MESS with Sydnee Washington & Marie Faustin - "The Unofficial Expert Expert" with Larry Owens

Episode Date: March 12, 2021

We're making history on this week's episode, Larry Owens joins us for the third time as our The Unofficial Expert Expert! Larry talks about his favorite episodes, guests, and on-air fights we've listened to in the past four years. Plus, Larry goes in on his current feud with Sydnee while staying at her house.----Listen to The Unofficial Expert Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus:https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus----BUY UNOFFICIAL EXPERT MERCH:https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-unofficial-expert-podcast----FOLLOW THE UNOFFICIAL EXPERT:https://www.instagram.com/UnofficialExpertFOLLOW SYDNEE:https://www.instagram.com/JustSYDbwhttps://twitter.com/justsydnycFOLLOW MARIE:https://www.instagram.com/Reeezyhttps://twitter.com/MsReeezyFOLLOW ANDREW:https://www.instagram.com/mcgui_guySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

forever dog hi hello hi sydney hi marie how's everything you know um they're good i got my nails done today they look great you see them they're so beautiful white no it's one hand is white with a black dot and one is black with white dots too cool the coolest it does feel very cool yeah and then i got yellow toes oh you're so fun yeah you know it's uh almost spring it's supposed to be in the 60s this week in new york i don't know if you know that no i didn't know and you know unfortunately the way my attitude is set up it's not dependent on the weather so what does that mean well like people tell me about the weather like that's gonna change how I feel but when it is nice and it's sunny and you like step outside you're there's always

that moment of oh it's nice out and then you kind of like stand in the sun for a little bit yeah I guess you're right I'm just saying like I I get no I actually don't get but you do you be in the house with your lights and your sunlight and your sunset light and your noon light and your dusk lamp and the like when they subscribe vitamin d to people that's one of the vitamins that affect how happy or sad we are and you get that from the sun so literally standing in the sun like your cats be doing will actually change your mood but you don't want to you don't want to do that that's not true i do that when's the last time you did that i was outside today but it was cold yeah so okay i guess you're right maybe um fun fact

you know my mood is a little i i hadn't took i hadn't taken my meds for five days because i had a fiasco with the pharmacy and fedex um but took it yesterday took it today we're gonna get back on track but there's a lot of uh withdrawal symptoms that happen from it and one of them is irritability oh okay oh okay oh that's great i was like oh she mad at me today for something no it's just you just irritable because you you going through withdrawal oh well i'm glad you're back on schedule friend do you want to tell the people why what the fiasco was the fiasco just was like they said that they sent it it said it was delivered um someone someone stole my package of of drugs and so and then um carolina's husband was supposed to pick

them up he couldn't get there in time uh then i was supposed to pick them up was an hour late for a gig could not pick them up oh yeah then they said they they sent it it never showed up then amina got them so shout out to amina for being a really good friend shout out to women on women's history month yeah women's history month thank you so much we're also really like really shout out to amina amina amani for the win truly um marie you have some new developments and i would love to hear them on the patreon which we will be doing soon so what's the new developments you know the new developments friend you talking about my new wig no oh oh you know yeah yeah i think i know what you're talking about but i'm not really sure um yes for the patreon whatever you need

the patreon is like truth or dare this this this podcast is like dare and the patreon is truth that's what we tell our the truth yes there it is we're we're still recovering from the langston kerman episode but we're getting through it and i love no we're not we're not recovering i ordered a salmon teriyaki bento box last week because of you i was like oh that's what i owe the salmon teriyaki should be nice yeah and then i was on the phone with my mom and she was she was like ew you're eating sushi the fish isn't even cooked and i was like i gotta go yeah i'm gonna talk to you later um do you think it was good was it worth it it was yummy the sushi place i have like two places that i could juice from because i'm very very privileged um but the plate the the

place that i went was really good um yeah look at that an influencer proud sydney you have new developments you were in w magazine that's true oh yeah with jam i was jam is more booked than most of us yeah yeah jam jam is over me he's gonna eat my face in my sleep he's like i don't want to take any pictures anymore no he likes it he looks real cuddly he looked like he was in get out you know and the guy with the hat lakeith's uh character he looked like that in the photo speaking of lakeith i watched judah and the black messiah last night and now i don't like lakeith so right ruined him for me he's he's right up there with blair underwood and terrence howard and all those other people that i don't like the villain the villain yeah he played he played the

hell out of it though i was so mad i was like um yeah anyway that's i was i was thinking about that this morning and behind her eyes i watched that what's that about it's a show that's on netflix i didn't mean to tongue pop right on the microphone like that i sorry um i uh it's a show on netflix that i started watching because our friend christy cello said that the main character reminded her of me and i was like let me watch this show to see and then i was like that's not what i look like um but it's a six episode thing it's it's good but it also it pissed me off at the end so damn you know hollywood babe netflix darling yeah oh she's drinking a martini no this is water with grapes in it

obsessed but the glass is giving you martini vibes it's a coop yeah cool okay a coop um a coop of water um sydney do you want to start this episode do you uh did you have something that you wanted to something else you wanted to say oh no no no i i was just want to say that i was an expert in you know being the best even when i was at my worst so do you think that you were really at your worst in these last five days yes my emotions were just either they were oh i'll be fine and then it was like panic mode so were you panicking because you felt like oh my god i i've missed too many days or were you panicking because it because the the medication keeps you from panicking right like when i was late an hour

late for the gig that was the first time i felt complete anxiety like my body was shaking like i i could not control it i was overwhelmed but um i'm back baby i'm back let's go wow i'm so i'm so excited for our guest today yeah it says three is a charm yes three is a charm oh is this a three peat yes three peat this would be our his third time on this motherfucking podcast i mean he's uh he's a legend he's a legend and he is my husband and your friend very talented uh accomplished award-winning award-winning award-winning oh since the last time he's been on the uh podcast Pulitzer Prize winner right Pulitzer Prize is it is that what Pulitzer Award I think Pulitzers are for books yes yeah for writing yes that's what it is I saw

the thumbs up yeah okay I think the next time for the fourth time this person does the pod he's going to be fresh off a TED Talk. I think so too. Or a crazy big film. Give it up for Larry Owens, who is the expert of the unofficial expert.

Mic check, one, two. One, two. Mic check. Can you hear me out there across America? Can you hear me? No, like literally, can you hear me? Like, confirm or deny. Can you hear me? We hear you, babe.

Okay, you can hear me. Happy Women's History Month. Happy Women's Day. Oh, my God. Happy Women's Day. Yeah, it was Black Day six days ago, and now we're just doing women's. Yeah, y'all get to keep celebrating. Black women's.

