Mike Birbiglia's Working It Out - 223. Emmy Blotnick: Don’t Take That Deal

Episode Date: September 14, 2026

Mike is joined by comedian and writer Emmy Blotnick, whose new special “What’s Her Secret?” hit YouTube this summer. Emmy, a former writer for The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, talks about getting more personal in her new special, discussing on stage her challenging relationship with her father, and her brother’s imprisonment for financial crimes. Emmy and Mike also dive deeper in Mike’s “hot people industry” jokes, as Emmy has many thoughts about Sephora. Plus, Emmy recalls a vital piece of advice Mike gave her about a bad show business deal.Please consider donating to 826NYCText BIRBIGS to 917-444-7150 for updatesFind Mike:Website: https://birbigs.com/Instagram: https://instagram.com/birbigs/Facebook: https://facebook.com/birbigfansTikTok: https://tiktok.com/@mikebirbigliaFind Emmy:Website: https://www.emmyblotnick.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/emmyblotnick/Hosted and Produced by Mike BirbigliaProducers: Peter Salomone, Joseph Birbiglia, Mabel Lewis, Gary SimonsSound Mixed by Ben KruseSupervising Engineer: Kate BilinskiVideo Consultant: Graham WilloughbySpecial Thanks: Marissa Hurwitz, Josh Upfal, David Raphael, Nina Cwik, J. Hope Stein, OonaMusic: Jack Antonoff and Bleachers Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What is the best piece of advice someone's giving you that you used? Actually, I'm going to say this might be from you. I have a good piece of advice from you, which was, so this special took a while to come out because originally I had an offer from a big company. And I remember I saw you outside the seller. And I was like, here's this offer that's come my way. And they were like, they would pay to make the special, but I wouldn't own it and I wouldn't get paid. And you said, that's the worst deal I've ever heard.

And so I was like, well, I have to, I should probably figure something else out. And I'm glad I didn't take that deal. Hey, everybody, it's Mike Barbaglia. This is Working It Out. We're back. That's the voice of the great Emmy Blotnick. It's a long time in the making. Emmy and I've been talking about this forever. I always run into her at the Comedy Cellar in New York City.

Just a phenomenal comedian. I've toured with her and a couple of my stand. end up in vote shows. She's got a new special out on YouTube called What's Her Secret? And I talk about this on the episode today. I've known Emmy for years, and I've always been a fan of her comedy. But the new special is so personal that I feel like I got to know her in a way that I didn't before seeing it.

It was great. I think you're really going to like this episode. As always, you can watch, not just listen, but watch this episode on YouTube and Spotify. And apparently soon, you can watch it also on Apple Podcasts. While you're over there on Apple Podcasts, you could sign up for work. Working it out premium. For $4.99 a month, you get no ads in any episode. You get exclusive bonus content.

And you support the show. We appreciate it. It's an independent production. I love this chat today with Emmy Blotnik. Great comic. She wrote for The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. Her special's hilarious. Thrilled that Emmy came by today.

Enjoy my conversation with the great Emmy Blotnick. Your special is so funny. It is called Emmy Blotnick. What is her secret? What's her secret? Do you have a secret? I don't think I do, but it's a question that people ask about beautiful older women a lot. Yes.

When somebody is like 60, but looks great. They think, what's her secret? And nobody's ever asked that about me. But I have spent a lot of money in pursuit of somebody eventually asking me my secret. It's funny, you talk, I liked about Sephora and how you spent so much money that they essentially alerted you. That's a nice way to say, yes. Having spent $1,000.

But even then I was like, did she spend more than $1,000? Collectively, for sure, because I've gotten that status, the, like, special you spent too much money status, like, two years back to back. So I'm like, not learning. I'm, like, reflecting that I don't like how this. feels, but I'm not actually changing the habit. Right. And, yeah, it's not a great feeling. But, yeah, so the answer to what's her secret is I've spent $1,000 at Sephora and I didn't

learn anything. I feel like at some point there might be like a Sephora WikiLeaks kind of moment where, like, it's a conference call where they're like, hey, so nothing is doing anything. The lotions don't actually do anything. Yeah. Yeah. We've told people that they do things. They definitely don't.

I think the best, maybe the, like the best case scenario is that you've spent some time with yourself and your hands have been covered in lotion. That's what it is. So you haven't been on your phone. Right, right. Like you've been in the bathroom with wet, gloopy hands. So that's like, that's a form of self-care. That's a good variation on what Sephora is doing.

