Miss Me? - Shut Your Mouth You Sexy Bitch

Episode Date: August 14, 2025

Lily Allen and Miquita Oliver discuss the new Bonnie Blue documentary, the heyday of lads mags and whether they can still holiday in Ibiza.This episode contains very strong language, adult themes, strong sexual references and discussions about sexual assault. If you have been affected by any of the issues raised, you can find support via the BBC Action Line: https://bbc.co.uk/actionline/ Credits: Producer: Flossie Barratt Technical Producer: Will Gibson Smith Assistant Producer: Caillin McDaid Production Coordinator: Rose Wilcox Executive Producer: Ellie Clifford Assistant Commissioner for BBC: Lorraine Okuefuna Commissioning Editor for BBC: Dylan Haskins Miss Me? is a Persephonica production for BBC Sounds

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This episode of Miss Me contains very strong language, adult themes, strong sexual references and discussions about sexual assaults. my mum's mate's house to some random hotel in bath. We are making it work no matter what. It's quite fun when you realise you had no internet, where you live. Well, I mean, how would I have known? Because I've not been using it. You know, don't need it for all the books I've been reading. But yes, apparently, it was low.

So I've checked myself in to a local hotel. No, well done for making it work. Thank you. I know you've got a show tonight. I've got a show tonight. It's a big week in the theatre this week. We've got people coming in, and the theatre people, press night.

Yeah. And everyone I know that is coming, who's not meant to have told me that they're coming, is coming, and I know when they're coming, and that's great. Wicked. Everything's how it should be then. I know, people, I'm like, whatever you do,

don't tell me that you're coming to the theatre. It's like, okay, but could we have lunch? in bath on Tuesday. I'm like... That wasn't me. I didn't do that. Sure. Sure.

Of course. What are you doing in bath? Fucking twats. It's good that they let you have a few weeks before the press come. I used to always think press night was like the night after the first night, which I always thought was a bit too soon

if you're trying to get in something. No, you usually have like a few previews, like 10 previews or something. But because I'm such a slow coach and I've only just figured out what the play is about. it was made like this. What, they did it for you? They said, we'll do it a bit later?

I think so, yeah, just because it takes me a little while to, you know, grasp what's going on. Get a grass from reality. It's really interesting this play. It's very divisive. It's very upsetting to both a heterosexual men and heterosexual women and for completely different reasons. men do not like this play very much.

Oh. But isn't it the story of a woman losing her mind? Why would they find that triggering or difficult? Because she loses her mind because of the situation that she's in and a patriarchal system in which we have found ourselves. And a lot of men do not want to believe that that is a reality or that they have anything to do with it. Well, they need to get a fucking clue then because come to the fuck on.

And like I don't really understand a man believing that we don't live in a patriarchal society. That's what these plays are for, babes. Yeah, man. Open up the mind. It's interesting. The assistant director said that she was in the bar, like in the interval the other day. And there was like a family of four. And they were like really irate.

There was like two like older men and then, you know, their wives or whatever. And the men started off the conversation saying that it was actually like technically impossible for a woman to come from a middle. class background and be trapped. Oh my God. And by the end of the conversation, the women had joined in. And she was just, and Izzy, my director was just like, I just couldn't believe what I was hearing. It was like, it was just awful.

It was just awful. I mean, people are awful. He thinks it's a physical impossibility. Technically, it is impossible for a woman to feel trapped in this day and age. if she comes from a certain section of society, i.e. middle class, that you cannot, you cannot find yourself or you cannot call whatever it is that you are experiencing trapped. It's just not possible.

It's just not possible. It's just not possible. Quite like listening to people walk out of the theatre. There's also much debate about like whether people should feel any empathy for her or not because she does some pretty gross things. and I try and play it so that, you know, you like her a bit. Yeah. Not that you necessarily understand what the things that she does,

but some people just really, yeah, it's really interesting. And I guess maybe because I've spent so much time with the character now, I feel really fucking, like, defensive of her. I bet. I bet. Protective. And, you know, you can say whatever you like about my performance. I don't give a fuck, but it's like fucking don't talk about my header like that. Don't come for Hedder. I'll fucking kill you.

