MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - "The Mercury in Retrograde Expert" with Glory Mora

Episode Date: November 8, 2019

We have the Legendary Comedian herself, Glory Mora, in the studio this week as our Mercury in Retrograde expert! Glory tells us what our zodiac signs say about us, that time she went on a Tinder date to Morocco, and whether she's in retrograde every day of the month. Plus, Marie and Sydnee tell us about some "hairy" situations they got into.----Listen to The Unofficial Expert Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus:https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus----BONUS EPISODES AVAILABLE NOW ON PATREON:www.patreon.com/TheUnofficialExpertBUY UNOFFICIAL EXPERT MERCH:https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-unofficial-expert-podcastFOLLOW THE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT:https://www.instagram.com/UnofficialExpertFOLLOW SYDNEE:https://www.instagram.com/JustSYDbwhttps://twitter.com/justsydnycFOLLOW MARIE:https://www.instagram.com/Reeezyhttps://twitter.com/MsReeezyFOLLOW ANDREW:https://www.instagram.com/mcgui_guyTHE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT IS A FOREVER DOG PODCASThttps://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/the-unofficial-expertSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

hi guys wow wow what's up guys oh my gosh we're here we're there we're everywhere we're making it work um you know still still doing ratchet things taking her braids out yeah in the studio we recorded two episodes still not finished and black people she didn't bring a plastic bag for and she's just throwing them on the floor. Yeah. And Andrew is shocked. Somebody will sweep this up.

I'm kidding. I wonder who that would be. Somebody will clean this up. Somebody. He's got 911. Yes. Marie, you know, this new hairstyle of yours, it's like, first of all, you could do no wrong.

No wrong. No, I did wrong. No. I had done wrong. You have the face for everything. And I'm not just saying this as a friend who doesn't want to have sex with you. I'm saying it as a friend that does want to have sex with me. Wow.

Cool. Great. No. So I woke up a couple days ago or I woke up the other day and I was like, oh, I'm going to dye my hair today. I had no plan, no appointment, no reference photos. I just was like, I'm going to dye it today. You need a photo, bitch.

Okay. So I went on. I was like, well, how much is it going to cost? And I was like, like $90. I was like, I'm going to just do it myself. I don't have any hair. Oh my God, Marie. So I watched some YouTube tutorials and I was like, it looks like a lot of products.

I was like, let me go outside and see what these people say. And I went to a bunch of different hair salons. They were giving me different prices. They were like, oh, it depends on how many processes. It's going to cost more. And I went to Duane Reade to go get products to do it myself. And as I was walking to Duane Reade, walked by a salon and I just walked in. And the dude was, it was like a Jamaican hairdresser.

And he was like, what do you want, gal? Or whatever. And I was like, I want to bleach my hair. And he was like, I got you. I was like how much he was like 90 and he's like

but I'll cut it for you he's like I'll make it look good he's like you're gonna look hot so you walk by he had nobody in the chair someone was in the chair oh he was doing somebody's hair

he was doing someone's hair and someone was waiting for him to do their hair and I was like well when can you do it he was like you can do it today and I was like

I did wake up today and say I was gonna do it today I had been posting about it in my stories I was like I guess I'll do it today he was like come back in an hour

an hour he was like take your time so I walked back to my house And I was there for an hour and a half. And he called me and was like, you coming back? And I was like, yeah, I'm outside. I'm on my way. And I went and he dyed it.

And it took two processes. But it was, like, not as light as we wanted it. It was, like, a silverish purple color. And he's like, come back this week. He was like, I'll get it lighter. No charge. And so I went back two days ago. And it was white.

Like, sheet of paper white. And I was like, yes, it's too light. But I like it. I was like, it's too long. And he was like, no, it's not. It's good. He like tried to like wave it. And I was like, it was too much.

So I went to the barbershop last night and I had them cut it. And now I like it because it was my it was too long. Your hair journey is just incredible. I'm spending so much money and I'll have no hair. It's like, yeah, that's the bizarre thing. Woo. It's like, why is tax write off? Why is it so much money to just like dye hair?

I don't know. I'm I'm like, sir, I ain't got no hair. Like, I'm a young man trying to save my money. Like, what's happening? But I didn't tell my mother. I haven't told my mom that I dyed it yet. And I know she's going to be tired. She's going to be furious.

Why? Because she's still mad that I cut it. And she's going to be even madder that I dyed it. And I dyed it this color. It's fucking hair. You could dye it back. I know. But she's like, when you come in to see the bathroom,

because she just renovated the bathroom, when you come in to see it, I was like, ah, I still haven't told her about this hair. So I'm going to catch you on Thanksgiving. Just wear a fucking hat. I told her I'm going to catch her on Thanksgiving. Wear a scully. No, but my mother's the type to snatch a hat off somebody's head.

Get a wig. Get a lace front. Can I borrow yours? Speaking of lace fronts, I'm an expert in saying yes, yes, yes, yes, yes to anything and everything. Yes. You know, some people want to collab because I'm an influencer. Okay, yeah. Blue check verified.

And I was like, sure, yeah, of course. And that voice? Yes, of course. I was on the phone. I was like, how cool. So after the podcast, I'm getting a lace front

and I have to be on video getting my hair did. Never done that before. I'm not a YouTube person. You're going to be like Heidi Klum in her Halloween costume. She like, went like live or whatever.

Yeah, but my angle is just like, free wig. No. Actually. Do you know your friend? Well, you do. It's 10 p.m. Do you know your friend well?

Yes, I do. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. That's merch. Anyway, so I'm going to do that, but it's got to be kind of funny. So my angle is just people treat you differently when your hair is done. So I'm going to like go in the bodega. He's going to make me pay for stuff. I'm going to be in the street.

People are going to be bumping me, like not even caring. Oh, it's a whole production. Yes, they have people coming in like with cameras and whatnot. That's a script? No script. Off book. Off book. off the dome off the dome honey improv so did you get to pick the wig out i picked the hair

and they're gonna make they're gonna do it okay well what kind of hair how many inches tell us how many bundles i don't know i should have asked you i didn't ask amina or nothing is it straight is it wavy what are we talking about it's like brazilian wavy kind of like you know a little gabrielle you okay a little gap okay little clovers yeah how many inches though uh i think like 25 25 okay beyonce okay single ladies 25 i got a front closure so that should be you're gonna do a middle part i think i'm gonna do a little song i think i'm gonna i think i'm gonna get a little alia your love is one in a million four page letter like i'm that's not the melody you that song i'm writing you a four-page letter and i enclosed it with the kids there yeah so i'm

doing that and um it's it's gonna be different because different is good though different is good i i need to branch out and take risks but you know i love braids because it's just easy but your girl is about to have no edges so i have to take a break and our our guest today has edges so So she can't relate to me. Yeah. Yeah. Andrew has edges as well, I guess. I still don't know what edges are.

That's good. You don't have them. That's crazy. That's because she ain't got them, sis. You haven't Googled yet. I just need to stay up to date. Andrew did, however, text me. He Googled the David, the Pastor David Wilson video.

That was disgusting. That we talked about. It was beautiful. He said it was gross. It was so good. With the sound on, it's like, it's so disgusting. I've never even watched it. I wanted to throw up.

Because you don't like hearing women get pleasure Yeah He was going crazy That's how you're supposed to do it That's my type I don't know I didn't approve Sounds very gay of you

Very judgy Very homosexual You are not a good Christian gay over there You're not an ally if you don't let You don't like the noises that he was making Or her He was just making like slobbery noises good which i feel like he's working yeah yes however she was just she was going off like we

were talking about yeah yeah you should go off listen listen if you ever put a burger on the grill and you don't hear a little little sizzle shit ain't working it ain't on so that's when we're doing it that was a mother effing metaphor wow my guy that's what i'm saying yeah if you don't hear none of that shit the oven ain't on but you can't find it on because you said it was on twitter and I looked all over twitter no they took it down

it's all over Pornhub though I mean Andrew you was gonna be there anyway I was there yeah but I mean again watch it again on silent take it as a like oh wow if I was straight I guess I would do that Andrew said he not here for it

well you know what when I see men getting their dick sucked from other men i'm like oh that's hot yeah they're good for them i'm not saying not good for them i just i i thought it was a little vomit cindy when are you watching men get their dick sucked by other men when does that happen at work is that where where are you doing that sit at the house on the bus oh well i got an uber when are you watching this i got a new apartment i do what i want i watch what i want i got wi-fi wi-fi i got wi-fi wi-fi wi-fi wi-fi wi-fi with a t okay well speaking of doing what we want our guest today does what the hell she wants and we love it we love people we stand who stand in

name truth she is a walking brand marketing go off queen queen yeah okay well i mean i wrote her first name down the pronunciation but did not write the last name down so i got it so i'm gonna say the first and you're gonna say the last yeah uh please welcome our mercury retrograde expert whatever the hell that means we're gonna talk about it we're gonna talk about it uh gloraris Maura Maura Thank you Thank you for having me

Glory Maura Glory Maura We did it Am I gonna clap for me? Yay Andrew's not gonna clap Clap clap clap clap clap Andrew's not gonna clap

Cause he don't know What edges are Yeah Okay it's fine He was like I have a mic now And I have to hold it Oh my god

You want me to clap? No he really He really part of the episode Yes Oh he's our Oh he's our Okay Drag

Drag I love it Come for him I like it Glory said she was listening To last week's episode And she was like Who the hell is that Male voice

I thought it was a male though that's very nice because people think that you're not sometimes I'll pick up the phone and they'll think it's my sister they'll be like ma'am no they know that you're a man they just don't know that you're white that's the problem

people are commenting and they're saying I didn't know Andrew was white until this episode who said that people who be lying I know it came across it's reading loud and clear yes very loud

loud and clear y'all been talking about the algorithms or some shit he was talking about how the face is always on top it's so fun

you know what I'm not gonna no go ahead I've been thinking a lot about Instagram lately I'm like they always put pictures that would do well

like at your obituary I don't know like that's really what they're going for and I don't I don't know cause I be putting my flyers

they don't give a fuck oh no no no nobody wants to see a flyer anything that has print in it they're like words why are we reading this but if it's like

you could use it on the news but like you could trick them with the little slide yeah like if you put a photo of your face and then the flyer is the second slide that's what we'll be doing then people will have i like that i'm right yeah maybe y'all are the ex like y'all really are the marketing no but the way that but the way that um instagram works too is like after people have seen that first slide the next time they swipe through the second one

is is there so i'm gonna do that yeah do that influencer hack well do you have any thoughts on what you heard us talking about before we get into your expertise? Today or the last episode? No, today. We're talking about Sidney's 25. It's going to be on your butt? Yeah, 25 inches.

