Middle-aged opinion - Mother-in-law from hell

Episode Date: February 26, 2025

Today we discuss mother-in-law is from Hell why do they insist on making our life so difficult when all we’re trying to do is get on with ours. So much unwonted advice. So much backchat and generally horrid opinion. We hope you enjoyed today’s episode.

Wow, what do you think of that? What don't you think of that? Well I think that girl has got everything that she deserves. Right. Yeah. Fluff. What do I look like? I look... I looked in the mirror earlier at school once I come out of... well came in from... all that cold and all I could see was these two lines. Okay. They looked so deep earlier. That's because you were probably frowning. Was I laughing? No frowning. Oh was it so cold that I was scrunching my face? It was freezing, it was painful. They were

so deep. I got back after the run. Had you fixed that? Botox. I got back after the run and I was like I need a bath and I actually shampooed my hair because when I took it out the ponytail it stayed in the ponytail I was like it's definitely time for a shampoo but I didn't want it down so I just tidied it. Oh I cut about an inch and a half off tonight as well give it a trim about that much so it's my birthday in it so I was like cut that off it's still very very long but it feels short to me now we're like I'm practically bald I look dead I look dead today I got a makeup I

always do not face face makeup blush out mascara Get my liner No, I like that. I am tired though. I'm very tired I just like can't get out of this tiredness like last night fell asleep quite early And I had had a nap in the day, so I felt this earlier. I was like last year We were just so fucking busy. Yeah, I feel like it's caught up I thought maybe it's just caught up a little bit. Yeah, I'm not sad. I'm not no bad place. I'm just so fucking busy. Yeah. I feel like it's caught up. I feel like maybe it's just caught up a little bit. Yeah. Like I'm not sad.

I'm not in a bad place. I'm just tired. I'm tired and a bit of a hermit. Like I'm good just chilling, doing my own thing. I just want to do stuff. Are you going to go for a drink at all this weekend? No. No?

No. I don't want to. I just don't want to. You don't want to. No, not even all weatherspoons. Don't want to. I just don't want to. You don't want to. You don't want to eat all the weatherspoons. Don't want to. I just want to chill, do my thing. Wonder if the council is ever going to come and do the work after I strip my lounge back, you know, that sort of thing. They said they'd email but nothing, so I'm gonna have to email them on Monday and be like, you said it's starting this week, so what day is that then? I've stripped the lounge like you asked me to. This week coming.

Coming oh. Yeah. And then Alfie freaking out and just like well it's not like I want you back it's just there's no room for you to come back to. Yeah please not this week. Yeah come have a breakdown next month. He said the whole cookie thing doesn't help, but he'll be all right. He will be all right. Yeah, that's what I said to me. He'll be all right.

I feel like he'd be better if he got himself a girlfriend. I'm like, get yourself a girlfriend, mate. Bide your time. You know, just... Well, it just makes you feel like you belong a little bit more, do you know what I mean? Rather than being on your own all the time. Poor boy.

Right, you're starting today. Are we ready? Um yeah. Okay. Hello everyone and welcome to middle aged opinion. I wasn't ready hang on. Everyone's my witness. Oh it was you that suggested the title for the What's Thing Inside Me and I'd forgotten what you suggested and called it something else. I don't feel like I suggested it, I feel like I just said something and you're like oh my god. Yeah yeah. So I didn't suggest anything. But the idea came from you, you put the idea in my head. I put it in your head. That's what I'm saying. I rolled with it. This is what we do. Well that's one of my favourite episodes ever. It's so funny. Right anyway, are you ready? Yeah I'm ready. Hello everyone and welcome to Middle

Age Opinion. I'm your host Ellie. And I'm your host Emily and today we are looking at mother-in-laws from hell or hellish mother-in-laws. Yes. Do you have a mother-in-law? Did you have a mother-in-law from hell? I don't feel like I had one from hell. I got on really well with her I felt anyway. But she certainly had her ways about her that you know there was few things that I was like no I don't agree. Yeah. But she wasn't awful. So my mother-in-law, I wouldn't say was awful to me, more awful to my husband. And I'd say just that I could never understand the parenting.

No, I think if she was still alive, I'd be like, we probably wouldn't be friends. No, yeah. But I think the way that things happen with with Paul is just says everything that needs to go But not so much towards me more towards her son Yeah, anyway Right, you are kicking us off. Am I going first? I'm wondering if we've got the same. There were some really good ones I enjoyed this it was easy to read and get through and I just kicked off the internet's gone down It's because I closed the door too much it was easy to read and get through and I just kicked off the internet's gone down

just because I closed the door too much but yeah I I didn't struggle with this okay it's okay come on oh you saved loads no I didn't I might have you saved loads loads No I didn't! I might have. You saved loads. Loads and loads. I always enjoy this one though. I do really enjoy this one. So do I but that's like, that's fucking loads babe. It's a little bit long. I saved four. It's a little bit long. I think I've saved six. Okay. Because I was worried that what if we had three the same. I mean it could happen. I mean it hasn't. Not yet but we have had some the same babe. Yeah but we've had enough to go to go around it. Okay so my mother-in-law is

insane. That'd be mine, she's right about mine. It's come from, sorry, it's come from mother-in-law from hell on reddit. So I appreciate and come into reddit commentary that it literally set up to discuss mother-in-law from hell. So I appreciate the bar is somewhat set already but I come to you with this Christmas with this Christmas highlights of 48 hours with my mother-in-law from hell in no particular order largely because I cannot decide which is the most insane example announcing that Christmas is ruined because brother-in-law the vegetarian hosted and served a vegetarian feast okay ruined yes ruin the whole Christmas although I really I'm not gonna lie I don't I really love the veg at Christmas I think I don't have those so actually I'm happy veg. I just don't feel like, I feel like I'd miss the meat.

But I like the bacon that's on. The sausages. That's not, that's not, that's not vegetable, is it? Yeah. In sprouts I put. That sounds amazing, yeah. Yeah, I'd sometimes do that. Always.

And bacon. Bacon. With sausages. Bacon. I have pork on everything actually yeah on the turkey yeah yeah bacon on the bacon I just love that I love the taste of meat so I would miss it I wouldn't say it'd be ruined but I definitely yeah yeah yeah insisting that her vegetables were boiled and not roasted because they might be roasted in goose fat.

I roasted for the first time in goose fat this year. It is a game changer. It was good, my potatoes were good. It is a game changer. We buy that as well, and duck fat. Only Christmas though. Yeah, no, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They were good.

