Miss Me? - Simply The Best... Bits

Episode Date: August 28, 2025

Lily Allen and Miquita Oliver take a walk down memory lane and listen back to their favourite moments from the past year of Miss Me?This episode contains very strong language, adult themes and strong sexual references. Credits: Producer: Flossie Barratt Technical Producer: Will Gibson Smith Assistant Producer: Caillin McDaid Production Coordinator: Rose Wilcox Executive Producer: Ellie Clifford Assistant Commissioner for BBC: Lorraine Okuefuna Commissioning Editor for BBC: Dylan Haskins Miss Me? is a Persephonica production for BBC Sounds

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BBC Sounds, music, radio, podcasts. This episode of Miss Me contains very strong language, adult themes and strong sexual references. Hello everyone, both Lily and I are having a much needed summer break, but wanted to give you something still to enjoy and reminisce. Nissan. In today's episode, we've both chosen our favorite moments from the past year that we wanted to bask in all over again. We're going to begin with Monty Don. We have actually got a message from Monty Don. What? Yeah. What are you talking about? No, stop. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Should we listen?

listen to it. Shut up! Oh my God! Monti-Dy-Don's voice is about to be part of Miss Me. This is like epoch-making. Let's go. What's he got? Hello, Lily, Makita.

It's wonderful that you're doing an episode devoted to gardening. I love it. And I'm so pleased that more and more people are realizing that gardening is actually really enjoyable and really good for your soul, even though it does make your back ache a bit. Anyway, I look forward to listening to it And all power to you Bye-bye He just said our names

Are you not excited He said our names Monty Don said our names Hello, Lillian Makita Wow, Monty Don just said my name Can I just say one thing that I didn't say on gardening That really has been bugging me But the way gardening

And I want to make Monty proud Now that I know I was listening The way that gardening mirrors life is that you have to deadhead things for them to grow. If you don't cut the tops off, if you don't cut off the dead weight or all the good energy from the root doesn't go into the right place.

It goes into the dead. So that is life. If you don't get rid of the old shit that's not serving you, then all your good new energy is just going back into that old shit. You have to cut it off to make a new bloom, to make new bloom, new flower, new life.

Anything else you want to talk about, Lil? Anything you need to get off your chest? Oh, you know what we could talk about? I've had a couple of notes. Children and water entitlement. What? What do you mean? Like, kids these days, I'll be like driving the car.

And I'm not actually talking about my kids. I'm talking about other people's kids. Although my kids would do the same thing. But I'm thirsty. I'm like, okay. Well, we're going to be home in half an hour. And they're like, I'm thirsty now. Can we pull over at a shop and get some water?

And I'm like, where has this come from? Like, in my childhood. You had to wait. We would, like, be lucky if we, like, past a fountain in Coram Fields so we could have a few little sips. Like, okay. All right, Lil, please.

No, I'm not. fucking joking. Like there was not like liquid on tap when we were kids. It didn't exist. Now these kids are entitled. They think that they are allowed to have an every hand bottle of water at the, you know, click of a finger because they're thirsty. So I'm, you're going to be home. There's glass there and a tap and you'll have some water when we get home. You can suck on the rusty tap when we get home. What is this? You're not dying. We're talking 20 minutes. Like grow up. Sorry. They've been brought up in a world of immediacy.

So they just, like, things now, that's just how things work. Things are immediate. Also, I think that like in, you know, this generation of children, like everyone's carrying around their standy cups, their water bottles, like, you know, when we were kids,

it was like a novelty to have, like, mineral water in a plastic bottle, right? That was, like, relatively new. How did I travel with water when I was young? We didn't. We didn't have any water. No. We didn't.

