MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - "The New Dad Expert" with Donnell Rawlings

Episode Date: February 3, 2017

For a very special episode of The Unofficial Expert; Donnell Rawlings drops by to talk with Sydnee & Marie about being a new dad and his new show on TLC, Project Dad!----Listen to The Unofficial Expert Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus:https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus----BONUS EPISODES AVAILABLE NOW ON PATREON:www.patreon.com/TheUnofficialExpertBUY UNOFFICIAL EXPERT MERCH:https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-unofficial-expert-podcastFOLLOW THE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT:https://www.instagram.com/UnofficialExpertFOLLOW SYDNEE:https://www.instagram.com/JustSYDbwhttps://twitter.com/justsydnycFOLLOW MARIE:https://www.instagram.com/Reeezyhttps://twitter.com/MsReeezyFOLLOW ANDREW:https://www.instagram.com/mcgui_guyTHE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT IS A FOREVER DOG PODCASThttps://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/the-unofficial-expertSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You are listening to The Unofficial Expert. You are listening to The Unofficial Expert. Hello. And hello. I don't know what that was. I don't know what that was either, but welcome to The Unofficial Expert. I'm Sydney. And I'm Marie.

Oh my goodness. The other black girl on the thing. Anyway, so this is a show where we talk to people who think they're smart, but we're experts too, right Syd? Yeah. expert on all things ridiculous and fabulous no not that's not true we've had some really good guests we've had we've learned so much about drugs and open relationships and we've learned about southern hospitality we've learned a lot we really did we even learned a lot about the hood

you know because i don't live there so i have no idea don't you aren't you from ain't you from harlem yeah yeah i'm just like well it's actually so hot now so it's not even yeah harlem is well that's what happens when you let others move in you know you start early with the shade marie i'm just that's that's what harlem is now harlem looks like greenwich connecticut right that's what it looks like sydney what were you an expert in this week uh not getting fired i feel like i'm on the brinks of getting fired because i keep calling out of my shifts so i picked up an extra shift this week to prove to them like you know i want to be here but i'm calling out on tuesday i mean next week as well so you plan when you're calling out yes i feel like for me whenever i've ever

called out it's been like just the day of like a couple minutes before my shift no you have to like think in advance you got to get your lies together you got to make sure your instagram is like off so you don't post a picture and say like oh i was sick but you really out somebody's birthday party so like i do it in advance i gotta get my lies that's probably why they keep firing me from everything that i do i had a friend who worked as a cashier at like king cullen or wall bombs or something one of those stores in high school and her family came in through her register and they're like we're going to the beach and so what she did because she wanted to go to the beach she just fake fainted at work she just fake fainted when her supervisor walked by so she'd

go to the beach that's too much like how do you fake faint does she know how to faint like she just was like and she fell on the ground she probably caught herself i don't know i don't know how committed she was to the role but the beach is not that serious like i'm not fainting and possibly wig falling off for all of that. But, I mean, maybe you want to. I don't know. No, I put the beach right up there with, like, bowling. After I'm there for a couple minutes

and the food that we bought is done, I don't want to be there no more. That's how I feel about the beach. I feel you on that. What were you an expert in this week? I was an expert at being sick on the train, so just blowing my nose consistently, you know, just, like, coughing all over people

that I don't know. So, you know, I was looking real sexy this week on the train. I'm coming down with a little something. uh this guy asked me for my number on the train and i sneezed and had like the sneeze juice on my hand and i was like did you want me to put my number in your phone and he was like nah he probably thought you were just high he was like man she's doing some crazy cocaine i was sniffing and everything but all i've been doing is drinking tea and honey i got some ginger tea right here i'm

just trying to be the best uh uninsured millennial that i could be this year oh definitely i feel like i'm coming down with something just sitting next to you thank you thank you so much not on the mics you know these are not fully paid for yet so just these are loans yeah we gotta take them back well i'm excited i feel like i i'm just i'm doing really well i don't know if you can hear it in my voice but uh it's not what i normally sound like but i feel like i'm giving like a tony braxton like realness voice right now wait can you can you give me a tony song just okay people don't want to hear that's it that's it there you go right there you like that that was good right we hit the note please tony barely be hitting the notes listen our guest today he

you probably know you were down down with tony our guest today is an actor a comedian he was a finalist in the 2004 world series of dice uh series championships he's the ashiest of all hilarious uh all around funny dude and he's our new dad expert yes he is give it up for donna rollins hey what's up everybody i would prefer to be uh a lotion expert but but since the the new thing of me being a dad i just got to take on that life but i'm more of an expert on lotion but the new dad thing i guess for the show today i'll be an expert day well can you give us how your your hands are a little dry today i know this is the weather this is the weather this is this this is the season for dry hands and ring around the lip

ring around the lip season starts uh every year i think october the second there's official ring around the lips and you know the guy who's about to get it because he's just all you hear all this and you're like you got chapstick no no no no no no no no no i'm gonna need chapstick for for that ring around the lip but this is the weather i think everybody's actually doing this weather i'm putting some chapstick on right now i think we're pretty good no i'm a little bit i'm a little bit dry but it's okay it's okay i mean i think it's um it's better for a guy to be ashy women being ashy it's kind of disrespectful wait i don't think i don't think that's true i don't think a man should be um moisturized too much like real men the only

thing they do is lotion their face in their hands and that's it face hands it everything else is covered up no unless you get into a new relationship if you get into a new relationship body gotta be moisturized you're moisturized but once you've been dating somebody for maybe like a year, then it's ash rules everything around me. You know what I hate? Like when people are really dry, like where their back is, and then underneath their ass. I'm like, you need to moisturize.

My question is, how do you find out if somebody has an ashy ass? Ash ass. Well, then the way people are wearing their pants now, you probably could see some ashy ass. People have the plumber butt all day. Damn near, don't even have any

drawers on. Sydney, how many ashy asses have you seen? in the last 12 months? At least five. The J train? Oh, ashy ass. Okay, yes. Well, you get in.

As long as you make your ass colder, you're good to go. So I want to call you Larry, but that's not what your name is. So Donnell, can you give us like maybe five quick lotion facts and then we'll jump into the new dad stuff. Five quick lotion facts.

If you take a bottle of lotion upside down and you don't even put pressure on the bottle and it drips out fast, that's not going to be the consistency that you want. That's Lubaderm. That's Lubaderm. That's Lubaderm. You know, I want to discredit any brands or anything, but Anne B or Queen B.

Queen B, that's not a good lotion. Anytime you can get lotion at 40 ounces for a dollar, I wouldn't suggest that lotion. Don't you dare. Another thing is that if you're going to apply lotion, it should be in a room temperature of at least 73 degrees. Because anything other than that, the lotion does not absorb and it stays white. You ever in a situation where it's cold out and you put lotion on and it feels like you're rubbing conditioner on your body the whole time? That's another thing.

