Mission To Zyxx - Dew or Dew Not, There Are No Dice

Episode Date: April 22, 2026

It's the MaxFunDrive! Please support us at https://maximumfun.org/joinzyxx In this installment of our DnD adventure, the changeling sorcerer Casseidi Mossborn dumps some serious lore on the Legumies. If you dare listen, prepare for contemplated roundness, angry silence, and cities with sequels! Thanks to Zyxxcord member Powerline for making the lovely map used in the episode. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/joinzyxx Lovingly researched and sound-described transcripts are embedded in every episode page on missiontozyxx.space!

Hello there. It's Seth here with everyone. Hey. Hello. Hi. Hello. The creators of Mission to Zix and the young old DERF Chronicles. And Mission to D6. Okay.

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for a second so you can click that link now. If you're thinking of yourself, oh, I should, yeah, I should do that. Just take this second to actually click on that link. Or if you're deciding not to, you can use the second however you wish. Thank you so much for considering it. Thanks everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Love you. Keep it fresh. Thank you. Friends, listeners, creatures, welcome back to episode five of Mission to D6. Oh, wow. What a tangled web we have a well been here.

We're back with the Lagumi's crew on route to adventure with glorificus sting swallow, actually, Cassidy Mossbore. That makes sense what you said. Winston, you'll make your entrance later. Oh, I know. Oh, yeah, I think you should give some recap of, Not just for us. Well, Winston could do that.

I'll let Samiz do that when he shows up. Oh, perfect. So the Lagumi's crew is headed north on the great mountain road, away from Glorificas' cabin. And you've set out for adventure with Kasidi after he revealed to you a number of sort of disturbing revelations. Do you guys remember what any of them were? That the Order of the Griffin was tied up with one,

Rangus, the wizard. Yes. That's right. Yes. Rangis was a member of the order. Mm, there is. Also, Glerfika's Sting Swallow died or was killed. And, yes.

Cossidy Mossbourne, the Changeling was accused of that murder. That's right. But he says, nay. But he's a liar. He has been known to lie. There's a book, right? Yeah, there's a book. There's a Ligumachron book.

So Cassidy knows a lot about the lagoon, presumably. Yeah. So as you're headed north, Dwayne is pulling the cart. Larry's on his poodle. You're all sort of making your way through the very large forest that runs along the mountains here. The Bringlepool Forest is where you are. So Glorific is regales you with a little bit of backstory,

his rich backstory, a little bit of context for what's going on. He says, The Luminous Order of the Griffin is an ancient cabal of wizard. from across the nine kingdoms, whose purpose for centuries has been to seek out knowledge of Touluria and the mysteries of the universe, alternate planes of existence,

ancient secrets, magics outside of our understanding. Glurficus was a member of the order and he'd just discovered the legume while pouring over the artifacts from the great and glorious city at the foot of Mount Dew. The city is, of course,

Dutopia, too, which is the sequel to Dutopia, which, as you know, was destroyed by the great eruption of Mount Doom many centuries ago. He learned in that great eruption that the lagoon was injected from Mount Dew. It's a very successful city, so they felt a need to make a sequel. Well, the first one was so good that they decided to make another one after the eruption. Many say the second city not as good as the first one, lacked the originality of the first.

It's successful, equally successful. But yes, still very successful. It's a little creatively bankrupt. Just not new. Just not new. Exactly. Not as good. Yes.

The box inside their office was enormous. In any case, he discovered that the legume was ejected from Mount Dew in this great eruption for centuries. No one knew what the significance of the legume was, let alone what it was capable of. Then, glorificus sting swallow discovered hidden deep in the foothills of the great mountains, an ancient library only known to a forgotten order of monks known as the Zimas. And in this library, he found text, explaining that the legume was an artifact of untold power. It required a warden, who was pure of heart and great of patience,

for in its active state it was not only powerful, but incredibly obnoxious. But Glorificus discovered something else. The legume had the capacity for great evil as well. The bearer of the legume could sway the alignment of the legume in his favor. Cassidy, are you saying there's some sort of deep connection between mountain dew and zima i mean there's no no there's not any you know legal connections okay no famously zima is a few degrees cooler of course wow of course it's higher in the mountains obviously

yes naturally what arcane text did you call that from i have studied for many years I have studied at the knee of many powerful wizards and monks to know this. We all would say holding under that fact is a great use of your brain. Thank you. Important. What a service. Larry, Larry, you have sort of a disdain for the seriousness of Quariel, but I assure you, his knowledge of history and religion of this area is unmatched.