Yeah, I feel great. Black women's. I will not. I will love a women's. Women, women, women, women. Do you remember that viral video? No. Oh, my gosh.

it's the guy in the church and he's like I am not gay I am not gay I will love a woman and then they lay hands on a big E and he start doing the tongues

but it's not even real tongue God he just be he go and they lay him out so you know that's when I think of women I immediately think of that I immediately think of that

story I will love a women's I will not love a man I will not wear hot heels is that the delivered guy delivered yes I am delivered Andrew Caldwell yes okay it came right came right to

that brain the full government yeah so delivered is the only part that I know but I didn't know the yeah there's gems the uncut version there's gems all around that delivered delivered is the t-shirt but you know the whole monologue

just it just the whole thing I will not wear a dress I will not wear high heels I instead I will love a women's and then of course we tripled down on it women women women women I will not wear a dress

I will not wear a wig it's good it's an oldie but a goodie meanwhile fun fact the delivered guy is on this season of UK's Drag Race are you serious? are you serious Mary? UK hon

UK hon Okay, he's on Drag Race Han. That's where Han comes from, Sydney. Sydney hates when I say Han. I've only started saying Han since UK Drag Race. They did UK Han. And so now I'll put a real hard, crusty British Han at the end of a sentence.

And Sydney's like, shut it all the way down. Are you saying Han? Yeah, Han. Han, yeah. Han, with an O. He's been doing it all week, but he's doing it at the moment where it's like, oh you're being so shady it's not thing is that Han brings the shade where there was none like

I'm just like he passed me that raspberry uh LaCroix Han and you're like okay Han it sounds like you're saying horn you're hearing Han as as full bitch you're hearing Han as the b word when it's not it's like it's like baby it's like it's something a little softer but it's just British and as we know Britain actually is trending as we speak I don't know when it's gonna drop but right now britain is the monarchy is on fire we love it we love that the monarchy is on fire megan markel took her uh her her pink butt you said her pink butt yeah she's pink to me i was like i was like what color are y'all calling her because to me they're like what color is the baby gonna be like a pinkish pinkish gray probably i don't know if i think megan is pink

but she's definitely lighter, I think, than Rashida Jones. Exactly. Yes, our good Italian sister. Good Italian, yes. Yes, Rashida Jones has been playing good Italian, and I love you, girl, if you listen to this, but yeah, you've been playing Italian since I've been in high school. She's been playing Italian longer than Jennifer Lopez.

I was just about to say that. I was like, J-Lo is famously Italian. That's the only role she can get. I love her. The last time she was Spanish, it was actually Selena. So I love how if it's in New York, was she not Spanish when she was made in Manhattan? They made a white lady. Oh, yes.

Oh, yes. They made. She would have to be like white Yugoslavian, Eastern European. Then then that's, you know, that's how they do white maids. But yeah, that's not going to be the Italian side. No, she was Puerto Rican and made in Manhattan. But the thing is, in New York, it's the same accent. And so that's why she's like she can get away with it because we like don't really it's

not really clear in the movie sometimes. but you know they just do like a general new york new york east yeah i heard from i actually don't remember who so probably a reputable source that um on set and in like real life jlo is very bronx okay so i said well then does maybe she's a better actress than we thought because i don't see that at all i don't i don't believe it i don't believe that she's very bronx because everybody who's actually work with her they said that she is not nice and that's the bronx babe bronx babe was like that sounds bronx boogie down bronx hon hon that's not true that's not true the bronx go up to the bronx they like welcome here's a fruit basket hey mamacita black black girl

is that what they do up there no but in dykeman well you can pardon my language that was not lgbtq that's literally what it's called that was very aggressive no that was that's no lgbtq like literally just the trade stop no it's called dykeman yes because sydney sydney's quick to be like i'm lgbtq she don't like she don't like him none of that stuff rightfully so everybody everybody on the zoom is gay as hell marie marie you eating girl booty i'm not eating girl booty um i'm barely eating man booty i was like so i was like lgbtq for women's history month i love that well you know i could be the cute you know let me take this wig off i'm the cute with these cornrows

okay so larry you're here because you're the expert of us so yeah absolutely yes since since 2016 before i even knew you you know this podcast has been affecting my life dating back to the very first episode you know the hood expert with pd dabro it's a classic okay yes yeah new listeners are gonna want to go back to the beginning and really you get to hear sort of like how unhinged it was before it comes over to the um forever dog auspices you get to hear the very much we are in the living room dining room like pre-covid so now of course we're back in the living room dining room circle of life um we're back in the living room dining room but yeah my first episode was in the living room dining room and um yeah all the way up to langston kerman just

last week and of course salman teriyaki um i said salman with the l come on black no no no come on dc education oh my god i'm from baltimore come on the wire i said i was like not marie from all the way from haiti come on now let's go like we cannot say the i don't say the l we actually in clear it's so more so you i know truly though yeah because y'all got the french down y'all know when to cancel out the um the consonants y'all know when to cancel the consonants and when to say the consonants okay so you were there for the salmon teriyaki yeah yeah the salmon teriyaki it was really the straw that broke the camel's back for both of you okay do you have any thoughts on that episode

i mean just just tracking this relationship and it's all you know it's very tyra banks who's on top like you know at one moment someone has something to uh weaponize over the other and like you know it's gonna be brought out I also love like information in real life that like gets coaxed out on the podcast slowly but yeah Sam and Teriyaki was just a peek behind the curtain because

you really get to see the feelings and the vulnerabilities of the host as well and that interaction that interplay and I will say it's just always it's always shocking to see what

sets it off you know and it's because it's never something you can think about it's never like because the thing is if you if someone if someone were to call the other person like yeah you bitch like that's funny but like if you order food in the podcast that's an affront that's an attack so it's the unpredictability

and and it is sort of like the sightiness of it that is really really fun to watch as an observer being a third being a third eye on it it's So you've been listening from the beginning to the most recent. No, no.

I just chose this, and I did some light research before I got on. Oh, I was going to say, do you remember any other arguments or fights that we've had on this podcast? Oh, wait. Do you? Yes. The only time we've ever really had a fight was when it was with Carolina about the food. And it's always food. It's always food related.

and that's why it's food that's trying to break our sisterhood up for new listeners go into the food the Carolina one a little bit if people just joined with Langston last week what happened because you know I listened and I remember but well I would actually

like Andrew to explain it because he's in the middle okay this is giving a hot potato we're all going to pass the buck there won't be any emotion tied to Andrew saying it so from my recollection of the situation Sydney was living

she was new to Carolina's building and Carolina provided Sydney with a nice dinner I believe allegedly went for a bowl of cereal but there was no cereal to be had and so then

Sydney made a snide comment about like there not being any cereal and so Carolina then promptly lost it and then uh it had nothing to do with sydney for an allocated amount of time and then sydney brought it to the podcast and then it talked about it in a conversation that was released to thousands of people yeah that's what i remember no sydney got mad at carolina

after that and she stopped talking to carolina okay thank you marie period that's the only thing that was the only. That was the only detail that was. Well, no, no, no. The reason why I was mad at Carolina is because she went to Marie about it, which is which is fine. We're we're all friends because you would totally tell Marie.

