Mind of a Serial Killer - SERIAL KILLER: The Happy Face Killer Pt. 2

Episode Date: July 17, 2025

As his body count grew, Keith Jesperson left more than victims behind—he left smiley face graffiti, taunting letters, and a desperate need for attention. In Part 2, we unravel the psychology behind the Happy Face Killer's sadistic murder spree, his chilling confession, and the moment his own ego brought him down. Killer Minds is a Crime House Original Podcast, powered by PAVE Studios. Listen wherever you get your podcasts. For ad-free listening and early access to episodes, subscribe to Crime House+ on Apple Podcasts. Don’t miss out on all things Killer Minds! Instagram: @killerminds | @Crimehouse TikTok: @Crimehouse Facebook: @crimehousestudios X: @crimehousemedia YouTube: @crimehousestudios To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is Crime House. We've all been in situations where we know we're doing something wrong, but just can't seem to stop ourselves. For most of us, this is usually something pretty harmless, like eating chips when we're on a diet, or engaging in some harmless gossip. But Keith Jesperson's bad habits were far from harmless. From a young age, Keith was compelled to commit violence.

It started with torturing animals, but eventually that wasn't enough. In 1990, when Keith was 34, he sexually assaulted and murdered a woman named Tanya Bennett in Portland, Oregon. Keith was aware that he'd done something horrible, but he also knew he wouldn't be able to stop himself from doing it again. The human mind is powerful. It shapes how we think, feel, love, and hate. But sometimes it drives people to commit the unthinkable. This is Killer Minds, a Crime House original.

I'm Vanessa Richardson. And I'm Dr. Tristan Ingalls. Every Monday and Thursday we uncover the darkest minds in history, analyzing what makes a killer. Crime House is made possible by you. Please rate, review, and follow Killer Minds. To enhance your listening experience with ad-free early access to each two-part series and bonus content, subscribe to Crime House Plus on Apple Podcasts. A warning, this episode contains discussions of sexual assault and murder. Listener discretion is advised. Today we conclude our deep dive on Keith Hunter Jesperson,

otherwise known as the Happy Face Killer. In the early 1990s, he committed a string of brutal murders across the United States using his job as a long-haul trucker as the perfect cover. Along the way, he left behind a trail of bodies and Happy Faces scrawled in truck stop bathrooms. And as Vanessa takes you through the story, I'll be talking about things like why some serial killers want publicity, what drives sadistic behavior, and how even serial killers often wrestle with their moral compass. And as always, we'll be asking the question, what makes a killer?

What makes a killer? In early 1991, 34-year-old Keith Hunter Jesperson found himself in a strange situation. On January 21st, he'd murdered a young woman named Tanya Bennett and dumped her body near the Columbia River Gorge outside of Portland, Oregon. Tanya had been discovered the following day, and a few days after that, Keith read an article saying someone else had confessed to the crime. It was someone Keith had never even heard of before, a sweet-faced 57-year-old grandmother named Laverne Pavlenac. She claimed she'd helped her boyfriend, 39-year-old John Sosnowski, sexually assault and kill Tanya, then dump her body.

To prove it, she even had the fly she claimed had been cut from Tanya's jeans. Keith didn't understand why this random woman was taking credit for his murder, and he wasn't the only one. The police were skeptical as well. There were inconsistencies in Laverne's story, and the fly she had didn't actually match the jeans Tanya had been wearing. But Laverne was adamant, and she seemed to know a lot of things that only the killer would, like where Tanya's body had been hidden. So despite the misgivings law enforcement might have had, she and her boyfriend were taken into custody and charged with Tanya's murder. Meanwhile, Tanya's real killer remained free, and Keith couldn't wait to kill again.

So the fact that he wants to kill again while someone else is being blamed definitely tells us a lot. If he were genuinely remorseful or even concerned about that, you'd expect to see avoidance behavior, like withdrawal, self-punishment even, maybe even a confession. Based on what you described, especially after Tanya's body was found, Keith was experiencing some anxiety, but to be clear, it's not anxiety over what he'd done, but rather fear of exposure.