Which reminds me, Quirial, you failed to recognize any of the order's emblems or scrolls. or other, you know, accoutrements at Glorificus' cabin. But I assure you, almost no one knows of the order. It is a hidden cabal that is unknown to almost everyone, even though the members are well-known themselves. For example, did you know that Rangus, of course, was a wizard of very high-renowned at Castle Braid? But his position in the order was unknown to all but the order itself.

I am familiar with this wizard, as much distaste as I have for him. Now listen, Rangus and Glorificus were not always so different. In fact, they were close friends, both powerful wizards who had been inducted into the order after over a century of noble and righteous study and contributions to Tulloria's magical and scientific knowledge. When Glorificus found information about the lagoon, he hurried back to the citadel to pass his findings onto the order. But first, he sought the counsel of his good friend Rangis. He explained the legume's power for both good and evil. and Rangis turned on him and murdered him in his sanctum.

What? Whoa! What? What is it, Dwayne? I just, uh, sorry, I got to put the wagon down for a second. I just feel like, that's a real, that's a real twist, you know? I see that coming. Yes.

Why kill someone you're really good friends with, you know? In his own sanctum. Good question. Why would it one person murder another person after the second person described how a thing they found could be used for untold evil and unbelievable power. What do you think the motivation of that person? Sorry, Dwayne, George is trying to devour our provisions. Oh, George.

Hey, no, you got to watch that squirrel. He's going to eat. Sorry, sorry. We'll continue. Rangis was attempted by the power of the lagoon and turned on his friend, Glorificus. I saw it happen. I was there.

And you didn't do anything to, wait, got to put this down again. You didn't do anything to stop him from murdering? I'm not nearly, I'm not remotely as powerful as Rangifax. I stood no chance against him. Oh. Tis true. He was a mighty wizard. We bid him.

But I ran to the citadel to tell the order everything that I saw. But somehow Rangis was there before me. He had already shown them in a vision in his seeing staff, Glorificus' murder, but in the vision, it was I who slew him. I knew, of course, the order would never believe my story over that of a member of their own, so I fled. Only I knew where Glorificus had hidden the lagoon.

I rushed back to Glorificus' study Recovered the legume and took it hundreds of leagues away As far as I can travel by steed To the southern shore of Glenaren Glenaren of course I know you know this We know. We're in Glenaren We're in Glenaren. You know about Glenarren, yes, of course you do

Because this is Glenarren, the fourth kingdom that we are in right now The fourth of nine kingdoms The nine great kingdoms of Deloria Of course in an accordia they call us the sixth kingdom Because they count from where they are But the six Anacordia's all crucked up though They don't

Yeah I mean there's a reason they've been at war With the rest of the kingdoms For centuries Yes famously Anacordia don't want none If you got guns Hun

Famously Famously As I said Whalefirst This is what I hear In the meeting posts Of various regions Of course

Of course Now, I'm sorry, I should continue or I'll lose my train of thought. I can't imagine how. So I took the lagoon, right, to the southern shore of Glenarine, where, as you certainly know, Quariel, is where the great Rhodian temple of the fourth kingdom is. It's a glorious tribute. Yes, yes. To the light of Rhodos, the sunlighter. I knew, of course, that the Archimandrite at the Rhodian monastery could be trusted.