Yeah, I thought that y'all was yet tight, tight sisters, besties. I mean, if Monday night was any, you know, Sunday night, anything to show for. Yeah. Y'all, y'all, y'all tight. Y'all girlfriends. Yeah. Put a pin in it. Yeah, yeah. I put a pin in that. But for the record, they

sisters okay they close they close it's girls trip i can't be it's girls trip i can't believe you bringing outside things we didn't have to coax that out of you no no no i'm coming no i know i have an hour i know i got i'm just pacing it we did some history we're doing history right now so in your mind in your mind carolina did what carolina told marie and then when we got when we got on the podcast marie was going off on me about it she's like you know carolina gives her food, her space to you. It's real rude. She's like, I see how you go to people's homes. You just be opening

up their refrigerator. You don't even go to the grocery store. So Marie was going off on me. Oh, she said Gibbs. But I felt like Marie was going off on me on behalf of Carolina because Carolina was acting like a victim in front of Marie. And Marie was like, I'm going to be a big sister.

Oh, my God. First of all. Hi, I'm doing the podcast. Sorry. Is that Carolina? It's JoJo. oh yeah it's like oh my god the timing because i would say come in girl get on my mic yes for the listeners at home i am quarantining at sydney's for the week yes i guess yes private island negative tests like vaccine first round moderna pfizer we don't have but we're looking for them i am obese and eligible but um obese and eligible i mean oh you want that pilot today

yeah that's that's a forever memoirs for memoirs my obese and eligible oh my gosh beautiful title well that's for our next solo episode thank you actually obese and eligible is the new medea oh lord tyler perry markel said megan markel yeah yes megan got to read the manuscript when she was at tyler's compound with the security and harry had to watch uh reunion here they made harry watch the stage plays now the movies are one thing but they they made harry prince harry watch the stage plays of medea goes to j medea's class reunion medea's funeral medea's gender reveal party okay bring oh my god that was the uh the cereal fiasco of 2019 um and um cereal salmon teriyaki it really is the feud food is the feud food is the feud i know we're doing bars tonight a beast ineligible

food is the feud but you know i still don't have a good christian gay t-shirt but no i'll go buy one though no no larry don't do that we are gonna get you a t-shirt because are you on the second or third printing of the t-shirts because i mean i'm like am i gonna get a t-shirt this is the place to do it i'm the unofficial expert expert yeah it's the t-shirt with the slogan on it and I'm in the house, but I can't get no shirts. But I'll pay. I'll pay. Hold on.

Hold on. Wait, Larry. Hold on. Larry, tell her. Okay, let's take the pin out, and let's talk to Marie about. Take the pin out? The t-shirt? No, I'm doing t-shirt right now.

What's your answer for the shirt? Put a pin in the t-shirt, and let's go about. Let's talk about this. Oh, y'all don't got 3Xs? Oh, you're sizist. Okay, I love that. Okay, you don't got 3Xs. It's T-Republic, babe.

I don't know what to talk to them. Oh, you don't take into consideration your plus size members? Heard. if you want to wear it as a crop we might could be able to do it i will wear it as a crop i'll wear as a crop and as a layer i mean larry stay arts and crafting his shirts together so it's fine he'll cut the sleeves off he'll do a little cut out too he do yeah so it's fine but larry get talk to marie about what you were how you felt no and actually no because the thing is like i wasn't even going to bring it because i found out no no because marie wasn't culpable

So originally, like how I heard it all shake out, I was like, oh, really, Marigos? I was like, let me set the scene. First of all, Marigos, thank you for the throwback. But we were all meeting me, Sydney, Amina, Carolina. We're having we decided we were going to go get some ramen yesterday. Larry is staying with Sydney. I'm quarantined for the week. Yes.

I mentioned that. Sure, sure, sure. Yes. And Sydney said Larry wanted to come. but like it was a girl's thing like we love you larry we heart you down uh-huh uh-huh yeah no but see it wasn't even put to me as a girl's thing it was more like do you want to come i was like yeah i'll go and then and then i was then i was disinvited and and the reason let me finish my part i'm the guest see can i be the guest once can i be the guest once no lying larry i can't

be the guest with a lie you you so i invited i i said oh let me go yes you did i said i'm going i'm going to dinner you were like okay we'll see oh so you never invited me even worse you were just gonna leave you're just gonna leave out the house what yeah what's the truth here babe you're just gonna leave out the house well however it shook out i was told that that you guys needed to see each other because y'all don't get to see each other now mind you i've seen sydney four days four days in the calendar pandemic year but uh i don't know you're lying i said you said we don't get to see each other huh i said they just wanted to be the girls that's what i told you there was see yeah but there was also there was also a line there was also a line about we don't

get to see each other and i was like well i don't get to see you which is why i'm here but you're for seven days babe so everything she do you gonna do for the next seven days yeah it's not enough i love her i'm like more oh i'm obsessed female yeah maybe right maybe right now but maybe right now but my call log is different when i'm not here so like i'm trying to soak it up in person but i was told to stay at home but um with people that i know people that i know you're saying And Sidney invited you and then asked us. Well, if she didn't even invite me to me, that's worse. No, I don't think that's worse.

Yeah, I know. We're disagreeing. Larry was like, he's like, I don't know anybody who goes out when they got a house guest. I was like, you're not a house guest. You're my friend. But then this morning on the phone call, she's like, I have a house guest. She was like, well, she don't want to do something. I'm a house guest.

Let me think. Let me check in with my house guest. but then that I was a close friend at that moment I was being very particular about the semantics so that I can know so that I can have my expectations in the right place if she's going out don't expect to go honey because you're a close friend but then I'm hearing through through the wall let me check with Larry because I have a house guest okay because she didn't want to go and so for me for me I'm just looking for the line I'm finding out where it is and yeah I can I don't have to be happy at everything it wasn't my happiest moment I was

like disappointed but i was i heard that i heard that you weren't really spearheading the no but now you actually seem team no marie so now i'm glad i'm glad it's brought up because i wasn't gonna come here with that first of all larry this is why you agreed to do the podcast you said oh yeah i'm a it's gonna be some mess between me and sydney that i can spew for the thousands of listeners worldwide but also i i i wasn't the person who set up the dinner yesterday the person who set up the dinner set it up with a specific purpose and that's the person who hit who hit sydney with the preferably yeah no and that's and that's okay because i didn't i didn't realize it was such a precious event because to me um as far as i know y'all y'all be in each

other's face um so i i that was really i think my gross miscalculation that i didn't know that it was like a girls girls are sacred it was women's history mom so i i'm understanding that now actually well we me and marie be in each other's face right but not carolina of course lives upstairs but yeah keep going amina lives in harlem which is another borough and she has a whole son and she's the traveling pants oh and she and she takes all of those duties really seriously and she's she's she's planted she's historically and famously planted at home um home homeschooling every day uh afraid to leave the borough actually there's one person who sat down and never have left their borough it's my good sis so it's all scanning carolina you don't see she's upstairs

marie you don't see we're on the call right now and amina of course does not travel yeah no it's it's for me for me every single thing is lining up it's making sense it makes perfect sense um mary yeah this is what i'm gonna say uh-huh mediator mediator uh marie just listening because you know that's that's what i do uh you're staying at sydney's house as her friend slash house guest it's a hybrid hybrid straight you're both of those things because you are her friend but you staying at her house as a guest so you're all of those things yes but you said something like we kind of laughed about it but it's like so every time she leaves her house while you're there you gotta be with her no no no you know i don't like to walk to the store you

I'm not going to the market. Yeah, Larry is not trying to go nowhere. No, and I wasn't even barely trying to go to get ramen. I just got offended because I'm bored, honey. I took it. I said, okay, you know what? Ain't nothing going on this week. I'm going to take this one.