That's a very common reaction among violent offenders, especially those with antisocial traits. They're not upset because they've caused suffering, they're upset because they might face consequences. Also remember that for someone like Keith who's driven by fantasy, compulsion, They're not upset because they've caused suffering, they're upset because they might face consequences. Also remember that for someone like Keith who's driven by fantasy, compulsion, and sadistic gratification, the first murder may have been shocking in intensity, but it was also addicting and intoxicating.

Once the fear of getting caught starts to fade, what returns is that craving. The urge doesn't go away. If anything, it intensifies because now he knows what the fantasy feels like when it's real. Why do serial killers have such a strong drive to kill? They'll literally risk everything in their life to commit murder. Is it kind of like an addiction or is it something more primal? Well, the short answer is it's both an addiction but also something more primal.

So for many serial killers, especially those who are fantasy driven like Keith, the short answer is it's both an addiction but also something more primal. So for many serial killers, especially those who are fantasy-driven like Keith, the act of killing just isn't about violence alone. It's about control, release, domination, and identity. It delivers a rush that's intense emotionally, psychologically, even sexually for him, and it becomes the only thing that truly makes him feel alive. Neurologically, in someone like Keith, killing can activate the brain's reward system, the same system that gets activated with drugs, gambling, or sex.

That system or pathway gets flooded with dopamine, which is the pleasure neurotransmitter causing them to crave it more. Over time, the urge dominates their thoughts, much like addiction does. Now, while it can be like an addiction, it's also much more primal too. For some offenders, the urge taps into aggression circuits tied to dominance, territory, and survival. And in someone like Keith,

with antisocial and sadistic traits, that aggression is very distorted. The need to kill becomes existential, especially in the case of Keith, who is now identifying with this particular side of himself. It's become who he is. And once their fantasy becomes actualized, many serial killers have reported that everything else loses meaning. Or, more importantly, this is the only thing that is meaningful to them. It's how they feel powerful, it's how they identify, and it's how they regulate their emotions,

which we outlined in episode one. Whatever was driving Keith's urge to kill, he was ready to do it again by March of 1991, just two months after murdering Tanya Bennett. But he wanted a situation he could control, so he decided to go after his ex-girlfriend, a woman he'd met at a truck stop named Nancy. But when he went to her house in Rogue River, Oregon, it was empty.

Keith asked around town and found out she was dead. It turned out Nancy had already been murdered by another ex-boyfriend. Keith was annoyed. He remembers thinking, quote, what a bummer. I might have killed Nancy myself if she'd been home. This really showcases how calloused he is. He decided to vent his frustration by going for a long drive. Keith was a long haul trucker who spent most of his life on the road, sometimes driving hundreds of miles a day. He always felt better when he was on the move. So Keith left Rogue River and drove for several hours south to Shasta, California, where he

stopped at a shopping center for dinner. In the parking lot, he met a woman we'll call Barbara. According to Keith, when he first saw her, she was breastfeeding her baby while swigging from a bottle of Jack Daniels. They got to talking, and before long, Keith bought them a case of beer to share. Barbara got into Keith's car with her child, and Keith drove them all out to the countryside. They stopped at a scenic lookout beside a quiet road. Then, according to Keith, they started to have consensual sex. But Barbara stopped him.

She admitted that she was married. She'd only agreed to get with Keith because she was having a fight with her husband. But now she was having second thoughts. Keith didn't listen, though. He began sexually assaulting Barbara. When she screamed, he put her in a headlock and tried to break her neck. However, when her baby started crying, he let go. Keith realized that if he killed Barbara, he'd have to kill her baby too.

And that was a moral line even he wouldn't cross. So he drove Barbara back to the shopping center and let them both go. But she wasn't going to let him get away that easily. A few hours after this incident, Keith was at a truck stop when he was swarmed by police. It seems Barbara had called 911 and reported Keith for sexual assault and attempted murder. When the officers questioned Keith, he admitted to having sex with Barbara, but denied that it was non-consensual or that he'd tried to kill her. He said that Barbara probably made up the story because she felt bad about cheating on her husband.

