Mike Birbiglia's Working It Out - 186. Sebastian Maniscalco: What Is He Even Doing Here?

Episode Date: September 29, 2025

This week the one and only Sebastian Maniscalco sits down with Mike for a wide ranging conversation on their parenting strengths and weaknesses, the difference in what makes them cry, and Sebastian’s early days waiting on his future co-star Robert DeNiro. Plus, Sebastian reveals if he ever acts like Sebastian offstage. Please Consider Donating To: Tag, You're It! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What are you doing? What's the trick? What's the trick to what? Do you look fit? First of all, it's very deceiving. My biceps might look larger than normal because I detached my biceps. Do you see this hole right here? What are that? So the one part of my biceps snapped off.

So when I have a sleeve on, it looks like, man, this guy's really fit. It's not. My biceps are detaching. Why did you have to do that? I didn't have to do it. It happened. They snapped off. It's not like I snapped off my biceps.

I go sit around the house and go, babe, they just snap my biceps? No. You thought it was like a cosmetic thing? Yeah, I thought. I'm. That is the voice of the great Sebastian Manascalco. So excited for this episode.

It is, I would say, a long time in the making. I've been a fan of Sebastian's for a long time. I've only met him maybe once or twice ever, and I just, I asked him to come on, and he said yes, he's doing a whole bunch of tour dates in Atlantic City, and it happened, and I think it went as well as it could possibly gone. He is, hands down, one of the biggest comedians in the world, by some metrics, the biggest comedian in the world. I think on Polestar or, you know, through touring comedians or whatever, is maybe the, I don't know, the highest grossing comedian on tour. I mean, he's massive. He is huge. And he is hilarious. He has many, many specials. He is on tour at the Wynn in Las Vegas.

He is in Durant, Oklahoma. He's in Mount Pleasant, Michigan, Windsor, Ontario. I mean, he's all over the place. We talk about a lot about starting out in comedy. We talk about performance, touring, how he's He creates jokes, very different from how I create jokes. He puts my feet to the fire on a bunch of stuff, like what note cards are on my wall, what jokes they correspond to. It's very funny dynamic, very unique dynamic for the podcast. But it's a thrilling one. I was, honestly, I was very intimidated to meet him and talk to him for an hour.

I mean, you know, he's a great comic, and I don't own that well. It's a big month on the podcast. We have a special announcement. when we've launched Working It Out Premium. And what this is, is it's an ad-free version of the podcast available exclusively through Apple Podcasts. It's $4.99 a month. What you get when you get working out premium is an ad-free version of the podcast. No ads ever.

People ask me for this a lot. So it's part of the reason we did it. Two, you get to support the show. We work out really hard on the show. Your producers and sound mixers and all these things that go into making this show for you every week. We're very proud of it. And we hope you like it. Number three, bonus content.

We will be releasing bonus content for subscribers who I've been calling secret public subscribers. We're talking about longer, more in-depth Q&A's, bonus discussions with guests, some essays that I'm going to share with just you that I'm working on, that I've been working on actually for a while that you can't find anywhere else. And so stay tuned for that. I love this conversation with Sebastian. We go deep into joke writing, how to be your. yourself on stage? What version of Sebastian is Sebastian on stage? Is he that person who he's on stage, off stage?

Kids soccer games. He and I were both waiters starting out. We talk about that. Celebrity encounters he had when he was a waiter in Los Angeles at the Four Seasons. We talk about how both of us get nervous doing other people's podcasts and why. And honestly, it's a pretty honest conversation. We even get a phone call from Pete Holmes in the middle of the, the episode. So there's a lot going on. Enjoying my conversation with the great Sebastian Manascalco.

I asked you advice over DM in May because I was going on your mom's house in Texas, Tom and Christina's podcast. And I saw your episode and I was like, he did it right? And I was nervous about it. I was like, what are you, you know? And you were just like, oh yeah, I was nervous about it. But I was, They're good talkers and it was fun and they're easy and that kind of thing. It was really helpful. But the thing you wrote to me is you go, sometimes you do these podcasts and you're not that one, but other ones and you think, what the fuck am I doing here right now? So do you have that with this podcast?