That's positive. I guess. But I don't know if I think it would be. more positive to like go for a walk or something. I wanted to, it's funny because when I saw your special, it reminded me of I wanted to do this bit, but I haven't done it on stage. Do you ever have bits where you want to do on stage, but you're like, I can't handle to see the audience's face when I do this the first time?

100%. So this is my bit about that. Okay. Multi-billion dollar beauty industry. We're all spending a fortune. I'm spending a fortune on, yeah, sure, creams and this, whatever, you know. Like everybody spends some amount of money on this stuff, right? And it's all this huge industry about being hot.

How many people a day do you see are hot? It depends what city you're in. Okay. I'm going to try to get real technical. Less than five, less than 10, less than 20, less than 50. Okay. But is it like, is it a Saturday on Rodeo Drive? No, no, it absolutely is not.

Okay, you're just taking a somewhere. You're on 23rd and 6. Maybe 11, maybe 5. Okay. I guess I'm going to start counting. Okay, that's what I'm getting at. This is what the bit wants to be. Okay.

Okay. Five hot people a day. How many people you see in a day? Oh. Right? Yes. Now it's like a thousand. Yes.

Yes. Yes. This is like where's Waldo level ratio. Right. So you're going 0.5% of people are hot. Right. And they're all using the products. This is a fan.

industry. That's a great day. They are failing at making people hot. Do you think, though, that, like, so the industry is huge now, but compared to, like, 20 years ago, do you think it would be the same volume of hot people? I think it was always this way. Wow. I think it was always, I grew in the 80s.

It was always beauty products and creams and this and that. Maybe it's more guys now or whatever, but it was like, that was always huge. I guess I feel like now it's more of, like, I get the feeling like it's like an arms race now. Like there's just more and more technologies to apply to yourself to, to, uh, up your, your, uh, conventional hotness. I think it always was that way. Because I remember when when I was a kid like, like, like my mom would take me to like Gloria Stevens like workout center and I would just sit and read magazines while she like like did like, like, like, like leg lifts with like 30 women in a room. Like it's always, it's been this.

this way since the beginning of time, I think. I think, yes. I think people have always wanted to beautify themselves. I feel like now there's just more, more avenues to pursue. Because, like, I'm thinking of when I was a kid, it would be like, people would, like, frost the tips of their hair and be like, am I hotter now? Of course. But now it's like you inject your face or something.

It's like just a different scale of, I saw a great article that. tried to frame it like in older times the cameras had a blurring effect because they were like lower definition yeah and now that the cameras are very high definition the burden is on the person 100% to blur themselves essentially to like do the do the things that like a low quality camera would do for them and I'm like well that feels like where some of us are getting hamstrung is like I just want to be seen by people with worse vision, I think. Totally. But.

Get yourself. Get yourself a fella who's got bad vision. Then you always look great. Jesus. But yes, I think your ratio of, it's 0.5% of people are hot. And to what end? To what end? Does it change your life?

And also, were those people hot to begin with? Probably. You know what I mean? You might not to stop. Yeah. Like, are they even using the products? Maybe not. Yeah, no, I think the end of the, and also hotness is not one set of things either.

Oh, no, of course. I mean, that's, maybe that's where the bit goes if it becomes a bit. It's like, in and it's subjective anyway. So do you think we should all give up? Yeah, I think we should give up. I think so, too. I wish we could all stop at the same time. Let's all stop at the same time.

Just, you know, put some, put some, like, nice warm lighting around. and I don't know. I'm sorry to lead with a bit like that. It's just like your special made me think of it so much. It's exhausting to try to keep up with like what. I feel like it's a women's thing, but it's kind of a relief to hear that you also feel. No, it's a whole looks maxing with men thing now.

That's a whole thing. I feel like maybe the superhero movies were the first time I noticed men being like, that's not. That guy's on steroids. Like, people can't look like that. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, well, that's what women have been feeling for so long. It's like, yeah.

Yeah. Now, welcome to the table. You're upset. Thanks for coming. Yeah, you're upset about it, but it's, you know, great jaw lines and stuff. I feel like I've known you for years just at the comedy seller, just around, and I've always loved your stand-up. And I feel like this special made me understand more about you.

your life and in this way that I was like, oh, wow. Like your dad's not alive. You say he was a bad guy. Your brother's in jail. I was like, first of all, I was like, who are your male role models? It's Mike for Biglia. Yes, that's right. No, there's like not a, yeah, not a ton of male role models.

I didn't know I was so significant in that change. I didn't need to push that. I really just said the first thing I looked at. Right. A poster of me on the wall. Yeah. But I was like, yeah, not a ton of male role models, I guess. It's a lot of pressure on your husband.