The police took Keith at his word and let him go. Keith couldn't believe his luck. First, he'd gotten away with Tonya Bennett's murder, and now this. He felt invincible, like he could even confess in public and get away with it. So a few weeks later, he decided to do just that. It was January, 1991, and 35-year-old Keith was coming home from a trucking run. While taking a pit stop at a Greyhound station in Livingston, Montana, he pulled out a pen

and scrawled a chilling note on the door of a bathroom stall. He wrote, quote, I killed Tonya Bennet January 21st, 1990 in Portland, Oregon. I beat her to death, raped her, and loved it. Yes, I'm sick, but I enjoy myself too. People took the blame, and I'm free." Keith was feeling so good about himself, he signed the note with a little happy face. Let's talk about why he felt compelled to do this,

because there are a few motivations for this. I mean, primarily it's a way to control the narrative and manipulate the public in a form of power play. And I think because he's been feeling invincible, he's particularly interested in maintaining that thrill. And this is certainly one way of doing that. It's also about ego or narcissism. Many serial killers, especially those who are sadistic

or psychopathic, have an inflated sense of self. They want recognition, even if it's anonymous. The Zodiac, for example, sent taunting letters to newspapers. BTK labeled his own crimes. It's about legacy. They want their crimes to mean something. It's also about compulsion and fantasy. And for some, the confession, even if it's anonymous, is an extension of the

thrill and part of their fantasy loop, because it reactivates the memory of the crimes, lets them relive it and all within their control. As well as, it's just really a moral disengagement because this is not about guilt, it's not a cry for help, it's about declaring pride. And if we recall from episode one, Keith finally began to integrate his good and bad sides and started to identify with who he truly is, and now he is declaring it. Well, while he waited to see if anyone would notice

his bathroom stall confession, Keith took some time off from killing. But he needed an outlet for his violent urges, so he started doing crazy things like driving across the country non-stop, chugging coffee and taking caffeine pills to stay awake. Still, no matter how hard he tried to distract himself, Keith just couldn't stop thinking about killing again. And in the summer of 1992, two and a half years after killing Tanya Bennett, Keith couldn't hold himself back any longer.

On August 30th, the 37-year-old was working on his truck at a brake check area off the highway near San Bernardino, California, when a young woman, supposedly named Claudia, walked up and asked for a ride. As soon as he saw her, Keith says he thought, quote, My God, this is the one. They got into Keith's truck and drove for a while. When they stopped for a break, Keith leaned in to kiss Claudia. She told him if he wanted sex, he'd have to pay. Keith didn't like that. He sexually assaulted her, then restrained Claudia in the truck's sleeper before getting

back on the road. The next time he pulled over, Keith started playing what he called the death game. He strangled Claudia until she passed out, then waited for her to wake up before strangling her into unconsciousness again. He did this until eventually she stopped waking up at all. After carrying out this sadistic murder, Keith says he went into the truck stop and enjoyed an iced tea. Let's break down this death game as he calls it. At its core, what he did to Claudia was about power and control. He wasn't rushing to end her life.

He was actually savoring the process. It is an ultimate expression of sadism and it gave him a godlike sense of authority. But to play this game, Keith had to be completely emotionally detached and his ability to repeatedly strangle her like this shows just how desensitized and emotionally disconnected he truly was. This is extremely common in offenders with psychopathic traits. He's also achieved a physiological arousal from this, not just sexually, but psychologically as well, which of course is at the core of sadism. He was extending her torture and subsequently the thrill, allowing him to relive it multiple times.

Then he goes and he gets a nice tea. This not only shows how calloused he is, but how fully integrated violence has become in his life. To him, it was as routine as a day of work, and the iced tea was his way of relaxing after a long day. Why do some people take pleasure from inflicting pain and suffering on others? Is it a brain disorder, or can anyone become sadistic like that? So we know from both research and real world cases that sadism does exist on a spectrum. But is it a brain disorder? In extreme cases, yes. Research has shown that there are structural brain abnormalities associated with individuals who have antisocial personality or psychopathy and sadism can be a part of that. Neuroimaging of people with antisocial personality or psychopathy and sadism can be a part of that.

Neuroimaging of people with antisocial traits shows an overactive reward system when exposed to aggressive or violent stimuli, while the prefrontal cortex, which helps regulate empathy and judgment, shows to be underactive or even underdeveloped. So in some individuals, the brain quite literally finds suffering pleasurable. But can anyone just become sadistic? Well, it's a little more complicated to answer, but the average person is not likely to become sadistic in the clinical sense. But under the right circumstances, which generally are dehumanization, prolonged abuse, group

think or power without accountability, people can take pleasure in cruelty. We've seen this in military settings, law enforcement settings, cults, and even the famous Stanford Prison Experiment. Once Keith's twisted death game ended, he left Claudia's body in a desert canyon east of Palm Springs covered in brush. Unlike his first murder, Keith didn't feel any guilt. body in a desert canyon east of Palm Springs, covered in brush.

