Miss Me? - Listen Bitch! Call Me By What Name?

Episode Date: April 6, 2026

Miquita Oliver and Jordan Stephens answer your questions about vaginas.Next week, we want to hear your questions about HOARDING. Please send us a voice note on WhatsApp: [phone]. Or, if you like, send us an email: [e-mail] episode contains very strong language and adult themes. Credits: Producer: Natalie Jamieson Technical Producer: Oliver Geraghty Assistant Producer: Caillin McDaid Production Coordinator: Rose Wilcox Executive Producer: Dino Sofos Commissioning Producer for BBC: Jake Williams Commissioners: Dylan Haskins & Lorraine Okuefuna Miss Me? is a Persephonica production for BBC Sounds

This BBC podcast is supported by ads outside the UK. Dive into the bonkers world of David Mitchell and Robert Webb and listen to their BBC comedy show. From nonsensical maths quiz number wang to finding out what James Bond is really like as a party guest. There's something for everyone. Hello, MOTT AAT. Yes, that's right. This is the Ministry of Things that are apparently true.

Yes, we do exist. The rumours are true, ironically. Start listening to that Mitchell and Web sound. the complete series one to five wherever you get your audio books. This episode of Miss Me contains very strong language, adult themes and strong sexual discussions. Not a weak one, a strong one. Welcome to this slightly sensitive episode of Listen Bitch. Yes, vaginas. Yeah, that one, even more sensitive than that.

Sorry. Oh, uh, vaginas. Gently, softer. Vaginas. This is ridiculous. We can't do vaginas and I'm laughing at Jordan saying vaginas. It's ridiculous.

I'm saying it like an Mness advert though. Yeah. All new spring vaginas. Yes. I'm eating a penny sweet because I really needed some sugar because ironically in the episode of vaginas I'm really pretty menstrual

and it's made me really like shaky and diggy. Have you eaten eggs today? No. Should I? Yeah. protein. You're such a good boyfriend.

Do you make eggs for Jade if she's a bit pre-menschion? You're like, you need some protein. No, I recommend eggs every day. I've heard online that it, like, is a really balanced way of beginning your day and, like, energy and hunger and stuff. Same a porridge.

Yeah, I do love eggs. I will have some eggs. I'll have some eggs after we do this. First, let's talk vaginas. Don't you think this Penny Sweet looks a bit like a vagina? I can't see it that well. But probably, I did see someone talking

about like they were saying, oh, you should eat steak before your period. Yeah, because iron is being depleted. Yeah, but then I was with a woman and they were like, I'm in excruciating pain and I had like lurchase of steak. And it didn't help. Yeah. Well, as the man who cured the worst period pains of my life. I didn't.

By proxy. By proxy. I bought the cure. You were in a cape. You flew in with the period of pain drugs and saved my life. Let's talk about vaginas because I feel safe around this. man, let's do this. Great. That's a great co-sign.

I'm actually going to I'm going to put that on my next book. Hi, Jordan and McKee. It's Laurel from Devon. On the subject of vaginas, so I am a mum to two kids, and I think something that's changed in parenting

is that we want to name our private parts with their proper names. My mum called My Vigina My Pee-Pier. So I've been trying to say the right words with my kids, but I still get quite self-conscious in public. Obviously, you don't need to talk about it in public that often. But my kids, they call it their nunny.

One of their mates at schools told that it was their nunny, and they keep calling it their nunny, and I try and correct them when they say it. I was wondering, do you still refer to your penis or your vagina as a nickname that it was given in childhood? And if not, did you have to make a conscious decision to stop doing it? Did it feel weird? Like, how do you feel?

about talking about that in public. And how do you feel about kids saying it? Like, do you think they need to be encouraged more? Okay, thanks. Bye. I love you. What an absolutely smack you around the face and call you, Auntie. Brilliant question.

Yes, that is the question, isn't it? Was it a conscious decision to stop saying for me, personally, my mom said that I called it my body in my body, I would say a lot. Shekina, who does my hair, told me the other day. day that her grandma used to call it your universe. Oh my God. That's dope. As it's the birthing canal, it kind of works.