Look, we're getting so excited. I'm thinking about my tory. My tory. I've been trying to break everything. yeah yeah yeah they were good look we're getting so excited I'm thinking about my Toby! I've been trying to brighten everything up. We've booked Toby after if you want me to. Yeah. I've got a sense of me. I've got Max on our way home because there's one there's one that isn't that far away but this is on our way back. Yeah okay. Right anyway back to your story sorry. Right, anyway back to your story, sorry. Right, sorry. Having a tantrum on discovering that there were two bottles of red wine to accompany

Christmas lunch and not a bottle of red and a bottle of white. She doesn't drink. Okay. Fucking insane. Similar tantrum on discovering that we bought cider with us because they bought cider too and father-in-law wanted beer. Again, she doesn't drink and father-in-law was not remotely bothered. Provided a massive stocking full of Santa presents for our three-year-old, only biological grandchild. I have a three-year-old. Only biological grandchild I have a 17 year old also. In our house Santa brings small treats, books and

candy and proper presents are from friends and family. So three-year-old got the usual stocking from us plus a surprise second stocking from Santa. Three-year-old had a vomiting bug on Saturday and Sunday. 17 year old then got sick on Monday. We traveled on the Tuesday. 70 year old was sick just once and gets regular migraines that cause vomiting and as they were fine on the Tuesday morning we opted to travel as planned. Mother-in-law behaved as though we had travelled with both Ebola and Zika?

Zika? Yeah yeah yeah. Zika virus. Is it Zika? Yeah. With a side of Covid thrown in. Responded again with that we had ruined Christmas. Yeah this bitch.

And that if she called it she would need to be hospitalized due to her medical issues. Her only actual medical issue is hysterical hypochondria. As per above if we had made the decision not to travel we would have also ruined Christmas so we were in a no-win situation. We were accused of not putting enough thought into their presents. We bought them both vouchers which is exactly what they asked for. Our received presents clearly had a lot more thought put into them. Father-in-law transferred us each £20 whilst we unwrapped our other gifts.

Cheers dad. Brother-in-law doesn't have a TV license. They've got a little explanation of that for those who don't know it's an outdated requirement in the UK to watch certain channels that lots of people don't bother with anymore. Given the huge variety of streaming TV channels now, very much a hung up hangover from when we used to have free channels and no internet. This meant Mother-in-law couldn't watch her programs over Christmas, again ruined Christmas. We bought the wrong party food

and she couldn't eat any of it. She could, she was just being difficult for the sake of being difficult, sounds like that was her objective of the day. I feel like it's her MO in life, she's a Karen. Brother-in-law doesn't have a microwave I'm pretty sure, this is just to wind up his parents at this point. Yeah. Yeah it is an issue on every visit Mother-in-law took my partner aside before we left and told him she is bitterly disappointed in him and me because of all the gigs we take our three

year old to. It's all over Facebook and everyone is talking about it and it's embarrassing. Yeah, massively. talking about it and it's embarrassing. For the record we go to a lot of gigs, it's our thing. Our three-year-old has been to one gig ever and an acoustic family focus gig two years ago. We also take her to a family-friendly music festival every year. Mother-in-law was so upset about this music festival every year. Mother-in-law was so upset about this she refused to speak to us again before we left and refused to say goodbye to any of us including her only grandchild. So yeah that was less than 48 hours with the in-laws this Christmas. Brother-in-law has already booked to leave the country next Christmas and will likely be working And I will likely be working if not, we will also be leaving the country I

Think and the mummy Laura's just hell-bent on being miserable. No matter what the situation Why aren't they just just no matter what babe, whether it's Christmas or Easter, there's a problem no matter what. I just don't get people like that. Why can't you be happy that your family's all together? Just miserable no matter what. Because you're the shit that you're eating. And while we're on the subject, TV license, they've just changed the rules for that, haven't they? I don't know.

Netflix, any of it, you now have to have a TV license. I think if you have a TV and you watch... TV. Like TV. Yeah, you've got to have a TV license. I think if you have a TV and you watch TV like TV yeah you've got to have a TV license now they've just changed it. And it's gone like a little bit hasn't it? I don't know Paul pays for that. I don't pay for that. Direct debit he pays for that. But yeah I am I think no matter what the circumstance she is miserable no matter what and doesn't find joy in anything and can you imagine being around that all the time? No, I'd be like, may I go home? Like cheer up. Like I feel like I'd I would have to get someone to make her a special cake. Yeah maybe that would just

say stop being a cunt. No a special cake, A special cake. Oh I mean that would be hilarious. That would be more fun. That would be hilarious, yeah. Not vegetarian. But I feel like, I also feel like she's not treating, because the 17 year old I'm assuming is from a previous relationship and I'm getting the feeling that that child is not treated in a similar way. Yeah because a couple of times it was her only grandchild. Yes, biological grandchild. Which is a bit shy. Yeah, because they are brother and sister and that child is part of the family now,

whether she likes it or not. But she does give the, no matter what you're doing, there's no satisfaction. No. What a shame. I know. Because I bet she doesn't see them all year long. That's what I mean. She has to stalk them on Facebook and then she's embarrassed by that as well.

I don't get the gig thing because it's perfectly normal to take your child to a gig. I mean some people take their children to Glastonbury. There's so many family friendly gigs now. Yeah, yeah. And she needs to mind her own business. What's top comment? Your mother-in-law is really out to lunch what a killjoy I would neither invite nor join her in any holiday party ever I'd

also restrict or unfriend her from your Facebook since she claims she's so offended and embarrassed by what she sees yeah and then the next one says, wow I don't blame you for making other plans now. What an idiotic or idiotic woman. She won't be happy next year either when no one is there at all. In fact, she sounds like she doesn't know how to be happy or appreciative about anything or anyone. She needs to learn how to count her blessings instead of her criticisms. Good idea to give her plenty of space to do that alone." There's nothing they can do for that though. She is just generally a miserable person that finds fault in everything. There is no way around it at all unfortunately. No, OP replied and said one of my friends summed it up perfectly it must be exhausting being that miserable all of

the time and I think she's absolutely right. Yeah, yeah just out and out miserable woman. Do you think, a slight flip, do you think that her children have left home and gone their own ways of making like their own choices that actually she feels just out of control of her family, that she's just sniping at everything, that actually it's not because she's hideous but it's because she's lonely. Maybe but that is not the way to get your family back is it? I can imagine because we both have boys so we are going to be the mother-in-law which generally falls under the my mother-in-law and I'm hoping that I'm not like any of these women. Well, can I say for definite, no.

But I'm hoping that I'm not like my little baby boy doing it all wrong. But I don't know, because obviously I'm not in that situation, but it worries me. Because I don't wanna be one of those bitter twisted, I wanna be fair as fair. She's got her family, Alfie's got his family, and hopefully we can all come together.