Unlike his first murder, Keith didn't feel any guilt. He felt free. He loved every moment of it, how easy it was for him to do. And now that he had a taste for murder, he was ready for more. On August 30, 1992, 37-year-old Keith Jesperson killed a young woman known only as Claudia. The murder was drawn out and sadistic, and once Claudia was dead, he hid her body out in the desert. After that, Keith was eager to kill again, and about a month later, he struck once more. One night in September, Keith was sleeping in his big rig at a rest

stop near Turlock, California. Around midnight, he was awoken by a knock on the cab. A blonde woman in a red sweater was standing outside. She asked Keith if he wanted to party. Keith was tired, so he told her to go away. But the woman insisted. She opened the door and climbed into the truck, which Keith did not appreciate. Before the woman could even explain what she was doing, he grabbed her by the throat, slammed her onto his bed, and strangled her to death. He'd killed her so quickly he didn't even know her name. Once it was over, Keith was frustrated with himself. He wished he'd taken more time with this murder, like he'd done with Claudia. After dropping her body behind a roadside diner, he vowed to be more methodical the

next time he killed someone. It wasn't long before he got his chance. Just two months later, in November 1992, Keith was on the road near Salem, Oregon, when he decided to visit a sex worker he'd hired a few times named Laurie. Laurie met Keith at his truck, and the two of them had sex in his sleeper cab for about an hour. But Keith says when they finished, Laurie demanded double her usual payment.

Keith had already been thinking about murdering her, and this apparently gave him enough of an excuse to do it. As he began choking her, Keith says he told her quote, your number four. And this time he controlled himself enough to play his sadistic death game. When it was over, Keith hid her body under some vines on the edge of an empty truck lot, then drove off into the night. Keith had now killed four women in the past four months, and he still didn't feel any remorse. He knew the only way he'd ever quit killing was if he quit trucking. But he didn't know if he even wanted to stop.

In a later interview, he said, quote, I didn't know my own mind. I guess I never had. At work, I hear things like this all the time. Offenders will say things like, it just happened, or I wasn't really thinking. And most of the time they know very well that they are responsible, but they just seem to lack insight into why they did what they did. And there are a few reasons why that is. Some actions are purely impulsive.

They're driven by momentary emotion or physiological arousal, while others are more calculated. But even premeditated actions can be shaped by unconscious motivations like unresolved trauma, rage, shame, or fantasies that they don't fully understand. And with that lack of insight, there is often also very limited self-awareness, and Keith's statement really shows that. He never developed the tools to recognize or regulate what was happening internally and I think that's obvious when we consider what his father's personality

was like. This is common in people with early trauma or personality disorders. They feel urges but they can't fully articulate what's driving them. Well, Keith wasn't focusing on why he was committing his murders. He just knew he wanted to kill. And in March 1993, just four months after murdering Lori, the 37-year-old pulled into a busy truck stop diner near Corning, California. As he was having coffee, he spotted a young woman who appeared to be unhoused. She was sitting at the counter alone.

Something about her made that familiar urge return. He'd found his next victim. Keith bought the young woman a meal and they struck up a conversation. According to Keith, she said her name was Cindy, though later it would turn out her real name was Patricia Skipple. Either way, when she learned he was a trucker, she asked Keith if she could get a ride to Sacramento where she wanted to visit her sister. Keith said, sure thing.

He drove them along for a while, then eventually pulled off at a rest area near the small town of Williams, California. After they'd both freshened up in the bathroom, Keith says they went back to his truck and had consensual sex. Afterward, he decided it was time to play the death game. Once she was dead, he left Patricia's body behind some rocks next to a desolate stretch of desert highway and drove off. Although Keith enjoyed killing, he knew on a basic level that it was wrong.

