Miss Me? - Pets are Family

Episode Date: September 3, 2026

The painful truth of loving a pet gets explored as Miquita Oliver returns from holiday to join Jordan Stephens for their weekly catch-up. Alongside the pain is the utter soul-soothing balm of having a pet as part of the family. Plus is carnival actually Black Christmas? Jordan and Miquita had parallel Notting Hill carnival experiences this year, as Keets met up with Lily Allen to get immersed in all the joy and release that Bank Holiday vibe can bring (which partly explains the later than usual drop of this ep too!).Get weekly recommendations for things to watch or read or listen to from the Miss Me? Library every Friday at patreon.com/missmeFollow the show on instagram and TikTok @missme.4evaYou can contact Miss Me? on email at [e-mail] Producer: Natalie JamiesonTechnical Producer: Oliver Geraghty Assistant Producer: Katie-Louise BuxtonVideo Editor: Danny PapeProduction Coordinator: Tom JacksonExecutive Producers: Ellie Clifford & Dino SofosMiss Me? is a Persephonica show Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode is brought to you by McVitties Jaffa Cakes. Right. Jordan, it's time. What do you mean? Well, obviously we've debated many things over the years. Many, many subjects have been covered. But now it's finally time to like really talk about whether a Jaffa Cake is a cake or a biscuit. As a cake. I don't feel they are because you find them in the aisle of biscuits.

You keep them in a biscuit tin. That definitely keeps them. in the biscuit family. I think that's just a location-based. That's just idealistic. It's for people to be. People aren't as tapped in as they'd like to be. Ultimately, they're made of a light sponge.

It's a cake. They're called cakes. Yeah, but they are biscuit-shaped. They are biscuit-shaped. They're called cakes, and when they go hard, that's because they're stale, like, a cake. Biscuits go soft. And I guess most importantly, the answer is,

on the box. Jaffa-Cakes. It's a cake, you biscuit. Okay, fine. I think we do give this round to the cake team. But really it's a debate that could go on forever and should. This is the important stuff in life to discuss. Yes. You can find McVitie's Jaffa cakes in all major supermarkets right across the UK. Hello everyone. Welcome to Miss Me. Listen, I'm kicking this off straight away with just pure complaint. I'm in my Larry David era. Oh, I thought you were going to kick it off with how much you might have missed me I did have no this Mekita you know when you haven't seen someone for what is it two weeks And then you see it and you know I've got a backlog babes I have a backlog of stuff to complain catch you up on tried to catch you a carnival but you avoided me but what's a

No we did to see each other at carnival it was really nice to see not in a work capacity for a minute you avoided me because I didn't come to toddler teas bit Yeah, my bit. Well, it was actually, it was a Steve stage. I'm part of the Steve's fan. Well, no, it's wonderful to be home. It's wonderful to be back. As you can tell, I sound like shit.

I am ill. I'm totally ill. I'm back. I'm ill. I'm really miss timed this whole. Yeah, it's all gone really badly. And I have to say the time off was tumultuous to say the least. Great.

That's what we wanted. That's what you wanted to hear. We wanted to hear that the holiday time you desperately, desperately prayed for has resulted in you actually becoming ill. Yeah, ill. But you said something, which I do agree with, which is like, I think when you finally get some time to stop, your body goes, p. Always.

It just didn't realize that I had to get back going in two weeks, i.e. now. But it's okay. It's very real. And I did actually, I did actually miss talking to you. and having somewhere to voice my opinions. This is what I mean. Can you understand why I wanted to begin this with the Larry David era complaints,

like straight from the... It's like, you know, but... Okay, listen, sorry, we should settle in, though. We should settle in. I'm glad you missed complaining. That's good. It's good start. Not complaining, I was just like,

who am I if I don't have the place to talk about how I feel about things? Suddenly, I became quite internal and I'm not used to that because my job is to chat so much shit. So when you're sort of becoming slightly more inverted, it does feel quite strange. Chat and shit privately? No, I sort of didn't talk to me before.

I just slept. I just slept and slept and slept. And as you know, we went through quite a lot. And the time off, I know. No, don't. So basically, so I have my, I've had two weeks off. And in the first week, I actually had a massive shoot. So that didn't feel like really a week off.

And within that week, our family dog, that Jordan knows very well Scout that we've had for 13 years, she got very sick. And then we took her to the vets, and I naively thought that they would tell us what was wrong with her and what medicine to give her. And the next day when I was on sedgeot, someone, a family friend, Lyle,

texts me going so sorry to hear about Scouts. So I was like, fuck, Scouts died. So I called Mum. And she was like, no, no, don't worry. Scout hasn't died. And I was like, okay. And then she went, but we have to put her down in the next 24 hours. I was like, wait, what the fuck?

