Mike Birbiglia's Working It Out - 200. John Mulaney: He’s Funny and Here’s Why

Episode Date: January 26, 2026

For the 200th episode of Working It Out, Mike sits down with one of his oldest friends and one of the podcast’s first ever guests, John Mulaney. The two discuss monkeys wearing space suits, old stor...ies from the road, and how John’s career changed after having kids. They work out new jokes about the time John asked Mike to go skydiving, getting yelled at by substitute teachers, and a story about an interaction with Frank Sinatra that—until Mike tells it on stage—John cannot find peace. Plus, John brings a literal buzzer into the interview so that he can hit it if he finds Mike guilty of a certain tendency. Please Consider Donating To: The Innocence Project Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is the 200th episode of working it out. I know. John Mullaney. I think the first guest and the 200th guest. So the thing with doing the podcast is I'm very, we have to talk for the audience. I know. And I'm a little, I'm not frustrated with it. Come on.
Starting point is 00:00:19 But you know how much better of a conversation we'd be having. If they weren't here. And how much just more, I mean, if we were talking. not for them. It would be a hundred thousand times funny. That is the voice of the great John Mullaney. Episode 200, everybody. It's the one we've all been waiting for, I think.
Starting point is 00:00:47 I have. Have you? John Mullaney is one of America's and the world's greatest stand-up comedians. John was one of our very first guests back in 2020. We launched this podcast as a, a short-term experiment. As if you remember, if you go back that far with this podcast, you know it was a pandemic baby.
Starting point is 00:01:12 I couldn't perform stand-up comedy. And I said, well, if I can't do stand-up comedy in person, where else could I do it? Well, let's try a podcast. And then we did the podcast and here we are. 200 episodes later. It's been a great time. I feel closer to all of you. I feel like before.
Starting point is 00:01:33 I had done a bunch of specials, and I felt like we had spent hours and hours together. And now I feel like we've spent hundreds of hours together. We're on a long road trip called Working It Out. Thank you so much. I can't thank you enough for listening to the show, subscribing on YouTube, recommending it to both friends and enemies. It means the world do us. So we never thought that we were going to do 200 episodes.
Starting point is 00:01:59 We never thought that we were going to do 100 episodes. But here we are. And we couldn't be more excited to have just one of the best comedians, funniest people, coolest people who I've ever met in my whole life. While we're on the topic, I should point out, he is on a major tour right now called Mr. Whatever. And there's two significant things I should point out. One is he's playing the Hollywood Bowl in Los Angeles, which is unbelievable,
Starting point is 00:02:31 for the Netflix as a joke festival. I am playing the Wilshire e-bell in Los Angeles. It's May 6th. It's just me and friends. It's like Mike Barbiglia working it out with friends. So I'll probably do like 20 or 30 minutes a new material. And I'll probably have some guests and we'll probably work out some new jokes and should be really fun. So get tickets on berbig's.com.
Starting point is 00:02:55 Also, I have some tour dates with John, Nick Kroll, and Fred Armisen and I are special guests on a handful of shows with John in the fall. We are the Support Act in New Hampshire, as well as Grand Rapids, Michigan. Those shows have been awesome. Because basically, like, I do 20 minutes and Fred does 20, Nikki Kroll does 20, and John does like an hour or something. It's, they're great. So if you're anywhere near those places, get tickets. Hey, one quick thing before we start, I am working on potentially a podcast where I interview listeners about extreme and unusual wedding stories. Do you have a story like, you had your wedding at a summer camp? You had an absurd place somewhere from your childhood.
Starting point is 00:03:48 Any wedding where there was unusual tension or conflict between groups of people at the wedding, those stories are always really fun. Also, if you know a wedding planner or a wedding photographer, that's a good person to submit also because they've been to possibly hundreds of weddings. But anyway, working atopod at gmail.com, we would love to hear your stories
Starting point is 00:04:14 and maybe just tell us at the most, like a paragraph about the gist of your wedding, and we might work on a series of episodes about it, and we'd love to have you be a part of it. John's hour is on fire right now. It's so good. We have a great chat today. John and I've been friends forever,
Starting point is 00:04:32 which you might know if you listen to this podcast. It's very loose, free-flowing conversation. We talk about touring together in our early days. We talk about John's comedic obsession with murder, murder, as well as monkeys, and the time he fought three teenage boys on his Netflix. talk show. Love talking to John. I think you're going to love it too. Enjoy my conversation with the great John Malaney. If we were talking not for them, it would be a hundred thousand times funny. I think because
Starting point is 00:05:11 we'd talk so much shit about people and stuff. But also, that's not wrong, you know, like, but that's what you do with your friends. No, no, no. And also, it's not wrong to the people. No, I don't think it is wrong to the people. What, like, if I've been, talking shit about you, think about that. Like, I've been thinking about you and thinking of a take to the people. To the people you're jashing. I'm not, don't be grateful, but like, think about it that way. Like, I've really thought about you. And I thought about you in a way that like, you're saying, another might not of, your family might not. I've really thought about you. And I, and you've brought me a lot of happiness. We're literally making fun out of you. You're in my life. And you're being used,
Starting point is 00:05:56 like for fun and like I was about to go and we don't hate you but that's not always true but like truly like that's it's you could you know like take
Starting point is 00:06:10 think about that you and Mike and me thought about you a lot and compared notes and egged each other on to go further and darker yeah that's flattering in its own way the other day I took Una
Starting point is 00:06:23 who's 10 now to the comedy seller for the first Really? Just New Year's Eve. It was the daytime. And it just took her in for lunch. It was me, yeah, it was me and, me and, me and, me and Jenny and Una, we went the daytime. Oh, you're in front.
Starting point is 00:06:35 We had lunch. It was nice. And, like, she met Esty and Liz. And I said, and it was special. She saw where I work, basically. And I go, I go, that's the comedy comedians table. I go, when I moved here in my 20s, the other comedians would really say mean stuff to me. and now they're pretty nice to me.
Starting point is 00:06:57 I said this is my daughter. Uh-huh. And Liz goes, to your face. That's great. That's really great. Yeah. And I liked it. Of course.
Starting point is 00:07:07 For the exact reason you're saying. Imagine. These are really interesting minds. Yeah, yeah. Really interesting people who are very discerning about what they spend their time thinking about and analyzing. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:17 You know, so many things we go, no, no, I'm not going to have a take on that. Don't have a take on that. Yeah. And then you go in, how about that, son of a bitch? You just focus in. on someone in our field, a contemporary.
Starting point is 00:07:28 Yeah. And we devote a Talmudic level of study to them. Yeah. It's a wonderful thing. Yeah. So I saw your, I took the train down to D.C. And I saw your new, what was an hour and 40 minutes. It was a little long.
Starting point is 00:07:44 Yeah, at the anthem. No, but it wasn't, I watched every second of it, completely enthralled. You were so great. What a fun show that was. Hey, I was so fun. I was honored to pop on. My God. It was one of the first.
Starting point is 00:07:55 of those things that I feel like I don't really do anymore or or but I want to start doing, which is just do something for fun. Yeah. Where it's like, this isn't my job. This is just my friend. He's doing a show. I'm going to just take the train and show up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:13 And it's not an obligation. I'm always looking for something like moonwork. Tom Shilloole's show. We were working on our stuff there, but it was like it had this other feel to it. This is a show in the 2000s in the Greenwich Village. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's funny, Michael Chase said that in this podcast last week.
Starting point is 00:08:30 He was just like, are there bar shows still? I don't mean to be elderly, but I do wonder that as well, yeah. Like, there might be, and I don't know about them. Well, that's the thing. Mabel and Gary were saying, like, there definitely are. So many. So many. That's interesting.