He didn't necessarily want to stop, but he figured he'd try. And shockingly, it worked. Following Patricia's murder, Keith managed to avoid killing for over a year. Not only that, he found love. Sometime in early 1994, Keith was at a truck stop in Troutdale, Oregon, when a woman caught his eye. Her name was Julie Winningham, and Keith thought she looked like a cute actress he'd seen on TV.

She was sitting with her back to him in the diner, so he hit on her by saying, quote, Now there's a back I'd like to rub. Julie laughed and asked him to sit with her. To Keith's surprise, he liked Julie a lot. She was charming and funny, knew all about trucks, and best of all, she seemed to actually like him back. They ended up sitting and talking for about two hours straight. Finally, Keith asked Julie if she would like to join him on his trucking

route for a while. Julie happily agreed. Keith was smitten. He liked Julie so much, he even promised himself he wouldn't kill her. They started spending a lot of time together while Keith was on the road. He even introduced Julie to his old friends who we'll call Joe and Georgia, a couple of swingers Keith had once been romantically involved with himself. Julie got along with Joe and Georgia so well she ended up moving in with them. But the good times didn't last. Keith and Julie eventually started to argue. She liked to smoke marijuana, but Keith hated drugs of any kind, and money was always an issue.

Finally, Keith began to suspect Julie was sleeping with Joe and broke up with her in early 1994. It had been a rare, happy time in Keith's life, a time when his urge to murder had been kept at bay. But now, the good times were over. And this is an example of what I talked about in episode one, that most serial killers can exercise constraint and impulse when it serves them.

And Julie was serving him. She provided him with something he rarely experienced, and that was emotional connection and routine. When someone like Keith is getting their needs met through companionship, sex, or stability, the drive to act out violently can temporarily subside. It's not that the urge disappears, it's just temporarily managed and serving as a replacement like I talked again about in episode one. But also, he likely saw her as valuable.

People like Keith are often highly selective about who they view as quote, worthy of empathy, even if that empathy is superficial. The reality is, this wasn't a moment of rehabilitation. It was just a moment of containment and distraction. Keith had some weird moral lines. He was okay with sexual assault and murder, but he hated marijuana. Why is it that someone can sometimes be okay with horrific behavior and then be completely offended by minor pet peeves?

Yeah, he did have some weird moral lines because he even hated the idea of harming Barbara because of her child, too. Like he drew a line there. So people like Keith, especially those with personality disorders, are very rigid thinking patterns, often develop selective morality, which is deeply held rules or values that don't actually align with any consistent ethical system. And actually, I've seen this when I'm working with incarcerated populations. Many justify their crime. Let's say it's murder, and they justify it by saying, well, at least it wasn't a child. Or, yeah, I sold them drugs, but they didn't have to buy it. When the reality is they might have killed someone who had a child or sold drugs to a parent, which in the ripple effect of

crime still impacted a child in the end. So that selective morality is a little bit distorted, but they engage in this selective morality within the prison system to maintain social hierarchy and status, identity, and self-preservation. And the same is true for Keith. This assertion is superficial, and it's a false moral anchor to give him the illusion he has something redeemable or even human about him. And it's his version of self-preservation, and it's something he has been doing since he was

young. Well, after breaking up with Julie, 39-year-old Keith was feeling lonely and depressed. And his mood got even worse when he came across an article about Laverne Pavlenac and John Ceznowski. They'd been convicted of murdering Keith's first victim, Tonya Bennett, and were now serving time for it. Although Keith was glad to be a free man, he hated that Laverne and John were getting credit for his murder. He'd even written a confession in a public bathroom, and nothing had happened.

Keith felt overlooked and ignored, just like when he was a kid. So he decided to write a letter to the largest newspaper in the Pacific Northwest, the Oregonian. On a pale blue sheet of paper, he wrote, quote, I would like to tell my story. I am a good person at times. I always wanted to be liked. I have been married and divorced with children. I have always wanted to be noticed.