But Alfie, she's you, mate. Yeah, she's you. I don't know, he's the his family and hopefully we can all come together but... Alfie, shoe mate. Yeah, shoe. I don't know, he's the one that gives me the whole, like when you meet someone it's gonna be, you know, like a deep thing. Yeah. Because he's quite a deep boy. Right, are we ready? Yeah. Right. Mother-in-law freaked out at the hospital.

My wife gave birth two days ago via C-section. She is in rough shape and it's been 36 hours of no sleep. Her mother lives close by and always has been rude and abusive with the fuck you attitude to everyone. I have tolerated this over the years and abusive with the fuck you attitude to everyone. I have tolerated this over the years and I see her frequently because we live very close to her. Today she came into the hospital

30 minutes before visiting hours. I was shirtless holding our two day old baby doing skin to skin contact on the chair. And she comes into the room, holds her keys in front of me and says I parked the car up front you need to go and move my car to which I said no I'm holding our baby she then went on to berate me calling me an arsehole telling me you do what I tell you to do whenever I tell you to do it. She goes

on to be extremely passive aggressive and nasty to me even when I try to calm the situation down and reason with her. My wife starts to cry and tells us both to stop. I am floored by the situation and decided to leave the hospital telling my wife I will not be in the same room as her mother. I am so frustrated that her mother brought so many negative attitudes to what should have been such a wonderful time for me and my wife and that I have together with our newborn. She texts me later in the day to apologize, but I cannot get over this in my head.

I never want to see her again, but of course I will have to put up with it and see her the next day. How do I get over this and move on for myself? I hate that I feel angry and I just want everything to go back to being happy and joyful. She just she destroyed one of those very first core memories didn't she? She destroyed a really really special moment because a lot of dads don't get the same buzz.

Yeah but they don't get like, it's not like when we have a baby, we hold the baby first of all and all of that sort of thing. That was a really special moment for him. And she's like, move my car. Bang. Do it, just hold. Yeah.

I just don't know who the fuck she thinks she is. Sorry, what? Yeah. Where's that buzz? You'd be buzzing the midwife, please get her out. Yeah, I don't know. Get her out. Yeah, but I feel sorry for the woman as well

because she doesn't want this conflict. Do you know what I mean? So it makes me feel sorry for her because she don't know what to do, does she? It would have been easier to say mum leave. Yeah, mum don't move your own car, don't start. Come back in a minute. Yeah, when you've called down.

Right, so top comment says, literally, your kid can't grow up witnessing such toxic behaviour. A serious conversation with your wife is needed. Maybe suggest therapy, couple sessions, but right now focus on her postpartum recovery and the baby's wellbeing. Limit mother-in-law visits at the home and make her leave immediately if she misbehaves. Cross the lines of disrespect if she has any towards yourselves. Your mother-in-law is an a-hole with control

issues which is playing power games. Show her that you will not tolerate her bad behaviour anymore. Yeah, serious. I feel like, again, that's an easier said than done thing. Yeah it is yeah because we all know what needs to happen here. Yes. But it just isn't. And this is coming from his point of view we don't know the relationship between the daughter and the mum whether there's any toxicity there and how she copes with. The image I'm getting is she's swung in, do my car, give me my baby. I feel like it's her and I think if he hadn't... Like an entitled thing. If she had had the baby and he hadn't, I think maybe she would have gone here and she would

have had everything she wanted. Of course. But that weren't the situation and actually she got put back in a spot. And the thing is, had she had come in the room and said, oh love, I parked the car out the front, would you mind moving it for me? Again, that is a completely different scenario. But even walk in, read the room first,

and be like, oh, this is wonderful. Yeah. Oh, do you know what? Yeah. And he could be like give me a minute yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah even can you that's what I'm saying is the actually even ask yeah she's gone in she's gone in with a really negative vibe and they get aura negative five and that's what's happened she's gone in

she's like bitch bitch and he's like who who the fuck? Who the fuck? And you say, I get like that. You're like, no! Don't do that. But you get what I'm saying? Like someone comes in and does that to you, I'd be like, get the keys and chuck them in their face. I remember, I can't go fully into it, but when Paul was in hospital, it was quite funny. She says.

Now. Yeah, now. And Lisa had come all the way down From Hastings and I was I couldn't relax. So this was the day they were taking out the breathing tube Yeah, I mean, I'm sure I spoke to you about it at the time. So they're taking out the breathing tube they don't know if Paul's gonna be able to breathe for himself because Often the lungs can collapse. So anyway, oh, we're not allowed in there and I'm waiting and I'm laying on Lisa's lap and then somebody goes,

oh my God, French, this is an example because I can't say it, French just text, look Ellie, Ellie look, look, Ellie look at that. And I was, no when you're like, because I can't, I don't care if the Queen is text, right? I am like, bear in mind the people that I'm talking about that text didn't bother phoning coming up nothing. I couldn't give a tiny rat's fucking ass. Yeah. And I'm laying there and I'm trying to and

Lisa's not saying anything, which is not like Lisa. Do you know what I mean? And then I take the phone like that and go, yeah, that's great. Lisa said to me, I thought you were going to fucking lobby across the room. I did I did I was so angry I was so angry because I thought how can your mind be anywhere but on this situation that's happening now and people are so strange in situations like like read the room like you said people it was like that it was like look look look and I was just laying there like oh my god oh my god I'm gonna kill him I'm gonna get Like who said? It was like that, it was like look, look, look! And I was just laying there like oh my god, oh my god, I'm gonna kill him, I'm gonna get... It's you that's gonna be in his head of care.

You are the next person in his head of care! You're worth the time I will do in prison. It was funny because me and Lisa were talking about this not that long ago and I said I don't know how you... Because she's not the calmest. I was like I don't know how you because she's not the calmest yeah she's I was like I don't know how you staying stayed so calm she was like cuz you were on that I'm never on the edge if you know me takes a lot in it for me to she was like you were ready to get arrested she was like I was remaining calm before you made him eat it and I was like alright fair play, down the throat

someone else can't breathe. Might have even waited a few minutes to tell someone. Yeah but that is the kind of that is the kind of story it's giving me read the room exactly what you said do you know what I mean like people have different emotions and you are in there stating it's all about me when it's actually nothing to do with you. My grandchild, my me. Yeah yes it is your grandchild but your son-in-law is sitting with their baby. Yeah having a real special bonding moment. Yeah I do like that story it's so funny. Good times. It was well funny, babe, now we look back. Yeah, it's a now situation.