No, this is how I feel about podcasts. I generally go on these and it's like the same thing just with another person. Sure. right unless there's questions that maybe haven't come up but like you have a routine you talk about your career and I wrote this I did that I was at the just for let whatever it is and then it's like how many times you're going to talk about this shit so sometimes that's why like I feel a little bit like how many times do people want to hear me tell the same story in a different environment no I get it I mean when you get asked to do a podcast what are you going oh fuck I can't

wait to do this? What's like what's the vibe? No. Same as you. Like you went on Segura's like what were you hoping came out of that? That's a great question. You know I here's what happens when I go on something like Sigura. I

think Tom and Christina are funny and then sometimes when I go on stuff like that people in the comments are like I thought he was dead like I've been doing comedy so long I go out of people's algorithms and then they don't even know I exist anymore. And I'm like, no, no, I'm bigger than

ever, but just not with you with these other people. And so, like, weirdly, like, sometimes I'm doing it. And this is probably, in some ways like this, you're bigger than any comedian in the world. But the listeners of this might not know that. I know. So what I'm sitting over here thinking is you got people that don't know who I am. All right. Now, I got to to do so phenomenal on this thing that they're going to go I got to go to this guy's page and see what he's all about so I don't know a lot of the times how much new audiences I'm picking off these things right because you well first of all you couldn't get bigger than you are you're playing arenas for well listen I have my fan base but it's nice to like touch other people I think

my comedy is broad enough where other people should know about it you know and I don't feel like I've tapped into, you know, when I look in the audience, I feel like there should be more Asians there, more black people, more whatever, like a more diverse group of people. We don't have that here. You're not going to get that here. Here's what you're going to get. I wish you got that. What am I coming out of this?

Public radio listeners. You're going to get a lot of middle-aged women and funky glasses. you're going to get... I don't have those. Yeah, yeah, there you go. I think, like... I mean, it's a lot of people who look like me, to be honest with you.

It's a lot of 47-year-old dads in Brooklyn. Perfect. A lot of times, I look at my audience, and I just go, oh, my God. It's like a mirror. It is crazy when you look in the audience. Sometimes you're seeing yourself or people, like, it's like a family reunion almost.

Yeah. So, yes, definitely I see that. But then, but interestingly, with you, you do have a universality to your bits. Do you strive for it? No, I just think that a lot of the times, you know, and also to compliment you and your team here, you do have a structure to your podcast,

which I appreciate because a lot of these times you sit down and like, it's like, so what's going at? You know, like, I ain't good at like, you've got to ask me shit. I'm not good at like free-form conversation. that's true when you said they're like oh what bits are you working on and you know we could hash them out which i thought was really interesting because my bits aren't like written bits they're almost like i'm living my material and sometimes when i'm in the material when i'm living the material

the the story doesn't go further enough for me to get a full bit out of it yeah yeah sometimes that's a little bit difficult because like oh i wish this experience happened to me was a little bit more fruitful in the sense of comedy yes and then i have to all of a sudden i'll come up with stuff that maybe didn't happen and it doesn't yes ring true you could tell what happened and you tell what didn't happen based on the commitment and delivery 100% i have that all the time you try you try a bit where the ending is made up you can see it in the audience's eyes they know they know you know it's terrible yeah Yeah, it's terrible.

But yeah, that's one of the things I love about your bits is that it doesn't feel like the joke structure of everybody else. It doesn't feel like set up, punchline, tag, tag, tag. It just feels like the illusion of stand-up comedy. He's just talking. This is Sebastian. He's just talking. And, of course, it's not that. No, it's not.

But, yeah, it's more storytelling. I'm looking at, like, what you have here on the wall. and it's like so foreign to me. Really? Yeah. Like there's a lot that I don't have any of that. Like the joke note cards just being up there. Yeah.

Which, you know, sometimes I'm like, you see other people's process and you walk in here. And the first thing I said to myself as soon as I saw that wall was, should I be doing that? So mine is more like voice. I do like recording and then I listen to what I do on stage because a lot of of it is like on stage type of work and then I'll go and kind of review that so that's kind of my note cards but then you know guys like you who write and Seinfeld who like write you know like at notebooks and cards everywhere I feel like wow that's a totally different muscle I don't have your bits how do you work them out because you because you're playing arenas obviously

you can't go to the comedy club you go to like the store the store improv So during a week, I'll try to go maybe twice a week and like work out some stuff. So I'm generally not working them out. Like this week in Atlantic City, I have a new bit that I'm kind of toying around with. But it's not landing the way I think I should. So I'm like, oh, should I take this out? Is it not? Because I'm always equating this to like these people paid money to come to see these stuff.

And I don't think I should be giving them half polished. material but on the same sense you're a little excited because you want to you want to try it out you know and also i i agree with you i have that kind of in a sense with every show when i do a show that i feel like isn't a 10 i walk off when i'm angry at myself i'm just like what am i doing those people paid for you know what i mean yeah you go and do these shows and i don't know if you're feeling this but like my my um and i don't know if this is the business side of my brain speaking but i am looking at my shows as a commercial for the next time I come into town, right? Yeah.

