Mike Birbiglia's Working It Out - 125. Ilana Glazer: Life Lessons from the Broad City Star

Episode Date: March 18, 2024

Mike became an instant super-fan of Ilana Glazer in 2014 when her hit series Broad City premiered on Comedy Central. This week on the podcast Mike and Ilana go deep on the origins of Broad City, Mike���s cameo on the show, honest takes on parenting, the development of Ilana’s new hour of stand-up comedy, and how *Broad City* Ilana is different from *real life* Ilana. Plus, jokes and stories about weed-induced anxiety and saying hello to strangers.Please consider donating to Out of the Closet

One of the things that's baffling to me with Broad City is it seems like at least your persona of when you smoke weed is you have a fun persona. But in my experience, when I smoke weed, I'm paranoid. I'm anxious. That's what I'm talking about in my stand-up right now is being a stoner parent. And I just can't smoke a lot anymore. Very, very little. And no, this is part of my stand standup, but I panic every time. I've never smoked weed without having a panic attack first.

Gosh. Every single time. No way. Every time you smoke. Every single time, Mike Rubiglia. That's the voice of Alana Glazer. This is such a fun episode today you know alana i've been a fan of hers since broad city uh one of my favorite comedy series of all time on comedy central she co-created with abby jacobson who was also a guest on the podcast and it's a show that actually i was

on one episode of i was it was an honor to be on an episode of that show it's a show that actually I was on one episode of. It was an honor to be on an episode of that show. It was like a dream come true. Alana stars in a new movie that she co-wrote called Babes, which she co-wrote with my buddy, Joshua Benowitz, who I've toured with a bunch over the years. It was directed by Pam Adlon. It premiered at South by Southwest. It looks amazing. Alana is doing a stand-up tour right now. I highly recommend you go see her. I am on tour as well. Next week, I will be all over Colorado. The Aspen Show is almost sold out, as well as Beaver Creek, Colorado. Almost all of Fort Collins is sold out. Denver, there's a few tickets left to the third show. And then I go to Oklahoma, everywhere in Texas, Austin, Texas, Moon Tower Comedy Festival.

We added a third and final show in Chicago at the Chicago Theater, one of the greatest theaters in the world. I'll be in Los Angeles at the Netflix is a Joke Festival in May. I'll be in Troy, New York. We added a fourth and final show in Toronto. I'll be in St. Petersburg, Florida. We rescheduled those dates, St. Petersburg and Miami Beach. I'll be in Atlanta, Charlotte, Richmond. And then we added a fourth and final show at the Warner Theater in Washington, D.C. in June. I can't wait. And then Niagara Falls, as well as Sag Harbor for four shows at the beautiful Bay Street Theater in Sag Harbor. All of this at burbiggs.com.

Sign up for the mailing list to be the first to know and to get the best seats. Just so you know, we're about to announce in the next seven days a whole bunch of fall tour dates that are brand new, and we're super excited about a bunch of new cities that I haven't been to in a long time. So join the mailing list. But today on the show we have Alana Glazer. I am such a huge fan of hers. I've known her over the years a little bit.

I was on her show. But we've never had a full long-form conversation like this before. I feel like it's a great chat. Enjoy my conversation with the great Alana Glazer. Okay, I looked it up. I was like, when did we meet? I think it was Vulture Comedy Festival 2014. I actually can't believe it's only 10 years

because I've been doing comedy for 17, 17. That makes sense. And I'm surprised it took us seven years to meet. I think we just missed each other at UCB and then I saw you, I saw your show, I saw Broad City. I had my relationship with Broad City was, oh, it's my secret favorite show.

It's my secret favorite show that nobody knows about. And then little to my surprise, I host the Vulture Festival. I think it was like the first ever one they did. And it was Billy Eichner and you and Abby. And the ovation for the two of you was madness. It was pandemonium. No, I don't remember anymore. But so when I saw, so I loved your show in that way. Like it made me like cry laughing. And then I hosted that show and people went nuts.

And I was like, oh, gotcha. Okay, this is like a mega thing. And I'm just curious, like, was there a moment where you realized this little thing, the project you and Abby put together, like, was a thing? When I knew it was big was when Amy Poehler said she would feature in our final webisode. Oh. We made 35 short films in two years. 35 short films in two years. We were jub-cessed. Yeah.

And then because we came through UCB The School, which Amy was one of the four founders of, we asked Anthony King, who had been one of our teachers, to ask her, because he had been her teacher, to forward a respectful email asking her to be in it. And she had already seen the web series and knew about us. That was it. And then when she like said she would feature in the web series, I was like, we were like, me and Abby were like, this is huge. This is huge in such a way that it's like, that was the accomplishment, you know? And then I'm even thinking about her wanting to

executive produce. You know what? It wasn't even thinking about her wanting to executive produce. You know what? It wasn't even that she wanted to. It was that we met for lunch and she came with a legal pad of notes on the webisodes. That was like another moment too where it was like, this rules. You know what I mean? Like I'm just such a comedy nerd forever, forever. It's my spirituality.