He's a great role model. Yeah, because he's got to be. That's true. He's very, he's like polite and nurturing in a way that nobody in my family is. That's sweet. Yeah. Yeah. I was thinking, like, if you're him, you either have a lot of pressure or no pressure.

I think it comes to him pretty naturally to be that way. Yeah. He's like a Minnesotan guy who went to culinary school and working. restaurants. So he's like, he has a lot of like, sort of naturally occurring kindness and like caretaking sort of instincts, which, totally. I'm just soaking it up as much as I can. I love that. Who are, do you have, did you have male role models? Mine was like, you know, was my dad. It's just, which is, he was intense. But he's also, you know, he's smart in academic. And so, you know, and hardworking.

But yeah, not a ton. I mean, like, you know, my brother, who's great, but, like, yeah, you're talking about your brother being in jail. First of all, you talk about your mom said, don't tell this joke because you go, my mom's a four and I'm a five. It's like, it's making money a moment. She's like, don't tell that joke. And then you, my friends, you know, don't like it. And she's like, oh, you're like, how would they see it? She's like, I sent it to them, which is so funny.

But like, did you, like, what would be the point where you don't do the joke? Because your mom literally objected. And it's kind of funny because we, so the comedy seller posted a clip of that joke pretty recently. And she saw it again. But I think she forgot that she saw it during Trump's first term. Yeah. So she sent me this email being like, like, fuck you. like do not put me in your material.

Your mom specials coming out in like two days. Oh my God. It's just like there's no turning back. Oh my God. But it's also like, okay. That's how contentious it is with your mom. I think she also like, in defense of the joke, I guess, is that I don't call women fours.

Donald Trump calls women fours. Right, right, right. And it's through the lens of how he sees. Right. People in terms of their identity and stuff like that. And like anybody who, you know, like, yeah, if I, at this point I think it's anyone who's like different from him or like. Yeah, yeah, of course.

Is just automatically not useful or whatever. Yeah. But I don't call. I don't know. Oh, he's a 10 out of 10 MacD up. But it's like, I wouldn't call my mom ugly. Barely alive. Kind of like.

You see so many scrapes and bruises on. Just like, like, drop, like, bumps and wounds and hair is like, is absolutely like a sculpture of sorts. For sure. She's a four. It's like, what? It's, of course, he doesn't meet any of his own standards. Yeah, no, no, he's not. I don't judge women in numerical terms he does.

That's why that's part of the joke. Yeah, that's a joke. But, yeah, she saw it again and didn't like it. again and uh i i it's too late it's too late but like my question is what is the line right so like you talk about your brother being in prison does he will he get mad uh probably has he seen it not that i know of oh god are you out of touch uh we're like loosely in touch loosely in touch letters yes letters well because in you know in prison you get like a 10 minute phone call like it's interrupted by like, this is a call from a federal.

So it's hard to have like substantial conversations. Right. During those. So we're like due for a chat of some sort. But it's also like they are jokes. It's not like me just airing grievances. No, no, of course. It's like meant to be like a way of digesting your life a little bit.

And like maybe other people. I've had plenty of other people come up to me and say like, I'm in a similar situation and like relate. Of course. So there's reward in that. And it's obviously like if I flat out hated them, I wouldn't bother thinking or feeling about them, I think. So I don't know. Melanie and I were talking about this exact thing.

Oh, really? On this show, which is if you're talking about someone, you care enough to be thinking about them. Yes, you feel some sense of disappointment because you want it to. to be something else. It's a little bit of an idle defense. Like it doesn't, it's not, it's not bulletproof, but it's, there's something there. Yeah. And you're trashing someone, you're thinking about them.

Definitely. It's like the very, it's very like today's attention economy. That's right. Good and bad. It's all attention. Right. This is actually the first time I've had to try to defend my artistic choices. So that's, this is already very interesting for me.

No, I'm sure. No, absolutely. But yeah, it's, if you just straight up have no regard for the person, you wouldn't spend time trying to understand, I think. No, totally. Where did you guys land on it? On telling jokes about people in my life? Yeah.

I mean, I don't think my parents love it. I think they gave up on that one a while ago, you know, because I've been doing a long time. Like in my 20s, I was doing it. immediately talking about them. And they would say, a lot of it would be like they'd say stuff to my brother, you know, that kind of thing. And he would tell me just so, you know, I'm and dad don't like this or that.

The good old-fashioned triangulation. I know. Yeah. Very healthy. But that's also part of how you get here is that you can't, if you can't have direct open conversations with the people that are causing you these feelings. Let this be a lesson to you. Yeah, come direct.