I have fun doing stand-up, don't get me wrong, but there's an added pressure now. I was like, you want to do as equal to or greater than the time you previously came there. So it's a, it's hard to maintain that. It's hard to maintain, you know. That was like a piece of advice. Lewis Black gave me when I was, oh, I opened first. him like 20 years ago he goes always give the audience more than what they expected it's totally true yeah that's a good that's a good way to look at it how so you go when you go to like the store

in l.A. with a new bit you just have the idea of it you have you have the punchlines right now I went to my kid's soccer game right so I'll tell you what I saw at the soccer game yeah I knew we were in trouble so as I saw the coach he's speaking Portuguese you know it's just it's all writing it's all like there and we were in trouble

yeah so these it's just a story I came up with this is like kind of written but kind of not if you're in soccer if your team

has to wear sunscreen you're losing now that's great that didn't happen that didn't happen but i've seen that happen you know they didn't happen that day but i i've seen that happen i've never cried laughing in the show oh my god that's so funny oh my god so these are the stories yeah so it's a story i lived and then i work it out that night on stage yeah now that story is not complete yet this is one of the stories that I'm looking for an ending too yeah and I'm I'm I'm pissed at it the ending didn't happen while I was there so no that's so that is so true it is that thing where I find like

almost never do real stories happen with a beginning middle and end and you have to be like well, what would be the middle of that story? Yeah. Do you cobble things together? You go, well, this happened this day at soccer, this happened this day at soccer, this had, and that's one day? Yeah, like, I need to maybe go to a few more soccer games to come up with the ending to that. So, yeah, there is a lot of, you're pulling from different parts of your life and feeding that one story. That's why you have to live your life and you can't always be working to come up with these things.

Yeah. Like, I'm going for two and a half weeks. I'm missing not only very, I'm missing moments with my kids and my wife that I'll never get back, which also I struggle with. Like, what am I doing? Yep. What the hell am I doing in Atlantic City on a Thursday night while my daughter is doing a recital, you know? Devastating. So that's a balance of, like, how much you're going to work, how much you're going to spend with your family.

Yeah. I'm always struggling with that. Um, but yeah, that's, uh, that's what I do. I go up and I tell stories. It's not, again, it's no, that's my, that's my process. No, it's, it's the same thing for me. I, I, I, I, it's funny, I, I related to, you were talking about the thing of doing the math in your head of how old your kids are, how old you'll be. I literally had, I had that same thing in one of my specials old man in the,

pool where I did the math of my dad had a heart attack of 56, his dad had a heart attack of 56. Wow. And I realized that when I'm 56, my daughter will be 19. And it's just like, oh, fuck, I've got to figure this out. Yeah, you start thinking you want to, like, what are you, 47? Yeah. Yeah, well, I mean, you're younger than I am than as far as having kids when I'm, what,

what did you say, 59, 56? Yeah. She's going to be 19. Yeah. And I'm 56, my son's going to be 10. Yeah. Yeah. So that's a whole other thing.

Yeah. I was trying to stay alive. You look fit as hell, though. Well, I'm a huge hypochondrior. You look great. And then you talk about eating Italian food, cooking Italian food. I'm like, what are you talking about? What are you doing?

What's the trick? What's the trick to what? Do you look fit? fit first of all it's very deceiving my my biceps might look larger than normal because i i detached my biceps do you see this hole right here so the one one part of my biceps snapped off so um my gosh there's a hole there jesus so when i have a sleeve on it looks it looks like man this guy's really fit it's not my biceps are detaching so why why did you have to do that I didn't have to do it.

It happened. They snapped off. It's not like I snapped off my biceps. I was sitting around the house and go, babe, they just snap my biceps. No. You thought it was like a cosmetic thing? Yeah, I thought.

I'm, I'm. Well, people, I don't know. I saw that thing in the movie recently where someone cracked their bones to get taller. I was like, I don't know. No, no, no, no. This is just, this is having kids at 50.

lifting them up oh wow so i love that story you tell about how you went on phalan you you you forgot your oh it's terrible forgot your your jokes for 10 seconds yeah and then uh have you ever like blanked out like that i had it first time i did letterman i was you know in my 20s i did letterman and right before i went on they go do you want note cards with your jokes on i go yeah and then uh i get on completely forgot everything. I mean, I said one joke and then I completely forgot everything. I looked at the notes and realized, you know, and so I had them. But if I didn't have them, I would have been sky high. I would have had nothing. Yeah, I had them and I still, I couldn't see him. Oh. I didn't even think I needed them, you know, like, I don't know just five minutes. Yeah, I know. They were there,