He was noble and pure, so I swore him to secrecy, and I commanded him, never to tell anyone, not even you, Quariel, of who had given it to him. I told him that Lagoon must be returned to Mount Dew from whence it came, to keep the order from descending into evil and chaos, and bringing the whole world to ruin. That was nearly two years ago. Is this a casual anecdote just to pass the time? If you're paying attention, you'll probably benefit from it,

but it's okay to tune out, honestly. Well, because if we're all doing stories, I have one about this funny misunderstanding I had the other day. Oh, yes, yes. This sounds amazing. Okay, we can pull over for a minute. Go ahead. No, no, you can let him keep going.

I have questions about where he was hiding. Don't forget. This sounds wonderful. Yes, it's funny. It's where I'm standing. Oh, it's crazy. In the barn. I mean, there's really not much else to tell.

That was like two years ago. I spent, you know, months in hiding, trying to clear my name, try to find proof that I could bring to the order of innocence. But, you know. You never did? No, I never did because here's the thing. In those months of hiding, I learned something more disturbing.

What? There was no investigation of Glorificus' death, only silence from the order. No announcement, no mourning, no outrage. Does not that point to the most disturbing truth of all, that there is deep corruption in the order. How far it goes, I do not know, but I must return to the citadel to investigate. That is what I need your help with. I need muscle. I need brains. I need sleight of hand. I need magics, all of which you can provide.

Boy, you're really lacking in a lot of areas. I have some of that stuff, but I'm only one person. You said you needed magics. Yeah. I need other magics than the magics. I, Aquario, what's the deal? I am merely slightly suspicious of someone who changes their name as frequently as you, Cassidy Mossbourne. And you ask for a slight of hand, and I have very slight hands. That's what I'm talking about. We need someone small to sneak in through a little, cracks and stuff. That could be you.

Yeah, I could do. I can sneak in time. And Bucket is, of course, master of many spells, though it seems she has sworn some sort of angry oath of silence. That's my bad. Bookett and Larry are not on speaking terms right now. But normally that means you don't speak to one person. That's... No, vow of silence. She's known for extremes. I'm learning in our budding romance slash marriage. Yeah, I think you could have asked any of us. I already know that. Slash marriage.

just in the last couple days. Not great to put the marriage second after the slash. Oh. Well, I mean, it's a progression. The story about the barn misunderstanding is the reason why book it's a little of quiet these days. Oh. Now, listen, listen, Quario, I understand that you're skeptical. I understand you probably all are.

I'm happy to answer any questions you have. Did you do it? I need to prove myself trustworthy to you. Did you actually do it? Do you want to just tell us? Did I, no, Glorificus was my mentor, the one constant in my life for decades. Show us your hands. Which one?

Are any fingers crossed? Both. No, I don't cry. You think that would do? Fine. Look. Okay. Okay. And now, Larry, show us your hands. I want to know how slight they are. Look at their, like little. Oh, nice. Wow. You can almost see through them.

My, my. Yes. These hands haven't seen a day's work. I know sometimes I'd bend down and take a bite out of them because they look like fluffy little marshmallows. Oh. Wait, are they slight or are they marshmallow like? They're slight, I mean, not thick marshmallow.

Like a minis. Like minis, little minis. Yes. A little treat. Decadent. But here's a quandary for you, adventurous. Yes. Here's a quandary for you, and I know not the answer.

Why now? Why now is the order attacking me. Surely they could have tracked me to my location by now, but only now have they decided to pounce. What has changed? Hmm.

Hmm. We found the orb we won't tell you much about. The what? The orb. You've got the orb. It's a little orb. What little orb?

An orb is like a little rock, but very round. Almost perfectly round. Perfectly round. Weird. One moment. Legumi's only aside. Okay.

Round them up, Lagumis. Gassidy, earmuffs. You stay over there. What say ye? Shall we show this orb to the changeling? Booker, do you want to say something about it? Well, won't even nod. Committed to her oath.

As you are huddled, coming around to bend in the mountain road, you see a person walking, sort of striving. Is it grandma? It's probably grandma. Somehow walking way faster than any Tolorian should walk. He's sort of like imagine like the keep on trucking guy, but he's going like 30 miles an hour. He's really trucking.