I can say she's a crazy bitch, but you can't. No, you can say she's a crazy bitch, but you can't say she deserves it. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I really do need to come and see it. As I said to mum, I said Lily's having quite a hard time with the play. It's quite exhausting. She has to go through a lot every night. And my mom said, can't she do some sort of farce?

Can she do an old coward play or maybe like a musical? And I did think, why is Lily drawn to this dark material? Didn't you just do a comedy? There are comedic elements to this play, but, you know, I mean, I guess it's the same thing that I do in my music, right? It's that I talk about some pretty dark shit, but like sort of glaze it and like, you know, donut glaze. It's like, isn't this nice? Everybody having a nice time. Oh, oh.

And then you're like, she's talking about erectile dysfunction. What the fuck? Yeah. Or, you know, the demise. of society as we know it. Talking about the demise of society as we know. Lily, do you know who Bonnie Blue is? I've heard of Bonnie Blue, yes.

Because I remember when she came up in the press before, it was when you were away, so I talked about her with Jordan. And he actually, he had some really interesting things to say. She's extremely famous now, so I don't even think I need to explain who she is, but I will anyway, because it's a podcast. But she notoriously grew from Onlyfans

and grew her, I suppose, notoriety and success on the back of sleeping with strangers, young and old across the board can sleep with Bonnie Blue if they are so willing but now there's a new Channel 4 documentary and the reason I'm at my mum's friend's house in lovely Waltham Stowe

up high and it's actually really nice to be up here in her office. Bonnie Blue rented out your mum's house is because Bonnie Blue rent out for an afternoon you're so clever that was good to do a bit of filming

sure that was good Um, uh, no. Because the internet's just stopped working at my mum's house, just completely stopped working. Because Carfield's been watching Bonnie Blue. Carfield maxed it out with his Bonnie Blue subscription. Overload. No.

Um, there is no reason. That's the more, that's the more annoying thing. There is no reason. It's just not working. Everyone's like, my mum's fine because she's, I've got Master Chef, Australia and ER recorded, so I'll be fine. But I was like, I need to call Lily and do miss me. That takes the internet.

So I came here. here. And yeah, it's quite interesting watching the actual film of it all and kind of the journey of it. I didn't know she started on OnlyFans. And you know more about OnlyFans than I do. Yes, I do. Yes, you do. And I guess, so OnlyFans gives you the freedom to go as far as you want. Obviously, you came from a more tame place. It was just some nice little toes. But you can have sex, like full sex on Onlyfans. I didn't know that. To be honest, I haven't really explored the site outside of my um you know my foot page so i i don't really i don't really know but yeah i guess so yeah no it turns like you can turns like you definitely can but what jordan was saying

was i mean because then there's a lot of like other people in the documentary talking like she's a predator she's got fucking twisted she's sick in the head um regardless of any of those ideas i just i think it's more of a conversation about the men and uh and jordan that's what jordan was talking about like this sort of lack of self-esteem within men and in this documentary you see their faces and it kind of changed it seeing their faces they all look so vulnerable and scared not powerful and ready for sex

everyone just looked very scared and freaked out and it did sit with me badly and I really wanted to not be like she's fucking twisted what is she doing why would anyone put themselves through this of course you don't have respect for your body

but it's really hard to watch it and not think those things what do you think I know you haven't seen the documentary but what do you think about this way of creating a life for yourself and success and making money? Because I like money but I don't, I think it's really important how you make money. You think it is important how you make money? Definitely. I don't, I don't, I think money's really tied to how it comes to you.

I think that we're both in an incredibly privileged position and situation to be able to say that. I think that most people don't really have many options. I don't know what, you know, you know, Bonnie Blue's social standing was before she decided to take this on as a career. for herself but on the whole basically I am of the thinking I'm thinking but I mean and I'm wondering if I really do truly believe it or not my standpoint of honor is that it you can do what the fuck you want with your own body and as long as you are prepared to deal with the consequences and you are aware of it she doesn't seem to think there are any maybe there's not for Well, that, you know, remains to be seen because, you know, these things take time to process. And, you know, she's young, right? How old is she?

