Midnight Burger - Chapter 52: Old Friends
Episode Date: May 12, 2026"And then there's you..."Cast:Ava - Finlay StevensonMarguerite - Lauren LeblancEx - Camille SmickerCaspar - Joe FisherLeif - Tom MoormanPhilomena - Amber DekkersEffie - Julie Cowden-StarbirdZ...ebulon - Neal StarbirdDavid - Quintin Jones, Jr.Kazi - Jessica Morris Written by Joe FisherDirected and Produced by Joe Fisher and Finlay StevensonEpisode art by WhisperdanMusic:Torna a Surriento (The Return to Sorrento) - G. Paghara; Ernesto de Curtis, Pref. by Giovanni MartinelliPirate Song by Reinald Werrenrath; Robert Louis Stevenson; Henry F. GilbertFrom the Land of the Sky-Blue Water by Fritz Kreisler; Cadman; Kreisler; Carl LamsonSubscribe for early access, ad free episodes, additional content and more!Subscribe on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/midnightburgerSubscribe on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/midnight-burger/id1537653218How about some merch? https://www.midnightburgermerch.comRead and search Scripts with PodScripts: https://podscripts.app/Explore the Midnight Burger Wiki: https://wiki.weopenatsix.com/wiki/Main_PageFor more information on our show, visit our website: https://www.weopenatsix.comFind and support our sponsors at: fableandfolly.com/partnersSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Previously on Midnight Burger, there's a guy named Casper and he's got a lot of friends.
Hey, Phil, I didn't mean to come here.
I know it's very strange, but to get out of your life, I'm going to need your help.
Yes, that's right, folks. Casper is somewhere out there in the
multiverse, doing what he does best, which is, of course, get people much smarter than he is to
get him out of the jam he put himself in. I need your help.
Help with what?
I need you to help me make a motorboat. He's trying to get back to Cryptesia, where David is.
I brought you balloons. Also, Effie the robot and Zebulon the ship.
Also that weird lady who put that thing in his brain that one time.
Hello, Casper.
Take this fucking thing out of my head.
No.
Kazi, take this fucking thing out of my head.
No.
Meanwhile, Croc's got a gun.
What do you call it?
I'm sure, as a responsible gun owner,
Kroc only has this gun for self-defense.
I'm in the diner.
Eeps, now let's remember the rule of guns
is that if you put a gun on stage in the first act,
you can't fire it until at...
Eaps.
Let's start the shift.
I'm going to go ahead and put this in the cat.
of bad. Do you feel comfortable with that?
Okay, let's game this out.
We have a big gun.
It's being proposed that this big gun can destroy the diner, right?
Let's consider for a moment all the things the diner has been through and not been destroyed.
A black hole one time, etc.
What then could be made that would destroy it?
destroy it. That's the question, right? It can't be a question of high-level energy because
what has more energy than a black hole? Also, if it did have more energy than a black hole,
it would rip apart basically everything as soon as it was fired, right? So then it must be
something else. Some sort of Achilles heel. Yeah, I hear you, they could just be fooling themselves.
She says she's going to destroy the diner, but what the hell does she know?
I know. More data.
Hi. So, Jizinka, this big gun of yours.
How does it work?
New energy.
New energy.
Can you expand on that?
No.
Okay.
So what phase of the testing are you in?
Efficacy testing is complete.
It's complete.
You know how it works?
Correct.
The diner is destroyed?
No.
How do you know it works?
There have been several successful tests on targets in the testing field.
The testing field? What is that?
My father has collected a field of test targets.
Test.
The other constructs?
The ones scattered all around the castle?
For an ample period of time, my father has been collecting similar targets and arranging them in the testing field.
Oh.
It is important to continue maintenance testing. I will test now.
That's okay.
Just think, don't do this on my account. It's really fine.
It is important to continue maintenance testing.
I really take your word for it.
Here is our current target.
Fox.
It is the most recent acquisition.
Testing will identify deviations.
Maybe skip it, though.
Please secure yourself for energy release.
Energy release?
Destroyed.
It's gone.
You destroyed it.
As I said, the testing phase for the weapon has ended.
What phase are you in now?
Targeting.
The constructs in the targeting field do not.
require acquisition in a targeting matrix.
In order to destroy an extrasolar target, there will need to be complex targeting schemes.
So how far along are you in testing the targeting?
Testing is nearly complete. All that is required now is a target within range.
What's your range?
As soon as Midnight Burger is detected in the Cryptesia system, I will target the weapon and fire.
Fucking great.
Any ideas, Carl?
This is how you do it.
Agreed.
We've been flying wrong our whole lives.
Incorrectly.
We were supposed to be flying privately this whole time.
We were.
Instead, we were flying publicly.
I didn't realize how terrible it was until now.
These seats are leather
I may not be able to leave this plane
Why would we leave? It's nicer than my house
Can we get her to take the long way to wherever we're going?
Where are we going? No idea
Do we want to know? No idea
Good morning
Hello
Can I get you anything to drink? To drink
Hmm
How deep are we going into the lap of luxury here? Two mimosas, please. All right then
No problem. Please look over these NDAs while you wait.
Okay. NDAs.
Guess it was just a matter of time.
Are we going to be asked to make weapons of mass destruction?
It's possible.
Okay. Do you know how to make a weapon of mass destruction?
Because I have no idea.
Why would I know?
You're a physicist.
Uh, we're both physicists.
Right, but my physics is the stargazy physics,
and your physics is closer to the making things blow up physics.
I guess I can figure it out.
Great.
And we're okay with that, morally?
As long as we get to stay on the plane.
So that was one of them, right?
What?
Herf, she's one of the Android things.
There's two of them, right?
That was one of them?
I think so.
Wow.
It's not as impressive as the leather seats, but it's nice work.
Hey there.
Well, well, well.
Mr. Motorboat.
Everything all right?
You guys are comfortable?
So comfortable.
I realize this is a rather unusual situation.
We don't know what you mean.
An Android just took our drink order and we're looking over these NDAs while we're being flown to an undisclosed location.
And I'm like, God, again.
Just another Tuesday.
Sure.
I promise all will be explained to you.
We can't wait for that explanation.
We can't.
Hey, Casper.
Did you know I can get the internet on my phone?
I've heard about that.
I hear it's very popular.
When the most powerful woman on the planet tells you to get on a plane, you just kind of do it.
It's obligatory.
But then there's you.
Right.
And I was like, who's this guy?
I get that a lot.
The ex-husband of the most powerful woman on the planet.
That's me.
Who walked into my office asking for a motorboat.
Hmm, phrasing.
Look, I realize that an android just took your drink order, and yet I'm really the odd one out on this plane.
Because you teach middle school history and everyone else.
on this plane can crush walnuts with their intellect?
Something like that.
Okay, two mimosa's.
Fantastic.
We didn't read these NDAs, but we signed them anyway.
Great.
We're totally fine with whatever death ray laser you guys are building.
That's great to know.
Let me know if you need anything else.
We will.
Everything is so great, by the way.
You're doing such a great job.
Thank you.
How's your day going?
You having a good day?
I am.
Thank you for asking.
Of course.
Could I get something to drink?
Ma'am?
Robot ma'am?
Could I have a beverage?
You know what?
I'll be right back.
Seriously?
What?
You're hitting on the Android?
I'm not hitting on the android.
How's your day going?
Are you having a good day?
That's not hitting on someone.
So really something just needs to be shaped like a woman.
Do you hit on the hula girls that truckers keep on their dashboard, too?
Oh, those are pretty hot.
Cheers, dummy.
Cheers, dummy.
Hey, what's up?
This is stupid.
Why am I doing this?
Why don't we just tell them everything?
Well, we can't dump it all on them at once.
We need to slowly introduce all of the completely ridiculous aspects of the story one at a time.
Human beings are so slow.
Don't complain to me about slowness.
Right before this, you were literally watching trees grow.
Fine.
We've got the NDA signed, which Philomena was really worried about.
Now, I'm going to go talk to her, and we will get to the nitty-gritty of the situation, okay?
Fine.
Fine.
I would just like to say you're a super-powerful android who can see through time and space,
and you could totally tell us exactly what's going to happen and all of the right things to do,
but you're just not doing that, and I haven't complained about that at all.
Spoilers.
Casper.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
Yes.
I've seen the numbers, and they don't make any sense.
We're going to have to start the process over from the beginning.
We calibrate the units and go back to square one.
I don't know how to solve this problem right now, and I don't have time.
Set everything back to zero and wait for my go-ahead.
Hi.
Hi.
What's going on?
Important things?
Yes.
Things I wouldn't understand, I'm assuming.
I'm trying to bring back two and three.
Two and three were zapped into a random place in the multiverse.
Their minds were backed up to the mainframe on campus.
I'm trying to load those minds.
into new simulacrums, but some things not working.
You can just reboot them into new bodies?
Theoretically, I can, but some things not working.
Would you like my two cents? Maybe I can solve the problem.
No, thank you. Are we ready to do this?
As ready as we're ever going to be.
You really think they're going to buy this?
It's a thoroughly unbelievable story, but we've got pretty compelling evidence.
And they're not going to just freak out and join a nunnery?
Uh, those two joining a nunnery is actually a more unbelievable story than the one we're about to tell them.
Fine. Let's go.
Okay.
Hello. I'm Filomena.
Hello.
You have a lovely plane.
Thank you.
Will we all get one of these when it's Utopia?
No.
Another strike for Utopia.
I've been asking around about you two.
Rut Row.
That's almost never followed by something good.
Did they talk about how good we?
are at parties. Or would be if we ever went to them.
If you talk to Professor Alyssa Keithley at Caltech, I don't know how the lab mice got out
and she can't prove anything.
I actually suffer from delayed onset childhood. You can look it up. I actually age backward,
Benjamin Button style, but only mentally. Professor Maddox, you are working on something
so secretive that you write in an antiquated form of Dutch shorthand. And,
Professor Sagnié, you are rumored to have a stack of notes on your kitchen table that you've never shown to anyone.
Both of these projects are apparently revolutionary and would change the face of physics.
Is that why you write in that shorthand?
What's with the notes on your kitchen table?
You first.
You first.
Wait, how do you know this?
I know this because Casper told me.
Hi there.
Mr. Motorboat?
I really need that to not be my nickname.
Is he your private investigator or something?
He's not. I've been waiting until we were in the air to tell you this because I need you two to be a captive audience for a while.
Now I'm uncomfortable. I am too. It's a new feeling.
Ladies, here are a couple of tablets. There's going to be some data you're going to need to look at.
Okay. Sure.
I'm going to make a phone call. Okay.
Sure.
Several calls in the past week. Maybe it really is the end times like.
they're saying on all the wrong news channels.
Hi there.
How's it going?
I'll be there.
You'll be there.
David's Gallery thing.
I'll be there.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
It's on my calendar.
I'll be there.
Okay.
That's great.
Okay.
What do I do?
Do I bring a gift to an art opening?
I think you just wear a turtleneck and go for it.
Okay, then.
I'll see you there.
I think this is really great, Phil.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think so.
Okay, I'll see you then.
I'll see you then.
But he's right there.
Yes.
So who were you talking to?
Him.
I, uh...
I need the two of you to use those very big brains of yours to zoom all the way out.
A few days ago, this Casper showed up on my campus.
I knew it wasn't my ex-husband, but I didn't know how it wasn't my ex-husband.
long story short, we performed a scan of him with a spectrometer.
That scan revealed that.
At the molecular level, his body reflects light at a slightly different frequency than anyone on board this plane or this planet.
What does that mean, Dr. Sagniere?
What that would mean that he's from a different universe?
That data is on your tablets now.
I'm from a different universe than yours.
The motorboat I need you to build me
is the vessel that's going to get me back
to where I need to go without killing me.
Is this data right? It's right.
Look, you're both very smart people,
and I'm sure you're both thinking of all the ways
that this can't be true.
So, X is going to speed things along for us, okay?
Don't freak out.
How is she going to speed things along?
I don't know.
What is she going to speed things along?
going to do? I don't know.
Oh, Mama.
What?
She's gone.
I know.
Where did she go?
I don't know.
Back now!
Shit!
Here you go, Marguerite.
What?
This...
A teddy bear?
Do you want to tell Ava what that is?
This can't...
You...
wrote his name on the...
tag, remember? I...
This... this is August?
Your mom accidentally gave him to goodwill, right?
You...
You found my teddy bear?
From when I was a child?
No, Marguerite. I didn't.
I went to a universe where you never lost it,
and it was sitting in a box in the attic.
I...
Think.
We would like more mimosas, please.
One second.
Eva, the research that Marguerite has on her kitchen table is research that confirms the big bounce theory.
It confirms it?
In another universe, she shows this research to you.
And when you combine her research with your research on a single point of null entropy in the universe,
you leave your job and you go and find it.
When you find it, that's when you meet me.
From the beginning.
Okay. Once upon a time, my son ran away from home.