Starting point is 00:08:47 More than they used to be. More than they used to be. Yeah, yeah. But worse. I don't know. I don't know. Remember that Seinfeld where he goes, me and Rock are always talking about. talking about where are the next guys where we were all like 25 when that interview came out like
Starting point is 00:09:00 what we're right here where are they what yeah yeah so funny oh my god now there's now we're doing that now there's so many of them yeah one of the things i marvel at when you're on like when i meet up with you in the road is you actually fill your days with real things like i was in dc with you and you like go to museums and you like went to the supreme court a bunch of times yeah recently were they Significant cases? I went to see our mutual friend Neil Katyal argue the Trump Tariff's case. Yeah. That was the first
Starting point is 00:09:33 oral argument I've seen. I listened to them on YouTube. You can listen to the whole three-hour oral argument of any case. And you do this? Yeah, often. I mean, this is astonishing. They're great. They're very easy to follow. They're very good to listen to
Starting point is 00:09:49 for comedy in terms of like, or rather in broadcasting and communicating. Yeah. Neil, Mike, or John has about 15 seconds to get the listener. Oh, interesting. His listeners are the nine Supreme Court justices. Right.
Starting point is 00:10:06 Truly them. He's not giving a speech that he hopes the outside world likes. Right. He's got to convince two or three. He knows who those two people are. He knows who those two people are. Who could be on the fence? Who could he get?
Starting point is 00:10:18 And who could he get the right way by citing one of their mentors? Yeah. Or talking about a past decision they wrote. Yeah. and the vocabulary they like. And he's got to get them fast. It's like doing nine pieces of local material in 10 seconds.
Starting point is 00:10:34 It's amazing. When you were a kid, did you want to be a lawyer? I wanted to be a lawyer that appeared on television. You remember Jerry Spence? He was some sort of a Western type guy. He wore a cowboy hat and he wore a fringe jacket. I believe he was a criminal defense attorney, but he would appear on TV all the time.
Starting point is 00:10:50 Yeah, I liked lawyers on television. I knew I knew I. I'd like the closing argument. Yeah. I wanted to be right, self-righteous, and give long closing arguments. Well, you talk about murder so much in your act. Yeah. That it's clearly, it's clearly on your mind.
Starting point is 00:11:07 Yeah, yeah. Right? Like, there's a bunch of stuff like that. Like murder, monkeys. Is it? Monkeys? Well, like, Beppo, for example. You did stuff on your talk show.
Starting point is 00:11:20 Beppo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, we did. You're right. I think about them a lot, fair amount. I think about the monkey that went into space.
Starting point is 00:11:29 Yep. We sent a monkey into space. Right. Whose name escapes me. But, you know, we sent him up after Laika the dog. Our monkey lived,
Starting point is 00:11:41 the dog, Laika died. So they sent him up, he goes, you know, the capsule drops into the water. Yeah. The flight went fine for us.
Starting point is 00:11:51 I don't know how it was for him. Yeah. Drops into the water. We can't find the capsule for a while. So he's stuck drowning in this capsule. They finally find him. They get him, they rescue him. They bring him on.
Starting point is 00:12:02 And then they go, wait, we didn't get a photo of him in the capsule in his uniform. So this poor bastard monkey, they have to put him back. So he just... Went to space. They had to recreate the photo. And he's like, the last time I was in this,
Starting point is 00:12:16 I was drowning. And they're like, oh, you're back, you know. And then they put the helmet back. They put the helmet back on and put him back in the capsule to get a photo. which I totally agree was the right thing to do. Do you think about... You can't do that and not have a picture. Can you imagine?
Starting point is 00:12:33 NASA going, we sent a monkey into space and he's fine and he wore a little helmet and he's back and he's really good. And yes, he had a little space suit. No, we don't have a picture. Yeah, we don't have that. That was not what we're about. Yes, it was a tiny helmet. Yes, his name was on the uniform.
Starting point is 00:12:51 No. Yeah, he peeked out of the cat. With his helmet on. What do you want? We don't have a photo. I love that Beppo sketch on SNL. Yeah, that was great. That was a great one.
Starting point is 00:13:03 Whenever you host SNL, it's phenomenal. Oh, that's nice you to say. But it's, and it's, I feel like it's seminal for the show, even. Like, it's an event that you are hosting because you do a musical. And your monologues and knock out. Yeah. No, not for you, for us. Oh, that's nice to hear.
Starting point is 00:13:20 I obviously look at them as the biggest event of the year, but yeah. Right. Is it like the last like six years in a row or something? No, I hosted five times in three years. Whoa. Yeah. Like, yeah, it was five times in three years. And it's wild.
Starting point is 00:13:35 Yeah, it was wild. Do you get nervous? Yeah, I do get nervous. But I get grandly nervous, which is then hilarious. Because you go, this is no joke if you walk out there and faint. And as you're fainting, say a racial slur, like, it's over. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, this is not like, oh, no one saw it.
Starting point is 00:13:53 it's so over you can't tell yourself yeah no they did they no everybody has their bad days yeah like as you're coming to you say something racist from a dream you know that you've been having while out
Starting point is 00:14:05 there's no like um oh that's okay you know come back next week and read right it's so bad and it'll be so bad right away it's a cultural moment is there some degree where at because you're in the David or Russell movie you're in you're hosting SNL six times
Starting point is 00:14:23 Like, at any point, do you just go, well, I don't need anything else? Yeah, but I felt that way the first time I did theaters. Did you really? Yeah, I was like, this is as far as I saw this going. Yeah. Which was good and bad. That's interesting. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:39 Like people, I would venture to say millions of people look at your career and say, I want that exactly what he has. That's very interesting. I want, but I want to know. convince those people they're wrong. No, I can't. You can't, okay. I can't.
Starting point is 00:14:59 Or tell them what's challenging. Tell them what's challenging. My guy faced almost no hurdles in life that weren't self-imposed. Listen, I won the fucking lottery. I'm so fulfilled and happy. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:16 I love being a stand-up comic. The idea that some 13-year-old listens to me doing comedy. Yeah. To even meet people now in their 20s, He's being like, I grew up watching you. That would make some people feel older. I like it so much.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Yeah. Like to think that like when I was listening to albums by two famously canceled men and then Chris Rock and other people, two unmentionables. But so like to think someone's watching my specials when they're like 13 and loving him, it's crazy, let alone the fact that I get to perform in nice theaters. Right. Like let alone that I'm.
Starting point is 00:15:53 I'm really, like what people come up to me about on the street, I'm really proud of. Yeah. Like, I'm not, I didn't play salami on the white shadow or something. Nothing wrong with Tim Van Patton. But someone told me today, did you know, Tim Van Patten played salami on the white shadow? I thought that was such a funny credit.
Starting point is 00:16:12 Anyway. So. Right, so when people come up to you, they're talking about a special, they're talking about Big Mouth, that they're talking about. S&L, yeah. So it's,
Starting point is 00:16:23 I'm extremely happy. I have lots of problems. All that being said. Gratitude and self-confidence in the world of comedy is not one of my problems. I have others. All that being said. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:16:35 All that being said, what is your frustrating day? That the people, the millions of people who want your career, don't know about. What is my frustrating day? I know you don't want to say. Well, I don't mean to be Mr. Well,
Starting point is 00:16:51 adjusted. Okay, here's my example. Pitch what you think it is. I will confirm or deny it. Because I'm not trying to not. I would love to go here. I want to say it was like a screenwriter once. I was listening to talk about working with, oh, it was someone you worked with,
Starting point is 00:17:10 working with Nick Cage. Oh, yeah. And the story was like Nick Cage had won an Oscar and from leaving Las Vegas and he had been, you know, in, you know, everything. And Moonstruck, and they were with his trailer and a movie. The screenwriter was with him at his trailer and a movie. And it was like a TV commercial for Tom Cruise
Starting point is 00:17:34 in like a huge movie. And it was like Nick Cage being like, how come he gets that? Sure, sure, sure. And it's like, what's that for you? Let me think. There's definitely that. I don't mean to.
Starting point is 00:17:45 Have I thought that recently? I used to think it more. I used to be like, why aren't I on one of these shows? Right. Okay, well, let me think about it. I don't like dodging the question. I don't mean to.