That's sexy. That's very Cher. Yeah. Well, I want to see it first. Okay. Because I got to see it first, Sidney. Because not all Brazilian hair is created equal.

It's not. Remember they sent me that Brazilian... Oh, we did, sis. That puby-ass wig? Yeah. Wait, what happened? These people sent me some hair to review on my YouTube page

and it was like, Brazilian? Did you like it? No. Oh my God. And the thing is, is that they must have never seen Marie

actually get into it on YouTube because they, oh, the bitch. It was the funniest video. You need to post that on your Instagram.

It was so good. I had the wig tied under my chin and I was like, it looks like pubes. And then she took it off and she's like, ah,

I look better now. Yeah. Ripped the wig off. Yeah, you know, not all wigs are created equal. That's what I'm saying.

I do a lot of wigs a lot of people don't know I wear my wigs when I'm on stage my curly wig it's a half wig some bitches be knowing Tini said I peep

I spook I spook too some people really think that's all me you know are they bitch no some of them

some of them are they're black right cause I used to wear half wigs the half wig is a trick they don't know like you do the first three curls and then you put the wig on

your whole shit is fucked up life changing yeah be ready for set you know ready for set ready for set but ready for sex

are you doing a half wig in set with sex no I I feel like you gotta do it all well I had sex one time this year but I don't like I haven't really

oh you celibate bitch word good for you me too high five you not having sex no that's a lie

I'm not you not having sex all year Sydney I'm no well I just want to clarify I had sex one time this year jeez but before that

I was celibate you not fucking Sydney is a get down I'm not I am not having sex I don't know she must be

mixing me and her life I'm not having sex either so I haven't had sex all year Andrew you having sex? I'm having sex Andrew is having sex Andrew is actually lying he makes these stories up so that he can get on the podcast

I like that but I'm not really fucking like that I've been really busy working well that's first of all can you tell us a little bit about you where you from who you is I'm happy you asked that because a lot of people don't know. So I was born, I'm from New York.

I live between Harlem and Washington Heights. But like the Dominicans, like they also be kind of racist to Dominicans. So that's why I've always been like in the black culture. Tell me what block you live in. I'm 153rd Street. 153rd. That's Washington Heights. Washington Heights starts on 155th, Sydney.

I'm sorry, you're Washington Heights, honey. Well, Harlem ends when? Where? Harlem ends on 145th, if you ask me. 145th? 145th and Convent. I claim in the middle. I've always been in the middle

I'm a Gemini I don't give a fuck I've been in the middle And that's where I'ma be I don't know Oh so you're Afro-Latina I am I am Afro-Latina

You couldn't tell by the edges Leave me alone They're not even laid But they don't need to be laid I don't believe in laid edges I'm just saying I believe in it They don't get laid

I don't like I'm not one of these people That like has ever been Into like a smooth Now when I get the budget Ooh they gonna be curly and shit You'll get a toothbrush budget Yeah

No no no The budget for the better gel The Eco isn't doing that I thought Eco was supposed To be the good gel stay down like that yeah you're definitely afro-latina i could just you know who do you foresee you for i i have a no no it's a 4a it's 3c 4a there's a lot of textures going on i had to get it blown out because i did a photo shoot yesterday okay plug plug plug it yeah um i wrote

the card so a lot of people don't know black card revoked do y'all know black card yeah i do yeah so they hired it's like cards for all people like it's like um what's that other game of the other I'm trying to remember. Cards Against Humanity. It's like a game. If you don't know cultural references in the black community, you get a black card revoked. So they hit me up to write Latino card revoked. But I let them know I'm an Afro-Latina.

So it's not going to be like the white Latino cards. They wouldn't have expected that. The white Latino cards. Woo! The Jenny from the block cards. Because there are a lot of white Latinos and people don't understand that. No, we kidding. People don't understand that there's black Latinos.

That's the difference. So I had to be able to write those cards so there'd be representation. And so you did it. I did. I just submitted them last week. We had a photo shoot yesterday and they're going to come out in November. Well, talk to us a little. Like, give us maybe like an example or two of what some of the cards are.

So one of the cards, I put a Selena question in there. Okay. Very important. That's the most important. You know, but I also added some free, like I'm a nerd. So I added some Frida Kahlo questions. I also wrote about like, if you're writing a novella, how would you turn it up? Yes.

So I put like, you kidnap somebody, you slap somebody. you cry in Spanish just a bunch of shit Celia Cruz I hope you had a Celia Cruz in there yes we do you cannot be

Afro-Latina without that one of the questions like what's her real name ah work oh it wasn't Celia Cruz damn well what was her real name it's Usola

some long thing Usola that's why she changed it got it well yeah cause she was trying to you know break into the mainstream

but I put and I put Jharrel Jerome in there too cause you know the white Latinos would've missed that yeah Moonlight hun

but yeah so I wrote that I'm actually it's weird because like the projects that mean more like I don't really put them out like that

because they're special to me everything else I don't know like you know I be on the internet all the time like oh I'm doing this I'm doing that

you know building up the brand but like this was really special and I just want to when the articles come out that's when you drive it when it's real and the photo shoot photos is ready

the press photos well actually I was right I was doing something so yeah I don't know I'm just I don't know no it's fine

so you're a Gemini what does that mean that means because in my mind you crazy you know it's funny I don't get along with Geminis what's your sign? I'm a Scorpio

that's why we don't get that's why we don't get along that's why we don't get along tell us what a Scorpio's traits are and we'll see if that's true well I don't want to fuck up the podcast no no no go ahead tell us what Scorpio's traits are Scorpio's are manipulative

they're dark he's so pale I meant dark inside baby but he's the nicest person I know I don't feel the dark energy. Well, you maybe have, like, rising and moon energy. Okay. Yeah.

Rising and moon. Look at how dark his eyes are. If you look into them, they dark. Because they, like, sunken in a little bit. Sis, you one of them scam artists. You make it work no matter what. Okay, got it. This is Ms. Cleo.

Call me now. Yeah, we got you. Afro-Latina, call me now. But I did, it's interesting, because I was like, you know, you ladies are both air signs. Libra, you know. Libra is a scale. I didn't know that was an air sign. No, no, yeah, yeah.

You know, air sign, a lot of ideas. Aquarius, go with the flow. Because we're talking about Mercury retrograde. Yes, please talk about it. So Sydney's in Aquarius. Yes. Which I did not know. I thought you were Pisces.

Wait, why would you? Don't worry. I don't know. Because I don't know nothing about the sun. I'm saving friendships. Okay, cool. I just thought February. But you guys are compatible friends.

Are we? Like you guys are like ideal partnership friends. Friends. I think it's because we're attractive. If I was ugly, Marie would- If she was ugly, it doesn't matter what sign she was. And if I was ugly, it doesn't matter what sign I was either. That's a lie.

Because you know I make friends with everyone. So stop it. some of my best friends are ugly yeah that's not me but that's Sidney I was like wow

oh okay I don't think I have any ugly friends I only have four friends and they're all pretty cute yeah they're really hot you said you don't have any ugly friends

I don't think I do all them bitches is cute good for you I picked them cute so who takes the photos when y'all go out we got like a stranger she gets a photographer

she has she always has a photographer I have a whole production team baby maybe they have videos and photos content

nah like we haven't done like a group shit in a long time them bitches you know they're cute but they be boring oh

that's a lie you got some dynamic ass friends vibrant friendships are we talking about comedy friends or real life friends no I'm talking about

your actual friends okay yeah my actual friends yeah they're cute like they're cute yeah I know all my comedy friends are cute but my real friends

I love how honest you are no I mean this is true we're not gonna get into that okay well yesterday I was annoyed

I don't wanna I'ma feed into that energy you was annoyed with them yesterday no it was just I don't wanna talk about it Let's talk about Mercury retrograde. Okay, we'll save it for the Patreon.

We'll have you on the Patreon and you'll talk about it there. The tea, the tea, yeah. But, you know, Mercury retrograde has been a big part of my life, you know? What does it mean? Yes, please. We don't get it. So Mercury is a planet that rules. I feel like a nerd.

No, no, no. We need it. Please. Break it down exactly like that. Mercury is a planet that rules communication and technology and all that shit. And it orbits around the sun really fast, right? So when Mercury is in retrograde, my phone is not working properly? But it's just random shit.

No, we gonna be off. Like, we could be doing well, and then Myrtle Girl comes in, and then we'll have, like, a tiff. Yeah, a lot of arguments. Like, you have random arguments with your friends. Like, you're kind of feeling a little depressed. But that could be an all-year kind of thing. But if you're like a Virgo Gemini, you get really depressed. You start to really think about your life.

And, like, this shit goes wrong. I would say the trains don't really work that well, but we're in New York City. The trains don't never work. I know, I know. I feel like everything you're saying could be any day of the week. So, at first, people think that. But when you start paying attention to the patterns, you're like, yo, Mercury's in retrograde. Okay.

Give me the patterns. What are the patterns? I just told you, like, your phone might be fucked up. Your phone not fucked up? Well, I don't pay my bill on time, so. I just did the update, and it's acting up. Is it in retrograde right now? It started on Halloween.

