MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - "The Sexy Expert" with Sweet Lorraine

Episode Date: July 14, 2017

Syd & Marie talk with Burlesque pro Sweet Lorraine of NYC to talk about all things SEXY!----Listen to The Unofficial Expert Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus:https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus----BONUS EPISODES AVAILABLE NOW ON PATREON:www.patreon.com/TheUnofficialExpertBUY UNOFFICIAL EXPERT MERCH:https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-unofficial-expert-podcastFOLLOW THE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT:https://www.instagram.com/UnofficialExpertFOLLOW SYDNEE:https://www.instagram.com/JustSYDbwhttps://twitter.com/justsydnycFOLLOW MARIE:https://www.instagram.com/Reeezyhttps://twitter.com/MsReeezyFOLLOW ANDREW:https://www.instagram.com/mcgui_guyTHE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT IS A FOREVER DOG PODCASThttps://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/the-unofficial-expertSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

hello hello hello ah welcome to the unofficial expert podcast with sydney and marie wow that was that was real radio announcer oh my goodness i was so excited and marie very morning radio show fm style yakum sakum sakum nakum jakum uh what's going on marie how you feeling you're looking glorious and glistening and whatnot oh that means i'm sweating uh no i'm doing really well i feel i feel good you know when you feel good you look good you look good you feel good yes i feel like you know we had an awesome show on saturday we sure did thanks to everybody who came through oh it was bomb we're so freaking spoiled yeah the audience was they looked good they were laughing i feel like when we say this some of y'all don't believe us but we have the sexiest

audience in all of new york city comedy i know i asked i was like how'd you guys hear about the show this is not a meetup this is not cupid.com like people were dressed people had their people got shape-ups people make sure that their edges were laid with baby toothbrushes people had their best church shoes on it was crazy their best eyebrow stencils out for us it was a good show it was awesome i'm so happy don't forget to come to our last show august 12th at karma lounge at 7 30 it's gonna be packed make sure you have your best romp him on make sure that romp him is laid make sure them edges is laid as well make sure you got deodorant on also because it's hot down it'd be dank dank and stink are you talking about me right now because i don't have any deodorant

on how do you not have deodorant on it's 80 something degrees outside well i was a victim to uh someone stealing my deodorant okay if you're stealing deodorant you are going through through it boo you could go to the 99 cent store and get you some dove you could get the travel size for like 50 cents yeah yeah i could do that i've been without deodorant for three days i was like until my deodorant turns up i'm not buying it so you're holding all of our noses you can go to the 99 cent store and get a 50 cent deodorant i said i'm waiting for it to show up because it was kind of new aka it was old it literally was at the end of it was like the end of the road you know how when you get to the end and it like the whole thing crumbles oh yo half of it was gone

so whoever took it i was like bitch you're going true it crumbs just just dropping the deodorant crumbs in there yo and then like half of it fell out so i packed it back in yes yes and then i scraped some of it off so it could look brand new again so it wouldn't look dirty that deodorant was great as fuck yo you michelangelo'd you i sure did i forgot the fuck out of that dove and it was the cucumber cool like the green the green top whoever stole my deodorant i hope you fall down one flight of stairs one step twisting ankle uh speaking of twisting ankles uh what were you an expert in this week i was not an expert at twisting ankles how about how about i twist that around and ask you what you were an expert in this week oh my

god i was an expert in karma uh what an expert in karma i feel i really do believe if you put good energy out there you're gonna get good energy back i try to be a good person 88.887 percent of the time okay so that's a lot of time yeah so um sometimes like there'll be tip buckets going around and i'll throw money in even though i'm on the show so i'm pretty much getting my money back so i was on this show on sunday and it was packed and it was like a backyard uh like barbecue well it was white people so it wasn't really a barbecue but it was a storytelling show and there was food or whatever and potato salad what kind of food was there i'm not gonna say there's cucumbers and corn yeah it was a lot of vegetables a lot of dry it wasn't dry but

costco plate no no it wasn't it was everybody brought it was like a potluck kind of thing people were bringing random stuff a lot of cultural food i was there was like some greek stuff like a greek hummus like a no greek dessert i don't know what it's called uh yogurt no bitch it's something else it's like got nuts in it or something i don't know anyway i'll look it up later um but there was like mixed peas it was it was great it was awesome i had a good time um so there was a tip bucket up top before the show even started they like the money goes to the comedians blah blah so people were putting money in but i wasn't even i didn't even look in i just put ten dollars that's what this is nice she spent money on food did you eat any of the food i did

not oh okay so you just threw ten dollars i just threw it sydney doing real well yeah sydney is my The richest friend. I threw it in there, you know, just giving, just passing it forward or paying it forward. And so, you know, the show was great. I did well, you know, but I had to leave. I left, like, maybe right before it ended. And I emailed her, like, thank you. The show was great.