Yeah, now we look back. Yeah. Someone might have died. Yeah, now we look back. We're like, I was just like, I don't know how you were so calm, she was like, cause I had to be, she was like, I could feel like,

she was like, your whole body was like, mate. Ha ha ha. Look, look, they text text who gives a fuck where are they they don't give a fuck fuck off good times anyway yeah moving on like bringing up her memories it's okay it's okay but you like getting stressed about that made that go in my mind yeah because i'd be the same i don't do that yeah it just reminded me of that story because i was like that i was like we're nuts aren't we yeah people are fucking nuts way because i feel like i'm the kind of person you're the kind of person

pretty much our whole group it takes quite a lot to reach that that limit you know i mean like we're quite tolerable and in any relationship we've had we've been very welcoming and open and tolerant so for someone to push you to you to that place where this man is, tells you enough sin, yeah, because you're like, it's not as simple as going fuck off. It's not. It's harder than that because you've got to think of the other person. It'd be like your ex-husband and your mum, he has to then think about the feelings of your mum and how that's going to affect your relationship. And I think a lot of these stories, it's the same in that

no matter what's going on, that child of that mother-in-law being, depending on whatever side is always affected. It's hard. Okay. Anyway, that's the therapy over for today. I feel so much more relaxed now. Yeah. Literally blind with rage right now. There you go. It's not about you. This is so incalculable. That was a good day.

My monster in law from the depths of hell is making me blind with rage. My husband 29 male and myself 29 female have been together for 8 years with 2 kids. 3 years ago we relocated to his hometown to be closer to his family and to his and his children's culture. They are First Nations. I don't know what that means. Should I Google it? I don't know what that means. First Nations? I feel like that gives me America but I bet you it's not. Yeah, I feel like it's some sort of American cult. Sorry. We've got First Nation Bank. Maybe. What shall I say? culture? Culture. Right, his mother and I, in the beginning of our relationship, did not get along and she didn't like that I was white. Okay. Over time, I thought-

I've got it. They're the first mountain men, first European to enter the area like Yellowstone and all that so I mean I want to say indigenous. I'm gonna say of color of because she's saying mother-in-law didn't like because she was white. Okay yeah. Okay yeah so indigenous. Over time I thought we had developed a relationship to some extent. Well today I have learned that not only are we not okay that she's an actual horrible person. Two weeks ago mine and my husband's, oh I hate that, my husband and I, mine, vehicle, oh you're confusing me. Anyway I'll read as it is, yeah mine and my husband's vehicle broke down right for eternity so we decided to finance two used vehicles as that was the best option for us. I have only credit, I have okay credit, he has no credit so his mum offered to co-sign on his vehicle a My friend Doug just so happens to be a salesman that gets wicked good deals

wicked good deals for people that are rebuilding their credit so we applied through him the bank called and said they would give us a better rate if myself, my husband and my mother-in-law, I'm going to call her Rachel, went on the contract and that in 12 months after positive payments Rachel and I could come off and the truck and off off of the truck and she would come off the SUV. She agreed. I was so thankful to her and told her how gracious she was was being. Doug sent over the paperwork to sign and we have Rachel on speakerphone. He starts telling us the payments and I'm literally amazed because they are dirt cheap. Then Rachel backed out. I was like okay no biggie I will pay more for the SUV

but my husband needed her for the truck still. The next day Doug calls her to follow up and let her know that they just got a trade in on a different truck which fits what my husband was looking for better same price. She then tells Doug we need a neutral third party. Doug was confused because he is a literal stranger to her so he has a colleague come sit in stranger to her so he has a colleague come sit in on the call where she says that bitch doesn't deserve an SUV. Her rich parents can buy anything cash they are retired living in a two-bedroom condo. She spent all the money raised for her on GoFundMe on herself while my grandchildren suffered. I was a paralysed last year in hospital for six months diagnosed with terminal illness.

I also was in a hospital where no delivery services were available so it would have been impossible to spend 5k all on myself. She's trying to rip me off on the truck is what the mother-in-law just said. Doug literally offered a 2023 ram for 35k and to pay her 2000 upon signing. Her parents don't love and respect my grandchildren. I would never buy anything from one of her friends. I don't even know what or how to feel right now apart from embarrassment, anger and anxiety. I'm already looking at us moving. I mean they got a little bit confusing with who was saying what. So I think I've got it. So the daughter-in-law and the husband were buying two trucks. The husband's got bad credit so he needed

the mum and the wife to co-sign on the loan to get the truck. The mum- He was getting the truck, she was getting the SUV. Yeah, so the mum then changed her mind and said, that bitch is trying to rip me off. And her mum and dad have got so much money, they can buy anything cash. Yeah. So, that's kind of where I'm at. I'm right.

So- Is the truck 35,000 pounds? 35,000, yeah. Fucking hell. right so but it's a truck 35 000 pounds 35k yeah okay no yeah so they are the first they are the first nation community and they in a indigenous people in canada that's that they are um yeah okay fine but they are indigenous so like a tribe do you know what I mean? So basically... Did you get a bit confused? Only when it was when she switched to dear who was saying wharf because she wasn't... So the mummy lord doesn't like her because

she's white doesn't like her because she's white doesn't like it because of her culture feels like so she feels like she received a whole bunch of money yeah whilst she was in hospital and don't find me because she was with her in hospital with an a terminally a terminal illness so we can only guess what that is well a terminal illness so we can only guess what that is. Well, a six months diagnosis with terminal illness meaning she's going to die soon. That is what a terminal illness is unless she's cured. 5k was raised for this. I'm assuming that was money to help the family continue while the wife was in hospital because they don't have free NHS care. No but mother-in-law is suggesting that she hates this girl, has spent this money

all on herself whilst in hospital. Yeah so the mother-in-law clearly doesn't like her at all and has a real issue. But the mad thing is, she said like she's not gonna help with the SUV, fine, but her son still needs that truck. Yeah, for work. And she's still declining. Then that's it, there's nothing to do, baby. If she won't do it, she won't do it. Maybe this girl does ask her parents to co-sign.

There's nothing they can do. The mum won't sign. The mum won't sign, babe. It's just silly that she's been so, it's a bit petty, isn't it? It's sad, really. It's sad, really, because they are grandchildren, but she doesn't even like her grandchildren.

I'm assuming that is because of the mum. But I just feel like these mum-in- are just going to be missing out on so much from their grandchildren and they're just like carrying on generational hate, isn't it? I mean the whole rich parents thing. Yeah it has nothing to do with it, but you know, then they're going to get to a point and they're not going to ask. She said her parents are retired, living in a two bedroom condo. What's a condo? It's like a caravan thing, isn't it?