And you know what it is, Laurel? It's because the alternatives aren't that attractive. And I use the word attractive deeply because I think that our fear that our vaginas are ugly is mirrored by the word. It's a great point. Phonetically, vagina. does not feel sexy. Yeah, or vulva.

Or vulva. But on the other side, dick and cock, it's all like sex tool. But ours just feels like this kind of... Really? Dick and cock, it sounds like sex tool? Yeah. It's like a really common insult. That's true.

There are lots of negative connotations when it comes to sort of colloquial disses. All genitals. Pussy. Yeah, true say. Well, at least we share that. At least we share that gender-wise. So I think that that's it, you know, when we put... this as a topic. Nat was like, oh, I think people might be a bit shy. We haven't had as many

questions as we usually get Keats where you put a story up. And I wrote the themes this week's listen bitch is vaginas and Instagram said there is offensive language in this, but you want to share it anyway. And I was like, yeah. And I was like, oh my God, I can't believe. I didn't say that for me. I think it was about the bitch because you asterixed yours. I do asterix my bitch. I didn't asterix my bitch. And they came for me. But I thought it was about vaginas. But the people that I was working with that day were all women

and everyone was like, God, that's so standard, isn't it? And it's not, it wasn't that. But we are so used to that word being something that no one wants to say. Yeah, I agree. It's not sexy for you either to say like your vagina. Yeah, the fact, like we're not in a context of obviously being a child, but in adult life even, when you want the discussion around genitals to be like arousing or sexual or whatever else, it's like, you know,

you've got a, whatever you say, you have to say, say with chest. Well, speaking of which, I'm going to ask you a bit of a personal question right now. Yeah. What's your favourite word for the vagina? In what context? Sexual. In sexual.

Sexual first. In the context of life, the C word is my favourite because apparently it's one of the only words available for use that doesn't have an etymological tie to a penis. Yes, because as you so beautifully brought up when I did my research, the etymology The epimology of the word vagina is that it comes from the Latin word vagina, meaning sheath or scabbard for a sword. Thank God we didn't get scabbard. Jesus. Yeah. The term was first used in an anatomical sense in scientific Latin in the 17th century, the sort of 1680s, to describe the sexual passage of the female from the vulva to the uterus.

It's nicer than in the 17th century to start actually looking into it a bit. And yeah, so that, so the C word generally, but then I guess vibes y-y-wise. I feel like... Fivesy whites. Do you know what I mean? Like sex talk. I don't... I feel like it's more on a woman to...

Oh, right. I think maybe like the P, like saying pussy is... I know. It is just that one. It's probably the nearest because there's some kind of sexiness to it in a way. I do kind of want to reclaim pussy as a word a bit because obviously it gets used as an insult. It's like one of the first weapons of limitation placed on a boy.

Because it means. week. You know, it's like, it's a punishment. And I feel like, fuck that. You know, I do these word series on my Insta. What's your word series? Oh, I do like a thing, once a week. I do like a little short video just talking about like a phrase or a lyric or...

Etymology of a word. Wow. No, no, not letymology necessarily. Just like an example of when I think that... Words have been powerful? Yeah, yeah. Where like a, you know, I just love words. So it's like when you put them in this particular order, they can have an impact that goes

beyond it, you know? and one of those phrases I do want to talk about but it would feel a shame to not mention it on this but I will also do the word series why do people say grow some balls balls are weak and sensitive if you want to be tough grow of vagina those things can take a pounding

thank you let's have another question my name's Emner I am a sex education teacher from South London I get a lot of questions about vaginas but one of the things that I find that young people find the most interesting is the fact that the vagina has a pH balance of 3.5, which is

extremely acidic, and that's to kill any bacterial growth. So essentially, the vagina's self-cleaning. And I find it fascinating how little people know about the vagina or female anatomy in general. One common question that I get is if someone's pregnant, will the penis poke the baby? But people don't really know about the little thing called the cervix and the fact that the vaginal canal is not a narnia or a gateway into the baby. Abyss. There is a bit of an end point. But what I want to know from you guys is, what is a fact or something fascinating about the vulva or vagina that you guys want to share or can share with us today? Thank you so much. I love your podcast, guys. Bye. I love Miss me listeners.