But I updated like a week ago. Well, look, there's a shadow phase as well. I know y'all bitches don't believe me. I'm telling y'all this is real. No, no, no, no. Keep going. I'm listening. I'm taking it in.

People who are listening do believe in this. Yes, they do. And then Mercury's in retrograde right now in Scorpio. So it's a really big time to really reflect on your deep relationships, to let go of some dark shit, some bad habits. And if you have some shallow relationships, all them hoes is going. Shallow. Oh, okay.

She's saying Mercury in retrograde is in Scorpio? It is right now. So what does that mean? So Scorpios are feeling it the most? Well, fixed signs. So if you have fixed signs. So someone like Sydney, Aquarius is a fixed sign. Aquarius, Taurus, Scorpio, those are people that are going to feel the impact of it.

Gemini and Virgo always feel it because that's our ruling planet. so like everybody's pissing me off right now right but i'm always kind of like oh i just thought it was because i had an attitude problem because you know i'm a libra virgo cusp you a virgo cusp oh that might be it too you know i don't know i'm feeling like fine lately now today but it happens for three weeks for three but i've been feeling like fine like i haven't like been depressed and you said he is thriving i'm thriving right now so is this adding up what do you mean and you look like he don't believe none of this it's like is the math don't check out y'all really you don't believe in this shit?

No, no, no, no, no. I believe in it, but I just, I need more facts. I just want you to explain what it is. It's just the planet looks like it's going backwards.

Okay. So retrograde means Mercury is going backwards. It looks like it's going backwards three times a year. You know, so just random shit just be happening

and life doesn't make sense. But life never makes sense. No, no, no. But it just makes more sense. So you're not going through anything in your life that doesn't make sense.

Well, I am. A lot of changes happened in the last couple of days. Okay, so what? And I'm also haven't been having really good communication skills. Didn't I just say all that shit? I thought that. No, you did.

You did say that. But I didn't explain it that well because communication. But I've also gotten on Zoloft, but I think that maybe the retrograde was like, bitch, you need to get on it quick. And then my shit started going backwards. Who are you having issues with? I just think that anybody that I'm attracted to, I just don't know how to talk to them correctly.

Like in relationship wise? In relationships, yeah. Or maybe you guys are just not compatible. You're probably not the problem, Sydney See, now you sound like a friend And not somebody who knows me What do you mean? Oh, you might be the issue?

I don't know I think I'm the issue How do you talk to people? Well, I am a people pleaser Okay So I don't want Really? Yeah, I don't want to

I hate confrontation It's annoying That's some Libra shit But you seem like very confrontational Confrontation is fine with me Yeah, maybe you got soft body But Like, not

I don't look for confrontation I feel like Libra I don't look for it. I usually don't get along with Libras. Well, Marie, you're usually oblivious. You're like, I don't know. Problems? But I think it's less that I'm not,

I don't think that I'm a confrontational person. No, Libras usually aren't. I think that I'm very honest. And if something doesn't work for me, I'll say that it doesn't work. And I'm not looking for trouble. I'm just telling you that this, I don't want to do this,

or I don't want to do you wrong. But you wait till like the last minute. I'm very good at waiting for the last minute. That's some Libra shit. Like, you just wait till the last, like something could have happened a year ago, and then like a year later, Well you know

There's some shit That bothered you But you also got Like a Virgo shit going on But I also I hold grudges Do you Marie Did not know that

That's what I meant You know what I'm not Mercury is a metric I'm not explaining myself But that's what I meant That's what I meant Leave your bitches

Beholding mad grudges Well Marie I didn't know you Hold grudges If somebody does Something to me That I don't like I then don't like

That person But did you say Do you confront it Like hey That shit pissed me off Nah you just It depends it depends on what it is

like if somebody does something to me in the moment and it's somebody that I'm like I have a good enough relationship with I'll call them on it

in the moment but for the most part I'll just decide in my mind that I don't want to that I don't F with somebody no more and then they are no longer my friend

and they don't know that I'll unblock Cindy you might not be friends with Marie right now no I'm kidding no Cindy and I are friends no I'm kidding I hold grudges against people

that I don't like you know what I mean I'm kidding like people who've slighted me or stolen jokes things like that like those are people

that I like oh work okay I'm just saying people like those are the types of grudges that I hold like if a man does something disrespectful to me and I say in the group chat he dead to us then he's dead to us yeah he is do you run away I can't

can I ask you a question about that because I'm going through that right now my little baby comedy career right as y'all know I'm about to be a legend and shit legendary comedian a lot of these comedians like you know you have your real friends right and then you have like your comedy like acquaint I call them colleagues right I don't know yeah you're my colleague

We working in the same industry for a night, right? But if you don't fuck with somebody because they did some shit like that, do you feel like everybody shouldn't fuck with them? Everyone that I'm cool with. That's what I'm saying, right? Yes. Because I felt like somebody betrayed me. They don't know they betrayed me, but I took them notes.

I felt betrayed. You feel like somebody betrayed you because you don't F with somebody no more and they're still cool with that person? They just became cool out of nowhere. It's weird. Yeah. I thought that shit was funny. I don't know.

No, but I'm also the type of friend, if Sidney says, I'm not friends with Bobby no more, then I'm not friends with Bobby no more either. But then if Sidney starts talking to Bobby again, I'm like, sis, Bobby is dead to us. Right. I'm the same kind of person. And then I've already decided that I hate that person because of you. And even if my friend is talking to this, I still can't. She will not acknowledge it.

I can't get back into it with that person. No, I'm in the same way. Yeah, because I don't trust them. Because it's just like, well, you told me all this shit, and now you're like, oh, I'm supposed to be back on board with this person? no way so no flip-flopping with friendships okay but the problem is with comedy right we got the friendship but then there's business right so it's like oh we don't fuck with somebody no more but well let me we might be on a show together or i might have to kind of like do like some

political democratic shit and just oh i gotta put them on just cuz but like but i think there's a difference between like fucking with someone like they know you personally like we're sharing some shit like some feel i'm a gemini so i like to be detached right so if i'm sharing some feeling shit with you you like to be detached i am free i am a little detached are you a gemini am i she's a libra yeah but i like to be determined i feel like we have a lot of comments you know a little maybe you're you're gemini moon or some shit we're gonna do birth chart well how do i do my birth chart we're gonna go on astro cafe and we're gonna do your birth you know what time you were born yeah i asked my mom i saw my birth uh i asked my mom the other day it's like i was born

at 4 10 in the morning i just you know what i don't know why people are not interested in it Like, sometimes people don't care about astrology. No, it is interesting. Like, I feel like there's a lot of men that don't believe in that shit. Well, I think it's entertaining. I just don't think that it's realistic. But we're on a planet floating. Right.

But we're all on a planet floating. That's what I'm saying. When Mercury is in retrograde, all of us are not having a bad, like, you know what I mean? Like, life has ups and downs. But some people take Mercury retrograde really extreme, right? Like, when you first discover it, you're like, you know, you blame everything on it. But it really is about reevaluating your relationships, like your contracts, all that shit, being really organized.

So people like, it has a bad connotation, but when you look at it for like the organizational part of it, you could really get your life together during this part. So you really can. Get your life together. Well, that's why there's changes happening. And I don't like sign, I'm very superstitious. Like I don't sign no contracts during Mercury Retrograde because that shit changes. People will tell you one thing and then it will change.

That's what happened. I was telling you ladies about my job. like I used to work in marketing before I was a legend uh huh a pre-legend yeah yes yes

and um I know everybody be like what the fuck who be here no I love it I love it um I used to work

in marketing I used to work with a lot of white men a lot of white people okay Andrew I wasn't looking yeah

Andrew you work in marketing crazy right you work you work in the agency life oh no I work here

okay I'm saying like oh hold on I'm not trying to get you fired he not hanging out with us sis he's getting paid he's on the clock yeah he's working

yeah nah but like oh he's not a friend he's just no I'm kidding that's hilarious I have a question because you keep on

talking about your your Instagram and everything and when I try to search Glory Mora oh baby I changed the name to legendary comedian

it's legendary comedian it is legendary comedian okay alright interesting he was like oh no one can find you he's about to pull out he's about to pull

some mean receipts on you sis my whole shit is clean baby he's gonna be like the way this outfit looks it must have been in retrograde

right that's shod no shod right okay so you worked with a lot of white men I did I worked with a lot of white people

for eight years they're kind of irritating right eight years eight years I know a lot of people don't know that's why I'm saying

who's Glory I used to work in advertising for eight years okay and I ended up telling one like you don't have a lot

of racist shit that happens you know in the workplace even in comedy like I come into comedy I'm like yeah everyone

can suck my dick right yes oh merch we just said that suck my dick we're gonna get that on jackets

I like that I will be buying one that is so on brand for me suck my dick Right, suck my whole dick. I don't give a fuck. So, yeah, like I was working in advertising and I had a boss, Billy.

I always want to change his name because I don't want to give him credit when I get famous. Call him William. Billy. Billy don't sound like a boss name. Billy is such a good name for a joke. Okay, so Billy. You know? But, yeah, long story short, I used to work on a lung cancer.

Y'all was talking about cancer and shit, the other episode? HPV. What y'all was talking about? You was giving somebody cancer? No. We're talking about HPV. Have you ever had it? No.

Good for you. Did you get a biopsy? Do you know? I just went to the gyno like two weeks ago. Pap smear came back normal. Baby, I be at the gyno all the time.

Like, I'm a hypochondriac. Ah. Yeah. You're like, why you be there all the time? You got good insurance? So when I quit my job, they gave me, like,

one of them... Severance? Yeah, Severance. She sent one of them white people... One of them... You heard of one of them white people packages?