And as he gets closer, you see a familiar face. It's Sam's walking so fast towards you guys. Oh. Over here. He looks terrible. Wow, that is a fast guard. He's moving faster than a horse. but he looks like someone just

beat the absolute piss out of him. Oh, no. Somehow his loot is uninjured. Hello. Samsey, surely you have had some misfortune to. No, no.

I had my open Michael night. You know, it was... And the audience revolted against you for the quality. No, no, no. Not so hot. It was great. It was great. It was great. I was killing.

Everybody loved what I was doing. You were also murdering? No, no, no. I was just, it's a showbiz term, Dwayne, but I was, I was doing really well. And yet your jerkin is covered in blood. Yes. As I was...

Is that an industry term, covered in blood? No, no. It's not. Where... No. I was, you know, doing really well. And then, um, remember the bug bear that I cast vicious mockery on?

Way back, you know, in our last adventure. You really caught his number. Yeah, and he ran off into the woods. Well, he showed up with this strange wizard. I'm just going to put in here. Sorry, I'm Cassidy Mossbourne. Great to meet you. What are you talking about?

Sorry. I just get in on this. I just, I hate the leaf drop, but this feels like important information. Don't worry. Don't worry. We didn't replace you with this guy. Yeah, is he a bar? Can not. Hold a tune.

Okay, good. No, I can't. I'm basically tone deaf. Perfect. Anyway, these guys and red robes came in, and this giant eagle came and ripped Maxine Pickles in two. Maxie Pickles? Yeah.

I went to prom with her. Really? Oh, wow. She was ripped. Oh, no. Book it. Come back. Oh.

I'll book it. Now, it's not about, I wasn't trying to say I'm sad. I mean, a little sad. Anyway, I was frozen. at one point into an icicle. Oh, wow. And then... Oh.

That's not an industry term either. No, when you're on stage and freeze. None of its industry terms. You sort of led with the jargon, so I think we're all a little confused. There was one mention of industry. Killing it is doing well. But now you're talking about people actually being killed so... Okay.

Who is this guy? Samsey's... We also encountered red-robed enemies and a giant eagle. Okay, well, they wanted to find me because... of this orb. Wait, what? They said, did I have an orb? The order was looking for this same

artifact that you hold now? I guess. We'll have to find, Bookett. Book it, unfortunately, still, I think has it, so. Oh. Bard, Bard. Tell me everything. Tell me everything about this wizard

who attacked you. She was... Oh, look, it's their first aside together. Look at those two. You should all actually hear this. This is all sort of important. Oh, okay. Tell me everything.

She was tall, she was bald. She had ice power, so I called her. I really, I really, this is great. I said, hey, I said, hey, I said, hey, ice queen. Okay, that probably didn't go over very well because she is literally an ice queen. She's an ice sorceress from the second kingdom. It's not going to, you literally just described what is awesome about her, so that probably didn't go. And this open Michael's night is supposed to hone your skill in some way?

It's a community. Yeah, it sounds like a total bard bath. Well, I, I mean, I pay a couple of pieces of... That's an industry turn. That's an industry turn. No, it's not... Wait, were you beginning to say you pay to perform? Well, I mean, it's a...

Yeah, it's like a cover that I... Well, I admit, some of it... You pay a cover as a performer? Well, no, I mean, it's, you know, it's sort of a drink situation as well. You're going out and asking people if they like barred music on the street? Well, that is part of it. of it. You have to do, you know, want to hear some Bard music? They've been seen on Bard's. Do you like

to laugh? No? Come to the open mic back. Do you like Epic Tales? You're in the center of town ringing the bell, trying to get people to it. That's called a bell ringer show or a bringer show. A bee ringer, a bee ringer. A bee ringer. Now that's an industry term. Only the six of us will understand. Not very exasible. No, no, I'm certain that term is universal, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Listen, Bart, what you have told me chills my blood to the core. I mixed metaphors there, but it shows me to the bone. I was actually chilled to the core. I kind of, I think, maybe died at one point. Condolences. Yes, but I mean metaphorically. Who you are describing is Thespedopia, a very powerful wizard from the second kingdom. She is one of the few members of the order who I trusted may still yet have honorable

intentions. And if what you're saying is true, if she has fallen for the lies of Rangus and his ilk, then we're all in trouble. Show me this orb you're talking about. It must carry great import if it means something to the order. Booket! Booket is launching magic fire at trees over there. Yeah. Well, Larry, I think you're going to have to go apologize to Booket for bringing up your prom date. Yes. Okay, okay, I got this. This is my hardest.