And this is ridiculous Jordan Scout is 13 years old. Like, your pets do not live forever. Not only do they not live forever. They rarely get past 10 years. But it still just feels completely sudden and unjust and unfair. And Garfield was just, I've never seen him destroyed like that. Like, that's his best, best friend in a way that a human could never be. You know?

I mean, there's no one that understands this more than you. And I don't even want to tell you what it made me feel about Zeddy and Spike and all of our animals. I was just like, ah, they're all going to die. Just unbelievable. Firstly, devastated. I'm so sorry. It's so, it's so hardcore.

And also, I think because these wonderful creatures don't engage in our... sometimes mostly needless human combative warfare that we continually engage in. No, that's a very good point. We do really just have quite a clear-cut love-based, you know? Like, you feed me, you walk me, I love you. It's this very pure thing, right? It's this very pure thing. And Garfield, you know, that's the sound of Scout is what he's missing so much.

And also it was quite interesting because we found. out that she was going to have to be put down, but we just made this decision to bring her home and give her a great last day. And because we suddenly knew she was dying and she, I guess, knew she was dying, she suddenly was just emaciated, couldn't eat. And suddenly it was like, this is very real. No, no, no. This is important as a human being to go shit. Because we were like, we could keep her alive until next week. And then suddenly every hour is your selfishness. right? Suddenly it's up to what you need. Yeah, there's something I really believe in.

Yeah, yeah, it's something I really, it's for... That was really dark. Also, the dog knowing thing, because like, you know that like, um, dogs are just, they just continue, right? That's the thing that's like, sometimes... Do they? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like they can, they can obviously get weak and kind of allow for the natural process to go,

But like, you know, if a dog has an injury, it will carry the injury. You know, you see dogs with three legs all the time. You see, like, they kind of adjust to their scenarios, like, as much as they can. And if they are at that point, they essentially just find a corner and then just, like, curl up. Like, especially if they're on the street. Well, we found out that Scout had been in agony, agony for years. Her kidneys have packed up years ago. That is scary.

This is what I have with Spike as well, Spike. Spike had a little pin and his he has a pin in his hip because I think he before he was taken into a pound in Macedonia he was I think he was hit by a car or something so he has like a little pin in his hip so he's always carried his leg but it's really mad that you say this because after our last episode I went to the Lake District right like that was the thing I just had to go back because I just love the trees and the mountain so much and one of the things I did was well the people are supposed to to hang out with they both had to do other things last minute so i basically like went to this camping shop and asked this guy where he goes camping in the lake district and he just recommended me this spot and i just went right you're so brave and crazy with this shit i was like sleeping on my car so like i i drove to this lay by this beautiful uh place just about like five minutes from a town called ambleside and there was just this pub really cool pub and then this hike and i didn't know anything about it and because I am an insane person.

I woke up the next morning at like seven, six, well, I got woken up by these girls from New Yorkshire. It was really funny. Just like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just like, they pulled up at 5.30 to go hiking on a Saturday, by the way. That's how those, that's how people are built up north, bro. They're built different. Like, five, 30 for a laugh.

Yeah. Like, and then. That's what they're like in Scotland as well. It's a whole different kettle of. And they're just, they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'd actually be asleep since like 9 p.m. I've never had better sleeps than in nature. So I woke up.

I was fine. I got the dogs together and I went to this hike, Makita. Wow. This hike was not easy. I didn't know. I didn't look into it. It was a fucking mountain, right? So it was like about 500 meters up. Wow. Was it a mountain or a really big hill? Probably a big hill, but like it was 750 meters vertically. Wow. Okay. So like so, but it was like and the end of it is nearly a scramble. I have to be careful with Spike anyway because Spike has already got arthritis. He's already got like pain.

He's on painkillers and stuff because he carries his leg and he's like, it's grown a bit. Anyway, look, look, I won't get into the details, but the reason I'm saying this is because Spike is like nine or 10, we actually between us and the adoption agency, don't really know, but he's around that age. So, you know, his breed, his size, only really living

till 13, 14. And I was going up this mountain and I had this like real wave of like, you know, really, I didn't expect it to be so steep and stuff and I really shouldn't be I mean he was loving it to a point you know but I shouldn't be you can't really do that many more hikes I know not vertically you can do you can do you can do horizontally but you know and then Mimi was was she's sick so it's kind of different but I had this real realization that this was like a you know one of like maybe my last experiences of this with him and so I so I just sat on this like mountain basically just crying because I just thought about how much I love him and how much I love him and how much I've been through with him, you know, and like how much I appreciate his presence in my life. This is it. They accompany us through everything for an era of our lives, right? And we get these pets knowing that they'll have short lives. And it's such an interesting lesson in, it's not like even just like pets are a rehearsal for grief. Sure, but it doesn't fucking