Oh, careful, a Daily Mail will pick up on that. We didn't have any water. Oh, no, but we didn't. We didn't have any water. You'd get like those little plastic cups at school where you could fill up with water. Oh, yeah, that was it. Did kids have like disposable, or not disposable,

you know, keep forever water bottles now as part of like their everyday lifestyle? Yeah, it's a huge trend. It's a huge trend. So there used to be Stanley Cups. Then it was these cups called Awalas. And now there's like these cups. that have got straws that come out,

but we can turn them upside down and the water doesn't come out of them. It's a whole thing. I would love that. It's a whole thing. I love that, though. No, but it's good because at least we're talking about something

that's carrying water for them. Like, at least they're not drinking alco pops. Yeah, well, they should take responsibility for their own fucking water bottles. Stop complaining to me. It could pull over at news agents. Needing an effie and refill. Probably get myself a parking ticket

in a Yulele zone. Jordan accused me of having an indie sleaze romantic background, which is not factual or fair. I didn't realise what indie sleaze was. You had a visceral reaction to that phrase. My idea of indie sleeves was slightly looser than what it actually. years it was very much almost specifically the group of people we were talking about at the start of podcast not that we want this to be the indie sleeve special but um yes uh it was a period of time

i suppose uh there is defined mainly by sort of like instagram accounts now but obviously at the time you didn't think oh we're in such an indie sleaze place but then tall febe and i were talking earlier and i was reminded of a sort of particular pair of lace brown winkle pickery type boots and a particularly shit leather jacket that I've rocked. So yeah, I guess I was in the Indy Sleeze world. You were. But I didn't date anyone from that world and everyone out of boys and bands.

That wasn't my thing. What? I, no, no, that's not me. I remember the person that I told you to stay away from. That person's in a band. That's not, he's not Indy Sleeze. No, that's a different time. Are you fucking kidding?

Oh, God, is that indie sleaze? Can I say? No. Please. Please. Yeah, yeah, we'll beep it. If I was to open indie sleaze, not even, no, but the maddest thing is,

it's neo indie sleaze. It's not even OG indie sleaze. Oh my God. That's what I'm saying. So, okay, so indie slees, like most things. He is the sleaziest. I'll say that with chest. He was fit at the time, at the time.

He's never, no, no, no, no, no. He was fit at the time. But anyway, it evolved into this neo. indie sleeves moment, yes. And then where does it live now? In terms of how I was referring to your type or just in generally in life? In terms of how I'm referring to my type. I actually think indie sleeves might be dead.

Now, but now what it is is you found people who would have been indie sleeves. Yeah, that's it. But now wear baggy jeans and like a stussy hoodie and then you're like, oh my God, I want to be this boy is so and I'm just like, that is

that guy would have been in 2006 that guy would have been in a fucking band Okay, so I showed Jordan a picture of Harris. Don't say his name. I'm going to say it because baby girl's out now. Go on. I'm going to see everyone, he's fit. He's engaged to Rose Gray.

I love their story. They're like sort of school sweethearts. But he's fit. And I showed Jordan a picture of him in a shoe in baggy stussy track suit wear. And Jordan was like, Makita, that is indie sleeves. That's what it's become. I was like, oh shit. Harris would be fuming if I said that.

I'm so sorry, Harris. It's not necessarily his life choices. It's more just his look. My point was, in a world where people didn't have their own choices, it was just based off of their look. I could make, if given the freedom to, Harris Dickinson, look in these sleeves. That's my point.

Stick him in a trillby, some tight jeans. It would be uncomfortable, but it wouldn't be unbelievable. Be uncomfortable, it wouldn't be unbelievable, yeah? Correct, yeah. You could make them in these sleeves. There are people who you literally can't, that was my point. There are people who have a look

that you literally can't make indie sleeves. Like, John Bejaker. Did you? I don't know why I said John Bejaker. John Bejkeg is literally the first person. I don't know why I thought of that. Maybe because he just likes a baseball cap quite a lot.

I could never see him in skinny jeans in a trillby. John Biaker's never, I can never see him fronting an indie band. He does not have time in these sleeves, I can imagine. Who knows? But, okay, now we get into type. Whereas, plot twist, Damson Idris, he could be in these sleeves. Sure, sure.