Starting point is 00:18:02 Right, like you'd see the bear, let's say, not that specifically. And you'd be like, what if I was on that? And then you are. More like, I just aren't, I'm not, I sometimes go, but I sometimes go, I'm not thought of for that. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:17 But also like, I don't want to do it either, with some exceptions. Right. Well, the bear. Yeah. Yeah. But like most things, you don't want to do. I feel good about what I've turned down. And I, okay, but I'm dodging a really interesting question of what's hard. I am often frustrated with what I'm doing now.
Starting point is 00:18:46 Maybe there's a bit, oh, if I only had a bit like I did before. Oh, okay. So I have that feeling. Right. Which is a little of a drug thing, right? It's like chasing the high. Well, chasing the quality of work or being inspired by yourself. Or a drug thing.
Starting point is 00:19:01 Yeah, a famous drug guy. Dumb idiot has one lens to see everything. Yeah. So there's that. There's that. Yeah. I don't know. I will keep thinking as we talk and something will come to me.
Starting point is 00:19:20 but I guess I also had those in the past and then I had to go, you dummy, you're like, we talked about this recently. Like, you and I will sometimes have someone come to our show and go, I love that, I've watched all your specials. And this person will be a director in charge of movies we'd like to be in, right? And this guy's telling us how great we are
Starting point is 00:19:43 and never uses us, right? Yeah. Most 99% of the time, not hired by the people being, Like, I've seen all your specials. A vast majority of the times. Yeah, yeah. Because they're doing their own thing and they love your thing.
Starting point is 00:19:55 Yeah. If you walked, if you met Lou Reed on the street, you wouldn't go, do you want to join my band? That's right. Yeah. That's exactly right. Yeah. That, I went home and told Jen that you had that analogy recently. You'd be like, well, I have a band.
Starting point is 00:20:09 You could come play in it. Right. Do less than you normally do. Of course. Yeah. No, the Lou Reed example, I think, is actually kind of brilliant. If someone does something that's so specific to them. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:20 You don't think how could that be in my thing? But also they could put us in their movies a little bit. But also would we want to? You want to be up at 6 a.m. on set? Yeah, maybe. Really? You like it. You direct movies. You like it so much when you direct them, you do.
Starting point is 00:20:34 Yeah. When you worked with Nick Cage, you worked on the David Russell movies, like Nick Cage, Kristen Bale. Yeah. It's like, I feel like I'm the Chris Farley show now. I'm like, was that awesome? I'll just tell you one moment. Because I, I, it was a, it was a,
Starting point is 00:20:50 fantastic experience. I'm sure. I was standing on, I won't say too much, I won't say much of anything. I'm standing on a lawn. Okay. With several of the main stars of the movie and we're having a heated scene. Mm-hmm. And I go, oh my God, I'm in one of those David O'R Russell scenes. Yes. We all have a lot. We're all going, I love that. I was like, oh my God, I'm in one of those scenes. We're just at each other, everyone talking once. It was great. It's really, really I was in a man called auto and with Tom Hanks and it was his whole tracking shot where I drive into
Starting point is 00:21:23 the shot and the camera comes in and it's Tom Hanks and I'm fucking sky high I don't know my lines because I'm like what am I doing here? Right driving a car and there Tom Hanks? Yeah yeah yeah yeah what are I doing here? Yeah the fuck's going on. How do you feel about having to operate the car yourself? I had to on this last film. Yeah hard it's a little bit like
Starting point is 00:21:39 guys Yeah Yeah, you want me to stop at a certain moment? Okay Yeah. Never done it before. And there's people around and I could hit them?
Starting point is 00:21:49 I can't park going inward, but I'll roll you, and I understand we have limited time to get this shot. And then I have to reset the car. Right, and it's an old car. I'm like driving back in the thing. Yeah, go in reverse.
Starting point is 00:21:59 Yeah. Go in reverse. Yeah, in a car. You know that I, when I used to go to Chicago for years, I would sleep in your parents' house. Yeah, I remember that.
Starting point is 00:22:10 When you weren't even there. No, yeah, you'd go back and stay with them. Yeah, it was really pleasant. How come you liked it? I liked it because it This is so like almost weird in a friendship I liked that you grew up there
Starting point is 00:22:23 Oh interesting It was nice I was like oh this is homie This is like where John used to like Hang with his siblings and stuff Yeah And there's a bit of like You do your thing, we'll do our thing
Starting point is 00:22:34 Yeah Everyone just goes into different rooms and reads A lot Yeah that's right When you go to Chicago Like when you go to Chicago this summer We're together but apart a lot your family.
Starting point is 00:22:47 Yeah. Yeah. And now you have a whole other family, Olivia's family, which you talk about on the stage and there's a whole riot. Yeah. So that's a thing where
Starting point is 00:22:54 that's how regular ass of a day it is when I'm with nine Vietnamese people. Yeah. That taking them as a store, her aunts and uncles, mom, that only a couple days later,
Starting point is 00:23:10 someone said, what did you do Monday? And I said, I took six of her relatives to CVS to get child flip blobs for themselves. Yeah. And then they wore them to a restaurant.
Starting point is 00:23:19 And that I'll be go, oh, that's out of the ordinary a little from my life. Yeah. I love. So Olivia has a large, she's Vietnamese. Yeah. And she has a large Vietnamese family in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. That's right. Of which I am one of the significant financial contributors.
Starting point is 00:23:41 That's right. I understand that. For the first 39 years of my life, I, supported I think zero Vietnam None probably none
Starting point is 00:23:52 and now I have 10 10 or so couple takes Elle yeah yeah are you thinking that when you
Starting point is 00:24:02 are having a nice relationship with them they're in the back of their mind they're thinking I wonder Phil send me a thousand dollars there's no wonder in the back of the mind do you mean the front of their voice
Starting point is 00:24:12 the front of their voice the words coming out of their mind One of my favorite things you talk about with them. How refreshing, by the way, to be in a goddamn white family, never talk about money at all. Oh, yeah. They go, how much money you have. Right. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:26 Olivia's family says how much money you have? Yeah. I actually like that. That's great. How much money you have? I tell them they love it. They couldn't like it more. Did they say how much money they have?
Starting point is 00:24:37 Do you remember Todd Barry's joke that if he bought his parents a house, they'd have a worse house? That's a great joke. Yeah, so, you know, you have parents of some success, you know, you can't, really do anything for them. Yeah. And it brings me a great joy to help out, help and do fun things with Olivia's family. Here's what I observe about your live touring show right now. I think you're more yourself than you've ever been. Okay. I like that. In the best way. Yeah, it feels that way. Then I go, is this too, uh, is this too mean? Not about the family jokes. I mean, just in general, I go like, yeah, like, you know, there's a bit of a, or is this too nihilistic?
Starting point is 00:25:20 Am I letting the cat out of the bag? Oh, interesting. Yeah. Yeah, but I don't think so at all. I find it to be, and I think it's probably not unrelated to you being in recovery and all that stuff. And basically, I would say probably facing down feeling like, oh, this might end my career and all this kind of stuff. and then you became bigger, I think, I mean, I don't know how to track this thing. I know how to track it and yes.
Starting point is 00:25:52 So it seems a lot bigger. There's some markers and yes. It seems a lot bigger. Yeah. And so then I think in some ways, do you think that you were just going? Well, I faced what could have been the end of my career and I'm bigger. So, of course, I can talk about maybe anything. I don't know if I've articulated that because I can't talk about anything.
Starting point is 00:26:13 I don't mean I can't talk about some things. I mean, I'm not like I'll say whatever the fuck I want because I was once embarrassed and it turned out okay, you know? Right. But I think I just, I don't, I want, because I was once embarrassed. I just want my kids to be okay. I just, I mean, I just want my kids to be okay.