This was so much fun. You know, keep whatever money I have that you were going to give me because, you know, you put together this great thing and it's in your backyard or whatever. And it looked like you paid for them brand new lights. She writes me back. She's like, you did great. i'm so glad that you came blah blah blah it's way too much money for me to keep and then she told me the number and i was like yo you're not gonna tell us the number no i don't want people

knowing that i have money like that that they know you have money because you threw ten dollars in a bucket for food you did you already snitched on yourself it was like the most money i've made from like uh just a stand-up comedy show well a storytelling show it was real i was like oh my gosh she's like you want me to write you a check or you want to come i was i'm gonna come get that cash i don't need that chick i like uh that show i've done that show before that lady doesn't live that far from here no and it's really nice the first time i did the show i put the address in my phone and then i got off the bus and i was like it's a house yeah it's a real house people gonna kill me and then i went in and she's got this huge living room and it was packed yeah it

was oh she did in her little room in the house her backyard was beautiful it almost felt like i wasn't in new york it was really really nice yeah it was like you know it was it was nice it was very nice i'm trying to also learn how to not say too much on this podcast because i've been getting in trouble cindy's been telling all her bitch i've been getting in trouble on the podcast so no more of that i'm gonna be nice nice nice nice nice i'm saying nothing but good oh that's i'm glad that you said that because we did say we wanted to say that uh even though i'm still gonna be me me me me me i'm still gonna steal stuff from the store okay and i'm still not gonna get up when pregnant ladies get on the train i'm gonna pretend to be sleeping anyway so i uh i'm happy that you

got i mean is it karma though i feel like it's karma if you put money in the bucket and you got money back you would have had ten dollars less if you hadn't put money in the bucket yo but i paid it forward yo i feel like it was like a bank like i put it in and then like over two hours i made more than that what's the what's the bible song the church song like if you tithe it'll come back press down shake you got you know no i don't know what that's shaking together i don't know what that is you put you put it and then god will give it back to you overflowing uh-huh pressed down shaking together okay thank you marie are you have you found your expertise this weekend okay what is it so much for letting me uh figure out what it is this week

i was an expert at uh doing comedy shows not saying that i'm killing comedy shows i'm just doing a variety of different types of shows okay right so i did a show on the roosevelt island trum tram i don't know how you say that word my mom says trum uh tram which is like a floating elevator that goes from one end of new york to some little ass raggedy island on the other side have you ever been to roosevelt island i have oh was that when you had the threesome yes i did no that would have been amazing about if i knew about the tram you took a tram i did not i did i did not know about the tram that would have been perfect how did you get there y'all swam oh listen somebody had an suv we got over there classy but the way i left man so many transfers

i felt like i had to swim back it was messy dude tram to a threesome that's that's something that i would watch uh so we did a show two girls one tram i mean it was two girls one dude in a trail oh okay yeah you're right the dude who was driving the tram oh my god so really it's an orgy floating in the sky um so we did this show it was in the middle of the day yesterday so if you've never been on the train and i'd never been on it and i i'm not somebody who likes to perform floating above the bridge and but they paid me for it and i was like yeah yeah i'll take that money uh i did not give them ten dollars i just took the money and uh left but i uh you're performing for all these tourists it's like kids it's the middle of the day they're they're not warmed up it's like

you get it's four minutes to get from one side to the other so you have four minutes and you know i'm long-winded as hell oh me too so i'm up there like hey guys y'all speak english and like people were clapping people weren't clapping people had their phones in my face this lady was watching a video on her snap like it was a lot going on happening but i had to do it four times so i bombed four times oh i oh i talked to somebody about it and she was like yo everybody did bad i don't know if they're gonna do it again it was it was bad she's like well we got that money though Yeah, they gave us cash. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

They gave us straight up cash. And then I did a comedy show, like a variety show. I was the comic that went up first. And it was like a bunch of like old people. And it was like a lot of like fluid people in there. So I was like, oh, they should like me. Fine. You know, I check a couple boxes.

I'm black and a woman and I'm stunning. And they don't like none of those boxes that I checked. What? You went up there mad confident? Like, look at all you dusty ass white people. i went up there just like were you there that's basically how i started uh the show was about rebranding and we were supposed to come in as characters and i said i didn't know we were supposed to come back as characters i feel like i'm perfect the way i am so i showed up like this

and that's how i started and they were like no no but honestly if you would have came with that hair and everything you got going on they could have thought that was a character no they were like this this negress is too confident for us uh where's the sad black girl that's the one that we probably want um but uh so i did that show i was on stage for like 10 11 minutes they didn't give me a light i just had to wrap myself up yeah what's up with these people not wrapping people like no lights i did a show no lights messy for y'all who are not comedians uh we will just keep it going to know when we have one or two minutes left to wrap up and a lot of people like they don't produce comedy shows properly so they just they assume that we just know when to stop i don't

know how long any of my material no and if i'm doing well oh definitely not getting off bitch i will do a comedy central one hour special okay oh if you don't like me listen so you know and then i did a show i did a really good show uh the wyatt senac show last night went well so you know that's my uh that's my uh expertise this week just bombing and uh in the sky and bombing in the sky for our love all right speaking of our love oh my god we have an out freaking standing guest today and we love her oh you were first of all the guest is glowing right now the glow is just i can't even see i don't think that y'all are ready for the glow Well, first of all, she is a friend of ours.

She produces a great show once a month, Shades of Burlesque, at Come On, Everybody, Please Go. It's the only all-black burlesque show. Only one. So you must go. You must pay all your coins. She is our sexy expert. Give it up for sweet Lorraine. Hey, y'all.

Hey, Lorraine. Girl, you came here with a dark-ass lip for us? Yeah, just a casual. You threw on a winter lip for the summertime? oh wow you got all the cleavage out yes dude you look fantastic your bra straps are clean oh i hate a bitch with a dirty bra strap and you got on a velvet skirt sis with you know how sexy you have to be to and the slick goes all the way i can see uh your fallopian tubes i feel like the slit is all the way your uterus just waved at me hey girl hey sis uh you're a snatch you're

populating just so you know yeah uh so is it hard to be sexy hmm um here's the thing i don't really think of myself as sexy and she said that she threw her bang over she sure did she and she batted her eyes she she rolling uh you're so humble i i really don't i really don't i feel like uh it's like daytime drag for me you know like you can put on lots of things you can put on your business professional look you can put on your so this is not a costume this is like yeah this is a great look i feel like i stepped into this cat eye you stepped into a cat i stepped into a cat eye but i stepped into the sexy well let me tell you i stumble into a cat eye and i fall down into sexy so you are doing it so well when i do a cat eye it don't even be balanced