I literally do connect it to my Jewish faith. It's like so just the best. So Amy, like with her legal pad, that was it. The legal pad. We were like, oh, I mean, that's so funny. Legal pad. And then the actual like external like perception of the project feeling successful was the series order. Like just couldn't, it's just like oh my

god that's how many central agreed to make it as a series yeah and we had sold it to fx as a script the process was a year before they canned it and then comedy central had originally wanted it but it was actually a positive thing to go somewhere else not marry your high school boyfriend but to go somewhere else and then return and be like, actually, you are a good guy. And we like came back smarter and stronger to Comedy Central. And it was like, I think, a more secure and fruitful partnership that we built five seasons off of. So it really was a good thing. But anyway, that was just nuts.

A season, the first season. You know, even the, it was just shocking. And like so weird in life. Like you have, you have a daughter. I have a daughter. You have no idea what it actually, the actual personal private experience is going to feel like. And we had no idea what we were in for. What was the moment where you were just like, yeah, we're just going to make our own thing.

We kept getting rejected from getting on Herald teams at UCB. And then you were just like, we know we're funny. Yeah. And I was like always kind of half into it because I was doing sketch and stand-up at the same time too. And I was never that good at improv when I did it. I haven't done it in so long. So I wasn't like so committed.

But Abby had like gone to school for acting and then pivoted to improv. So it was like a, that was, she was, I think, more committed to that structure. But then I was kind of more quickly like, oh, fuck it. Who fucking cares? Let's make our own thing. But Abby had like a bigger, like, yeah, let's make our own thing yeah but abby had like a bigger like yeah let's make our own thing and i think the combo of like a chill let's make our own thing and like really um fired up version of it was like such a great place for us and we just took it so seriously we made 35 tour films in two years

yeah we were really um really obsessed yeah really obsessed it's interesting it's like that's i always use on this on the show the word obsessed It's like that's – I always use on this show the word obsessed, which is like that's what I think good comedy and stand-up is. But like what are you – when you go on stage right now, like what are you obsessed with? Like what's the subject that you find yourself drawn to the most? Well, my like hour right now is quite set. I'm doing like – I'm maybe making little tweaks and then, you know, I'll look back at four shows and after a bunch of tweaks, I'm like, oh, that's actually like, we're now 10% different.

Yeah. It is continuing to change just so that I don't feel like death on stage. But right now what I'm obsessed with is enjoying being a parent. Yeah. Like the, you know, the stories I've been told about what having a kid looks and feels like. Yeah. What being a parent looks and feels like are so far from my experience. Yeah. far from my experience.

Yeah. And I'm like really, actually in contrast to like focusing on my personal private experience, I think a lot about like the white supremacist capitalist patriarchy. And, you know, that, that is meaningful to a point, but then,

okay, what about you and your life and your body? I'm asking myself all the time. Yeah. I can't figure out what the purpose of, I hate being a parent. I hate being a mom. I can't figure out what that narrative serves in this structure. I'm like, why is that the only thing I've heard about being a mom, that you're a dour, like a dour cunt. I don't know what show you're watching, but I got to tune into that. Well, you know what I mean? Where it's just like, I don't know, like, even like Marge Simpson's like, I mean, and

I love it and relate to it and whatever, her like. Oh, right, right, right. You know, and I love it and it's whatever, iconic or whatever, but I'm just like. Right. Why is that? Why has that been the thing? My wife. Why are the tropes the tropes?

Yeah, this trope in particular. Like, why is it that it sucks? Why is that the, like, thing I've heard the most? Right. I don't really get why everybody's like, my kids are annoying. I'm like, yeah, kids are high-need individuals. Yeah, kids are high-need individuals. And, like, you know, like, making a baby in your body is hard.

But I just don't really get—so anyway, I'm obsessed with, like, actually taking great joy and pleasure in my parenting experience. I love that. Because it's so different than what I've heard. What's your favorite thing about it? experience because it's so different than what I've heard. What's your favorite thing about it? Um, the, uh, how do I say this? I don't want to say the word forced, but the, um, I guess the organic need for constant presence. It's like truly why I had a kid. I didn't do it for her, certainly. But I was, like, I really want this experience of being present. Yeah. I think that's actually why, like, she's two years and seven months.

I think at this point that's why I'm, like, now finally getting it about taking pleasure in the moment to moment, which is still a practice for me after being so anxious for so many years and living in the future or whatever yeah but um i love that that it's just like it just feels like there's nothing else going on it feels like like um you know just like when you're young and stoned and with your friends and you're like man there's nothing else going on anywhere else in the world yeah and kind of that feeling of comedy and being part of a scene like just feeling like just so the scope being so um limited to like pretty much your bodily experience do you have like anything where you're because i have a ton of stuff like this but like where you're trying to parent in a different way from your parents and the way that you're, because I have a ton of stuff like this, but like where you're trying to parent in a different way from your parents and the way that you're trying to parent similarly to your parents. How do you try to parent similarly to your parents?

Well, my mom is just, I always say to Una, like, you know, I just want you to know that like mom and I like unconditionally love you and it's really important that you know that and I tell her it a lot I love it and that's and that's like what my mom was like oh so sweet when I was growing up and and she didn't she didn't say that but we felt it you know what I mean like she was just deeply kind and you say it too and I say it yeah and I think that's and that's and that's the way I'm different. Mm-hmm. Is I vocalize it a little bit more so that it's clear. So, I don't know.