It's called the Severance. It's just the Severance. Lord, what is wrong? Bitch. They trying to be real nice I be over there like So they let you go Well

They let you go Well tell us what happened With Billie Okay In 2018 Was it No 2017 I was on a lung cancer account

Everybody on the account Was dying all the time It was kind of depressing Right Yeah I went to DR for two weeks And I was just I came back like

Yo I don't want to do this Advertising shit no more Right like I'm not trying to look At a computer for the rest Of my life That shit was whack So you know

Bailey think I thought he was an ally Cause he would say Because he wore sneakers to work? No, because he was a white gay man. So I'm like, okay, we're going through things together. Andrew? Is Billy cute?

Is Billy cute? Billy's a hoe. Billy can suck my dick, Andrew. Billy, you, I mean. But y'all would be compatible. He's a Capricorn. Oh, really? Yeah.

I'd be dating people by Zodiac sign. Like, I'm not going to waste my time no more. I'm not. I'm dead ass. Well, what signs are compatible with a Libra? You would do well with a Gemini. An Aries. You really mean an Aries?

An Aries. I don't feel with an Aries. Oh, yeah. That feel aggressive. no no no no Aries feel like they fight no because Libras you guys have a lot of ideas

you never get a comp you never this is true but it's true y'all always have I do have a lot of ideas and you never really commit to them

and you kind of start shit but don't finish it yes that's me sis that sounds like an Aquarius too no but it's an it's an air sign shit but with the Aries

they really put the fire under your ass to get shit done okay well I don't think I know any Aries dudes that's your soulmate okay that's your soulmate

you can thank me later write that down sis she said solmat anyways long story short you got back from DR yeah I came back from DR I was really depressed I was tired

and you know when white people tell you you have an attitude problem at work it's just low key racism cause like why would I have I don't have an attitude you do yeah yeah

I was gonna say I see what they're talking about some people I guess I don't have self awareness some people are like you know you can come off a little sassy sometimes well sassy is racist

well that's racist Okay, sassy's racist, but attitude is not. But attitude not. No, attitude's not, because we know we got attitudes. But saying sassy or feisty, I had a teacher call me feisty once, and I was like, that's right, okay. Well, he told me I had an attitude problem, and I was like, he sent me an email.

That's systematic racism right there. The email? Yes. Wait. We're tired. No, it's okay. It's okay. He sent you an email, and what did it say?

So in the email, he's like, okay, before he sent me the email, we usually have one-on-one meetings. And he's like, yo, before we have, well, he didn't say yo, I just said that. Well, I hate those one-on-one meetings. But he's like, you know, before I come. They smile in your face and then they fire you. Right. That's exactly how they be doing it. They put you on that pit plan.

They be like, hey. Right. This is amazing. Just checking in, you know? Just seeing what's going on. They give you a compliment and then they fire you. And then they give you a compliment when you carrying your crap out. Right.

you know but he used to tell me that he used to pull a tarot card before our meeting so he could see how i would feel thank you andrew oh yeah yeah and i was like okay so we cool we friends like you're an ally so one of somebody was having a little attitude issue i was like oh barely mercury's on retrograde i just said it in passing so he writes this email he's like you know glory like ever since you come back from dr your attitude's been off and i just don't want you to mention mercury retrograde anymore in the office but then like he cc'd like the hr the Like the whole The SVP of HR

And our capability And I was like Why would you put Why would you throw me Under the bus like that That was fucked up So you know It was over Labor Day weekend too

That's supposed to be When you're supposed to be on break Right So I should have really Replied back to the email With my resignation letter But I just went into the office The next day

And he like set me down With everybody I was like you know what Y'all could all suck my dick I don't give a fuck About this job no more Did you say this I said that

But then I didn't realize Until I was doing that That is an attitude problem That's an attitude problem Attitude But I didn't realize I was like yo I'm about to quit my job

I don't have nothing lined up I was like y'all have two weeks to replace me and they was like you don't have to come back no more I was like

yeah but you said you you thought you were going to tell them to suck your dick and then still be there for another two weeks I was like

I didn't realize how deep you're an idiot I know you really didn't need that last paycheck sis you said I don't have an attitude

y'all can all suck my dick that's the way you fire you quit a job I know but it was like but then don't expect to still work there I was half committed to it I was like

don't fire me I gave you the job. Well, what did you wear? What were you wearing when we told them to suck your dick? A turtleneck? Honestly, I had just come from the night before I was sleeping at one of my hoes' house. So you were hungover. So you had on a men's blazer.

I had a Zara blue jean shirt that I wore all the time. Yeah. Zara. Zara. I was at Zara. Zara. Zara's in them. All right, leave me alone.

I was like, I don't know her. Zara? Leave me the fuck alone. Y'all know English is my second language. Okay. It's also mine, sis. And I say Zara. Sis, you sound actually very English.

The most English you've ever sounded was right here. Zara. Zara. It's Zara. No, I'm just going to call it Zara now. So it was a men's shirt from Zara. You say Zara? It's Zara.

It's Zara. Zara. Oh, my God. Zara. I was today years old when I learned that. Today. Oh, my God. Yo.

Do your friends say Zara, too? They know I don't speak good English. I don't give a fuck. Whatever. But you do, though. you speak good enough English to tell people to suck your dick

at work I don't do well I don't do well with name brands or French like it's fine girl I can say Balenciaga

it's not that Balenciaga Balenciaga oh baby you know what no say it again no Balenciaga

sounds like how like my mother would say it yeah Balenciaga okay well great that's how maybe we've been saying it and I don't give a fuck I'ma always say the name wrong

I don't give a fuck I'm being the red carpet I'm wearing fucking Balenciaga suck my dick say that make sure you say suck my dick to the people at E

and I'm gonna be wearing the merch you're gonna be wearing Zara Zara Zara leave me the fuck alone anyways

whatever I told him suck my dick I've been telling him I'm gonna suck my dick ever since 2017 everyone can suck my dick is that the retrograde right there

is that Mercury it was during Mercury retrograde too honestly and if I have a joke like if he would've believed in it

he would've seen it coming that I was gonna tell him suck my dick oh no but he CC'd HR he CC'd everybody And it was just so fake. I just, I don't have time for that.

I don't give a fuck. I didn't see what the big deal was about. Like, what's the problem with saying that? Honestly, I'm, well, it was like the whole year. He was, I was dealing with a lot of shit the whole year. Like, somebody called me a bitch during the meeting. It was a lot. Did they get fired?

No, he was a white man. Girl, why you didn't, did he say why? Honestly, agency life is very, like, they don't have, like, HR is not a real thing. So people will be saying crazy shit to me all the time. And I'm just there, you know, I'm happy to be making money. Right. I need money. So I'm like, a little racism, fine, whatever.

But it was getting to the point where I was like, I can't do this shit no more. You said, I'll get paid with a little bit of racism. Just a little bit. Just a dash. Just a zest. Just a little bit. Racism zest. A Zara of racism.

A Zara. A little bit of Zara. You know, a little bit of Zara racism. But yeah. Wait, so hold on. Sorry. What is the context of this man calling you a bitch in this meeting? Yeah.

Did he say you're acting like a bitch? No. Or did he say, stop being a bitch? No, he's like. Or bitch, come here. Right. No, it wasn't like that. Bitch, your slides ain't ready.

The deck? Yeah. Nah, he just called me, you're a bitch. Like, in front of my reporties, the people that reported to me. It was a lot. Yeah, it was. I don't want to name drop, because I think I signed the NDA or some shit. Did you?

Yeah, I signed my documents. So you were talking about Mercury's in retrograde, and he was like, you a bitch. He was like, bitch, please. Don't nobody care about space. He was like, Pluto ain't even a planet no more. Nah, it was a different white man. It wasn't Billy. This other one was Justin.

Aren't they all kind of the same? Billy, Justin, it's interchangeable beige. Andrew? Billy, Justin, Andrew. Do you have friends named Billy and Justin? No, Billy and Justin, no, absolutely not. Okay. Yeah, no.

Those names are canceled. Canceled. Canceled. Andrew, what's your two best friends' names? Sahara and Isabel. Ah, Sahara and Isabel, yeah. Sahara. I like that.

Where are you from? Originally, I'm from New Jersey, South Jersey. I did not know he was from New Jersey. He sometimes says Zara, too. Okay. I'm going to say that forever I'm going to start saying it too I'm going to message you

and be like how do you say it again say Zara I've been saying that I'm going to say Zara's with an S at the end Zara's that's a cute

name you name your baby Zara's there are some babies named Zara um Corey what do you have any like

good stories about retrograde because I feel like everything is always fucked up what you know this is what's going to happen

I'm going to leave here today I'm like, you know what? She was lying. No, no, no. I don't think you're a liar. No, I know. And then you're going to start seeing this shit in your life. Like, Gloria was right.

I mean, but it also like should be fucked up all the time. So is it always in retrograde or how long does it last? It's just more intense. It's like three weeks. It's three weeks of your life. So this one's going to be over on November 20th. Right before Thanksgiving when you go see your mom. Nah, my mother hit me up yesterday and was like, I'm going to be in Brooklyn today.

Really? Yeah. And I was like, I got the podcast. so I'm not going to be able to see you today. You're not going to see your mom? No. Are you her only child? No, I'm a middle child.

Uh-oh. She got two other kids. Yeah. She can see them. But she seems like she loves you. She does love me. Yeah. We love Marie.

I'm trying to think what else happened. I just said that I'm your mom as well. Just said he is my mom. Andrew called you mom earlier today. He did. He said mommy. Which was racist and homophobic, so that's fine.

I mean, I saw that when I wasn't on the couch, but it wasn't my time to shine. Oh, okay. There's a lot going on here. Or you got something to say to Andrew? You want to pull up on it? Nah, I love everybody here. Because he won't cut you out of this whole episode.

I don't think that, you know what? This shit is rad. I think Gloria, and then it'll just go right back. Just think of Zara Drop and Zara. Zara will be in there. Then that's it. Zara's like Zatarans. What is Zatarans?