Yeah, come at me. Yeah, like working out, we could work it out somewhere else. Yeah, that's a good point. I also did feel like, I mean, it's sort of like with my brother's situation, like he was obviously going through like a type of hell. I think my mom was too. And there wasn't, it didn't feel like there was room for me to like be like, and here's how I feel.

So that's where the stage comes in handy there because I can at least be like, you know, like, I don't know. I always think of that. It was like the source of me being a comedian even was just growing up Catholic in central Massachusetts. And it's like a lot of like don't tell anyone, don't talk about this. And then it's like, well, obviously people are going to talk about it if you tell them not to talk about it. That's very true. You know, it's kind of the nature of things.

And yeah, are you the youngest in your family? Youngest of four, yeah. I'm the youngest too. And I feel like that's maybe also a piece of it that like the youngest in the family is always kind of disregarded and like not heard. And then you're like, well, when I grow up, I'm going to be so freaking loud about everything. You can't stop me. It's going to be on YouTube. It's going to be, I'm uploading it to the most accessible platform.

And yeah, maybe you should have listened to me when I was an annoying little kid. Yeah, I made fun of Pete Holmes for having a special on YouTube, but I have to say, like, it does reach the most people. It's everyone. Yeah, yeah. Yes. It's the world. It's the world. It doesn't feel like you, like if you're somebody who likes institutional approval or that kind of validation.

You don't need that. Oh, HBO made it. Then, like, yeah, it sometimes feels a little bit like, oh, it's on YouTube. No, I think it's great. Thanks. I'm just thrilled that people get to see your jokes because I've been watching your jokes for years live. and I loved, like, I didn't know all of them, but I knew, like, 25 minutes of them, and I just think you're a great joke writer, and it was fun to be like, oh, everyone's going to get to see these jokes now.

Thank you. It was really fun. Yeah, I appreciate that. One of the things that sticks out is, like, the jokes are so original. Like, do you ever kind of original proof your jokes by, like, checking with people, like, hey, do you have a thing on this? Yes, I do that sometimes when, do you ever have a joke? occur to you too easily and you're like, if it can't do you this easily, there's a good chance I accidentally, like, I heard it somewhere and it like resurfaced in my head. I talked about

that with Wanda Sykes yesterday. Same exact thing. Like sometimes you're just like, someone must have thought of this, right? A hundred percent. Yeah. Like sometimes every once in a while, like I do bump into one where I'm like, this doesn't feel like, I'm like, I think someone's done this and I can't find it, but I'm just going to like let it go. Does it ever happen that it is the case? I don't think. I think it's hell does it too. He does. I'll get a text from them every once in a while that's like,

do you know anybody who does a bit about like the dome-shaped lids at Starbucks when they don't have a flat lids? And I'm like, no, that's you. That's you. But I'm really flattered that I'm somebody he would check with. By the way, I already love that bit. I know. The dome-shaped lids. It's always something really like honed in and specific.

and but it's for somebody that good. He's one of the great. He really is. Those are probably the two people I like watching the most at the comedy seller is David Tell and Chris Rock. Yeah. When they are doing sets. Like in Colin Quinn, I think. It's just like in that 140 seat room to see someone who's like could play any size of room.

I like that too. Yeah. And Attell always has, I feel like you don't see him do the same. set twice, which is really impressive to me. I've never seen him even feel the same twice. Yeah. Yeah. And sometimes you'll see him absolutely crush and then he'll be like, I didn't like them. I'm like, well, that was like, I would be so happy if a set ever went that well for me. Isn't that so funny with comedians where you'll see someone crush and walk off and just be like, no? Yeah. It's like, I mean, I guess everybody has their own sort of internal rating

system or like their own criteria of how it goes. But yeah, it's, it's a, I don't know. I love the joke that you say about your brother went to jail for finance and you go, you got to fake until you make it unless you don't make it and then it's just fraud. Yeah. That is a great joke. Thank you. It is so tight. Like it's so, and by the way, that's a good example of like, you'd probably have to check that somewhere to be like, has someone? thought of this? Like, hasn't someone done a joke about fake it till you make it? Yeah, I guess. That one I didn't feel, for some reason, I remember feeling like, oh, these pieces just fit together and I think that's, I think that's enough. It's such a smart

point, though. Faking until you make it is so hinged on making it. Yeah, and it's like, we're in, we're definitely in a time of like, it's very, it's almost normal for people to commit fraud right now. So. Of course. Like fire festival feels like quaint at this point. Oh my gosh. You talk about not being cat called anymore. You get heckled. Yeah.