I was like, it's not water for ducks back tonight because I'm bored, okay? I didn't want to go out to ramen. I would have been very insecure and anxious, actually, because I don't dine out. He doesn't want to go anywhere. I asked him, hey, can you come to the grocery store? And he's like, oh, no, girl. You know I can't. I can't do that.

Not this impression. but okay I got you I'm going to hit you back later with one alright I got you very very petulant naggy whiny nasal gay nice

yeah yeah yeah with the girl on it I mean Larry you are a little nasally don't do that oh absolutely for the placement yeah singer vocalist

you said no girl I'm in the bed I'm in the bed right now I can't I was in the bed if I'm in the bed I get what is it called

peapod what is it called fresh directs did you say fresh directs Yeah, like, when I'm in New York, I get fresh directs. Yeah. It's fresh directs. So, yeah, yeah.

Larry, do you have any iconic episodes that you've listened to and you were like, okay, so now I know the girls? Iconic episodes. Iconic episodes. I mean, like, my mind, because you can't go really far because of the edibles, but, like. Real. Real. Come on, Marie. but the the lacy lacy scam expert really good one paris sj she's she's always good on the podcast

the chemistry is really really great um uh and i mean we like the i feel like the best episodes are when it's just you two like not the best episodes like the content is always good but there is like a snap and crackle when you guys are just uh just talking i'm trying to think if there's like any bits that stand out and well it's three of us now because i read um a review and the person said oh let me bring this review up actually for for everybody to read it was it was a nice it was a nice review i also was like well you could have slid in his dms and said this but um it was a nice uh itunes you know i was gonna you know i read this and i was like i am gonna say this on the unofficial expert okay here comes the review uh the most the most professional

host ever okay so it said uh this is for andrew five stars alden alden in iconic legendary amazing talented innovative exciting exceptional brilliant artistic handsome sydney and marie are great but i low-key listen to the podcast to see what andrew has to say i enjoy his point of view and he is a They're going to hate this episode so far. And he is a good third voice to the podcast. I love to hear him a bit more open and talk about himself more. Keep being awesome, Andrew. Oh, and Andrew got a little tea there.

Andrew said, well, they're going to hate this episode. So you don't feel like you're in that much? I haven't said much yet. All I did was provide a little context of the Carolina fight. Okay. I don't like to talk a lot during the guest episodes because this is your place. Oh, okay. No, but Andrew, we know each other.

We've worked together on my Forever Dog podcast, What Makes You Sing with Larry Owens. Okay, let's go. Plug, plug, plug. You better plug, bitch. Well, if there are Andrew heads out there, Andrew chimes in on the mic. We never sang together, though.

Never. We never sang. Oh, my God. Honestly, it didn't last that long. Corona stopped us in our first year. What would you have sang? Should you guys sing now? No.

Oh, my God. What would you have sang on the show? Okay, so, okay. let me take the mic right now so on my podcast what makes you sing I would ask the guests Sydney and Marie both have individual episodes no drama there whatsoever but

the weave well okay do you remember when we Sydney had left the I was going to do a duo taping with you two because I like really I was like I need this energy like what we're doing right now with song would have been so hilarious and Sydney waited like we ate lunch before shooting

my podcast we taped your podcast everyone insisted we take a break we took a break and then Sydney left to get her weave and I was like but so you got yours and then we didn't have to eat honey we could have gone right into it we went to Shake Shack yeah we did a whole 45 minute turnabout

and then the time crunched and Sydney slunk right off in a black car I have to go she slunk right off in a black car from my scheduled podcast taping and we didn't bring that up but no so as on my podcast what makes you sing with Larry Owens on Forever Dog I ask every guest

Andrew McGuire Andrew, HPA Forever Dog lore HPA what is the music that made you oh my gosh I was anticipating this question

for now years you were when is Larry actually going to ask me it never came the show was also discontinued unfortunately Hi, Alden. Do you like this?

Go ahead. This is for Alden. Yeah. But I mean, like, growing up, it was a lot of, like, it was a lot of, like, Aretha Franklin, Gladys Knight, Chicago. Okay. Let's go, Aretha. Okay, let's go.

What song was that? It was I Say a Little Prayer. We would like to hear it. Yeah. No, we're not actually doing this. Alden. Andrew, get in there. The moment I wake up, get the lead.

They're hitting the backups. They're hitting the dreamers in the back. Come on. Alden, no. I'm so sorry. Come on, Andrew. The moment I wake up before I put on my makeup. Hey!

You got to find the beat. Put some vibrato on it. You're gay. Put some vibrato on it. Aretha is rolling in her grave right now. I know. Everyone is like Alden is removing his review He hates this

Alden loves this This is endearing you to Alden The vulnerability, the fun, the commitment Alden is changing that to his ringtone It's giving ringtone energy I agree Aretha You said Aretha, what else in Chicago?

Both Reach for the Gun But what was the second artist you named? Aretha uh a gladys night it was like it was constantly midnight train to georgia going why constantly in your home yeah talk to us about this motown connection well quiet as it's kept white people love jim crow music they're obsessed okay if you go to a white wedding i will tell you i was a wedding singer for one summer i was so bad at it because i could not remember any of the lyrics because they weren't from musicals like if it doesn't have a character attached to it a feeling

I was just like I know you wanna leave me I would just start I would literally start doing vowel sounds and they were so white and racist and drunk

they didn't know cause I was singing I put the tone on it though but I did not sing I knew no lyrics but the white people they loved Jim Crow is that why you loved it

growing up Andrew? yeah because I'm white no no no but you lived in Long Island and historically from New Jersey you do this constantly

Sydney you don't know where I'm from you think that I'm I don't not to blissfully shrug it off I don't know where you're from and I don't give a fuck imbecile it was very that

Sydney's getting very Wendy Williams interview energy right now I know first of all I know that Andrew has psychotic followers and I say things but it's a joke it's a joke because I don't need them scamming fucking a whole

island looking for him because they know him they hear his voice they hear his voice it's to throw people off the trail Sydney fact this is Sydney fact 102 so you're just looking out for my best friend I am Andrew