Get him into some indie sleeves. So what is this? What is that difference? Both gentlemen are African. It's a sleekness. It is a sleekness. It's a, what's the word? It begins with like an F.

It's like a felt. Fence. Svelte. Oh, Sveld. So skinny, pretty white boys. So one of the stories that may come up, I mean, I doubt it, but you know that thing where like you don't remember something and it's like this memory for someone else?

And you're like, okay, there was this cameraman on the show, on the pilot I did. But there was this cameraman who was like, kind of attractive. And then I spent the whole day with him, talking, filming with him. And then on the train back, he goes, we've actually met before. I was like, here we fucking go. And he was like, I was a sound man first and I was doing a full music and Lily was on and Lily on her mic went, Charlie, do you want to come and have dinner with us tonight or something?

And then me and you went and picked him up and took him out. So I said, where did we go? No, but he's like, yeah. I was like, okay, I get what period of time this was. Wow, I have no recollection of this. We would have been about 23. Did he remember asleep with him? No, but I think you were like on him and like, come on, Charlie.

And he had this whirlwind of a night. We then took him to Grouches. He's like, and then Robert Patterson from Twilight turned off. I was like, yeah, this is us about 23 and on one. It's probably like a Tuesday. And then you ditched him and fucked off. And he said, do you think she's coming back for me? And I was like, no, you should probably go.

Oh, God, I'm such a bitch. I'm so sorry. No, no, you weren't a bit, but that's the thing. He was like, I had the time of my life. He said, I had such a great night out with you lot. He's like, oh, you're welcome. You're welcome. Can he come to the Christmas lunch?

Can I ask? Can I ask you something that's a bit uncomfortable and embarrassing? This is why I'm on Miss Me. This one's uncomfortable and embarrassing for me. I think it's really important to talk about it. If I'm really honest, any feelings of shame and fear were around the fact that I don't have a partner

and I don't have kids. And I think for someone like you turning 40, if I'm honest in my head, I would be thinking, what would the fear be about? Wow. What would the stress be about? Because your partner's next to you

and you've just had a kid. Wow. And it's interesting that it doesn't fucking matter that stuff is still there, that fear and that anxiety. But did that satiate that kind of anxiety at all that you're like, actually, I have found someone I love and I have just had a child? No, because that's not all there is. I mean, it's wonderful.

But it's so, that question is really powerful. And actually, I think it's something to unravel and unspin and demystify in a huge way. for women, look, the signifiers that we were told we were supposed to have at 40 are as unhealthy as the things that we were told we would then not have after 40. You know, it's all unhealthy. It's all, it's all maddening and it's all about patriarchal, you know, head buckery, really. And I think, I don't know, I read a really, I read a brilliant book ages ago, which I think every woman should read, especially at this point of, you know, getting older, thinking about parenting, thinking about, you know, all these signifiers that are supposed to add up to something at this just distinct point in your life. And it's this book called Of Woman Born by Adrian Rich. She's an amazing poet and feminist and she's just a brilliant writer

and she's one of those voices that makes things actually make sense for me. You know, when people are like, you should read this writer and you read them. You're like, oh, no, I don't get it. I don't like it. That didn't work for me. That was pretty terrible. And there's a bit in the book that's in this piece that's sort of saying, when did we get to this point where women, specifically without children,

are judging themselves on something that they don't have rather than something that they do. Yeah. That's wrong. Any messaging that takes you away from authentically looking at the riches of your life is wrong. Also, do you know what else I did? I broke my lime bike virginity. Lily, this I saw.

Okay. And not even on your stories. our team, our Miss Me team, were so gassed and excited that they felt it was something they need to put in a group for us to all enjoy. I will say there are other bikes, which I've also subscribed to since. I'm now a subscriber to three different bike suppliers. Did you never do this in New York? No.