I e. A guy said to you, I'm sick of you, nervous-looking white hose. And you were basically just like, that's too good of an observation. It was so accurate. It, like, shocked me. It's so funny. I got one coming home from the cellar in January when it was snow. I had on a red hat, like a knit hat, not like a maggot, whatever, you know, what kind of hat?

And a random guy said, I like your red hat. Don't listen to what your friends say. And I'm going to go, whoa, that's not a cat call. That's just like, I'm just supposed to think about that until I get home. I love don't listen to what your friends say. He thought, like, people had tried to discourage me from wearing this hat, I don't know. I think it's just a different energy that happens. happens when you get to be a full-fledged adult.

I'm sick of you, nervous-looking white hose. You know what is funny is, like, I did a bit on this show the other day in the Pete Holmes episode about how, about we all, like, there's phrases we all know. Like, we all know the phrase, bros before hose, which is insane. Yes. You know, because honestly, bros before hose is just a cry for help from some guy who needs a hug. And he wants to ask his friend Steve. for a hug, but instead he's got to dress it up

in so much misogyny that no one thinks he's sensitive. Oh my God. Wait, that's so true. I don't, but he, bros before hoes is like, it's an abandonment cry. Desperate. It's totally. It's a sad moment in a man's life. It's a ho has taken my bro

from me. Lucky Valaz had a funny tag for my bit, which is sometimes hos are bros before hos. Yes. Yes. It's actually not It is not a gendered. It does not, you do not have to be a bro. You don't have to be a bro.

That's a good point. Yep. And also I don't condone the use of the word, oh. No, of course. Just for the record. No. When you got fitted for a wedding ring, the salesperson said, this is from your special. It's always going to spin because you have wide knuckles.

I love that joke. Oh, thanks. When people insult you, do you think thank you for that? Sometimes. Because you can use it? Yeah. I had a bit that did not end up in this special that was when I was fitted for a bra and the lady said, you have a wide back. I love that. I was like, wow, that's like a tight.

I'm most grateful for the burns I could not have seen coming. Like your hands are the wrong shape for jewelry or like your back is big and that's why your bra doesn't fit. It really got me thinking about this idea of like When people insult you or me, we're comedians So we just put it on stage Yeah Like I had a thing where a casting director I ran into after a years and

I go hey Mike Barbiga audition for years ago She goes Mike Priglio, you used to be big and fat I was like the insulting part of that is the word and But it's like For me I'm always like immediately stage I'm like try it on stage It's fun

that that happened. It just comes like whack, like just such a sudden response to like, that's your first thought about me? Yeah, yeah. That's apparently what you've been percolating on for years. That's the impression I left. But my question is, this is like an open-ended thought. If you're not a comedian, how can you use it?

I mean, I wonder if you're, and it's also like a certain type of comedian, too, because some comics don't care to. deal with self-deprecating stuff. Some comedians like to be like, cool guys. Like when Andrew Dice Clay talk about a casting director knocking him? No. Like, we're in a nice position to use those. Like, they become material.

But, yeah, I guess if you just have to carry an insult around, then suddenly you're like, maybe those are the people that leave anonymous comments. Those might be the people that go online. You're ugly and you just quit, you know. Right. Do you have a, because you've worked in a lot of writers' rooms. We were just talking about how you wrote for Malani and Kroll for the Indy Spirit Awards.

You've written for Colbert. Do you have tips for people, like in writers' rooms or just collaboration in general? Oh, that's a good question. I think the main thing that I, or one thing I would give as a tip is to, try not to be too protective of like that's mine like to not be like especially when you're working in a group of something you pitched ends up getting cut to not like fight irrationally for your thing to be there because it's mine like that's I think one thing one thing that's nice with stand-up is it is all yours so you get to decide what stays and goes yeah but when you're

working with a group, you kind of want to, like, let your, put, like, put your ego aside. Best idea wins. Yes, the best thing for the show. And if your stuff is not in the final product, but you were helpful the whole way, that's still, you still did your job. That's right. It's hugely helpful. And, yeah, so it's, you know, like, being part of the, like, group is a good, like, listening. More of the, like, improv-type rules, I think, start to apply in writer's rooms.

It's like, listen, don't say no to stuff, unless you have something that's better. And, yeah, think of the product that everyone is trying to achieve together instead of, like, me, me, me, me, me. This is called The Slow Round. What's a song that makes you cry? Okay. I saw Robin on New Year's Eve. and she did dancing on my own, but she had the crowd sing it with no music,

and then she left the stage. Wow. And I just was like, oh, my God, oh, my God. And then she came back out and finished the song, and that was the full. That was a full sob for me. That's intense. It was pretty intense.