but I didn't even pay attention to like, you know, if I could even see what the hell. Plus, I was going, I was like I don't know I had such a brain freeze that I never had that happen in my life I don't know what happened I shut down completely shut down I related to what you were saying so much where when you were talking about how you're backstage and you got family and friends and the publicist and all these people and you're like making them happy and you're not thinking about like oh I have to go on and perform I have that all the time like I'm I'm doing all these things and you're you forget like oh this is the job is to perform the thing but are you getting in like to a head space backstage you know i often get asked is there any preparation prior to you going on stage are you i try to i lie down you know what i do i lie next to the stage sometimes gary will be open up the show he'll be on stage and he'll look over and he'll see me lying down face up looking at the ceiling of the theater meditating so like when did that start like i think you know the first time i came across you i want to say was at the montreal comedy festival yeah where you were

correct me if i'm wrong i don't know if you remember this you were sick that rings a bell you had like a bad colt and you had to go on you think you were doing a one-man show at the time Is this familiar to you? Yeah. Where you came in and you were like really under the weather. Yeah. I think I was doing my girlfriend's boyfriend or maybe think up or jokes. You had like the Jay-Zoo Theater.

Yeah. So are you lying on the floor during that point in your career? Yeah. So this has been a thing. Yeah. Wow. I don't know. Because sometimes I see that if I walked in, let's say I came to see you do a show.

And I was backstage and I was. just hanging out and then you went to go lie on the floor and look at the ceiling and you go what the what is this guy doing like I would think you were like showing off I know and this is something so odd like I know right don't you look on the side and go okay no no I I 100% get the feeling of this guy's pretentious when he's doing his thing but also like I feel the pressure of like I got to bring it for the show, and I got to get in the headspace. So you've been doing this since you could remember? Yeah, like a decade.

Oh, okay. Yeah. And it helps. Yeah, because I think what it does is it reminds me, sometimes I do this thing where before I walk on, I do this ritual where I touch the floor, I touch the ceiling, or I reach for the ceiling, and I would go, you're going to make fun of me so hard for this. That's what these viral moments are all about. I touch the floor

I got to tell stories from the earth I get inspiration from the heavens and I bend down and up and bend down and up oh wow again you make me feel like I should be doing this stuff the cards and our own and then I have it I'm not proud of it

I'm not proud of it but it's real Whatever works. It's real? Whatever you need to say. Well, gets me out of the headspace of moments ago. I was running to Starbucks and grabbing, you know what I mean? Like, it gets me out of the world and just gets me to like, okay, this is what we're doing.

Gotcha. Because it's what, I mean, you're performing for like 10,000 people sometimes, often, right? Yeah. And then is that like performing for 10 people? Or is that like performing for 10,000 people? Um, you know, I think when you get out there and there's a large group of people, there's an energy in the room that you just don't have when there's 10 people in the room, right? So that there's that. But once you start, I feel like if I'm talking to 10,000 or 10, it's the same kind of thing. Yeah. It's like, it's not like I'm adjusting my act. I remember doing a club in New Jersey.

Hasbrook Heights, New Jersey. It's called bananas. You ever did that? He did a bunch of times. Okay, me too. Banquet Hall, stage was small. Yeah, I remember. Had bananas hanging.

Of course it did. There's a blow-up. Did you go with a blow-up? Yeah, the authentic, the blow-up banana. Yeah. Yeah. So, and that's- Hanging off the wall.

Hanging off the wall. It's like, don't bother. Yeah. You know what? I mean, we're good. I like. We're good. We're good with no literal banana.

We get it. We get it. Bananas. They wanted to make sure you left knowing the club was called bananas based on the decor. The blow-up banana cost $5. You don't need to do that. Well, it took up room, too, on the stage. Yeah.

But anyway, performing there, obviously, you can't really go over-the-top big with your movements just because it doesn't really fit. the room. Once you move it into a larger room, you've got to be a little bit more exaggerated with the movements. But that's all that really changes, though. What is it like, when you were starting out, because your style is so specific, what is, what was bombing like when you were starting out like? Well, I didn't have a lot of the components I have now to my acts where I was very, I don't know if I want to call it shy or not, maybe not comfortable, like really expressing myself on stage with personal

stories. I wasn't very animated. I was angry. It was like an angry comedian, you know. Were you really? Yeah, like my first line when I got on stage when I first started was

the week I had today. I thought that was so funny. But that was the act. Very angry. Not letting people in. on the joke so it took me a while to like find my my feet up there so it took a good i don't know eight you know eight nine years to really kind of okay now i feel comfortable being myself talking about my family my personal experiences you know just like i feel like everything is is is game up there yeah why'd you go angry when you started i think it was a mask for me i was i was kind of just

disappointed in human behavior in general and and i was like oh how i'm angry about this yeah yeah and i didn't know any other way to express it uh so i started off very angry about like what people were doing and i don't know if people were buying it because it wasn't it wasn't me it was more like a mask i was putting on because i have yet to find who i was as a comedian up there yeah i think like i think one of the appeals of your act for someone like me is like in real life I would be intimidated by you yeah I often get that I don't know when I watch you on stage being vulnerable I'm like I enjoy this distance from this guy I don't know I don't know I think I might have created that myself because I get that a lot with especially people you know my kids are eight and six we go to school