We won't listen. We won't listen to whatever it is you're talking about. Can I, is there, can I roll the dice for apologizing? Is that something? You can take a 10 on that, I think you can just do it. I suspect from there it would be a deception rule. Yeah. Book it, yes, I'm so sorry.

Maxine Pickles was nothing to me. We did go to prom. I have a lot of stories about what happened that night. But about the barn misunderstanding, it was a simple mistake who I was lying with. The barns are crazy. Is he? Trying to make it worse?

It feels as though, yes. I think he's bad at apologizing. He should have rolled. Anyway, I guess I know you want me to say I'm sorry. He's taking a two. But, you know, you feel bad, and I'm sorry. you're mad at me. Wow, still no response.

Yikes. Very quiet. Very. Maybe I should go get the orb from Bucket. Yeah, I think so. Well, I'm assuming this guy is trustworthy, since you all decided to follow. We don't know. We don't know that.

Samezies. I need more information about this battle. Did you search the bodies? Did you look for anything of value on them? How did Maxine look at her top half when she died? Uh-oh. Larry just lost his eyebrows. Wow.

Did you interrogate any survivors about what they wanted or what they were doing there? No. We were just happy to be alive. Again, an eagle flew through the window, ripped somebody apart. I was frozen. Did you ask the eagle which Iri he hailed from? What? No.

He left. Thespedopia? Yes, Thespedopia. We stabbed her a few times and she disappeared. Uh-oh. And then the other guys were dead or ran away. Did anyone run out like a coward and not come back at all? There was this one guy who tried to pick pocket the bad guys on the way out.

It was truly wild. What are you talking about? Do you understand the import of this situation? Not really, no. Yes, there was representation at the open mic. It was a big deal. Oh, there was? There was scouts there?

Well, we're not sure. There was a woman who was not a performer who was there. That's just called an audience member. That's a regular audience member. Well, maybe that. You don't know what that is. Perhaps a very supportive partner. That could have been paralyzed in some way.

Perhaps by ill magics. Yeah, frozen perhaps. Okay. Yes. I have the orb. I have the orb. I was able to get it away from Bucket. From Bucket.

By promising one thing, Larry, come here. Mm-hmm. Yes? Ta! Oh, ow! Okay. Sorry, I promised, Bookett, I would slap you. Otherwise, I could not get the orb from her.

Does that account as an apology? Am I good? I certainly doubt it. No? Okay, I'll work on them. Yes. Cassidy takes the orb from you, and he says, Where did you get this?

We found it in a crate full of melted objects labeled Castle braid. And a look of realization passes over his face, and he goes pale. Do you think they know each other? Yeah, that's an orb. Dwayne, that's an or. Yeah, Dwayne, it's a rock. Yeah. And he hands it back to you and he says,

All my plans must be abandoned. What? Now that this is in your possession, I pose too great a danger to you. I cannot do this. This is an artifact that I thought was legend. Glorificus thought it lost or returned to the bottom of the great Barron's Lake

where it was found. But not only does it exist, but Rangus had it in his possession. Hmm. Mm-hmm. Clearly it was in Rangus's sanctum. So Rangus either stole this orb the same way he stole the legume, or it was given to him by another member of the order. What is this thing called?

The orb? Well, it's been known by many names, but... Oh, here we go. The ancient cemite texts refer to it as the orb of Thracus. That is what it was called. the texts that I was reading. The rakis. That's with an R.