She's 26. Okay. So she may, when she's, you know, 35, she may feel very differently to how she did. In fact, she, you know, almost definitely will because I feel very differently about how I was behaving when I was 25 to how I, you know, live my life now. one thing I would say is when I was saying that it's I think it's important how you make money this isn't about her making money to get by I do understand that I've been that person so is my mother just making money by any means you possibly can to just get by and put food on the table but this isn't about that kind of money this is about wanting to be rich and powerful and successful and make millions and millions of pounds and I think that if you want that kind of power I think you really need to look at the ways you choose to get there I do think that and I'm just personally would not want to choose this way.

Well, I think that most people that make, you know, that type of money are morally bankrupt and devoid in some way anyway. So I don't... That's not true. What about Oprah? She's rich and successful and she did great things to get there. She helped people. Yeah. I mean, you know, there are some, like, anomalies and there is like, you know, some people, but, you know, most people that make, you know, billions of pounds are exploiting somebody. in some way. Somebody is being exploited.

Whether it's, you know, kids in sweatshops in Southeast Asia or whether it's, you know, women, whether it's, you know, young people working for free, for your companies, for work experience. So somebody along the line is being exploited so that you can get as much profit as you possibly can. I was just going to say, is this the new porn? I wonder if this is a new porn. Yeah, I guess so.

What do you mean? Is it the new porn? Isn't it just same porn? No, because it's this sort of like, like she's, I guess she would be seen as a famous person now. And I imagine a lot of the boys that went to have sex with her were excited to sleep with Bonnie Blue. And for it to be filmed and then shown on early fans,

yeah, it feels like a new wave of porn. The porn that I remember as a teenager wasn't like this. Yeah. I mean, I guess, you know, you know, we all have, we all have different relationships with, to sex and to our bodies and, you know, and we've all grown up in different times, like, I really do think that the imagery that you've been subjected to on, with, with the internet, you know, it's different for all generations, right? I mean, like, our generation were probably, like, the first

generation to be exposed to, like, watching, like, beheadings on the internet, right? people didn't see that in the Western world like we weren't exposed to that kind of violence and once you have been exposed to those things that imagery you know your relationships humanity changes it's not to say that you know everyone has our age is like you know wielding knives in their back pockets and we'll

chop off somebody's head at any given chance but it you know may give you a different relationship or make you sort of disassociate somewhat to like humankind Yeah, well, I remember porn, though, particularly being something that was quite shameful and discreet. I mean, that was like we were in our, when we were really young, porn was something on the top shelf, you know, that was, that there would be like kind of a dodgy guy waiting for you to leave the shop so that he could go to the top shelf. And it was kind of like just above the mainstream, quite, quite literally, it was like the shelves of fashion magazines and whatever. And then above that would be really quite, you know, explicit porn magazines.

and then I think video porn came in and that's when everything became... Oh, oh, time to watch some porn? Is that you? No, I'm me. It's just me, it's my My Am app. It says I trust in my ability to build a better future. Thank you for that reminder, but I'm putting you on silent.

That's nice. That's a nice one. Yes, right, so you had the top shelf porn, but then what you had, what we really had was the arrival of the ladsman. and there was this loaded documentary on TV the old day little it was really good and it was James Brown that editor of Loader talking about you know the fact that he was 26 and he started this magazine I mean when it started there was like Gary Oldman smoking a fag on the front it was

all very cool and like our pursuit of sex and drugs and football is the number one thing in our lives and on our minds and it was it was kind of insane how much it took over the world the lad mag and I think that was when I started to to see like pornographic imagery sort of pasteurized and broken down for the mainstream, but it was still pretty porn-y, all that stuff. And it was quite intense because you'd see actresses that you saw on TV,

like Holly Oaks or EastEnders and suddenly like in a thong. What killed the lad mag? I would say probably, um... Third wave feminism? Third wave feminism? No, it wasn't a third wave of feminism, Lil, because it was like when loads of new magazines came out

that were diluting this kind of genre and this idea into just like sex instead of like culture and sex like there was no football anymore I'm talking about like Maxim FHM nuts by the time we got to Zoo magazine it was fucking over

it was dead out and it's actually very sad in the Loaded documentary when he talks about how that dilution really like ruined what they were trying to do with Loaded and let's just say Gary Oldman was no longer on the cover of these magazines and it was quite sad quite sad. Were you ever asked to do those? No, I think I was about 10. No, no, no, no, no, no. When we were in our early 20s and you were famous, these magazines were around, were you ever

asked to do like FHM or anything? Oh, I was on the cover of GQ, with my tits out. GQ's a classier bitch and you know it. That's why I did it and chose that particular publication to reveal my breasts for the first time. Are you actually topless on the cover of GQ? I believe so. Did a shoot with Simon Emmett Definitely Topless inside for sure But maybe not on the We've got something covering it How did you feel shit