No, a condo would be like a two bed house. Yeah, I don't think they're rich, but I think in the mum in-law's eyes, they're rich. The whole thing is pathetic. The whole thing is pathetic. What's the top comment saying? It is pathetic isn't it? Top comment says, oh time to get one vehicle and move away, you deserve better than her in your life. OP replies says, I'm literally looking at a different city right now, I would rather be with my rich parents far away from that lady." And then they reply saying, pretty sad, her need to hate is greater than her love for her son. And then OP replies again saying, yep, 100%. And she loves and respects her grandchildren so much, but doesn't respect their mother like get real lady. This is what I'm saying like so now now her son and daughter-in-law

are gonna move far away and she's not gonna be part of their lives and then that's a whole new thing she can complain about and hate her for when actually she won't see that she's created this because they were there but you have made out like she's an evil, like your daughter-in-law's an evil person, and you're ruining it all. It's sad, really. It is sad.

Every time I have a coke, I'm like... Nuts, nuts, nuts, nuts. Yeah, it's sad. It's gone off again. Yeah, it's a bit, it's all right. Right, post-traumatic. It's gone off again. Yeah, but it's alright. Right. Post-traumatic. Post-traumatic mother-in-law disorder.

Okay. Anyone else had post-traumatic mother-in-law disorder? I quite liked it. Every time someone mentions my mother-in-law or I see something that reminds me of her, I get visual reaction like my chest tightens and I feel on the verge of an anxiety attack. Even watching a show or movie that talks about the importance of mothers sets me off because that's literally her whole guilt tripping my husband for defending me by playing the but I'm your mother and mothers should always come first card on repeat. For context my husband my mother-in-law has spent my entire marriage disrespecting me let me read

that again mother-in-law has spent my entire marriage disrespecting me, making cruel comments about my weight and my struggle to conceive, acting jealous of my relationship with my husband and vocalizing it, and even lying about having cancer for sympathy. When we finally went no contact, she escalated by spreading lies about us,

making false abuse allegations against my husband and even turning my extended family against him to the point where his life was threatened. We've been completely no contact for months now but I feel like I have PTSD from the whole experience even though she's she's out of our lives it's like my body still reacts as if she's right there anybody else relate how do you actually move past this when the damage is already done I mean that sounds about right really and that's a sort of reaction you have to any sort of trauma. It doesn't matter who has caused that trauma. I think it's the unpredictability of not knowing what's going to come next. Yeah because that's the behaviour

you don't expect from somebody who should love you. Meant to love you yeah. I do like, I mean for me, for so many years I was happy to keep talking to Paul's mum and dad anytime that they stopped talking, but now after the last incident, never again. So it's not just for me, for him as well, do you know what I mean? I feel like sometimes enough is enough But this is on another a whole nother level where she's Basically, can you get a son hurt? What kind of her she's all right with it? Yeah, but I hope that they went to the police and yeah I hope so too because people shouldn't really get away with that. Mm-hmm. Do you know what I mean?

It doesn't specifically say, but the top comment does say, mine is deceased now, but I've been following this subreddit so I can communicate with you all and I still feel that reaction too. Meaning so she's just saying, yeah, she understands. I'm gonna go to the second comment my mother-in-law my mother-in-law compared to many compare I

can compare to many of these stories and even though we're on the road to redemption my husband when my husband mentions her the body doesn't forget the nonsense that she has put us through I'm afraid in my situation I just take a minute before I respond because it's just me Reacting and not actually her being a problem for once so that's long lasting effects. Yeah, I Mean, of course it does because I can relate to it. It's an abusive relationship at the end of the day isn't it? Yeah, that's what I mean. It doesn't matter who the actual person is. It's someone who should have had your backs. It's someone, even if you didn't get on with their partner,

you'd still expect them to turn up for you know. Yeah. Oh but I do I can understand that I can understand that with a parent with a parent-in-law with any of it because these people are meant to love care and be in your life you're meant to form and bond in your relationship and then you've got someone that's crazy just is like it's mental really isn't it? Yeah she sounds like one of those like, yeah, would allow something really bad to happen and be like, ha, deserve it, ha, deserve it. Or, something bad happens, she goes, what about me?

Like one of those, do you know what I mean? What about me, what about you? I don't really understand, I just, if nothing else comes of everything that's happened like in your life and mine I really hope that when my children marry whether that's women men whatever I don't really care that my daughters or son-in-law whatever it may be don't hate me yeah that's it just like you know I don't need to be the favorite I need to be the favorite but I don't need to be

the favorite but I just don't need to be the favorite. But I just don't want them to be like, oh the gods, we're going around your mom's like, I don't want that. And I hope that as friends you'll all keep me in check. Yeah, I think that I think that any daughter-in-law's got more to worry about with you lot than anything else. What? Well, can you imagine if they do something to one of the boys? What? Well can you imagine if they do something to one of the boys? To be fair Alfie's first girlfriend I loved, I actually was wonderful, Sri Lanka was she from Sri Lanka? Yeah. And her mum and dad were not happy that Alfie was white so that kind of ended because Alfie was like a nobody secret which I think is great I think I raised

them to be who they are and that's great but but I was guided I mean she would have been perfect I loved her to bits I love you but you know it is what it is I don't think there'd be many for Alfie I think Harry will have any girlfriends and I think that your two your eldest will settle down with a really, you know, with the one. And then the youngest will be, got this one this week, look who I found. Although, I don't know, obviously Valentine's coming up and he was like, he's got quite a lot of girlfriends at school yeah and he's like this stony toes asked Bella to be their valentine I'm like oh how do you feel about that because him and Bella like from like day dot being we're talking about number two aren't we? Baby number two yeah and he's like I don't know I'm like

are you gonna ask? He's like no no I ain't gonna ask her I ain't gonna ask her I said like, are you gonna ask her? She's like, no, no. Oh my god. I ain't gonna ask her. I ain't gonna ask her, I ain't gonna ask her. I said, well, who are you gonna ask? I ain't asking nobody, I ain't asking nobody. Did you ask anybody in school? What, to be my valentine? Yeah, I didn't. No, it's just cringey, isn't it?

Yeah, but was it cringey when we were young? Yeah. Was it? Yeah, yeah, I mean, I don't, I don't think I was really fancied either, to be honest. I don't, I don't think I was really fancied either, to be honest. I don't remember you boys being like, oh Ellie, Ellie, ma. I get a bit more now, but I wear a lot of makeup for that.

Do you know what I mean? But at school, I don't feel like anyone was like, Ellie, ma. When at Devon, let's move on now. He was my Valentine. I'm gonna move on real on now. He was my Valentine. I'm going to move on real swiftly now. My fiance wants me to just move on from everything his mum did during wedding planning, but I'm struggling.