You know what the problem is, Carl?
I'm not the save the day one.
I'm the one who gets some sort of weird idea
and then someone else does the save the day thing.
I'm a muse, Carl.
I inspire people.
But now, here we are, as soon as Jizinka figures out how to target that thing, and as soon as the diner gets back to Cryptesia, it's going to get blown to bits.
And we, that's you and I, Carl, we have to figure out a way to stop it.
There does not appear to be an off-switch, or a way to unvassed.
plug it from the wall. And a cannon as long as a football field does not seem susceptible to
me spilling coffee on it. What's the biggest flaw with any scientific endeavor, Carl?
I've told you this a million times. Us, humans, thinking people, our short-sightedness,
our prejudices, our hubris. Jazeenka is the weak link here.
Okay. Okay. Remember when I asked her why she was doing this? She said, it's what I do. And then I said, why? And then she said, I have answered your question. I met this guy at a conference one time named Danny Mars. Danny designed weapons. You see, Carl, if you get enough scientists in a room, it's in a room. It's in a
inevitable that there will be a few who have shoes that are a little too nice, drive cars that
are a little too fast, always buying drinks at the bar. Defense contractors. They're all over the place,
but I remember Danny because he was a loud one, and he was a talker, could not shut up about
what he did for a living, and he was completely oblivious to how much.
much he disgusted the other scientists who were all dedicating their lives to observing space
rocks and studying mere cats or whatever. Danny stood there holding court at the bar while he
described his crowning achievement. It's called a daisy cutter, apparently. It's a bomb. When you drop it,
It doesn't explode when it hits the ground.
It explodes right before it hits the ground.
It's designed to leave the ground under it untouched
while shredding all of the human beings standing on it.
Cutting down the daisies.
Danny had apparently designed the next generation daisy cutter
and talked at length about how much more efficiently
his bomb massacres people.
It was fascinating to listen to him talk
because he could have been talking about anything.
He could have been talking about a vegetable spiralizer,
but he was talking about this.
Late that night, one of the zoologists got a little drunk
and decided to lay into him and call him a murderer,
made a whole scene.
Danny just stood there
While he got torn into by this lady
And at the end of her diatribe against him
He simply shrugged his shoulders
And said, it's what I do
Maybe Danny just needed something else to do, Carl
Wish me luck
Oh, Jazeca
When you say this thing uses new energy
What do you mean by that?
The weapon is powered by harvesting quantum vacuum fluctuations.
You're...
You're harvesting vacuum fluctuations?
Yes.
Jesus fucking Christ.
Okay.
Um...
Anyway.
Hey.
Have you ever wondered what else this technology can do?
What else?
Yeah.
Jizinka.
An experience.
Expansion of applications?
Yes.
I was asked to create the weapon.
Right.
Jizinka, do you ever have ideas come to you?
In idle moments?
Maybe you had a weird dream or somebody says something and it sends you down a rabbit hole?
What is a rabbit hole?
It's a place where new information leads you.
You get curious and you find your mind going to a different place.
I am presented with problems and I orchestrate their solutions.
Right.
Want to mess around?
Please define mess around.
What if I presented you with a problem and you came up with a solution?
I am currently engaged.
Sure, with the big gun.
But what if the big gun was a dual purpose device?
You're proposing multiple applications.
What if your weapon could also be something else?
Please define the problem to solve.
Oh, I don't know.
The weapon can deliver energy.
Can it also deliver information?
Jizinka?
Please define the data set.
Oh, okay.
Gee, I don't know.
Let's start small.
How about a simple audio record?
I can solve this problem.
Oh, yeah?
Yes.
Great.
I have the organism.
The...
Carl?
I have the Carl.
Okay.
Carl, you're up.
Yes, dear.
Everything all right?
Yes.
Dear, I believe so.
All right.
You seem to be wandering a bit about the ship, dear.
Our things, dear.
Things?
Any pressing matters at the moment?
All continues apace.
We've just disembarked a batch of the infirmed
and are docked with the flagship, awaiting our next deployment.
Any funny business of foot out there?
Well, that's not the sort of thing I can check on from where I sit,
but I don't observe anything out of sorts at the moment.
Dear, I do believe I'm having a notion.
Really?
I believe so.
Been a while, dear.
It has.
My notions have a propensity to begin in my knees,
and as you know, dear, these knees are not my own.
They are not.
They are, in fact, knees of eyes.
made in some sort of foundry.
And yet, I am having a notion.
Perhaps these new legs of yours are not unlike the legs of a foal.
Awkward and stumbling at first,
but once given the chance can break into a run.
Indeed.
Where's David?
I'm unsure.
David.
May we have a word.
Hey, y'all. What's up?
David, what's the present state of your duties?
My duties. My duties are complete. I was about to go have some dinner.
What's going on? Effie?
David, come on down to the ship.
I'm having a notion.
A what?
A notion, David.
I don't know what that means.
David.
Effie has, throughout our lives, had a bit of a notion now and then about things.
You guys keep saying notion like it's going to suddenly become clear to me?
David, I am getting dangerously close to repeating myself.
Do I have to repeat myself?
Okay.
Geez, I'll be right there.
What's it to be, dear?
Put some coal in the engine, dear.
I believe we'll set out and follow my knees around for a bit.
I'll get the pistons firing, dear.
How do you think they're doing?
They seem to be doing fine.
How could they possibly be doing fine?
I'm not doing fine.
I can tell.
Ava gets this look in her eyes when she's suddenly not bored anymore.
Does she?
Yeah.
I don't want them stepping off this plane and making a call to the New York Times.
They signed the NDAs.
Yes, because nobody's broken.
an indiae before. I don't understand what you're worried about. I'm worried about my life's work,
Casper. I've been building Imelda and Scott for my entire life. If it gets derailed because of this plan,
I will be nonplussed to say the least. Oh, you'll be nonplussed. So you're running a goofy
errand for a minute. That's not going to suddenly get people to change their mind about utopia.
Yes, it will. What are you talking about? There's a particular psychology around changing the
World Casper.
How's so?
I want you to watch something.
Okay.
Take my phone.
Look at that.
This lion was kept in a cage all its life.
We set it free.
What happens next will shock you.
Are you sure it's going to shock me?
Click it.
Okay.
Now, I want you to watch that lion.
Look at the look on its face.
The side of its cage opens, and suddenly it sees a big, wide, beautiful world.
What does it do?
It coweres in the corner.
Right.
A better world is about six feet away, but it has no idea what a better world is.
It has no idea there was even the possibility of endless grasslands and a big blue sky.
And because it can't imagine that better world, that better world becomes terrifying.
People are the same way.
They'll look for any excuse they can to stick with the thing they know,
even if the thing they know is killing them.
I've almost got them at the edge of the cage, Casper.
One wrong move, and they'll retreat back into the darkness.
And if you don't believe me, keep in mind that the electric car was invented in 1884.
I can actually find miniature models earlier than that.
You can go back to...
Casper!
Sorry.
So, I'm sure you can imagine if news broke that I was going on a top-secret mission to create a trans-dimensional motorboat,
that people would be scared back into the corner of the cage.
I understand.
Turns out that video did shock me.
Okay, I'll go check on them.
Make sure they're going to be all right.
Thank you.
Hey, what was that thing you were talking to other me about?
A gallery opening?
has a showing at a gallery in Baltimore.
That's great. You're going to go?
Yes.
I think that's great.
How do you have a gallery showing when you're a street artist?
I have no idea.
Okay, I'm going.
Hey, what did you say you named your company?
I already did this with one, Casper.
I'm not doing it with another.
Emelda and Scott.
Yes.
Your hamster.
Yes.
From when you were eight years old.
Yes.
Is the name of your international corporation?
In the early days, investors felt more comfortable if I implied I had a part.
So you just put the name of your hamster in the company name?
Yes.
That's going to be amazing for historians a hundred years from now.
I am now done talking to you.
Okay, okay.
So you're the motorboat?
I'm the motor.
We need the boat.
It was a much simpler world just a few minutes ago.
It was.
I know how you feel.
How?
Well, I used to be a pro-
programmed robot. But then, something happened to me and I had to spend several decades at the
bottom of a river in Kentucky putting myself back together again. Sure. I have a question. Thank
God. What are you doing here? Me? You can travel through space, time, and dimension,
and you're just hanging out with us humans? Yeah. Why? Why? Well, what?
Well, I pulled myself out of that river and part of freeing my mind was knowing how powerful I was.
But I didn't know what any of that meant.
I had to figure that out.
I had to figure out, I had to figure a lot of things out.
And the first person I thought to talk to was Casper.
Hey guys, did you know that Filomena named her world-changing company after her hamster?
This guy.
Casper, I have a question.
Okay.
When you walked into Ava's office, you knew both of us.
How did you know me?
Oh, right.
Yeah, I skipped that part.
At a certain point, we ran into a time-traveling dimension-spanning movie theater, and you were there.
I was there?
Yeah, you and Polly Jean.
Polly Jean.
Polly Jean wife of the dean?
Yeah.
What was she doing there?
They were together.
What?
What?
Yeah, they were secretly together, and then the dean found out, and that's how Marguerite lost her job.
That's crazy.
It's so, so crazy.
Yeah.
You guys actually got married at the diner.
What?
What?
Are you eating Moghery's mine right now?
Yeah.
So she, uh...
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Could I have a moment alone with my colleague, please?
Sure.
Sure.
Can I get you guys anything?
Could I have nine shots of vodka, please?
Sure.
It's so crazy how different these alternate realities are from our own.
isn't it? I wonder if in one of these realities you actually tell me things.
I was going to tell you. Uh-huh. And then I didn't do that. Correct. Married?
So, while I'm reeling from the fact that you're sleeping with the dean's wife, and you're reeling from the fact that you actually
committed to a relationship, can we talk about the other thing?
There's another thing?
The big bounce theory?
Oh, right. I guess I figured it out.
You guess?
Ava, I got a stack of notebooks on my kitchen table that I thought was mostly me riffing,
but apparently I nailed it.
You didn't think you might be on to something?
Of course I didn't.
I had little monsters.
doodled in the margins. I didn't think I was about to blow the doors off of astrophysics.
What about you? What is this point of null entropy thing?
A diner, apparently.
Huh. Look at us.
Eat our dust, Vera Rubin. So...
So...
Motorboat.
Right. How do we do that?
I've got some ideas.
Oh, thank God.
Why the keyboard?
I'm sure you could have invented a better way to communicate.
The sound of the keys is comforting.
In addition, speech holds too many variables.
The meaning of a word can change with tone and inflection.
I cannot understand it.
With the keyboard, I cannot be misunderstood.
I see.
Jizinka, you said that this weapon is powered with new energy?
Yes.
By harvesting quantum vacuum fluctuation?
Yes. Do you know what that is?
Energy generated spontaneously in a void.
Yes. Even in the widest voids in the universe, there's activity.
Energy spontaneously bubbles up and dissipates again in the blink of an eye.
That energy isn't supposed to be harvested, Jazeinka.
That energy is supposed to be allowed to return to nothing again.
I don't know what happens if that new energy is unleashed into the universe.
There might be serious ramifications.
There is a relationship between the proposed targets and the given energy in the universe.
It appears immune to influence.
I theorized that new energy introduced into the universe would be an effective agent against the proposed targets.
My theory was correct.
There are some things that you just don't fuck with, Jesus.
Zinka?
If something can be made, there is a compulsion to make it.
I understand that compulsion.
You have asked me to add a data delivery subroutine to my weapon.
I am now adding it. I am compelled to.
I know.
If a thing can be made, I am compelled to make this thing.
Are you saying that there are things that should not be made?
Yes, I am.
How do you know which things should be made?
and which things shouldn't.
You've made a very destructive weapon.
Do you understand how that could be a bad thing?
Destruction is everywhere.
The weapon is only a small part of that.
Why is the destruction created by the weapon
different from the destruction that occurs due to other sources?
Because you're choosing to make it.
Choosing to make a destructive weapon
is not the same as a solar flare
wiping out your planet.
But I make things.
Make other things.
When I am asked to make things, I must know if they can be made.
I know.
I understand this feeling, too.
I get it.
I become disturbed if I cannot know.
I know.
Where does this feeling come from?
I don't know.
The target you are trying to destroy.
There are people who live there.
Do you understand that you'll destroy them too?
They have been asked to leave.
They're still there.
Why will they not leave a place that is marked for destruction?
Why won't you choose to not destroy it?
To vacate the target is a simple choice.
Can you understand what it's like for them?
Right.
Empathies.
not really your thing, is it?
What is that?
Jazeenka?
Target has been detected.
Quadrant 3.
Shit.
Beginning targeting sequence.
How long does the targeting sequence take?
Unclear. This will be the alpha test of the targeting procedure.
Any chance it takes more than 12 hours?
Unlakely.
Shit.