Andrew is from New England that would be closer because there's a new in it Andrew is from New Mexico he's from the midwest he's from the continental to southeast sydney's your bodyguard she's your kevin costner friend um she cares about you um okay alden that's it alden that was your moment with andrew that was actually a nice message but why didn't he send that in a dm andrew if you get a dick pic or a message from alden please

bring it to me i mean like it's i mean yeah it's it's it's it's a nice comment about me but it's also benefiting both of you at the same time because he's giving a five-star review so don't do that no oh don't do that what do you mean he could have just said love the pod even andrew goodbye you said even andrew then that's even a completely different message love the pod oh my god i'm kidding okay yeah so larry larry where are you where are you doing this zoom from andrew sorry to cut you off sydney where am i zooming from right now what is this location i've never seen this before i'm in my apartment in chelsea really yeah is that not what i've never seen this i've never seen this like horse head or this like larry is describing andrew's screen

and you know that documentary sydney what happened to the cats or whatever the hell the thing is that you watched somebody listening alden is gonna listen to the description that he's giving Alden seems really nice If you want to come through Alden I don't know You're like find me Find me take me Alden feels like he's

In Nebraska or something like that So I don't think he Sydney fact If it has a new in it That's where Andrew's from Nebraska Yeah from the great state of Nebraska You've never heard of Nebraska

I was like honey you know the Democrats are in charge of the country again It's New Brass okay Joe Biden Kamala said Nebraska Nebraska what did you guys do today because the energy is very high is Larry also withdrawing because not withdrawals

my energy is high I mean this honestly this was the big thing on my schedule today so I more or less saved up Sydney had a bunch of appointments Sydney booked today she booked an amazing job and I got to hear an offer given to my

sis over the phone in real time also I got to watch her literally book this job like all weekend she was fielding calls for this amazing TV show actually that I'm on and yeah and Sydney Sydney was you're the one who booked I'm literally

edifying you okay whatever we can't say yet but she booked it's huge whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa Larry don't do that no Sydney don't do that no Sydney ah ah don't tell them okay wait but I mean larry you're saying that you're in the project so i feel like yeah they can put the pieces together

alden is very crafty okay they don't need everything to know larry is good at that he never gives up all the goods just give him just give him a little bit honey a lot today sydney can you drop it in the chat please i got to watch sydney get an amazing job book this job she was fielding calls and and pitching ideas and it was just so so beautiful to watch so that was a huge part of my day was watching sydney went in that way uh and sydney is creating content and she took a good old uh hour and a half nap right before this taping so i mean god bless if that's the energy we didn't do red bull today though sydney and she also made some hamburgers for lunch homemade hamburgers well done in a good in a good way because i wanted it well done crispy and then

also well done because it was nice she had the caramel onions on it so yeah sydney can cook when She's not on the show. Oh, my God. Wow. I had a burger today, too. But, Larry, this just the whole summary of Sydney's day that you were there to bear witness to was. You're talking like you're her babysitter. Honey, honey, we don't want the meds.

I was like, before I got here, I was like, get these. She was like, I'm going to get them Friday after the photo. She was like, did you get the meds? She was like, I'm going to get it coming tomorrow, Saturday. I said, are they here? She said, they're coming Sunday. I was like, all right, girl. I was like, so don't wait till I come to withdraw, honey, okay?

And then why do I want to go to the fucking ramen shop, okay? I'm in here with you and these cats, okay? I don't trust a damn thing. Marie, when I told you, he was like, uh-uh, I don't need you like that with me, okay? That's not, well, flashback to a year ago, we're in Susan Alexandra's bag shop, and we're going through a really, really emotional friendship-supportive thing of making sure that you got the things that you needed and to see you thrive and be in the zone

and be so well-supported by this thing that you knew that you needed, that you advocated for, and that your community, Marie, Amina, everyone advocated for you to get what you needed. I don't want that to be removed, that consistency. We talked about it.

Yes. I said, I don't need your mental wellness. What I value is your consistency. So one of the ways you can give me consistency is just by filling that script and taking it at the same time. And then I can handle as your friend you know the the ramens and the dot dot dots and the dot dots but like but certain things are out

of my pay grade salmon teriyaki yes yeah but you know so that's what that conversation i love i love that that y'all had that conversation because i feel like you can say it in a way that is more digestible than i can which is why i just we all have our roles well we all have our roles right but like when when she's going through what she's going through i feel like i gotta step back because I don't want to say the wrong thing because that's something that is very possible here. So I said, I'm going to send this text and then I'll get some soup with her later. Marie, that's not true. I think throughout the years, I think we filled each other out and we have the feels and we

know what to say and what not to say. I agree. I think that there's a lot of maturity and growth in your relationship when it comes to the things that matter. things that don't matter that should be petty ruckus the fuck house down boots but when things matter i feel like there's like no people who who show up and stand up for each other right show up stand up absolutely but i'm saying in terms of what you said about the prescription needing to be filled like a certain way and be taken a certain time like that is a conversation that

i feel like i've tried to have but the tone the tone the way my throat is set up it's like it's I'm like, girl, I need you to be, it's, you do this every day. Like, you do this every day. I mean, don't be fooled. Larry was in here like, girl, really? No, no, you have me out here as a girl, girl comic. And I'm like, I am that way with you, but you don't got to be selling me out there like that to them. I'm just like, girl, but everything you say, I've been like, girl, which like I do with you,

but it's just so that you don't get offended all the time. like I don't even be saying girl like that I'll be patting it Han I do like I started with that that's RuPaul no I don't even I don't even be mean I don't even be saying anything Sydney loves

to blow it up oh yes but our friend is sensitive exactly I'm double cancer so I'm sensitive too so I be trying to be sensitive to the sensitive and I still be like alright girl see that I just did one now I just did one

I just did one. I just did that. Fell into that one. Okay. That one was natural, though. When you saw how it was girl and it was very under, it wasn't like, yeah. Well, Marie, you and Larry, I think, are similar in your tones at times. So I think that.

Yeah, but I feel like you give Larry a pass that you not. It's not the same. Like, Larry, the same way that you and, like, you and Larry have a very interesting relationship. Y'all are like Will and Grace. Literally right now, like Will and Grace. because the things that I feel like Larry says to you, that's Larry.

Larry said it. It's a fact. It is what it is. I'm going to try because Larry told me to do this. I'll tell you to try something or do something or I'm like,

girl, what? You ain't been to the grocery store since 93. Like, I say something. Marie, you said that and I went to the store. Marie's calling double standard. Marie, I went to the store.

I'm not even going to push back against Marie. I'm not going to push back. I'm pointing out the double standard, but I'm also saying I appreciate it in this instance because you were able to help her through the medicine thing better than I would have been able to. For me, it was more of an investigation of why now.