me a few years to get comfortable with a cat eye the cat eye and um embracing the sensuality that let's take a step back what is sexy to you actually i'm gonna ask you that i feel we should all yeah what's sexy to us what's sexy to me doesn't matter woman man trans whoever like the confidence your confidence in yourself to one do what you want to do because i feel like we get all these messages like from our parents from society like you need to get a degree and do this yeah go into corporate america and that's the only way you can be successful right you know i got that message many of us got that message um but as an artist you're like well damn what does this mean if i'm if i don't want to take that path yeah um

and then just saying you know what fuck it i'm gonna be me i'm gonna do the things that i love yeah um that is sexy i mean i'm also gonna do all the things i love and be poor uh that's not sexy as an artist but so you're right you don't not to be poor you don't sleep on um on a futon or a cot or anything or an air mattress you don't have a bunk bed do you no i don't have a bunk bed so you got a full bed full well a queen because a full is basically a twin so you got i hope you got a queen full is not a twin it is a twin no it is a grown-up twin listen you know what i don't even know why i'm arguing with you i've been sleeping on a queen-size bed since 2007 so i'm doing well she got a full bed yeah so i think that's confident that's what's sexy that's what's

Sydney what is uh Sydney what is sexy to you sexy to me is like when you walk out and you just have the light like your light is so strong it doesn't matter what the hell you got on you could have on like some sweatpants or you could have the nicest like suede or velvet skirt with a high slit it doesn't matter just soon as you walk out everybody's like yo it's something about her she's fucking outstanding i think that's sexy like you it doesn't matter what you're wearing what you're doing everybody wants to look at you because you're glowing you're glowing within maybe people are looking at you because your skirt is tucked into your panties no because you got something in your teeth no i mean people can look at you for a number of reasons no but maybe you're being loud

on the train no you've never been on a train and it'll be that one person that like literally everybody's like yo what the fuck are you taking the train for i'm sure people look at you sometimes oh i was about to say that's me every time i go on the train people look at you and sometimes when i'm like you you're too cute to be poor down here with us when i'm when i'm dressed up like when i have like a little wedge on and a romper and i come down looking clean they're like why are you down here with uh with the homeless folks with the commoners yeah you deserve to be in an uber like that's what it is i feel like sexy is just you know having that ray of light that people can't stop looking at well i feel like sometimes i'll be on the train or i'll be out and

i'll see somebody who's so attractive that i can't stop looking at them yes and it's always like i'm sorry i'm sorry it's always like a woman too like it'll be yeah some like really attractive chick and i'd be like i'm not even gay but sick i'm not even gay i mean i am but like not gay like like you just say you're not even i am gay but i just feel like i'm not attracted to every woman but i can be honest and be like damn you look so good i can i can uh appreciate something that's beautiful yeah yes right but at the same time like when i'm on the train or i'm out and people won't stop looking at me i'd be so annoyed i'd be like oh my god well i don't want people looking at me because i don't want them to get into me too much because then when you start looking too

much is then you catch them corns on the side and then like i didn't i didn't draw my eyebrows all away and like i've got a patch a patch missing on the side of my head like i don't want people to look get into it but i mean i'm sure people stare at you all the time sweet lorraine like you're in burlesque you always dress you look great like you have amazing features have you always been because you said it took you a while to get into your sensuality and everything how how did you get into like how did you find the sex yeah help us oh my gosh well you know it's so ironic because for the majority of my life i was called ugly like every single day they were Like, you were the ugliest person I've ever seen.

And so, you know, if somebody's saying that to you every single day, especially when you're... Who was saying that to you? Do you think it's because you were dark-skinned? I think it was a dark-skinned thing. I don't think it was anything about your features. It was definitely a dark-skinned thing. I grew up down south in Jacksonville, Florida. That is like...

I'm glad you made it out, sis. Anything with a vil. Yeah, I made it out. I made it out. Anything with a vil is not where you want to be. It's not where... Anything with a vil is full of villain. yeah boom if you live in a bill i'm sure they're calling everybody niggers yeah i mean you heard

that all the time you heard um get out of the sun i'm like it's florida everywhere there is sun yeah yeah i don't even have real trees that give shade exactly so so much of that so i was really under the impression that i was not an attractive woman although my sisters my mom like they are absolutely gorgeous i was like oh my gosh i just really want to look like pictures yeah these beautiful women um i do have some you can show that sure later later and does your mother have an instagram no she doesn't she does it janice janice janice hey janice janice does not have instagram but um she did at the real janice at just janice come on she would love that oh my but she definitely like they all had personality they were all beautiful they're all hilarious

women and i was like damn like did that just skip me and then um i don't know and then i saw them like putting on their beauty and like they're really feminine women they they like to dress they like the makeup they they have a shoe that matches the bag that matches the belt yes bitch color coordinated down technically i am the boy of the family because i'm like what's your signature scent i don't believe that signature scent yeah like they have a signature scent like i don't think that i have a signature scent but i love things that smell good yeah and i used to have vanilla man that smells good vanilla used to be my scent for a minute anything with vanilla in it i'm here for that amber romance from victoria's secret i had that all of college in all my early