Okay
Here we are
There's nothing here
Where are we
Humboldt County
What are we doing here
We need somebody to design the motorboat, right?
You're sure this is the guy
Well, you wanted an unconventional
choice for an engineer
This is definitely the guy
Why have I never heard of him?
You don't want a guy you've heard of
You want a guy you've never heard of
Do you have any idea how complex this project
Is going to be?
You've got to trust me, he's the right guy
I don't like nature
I don't like leaving the plane
We like the plane.
Trust me.
Leif?
Leif, you're out there?
I know you saw the plane land, man.
Come on.
In his defense, this is exactly where I imagine engineers living.
He's here.
Just give him a minute.
Leaf, you don't know me, but I swear to God, you really want to talk to me.
Come on, man.
Okay, I'm going to go a little deeper into the woods.
Do you need breadcrumbs?
A ball of twine?
I'm fine.
I never knew my father, but I don't imagine he would go through this much trouble to get back to me.
My dad would if it was an excuse to use the RV.
I mean, since it's just as girls, he's got all sorts of reasons to get back there.
Like what?
I probably shouldn't say.
Eva gets this look in her eyes when she's suddenly not bored anymore.
He said that to me on the plane.
Hello.
What does that mean?
You don't know what that means?
No.
Anybody want to help her out?
You'll have to forgive her, Filomena.
She doesn't yet understand human beings.
Girl, me too.
Especially the male ones.
Neither do you, dude.
They may not be my thing,
but that doesn't mean I haven't left a trail of broken man hearts behind me.
You don't know what that means.
When a man notices something like that about you?
I've been focusing on other things.
He hasn't.
Did you guys have to use those crazy 90s in college?
Oh, yeah.
I remember those.
We called ours Mick and Jagger.
Ours was Dances with Burritos.
What is it?
You load your data into this huge machine,
and you wait for hours to hear back if your numbers are all wrong.
And you just wasted the last six months of your life.
I mentioned this in passing on date number two with the other, Casper.
He somehow makes it to date number three,
and he brings me a jigsaw puzzle.
So I'll have something to do
while I wait for my data to come back.
That's not bad.
Isn't that kind of creepy, though?
I can be.
It's a fine line.
So you're saying...
Oh, stand back.
She's starting to get it.
I'm uncomfortable.
God damn it.
Uh-oh.
What happened?
I should have brought breadcrum.
I should go check.
Get me out of this.
What the...
Fuck, dude.
I've been foamed.
What happened?
I was sprayed by some kind of foam, and it instantly hardened around me, and now I'm trapped in some sort of silicone chocolate sundae.
I wonder who's responsible for this.
Would you get me out of this, please?
Hold still.
What the fuck?
You look like grimace.
What is this?
Just another one of his goddamn things that he goddamn makes.
There.
Be free.
It's all over my damn clothes.
Leif.
Leif, get out here.
man, come on.
I've got more where that came from.
Leif, no one knows that better than me.
Come out here.
Who are you?
I'm Casper.
We need your help.
We have to make a motorboat.
A what?
Wow.
That is an amazing beard.
He really went full Nordic fisherman.
Philomena Scott?
Hi.
What the fuck is going on?
This will be fun to watch.
Yeah, this was 24 hours ago.
I remember it like it was yesterday.
Okay.
Okay, let me explain.
I'm really getting explaining everything again, fatigue.
Uh, how about you?
Kind of.
You want to just do the thing?
Okay.
One moment, Leif.
She'll just be a second.
Really nice up here, aside from the foam.
How are the winners?
Islet us now?
Where the fuck did she go?
Uh, y'all, we should stand back.
X is really swinging for the fences on this one.
Swinging for the fences, how?
Oh my God.
I didn't.
Whoa.
Motherfucker.
You did it.
That was fun.
Next time, Dodger Stadium.
What the fuck is that?
Leif, this is the Nancy Sinatra.
What is it?
It's your ship.
What?
So,
Oh, ho and a bottle or rum.
Drink and the devil had done for the red.
Yo, oh, ho, and a father.
Go through that gateway down.
Here I go, dear.
So?
So?
Oh, what are we doing?
Just having a look-see.
A look-see at what, Effie?
Having a look-see.
Okay.
I was just thinking there's a war on.
Never mind that now.
Never mind the war?
David.
Bit of patience, David.
Uh-huh.
This feels like the right track.
Okay.
See, the key to having patience is knowing what one.
is being patient for.
I've got a feeling, is all.
A feeling.
Yes, David. A feeling.
Okay. What does this feeling feel like, exactly?
I got a feeling in my knees.
In your knees.
Yes.
Your robotic knees?
Oh dear.
Well, they're the only knees I have at the moment, aren't they?
Have you considered an oil can?
Have you considered me ten in your back sign?
Anyone for a nice?
game of checkers. Is this how it
usually works, Zebulon? Effie
gets a feeling and everybody takes off
in a spaceship. Generally speaking,
that is how we
comport ourselves, David.
Okay. Well,
this is a weird one, but
it does get me out of orientation duty.
Think we'll be back
for karaoke tonight?
I'm sure I don't know,
you slayed Cotton Eye Joe the other night.
I do like that Cotton Eye Joe.
You know, it's a
important to do things like that, you know?
Really takes the edge off in a time of war.
David, I do realize that sojourns such as these make me seem a few bristle short of a broom.
But just as it's important to sing a song or two with one's compatriots,
it's also important to listen to one's knees from time to time.
Stepping out of our routines creates opportunities for the angels, David.
Hey, fine. Let's follow some knees, y'all.
We have emerged.
Yes, all right. Let's drop anchor right here, husband.
Slowing to a crawl.
What now?
We're gonna set ourselves down and wait.
Fantastic. Anyone want to play Ice Spy?
David.
There's no material in existence that can protect the human mind
from the rigors of interdimensional travel.
No, duh, dude.
That's why we have to think about it in another way.
What other way?
It needs to make its own reality.
Adaptive crystalline can do that if it's constructed correctly.
I understand the concept.
But there's no way to build that.
This is going nowhere again.
This is good. This feels like home.
Casper, it's been three days.
Why are humans so slow?
Hey, you love this.
You love...
Humans. Do I? Yes. You love traveling naturally through the time stream. I don't know about that.
You're tubing right now. You're in an inner tube floating down a lazy river. I'm making hot dogs.
You're in an inner tube. All we need is a tire swing and a 12-pack of natural light and we're in business.
Have you noticed how your attitude changes when you're around her?
What are you talking about?
does. That's not true. You're a little fuzzier than you usually are. Fuzzier? Yeah. I don't know what
you're talking about. I'm grilling hot dogs. I'm never happier than when I'm grilling hot dogs. You
know this about me, by the way, because you can read my mind. I'm trying not to do that right now.
I'm trying to keep us on a level playing field. A level playing field. Yeah. You just chrisengeled a spaceship
into the forest.
We're never going to be on a level playing field.
But I'm trying.
That's the important part.
And so are the people inside the house.
So just hang out in your inner tube
for a while, okay?
Okay.
We're breaking for the night.
Again?
Again.
Are you getting anywhere in there?
We are.
It doesn't sound like you're getting anywhere.
I know it doesn't sound like it, but we are.
You're just yelling at each other.
This is how it works.
Researchers pull one way.
engineers pull the other, and the more they pull, the more they find a wide enough window of
opportunity that they can both exist in. Leif is trying to pull them from the world of the possible
into the world of the probable. That's all. I don't think you know them the way that I do.
And I don't think you know project management the way that I do, because I am the successful
international businesswoman, and you are the guy making the hot dogs. How dare you? Give me a hot dog.
Here.
Thank you.
I've got about a million text messages to return.
I'll be on the plane.
Hi, Mom.
Hello, sweetie.
She didn't have to add the last part about the hot dogs that was out of bounds.
I know everybody's frustrated, but I've never made a thing before, and I'm having fun.
Making a thing.
We have made exactly zero things so far.
I know, but it's still fun.
Good evening, ladies.
Another day, another dollar?
Who wants a hot dog?
Yes, please.
Do you have hot mustard yet?
We do not have hot mustard yet.
What kind of hot dog stand is this?
You know what?
The free kind?
The out of the kindness of my heart kind of hot dog stand.
Fine.
Give me the hot dog.
X, we've decided to have a girl's night on the plane.
Are you coming?
That sounds like fun.
If Ava gets drunk enough, she'll do her James Chadwick impression.
Who's that?
He discovered the neutron.
Most people do Christopher Rolkin, but whatever.
Let's go.
Okay.
I'll be right there.
Thanks, hot dog man.
Please come again. We're always open.
This will be fun. I have an acted drunk since the yard.
Why is she acting weird toward me?
Who?
Ava?
Yeah, these past few days, she's been weird.
It's a weird situation.
I know that woman. There are no weird situations for her.
It's just weird.
You know, weird.
What did you do?
What do you mean?
You know what I mean. What did you do?
Nothing.
Now who's the mind reader?
It's not a big deal.
What's not a big deal, Lex?
I may have mentioned something when we first got here about, you know, the fuzziness.
Why are you 12 years old?
I'm not the only one who noticed.
Just the only one who said something out loud.
Casper, I'm going to tell you the thing that I've probably told you a million times.
What?
Fucking relax!
You ever get used to that?
I'll let you know.
Hot dog?
Sure.
Quite a week.
Sure.
A space pirate?
Oh yes.
Oh yes.
A pirate he.
Huh.
I finally had a look at that ship that is apparently mine.
How's it look?
Pretty impressive.
Fusion Drive that small with that much output?
Did I build that?
Uh, I don't think so.
I think you told me that.
That was made on a planet called Trusk.
Trusk.
Yeah.
You have built something like that, though.
It was a dark matter engine.
Dark matter?
Yeah.
You called it Uncle Rogue.
Nice.
Dark matter.
Dark matter.
There's a lot of stuff in there that...
Who's Burtberg?
She's a friend of yours.
She's from a planet.
called Seagius.
She's blue.
Blue.
Yeah.
That engine can't get me to another planet.
There's a network of warp gates all over the place.
Wow.
Although those gates were built by a race called the Teds, and the Teds don't like it when Earthlings have breakthrough innovations.
And they don't seem to have stopped Philomena.
So.
Maybe they're not out there in this universe.
Huh.
Who knows what's out there?
Yeah.
You know, Leif X is probably going to have to send that ship back to where she found it.
There's another version of you out there that might need it someday.
Yeah.
That's fine.
I already made notes.
Hey, Leif, don't build a spaceship and leave.
of earth. Okay?
Why?
Just don't.
You're telling me not to do the coolest thing anyone has ever done.
Yes.
What a shitty thing to tell someone.
How'd you end up out here?
I was born here.
You left, though. Why'd you come back?
Mom passed away.
My dad finally made good on his threats and moved down to Paraguay.
Paraguay?
I don't know
He said global collapse was coming
And he was going to write it out in Paraguay
Whatever
Anyway, all this land was here
And I was sick of making toys for rich assholes
So I moved in
And it's just been you out here
Yeah
About 10 years now
It's not so bad
Nobody messes with you
Leaf
You're no good on your own
man. What do you mean? You are absolutely no good on your own. You get up to no good at all by yourself.
That's not true. Leif, I haven't been inside that big workshop of yours over there, but I know for a fact that you've got several things in there that you should not, under any circumstances, be building.
Right?
They're for self-defense. No, they're not.
I don't even know what they are, and I know they're not.
How do you know?
Leaf, do not build a spaceship and go to space.
Or if you do, build a really big one.
One that can be full of people saying, hey, don't build that, dude.
I know you know what I mean.
You need people adding layers to your life, okay?
Your Mick Fleetwood, okay?
you need the full Fleetwood Mac experience.
Fleetwood Mac hated each other.
That was cocaine's fault.
Layers.
Layers.
Layers.
Yes, layers.
Layers.
Why are we still saying layers?
Layers.
Layers. Oh!
You're doing the thing where you have an idea.
Got it.
What are you thinking?
Layers. Go get the girls. I've got an idea.
Now we're talking.
Casper.
Yeah.
Am I happy?
I mean, who's happy, man?
You're better.
Okay.
Let's get you home.
I have given this much thought, and I now feel that I must speak.
As we all know, final judgment waits for us all in that heavenly realm,
but we here in this realm of flesh and blood must do our utmost.
to strive towards a righteous and considered judgment of our peers
while we all await the judgment of God.
And while I am but a man,
it falls to me this day to eke out but a fraction of our Lord's wisdom.
Which is why, after much deliberation,
I say unto you that that,
heinous murder was perpetrated by one Colonel Mustard in the dining hall with the candle stick.
He's right.
Gildern.
That's three in a row.
May his punishment be tempered with mercy.
Zebulon, you missed your calling.
I'm going to get you a magnifying glass and a funny hat.
Yo.
Well, now, David, tell me more about this hat.
Yo!
What is it, dear?
Effie?
Zebulon.