And this is not even lotion, but if you really want to know the key to moisturizing, take a hot shower while you're wet. Warm up some baby oil while you're in the shower. This is a trick that I do. While I'm in the shower, I run a bottle of baby oil under the sink to get it hot. So when you get out of the shower while you're wet, you squirt yourself with the baby oil and then you rinse yourself and dry yourself off. and that will maintain

you'll be moisturized for at least I think that'll get you four to eight hours four to eight hours wait you rinse it off yeah you while you're wet

you put it on and then you rub it off this is how you bust your ass in the shower in the shower no no no you gotta put a make sure you put

an extra towel on the floor okay yeah who knows about that I'm telling you I'm an expert I know I'm supposed to be an expert on that but I'm really an expert

on lotion but that is the key to it if you want to be moisturized for a minimum of four to six hours water hot baby oil rinse it off

and you'll feel good about yourself so you're telling me you never slipped and slide bust your ass anywhere near the bathroom kitchen

no I've slipped and slide in the bathroom but it had nothing to do with lotion don't baby oil you never slipped and hit your head on the toilet seat

no I've slipped and slide in some things in the bathroom but it had nothing to do with lotion that's a great place wasn't ready it's not a good place

that's a great place no it's not you gotta expand you gotta live life no man tubs are too awkward the wall be slippery it's lotion bottles falling all over the place it's not being held right maybe that's what it was the ledge is too little you're trying to put your foot up it's it's too slippery my roommate um at the time she shaves with coconut oil oh she got money

yes she shaved oil was like eight dollars for like a couple ounces and i like used the bathroom after her and when i tell you i brought down the whole shower curtain the whole rod everything it It was like, yo, she shaves with coconut oil? Yeah, because that makes sure you don't get- Ingrown hair? Yes. Right. Yeah.

That's a problem with guys, too, but that's like when you shave. Are they using coconut oil at the barbershop? Because I feel like a lot of dudes- No, they don't use coconut oil, but I know with the ingrown hair, that's a thing that black guys deal with a lot when shaving. But a good way to get away from that is just to exfoliate. Am I pronouncing it right? sometimes. Yes, you do. Exfoliate.

You know, get one of those scrubs, whatever, and every time you take a shower. A loofah. You want it like a loofah? Okay. And one of those scrubs, like St. Eve's has the scrubs, like apricot scrubs. Oh, excuse me. Oh, I'm into this. I'm into this grooming game, but if you just keep your pores clean, you don't have to worry about

ingrown hairs as much. I am shocked. I'm learning a lot about you. I'm learning so much about you. This is great. But we're definitely, you're here today for our new dad expert. You're on a show on TLC called Project Dad. Yeah, Project Dad.

Project Dad, it was a popular show. It's a remake of a show that was popular in South Korea called Return of Superman where they take

three celebrity dads and they leave them with their kids for 48 hours to 84 hours at a time with no help from the mom just to see how you would fail and basically to see

the evolution of you as a dad. I know it's a short period to figure that out but at the end of the day what they want you to do is fail. Yeah.

So it's a test to see how well dads do. We did it on, it had a run on Discovery Life now and it's on TLC every Thursday 5 o'clock Eastern

but it's a good show it's a fun show I saw the clips you were really funny you were like I was like wow I would have a kid with him he was

is it that easy it worked yo all you gotta do is knock knock who's there mama I'm pregnant no no it was like

that's not what I mean no I understand you were really good no but a lot of women are attracted to dudes with kids right because they're like he's so committed

to be a good dad and it's like it's the best feeling in the world and like right now like like i'm not on a mission but like me and i'm like um i'm what you call an older dad and i know that i'm an older dad when you say older how older older we don't do that i'm an actor you know what i'm saying i don't have no industry age i'm ageless i'm ageless you're right you're a black man i'm i'm ageless black don't crack but um i know the age difference with my kids um my son and my other friends kids because when i was planning my son's first birthday party i called one of my friends i'm like you think your son could come to my son's birthday party and he was like if he can get off work so and i had to take it if he get off work you know i'm

making i'm making bottles and they're popping bottles with their kids but the old timer told me he said donald it's better to be um late to the party to not be invited at all so i'm enjoying it And with the feeling that I'm having for it, and I'm, like, so against, like, deadbeat dads and guys who don't want to be. I just don't understand it because my situation, I was there for the entire pregnancy from the time we found out we were pregnant. And, you know, men always say we until we get to the delivery room. Yeah, I'd be like, ah, I got it, I got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we about to have this baby. No, I'm about to have this baby.

You were in there? Yeah, I was in there. You saw the whole thing? I saw it. I mean, I'm telling you, when I say involved, I mean, for the first time, we found out we were pregnant to every sonogram, every doctor's appointment. I mean, I remember this one time, Stephanie had a doctor's appointment, and I was doing a show. I had a show Thursday and Saturday with Chappelle in Miami.

She had a doctor's appointment on Friday. I caught the first flight Friday morning to get to L.A. for afternoon appointment, and then we had two appointments, and then I went and caught a red-eye the next day to get back to my gig. And I knew I could have had one of my friends do it, but I was like, you know, if she's going to go through it, you know what I mean, I want to be there, like, every step of the way. And if you start, I mean, to me, that's where the real connection starts.

It starts there. So many brothers I know, that's like, oh, yeah, I had a baby. I haven't seen him yet. What? No, I mean, I know situations where, you know, guys. People be busy. Yeah, right. Did you go to Lamar's class or anything like that?

No, we didn't do the Lamar's class. But, like, I had every book and every app available. Did you read all the books? I read all of them. Why you had to say read? Like I don't read like that I mean maybe you I didn't read it out loud

You know what I mean I read it on the inside You read it with your You read it with your Finger moving on the page No an app I had all the babysitting apps You know those apps

Like your baby's The size of a peanut Your baby's the size Of an avocado And it was all like Not to say Vegetables are reserved For white people

But it was all like Your baby's the size Of an avocado Arugula I'm like do something I know like Your baby's the size Of two chicken wings

Or something like that But like it was just for me it was um it was just it was an exciting time and the whole experience up to like i i saw my son come out and like i don't care i started crowning and everything and she was in um induced so um you know she was like she was like she passed her she passed the due date so we went from ground zero to that point and i'm like when they say it's the most amazing thing you ever witnessed in your life like that's 100 true really like i saw it and i saw i saw him starting to come out, I was like, well, I don't know

what our sex life is going to be now. But it just, it's like, it's a miracle. You know what I mean? It's a miracle. Did she scream? Was she throwing stuff? Was she cursing you out? She didn't like, she didn't. I was like, I was really good. Okay. This is about you, so you're right.

Oh, I was great. I did a great job in the delivery room. I even had theme music. I brought a playlist. I was playing Salt-N-Pepa Push It. Stop it. What was playing when the baby came out? No, it was in my mind i started out i thought you had a spotify in the damn no no they didn't think it was a good idea i was having fun i was making memes in there like she thought it was gonna be easy so she's

watching tv and i took a picture of her and i'm like um the face you make uh the face you make before them contractions hit right and then like maybe an hour later contraction hit and her face was scrunched up right you took a picture i took another picture i was like the face you make when Shit just got real. You know what I mean? So, and I was sending them to her mom in the delivery room. We had a good time. I made it fun.