Starting point is 00:26:34 I just want my kids to be okay. I just want to live you to be okay. I just want my kids to be okay. Right. So like, I don't give a, like I don't care about anything. Yeah, but it's, I don't know. No, it does seem like you're comfortable with your audiences being in uncomfortable spaces. Did you find after having, though, a child that looks at you, the way your child looks at you, you're like, I don't, I need those people's total adoration and approval a little less.
Starting point is 00:27:00 Yeah. Yeah, I think that's accurate. But I still like them. A lot. A lot. In fact, I'll do shows for them. From this day forward. from this day forward
Starting point is 00:27:13 yeah it's interesting though because like even when I and therefore you break through to the better stuff I think so I don't mean like I don't care and there no I still desperately love performing but you just go like this is not this is not life or death and so I'm going to be
Starting point is 00:27:31 far better at it without these weird stakes of I'm a good I am I am of value if this goes well and I'm not if it doesn't You talk about Olivia's family, and then you're like, I'm going to do the voice. And it's like, I enjoy it. I've earned it because you support them. But it's like, it's so enjoyable to watch that. Oh, that's nice.
Starting point is 00:28:06 From you. Yeah. Because you're not one of these. You can't say anything anymore. No, I've always said whatever I want. Yeah, you say whatever you want. Always. But somehow.
Starting point is 00:28:15 And I've had no, again, other than self-imposed hurdles, almost no problems in life ever. Right. But it's sort of fun to watch that you don't, even like I said, I'm going to do a guest set on your show. Do you mind if I talk about like these three topics that are tricky and sometimes even my audience is like not okay with me being up? And you were like, yeah, I like it when people mix it up. 100%. Yeah. 100%.
Starting point is 00:28:50 Robbie's so funny She's so funny First line of her special Check it out First line of her set When she opens for me And Like
Starting point is 00:29:03 Like I'm I'll tell you Every audience is better For having been Pushed around You're not gonna say the line You're just gonna say It's a
Starting point is 00:29:14 I'm not gonna say it Right right I was trying to translate it For people watching Yeah Oh I'm not gonna say What her first line is It's a
Starting point is 00:29:20 explosive line. It's an explosive line. Okay. But it's also a greeting. So, um, but all I mean is doing shows with Robbie, I'm like, people are smart. Audiences are fun. Yeah. They get poked, they get shoved around a little. She told a 12 year old to leave. Why? She goes, the dike has to do the parenting. Get out of here. Lady, take your kid and bring him back for John. Go to the lobby. I'm serious. Get out of here. That's great. And they left. They could hear her act in the lobby, though. It was great. Yeah, Robbie's fantastic. Robbie's a quintessential example of a comedian who you're like,
Starting point is 00:29:57 oh, you just have no filter. This is just someone. I think it's just that thing of like the mind, the personality, and the creativity operating at its highest level right now, where they're all one, you know. There is a filter. There's a quality control because everything she says is funny. That's right. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:15 Right. No, it's sorry. It's the slight of hand of no filter. Right, right, right. It's like, oh my God, I guess this person is just going to say all this shit. Yeah. And they, okay. Also, it's no filter, yeah. Also, it's an inability to keep some things muddled in.
Starting point is 00:30:32 Who are the people who are the comics who make you laugh the most? You know who really makes me laugh all the time? Nick Griffin. Oh, Nick Griffin's great. I mean, every time I see him at the seller. Yeah. Jessica Carson. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:30:48 You love Cat Williams, I know. I love Cat Williams. We've talked about the Florida run that he does. The Jacksonville run he does. Jacksonville is now a term... I know. I use for the way they say like, forget it, Jake, it's Chinatown.
Starting point is 00:31:06 Jacksonville is when a bit... I don't understand what the bit is about. I don't know the facts of the bit. I don't know what you're talking about. Yes. But this is so funny. So when you see someone do a bit and you're like, I have actually no point of connection
Starting point is 00:31:20 with what you're saying. I don't know that these are true examples you're giving. The audience loves them. Yeah. I'm going to trust that this makes sense to someone. That's right. But it's so clearly funny that I'm laughing so hard. That's called Jacksonville now.
Starting point is 00:31:37 Because he does, I believe, 12? 18. Maybe it's like 18 minutes. Minutes on the city of Jacksonville to open his special. It's become a comedy. touchpoint where comedians will talk about how Cat Williams does 15 minutes at the beginning of a special about local references in Jacksonville, Florida. And it's so funny that the neighborhood sound like soap operas. And then he gives examples and they don't to me, but like, and they don't,
Starting point is 00:32:06 and I don't know if those are real. It's like, it's perfect. It's a perfectly closed system. Yeah. That is somehow you go, I know that I have total trust that this is, hilarious and therefore I'm laughing as if I know all of these. When you were a writer at S&L, what was your favorite type of person in the writer's room? James Anderson. Okay. Okay. But what type of person? Like what's the quality of a collaborator that like you were drawn to when you're at the show? Rewrite Table Fun. Oh, interesting. Very generous at Rewrite Table. The first year I was there, there were nine writers. Yeah. There's a lot more now. We were at one table on Thursdays for a rewrite.
Starting point is 00:32:46 Seth Myers, Paul LaPelle, Emily Spivey, Simon Rich, Marica Sawyer, Rob Klein, Colin Jost, James Anderson, Kent Sublette, Brian Tucker. And if I'm leaving anyone out from that one season, they're update writers as well.
Starting point is 00:33:04 And everyone's at at one table, Jim Downey occasionally, and everyone kind of cross-pollinated. I wrote with Paula, I wrote with James, Simon and Paula would write Simon, together. Everyone worked together and everyone really was quite generous with like someone giving you a joke on Thursday. I mean, what are these sketches? They're two minutes, 53 seconds. Yeah. They're often good for one.
Starting point is 00:33:29 They often get one take home joke from the whole episode. Yeah. Another writer might just give you that at the rewrite table. Yeah. It's wild. You know, we're not all these like auturs that bring our things on Wednesday and then take them back and then put them up Saturday for dress. It's like someone's going to give you the tag that's going to change. Seth Myers is just going to effortlessly give you a tag that changes the whole sketch from, you know, a car to an airplane. Um, I'm going to do the slow round unless you know what this was for. Oh yeah, what's that for now I think it's stupid. I'm not going to know. No, no, let's do it. This was originally for and what happened was I had a bell. Ding! Okay. Um, and I left it in Chicago. I flew in this morning. So I got this on Instacart
Starting point is 00:34:09 from, obviously. I don't even need to say what store that's from. It's famous. Um, famous product of theirs, Staples. If you complimented something or someone that I knew you didn't respect, I was going to hit the buzzer. Only to say,
Starting point is 00:34:27 I do it too. We both do it. Okay, but you think I do it on this show? Or if something came up, we both do it publicly. Yeah, yeah. It's not picking on you. No, I get it. You can't pick up me. I like it. If someone came up and we went, hmm,
Starting point is 00:34:44 And then you hit the button that says easy. And if you were too diplomatic, it was going to... That was easy. A little too slow, too. The timing's almost funny. It's so bad. That was easy. Yeah, I really thought it was going to have a buzzer sound.
Starting point is 00:34:58 I was very disappointed. And that's if I'm complimenting someone who I don't respect. If you drifted into something that I go, nah, we've talked about this and we know this isn't good, you know. I think sometimes we both will fall into certain polite diplomat. diplomatic platitudes. I do it as well. Okay. I respect that. But I didn't bring the bell, and the button's not, the timing of the button isn't good.
Starting point is 00:35:23 Why are you confused by the idea that we would say something polite? I'm trying to think of who I've said it about. There's people you will talk about positively that if I leaned into it, you'd say a lot more interesting stuff about them. Maybe that's what the bell is for. As would I. Right. Right. How do we market that? If you poked at it, if you poked at it. If I would be, there'd be more there.
Starting point is 00:35:47 I'm going to come on, and then you go, yeah, no, I did it. They're terrible, but I mean, this is one thing that worked out well. No, I know what you mean. How do we market that, by the way? You know what's like that? I'll take this out, but it's like, how do you market what? How do we sell what we do privately? Oh, no, unsellable.