I was going to say to you, which one shall I read? And you've just made that easy. Not this one. No, but yeah, I've literally, I've read that one. It's great. No but yeah I've literally I've read that one it's great. Yeah for content my mother-in-law has been a nightmare when it comes to my wedding she's thrown tantrums, tied tried to take me up, tied, tried to take control of decisions that weren't hers to make and made the entire planning process way more stressful than it needed to be. Do you want to say? She's putting her finger in my hole. Get in the chair. It was quite a good noise. I'm sure he gets it. Where did I get to? I don't know but we need to grow up. She acts like it was her wedding not mine

and when she didn't get her way she would guilt trip, manipulate or even get outright nasty about it. Between all the drama, the tantrums, her constant need to control everything. Oh my god watch one with my face. Her constant need to control everything. We lost so much time in the planning process. Now I only have four months left and I'm still scrambling to hire a photographer, a videographer and a florist. I feel so behind and the stress is overwhelming. It's only been about a month since she finally backed off and now my fiance is acting like I should just move on and pretend none of it happened. She wants me to go to visit her, hang out like nothing's wrong

and just let it go. The thing is I can't just erase everything overnight. She put me through so much and I don't feel like I should have to force myself to be okay with someone who disrespected me so much. Now my fiance and I are having issues because of this. He just wants peace but I feel like the peace is only possible if I ignore everything that happened and sweep my feelings under the rug. Am I wrong for not being able to just get over it like he wants me to. I don't think she's wrong but because it sounds right so that it's to me when I read it I feel like they had a great relationship and then when it came to wedding planning the mum-in-law lost

their heads and became a bit of a mother-in-lawzilla right and then she was told get back in your box mate because it we're not doing it your way This is this is the concept that I got from it So that including from the from her son and the daughter-in-law were like no She feels like she's lost time and then they're picking it back up. I feel like in this circumstance The month if it was me, I'd say listen that, because I can't move on unless we talk. I'd be like, listen, that got me down. Let's never do that again.

If you feel like something and I tell you no, that's got to be where it ends, especially if we're going to have children in the future. But I feel like the mother-in-law in this case deserves second chance. Yeah, I feel like, I'm literally not said that about any other story. Say how you feel, you know, there's no real love lost here. No. It's just maybe for excitement, maybe through... Maybe she's only got sons.

Yeah, maybe not even realizing she's just got out of control herself. Right. And then has a, you know, in her head she's just got out of control herself and then has a, you know, in her head she's like, I'm just trying to help. Yeah. And no one's actually setting her right. Yeah. But thank you for your help, but this is really what we want. Yeah, yeah. It's giving carried away to me. That's where my mind went. Yeah. What does Reddit think? Burn her! Burn her with fire! Yeah, a little bit. He's showing you what the rest of your life is going to look like because your mother-in-law isn't going to be like this over the wedding planning and then never again. She's going to be like

this when it comes to family holidays or if you guys have kids and his response will be the same. He'll expect you to rug sweep your mother-in-law's controlling toxic behaviour for the sake of peace which means that your boundaries will be stomped and your feelings will be hurt and ignored. You need to sort this out with him ASAP. He needs to have your back before you get married." Read what she, I can see that she's written back. Yeah, so go straight into what she said. This is exactly what I'm afraid of and I've brought up all these concerns to him. We ended up in a huge fight and his response was, she's old you need to just move on and get over it. She's apologised. Why can't you just be okay with things? First of all 55 is not old. That's not an excuse for her behaviour.

Honestly I think she's incredibly manipulative and calculating. She knows exactly what she's doing. We've repeatedly asked her to stop interfering with the wedding yet she keeps pushing. She's crying and screaming in public and at this point I generally think my fiance is afraid of her. I never expected to be in this situation and it's honestly horrible. I don't know what to do that sort of flipped a little bit a little bit but at the same time when she done the original story she said she stopped now apologize like it's done like that is the concept that she is me forward and even there she's you know she said

she's going into what's happened I still land on that give her another chance I hope it's not the rest of her life but sometimes I don't know is it this is a difficult one but is this a case of she's lost herself out of the excitement maybe OP needs to actually grow a little bit of a backbone I hate using that. Yeah and go Okay, but I will tell her how I feel. Yeah, and then we will move on she will not come at me for it I think that's fair. I think we will move on Yeah, cuz you even with Paul's family every time something happens. Sometimes that's really tiring that you have to explain to someone how they

But are acting. For me it's very important that if you've pissed me off, whether I'm right or wrong that you pissed me off, you pissed me off, I need to tell you whether we agree to disagree. But husband also needs to grab it with back pain and support her. Right, but you know that's what I'm saying, it's very hard to look in on a relationship where she has stated, this happened, it's never happened before, is it, and will it happen again? Who can answer that? Generally, if you've got that kind of mummy law,

you've got that kind of mummy law, you just have to decide. But let me tell you, there are more mummy laws like this than there are any other mummy laws. It's very rare you get the gold dust. I think there's an element with Mummy Law's, the son's mom, that she's losing her child. I mean yeah I get that, we are both mothers to boys babe and I get that, do you know what I mean? I understand that but at the same time,

I think she's gone crazy, she hasn't got her own way, it's backfired, the son, the daughter-in-law have been like, no, and then that's it, they're like, why'd you fucking neck it? I don't know whether the son has been, that's what I mean. I can't go straight with that. From the information I've got, I gonna say sit down have a chat and then you'll know whether you can move on or not and then that you've set the bar by doing

that you've said that you've set the bar to say if you do it again or anything get I am definitely gonna confront you because that is how I yeah do you know what I mean deal with the situation. I don't like that husband has been like she's old, no yeah yeah but you know like I mean not sticking up for him but definitely a man thing is they just want an easy life babe. You know like for me with Paul's way anytime anything happened I'd have to talk about it and he'd be like well these people are saying get out like these people yeah no they are get out it's because of it's's because if you read the Reddit thread, this bit, the never-ending story.

You need to ask yourself if this relationship is worth dealing with her for the next 20 to 30 years. That's what I'm saying. And even if your answer is yes, you need to do couples counseling, ASAP, to help you both navigate the issues between the big one that isn't going away because yeah 55 isn't old it's not even if it was age

isn't an excuse for shitty behavior mate like I feel like all these people responding I'm like there's nothing to say she wouldn't find someone else with exactly the same issues because they are more common than not. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Which is a weird thing. Are you ready to move on? Yeah.

Right, so this did get a bit confusing to me but hopefully it will make more sense the second time I read it. But it was so good in places I was like I have to read it. Mother-in-law from hell she did witchcraft on me. Did you save it? Yes. Go on. I honestly feel like I'm losing my mind and I don't know what to do. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year and things went well.