What is that? I don't know, something from New Orleans. No, New Orleans. But let me, I think this one time, I tell, honestly, like I tell bad stories unless I write them down. yeah but you got notes we believe in you sis

I know but yeah you said you over prepared for this I did but now I'm trying to see the stats you know let me tell y'all I was dating

the reason why I hate Andrew is because I dated a Scorpio and he hurt my feelings what did he do how did he hurt I'm gonna tell you right now great he had back problems

so the strokes was shallow leave me alone I'm gonna get there thank you he had back problems so he was old okay go ahead no no no

he was like he was like 31, 32 something like that okay he was cute we had great sex but he stopped over at my house one day

and I didn't know he had back problems so he took my two good pillows because you know you only have two the rest of them are from Target

the cheaper ones for decoration he took my two good pillows and I had to be up at six in the morning and I feel like Andrew's going to

block this whole shit out he took the pillows home? no no no I'm like where did he take them? he took them to put them under his back okay for lumbar

right because his back hurt but he didn't tell me that shit So, like, on top of after we had sex, he didn't want to cuddle with me. So, I was up until 6 o'clock in the morning, distressed about... Whoa. What? Hold on. We at my house.

You sullying my sheets. But I'm just... You don't want to cuddle with me? That's what I said. Then you can go home. I know, but I'm considerate and I care. No, but sometimes people don't want to cuddle. Marie is hot.

No, it was winter. Like, your breath is hot. You're at... Sydney, we are in my home. Yes. This is my space. Oh, so, oh, I have to cuddle at your place. Is that what you're saying?

I don't have a choice. If you don't want to cuddle with me, go home. No, no, no. I want to be in the bed with you. I just don't want to cuddle. I just don't see the point of you coming over if we're not going to cuddle. That's what I'm saying. Bitch, what?

Because I can be by myself. Right, right. I don't need you. And you taking the good pillows. Right. So you getting good support on your back, but nobody's spooning me. My pillows are spooning you. Get in with some good luxury pillows.

Okay. You got them from West Elm? Y'all bitches need to know how to be independent. Sydney, you are queen of the cuddles. so don't even get you don't cuddle no Sydney loves a cuddle I don't really cuddle

you don't cuddle so when I want it and you don't give it to me I be incensed well Marie we could cuddle after nah Sydney you don't get dandruff

on my pillowcases now you're supposed to cuddle after sex do you cuddle after sex Andrew after sex I just go to bed so I guess

his back be blown out Andrew be like whoo but Sydney you let me get the rag so I can wipe myself off in the white

on the wet spot Sydney you literally tried to hold my hand on the way to Shake Shack I did yeah Sydney's just playing devil's advocate

she if anybody at this table likes cuddling it's Sydney are you the retrograde is like strong as F because

we're going at it again no but we were fine Andrew and then you brought it back I don't think that you guys are going through anything right now I think we're good

are we okay this seems like it's a normal it's not normal yeah this is fine I mean we usually be like like It'd be a little bit more

But you know I should like Add in some like Slap sound effects Oh really Oh why Add throwing a drink Into somebody's face

Add a sound Like that Water splashing Make it more dramatic Add a DJ Clue bomb too Whenever I say Zara He doesn't know who that is You don't know DJ Clue

No he does not Sorry He doesn't know What edges are bitch My bad You think you know Who's DJ Clue You know what

I'm at the Atlantic Barclays Center You know it's fine Okay So he doesn't want to cuddle He has your good pillows I'm up like wondering like is it me you know

in your own house in my own house there's a stranger in your house I talked about this last week women like to blame themselves for stuff that men do is it me why don't you want to cuddle with me so I tapped him politely I know you shoved his shoulder and then he was like I always ask people

what time did you do this at 6 o'clock in the morning in the morning because you're in my house that's rude I couldn't sleep you can't honestly I agree with you honestly come over here if you wake me up at 6am

I'm not gonna be nice to you he wasn't being nice to her anyway he wasn't cuddling I gotta add he's also West Indian he was Jamaican

that's why he didn't want to cuddle sis cause he's Jamaican not cause he's a Scorpio what's wrong with you they don't cuddle you lucky he didn't beat you after that

I know I know okay I tap him like this a very tiny I know you sure didn't you heavy handed bitch

don't you dare you got a heavy hand I was like, hey, I want to cuddle. He's tight. Why didn't you just wrap your arms around him in the bed? Because I don't want to be a big spoon. That's the problem. That's probably why he didn't want to cuddle.

He's like, I'm tired of always having to be the big spoon. Well, that's not my problem. That's not my fucking problem. Obviously, it is your problem. And he was one of my hoes. So it wasn't like we saw each other all the time. It was like once a month. So it's like if it's once a month, you could cuddle.

That's a good schedule. Yeah. Once a month for the Jamaican hoes. Damn. So whatever. He's like grumpy. be like oh like try to huddle and then he tried to get I was like also can't sleep my I don't have a good pillow so he yanks the pillow out and gives it to me and I was like I don't need anymore I

gotta be up at eight so you woke him up to cuddle then ask for the pillow that you didn't need because you had to be up in two hours petty he turns around starts putting on his clothes I'm like where are you going he's like I don't feel welcomed in this home well you were leaving I gotta get up and do my beauty routine it hurt my feelings and that did happened it happened during it happened during a retrograde i mean our relationship wasn't that feels like that could be any day honestly like any day with any sign with anybody honestly you said jamaican and i was like it's not it's not about the retrograde okay so you know i got things fucked up so maybe maybe mercury you said i don't need this pillow no more

You're going to be up in two hours. Petty. No, I'm dead ass. So Petty was real. We went through a lot. We went through a lot. I also, he's also, like he was one of my main hoes. Like he had some good dick.

It was curvy too. That's a, a lot of people don't know you need curvy. He had a curly fried dick. But you like that? You don't like a curl? He's an expert. No, no, it's a, he's an expert in dick? Yeah, he is.

Probably. I mean, he thinks he is. What do you mean you don't like a curl? Like it's like a little hang. I don't think, I've never. How much of like a degree are you talking? oh I don't know I'm not good at that

like maybe he is she said maybe she said his dick had a right angle is it like no it didn't

it was a sharp turn is it dramatic no it was really organic it just went like organic see I've never dealt I think with that cause a lot of people

just do girthy or long but you really need a curve cause it really hits the oh that's so annoying yeah it hits it's a different orgasm I don't know

because then when you have that it's like you can't even you can't do anything with it what you mean you can't bend it you know what do you do when it has the curl like it's so stuck in that way i like that yeah but you put it inside you

when it is fine no no well what else are you gonna be doing with the different way he puts it in his mouth in his ear near his eye yeah i'm lazy too yeah unless i have to keep you that's a different story i mean you pull out the good tricks right at the end like after you some crazy shit it's like oh i can do this you know fyi i didn't do anything today but look what i could do right because you can never give your best work up front then they expect that all the time oh didn't even know that do you learn that in retrograde or that's just like a regular bring it back i might have learned it you know what it's a real look it really affects me heavy because i'm a gemini does it fuck up your period like what no that you know the problem is that

you probably don't feel it because we also have periods and you know. Ah, yeah. Everything that you're saying. Sounds like a lot of excuses about why we don't be feeling it. Okay, wait, okay.

So what is, can you tell us something that you feel like we need to know about Mercury and retrograde or anything that you came with today that you either noticed that you feel like you need to touch?

Well, okay. This is what I'm going to say. I'm going to say that even if you don't believe it or not, Sydney. What, bitch? I'm looking at you. Thank you.

Even if you don't believe it or not, this is still a good time to reflect on your relationships and like yourself and see like do you have any people that you gotta get rid of well cause it's the end of the year sis

and that too so you talking about resolutions you talking about new year's resolutions honestly you talking about secret Santa sis

you gotta get rid of some people cause not everybody's gonna get in the secret Santa well this is a good time to do that during venture grades like you know I don't really got the budget

for all these people I don't even like them like that this is true cut some people out but sis after a certain age it's hard they already cut the cuts are made

but you know what I was still learning and growing so I'm using it as a barometer to figure out my life so that's why people it's a negative connotation

because you cut niggas out you're like well retro girl you said it was time for you to go I'm about to clean my whole Instagram too after I leave here

what happened you deleting people now I follow too many people I gotta fix the ratio okay yes what's up with the ratio she followed too many people your ratio is not good

a lot of people your ratio isn't good Sydney we have talked about this before hold on Wait, sorry, I have like 23,000 people I'm following. If I'm following like 2,000, that's fine. How many people is City following?

She's allowed to do that. She's over the 20K. She's allowed. That sounds like it's fine. Okay. Well, what's your ratio? How many people you follow? I just, because you know, I got into comedy, so I'm like, okay, you look like a nice person,

but some of them don't go to my shows, so delete. Right. Like that. They don't like my pictures either. Like, what the fuck are you following? There's a lot of them out there. Since the algorithm is- I don't give a fuck about the algorithm.

What's going on with the algorithm? go to my motherfucking page we talked about it last week but I don't get it like there's some people that I'm like I know that we're friends and they have not liked

something in weeks but also certain people that you follow you go to their page and you're like oh I haven't seen these last four photos

they didn't come across my feed we're not seeing their photos and they're not seeing our photos either there's some people I was like

you really not fucked I really got upset I don't know are they lying that it's the algorithm or how do you know

if they post like too frequently i know like i always see nini leaks at the bottom of nini leaks you follow nini leaks i do follow nini okay what are you going through oh he's very rich she's always at the bottom of my feed because she's she's posting a lot and everything and it's like it's all well what the hell is nini posting let's look yeah because you know she's gone so if i don't so if i don't post enough then i'm at the bottom of the because i don't post on my actual page i i i'm in my insta stories a lot no that's fine that's not really effective how do i get back up in the algorithm i don't know sydney we all struggling yes we all trying to figure out how to do it we

don't know in the picture no text in the picture just post funeral photos no text in it if there's text in the picture then it's likely that it's not going to be i mean nini posted this yaki wig one of my favorite yaki wigs is back well because she posted her like um her uh sponsored post because she's trying to pay her bills so it's gonna be at the bottom so you're saying my ads are at the bottom too is that what you're saying wait what what ads are you talking about on your page uh well i've been promoting the our podcast i'm on another podcast oh yeah like shows like marie was saying um with uh if the picture the first picture has text in it it's not gonna do as well maybe it's good here she got her nose done again what mercury retro you fucked up that

fucked that up too i'm gonna just blame it on that honestly sometimes it's an excuse if you're a bad person or going through some shit to blame it on someone blame it on the rain okay okay i I feel like I didn't teach y'all hoes nothing. Well, can you tell, because it seems like you're really into astrology as well. I am. Can you kind of go through each sign and tell us a little bit about each sign?