Starting point is 00:36:05 I always thought there should be like a $10,000 a head ticket at the Montreal Comedy Festival. Midnight show, no one under the influence allowed. Yeah. So, like, you got to, that's hard for a lot of industry people at Montreal. You know, I know. $10,000 ahead, no comps. Absolutely no comp. That's interesting.
Starting point is 00:36:25 The second something leaks the show's over. Oh, that's a great idea. We would do it every year, donate the money to something really important. Right. If you leak anything said, it's over. And you're taking money out of someone's pocket, a charity. Yeah, that's smart. Yeah, I think so.
Starting point is 00:36:41 What do we call it, though? Talking shit. Talking shit. That's a great idea. I've always thought that would be the highlight of any festival. Talking shit is the most fun. Again, though, it's interesting, too. It's an interesting exercise.
Starting point is 00:37:00 We care about our goddamn craft a lot. Craft, I never said that before. We care about the biz and the other people we have to run into. We care a lot about them. We think about them a lot. What do you think when people, like, rip off your voice and your style? Dude, I've heard they do, but I don't, I can't think of anyone that does. We know who did.
Starting point is 00:37:25 I don't, actually. You want to write it down? I write the first letter. Oh, I'm not that familiar with that person. Okay. But I'll check it out. I just watched it the other day. I was like, come on.
Starting point is 00:37:43 What are we doing? That's cool, though. I guess. Of course it's cool. Okay. How'd you feel about people that ripped you off? Well, there's two or three. Do you like it?
Starting point is 00:37:55 That's fine. Yeah. It's fine. Yeah. I mean, certainly, like, yeah, I mean, look. How do you feel about the one person show thing that you started being a thing now? I feel like net positive. Yeah, I think so.
Starting point is 00:38:09 Net positive with caveats. Yeah, but sometimes people think that, there's no jokes in the shows. And I'm like, no, no, no, there's jokes. Oh, yeah. Like, someone will invite me to see the show, and I'm like, okay, this is fine, but, like, there's no jokes.
Starting point is 00:38:25 Right. So I don't, I don't know what. I mean, you can do each of those shows at Go Bananas in Cincinnati. I know, and have. Yeah, that's where I developed these things is in clubs, but yeah. Do you remember that time when,
Starting point is 00:38:38 when you start comedy and, like, you want, you almost want to seem high Yes. Yeah. Because then you're like, then they'll just think I'm this crazy person. That's right.
Starting point is 00:38:51 I remember reading, to kill a mockingbird, there's a guy, there's a white gentleman who hangs out with the African American characters in the book. And so he always has a bottle
Starting point is 00:38:59 in a paper bag so that other white southerners just think he's a drunk and don't judge him really. But they say that in the bag is soda because he's not actually drunk. Right.
Starting point is 00:39:10 Yeah. No, I think that that is... Kind of cowardly now that I think about it. But I... I just remember going like, right, you can get, you can move in the world if you're like, yeah, but that guy's a drunk, you know. No, I think that that guy's high.
Starting point is 00:39:24 That comedian's so high that he can't expect a laugh for each of these sentences. That's certainly what I thought when I was starting out was, yeah. I was really stilted. Like, I liked the way David Burton talked and stopped making sense. You know, like, anyone have any questions? Like, very, like, stilted, childlike, whatever that was. Do you remember you gave me this note once? A lot of my premises, I would say the premise, and then I'd say something and I go,
Starting point is 00:39:49 that's funny to me, and here's why. Remember I'd always say, and here's why? Here's why. And then I'd explain. You were like, you don't need here's why. Here's why I understood. That's ridiculous. And here's why.
Starting point is 00:39:59 Here's why. When you wrestled the kids. Yeah, it was hard. I was there. And you came off and you were like, you were like, Adarsh, grabbed my hand. I didn't know that was, and then I was like, oh shit, John really cares about this. Yeah. And so I don't know if people realized that it was a bit, but it was also not a bit.
Starting point is 00:40:21 No, it was not a bit in that. It was produced chaos. Yeah. Quite produced. There was a ref rules. Yeah. Language rule. I mean, really, we took off our rings and watches.
Starting point is 00:40:32 Like, it was, but then, like, no one knew what would happen, including myself. I just was like, what if everyone was like, you're so afraid of getting your ass kicked. I was like, no, I'm afraid of just like dislocating one of their collarbones in the melee of... Right. And then it's a 13-year-old. Of course. That would have been so bad, I think. Right, did you mail it in a little bit?
Starting point is 00:40:55 That would be unfair to the boys. Okay. So you did? No, there was a moment... I mean, I can say it. You can't say it. You did. There was a moment that I think I could have gone for a darsh and I didn't. I say that though, knowing the other two were on my legs. So could I have?
Starting point is 00:41:15 There was a moment where I possibly could have thrown a darsh. Okay. But a darsh, and this is interesting, right before the fight, I never talked about this. Okay. We're taking off the rings and watches. The camera moves over to Richard. He looks at me, he goes, how's the family? And I went, what the fuck do you say?
Starting point is 00:41:33 And then we got to get in the ring. Just, I was like, what do you mean? What do you mean? You know where my fucking kids live? Like, I didn't know what it meant. And it really threw it. It was really smart. How's a family?
Starting point is 00:41:45 Head games. Seriously. On the subject of, like, talking trash about people, what's the thing that you would say? Or things or show, not just people about movies or shows. About me. That, like, you tell me now, you go like, oh, yeah. I could take that as a note.
Starting point is 00:42:22 What? For real. What's the thing I would tell you? No, no, what thing you wouldn't tell me? What's the thing you'd say to Dan Levy backstage in D.C. When I'm in the other room. There's not really any, but I wouldn't tell you. Okay.
Starting point is 00:42:36 That's how the whole world stays together. I don't want to know what you've said about me. Oh, okay. So there is something, but you don't want to say it. I'm sure. I've known you for 26 years. Yeah. But nothing like, no character assassination.
Starting point is 00:42:50 Okay. Is there follow-up? Is there something that I could do, comedically that I, you think I might be resisting doing comedically. I wish you'd do Uncle Dreech. I wish you'd do Uncle Dreech. I was going to bring out Uncle Driesh today. I was going to also bring out the Frank Sinatra story.
Starting point is 00:43:07 Oh my God. That's my, that's one of the biggest artistic critiques I'd ever had. I almost considered buying it from you. Okay. They're beyond, they don't have an ending. First off, let me say. Dreech and Sinatra listener are very different. Dreech is a strange slice of life.
Starting point is 00:43:25 Frank Sinatra is a perfect story. Okay, I'll start with Sinatra. I'm so jealous. There's two bits I'm really jealous of. Joe Zimmerman has this long thing on Andrew Jackson that I really loved. I've watched it. I watched him do it in a couple different YouTube's,
Starting point is 00:43:41 and then it was on one of his CDs. And I have versions I like more. Like, I really love the bit. Then you have the Frank Sinatra story, which... Well, St. John, it's really simple. Why haven't you fitted into something? Because it doesn't have punchlines. Like, it just has...
Starting point is 00:43:55 The Sinatra story? The Sinatra story is this. Hold on. If you're listening to this, like, really, like, yeah, okay, get ready. So, okay, so the gist of it is like, so I've relatives in Buffalo, New York, and they're, you know, they're not in show business at all, but one time I'm talking to my aunt and I go like, have you ever seen, like, gone to a concert or live show? She goes, well, we were teenagers.
Starting point is 00:44:30 We were teenagers who we went to see Frank Sinatra. And I was like, oh, wow. And she was like, yeah, he came to Buffalo. We were huge fans. And even afterwards, we went into the alley to see him at the stage door. And there was a bunch of us. And he came out. And we couldn't believe it's Frank Sinatra.