But I think it's assumed that everyone's been on one because I haven't really had that much experience and I think I went on my third the other day. I was gas. I had such a laugh. There were like five of us And we were like We're like driving through the streets So suddenly we were on the banks of a canal

Oh wait I went to a club Yes by the way Did you go to the after party? I did Oh my God Is it called Bora Bora is that a club Wasn't it at Colifactory? Yeah

But maybe there's an I don't know I heard the words borer bore I was like I know I was like Oh okay All right Yes I went to the club And obviously and got in really late and you know I went to the club

I like went and stood in the dance floor danced it was like there there were lots of young people there I was like that I feel like I'm old but it's okay I'm going to embrace it also what am I doing it's 3 o'clock in the morning I didn't get into 4 4 a.m I don't stay that late in a while I saw my favourite person in the world Alex Konsani was there. Do you remember the girl we were talking about? And Amelia de Moldenberg, who is hilarious, by the way.

Did they hear us gas them up the week before? I doubt it. But she is very funny. She was so, like, neurotic because she clearly, like, knew the people that were hosting the after party and had a bunch of friends that were there, and she couldn't get her the friends, the wristbands. And so she was, like, in a real, like, Amelia de Moldenberg panic about, like, people being trapped up there.

And she was like, I've got to go and get the drinks. And then I got to take the drink back up there. And I was like, okay, babe, that's okay, it's fine. But it was very chicken shop date in the colour factory. Live. At 3 o'clock in the morning, live, yeah, and direct. Were you partying with Amelia de Moldenberg? Oh, my God.

Babe, I was partying with all the kids, all the cool cats of East London. Harris Dickinson was there, and his girlfriend Rose. She said that they listened to Miss me. I know. And she was like, no, stop, stop. She said, no, she said. Nikita says that she fancies him. And I was like, oh, yeah, she does.

She was like, do I need to be worried about that? I was like, I don't think she's the only person to be worried. Yeah, exactly. That's why I thought I was safe because she sent me a message going, babe, I just want to say, like, loving miss me. And I was like, which episode? It was the one where I totally told you all done. She was like, do I need to worry?

And I was like, yeah, you do need to worry. But not about McGita, just the rest of the world. R-O-W, babe. You better keep an eye on that piece of ass. No. I did say hi to Alex Konsani, and she was like, oh my God, who is this old? person trying to talk to me. I was like, yeah, fair. Was that the vibe? I doubt it.

No, she was, I mean, no, I just said, I have to say, I saw your chicken shop date with it to Maldonburg. It's very funny. I've watched it a hundred times. She was like, oh my God, thank you, babe. And then it was like, okay, no, yeah, I get it. I'm old. You only get 10 seconds with young people. That's the world. Well, it's nice to have you back in town, in the bits, showing us how it's done. You know what I'm saying. I feel like it's like party work, party work. Absolutely.

Oh my God, I'm exhausted from all this reminiscing going down memory lane. It's just very tiring, isn't it? Let's have a break and a little sit down and Lily will take over after. to the break. Welcome back. I don't know about you, but I'm refreshed and ready to get into these best bits. You've already heard Makita's picks. Her choices were okay, but mine are even better. I mean, how can you be asked discussing potatoes or motherhood sending nudes or actual life hacks? Let's get into it. Hi, Lily Ann Makita.

My name is Jessica. I am a secondary school teacher in Cambridge. Potatoes are just the best. They are my desert island food. But my question to you is, if you could be represented as a type of cooked potato, what would that be? So is that a dofinoir, or are you more of a potato waffle?

This isn't kind of what you would like to eat. It's more what represents your energy and your personality in potato form. Lots of love. Let's say it at the same time. No, that's going to be confusing for people. Okay, Gagel. I knew you'd become a tyrant in this episode. I'm not a tyrant.

A potato tyrant. Me first, you say. I think I'm like, not like mashed potato. I think I'm like whipped potatoes because I like to, I feel like I'm like comforting but chic and classic. So more like a pom puree. Do you agree? That you're a pom puree?

I think you might be more of an ali-goo. Okay. Not everyone knows what Ali-go is, you know. Okay. Not everyone's from chefs and fancy. It's boiled potatoes. vigorously mixed with garlic, milk, and butter. Obviously, potatoes and butter.