feel like a rehearsal. It feels like grief head on. I decided to say goodbye to scout the day before. So she's got this last beautiful day. We couldn't give her all the food she wanted because she couldn't eat. So people coming from all across, you know, Kelly and Z and Leo came in from Vietnam, came to spend the afternoon with her Debs and the family came, Teddy and all the boys, like people came to tell Scout they loved her. Everyone loves this dog. And I decided to say by that day with Phoebe and the kids. These poor kids, Phoebe's kids are 13 and 11. They're not used to facing grief like this. This was, it was interesting to watch them go through that. Yeah. But I've not really, and I, as a 42 year old, I've been very lucky.

My grandma is still alive. I've not really, I've not really had, right? I've not really had to hold something and say goodbye to it knowing I was never going to see it again. And that fucked me up. I was like, no, no, it's always someone else's turn. Do you know what I mean? It's always someone else's dog that's dying or someone else losing a grandparent life. Always go, God, I'm so lucky. And this time it was my turn and I was, it was awful. It's just the, idea that I would never see her again. It's just so much to deal with suddenly. Yeah, of course. It's a family member, 100%. Totally. And then the next day, it was intense because we'd booked these people who had just done Enoch for Teddy, actually, a family

friend's dog who was like 15, and they'd put him to sleep. And she came, and it was a bit like the grim reapers coming to the door. It's like, they're coming at 12. They're coming at 12. It was quite a difficult thing to hold. Anyway, Mom and Goff held her in the garden. and her last breath was with them, with their arms around her, and they said thank you. And we do say thank you for that dog finding us. I do think our pets find us and Scout really found us. You know, we didn't go and look for her.

She came into our lives, quite literally. Yeah, but I actually believed that. Like, that was, Spike was heavily recommended to me by the agency. I actually picked a different dog. Yes, I remember with Spike, yeah. And the dog I picked actually turned up to be a Macedonian mountain dog, so that was a good fucking thing I didn't pick that. There you go. That shit found you. That was not on your wish list.

And I was like, God, you guys really love this dog. Like, why are you? And also, at the side note, black dogs actually get, like, adopted less than other dogs. So I think they were like, you know, encouraging to try and make that happen. I think it's something to do of photographs. I don't know. But like, yeah, he's changed. Obviously, Spike is like, my soul. Well, they change your life. I love Mimi too. Of course, Mimi's gorgeous. Mimi, you know, but it's like, you know, me and Jay got Mimi. Spike, I was just, me and Spike just in lockdown, which was a lot too. I know that you've been through a lot with Spike.

And in a way, it's something that you couldn't go through with a friend. Do you know what I mean? It's like they are, they are you. Quiet passenger, yeah. Quiet passengers, very good, Jordan. That's good. I saw Garfield cry like he hasn't cried since his mom died. It was fucking hardcore.

And then he went to we out here to dance it off because he's crazy. Celebrate, yeah, facts. Yeah, he was like, I'm going to go dance for Scout. I'm going to go Doctor Scout. Yeah, and that was my first week off. So I was quite intense. That's a lot, man. I was like, okay.

I'm sorry. Thank you, babe. And then I went to sleep. That's what I did. And then I went to sleep for about five days. Yeah, it's just a process that. That's a lot to process. Especially if you're not experiencing that.

He was not had to go through the nanos, man. That is, I mean, that defined my whole life. Yeah. I don't have grandfathers, but I wasn't close to them. No, me neither. But my two grandmothers are alive. And in there, my grandmother. Both of them are alive.

Yeah, my Scottish granny, Annie, 93. I can't imagine you feeling that in. And Maria Nanny is turning 90 in December. So I'm fucking lucky. And that's the thing, isn't it? It's like you don't just say bye to your dog. You're not just faced with the loss of a family member and animal pet. You're dealing with that fucking mortality brush.

You're like, oh shit, we're all going to go. And me. And it's just like, oh. Let me just sit with that for a bit. So, you know, there are lessons in it all. And I've held everyone very tightly since it happened. And that's why it was great that we had Carnival afterwards. Because Carnival really is Black Christmas.

It really is, though, isn't it? It actually fucking is. I can't even lie. That is literally. What a great definition. So is. Carnie mass. Saturday, which is the day of Carnival.