In fact, our doctor said that was the most fun she ever had in a delivery room. That's what I want. Even though doctors be lying, though. They have to say that to everybody. No, no, no. She wasn't because she was like straight forward. She didn't really. She was Asian?

No, she's a black lady. Oh, okay. Yeah, but she was like, she was dope. It wasn't about me. Every time we would go to the doctor's appointment, she wouldn't even look at me. She was like, so how are you doing, Stephanie? And I'm like, what about me? She was like, you already did the easy part.

She's got to do the hard part. But it was a great experience. So you had the baby. How old is your son? A year and a half now. Wow, really? Austin Donnell Rollins. I named his first name Austin.

Because I wanted him to have a fair, shaken life on paper. His last name's still Rollins, though. No, Rollins is like, if you think about it, the biggest Rollins name is the name of the sports equipment, the footballs and the baseball gloves. I don't know nothing about that stuff. Never heard of it. Rollins to me sounds like a country old man with like a tin can hat.

Their own slave years back in the day. That lives in like a little shack house. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Austin Rollins. That's a good name. Austin can go to anybody's house for dinner. Anybody can welcome him. Austin Donnell.

I know, but he don't put... I was like, we fought for that. We fought for that because I wanted a junior. And she was like, no, I don't want to put him through that. She trying to tell you that she hates your name. She didn't hate my name, but she just... Where society is now, like again, like I said on paper, she wanted him a fair opportunity like out the gate.

Austin Donnell Jr. right now. I stuck to my guns on wanting Donnell to be his middle name. How do you feel about, like, really hood names? Just, like, people who name their kids, like, Nevaeh, which is, like, heaven backwards. I think, like, I think when people do that, in some way, they're trying to make their kid individual and creative. And it sounds, the process of it sounds good when you think about it. But, you know, when you start going to school and a teacher has to read a certain name. Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? When they start looking at you on paper, whatever, it might not be the same. star is there a star star quasar all but honestly they can get these russian polish all these names right they can't yeah but those names they know that that's a white person a black like when your name sound black they're like oh yeah i think anything with quita or quake nita q shida asia kasha no that's soul sister right there you know it's gonna be a soul sister my name is marie so i'm out here doing well i mean i'm still unemployed but you know i'm doing really well but marie they want to know you're unemployed on paper they're like oh marie must have a great job somewhere yeah

yeah we're never we're never gonna be able to get maria shaniqua i know she won a job but maria maria has so many options i mean i judge him too i went to school with a girl named shaniqua and when i met her i was like that's your real name like you can't go by your middle name or whatever when i was in oakland everybody had crazy names and i just thought it was the norm i when someone had a regular name like brian no like me like sydney they were like you can't be in you're you're too basic like i know a girl named lucretia lucretia and that's so bad because you know kids play so much i know in school when she was younger everybody's ew it's lucretia that kid that's disgusting lucretia not luc not lucretia oh sorry she's she's she's dyslexic

anytime you can get her pregnant off of a joke you know she's gonna go there anytime like It was a knock-knock joke. Sidney's a hot-ass mess. Can you tell us a little bit about your dad growing up? My dad was interesting. I had a dad that chose a lifestyle that didn't really give him the opportunity to spend as much time with his kids as he wanted to. My dad was a drug dealer.

Oh, he didn't choose that life. That life chose him. Yeah, but it's a lot of circumstances on why he chose that. But I know, like, you know, as I get older or whatever, you know, he did, he was in and out of prison. He was a great, he was a great dude when he was out. But I told myself, you know, my son, like, I want to, the most important thing about, I think, parenting or being a dad is, like, creating good memories. Yeah. You know, I mean, like, I think that, you know, my son's only been on Earth for, like, a year and a half.

And I think that I have more memories with him in that short period of time than my dad has had, you know, my entire life. Well, I mean, in this day and age, we have, like, photos. Everything is so instant. Before, you had to, like, get a Polaroid and shit. But, like, now, you can take selfies. They got, like, drones where you could do, like, videos. Yeah. You could do anything.

And I'm doing all of that. I didn't think I was going to be that dad. I'm like, yeah, I'm not going to be the dad. I do what I call, when I see people and I find their kids, I do what I call baby picture uno. Where it's, like, you pull out your camera. You're like, look at this. It's like, okay, draw two. That's a reverse.

You know, and you get one, like, him talking. That's like a uno. but it's just Do you Snapchat? I need to Snapchat more I'm not really into Snapchat you know

Instagram you know all that other stuff but I need to get on Snapchat How do you feel about people who have like Snapchat

and they literally they put their baby like on the Snapchat filter all the time like I know new moms are literally like just them

and their baby Oh they be in the hospital with the new baby smell I didn't think well that's just the world we in you wanna I didn't think

that I was gonna be that person that posts so much. I was like, I don't want to wear people out with it. But it's such a proud moment and you feel so good about it. You know what I'm saying? And like, you know, back in the day, you would talk about it,

but now, you know, your voice is social media and you can, you know, show people what you're up to. When your son was in the months stage, did you have pictures of him and there was like a number next to him saying, oh, he's three months. Oh yeah, I did it to a year. You did that to a year.

You did that to a year. I'm corny, I did it. Wait, I can't. Yeah, I did. You know, y'all don't have kids. No. Y'all talking trash right now. I swear to God, I can't wait to come and host your own show.

And I'm like, we got the expert moms. I'm telling you, you can say what you want. And you're like, yeah, whatever. Okay. And I've seen people switch. They have photo shoots. They literally have a photo shoot every month. Oh, the baby be on the alpaca rug.

Yeah, but I'm telling you, when you experience that, it's because, like, you see the development of your kid. You know what I'm saying? that's why like now i understand like when my mom used to yell at me and she used to be like you how you gonna lie to me you think i don't know you and i'm thinking like yeah you don't know me but like they know everything yeah they know your personality they know your attitude they know you from your temper tantrum stages so you can't pull you you know you can't pull the wood over the head and i understand you guys don't have kids but that experience like it's just so exciting and overwhelming that you just cannot not embrace it i don't know i got issues with commitment so

i probably have you have issues with commitment because you're not committed exactly i bring that baby back to the hospital like hey can i get the money back but i'm telling you i guarantee this i want to take a picture of your face right now but when you have that experience i'm telling you you're gonna be like boy i was young we was out here in the streets we were doing whatever but it's in a different place it's it's dope it's awesome but do you think that sometimes people are like exploiting their kids. Like just putting every picture on Facebook. I mean, some people want to get their numbers up.

And the best way to get your number up is nothing like an awe. You know what I'm saying? Like awe, like you have to like on a kid. No, you don't. I feel like... Oh, I've been scrolling past ugly babies all the time. Oh, I'm not messing with her.

