MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - "The Hating Expert" with Langston Kerman

Episode Date: February 26, 2021

Langston Kerman returns to the pod as our "Hating Expert" and things get heated! Langston defines what a hater is to him, why he doesn't go online with his hate, and which celebrity teen he hates the most. Plus, Sydnee orders delivery right before coming into the recording and Marie has some words for her. Enjoy!----Listen to The Unofficial Expert Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus:https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus----BUY UNOFFICIAL EXPERT MERCH:https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-unofficial-expert-podcast----FOLLOW THE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT:https://www.instagram.com/UnofficialExpertFOLLOW SYDNEE:https://www.instagram.com/JustSYDbwhttps://twitter.com/justsydnycFOLLOW MARIE:https://www.instagram.com/Reeezyhttps://twitter.com/MsReeezyFOLLOW ANDREW:https://www.instagram.com/mcgui_guySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

forever dog hello oh hi maureen how are we how are we i see you have a glass of red wine over there right this is my after dinner before the podcast glass so i love that but i gotta leave it all the way over there because you know i got a black and white rug and every time i spill something i spill it on the white part so it's all happy black history month that's how it should be thank you so much thank you yeah you know what friend that's enough that's the other way to look at it thank you um the black side is still clean the white side dingy feels on brand hey marie i was actually thinking about getting a steamer uh for my apartment like a steamer like to steam the floors and the carpet you think that should be the move or no don't you have a cleaning man

you don't even clean doesn't he come with his own supplies no you know he comes from the bronx So I don't I don't think he would bring a whole steamer to East New York. What you think the steamer is going to do to your house is it's going to get rid of the cats. What? Tell us. Walk us through the thought process here. I think it's just good. It's good. It says it's good to disinfect the floors. It's good to get stains out of the carpet. You know what else does that sweeping, mopping, vacuuming. You could do all of those things. You don't need to get a steamer for your house.

okay so the verdict's out there will be no steamer at sydney's apartment great marie how are you feeling how are you doing i feel like you said all that but you looking at the tracking number for the steamer you just ordered i feel like you are already en route no no no no i first of all i wanted to uh check in with my black lady council and you said no so that's it's a no who told you you needed a steamer friend the facebook ads marie i need you to take me off facebook i gotta get off i don't know why but every day there's something that i'm like i need this i didn't talk about it and i need it i don't think anybody on this zoom has been on facebook this year in the last two years i'm gonna say that even andrew no not at all oh wow i saw that your

friend requested me though like a year ago whoa whoa whoa don't you fucking andrew take that back i i don't remember friending you oh really because let me check let me check right now bitch okay well i love when people pull up receipts on this podcast if there's any listeners out there that's looking for a producer intern hot gay sydney i got you a friend of andrew mcguire on facebook let it be official yeah when i don't let me can i see see the friendship well you're not making a lot of friends on facebook hun so that could have been from several years ago no friends since march 2020 if that's any consolation well it was a dark time it was right in the beginning of the pandemic so yeah that checks out right to be fair we was on lockdown

in march 2020 so i mean people were opening up their linkedin accounts so don't don't do that don't come for me not not none of these people here nobody here was opening up their linkedin on march 2020 into who marie uh you know i would love to start this off on a positive note so i was wondering if you had any any positivity to bring to the pod before we start i got some positivity for that ass so i went to stop and shop today to pick up a few items i said i'm gonna get up i'm start the day the week strong i'm a grown-up first of all the stop and shop on atlantic avenue is not where you should go don't don't go there if you're ever in brooklyn because i went in and i guess the time that i was there is like peak people asking you to get them stuff time because in one aisle

like four different people approached me at four different times i'm looking at the green um the peas right the sweet peas the green peas and some guy came up to me we make eye contact above his mask i'm like oh he's kind of cute he was like hey i was like hey he's like how you do i was like i'm good he's like you know i make music i'm selling it an album for a dollar i said oh i said i said good luck with that and he was like okay conversation over he left i'm looking at the the garbanzo beans now some other dude comes up a lady with lashes these crazy heavy lashes comes up to me hi sis you know i'm just wondering if you could help me buy a couple items i'm like sis i'm here to get my own groceries i can't help you today she's like that's fine

further down this same aisle this young dude comes up he's like hey i'm not homeless i have two dollars i just want to know i was like bro sir i said it's a lot of people in here begging today i can't help all of y'all he was like marie what were you wearing were you wearing your fur coat like what the fuck why did they think you all had so much money no but i had on my t-boss wig you know the asia wig oh yeah they were like okay she must have a chest tattoo or something she's one of us yo wealthy auntie wealthy auntie on the loose got it yo so i like scared this young dude away and then at the end of the aisle there was a dude kind of hanging out of a wheelchair like literally like tilting out of the wheelchair and i was like yo i'm okay come on marie what is about to happen

right here come on run these bits sis that you're gonna do on insta stories let's go this is not a bit it happened to me today not all of us use our podcast to try out material some of us are having actual conversations with the listeners a wheelchair a guy in a wheelchair a man in a wheelchair not yeah we've heard it all we've heard it all hanging okay show of hands how many people think i'm lying we we we so we have somebody who's selling a mixtape cd sis an album wait this is also in a store as well yeah andrew stop and shop across from the barclay center today at noon okay okay then they get in the wheelchair i was like okay if i make i didn't even want to make eye contact with him and i was like do you need help and he was like no and i was like you don't

need me to help you get out my way or nothing marie you're being ableist i'm not saying this i'm just saying what the listeners will write in the reviews we're ableist we're fat phobic but we're white phobic well i'm just if it makes the listeners feel any better everybody that i was talking to was black so what that make me now what that make me now problematic that's what it makes you sis whatever so okay well you didn't give him any money i didn't all right so that's That's what happened today. And then I left the supermarket so fast, I forgot half of the stuff that I went in there to pick up.

So now I got to go back to the store tomorrow to get eggs. Well, Marie, I cannot relate because I went to the bodega the other day and a woman asked me, could I help her get a knish? And I thought she wanted me to pick the knish up for her or like order it for her because I guess she couldn't speak. But she wanted me to buy it. and uh you know a black woman asking for a knish very cultural thing that is a knish it's for the jews it's for the jews it's for the jews are you allowed to say for the jews

okay okay you called me you i'm running bits but you what what bitch you running what meeting are you attending after this wait isn't it knish isn't that like a jewish a jewish dish it's it's the way you said it's the way you said for the jews well i'm getting older marie this is just how it comes out of your mouth once you hit 40. quiche? no a knish it's like a potato type like a like a latke no it's not it's not it's like a you know here let me they have knishes at the bar at the at The Bodega Bayou? That's astounding.