This is not a New Hill Carnival that's been going on. for 60 years this year. It was the 60th anniversary. This is, it's got this Christmas Eve energy to it. It's like, how else do you know that summer's coming to a close? Carnival. How else do you all say, hold each other and say, I love you another year together? Carnival, you know? And this year, Garfield, my dad actually had a party on the Saturday and I got to see Jordan. And we haven't seen each other, not for a bloody like a cast press event or recording this in quite a while. I know. Just to be a bit family for a minute.

It was lovely. I'd really miss you. Yeah, it was nice to see the fan. I know. It was a cool little gathering. I'm glad I went actually. Saw Ralph and Jenny, which blew my mind. I know.

Ralph and Jenny. I know. That was like crazy. I'm not seeing them. I've literally not seen Jenny in like 12 years. Just for a reference in case anyone's like, who the fucker Ralph and Jenny. If you've seen Waynes World 2,

Ralph plays... He's so good in it though. Yeah, but Ralph's, no, Ralph is most common. Ralph's, Ralph was in Withlin and I, man. He's a huge actor that's been in many things, but I was so excited when I was a kid, and he was the hippie in Waynes World too. I was just like, it's Uncle Ralph.

He's also in the boat. Is he in the boat that rocked? Yes, that's it. That's shit Richard Kurtz on that Tom's in. It's terrible. Come on. The boat that rocked. It's not terrible.

I thought it was great. He plays the kind of, anyway. And then also, Jenny is wonderful wife. who by the way looks younger every year. Like, I don't know where that painting is in what attic, but they need to make sure that it doesn't get destroyed. I know. It's shocking.

No, it was lovely. It was all the uncles and aunties and all the young lot. What young lot? What's the young lot? Like Flynn and Lexi and all that lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shout out Flynn. Shout out Flynn.

Did you manage to have a proper dance, this carnival? Yes. Yes, I did. Actually, okay, a few things. Firstly, Theo was DJ and of, obviously the family party and I told you in it what happened like I made a joke he won't even remember this but it stayed with me for two hours I made a joke that the drop wasn't coming quick enough in the in the song and then it like immediately like

immediately happened after I said that and then I just looked and thought what is the equivalent of like second hand DJ was it like like like yeah like a backseat DJ a backseat DJ that's a that's a cunty position to hold to the own motive For Miss Me die hard, Theo, you will have experienced cousin Theo DJ because he DJed it missed me live. He did a bloody good job. He said absolutely unbelievably sick. Yeah, he really doesn't need your help. It wasn't help.

I was trying to engage. It was like, ban on, ban on. And then I was like embarrassing for me. Can you DJ? I have DJed. I can't say I can DJ. But you like know how to work decks? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

If I had like a stable, two stable decks and everything was working, it'd be fine. The last DJ gig I was booked on, I literally practiced with Tiff. And I was like, oh, this is quite good. I know what songs are going to war. Like, da, da, da, da, da. When I got to the, when I got to the venue, I was after Donnie Sunshine,

obviously shout at Donny Sunshine each and every time. Best DJ. Like, he's phenomenal. In the Theo mode of ilk, for sure. Both London vets, right? And like, the fucking thing was wobbling. The headphone jack wasn't working properly. Bonnie was mixing by ear through the monitors.

I was like, brav with a DJ gods. What the fuck? I just had to fade in and out, bro, and get the fuck out of there. Kind of sounds like you'll miss me set up. What is going on in your life right now? Tell me about everything. Miquita, this is don't project your shit onto me.

I've said this to you already. Don't project your shit onto me. I'm not projecting my shit. You are, like, for a lot of people, piles make sense. Look, for those listening are not watching, McKita's moaning because I've got piles of jumpers, right? And just for, if you want some more, specificity, the piles began as knitwear. Because for those of you who are aware, if you

hang knitwear, it loses its shape. Am I wrong? Okay. So this is about, am I wrong? Can I hit? Can I hit, no. So this is about keeping on knitware in shape. Yes, you fold knitware. I haven't put it in a cupboard because when cupboard doors close, everything disappears for me. I've told you this. It has to be on show. It has to be on show otherwise it's never, it's not there. It disappears. So, And then these books are books because I like reading. Yeah. And then this is a cup of coffee. Yeah, no, you're doing great and I love the new chair and everything.

Do you actually, I'm not sure if I like the new chair. No, I like the new chair. I like the new chair. It feels like it's giving you the sort of backbone stroke background that really is our new era. I don't know, but can I say, just as a side note, I was bitten seven times by a mosquito last night. I actually was terrorized by a single mosquito. Like, I've been bullied. I've woke up this morning feeling bullied.

I was having audio hallucinations of the sound of a mosquito in my ear. So I just wanted to get that out there. I mean, you saw what happened to me in Sri Lanka. Like, they fucking eat me alive and they do. They torture me. We're not in Sri Lanka. We're in fucking South London. The fuck is happening.