Therate, T-H-R. A-Y-K-I-S. I'm just trying, you know, when we, eventually, when this becomes a song, a tale, I want to get a right. Yeah, just trying to get the details. He had a really good open mic.

Yeah, I did. I definitely did. So don't ask anybody, don't ask anybody about it, but I did. Listen, my friends, it is no longer safe or wise to head directly to the Citadel. Not with the orb in our possession. I must make a difficult decision here. The order is after me, Cicide, and or glorificus, where, you know, however I am guised.

Well, but they're still only after one person. Yes, of course. Well, but you said two. What, okay. You're inflating your numbers, so I say. Okay, fine, yes, fine. It's no longer safe to be with me, and it is no longer safe for me to be with the orb. For if they find me and they find the orb, then all is truly,

lost. I must seek out the council of other contacts. But in the meantime, you must ensure that the orb does not fall into the hands of the order. Do whatever you must to keep it from them. The lagoon is very powerful. Currently, it is held in the burning embers of Castle Braid. It's only a matter of time before that fire goes out. And if whoever has the legume, when it is returned to Tuloria, also has the orb, I have no idea what could happen. So, I must have a matter. So, I must have a matter of Just leave you here. Wow. But we were following you.

Yeah, you were taking it someplace. Okay, listen, I don't, what do you want me to be here as a target? As a beacon to say, hey, here's the orb, and here's these schmucks following me around. Kill them all, take the orb, be my guest. Is that what you want? Well, you want to give me the orb, and then I'll be a big walking bullseye with the artifact that the most powerful wizards and Toloria are looking for? Okay, but where do you propose we go?

Who do you propose we talk to? Yes. I don't want to know. I don't want to know. You got to figure it out for yourself. If I know and they try to get it out of me, then we're all crocked, right? This is like a guru abandoning his cult. Wait, what does this thing even do? Yeah, other than be perfectly round. Very round.

We get it. It's right. There are lots of things that are round. Like what? A bocce ball? An orange. An orange is nowhere near perfectly round. I mean, by nature's standards, it's pretty round. A rain droplet A raindroplet Rainsly not round on the bottom They famously have their shape of a drop

I think you will find the other end A point end Decidedly not round The blown bubble of a fool Perfectly round What? No no no Wonky wobbly weird

Difficult to measure Fine yes it's great It's super round congratulations That's not what's powerful about it Okay Well why don't you tell us what's so powerful I don't know Well, then we are left with

But it's roundness to Compton Plate, sir. Oddly round. Yes. Mm. Now listen, here's the deal. When I found you initially, I said to myself, oh, here are these six adventurers who were able to, you know, defeat Rangus,

one of my arch nemeses. Perhaps they have what it takes to get me into the citadel so I can root out the evil from the order of the Griffin. But now that I know the truth, that you have an object of untold power, I don't want to do that plan anymore. So what I want you to do is figure out something to do with it while I figure out what the crook that orb even does or is. Okay, so what you're saying is we have to decide now what we're going to do next. Oh, I'm sorry, is that a crime? Is that a big burden for you to make a choice on your own? Becauseiety Mossport has anyone ever given you the feedback that you are a little difficult to be around sometimes?

I'm so good because I'm leaving. I'm leaving right now. Okay. Bye. Listen, listen, I'm not going to just turn you loose in the Bringlepool Forest by yourself. You just said you were going to leave. I know you don't know your way around here. Here's a map. Study it. What you need to do is act with intention, act with consciousness, and make a decision that will help. you and the rest of Tulloria. Keep this orb away from the order, at whatever cost. He produces a tattered map and hands it to Quario. Very well.

I shall take this charge and guide us straight and true by Rudos' light. Quariel. Yes. This is a map I've been using as I've tracked your whereabouts over the past few months. But it's a rudimentary map. You shall find no route. which you should follow. What?

But it does mark the location of a few places which may be of interest to you. Very well. I shall seek Rodos' counsel in which direction we shall follow. Oh, no, we're going to pray on it. For surely his wisdom.