Starting point is 00:44:51 And we go, Frankie, Frankie, we love you. And he gets into his car and he pushes us out of the way and goes, get out of the way, you fat pigs. And that's the whole thing. What's amazing about it is that they still love Frank Sinatra. Like, there's nothing this man can do to make them not bad. Out of my way, you fat pigs. Out of my way, you fat pigs.
Starting point is 00:45:19 I think about that story a thousand times a day. It's a crazy story. It's like... Frankie, Frankie. He saw teen girls excited to see him in Buffalo. And if they're teens, this is like the 60s, he's not like 20. He's a man of like 45. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:40 Out of my way, you fat pigs. And she fully did the voice and everything. Yeah, yeah. She had it. And you go, that's not a made up story. That is fully what happened. Oh, I've never in my life doubted. the story.
Starting point is 00:45:57 Oh my God. Get out of my way, you five, because, yeah, someday. Someday I'll figure out, I mean, I just don't. How do you think that has no punch, it is a punchline? It is a punchline. It is a punchline. It's just like, you know, usually I just have to find a causality. So then in that.
Starting point is 00:46:10 I know, but you can all make it up, shoehorn it. Right. Trick is sometimes you got, there's got to be tricks for getting jokes you want into these one person shows where you wedge him in. You go, that doesn't really make sense. And then Uncle Dreech is less. Uncle Dr. Outrageous.
Starting point is 00:46:26 Less outrageous. It's a simple truth. It's a simple truth, which is I got a landline recently. And it's, you know, no one knows the phone number. And so when people, when the phone rings, it's a mistake. Yeah. And so one day it was ringing. And I pick it up and I go, hello.
Starting point is 00:46:51 And the person goes, hey. And I, hey. I adjusted my tone and then they go, who's this? And the voice goes, you don't know? I go, no. And he goes, you better get to know. And I go, no, I don't know who this is. And he goes, Uncle Jish.
Starting point is 00:47:19 I go, Uncle Jish, I do not know you. And he goes, sorry about that. And then he hung up. And no, but you missed that in the middle of the call. Oh yeah. You looked out the blinds. I'd look out the window. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:29 Like in the movie scream at the beginning. You're about to, yeah. You better get to know? You'd be good to know. Then he reveals the name. Every part of it is funny because he seems like he's not going to reveal his name. And then his name couldn't be just slightly stranger. It's Uncle Dreech.
Starting point is 00:47:52 You don't know? Well, you better get to know. You better get to know. No, really, who is it? It's Uncle Dreech. The other joke I do that is in the universe of you, which is, I don't even know if you've seen me do this. I go, sometimes if you're married long enough, you don't even have to express an idea through words. You know, like my friend John said to me, goes, I want to go skydiving for my birthday.
Starting point is 00:48:15 I'd love for you to come. And I go, that sounds amazing. I went home to my wife. I relayed this conversation. She goes, you're going to do that? And that's when I realized I wasn't going to do that. That's so funny. No way. Why would I want to do an activity that seems so dangerous yet so fun?
Starting point is 00:48:30 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because ultimately, I'm more afraid of my wife's judgment of me than I am of jumping out of an airplane at 9,000 feet. Because both activities are somewhat dangerous, but at the end of one of them, you get to die. Yeah. And it's a fun bit. But it was, do you remember saying that to me? Yeah, I had a plan to go skydiving. No, I never went.
Starting point is 00:48:48 I was going to go on my 30th birthday. I was going to go on my 35th birthday. I had lots of plans to go skydiving. You ever going to do it? Maybe, yeah. When I brought it up with Natalie Palamedi, she pointed out that it's one person deciding whether you live or die. But that's everything. That's everything.
Starting point is 00:49:03 That's driving. Yes. That's true. You're right. Driving is that. Owning a knife. Owning a knife is a good example of that. You got one downstairs.
Starting point is 00:49:12 What do you mean? A knife. I put my life in your hands coming here. You have a knife down there. You have a deadly weapon. Right. That's fair. It's not.
Starting point is 00:49:20 Barely makes sense. Well, you said it in your John Mullaney, boy. so it works. Yeah, I said it definitely would work. It would work for like a few dates and then I'd be like,
Starting point is 00:49:30 yeah. You ever show up at gigs? People go, when are you going to do the John Malini voice? I, do you think impressions of me sound like me?
Starting point is 00:49:39 They're in the universe. Like, it's funny, like, Pete Holmes was on and he did it recently. Like, it's not the nuance.
Starting point is 00:49:48 There was a young man on YouTube who did it once. But he did, He went, my mother woke me up at 4 o'clock in that goddamn morning to tell me I was adopted. It was like that and it was like, that's what I think. It wasn't like, hello. You know, that's John Lovitz.
Starting point is 00:50:10 But maybe I sound like that, but I know I don't. Right. I just want to read you something. You can cut this or not, but talking about that. Have you read Stephen King's National Book Award speech? I don't know if I have. When he won the National Book Award, I'll read one part of it. Let me see here.
Starting point is 00:50:35 So it was very controversial Stephen King winning it to some people, people like Harold Bloom, and he gave this speech, basically thanking his wife, saying the entire award was hers. There were some hard, dark years before Carrie. We had two kids and no money, Carrie being the novel that broke him.
Starting point is 00:50:51 We rotated the bills paying on different ones each month. I kept our car, an old Buick, going with duct tape and bailing wire. It was a time when my wife might have been expected to say, why don't you quit spending three hours a night in the laundry room, Steve, smoking cigarettes and drinking beer we can't afford. He would write in the laundry room every night. Why don't you get an actual job?
Starting point is 00:51:09 Okay, this is the real stuff. If she'd asked, I almost certainly would have done it. And then I'm standing up here tonight making a speech, accepting the award wearing a radar dish around my neck. Maybe, more likely not. In fact, the subject of moonlighting did come up once. The head of the English department where I taught told me that the debate club was going to need a new faculty advisor
Starting point is 00:51:27 and he put me up for the job if I wanted. It would pay 300 per school year, which doesn't sound like much, but my yearly take in 1973 was only 6,600. 300 equaled 10 weeks' worth of groceries. The English department head told me he'd need my decision by the end of the week. When I told Tabby about the opening,
Starting point is 00:51:45 she'd asked if I'd still have time to write. I told her not as much. Her response to that was unequivocal. Well, then you can't take it. Isn't that great? Yeah, that's nice. Yeah. That's beautiful.
Starting point is 00:51:55 Yeah. You just come upon that today? I've been thinking about it for a few days. Yeah. I was talking to a friend about it. Do you have bits you're working on? Do you want to share any? Yeah, sure.
Starting point is 00:52:05 You go first. No, no, I said Uncle Driesian. That's not what you're working on. That's not. Those are stories that I've told you for years to do. Fair. It's more interesting when you start. Do you remember when like 10, 11 years ago,
Starting point is 00:52:22 suddenly people were like, hey, don't ever draw the prophet Muhammad. Yes, of course. That was weird, right? Yeah, it's weird. That was, it was interesting. Uh-huh. Not trying to make it tense.
Starting point is 00:52:35 But it was a, it was a, went, oh, okay, I never thought. I was like, I never in my life thought about doing that. Yeah. I don't even draw. I've never drawn a person. Yeah, yeah. If I made a list of a thousand people.
Starting point is 00:52:48 Not in the top thousand. I'll do you one better. I've never thought about the guy. Peace be upon him. I've never thought about it. Yeah. But strange as it seems, now that you tell me I can't draw him, I've never wanted to do anything more.
Starting point is 00:53:01 Yeah. And what is the penalty for doing this? Death, well, immediate death. You have no idea how much that sweetens the pot for an addict like me. It's a strange, it's of note. I want to be respectful. Yeah, it's of note. It's of note.
Starting point is 00:53:17 Don't draw me. Okay. Do you want us to? You brought it up. Right. I'm surprised no one's watching. It's walked it back a little. I've been like, hey, we're okay with the drawing stuff.
Starting point is 00:53:29 You know what I mean? I think it's fair to say it wasn't walked back, yeah. But I don't know also the, I don't know what's happened since that moment in time. No, I think it's not walked back is my sense. Yeah. I would never do it. Oh, I have no plans. No.