That's sort of my version of it. And on the other side, like, I don't shout. Mm-hmm. There was a lot of shouting in my childhood. Do you have siblings? Yeah, I'm youngest of four. Oh, fuck. Yeah. How many boys and? Yeah, I'm youngest of four. Oh, fuck. Yeah.

How many boys and girls? Not to be so 50s. Sorry. So it would go like, so it's me and then my brother Joe who I work with and was one of the producers

on this show and then my sister Patty and my sister Gina. Cool. Which was, yeah, it was an interesting way to grow up

because like when I, when I was a kid, when I was like five, my sisters were teenagers and it was just wild. Damn. It was wild. Teenage girls. Yeah, I know. It was wild. Did they take care of you?

Did they love it? Yeah. My sister Gina was in some ways kind of like my second mother. Yeah, that is so cool. It was wild. That's fucking cool. Where'd you grow up? Massachusetts, like suburban Massachusetts.

Oh, cool. Yeah. Oh, that's so cool where'd you grow up massachusetts like suburban massachusetts oh cool yeah oh that's so cute yeah gina and patty gina patty joe mike oh my god so what are you you're dodging the question by asking me the question but well i did really need an example at first because i was like aren't we trying to do nothing our parents didn't know but my parents were like really lovely and um i'm doing a lot like them. One thing that comes to mind is, like, my parents were so—my parents were never, like, violently gendering us. I grew up on Long Island in the 90s. And it was very—and with, like, Italians, not Jews.

I grew up with mostly Italians. And it was very, like, look at her. Oh, she's gorgeous. Look at her. Look at the dress it was like very like um weirdly jean benet like sexualizing like young girls to like again look like women or whatever so fucking weird what a bizarre instinct that was rampant and i was like wearing my brother elliot uh his like umbro shorts i was like wearing all his clothes. Yeah. And we were just like

little like queer Jews just doing our thing. Like making, like my brother's a comedian and we made comedy videos since we were kids. We were free in that way. Free in those like,

and it was like so weirdly not intentional, not a thing that my parents thought of. But my mom always thought it was gross. That was like the word. Like it's like gross the way, I don't know, like little girls like forced in tights and dresses. Yeah. I just thought that was so, my brother and I still like marvel at that instinct and the unconsciousness of it. It was so cool.

marvel at that instinct and the unconsciousness of it. It was so cool. It's such a complicated thing because I feel similarly about how culturally people will, in our extended family or friends, be like, your daughter is so beautiful. Yeah, but let's not focus on, you know what I mean? Well, you know, that's like an interesting thing. I've recently, which I didn't like hear a lot, I've recently just been saying, baby, you are so gorgeous.

You are so beautiful. And that's it. And I'll tell her she's beautiful. But what freaks me out is when people start like disembodying her and commenting on her body. Yeah. Because I'm like beautiful. It's like it feels to me cohesive from the inside out.

Yes. You are beautiful. You are just a gorgeous, shining person. But I find it so weird how people will comment on pieces of her. Yeah. As bizarre. Oh. So you worked with your brother, and then on Broad City with your brother, right?

Yeah, and Elliot. I did too. I worked with my brother since I was in college. Yeah, my brother Elliot played my brother on Broad City. He wrote on Broad City too, but my favorite was him playing my brother. It was so funny and fun. And you did comedy together as a kid. Was he older than you?

Yeah, Elliot's four years older than me. We made tons of, that was like our childhood, was like sketch videos. Yeah. And that was such a cool thing, too. I always felt bad when people's dads were dicks. Sure. You know, it sucks. And our dad was such not a dick, and he had a camera that he just let us use.

Aw. Yeah, and we just were like obsessed. And I was just like, put me in coach. I was really Elliot's muse. What's interesting, like you, like with Broad City, it feels like when I'm watching the episode about like, you got, you know, you and Abby disconnecting from technology and like going out into the world and all that stuff. It feels like it's based in a truth. Yes.

Like based in something that happened. Yeah. And then you're like, and then we're going to go nuts with this. Yeah. What was the thing that was from Broad City that, from your persona that wasn't really like you in real life? The like whole essence i mean not really but i'm like i was i was so i have been so anxious and depressed for so long and and and during broad city we're like running we were the showrunners you know just us two who were also the stars and we had we were the head writers. Like we were so stressed.

Yeah. And then, you know, we almost like curated these experiences so that we could let go and just be these shitheads. Right. But we were like so responsible, like so responsible to a fault, like hurting ourselves so responsible. And then feeling like, ugh, like imprisoned, you know. And it's like, and we had so much fun and it was a miracle. It was a miracle that the show, the show, you know what I mean? Like, just like such a miracle. And the experience was like so rich, but, you know, but also there was, my husband jokes that I like blacked out all of Broad City so that I could like be the person that I really wanted to be because she was so light, you know? I think I'm a lot heavier than her. And when you talk about, like, recycling stories or whatever, like, I'm so, I've been so focused. Broad City ended five years ago. I've been so focused on looking forward. Yeah. And, like, understanding who I am beyond Alana Wexler. Yeah. And, and in that embracing who I am like her. I mean, I am love the absurdity in any mundane situation. Yeah. I am sex forward and sex positive and fluid in my sexuality and gender. And it is important to me and to, to know that. I do like love my friends like too much at times you know

um like so much it's it's she's so based on me but i think i guess i'm speaking to the personal private experience of being like oh i crack up like this uh in the first season we were uh so nervous and i was 27 running a TV show. You know what I mean? It's unbelievable. It's bizarre and I was chain smoking in the stairwell. I'd be like, guys, I'll be right back. We're going to the bathroom. And I would chain smoke

in the stairwell and then go brush my teeth and then hand sanitize and then be like, hey guys, just take a dump. And now I'm back. What's up? Like, it was, like, so, so stressful. So looking forward and creating new stories in stand-up and in TV and movies, I, which is containing yourself, owning your feelings and your actions and your experience. You know, like that is what I'm taking.