Thank you. I'll be in Aligoth. I know what I am. I know what I am. The only way you've ever been able to explain who you really are in potato form. I am a reloaded baked potato. So I'm baked and then I am emptied out. I am mashed and butter and cheese.

put in and then I'm put back into the skin and then heated up. So I'm basically like an updated, more refined version of a classic. Do you know what I mean? I'm developed. I'm a developed classic. It's not deconstructed. No, no, no. Is it? It's not. It's not deconstructed. No, no. It's actually reconstructed.

With a crispy, hard exterior and cheesy on the inside. down, I'm cheesy. But you're not going to, you're not going to see that just by looking at me. Wow. I think the new music might need to start in potatoes. I think something's there to unlock you. Okay.

Lily, we have two very different kinds of fame. I wonder if our loneliness is different within it because of that. Because I didn't have so much noise, which I feel like then dies down, which creates a different sense of loneliness, like crowds, pabarazzi, rah. Yeah, I felt, yeah, really lonely. And I remember, like, sometimes, you know, because I would read my own press, so I'd, like, read, you know, Lily in Trouble in, like, Gratio or, you know, whatever else those stories were that used to come out, still do. Every single day, yeah. And sometimes when I would be trying to have like an open and vulnerable conversation with somebody that I cared about and loved and, you know, respected.

And they would, I could tell that they had read these things too, just in the way that they were talking to me. So like, you know, there was a conversation that I had with someone, you know, that was about, you know, the breakdown of mine and Sam's marriage. And I wanted to talk to them about that. And they said, and, you know, you must be, like, really worried about, like, keeping this place running. And I was like, no, I'm not.

But I know that where you got that from. You got that from that article that was about, you know, me not having enough money or something. I just, it's just like, oh, my God, I can't, I can't even, like, have a conversation without, I feel so, so, like, everyone's already got my number, because they read this stuff that they believe. And so when you're trying to tell someone what your problem is, and they're like, yeah, but isn't your problem this?

It's like, no, I'm telling you what my problem is. And you're not listening to me because you just see me as this thing. And that's really lonely, yeah. Very aware of that time. I'm very aware of my misgivings as a friend in that time. It just wasn't there for you properly. I really wasn't. I couldn't really understand

because I think also because I was famous in this really different way I was like I get it but it's so different I did have stories but not every day it was like sort of five terrible stories about me across 10 years not shitty things about me every single day till now really for you till now

so it'd be great if we were talking about this in like a past 10 situation but this shit still goes down But then, you know, I think my loneliness within being a well-known person came from, I've discussed it before, but came from being mixed race and feeling like I didn't have anyone that looked like me in that position. So I felt very unworthy of that position and that's a very lonely feeling, which is why I threw it all away and, you know, shoved it all up my bum instead.

That's why I sort of like pressed you a little bit on that on our last show when you were talking about Jasper and what he said because I imagine that that had something, there was something going on there that felt quite similar, you know, being with sort of. Yeah, and then it, yeah, and then cemented by the press calling me Lily Allen's grubby little friend for 10 years. It was like, okay. Oh, God, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Oh, we should not be sorry because we survived. Yeah. I'm happy we experience both these things made us stronger little and experience wise and women who will not take shit of any kind that's who we've become

I've become Ruster and you've become I'm a bit of a dormer we do we do but in theory I don't take shit from no one but yes in life

I absolutely yeah still keep coming into my life but as I said life is a spiral not a circle you are always met with the same things. What's the speech in Cool Runnings where he goes, I feel pride.

I feel power. I'm a badass mother who don't take no shit from nobody. Oh my God, maybe that is your New Year's resolution. I feel pride. I feel power. I feel power. I'm a badass mother who don't take no shit from nobody.

If anyone hasn't seen Cool Runnings, you might need to change your life. It's quite a good New Year film, actually. I will take that line. That is why I love you for just pulling that cool running's mantra. Quote out of bag. In our loneliness, listen, bitch. It's why I do this with only you.