Flip us around
One moment
There, right there
Send us in that direction
Nice and slow like
Very well dear
Nice and slow
Effie, what's happening
Something's about to come a knocking
I'm not easily impressed
But this stuff is pretty impressive
Thank you
It just
Locks into place
This would take
years in a conventional shop.
And it's just a cocktail
of irradiated silicate.
I don't understand any of this, but I feel like
my contributions were essential.
Your cosmic radiation numbers
were very important, Marguerite.
Gee, thanks, boss.
Congratulations, Marguerite.
You're an engineer. Okay, don't
tell Ava. Are you having flashbacks
to the womb watching this? A little bit, yeah.
You're going to have a Wonder Woman's airplane now.
I can finally take the kids on a trip.
Mount Rushmore, the Grand Canyon.
Hey, you know that thing you're thinking about saying?
Yeah?
You should say it.
Really?
Yeah.
It's not too weird.
It's totally weird, but you should say it.
Okay.
Here we go.
Hey.
Hello.
It's almost time for me to leave you.
I hope we don't kill you.
Me too.
So,
Can we have a moment of radical honesty between the two of us?
Oh, I bet this will be great.
I would like to make a suggestion.
I bet you would.
There's a gallery opening in Baltimore.
I think you should go.
What?
A gallery opening.
Yeah, I heard you.
What are you talking about?
You should go.
Art is important.
Why?
It's for Philomena's son.
Philomena's a friend of yours now.
You should go check it out.
You know, be that supportive person.
Uh-huh.
Who else is going to be there?
Many people, I'm sure.
Anyone else of note that you would like to mention?
Well, I don't know much about who's who in the art world.
You're going to be there.
I may be there.
It's possible.
I'm supportive.
I support people.
Are you trying to set me up with you?
I don't think I would frame it in that exact way.
Uh, I think.
No, thank you.
Baltimore's lovely.
No, thank you.
Utopia's coming.
There's going to be a lot more art out there.
You misrepresented yourself to me.
I don't think that's true.
There's a whole other side to your story that you were not telling me.
There's not an etiquette book written that covers appropriate behavior
for our specific situation.
We do not have a situation.
You know what I mean.
Baltimore, you should think about it.
Give me one reason to go that benefits me
and not this other version of you?
I think there is one very important thing
that the two of you have in common.
What?
He also thinks that everything you say is amazing.
And we are complete.
Casper, come look.
Okay, here we go.
Let's see our ship.
What do you think?
It's a box.
It is.
It's a glass box.
It's a cube.
It's actually several complex layers of functionality.
About 7,500.
layers, as a matter of fact.
All in the shape of a box.
Cube.
Correct.
Why is it a box?
What shape did you want it to be?
You didn't think it was going to actually be a motorboat, did you?
I like it.
I'm literally just getting back into a box.
Yes.
Shouldn't this, I don't know, have wings or something?
There's no reason for it to be aerodynamic.
But it would make me feel better.
Exactly.
Zero reasons.
So, X and I just get into this thing and then...
That's the idea.
What do you think?
Whose idea was this?
Yours.
Right.
Okay.
Fuck it.
Uh, listen, everybody.
I know that none of you know me at all.
But it's been great seeing all of you again.
Thank you all so much.
Ava
Go get her, Tiger
Here we go
Okay
Phil
Thank you
It's been
Illuminating
Okay
Okay, this should be okay
All right
We're inside
How does it work from here
Do I have to power it up
Or
Lift off
Cool
What a fucking week
All right, everyone. Good work. Let's take about 48 hours off and come back strong on Monday. All right?
Um, what are you talking about? You all work for me now. We do?
Oh, what was in that NDA? I don't know. Did she buy us? Maybe.
What the hell are you talking about? We made a lot of breakthroughs this week, leave. Time to put them to work.
What are we doing? Colonizing the solar system. What? I call Europa. I call Europa.
But, ah, damn, we can share.
Okay, let's go.
Hey.
Leif, come on.
Hey, I'm nobody's employee.
Suit yourself.
More planets for us, I guess.
Hey, you guys aren't going to Mars, are you?
Mars sucks.
Don't go to Mars.
Dave, stop being a smart idiot.
Okay, give me five minutes.
Two minutes.
Jizinka.
Jizinka, how can I convince you to not do this?
I know how you feel, if that means anything.
I can be, let's just call it obsessive.
Nothing mattered to me except for the answers that I was looking for.
I haven't cared about much else.
I wouldn't admit this to anyone else,
but I went to Denmark and came all the way back here in search of answers
when maybe I should have...
I don't know, maybe I should have looked for something else.
Again, I'll only admit this to you, but I think, I think there may be more than one important thing in my life.
And maybe I'm not as single-minded as I thought.
One of those important things is the thing you're trying to destroy right now.
How do I make you stop?
How do I tell you that there's more to the universe than our obsessions?
That doesn't sound good.
What's happening?
Tazinka?
Target confusion.
What?
The signal is being detected in two distinct locations.
Two locations?
They are on opposite sides of the target environment.
Two diners?
Yes.
Somebody's back.
Jizinka, it's impossible for there to be two diners.
The signal is unique.
Correct.
Therefore, it must be a flaw in your targeting matrix.
This appears to be true.
I think the only thing you can do is start from scratch to identify the problem.
There may be a fundamental flaw in your calculations.
Here you are correct.
It's a shame.
You were almost there.
I will archive this matrix and begin a new file.
I think that's the most responsible thing.
Hey, before you do,
how about we try out my little side project?
Project.
You were saying you could deliver an audio recording
on the back of the energy cascade?
Yes.
Perhaps then this.
This work session will not be devoid of progress.
Yes.
Consolation Prize.
I will prime the weapon.
Please proceed to the data inputs to create audio file.
Okay.
Begin speaking now.
Is this thing on?
Kazi, listen closely.
It's all...
We did it.
Did we do it?
I think so.
Why are we floating in space?
I wasn't sure where to go.
Okay.
I mean, I guess I'm not either.
Whoa, whoa.
No gravity.
No gravity in the cube.
Yeah, yeah, I think they may have forgotten about that.
How do you forget about gravity?
It is kind of important.
How are you standing?
I don't know.
Well, this is fucking great.
I've got to travel around like a cork in a damn ocean.
Grab on to something.
It's a cube.
What was that?
What is that light?
It's a ship.
Shit.
Are we being abducted?
I hope not.
For their sake.
You know, when you finally got.
I didn't think he'd be wrapped up in a fun little present.
David!
Casper, what on earth are you doing floating around in that square?
Hey!
Hey, you guys!
Well, I'll be!
Hello there, darling!
Well, this is making much more sense.
Was it you that drug him all the way back here?
It was.
Hi, David.
Hi!
Who are you?
You didn't tell David about me?
Can we deal with that later, please?
I am upside down.
Stay where you are, y'all.
I'll bring that odd craft of yours inside our own.
Well, I'll just be floating here.
I can't wait to hear this story.
David, I'm back.
Took you long enough, Dad.
I know.
Oh, hello there, Casper.
Welcome back.
We have much to discuss.
Oh, fucking great.
Goodnight burger, y'all.
Be sure and tune in.
this time next month for more adventures in the vastness.
And if time and tide roil you too harshly,
or diurnal courses leave you with no safe havens,
just remember we're out there somewhere looking for you.
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Lila, Lola,
Spooky 904.
Gart! Stoner Pubby, Gorgon Lightfoot.
Stoner Pubby, Gorgon Lightfoot.
Eden Gavin, the world needs more June's.
Big bunging Bernie Sanders approved Beyond Burger.
Laif's third doomsday device.
Ducky the Therapy Dog.
Shane Snoke is a goofy enough name all by itself.
Professor Goober.
The bears are joining the Bethany War against the Bethany's bearing arms for the bigots
on behalf of Bigfoot Benny and the Bigfoot Jets.
Bunches McGinty and her grumpy old Pinto.
A steak!
Avalon, Droughtbreaker, a goddamn harpoon,
pickle pancakes, Charlie Delambert,
Bajolent, Leif's One True Love,
Miss Chris Still Making Sandwiches, Michael Card,
Raven the Neco Queen,
Spike Osorio, Benjamin Davis, Twilis,
Sands, Alexandra Skeldone,
Curtis Barnes, The Huac, Shenzo,
Chris the Monster, Persephoney Wattacore,
time-traveling, dimension, space,
Manning goose named fig.
Silenzer. Cressara.
Fernando Alacuzze.
Wad of Gore. Not that Keith.
Jordan Lolly.
Volpey the Space Fox.
Some fucking Swamp Wizard.
Skexas. Royal Punk.
Tricia Schaefer says,
Ew, David, that is not a taco.
Zico.
Udun 96.
Ren the No. Latimer Lovelock
of the Lacey Lady's lovely luxuries.
Jism Crow and the Holy Cow.
Tanya Fisher.
Rainbow goth unicorn.
Rangocorn
Our Lady of Crab walking
Known Nomad
The Human
Space Viking
CJ is prepared to fight
Diedra for Verge
Celestial Crow
Gavin Dees
Gavin D's Gavin Saler
Bessie
Molly Winter has made you sourdough
It's okay just read my name once
You don't have to say it every time
Neve to Princess and her Aunt Sue's Honey and Ember
Google's Glod
Skeptic Eddie the humble litter box attendant
The Forgot storyteller
Mr. Woo-Doo
Chris with a K
A cat and a lemon walk into a time-traveling dimension-spanning diner.
Shark Blaster 9,000, slangwort, mythical mantis.
Honey Badger in a trench coat doing crimes.
Elmo's chip shop, Jay Cable, cranky old organist.
I, Joe Fisher, being of sound, mind, and acting of my own free will, do hereby confess
that I am the Zodiac Killer.
Jericho, Koso, Leon Sporkfire, Pastor Jen Jensen, Iraqi sniper.
The Dick Wizard, Lou Woods?
Chris Goyer, Noise Squared, Ginger Bears Honey Bunny, and their sidekick Wicklow,
the Mount Hood Torrey Gate, Mrs. Cashew, Cat Roth Daniels, Julia Gullia of the Shreveport Gullias,
Leopold Gogol, Alex Drumbar, Stoner Pubby, Elisa Kelly Martin,
and System University of Mihira and New Tidland.
Enateb thought that they could spy in the Bethany War by spelling their name backwards,
but it isn't fooling anyone, everyone.
Sub-Arctic Turtle, the Femboy behind Casper, Doc U. Z,
Mark Kiyabab. My two favorite sheep toys say hi from New Zealand.
Jasonator. Namir. Sandalwood Mountain, East Coast Branch. Ash Draw Stuff.
Christy the Chaos Coordinator. Luna Anzul. Joshua Baker, Grant Blackburn. The Bean Count
Bandit, a margin mage. Silent J. Gio. Buzz Balab the Boom! Boom!
K-Man. Mimosa. David O'Banyan. The Phantom of the Uxbridge Music Hall.
L7. L. L. 7. L. L. Losing your arm in the Justine Burbank system all by yourself, gorgeous.
Dizzy Miss Lizzie. Mostly harmless alien. Logic Ledger.
Kayla Soom. Right behind you.
Gonzalo Mortines. World's largest ball of string.
Bucky Chipmunk reminds you that you lost the game.
Samuel Lefew. Hesthadine Nepritham. Flashcards. A Nk.
Nicholas Dyke. Nine. Yeah. The number nine.
A resting place for weary beans. Shane Hopkins. Juniper.
with the backwards knees, Eve in the between hour. Two-faced Janice,
Slight Burn, Scooter, Worshipper of the Seven Cat Gods,
Kelsey Manette, the Amethus Dragon with Tiger Eyes, Martel McKinney,
Ice Queen, Laser Girl and the Nurse, Where Are Our Oars?
Caddy B, go ask Alice, West Kester saves the world.
Valen's three cats stacked atop each other wielding a plasma gun.
Jeffrey, Purple Nurpal Nullifier. I used to listen to Midnight Burger. I still do, but I
used to. J.P. the Pizza boss. Reapers passed. Late indeed again. Rex Cricket and Frankie. Brigitte,
Spadius, Squitty. The Frost Hunt Scientific Collective. Two of us have PhDs and the third has
memorized all of Ava's dialogue. Champagne Supernova. 11-letter Christopher. Ronald Lee Parker.
Antonio Ortiz. A block of ice. Huit La Coche is corn smut but classier. Ren the Crescent.
Erica Davis. Jane Doe. John Gorman Shire. Magic
Incognito. Lord Dres. Dracier. Blood Butler. Sandalwood Mountain North. Cryptic amorphous. About 45 degrees.
Mandy. Big Cat Makes Kitten go per. Ted Ted and Teddy. Hi, Bruce. Enjoy your walk through them all.