Yeah, same. What a smart, brilliant woman. Thank you for that. I learned so much. Thank you. I would like to go to her class. Yeah, thanks. Really? I was like, wow, are they learning this in school? Wow. What she said I learned as well because I made the mistake like a lot of my friends of washing my vagina and it's smelling and being really scared and being like

what's going on what's going on. And the point of a vagina is you shouldn't wash it with soap and body wash, etc. Of course with warm water or whatever water but you shouldn't actually put any kind of I don't know what the right word is. Chemicals, fragrances. Chemicals, chemicals. It hates them.

It absolutely hates them. And it cleans itself. I love that. I remember learning that when I was younger and thinking, oh, wow, wow, vaginas are amazing. Yeah, facts. But I don't really, even though Lily and I did the anatomy of the vagina like early miss me just a little,

I am still quite naive and I probably don't know. I mean, I know that there is a vulva and a cervix, but I couldn't tell you where they are. Could you? I feel like doesn't the vagina describe, like technically, I'm sure the vagina describes the insides of the female genitalia and a vulva is actually the description of the...

The vulva is at the front. Flaps or a clip. I think so. Not to me off the vagina. I've done this once before. Didn't they're going to have to do it again? Yeah, so often when we talk about the vagina, we're actually talking about a vulva.

Okay, so your vulva refers to the area surrounding the virginal opening. The vulva is the visible external genitalia lips, clitoris, vaginal opening, while the vagina is the internal muscular canal leading from the vulva to the cervix. Fuck, I'm taking this home with me. This is really...

Oh, I am home. But basically, my knowledge extends as far as, for some reason, there's not a singular word that can encapsulate the entire genitalia. That doesn't have a more specific use. That isn't the C word. It's also wild to me that the C-World is considered like the most dangerous word in the world,

which is just mental. Yes. The other thing that I remember reading about, which I thought is quite fascinating, is that one of the things you have to unlearn as a, well, I had to unlearn. My early understandings of sex, you make a woman have incredible feelings and sensations from penetration, which I later learn is oftentimes like not always the case. And when it is the case, this is what I've led to say.

I'm not sure if this is a fact or whether it's like there's speculation, but the idea of the G spot or like a place that you can like hit and touch. and rub that brings on an orgasm is actually just an extension of the clit anyway. Right. The idea that, you know, ultimately it's clitorial stimulation that provides orgasms and some people can come from penetration and some can't. And I guess it's just, I find it interesting that even the ones who can come from penetration, it's still technically a clitorial stimulation, but they just have, for whatever reason,

whatever, however that particular person's bits are. Wired. Yeah. Or the nerves, they might have, you know, the nerve endings. You know, it's just like, obviously, it's just, I think it's really, it was important for me to understand how much importance is put on the specific sensitivity of that person's clip. Yeah.

And then knowing that how to engage in that at the same time or if, or not at all or whatever. I mean, ultimately, it's about communication, but I just thought it's interesting. Absolutely. Absolutely. It's about communication. Isn't it great to just what we could give to each other with more curiosity? Even if we're just talking pleasure levels. Yeah, the biggest issue of sex, I think, is that like the fear of communicating.

Fear of communicating and lack of education. I don't just mean like, this is a vagina, this is a penis. I mean, what you just said, share your gifts, children. There are actually people online at the moment who have started to speak more about this stuff. I saw a guide over there. I can't remember his name. But he's like a sex educator. And then there's loads of sex workers, female sex workers,

who are doing sex ed and intimacy training. Okay, that's amazing. and consent-based education. Yes, I know you liked that. Our director really wants me to say that the pH level of vagina is the same pH level as wine. Uh-oh.

Turns out I'm not sober. I got a new drug. I just eat pussy. Other people need food to quote the late Mac Miller. I think it's an appropriate time to quote Mac Miller. Yeah.