When I met his parents at first his mother is obsessed with reiki and spirituality and at first I didn't make much of it. One day I came over the house and I kept getting uncomfortable feeling when I went to give her a hug, sort of like something was holding me back and telling me not to do it. I began having really weird dreams of her smiling in creepy ways. I would wake up at 3am in the morning with my heart racing. I told my boyfriend this and it turned into a huge fight. Given that she is into spirituality, the first thing I thought of was this could be witchcraft. I went to a psychic medium and my suspicions was correct. I almost broke up with my boyfriend at this time, but I tried to put it aside our differences for the sake of our relationship.

Throughout the relationship, she has made comments to me that really sent me over the edge. One time I walked into the house and she stated that she felt like I had bad energy to me and then she told me to wait outside the house for an hour while she saged and then I could come back in. Last time I checked I wasn't a dog so I took my happy self to the car and left that place Of course, my boyfriend didn't say anything another time she was mentioning to me how her husband's mother couldn't stand her and how she was Content

content Conflict constant conflict between them both. I content conflict, constant conflict between them both. I... Hold on, just lost myself. I started how, I stated how I was so sorry that she had to go through so much difficulty during this period of time and her son burst out laughing.

I asked what was so funny and she goes, it's like the only thing you know how to say. You're constantly apologizing. I feel like whenever my boyfriend and I are alone somehow she's in the room with us it's weird. I can't really explain it. I'm not sure if my parents didn't love me properly but the relationship between those two seem almost like they're flirting. It's creepy, it's creeping me out. I am senior therapist about this because a part of me thinks I could be suffering from some sort of mental illness at the same time. I had an ex-boyfriend in the past who I had been having constant dreams of him having

another family. I got a bad feeling in my chest similar to the one that I feel about my current boyfriend's mother and hired a private investigator to my surprise. I was right. My dream shows him with two little girls and the private investigator discovered the Facebook under a different name with two little girls and his cover photo of him kissing his wife. My friend's joke about me having the gift so a part of me thinks I could be right or could I be insane. I hate it.

Get out. Really? Always listen to your gut. Yeah. I can't stress it enough. Nobody listens to their gut. No. But every time the inevitable happens, you go,

I knew that, my gut's there, my, follow your instincts, girl. Get the fuck out. Yeah. Get out. there is something very weird and creepy and wrong. I don't think it's the witchcraft, she can't really slag off witchcraft and then go and see a psychic medium, that was weird.

I don't think she was slagging it off, I think she was like, she's done some weird voodoo shit on her. Yeah, yeah, yeah, And she might well have done. But I agree in the sense that this relationship is not going to work. I definitely believe her when she's like, I see it in my dreams because we all know I have the same thing. It's not that I see it, it's like I know, it's very hard to explain but I understand what she means.

Top comment. Save yourself. And that's from Emily, yeah. explain but I understand what she means top comment I'm not sure yourself and that's from Emily yeah I'm not trying to talk mess on that stuff but it sounds like she has chased such deep anxiety in your relationship that you are having religious delusions speak to a licensed therapy instead of someone claiming that they're a psychic. I love everybody that's like, therapy! It doesn't sound like a hex, like she has hexed you. It sounds like you are having stress induced nightmares that are showing you all of the thoughts you have about your mother-in-law.

Strange together and in a terrifying way. She hasn't cast anything to constantly be in the room. She has wormed her way into your head with her comments and they persist to follow you around. I'm trying to see if the OP has said it. Someone said this only because the OP responded someone went you're both crazy the OP went I feel you. I don't think she's crazy. No. But I don't think this is healthy. She doesn't respond to anyone else at all. Somebody said you have gut feelings and your instincts for a reason. They say, right, so they, I read something

that's like you're not supposed to cut your hair because your hair is your natural way of telling you what is good and what is bad. And the primal part of the brain so when you meet someone it's your primal brain that tells you within eight seconds whether someone's a good or a bad person because the primal brain is survival first right more than anything so when you meet someone and you get that bad yeah that is your primal brain telling you this person is danger. We know this one. Run the fuck away.

Which is fascinating that this girl is having this about her mother-in-law and I think. And everyone's like, you're crazy. I don't think she's crazy. She's not. I don't think she's crazy. I don't think that the mum-in-law has put a hex on her, but I also do believe in stuff like that, so I'm not gonna say not definitely I think cleanse your aura give yourself a get some sage clay cleanse your area and stay the fuck away from the lot of them and she's

stated that the the son and the mum it feels like they're in a relationship you ever watch that film from fucking I was so young have you ever watched charmed? no charmed no I don't think what? what's charmed? the fuck the three witches it doesn't matter what ends they got Simon brook in it no anyway so in charm there is an actor his name is leo in the film in the thingy, he did a film years ago where the mother and son were like a different species and they'd get, he'd get the girls and then they'd both suck the soul out of it.

That's what it's giving. Charmed is the three, Phoebe, Piper, Paige, no, Prudence. No, I can't believe you would have to borrow the box set. I mean you have not lived. It is fucking awesome. Anyway, yeah, so I believe in stuff like that.

I think she should do what you said. Stick with whatever's going on. Mine's telling us something for a reason, right? Yeah. That sixth sense is... Yeah, we have that and for whatever reason as adults we seem to really ignore it. Ignore it. And push it down deep as if like, as if it's just a funny feeling and actually it really isn't. It's like

you're trying to convince yourself all the time that you're not going mad. It's like touching something, seeing something, tasting someone, smelling someone. It is exactly one of those feelings. It is. It's like, it's a sinking feeling. It's so real. You need to trust it. It's funny because it often happens, people are like, oh my god, you're going to love them. And I'm like, nope. Like straight away, the minute I'm eating, nope, that's away, the minute I meet him, nope. That's a no from me. And I know and then that's it.

Like I'm like, no, there's something wrong with that person. Sure people have it about us. Love it. What? Yeah. That's rude. What, me and you? Who, us?

No. Yes. No. 100%. Right, take us home. All right, I've got, I'm, I'm, you're like, I'm between that one or that one. Give me the titles and I'll choose. All right, so, my mother-in-law lost her mind at me. Right.

Mother-in-law babysitting. Right. mother-in-law babysitting right and mother-in-law thinks she's my mum I want the babysitting and I'm close to cutting my mother-in-law out of my life with a knife because I see the title and I didn't read it okay because I see the title and I didn't read it. Okay. And let me just zoom in there. A little zoom-y zoom. We can't see it.

A little zoom-y zoom. A little zoom. Right. Reverend Law, babysitting. I'm currently 33 weeks pregnant and I can't help but I always think what will happen when I return to work and have to leave my baby girl with either of her grandmothers. Been there.

Either of her grandmothers. Been there. I trust my mum with my whole heart. She was maternity nurse who specialised in infant care. She gives me great advice and has always looked after every child in our family. On the other hand, my mother-in-law has only raised her two children.