I've never shot anything Topless How did that feel? Was it quite fun? Yeah, I love it Because you got such good boobs I was actually talking to someone else I quite like to do a play naked Oh my God

What was that play That Nicole Kidman did And she got naked in it And she came to London to do it And everyone was like Oh my God It's like Blue Room or something I think that'd be really interesting

I guess I have like a addiction to like nudity No no Like just feeling like Fucking exposed Vulnerable I don't feel like you are vulnerable When you're quite like

I mean you're quite nakedy Yeah but there's a power in the vulnerability That's what I mean is that you can present As being vulnerable and exposed But be safe and empowered at the same time And I like that feeling It feels like a good sweet spot. Yeah.

I mean, I'm not saying, I don't want to, like, do some, like, some gratuitously, like, naked play. But if there was a call for it, I could see myself, like, not being afraid of that, but, like, being excited by it. Yeah. I just fucking forgot. What am I talking about? I did a completely nude shoot. No, I had a thong on in the marshes with my friend Charlotte.

I loved that. That was great. I felt like a real, like, nymph in the woodland. And I remember thinking, I'm 36 This is probably the best my body will ever look Let's get it photograph, shall we? And now I'm like, yeah, I'm happy I did that That was four or five years ago

Don't look as good as that now I'm happy I did that Yes, you do, you look as good as you've ever looked What are you talking about? Thanks, babe. Shut to your fucking mouth Shut your mouth, you sexy bitch But anyway, back to those magazines, no,

it was before my time I mean, I was definitely Yeah, I wonder what it was that changed why blokes stopped buying magazines. The trend then became like the Grazias and the closers and all of those magazines, weeklies instead. But that was for women, so I wonder why men just stopped reading magazines,

I guess maybe because internet porn got so big. Possibly, possibly that, yeah. I mean, the thing is, with this Bonnie Blue stuff, I feel like really and truly, if we're honest with ourselves, and you kind of revealed it a little bit in terms of what you said about, much money she's making, like, people have been treating women like this for forever. What has changed is that, you know, there's now no middleman.

So there's no man that is subjecting Bonnie Blue to that and taking the money. She's making all the money herself. So now we're having a conversation about whether that's acceptable. We weren't having it before. And we wouldn't be having this conversation. If she wasn't pocketing $1.5 million and somebody else was and that person was male, I don't think this conversation would be in the mainstream. because all the power and money is going to her.

Yeah. And I think that in this age, people are scared, men are scared. I think that with the rise of AI and also the rise of, you know, a conversation list like Andrew Tate or whatever, the sort of red pilling that's going on on the internet with men, I think that men are feeling scared, they're scared of their jobs, they're scared of the workplace, they're scared of AI taking their, they're feeling disenfranchised. And when you are disenfranchised, you take it out on the person who's, you know, more disenfranchised, which is women. And I think it's just going to get worse.

But what about the men that went to see her? What about the men that queued up to do this? I don't feel like they're feeling particularly powerful. What about them? Men have been paying to have sex with women since time again. Yeah, true say. That's what I mean. I don't know why it makes me so uncomfortable.

Because as you're saying, this is archaic and this is historic. but there's something about it that just it does make me feel really, like, worried. Yeah, I think what you're talking about, the thing that makes you feel uncomfortable is the fact that, you know, women seeking enjoyment of sex and or... Not being something that they're subjected to

is something that we are taught is shameful from the get-go. Like, that's not the dynamic. That's not how the patriarchy works. Like, yeah, so we do... When you say, like, I don't know what it is, it just makes me feel uncomfortable. How about it's that thing that was ingrained in you from aged five years old? Like, it's that.