I was like, you've been doing real, real good. And I was like, so why are you going to lapse it and I'm coming? I was like, no, dude, no, don't do that. That. I was like, for me, it's always as an actor. Actors, we ask why because we want to investigate the behavior so we can get inside of the world of the character Steppenwolf and Chicago Steppenwolf.

ensemble training um yes no that's my actor voice this is my comic voice honey you know i'm here on some school scoop of the boop boop but then you know when i show up you gotta drop in okay you're giving the master class not giving a master class but just investigating the psyche honey it's like i'm not a psychiatrist but i'm an actress okay so i said what's going on i was like why why ain't you filling the script honey what's going on i feel like yeah you guys are is the energy is 102 two today in the same house for several days and you know it is what it is but i i do think that i'm glad that you were there of all the people who could have been at sydney's house as a house guest right now i think i think it's good that issue larry yeah you know just doing house guest

duties well i called you i called you marie is the podcasting from the floor shut up marie is a first check and get on wellness you know house guest duties house guestings i call marie but she's the first person i call no you're no i'm not i don't know nothing about what you booked i don't know nothing about where you go that happens in this calendar day like i was here i wouldn't have known i was here i don't i don't know nothing about uh you know what time you taking the medicine i don't know y'all made burgers today i made burgers today you made burgers i made burger i had one left uh burger well because y'all didn't need to check in today because you saw each other at the ramen so yeah it's just like this was the check-in so larry

where you get the updates let's bring it back to you you with sydney right now and still wanted to go to the ramen you didn't need to be there yeah no i didn't i didn't yeah i ended up god knows god knows what we need in the end and i shouldn't be talking about it because it was god's plan from the beginning and you know i said make it seem like she didn't bring ramen back for you it's not like she came in she did she brought me ramen back but you know i didn't even want it but I still took because I didn't want to be low and petty but I almost you know you know I didn't want it I was like you know but I but I didn't I didn't I didn't want to make Sydney feel bad like I was feeling bad I didn't want to make her feel bad but I was like you know I'm from Baltimore honey I was

like all right I don't want I don't want nothing that I can't come to please so I was giving very much that energy but I took it because Sydney's my friend and I didn't want to prolong the whole thing until we got on the podcast but did you enjoy the ramen the ramen was good yeah I've been quarantining in LA for the past two months and the food is just so pale by comparison it was just where is it better

in New York, New York is giving fierceness New York is giving life, New York is giving food, they know how to do food yes this is true you gotta watch out for the ratings and stuff you wanna go and see the restaurant you're ordering from make sure there's no B or C LA has good ramen

the ramen was good but I'm just saying it was bussing here Like, yes, I've been eating good ramen for the past couple weeks, but when I ate that one from Sunday, it was bussin'. Bussin'. It was bussin'. It was bussin'. I don't know. Like, it was different.

I said, yeah. I said, I'm back, bitch. Okay? Because you don't want a fucking soup dumpling, and you can't get that. Don't order no soup dumplings around here. It's going to come out looking like a ball sack coin sack. It ain't going to come out looking like a big fluffy dough ball. You know what I mean?

It's going to come out looking like a coin sack ball sack. Okay? Uh-huh, yeah, they put the soup dumplings in a little tin, a little muffin tin, come out looking like a ball sack, scrotum sack. Oh, and those are the ones that are, like, pinched at the top. Yeah, but, like, not bulbous and fat, like, you know, you want something in there. You want soup in there.

No, no, no. They give you these little ball sack, coin sack, scrotum sack. They expect you to eat this little nasty little. How specific you are. Coin sack, scrotum sack. Ball sack, coin sack, scrotum sack. That's the pilot friend. obese and eligible um and it's sequel uh ball sack coin stack scrum sack exactly that's the

too fast too furious franchise yeah yeah yeah franchise it what would what would your franchise be pitch the pilot right now unofficial expert the pilot the unofficial expert pilot yeah you play characters based on yourselves in a big city maybe it's new york and then what do you do Pitch the pilot. Ooh, where do I work? Well, we had something that we were writing years ago. Where is that? I know they want to see it.

Comment and like and subscribe. Marie owned a sex shop, and I was, or no, was I the Uber driver? Oh, Lord. Oh, Lord, Jesus. Not you driving the Ubers. I think it was the opposite. Yeah, you were the Uber driver, but then you became a detective. And I was in the sex shop

Yeah something like that And then we And then we came We became like Like this buddy cop We were fake We were fake cops I drove an Uber

Sydney owned a sex shop We became fake cops Oh and you used Those two things To help people Solve their Disputes But there would be

It would be like The silliest Things It would be like Real murders Uh huh Okay so You would use the sex shop

And the Uber To like put everything together Yes Did y'all know each other at the top of it or did you become friends solving the crimes? We knew each other up top.

Maybe you guys don't know each other. I'm stepping in as showrunner but what if you guys don't know each other and the pilot episode we see you coming

from these like distant places coming together in the pilot so it really feels like oh my god now we're off to this whole new world

with these two together. Where do we meet? She gets in my Uber or I go to her sex shop? You tell me. I think you go to my sex shop, Marie. Funner.

Yeah. I think in the show, Marie you should be bisexual. Funner. And what are you on the show? Are you straight? Straight. Funner.

Put it away. Put it away, Doc Martens. Put it away, Lilith Fair. This is for the whites. I'm all the way lesbian, but Marie is bisexual. Lesbian, can't even pronounce it. We love it. LGBTQ.

Just say the letters. LGBTQ. Just say the letters, okay? Don't even. Honey, you're so new to you. You can't even pronounce shit, okay? Just say LGBTQs. She said, you still got that new L smell.

Not at all. I was like, and ladies, you see that that tongue is not working, so it's giving me very, very nascent LGBTQs. Call my girl and ask her. I think I'm too afraid of that. Matter of fact, I feel like she's on the line right now. Go ahead. Hon.

Hon. Hon. Hon. Call my girl and ask her. Don't push, hon. Don't push. Oh, you know, I got her number saved in my phone. I was like push I'm laying down honey I'm not even sitting upright yeah you ain't seen no push

Larry I'm so glad that we're like we all became friends after we did Las Culturistas um I don't think so honey at bell house like we saw you on stage me and Marie and we were like wait was that on my birthday I think in the summer are you yeah you're in the summer in September or was it at the oh it could be that yeah it was at bell house was that your birthday i guess i wouldn't have known because we met that night no i maybe i maybe in september yeah in september it was at some like place with like mirrors and like it was like in oh no that was the brooklyn comedy festival that was like the next year right so that i met y'all at the at the one before at the bell house and i i mean i was like like watching you two on stage just like like in

Like, in the musical theater, like, the black female voices, like, do not ring out like they do in comedy. And I was just, like, so blown away to see, like, that everyone was commanding the stage, bringing it so hard. You two looked unbelievable. Like, I was like, these are models. I was like, what are these models doing being so funny? Being so funny. And then, so, yeah, that was definitely the birth of the Love Fest. but then i mean once you all inherited the knit it was game over i was definitely a knit groupie

for you for you all because i just i just had to be there the room was always so hot i mean just like i could cry right now like it's just like truly like just being in blissful camaraderie with amazing talented black people like specifically i feel like that was like what you all represented just being like oh no i can be in the city and doing my thing and still like with my people you know in a way that musical theater made it a little bit more difficult because unless you're in a show you're not hanging out you know what i mean and like those like you get a contractor to a year but in comedy it's like every i'm seeing you every other week and then i'm just rolling up to the free show and i'm walking in the vip door okay okay i'm standing

over there with the lineup yeah yeah yeah oh my god i need a drink ticket oh yeah y'all would always take care of me yeah y'all would take care of me with little tickets and then we would and then we'd go to the diner after uh yeah y'all would take care of me yeah yeah larry do you remember what your i don't think so honey was because i remember that's yeah i remember that it was i don't think so honey chicago pizza or new york pizza was new york pizza it was something super dumb it was new york pizza versus chicago pizza yeah yeah i just had your you had your camo jacket on and you had your camo crocs on too yes that was the that was my fit yes oh my god i remember larry on stage i said no larry was so fucking good on stage i was like who is this

person i i want to be his friend he's incredible you i had not done a set at that point like i literally had not like i had not done a lineup or a set at that point i was just like there and i I was like, what is this world? This is so amazing. And you were singing. You sang. It was crazy. You sang everything in a minute.