And then we'll have another expert who really knows astrology to talk about it. We can name this Mediocre. Mediocre. No, it's going to be Mercury and Retrograde. This is great. But you are a fire. Zaras.

Zaras. Yo, fuck yeah. Thank you for that. Yeah, what are you talking about? This is great. Or maybe tell us about ourselves. Sydney's an Aquarius. I tried to tell y'all,

but y'all weren't listening. I was like, this is who I am. Well, I mean, sis, Mercury's in retrograde. We don't have time. Yeah, that's what it is. It's the communication is fucked up. I'm going to go through all the signs, just like a little bit what I know about them. And y'all can tell me if you've dated someone from that sign.

I've dated them all. It's a little game. I'm a whore. It's a little game. Let's play a game. It's okay. It's fine. I think everybody in here is a hoe.

Everybody in here is a hoe. You know, we all been hoes. It's fine. Okay, so Aries. I really think you should date an Aries. And they go well with Scorpio, too. They actually all go well with all of us. Aries is like April, May?

It's like the end of March to the middle of April. Okay, so my dad and my brother are both Aries and they're both assholes. Well, a lot of people are assholes. I mean, I am too. So, I mean, there's that. So, we have that in common. But Aries is a fire sign and they're really good at just initiating, getting things done, right? They're always at the gym.

If you know an Aries, they're always at the gym. Okay, let's see what this African man is because he's very aggressive and he'd be at the gym. He might be a Capricorn. yeah they're always at the gym Taurus stubborn they're kind of boring they're so boring so before I was going to do Mercury Virtue

I was going to talk about how I went on a Tinder date to Africa wait somebody flew you out? flewed out? well time out I bought my own flight because if they fly you out they expect sex okay well what was you going for? what was you going for? you were going there for friendship? you were going for safari? what the fuck is wrong with you?

you was going to see a white man in Africa? I was going because I was mad at my boyfriend. So I wanted to be spontaneous. If I'm mad at my boyfriend, I'm not buying a ticket to Africa. Someone else will buy it. If I'm mad at my boyfriend, I'll bang somebody in Africa. But he paid for everything on the trip. Like, it was really, he was so sweet.

But you still paid, though. So you in the hole. But he, I only. So, and did he get in the hole? No, he ate my ass. All right. Well, the hole was filled. I mean, you flew out to get your ass ate.

But it was nice because we had Moet in the morning. he did a lot back there I don't like getting my ass ate like that it sounds like you do it was like a thing, an experience to have I don't like that shit so you're mad at your boyfriend somebody slides in your DMs and says

come to Africa I want to see you he didn't slide in my DMs we were talking the year before I just keep hoes around for backup just in case they come up once in a while so I was mad at my man we were supposed to go to NOLA

And he's like, I'm not ready to take a couple's trip. How long had y'all been together? For like a year. And he wasn't ready for a couple's trip? He wasn't ready. And he made me take PTO at that time. I had a real job, whatever the fuck. Well, I still have a real job now.

I'm, I guess, a legend. Barely, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just legendary for me. So he made me take time off from work. And after I took it off, he's like, I don't want to go anymore. So this guy had been in my DMs like, oh, it's my birthday. I'm like, what are you doing for your birthday?

He said, I'm going to Morocco. Pull up. Morocco. Cute. And I was like, I want to go to Morocco because everybody was going to Cuba at the time. And I like to be a different bitch. I'm like, nobody's in Morocco yet. So I like to be a trendsetter.

Right. Also, you can get some rugs if you need them. No, they got some real good rugs. Some cute fabrics. They got some good rugs. You just went to, you just went to Morocco. Nobody said, pull up to Morocco then. Pull up.

It's money in Morocco. It's not that far from Casablanca. And I didn't, I wanted to go, but you can't go to Morocco by yourself. So I was like, he's a chaperone. He said, fine. Chaperone. Chaperone date. So whatever.

I go to Morocco. I actually fainted on the I have a whole thing like I fainted on the plane my bun came out I had like a fake bun on it was a lot you had a sock bun

I did thank you I love you you fainted on the okay so what happened how did you faint well I mixed NyQuil with an edible

so no so genius you didn't want to be you didn't you didn't faint sis you almost died you know my whole

my whole life that was suicide sis yes to be honest like I it was so it was terrible like my body got hot

I fainted before like on a train before you know like before doing the same thing no you just faint because you're exhausted but this was I think it's called

I think it's called falling asleep you're saying fainting but you did did you faint or did you pass out you blacked out and woke up in Morocco

sis were you on lean it sounds like you were on lean you were linked out honestly if you mix the two it sounds a little weenie sis you had codeine you were drinking

you were drinking a work future that's what you are thank you codeine got it So I fainted on the plane and it was crazy because like my hair at the time was really short, but it was like, it's not trimmed or anything. It looked like Sonic.

It was, it was bad. It looked like Sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog? Yeah. Do you know what the Sonic is? The driver? The burger place? Okay.

So we in this hot ass country and I got my hoodie on because I'm about to let you see me like this. Like it was not a good look. Sis, you flew to Morocco and didn't make an appointment to get your hair done? I didn't have the time. But you were trying to go to NOLA. Sis, where did you? I'ma leave you alone

I go through a lot Thank you Retrograde Thank you My whole life Is on retrograde We could just We could just

Chalk it up to that You know Whatever So does it sound like You just Dominican I'm a Dominican Gemini Which is

Woo Dominican I'm kinda crazy sometimes No it's good All the time I am You know And I just

But it was That was the worst part Of the trip The whole trip was nice But like I said He was a tourist And he was just Really boring

Like it just It wasn't So you don't have to Well you wasn't Trying to bang him sis Well I feel like Taurus are very stubborn and, you know, bullheaded and they don't have time for the bullshit. I feel like that's Aries.

Well, Aries can be a little stubborn too, but they like, they really care about you. Like deep, deep, deep, deep. Taurus, they don't give a fuck about you. They're just really selfish. Yeah, they are. You could die in front of them and they'll go out to the club to the next day. And they're also really materialistic and shit. I'm Gemini.

Wait, I just finished this. I just want to finish this Morocco thing. How long were you there? We went for a week and a half. So we went to Morocco. A week and a half, and all he did was eat your butt one time? I mean, he ate me out, too. But I didn't feel comfortable.

That's how you get a yeast infection, friend. Well, he ate me out first and then did the butt. The next day? Like, it was two days. Thank you. And you said that's how you get a yeast infection? He ate her butt, and then he was like, okay, well, I guess I do the front now.

Because I got a little more time. He said, we ain't got to check out yet. Back, back, forth and forth. Let me see you go back. Let me see you go full. Y'all ruined that song for me. Thank you. Thank you for ruining a classic.

Okay. Oh, my God. I feel like I'm always fascinated by women that travel with men. It was a first. Maria's taking notes, bitch. It's okay. It's okay. She's for her next trip.

Hey, let's talk about it. I'm like, and nobody had to. You didn't want to? Why didn't you want to? She's like, what's his name and number? Because I had a boyfriend at the time. Is he ugly? Well, you had a boyfriend when you knew you had a boyfriend.

We were kind of breaking up, and I felt like- I see what you're doing. You had a- Yeah, so if I had sex with him, I felt like he would be upset. But the way that guys ask questions, they be like, did you have sex on the trip? Getting your ass ate, it's not really- Oh, the loophole. Yeah, it's a little loophole.

A booty hole loophole. I was omitting. I knew we were going to be at the end of our relationship anyways, but I don't know. I didn't want him to think I was like, you find me out. We haven't slept. You were like, I'm not no hoe like that. I'm like, you can eat my ass, but I'm not a hoe. I go to church and it's-

And I shop at Zara's. Okay, wait. So, is he ugly? What's wrong with the man in Morocco? Yeah, why you didn't want to fuck? He must not be cute, sis. You don't want to fuck underneath the Moroccan sun? The fucks are better over here.

I don't think you can fuck out there. I think they like rules and shit. Shut up. There's rules about getting your ass ate in Morocco. Yeah, but you can kick your ass. If you can eat butt in Morocco, you can have sex in Morocco. There was like a club. like we had to leave

at a certain time I'm crying my eyes out I'm dead ass well yeah because it's still the Middle East he wasn't my type okay then but you went all the way

to Morocco you don't just go to another country and be like oh I'm gonna hang out with this dud and not do anything like fuck

that's crazy that is crazy that's on you sis I don't care I just I don't care I'm not paying for my own ticket

to go there and be like well I bought my own ticket you ain't not fucking okay let me tell you it was a little package It was like, we're going to go to Casablanca, Marrakesh, and then Portugal. Right.

For $600. Okay. $600? Y'all was like in the bus? No, we flew. Marie, can we do that? When did you do that? I went, it was like in 2018.

Marrakesh, Casablanca. It's a website called Air Wander. So what they do is. Oh, no, I know about that one. What's up with that? Air Wander.com? We're trying to do that for Christmas. They got an app?