Yes. Okay. Why is it astounding? Because nobody here knows what that is. Well, people are just not cultured. Okay. A knish is a traditional Jewish snack food consisting of a filling covered with dough that is typically baked and sometimes deep fried. Knishes are usually purchased from street vendors in urban areas with a large Jewish population.

well I haven't seen a Jew in this neighborhood since I got in this bitch but anyway she asked for it and I was like well maybe maybe her homeless boyfriend is Jewish I don't know but I got but I got it for her it was

actually $1.50 and I said I had it well actually I had $10 out and that's why I was like I was about to say I don't think I have enough but I got it anyway Sydney roll yo Sydney just picked up a phone call i gotta go okay my my delivery is outside one second um marie can you can you talk to andrew

for one second i'm sorry no i'm on break if sydney's on break i'm on break i too am on break i'm not on i'm not on break i'm i told you that i was getting food you could have thrown you could have intro the guest and we could have had a whole conversation without you is what i don't want to have the conversation without their guests so i'm gonna intro the guests as soon as you get up i'm intro him bye go go get your food bye ah and we're back listen nobody knows what a knish is andrew did you google it what the what the google image is a hot pocket with stuff in it they look like little like dumplings almost all right like ready dumplings okay well they sound nasty um well let's bring the guest in just to get on sydney's nerves uh he's been on the podcast

before you love him you know him he's our esteemed uh light-skinned guest for black history month today give it up for our hate expert our hating expert langston kerman hey what up what up welcome to the most racist problematic podcast available on the internet well your podcast is more problematic than our podcast i don't know y'all niggas are shining right now y'all really acting up on this podcast you went on a whole rant about how a wheelchair man didn't deserve money and then no I didn't say the wheelchair man didn't deserve money but I needed him to get out my way he was in the middle of the aisle that's not how I heard it I heard you you say you wanted to scoot him out of your way

so that you could close your fur coat like Cruella DeVille that's the way I heard first of all it was a green trench um second if you're in the store and people are asking you for money or just out because there's a lot of homeless people in LA I'm not saying anybody at the supermarket was homeless today because they all looked very with homes so when people approach you for money or ask you to buy them stuff how do you usually react see here's the here's the difference between LA and New York and I forgot this uh very valuable uh tidbit now that I've been in LA as long as I have is uh we keep ours outside you know what i mean like we're very unkind to to our unhoused friends and and it should be looked at and solved but frankly the one thing they do effectively is

make sure the motherfuckers aren't allowed in uh businesses and certainly not allowed to uh beg for money at in when they come into business i don't know when i lived in la i would see homeless people at the open mics like on the buses at nighttime and at open mics doing stand-up so it was like yeah well that's not a business they respect they're not going to protect our open our best open micers in the world they only care about the i don't know i don't know what happened to him he said he was outside he's not outside he's not picking up the phone call whatever girl ain't nobody worried about your food that ain't that ain't what we talking about we're talking about the homeless community right now oh okay okay all right well she coming in talking about food

and her Postmates delivery. What'd you order? Tell us what you ordered. I ordered salmon teriyaki with a What's wrong with that? What does that mean? Is salmon with a teriyaki glaze? I was going to put

that tone on whatever you said. Oh, okay. It made no difference. You could have said the most reasonable meal and I was going to be like, this is all dumbass. Fried oysters. Shut up. That's Amari.

and then is it sides or something yeah there's it's a it's a bento box okay here he is here he is you see this you see how she jump in and she jump back out and her mouth is on her mouth on the mic and everything right she don't even care about the quality of your podcast

no timing to this she just is answering the way she would regularly answer now she's upset and you know what happened she probably put the wrong address listen of her own home of her own home it's wild now she ain't she's not even putting the this is crazy she threw a microphone like frankie i'm sorry i'm so sorry he was running like i had ordered it a while ago and they were running behind and now he's even more behind and

it's like what the fuck okay i'm sorry i apologize thanks and i know that you're very busy i'm sorry I am devastated by this unprofessional behavior. Langston, what would you be doing if you weren't on the podcast right now? My wife wanted to go to Bed Bath & Beyond, and I got out of it because of this. So what you should be doing is thanking us. Yeah. Yeah. No, listen, I appreciate what you've done, but I also expect that this is going to run

long because Sydney wanted salmon teriyaki in the middle of it, which means that it then is going to obstruct my evening in a different kind of way because you know you know she's going to be eating it on the pod oh she's going to eat on the pod no I don't Marie when's the last time I ate on the pod she's going to duck down and be like when's the last time I

haven't done that Marie last Wednesday I don't know Sydney Marie where's the like where's the sisterhood in this bitch like Sydney we're literally watching you ordering food getting up to go get it and you're like where's the sisterhood sis

I'm telling you what you're doing this is exciting I've never seen a friendship tear apart in front of my own eyes but this is you already just won't have my back she'll just like throw me under the bus Sydney the bus is the postmates

delivery man that's bringing you salmon teriyaki first of all I said it up top I said hey guys I had ordered way before this podcast was starting they're behind they're behind this is not my fault when you say way before what time did you an hour ago friend an hour ago at 8 22 yeah all right guys whatever she's never gonna forgive us this is terrifying

i just i'm like come on now give me a break she's just hangry because she hasn't eaten anything yet today the salmon teriyaki is about to be her first meal that's what it is yes absolutely that's exactly what it is that that ain't got nothing to do with us baby girl i'm sorry good to know marie good to know thank you appreciate you much sis i feel like when people when the reviews come in for this episode they're not gonna say marie did anything wrong sydney they're gonna say man langston sure sounded uncomfortable the reviews are in and that nigga was nervous it went from being kind of silly to not silly no more.

But tell us when it got not silly no more. Tell us exactly when that happened. Hard to know. We were giggling and then Sam and Teriyaki got two minutes later and oh boy. Oh boy. Changed the energy real fast.

It's fine. Do what you guys want. Whatever you want with the pod. It's above me now. It's above me. not me i'm still here i'm stuck in it right on right on ground zero of the eruption of this podcast here i am sydney you order food during hobby hunters stop it i'm asking that that's a real question uh-oh now we're bringing up other shit yeah marie

didn't have to happen yeah i'm like what are you talking about sis like i ordered it an hour ago you'll be in your house and you'll come like 12 minutes later you're like oh you know i started doing my hair before the pod like it's it's okay yes sydney i'll do that at the beginning of the episode and then we'll start we'll do the podcast and i'm not interrupting and like getting like we still talking about your fish that's not even there yet it's not my fault i ordered it an hour before the podcast it was supposed to get here before they're late this is not my fault where'd you order it from is is it at least a lovely uh facility is it a good restaurant i order from it all the time and it's always on time it always takes 40 minutes i can't pronounce the name of

the place that's why you're late because you can't pronounce the name they're like well she she playing with us we gonna play with her too oh my god yeah it's great okay well i i don't know i don't know what to do this it's still not here he told me two minutes it's been two minutes they there are running very behind and it's either been two minutes or the longest 30 seconds of my life and i don't know which one it's been longer than two minutes because now we we 19 minutes in and when sydney came back it was 13 so it's been right uh right so langston i'm sorry for wasting your time today no i'm chilling i i listen here's what i would love uh ladies let's let's get sydney her food let's recalibrate let's be friends again and then let's talk about hating

shit that's that's the kind of evening i would love for us all to have if thank you for mediating this uh i mean hold on let me be realistic here if the fool get there in 20 minutes we gonna start the podcast again in 20 minutes no i'm gonna have him leave the food at the door how about that i'll leave the food at the door i won't go and get it how about that i'll do that i'll do that for the pod because i apologize for this happening i'm so sorry this is so unprofessional i really apologize i'm so sorry i don't know that sounded a weird way a weird sarcastic it didn't sound like you were sorry the tone didn't feel sincere sis man i gotta stop i'm i'm antagonistic you are which is no no no it's totally fine Langston we appreciate you for spending your time dealing with

this unprofessional podcast that's from the ghetto and it's from the ghetto because of me oh the podcast is from the ghetto oh yeah because it's it's from me for me I'm making it ratatata because we're now almost 30 minutes in and we have not started but we have that salmon teriyaki go ahead okay okay so so what is the plan then friend because we can still have a conversation but you're saying that we can't we can have a conversation I feel like as soon as you have a conversation then the salmon teriyaki is gonna show up I'm not gonna go get it I just said that I'm not gonna go I'm gonna have him leave it at the door I'm gonna let it be cold so that I can do this podcast is he gonna be able to get into your apartment no he's not gonna be able to get