Sounds like it. We'll guide us. We're always going to go toward the sun. To the most virtuous path. If you must know, you shall find in the morning the east be the most virtuous direction. Right, yeah.

Is what I'm saying, chasing the sun all day? And then in the afternoon, the west. Don't follow that. You're going to be going around in circles, friend. Yeah. Listen, I shall make some stops throughout the Fourth Kingdom to ask some contacts that I have about more information about this. You keep talking about context.

What are you talking about? Wizards, luminaries, anthropologists. I'm going to be visiting a cleric in Gonkville. Going down to River Spork to talk to a couple of mages who can sort of conjure images. What deity does this Gunkville cleric worship? Surely not Routos. I don't know. I don't ask people about their politics.

It's not really something I try to get up. Oh, wow. Not important to you, huh? Well, you know. Must be nice. Must be nice. Well, when you're connected to different planes of existence, like I am as a wizard, it's sort of like the deities of Toulori are like fine, but they're not to be all indol, as it were.

You're above it then. Yeah. No, I wouldn't say I'm above it. Convenient. Convenient for you. You have the privilege of not having to care about it. Is that what you're saying? This guy probably doesn't vote, I think.

For our kings? He doesn't vote for our kings. It's out of a monarchy system. Where are you voting? Me? Yes. I write what I want to happen and put it in a tree stump. Ah, okay.

Tree mail. Can I just impart one more piece of advice to you? The sorcerer you faced on the path to my cabin was of the fifth level of the order of the griffin. Thespotope is a level three. Basically, the way that it works is that there's the high griffin, and every member of the aura has two apprentices. So, level two has two in it.

Level three has four in it, and then level one, two, three, level four has eight in it. Like it's like a multi-level type. It's sort of like a pyramid shape, yes, if you want. But it's basically, so... And you buy in at the top, and then you have to, like, get other...

I can open Michael Knight, basically. It's a little bit, yeah, you sort of had to pay to play a little bit. But they're all members of the order. They've been entrusted with the guardianship of the knowledge of Toloria. But some are more important than others, and some are powerful and some are sort of shitheads. Despidopio is the real deal. There's no chance you actually killed her. She would have left long before you had any chance of doing that.

She sort of disappeared. Yes, exactly. She would have. She would sort of puff of red smoke. She's gone. Exactly. That's exactly what. happen. Yes. So, Cassidy, there's still no evidence you are leaving. I'm leaving. And I don't want to tell

you where I'm going, and I don't want you to tell me where you're going. That's how it's safest for all of us. You're in luck because we don't know. And you already said you're going to Dongtville. My friend, well, yes, but you know where Donkville is? No. It's not on the map. I'll tell you that much. I always end up in Donkville, if you like. Yeah, we've all been there from time to time. Yes, I spent a fortnight in Donkville one night. so to speak. Focus all your efforts on keeping the orb safe and secret.

I promise I shall return to you once I have information for you. Okay. Okay. Great. Cassidy lifts up his staff. Bright light appears and he disappears into thin air.

Well, everyone, it's good to see you. I will say, I was worried that there was some nonsense that you were up to and I was completely justified. We can hug. Let's hug.

We can hug, sure. Let's hug, come on. I'm so tired. So you guys pull open the map. It looks something like this. And for you, listeners, we'll be posting this map on mission to zix.space in the mission to D6 section as well as link to it in the show notes. Here is the fourth kingdom of Toloria. Can you see that?

Yes. Here's where you are right now. you're in the Bringapore Forest around right here, just north of Glorificus's cabin. Here's Castle Brade down here, and hundreds of leagues away over here on the western shore of Glenarren. If you all remember, was where you met up with Quariel, way back in your first appearance as Lagumi's Mission is X, episode 419, for those of you following along. This is where Quiriel got the Lagu Meagli's. And he was headed north to Mount Dew, which of course is in the mountains just next to Dutopia 2.