So I started something I don't know how to stop." Keats' letter went on to describe his murder of Tanya Bennett in detail, including specific details about where he left the body. He concluded the letter with, quote, I felt real bad and afraid that I would be caught. But a man and a woman got blamed for it. She was my first, and I thought I would not do it again, but I was wrong." Just like in his bathroom stall message, Keith signed his letter with a happy face. Over the next few weeks, Keith read the Oregonian every day, looking for any reference to his

letter, but they never mentioned it. Annoyed, he sent them another letter. This one described his most recent murder of Patricia Skipple in Corning, California. He figured if the Oregon police weren't going to start investigating his murders, maybe the Californian authorities would. Still, nothing came of it. Although a few publications were putting the pieces together, it wasn't major news. Keith was frustrated. He wanted the public to know that the happy face serial killer was on the loose, but no one seemed to care.

Keith didn't lash out though. Instead he turned his focus inward. Although he still caused chaos by lighting fires and running other cars off the road, he was working hard to contain his desire to kill. Keith even read up on other serial killers to try and understand himself. He also made an effort to reconnect with his children, who were living in Washington State with his ex-wife Rose. All things considered, things were looking up.

But the whole time, Keith's bloodlust continued to fester. And this time, he couldn't stop himself. In September 1994, Keith was at a truck stop in Tampa, Florida, when he met a young woman traveling alone. She told him her name was Susanna. According to Keith, she was carrying tarot cards and tree bark with her. He wondered if she was a fortune teller. She told Keith she was heading to Lake Tahoe, Nevada.

Keith was headed that way and was happy to give her a ride. They drove all night along the Florida panhandle, then finally pulled off the highway to catch some shut-eye around 3 a.m. Susanna agreed to share the sleeper cab with Keith as long as nothing else happened. Keith says he complied with her request, at first. But after a while, he became aroused and started to sexually assault Susanna. She screamed out, and Keith panicked. He was afraid someone might hear her.

Acting on instinct, he quickly choked her to death. Keith hid Susanna's body in some brush beside the highway. As a sort of signature, he put two white plastic ties around her neck. When a serial killer marks a victim, like Keith did by placing the white plastic ties around Susanna's neck, it's about ownership and control and identity.

Keith has become increasingly frustrated with the fact that his crimes have not yet been recognized publicly no matter how many attempts he made. And in response to that, this was his way of claiming the act and stamping it with a signature. Keith wants recognition. He wants that recognition to be clear and unmistakable so that no one can take the credit for his crimes except him.

And he wants full ownership of his crimes. Well, one thing was for sure. Keith was back in what he called his killing mode. And he didn't wait long before committing his next murder. In January 1995, a truck dispatcher put 39-year-old Keith in touch with a woman named Angela, who lived in Spokane, Washington. She was looking for a ride to a town near Denver.

Keith was heading in that direction, so he agreed to take her. At first, the trip went well. He drove Angela toward Denver over several days, stopping to have dinner at one point with a friend of his. But by the time they reached Wyoming, Angela was starting to get on Keith's nerves. He got even more annoyed with her when she changed her plans and asked him to drive her further east to Indianapolis instead, where she wanted a rendezvous with her ex-boyfriend.

At that point, Keith's rage boiled over. He pulled over at a rest stop in Nebraska and attacked Angela. Like with so many of his other victims, he sexually assaulted her, then choked her to death. But this time, Keith couldn't just drop her on the side of the road somewhere. A lot of people had seen them together. If someone found Angela's body, it would be easy to pin the murder on Keith. So he decided he needed to make Angela impossible to identify. In order to do that, he fastened her to the underside of his truck.

By the time he pulled over, 12 miles later, the remains were unidentifiable. He hauled what was left into the Nebraska prairie and disposed of it in some tall grass. And this is yet another truly horrific example of how emotionally detached and calloused he is from just human connection of any kind. Definitely. Well, his plan worked. The authorities didn't catch on to him, and Keith was free to continue his reign of terror along America's highways.

And his next victim would be someone he loved. Stop. victim would be someone he loved. It's on sale now, August 1st. In early 1995, 39-year-old Keith Jesperson was feeling unhinged. He'd killed seven women over the past five years, and despite his attempts to anonymously take credit for the murders, the authorities weren't on to him at all. On a deeper level, Keith knew what he did was wrong. He thought about dying by suicide so his children would never know their father was a serial killer. Keith wasn't ready to intentionally end his life, but he started acting without any

concern for his safety, doing things like driving his truck without his lights on for miles at a time. But Keith's reckless abandon had the opposite effect. It made him feel alive, and a chance encounter in March of 1995 energized him even more. One morning that month, Keith was at a truck stop in Troutdale, Oregon, when he ran into his ex-girlfriend, Julie Winningham. He hadn't seen her since their breakup about a year earlier, and Keith wasn't sure if he wanted to get involved with Julie again, but in the end, he couldn't help himself. He went up to Julie, and she seemed eager to get back with him too.