in an apartment so it's just gonna sit outside yes that's what i'm gonna do sydney you're not gonna let your that seems unreasonable and uh the whole thing the whole thing is being unreasonable because all right blaming me for something that i had no control over well you could have called you should you could have ate earlier sis it's nighttime so you had control over that you're making a fight back in no i'm not doing this with you marie you always start things literally a minute before the podcast and you're like oh well you know I had to go to the bathroom and then you're here and we're like

well why didn't you just go to the bathroom hold on Sydney don't do that please don't do that me going to the bathroom is not a 22 minute conversation on our podcast don't do that hey y'all be Simone trending again and it's not good news

okay Langston what is she trending for let's switch gears a little bit Because she went on a long rant saying that women sit around talking about all the different qualities that they expect of a man, a certain height requirement, a certain money requirement, a certain education, a certain connection to their family and friends. and uh you all don't this is her words not mine but you all don't uh have that for yourselves that you haven't spoken to your own mothers in six months you expect me to be deeply connected to to my family i mean i think that's true with uh people of both sexes people have sure like there are lots of people who are like unqualified for the person that they think they should be with

um but not all women and not all men no i agree with that but it's only funny if b simone's getting made fun of for dumb shit that she said without any of that perspective so you know is b simone with somebody right now i would i would say with uh with the hand of god b simone is is in a relationship with the hand of god and unfortunately it seems to be god's backhand at the moment but but he got that hand on her somebody said was b simone not begging a man under five nine to like her and was bigging up danny lee and basically saying she damn near one because she's latina she has the self-esteem of a broom but wants to punch down not going for that we love twitter oh my god it just it will never stop it's it's undefeated my favorite part of

the video is she's uh she's not wearing a bra in the video while she's like slapping a table and ranting and her uh jingles are jangling and whatnot and uh you can see her getting more and more self-conscious of it as she gets more and more confident in her backwards ass rant about being the better version of yourself in order to find the man you deserve. Sydney, I pray to God you're about to go get this salmon. I personally

just don't. They got a 20% tip. I want to take it back. I don't know what this is about. This is like over an hour and a half. The food has to be cold on God.

This is truly not my fault but what them temperatures like in new york right now like 30 alexa what's the temperature it's like oh you ask alexa you got money 32 degrees fahrenheit i didn't i should have asked my google hey google shut up alexa she said enjoy your monday um okay i don't understand why women feel like they need to make these proclamations about other women and post them to their followers but not all not all women are like that yeah i i always uh i maintain this feeling that i think that uh it's often a choice of trying to impress some dudes like it's a very specific type of dude that's gonna look at that and be like yeah this bitch gets it and it's like

i guess that's who they're aiming for because it's definitely not other women who are going to be like yeah you nailed it sis it's like no i i i think it's more about it's easier to talk about other people than to talk about yourself it's easier to say well you've done this that that that's wrong but to look inward and be like this is actually my story it's so hard to present that it's like why are you talking about everybody else's business except your own that's weird right like why isn't b simone talking about women who sell books that they plagiarize and then say yeah that is a manifestation book like why is she not talking about women that do that yeah yeah what that b stands for focus on that find out what the b stands for and then we

can you can get into to all the the rights and wrongs teriyaki here i pray to god it is because i still got that tension in my chest i don't but i know i just this is where you pee okay whatever langston what did you eat today how about that let's see what food did you eat today uh so far i've had uh i only have one meal as well but it's it's much earlier here i i had a tender greens plate oh that i enjoyed quite a bit like tender greens but that's only an LA thing oh they don't have tender greens in New York

what did you get what protein tender greens pop I got myself a tuna nicoise salad nicoise that's right I believe it's French I believe so too or a whole bunch of shit nicoise

that's the direct translation how we doing on that salmon teriyaki it's in your home it's good fuck yeah let's start the podcast we're starting it hot 30 minutes in let's do it let's do this it's gonna be worth it

it's gonna be so fun I can't wait I'm so excited okay okay I don't start whoever starts okay well we left off with Marie talking about her like shop right

homeless expedition and we ended on be Simone so I think we can just intro Langston and move on from there. All right. Y'all got to be nice to each other first. Everybody's got to be

It's clear that Marie doesn't. She doesn't want to move on. She's got like the attitude face and it's like I have that attitude face. You do Marie. You have that attitude the entire episode. No I haven't. And now I have attitude face. You guys are attacking me For attacking you, Sydney.

You sound like a white woman right now. Attacking you? That's the language that people who are not being attacked use. Attacking you. What? Seriously? You're giving me a hard time about the delivery. I didn't even say anything else.

You did, Marie. We're going to run the tapes back. You did. I said I didn't say anything else. You said we were going to restart. So go ahead and intro Langston, sis. The air is thick. but we're gonna cut through it and we're gonna have a great time i'm gonna get more wine

i'm gonna bring a bottle in here because yes sydney introduced the guest no marie i'm not doing this like either we're gonna do it right or we could cut the we could cut it tonight because i'm not i'm not doing this it was an accident i'm sorry and i just i want to have a good podcast we have been having a good podcast i feel like you're missing it that's what we i'm fine andrew's fine we're gonna listen back to this and laugh and it'll be great okay langston any input here yeah there's a chill in the air uh a cold chill running up my spine it feels like sleepy hollow in my home but i'm fighting through it all right let's let's move forward we're have we have a a good old guest that we haven't had

in over many many years but when he came here he was the light-skinned expert and now he's come to to one up that expert i mean he's been on many many shows after that very one of our most famous friends uh give it up for langston kerman and he's our hating yeah yes all right it's like deja vu hi langston hey everybody it's good to see y'all with no other context it is what a dream to see you both with no other information ahead of this moment oh what a treat wow wow yes and andrew you as well i didn't mean to leave you out what a pleasure oh my gosh it's great to meet you obsession this whole thing langston you seem like such a lovable likable person so hating expert yeah i i uh i this is all a ruse this is a long con that

i've i've learned to build over the years to uh to get all my hate out i realize that it's easier to just smile and wave than it is to scowl and uh let people know how you really feel especially if you don't want to square up which i do not more often than right fighting is no fighting it's not my thing i'll roast you i'll uh write something backhanded on a piece of paper and uh hand it to you as i run away but i don't want to fight nobody that ain't my shit have you ever sorry but rip but i was gonna say have you ever been in a fight i have been in fights before uh i would say i i'm at a i'm at a uh uh like a two and two record you know what i mean this kid ari who was a friend of mine growing up smacked the shit out of me one time when we

were fighting over basketball and whoo i didn't win that one but then i got another fights in school where like I did all right I nobody was walking away like hey don't fuck with Langston no more that nigga's crazy but I did pretty good so you're so you're like I'm I'm being easygoing for the system but really in internally you're like you hate everything yeah yeah there's very few things uh particularly related to the things that I care about that I enjoy well well that sounds very new york of you that sounds like through and through a new yorker yeah but i'm not from new york and i ain't got no reason to behave this way we're kind decent people yeah nope well chicago's an exception i think i've maintained this for a lot of years that

chicago is a city built on hate that like uh that's how we propel each other forward is by being haters through and through okay so we have a bunch of different types of people who listen people from all over the world we're very famous international international uh so what is a hater like if you don't like something are you a hater or is it more than that you know i think that's a good question i think that hating is not liking something that you could have just let live oh okay that sounds like the oxford definition yeah i mean i imagine i imagine people with uh with a more whole heart you know what i mean if the whole if all the pieces in your heart are fully formed you see something you don't like and you process it and you know i don't care for that

too much and you move on with your day you have a nice a nice salmon teriyaki if you will you enjoy a nice meal you know what I mean but a hater yeah now a hater you're gonna let that simmer you're not gonna be able to enjoy your meal because you got that you got that extra sitting in your chest right you're gonna write a dissertation about it online and be like well I never liked anything that this person did anyway and that's that's where I take issue I don't go online with my shit I keep it private it's it's not meant for the public but I do tell quite a few people in group chats and uh smaller circles smaller networks of people about how I feel and that's perfect because now you're on this pod and we can really get into this hateration