I noticed I cry more at concerts than I used to, but I'm not sure I can think of a song where you hit play and it just goes. Before I directed my first movie, sleepwalk with me, I shadowed Lena Dunham on girls directing and it was that first episode where it ends with the song

dancing on my own, I Robin. Yeah. And I remember watching Allison and Lena in the scene from the monitor and just going, this show's going to be huge. I have this distinct memory of it. It's such a good song and

yeah, hearing a lot of people sing together is one of the like that's a new tear-jurking thing for me. Oh, yes. So like 3,000 people all screaming it at the top of their lungs after New Year's Eve. Yes. Like after midnight was like a huge, huge sob for me. What are people's favorite and least favorite thing about you?

A couple, maybe once or twice a year, I will get really drunk and then pick up an expensive tab for a large. group. This is something that I'm like, I've noticed I've done this a couple years in a row. It doesn't, it's not, I'm not always doing great when it happens. But sometimes I'm just like, I like being like, it's all, it's all taking care of already. And the next day I'll deal with the fallout of like, oh my God, what I do. Right. I'm in debt. But in the moment, it feels so good. Fun. I feel pretty loved. Love that. Something. I'm, least favorite, I'm forgetful of people's birthdays.

And I think that, yeah, not everybody cares if you forget their birthday, but some people are like, it was my birthday. What the hell? I didn't hear from you. It's my family. Right, your family, yeah, more with your mom. I'm bad at reaching out to people. It's not just birthdays. Why?

I'm bad at being, like. Why? I assume people that it will be not received well, I think. If I'm like, hey, it's been a while, how have you been? Right. Oh, this person wants to talk to me. But, like, I'm bad at, like, maintaining if we don't live in the same city and don't see each other naturally, I'm bad at keeping those relationships alive. The movie I'm writing right now is a lot in this space of, like, friendship and old friends and new friends.

And, like, how do you navigate that? It's like, I think there's no rules. I think that's what's so messy about this whole communicating with people thing. The expectation is pretty high, I feel like, because now we all have phones, and so there's a lot of ways you can do it. Right. But I'm bad at initiating that stuff. And for some people, they don't care, and you can pick up right where you left off.

Yeah. But then for other people, they're like, I never hear from you. You must, like, what's, you know? And they take it personally. So that's one where I'm like, I would love to. get better at being the one to reach out and be like how it's like let's catch up and stuff like that plus they only see you in social media so they're like well you're always smiling you always seem very happy without me right and it's like well it's yeah i i i um do you talk on the phone a lot are you somebody who does a lot of like i like the phone talking yeah i feel like this might be a generational

possibly a generation it is i think but i think maybe you're a general generation likes texting more. Yeah. My generation likes talking more. Holding the phone to my head. I'm always like, oh, it's so uncomfortable. Yeah, yeah. I get it. But then I don't want to be headphones either. I don't want to be walking down the street with no phone. Shouting. Yeah. Shouting, talk, stock tips. It's so common by myself. Everybody's doing that. Yeah. But I, for some reason, I can't, I can't find a groove with that. I think that's my, that's the least favorite. What is the strangest thing in your algorithm that gets served to you? It's not just dogs. It's dogs that solve cry. That's something I've noticed.

It's like a dog at the airport smelled somebody who had smuggled in a hundred meat sandwiches from another country. And so it's, you know, cute dogs, everybody I think gets some of that. But I specifically get crime-solving dogs. And I don't know why that's where the algorithm went. But I love the story. Now we're just bragging. Maybe they've combined my interests. But it's, you know, I've noticed a couple times where it's like a dog found like a lot of cash in someone's suitcase or like a dog stopped like a robbery or something like that.

And that pops in. What is the best piece of advice someone's giving you that you used? Actually, I'm going to say this might be from you. I have a good piece of advice from you, which was, so this special took a while to come out because, Originally, I had an offer from a big company, and I remember I saw you outside the seller, and I was like, here's this offer that's come my way. And they were like, they would pay to make the special, but I wouldn't own it, and I wouldn't get paid. And you said, that's the worst deal I've ever heard.

Oh, God. And so I was like, well, I have to, I should probably figure something else out. And I'm glad I didn't take that deal. Because you own it now? I think I own at least some of it. Right. The other part of that deal was there's no guarantee it would ever air anywhere. Right.

They wouldn't guarantee that it would ever see the light of day. That was the part that made it a really bad deal, I think. But I was like in the middle of like, what if this worked out? Like trying to be optimistic. Right. And I think you like pierced my bubble of delusion very nicely. You know what part, the zoom out on that, I think is, I think part of what we all want, you know, often this is in show business, but it's in every job in a certain way. It's like we want a parent figure to swoop in and solve our thing and give us validation.