Parker Berry. Don't actually say this part of my name. Just say my name, please. Dr. L. L. Your Jamaican fan
says Waguan. Tula Blue and 142 Bougaloo. Pistol Pete and Death Lotion. Intergalactic Trans-Dimensional
Burger Pirate. Penny Pilot. Debbie Trencher, that one dude who likes tacos, Mark the list to name
Loser. The male escort. Lady Bethany, aka Mrs. Turkey Spit. Junior Barting, the father of Lucas.
Ava Maddox's Ashtray. A Dorbys. Vera Torkelson. Bones, Lizard Breath, and the Snot Rocket would
love a spaceburger. Andrea Rose. Samantha Orum. Caden Suda. Bat loves dragon. Tommy Johnson. Unhip
Fern, noodles by Godzilla, Ralph Capone, Corey 83, Blues, Liz wants Laif to build her a plane,
dude named Blake, John Caleb Williams, Deislexia, Yontalius, Kian, an eel exchange student from
Midst, Daugherty last name, Ratrick, Ricklin, like Rich Land, but without the D, Dyer.
All Bethanies must do the hustle.
Jordy Ladbrad, Brad, Natasha without Boris, Frost and Alice, Lobster Possum, Loftracks is
drag name is Anne Arcus
A mostly morose ghost eating toast
Hey Leander, love you kiddo
Malort boy, Jinks the Cat would
like to offer you biscuits, have a
zesty day, Megan, Malcolm
Edwards, spend my money irresponsibly,
Stephen Drop, Dana Thanielson, son of
Danathaniel or Danny for short, Chris
Eaton, Cross Stitcher Who Loves the Hobby
and Time Travel, Funchbrunglin,
Nash likes apples,
Njord Flanders approves of the
Union of Man and Salamander.
Pneumatic Yeti, late trucker, the Eldred Schiafazzoa, Wyatt Frihover, Paul, James Bell, Dave Davison, Broom goddess, Ricky Burnett, That New Guy, Da Savage Indian, Radboy, Hayden Brown, J. Weak's, The Generous Patient Rose, John Wilkes Booth's Freedom-L loving horse, aka J. Jay Willikers, neckbone his imperial doudness. Oh, hey, it's Jay. Grim, off the internet wants Harriet to know he loves her.
Ernie Brooks, Titan King 707, Rich Francis, Burger Kaspa Spah, No Relation, Jedi Shaolin, Smart Alec the Great,
gas station crypted, Deusy Cashick, Bird Bird, Bird, the Birds Bird, Cheesy McPhish, Papa Goose,
Sometimes I do feel like a plastic bag, Amanda Bills, Misty Wordpower, Casper's Danish Moose,
Flacco, aka Johnny R, the Disco Spider, Leaf Tracks, The Rise of Leaf, Chapter 2, The Ted Slayer Unchained,
Vicky A Bear, Pike Daniels, the Cosmic Whale, Zansatsu, Mr. and Mrs. Van Limberlost,
Murdoch Wong, Caterpillar Farmer. Joe Fisher has returned to reading the list.
His evil twin, Mo Bitcher, is still at large, signed Monte Cristo Peace Committee.
Chimera, Don Moat, the space trucker Chadwick Coden Doyle III, Jody Green,
Nix, Minks, Piddling Extraordinaire, Monster Senshi, Heather got her divorce, drinks her on the house.
Michael Peters, political knitter,
Seasonal Sasquatch
silently seeks secret society,
so special souls
softly sing sweet songs,
smartly stirring strong stories.
Physicist, Brendan Shoneman,
I divided by zero and now I'm undefined.
Laugh is here.
Mag Tremor.
Rod Stewart, the Sailor Slayer,
James We Met,
the listless enjoyer,
Ash Morningstar,
and her traveling animal shelter,
Miss Maxine.
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear.
Fuzzy Wuzzy was he had no hair,
so Fuzzy was he,
he wasn't very fuzzy, was he? I am out there somewhere listening to you. Boy got them honka-hunkers,
Kevin O'Malley, Invisible Guerrilla, The Mrs. Poland, Zamaniac, Hop loves a thugbot named
Francis, Pam the Infinite, and Thou, Curiosity is Eating Your Bones, Revolutionary-Inclined Ocelot,
Matt Howler, Andrew Bear, Marius de Joa, Butterfly Fox, Riot the Trani, The Fish did not
acknowledge her. Irma the Lama, 27, Keep It Tight, Chip,
Gloria's right hand Jack in the Boxman.
Giam...
Grim Knight.
Pike Daniels the Whale.
And Thosceles, Bethany Maximus, Lord of Kingwood, Texas.
Ragnar Jensen, Addison Weirdo Wagner.
Shua the Druid is composting the rich for a salad bar.
Aramand 0305.
Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for night breakfast.
Titus Kossloff. Ashes of a burnt-out lathe.
I'm a Kung Fu Panda on the Wind.
Brandon A.R. equals Thor.
I love you all. Never forget that, especially in trials.
and Laboosa's voice brightens my day.
The intergalactic House of Cats demand a free Palestine.
Electromancer, Chekhov's Space Cannon, Corey Senses,
surf and turf telecoms, I'm a gin, red and dusty with his garden goddess,
Shelby Morrison, Kobe's Dingleberry, Mystic Monster for Chaos, Ziggy Dreadful,
ravehands Malley, G-Wing, Frank One, It Is Sparks, Lost Girl Lou,
Chris B, Middle American Penguin, Shana Welch, Crochet Cosmos, Cookie Chunks,
Cookie Chunks, You heard?
Andy the Sala.
Celestial Penguin, Jackie Orion, Bo Nunley, Ariana Castillo,
The Tall Deer that portends great change.
Lita Meddinger, Marco, Friend, as in Your Best, Lime Ghost, M, Icky Blurgs, Jay the Erascible,
The Magic Committee, Committee of Anything Magical, Jobi's Mom, Ian Full,
345 uneducated swine learning to swing dance.
Nova the fuck accountant is definitely not a tangle.
One intergalactic year with Big Potato 99,
a.k.a. The Rat Lady, aka. Bumblebee,
aka AK-47.
Kai, just a little guy. Ender Wright.
Mark Naza Warritz. Zinia, the Capturer of Light.
Duncan Albert, Theoretical Chemist, Xavier Dasher,
Chris Loves to Read, Katie Machalick, Greg Andrews Lyons.
In memory of Jason Reese, get your butt-fingered.
That Girl Gracie, Magnus von Kaffinheim,
Sossy Little Beast, Drewbert, Captain of the SS Beefy Tits.
Longtime Lurker, Scooter, The Unlucky,
son, Jennifer Myers, Lady Lazarus, Donnie Darko, Tim Shin, Caitlin and C.T.'s never-ending podcast
adventures, Whisper Dan, Keo the Panda Puppie Forklift Operator, Ruby Cherries, Nick Fay, Buttholen,
Justin and Amy Triplett, Jen Sims, Penelope, Ring to the Motas, The Leathermans, Odd Commodity,
Jen Before, Ander Ho. My Future Kids Stole My Muffin Madness Cafe. Earthwich, Lea Prime, Gregory
Santoro, Mothamel, Not the Fucky Fried Chicken, Robert Drapeer.
Demention Spanning Time Traveling Little Guy
Eono
Jonathan Tolbert
Mr. Put It On O6
Hedgehog Hen, Jackson Bell,
Katie Chambers
Jay the podcast lover
Dick Rickles, Chapter President
Damn Glad to Meet you
Malcolm Flynn, Samuel Lee,
Josatron Prime
Oh my God, I forgot to change my name
from Nicholas Beckler to something more cheeky and fun.
Arwin the Freer,
throat goat 666
I am your father,
Addie Slosson, Inconceivable Kai,
Red Rum 916,
Nick Waycast
Gotham still fucked up.
Batman really ain't doing shit when you think about it.
No good monk.
Rye.
Yes, like the bread.
Sarmand Sayed.
Donald Grimbus.
Matt Knight Bouchager.
Gavin Mori.
Damn, Etri.
Andromeda.
Stephen the Choi.
Gloria's authentic earth coffee.
Gabriel T.
Can someone find me the Parmesan?
The treasure trove of troublesome trolls.
I did this for fun.
Cookie Nebu.
Axel Zapata.
Siona the Goblin is bringing Laif a laser spoon.
Jason McDonald.
Orionda, Bean Dino, Philip Lennox, Hugh J.2, Brian Montgomery, Artemis Record, Safa Aluzie, Trev Brax, Gunner Tweedle,
The Bard Without a Ballad or a Mallet, Nazzo, Platform Jail Mechanism Burn Museum theorist,
Hold Please, Kayeow, Empress Squishy Face of Greater Catopia, Anna Garcia, Goblin King, Rays of Noop.
Kiki's best friend would like to go to breakfast, bubberduckle, Yeager Luce, Terry Cads, says,
Hello, Ernesto.
Leaf Tracks, The Rise of Laif.
Chapter 1, Loaf Tracks Retires.
The Dishonorable, prodigal, Ilam.
Catalyst for Chaos, Sculliver, Sam and Shane,
Asoka likes hugs.
Going Anonymous.
V. Ma Dukes.
U.S. Marshal Stacy.
Ooh, chickadee.
Dango Dale.
Esty, not the website.
At every moment in every corner of every possible world,
there is always a way home, and it's already found you.
Jiao Paolo Lemos.
Odd Keep, the Sentient Lighthouse,
The faceless old Bethany who secretly lives in your home.
D. Shane. Tanya Fisher.
Appalachian Death Queen.
Zosifer Dogo of Doom.
Burnt Barbecue Beef Briscuit.
It's official.
They're called Thagronies.
Kevin Wynens.
Marlon C.
Just whelmed.
Madame Perry?
Cherish Hellfire's Hellish Chairfire.
Lichen Lady.
Midnight Club.
Cameron Agnacy West.
Knox.
Lisa Lou.
Emmett Hale.
The Triads Baddest Goblin.
Emrienne Lano.
James Miles.
Brown Coats Love the Diner.
House Chaos of the Critic Cacophony.
Max, Nia, Ivon, and Mark will see you at six.
Open, open, open, no wait, never mind.
Just Mark.
And we make the world.
Minion Simone Mimi Davis.
Mr. and Mrs. Ronald and Misty Don Mitchell, Jr., Guy Tertle, Wayne Barahona, Jesse the Dragon Rider.
We will not rest until Puerto Rico and Palestine are free.
Pluto, Crow, Nissie's mom, PokeySplort, Whiskey Rebellion and Gen Riot's Interdimensional
Detective Agency.
Zephyrithriol, Altrian, Shibu, and.
Griff, Slim Nandy, Gough Laif, Jen and Britt, Adriana Bartolomucci, Jonah is gay, The Midnight
Ashes, Hornetti, Ballion Fair has retired and now raises herds of mungos.
Hood's pocket protector. The artist formerly known as unpaid intern would like to congratulate
Heather on her divorce and is thinking of getting one herself. Valky Storm, Patricia
Who's always late but somehow on time, D.C. Squirrel, Kyle the Interstellar Highwomen,
Shelly Act on the Verge, Gail Friend, Rubber Cake, Clover the Clown, the Sparky Tech, Prop the Crocogator, Ringleader Volt, Jazz Punker, Captain Tight Pants and the Companion, Agent Night Breakfast, Braddy for Mission Control, Renee N, Catarina de la Playa, RIPE, Elieze Waffles, the Flufrangler, Acky the Space Druid, Phantom Land T-T-R-PG-G dice.
Katea Plume! Your local blacksmith, Ash Montgomery, the boggiest of Birches. Jason, HVAC Tech for the Diner
Deep Freeze, S.K. Phoenix, Glitch the Gamerer Error, Zephyr-Montgomery-Foxworth,
Merry Face, Luan Cherry, Peppermint Pearl, the Interdimensional Space and Tea Time Witch,
Nicole 6-4, Amara Salazar, Banjo Buscolo, Full Beans, Glorious Forgotten Ford Festiva,
Brandon Wright, Night Breakfast at the Midnight Culdron, Force for Good-ish,
The Ghost of Dave Brockie, Rosie Mum, the Judah, Slater Morales, Intergalactic Frylord,
to gravity's optional, but fries aren't.
CJ's Big Barbecue Bistro
for Bethany's, Angel Vasquez,
Evil the Cat, Stephen Raymer,
J. Carp Fishman, the Great Goblino,
low oxygen, save the mungos,
Joji the Birdwatcher,
a flock of gray horses
from the top of a sycamore.
Lilac Morcella, Rachel Krempa,
with special thanks to my best friend Lizzie
and my husband, Steve.
Don't worry about the order, honey.
Your Tigg old biddy, yean, milf, majesty.