But what actually made it into the show, I certainly don't consciously do it. But sometimes I'm like, oh, was that a joke I'm about to say? It's okay. You know, like it's fine. And it's in a new context. But I think my intention is to like keep moving forward. Right. Yeah, that makes sense.

Well, when I worked, I think I worked a day on your show as, or a few days, as Abby's high school teacher. Who's trying to fuck her. Who's trying to fuck her. We, I think, connected on bumble or like a fake bumble lap or whatever hilarious and then we go on a date and uh it's i mean i love that episode and it was so fun and you it was interesting but you and abby like i didn't feel the anxiety you're describing like i was just like this is one of the best sets I've ever been on

this is fun well for us I think it was like once we were on set we were like basketball players at the game so the adrenaline was like

woo you know what I mean it wasn't it wasn't the anxiety of like I think we should probably rewrite this over the weekend so that we can just have them ready on Monday morning.

You know, we were, like, too good of students in that way. And so, such, like, women moving through the world thinking we're in trouble and having to do more work than we're actually supposed to be doing. And then it ends up that that's fucking us. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, not having boundaries within ourselves is fucking us. But, like, on set, like, yeah we we ran such a joyous set This is called the slow round. What are people's favorite and least favorite thing about you?

Why do you call it the slow round? Because it's like, you know in shows there's like the speed round. Right, right. We'd like to slow it down. I love it. at the slow round because it's like you know in shows there's like the speed round right right we'd like to slow it down i love it as long as the answer is is how long it'll be i love it i love it what are people's favorite and least favorite things about me um like most like most favorite i'm imagining it's like the positive energy I bring which is I get that little to their knowledge like somewhat of a compulsion so so I'm like I'm like jokes on them yeah but I think that's probably it I I enjoy but then also compulsively need to um

provide encouraging energy but I think I think people enjoy that that. I think it's safe to say. I do. Okay, cool. Count it. Cool, great. And then least favorite, I'm actually like thinking about my family and not just my husband, but like my parents. Like there's like a compulsive energy that I can bring that's obsessive and anxious. I think that's it. I think when I'm like, you know what? That is it. And this is mostly for my husband.

But when I'm anxiously trying to control things but not saying what I'm feeling and what I need out of the situation but sort of trying to shape it so that it abates my anxiety, that's got to be the most annoying fucking thing. Not that I just do, but one of the most annoying things in the world. And like a tiny, tiny version of systemic oppression. It's like really annoying. You know what I mean? When people are trying to control you in ways and shape it and not just be like, we want this. Right. Will you give it to me and accept if the answer is no? And that actually relates to the thing we were talking about, like true adulthood, these like stories I'm finding myself being drawn to of like the outside perception of adulthood that we try to fill versus true adulthood, which is like owning what your

feelings are, asking for what you need, and then accepting the uncertainty that you don't control shit. So you do have to accept and then feel whatever feelings you have about not getting the thing you want. That's got to be one of my worst qualities. It's really similar to a joke that I'm working on right now, which is like I feel like I use a lot of the terminology of AA, but I've never had a drinking problem. I'm always like one day at a time.

I cannot control things that are outside of my control. And I'm like, maybe I should start drinking. I get to soak it up a little bit, get the perks. It's interesting you're saying that, though. It's this idea of you're attempting to control a thing you can't control anything that's the reality of the whole of the whole damn thing none of us are in control of anything it's all chaos all the time and it's like yeah i i agree with you which is like all you can do is state your actual intentions of what you would like to be the outcome to be and it's it gets sticky when you don't state your intentions intentions of what you would like to be the outcome to be.

And it gets sticky when you don't state your intentions. And see, this is like what I'm talking about with like, I always jump to the outside of the imperialist, white supremacist, capitalist patriarchy. As Bell Hooks puts it, she talks about the interlocking systems of oppression instead of just saying the patriarchy. So this power structure that we live in, you know why- You say it slower.

Okay. The imperialist- Got it. White supremacist- Okay. Capitalist- Okay. Patriarchy. Four things. This is a phrase bell hooks use to interlock the systems of oppression instead of just being like racism or misogyny. It's like, oh, all these things work in concert. So for example, the fucking embryos shit that just came out and abortion. Let's just talk about it.

It's like as one thing of controlling women's bodies. And, of course, it relates to racism as well. So it's a racist, misogynist desire. Why is it that this is being legislated and women's bodies are being controlled rather than just hearing from these Republicans, I want to control women's bodies. I wish I could. How much would I pay for a ticket to that show? But then why? And then the whole world, this whole power structure that I just named,

the whole power structure is designed for this thing that I'm saying I don't want to do on a personal level. They're legislating a thing that they don't want to ostensibly admit that they want to occur, which is controlling something that does not belong to them. Exactly, exactly. And how, like, weirdly, like, I don't get why people who do, like, if you said you're racist, I don't have a racist bone in my body, Trump said. And it's like, everybody knows you've always been so violently racist.