holleration now I I look at a hater I look at a hater and something is good and they are hater and they're just gonna they're gonna shit on it regardless of how oh that's how I look at it so you think oh okay so to be a hater something has to to objectively be quality and then somebody has to be coming in and just trying to to scuff it up for no good reason yes scuff is a good word um thank you i uh i freestyled that one i i'd say that that the difference for me is that i don't actually think that that many things exist that are objectively good okay okay i think i think there's a lot of shit that people will tell you are good is good or tell you or want you to believe is good but if you really look at the shit it's fine it's all right it is a lot of fine that

people elevate to amazing or excellent decent it's decent so langston just give us a couple things that you hate that you think most people like and I don't know how I don't know how to do this because now you got that weird uh that weird motion going you well no because you got I but because I agree with the definition that you and Sydney both gave um kind of but I also but I also don't like a lot of things that people like and sometimes I don't like things that people like specifically because so many people like it like oh for me sometimes the more people enjoy one particular thing the more I want to just like not be a part of that at all oh see I don't I don't know that I have that I don't think I get oppositional that I think that's

oppositional I think I would define that differently like that to me is like y'all motherfuckers ain't gonna tell me how i'm supposed to feel and i think i hope that uh my hating while unhealthy and probably gonna kill me by 55 is not rooted in just like a uh a want to to uh just move against the grain if you will okay but i but this this is this is where i'm like okay hating you could if something you think is bad i think it's okay to think that it's bad but i think that if you're going out of your way to trash it publicly um i think that's like real hater behavior that it was it's unnecessary you just not like it and not watch it well here's what i'd ask you when and this is a very r kelly quote of it oh when we say public how public are we

talking you know when you say i'm talking how old are we talking that's an r kelly quote ew you ain't never heard that he was talking to uh what's his name uh i can't remember his name from bet he had the afro real skinny guy uh toray he was talking to ray in the interview right after the trial after he had been acquitted and to raise first question to r kelly is uh robert do you like teenage girls and then he thinks for a second he thinks real hard on and he says all right when you say teenage how old are we talking literally 13 right to 18 I think 13 to 19 19 I'd say 19 is included as well anything with the word teen in it Robert well to uh to answer your question I think like some journalists they go

out of their way or people who are critics they go out at like critics I think you should be focused on it on the stuff that you like and you not writing about the things that you don't like is speaking volumes that oh it must maybe it's not good because you're not giving it uh that energy but critics who go on and on and on on the internet to be like yeah that special wasn't good that comedian is not good this was that movie is trash and they they more so talk about how bad things are than the good things i think they're using their platform and in a in a bad way they could do better it's just focused on like a critic's job is to be critical of the thing that they're reviewing and they're haters a lot i think a lot of critics want to be in the position

that they're critiquing they're like oh i wish i could make that movie or i wish i could be an actor but they're not if you look at a lot of the critics especially in comedy they wanted to be comedians and failed and now they're critiquing comedy who the fuck are you you didn't it didn't even work out for you so now you're in a position to be like yeah that's special uh homophobic blah blah blah and it's just like dude talk about the stuff that you like i i will say that i don't i i take a lot of issue with uh critics while i do love hate and uh i i live by it i thrive in it i was born you're wallowing i wallow in it i i do take a lot of issue for the exact reasons that you're saying sydney but then i think about like uh who would i want to critique the actual shit

like if i wanted like an honest perspective on what it is and i don't think comics could do that either i don't think our peers could genuinely give us a real response of like what the shit is either nope because a lot of people that in in that part of it i agree with sydney and that if when you listen to comics review other stand-up specials there are a lot of people who will use that time to hate because they didn't get that opportunity because they didn't get to shoot that and blah blah blah i think there's more hate there but i also think people throw the word hater around i mean ever since meno did that song in 2000 whatever everybody i hate her and it's like no i just don't like this i don't think everything is hating sometimes something is not

good i do think i will say that that i think the advancement of that is when you you start to try to sway other people's opinions on that issue right that be it's small or large at the point that you're like now taking this to a larger group and being like hey this is stupid right you're you you're adding some hate to the mix i won't call you a hater but you're you're hate-ish you're you're a kenya barris uh uh pilot hate coming to to disney channel with disney plus hate-ish is is what he's working on okay wait so langston you're not gonna tell us some some things that you don't like well no because then we're gonna fall into the the the dangerous space that i've set up for myself i've created quite a net i don't want to lose my net yeah but this is

it could be lightning it could be lightning round and we'll just be like oh i like that oh no i don't like that oh yeah okay i i think that's a good one all right y'all start it off y'all say what you like and then i'll tell you why it's stupid i love that okay i i like the i like the animation soul i thought that was nice i i love a good story about mortality and uh i did i will say that all the critiques of it being a black film were dumb as fuck and i i hated the the response okay we're talking about hate i hate yeah uh so many of the takes that have now become very common in terms of black media where we see a black person and then it has to now be representation of all blackness soul was not a black film no it was a film about mortality starring jamie foxx drawn as an a roy

wood jr type character yeah and that's not the same thing do you know what i mean like that's not a black film it wasn't built for black people the fact that we can identify ourselves and it just means a type of progress that we should be celebrating whereas i think princess and the frog is much more of an actual like slight against black people if you want to unpack that in some kind of way well yeah because she was a frog for 90 of the movie and then the rest of the movie she was a maid's daughter she was uh yeah i think it it's a reflection of of their inability to imagine us as anything other than some real shit like it being based in new orleans like y'all and make up a bunch of whimsical ass

countries for every other princess that's a conversation to be had but that nigga soul he was that's just that nigga soul his name wasn't even soul just playing the piano and being his best self

I got no complaints okay okay Andrew is there something that you like or hate or are we hating on Justin Timberlake well I've never liked him so yeah Justin Timberlake's a dumb bitch I I think he I think he manipulated and listen I was a big fan for years I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy the music 2020 experience I saw it I enjoyed it oh you went to the show so good no no no I just I just met with it I was like oh you

really gave him your dollars got it but nah yeah he's a bad guy that that apology was a uh an embarrassment just him like slightly apologizing for really mean things that he did to a number of people over the years without any accountability is you don't get to just be like I might have hurt some folks and and my bad on that one he said I'll get you guys next time I'm not gonna probably like moonwalking off beat when he was like and like hey Janet I'm gonna get you a new bra I'm gonna take care of you baby girl cover them titties up he's such a mess we don't like him um okay something random that i like or don't like is that what is that what we're doing i don't i forgot i don't know this y'all show well i was asking you to list some things and we was going

just lightning round it that's what i asked i'm scared i'm scared to tell you about the things that actually upset me because why it's too close in proximity and too dangerous for for anybody's brand you guys have a brand to protect too no we don't i don't think you really understand the pod we've been doing it for four years we have said the messiest some of the outlandish problematic things on here and we're i mean we're still working i don't think it's that problematic the things that we've said we've we're just honest and um we stand in our um our truths that's it that's all i've never i mean i've made i've made fun of people on here that i'm like oh they could definitely listen to this and be like bitch what 100 but i'm not making we're

not making blanket terrible statements about i think sometimes we no no no beige community but that's you know that's that's a given that's fine i always forget that y'all call beige white people beige growing up i was referred to as beige and it never not doesn't hurt my feelings when i hear y'all say it doesn't hurt your feelings or it does oh it does hurt my feelings every single time i i it reminds me of a story when i was uh growing up my my mother's second husband okay uh listen she's at four uh her second yes we do we go off mom here huh what's your mom's name wanda wanda yes yes yeah i think this last one's gonna stick he's a good man They live in Ghana now. Anyway, my mom, her second husband, their family lived in Cabrini Green, which is a very famous project building or series of buildings, a collection of buildings, if you will, in Chicago.