Or not. What they do is they like capitalize on the layover. so like oh bitch you taking pit stops that are like two days it was a three day layover

girl bye no no no no no but that's how you see different places a three day layover you're not in the airport for three days you got ass ate

in the hotel nigga that's a cruise that's what it is that's a cruise that's on the air look I went to the motherfucking castle in Sintra

it was beautiful and I felt like he was falling in love with me cause guys love it when you don't love them back he was falling in love okay that should be the title

of the episode guys do love it when you don't love them back When you don't be pressed, that's when they be in your inbox like, eh. He was like sleeping on my breast on the train. And I was like, I'm going to tell you something. I'm not looking for a relationship right now. Like when we were in Portugal, I felt bad.

That's because you had a return flight back. If you would have just run away, you'd be like, well, love is love. Love is blind. It'll take over your mind. You hear that harmonized right there? Yeah, I heard that. Okay, so he's not your type. he's kind of sloppy

and slovenly looking he don't got a good body you got a picture of him yeah show us the photo I'm not showing y'all a picture I'm gonna tell you what happened I never tell people what really happened

let me tell you what happened every time I hear it let me tell you what happened it's a long drawn out story that I'm like what happened it's not it's that when we pulled up to the airport

he had something on his tooth like it was like I think shit no no it was doo doo it was doo doo from the last girl

ass he ate yo he just eat ass professionally on tour it's an ass eating tour Well, what time? When is he going to be in New York? You know, I'm just trying to see if he has any availability.

It's seven o'clock on the dot. You got doo-doo on your tooth. He's in Seattle right now. Yo. Okay, so he's in Seattle in the rain. Yeah. So you go to the airport. What's on his tooth?

I don't know. I think he had like a gingivitis or something. And then that ruined the whole thing for me. I couldn't kiss him. I'm not kissing you. I'm not but I let him eat my ass because it's different

you got gingivitis in your booty hole yeah you obviously don't care about your ass at all she said it's fine you're like well you know it's like

the recycling can it was the morning you said it was the morning you got your ass ate and the sun was up in the morning that's weird it was like a wake up call

it was like I'm not doing that shit wait did you wake up and he was already back there it was like I don't y'all said okay fine

I guess it's a miracle just tell us the story no no like we woke up in the morning and he's like you know trying to kiss my body and he just went down there and ate my ass.

He didn't ask. No consent. It was consensual. I would have told you if it was... Well, she tooted her butt up. I was like, let me just...

She tooted. She put a pillow under her stomach so he could... Sometimes I involuntarily tooted it up. I was like, I didn't mean that.

I didn't mean to do that. You'd be like... But your body wanted it. Yeah. It was a moment. Yeah. I feel like teeth... No.

I feel like teeth... People don't understand the importance of teeth it was just like I knew that if if you had a green thing on there that you didn't care about your life like it was like a it was a fungus thing I don't know

yeah so it was green it really ruined the whole trip for me it was a cavity sis maybe yeah but you know it's fine we all were vulnerable honestly it was really just like that mercury and retrograde toothpaste yeah I didn't have I didn't have hair you didn't have hair you had

mercury wasn't retrograde yo how did your wig fall off on the plane. Nah, it was very dramatic. Turbulence. Nah, it was very,

we were sitting in the back of the plane and- You was on Spirit? Nah, bitch, it was on Air Morocco. Oh, okay. Which is also Spirit.

Is it really? Yes. No, it's not. It's in the chain. Shut up. I look up airlines before I fly them. Right,

because they falling out of the sky. I've been looking up air models too. I don't give a fuck. You want to see where the seats are? Yeah,

I'd be like, what kind of flight is this? Has it been in an accident before? I'd be looking all that shit. Is it a new or refurbished plane? Yeah, I don't do refurbished planes. You'd think a plane for $600 is a good plane. It was a layover.

It's fine. You know what? Leave me alone. Glory, legendary. Thank you. Okay. Anyways. You're in the back of the plane with this man with the green teeth.

I'm through with this story. So, Beale, I just want to know how the wig came off. I'm done with the story. Okay, well then, keep doing your braids. I went to go. I thought I had to throw up. So I went to go throw up in the bathroom. Because you took an edible and a NyQuil.

Yeah. I didn't realize. I didn't know that a NyQuil was a sedative. A sedative? You get the sedatives at Zara's. Zara's. Yo. Merch.

Well, now I learned how to say that word. Okay, wait. It's a sedative? Sedative. Sedative. Because English is not your first language. I get that. No, I understand that.

It's a sedative. They're both sedatives. So the front, the connect, whatever was going on with my frontal lobe cord right here. What's it called, Andrew? I have no idea your frontal lobe your forehead yeah my forehead

thank you I'm wrong all the action just shut down so like I stepped out of the bathroom and then I fainted like I just

oh the air pressure no oh no I just fainted I just fainted and I I wasn't prepared for that trip because I was doing a lot that day

I just put my hair in a little bun I was planning on putting my tracks on when I landed right right that's the real tea you was going through customs with your bundles

yeah that's what I'm about to put What is this? You always got to pack extra tracks because you don't know what your hair is going to do. This is true. This is true. So I was going to put him on the plane so he wouldn't see me. You know, because guys, they be looking at you and shit, whatever.

But the bun came out, wasn't secured. When you fainted. Yeah. And the funny part is that when I was getting off the, all the airline, all the flight attendants, they didn't speak good English. I'm like, sir, I'm looking for this like thing. It looks like a donut. It fell.

And rolled. Yeah, it fell and rolled because I needed it for the trip, you know, because it was a lot. Because you needed a bun. You needed it. I needed hair. Princess, princess. I need hair, because I'm about to be

taking these Instagram pictures when my hair was good. Like, I needed to put something there. Why did you wear the half wig, sis? I didn't know about that back then.

I just got put onto it. A young baby, yes. I got put onto it like earlier last year because I was... The upgrade, yeah. Yeah, you know, now I be doing the half wigs

everywhere, but I don't really, I haven't really had sex with a half wig yet, so... I don't think that you should. Yeah, half wig is, you take it off. It's a half wig,

just take it off. But then you'll see me. But you have hair, sis, now. don't be looking like this. I don't even like my hair like this right now. Why? I don't like it. It looks soft and healthy. Look at my edges. They're not even laid or anything. You don't need them to be laid. Yeah, you're fine. You're good.

Girl! You're beautiful. It's just natural. It looks good. It took a long time. I used to perm my hair. It took a long time to get here. For you to love it? To get some inches. Now this feels like your hair journey. Sorry, you know what? Well, sis, look who you're talking to. I am a bald white

woman up top on my scalp and Sydney's taking her braids out. be here so like honestly your hair is right where it needs to be this is just home sis you just said your house is my house yeah it's in spanish multicultural no but isn't it supposed to be my house is your house uh don't you that's racist but i approved of it it's actually you just said Yeah, like you're claiming. Oh, so you stole my house?

Yeah. That's fine. Christopher Columbus. Right, thank you, baby. Commercial for Airbnb over there. Throwing the history facts in there. Yeah. But yeah, you know, honestly,

I promise y'all I came prepared. No, you did. It was great. We threw the ass in there and the hair and mercury and y'all don't even... Did you get your sack bun off the plane? No, because he didn't say what I was saying.

It rolled under first class. So you didn't just look? I was just looked around. I tried, but it's a big ass plane. I didn't want to look like I was trying to do something, you know? So I walked off the plane and I just put my hoodie on and that's it. And you in Morocco was 106 degrees.

It was 100 degrees with my hoodie on. And it's funny because we had to take one of those. I don't want to say anything incorrect, but we had to take, you know, you ever seen the movie Lion? Yes. So we had to take one of them trains that just, we don't know where that shit is going. And we're spacing each other like this. And I'm just there with my hoodie. The train is like the dollar van?

No, baby. No, it's like some shit. It's like a cross country. Yeah. It's not like a subway. It's like a proper train. Yeah, like where he got, the little boy got lost in a shirt. I forgot his name.

But yeah, he's looking at me with this hoodie, and I'm just like. So you could have put some of the tracks in? They was in your carry-on? They were in the bottom of, you know, the luggage? They weren't in my carry-on. Whatever the fuck the luggage was, you checked in. Oh, see? Lesson learned, listeners.

You have to put it in your carry-on. Always have your tracks in your carry-on. I would never put my tracks in my suitcase. Because if I lose my suitcase, where am I going to go? I'm also not traveling with a suitcase. I only, I'm not checking a bag of carry-ons. But I was going to Morocco. Yeah, sis.

Roll up all your stuff. Yeah, roll it up. When you pack, if you roll your clothes, they take up less space. And also, what are you wearing in Morocco? Turtlenecks? Like, what do you need? How many outfits are you trying to do? Well, I had this little one, like, colorful shit, whatever.

It's fine. We made it through. And then when I put my tracks in, I looked really pretty. But he's like, he could tell that I was wearing a wig or whatever the fuck. I need to see these pictures. Because the textures didn't match. The textures didn't match. You were like a silky body weight.

I didn't even know if I had them on my Instagram. You took them down? I always leave you doing my Instagram. You were embarrassed. I see you you're the type that be archiving photos I archive everything

y'all don't need to know what the fuck I was living a year ago y'all don't need to know that's a mess archiving photos I archive everything cause I don't know

people be doing I archived all my photos that kind of show titties cause people be weird cause show titties what's the problem I mean those the photos that should be at the top

that's how that's how you that's how you mess in the aphorism this is me and my Marco you see me with my scarf cause I didn't have hair for like two days

oh the scarf is cute it's cute it was a look Cardi B yeah this is nice I actually did you made him take this

yeah he took those photos that looks hot that was at the YSL how you say Yves Saint Laurent that's it I got that I love that yeah this is so good

I was at the garden I was supposed to go to Marrakesh on my whole trip but I didn't go you look great sis what are you talking about I'm just showing y'all you know it worked out

that outfit was from Zara's Zara's you know when they had the ruffle shit where's the scarf from Zara's I mean you could have picked up

a cute scarf in Marrakesh yeah that's actually your appropriation. Can you send us these so we can put a slideshow together for the artificial expert when we post this?