Right. Why? Right. Like, I don't get— All the way back to, like, Central Park Five. Exactly. Exactly. There's a paper trail on that one.

Yeah. Yeah, that you paid for to put in the paper. Yeah. Why? I don't—it's so weird. It's like—it's just so—it's so weird. So, can you think of a time where you're bringing compulsive excitement in an instance i'm not like a good i have like some stories i've developed in this hour that are good and but it's taken me

years to develop them but i'm not i'm not really like a storyteller where so like the way i think more is like in theme so i don't really have like the one time but what i what i am thinking of is like i compliment people and I think part of it is my desire to be complimented it's part part of it is my hope that they'll like me more but also part of it is like I I genuinely love people and love the way they present and love the things that shine about people right but all of the things are all of these things are true and i'm trying to be like okay it's it's also just like it's a lot you know like we're saying with our daughters like don't comment on their bodies like i used to comment so much on people's

looks and and everything like stop commenting on people just be with them right so that's that's a maybe i can't give you like a story of the time. I can't think of it right now. Right. Of the time that I da-da-da. But like that's an example where I'm just like, even if it's true and I hope a person feels how much I like them, they'll feel it. You don't have to say it. Chill out. Yeah. So annoying. So annoying to myself.

Do you, what's the best piece of advice anyone's given you that you used? Amy Poehler very early on said, treat yourself like your own daughter. Oh. Gold. Gold. Treat yourself like your own daughter. That's beautiful. Yeah, that like an inner child work is really coming up in people's, not in my therapy, but I'm just hearing about it a lot, people talking about it.

And she was ahead of the game on that one. Yeah. Yeah, and it was like, you know, I think I've been doing it for really doing it now, but in my 20s, I really needed to hear that. Yeah. Especially like, again, like Broad City was so magical and amazing, but also harsh. Yeah. Intense and intense responsibility, a harshness to it that it was nice to hear that like gentleness come from her. It was helpful. Yeah.

Oh, that's so sweet. What nicknames have you been given in your life that were good or bad? Ooh, Lons. Oh, that's nice. Lons is good. I love Lons. Yeah, my college. I had two friends in college, Matt Spier and John Mayer, Jonathan Mayer, not John.

Body is a Wonderland? Yeah. Lons is one of my faves. Lons is nice. Do you have bad nicknames? Are you laughing at it in advance? from the same ones anus

oh anus not because of any personal truth but elanus and then just shortened to anus oh my god Matt would be like

anus and I would be like what in a like a bar I'm like blushing it's very funny oh my gosh anus and I would be like what in a like a bar I'm like blushing it's very funny oh my gosh

anus that's a lot that's a lot of an anus I don't think I've ever heard you say anus and we've known each other only for 10 years I thought longer but it's like so nice to hear you say anus today is there

do you remember as a kid doing anything bad and getting away with it ooh the one time I did something bad anything bad and getting away with it ooh the one time I did something bad I didn't get away with it convinced my friend

to swim in her pool when her parents weren't home I'm very mad at my former self now for that for that because

it's dangerous yeah could have been with her little brother too and she got busted we were like in 8th grade and Dominic was in 6th grade or something

or 5th grade it was dangerous but we got caught. I think that's the one. Was there punishment? For Jenna, yeah. Not for me. What was the punishment?

Just my shame and guilt. Do you know what the punishment was? It was my punishment. Do you know what the punishment was? No, I don't. Okay. But I don't know. I smoked a lot of weed in like senior year, and I didn't really get caught.

One of the things that's like, that's baffling to me with Broad City is like, it seems like at least your persona of when you smoke weed is you have like a fun persona. But in my experience, when I smoke weed, I'm like paranoid. I'm anxious. That's what I'm talking about in my standup right now is like being a stoner parent and like, I just can't smoke a lot anymore. Very, very little. And no, I have a, this is part of my standup, but I panic every time. I've never smoked. I've never smoked weed without having a panic attack first. Oh my gosh. Like it's insane. Thousands and thousands of times. I have never. Like a full panic attack. Not full. Like a piece of panic.

A piece of panic, for sure. Every single time. No way. Every time you smoke. Every single time, Mike Birbiglia. Then what is the incentive? I don't know. It's like, okay, again, this is like all for my stand-up, so if you hear it another time, here it is.

But it's a practice. Okay. It's a faith. Okay. Where you have the faith to keep going. Right. And the absurdity with which once you finally get over the peak and you're like, you silly bitch. Right.

You funny bitch. You got yourself in this situation again, you dumb bitch. That's when it's like bad. And then you're like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. I don't know. It's a trip. It's just like a little experience to have with yourself. Um, but I do it so much with, so much with a lot more care and thought now.

Okay. Have you tried ayahuasca? No. Because that feels like that's, what you're describing is what my friends who try ayahuasca are describing. I mean, it's on a spectrum. Which is like making a commitment to an idea

of like, I'm going to do this enveloping thing. Well, now like I'll do like a little edibles, a little. And if, you know, if I do the right amount, it can be just like a lovely little thing or whatever. And I'm really into this weed drink. But it's got to be a little bit. Do you do mushrooms? No.