I thought it was a joke. And I looked in the mirror. I was like, am I in like a different unit? Like, is this normal? Like, I was like looking at these swells on my, I think I'm going, oh my God. I think I'm being attacked by like a paranormal. mosquito like the ghost of a mosquito. I'm being, bro, I'm being taken up by a paranormal mosquito, bro.

But you know what I did realize when I woke up the other day, after Carnival, which was... Oh, Carnival, that's what we're talking about. No, but I did realize it really is... The Carnival does that. It sort of closes the chapter, and it has been a fiery summer. Like, let's not even fuck around. It has been...

Like, literally, you mean, like, all the grass is dead. All the grass is dead, and things have broken, and things have been built, and things have fallen apart, things have gone out and things like it's just been so intense and and as we all knew there was a fire horse but we didn't know the actual world would be on fire which is why the horse is a fire horse I just thought there'd be a lot of momentum but actually it's been quite intense so I'm quite happy I was quite happy to turn my Buddhism day by day and see that it was September 1st the other day I was like oh September 1st I think I'm ready for September. Carnival was beautiful like it was on on the

I went again, I didn't see you. But I don't like drinking all day. It doesn't work for me anymore. It doesn't do it for me anymore. I just felt knackered and haggard by it. Well, I mean, there is options to not. What do you mean? Goes gone or not drink all day?

I didn't drink, as you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe. I might just not go. Sober khani, sober khani. I was on the Steeze Factory stage. Shout out my Steece Factory. Yeah, who is there then? Sandblank?

Yeah, actually, weirdly. We did the Stee's in collaboration with Tripping Foot Patrol. Amazing. All set up by Toddler and he's got like a gang, Sheffield gang. And already famous, Delhi, like, there's a whole sick gang that I just like out in force and like Target came through. Like there's loads of a young rappers who have been on Steve's factory who came and rapped, which was dope. Becca Dudley came and did a set. Toddler did a set.

There was some like, oh geez, he got like a, a fucking dawn pen. He got, Toddler got a Dawn pen dub. So he got Dawn Penn singing, uh, no, no, no. It's like, it's the Stiest Factory and you know now. And yes, yes, yes. Nothing Hill Carnival, 2020. Like, it was unbelievable. I think if you, I think it's hard to kind of describe those joyful moments of Carnival if you've never been. Like, I was just talking to the girls that I work with and everyone went to Carnival, not Phoebe, but Beth and Antonio did. And they were both like, it's just quite a lot. And it's like, yeah, Carnival is quite a lot.

But if you allow it to be a lot and sort of get swept up in it, there are moments. What's a lot about it? I think the amount of people. I think I've got some carnival tips and tricks. Go on then. Let's give people a carnival survival guide. Well, firstly, I was on Stee's 12 to 5. I did the opening to the closing.

Well, actually, I left just before it closed. But that was exhausting because you're dancing the whole time. But it was pretty cool to be in one. fixed place. And I know that there were certain pockets. Like, unless you just want to move with a procession, which is, which is a vibe, because it can, it does move, you know, like, it might be a little bit chocker, but it's mainly chocker because people are walking out of the way. If you, you can find side streets, back streets where there's like access to food, access to toilet. In fact, these factory stage, the corner we were on, there were toilets, food and drink all

within, like, yeah, like, within 50 metres. And so people were there for hours. People were there for like two, three hours. And that for me is everything you need from the experience because you're dancing with a sound system. Do you what I'm saying? Yeah, but you don't need to keep moving. You don't have to keep moving. You don't have to keep moving. And also, there are bait stages. And if you're not wanting to like, like, go through the waves, either get to the bait stage at the end or the beginning or just don't go. Like, you don't have to go to rampage every year. You don't have to go to deviation every year. Like, I know, Phoebe is very like, we are not going to fucking deviation. I was like, okay. You don't have to do that.

right then. It's just where all our friends are, but okay. And listen, there was also a dope peak stage that, no mercy stage was dope. Like, so there were loads of cool pockets to go to, but I think it's just about not being afraid to splay out, I guess, because there's always room outside of the sound systems, you know. Yeah, exactly. There's a little moments of discomfort. But I'd say pick a spot and just, and just vibe, man. I love the food. I absolutely luck.