You know how we were saying, like, wouldn't it be interesting to possibly have like some real experts as part of Listen Bitch sometimes? Oh, fuck, say, my phone's ringing. Hello? Oh hello, I'm so sorry, I'm working right now. Could you call me back in one hour?

Okay. All right, thank you. Not joking. That was my gynecologist. No way. Yeah. What, and they didn't even know? No, why would they know?

You might have been like, hey. Sorry, I know you're doing the vagina episode of this a bitch. That was weird. Yeah, that's really trippy. I love that. What's like the, what's the opposite of that? Oh yeah Are they penis doctors

What's a dick doctor Dictor Dictor Dictor It's outrageous That is just poor Isn't it You can't say

Dick doctor I need a dick doctor Is there one Urologist Yeah Wouldn't it be interesting To have someone Like that wonderful lady

Who is just You know Not only educating Kids in South London About sex But also Educated me In her one

Question Same Like wouldn't it be interesting To be able To talk to her or and dissect her brain and get some fucking answers. I think we should do it.

I think we should add a little expert every now and then to listen, bitch. Yeah, that'd be great. Educate. Dive into the bonkers world of David Mitchell and Robert Webb and listen to their BBC comedy show. From nonsensical maths quiz number wang to finding out what James Bond is really like as a party guest. There's something for everyone.

Hello, MOTT AAT. Yes, that's right. This is the Ministry of Things that are apparently. Apparently true. Yes, we do exist. The rumours are true, ironically. Start listening to that Mitchell and Webb sound, the complete series 1 to 5, wherever you get your audiobooks. Let's have another question on vaginas. Maybe we should call each question a different word for vaginas. Mike? No, I don't think there are that many.

No, I'm scared. I'm scared too. Viginas. Hey, this is Molly. I'm from Sheffield, but I'm currently solo tripping around Portugal. My question is, what is your most embarrassing story about vaginas? My auntie told me this story from when she was younger. In secondary school, often there used to be showers that kids would like go through after pee. And my auntie was super self-conscious because she had not developed as quickly as the other girls. And her pubs were really, really fair so you couldn't see them.

And all the other girls had dark pubs. So she decided to put mascara on her pubs, not realizing it was a blue mascara. So when she ran through the showers, she had a blue vagina and it was streaming down her legs. And from that point onwards, that's what she was known for. What is your most embarrassing story about vaginas? I mean, nothing as bad as that. That's fucking horrible. Vigina trauma. Um

Where shall I spell off? Embarrassing. I mean... This is your idea, by the way. I actually can't do it. I actually can't say what I need to say. I just can't.

Just want listeners to know. Miquita is unable to answer and like what's not. Just an embarrassing story, not the most. No, because it's just something all women will understand. I just don't think I can say it.

I don't know she just said it. What, she knew without you even saying anything? Yeah, man, of course. Wait, what? I was going to go for the F-F, but should we go with the Q? Oh, that's not even that bad. Thank you for saying that as a man. That's really good for me and Natalie to hear.

What, you do our fanny farts? Oh, that's honestly that I really thought it would be so much worse than that. That's normal. Oh, my God. Thank you for saying that, Jordan. Coiffing. if you will. Queefing, if you will.

I was going to say, Fanny Farr. Yeah, that's normal shit, man. Thank you. As a man, tell us, tell us how the queffing

has felt on your side. It's just is what it is, isn't it? It's like, air trapped. It's just not that deep. You're so sweet. I don't know what other dudes

are saying, though, listen, just me generally in life, I really try to avoid, in terms of like, in the muckiness of being a human,

especially something like sex, yes. I'd really go out of my way. even if I felt or thought something to not make that person self-conscious just because it's a horrible thing to experience or put on people. A lot of men I know historically

in moments of feeling disempowered themselves have chosen to project that outwards. It's really nice to hear you say that. I think also, you know, you're so right, I think it's important that we talk about the mess of sex. And it is like the sort of, as I said the other day, the most feral, animalistic, messy thing that we do as humans, right, behind closed doors.