I've never sent a nude to anyone. No, me either. We prudes. Nude prudes. Yeah, yeah I did send a boob to The guy from first dates That I was dating

From Grimmie's couch Cool How'd it go down? Did you get a thumbs up? I'm actually not saying how it went out What's the best, like What's the best response? Like, wow, your tits are amazing

Or like, heart? Yeah, what are we looking for? I suppose you want like... I think double exclamation mark But that's... But that's a bit like, wow, boobs! You want it to be a bit more like grown-up, sexy response. Hmm, what would that be?

What do I want? I can't wait to put those in my mouth later. Okay, so that stuff I don't find that hot. I do really like, oh gosh, it's so embarrassing. You say it a sex thing. And what you want, I suppose, is whatever the discourse is to lead to this person definitely thinking about having lots of sex with you. surely that's why we're all here in the nudie prudy game i just think you're just giving them

something for the wank bank aren't you and they're either like thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks saved saved saved yeah saved to album nice one um okay so we haven't done it we are prudes but yeah we might be entering our nude era so we'll get back to you on that one In the middle of it all, I had our friend Grimmies, Nicholas Grimshaw's 40th birthday. Oh, that old hag. It's 40, is she? You bitch. Listen, I know you're now like, you're literally our friend that's in her 30s still now. Because we're all just 40.

Enjoy it? I'm enjoying it. I'm really enjoying it. it. I'm really enjoying it. No, it hasn't been as exciting as you hoped. But it was definitely like, this is going to be a school reunion. There are so many people that we all know together,

that we've known for 20 years, maybe a little bit more. So I was very like, okay, here we go. And it was wonderful. It was really nice to see all the different ways that someone wants to celebrate this milestone birthday. This is like my fourth or fifth friend that's had a 40th now.

But it was really emotional. I saw some people I haven't seen in a really long time. and everyone is like, as you said after my birthday, healthy, happy, doing well. Nothing that I assumed we would be doing at 40. And I do think you find yourself looking at the different ways that people's lives look. And I realize there are quite a lot of us now. I'd probably say 80% of us who are mothers and then 20% that aren't. And it made me kind of go back to that conversation in my head that I've been having about whether I even want to be a mother.

I think there's a difference between wanting kids. I want to have kids and actually wanting to be a mother. And it's quite nice to just have a dalliance every now and then in the land of not being a mother because everything is about being a mother, especially when you're my age, 40 as a woman. Everyone's asking you, do you not want to have kids? Do you want to have kids?

How are you seeing someone? Do you have a boyfriend? And it's a lot. But what I realized at Grimmies is there are a few other people, just a few, that also have this pressure and this fear. And we can be honest with each other and talk to each other about it. And that really helps.

For me, I just have a lot of curiosity about whether I can be a mother, how long you really have. Because I did some research and there are statistics that say you can be a mother quite easily in your 40s, but usually if you've already had children, if it were to be your first pregnancy,

of course it's much harder. And that tick. Ticking time bomb. I remember Marissa Tameh talking about it in my cousin Vinnie when she's like slamming her foot on the ground. And she's like, all I can hear is tick, tick, tick. And I'd be like, what is she talking about? And then suddenly you hear it one time.

And then once you hear it, you can't not hear it. It is actually a tick. Like this. Time is running out. And then I thought, well, okay, I'm just going to be very honest and talk about it with Lily because you've been a mother since we were so young. Do you think that I should, if the opportunity arises,

do you think I should be a mother? I think you'd make a great mom. I think you need to figure out if you want to do it with someone else or if you want to do it on your own and if you want to do it on your own then we can start moving

we can do that no drag me to the sperm clinic I know you said you watched that Kardashian's episode and you were like hmm I mean yes I'll call you when I'm ready for that part of the journey. I mean, as you know, I got an extraordinary offer

from some people who I won't name. Yeah, probably good. And that might really take the piss. Not a good start. Very eligible people, very eligible people who wanted to discuss having a baby with me. The most unusual phone call I've ever had. But it kind of just made me think,

like, wait a minute, regardless of do I want to do it like this? do I even want to be a mother? And if I do, would this be a viable way to have a baby with two men that can't have a baby, obviously, but we would raise it. They said you could have naught to 50% involvement. And I just suddenly thought,

I don't think I could have a baby and have three and a half percent involvement. I don't think I'm wired that way, but maybe someone is, but I just don't think I'd be able to do it. They did have a really nice house, though. With a fool. Ooh.