And it's the fact that someone, listen, I'm not saying, yeah, all power to Bonnie Blue, like go and do what the fuck you want. I don't know her. I don't know what her situation is. I don't know, you know, what I do know is that, you know, if it makes us feel uncomfortable and ashamed and dirty in some way, that's far more, it's not to do with her. It's to do with us and ourselves and our relationship to our bodies

and our relationship to sex. where we feel that we fit into things. And there's something that you can know on an intellectual level and then there's something that you have, you know, that has seeped into our subconsciouses because of the world that we live in. And I think that that is at the root of it. Well, I think I've always had a fear of gangbangs,

if I'm completely honest, because that, to me, has a backbone of violence and it feels like a powerless situation. even if someone is saying I felt powerful, just a little too fucking close to rape for my liking. I know it's not rape, but it just gives me the same feeling, watching four strangers fuck her from different angles

and slap her. And she says she loves it. I'm sure she's having a good time. She tells her she is. But for me, it just feels far too adjacent to something that I'm terrified of. Yeah, I mean, I think, you know,

like a real, like gang bang rape is a real gang bang rape. But, you know, I don't know if you've ever watched gang bang on porn sites. Oh, no, no, Lily, my relationship with porn is very not existent because I watched some porn in Japan that was 24 that really fucked me up and I never really found another way into it after that. It was like this young Japanese school girl being stalked in the woods

and it freaked me out. Again, a little too close to rape. I mean, I guess, you know, there's a lot of porn. there's like a sort of fantasy element to it right and I think that you know I've I've seen gangbangs before on porn sites and I've quite often what they'll have afterwards it's like you know when when it's over and it's the woman and she's just talking to all the men that she's had sex with in a very like casual like this is work kind of a way and it's interesting I mean it sort of destroys the sort of element of fantasy of it I suppose in some way but it's also reassuring to know that what you've

just seen isn't real and violent it's just but i think you've always found to correct me if i'm wrong safety in porn i wouldn't go that far as in like no as in like it's your comfort blanket but maybe i feel like throughout the years you have watched it and enjoyed it a hell of a lot more than me uh and so has phoebe um and i wonder how you can do that in a way that i can't i've been quite I've always been quite jealous of it, the fact that you could be open about the kind of sex you like watching the kind of porn you like and let it be a pleasurable, enjoyable experience for you.

I feel a lot of shame and a lot of fear when I'm anywhere near porn. Still, to this day, maybe I just haven't found my porn. What about Bonnie's barely legal slogan and approach? I don't know what that means. She just, she did like a whole thing about, she went to uni's. This is before the 1,000 men night.

And she said, I'm here to sleep with as many barely legal. boys as I can to celebrate them getting into uni. And people were, you know, very uproarious about the fact that she was having sex with boys that young. But that I really do feel we've got to be joking because that really is something that men have been doing and still do in plain sight in front of us all the time historically as well. So I think Bonnie Blue very much spreads it across the household, actually.

I think she's done the barely legal approach, which freaked everyone out. but loads of different age ranges walking into that room in the documentary. Should we have a break? Should we have a little break? Maybe. If only Blue takes a break, I'm going to take a fucking break.

Yeah. We'll see you afterwards. Oh, welcome back to Miss Me. We're going to Ibiza. To the land of a million an hour. To anyone else, remember. the Venga boys Yes

Yes We're gonna have a party In the Mediterranean See me God they were shit God they were bad I always thought it was that we're going to eat pizza What do they say?

Ibiza Oh Right okay Oh my god Mika I'm tired Everyone's going to Ibitha Some people are being dragged

To Ibiza Because two people they love very much are getting married. Who's being dragged to Ibitha? That's me, babe. Did you know I was going Bifa? No, who are you going to Ibitha for? Ellie and Kieran are getting married.

Christ's alive. Oh, Ibiza. Yeah, man. Okay. That's right. Can I just say, Ellie, is someone I work with. I love her and her boyfriend more than anyone in the world. They are my favourite couple.

They love each other so well. And I would do anything for them, including go to Ibitha. But I don't think I'll ever, ever go again. because I've done my time and you've done yours, haven't you? Wait, have you been or you're going? I'm going in two weeks. Personally, I'm not in an Ibiza place right now, you know?