Have you ever? I mean, I did them in high school a couple times. Like partying or whatever? Yeah, and I was just like, no, this is maybe not for me. My whole thing with, this is on one of my albums, but I'm the least fun person to smoke pot with. I'm the person who's just like, do you guys hate me? Why does my heart hurt? Is that rickets?

You know what I mean? It's just not fun. Hilarious. So I just stopped doing it. Hilarious, yeah. And then even, this is a thing that I want to do when I stand up down the road, it rickets you know what I mean like it's just not fun hilarious so I just stopped doing it and then even like this is a thing that I want to do when I stand up down the road but I haven't even found the joke for it it's like Jenny and I my wife and I don't even smoke pot together because early on we went to Bonnaroo festival in Tennessee and we smoked pot and we like got lost and then

got in a fight with each other you know what I mean? It's like we've never smoked pot again. We're just like, no, you told us to go that way. You know what I mean? And we're always like, we always have these moments where we're like, we should smoke pot and then we think about what happened last time and then we don't.

Yeah, last time. That's so funny. Like 15 years ago or something. Were you performing also? Yeah. So you never did performing also? Yeah. Yeah. Oof. Yeah, so you never did it again? No. Yeah.

There's so many things like that in marriage. Yeah. You do it once, you're like, all right, we're good on that. Yeah, we did it. Check. We kind of figured out what, I feel like over the years, we've been married 15 years, been together like 20. I feel like you figure out what you fundamentally enjoy doing.

I feel like with Jenny and I, it's like we like you figure out what you fundamentally enjoy doing. Like, I feel like with Jenny and I, it's like, we like, like going to movies and plays and then like talking about them for hours. And it's like, there's no one is, there's no one's opinion of things that I want to hear more than my wife's. Like, I'd rather hear her take on a movie than Martin Scorsese. That's the best. What's the thing with your husband that you do

that's like a standby? You know what? We are like constantly doing is intending to self-actualize and doing it. We're just like really into therapy and talking about

just talking. We just talk and talk and talk. That seems good. It's lit. And we don't do much else. I think we have pretty separate social lives. And mine is like 10 times as social as his is.

Oh, he's more of an introvert. Yeah. He's like, I saw this. He's like a computational scientist. Yeah. Which I didn't even, it's so sophisticated. I didn't even know what that meant. It's like molecular modeling of proteins. Okay yeah it's like like imagine like a video game

uh where where it's like um what is it it's like i guess kind of like star wars video game at disney and you're like sitting in the seat and you're like going through asteroids and shit but the asteroids are proteins and he's like mapping out the surface of proteins to try to design drugs to dock into those proteins. And he has a like biotech startup. So he's in that world. And he's just like a really brilliant, beautiful, weird scientist. So you guys are really into like sort of going to therapy and like talking through like your relationship and your relationship with the world and all that kind of stuff. Yeah.

And now with our kid, we're having so much fun with the experience and talking about it. That's great. Yeah. It's awesome. And like also just really trying to refine it so we can be as just present and chill as possible. And my anxiety and desire to control things doesn't fuck shit up too much. Do you talk about that a lot? Yeah, constantly.

Every day. Do you ever feel judged by it? Like you ever? Yeah. And I'm like, shut up. And then I'm like, no, you're right. You're right. That was annoying.

And also the thing is like that my agita is creating agitation in the scene. It really does. What scene? In our situation. Okay. You know, of getting her to bed. My desire for her to just go to sleep, which is not how it fucking works. And it's like, well, just chill, go through the process, be present, let go of the idea of the clock, and it's just going to happen naturally.

Yeah. You know, it's like how it is. This is the material section of the show. It's half-baked things. These are from the notebook. And if you have stuff from your notebook, feel free to throw it out too. So I wrote this down and it's,

in some ways I look at this and I go like, oh, this is a premise, but it's just a funny thing. But it doesn't have a joke, which is, I was at this yoga place and the yoga teacher kept saying to me, it doesn't matter how it looks. It just matters how it feels. So she's like telling you it doesn't look too good. Yeah, yeah. Hilarious.

I look great. You're like, thank you. And she said it so many times. No, multiple times. Yeah, yeah. Oh, bitch. She kept saying it. Bitch, I get it.

I get it. Okay, okay. Oh my God, it don? Yeah, yeah. Oh, bitch. She kept saying it. Bitch, I get it. I get it. Okay, okay. Oh, my God. It don't look too good. Damn. I know. Damn. So that was like one of those.

Is this your regular yoga place? No. So when I'm touring, like I'll go, I'll look on Yelp. I'll see what is good yoga. I'll look at the photos and I'll find a place. And then like, but yeah yeah so she said that and then then I wrote it down another thing which is um at the end I thanked her for the class and she said I promise you that was as enjoyable for me as it was for you. Whoa.

And I wrote down, I know it's not in the spirit of yoga, but I thought, I don't need you to enjoy this. I don't even want you to. Jobs should be hard. That's right. I was like, maybe you should pay me if it was so fun. I think one of the tags was like, I'm feeling really inspired now. I think this should be like no money, like not a transaction between us. Nice, nice.

Do you have anything in your notebook that's sort of like a half-baked thought? In my notes app. So I haven't been working out new material. I kind of stay pretty focused on the thing. And then I just wanted to write this one thing down. Do you do like notes app or something like that? Yeah. That's funny.