You got to use the crutch, honey, okay? You got to use the crutch. You got to use what you got to get what you want on it. You got to get a gimmick to get ahead, okay? And Maryse, I don't think so, honey, was, what's that woman who played Catwoman that wasn't Michelle? Halle Berry? Halle Berry.

Not Halle Berry, though. Anne Hathaway. Anne Hathaway. You said, I don't think so, Anne Hathaway. and mine was Brad Pitt and we were like back to back yes y'all

y'all came for ruckus that's what I remember it was like the particular ruckus we were messy boots well because Anne Hathaway as Catwoman

there's no sex appeal there for me and I was like I don't no I mean I'll take Michelle Pfeiffer right now

as Catwoman absolutely hard to agree across the Americas I was so nervous I was like I have to go after Marie this is a nightmare

no it was all slayage it was good it was hot crowd sold out looks on duane perkins is there in a unbelievable i was i literally it felt like walking into oz like like the land of oz like the world's black and white and now it's like suddenly tech i was like where like sonia denny i think was there i think there's a picture of like like me sonia duane and maybe even youtube and we're as if we've known each other for 10 years it's a mindy and it's like no we like i met everyone that night oh i love that i think that's the night i met duane too yeah i met him that night too and i was like oh man we it was just a group of people that i was like oh marie

we don't need we don't know these peeps you know i love a new black face i don't need any more straight male friends absolutely absolutely wait so what was y'all circles before then very um um oh we were we were in some straight rooms some miscellaneous miscellaneous situations and hands down marie hands down i mean the good thing is that i what i loved about me and marie is that we would go to places and no matter what the vibe was it we turned the vibe oh yeah we come in and it'd be like oh sitting right here it's it's about to get now it's a show I feel like people will start doing their good material

they're like I'm not going to do this people will start doing a set they're trying to get booked the room would change suddenly there's industry in the house Sydney and Marie's here but also me and Sydney are bringing an energy into the room that wasn't there before

we're laughing at stuff you know what I mean you know what a comedy show or an open mic was back in the day Actually, I've never been to one. Sorry, I never did any open mics. Okay, well, let me describe it to you. Yeah, sorry.

I was brought right into lineups from that. I don't think so. Well, that's what happens when you kill at the first thing, friend. Yeah, yeah. You can't drop the ball, though. You can't drop the ball. If I dropped the ball, you know, I would be over in the theater basket. So how did you get booked on that show if you had never done stand-up before?

One night, I, like, walked into the duplex, and, like, and all of the, you know, the gay literati was there like all of your name brand uh queer comics and i you know i pulled out some pulled out some word perfect sondheim and they were you know everyone it was received well and but like i like wasn't identifying as a comic i like didn't even know that i could do it and then yeah and bowen and matt were there so i think i think that's it i think that that that scans that's crazy that scan because it was their show yeah but yeah tell us about open mics what was that like yeah tell us aunt marie before the before the before the great pandem we used to walk all the way to open nights you used to walk we used to walk miles in what type of shoes on bare

feet i haven't put on shoes in weeks auntie oh my god yeah on things called shoes and sometimes they had heels on them heels i think that's the thing about the pandem that is gonna affect us maybe more than we know is all the people who haven't been wearing anything any type of heel or boot or get that bunion back the oh the foot is gonna be crying and the knee is gonna be screaming why did that kill me the foot is going to be crying and the knee is gonna be screaming it kills me because like to me it's just so foreign like just like the idea like i don't even like to stand up too long so like the idea that like you're both your feet and your knees would hurt and you would be like but that's the gay and sometimes you're back but sydney used to

throw on a boot and walk well she didn't really walk that much but we would we would wander the streets of new york and sydney would have on a heel all day yeah she could she could do she could do a 15 minute stretch um on the sidewalk in the peeled boot yeah larry larry said that i was short today and he's like why are you so short and i was like because i was so tall all those years and yeah i never saw her in a flat shoe she walked around these rebox and a juicy sweatsuit and i'm I'm like, who is this fat-ass nymph? Who? Who'd you say?

Marseille Martin? Yes. Marseille. You said Marseille. No. Not Marseille. Young mogul. Young producer.

Yeah. Guinness World Record youngest producer ever in a movie. Come on. I saw that on her page today. Women's History Day. That's history. That's herstory. Okay, gals?

that's history and we're and let i just want to know i would just want everybody to know you heard it here first we are making history we're making history right now no marseille no what y'all doing us as well what you're doing what are we doing what are we doing yeah wait clarify wait go on sis what'd you say andrew slick you said something slick i said how are we making history this is the third time that you've been on. Oh, okay. I thought you said how long Larry's been on.

I was like, oh, this is running long to you. Okay, I'm about to come right through the Zoom. Zoom, Zoom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Okay? No. Zoom, Zoom, Zoom, Zoom. No, there are other three timers. I know that Carolina's been on at least three times.

I don't know. She did lingerie. She did freak shit. And then what did she do for the third one? Y'all been here. She was on it a third time. Those are her two? She'd be in and out of Sidney's house talking in the background.

Yeah. I know she has at least two. Paris Hachet? I think Paris has to be a three-timer. No, she did the live show, but she didn't do... Is that taped and released? I feel like Amina has done five-timers. I feel like maybe Amina, maybe Mateo.

Because Amina came on with her sister. Yeah, she might. And she was frugal. Marie she's a five timer on the unofficial expert it's the SNL for black comics I think so yeah definitely

she's the Alec Baldwin of all the guests we've ever had Alex maybe Alex is a three no Alex is two Alex is two that's gonna be historic cause y'all don't even like repeat guests

no we do we like our friends honestly that's it new people now I'm like oh actually I'm scrolling the Kanisha episode bougie expert that that raised a lot of hairs yeah

that caused a lot of ruckus out in expert land why why they just were they were the experts were calling classism they were I think the experts were hearing in tone classism but I wasn't hearing in tone because I speak I speak code switch black

you know what i mean and it just like the words always come out sounding sharp you know what i mean depending on your code switch um the same way that you know if i talk in my baltimore accent it sounds a little hard you know a little harsh same thing but oh no my my girl kanesha gives she gives she's she's cut she's cut throat at times she gives upper crush she gives you know zero percent fat bmi of two uneligible for the vaccine she gives like she gives like highly uneligible for the vaccine tease but in a gorge way yes but

now she's doing it on skates the skate wait hold on skates are back and somebody tell me what's going on with the roller skates okay because I just seen about 4, 5, 6 adults adult people in a roller skate Jada Pinkett was roller skating over the camera and another camera was