Starting point is 00:53:50 Even with a group where we couldn't all get in trouble. Right. I once had this substitute teacher. She came in one day of third grade. Never saw her before. Never saw her since. She comes in. She goes, I'm going to go around the room.
Starting point is 00:54:07 And no fake names. Right. And we were like, oh. Oh, my God. I remember I was Gus. I was like, oh, then fake names you shall get. Oh, fake names. Later, and she was teaching us American history,
Starting point is 00:54:21 and we get to Muhammad Ali, this is Paige on Muhammad Ali. And she goes, boo, I liked when he was named Cassius. It's so funny. So funny. I missed it when he changed that name. Cash. It was great.
Starting point is 00:54:35 This was just a woman. I love the move into substitute teachers, essentially inventing the idea of saying fake names. One, when you said I love the idea of substitute teachers, I know it's somewhat trodden territory, but I also just, just love the idea of it. Like, how about we just don't do it today? Right. Than a totally unqualified. Maybe no class, yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:00 Maybe no class. Or you could be like, I'm sure she, I'm sure there's something you're reading. You could continue doing that as opposed to like, here's a lady. I never liked when he changed his name from Muhammad Ali. Cash is such a cool name. It was so great.
Starting point is 00:55:16 Middle school is endlessly like, uh, amazing when you think, back on memories of middle school. Like I have my scrambler bit, I have different bits. But even like, I have things that I've never even put on stage that are so crazy. Like, I remember my eighth grade science teacher. I'll just call him Mr. Loman.
Starting point is 00:55:38 It was not his name. Okay. Compare him to the most sad, sad, sad character in history. Yeah, Mr. Lohman. I'll just call him. Willie Loman. I'll call him Willie Lohman. But Mr.
Starting point is 00:55:47 Let's just say Mr. Loman would get up in front of, the class and when he turned around the kids in my class not me made a concerted effort they decided that they would throw pennies at his head wow and it's so crazy now as a grown-up to imagine some a group of people throwing pennies at a science teacher an eighth-grade science teacher but at the time it was so funny wow that is That's extreme. It's extreme. Whipping them at his head.
Starting point is 00:56:25 No, it's brutal. Yeah. We had a teacher, I remember the day, the morning after Michael Jordan announced he was retiring the first time. Okay? We've won the three Pete. He tragically loses his father. He retires before the season begins.
Starting point is 00:56:43 I'm in sixth grade. We're in homeroom that morning. The hubbub, you can't imagine a bigger hubbub. Just, oh, my God, my God. Every kid going nuts. Going nuts. So upset. We were so upset. How can he retire? How could he do this? He went, all right, we got to start. People, people, everyone. People, people, people. People, people. People, people. How can he do this? How can he do this? I can't believe this. What's going to happen? He goes, people, people, people. His father didn't just die. He was murdered. He was murdered. He was murdered. Oh, my God. But it was like, it was as if he was also, like, we knew he'd been murdered, but the way he said it was almost like he was revealing it.
Starting point is 00:57:23 Don't you see? His father didn't just die. He was murdered. Oh my God. He was murdered. People would scream at you at that. That's why, have you been yelled at as an adult, like hard? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:37 It's so disorienting. Yeah. Could you go like, it's not like this never happened before. You're like, oh, this is used to happen a lot. But I just knew how to deal with it back then. I had it happen on my first movie. Get out of it. When I made sleepwalk with me,
Starting point is 00:57:53 there was this company that was going to make it. And they decided they weren't going to make it. It was the first company. Yeah, yeah. And I called the guy, hey, we're not going to do it. I'm just going to go off and do it on my own really low budget. And he goes, where are you? So I was like, I'm like, I'll meet you at such and such a pub.
Starting point is 00:58:11 I was like, okay. I go. And he goes, he goes, Mike. It's like, we're having beers at a pub. I'm over with him. If you make this movie, you will fail. Wow. Wow.
Starting point is 00:58:23 And I went home and Jen always talks about this. I had like a buckled over and I had like a stomach ache for three days. But it was just like the being yelled at as a grown up is so devastating. It's so funny. It's bizarre. But you also go like, oh, I used to, the same way sunburns have gotten easier. I was like, this used to be just part of my deal. What are you doing?
Starting point is 00:58:49 Took your shirt in. Huh? Like that was like every. day. Was that the new style to have your shoes unlaced? Someone scream at you.
Starting point is 00:58:58 The craziest people. I've talked so much about lower school, middle school, and lower school like I'm in English. And I have a whole bit on assemblies. But like I still can't,
Starting point is 00:59:08 I still can't get over that people would just come speak to us as a school about things like kidnapping and murder. Oh yeah. It was so funny.
Starting point is 00:59:20 They would just, and not just that. They'd come in and talk about self-esteem. They'd have some, like, I don't know where the school found these people. They had some, like, it was almost like a NACA where we would go entice colleges to book us. There must have been some sort of NACA for, like, I come in and I have a whole weird presentation about self-esteem and I leave each of them with a button. But like, I tell weird stories from my life as a positions coach on the Bears.
Starting point is 00:59:47 You told, I saw, and there was some news clipping or news article, about the Bitten Binder bit that you did the guy being mad about it. Detective Bittenbinder was mad. He said that I mixed it all up to be funny. It was truly like a definition.
Starting point is 01:00:06 He goes, no, he mixed up the details real good. I never wore cowboy hats to the schools, which I, and he has passed on, so I will be respectful. That is not true. He did. He did wear a cowboy hats to the school. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:19 But that was, he's like, so you can tell he's lying because I never wore the cowboy hat to the schools. But he did. This is something I've been doing lately, which I think is kind of fun. It's like I was in a bookstore on the road, and I realized about an hour into it
Starting point is 01:00:34 that it's a feminist bookstore. And I'm like, you can just call it a bookstore. I heard you do that. It made me laugh a lot. It's funny, right? It made me laugh a lot, and I didn't quite get it. Do you mean that if you're selling books,
Starting point is 01:00:47 you're probably... If you're selling books, you're buying books, you're consuming books. You're probably a feminist. But there was a little Jacksonville in it where I was like, I like it and I don't, I just laughed when you said it on stage. Oh, interesting. I just liked it.
Starting point is 01:01:00 And I was like, I just like it. I think he means that. But if he doesn't, I'm also okay with. That's fine too. That's Jacksonville. And then I just go like, I just go like, I think if you're a feminist, I think the last thing you should be telling non-feminist is like, oh, yeah, you don't think men and women should be treated equally.
Starting point is 01:01:17 Well, also, I don't think you should read. You know what I mean? I don't get that part. I don't know. You're saying if you're a feminist don't own a bookstore? No, it's like, it's like if you name something, like a feminist, you're like,
Starting point is 01:01:30 this is a feminist bookstores. It's like, what are you, don't you want people to read? Oh, you mean, why put, readings are already really hard. Why put anything in the title of your store? Yeah, and also like, yeah, exactly. And also like, call it party bookstore.
Starting point is 01:01:44 Yeah, and chances are, like, the more you read, the more likely you'll think men and women should be treated. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like, and then like, I was thinking about feminist bookstores, and I was like, I think sometimes people overname things, like, or overstate them. Like, I was at a bed and breakfast, and you open up the welcome booklet,
Starting point is 01:02:06 and it's like, this is a gay-friendly bed and breakfast. I know. That's really funny. Like a bed-and-breakfast that isn't gay-friendly is a haunted house. It's not a good business model. So I've been doing that run lately. I think it's fun. I think, like, I want to do, like, a larger piece about the overnaming of things.