They no longer exist. But we went to visit them one time for Easter and we were in the building and I had never met his family before. This is my first time meeting the family. And I walked in the building and we're sitting in their apartment. And then the children, the other children of this home, there's like four of them, call to the other neighbors in the building. they like go have a meeting out in the hallway of this project building and then they bring the neighbors to the door and they go hey y'all look at our white cousin look at him look at our white cousin they make me stand in the doorway so that they could show their their friends their peers that they have a white cousin and then i told their daddy and they got the ass whooped so you know i'm a big snitch too we can do that if y'all more focused on snitching i do that too well Langston did you used to be like a really

pale child because no these were just children who didn't see white people that often and I was the closest thing that they knew as a reference you you're that you're the tannis of the light skins that I

know so you got some color color on your face yeah you know melanated Wanda Wanda did what she could well your is your is your dad wait is it who's who's my father is white on your side your father is white the kerman part the kerman part is the white one we did we did talk about that uh many years ago on the light-skinned expert y'all go back to that it was great okay so you don't you don't want to talk about what you actually hate and i i

understand it because you know you're you're on the boys you're right for many shows i mean you you have i can get into general themes let's get into some themes i think that's a good place to land us maybe that'll that'll help open this flower up a little bit eh i i say you are the white cousin i don't know the canadian sometimes i'm sometimes i'm a little australian who knows why i talk the way i talk mate okay mate i just if you hear something if you hear something that's been buggered yes i've just i was just gonna say if you're gonna be the hating expert i need you to hate something i need to hear something okay let's get into it okay here's something that's been uh ruffling my feathers as of late uh grinding your eyes yeah this is grinding and

shit out of my gears i take a lot of issue with the the manipulative uh behavior of the internet there's been quite a lot uh of things that i've been tracking as of late claudia conway let's get into that okay there's a lot of manipulation happening around this little girl who uh who is basically just a a a misbehaving child if you ask me a badass 16 year old behaving the way that many 16 year olds do i'm not calling that good or bad or deciding that she's safe or unsafe i truly don't know but what i do know is all you sick fucks at home who are sitting there and retweeting her and telling her how brave she is are fucking crazy you're 30 there's no 16 year old in the world that i would ever like uh uh big up and be like you're so brave you're a champion you should

be supported shut the fuck up and figure it out like the rest of the 16 year olds how old is the little girl that's traveling the world and not going to school on a boat how old is that girl who's that greta how old is she i believe she's also 16 ish she got to be like 9 or 10 or something like that no i think she's older than 9 she ain't been to school since 2002 How old is she, Andrew? Greta is 18. 18. Really?

I know who she is. The face is giving. Okay. Wow, she looks good. Okay, well, she's been through a lot. No, I thought she was younger than 18. Good for her. Well, she's got a green skincare program is what she does.

She's all green. No pesticides or preservatives in her lotions. That ozone layer serum that she's using. I love this for her. um i mean but now she's on but now uh the the the conway chick is american yeah and i think that's hugely unhealthy and i shame on katie perry shame on lionel richie and shame on that other one whose name i don't know for for involving themselves in the life of a child who is not particularly talented by all accounts it wasn't like she nailed the audition you guys

are just advancing this so that you can advance a problematic story and create a Britney Spears this is how you fucking create this shit because we obsess over a human being instead of being honest about a sickness that's happening I feel so you know I was gonna

say I feel like when's the last time we talked about American Idol American Idol needs this more than they need anything else it's not about Claudia it's it's not about Kellyanne it's let's do this thing it's gonna propel us as a trending topic it's gonna be

something that people are gonna be talking about on news on blah blah blah and that's what it because I watched a little piece of the audition and I was like oh I have to cut this off I don't know what key she's singing on this is she don't know either she just she just being 16 and that's okay very tone deaf I think that that's the beauty of 16 as a former educator I I watched 16 year kids walk up to me and me like mr carmen this is my dream i want to do this and i had to listen to their bullshit and i had to go i don't know man try your best but i don't i don't retweet it and tell everybody how brave they are and like complain about their home situation i help them navigate as an honest person caring about them but this is also tv right like i don't look at american idol

as a real talent show yes it has propelled people who are talented but i don't most of the things on tv is not based off talent there's all these like ulterior motives and things that they want to uh uplift or take down and and and that's what it's all about it's all about the storylines that's why reality tv is the way it is it's some producer being like all right now now okay so we gonna get them in this room and we gonna make this this argument happen they it's all for for viewership they need people to tune in and nobody wants to tune in and see people just having a regular time they i think i think that's absolutely fair and i can't argue with that at all but i do think that for every person who goes on the internet and advocates for the safety of this individual

while simultaneously propelling them through the drama you are a hypocrite you are part of the problem that you are complaining has been created much in the way of the britney spears fans who are now like constantly advocating for her to be released from her father's grasp meanwhile the reason that she is in her father's grasp is because you obsessed over her so often and so long that the tabloids felt like they had to service your obsession it's but it wasn't it wasn't and then complain about the sickness but the thing about britney spears is it wasn't just her fans that were obsessed with her people were like hate watching and hate reading the britney spears stuff as well and i think that really is what propelled it because people that didn't even

care about britney spears were like she shaved her head look look at her with this umbrella hitting this car like the fans weren't saying that they were like oh i think she looks good or they were like oh i hope she's okay but it's the other it's the other side of it also that we gotta we have to think about is the hate watching i did i think but i would argue and this actually gets me into a a slightly different subject but similar uh in in theme is i think that there are quite a few people who know and and knowingly uh uh invest themselves in their own sort of like opposition in their own fight right that like the fans while they weren't rooting for her to lose did want britney news at all times so they weren't fighting the idea that britney was becoming more

and more sick they still wanted britney to be in front of them all the time so yes i agree it wasn't like they were going on and being like look at this dumb bitch with a bald head and an umbrella but they meanwhile do want a reason to argue on the internet so when people when britney acts up that gives them something to now push against when they go leave britney alone it's not it's not uh just defending britney it also is propelling them forward no but the internet was completely different when those tabloids was coming out it had nothing to do with the internet it was more like society loves making a star they love to see the journey they want to lift lift lift lift people up and then when you get to the point of like oh this is annoying now they want to see

you fall they love to see when a celebrity is being messy and going to rehab they did it to lindsey lohan they they do it to even whitney houston they they love to see oh yeah she doing crack now like we're getting mad at these journalists right we're mad at barbara walters but barbara walters was doing no no no it wasn't barbara walters it was diane sawyer don't don't do barbara like diane sawyer sorry sorry so sorry she's a nice yeah yeah no no diane sawyer's a weird whisperers he's a little different but yeah barbara yeah diane soyer but at the time this this is what we tune in for you know 2020 this is these are the reasons why we want to see we want to see the behind the music we the e hot e true hollywood stories they're asking the messy

questions that will get get the the little blurb that you need to hear that people will be like oh okay i'm gonna read about this i want to know more i and i would say that that that to me is part of the sickness I feel the same way about like the way that people manipulate the black experience now back like it's a bunch of people who if you took away black suffering wouldn't have anything to tweet about wouldn't have anything to to sort of build their identity on and I for one I enjoy being black for a multitude of reasons that ain't got shit to do with slavery and anything else that was problematic in our history and while I'm not advocating in any way i don't want your listeners to turn on me i'm not advocating in any way that we ignore that history

that we pretend the shit didn't exist but get the fuck out of here that every day you got to bring up some sad news shut the fuck up and tweet about your shit well see langston that's how i feel about a lot of the black films and a lot of the content that like celebrating black voices and It's always somebody getting beat up or whipped or lynched. I can't watch that stuff. My soul, okay, call back, can't, that, I can't. I don't, every time I see, like, something happens crazy with, like, the police or a black person, I don't watch those videos because I don't need to go to sleep seeing those things.