20s yes i did the body splash and the cream the body cream yes yes yes but i think you have a signature scent yeah but i mean now of course they're just like you step into your womanly self especially because i ran track for most of middle school high school so i didn't develop until um almost junior year in high school so i had no boobs no hips no anything same same same except still same and it was so crazy because my sister would tease me she was like it doesn't matter which way you turn your front is your back your front is your back quandrica quandrica well we know quandrica on the ground oh my god quandrica she goes by quand quandrica so bad that's like a spice or something like a seasoning or something like that you got

some turmeric and some quandarica yes paprika oh my gosh yo my mom went in she went in with the names she sure did can you tell us all the names because janice did quandarica she did quandarica uh-huh and then my legal name is quite interesting we're not gonna uh put me out there okay okay but what's the rest of the siblings names uh jasmine jerry renard and jasmine yeah that's not that bad it's not that bad she said renard renard wow that's that's an interesting one we just we just she was really trying to make sure he get a job renard yeah she wasn't so concerned about the first not at all um okay okay so but yeah so you develop your boobs junior high everything developed and then as soon as the body developed

everybody just started treating me differently like there was there were rumors that i got breast implants and i was like hey uh y'all know i'm poor right like we live in the same neighborhood at what point do you think my mom spent money on breast implants for me instead of books anyway yeah um so it is crazy though because i feel like every high school or junior high school has that rumor like you go like the chick be flat-chested and then we all come back after of the summer and you just got boobs and people like she'd be stuck in her bra like every it's true i used to have a rumor like that i used to pee people hard like i would be tracking them like watching a bra like okay it looked fuller today like it was your period like what's going

on it wasn't teachers there were teachers there were students the teachers were talking about your boo they were talking they should have got fired on the spot oh my gosh it was just it was pretty hellish so um i wasn't as comfortable i obviously wasn't comfortable right in my body because i had all of this negativity around it right so anyway long story short went off to college had my four years to like do me what that mean that means you were or you were in that dorm room you were in that quad giving it up you were throwing it back you were throwing it back you were at the vending machine getting condoms showing people your new I lived in an all-girls dorm, so you were still throwing it back, though.

It was a lot of blahs going on. A lot of lavender oil. None of that is happening. So you didn't have any sex in college? I did. I eventually had sex. Eventually? When I was 19.

Okay. Okay. 19. That's a reputable age. That's later than me, but good for you. Sydney, you were like 12. Shut up. everybody was later than you but yes i felt like um it was florida we didn't have a dress code like

a lot of other colleges have dress codes i went to a liberal arts private university and um i was like hey i'm gonna cut slits in all my jeans in the back and so they all look like chaps and i wore no just like right under the butt cheek girl where were you going i don't i was just like i'm feeling myself i had abs for the first time in life um i don't know i was just like really into into the look yeah i feel like whatever time i don't know how old you are so but i'm gonna assume whatever time you were in people were experimenting and doing them and they you know they have like cross colors so rude but you know back back in the 60s everybody was they experimented with uh race race and stuff shut up back in the 70s they were

in the 80s everybody was doing cracks you're so stupid she always started shit sweet lorraine don't listen to her not a youth though not a youth you look like a youth though um okay so finally finally uh i was pretty comfortable with with being sensual like with people acknowledging it and um admiring it admiring it and whatnot and i was like okay sometimes it would still make me feel uncomfortable then and then when i finally officially officially stepped into the sexy was uh after i moved to new york came to brooklyn i saw all the beautiful black and brown people and i was like oh my gosh this is where i want to be yeah um and then of course i stumbled upon the poetry scene because who doesn't and so you were doing spoken word i was doing love jones

oh my gosh and then the entire like a huge huge community a huge group of the women on the poetry scene not knowing that i'm as gay as the day is long thought that i was coming to the poetry scene to steal their men and so they all started writing all these poems about me and i was like well wait how are you gonna be shady with the poem yes here here women we gotta do better we gotta do better here come the poem uh slithering snake black queen i think not she want what i got pretty much that's all that's how it was and i was like you know what this this is terrible you all talk about how you want to empower women empower each other and then the the one moment you see somebody that you're obviously um threatened by threatened by you

You were new, you had body, face. Also, your ass was out in them jeans. Shut up. They were like, uh-uh, uh-uh, she's trying to take my man. You know, I don't understand how you can talk about women being strong and you have on boom-boom shorts. And I was just like, well, I don't know that term because I just came from Jacksonville, Florida.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, the Daisy Dukes I have on, what does that have to do with what I'm saying? like you have on no bra and a sheer shirt exactly but i'm not calling you out on that because that's how you felt you felt like i look good in this i want to come in this was happening wearing sheer shirts yes no bra shout out to all the ladies with big boobs not wearing a bra like girl you doing a lot dangerous i saw a girl a woman a woman with her boobs were so big it was her entire torso and she had no bra on yesterday like her boobs were like she said i am doing me

what or she could not more power to you but yeah so after that i was like you know what every single scene that i'm getting into is preaching this message about how inclusive they are except if you have any ounce of sensuality to you um because like i said at that point i still wasn't um as comfortable okay um you were working your way yeah i was working my way towards it and i was like you know what if people are going this crazy oh they can't wait they can't take you when you really know who you are i was like when they're going this crazy over just how i am just walking into a room right now and some casual shit how about i really tap into this like how about i really tap into the power that is my sexuality that's the scariest thing for some

people for somebody to walk in and know who they are and they're confident like that is scary a woman who doesn't know her worth like people prey on that they hope that they can catch somebody that knows nothing about them because then they're like oh i can break you down but you come in and you're like i know what i'm doing i know what i have well the same way confidence is attractive to us and to most people yeah uh people who aren't confident other people find that attractive you know what i mean like because they can prey on that exactly and they can like use that uh like their advantage but like you were like nah i'm gonna do it i'm gonna be as sexy as i can be is that when you started doing burlesque um oh you started stripping what was you doing