Well, that's what you said about Glasdenbury and then suddenly you were there having a great time, so... That is true. I wouldn't put it past you to suddenly call me and be like, I'm going to bea. Yeah, I mean, I would need... The thing is, is that I'm not really like part of a friend group that would want to go.

You know, I could see a world where, like, the last time that I went to Ibiza, I'm going to drop some names now, was when I had recently split up with my ex-boyfriend Dan. And Mark Ronson was going to Ibiza to DJ, and he had a fancy villa, and he was like, why don't you come out?

And it was me, Mark, Caius, Mark's manager, and another guy called Andrew and it seemed like yeah if you're going to go to Ibiza why not go with like you know one of the world's like hottest DJs and stay in a nice big fancy house

and we'll go to nice restaurants that's the other thing in Ibitha is like unless you're sort of like tied in and clued up and got all of the connections there then it's like really hard to get like table in a nice restaurant like no offence but I'm not going to a club and like standing like that's just not happening

so I would need to be like you know sorted out with the table and stuff I realize I'm sounding very like you know no unrelated to but I'm at a different stage in my life I'm sorry how's it unrelatable to state a preference

of where you like to holiday I'm sorry what I'm most annoyed about is like there's one thing hating Ibiza no because I can I will only do Ibiza if I'm doing it in an extremely privileged way like I'm not doing I'm not like queuing up to get into a fucking club

I'm not like, that's not why I'm there. That's not happening. That's fine. Neither is grimy. Like, everyone that I know is going to I-Bether as a privileged motherfucker as well. I feel like everyone in Ibitha sort of pulls out their privileged card. It's quite privileged places. It's really, really expensive.

Because there used to be a club called Privilege. And I actually had a card to get into Privileged. I had a privileged card. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Hello, this is my privilege card. Wow. I guess it probably.

Sorry, I think privilege the nightclub didn't know the irony. I will say, you know, when I was 18, maybe a bit younger, I did work in Ibiza. I worked in a fucking record shop called Plastic Fantastic on the main drag in San Antonio. Eek, Lily. I would stand in the street outside the record shop selling tickets to nightclubs. How old were you? What year is this? I was fucking young.

I don't know what the fuck I was doing or why anyone let me do it. But I know I was staying in a Welsh hostel. What? And I had to like share with some. some guy who I don't know. Yeah. It was bleak. It was fucking bleak. I think you were like 15.

Yeah, maybe. I think it was about then, or maybe 16, but I remember, because I was going there quite a lot around that time as well. This is when, I don't know what you were doing there, but this is when the parents got really into it. Nana and Cam started renting a house in Ibita and they would, like, want to, like, party the whole time. And we sort of went when we were like 17, me, Phoebe, took Olivia.

And I, uh, I liked it. I just hated the clubs. Hated the clubs. Fucking Pasha. Give me a break. Yeah. Give me a break. Yeah.

I mean, that's the thing about it for me is that it's like, if you're not going there for the nightlife, which I'm not really, unless it's to like watch one of my friends absolutely smash it out of the park or myself. So you're not going there for the Blair It Beats. I'm not really going there for the Blair It Beats. Therefore, if you're there for other things,

it would have to be like, you know, food, weather, nice beaches. And I'll just, I'd rather go to Italy. Yeah, I'd rather go to Italy. And I think that's just where we are in our lives. I'd much rather go to like Portofino. It's ancient the partying energy on Ibiza. I think it was like formed in like, can me pretending this is off the top of my head.

Let me write it, read my writing. 654 BC. They established the settlement of Iboism. I-B-O-S-I-M, I-boesom, which is I-Bether town. But then obviously in the 70s, I mean, there's basically like partying laylines. there and I probably would have liked to party there in the 70s. I think that probably would have been

quite fun when it was all hippie and spiritual. But when I was there last time... If we were in our late teens, early 20s, in the 70s, then yes, maybe. That's how we could go to Ibiza. But I went two years ago for Sasha's hen. Alfie, your brother, was doing Theo, Theo and Sasha,

my cousin was getting married to Sasha. And we were doing a hen in Ibiza. They were doing their stag in Ibiza. And Alfie went in like unbelievably so he got like there was like 20 of them with a 20 room villa and they were there for like two weeks doing things all day and getting fucked up every night I was like this is exhausting come on so we did a five day and then we could have merged into a sort of stem for like the last two nights and everyone was just having the most incredible time and I thought it must be me because I fucking hate it here so everyone go have fun this summer in 2025 on the white eye