Jada Jada everyone has on rollers yeah because this is cool yeah and we have to get we have to be mobile we have to move around and some people don't like the gym and skating gives you all of it it's a full body workout oh really yeah skating is back in a huge way it's back because black girls made skating back black girls on skates is a whole it's a way of life now the videos are awesome sydney you're tired you took a nap girl you tired again

they came back around excuse me house guests um i think close friend i think close friends green circle green circle close friends no you're a house guest close friends i gotta pee we gotta wrap this up i could be here all night in fact i am i'm giving you very much give me very much that energy no kinesha she was on sit can cook and she had the white bay in the background and i followed her and then i went to her page last month during bhm and he was gone from her page was that a choice for BHM

like if I look now is he back he's in the stories I think I'm gonna ask stories only I think he's in the stories well people said

that they want Kanisha to come back for a part two because they were like she so we hide White Bay I mean Coleman Domingo

came out with a non-black bay and they were upset about that were they yeah he was Latin but they were like

but he's white presenting this bay But his name was Raul Who are y'all talking about So it clears Yeah but so is Hilaria No keep my name out of it honey

Okay Keep your name out of it why Hilaria I heard it When you say it quick I hear it Larry I hear it Larry I hear it Okay so Okay so Coleman came out

I'm looking at the bae. He look Hispanic. He look like a little, you know, a bitty, bitty bamba. You know, lucky speaking. Yeah, he's giving that. Oh, talk about that, Andrew. Craigslist. Talk more about it.

What does that mean? I'm talking about these things. So I think that they, like, saw each other at a Walgreens or something while shopping for, like, face masks. And then went on Craigslist and was like, hey, is anybody on here that happened to be at the Walgreens shopping for face masks? And they were like, yes. and the connection was made, another married. Y'all gays know how to cruise. I did read about that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The gays know how to fucking cruise. It don't matter where we at. We could be in a freaking nursery. You could be in a clinic. Y'all are cruising. Eyes are always open. Misconnection.

Gay, not blind. Imagine jumping on misconnections to see if you saw somebody. Like, what? Gay, not blind. Misconnections. Wow. I will say that I've checked it before

and I've never seen myself on it. So, you know. Should I check too? Sometimes I'll be like, well, I was on the train. Was I wearing a green vest? And then I'll be like, I don't have any vests.

Honestly, I'm glad you told the story, Andrew, because I thought it was in the M4M, not the Miss Connect. I thought they were being progressively open. I'll be like, we met M4M. The hookup went right. And that's bae. But like, okay, it's a much more twee,

much more modern love, wink, wink. easter egg it was much more modern love um sort of uh misconnection vibe wow that's wild would you guys check misconnections should we check it right now check it right now i haven't been out the house marie i feel like someone saw me through the window very creepy you you're wearing tennis shorts and a sweatshirt for no reason wearing a sweatshirt but no pants and you're like oh that's me what's you're recording a podcast next to the person who was also on the pod what'd you say marie there's no way you couldn't have had a misconnection because like i swear that people look at you sometimes and think that there's a vibe and then there is no

vibe yeah but those people usually will come up to me and be like hey i felt like we locked eyes while you were on stage. And I'd be like, no, we didn't. We definitely didn't do that. I was staring blissfully into the void thinking about my jokes.

Marie, you look amazing. Thank you, sis. I think it's the wig. But also the makeup. You're giving me Tiana Taylor vibes. Oh. Bopodo.

Bopodo! Oh, my God. You're giving me Tiana Taylor vibes. This is my fun fact. Original nose. isn't that crazy Tiana Taylor

was amazing in Coming to America besides Leslie Jones she was my favorite part she was so good as this character Bopodo who has very few lines one of her lines is like I will serve my husband I will do what he says I will stay right here and I said yes bitch

that's me representation on film I will stand right here for my husband okay let me read let me read a misconnection for Astoria Queens posted seven hours ago okay okay the title older woman with stroller at mcdonald's so already a horror story um they're at mcdonald's right uh i saw you at mcdonald's today on steinway you were older had a stroller and were very beautiful i held the door open for you on the way out if you see this please contact me cute that's cute to me it's very respectful i mean sure but

Like, sis had a stroller. She not thinking about you. She trying to get her. Yeah, she's not checking the misconnection. She trying to get her McChicken, her McNuggets, and you know the slushie machine is broken. So. Anyway, one day I'm going to write one

and then I'm going to see if anybody hits me up. Marie, I dare you. I think you would be hilarious doing that just for fun. Like, you weren't really trying to get a connection, but you were just. Yeah, girl, flash some eyes that remember their outfit type it up i'm just gonna make it up you got a little show going a little one-woman show you had dreads and one of them was really loose

your pants your pants boot cut yeah yeah your new balance were scuffed oh that's me that could be me um anyway whatever i still do need to so i think we need to i love it that's the best reason of any to get out of here because i'm having so much fun i could do this all night as i said before larry tell people where to follow you per favor yeah you can follow me at larry owens live on all platforms larry owens live and uh anything coming out we should be looking forward to um look out for sydney's press release and i'm on that show girl bye anyways um i'm okay so anyway larry can you say one good thing about unofficial expert because the people need to know um it saved my life

i don't know where i would be without you too there are so many dark nights that all i can do is just fire up my iphone and think to type in on you and oh and then i click play on spotify and then i'm immediately transported back to being at the knit or being at the diner or being at that first i don't think so honey show and you two are just so special and andrew you are too and the world that you've created is so spectacular congrats on getting through pandemic and see Hey, Larry, that was a great monologue that you just did. You going to do that for Dramatic Rules? Yes.

I tried to eat the grape and I couldn't get it out. That was great. Eat the grape. Thank you. Eat the grape. Eat the grape, Anna Mae. Eat the grape. That was fantastic.

Thank you. Everybody, you have to review, comment, subscribe, all that good stuff. More people need to know about us. It's crazy. I feel like we're the reposts. And America and the world, this is your assignment for this episode. After this airs, I need one person to hit us with a message about Larry that's as glowing as Alden's was about Andrew.

How about that? Yeah. Don't do it, swim fan. No swim fan. Yeah. No. I want somebody to, yes. Because Larry, you got fans too, so it might could be somebody

that's sliding over from Larry Owens live. that's like aww say hi say hi five star review and say this is for Larry they deserve actually no

the name of your review should be Salmon Teriyaki Salmon Salmon oh my god okay love you guys thank you

bye forever dog this has been a forever dog production The Unofficial Expert is executive produced by Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. Senior producer, Tracy Sorin. Produced by Andrew McGuire.

Cover art by Sandy Honig. To listen to this podcast ad-free, sign up for Forever Dog Plus at foreverdogpodcasts.com slash plus. check out video clips of our podcasts on youtube at youtube.com slash forever dog team and make sure to follow us on twitter instagram and facebook at forever dog team to keep up with all the latest forever dog news