I don't watch, I'm not, I've never seen 20 Years a Slave. I'm done watching slave movies. I don't, I haven't seen Harriet. I haven't seen The Help. i don't need to see these things because i first of all i've read the books i know what happened my my mind already knows but my my soul and my brain and my conscious i don't need to see the visuals to to support black things or to like be a real black person but i just i wish that they were still making movies that are as like black people being as stupid as white people are allowed

to be in their movies can can we can we can we do a black dude wears my car can we do hell yeah i want to see a movie where a black man fucks a pie and none of us make it about race it's purely just a man who is horny for pie and and it's it's called negro american pie you can call it something it's called it's called peach cobbler that's what it's called yeah it could it could it could be a blackberry pie whatever you want it to be i mean they just i think that i i am against like hating on social media even though it helps some people's careers I think it

it's instant gratification that's not healthy and it doesn't it doesn't cultivate better talents you know what I mean because they want everything to be so quick and like a sound bite and they want 60 seconds and they want to be able to

oh this is digestible real quick and then everybody could share it and then oh boom this person is a star and it's like when I was growing up like people literally comedians had to go on tour to actually get their fan base there was no I'm gonna put up this one minute stand-up clip and then now I'm touring I'm in Australia like it's just even further I would say that a fair amount of the people who are able now to do all of that when they get in person aren't that good at the thing like there's so many of

them and you know again i'll be careful but i i think you're trying to say it's a lot of like people from uh tiktok and youtube and what's the one the one and and instagram and a whole bunch of other space we can hate on tiktok i'm i'm for hating on but they can't dance on tiktok i'm gonna say that they're in a multitude of spaces sort of like uh accessing resources that that rightfully belong to them because they're good at whatever that thing is. But also now these titles are being applied to them that aren't realistic to what

they can do. You know what I mean? Like every fucking list that you see on Vulture, Variety, whatever it is, is a list of motherfuckers who can't follow me. And that's crazy. You know what I'm saying? That's wild. Langston, let's discuss these lists.

Langston has not been on any of these lists, mind you. But it's fine. It's fine. I don't have PR. I'm not going to go play that game in the same way that they are. And I think what I'm saying more importantly is go crazy. If that's the type of thing that you want to do, I'm not here to stop you, but I am going to hate on it and I am going to fully acknowledge. I know what trick you're playing, but the audience doesn't.

They don't know that you pay somebody to help you get, you know, attention in a certain type of way, but I do. And that's, I found out, I found out about that last year. I was like, oh, niggas is getting publicist. And then I found out how much a publicist is in us. I said, I could not ever go in my pocket. $5,000. $5,000.

And that's for a short amount of time. That's not a publicist for the year. They do a little, they do a roundabout for like whatever you're doing press for. And then they're done. Then you got to do. Then it's another $5,000. You got to pay them again. Wow.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I went to a meeting and they were like, the guy was like, I love the podcast. I love you guys. You know what you need? a publicist what they're like yes you and marie should split how much it costs i said how much five thousand dollars i said why would we pay that why don't people just say that we're good

and we get the press right now she's calculating the numbers she pulled out her phone i said we don't have the money two thousand five hundred dollars each i said i'm yeah i said scrounge that up no we don't i said if you think i told the guy in the meeting i said if you think we're that good you should pay for a publicist for us i said there's no way you could tell the artists that i my broke ass needs to pay we gotta start talking about titties or something on the podcast we gotta change the the cover art yeah that's the thing i think there's a there's a faction of of the world that we work and live in that would want you to spend that money and there's plenty of people that we know who have spent that money and benefited from it 100 that's okay but don't

pretend like this is this is an elevated version of the art form just tell me what the fuck happened they spent the money you didn't so go crazy well because they're embarrassed they're embarrassed that they had to pay for a publicist but in

he's embarrassed about paying for a publicist though the people who can afford to pay for a publicist it's like having a manager or an agent for them it's just like a part of the team and if you and I think you we're we're repped right like i i think there's people who don't have reps who are saying the same shit about people like you and i and all of us like it's it's they're sitting

there like if he didn't have an agent he wouldn't be shit he wouldn't have shit and maybe that's true i truly don't know but what i do know is at least with stand-up you gotta we all gotta follow each other we i go you go right and one way or the other we get to see what the shit looks like lie versus whatever the internet has told us it's meant to be well that's the thing too about these like vine instagram youtube tiktok people is when they get a certain amount of followers their reps tell them to do stand-up because they know that they can sell out a weekend in the city or in atlanta or blah blah blah wherever and people show up to see them perform but at these comedy clubs the thing that i keep hearing is that they find out real real quick that their funny

a person that they follow their social media star is not funny in real life it was a different funny so these people who pay to see you that one time they're not coming back the next time you come back to their city but you've already sold out three dates yeah and and frankly that's the challenge right is that the now with social media all you got to do is say the shit sold out you keep selling out it's not a question of the quality of the experience and that just makes it all complicated and messy but well i want to be honest that i'm going to hate on uh this generation that because if we want to hate uh they don't actually know what fucking is good or not like just period like I I remember like listening to albums and I was like oh they really had a band

they're playing these instruments while they're singing they had there's no there was no real studio voice it was like either you can sing or you cannot sing and so now everything is generated everything can be filtered and put a spin on it and you're like now we can sell it and that's what people want to hear anyway they don't want to hear the old school r&b they're like that's old that's sad it's like no that was people actually putting in the work in their field and that's why to your point that's why i don't run from the title of hater that's why i'm not scared of it is because i think personally i believe that we need to bring hating back i think they're this a certain generation hit i wouldn't even say it's this generation but probably the generation before

where they shamed people for having uh outspoken opinions about like some shit that they didn't care for for stuff that's trash and then it became like okay well we'll just let everything exist and run wild and now we have a bunch of people who are are both exceptional and awful living in the exact same spaces and that's crazy exceptional and awful and everybody both exceptional and awful is making money and they're posting on Instagram that they just bought a house and it's like but

it was like an influx this past year of people who you're like what do you do and they're like I just bought my first house I'm 24 right and it's like is everybody is everybody on line 24

everybody nobody's 27 everybody's 12 we didn't have the same access like i i mean what did i have a dial up aim like that's about it you know remember those for you i never got one ipod nano i was never so lucky and you know good good for them that's great that's great for them but then that's i feel bad for the generation after this because then they're gonna have to hear all this awful music well all All the music is not bad, Sidney.

A lot of it, but all of it is not bad. It's some bops. Yeah, I'm not going to say I hate it. I don't like the Dula Peep. Dula Leeper? Dula Leeper? I don't like it. I don't like it.

Yeah, I'm like, they make it. She's so good. And I'm like, I saw her perform, and I was like, they don't need to have her on stage. Where did you see her perform? She could take some. She was on Saturday Night Live. No, I didn't see that, but I did listen.

She was on Saturday. She's performed everywhere. I'm like, I don't need to see that. I listened to Dua Lipa like a couple weeks ago for the first time, and I was like, this is a'ight. I had a completely different reaction than you, friend. I said, pretty, please. I said, I'm here for this.