functions. A lot of people like, you know, kind of tiptoe around me because I think I'm some sort of way. I don't know if they're thinking I'm judgmental because my act seems to be, you know, observing human behavior. And it's commenting on my disappointment with this, that, and the other thing. I told my wife, I got to work on my, like, my resting face seems to be like. Yeah. Here, I'll give you a trick. You go, I tell stories from the earth. That's what I got to say. You got relaxed a little bit. You worked at the Four Seasons in Beverly Hills. What's the strangest thing you ever witnessed there? You worked there for like eight, seven years?

Yeah, seven, seven years. So I was a waiter in the Windows Lounge, which was kind of where to be as a celebrity back in 1998 through 2005 when I was there. So it was kind of like the who's who of Hollywood. Because all the press junkets were upstairs. And then they would all come down for a drink. So you saw, you know, the first day working there. I think Julia Roberts was there.

And this is a guy coming from northwest suburbs of Chicago. And next thing, you know, I'm waiting on Stallone. So it was a big, big change for me. I was like, wow, I'm in Hollywood. It was kind of my introduction to Hollywood. So any crazy, I used to wait on Sean Penn a lot, which was very intense. yeah like you know because you just the stories you heard about him yeah so you want to make sure he got everything you know you used to come in order tuna rolls three tuna rolls um

there was a big thing back then tuna rolls used to sit outside and smoke a cigarette so I felt like I was like really in the mix I waited on Al Pacino once yeah he was um it just looked disheveled um And he was eating the little almonds, and he had, like, his papers. And he was, like, talking to himself. And I was like, is this guy in character? Like, it looked like he was studying for a role, you know? And I didn't want to bother him.

I didn't want to, like, interrupt his thing. You know, Morti, Morti, Morti. I waited on De Niro, who I even told him this when I worked with him. I said, you came in. you sat down outside and you were eating the free nuts like if we're going out of style I actually got upset at him in my head that he kept like wanting more almonds I'm my man man your third refill but yeah just little like you know little anecdotes stories like that it was just a great job how did deniro react when you told him that story

you don't get much out of him I yeah I uh I I You were an Irishman, yeah. Irishman, I was with him. And then I wrote a movie, co-wrote a movie with, he played my father, called About My Father. So I did that with him for nine weeks in Alabama. And, you know, he's very kind of, you know, to himself. Great, great guy to work with to pick up, like, little acting tidbits.

Yeah. Which I picked up from him. He's always worried about, he calls it business. Like, what am I? doing in this scene other than like talking to you yeah because when you're acting it's like when you're not like doing anything it's weird you know it's like brad pitt eating a sandwich in the middle of scenes you if you notice brad pitt and almost everything he's just doing something yeah yeah yeah which i didn't really pay attention to until i started working with him but yeah he would like

you know they'd yell cut and he'd go back to his chair and open up a nobu you know like he He wasn't, like, shooting the shit, you know? He was doing business. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's got a lot going on. Yeah. When you are, when you're offstage, are you ever the character, Sebastian Manuscalco? No.

I think people expect that sometimes. Yeah. Do a meet and greet, and they're like, you're, like, kind of quiet or whatever. It'd be weird to be walking around going, what? You know, no, so I don't generally turn into that over-exaggerated form of myself when I'm talking to people. I'm presenting it in a way that's like exaggerated and, wow, you've got the rigor on. What do you think of that, guys? You know why?

You know why? Because you were early. You're the only guest to ever be early. Well, explain this. I mean, like, and it's Pete Holmes, by the way. So let's go. Hey, Pete, I'm here with Sebastian Manuscalco. really i am we're on the we're on the podcast oh what fun tell him his influence on

seinfeld is palpable what the hell does that mean it means there's a whole special after jerry became friends with sebastian where he got sebastianized it's a compliment yeah i agree with i agree with you i never i never i don't mean out of bounds I mean, it's a compliment. I get it. I'm going to have fun the way he does. Yeah. All right, buddy.

Love you. Jeez. That's it. Yeah. See ya. Yeah. You've been to Sicily. We did a pilgrimage back to Sicily.

You've been to Sicily? 13 years ago he had never went back since he left he left at 15 and he went back at 65 so 50 years and gone back and then i have never been there so we go back together father and son we're in his hometown he's showing me these things that only that i imagined because when he used to talk about sicily he goes oh i remember playing soccer and that we're at the soccer field and i'm seeing it and then he learned to play ping pong at this recreation center and we see the rec center and I'm like oh my god all this stories are coming to life yeah I'm emotional I'm crying I'm looking at him nothing nothing coming out of this guy

and I'm like nothing you know I'm sitting over here ball and and you're with your son in your hometown and I think he was numb he was in shock yeah because when he went back he went back every year after we went and then became emotional going back But I think we went to go see his old home. Yeah. And people were living there. And this is a thing in, I think, the old country where you could just ring somebody's bell and go in.