I'll see you there. I can't wait. Ew. I'm sorry for your loss. I'm sorry. You have to go. Thanks, Lily. Oh, you know what happened here on the weekend? First of all, I was meant to come back to London on Saturday night after the show, and it was the last train out of bath, and it was fucking heaving, and I didn't, hadn't reserved myself a seat, so I couldn't sit down. And then it was like, you know, lots of headlights and stagdos, I guess, and just like these people got on and started Lily Allening me

and I was like, I actually, I can't, I haven't got anywhere to sit. Oh my God, Lily. So I just got off the train. It was funny actually because I got off the train and then I was like, have I made the right decision? And then I got back on the train. And then I was like, oh, no, I can't.

And then I got off the train three times. And then just went to the pub and I went to go and meet all of my cast and that they were lovely. But I felt a bit sad because I had wanted to have my weekend in London. Sorry, is this when you were coming home? for the weekend like you said that's what happened yeah yeah and so i couldn't but then we went and had a really delicious sunday roast me brendon who is you know mr mr bates from downton abbey you might know him as he's your new mate isn't he i love him so much um oh guess you came to

see the show last week jennifer saunders she loved it um she loved it anyway so she came and And yeah, so we did Sunday lunch with Tom and Julia, who are, you know, also my two of my castmates who I love. Everyone on this play just adores each other. It's like, we've only got two weeks left and we're kind of like, I mean, gagging for it because it's fucking grueling, but also can't really imagine a world without these people in it. Oh, little.

Well, usually you do a play for a lot longer, right? This is such a short run. It's a short run. Short intense. But guess what I went to see in the cinema. yesterday after lunch Naked Gunn Give me a break

It was so fucking funny No Lily It was what I needed It was some light relief I was like you do Bonnie Blue You do you Bonnie Blue And I'll do me some naked gun With Liam Neeson and Pammy Anderson

Do you know what I do like I love what Pamela Anderson Is doing with her comeback Because she did the last show girl And you'd be like Okay so she's gonna do like Independent Films right now And then she just comes

from the left with naked gun and with Liam Neeson. Such a good move. Good move. You know what? There was an advert for a film with Benedict Shmambrochmatch and Olivia Coleman called Roses or something and it looked

fucking funny. I haven't seen, is this a film? Because I haven't seen anything that I've actually wanted to go to the cinema to see in time. Yes, it's a film and it was an advert before Naked Gun and it was I was pissing at myself I had like a real afternoon

of like laughing in the cinema yesterday God it was nice That is so nice That's what you did with your day off I was gonna go take myself to see sinners But it's not there anymore I do like the cinema on my own But I've never done it

Sorry I've only done it once I get a bit nervous It's good to do things on our own though isn't it Yeah I like that you went To see naked gun Just giggled the afternoon away Nice little bit of light relief from Heder

I totally get it Yeah, it was great All right, darling I better get out of Kelly's house All right What are you gonna do for the rest of the day Oh you've got a show You got a show

All right you're tired I'll let you have a little nap Before the show And have a great show And I will continue to not tell you When I'm coming to Bath I'll see you for listen bitch The theme for next week's listen bitch

Is slang Slang slang Slang Slang And we will see you then Bye Lily I'll see you for Listen, bitch.

Bye, babe. Bye, babe. Thanks for listening to Miss Me Me with Lily Allen and Mekita Oliver. This is a Persephonicah production for BBC Sounds. If you have been affected by any of the issues raised, you can find support via the BBC Action Line.

That is BBC.com.com.uk slash action line. Hello, you gorgeous people. Are you hungry? Because I bloody am. It comes with the table. territory when you're referred to as one of the world's leading food critics, which is why I'm doing a new podcast in which I take seriously interesting people out to lunch in a restaurant I reckon they'll like.

I'll be pelting my guests with good food and the finest wines known to humanity, while I lightly grill them on great successes, miserable failures, and of course their weird eating habits. Heck, I'll even do you a doggie bag too. Well, I won't. This is a podcast, but you can at least join me at the table. Listen now on BBC Sounds. Thanks.