It's a'ight. I didn't say it was bad. Yeah, you were. Well, I don't think it's as hype as it should be. i think she's a very thin a very thin girl that's very marketable and that's why she is and i i think that that has always existed right we've always yes we've always in in music and art and all these things been competing with somebody's uh attractiveness versus skill that's a conversation that's as old as time but i do think that there were at least was a period where we were comfortable

being like I don't know that ain't shit but go crazy like enjoy your your thing if that's what you want and then we reached this period where it wasn't safe anymore to be like that ain't shit and and I think we got to bring that back we got to we got to come back but you know what it is it's fan it's stan culture stan culture is what makes people afraid to say what they do or don't like because especially if the person is famous enough like Nicki Minaj has Nicki Minaj has the barbs and that's a that's a level of crazy that you're like wait what and they're sick people right but then beyonce has what's beyonce people called the hive the hive the hive is top tier will like destroy your life find your pastor's email right post a picture of you from 1998

where you didn't have no teeth like the hive is next level disrespectful yes carrie hilson has not had a career since. I don't even know when has she made a song. She came out as an anti-vaxxer this year and I think that sort of made it a little more complicated. To that point, maybe Carrie Hilson

doesn't find herself as an anti-vaxxer if we just hear her out when she started making fun of Beyonce the first time. But did she make fun of Beyonce or what did she say? We don't even know. She might have been like, oh I heard this song.

she might have said i heard it but i didn't really like it and people were like what did you and it's like not all beyonce songs i'm going on record saying this not all beyonce songs are good songs she's in a fair she's oh everything doesn't have to be good but like oh it's the overall it's the overall like oh yeah i fucks with beyonce like yes and i think you'd be an unreasonable i i think and i that's where i draw the line right is it would be unreasonable for me to come on this podcast and be like fuck beyonce she ain't that's the soundbite it's clearly that's the sound right there there we go that's where we're gonna replay everywhere yeah hey uh beyonce can suck my dick oh huh soundbite number two no no we will we will be thank you we're sending that to

the point is that's an unreasonable position she's obviously one of the most talented people in her industry there is right in that little like space of people who do what she does she's the best at it right that said she ain't for me you know what i'm saying like there's a bunch of times where i'm like i don't give a fuck about whatever this shit that my wife and everybody i know is going crazy for it ain't for me right but i ain't mad at it and i certainly have to respect the talent in it whereas there are other people who we don't have to respect the talent in nor should we but we keep being told we need to and that to me is dangerous and problematic and speaks to the stand culture that you're talking about of just wanting to obsess over something instead of

be honest about what it actually provides for us i think it's interesting that you quoted r kelly earlier and now you're saying that yeah yeah thank you bring it back i'm a man who makes subtle no but he's he's sick and i come from chicago and we spent years obsessing over him i literally knew the girl he peed on and i still didn't have an understanding of what sexual assault was because the community around me is telling me that's not the same dangerous person that the pervert down the street is and it is it's just a more powerful pervert did you go to school with the girl who got peed on or she was like yes that that is correct she uh he used to come to our uh our uh games to pick her up she was a cheerleader you know you're but you're not the first person

to tell us this i feel like everyone that i know from chicago has has an r kelly r kelly to the high school story no he went to a lot of high schools let's not get it twisted it's not like she was special when he peed on her she was one of many girls that he was sexually assaulting right uh she just happened to be the one that broke the case open right the p that broke the camel's back if you will yes right and who would have thought camel's backs could be broken by p but they sure can so langston are you are you listening to r kelly when it comes on or are you turning it off that's yeah i don't i don't i don't need those bad feelings i'm not about to be that guy who like advocates for listening to r kelly i will say that i'm not fighting i everybody

wants me to be mad at michael and i can't do it i don't know michael jackson i can't do well that's because he died we died we so we can't really get the case yeah but i if i'm being honest i don't think that the motherfucker was innocent i i truly don't believe that like those boys are just completely making up the story i don't know that i believe that it went to the extent that they've uh they've gone to but i do think that any time an adult man is having any level of intimacy with little white boys there's a problem there it's so good he was this is before wait a minute little michael ain't never heard nobody right little little michael i'll fight for little michael all day little michael was hurt he was hurt yes so we so we

can listen to little michael and the jackson five no i'm still listening do you do you remember the time jackson when it comes on the shuffle so but r kelly is blocked from being played on my phone and i don't do no i don't do no aura no robert chris brown to stay away from breezy as much as possible that being said no guidance was a bop it wasn't it was the one with uh buster rhymes that was a pretty good one oh that was i don't see how you can hate from outside the club you can't even get in that one there you go that's a good one yeah i mean listen i think if you have a platform right i think you could use your hating in a in a good way i think the things that you don't like you just don't mention it because when

you're mentioning it you're giving it more traction so i think if you're a smart hater you would hate in your group texts and then only promote the stuff that you actually like on and that's something i wholeheartedly believe i think you're putting it in a better way than i put it earlier i think that the best thing i can do is just remain silent on the things that that give me pause because more more often than not the second i go i don't fuck with this thing at least 30 people are going to gravitate towards it if for no other reason than what you were sang maria being oppositional or at least being curious about the shit that i hated on yeah yeah damn i had like a i was i had something i was gonna add to that and then i forgot what it was

oh oh langston sorry before i lose it hate yeah he is what brought down bill cosby okay because he was hating on a specific community and then hannibal said instead of telling people to pull they pants up bill you should be you should stop pulling people's pants down and then a whole thing opened up and look at bill cosby in prison now with his with his glossy eyes he he built a an empire uh in his latter life later life on on being unkind to poor black people that was his whole brand was just i've read the fucking transcripts for what they call the pound cake speech that's the the speech where he he was basically going on those long rants about you know uh black kids pulling up their pants and all the the terrible mothers who were raising them

and it's just a mean mean person who clearly doesn't feel any connection to anybody under a certain like economic level and that's fucking crazy and yeah you deserve to get you know your dick slapped in prison or whatever it is that's happening to him we don't know but and we don't care but he deserves everything that's happening to him and like but like how dare you be hating on that when you when you got so much worse

in your closet yeah why are you worried about my pants sir where the quaaludes at let's talk about that and to that point that's something I also try to do is like if I'm gonna hate on some shit I want to at least believe that I'm not putting out some like equally problematic

version of that thing most of the stuff I hate I feel like i at least can uh i can do better or i am doing better on something and i try to leave some shit that like i can't do alone so even with like the tiktok dances i don't get mad at motherfuckers getting rich off of tiktok dances because i ain't gonna do it and i don't know how like i truly don't it's a lot of this and like clapping ish you gotta shimmy clap yeah it's all in the arms it's all the arms it's less about the it's less about it's actually not even really about the rhythm at all it's just like maybe you know it's never and there's a slide what

which is which is fine we're not going to be mad at that uh oh oh you know what uh people were upset about that i i would like to hear your uh take on uh kevin hart they were they were dragging his special they were saying it's bad it is then he thought oh it's a terrible special shame on you kevin but also i don't know well it hold on hold on so then they went into clubhouse and they were dragging it and then he got in the room and was trying to defend it's special on club but and this is where it gets real sick for old uh kevin because he part of the reason he went on clubhouse is because he's an investor in clubhouse and it was like a weird cross promotion pollination type thing of getting

people to be attracted to the thing it's a it's a coy game that he's playing with us but at the end of the day it was just a dude who put out garbage and he knew he put out garbage but he also like felt like he needed to have something because his ego is built the way his ego is built i don't know what to do there's no healing right like i'm not gonna offer up anything that makes kevin better but also nigga you know what that special was doing relax it was i fell asleep i put it on and i was like wait he's in his house yeah and i woke up and netflix was like you still watching and i was like no and i just shut my laptop i'm not watching this no more i watched every minute of it um you okay well and i'll say this i watch between all the rooms that you're

every special that comes out and i have opinions on every single one even people who i don't care for from the beginning of watching it well i think we need to do a patreon episode of this i think people need to pay 20 no 50 if they want to hear what you really can go down the list if we if this is a paywall situation we can i could tell you without the wall being up how you feel about andrew schultz special because that's a comic that people keep bringing up when i talk it was terrible i think we can all agree that that also was not i haven't i didn't watch it isn't it like a bunch of things it was 15 minutes it's four 15 minute specials it's 60 minutes total but it's it's his take on four different things most of it is just him making weird jeffrey