I used to live here. Yeah. Yeah. So they were, you know, welcomed us in. And I'm seeing the kitchen where my grandmother cooked the thing. And then I saw my dad's room, a small room. And then I started to think, oh, my God, like this guy lived in a box.

and he came to the United States for a better life for his family, this and that. And then, yeah, it just kind of overwhelm me with emotion. And my father was not affected by it whatsoever. Yeah, yeah. Until later. Yeah. I have never gone. I want to go because that's where my family's from, too.

I think you need to go. You'll come back with a really good perspective. And a good five minutes? Oh, yeah. Yeah, definitely had no cards out of that trip. No, I'll definitely go. All right, this is called a slow round. What are people's favorite and least favorite thing about you?

I think the favorite thing about me that I hope people would say I'm a generous guy. Mm-hmm. And the least favorite thing is I am, um, a little standoffish. Where does it come from? I've just never been the guy to open up and make friends fast. So sometimes I put like a protective shield around me. I don't want to get to know you.

Who are you jealous of? Who am I jealous of, man? I can't name a person, but I could name like a person that has this mentality. I'm jealous of people who live in the moment. Because I'm always thinking about what's in the future. And sometimes I forget to take in what's around me right now.

Yeah. What's something you believed 10 years ago that you don't believe now? I didn't think 10 years ago that kids would have such a profound effect on my life. I didn't know what I was in for with kids. You know, I didn't want to have kids early on. I just thought I was never going to be that guy. But, man, I am so glad that I did because, I mean, the joy that they bring,

I wasn't prepared for that amount of joy. When I didn't want to have kids, I'm like, I'd be a terrible dad. And then, but now that I have a child, I'm like, oh, no, no, I'm good at this. so why that's crazy how old she's 10 so 10 years old what's the grade you give yourself as a father what are we talking here i give the highest grade a plus yeah i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry no and here's why that's great look i give myself the highest grade for effort highest grade for effort and there's nothing i could try harder on it's of course i'm making mistakes we're all making mistakes we're all making mistakes we don't even

understand we'll find out in 10 20 years but for effort hey you're all in yeah how about you what grade do you give yourself um god you know i i give myself i give my give myself an a minus b plus okay the only reason i say that is because what we just talked about about like spending enough time with them at this age. Because I feel this shit's going to go by fast. Yeah. And I just hope that I'm spending enough time with them that, listen, you can't be there 24-7, right?

If you were, you probably go nuts. And it's not helping that. Yeah. So it's just finding that balance. So it'll be plus a minus. When's the time that you didn't apologize, but now you wish you did? Um, um, mm-mm. I just had this conversation with my father coming here.

And I was meaning to apologize for the exact thing he brought up. He brought up the fact that he lives in Chicago. And I've been to Chicago with my kids. But every time I've been to Chicago with my kids, it's always been for a show or whatnot. So we stay in the city. And then he comes down to the city. He stays in a hotel.

with us my kids have never been to my house growing up oh and i think that is my responsibility and i own it and i was meaning to apologize to my father for that yeah and he brought it this is on the way here yeah and he brought it up to me on the way he goes you know what i was thinking never been there with the kids and it's and my dad was waiting for like uh me to to the to, like, have an argument with him about it or make excuses about it. Yeah. But I owned it, and I think he was stunned.

Like, my dad didn't even know how to, like, he didn't even know, like, agreement was an option, you know? Like, he comes from, like, we come from a family that constantly. Argumentary. Yeah. Yeah, my family, too. My dad, I mean, it just, like, argues at fucking every turn. I don't even know how to get out of an argument.

Yeah, but I... He'll take the other side of anything. Yeah. That's what he was... with me, and I said, you know what, Dad, I just had this conversation with my wife a few weeks ago. It's not right, and I'm going to make it right. So I'm sorry that that happened. So I'm glad that it actually came up because it's something that we definitely have to do. Sometimes, again, you get wrapped up in this, like, work, this, and that, the other thing. And he's come to L.A.

many, many at times. It's not like we don't see my dad. It's just we haven't been back to my home, which is, some of your listeners are probably going to be, you know, what I'll fucking ready you know i think they'll be i don't think they get too mad no but i'm mad at myself that i that i that we haven't done that is there a song that makes you cry you know this this song i watched it and i cried it was uh it's called ordinary mm-hmm by alex warren i think his name is and they they paired it up with a Hulk Hogan tribute okay I was watching wrestling with my kid and at the end of the thing they did a Hulk Hogan tribute with ordinary on it right and for whatever the reason I welled up it got you with the imagery of Hogan because I grew up

with Hogan and the 80s. And here I'm watching with my son, he's dead. And then the ordinary, and then I was bawling. That's so funny. I'm very, I'm also sensitive, which people don't know. I'm like, I'm crying at movies. My wife isn't. So.