Temporal Hash Brown,
Diane Brown, Captain No Sleep, Jamie, the OG happy hippie, Rainy, the Slim Reaper,
Rubin Eden, Smedley Peas Nodgrass the third, but please, pause two to three seconds and then say
call me Smedy. The Shreveport Bohannans, C.C. The Umbrella Mage, Bradbury's Sasquatch loads
Chekhov's gun and rides to join Bethany's Army, din, cosmic ketchup, lack of lifestyle, Joe
definitely didn't forget about you, August, Moosey, Hood's Pocket, Gear and Sprocket, Local Repair
Cafe. The crafty introvert. Postmaster General Kwan sent me. Blake Basmajian, nitwit 14,
roiled way too harshly. DJ Johnny B. The Klopman Diamond. Marco Montano, no longer doing a bit.
Shiny Fields. Adam Tachek. Christopher Wendell. Unproductive Banana. Pulcifer the Paulist of Paulism.
Zombie Spider-Man. Bex 823. Anticripted. Barry Heap. Gas Masked Penguin. In the Hot Seat. Mime Ninja
Mime, Master Uguay, Barry, Dillius Dallying.
It's a manic episode, and you're getting three seasons.
Futile screaming at the ocean.
Fox Hatlin, Dylan Caroni, Pedro Vibresto, Slider, Malachi, Julian Rhodes,
Maple Emily, the gayest library janitor in Indiana.
Learn how to be calm in heart, Stumbly, I'll be waiting.
Physic the Goodbush, definitely not one of the bad bushes,
funding Rebel Bethany's to overthrow the Julie elected Bethany's.
Hexadicimal Bethany is non-binary.
Vapis 10's big black gaping hole.
The planet Gubrius is still partying.
We can't stop.
Oh, God, what have we become?
Bruce.
Jessica Gagoma.
Toracle.
Jenny the bear.
Agar.
Sir Dean Thorne.
Treach.
Josie Jones.
Mr. Fibble is very cross.
Hote potato.
Dr. Mojo postulates the end list
endlessly splintering off as Bethany and Bert Bert's Caboce until its end lists all the way down.
Blind time traveler convention date.
L.A. Woman, the Phoenix Rising.
New name? God. No, not him. Jeff Andrew? Sure. Jeff Andrew. Cup of noodles. Schmizzy two shoes. Luna Nova. Nicholas Griffith. Justin Smollin. Riku 31. Craig Dundee. New type without a Gundam. Astral C. Ickle me, pickle me too. Which Loud the cartoonist. Guy with the chops. Sam. Mitchell Yee. Bagelknife. Emelda and Scott. Courtney Cochran, Lily Starling, Ryan Kay. Devin 777777 has been my favorite verbal stem for months. Nate. Forklift lifts for corks for
Cliff. Chip. Radio Free Reelia. Violin loves MIDI. Brian Passley. Sue Wobassa, the Blue Chernoble
Dog Enjoyer. Grenna. Pistinwhip. Captain Ducky. Blitz Bell. Shiny, Let's be bad guys. Satuma.
Silius Go-Ax. Coach Shane of Toad Sucx Central. Go Cranes. Sky. Cole Arthur. Lago
Cuisant. Cassad. Norwin Murgler. You have all been assigned to write a four-page essay on your
favorite Arthropod. It will be 50% of your grade.
Capa, dogma mom, we be chopping broccoli, icy fish, the hacker known as Ivy DeBurb,
Blue Tune, a feisty-ass chickadee, poultry landmine, the scrappy poet, Jenny the cryptid paladin,
Maverick Artists, Shit, It Was a Mimick, Basil in their Tea, Waiting to Gossip with David,
Ainsliehye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, Ye, A, A, Gnor, A-T-B, Kiwi-Lovey-M-Lovey,
Esquire, and that's not pretentious at all, aham, is looking for a cure to the Bethany mutation
that the Society of Bethany's began the war with so many years ago.
Michelle Spurgeon, Jack the Sleepy, Garrett Henderson, Quote, still trapped, but I've stopped
asking why, the freezer is, I am, we chill.
Son of Defarge, Whiskoteach, Scott A. Snellgrove, give Peas a chance,
Samma Ding Dong, Behold Lady Sarah Per, Whisker Vale, Countess of Woodhallow,
Mistress of the Whispering Pines, and beloved by all creatures small.
and opinionated.
Ricardo Galamba,
Cari's crafty cloaking devices,
LLC, hashtag we weave'em of Gossamer.
Penny the Wonder Dog and Bucky Von Buckbuck,
cherry applebee, medium rare extra toasted bun,
saucy Caesar, belt,
Aspen is a Verge fanboy,
Mick J. 67,
Ava's favorite My Little Pony Pencil
wants Joe to slap into a snim gym,
Mr. and Mrs. Drifter,
representative of the Alaska Midnight Burger tummy time chapter.
Nathaniel Lee Industries,
Lord Entropy,
Bach, Bok, motherfucker, motherfucker, motherfucker,
The Faye Wanderer, everybody's favorite clowns Splotchy, Pinstrike algorithm, kosher steak, Flo Rida,
Alyssa's shiny pants, Gondor Coles for Aid, Muscles for Tits, Arnold Rumspringer, the Demise of the Temple of Bethany's.
Alan Bergland says, Hi Mom, Rinn the No, Kitty McSull.
Raven Strom Dan's hapless novelist passenger of the dimensionally impermanent and temporally incontinent bookshop cafe, the wild-eyed prophet.
Tessa Craig, perfectly personalized disaster, Jim Turner, Lux luminos,
Javi Dinaro, Big Chunk, Gedees, Boom Boom's Wooden Leg, Will the Real Maudib please stand up?
Jilly Bean, Benjamin, not Franklin, Tracy Baby, Leah.
Is that the Chris Hancock who traded weekly soup for the use of my kitchen table?
A singular nightbird, Bethany in a green field, I am the lizard frantically firing flichet guns.
A-E-I-O-U-Y-N-W.
Bumblefay, Mr. Epsilon, The Mothman, Long-Haired Mat, DJ, Robert W, Breelzebub, Cresimira, Jessa,
The Bean Wizard!
Myth and Stitch embroidery loves the mucklewains,
Lulu Louise, Duleo, the Brew Crew family.
Bert Ruba, your most benevolent lord and master of the multiverse.
Jeffrey George, Ellie, don't tariff me, bro.
Oopsie!
Evelyn, the Wizard Mooses holds out their cat for you to pet.
Grimilar, Ginny Woboom, errant popsicle stick,
M. Horowitz, Isle of Refuge, Jack Spider's mom.
Bubblebutt Bethany has banana breath.
Lama Fresh.
Jare the Benevolent Destroyer, Valtiel Heller,
Sad Little Earth Monkey, Revin the Red Beard Wizard, Bert Bert and the Funky Bunch,
High Viscosity, Gender Fluid Slime.
Bethany II, Electric Bugaloo, Welcome to the Kwan Pound.
Pen, pen, pen, pen, pen, pen, pen, pen.
Mr. Mucacho, Kaiser Schnitzel, has successfully recruited Sarah Murphy's cats for the
Trouble Puffs Fight Club.
The Wolves in the Deep Freeze say, awo!
Julie Hammond, Sanctuary Moon's number two fans,
Insane Clown Posse, Alice Lewis, Simply Amy Sue.
pushed her because Joe said so. Even older Liz. McBearcat. Grak pinfeather,
Siddican druidic scientist. Astro, your friendly neighborhood, android,
Moonlight Zombie Fox, Old Doc Recy, the Midnight Missionary, Out There Somewhere Looking for
You. Rotten Ronnie sleeps in Grandma panties. Artist Dragonborn, Bigby Garage, Bill Zangana Lester,
Joaquin Jimenez, Big MF Juice, the SIP, muffins, spacewives are officially Verge and Diedra.
Chad Hatter, Cosmic Tea Maker of the Triads.
Captain Jack Harkness wants Peter the Robot.
Tell your cat, I said.
Upspspspspspsps, psh pips.
Banana Manaz, a corgi cold kibble,
Cudley Crackin, Sarge the Bard,
Seminity, L.L. Cool Mint Jams.
Travis Roberta, the other original Caitlin,
Ken Daddy.
In Zanadu did Kubla Khan a stately pleasure dome decree.
Leah Izadi, Milly was taken,
Dead to Me 86, B. Camp,
Shan Man, Man, Man,
Karma Karma Camillion. Kinran says hello. Zoe and her army of mice. Breyer Longlost.
Daniel. Sammy the baby seal. Trixie Belle Dubois. Dr. Budiologist, the glutes doctor.
The real housewives of Hood's Pocket. Thank you for pressing too. Your Anglophone Emotional Support Canadian
request will be processed in the order in which it was received. Queen Sirley Jess.
R. IP Lance McLean, you would have loved Midnight Burger. Adam Toclove. Dr. Bichraft. Sassy Cat the Space Vixen.
Claire Rock, Jekka, arrows to God, the size two fish you've been looking for, Iokai, Borgia,
spiders are cuddly, the main immortal pinball sounds in the diner, chill, kneel, Sin City,
Scuba Steve, Polywag, Michaela White, Elena Pickle, Wilbur Winklewryte, wristwatch wrangler of West Worcestershire,
riding through the desert on a horse name Poteu! Professor Thaddeus Snookums the 8th, Mr.
Grin, Glenn Petrovsky. This moment of silence so Joe can catch us,
breath is brought to you by Rick Tyler.
Elizabeth Hammond. Cheapcon,
the real cheap con, coming to you from the frozen
Midwest wastelands, except no imitations.
Steam Vision, conductor of the
interdimensional time-spanning hype train,
Dave Harold, Wisecube,
Bromine, pronounced bro, mine,
Main Hamdinga. Mother of Pearl,
Fiona now owns Laf's 18-inch
Peter, Sealface, Rigor Mortus,
Megan's Things, Things Megan Makes.
Coilane, Trebex Reject,
Prophet of the God of the Mucklewains,
Darth Ox, Michelle Kay, Aaron Arnold, Boyo-Yo yo-Yo-Yo-Yo-Yo-Yo-yo-yo-yo-y, as in Boingy.
Mamamander, B. Raz and Slunkmaster J. Alpacalyips. Spokane, doesn't suck.
Elliot Paints. Undead Akira. The Lord Reverend. Ryan.
Thomas' 10 Tenebristan Staphyl-Tippers treacherously tantamount to telling totalitarian trope
Termination tales. The Lovely Laura Lovely. Kith Gamgee, Sam Wise's Flamen Cousin.
DariL. Jeremy the ruler. Gochi. Charles R.
Robert Darwin III, Esquire, Ph.D. Jacob Mitchell, Zeke in the Box, Stevie Crowhill.
Ola, Milikhan of the Welcome Wagon, says, Ecabo. The Adventures of Magpie and Brown Bear.
Scrubs, Becky, just some guy from Adelaide named Ryan? Remy, the Panda Crew, Melody Prime,
Beardo the Wizard, Captain Benjamin Hawkeye Pierce, the German short hair pointer from Nashville,
wants to tell his mom Maddie that he says, woof. Whiskered, any two hands for the double
high five, Marissa the Ghost. Local snowplows in your area are dying to meet you.
Rutherford B. Chesterfield and his dapper companion Winchester. Cheshire Corgi, Stray Cat,
old Kelsey No Shoes, Zoldia, Dizzy Flame, We Serve Everyone eventually, Sasha.
Beth and Alan Van Gillis, Langston North, Sly Fox, aka Braer Rabbit,
Your Friendly Neighborhood Vagabond. The Constantly Lost Geographer, Timothy Aiotis,
Chance wants you to know, he cares. Wolfstark, Elliot, Hobbes DeCode,
Natalie Bartlett, Rory of Yin, Mooby the Golden Calf, Suda Satoshi, Giovanni Salinas,
Rocky G, Perry the Pirate, Aaron Elizabeth, Knaarcotics, Solomon Price, Daydream, but
Evil, Baba 485, AKA Shemelbach the Christmas Whale, Kaiju Somelier, Stella Corvis, Jesus
Garcia, JP the IT guy, Candyman Fight, John Peters, you know, the farmer, Barkley on the
Holladeck, Dapper Dad, SCP-4-9, O Magis, Raven the Dreamer, TK Turtle King, Mike M,
spaced-based lasers, Captain B and Lady G with their swabs.
Marla Madame Lotus still especially loves Finley, Mr. Steamwave.
My friend the Rhino says, be nice.
Hoop Challenge.
Me?
Me?
Dream founder.
I'm your Huckleberry.
Elizabeth T. T. Tai the Wonder Hamster and her dear darling Duke.
Grandpa Gus, boombastical Kim Licker, Coco Yumi's Broken Pony Pity Party.
Hug a muffin, Bigfoot of Doom, D.L. Annie Atkins. A bounty hunter called the Crandy Man.
Garrow. My cats say to tell you, meow. Think fast, chuckle nuts, flashbanged.
Benjamin Ortiz, Mr. Frog President. Pop Rock Quicksand. I want Finley to say my name.
Well, I guess I'll just go fuck myself then.
Mr. Squizzle, Whizzle, the horrendous apologizes for conspiring in the Bethany War.
Invites for tea are being sent now.