Can I just say, like, Caribbean culture is so, unbelievably wonderful. And the thing that I find so that I love so much about Carnival is that, and I realized this a couple of years ago, is that I think people who don't necessarily understand Caribbean culture or not even in like an ignorant way, like they just don't, you know, just they're not being raised around it or whatever else or maybe they don't live in West or whatever, or maybe they do it or they're just not part of it. I think you get these, people see, because I speak to people outside of this world. You'll see the whining and the dancing and the sound

and the block, you know, how packed it is and they'll think it's like overwhelming, over stimulating. They don't understand the kind of like the dance. They think it's like really over sexual and shit. But like when you're in it, man, this life force, it feels like it's generation of just pure life force energy. And it's like I get like, I'm saying as a sober person. I feel like I'm in an altered state.

Like I feel like I'm in an altered state. almost possessed Orton State. Absolutely. Yeah, because especially when they play, when you're around floats that are playing Soka or playing, like, and you're getting into the rhythms that are written for whining or for that kind of dance. Like, dude, I'm sorry.

It is, it's like, it's transcended. You know, it's, I understand why people can perceive it as something else, but it's transcendent. Well, and also from, this is purely selfish. But for me, it's so special that it's on the streets that I grew up on. Like Powers Terrace, my actual street, is really quite a hotspot carnival, and I couldn't even fucking barely get on it. And Tiff was there. Tiffany Calva was doing her system there.

It was all very glamorous. Yeah, it was all Edward Ennful and Maya Jammer. It was all very famous people. But it was really like, I do walk around. It's so great that it's on streets. It's on these residential streets that are just not alive until these three fucking days every year. And I was just, I felt, because it's the 60th year anniversary, I just thought, I don't know a life where this doesn't happen every time you leave your door in these three days at the end of summer. Like it's so embedded in who I am and where I'm from that I just, there is a connection to it like no other, like nothing other.

And I feel very lucky that I have such a connection with something that is so like globally loved, but actually it just feels like this little thing for me sometimes. And they do that. And also they do. I will say. I know I hate doing the separatist kind of like they thing, but they really do try and paint Carnival to be something that it's not. I saw it at Front Cover of the Times yesterday. Notting Hill Carnival, 73 people arrested. It's like, give it a rest.

Listen, can you know what's, you know what's so dumb? It's that like I actually went on the Monday this time. So for those who don't know, the Sunday is the family day. Monday is the other. Monday evening afternoon when people have been out since the Saturday, that's oftentimes where you get like this kind of straggly, slightly tense atmosphere, perhaps, perhaps. But like, there are millions of people on this street.

Like, and the amount of like stuff that goes down comparative to how many people there are is just like not reflective of the kind of... Like, you see there are moms and dads and families on a Sunday in Pratt. On a Monday. There's a video. It's literally a video from Steve's factory stage in the middle of like literally a grime section of the of, I think it was toddler set. A dad lifts his kid up into air.

I saw that. And start spinning him in that head and everyone's going, yeah. Yeah, I did see that. We'll biving out. But also, let's just be honest when something like Glastonbury is being reported on. Reported on, yeah. Glastonbury has just as many incidents ongoing that are just not spoken about in the press. All festivals do.

Reading and Leeds, all festivals do. And it's just not the story. Until it comes to Carnival, that's the story. It's fucking embarrassing and shameful and they should give it a rest. Yeah. I look, there's like I say, like any congregation of people. And also, you know, if you want there to be less crowded, give us more space. Yeah, we'll take it up to Kensal Rise and down to Warren Park. Yeah, literally give us more space. Like, take over more streets, you say.

Well, they're blocking off, they're literally blocking streets off and making a one-way system around Westbourne Grove. So it's like, you know. No, no, what do they expect? But it was beautiful. It was really nice to, it was really nice to be out in the world. It was a good way to finish my time off. Jordan, you missed Lily at Carnival. Yes, because you didn't. McKee, you were avoiding me. No, no, no. This is the Saturday. Oh, she was at the party. Yeah.

It was so cool. She literally was, obviously, on tour, and then she was, she called me and she was, she'd just been in Kenya for a week. Wow. With, like, Kim and Jonah and everyone on safari. And then she called me, and she was literally in town for one night. So me and Phoebe went to Lily's. Oh, yeah, right.

To get ready for carnival. And it was literally like we were 17. That's so sweet. Yeah, that's fucking sick. Walked down the street all together just me fever and Lil down to where the family party was and it was Honestly I haven't seen her very much this year obviously and it was just really nice because she's so away at the moment and she so didn't want to leave but she had to leave at 5 a.m. the next day she's doing Madison Square Gardens this week and the North America tour so it was really nice What? Sorry, the most beautiful bird

just came straight up to my window and just danced for me. Wait, what birds? I don't know, but it looks a bit like a bird of prey because it's... Of prey? Yeah, because you know birds of prey glide. Yeah, but, Mackey, you're in East London.