Let me talk to you. You have to have a lot of numbers. You have to have a lot of followers because if you don't, your baby is going to get like, I don't know, 100 likes. and if my baby get a hundred likes

it's over like my baby better get a million likes you know how you do that you put your baby picture up and then you like put like a little bit of your butt cheek

in the photo and take a picture and then nah see now you can't mix your gram up like that three thousand likes that's the worst

you gotta twerk and have the baby there at the same time and I've seen people do that I've seen them do that it's so confusing with these Instagram

some people on Instagram cause you'll see like they'll like booty shot booty shot booty shot and then next thing you know it's like this the love of my life

You got your little kid up there. I'm like, yo, I just saw your ass. At least let your time, let it go where it's like a whole page down. You can't do ass, baby, ass, baby, ass, baby. Well, now it's the norm. So I don't even, now when I see ass, I'm like, no, we're the baby. Like, I want to, is the baby all right? You don't get tired of taking pictures with just your butt.

Like, your back don't hurt. I was on this girl's photo, this model's page today, and every single photo was her, like, her back was arched, her back was arched. I was like, well, what does her face look like? I mean just for the guys I'll steal the street I mean there's a certain position

a certain time where you really not even concerned what the face looks like I mean her whole page she had 167,000 followers there's angles where you're not even focused

you're not even focused on that face you're like you got a face I didn't even know that that means something you're going to talk out of that face I don't know

anything about that like my Instagram is mainly my face I barely have anything lower than that because I'm like this is my asset I don't know about

that's why we ain't got 10,000 followers yet We don't at all. We in the mid 40s. No, that would be a funny photo shoot, though. Y'all just do a very exaggerated ass pants or something. Ass pants, yes. And be like, does this work?

And just turn around. That would be funny. They have booty pops. Yeah, do that. Do that. We should buy booty pops and see what they do. We should have Donnell buy some booty pop. I'm buying.

They're like $18.95. You got that. You ain't scaring me. You're not scaring me. Donnell, I'm going to ask a question that I feel like everybody who's listening right now is wondering why didn't you bring dave chapelle with you today um dave chapelle um why didn't i bring dave chapelle i mean i was kidding but you know you answered it he didn't make himself available today oh yeah that's right and he and he knew he was gonna

he knew what he was gonna get into if he came in so he came i'm like the scouter i come out here and check it out don't do it son no but i'll just say dave chapelle wasn't available well he said He has a few kids. Three. Three. And did you learn anything from watching him? He has, like, daughters and a son? No, hasn't he had three boys?

He has two sons and a daughter. Oh, okay. Yeah, did you learn just hanging out with him? Yeah, I kind of learned, like, how you balance off, you know, like, being on the road. Yeah, he's so busy. Because for me, me personally, you know, I'm not a working actor. I'm a working comedian. So my money is on the road.

I always have to be on the road. but just watching him how he was how he's been able to balance the road life and at the same time knowing that you have to go home yeah you know i'm saying and like you know the fun that you had on the road and i'm not saying anything like negative or anything like that you got your road life and then you got your home life and you know you have to be able to separate them and you have to be able to be happy with both of them and make like a good balance with it in fact he was just on a episode on um on uh project dad and you know and he he said something that i thought was profound he said the day um he said that um that the days are long but the years

fly by fast and i really realized that with going back to what you said about the picture to one month it seems like yesterday i was taking a one month picture now he's like it's 16 months you know like those days they seem like they're forever but next thing you know that year's past this month's past next do you know well yeah i'm turning into one of these people now that like I'll see somebody's kid and I'm like, oh my God, last time I saw you, you were this big. No, this is the funniest thing for me. When you hear this, they're like, he getting so big. I'm like, unless he's Gary Coleman, he's supposed to get big.

They make it seem like that's like your son is going to be the best son ever because he's growing. Wow. Look at him walking and talking. But when I see people, like kids get older, I'm like, oh fuck, that means I'm getting older. Like I don't want, I want them to stay small. I want to stay the same. I don't want anybody to grow up. How do you think I feel when I meet people on the street and they come up to me and they

was like, I grew up with you on Chappelle's show. And this dude got a beard longer than mine. I'm like, damn, it's time for some dives, son. They was like, yeah. It was so funny because I was doing a project on MTV and the executive producer was like, yeah, man, when we was in college, we would get a bag of weed. We would get so-and-so. And then we would watch Chappelle's show every night.

And that's, you know, following what you're saying, time really flies. Chappelle, so what year did that end? I was in college. I think it was 2003 or 4. Yeah, I was in college. It ended in 2004? No, that's when it started. Oh, okay.

But it ended shortly after that. It only did like two seasons, two and a half seasons. I can't believe it was only two seasons. It just seemed like, how long were the seasons? They were long then. I don't know. I think a season would probably have been like 10 or 11 episodes. It wasn't a lot.

I mean, the Rick James, I felt like that was forever. it was literally man that sketch was getting people kicked out of school like kids were going to school like what did the

five figures say to the face pop I'm Rick James bitch it was a good time it was a great time and it's so funny because people

you know like being involved with a show that was so iconic as Chappelle's show almost anything that you do after that people try to compare it

or say well what happened you know what I mean but how often does a great show like Chappelle's show come around you know like

it doesn't and I've done some good things after that but you know for some reason like people that's how powerful that show was it's just so much in their brain like and people in a way they did the sketches they were like most of them were like like evergreen they weren't too often topical yeah that way they would they would they never get they could do anything but it's just like people like well how does you feel about the people you're coming up on you and calling you ashy larry blah blah blah i'm like

i've been ashy my entire life like even when we were preparing for the sketch dave was like so what are you gonna do to prepare for this role I was like just take a shower and come outside and just come outside and I'll be the ashes

dude in Hollywood leave me alone alright you can't I can't even tell you it's winter time the mic is very dry it's 30 degrees

you're soaking up the moisture let me tell you something it's 47 degrees right now and this is the problem of women nowadays and this is when they need to support

their strong black men because if you see me walk up in here and I'm ashy you as a woman you as a sister and as my queen and you should

have some and you said you live in Harlem you should have a tub of shea butter somewhere and you're supposed to support me and say brother I can't let you

and you gotta use that voice brother I can't let you walk in these streets ashy like that I was really old I'm touching knuckles right now and I can't

like my dad is dry like that my dad only puts lotion on when he gets out of the shower at night time he spends all day dry but I'm comfortable I'm comfortable

I mean you should be comfortable comfortable in my skin you don't say literally my ankles are pretty they're quite sure unexposed area is going to be ashy yeah but you you came you came in a car right you didn't take public transportation with them ashy hands no i would i don't care like i really have no issue with being ashy now how do you moisturize your baby because baby's got that soft you know the funny thing about it i don't know if it's dna whatever but my son really is ashy like i'm serious like I've never seen an ashy baby. No, I swear to you.

Austin, ashy, don't know. I swear to you. When I give him a bath, I swear to you, I'll put lotion on, and 15 minutes later, that's the first thing his knees are ashy as hell. What kind of lotion are you using on the baby? Baby oil. Yeah, I feel like that's what you should be using. Now, you moisturize him with baby oil. What about his gear?