But actually, like, more often than not, the validation is going to come from a thing we're doing and figuring out, you know? Yeah. So it's like, like, more often than not, I always tell people, like, shoot to film their own special. I think that's probably. The camera technology is unbelievable. Definitely. You don't need as much equipment, like specialized equipment as you used to to do it. And, yeah, you don't need to take a deal where they could buy your hour and then shelve it.

Yeah. That would have been sad if that had happened. Totally. I think that was good advice from you. Do you have any jokes you're working on that aren't done? Boy, do I? Brought the notebook and everything. Oh, nice. Amazing.

Okay. here's here's one I've only told like maybe one or two times and I'm not sure okay it was my husband's birthday

and I wanted to get him flowers and I went to like a specialty florist like a small business or it's like an eccentric older woman florist and I was like I want to get flowers for my husband and she was like flowers for a man was like scandalized by this idea

and I was like yeah, could you make me a bouquet? And she like went into the back. And she came out with a bouquet that was all wrapped up already. But the flower, the centerpiece flower looked like an erect penis. And it had two like ball-shaped flowers, like orange, vainy, spherical flowers. Yes. And it was all wrapped up.

So I didn't want to be like, no. Right. But so it's just this weird moment where I'm like, here are these flowers. Here, I hope you like them. Maybe you want to suck these. I don't know. Is that the implication with the penis flowers? Do you think that it's, is it that he's gay or he's?

I think it might be that flowers that aren't penis shaped are gay. And so for one's flowers that are for a man should look like a man. You know it's funny? Now I'm getting it more. You're on her side? Yeah, no, no. She's so right. She was so right to get it.

you those penis flowers. No, no, I actually, it actually makes me understand, like, like, do you think she meant it that way? Like, penis flowers for a man? Yes. Masculine flowers. Yes, because I go to, I've gone back to her. And when it's just like, oh, flowers for the dining table, they don't have the dick and balls in them. Right. She's not, like, I think that might be a fun place to take it is like, is like when I've gotten flowers for other occasions, it's never XYZ. Yes. Just because, like, she's. like, that is wild. Yeah, I would say actually, like, for my, if I were her, I would give the cock and balls

bouquet for like a bachelorette party or something like that, as opposed to a man who already, yeah, who doesn't need to be reminded that he's, yeah, it was just a really goofy, really goofy gift. I wrote this down, which is, why does the governor's, still need a mansion. Isn't that a little outdated in a housing crisis? Can't we have a governor's apartment? I like that.

She's like, I'm in the, I'm in the, I'm in the governor's apartment. I didn't pay utilities, so everything's off. You know what I mean? The neighbor, my governor's neighbors are making a lot of noise today. They're wearing clogs around the house. Yeah, the governor's mansion seems like it should be like a museum or something now. That's right. It's converted into some event space or something.

past it. Yeah. Or past the governor's mansion. It's sort of like, yeah, a lot of old houses have like servants' quarters and stuff like that, but people don't have servants anymore. Right. Right. Yeah.

Get an apartment. I had this other one, which is I was in Los Angeles for that Netflix festival, and the hotel I was in, the whole side of the building was a billboard with a lady wearing only a thong and then covering her body was a purse. Oh. And it put me in a tricky spot because I'm like waiting in front of the hotel and it's sort of the only thing you can look at?

Yeah. You're kind of like, that's my hotel. That's such an L.A. experience. I was also just out there and had a blinking Sebastian Manascalco billboard outside my room. And I'm like, so I have to keep the shades closed or it's going to be blinking red light. But yeah, just a purse as clothing.

I, it's, that's a photo only sort of thing. You can't like, you can't like leave the room. Can't walk around like that. I just wrote it. So it's, so it was just a bunch of people looking at me, looking at a lady and a thong. But it's not my fault. Right. Like, I don't even know what they're advertising.

I don't know if it's the thong or the purse or the lady. Chances are it's for AI. I feel that's AI. Yeah, it could be for. any of those things. It's, you know. Do you have anything else? I have, if you're in a, like, an Uber or a taxi and they're playing Christian rock music and you don't say anything and let them play that at the end of the ride, do you kind of want them to

thank you for your tolerance? I have the same pet peeve about Christian rock and the Ubers. I'm like, I just sat through a seven-minute song called God is glorious. Yes. And don't you think your God would want you to show some gratitude to the Jewish person that sat through this crazy song? I had one, it's funny, it's funny, it's up on this wall, I think, but it's like, I wrote about Christian rock, if Jesus loved you, this song would be better. They're always repetitive. Yeah, yeah.