What fucking bird of prey is knocking on... Some sort of eagle. An eagle? Well, you know what? I would explain to you more. I would explain to you more, but you will, I will save it for you and our Patreon listeners because I am putting into the library something that pertains to birds.

And I'm getting binoculars and I'm changing my life and I'm becoming a third Twitter. So Patreon will be where I tell that whole story. And I know that there are things from Zawi and Sabrina Elba. How was doing it with Idris Elba's wife, by the way? How is that? Sabrina's great. I absolutely love Sabrina. Sabrina puts on these really cool nights called Sable Labs

and my friend organizes it. So I went down to one last year, I think, and it's like a really cool. She literally gets a bunch of creative people in the room and we all talk and perform and stuff. It was actually dope. And I thought that's that. And then we spoke since then.

I see her at events. I've known it just for longer, but like she's really cool. And like her beauty brands, it's really good. I use it. Literally. I've got an awful skincare routine.

But when I do do a skincare routine, it is using her face serum, which has like this okra and stuff. Oh my god, sharp, opera. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Honestly, when you hear when you hear how she describes, like, um, the, the, the whole kind of development process and then going into one of the most competitive markets in the world.

It's really, it's genuinely interesting. I'd love to talk. I'd love to meet her and talk business. So do you think that she'd be really good to talk about business, by the way? Yeah. Oh, well, talk to her about that because black women are the lowest denominator in getting investment, I think. Really? Yeah. Oh, damn. Well, we're here to break all those traditions and those patterns.

But do you think Idris would do it with me? Do you miss me with me then? Yeah, yeah, if he's free. He's so hard. He's so busy. Yeah, I know he's busy. Because Sabrina was kindly, like, gave some time while she was actually on holiday in New Zealand. But like, with Idris, you know, like, whereas one point when we were supposed to do something in the studio, actually, but he just then got booked on this, like, massive Netflix show and then... Zootropolis 3.

Something like that. He does that one about hijack. Yes. I know it. This is correct. Also he has like five, six,

seven side quests, bro. Like he's like music, film, production studio. You know, he just bought Lelo. No, he didn't.

That's mental. That's what I'm saying. He just bought Lalo for a laugh. Laylo is a club in, in sort of Portobello, elaborate grove. And it's now covered in posters

of Sabrina because it just is not crazy. It's literally in front of relic. where you did your event. With Idris, I think it's the fact that he garnered success so much later. He was in his sort of mid-30s. So I think that he is doing everything that he wanted to do his whole life. He's like, fuck it, I'll do it all now.

Good for him. Yes. But I love that. There's something about him, and we say this in the episode, but it's like he's got a playful spirit. And I think that's a good quality to have for as long as possible. And yeah, I think Sabrina complements that. And also Sabrina, like I say, boss in our own right,

Like she is curious and kind and got a dope company. So there we are. Like the best people. Yeah. And what's our, what's our listen, bitch? Rights of passage is our listen. Okay. Rights of passage.

Righty passageo. Got it. But what, you were about to say something before you were distracted by, I mean, I'm assuming you're not hallucinating, but it wasn't a bird of prey. It couldn't have been a bird of prey. That's wild. Oh, what was I about to say before the bird came?

You were going to say you're doing a happy place, no? Oh yeah. I'm doing Happy Place for Vincotton this weekend. Yes. So dreams do come true. Is it in Manchester? Tatten Park. It's in Tatten Park.

That's exciting. So this is an extension of the big Keats fun. Reunion. What is this? Yeah. This is like some piece up. Ask and you shall receive. I told the world that I wanted to be honest about my terrible behavior.

And I wanted to get closer to my better self. And... But, Makita, did you really... Did you actually say sorry, though? Is that what the comments said? Did she actually say sorry? That's who I told to fuck off in it. I'll did you?

Oh, you're so sweet. You love me so much. But I actually, can I say, it is, I need to be stopped. I actually reply to so many dumb-ass comments. I got this, I don't know if you know this, but last week, yeah, I did... I was done two videos talking about Ali G coming back, right? We started talking about it on this podcast, but I did this. like longer ones on TikTok yeah and the one I posted it's definitely gone outside of my

like chamber because somebody's comments are fucking wild and it's like and I'm so I'm so like you know but you know like you know the mad thing is that like I know the healthy side of me knows yeah that if we're talking about like maturity right emotional maturity one of the key signifiers not need to explain yourself don't need to explain yourself why would Why would I need to explain myself to someone who's committed to misunderstanding me? You know, like, what, why do we do? Why do we do this? That's very good. Why would I explain myself to someone who is committed to misunderstanding? Yeah, that is, that is the, that's where we're supposed to be in life.

