you going to post your baby? I don't know. She posts the husband.

She posts the dad. It's going to be really hard not to. What if he's really cute and I like showing him. Put a little thing on his face. Put it in your close friend. A little cut of beer. Maybe I'll put a thing on his face. Put him on close friends.

Don't do that. That's even more obnoxious. Just like post his feet. Put him on the close friends. I'll put him on the close friends in my stories It's gonna be hard not to show my baby We saw you in lingerie during the pandemic We know you like to show

Maybe I should do a I need to do a pregnancy photo shoot Oh you do Yeah I gotta figure that out You want me to do the artistic direction I do I would I think you would be okay with that

And I'll bring the clothes You know who I wouldn't let do it Why And Marie gets it Yeah well okay What the fuck does that mean Sydney happy Mother's Day

happy Mother's Day Carolina y'all please keep reviewing us on Spotify and Apple Podcasts also send us

your mess yeah what's your number let me look oh yeah if you guys can call us yeah call us we wanna hear your voices and the messages

don't need to be longer than 60 seconds yes please make it short I'm gonna give you 90 seconds cause that's how long you get for a reel on Instagram yeah that would be perfect

so get it all out you know what I mean Sorry, I didn't mean to be chewing on the pot. Wow, you really are busting it wide open, friend. I'm hungry. I'm pregnant. You have the number? We're going to the Cheesecake Factory after.

Don't forget to write in your messy stories at messthepodcast at gmail.com or, and I prefer this, call us at 763-280-6588. To have your messages read live on air. Repeat that one more time, Marie. Oh my God, girl. It's 763-280-6588. See you there. Love you guys.

Bye. Happy Mother's Day. Mess with Sydney Washington and Marie Faustin is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio podcast. Created and hosted by Sydney Washington and Marie Faustin. Executive produced by Olivia Aguilar and Han Sani. Super produced by Becca Ramos. Edited and mixed by Brian Jeffries. If you would like your messages read on air, please email us at messthepodcast at gmail.com

or call for your messages to be played at 763-280-6588.