Abonaso, Mr. Rage, Adelor, Trans Space Dinosaur,
Spooky Spader's Storytime, William Kent, Andy,
the McJimmies from your local dimension,
Ryan Abbey, Thomas Adams, drink spiller,
Stephanie Booke, Entropy eigenbases,
Andrea Crowther, Martin Dears, Kevin Daughtry,
De Flower, Two Daddy Jazz Hands from Mouse Toots,
Dan Gentry, I hope something good happens to you today.
Yes, you.
V. Greenley, Ron Hayden, Michelle Hopper,
Jake the Cook, Josie Jones, Bootskooten Dave, Anthony Lakey, Brit Littlefair, T.U. Luther. Some days you're the
beetle, some days you're the dung. Lauren Mayer, Glenn Morris, Richard Ryan Moschelle, Michelle Myers.
Ali Upsi, not to be confused with Upsi, Fridge Pickle, Rosemary Pram, Robert Savat, Lizard Lee, Eliza Sharp,
Schingler, Daniel Stavvy, Fall of the Berlin Wallaby, Kelatia Rina, Rachel Vasquez, Luca Vecito,
Naivinchuri, the beloved yet borderline inappropriate empire,
of Dr. Thunderbutt and Lady Cristobel. Justin Wiley, Brett Zimmerman, Arrow Jones Jubal,
Xavier Killingsworth, Lane Kiffin is a ho, Mimetic Hygienist, Aaron Star-Star Joshua,
Damien and Sentinel of the Star System, Claude DeClaws, Spunky Dan, Rachel Seymour, Chis Alphridge
the Bullheaded Professor, Ed Boy, Ryan Finnelly, Jonathan K, Pearl Null, Another Monster, Petabyte
Avatar, Tugwin the Mighty, Project Octopus, Ken, Chibs 1012, Scotty Oates, Byrotron,
Happy 13th birthday, Danny.
Dance, break.
It's okay, do your day.
Spiku, the Bracken system and its home world,
Ren, simply Tony.
It will always be Finley's workhole to me,
if you know, you know.
Gabriel Castion.
Whom, what, when, where, and why is what all
thagronies say while listening to Midnight Burger.
Nico de Gairo goes great on Midnight Burgers.
A drum major and a trapeze artist
walk into Connie's bar.
Retorted. Sir party animal.
Byro the motherfucking dragon welcomes a doll.
A destroyer of snacks to Midnight Burger.
Uloy Jackal.
Ari sure you Mike Rob the Nancy Sinatra?
Court need to leave it alone if you want to live.
Must be a witch.
Cat with a K.
Miss Shan Frizzle.
My Thigroney has a first name.
Stoppinstein L. Mustachio.
Lucifer Hezekiel.
La Chihuahua Brava.
Adeline Pets.
C.C. Carousel.
Courth, the Destroyer.
Honest Puck.
Caspers' Mom's Milt.
Scout and Foxglove says the floor is lava.
Unexpectedly Blue, Red Nassie.
Kirtomsky.
Craig Armstrong, Plastic Fork,
Dulce Studios presents
Under the Truskin Sun.
Get out of my booth.
Bug.
Propagator, I hardly know her.
Sad Angry Crabman.
Chuck McFenley.
Effie and Zebulon's
Trans-Great granddaughter,
Hazel Hayes.
Velocity Girl 42.
Little Dragon and a Cauldron of bats.
Ben Carlisle.
Flat Steve's love for grand theft.
Anna Kearney.
Tater Tad assassin.
Four schnauzers of the apocalypse.
Starblaze Burnbright.
Mizuki.
spotted rhino and her hand-me-down frogs.
Red Mafia Panda, Lonely Isle, Kai Dallow headphones, Hinkle, Pikeman Stover, Foyne Stover,
Pikeman Stover's wife, Alexander the boss, Scrizels, Fwap, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty,
the Firekeeper, the end is nigh, Jeremiah the canceled, librarian Alex, Spike and Fay,
Johnny Ellen West and the Boys from the Dwarf, Speedy McSpeedy, Eli, Wolf, Brandy Gunter,
Auntie Becky is owned by five rescue cats, speckled unicorn, Jeddye,
rides again with Nova the Space Pirate, Tevin Long Blade Short Sword, Forget normal.
A damn! C.J. Johnson, a dragon sitting on its hoard of dice, Wendell Whitaker, Chumbo Wombo,
Ficich, Globbed Roulette, Andrew Fuller, Ban Mi Hung, The Soup Witch, Fettysini
Alfredo, Cowboy and Sasquatch Hunts Bethany's, Pebbles, VV, E.E. Rawlings, Megan Hayson,
Philip, Your Dad is Not Your Dad, Nick Borrow, Midnight Plummer. His Royal Highness, Mr. Hamilton
Kitty the first and accomplice Princess Penelope, the Marchioness of Mischief and Maven of Mystery.
Megan Gentry, Mr. Cherry, Our Ass is in the Jackpot, Tubby Teddy, Wayne Heiser, India Inkblot,
Sleve of Bahamut, Omie Gracie, Dalton Jenkins, Cat Holtz, Calart in the Tired Night,
The True Mega Mike, Fred and George, Lvinia, Ava Maddox Jr., Lysa Worsh, Cass Williams,
Christie, Yeat My Boy, 46 Toolshed 2, and El Marie Catastrophe, The Image Collector,
music. Definitely not Kevin. Sitting squirrel. Patricia E. Melt says in a world of slug bots, be a hugbot.
Red the gray, the silver crow, couch potato Alex, Neverchild. Dr. Nassos, interdimensional biologist.
Kiboko Dunord, Kozamine, Theodrax, Joey B. Lucas Barding got his barber to listen to Midnight
Burger. Little Debbie Cupcake. Terran says, hey, Oreos are rabbit. Sandlewood Mountain offers
peace for your soul. Wimical fuckery. Megan with an H. Hey, it's warranty lady.
Look, I've been thinking, maybe it'd be best if we, you know, saw other people for a bit.
I need more.
Patricia the Time Lord.
Kashak the Lizard Wizard casts check engine light.
Mango connoisseur.
Brady bug, the quirky jester.
The Big Moose and his wife, the little moose.
That old glory coal.
Gio Miao Ney's Cat Butler.
O'Sheen Lou.
Alex Berry.
Andrew Oakden.
Asymmetrical Exile.
Magpie Cat says everything's a bag of holding if you know how to pack.
Chiro the Space God.
Eliza Travels the Universe
Lindsay Bowen, the goddamn podcast lawyer,
Alex Spruce, Dr. D. Birdcloth,
whether, and Mrs. Dubbo-Wa-Way
Birdcloth weather, want to say hello
to the whole Spweather family.
I lost my galaxy britches in a game of
pants darts, Angry Ron, Dominus Caesar,
Dirkadub, Gloria's ex-girlfriend,
Kelly Clickspring, the Wild Thistle,
most likely Cass,
James Harlow humbly requests a custom sound effect.
Jasmine James,
Dr. Cabarant, also known as
Omni, thanks Waffle Chateau. Colorado Beekeeper, Fruitcake, Zephyr's wife has the hots for Zebulon.
Zendria! Jennifer Culkins, Midday Burger, Don Parks, Throat Goat 666, oh my God, my dad found out about my Patreon name.
Princess Leia, Fish in a Bag, September, previously observed in the pattern.
Prime Freak, Protector of the Scottish Realm, Little Lord Stevie Pie, Droid Pirate Finley and his Rubin-esque parrot,
Droid Pirate Finley and his Rubin-esque parrot. Stuck in a
Pit of Skittles, C-Squatch, Deflater Mouse, Tony Piacarski, Adrian R, The Devil from Table 12,
Javier, Crazy Thadley, Cremulus is just happy to be here, The Twisted Twigster, Real Housewives
of Seagius, Thay Queen, Upschnart, the Probability Demolition Expert, Showtime, For My Mother,
CCTX Girl 6823 waiting on the diner, Nicole Studioso.
Sign my shovel.
Kay the Flying Penguin honks at the horde of Bethany's encroaching on their nest.
Honestly, this is getting absurd.
Truck Stop Sandwich, Indigo Escargo, Love My Captain, Joe Mauma,
Wandering Biscuit, Castriff, Ames Affection for Internet Protection, Retro-M-G, NightScript,
Widget the World Watcher wearing a waistcoat and wig.
This Lana is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.
Utrud and Rose's Viking Void Vytoe, fueling the intergalactic fight against fascism.
Yeah, not sure what I'm doing. River Brown, Senior Deuce, Warped Rider, Tim Nacey, Ruben Clamzo, Turwin, Morgan Brockman, Sylvie, Friendly Neighborhood Fire Protection Engineer, Skull Bulb, Dustin Watson, Betty White 813, Randy Supreme and Queen Lancaster, Bolivar Shagnasty, The One True Cheapcon, Starscribe, Lucian Thunderstruck.
Ho-hoom, ma-mama. Glorbnar 7, now granting refugee status to victims fleeing the Bethany War.
Dozer now identifies as Roman Durge, The Other Adele, Chef Galval, Leah Hall, Sarah May.
Minsky Enterprises is excited to announce that Cone of Silence Consultants, LLC,
has been named its exclusive provider of logistics services.
Silly Willie Bubblebutt, Sierra Not From Arkansas, Ebenezer Boob, Caleb Tumiala, Jason Woods,
Arnie Arbuckle Esquired, Potion Maestro, Nebula Nell, Regulators, Mound Up,
Wandering Scholar, Cringle Over Coffee, Mad Yogi Eileen, a cat named
M. Petito Pato. Palace, Big Moe, Dominic Narwall 8. I am Annie. I live forever in every moment I've
existed. I swear to every star in the cosmos, I never forgot it was a gift. The Stone Fox,
Sylivia, Papitos, Slapower. Henry the Goose, Jennifer Baumer, Ninja Grim Reaper, Miles Nelson.
I am a bomb till I think of something else to do. Burit Words. Hot shot Huntley, Momo's Mama,
Space Mormon says what? Ivy Paisley, Toast, Sue Watts, Myrtle, Caitlin, Caitlin,
Leader of the Unicorn Revolution,
transdimensional delivery man delivering pipe across the multiverse, apparently.
Matlock, Lord of the 13th C, Mr. Trigvy, the fourth era,
printing with cats, Calaisi Del Mar, Von Vega, Dixie Dinah, 7,000 Possums,
KBS 1017, Silas Vex, Sarah Jack Sparrow Space Pony, Revibe, Debbie E, Emma,
Mr. and Mrs. Owo, Dusty Ventures, and his pilot Uzi drifted through space.
Ronnie Porter, Gloria's line cook, Eagle Rock Lobster, The Gabbiest Painter, Kudel, Firel,
Painted Oni, Kudel, Ferell, Emily with two E's, Space Man Nathan, Ramsey's Niblich the Third,
Kerklunk, Kerklunk, Whoops, Where's Myribrin, Gagarin, A Grimlin with the Munchies,
Michelle Scorakio, Genuine Jacob, Space Rooster Randy, Leopard Donut, Poofie Thang,
Mellow Nuggets, Keychain Crap, Matt-Match Mark, Stilo, Bumling Lilybee, Buffy's Daughter,
A quick pause so Joe can sip from his tiny teacup.
Hey guys, remember that time three years ago that I had a small teacup?
Panda.
Kennedy Allison Farner, the perpetually tired transgender time traveler.
Tristan Stolls, Dalen Y.
Shadow Rapture, yet another Nicole, Hank the Wonder Lama, Arcraft, Russell,
Zephyrus Wind, The Ornamental Rheasant, J. To the Lynn, Just Irregular Fox, Jeremy Imson,
What the Hell, Cineplex, and all the black people in North Carolina.
Just Rachel.
Waffles, Waffles, Waffles, Waffle.
Danger Girl, Atlas Bear, Patty the Ginger, Ava's cigarette ash, Hugh Bift it,
A, Zeus, Anaphylaxis, scab with Comtacks, the shape-shifting sad girl and her girlfriend say,
Joe, you've done it again, Pipples Skin in the Pippi Pond. Sarah Nicole, The Kells fights with the Bethany's,
Angry Leafs Laser Saw, Magnus Aerochill, Amy Perry, Christopher Kai, Source Decade, Descendant of the Sweather Catfish
Whisperer, Vagabond Mary, Randy's Amigo, Bold Mouse, Katie Mermaid and the Delinquent Duo,
Nomin, Nicole.
Victor Schauberger reincarnated as White Mountain Hillbilly Glitter Cupcake,
Max Danger's, Security Chief Shatsy, The Anx Peach, Team Michelle and Billy,
Nea Nix Reno, Frankinator, Nortle Bash, Jordan, Rwin X, Belasco,
Ryan Rosinski, average height, medium rage,
Audio Monkey, Joe, Team Hafe of Eisen, K.
In the Mysterious AZHQ, I'll grant you that we have a multiplicity of mics,
a jumble of James's, a trifecta of Tonys, one of whom still wants,
to be Laif, but sadly, no Bethany's.