well stripping came a little later oh you did some of that too yes okay okay so we're gonna yeah hit like tell us the difference between stripping and burlesque right away okay okay let's define this burlesque is the art of the striptease so any burlesque dancer who's like i'm not a stripper you haven't done one ounce of history or reading or research at all because all of the legends all the burlesque legends were strippers we are stripping you are taking off articles of clothing so wait is burlesque college for strippers no burlesque is so stripping and storytelling okay at the same time and then um or it could just be like bump and grind striptease sensual acts it can be uh lots of things and then whereas stripping there are

different strip club stripping that we know is absolutely it's different in the in terms of you give lap dances you are there to create some sort of fantasy the costumes are different the boundaries that you set up are different like when you're doing burlesque there's a stage audience comes to pay to see you when you're at a strip club they throw in sack of chewie's at your face you're you're hoping that you are alluring enough or that you have put on the mystique enough to pull some people to give you all the coins yes in a shampoo um okay so that's i don't know that's as much as i can i feel like that's it's a loose explanation it's hard because there's that debate like people are it's all going i mean i feel like burlesque and strippers are put

down all the time but it's like a different level of put down like yes the whole hierarchy yeah it's The hoe hierarchy. That's what I think of when I think of burlesque and strippers and prostitutes. Listen, the only people who are arguing about like, you're a hoe. No, you're more of a hoe than I am. Are the people who are in the hoe hierarchy. Like the hoe hierarchy. Do you hear me? Do you hear hoe hierarchy? People who aren't doing these jobs, who aren't in the sex worker world or communities. they're just like y'all are all hoes like burlesque dancers you a hoe strippers you a hoe like they're not making these distinctions i walk in i'll be like hey hoes

good morning like there's a top hole there's a below what yeah i mean like just like they are classy strippers and trashy strippers y'all like there's really a difference there is yeah i mean some strip clubs you you don't even be all the way nude right right and then some of them you just bust it wide open yo see the whole labia remember we went to the strip club when we were in miami and we were trying to eat chicken wings and people had like pussies i could see her cervix her cervix was legit in my garlic parmesan no yeah they were like they were wiping their cooch on the pole and we were like we were like can we get some more wipes for these wings yeah these are juicy i was i was wiping down the wings with the damn antiseptic or something i was like

yo these wings got something these wings got chlamydia yeah they were good though um so yeah and then burlesque burlesque how do you like if somebody listening is like i want to be a burlesque dancer how how does one like like get into that i say one just first of all do the research go see some shows do the research about the burlesque legends is that what you did who are some of the burlesque legends that you admire who you're like you gotta see such and such and such and such and such right um well there's name the black people first yeah yeah i'm only naming the black okay so there's miss gina dell so she was actually considered the sepia sally ran so she had the huge feather fans this woman was 4'11 and her fans were like six feet tall

wait what's your name gene adele gene adele okay um there's uh oh gosh there's so many people like that i'm obviously blanking on right now it'll come to you it'll come to me um just shout them out in the middle yeah i mean when they come to you just shout them out we have the living legend right now uh pearl noir she's oh my god she plays the stage all the time we did for black lives matter and she is outstanding i follow her on instagram and she's really all about the art she's like the mother the yeah she's like mother pearl and like if you want to learn burlesque and learn about the history go take her classes because not only is she a phenomenal performer her on stage off stage she's really about letting and reminding people to tap into who they are like

my sexy is not gonna look like you're sexy so don't try to bring my sexy on stage marie let's try it how is her class oh right now she actually has a july or summer special uh-huh so i think is like don't misquote me but go to the black queen she said you gotta go to the website i'm not giving you no prices i'm like you better say something really expensive yeah okay i think it's like 40 or something okay maybe we could try we do a little class for the summer yeah because usually she's like 150 dollars yeah let's get this hour so get that per hour it's 40 an hour for the the entire summer like i don't know more than one for july for sure marie let's take one class and see how this goes okay or we can do you can teach us as well yeah i can teach uh you see how she

stuttered she was like i mean for a fee as well i want to say well cindy has extra ten dollars it can be a private class i'll do a private class i'll do a little private class you should do a unofficial expert meetup and have people people who listen yes wait that would be amazing and then you know they can pay yes yes yes we'll just be there collecting the money free and then uh give you percentage wait so what's the common mistake that people make in burlesque like what's the thing that like people who maybe just start out don't know or something that people go to like they like run it up and trying to like motorboat child like what is happening oh okay so audience members uh here's the thing don't don't come

to a burlesque show if you don't want to see titties like these are the main people who sit in the front row they get the vip tickets and they're with their partners and and they're just really really uncomfortable they're really uncomfortable and they get pretty mean like some women get really what is this what is it i don't get it like and so many of us are queer so it's just you know we try to interact with a woman first which is what most of us do um but sometimes i'm just not feeling it and in the beginning that used to bother me i'm like oh you know i just i wish that these women would understand that like we're just trying to connect yeah and it's a show you're a performer but anything with sexuality

makes people uncomfortable that is just the society we live in listen people are going through their own thing you know they may have probably cheated on them with their sisters so they're going through a lot wait did y'all see the video of the girl at the fashion show or something and she was walking up to some dude oh yeah yes she put her foot on the girl's chest yes she was like nope yes and that woman handled it so beautifully she was just like okay she's very classy about it and she walked away with her bitch i would have took them fashion nova boots and threw them right back at her i would have took that boot off and booted her i'll put the fucking boot back on i'm like let me put on some charlotte ruse boots on my chest how dare you