And I think that's why it can be a really easy place to put shame often because there's so much about it that's secretive. But that's the beauty of intimacy, right? The beauty of intimacy is that it is this almost secret between you and another person. What is very difficult in sex is not necessarily messy things happening, but bad reactions to said messy things. And I think that's what I've been through. I've been through a lot of bad reactions in that way. And that's what's traumatized me. not what happened.

But, you know, people are young and, you know, scared. They're scared. That's the best word. That's really it. And I think that, I don't know, for some reason, I always got to say girlmates. It's just like, I don't, they're women. Yeah, you can just say friend. Women.

Women friends. Does that weird. Magial them. But like, yeah, you hear these stories. And sometimes have ex-partners as well. They shared stories of something that someone said to them. It's horrible because, you know, untangling shame sexually is. fucking savage for men and women.

But I think when I hear these stories, because we know or men, I think, engaged so rarely and often like selectively about the bedroom because there is this competitive idea that I think is totally tied to porn and, you know, patriarchy in capitalism and this idea of like domination and being the best and not assuming submissive all this kind of stuff, even though loads of us men love being submissive.

We fucking love it. But like, I think, because, Because say for example with a fanny fight, yeah, like the first thought perhaps to a boy would be that they've done something wrong, you know? And so to control that feeling is like to push it onto someone, you know? To frigate. Whereas me personally, I would much rather, the way I look at it, I'd much rather, but my only goal in terms of, you know, sex is to be relaxed and to let go. Yeah. That's the main goal, right?

So like, why would I want a person trying to desperately control trapped air? It's not going to lead to any form of, I mean, if women can, well, you asked to tell me, I'm sure that's very difficult to reach some kind of climates whilst trying to contain air. Well, when Lil was going through something in her like early 20s where she just wasn't able to orgasm, she's talked about this or miss me. We didn't talk about it that much because we were young. but I just knew that it was something about not being able to let go and surrender in sex because an orgasm is so strange

it's like this conversation between body and mind and the courage to let go I remember a lot of times not having orgasms during sex because I was just too scared to go that extra bit whether it be noisier or move more or do something more for me that my kind of carnal need was and then getting past that barrier in my early 30s and being like, oh my God, I'm fucking free.

In your early 30s? Yeah, like 32. Wow. Big time with this like dickhead loser. But maybe that's why I was free enough to just be like, actually, could you just stay still? Let me just try something out here. And I was like, oh, go a bit further, stay on top longer or do this a bit.

And suddenly I was in like Mecca. I love that someone who didn't feel like you had like some reputation to uphold in front of it. Exactly. I was like, just shut up. Let me just do this. That's facts, though. But I did really fancy him. Yeah, I think that when you get with a new partner, though,

it takes a while to get to that place of surrender and freedom and liberation and multiple orgasm. Yeah, yeah. I think it depends on what the person's gone through, their experience, how they view sex, how open they are as a person. There are some people who just aren't open, you know, which is fine. You know, some people are naturally closed off for various reasons. Mm-hmm. I will say Lily can have an orgasm now anytime she wants.

So it's probably important. With her own vibrator. Yes, exactly. Lily Allen vibrator. Okay, final question? No. Two more. Yeah, yeah.

Hi, Makita and Jordan. My name's Perry. I'm 34 from Hartfordshire. On the topic of vaginas, I sometimes think about that scene in sex and the sea where Carrie gets her diaphragm stuck and Samantha has to help her get it out. And I feel like if my friends ever asked me to do that,

I wouldn't bat an eyelid. I'd be right elbows deep in her vagina helping get it out. It just wouldn't really bother me. And it made me think, like, surely, like, other girls are like this, but mainly for Makita, really, like, if your friend got something stuck in her vagina or whatever, if she had a spot on her vagina or something, would you get in there and help without ever thinking about it?

I'd love to know your thoughts. That's very interesting. Do you know what? I think I would with Phoebe and Namer, but I don't think I would with like Lauren or Lily, which is weird. I didn't even really ever think about that. So maybe it is about a kind of relationship you have with someone.