I cropped his camel out. And nobody needs to know that he was on a trip with me. And I hate bitches like that. You trying to act like you were on a trip by yourself? That's so rude. Well, he didn't pay.

He didn't fly her out but technically she was by herself. Also, he had gingivitis so he don't need to be smiling in none of the photos. You know? Thank you. Thank you.

But he took, you know, honestly, he did take some nice pictures of me look at this picture of me walking away that's why he was mad he's like oh you're not fucking and I'm just

taking pictures of you you took some nice photos he's not in none of the photos I love that yo can you show us him okay fine we're not gonna say who he is or anything

I just wanna see what he looks like I wonder what his oh he still has a oh you don't remember what his Instagram is all of a sudden you're probably blocked sis

oh wait so this is us I took this photo he had the this is his camel so I'm in the other camel okay hold on let me zoom in and see what's happening

he don't look I mean he don't look bad he look like he wears Zara's no he look like he wear like Balenciaga like Tim's

in the bed but oh no Jimmy Jazz let me see oh he's from Brooklyn yeah Jimmy Jazz dude

Jimmy Jazz I mean in those photos his teeth look fine I can't see none of them exactly you know how bitches be like

he's got a crust in his eye bitches be like look at the photo but then like he got crust in his eyes he's cute like he's not ugly he's fine

he's not ugly Okay, but in the Instagram. He wasn't good enough for you to have sex with, though. Nope. Nope. That's just what it is. I know. I thought about it.

When we asked, oh, what does he look like? Not good enough to fuck. You were like, oh, but I feel like getting your assie in is almost like more intimate. Exactly. Thank you. Thank you. Positive. Yeah.

Did you get a colonic? Like, what happened? Did you prep? You didn't know he was going to eat your ass. You don't have to do all that to get your ass ate. Oh. Well, who's his friend? Andrew, talk to her.

His friend's cute. He took a shower, I hope. Oh, right. that's what I said okay let me see you took a shower yeah like I had just

woken up it's fine I like it when you just you know take me as I am yeah you took a shower the night before

that's gross bitch you said you're going leave me alone that's disgusting thank you you've never just woken up and fucked

don't put your mic near don't listen to her don't she did say she was eating his butt yeah I would never eat a man's butt

honestly I didn't do anything but like drink champagne okay yeah okay well this has been an eventful little episode. Let me leave you

with a fact though because I feel like we completely went off tangent. Sis, we went through a lot of facts with you. We ended up in Marrakesh. We did an hour and 15 minutes of facts.

Did you feel like you learned? So what did you learn? I learned that you paid for your own flight to go to America, to go there. I learned about Air Wander. I might have to bring that back

for Eat, Pray, Ho, Chapter 2. Yeah, where are you going? I don't know yet. We'll see what these layovers look like. It's funny. Every time I say I shouldn't say this,

I'm going to just say it anyways. But I did like a little positive motivational speech over the summer for some high school girls. And they're like, girl, we want to hear a joke. And it's like, I can't tell you my jokes. They're all like kind of inappropriate. But I opened up. I did open up about getting my ass ate.

To these kids? What? You didn't want to say anything inappropriate. I didn't know. What? In the auditorium. We were going to college. In the auditorium talking about your ass eating.

Girl. What? What in the... Honestly. Oh, my God. That was a message well received. Sister Mary Clarence, what the fuck? So I asked them after.

I was like, okay, ladies, what did you learn about comedy? And they were like, we learned that you went to Morocco. Fantastic. And I was like, that's not... Please don't tell the principal that. They told me they weren't going to say anything. They definitely told the principal. The principal was there, sis.

He heard. They heard. They tapped the cafeteria. My whole brand is ruined. Is it? I don't know. Stop, bitch. I look crazy.

No, you don't. This is nuts All right I'm gonna leave y'all Cindy looks crazy I'm gonna leave y'all with a fact All right

I'm gonna leave y'all with a fact Can you stop I'm a fucking professional I'm a professional I'm gonna read it I'm gonna read it What are you reading

I'm gonna read a fact I'm gonna read a fact Okay I think Can we just like wrap this up Fine fine Cindy needs to go What were you trying to read

No I was gonna read a fact I just wanna make sure y'all learn something Sis you just wanna stay on the mic No no not at all I wanna Well obviously yes

Yes But I wanna know what did you learn Cause I don't wanna leave here like you didn't Oh, I learned about Airwander. Okay. That's a cool little app that I feel like I'm going to check out for real.

It's a website. They don't have an app yet. Sure, sure, sure. No problem. Learned that I could be compatible with Aries signs. And yeah, I'm going to keep procrastinating until I die. But I have a lot of ideas. I love that.

I have a lot of big picture things that I'm just like not putting together. But I'm going to get my ass together. We like a show of Charlo. I also learned that Sydney's an Aquarius. I had no idea. That's crazy that you didn't know that, Marie. I was like, she was born in February. That means fish.

Anything that was good. Yes. Cindy, what did you learn? I learned that retrograde is just like the earth spinning backwards. No, it's mercury. The earth does not spin backwards. It's just mercury. It looks like it's spinning backwards.

It's not. So all communication is just fucked. Oh, it looks like it's spinning backwards. But what does that mean? It's moving, but it's not moving? It's just like the earth is passing it faster, so it looks like it's going backwards. Oh. so it looks like it's taking a nap

so that's why all communication is off if anything just take that communication is off miscommunication so three times a year the earth moves faster than Mercury does a little bit yes and then what Mercury catches up

it's just a little nap it takes a little nap let's just put it like that but then eventually it catches up yeah it just or we just get lapped they lap it again Mercury orbits the sun faster than the earth

but for three weeks it goes a little bit slower than usual because it's a Capricorn got it no it's not Mercury is a Capricorn it's a Scorpio sis it's up

no it's an Aries moon rising Taurus that's what it is we're gonna do my birth chart on Amazon you know what

someone's gonna someone's gonna be like thank you yeah people are gonna say we always make fun of you know these astrological

folks but I'm one of them the comments the comments be like actually you guys got it wrong they might be

questioning your math too no I'm kidding that was aggressive you sound like Andrew right now Andrew man honestly

honestly we was just plotting no I'm kidding y'all could do it but it's not gonna be this no I'm kidding

andrew what did you what did you learn i'm compatible with capricorn right yes yes yes and also you got your ass ate in morocco in morocco of course on a tinder date also your hair fell off on the plane because you mixed nyquil with edibles you crazy wait i have a question wait how did you did you not have like smiling pictures on his profile how did you not see i don't really look for that shit when i'm looking i'm just like i just don't before booking a flight to morocco honestly it was the craziest thing i've ever done i was just i was like i'm That's pretty crazy. Because I plan everything in my life.

So it was like, yo, you got to live your life. And you also plan to die, sis. That was like a death wish. I know, but it was just like, you know, I had fun. It was worth it. Wait, hold on. Let's back up. So you had never met this man before?

We met one time. We went on one date. But yeah, we went on one date and he was just in my inbox still. Like at the right time. Regularly, yeah, yeah. Commenting on stories and posts and stuff like that. Yeah, so he's like, yo, if you're a real one, pull up. I just, are you?

Sis, if you're a real one, pull up to Morocco. that's psycho where were all his friends if you had said no he would have been by himself and I do want to caveat like he was in a fraternity I'm in a sorority

so like I knew that he wasn't like we had like we had like some kind of familiar ad or whatever the fuck familiar reality we got it

familiar familiar familiar anal sedative yeah sedative yeah all that shit I learned a lot of English

sedatives yes yo Glory thank you for being here this was fantastic tell people where they can catch you and like when you're

when the Latino Carver Vogue comes out. Tell them when they can get that. You can follow me on Instagram, Andrew, Legendary Comedian. Got it. I just followed you.

You can stalk me. Latino Carver Vogue comes out in November. We're going to be putting some holiday gift packets together. Oh. Are you going to send this one? I'm going to tell the team.

I'm going to tell the team. What? Wow. Send this one. I'm going to tell the team. Let's put y'all on the list. So you can talk about my cards. Well, you see, girl,

we got people sending us stuff from Fresh Direct and Red Bull. So, like, get it together. No, it's not good. Peanut Butter. and yeah that's pretty much it just follow me on Instagram

I'll be I'll be gassing everything up legendary comedian Andrew your social media before we go it's mcguiguy

that's m-c-g-u-i underscore guy g-u-y we love it yeah thank you and you guys know

where we at make sure you rate subscribe comment all that stuff and then we have our live show

Saturday which is tomorrow which is tomorrow it's at 5 o'clock at Union Hall did you get your tickets bitch we got D

we got D Nasty and we got Reggie Conquest it's gonna be fun these are like our favorite like messy hilarious people it's gonna be

phenoms and the show's early so you can get in get out come after brunch show up and then leave and then bounce

leave and then maybe go home get your ass ate by a dude that you don't really like yeah and Gloria will be there she said she's pulling up

if you can pull up to Morocco bitch you can pull up to Union Hall but I do be going to all y'all shits I be supporting no you do

I do you do be out that's why we got you be looking out we love you thank you we're gonna get you we're gonna get you a shirt

out of the merch shirts which ones do you which one did you like suck my dick oh that one didn't come out yet no not yet I mean so we we didn't

I like the merch one no I like the good hoe one the one that says hoe Ipre ho yes okay what size you need I'm gonna take a medium in case I fluctuate

okay we like that you can tie it you can tie it up you can throw it up you gotta see love you guys thank you for listening keep eating

keep praying keep hoeing stop paying for your plane tickets though yeah and don't be racist or homophobic that's all I gotta say

yeah yeah okay brush your teeth bye this has been a forever dog production executive produced by brett boehm joe cilio and alex ramsey for more original podcasts please visit foreverdogpodcasts.com and subscribe to our shows on apple podcasts spotify or wherever you get your podcasts keep up with the latest Forever Dog News by following us on Twitter and Instagram at Forever Dog Team and liking our page on Facebook.