with these wet seal boots touch my skin from delia yo these gsw sail rack clearance you gotta take these shoe dazzles i can't i cannot so women who have some esteem issues don't like it but they come to burlesque shows that they don't know what they're walking into well here's the thing i think that some people think that they are going to come to see like burlesque the movie like showgirls dancing and nobody stripping and that was burlesque the mute the movie with christina aguilera because we didn't want to see her yeah was she still was she still a little chunky in that movie no no no she was cute i just but they wasn't showing no like they didn't have enough uh budget so you didn't go for that right so they have the

costumes but there wasn't that wasn't that was jazz dance i wasn't burlesque okay okay but y'all have costumes and you i mean i've seen you in some yo you come together you got the corsets do you put the corset on you by yourself i do now okay i couldn't before i could not it was uh it's definitely an art form to put that corset on with all the steel boning oh my gosh that's why you're so snatched i'm trying to get snatched i'm trying i feel like waist trainers are the like new corsets they are they are but they change like your actual body yeah but corsets they actually have like some kind of appearance like people's waist trainers be looking dirty and just raggedy and they look like they go to the gym in them things they sleep in them things

yeah i feel like you can put a rack of lamb in it like it's just like you're supposed to hold wood in these damn it don't look like cute like get your waist trainer game up get your corset boo it looks like a back brace get you a corset that could do both like why why you got the waist trainer looking so dingy yeah but you nothing that you wear looks dingy i feel like so beautiful i met you you had on red lipstick with the sparkles glitter glitter on it and i ran to michael's and got me some red glitter and then i tried to do it and i looked crazy i was like my mouth is too big i have the red glitter here and i've never worn out can you help us yes we should definitely do that yo can we do this one event yo it will be popping yes we need to do this i think it will

be the look yo yeah i feel like i'm into it maybe that's what we should do is you like a different live event with a different expert yes and first of all i mean not only is your body sick but your whole performance like you really give it to the audience like i really feel like i should be paying more i'm like wow i'm just sydney you all about paying more i feel like because you're so good and you only do like you have money we get it lorraine i will sneak into a show and sit in the back and be like yes and i won't have paid and i'm sneaking in a drink you give like a pin-up girl like grace jones like you you have like so many different hairstyles yes yes well i love you know nipple tassels i

like switching it up i'm like i think that's the chameleon aspect you do it right and also when i'm on stage um because when i first started burlesque so many people in the burlesque community were telling me that i wasn't doing burlesque uh because i was bringing something that was sensual wait what yes that doesn't even make okay let's speak on it because there's some people who do these characters in burlesque right and they're like very wacky and it's not sexual at all and then you know the body be a little different but like i i there's everybody is different in burlesque you don't have to all be the same i that's why you when you do a burlesque show you want to see the same thing over and over again but i don't want to see a comedian take their

clothes off to music you know what i mean like if i wanted to do that i would go to a naked comedy show like i don't you know shout out to the creek in the cave uh promoting him naked they did a naked roast a couple weeks ago but your comics out on stage and battled butt-ass naked i was like i would like to see that not only are your jokes bombing but so is your dick wow like probably i don't know we didn't go because we are not i don't want to say i don't want to say that have you seen some of these comedians bodies i will come to shade the burlesque terrible i will not go to a naked roast battle they eat terrible they don't work out and they sleep all day i don't even go to the roast battles when they got all their clothes on so why the fuck would i want to

see them butt ass naked oh my god with the ashy ankles no thank you so i'm not here for all these peen pink penises bombing oh yeah no thank you they got little hats on the damn penis no thank you little turtlenecks i'm trying not to get the hiccups turtleneck podcast get an accent for black isn't it like ninja turtles i don't know they look like ninja turtles the penis yeah city i don't know what last time you saw a dick i have not i've seen one i guess it's been a while for me too because i'm like do they look like uh sweet lorraine get us back on track yes yes i don't even know what we were talking about but um oh well okay we were talking about the different types of burlesque because they

say you weren't doing burlesque right they were saying that i wasn't doing burlesque because it was sensual and it was sexy and i feel like people were uncomfortable with that people who were in the burlesque community weren't comfortable with sexy and that is so weird and they were like well they were saying oh well there wasn't a concept or you didn't put implying that i didn't have a concept or implying that i didn't put as much work into it your concept was that you're sexier than everybody in the room that's what it is um put as much work into it because the this element of sexy that their acts didn't usually have that's right so each his own though i'm glad that you stayed in it and you didn't let that get you down and like you hold your own and

you're definitely you definitely stand out yeah amongst the burlesque community when you perform you put on a show that i feel like people want to see or expect to see when they go to burlesque the dancers the other burlesque performers might not think what you're doing or might not have thought what you were doing was burlesque but that's what people when i go see burlesque i go to see people like you thank you because marie marie not here for anything outside the box no this is the box that i want i mean not the box but you know i mean girl well sweet lorraine speaking of sexy like everybody has to be comfortable in their own skin and i think that's weird that like people would be saying that like the aspect that you're showing

is not burlesque when it takes so much balls just to do what the fuck you're doing and expensive on top of that how much is each gig like what's the rating like what like you don't have to give me exact numbers but i'll give you exact okay because we really make dozens of dollars a day um dozens you know i don't spill the tea girl there is so much tea to be spilled the costumes are expensive the hair the makeup exactly which is why i'm into wig rejuvenation i'll be teaching some classes on that soon um yeah because you just you can put out a ton of money on one costume and that's what we kind of learned um for people who want to get into burlesque get that one costume together make sure it's polished make sure it looks good