Epstein puns and like sort of scolding people for being human. I don't know. It's not great. But that said, I take a lot of issue. I think my larger issue with a lot of that is there's something really yucky about this brand of white boy who sort of appropriates black culture without giving any credit to any of like black culture. It doesn't feel that far from the Jake Paul of it all for me where it's like alright motherfucker are we being black or not like just be honest about where the fuck you got this from because nigga

you don't talk like that around your family I'm a hundred percent sure that ain't your family voice that's not your talking to the IRS voice that's not your talking to the accountant voice that's not getting pulled over voice that's not how you talk at Thanksgiving what up fam like

get the fuck out of here you don't talk like that and nor do I I don't know he's been like he's on on guy code he i mean he's been talking like this for a long like yeah but you know he's been with charlamagne forever so like but you know who else damn i keep you'll get no fight out of me i agree yeah he put him on and that's that's enough bullshit to me to to even begin the conversation yeah amongst other things that he did mean things to black women for years before he woke up and decided to rebrand himself damn langston we gotta get this page started i really

want to know some bridges i don't give a fuck i really feel like you would give us the content i really wish you would have burned some bridges today but i don't know how to do that you know we're not gonna we're not gonna keep you for much longer um do you have some tips on how to hate properly do you have some some tips on how to get over being a hater anything i think a nice way to hate uh thank you for asking i think a nice way to hate is to uh is to post without context to your group chat just post the thing allow the responses to flow and uh build your your uh your full perspective from that so something you don't find uh to be yummy and as you you see it you give it to your group your small little circle you let them say what they got to say and then once you've

had a finished sort of perspective on it that's when you unleash the full round of hateration exactly i actually enjoyed it okay i didn't think it was that bad yep i didn't like it too much and then you're like you pounce yes then you go off okay i like that that's a good tip and that way you don't ever feel like oh this is just coming from an unfinished place you get a full finished perspective and then you throw it in okay so is there any is there such thing as hate redemption yeah hater i hate it like you didn't like something for x amount of time and then you one day you like oh wait i'll kind of get it now and i yes i think i think that that you should have the right to not like something to hate on something but also be able to give it the space

if you're a human enough person we all change we all grow we're all evolving at all times and there's space for you to be a person who goes i didn't like that at first or i used to not like whatever this person was putting out but now i do i used to fuck with kevin hart super hard and now i don't but that doesn't mean that he might not put out something where i go man he found it again and that's okay but right now that special stinks and that's fine i mean okay so you can hate something and then if there's something they do make something good you could be like hey hey just because I hate them doesn't mean I can't acknowledge that that was pretty

good. I don't think that Langston was saying he hates Kevin Hart. I think he's saying he hates the special. No, no, no. I'm just saying. Yes, but I think to both of those questions, yes, you can not like someone. You can not like the product. But if you are an honest human being,

you also should be able to acknowledge that we evolve and change and grow. So maybe you feel differently five minutes from now or ten years from now. Who knows? Wow. Wow. Langston, thank you for helping us evolve and change and grow tonight. Yeah. OK, I want one last thing. I instead of we're going to flip the hating and we're going to do some like uplifting.

Langston, say I would like you to go around the room and just say a few positive things about each of the people on the Zoom to to to close this out. Hell yeah. You know, I love that. first of all, Andrew, those lights are spectacular. As soon as I got on, I said, those are beautiful lights. And I wish I had the, the audacity to, to hang lights in the room that I'm in, but this is a mostly empty room that I'm allowed to work in, but because my wife doesn't respect me anyway, love your lights. And you've been very patient and you're a good producer. As far as I can tell, who knows if you can edit, but a goddamn hero. as far as i can tell oh my god thank you it's hard to compete with their life they all have

those sex lights as they call them so hey we all have sex in different colors and so you're having sex in uh and white christmas and they're having sex in different christmases alternative christmases okay marie uh i listen you you you you nailed it with that peach cobbler goddamn was that a funny ass joke fucking a pie and it's called a black man fucking a pie and it's called peach cobbler that's goddamn funny and i'm glad you had that all that wine because you're loose i love it i'm forgetting all the questions that i want to ask but i'm gonna have more uh thank you langston okay and now sydney sydney oh sydney i text you on your birthday and you didn't reply but i forgive you for that. But more importantly, Sydney, your hair looks beautiful. You're glowing in your pink

light. You look fantastic. And you brought in some very important counter perspectives to some of the things that I was saying that helped me sharpen my perspective on hate. And I appreciated that this evening. Langston, I'm going to say a positive thing about you and then you can go. okay or and then we'll wrap this up oh sure you went all the way around and didn't mention salmon teriyaki not one time i think you did a phenomenal job tonight babe thank you no it was a it was a tight rope and boy was i was hanging over spikes on one side and ice crystals on the other man i managed it i figured it out he saw my face i was like i dare you i dare you i was like i gotta say something snot like a little you know a little comment i'll talk about

her birthday i'll bring up the fact that she'll reply to text messages but i'm not gonna bring up that cemetery that's that's difficult you are awesome thank you friend tell people who are listening where they can catch you where they can see you you know everything that you got going okay yeah uh you can catch me online at langston kerman on all the platforms l-a-n-g-s-t-o-n-k-e-r-m-a-n i don't know why i spelled it for you you've figured it out it's pretty funny langston um kerman yeah oh people don't listen well i i've been called leslie far too many times to put faith in the human ear um and oh and please go listen to my podcast uh it's called my mama told me and we talk about uh black people and their conspiracy theories and the uh the cool

sort of like uh uh not q anon of of the world around us all the the anti-q anon if you will on my podcast which is real fun it is fun um beautiful thanks so much langston sydney any final words andrew final words langston you've been so consistent i mean ever since i've met you seven years ago you've been uh stunning hilarious and and and and yeah i've never seen you i've never seen you unemployed and broke and i love that and uh i'll make sure to text you back man i'll even i'll even okay i'm not fighting that yeah i'll take a facetime here and there marie you're gonna facetime me any facetimes coming your way uh you didn't text me on my birthday oh that's true i don't think i have your number as i was saying i was like i don't think i

have it either yeah i was like he definitely doesn't have your number and i'm gonna text you on your birthday too in september andrew no deal you'll get no text message from me on your birthday okay sorry I don't get a text from them either so it's all good what Andrew we didn't text you in October on your birthday yes because my birthday is in November yeah

that means we did we surely did text you you were a get damn liar I definitely text you honey we'll check the receipts I'm gonna check the receipts too bitch okay alright yeah um well thank you for listening to this once again chaotic episode with

everybody on the call being sexy as fuck you know what to do leave a review rate subscribe do all those things make sure you're following in us follow us on all of our platforms and yeah yes have a fabulous rest of the week or

whatever the hell the end of that sentence was supposed to be anyway bye guys bye forever dog this has been a forever dog production the unofficial expert is executive

produced by Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. Senior producer, Tracy Sorin. Produced by Andrew McGuire. Cover art by Sandy Honig. To listen to this podcast ad-free, sign up for Forever Dog Plus at foreverdogpodcasts.com slash plus. Check out video clips of our podcasts on youtube at youtube.com slash forever dog team and make sure to follow us on twitter instagram and facebook at forever dog team to keep up with all the latest forever dog news