She isn't? No. It's interesting. I added this week I'm watching Gilmore Girls with my daughter. I'm crying every episode. And my wife, too. We're crying every episode of Gilmore Girls. Una, not, she's not crying.

And it is kind of emotional to watch these really good actors in these really well-written scenes play a mother and daughter. And when you have a daughter, you know, you're close with it. I don't know, it's emotional. It got me.

It's like Hogan for you. Yeah. Hogan and Gilmore Girl. That's where Sebastian and I are a little bit different from each other. All right. So these are, this is the material section of the show. This I wrote down because it reminded me a little bit of you ranting on things,

which is there are rats in our ceiling right now. And we had the pest control people come over. And the guy comes over and he's like, we're going to put poison in the ceiling. And my wife goes, I don't think we want poison in our ceiling. And it's this bizarre moment where this guy is looking at me going, what are we doing here?

Like, all I do is poison in the ceiling. That's what we do. We do drops in the ceiling. We do poison to the ceiling. And I'm just like, I have to take her side and be like, nope, no poison in the ceiling. So I'm taking this crazy stance that makes no sense. And so what I wrote down as a possible bit is I wrote, my wife has a very strict catch and release policy with animals and insects, or I should say very strict, my husband will catch and release policy with insects and animals. if I got eaten by a swarm of rats

whom I was trying to catch and release she would be upset but I believe she'd have the strength to carry on to marry a new husband who would catch and release the rats who had just eaten my body. But it is like I'm trying to break open a thing right now

about the rats in our ceiling because my wife somehow is under the delusion that like the rats are going to go away without the things that the professional rat away people have recommended yeah so she's um she's against poison or i'll give you i'll give you this maybe you could work this in because i had the same problem so we're having a kitchen remodel

so they had to break open the ceiling and they go you got uh rat droppings up there and i said uh well What are we doing? And he goes, so I'm going to bring out a rat guy. So a rat guy comes out and he goes, I found a plate up there. So I go, what the fuck? How long they've been up there that they're bringing up fucking utensils and plates and whatnot?

So if you could maybe, maybe you have a discussion with your wife going, they got a whole ecosystem up there. They moved in. This is not like they're just passing through. That's right. There's plates,

there's silverware. Well, because that's the thing about rats, though, is the experts say in hundreds of years from now, the planet very well could be rats and cockroaches. And I feel like I can imagine a scene where in the future there's rats in a circle

holding giving thanks for all the husbands who agreed with their wives when the wives said they shouldn't put poison in this you know what I mean? Yeah no I eradicate these things

yeah forget the wife just no you're right man up yeah fair and just tell your wife we're getting rid of these because if they if they stay

these things popular I mean these they'll reproduce Deuce, before you know it, they'll take over to home. So we kill? Or that's it. I mean, there's no other, what are we going to do? Hold their hands out the door? After we record the podcast, I'm going to bring you downstairs.

I'm going to have you man up with my wife. She won't be intimidated at all if I bring this intimidating stranger into her home who demands that she kill the rats. No, that seems all right, though. I feel like, no, I think you're right. I think I've got to be tougher. Yeah, you're going to lay down the law. What is, do you have any bits that are kind of half formed right now or premises?

Yeah, I have a bit about, I just got a colonoscopy three weeks ago. And I, working through the bit, it's, I can't come up with the end after the colonoscopy happens. There's a couple of jokes. in there leading up to me going under with the anesthesia, one being the fact that I also had an endoscopy, which is down the throat, which I didn't know that was going to happen. I thought everything was up the ass, and one went one way, and I didn't know I was going down the throat. Something about getting an email prior to this. Like, do you ever get emails and go watch the video so you know how the process goes? And I never watched the video. And I never watched

the videos. Yeah. And then I'm often surprised when I get there that it was in the video. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's really funny of like you get, you get an email, and it's something like we're going to put a tube down your throat. Like, I think that that's a funny. Yeah, and you don't see it.

So when they told me, open your mouth, I said, for what? And then they put like a ball gag in my mouth to keep it open. And they strapped it to my head. And again, this probably was all in the email, but as I'm sitting there with my ass open and a ball gag in my mouth, all this happens. And then I don't have a finisher. Like, I wake up and... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I think you got to think about, like, what did it feel like when you woke up?