and keep doing that number over and over again you know i think in the beginning we think oh i need to keep creating all these pieces no you will go broke you will start how much is one costume it depends on like one of my most expensive costumes i would say is it may be like 300 and i worked on that like you built that yes and i made that i'm like i stitched it with you didn't go buy it in the store go buy it yeah yeah because in the store they'll they'll literally rape you they're like they know that you guys want to look great so the prices will go the rhinestones alone like don't even i don't know i know a few a handful of people who buy swarovski crystals which is what dita von t's wears on her costumes uh when we you know

unless you have another nine to five and you're not and you're you don't care about the money um and you can afford to buy swarovski crystals that's like if i buy like 30 crystals swarovski crystals that's like 30 dollars so how much men can't tell the difference no one can tell of lights hit they like oh she's no one's real shiny look how shiny she look up there she look like a disco ball yeah yeah so you find little tricks and tips and tools along the way to like bring those prices down yeah but what's the rate for a show most of the burlesque shows are paying fifty dollar fifty dollars for one act bitch what i'm sorry excuse me fifty dollars there is um you guys know essence revealed yes revealed she's great she's great in so many ways and she also

is not afraid to negotiate with these uh venue owners um and she was able to negotiate a hundred dollars for one act ah beautiful uh plus tips plus tips and the tips like you could leave there with 150 for one act wow which is what we should be doing now when we do private gigs that's completely different like i'm you clean up private gigs they have the budget for it but i'm saying for your daily base like you go to these shows on a weekly thing where you like pay your rent they're they're 50 that's great to see a titty right that's how comedy is yeah oh we get nothing so you can probably give us maybe 20 bucks sometimes with the tips you can leave out of there with maybe the high end of 75 80 for one act but you know if people producers mainly if

they don't promote their shows nobody will be there you don't get those extra tips so there's so many we're not that different you and i yeah i mean yeah i mean it cost me a lot of money to you know get my act together right here you know you know i got costumes and whatnot have you i mean you talked a lot about um sexiness your sensuality getting you into trouble has your sexiness ever helped you like have you ever like gotten out of a ticket or like you skipped the line at the dmv has anybody ever paid your fucking rent for a month yes talk to us about that get into it seen it's ever been super positive um hasn't been positive you know what i think listen i'm sure i've gotten a free drink or two no no no no no sis that don't count because we

get free drinks all the time and i ain't got no dungarees i got dungarees on and i'll be getting a free drink so i need you in a forever 21 legging people in a pj somebody's giving me i need to know but i do get a lot of free desserts brought over at restaurants people be sending you stuff to the table what else gifts gifts tell us give us the real yeah you are holding back right you really are i feel like you am i yeah i feel like you are boo listen whatever you got going on i you know what let me you know what i really i'm trying hard to think about let's spit some things out and if you want something just go ahead and say here i just say present uh okay plane ticket to somewhere trips travel oh yeah oh okay that's what we're

talking about sis yeah yeah yeah so uh but here's the thing i get really freaked out by that so you need friends to come with you exactly we got you snm you're like oh if you want snm you got to get the snm you gotta get the unofficial experts of cock yes oh we're here to help block that coxist oh i'm a okay okay yeah i've definitely had offers to be flown places but you don't go i don't go because i'm like are you gonna chop me up into a little that's why you gotta bring a friend all my friends have brought me with them because they're like she's got personality right this is when i didn't even have titties so they're like she's gonna talk a lot and she's gonna do a lot of interference and she's gonna drink and get turnt up do all the drugs and it's gonna be like nope

this you're gonna get sick and then the night's gonna be over so exactly see you need that in your life yeah so i guess i've had those um experiences where have people offered to fly you out to um anguilla jacksonville no okay this uh this actually happened in college um he was like i have what first of all what type of car would you like me to drive you around in and he was like there's i can get a ferrari for us right now or i could get this that and the other and i was like i don't care about cars i don't i was just not in that headspace before instagram because you would have cared i would cared then now this damn age i'm like i don't care about any car just put whatever you want

in my account yeah that's yeah i just want the money so he just offered to pick you up and drive you around yeah he was visiting one of my friends who's uh who was very well off her father was in oil did you hear that well off i'm gonna start using that i'm gonna stop saying rich and i'm just gonna say well off yeah but you say rich because you don't know nobody who's well off i do know well off people rich people i know well yeah so um so yeah so her father was in oil and i'm sure his father was also in oil and then his father was in slaves def had a plantation so oh my gosh i was like um no you're trying a little too hard you have too much money he could like kill me and cover it up he was trying to definitely make you a maid so

i'm glad you didn't do that dude you could have got a meal out of that but like what about people do you have like oh do you have like stalkers creepy people at your shows yeah we saw the players club anybody who follows you home and says i was just trying to make sure remember i've had a few people i've had a few people that i've just had to block officially like this one guy would just come to well first of all i didn't even think that i was on his radar because he has an asian woman fetish and anybody who knows burlesque and well your eyes are slanted yes they are you look like cat eyes you look a little blaze and if you smoke some weed little dark skin geisha i see it is your hair asian what kind of hair is that

malaysian yes malaysian version chinese hair so he would show up to all my shows for about two weeks straight every single show no uh he knew your whole schedule like he just knew my schedule and then he would show up with like a giant bouquet he was like what type of flowers do you like and i was just like you know just trying to talk and be yeah you want to be polite like cordial you don't want to be mean he would make a pit stop to the cemetery pick up some of them flowers and then come to your show and he brought me these huge bouquets of like roses and sunflowers which i love oh sunflowers he gonna chop you up so i just need one sunflower don't buy me a bouquet it was huge and i was just like why is this guy still here um and then he wanted to like walk me