I want to know how he looks, how you dress him. I don't know your outfit today. I don't know the vibe that your baby is in. Well, people, you know, Stephanie says that she wants him to dress more like a baby. Yeah, he should dress like a baby. But I don't. I want him to dress like me. Like, you know, that's a man.

A man to your son is like, yo, I got a hoodie, you wear a hoodie. You know what I'm saying? You want him to look like he got a mortgage. You got him a little bubble vest. It's a mix. I mix his looks up. Just like same thing, my style. One minute I might feel like real Brooklyn, and the next minute I might feel like, you

know, like a corporate swag or something like that. When do you have a corporate swag? Corporate. For me, a corporate, like, I'll say. Is that a blazer with a hoodie? No, a corporate swag for me would be, like, okay, maybe not corporate, but, like, business. I'll say business swag. Business swag.

It might be a nice jacket, a nice button-down, a nice pair of, like, high-end jeans. Not no Levi's. What's a high-end jean for you? John Varvatos is a high-end jean. Okay, yeah. Like Tom Ford, any of that. And then I might flip it with, like, some, like, floss sneakers. And floss sneakers, I mean, like, they could be Jordans.

but I get like again I love John Varvatos like John Varvatos Jimmy Choo would be a good one and just like

kill it like that because women know when you got your stuff together what's a good sneaker for a new dad and a dad on the run

like when you have because you can't wear your John Varvatos Air Force Ones yeah those hard there's like the old school ones

because they're so hard I know but the Air Force One they just like to me you could dress them up or dress them down

they're sturdy they're sturdy But they don't look comfortable You can't chase your cute With those You don't want them With fashion Yo really

A woman is trying to tell me A woman is trying to tell me Fashion needs to be comfortable With all these heels That be breaking people's ankles I didn't come into this room With heels today I'm not chasing my baby

With no heels If I have on heels And my baby gets away from me That's it That's the world's baby I swear I can't wait To have a baby I can't wait

I can't wait to see The next you I can't wait to see The next you Listen The next me is not I can't I'm not ready

I'll be ready in like The next ten years I think I don't think I want kids I think I'm all set Really? Yeah my girlfriend Wants kids like

Next year I can't I'm not doing it Who gonna have the baby? She gonna have the baby? I'm gonna tell you something It's like I understand that And a lot of

I hear that From a lot of women Especially like When you're young And you're career driven And I understand that But with all that With all the independence

And all the success you get I'm not saying that You need a kid That completes you Whatever But it is gonna be It'll be a transitional period And you're gonna

You may or you may not But I know a lot of women to get to the point like, okay, I've had a good life, I've spent a good life and I've been probably selfish

and for the business that we're in, being selfish drives you. Yeah. You know? I'm on stage by myself. Yeah, but it's going to be

a point where you're going to want to share that with something or someone other than yourself and that's where it's going to hit.

I'm just going to get a new betta fish. I've heard it all. I've heard it all before. I've heard it all before. I have two cats. Two cats. I've heard,

I know the cat bitch too. I know mama try to place anything yo I need two more dogs now give me a goldfish uh uh I'm gonna take a yoga class acupuncture

everything but I gotta I have a I know a female comic she's doing really well and she's she's up there

and she told us she was like you guys need to freeze your eggs so when you ready they'll defrost them eggs and you can have those babies and I was like

no I feel like frozen egg like that just sounds crazy my baby's gonna come out with one eye exactly it's gonna be no it's gonna come out

beautiful I'm telling you A frozen baby? Nothing is going to give you, this is me as a dad, and I see it in my lady. Nothing is going to give you that feeling other than that. So did you guys decide you guys were going to have a baby, or was it just like, oops? Well, I guess any time you have an unprotected sex, the decision is, yeah, yeah, I wanted to have a kid, and she wanted to give me a kid. And it's so funny because, like, you know, I believe in God.

I believe in God. God. Look at God, right? and we were like our situation we were we were pregnant I'm just

everything is weird we were pregnant and she was Stephanie was pregnant we got to three month period and she had a miscarriage oh and when she got pregnant

first thing I was like when she first got pregnant I was like look at God won't he do it yes he will yes he will I was on God

hard I was like yes you know and that pregnancy it started it didn't start off good the doctors told us that it was like

wasn't a good chance oh you know but me at my age like if you would tell me a 35 chance that sounds like 99 to me yeah for sure yeah and i'm like this let me get some we're gonna start juicing you know whatever i can do and we got to three three months and um we um had a miscarriage and as much as i was and when we had miscarriage i was like look i'm like god come on yeah i'm like why you know i didn't question god but you know i'm like because me i'm like i don't really be asking you for a lot god you know i'm saying like i'm not one of those people that ask god for everything in any situation like you know you some people like they ask god for everything they could be at a at a light it's about to turn red they'd be like god please get me through this life you

like i don't think you should call god for that right and then what i what i call god for you know he answered me by you know being able to have a baby and you know and that's what really lets you know the beauty and the blessing because it's not easy. People think it's that simple. Having a baby, it's a big deal. When you're younger, people splashing all over the place. People shooting up the club all over the place.

But then, that was three months. Then three months later, we got pregnant again. Oh, wow. Donnell, you're good. I was like, bang, bang, bang. I don't know how many swimmers,

but they strong it might not be your own tribe of them they persisting as hell but it was like and then we started the journey again and you know

you want to be nervous if you go I know there's a lot of women or people that listen to this that have that experience that will tell you having a baby

is not that easy you know what I'm saying it's like you have people out here that's spending a lot of money to give themselves an opportunity

that's why when I see like women or people that not necessarily don't plan it but don't take it serious I'm like Wait, who's not taking this serious? All these Real Housewives moms

These basketball wives Yeah, I mean, I know I mean, there's some women out here That get pregnant just so they could Get more money from the state Whatever, you know But you gotta realize It's a blessing

And it's a good thing How do you feel about White people adopting black babies? I'm asking for a friend I think that the most important thing In a baby's life Is to have a parent that cares and loves them and will do everything to give them the best chance in life and that could come in any

color that could come in any color that could come in that could come in two women you know i'm saying that could come in two guys like because kids don't know the difference until they get introduced to society and just society someone oh yeah you know she's taller than you we don't mess with you know i'm saying like it's not kids are evil yeah but kids don't know the all kids want is to be loved yeah you know one of my friends i know in atlanta she's um she's married lesbian she's married and um i was so happy for and i'm taking notes because listen help me out no no and like i was so happy like i've seen her go through transition like she's dating guys and she didn't find her happiness there and then she found her happiness

with this woman and you know and i was like so happy because she was happy yeah you know i mean And she was family, happy, content, and someone loved her. You know what I mean? Whether they had a penis or a vagina, she found the love. And I said, I mean, like, and I was like, because she had, she got dogs. She got dogs? Yeah, like she take care, white women take care of their dogs. No, white women don't.