My optimism is just anxiety. And we already talked about that. My optimism is just anxiety is a great line. Yeah. I love that. Oh, great. That's great. I think that's great.

Wait, can you say more about that? What does it say? My optimism is just anxiety and depression. I'm depressed about the state of the world and then have the compulsion to negate it. My optimism is my anxiety choking out my depression. I think that's great. Thank you. It's really tight, too.

I thought you were joking. You're not joking? Yeah, I'm serious. What do you mean? Like, I think that's great. I don't know. No, I think that seems really good. Oh, cool.

Well, because it's such a concise thought. And it's also like, I don't know. I just think it's like an interesting observation about the self-contradictions that are existing like constantly. Because what you're describing are like two things that seem in opposition to each other but are actually like mutually like related i have a lot of trouble with stand-up that's why i'm so shocked that i'm enjoying it so much it's like hard for me to know i think because you know i was trying everything when i was younger improv sketch and stand-up at the same time when broad city took hold i'm very confident about making a TV show and running it, you know? But like stand-up, I'm still like, you're joking.

You like it? Oh, my gosh. Like I'm still so, so it's like I literally thought you were joking. It's funny that that was recorded. Yeah. Okay, cool. Okay, cool. Thanks, Mike.

No, I love that. And like to me, I guess that's like more of like the point of something, right? But I don't have the like a bit around it. Right. Where I'm like, I would i would back into that truth well i think like what i think what you need to fill it out and a lot of times like i'll write down something like that that's like an observation or a feeling and then i'll find the example of it my life or i'll have an example in my life with the yoga thing where it's like I don't even really have the observation yet.

I just have the thing that happens. But I feel like if you paired that with an experience that's like it, that would completely become a bit because it's super relatable. Right, like something lighter and tangible. Just real, like just something real from your life that is an example of that. Or you might think about literally when you wrote that down. How did it occur to you? Right, right.

I don't know what that was. Another one is the self-checkout. So this to me feels like more a standard stand-up bit, and I'm feeling less vulnerable sharing it, just to share the emotional context around it, is self-checkout at airports. I'm training to become a cashier now. I'm not a cashier.

Pay a human being to do the job I need a human to do. I'm not a cashier. If I were, I would work here. Right. And like the truth of it certainly relates to the imperialist, white supremacist, capitalist patriarchy where it's like we're all working for free. You know what I mean? Like, listen, I can do the bottom line

about how it falls into late stage capitalism more easily than the other joke finding the personal anecdote. But what the fuck is that about? I'm checking out my Luna bar. I'm scanning the barcode of my Luna bar. I can't tell you how many times I've been at CVS and it's not scanning.

And I'm just like, should I just steal this? Would that be kinder to the, fuck the corporation, but would that be kinder to the person that I'm like, help, help, it won't scan. It's like so annoying for everybody. Why don't we just have healthcare for everybody? It's so stupid. I'm desperate for the interaction. I get in a lift. I'm like, hey, how are you today? Anything you want to tell me? I'm just like desperate for human interaction. I mean, as a baseline. But it's just, I'm not a cashier.

I was a bagger. They called us bundlers at Super Stop and Shop. Bundlers? Really cute. And I wanted to be a cashier, but they wouldn't promote me. Why? I don't know. I was like, I want to be a cashier.

And they're like, no, we're not looking for those right now. I was like, alright, cool. But I knew some cashiers. Very cool. And now like no one's a cashier. Cashiers aren't cashiers. Cashiers aren't cashiers. They're cashier assistants. Yeah.

Bundlers. But man, I'm pretty good at bundling. I'll be honest with you. I went to Whole Foods the other day with my wife and daughter and I know the heavy stuff goes on the bottom. I love. I have such a system. I know colds go with colds. Yeah, baby. Nice. Ooh, I don't really do

based on temperature, but I go to that Whole Foods too and I'm bagging my ass off. Oh, yeah. I got to write assistant. I got to write one of those things down. Oh, that's great. Cashiers aren't cashiers. They're assistants to patron cashiers. I don't know.

Something. Yeah, I think that's great. I wrote this down, which is when I was in ninth grade one day after gym class, I had forgotten my towel and the policy, it's not all boys' Catholic school in Massachusetts. The policy was that the gym teacher would hand you paper towels one

by one if you forgot your towel. I'm dying. So this happened. You wiped your body with paper towels that a gym teacher handed to you. Yeah, just this manling me paper towels. Ooh, I'm scared. Yeah, like their policy was like as though you were a prisoner of war. That was their gym towel policy.

Like, yeah. And then the joke I wrote down is, well, I never forgot my towel again, so maybe it worked. I'm also like, to the point of like, I never forgot my towel again, they are making the legacy of Catholic schools and Catholic churches knock on your door. That's funny. That is so inappropriate. That's funny. That is so inappropriate. It's shocking. It should be that another student hands you paper towels, not an adult.

But even that is mad. I mean, that's madness too. Another student would be also mad. You just have towels. Just have towels. Oh my God, laughing like my fucking dad or great uncle Harry. I'm like, that's so gross. Have towels. Oh my God, laughing like my fucking dad or great uncle Harry. I'm like, that's so gross. Have towels.