Go on, do it. A lateral water swimming pool. I was like, oh, okay, I'm seeing summers there. That's a bit of me. This is good. But I could do it on my own as well, you know. I could. It probably, if at like 44, I haven't had a baby, I think I could do it on my own.

I think I would quite like to do it on my own, actually. I'm not so scared of that anymore. It doesn't look like this awful secondary option. I'd like to be financially secure to have some fun with that. I just can't relive what I had in childhood, which is skint. um single mother. Hmm. That was hard.

Let's not do that again. I did that in my lifetime once already. Let's not do that. I get up at 6 o'clock. I feed the dog. I let the dog out in the garden for a shit. Make myself a coffee. And then I wake them up at 6.30.

and now they used to come down for like just before seven now it's like 25 past seven and they're meant to be out of the door at 7.30 like they are pushing it. Yeah. Remember how much you needed those extra 10 minutes though? I used to watch the big breakfast clock

just like going later and later I'd be like, it's okay. I could get there in half an hour and then by the end you're like, I can get there at seven minutes. Like no, you can't. No, you can't. Get the fuck up our bed. Also, now I get like, now I get like text because Ethel's got an Apple Watch. So is Marnie, but she doesn't really use it because she's too busy reading books on the stock market.

But my Ethel will send me like a tech, you know, she'll be like, yeah, I'm down in 10 minutes. And then another one in 10 minutes, down in another five minutes. And then another one in five minutes go, mom, I don't really feel very well. I'm like actually if I could If I had a direct line of communication with my mum at that time Well I was at boarding school at that time in their age But yeah you didn't have the option of bunking Not bunking but asking for the day off

No but texting texting your mum Like I feel sick got a headache from the same house Yeah but I didn't text mum I just went next door to her room in Powers Terrace but I did often would be like, Mom, she'd be like, what? And I was like, I just don't feel good. Did you ever do this when you?

I would tell my mom that I was feeling sick and then I'd be like, you know, come up. And then when I heard her on the stairs, I'd jump out of bed, put my head against the radiator for about 10 seconds. Oh my God, Lily. And then jump back into bed hoping that it was still hot. Fake fever.

very good very good God you're such a manipulative genius another life hack if you're wanting to bunk off school head on the radiators

head on radiator how long would you say it would take little to give a really convincing fever I don't know I don't think it really ever worked but I'd say like 10 seconds yeah I think after that you might hurt yourself you want to give it like 20

but I'm saying I could hear her feet on the stairs so I'd have to be pretty quick you know God, I know that Alison and my mum knew we were little shit but before Missed me but bloody hell all those little extras they're really finding out that was my creativity babe that was just me like you know best believe telling stories

yeah that was my storyteller side okay okay obviously don't stick your head against a radiator because that is dangerous and you could injure yourself quite badly don't want anyone burning themselves on my account yeah not on not on our watch so please don't do that wow isn't it nice to take a walk down miss me memory lane I had forgotten about so much of that, but we know what my memory's like. Anyway, that's all for today's best bits, but we'll be back on Monday with another best of. This time, it's a sex special for Listen Bitch. Yep,

we're finally doing it. Compilation of all of our sexiest moments, tips and tales from the past year. Plus, we're going to feature some exclusive audio from the live shows in March, never heard before outside of the Hackney Empire. Lucky you. I, for one, can't wait. Me and Keats will see you there. Bye! Thanks for listening to Miss Me with Lily Allen and Mikita Oliver. This is a Persephonica production for BBC Sounds.

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