And he was on the way on this great plain where Korm was slain. Yes, it is a common mispronunciation of Korm to say Karm. Dutopia 2 was where the Lugumacron was originally found in where there's a Zima Temple up here somewhere where all of the texts about the lagoon and presumably the orb were. so you could always go up here and try to track some of that stuff down. Here's Lake Fresca, which Mountain Dew drains into, and the Citadel is all the way over here. So this is hundreds of leagues away from where you are.

Okay. Oh, here's Ebum Lulu where Gigli is from. This is the dwarf kingdom where Gigli hells. These are the transparent mountains here. Edisport is the port town that would get you over to the other continent. And this is the Twilight Sea between the two. continents. This is the Ninth Kingdom, which Bucket was the princess

of, but she abandoned her crown. For love. So you have a couple options. You have a lot of options. You can go wherever you want. Do you guys want to discuss what your options are? Yeah, I guess is there a question of like, what is the longer term goal? He's just telling

us not to get this thing found, which is just like, go hide in a cave and don't talk to anyone. To hide in a cave or deprive us of the light of world is the sunlight. Right. Surely it would be a mistake to not let his divine radiance enlighten us. I mean, it is part of me that yearns to just walk straight to that citadel and say, is this what you meant? Well, you are the one with the map. So...

Your map. Well, sort of our map, but yes, I will hold it. Did Cassidy say what his original plan was at the Citadel before realizing he had the orb? His original plan was that he was going to try to get a band together to go to the citadel and do sort of a heist thing where he was going to try to figure out who was good and evil in the order and expose the corrupt members of the order to the high griffin who is the most powerful wizard in the order but now that he knows that Thespidopia is in on it and they know that the orb exists and that you guys have it he thinks that plant sucks now and there's no castle braid like the lagoon is not going to be cooled down anytime

soon. It's just, it's burning for who knows how long. Yeah, it's looked the same for basically like months now. But you want to make sure that whatever you're doing has been done by the time that thing burns out. Anyone else have a hanker in to go to Donkville? Just me? Wasting away again in Donkville? I mean, Quario, would we be safe at the monastery? For a time. until the rumor of the orb spread. But who's going around telling people these rumors? When you hold a powerful object, like the Ligumacron or the orb, word spreads of its own accord.

But bookets not even talking right now. Tight-lipped. She did try to give it to that painter, the guy who did your portrait. True. Yes, I fear, regardless of our intent, word will spread of the orb. So we're just north of the cabin. Yeah. Yeah.

You could go up to Dutopia, too. Yeah, we could do it country cool up there. Wow. Yeah, I feel like if there's that temple up there, we should try to find it, right? The hidden library. Yeah, let's do our own research. Let's do our own research? Exactly.

Oh. Yes, it seems as though seeking more knowledge about the orb is the most beneficial path. So perhaps continuing along this road to Mount Dew and Dutopia 2. Yes. It will prove most fruitful. Yeah. Well, Dutopia prove fruitful or another type of flavor? You're right.

I am thinking of Fruitopia, which existed for only a short period of time a few decades past. Yes. But had you the opportunity to visit Fruitopia in its time, it was quite wonderful. Yes. Do we need to have seen the first Utopia in order to get Tutopia 2? You can get up to speed pretty quickly at Dutopia 2.

I mean a mountain voyage seems fun. That's a classic dwarf sentiment. A mountain voyage seems fun. Boy, a classic dwarf over here. Yes. Bucket's nodding, so. All right, everyone back in the wagon, let's go. Great.

Just a wee, what, 900 miles. walk. Yeah. You can ride a little. There's lots of stuff that'll happen between now and then. That's true. We have an entire epic adventure to unfold. How'd you get Bookett to nod so much?

I think perhaps when you look, Larry, she's acting aloof. Yeah, she's doing a lot of kind of pointing at you and kind of going, you know, and like. Yeah, but that's our love language. It's a little flirt. Yeah, that could mean anything. Doesn't seem good. She wants to neck.

No, that's... She wants to suck on those. slight marshmallow hands. Exactly. It slip right out of your mouth. They're so little and wispy. None of this sounds right to me. I like this.

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