Yeah, and then I have this. Gross, Mike. Okay, so then I have this. I realized recently that I say hi to pretty much everyone in life. Yes, I love it. Unless I realize that my physical presence might be threatening to that person. So if it's like a child or a small woman. So the other day I went to say hi to a person and I like mid-high realized it was a small woman.

And so I just go, hi. Like I whispered it and then I looked at the ground and then I realized that's worse. You know what I mean? I feel like the degree to which I'm attempting to have social interactions go okay is jarring my own social interactions yes for sure your awareness of it you're so aware you're unaware okay wait just a pitch is that like that joke could go somewhere where who you thought you might be threatening to like hurts you

what do you mean by that this is like too contrived and made up but like you know imagine a scenario in which um you didn't say hi to a kid but then they mugged you that's funny you know i mean you think you're so fucking hulking right and then they're like stronger than you or a small woman or whatever no absolutely yeah just a pitch oh my gosh yeah gosh. Yeah, no, I love that. I call that the high whisper fadeaway. High. The fadeaway.

High. So terrifying. Yeah. High. Yeah, that's funny also is that you seem more like you're about to put her in your car. Yeah, I know you're right. You should have just said high. Oh, my God, that's exactly what it is.

Yeah, yeah. I seem more like I'm about to put her in my car. I should have just said hi. Oh my God, that's exactly what it is. Yeah, yeah. I seem more like I'm about to put her in my car. I should have just said hi. Hi. Do you say hi to people, strangers? Constantly. You do, yeah. Fully constant.

That's interesting. I think it's so New York, actually. To say hi. Yeah. Hey. Hey. You know, just constant. Yeah.

Do you have one last one? Let me see. do you have one last one let me see this is really sex forward but a joke about um when i'm not gonna look at you while i say it giving head is getting head okay because it like stops me from thinking and it's like um i'm getting head oh i like that it's clearing my head i like that. It's clearing my head. I like that. Cool. But I think there'd have to be more to it, but I like the premise. Yeah, it's funny if it's like I'm like, eh. The premise of it is like, it's almost like a Buddhist sex thought. You know what I mean? That's funny that it's Buddhist.

It's like a saying. So Buddhist. That's so funny. Well, it is. It's like an oral sex Buddhist saying or something. I have the note for it, actually. Now that I've broken the seal, I can tell you the note of it. Okay.

When I'm giving head, I'm getting head. It shuts me the fuck up, which I appreciate. It shuts up my thoughts only when I love the person. Plenty of BJs where I'm making a grocery list. Oh my gosh. It's like, I'm going to do a sex scene now. And in order to be able to conclude said sex scene, I'll just finish this up. But if I love the person, giving head is getting head. Oh, I love that. Yeah. Maybe there's a sweet twist. Well, I think also like you could go into the grocery list. You could be like puffins, mangoes.

You know what I mean? There's something to the specificity of the grocery list. Yeah, yeah. Puffins is hilarious. The last thing we do is working out for a cause. And if there's a nonprofit that you like, I know you work with a lot of nonprofits. Yeah. We'll contribute to them.

We'll link to them in the show notes and encourage listeners to contribute as well. Oh, you know what I love is Out of the Closet. Out of the Closet. Do you know Out of the Closet on Atlantic? They like take, it's kind of like Housing Works. Oh, great. Where they, you know, will take stuff, but also take donations and they provide with, with like clothing that they sell, you can like donate clothes or whatever to them. And with

clothing that they sell, they'll provide healthcare for the queer community, and specifically, I think, HIV and AIDS testing. That's fantastic. We'll contribute to them. We will link to them in the show notes. Thank you, Alana, for coming on the show. I took so much pleasure in this conversation. I appreciate it so much.

What a joy. Thank you so much. Working it out, because it's not done. in this conversation. I appreciate it so much. What a joy. Thank you so much. Working it out because it's not done. Working it out because there's no hope. That's going to do it for another episode

of Working It Out. I love that Ilana Glazer. She's on tour right now with her movie Babes. It opens in May. You can follow her on Instagram at Ilana, I-L-A-N-A

and on TikTok at Ilana Glazer. You can watch the full video of this very interview on our YouTube channel at Mike Birbiglia. Check that out and subscribe. We are going to be posting more and more videos soon. Don't miss it. Check out Birbigs.com. Sign up for the mailing list.

Our producers are working it out, or myself along with Peter Salamone, Joseph Birbiglia, and Mabel Lewis. Associate producer, Gary Simons. Sound mix by Pran Bhandi. Supervising engineer, Kate Balinski. Special thanks to Jack Andenoff and Bleachers for their music. Their album just came out. It is so good.

I have listened to it probably six or seven times through. So darn good. Check out that new Bleachers album. Special thanks to my wife, the poet J-Hope Stein. Her book, Little Astronaut, is in bookstores now. Special thanks, as always, to my daughter, Una, who built the original radio fort made of pillows. Thanks most of all to you who are listening.

If you enjoy the show, rate and review on Apple Podcasts. Tell your friends. Tell your enemies. Maybe you went to say hi to someone on the street and you did the high fadeaway. You go, hi, hi. Don't let that person become an enemy. You can recover. Go from awkward high fadeaway to confident podcast recommendation. Hi.

Hi. You should try out this podcast called Mike Birbiglia's Working It Out thanks everybody we'll see you next time