Not only did they spend the night together, but at the end of it, Keith claims Julie asked him to marry her, and he said yes. But the whirlwind romance petered out quickly. Keith says that within a few days of reconnecting, he and Julie were back to fighting about the same issues they'd had before – her drug use and money. On March 10, 1995, the fifth night of their new relationship, Keith was about to go to sleep in his truck when Julie came in, smelling like marijuana. It set off a huge argument, and Keith was overwhelmed with rage.

Before he'd promised himself he'd never hurt Julie, but things were different now. Keith attacked Julie, sexually assaulting her and playing his so-called death game where he'd repeatedly strangle his victims into unconsciousness until they died. Before Julie drew her last breath, Keith says he told her, quote, your number eight. Afterward, Keith dumped Julie's body on the Washington state side of the Columbia River Gorge, just across the river from where he left his first victim, Tanya Bennett, five years earlier. Keith accepted that Julie would be his final victim.

Too many people had seen them together. It would take long for the police to find him now. In a way, it's what Keith seemed to want. Yeah, Keith is not hiding anymore. He's made that very clear. And circling back to where he disposed of his first victim is almost like bookending his story because he wants his legacy to be known. Now, it's not typical for serial killers to want to be caught, but in Keith's case,

I think he wants a legacy more than anything, and because his attempts until now to gain the recognition he craves have not worked, getting caught would finally allow for that, and it would be on his terms. At the same time, Keith fears accountability and consequences, because although he has some desire of being caught, he's also not turning himself in either. So he's still in self-preservation mode. He's not trying to escape his crimes, he's trying to frame them.

How does his behavior here compare to someone like the Zodiac Killer, who also sent letters to the police and signed them with a unique symbol? Well, they both definitely made public confessions, and Zodiac was very well known for that. But psychologically, they're actually very different. Keith was more of a classic fantasy-driven sadistic killer whose urge to confess came from a need for recognition

and emotional release. He wasn't highly organized or theatrical like Zodiac. He just couldn't stand the idea of someone else getting credit for his murders. That's why he confessed in pieces, with bathroom stall notes, letters to his brother, and eventually to the police.

He wanted ownership. His happy face signature wasn't part of a grand puzzle. It was his twisted way of branding his acts and reinforcing control. The Zodiac, on the other hand, was all about manipulation, mystery, and power over public fear. He wasn't just seeking credit. He was playing with an audience.

Unlike Keith, Zodiac seemed to thrive not on being caught, but on feeling superior than everyone else. His symbol wasn't just a signature. It was a calculated tool to build up a myth. For Zodiac, murder was only part of the performance. The spectacle was the point, and we get into detail on the Zodiac in our two episodes on him.

But both wanted power and recognition. Keith's confessions were emotional leaks, and the Zodiac's were strategic puzzles. Well, if Keith was hoping to finally get caught, he was about to get his wish. Julie's body was found just a day later. It didn't take them long to connect her to Keith, but they didn't move in on him right away. As a truck driver, it would be hard to track him down.

Instead, they decided to make him come to them. Working with Keith's dispatcher, they lured him to a fairground in New Mexico for a pickup. When Keith arrived at the fairground in mid-March 1995, the lot was empty except for a single worker who directed him to park in a fenced-in area beside a shed. As soon as Keith got out of his truck, police officers stepped out from behind the shed with their guns drawn. They told him he was a person of interest in Julie's murder and took him down to the station for questioning.

This was Keith's chance to come clean about everything, but he denied having anything to do with Julie's death, and he didn't mention his other victims either. The police didn't have any concrete evidence, so they couldn't make a formal arrest just yet. But they had him right where they wanted him. Before Keith left, they took a blood sample to test his DNA. Keith knew it would be a match, but he didn't want to spend the rest of his life in a cell. He decided to die by suicide before the police came for him again.