I mean, she had a dog in the, you know, the wheelchair dogs? Oh, no. Yo, she had a dog. She had a wheelchair. Black people don't really get wheelchairs, right, dog? You better stay in the corner and sit. Oh, you already sit. But she had a wheelchair dog

And I seen her like Bring this dog from like Not being able to walk To walk again And I was like She has that nurturing Oh she rehabilitated Rehabilitated the dog

And I was saying to myself I was like I guarantee I was like They're going to have a baby You know they didn't have a baby They adopted a baby And my point is

They adopted a baby They got a Mexican baby Right Oh That's the new model That's the iOS 7 baby No they got a Mexican baby But that baby

Is going to be The happiest baby and that baby has made them the happiest couple. So to follow up on it, it doesn't matter. You would want people to take care of their own kids.

But if somebody wants to love and nurture a kid, you can't stop it. And what about discipline? How do you think you're going to be able to discipline yourself? You're going to squeeze his ear and drag him out of the store? Are you going to go pow pow, time out? You're going to squeeze his ear and drag him out of the store?

I'm saying this where everybody says it's not going to happen, I really want to be on the page where I could talk to him. Are you going to put him in timeout?

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, like, think about it. A beating only, a whipping only temporarily fixed the situation.

And then once a kid gets used to getting a beat and they're like, okay, once my ass don't hurt no more, I'm past it. But I think,

I just want to get to the point, hopefully I'll be able to do it, I don't know, get to the point where I can communicate communicate to him

and let him understand whatever you do, there's going to be consequences to it. We laugh at the idea of time out, but time out gives you a lot of time to think about what you just did. Really? I feel like time out is like, these kids don't understand time out. They're just in a corner.

All they want to know is what time do we get out of time out. Let me tell you what kind of time out. Time out, you don't just time out. You have to explain why, not just time out, Explain why you're suggesting or telling you time out, not just go time out. Let me tell you what the Haitian time out is.

My mom would make us all go on our knees and face different corners in the kitchen. And we would just face the wall for like 20 minutes. You better do it, mom. You know, when you're just on your knees, like, you're trying to, like, slouch. And my mom's like, you better stand up straight. And you're like, but I'm kneeling. I know that. I know this.

I know that I got a lot of beatings when I was younger. I don't I probably don't remember any of those beatings but I do remember more than anything is the lectures and my mom used to

like my mom used to give us options like she was like you want a lecture or you want I was like please beat me because I do not

want to hear you for another 45 minutes no I had the beating and the lecture because I was that was a setup I was raised by my

great aunt and great uncles so like they were so old that they when they were beating me I was like you beating me with

the dialysis cord what's going on I don't even feel that it's thick you can't even move it and they're just talking so I'm like man

I just don't want any of it at all and I think a lot of times beating are just like it's like I think sometimes parents it's their frustration

yeah I can't take it I got to do so what I'm going to do beat them and when I was growing up it was like I have two younger brothers

my youngest brother is a 10 year difference but it was like when one of us got in trouble we both got it yeah and i had a brother my other brother he's super smart he never got in trouble so he was snitching on y'all he always got a whooping mess with me you should have made him

you should have stopped him from doing it that's a lot of responsibility on one person i mean i get it you're the oldest you gotta get hit too but now if your son has a tantrum in public like if he just like throws his body on the ground and just starts flailing what do you do do you let him do that do you know he's already starting to do that like he's already doing a terrible two tantrums now and he's only a year and a half. I like,

this is what I look at, like, I don't let him do it, but I also know, like, anybody around it, if you know kids, you know

that's shit kids do. Yeah. They're really gonna do it. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're on a plane and somebody's like, oh,

why is that baby crying? Because it's a fucking baby, man. Yeah, what do you do about that? It's a baby on a plane. I'm like... No, we've traveled well.

You know what I'm saying? We've traveled well. You just try to, with kids, for the most part, you just try to their attention span is so short

you just gotta keep giving them different scenes you know and this is like a draw flying you know a lot of them it's because their ears

get clogged up whatever but um he's my son he's had it and like I know I can't he can't talk now

you know so I can't say he's getting used to the tone of my voice and everything but I gotta deal with the tantrum and just put him

in another situation where possibly stop pick him up you know what I'm saying like people are like why you always

pick that baby up You got a good back, though? You got a good family? I got a good back. You got a good core. That's how I got this baby, because I got a strong back. This back. Yeah, that's how I got that baby, that back.

You got to put your back into it. Your back in the back, though. Yeah, but I really, like, I talk to him now, even though I know we can't communicate, but he's getting used to the tone of my voice and everything. And I think you could talk to him. It's like you just have to communicate. What would you do, since he can't talk yet,

What would you do if somebody tried to kidnap your kid? Like, somebody just picked your kid up and was like... Like, what would you do? People are still doing that. Yeah, they're still taking babies. I mean, what I would do in that situation... Because your baby is cute. If they...

What you mean? People like all? No, like somebody... Kidnap? Like, somebody like America's Most Wanted grabbed your baby. Oh, then I'm... I mean... Somebody JonBenet Ramsey'd your baby.

That's an easy answer, isn't it? What you want to do? I don't... That's not even... I don't know. I just feel uncomfortable saying it, but if you try to harm my kid, then I'm going to harm you. That's the first instinct. Yeah, first instinct.

You have to do. I wanted to say kill right off the top. You know what I'm saying? We take this. We take kill. I don't even like that. The thought of that doesn't even make me feel good. Have you ever misplaced your baby?

Like you've been at the store and you left him in some cart somewhere and you're like, damn. No, I love this dude so much. I'm around him so much. That's not a moment that I don't know what's going on. Where he's at. Now, I know because he's walking now, but I know there's going to be a point where he's going to be all over the place. Yeah.

Like, even with that Cincinnati thing, right? The Cincinnati with the Harami? Oh, yeah, when the baby fell into the gorilla pool. Chappelle had a funny joke. He said, anybody that says that their family, they weren't good parents, aren't parents. He said, because if they say that, they don't know. He said, if my kid fell in a damn gorilla cave, he said, I wouldn't be surprised.

He'd be like, oh, god damn, my god damn son. Somebody shoot this god damn gorilla so I can get my baby. And he said, how are you going to call them bad parents when they was at the zoo? They was on a field trip. They was in a family outing. I've never been to the zoo with my family. My parents have never taken me outside. They wasn't taking me to the zoo.

My parents took me to church and Pathmark. That's it. It was one of them two places. That's hilarious. is yeah my i will say this when i was growing up my mom not my dad not being my mom would we had no money anything that was free my mother we did a free museum a free concert she she always took us out and and gave us some culture my family didn't like free like people giving they didn't like free getting free food yeah no they were like no man i was very proud no my mom was the

same way but i'm just talking about activities like if they have like a not like yo go to a store where you can get a free loaf of bread. I'm talking about like a free outdoor concert where like everybody was getting a free. You know, we want free. Oh, that's the us besides more? More. I love

that line. Every time I hear somebody ask for something else, I'm like, more? What about this is my what I'm scared of is like holding babies. It's terrifying. They're really squirmy. You drop that baby, that baby's all messed up.