It's like, God said more stuff than this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's so true. Oh, my God. I had a joke the other day, which was like, which was like, I think wars of religion are insane. It's like, you're telling me you don't believe in a Harry Potter 2, but you believe in Harry Potter 1?

You know what I mean? Because it literally is the same books. Yeah. It's madness to me. And I think it might be, it might follow the rule of sequels to where it gets worse with each edition. That's right. That could be true. I'm glad that you don't like.

Christian music either. Oh, my God. Sometimes you're like, why do I have to, like, I would feel like a, I would feel like a dick if I was like, hey, turn this off. Yes, yes. But then for sitting through it, I want to be appreciated. Yeah, yeah. You could, like, stick it to them and be like, hey, thanks for helping me understand your culture. Yeah.

That would be, I wonder if that would even register. Yeah, no, I don't think of it. I had one other thing about the subway, which is I was on the subway. This could maybe pair with the earlier subway. I had a bit about the subway the other day, which was I was on the subway. There was a shirtless man holding a box of drumstick ice cream cones in one hand and pretending to talk into a phone that isn't there in the other. And I thought, I get that guy.

I feel like I'm three bad decisions away from that being my life. Wait, the box of ice cream cones. It's got the drumsticks in one hand, and he's imagining talking on a phone in the They're like, you know, I get it. I sort of get it. That's so funny. Yeah. You would think maybe he'd want to use the drumstick as a phone.

Oh, right. There's no prop for the phone. That'd be good too. But what was the conversation? Do you remember? Gosh, I don't remember. It was just like some of these New York moments are so surreal that like you just remember a piece of them.

Yeah. Like, I don't know about you. I'm always with a notebook just like, okay. Right. Like, what was that? What is this? But I see what you're saying. Like the guy, he's got to get, carrying ice cream on the subway is already a very urgent situation.

Yes. And then, you know, you want to get your calls done while you're on in transit. That's funny. That's great. And once I get home, I'm going to be busy with this. That's right. That's right. I think that's what it is.

The elements are relatable. Yeah. It's the things together that bring it into insanity. Right. Right. It's like, well, I've done that. I got what I needed to get. I've been bringing to the birthday party.

I've been bringing to an 11-year-old birthday party, the drumsticks. And I've been on the phone and then realized there's nothing in my hands. I've just never done them at the same time. I like that. Yeah, it's fun. Yeah. That's fun. I like that.

That's working it out. That's the true nature of working it out. Hooray. The final thing we do is working out for our cause. Is there a nonprofit? that you like to contribute to, and then we will contribute to them and then link to them in the show notes. I recently hosted a trivia night for 826, NYC. 826, yeah, yeah, that's a great organization.

And I thought they were wonderful, a wonderful bunch of people, and I would be happy to... 826. I'm just going to say their thing because NYC, because I've done events for them before, too. it's 826 NYC.org exploring endless possibilities through the power of writing it's a lot of like after school programs and things for kids

and it's a great organization and I will contribute to them I will link to them in the show notes Amy Blotnick I love your special congratulations I hope people go watch it right now on YouTube if you're watching this on YouTube it'll probably get served under this That would be cool.

That would be pretty cool. That would be great. And thanks again. Oh my God. Thank you so much for having me. Working it out because it's not done. Working it out. That's going to do it for another episode of Working It Out.

You can follow Emmy Blotnik on Instagram at Emmy Blotnick. You can watch her special What's Her Secret on YouTube for free. It's fantastic. Check out Burbigs.com. Just sign up for the mailing us to be the first to know about my upcoming shows. Our producers of Working Out are myself along with Peter Salmo and Joseph. for Bigelian, Mabel Lewis, and Gary Simons. Sound mixed by Ben Cruz.

Supervising engineer, Kate Balinski. Special thanks to Jack Antonoff and bleachers for their music. My wife, the poet, J. Hope Stein, and our daughter, Una, who built the original Radio Fort made of pillows. Thanks most of all to you who are listening. If you enjoy the show, rate us and review us on Apple Podcasts. And tell your friends and your enemies, tell the nice folks working at Sephora. Just say, look, we all know this hot people industry is a failing industry.

We know the lotions aren't working. We're not coming in here anymore. We're all stopping together. So you might not see any customers for a while. While you're waiting, I have a podcast recommendation. It's called Mike Brubigley who's working it out. It's where Mike Brubigley talks with other comedians about the creative process, even former Sephora customers, like Emmy Blotnick.

Thanks, everybody. We're working it out. We'll see you next time.