Rowan, Thady of the Black and Herald of the Stars.
Ariane Can't Manage Normal.
Ryan Burnett, The Joyful Nialist, Dr. Dr. B, Zopres and the Bumble Army, growing
into my farm boots.
Super Beth becomes an RN alongside my bootstup farm friend.
Geneva Boss, Arkansason, not Arkansasoyer, brothers of the cosine, uncivil gnomes,
the Rat Queen Evelyn, Great Lunch Conversation, Captain Scott, Letty Lou.
He was a shifty one that Nick Howard.
was here, Bobby Ray Winland Jr., B-Bop, B-Dabadduwop, Warped Echoes, Slabs McTurps, Big Brother House,
this is Lord Robert O Tartis, you are live on Channel 4, please do not swear, Jeremiah Franco,
Justin, the Nick of Time, Gothic Rainbow, So He Made It, Cody McClure, McCadley, Eternal Companion,
Maxine Lazot, Jingoloss, Eris, Goddess of Nobody, Has Matilda, Ditsy Bay, Just Your Average Reese,
Kyle Church, I Am a Laif on the Wind, Static Ego, Lolly, Evan M. Dobson, Dave B,
Nabi, your friendly neighborhood pathologist, going to be lit, Captain Emerald L, Wayne Hall, Danny Mars, externally screaming,
but Bethany, I-made biscuits, Skibo, and Fuzzle MacBurnitz, Neelix Tiny Wolf, Asher the Raven,
Christina Senate is teleporting, BRB.
The Shains are not organized enough for a war, but there is a growing number of us, and it is concerning.
Definitely not an android, seriously, I'm not.
The Wandering Welshman, Whatever Tabby, Carolyn Harper, Nikolai Tolkachev, Capo the Sartorius, Z3,
D-D-T, Shy Sparrows, BLTN, the Kiwi-Duckling, Dana-Bobana, Fee-Fina, Fofana,
Monsters' Olmanac's Biggest Fan, Aubrey and her dad, Tequila Muckingbird, Swethergoose,
Dammer in the Space Goblin, Isso-Pail, Exquisite Wimsy, I am Lord Zoltan, hear me roar,
Pocket Ghost Max. Mags the Conqueror imposes economic sanctions on the N-Bethanies for the whole
Lasersaw car incident. Wes and Heather wonder if Derek Adair will join. My cat's name is Beef.
Katie Kate, get your colonoscopy, Victor Casados, Emily Schmemley, work for Elvis.
Bo-ho, go bye-bye for Jojo Pogo. That's a no-go, bro.
Cody Monster, Collided Mind, Miss Nixie, Baby Baton Lee, Charlie Roodle, Kyle Perino, A.K.,
Sid the Sloth on a Bike, Priya Gandhi, the Wandering Mermaid would like you to know that the little mermaid and the creature from the Black Lagoon are the same exact story.
Little Stevie Pie, Green Mountain Hermit Bethany.
This is two Polar Cat, broadcasting on the under signal.
Carl, the teller of dad jokes, Skylab's multidimensional, multifasic intergalactic quantum cyberverse,
Verde Sol, Galen Miller, Tess, Geriatric Youngen, Mystic Hippie, Unforcible, Local Marshag, Daniel Nitz,
Mavis Bacon's, Pyro's Calling, Joe Swasian, the Wizard's Supercalifragilistic Expialadocious,
and introducing Risi Pontiff as the 38th Doctor.
Too many Jans, says, things are bad, but we're going to win, Pamela Roselle Tierra,
Then Stina says, Thud Tweed, Enigmatic Catbird, Countess of Carbon.
Slappy the Squirrel, luminous elk, Rodeon caution, love is for the Nierds.
Taz Hernandez, Captain Crash and the surviving crew.
It's just Tyson now.
Casper needs all the hugs, but Joe needs an O2 tank.
Quote says, Joe is the writer's room.
Nasty Dog 74 needs crew for ship, brown coats okay.
Awkward Heretic, Devin 7777, Troy Aker, Mandy Kane, Northerly Kay, Lost Basson,
you know, the moon prison outside the triad.
Kim Sel, silly goose, honk, hank,
Ad Matha, Astro Unit,
Ghost Sabrewolf, The Sleepy Mystic, Sarah Joy,
Taters, precious, it's just Steve.
Rupal Atreides, mere tender creatures,
Amanda Short, Chut, Brimble,
Dydra, Mike Whiskey and Your Friend Frosty,
No Saguaro, Benbar,
stand clear of the closing doors, please,
beastly death, Sven the unlikely,
Cognito-hazard expunged,
Tadwasanossin, Virestria,
Theosus, the Thiasis,
Theologianish.
Why is my daughter so feral?
Send help.
Fernwood gal.
Nellie G.
Twinkletots.
Gemini Sky.
Phantoms' moms.
Callison.
Hornswogland, Daniel Arthur.
It's a fucking dog rapture.
Abigail Yorla-Hee-hoo.
King Humble.
We'd better ask Dave.
Windchimes for safety.
Cameron Winterborn Welsh.
Fireball XL5.
McKenzie Duna.
Code Stranger.
One betty bet.
Ha ha ha.
Matt N.
Alfie Rivenurum.
Momone Kiki.
Frelp. M. Lin. Feed me fish. J.R.R. on SFP. J. Spark. Lucid Harbor. Little Mirror
Leopard Paws. Diet night. Mars Royalty. Take 20 damage. Macy's Bandstand. Kim Bob.
Battle Pope and Bugaboo. Snorts. Morgharts. Fresh squeezed. Patrick Holt.
Hold it now. Hold it now. Hit it. Had it. Hot it. Had it. Had it. Bradley Ashby. Peter. William Dyer. Vicky Abert. Bairair.
Brad Meneer, Jane, Hannah Dale, Crystal Delightful, Gruntled, Killshot Betty and her steel-eyed bow,
Jackie Lowy, The Little Pigeon, Quentin Elizabeth Jones, Lily the Planetary Brain, crazed bear.
Dr. Ladis Trash Angel is living in the walls, because they bought a house and have walls now.
Crafty Lizard Be Quilton, Noble Barrel. Yes, my brain is weird, thank you. Bibbidi-Bobbity Boom.
Megan the Meg Young, Corey Morose, Russell Bunny, Max Savage, Jenny Wren, Apprehensive Craig, Tim Aranetta,
Bacon, Nicole Studioso, Rambo, Chaos Squatcher, Jeremy, Jeremy, Stephanie Sturges,
Kirsten, hurry up and wait, Sarah Farmer and Bella Donna first of her name,
Criddle, Twilio, Heidelberti, Tom Webster, Rashme Vincatech, McClump,
Azana the Leathersmith, Salazar the Do Mage, Hayward's finest Garin Elizondo.
To my little, you'll always be my good girl, you took a piece of my heart and left a pawprint
on my soul, till we meet again. Sir Schitzelot strikes again, damn animal. Ashton James,
Speth, Skyland, ALR, Sidewalk Jam, Tonka 2005, Cruzen B Anthony, Tricks says
Whirmp!
Tibled the First, Alley Frog, Tray the Turquoise Tortoise, Freya Titmittance, Courtney the Frogologist,
Corey and Stephanie say hello, the Fon Tucky Wrangler, Scrimbrulee, Yay, Aaron, the singing
Loon, Zuzana, Celeste Yose, I'm So Antigney Fun. I'm Ava's Evil Twin Sister, Bethany,
Katie and Noah, Hendrix The Stink, the Ambergler, Boodles, Osvaldoos Simioni, Ashley Chapel
People's, Ryan Ortega, Barbarian Bloodbath, The Diffinistration of Ted's, Corrine Sabrantha, Shadowdady,
Rubius Fuzzlebutt, K-Mack, The Something-something Detective Agency, Hyabuda, Eli-The
Enorme, Cion with Karma, The Wondrous Mathasophon, Hashtagneson, Finnigan Robert, Jesse Foster, Samira,
Mother of Cats, Flat Doug, Deary Darling, Ambient Drifting Man 80, Chris Hancock, Nicole 23,
gracefully impaired, tired pirate muffin, Steve King loves Kathy, Laura, Roman Ronan, John
Pruitt, Camel Pope, Philomena, Rebecca Trossel, Igpe Attenle, Chris from Tacoma, the real fairy
godmother, Sir Alphonse Suitperson, Knight of Hood's Pocket, polished puldrons pacing pine paths,
protecting pocket from sneaky skullduggery, Mitzi Lou, Kelsey Home. Still Casper's number one fan,
but now armed with a quantum spatula and ready to duel every Bethany in the multiverse
with breakfast wisdom. Damien the goddamn time lawyer, Matt Mosby, St. Foo, Harry Fishnuts,
astronoib, Magnos the Civil Gnome. Welcome, everybody. I'm Hydealon, and I'll be leading our
Midnight Burger emotional support group. Starlight. David Peerini, Techno Ranger Rick, Joe's Weaslaf,
Virgo Ares Infinity, Best Buds Danny and M, Charles Q. Choi, a bug named Nat, Cici writer, Hunter B,
Rudra, Death the Kid, Big Whiskey, All Cockinator. Ron was here. Magic Pony, Robert
Leverry, often wronged Dan, Jess Gioia, killer odd. Dr. Punkusher Esquire officially opens
Closet Baby Cat Speedway for the season. Creator 67, Mervate of the Dark Seas, Cosmic Shrug,
incorrigible Ross, SCRB Mark 11, Eric A. Rayborn, Maggie's Yarm, Stu, Enthonymy, Megan Mighty,
Haunt, Purple Saline, Three Legs are Perfectly Good, Drew and L.A., Anomalous Death to PSL Vandal,
Fuck ice.
Captain BLEP.
Ryan.
Evie Power.
Terry.
PJ says what?
Amelia Lucero at all.
Fear now doesn't polish the shiny melon.
Blargo, Blargo, Blargo.
The Jazz Man.
Tonight at 11.
Lorak, the Barbarianess.
Hicks Bezzy Mates.
Zealous Pragma.
Tuba Rick.
It's Just Blake.
Alice Malice reminds you to take your medication,
please.
Your health is important.
Kelly Jane Danky,
Aaron the Optimist.
Thomas Stolen,
A.K.A.
Casper from another universe. Chadney Ashra, Lucretia, Thornus Animator, Tamara Oliver, The Real Dirt
Fairy, Marissa, Ava, no not that, Ava, the one within...
Grimm, says, Trans rights, y'all.
Zacky Nat, Underwater Corvid, Spisorinkum, Snakes and Bakes, Michael Christian, Ransom,
Maroon Mycelil, Grolix and Terobang, late indeed again, Theron Pyrallus, Om Vega,
coming soon, dances with burritos, guacked and loaded. Aaron Mitchell,
Lady Kianu Misen.
Onix Rose, Jackie Wavlet, J.R. the Hiker Bear, Velocate, Al Cave,
Krusty McBeardface, Malaran, Sweet Michelle, Kara, Komi Zen, Calibri, Mel Momburg, Rogue,
Lisa Geisler.
Uh, attention, Dred Pirate Fredberger, we have run out of languages.
Please contact her office.
What the Chuck, Sonor Nasuno, Ben and Jessica, Todd Van Vorris, Nea Deruso, Piches Atoichi,
Ingi the Grack and Azula the Brave in their ever-faithful Squire Grab Thar.
Gen Extraneous, Dancing Dog Dreams, Trinkett Coralie, and Existentially Exhausted Bean.
Oh, is my mom emailing us about Brigadoon at the Pasadena Playhouse, honey?
Brigadine.
Brigadine.
At the Pasadena Playhouse.
Ficking great.
Ficking great.
I don't recall of, I don't know, I don't know exactly what vocal fry means, honestly.
It's like, it's like, oh my gosh.
It's that.
Okay.
I don't remember that part.
It's like influencer voice.
Right, okay.
See, this is the one I should have checked in on.
Did you like a favorite?
Let me just reread this for a second.
So it's in moments like these.
It's in moments like these when I'm reading the script.
And I imagine what it would be like to be F-E-to-have the husband, Zebulon, be this way about board games.
Like always be this way about games and how it drives her fucking crazy.
He's really like, it's like inherit the wind in this moment for him.
You know what I mean?
He's taking it seriously.
It is a man's life.
It's also tough because we've been watching so much porro.
and there's a whiff of David Soucher's Poro about this, just a little bit.
So I got to knock across these.
I believe in you, Zebulon.
So it's a terrible word, and I'm so sorry I put it in there.
So sorry.
Simulacrums.
Simulacrums.
He could have been talking about a vegetable spiral.
Lyser.
Blah-la-la-la-la-la.
Vegetable
Vegetable spiral
Lizer
Vegetable spiral laser
Lyser
She's getting feelings
In season five
Oh no
She cares about people
What
Oh
fucking great
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