Their head's so soft. It is. But like I say, and that's easy. I mean, I understand that with someone else's baby. But I'm sure, again, we're going back. I want to get y'all pregnant so bad. No. No, we're going back.

On the podcast? No, no, no. They never had no podcast like that. Stephanie. That's what I'm saying. But when it's yours, I feel the same way. But when it's yours, it's just an extra connection. I would just hold him too tight.

I would be like, oh, my God. Is that how women can have on heels and carry their baby? Because I watch them, and I'm like, yo, you not scared? Like, your ankle's going to just twist a little bit? Yeah, but older women don't like that. I don't like it either. My ankles are not strong enough. My mother got mad at my lady because she was like, you know,

mom's always like, she got that baby with them heels on. Was she wearing a wedge? Huh? Come on, man. It worked out. It's your wife, right? Oh, soon to be. Soon to be?

You're engaged? Yeah. Oh, my goodness. I'm a hood engaged I'm a hood engaged I told you we were going to do it Stop bothering me But I know I'm going to get married

How long were you guys together? Three years Three years I feel like that's a good enough time No, I was in a relationship for three years Oh yeah, she was She just mad at everything You want a hug?

You want a hug? You want a hug? No Sometimes people don't know how to ask for hugs She don't want it She don't want the hug He wanted me to move in And I was like, I don't think we're ready.

I was like, you live in a walk-up. I got to, like, move all my crap in here. And then if we break up, I got to move all my stuff back down. I was like, no. That's the next step, Marie. We broke up. You are fearful of commitment. Oh, I am.

Three years is a long time to be with somebody. And everything he wanted from me was, like, realistic. I just was like, I don't know. I'll just tell you this. I'll tell you this. as we get older in life and we look back you're at an age

where you can you know you can roll the dice like that but there's always one where you'd be like hmm but again

mentally I don't think he was a hmm it was like you know what that was gonna happen there was definitely there's somebody else out there definitely

this is my first boyfriend I was like oh yeah yeah yeah that's just that's smash and dash you know that's it was a three year smash and dash

but he was also ten years older than me so we were in different places Yeah, but you still, I'm a lot older than my lady, but you know, it all depends on what you want and like how you get on. Nobody can really dictate or how, what, or this relationship is supposed to be like that. Yeah, but it was like with me, like, I don't know what I want. Like every day I would wake up and I want to do. Yeah, but it's like me talking, like, I'm almost like, like this, like you were a kid, you know?

So I didn't expect, you know, especially, and I see what you're doing now and just like briefly knowing you, You're like, there's certain things you want out of life, and you can't lock a person down. No, not at all. You got to get those weak women that don't have no ambition, no drive. Them the ones that you marry. No, I'm joking. No, I'm here for that.

What you want to do with your life? Oh, da, da, da, da. I got you, boo. No, different strokes for different folks. Yeah, my girlfriend, I feel like she's one of those people that's like, she understands what I'm doing, but at the same time, it's like, no, but I want to hang out. I want to be with you on the weekends.

Like, you know, you don't have to go to that show. And they live together. And you're like, wait, what? Like, no. She's accommodating. She's accommodating because the rent be late on my side. Like, she's not accommodating to what I'm doing. Like, I'm doing comedy and I have to be out late.

And she's like, no, you know, you got to come home. Oh, so you got Sidney on a curfew. Oh, yeah, no, no, that's going to be an issue. If they stressing you on comedy, you're going to have a problem. Because that's going to be the thing. I'd be dashing out of diners like, yo, I'm like 20 minutes late with the diner plate. my advice she's got to be

more understanding with that because like our business it's a I mean you can control it but you know

you have a good set you have some people that can make a difference or you've been having to create if you can't like there's no curfew to that

you know what I'm saying there's no curfew to that she be dashing out to Adrian did you hear that Donald Rollins said I gots to stay out

she not gonna listen to this but the thing is like ultimately do you trust me enough to understand that it's all good and

and that's where you're going to meet like mine that's where you're going to meet people that are like you you know what I mean it's like comics I mean you could probably

try to break it but comics don't you just like yo let's get together sometimes let's get together for lunch whatever but that's when it happens you know like

you know what I'm saying a lot of comics we know don't have no money for lunch they be like you want to get together they be like you want to get together and write together

and I be like no no oh yeah that was my that was foreplay for me yeah you know I think we should have a writing session

I didn't know you was pulling out that pen a writing session or like a sketch and you're like why is your sketch in this bedroom what's going on

it's like the players club you feel like Ebony at Junior's bachelor party or whatever so we are going to give you a quick quiz to test your expertise I feel like you're going

to get a lot of this right you're so brand new at it and you're so fresh yeah I feel like you're learning a lot yeah you gotta put those

glasses on hold on sweet potatoes yes it is sweet potatoes i mean it looks like sweet potatoes or mustard or something it is wow that was great and the next one i already know what that one is yeah we already know it's he picked all the obvious stuff pumpkin pumpkin no it's carrots is it yeah let me smell it look like it tastes it smells like pumpkin I don't know what pumpkins smell like

Sidney ripped all the Sidney ripped all the things off So you filled one you got one So you got one point right now You want to try one more I don't know I should know my pal is

oh I feel like I don't know is that one a fruit yes a fruit is that apple or pear no it's peaches oh peaches blend

real ugly yeah yeah they don't look peaches blend disgusting no peaches no I didn't get that I know damn you out here

failing Donal what's going on I don't eat baby I don't eat baby food I mean I don't eat it either I don't eat baby food I know you don't want nothing to do with no baby food yeah you know why because she's like you get baby food you gotta

have a baby with it well i know a lot of mothers who like taste the stuff and like chew it up in their mouth and put it in the baby's mouth so i mean that's why i thought that maybe you were one of those people no i don't do all that no i don't do all that and then he was he was nursing he was breastfeeding for like a year like a year three months he's been getting that that breast milk for a while does he his teeth now though right yeah so is he what is he is he eating like cheerios Are you the dad that has, like, the bag full of Cheerios and, like, baby carrots and stuff? Yeah, he eats Cheerios. He eats regular food.

Whatever I do, I, like, chop it up, like, really good. You know, no, like, no season or anything like that. No season. We can't do that. No Larry's. No Larry's on it. No Old Bay or none of the smushed carrots or nothing? Not for my kids.

I just put her on the Old Bay, so she wants to put Old Bay on everything. I just try to do his food with, like, herbs and, like, lemon and stuff like that. I don't try to keep him away from all the bad things that I used to eat. Okay. so i have a question for you i think that um so do you have any questions more questions for the quiz i have one more oh okay well go ahead so go ahead no i don't i'm gonna look at my phone okay uh what advice do you have for dudes who got the car seat in the back seat trying to holler at a woman like me walking down the street what advice do you have for the dude that's like hey

mama and then i look and i'm like is that is that a car seat grow up that's my advice just to grow up you know i'm saying some people like you know you just can't change it but it's the time to it just grow up or if you don't grow up at least put the car seat in the trunk like i do like i do like i do just put it in the trunk it's so funny because stephanie be like just why is the baby sitting in the trunk i was like because i want to still act like i still got it you know you tell her that huh you tell her straight up yeah i mean what's wrong with being That's funny. I'm with it.