Like, like, really and truly, we have to take stock and go, why am I explaining my character? So, for example, with friendship, right, like, I've made, I vow to myself that I'm not going to, that I'm not going to be pitching myself to a person. I shouldn't need to to put someone who loves me because that I, in my, in my world, that love involves grace, right? So even if I do mess up or say something wrong, I would expect either to be told that I've done that or like, you know, someone's gone, you know, maybe I speak to me tomorrow or something. You know what I mean? Like there's like, I don't expect to be like totally like a big baby. But everyone I think deserves grace. Anyway, why am I saying this? My point is online when I see these comments. It takes me such little time to respond, right? Because it's like I enjoy the combative nature of it. It's like a dopamine thing. Well, I think you see it as another form of discourse, which is your greatest drug. Dude.

And then what's so wild is on this Allie G one, because I'm like talking about what a lot of people seem to be like, it's a comedy, what's your problem? They're now, they're trying to straw man me or gaslight me or however you want to talk it. Their whole angle now, I say they, there's kind of this weird, weird wave of people who are trying to project onto me. And they go, they keep going, Jordan, you really need to enjoy life. Like, why are you searching? Why are you searching for things to be offended by?

It's a comedy film. Why don't you enjoy life? And I've gone, this video has taken me five minutes. I've not even edited the videos, by the way. I've just done one take. I've not even put captions. I'll just press record five minutes and I'm out. And these comments, bang, bang, I'm out.

Like, and I'm getting it ironically. But you're not out. No, but I mean, as in bang, I'm replying. It's not like I'm necessarily, unless it was like a proper decent back and forth. You know, I might have a little think. But I mean, the idea that that's what they're, there it's a projection right because they are obviously offended by me discussing something so they say to me just go outside man enjoy life i love but i what do i say keeps yeah but it's like i love hiking i just

got back from the late district i was like i've just been outside for a whole that's why is mutually like mutually exclusive welcome to all of me okay i can do both guys i literally i'm hike and find this problem. I can hike and complain. I like, you know, one minute, one minute, I'm Bill Oddy, the other minute, I'm Larry David. There you go. I'm vibes in. Wow, that's such a great combination. David Attenborough and, well, I was going to compare myself to, um, oh, who's that amazing comedian? No, Bill Hicks or something, but like, I'm not Bill Hicks level. Yeah. But like, but I'm just saying in terms of the energy towards like looking into the fabric of society and finding things, you know, to just like, just unthreat. It's just a little onthread. Just keep

He don't like it. Just little unfread. Just don't keep getting all those like big fucking conversation numbers, not at Miss Me Towers. Like keep that for Miss Me. I'm trying to, I tried to, I missed me. What's the comment you saw, by the way? You're gonna read something out. I wanted to see that.

It was something like, he will never take off a day from something else like. This is about me. Just me. Never has a day off from his need to be something. And I was like, that's quite funny. Need to be what? How deep does that get? I don't know.

No, it was like... I'm projecting my desire for to be seen. Right. It wasn't right. It was like righteous. Anyway, so how are you feeling about this conversation on the weekend? With fun. Yeah.

I think it'll be really good. What I really liked is that when that clip went out and people, so many people responded to it with so many different opinions, it really took it away from like, this is a conversation about being famous and what it's like when two women are, it's not, it wasn't about that. It was about women and the way we are so often kind of... Pitied against each other. Yes, and cajoled into treating each other a certain way.

And I was really happy that that was what came from it and a lot of people looked at different relationships in their life. I think women are very complicated. And I'd love to talk more about that with Fern. But, I mean, who knows what she wants to talk about? And I think it's great that she's built this entire kind of empire. I know what it's like to be a broadcaster that needs to diversify. And she really has.

Which you're doing well. Thank you very much. And she's built this over the last, like, what, 10 years or something to happy place? And she was one of the first people to be doing that to turn her podcast into something that meant a lot more than just an audio recording. So I'm really impressed with everything she's done. And I'd love to give her a hug. This isn't just an online thing, man. Yeah.

So great to be home. Love you. So proud of you. He did so good while I was away. Thanks. And here's to the next quarter. Let's take this to Christmas, shall we? Oh, Christmas.

I know. Sorry, it's too early. How is that the conversation? But it's autumn. I'm so excited. Next week, I'll be in a cozy jumper to really cement the point that we are on a new season. Yes, I am.

I'm going to wear this polo. You obviously not looked at the weather, but yeah, okay. Oh, is it still sunny next week? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I'm like dying to put a jumper on. Okay, cool. All right, love you.

I'll see you for rights of passage. See you. in a bit. Okay, bye. Thanks for listening to Miss Me. This is a Persephonica show.