Baby sat an older toddler niece probably five times and unfortunately doesn't give me the best advice during my pregnancy, like lay on my back on the couch, feet on the wall and head touching the floor to relieve nausea like girl what! Anyway sometimes she'll talk about the future when she'll babysit and how I'll come pick up my daughter and her head will be shaved because it will grow her hair better. I know what she's talking about it's a culture thing. I've discussed with her several times in not doing that she's also mentioned her disagreements with safe sleeping and how nothing happens.

I'm very committed to safe sleeping or convincing my husband not to change any diaper because he's a man. Huh? Okay. I feel like this mum's outdated and I can't cope with her already. She's a bit crazy, yeah. Just yesterday my husband's brother came down from Colorado. Colorado? He took Callie with his small family and my

mother-in-law was so eager to take care of the nine month old the baby was fussed and she gave her an entire grape to chew on. Oh. Her mum and I quickly got up because it's a choking hazard but she didn't seem to understand, was very stubborn and salty about the situation because her kids turned out fine. She even mentioned she would give her babies shrimp. I've told my husband about my anxiety. He agrees and will try to talk to his mother when the time is near. But I feel like this woman is so stubborn. I'm scared that she'll do something dangerous to my baby to prove to me that nothing will happen. and I'm an overreacting first time mum. I'm really struggling with how to approach my mother-in-law. I feel like I'm being pushed to that point. I don't want

to keep asking my husband or my mum for help to talk to her but it feels like she's just waiting for me to react in a way that proves I'm overreacting, like she wants to see me upset for our own satisfaction. Her stubbornness is really overwhelming. I just don't know how to get through to her. Why does she have to be so resistant to what I'm saying? I just want her to respect my boundaries and the choices I'm making for my baby. So yeah I can't really see myself leaving her my baby like she would like. It's hard because I want my child to have that connection with both grandmas. Do I have literally yell or cuss? Do I have to literally yell and cuss? I've

never been the person to be disrespectful. I think that no matter how the mother-in-law, mum, you know, grandmother, I think it is not their take to disrespect and go against what the mother wants. If she wants something a certain way then that is how exactly how it should be done. It doesn't matter how she grew up. And if you're not right and if you're not happy with that as the mummy law or say grandmother Then you don't have to babysit There will be way to you won't exactly I mean I get that the anxiety because I had massive anxiety leaving the boys with anybody I understand the anxiety and your parent in your way and there's nothing wrong with that

I definitely asked both, you know mothers for advice on certain occasions but I definitely parented the way I wanted to parent and my rules were my rules not that they were really left with them but you get my point my rules were my my rules like this is how I do it can you please try and stick to the schedule and how I like to do it and I think that if someone can't respect that then make that's the first and last time you'll have the privilege I mean what would you know shave a fucking hair off and then send her home what laugh laugh in the month's face I told you it grow back but

it doesn't I mean that listen I shaved both the bothums face. I told you it would grow back better. Listen, I shaved both the boys, whether I had girls boys or I'd shave, but that's a personal preference as a mother to do what you want to do with your child. Nobody has the right to do whatever they want with your child, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. I think it's quite a sad situation because their anxiety is only going to get worse. I'm glad the husband supported though. Yeah, yeah. Needs to be, isn't it? It needs to be. It's not easy being a first time mum.

It really isn't. No. Comes with a lot of anxiety. Yeah, and a lot of people want to give their points of view and their advice and how they did it and how like their kids were brought up fine. I think we need to think about that this anxiety can quickly swap to post-traumatic, what is the thing I'm looking for, you know where they get their sickness. It's postpartum depression so you know let's not stress new mums out for God's sake.

Yeah, there's no need. What does the comment say? She doesn't sound like a safe babysitting option. After the great incident, there would be no way in hell my baby would be alone with her. Threatening to do things to my child I've said no to as a parent, especially pertaining to her safety, is a deal breaker. My parents have done less and are constantly supervised during visits at my home. I don't visit them with my children. Firstly, breastfeed if you can, that way there will be. No pushing for overnight. You can dance around politely. Every time

she suggests she can look after your child but really there's no way to get around hard feelings when it comes to ensuring the safety of your child. Things will come to a head eventually tell your tell your SO there is no way she's babysitting and she can either deal with it or you will and the truth won't get in the way of hurting feelings or entitlement. I mean the grape thing I still cut up grapes. It scared me seeing this whole grape thing when I was a new mum. I still cut up grapes and I'm talking 18 and 16, I still cut them. I mean I don't cut them with Cassian anymore and that's because he doesn't put the whole thing in his mouth, he nibbles them. No, I cut it in half.

It doesn't worry me, like long ways. Yeah. I used to always do it long ways. Yeah. But it doesn't worry me so much anymore. Like I just, I'm like a lunatic in my head all the time. I think the worst all the time. It's exhausting.

Yeah. I mean, I do resonate with this one a little bit. Tell her why. the time. It's exhausting. Yeah. I mean I do resonate with this one a little bit. Just because obviously generations are different and stuff aren't they? So I remember. I just think it's a respect thing, do you know what I mean? And I hope that when we're grandmothers we're respectful of their feelings because my way wasn't necessarily the right way. No. It was just how I did it, and I'm gonna have to respect. Yeah. I mean, the boy's dad's mum

put alcohol on her finger and put it in my eldest mouth, and I was like, yeah, don't do that again. On the gums. And she sort of laughed at me, and she did it again. Like, there was a second time, and I had to tell him. I rubbed it. I rubbed it on my boy on my boys gums I was alright with that one. Yeah I wasn't alright with the fact that she smoked cigarettes and her fingers were yellow and that she has put them in my child's mouth with alcohol and and nicotine.

Yeah I get it. But equally don't put your don't put your hands in my child's mouth yeah yeah i get i get that as well like i'm not i will speak on the don't kiss my child on the mouth especially if you've got herpes what was the other thing she did i don't know she told me that i smothered him too much oh i got all that as well I don't know, she told me that I smothered him too much. Oh, I got all that as well. I'm creating a rod for my own back. At that point, she was quite poorly, and actually all I was trying to do was

stop her body hurting from him crying. Yeah, yeah. You know, I was actually trying to be good. Yeah, yeah. Otherwise I would cry. Massively. Yeah, massively. You know, I got told that I moddy coddled, I was alright with that I was like yeah I definitely do

100% so I didn't feel like I did I just felt like I was trying to save pain the pain that I get when he cried went through my bones going through her fragile body like it affected me when mine cried I was like we her fragile body. It affected me when mine cried. I was like, we cry for like relax. Right, that's it. Right. Right, thank you for joining everyone. Until next time, like, follow and

subscribe. That's it babe. And don't be entitled. Yeah, like relax. Oh my legs, my legs legs my legs. Every time. Do better.