Well, it felt like I had something up my ass and down my throat, and I had no idea that even... and happened. I mean, there was no, like, you know, I didn't walk out of there going, or I didn't like feel sore. There was no, like, residual indication that those things occurred. Those things had occurred. Yeah, yeah. The thing that you were saying about soccer earlier, is that a bit that you're doing? The soccer is a bit that I'm doing that is not completed yet. That is so damn funny. Is it that your kids both do soccer? No, my son. the soccer. And also there's an element there that I'm an older father and the younger fathers today I feel just a weak, you know, like early 30s, like a weak guy. Like what I did with my son

at the end of the game is I said, we're going to dribble the ball from the soccer field back to the car. Yeah. On the sidewalk. If it falls off the sidewalk, I want you to give me five push-ups. So that type of like mentality is very kind of. Yeah, you're the only guy doing that. no trust me you're the only guy doing that yeah i do it with swim practice it's like nobody if some parent were like you're doing five push-ups if you don't forget your towel people like you they send you to child services yeah that's what i'm saying the guy the guy looked at me like this is abuse um but i look at it as just you know i don't know it's like 80 style parenting right there's like consequence but you know what's funny is like i it's almost like you know

possibly we talk about having these bits where it's like you have a thing but then you don't have a place for it to go which happens a lot of times for comics and I feel like even like talking out that bit the rats bit with you and you're like you got to man up it's almost like I need to in the bit be like so then my friend Sebastian was like you got man up and then the joke is what my reaction is to that friend who's insane and and yours is like I'm you know soccer practice is my friend Mike says blah blah blah like that's child services kind of shit and I'm like you're insane like it's like you and I need each other as foils in our bits yeah yeah yeah because maybe we're surrounded by too many people who are like ourselves

it's what's funny about it is the contrast of people's takes on it the idea of me saying to my wife like I have to man up and we're putting fucking rat poison ceiling that's not going to fly at all yeah but I wonder if I said it if it would fly If you said it would not fly at all. We'd call the cops. Okay. I screwed. We got rats.

Last thing we do is working out for a cause. Is there a nonprofit that you like to contribute to? We will contribute to them. Well, I have my own little charity. It's called Tag Your Red. Tag Your Rat. And we support. children's education, veterans, and Alzheimer's disease.

Fantastic. So it's three things that are pretty close to my wife and I and what we feel strongly about. So we self-funded. It's not like, you know, we have a board. Can people contribute? Can I contribute? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's called Tag Your It's on my website. That's very sweet to you. We will contribute to Tag Your It. And Sebastian, thank you so much for coming. Thanks for reaching out, man. We're going to go down and explain to my way for the red poison and the traps right now. You might want to get that on video

so we could just maybe slice that in here. Working it out because it's not done. We're working it out because there's no... That's going to do it for another episode of working it out. You can follow Sebastian Manascalco on Instagram at Sebastian Comedy. You can watch the full video of this episode on our YouTube channel at Mike Barbiglia. I don't think I'm looking my best today. I'll be totally honest with you.

but you can watch it and gloat. Mike is not looking good today, but we got... Actually, it is a good one visually to watch because Sebastian physically is very funny when he acts out bits, and he had me laughing. Also, he had me laughing and crying at one point. Like, literally, I was crying, laughing at him just riffing on a random thing. So that's all on my YouTube channel.

Check up for Biggs.com to sign it for the mailing list to be the first to know about my upcoming shows. You know, our producers of working it out or myself along with Peter Salomon, Joseph Barbigley, Mabel Lewis, and Gary Simons. Sound mixed by Shib Sarin, supervising engineer Kate Balinski. Special thanks to Jack Anzenov and bleachers for that music.

Special thanks, as always, to my wife, the poet, J. Hope Stein, and our daughter, Una, who built the original radio fort made of pillows. You know, we did those jokes and poems shows recently at Joe's Pub, and we're going to be posting one soon for November. So join the mailing list to be the first to know about that. and follow me on Instagram at Burbigs.

Thanks most of all to you who are listening if you enjoy the show. Rate us and review us on Apple Podcasts and just say which one you like best. That helps people find a starting point through these 180-some-odd episodes which, by the way, are all free, no paywall.

You can be a premium subscriber, but also you can just be a regular listener who doesn't pay for anything and it's all free. Thanks most of all to you who are listening. Tell your friends, tell your enemies, Let's say you're at your child soccer game and you see the other team putting on sunscreen,

you can go over and say, hey, look, you're probably going to lose this game. I'm sorry to have to inform me. You might lose. But when you're driving home, here's something that might pick up your spirits. There's a podcast by a comedian, Mike Berbigli, it's called Working It Out.

He works out jokes and talks through premises and ideas with other comedians and creatives. That might smooth things over a little bit with those sunscreen wearing losers. everybody. We're working it out. We'll see you next time.