to the train station oh yeah and i was just like no no no you're getting me a huge bouquet you need to get me an uber home and you need to take the train by yourself yeah it's true yeah so um so he did that nothing well i just i had to tell him to just back off officially because he waited around because we were waiting for him to leave like the restaurant was about to shut down everything and he's just sitting there in the corner sweating with another bouquet oh brother and it's like 2 30 in the morning i'm chilling with my friends who are still hanging out and we're in the show and he's there and he's there and i was like you know what no i don't owe you anything i don't owe you any of my time any of that please stop yeah do you have security

guards next to you like uh holding you down i don't do you have a boo you have a boo i do have a boo and your boo like is like runs interference well she knows i like if i get she's so sweet i really love siobhan she's she's not like overbearing she lets you do you she sits there so like when i first met you i didn't even know that was your boo because she wasn't like in the front acting crazy right and like drooling and like blocking you from your shine shy so she kind of likes to be she's shy every time i see her she got something to say to me she likes to be the back i have to like chorus her to go to the shows is it hard to have to be in a relationship and do what you do no absolutely not she seems so understanding well yeah and also

like who doesn't love a stripper who doesn't want to see like booty meat and thongs i don't wear clothes when i'm at the house like and my new wig flowing like who doesn't want to see wait but do you do that in the house do you do that all the time with like on a regular basis or what i feel like you just be pretty much yeah yeah i'm literally and i get she tells me i get dressed the wrong way because i am in heels first and nothing else she's just like she's like uh where the rest of you well there you have it folks thank you so much because i got i got like a visual now i'm like damn but she likes me when i'm not like she enjoys all of me oh that's what you want you want to

be with somebody who enjoys all of you but you see i feel like i'm a little bit different i don't want anybody who enjoys all of me too much because i'd be like this nigga crazy like i feel like if a dude is too into me which i feel like is what keeps happening to me like people like me more than i like them is i don't like that no this is this is balanced it's very balanced we've been together for years so long like nine years nine years yeah and i met her when i was engaged to a man and had a girlfriend you were engaged to a man and you had a girlfriend and then you met her yes yo sweet luane you are in these streets you are hurting hearts and taking it you in these sheets too boo wow i was polyamorous how did you have all that time like you had to work

too how'd you have all these people okay um i don't know i just felt like i was i was in the moment i was like i am ready to explore my sexuality i feel like i am i have the ability to love more than one spread the booty meat girl wait how do you can we can you said polyamorous how does that work you've been with this you've been with your chick for nine years and you're still polyamorous and i'm still polyamorous right now how many girlfriends you got i don't have siobhan is my is number one she's number one she is but how many other numbers are there two three four five six no um because i don't really actually like to date if i feel somebody if i meet somebody so you so you can go out have

a show you might meet somebody right that looks like sydney washington and then just slide off for her no no no no no they're they're definite rules oh what the fuck is the regulations for me well the rules are like for me um well the rules for me adrian ain't coming down with that shit but what's your rules girls my rules are like when you when you feel like you have a crush let me know i don't want to know when you are in love and y'all are going on dates and you want to take trips then i feel like the jealousy will come in but if you're like oh i like find this person attractive like marie foster i would like to go on a date with her or him or whatever uh i'm like oh let me know that sounds cute like when you're all going out oh so she's also polyamorous

she she's also polyamorous so she comes with you or like well how does that work because y'all a bunch of sexy ass hoes okay and when y'all go out in this polyamorous date who the fuck paying are y'all splitting checks and splitting legs what's up the dude with the big bouquet he is not there you should be you think he's not there you should let him be in the corner and drop that card for all of y'all for the whole crew running the coup you're loving the coup this has been amazing we're really gonna do this event yes i think that that's what we should do we should do matter of fact leave us a comment uh tweet us um and um i'm miss reese on twitter m s r e e e z y tweet us and let us know how many people would be interested in doing something like

this because i feel like it'd be an actual like an actual really great yes and i'm just said j u s t s y d n y c on twitter tweet us please so we can get this together and you know we'll we'll do a slide and scale for the people for the people who can afford more and for the people who can do you a little discount you're not going you're going to be in the back though you're not going to get all the ass you're going to be in the back with my broke ass sitting in her extra i'll be in the front sweet lorraine my sweet sweet friend uh if there's anything that you could leave people with about burlesque or polyamorous love or whatever what would you want them to take away from this podcast what would that be um i would just say do you don't try to emulate anyone else in terms of

another burlesque performer like we all have something special and magical about us to share i know it sounds corny but like when i finally said yes i'm tapping into my sexy and i'm going to be uninhibited and like just unapologetically sexy on stage i feel like that's when i started to feel the most comfortable the most accepting of myself so do that and um and i felt like that applied it just permeated through the rest of my life permeated you heard that city permeated find your true self and let that permeate boo uh where can people catch you who are listening to yes please all your information instagram twitter what's coming up what gotcha um so shades of burlesque you can find me at um at shades of burlesque on instagram uh shades of

burlesque on twitter uh at sweet lorraine ny on twitter and instagram and uh my shows like we said before shades of burlesque is the only all-black uh burlesque show in new york city safe word nyc is a kinky bdsm burlesque spectacle so all this stuff happens it was there was clamps on the nipples i was like wow we just had king noir and jet setting jasmine those delicious porn stars that showed up and showed all the way out um and that's also all those shows are i come on everybody and then i have a show for the novice burlesque performer called sweet fantasy burlesque which is every other month. And all those shows

will be coming back in September because I gots to take a break and enjoy myself. So, uh... Ooh, that voice is sexy. Follow me. I'm going to go put on

some assless chaps. Yeah. Thank you so much I'm going to go change my clothes right now. Cindy needs to put a panty liner in. Yeah, I do.

Moist. And I'm going to go put on some panties. Yeah. Thank you guys so much. This has been so fun. rate subscribe comment bye