What does you mean? There's an episode of Sex and the City. Do you know what a diaphragm is? It's quite an old-school type of contraception. Right, right, right, yeah, yeah. And it's kind of like a condom, but like flat in a woman. Yeah. And she gets it stuck.

So her friend's got to like put her hand in and help her. And she's saying like, could you get that intimate with a friend? I think I would be a bit of a prude. I have to be honest. But I think if we're going to talk about sex in the city, talking about vaginas, then we should really talk about this scene that's really important, Jordan, where Charlotte goes to her gynecologist and she says, you have vulvaridinia, which means that your vagina is depressed.

and she's like, okay, I have to take this medicine, my vagina's depressed, whatever. And then she's like, at lunch with the rest of the girls and they're joking. Samadha comes to the table to show everyone these close-up pictures that she's done of herself naked because she's like, I'm a fucking firecracker and I want to remember how good I look. And Charlotte's like, I can see everything because she's an art dealer. So she says, take a look, Charlotte. And Charlotte's like, I don't want to see your vagina that close up. She goes, what's the big deal?

It's just a vagina. And she goes, I've never even seen mine that close up. And Samantha says, you haven't ever looked to yourself with a hand. Mira and Charlotte goes, I think it's ugly. And Samantha says, well, maybe that's why it's depressed. Yeah, facts. Do you know what I'm saying? And I think every woman that saw that episode understood that feeling of the first thing

that you think is it's ugly. And what does that do to who you are as a woman and a human being and et cetera? Like the list will go on of how that will affect your life. So I think we should just start with like, it's a really pretty flower. and it's all yours to do whatever you want with. And so, yeah, I think that the first thing I would think about would I help a friend is I think the part of me scared. Like, what if it's ugly?

Because I think mine's ugly. You know, that's the first thing I think, which is terrifying. Do you want to ask for the final question on this journey through the vagina? Final question, please, about the V-V-V-V-Vaw-Vagina, buvah-w-w-w-w-wab-w pussy. Hey, Jordan, me, Kita. This is Freeman, Brazilian, but living in Sydney. I actually remembered last Christmas Eve where I was with all my girlfriends, and they were showing each other's.

But see, to see, you know, the different anatomy and everything, it was a really interesting experience. But my question is, do you have like a favorite song with vagina as the main subject. I do have a few. I can remember now Doves in the Wind by Cesar and Crenter Kilama. And the other one is Pink by Janelle Monet, great songs. And I definitely think we should sing more about vaginas.

That's my question. I love you guys, love the podcast. Thank you. That's a fucking final question. Listen, bitch, question. That's so good. I don't know Doves in the Wind by Scissor was about the vagina. Can the song be about giving head or can it just be about vaginas?

Yeah, absolutely. What you got? I'd like to put myself forward. Okay. I put out a song called Teach Me about six years ago. Pretty proud of it. That's a hot title. That's high.

already. That's hard. Oh my God, that's so hard. Oh my God, that's actually kind of hot. Yeah.

I'm a fucking sucker for a 90s song that talks about sex. And I think the word pussy comes up quite a lot in a lot of like jodicy.

Mm. All like R&B vibes. Yeah, like big time. I'm sure Kendrick has another song as well that these walls. Isn't that about a vagina? If these walls could talk.

I'm pretty sure it's about a vagina. Is it? Good name if it is. If these walls could talk clever. That's so Kendrick's way of doing a song about a vagina, isn't it? Wait, let me see if it is first. Heart-shaped box, Nirvana.

Nat, you think that's about... Shut up. That, what a banging tune. If that's... Down here, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's a yony metaphor. Kendrick Lamar's these walls. All right, that's a fucking banging way.

With a complex, multi-layered story about revenge, sex and guilt. If these walls could talk. Oh, it's one of three. So the walls are vaginal. walls of a prison cell and walls of a room. So you just both. It's kind of sick. If Harchate Books is about what we now think it might be about.