I'm with it. Yo, you can't be uptight. You know what I'm saying? You can't be uptight. Ew. Is that a car seat for a baby? He can be like, yo, this is my cousin's baby. This is my cousin's car.

Oh, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. It's so funny. Yeah, I would just either grow up or just put the car seat in the back. You hear that, guys? Put the car seat in the trunk. Yeah, put it in the trunk. I hope you have a big enough trunk to put a car seat in it. Yeah, most car seats fit in the back.

I feel like Toyota and Hyundai have really short and not big enough trunks. It's a car seat, not a wheelchair. How big is a car seat? I feel like it's the same. And the last question is, you're on a flight from Ibiza with you, your soon-to-be wife, and your son. Your son is crying the entire eight hours. What do you do for all the people on the plane? um i don't i don't i don't do anything i don't care you know what i'm saying it's like i'm don't

i don't care it's a kid now if it was like i wasn't making an attempt to try to calm him down or anything that'd be one thing is like i don't i would make every effort to calm him down but if i can't it is what it is it is what it is you know i mean one time i was on the on a flight and the mother had bought like everybody in her row like some drinks right oh that's it if i was sitting behind her i'd be like i can hear your baby too you just you're just so against everything about a baby i don't want no part of that baby like you only want to play with a doll baby like uh-uh that uh-uh that's gonna that's gonna get me warmed up i'm not ready for that donnell is gonna find somebody for you marie and uh try to somebody would workshop in his trunk he's trying

to workshop this girl listen if you could tell anything to your younger self like if you say something to like donnell from like 20 years ago what would you say like what advice would you give yourself about like just fatherhood um or fatherhood or just whatever advice if i would go back 20 years of my life i would tell myself and i did tell myself this 20 years ago stay focused you know i mean don't get distracted stay away from negative negative energy and always uh and just remind yourself that things are going to get better if you put the work in to make them

better. That's what I say to myself. Yo, 20 years ago was 1997. Do y'all realize that? 20 years ago, that's when I first started doing comedy. Wow. Wow. Yeah. Now she's trying to do the numbers and shit. Okay. You're probably getting close. You're getting close.

No, I'm just trying. We've been doing it like three, four years. Yeah. Come on, baby. I know. We're fresh in here, but you know we're doing what we can you gotta go hard my advice go hard or go home

and I mean just on the comedy side I always have young comedians they always come and say do you have any advice you would give a young comedian I was like yep don't ask for any advice

because what people try to do is like you can take shortcuts but the thing that's gonna be that give you your best learning curve is do more stage time and I know you guys

have heard it before perform, perform, perform, perform and then you don't have to ask a lot of questions if it's a favorite comic you like or somebody you appreciate

just like study Like, just, you know, you don't want to be them, but just see how the best people that do it, do it. And watching somebody in their greatness is very motivating. Yeah. Do you remember the worst set, the worst bomb you've ever had? I don't bomb a lot. Oh, you didn't hear that? Yeah, but in 1998, you were a bomber?

No, I wasn't a bomber. I never bombed. I mean, I never was a bomber. I would have a, now this may sound crazy. Bad set, but not bombing. Like, bomb, like, like, like. No laughs. I never was, like, no laughs.

I never was not funny. I was never not engaging. Right, right. You know what I'm saying? Like, I've had situations where, like, say, the mic is messed up. Yeah. The sound, it's just something that contributed to me not having a good set. But I've just never been a person that, like, I took some hits.

Yeah, do you remember the worst set you've ever had? Or the worst time you've ever had on stage? I don't remember the worst time I've ever had on stage, but I do remember one moment, and I was all excited about it. I thought it was super funny, and I learned the lesson. It was this gay guy in the audience, and he started heckling me, and we were going back and forth, and what I did was I attacked his sexuality, and he embraced his sexuality, and he didn't care.

So he took the weapon I thought I could use against him and used it against me, and he had the coldest laugh I've ever heard. He said, yeah, I might be gay. He said, but I'm more man than you'll ever be and more woman than you will ever get. And look, when he said that, I was like, okay, good night, everybody. But the funny thing about it was like, I took it, I was like this, I was like, I was like Ronda Rousey in that last fight. But the funny thing about it, maybe like seven years later, and I had started getting some, you know, a moderate amount of success. and and and i ran into him right and and he just said you don't remember me and you remember him

right away yo suzy said especially with that tone he was like he said you don't remember me i was like yes i do and i was like that was probably like one of the funniest moments and like revealing moments i've ever had in my career he was like yo man i'm so excited to see what you've been doing man and keep up the good work you guys are like besties now that's great that's beautiful i feel like you you've answered all the questions you're obviously an expert at being a new dad who knows kind of what he's doing because you're learning while you're doing it you're doing a good job i think you're doing a great job oh i know i'm doing i'm doing for this where can people catch you i mean i know that you're in the city regularly have your show some stuff yeah i think the easiest way

is to go to donnell rollins my website you know you can google me like if you want to find out almost anything everything about me you google me you're gonna find out some some interesting things but you can if you're trying to find me you can catch me on on just i'm out there and project dad is that is there going to be another season i'm not sure we only had uh the deal was only for one season okay it'll be interesting like i i'm really excited about doing something else with my son because when he was on project that he wasn't walking he was crawling and now like he's gonna go through some milestones in his life like talking and all these other things and i think that um and he's starting to develop his personality i think like he's funny and

interesting now. They should do a spin-off. They should just do a whole show of you. And I don't want to like, I don't want to like, I don't want to force him into it, but it's something

that's so close to me and I love it. You know what I mean? It's just like, you know, I would like for him to do something. Comedy related? Comedy.

Like, I just want him to be funny. Funny. You know what I'm saying? Like, funny doctor, funny lawyer or whatever. You should start. But I just, I mean,

I enjoyed working with, that's so funny to say working with him, but just, you know, I was making money and chilling with myself. I can't beat that. Did he get a check as well?

He got a check through me. No, I can't. But he has his work permit and whatever. He's going to get that money. He got his working papers? Man, listen. Yeah, he's doing it. Like, he's going to, I look at it like, if it's something that he enjoys and if I could

make it, like, fun for him, not like a job, and as long as he's having fun with it and it's expanding his imagination, whatever, I'll do it. But the minute I feel like he's like, oh, dad, get out of here with that, then I won't push it. But I would love to be able to share some joke stories and teach him to trade. that's beautiful and i feel like that's what we're gonna do thank you that was awesome we have a show every second saturday of the month at karma lounge called the warm-up yep hosting that and then we have our unofficial expert page on instagram and you can just add us let us know

that you love the episode subscribe i can't wait just like this yo it's unofficial but i'm pregnant that's gonna be sydney it'll be my cats my cats will be pregnant freaky as hell uh give it up one more time for donald rollins thanks for having me guys