First though, he wrote a letter to his brother confessing everything. After he sent it, Keith had a change of heart. He decided he wanted to live after all and quote, act like a man for a change. He called the police and told them he was ready to confess. All right, so there's a shift here for Keith. Remember, this is someone who's committed brutal, sadistic murders, but still wants to see himself as a man with a code. Someone who, in his words, could, quote, act like a man for a change. That contradiction is key. Keith wasn't

giving up. He was regaining control. Suicide might have been his first instinct to escape consequences, but ultimately, it's a loss of agency and, more importantly, a loss of narrative. Turning himself in on his own terms allowed him to reclaim that. In his mind, he wasn't being caught. He was choosing to come forward. He's not confessing because he feels the need to be redeemed. He confessed to control the ending, preserve his ego, and finally stop carrying the weight of this double life. It wasn't remorse, it was relief, recognition, and release.

What do you make of him feeling like or saying that this course of action was what a man would do? Yeah, this really speaks to core beliefs that he has about masculinity. For him, being a man was always tied to power and dominance, much like it was for his father. Only now, he's reframing these views as taking responsibility. So this way, turning himself in becomes an act of strength, rather than an act of weakness in his mind, making it more manly.

Remember, he's always maintained this illusion of a moral structure that he never really embodied but rather idealized or used as principles. He's leaning back on that now so that he can end with this illusion of honor. It's another way to maintain control and to preserve his ego, which has always been the motivation. Keith may have been ready to confess, but he still only admitted to Julie's murder. He wanted the opportunity to be a free man again someday, and he knew there was no chance of that if the authorities found out he was a serial killer. But there was just one problem. The letter he'd sent to his brother, where he did confess to all eight murders he'd committed. Keith called his brother and asked him to burn the letter,

but he refused. His brother showed the letter to the police, and Keith knew there was no use denying it any longer. He told them everything, even drawing diagrams to help investigators find his victims' remains. Keith was especially intent on taking credit for Tanya Bennett's murder. The authorities were reluctant to admit that they'd put two innocent people in prison, but when Keith told them where they could find Tanya's purse, they agreed to reopen the case. It wasn't long before Laverne Pavlenak and her boyfriend, John Sosnowski, were released from prison on January 7, 1996.

It turned out John had been abusing Laverne around the time Tanya was killed. After seeing the story about Tanya's murder on the news, Laverne tried to pin it on John as a way to get out of the relationship. She'd been so desperate, she was willing to implicate herself if it meant getting away from him. Thankfully, it seems like John left her alone after they were released. Laverne went on to live the rest of her life in peace until she died in 2003 at the age of 70.

Meanwhile, Keith Jesperson was finally paying for his crimes. Thanks to his confessions, it didn't take long to convict Keith for the murders he'd committed. The 40-year-old was given four consecutive life sentences, which he started serving in 1995. Since then, Keith has given countless interviews and told his story in horrifying detail to many people. Since childhood, Keith had felt overlooked, unlucky, and unloved.

It made him desperate for attention in any form he could get, and this was finally his chance to be in the spotlight. But although the world finally knew him as the happy face killer, it came at a steep price, one that went beyond his prison sentence. As expected, Keith's three children found out he was a serial killer. At least one of them has cut off all contact with him since then. As of this recording, Keith, now 70 years old, remains in his cell, isolated, alone, and unloved. And he'll stay that way until he draws his final breath.

Thanks so much for listening. Come back next time for a deep dive into the mind of another murderer. Killer Minds is a Crime House original powered by PAVE Studios. Here at Crime House, we want to thank each and every one of you for your support. If you like what you heard today, reach out on all social media at Crime House. And don't forget to rate, review, and follow Killer Minds wherever you get your podcasts. Your feedback truly makes a difference. And to enhance your listening experience, subscribe to Crime House Plus on Apple Podcasts. You'll get every episode of Killer Minds ad free along with early

access to each thrilling two part series and exciting bonus content. Killer Minds is hosted by me, Vanessa Richardson and Dr. Tristan Engels and is a Crime House original powered by Pave Studios. This episode was brought to life by the Killer Minds team, Max Cutler, Ron Shapiro, Alex Benedon, Lori Marinelli, Natalie Pertsofsky, Sarah Camp, Dan Merck, Sarah Tardiff, and Carrie Murphy. Thank you for listening.