But we have to give it, obviously, we have to give an honourable shout out to Wop. We have to talk about Wap. Oh shit, yeah. Just because, like, what I love about that is. No, I can't actually with that. I actually cannot with those lyrics. I fucking love Cardi B. And Magdalene is, like, my favourite current, like, theme.

Oh, actually, no. Sims is my favorite. No, what is that line? Grimmie said it to me in lockdown and I put it in a little film I was editing. It was the dirtiest thing I'd ever heard in what? And it was about mac and cheese. Oh yeah, crazy.

What does she say? The fuck knows, man, but Cardi's about that life, bro. Let's get it. Now, that's how we end this. I do a keg or wallets inside, spit in my mouth, look in my eyes. Jeez. You, Cardi, let's go! She knows how to have a Friday night.

Where is it? That's it! I'm talking what, what, that's some wet and gushy, but it's not, it's some wet-ass pussy. Macaroni in a pot, that's some wet-ass pussy. It's not even that dirty. It just visualised something for me and I was like... It's just a constant beating.

I mean, listen, it's a vibe. There's like, like I say, sex is a spectrum, man. Cardi is on... On some next level. In one space on that spectrum, I probably can't, I'll try. Try to occupy that space but you make it killed But what I just love is just like

Fingers up to the prudishness man Like honestly if you'd see in Keith Because I'm like I said I'm like chronically online So I was seeing people respond to the song The Terror They're going This is outrageous

Some of the things are taken off radio The effect this is having on But like listen Yeah look Look else pussy's kind of on the nose No pun intended But like I also was listening To Barbie girl as a child

and the lyrics to Barbie girl are pretty crazy. Well, I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world. Life in plastic, it's fantastic. It's not that bad. Hold on, I'll show you right now. I'm going to read out the lyrics to Barbie girl. Come on Barbie, let's go party. Yeah, it's pretty cool.

Yeah. What do you mean? They're talking about banging. I thought they were going to a house party together. You can brush my hair undress me everywhere. Imagination, life is your creation. Come on Barbie, let's go party. Yeah, but that is porn when you're nine,

and you were probably about seven. I'm a blonde bimbo girl in a fantasy world. Dress me up, make it tight. I'm your dolly. You're my dull, rock and roll, feel the glamour in pink. Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky-panky. I remember that. Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky-panky.

You can touch. You can play. You can play. I would argue Barbie girl is more toxic than what. Because at least with what they're out saying, we're talking about sex, brother. Well, this is it. Like, we're talking about sex. I'm talking about the sex.

I like and you ain't going to stop me. That's them. These lot are going, we're talking about toys. Yeah, exactly. But no, we're actually talking about submission. You're so fucking right. Thank you. Yet again, we've taken the establishment down.

I guess we're done here. What should we talk about next week on next week's list, bitch? Hoarding is a real issue in my life. Oh. I think hoarding. Okay, you know what? Hording. That's it.

You're calling it. Yes, and don't disagree. Yeah, you said vaginas this week. No, I'm with you. I thought vaginas was amazing. What a journey we just went on together. I feel safe around you right now. I just told you really deep things about my vagina.

Yeah, hoarding it is. I'll see you later. Bye. All right, next week's latest in pictures hoarding. Bye. Thanks for listening to Miss Meep. This is a Persefonica production for BBC Sounds. Oh, hello.

I'm Joe Marla, traitor hunter, reader of minds, and completely unqualified. Have you ever wanted to get deep into the heads of celebrities? Ever wanted to see some totally unregulated psychological testing in action? Welcome to my office, where I'll be making famous people uncomfortable in the name of science and light entertainment. Joe Marla will see you now.

That's me, Joe Marla. I'll see you now. Listen now on BBC Sounds. dive into the bonkers world of David Mitchell and Robert Webb and listen to their BBC comedy show from nonsensical maths quiz number wang to finding out what James Bond is really like as a party guest there's something for everyone Hello MOTT AAT

Yes that's right this is the Ministry of Things that are apparently true Yes we do exist the rumours are true ironically Start listening to that Mitchell and Webb sound The Complete Series 1 to 5 wherever you get your audio books