Starting point is 01:02:30 Like, the undernaming and the overnaming. What do you think's undernamed? Undernamed is, like, I mean, honestly, like, and you saw me do a little pieces. Like, underd disgust, I think is suicide. And I do, like, a whole chunk about it. I won't do it on this podcast yet because I think people will get mad. But I'm like, I think it's such an epidemic. it's such a problem
Starting point is 01:02:51 that I think people should talk about it more and that's part of the reason I've been talking about on stage lately this is crazy we shouldn't be like avoiding this as a topic I thought you were calling the active and crazy which I also know was really funny to say
Starting point is 01:03:05 no no the epidemic of it is crazy knock it off under no circumstances knock it off Fred and I used to talk about going to like a like landing in like South Sudan like war torn ass
Starting point is 01:03:20 like sectarian civil war violence of which we have no understanding going, everybody, knock it off. Multiple guys hanging off a truck with machetes, no way. Stop it right now. Guys, this is crazy. You gotta do that as a bit.
Starting point is 01:03:39 Fred had a sketch that didn't make it to air where it's his first, it's his and Josh Brolin's first day in jail. And Fred makes an announcement to the whole, mess hall like and you know what don't even try it so it's sort of like i speak for both of us and brolin's like no he doesn't and he's like yeah and i'm not joining any gangs okay essay like really like laying it's very funny but we always talk about it guys enough get out of the truck put them down right now
Starting point is 01:04:10 what do you have other bits you know in king kong or like frankenstein or the elephant man when they bring out King Kong, Frankenstein, or the elephant man, and there's like a black tie audience assembled to see this thing? What was that? Can you imagine telling your wife you're going to that?
Starting point is 01:04:30 What are we going to again? This guy is going to unveil something. That's very funny. How long is it? I don't know. It could be a minute and a half. It could be an hour. He's a scientist.
Starting point is 01:04:43 He's been in the jungle for a year, and he's back, and we're going. Do I have to dress a half? up the most you've ever dressed up. Yeah. Full, full gala. Yeah. Full black tie.
Starting point is 01:04:56 Yeah. No, I... And then when it freaks and it charges the audience, except for the elephant man who didn't. What was that? It's funny when people talk about, show business has only gotten less grimy. No, I mean, Jen wrote a poem about this once, Topsy the elephant. people would go to town as a demonstration for
Starting point is 01:05:19 either Tesla or Edison and they would fucking electrocute an elephant publicly? Really? Yeah. Wow. And that was entertainment. You know, it was just like bananas. Wow. Because it was like, can you imagine anything bigger? Getting electrician?
Starting point is 01:05:36 No. Wow. Electricuting... Sorry. Oh, it was a documentary. It's a... It's a documentary from 1903, that's one minute long. That's not a documentary. That's so funny.
Starting point is 01:06:00 By the way, IMDB rates at 2.7 stars. Okay. Really low. Electrocuting an elephant is in 1903, American black and white, silent actuality short. Actuality. I like that. It's an actuality. depicting the killing of elephant topsy by electrocution at Coney Island Amusement Park.
Starting point is 01:06:21 It was produced by the Edison film company part of Edison manufacturing. It was a Thomas Edison demonstration of electricity. Yeah. So I remember hearing that he got pretty weird. You think? Well, no, like for a while, like he got really into the electric chair as well. Now I sound like someone who doesn't know history, but is sort of spouting off. I've never taken a good photo of the moon. That's funny.
Starting point is 01:06:48 It's just a, that's an actuality. Yeah, I like that. I have a lot of those, I guess. I had one that I did with Julio on here, and I think it is funny, which, but I don't know what to do with it, which is I was at breakfast at my hotel. And I was inadvertently, like, dancing in my seat, like, to the music. Uh-huh. And then, uh, the waitress caught my eye. And I realized, um,
Starting point is 01:07:13 I had to make a split-second decision, do I stop dancing? Yeah. Or do I continue dancing? That's really funny. Like, am I a dancer? Right. Or was I a dancer?
Starting point is 01:07:24 Right, right, right. Like, at this point, it's too late. Yeah, I do that with talking to myself a lot. Oh, you do? Like, don't act caught. Yes. You're a great thinker. Right.
Starting point is 01:07:34 Right. No, I think that's good. Do you know, you know, in a foreign currency when, like, they'll be like is 22 million yen but that's actually only like $1,000. I'm always like, can we make these, some of these got to be a little closer.
Starting point is 01:07:53 I'm like, what? I get that it's different, but do you understand how million, like how I would be like, oh, that sounds like a lot at first. And then you always have to go like, that's only like a thousand dollars. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:08:04 600 million lira is about 500 American. You'd be like, can we bring one of them down a little or one of them up? Good, I like that I tried that. I've been thinking about that for a long time and it got nothing. Wait, which one? Just now. I know now to just put that away.
Starting point is 01:08:19 I think it's funny. I just don't know where to go with. I wouldn't know where to go with it. I don't know where to go with most of my favorite things I don't know where to go with. One of the things I love about your shows is like, like, I feel like that might make it in as a tag to something else. I think it might, yeah. Like I find a lot of times with your show, it's like, you're over here. I find that like when you talk about the trampoline parks,
Starting point is 01:08:40 Yeah. It's like you're talking about a trampoline parks and then you're way over here and then you're back in the trampoline parks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's hilarious. Oh, looky again. I figured out a way to get the thing
Starting point is 01:08:49 that doesn't work in. All right, I think we'll go to working out for a cause. Is there a nonprofit you like to support? The Innocence Project. Yeah, I know you support the Innocence Projects a lot. I've done benefits with you over the years to support them. It's a great organization. They use DNA evidence and to try to prove the innocence of people.
Starting point is 01:09:13 Yeah, they've gotten hundreds of people. of people exonerated off of death row. They have other projects as well, taking on the problem of plea bargains and other problems in our justice system. Innocenceproject.org. It is a great organization. It is a great organization.
Starting point is 01:09:26 If you think about the idea of it, that being, treating justice as a sacred thing in our country is a real thing. Absolutely. And I sort of talked to them once about some sort of rock the jury thing. Yeah. In that sitting on a judge,
Starting point is 01:09:44 jury is as much your responsibility as voting. Yeah, I agree. And if you are continually watching true crime documentaries and appalled by verdicts where the obviously innocent person and the jury ignored this, then don't skip jury duty. Yeah. We're going to contribute to them. We're going to link to them in the show notes. John, I continue to be in awe of all of your work.
Starting point is 01:10:06 What were your favorite parts of the podcast? Of this? Yeah. We could talk about it. It was really fun. Working it out. Because it's not done. We're working it out because there's no...
Starting point is 01:10:20 That's going to do it for another episode of Working It Out. You can follow John Mulaney on Instagram at John Malini. You already do. You can find his tour dates at John Mullaney.com. Check up berbiggs.com to sign up for the mailing list to be the first to know about my upcoming shows. You can watch the full video of this episode on our YouTube channel at Mike Barbiglia. If you've never watched the shows before, this would be a good one to go watch. If you're willing to subscribe, we appreciate it.
Starting point is 01:10:47 It helps us out a lot. Our producers of working it out are myself, along with Peter Salomon, Joseph Barbiglia, Mabel Lewis, and Gary Simons. Sound Mixed by Shub Sarin, Supervising Engineer Kate Balinski. Special thanks, as always, to Jack Antonoff and bleachers for the music they've been with us. Since the very beginning, special thanks to my wife, the poet, Jehovah Stein, and our daughter, Una, who built the original Radio Fort made of pillows in 2020. Thanks most of all to you who are listening
Starting point is 01:11:16 and have stuck with us for five and a half years. If you enjoy the show, now would be the time to rate us and review us on Apple Podcasts. It helps us out. Tell your friends, tell your enemies, tell the monkey you're about to shoot in a space. Right before that hatch closes, just say, hey, little fella,
Starting point is 01:11:34 here's an old iPhone preloaded with 200 episodes of Mike Barbigli is working it out. It's a podcast where Mike Barbigli talks to other comedians and other creatives about the process. No, he doesn't talk to monkeys, but I think you'll like it just the same. Why 200 episodes? Well, you might be up there for a while. Thanks, everybody. We're working it out. We'll see you next time.

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