Modern Wisdom - #816 - 2.25M Q&A - The Manosphere, Mike Israetel & Overcoming Insecurities

Episode Date: July 25, 2024

I hit 2.25 million Subscribers on YouTube!! To celebrate, I asked for questions from YouTube, Twitter and Instagram, so here’s another 90 minutes of me trying to answer as many as possible. As alway...s there’s some great questions in here about my single life, my new project with Mike Israetel, and how I overcome insecurities. Expect to learn what the future of vlogs on the channel looks like, what I think about clickbait on YouTube, when the most challenging chapter in my life was, what I’m currently saying no to, what I’m looking forward to on my tour to Australia, how to break out of self-destructive habits, whether I'm scared of American wildlife and much more… Sponsors: See discounts for all the products I use and recommend: https://chriswillx.com/deals Get a 20% discount on Nomatic’s amazing luggage at https://nomatic.com/modernwisdom (use code MW20) Get $150 discount on Plunge’s amazing sauna or cold plunge at https://plunge.com (use code MW150) Get 10% discount on all Gymshark’s products at https://bit.ly/sharkwisdom (use code MW10)  Extra Stuff: Get my free reading list of 100 books to read before you die: https://chriswillx.com/books Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic: https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom Episodes You Might Enjoy: #577 - David Goggins - This Is How To Master Your Life: https://tinyurl.com/43hv6y59 #712 - Dr Jordan Peterson - How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs: https://tinyurl.com/2rtz7avf #700 - Dr Andrew Huberman - The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain: https://tinyurl.com/3ccn5vkp - Get In Touch: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What's happening people? Welcome back to the show. My guest today is me. I hit 2.25 million subscribers on YouTube and to celebrate I asked for questions from YouTube and Twitter and Instagram, so here is another 90 minutes of me trying to answer as many as possible. And as always, there are some very insightful questions and some slightly uncomfortable ones about my single life, my new project with Mike Isretel, and how I overcome insecurities.
Starting point is 00:00:29 I expect to learn what the future of vlogs on the channel looks like, what I think about clickbait on YouTube, when the most challenging chapter in my life was, what I'm currently saying no to, what I'm looking forward to on my Australia tour, how to break out of self-destructive habits, whether I'm scared of American wildlife, and much more. You might've seen that I recently went on tour in the UK, Ireland, Dubai, Canada, and the US, and the entire time for a full month, I didn't check a single bag in,
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Starting point is 00:04:13 It is a 2.25 million subscriber Q&A episode. As you can tell, I'm not in my usual recording setup. I'm here in Bozeman, Montana. And I wish that I could tell you that there was a beautiful vista of sheep grazing and cows chilling out in the mountains, but it's a building site and there's some mountains in the distance. I've also had to cobble together this
Starting point is 00:04:39 by stealing an office chair from the conference room and a table from the breakfast room in the Hilton here in Bozeman. So I'm not going to be there when this goes live. Say what I want. Anyway, I asked the questions on Instagram and Twitter and YouTube community and we got tons. Lots of them were very similar. The guys tried to compile them so that they're chunked together and there are many. So let's get into it. First off, Quincy O'Beng, can you share a time when you realized
Starting point is 00:05:10 that worrying less actually led to better results? I would struggle to think of a time when worrying more led to better results. I understand that we can sometimes have this sort of implicit assumption that our performance is fueled by a worry somehow that it helps us to pay attention. In ways it focuses us focuses are precision and ensures that things don't get missed but i. and ensures that things don't get missed. But I'm really struggling to think of a time when worrying led to better results. Can lead to small increases in performance,
Starting point is 00:05:51 but results probably include more than just what was the outcome. It's also what was the experience of doing it like? How did I appear? And when you think about what, how does worrying make you feel when it comes to performing and trying to achieve results, you're all uptight.
Starting point is 00:06:07 This sort of very hard, grippy, tense sensation mentally in your body. And even Excel, professional Excel people, accountants and coders, they will probably not want to grip tightly onto things. They will probably want to try and find flow, I would imagine. So I think finding ease and grace is always going to be better than worrying your way through things. That being said, I'm patient zero for worrying an awful lot.
Starting point is 00:06:39 And one of the first times that I can think that I did it on the show was with Robert Green. So I massively respect him and he's this big intellectual powerhouse and who the fuck am I? I'm just some ex club promoter. And it was episode 30, I think. So super early. And I just overprepared and sort of thought myself into this awful, like washing machine cyclone of overthinking. And it really wasn't, it wasn't my best performance. And I was really disappointed because I loved Robert. And I wanted to put on a good show for him. And I'm sure if you go back and listen to it,
Starting point is 00:07:16 you probably can't even notice, but I know how good I could have been. And that was exclusively due to worry. I was worried that I wasn't going to be good enough. And I turned up on the episode and underperformed And that was exclusively due to worry. I was worried that I wasn't going to be good enough. And I turned up on the episode and underperformed and then castigated myself for worrying so much that I'd caused myself to underperform. And this is how, you know, bad spirals of performance, the yips or, I don't
Starting point is 00:07:39 know what you call it in America. Basically when someone, a sportsman is having a bad run of form and they can't get themselves out of it, that is this, that is worry begetting more worry leading to poorer performance. I don't think that worrying helps. And I messed up in front of Robert Green. Kevin Artois, my insecurity of being inferior and incompetent is my greatest source of fuel.
Starting point is 00:08:01 Is this toxic? That is a very good question. And I think that it is very powerful at giving you activation energy to get started at doing something. And I think that that should not be overlooked or undervalued. I think that there is great benefit to be had. If you are stuck in region beta, some comfortably numb, floating through life existence, and you need a matchstick lighting underneath your asshole
Starting point is 00:08:36 so that you actually go out and do something, this fear of being inferior and incompetent, this insecurity that you have, using that as fuel, just use what you have. If you've got resentment and bitterness and shame, use it. Because that, it is so hard going from zero to one, so difficult, but once you've started moving, you can use other sources of fuel.
Starting point is 00:09:00 It's kind of like when you think about a booster rocket taking off and they have multiple ejectable fuel sources as they go and they use different fuel sources at different stages as they go up through the launch sequence. I think it's kind of like that. Where it does get toxic is when you use it for a long time. And the reason for that, in my opinion, is that it makes you very easy to manipulate, very predictable. It makes you over index on the opinions of other people, on the way that your performance has shown up in comparison with others as opposed to it being yourself.
Starting point is 00:09:39 It's a very externalised locus of control, seeking a lot of validation from the world as opposed to from how you've performed yourself. And the reason it makes you fragile, makes you fragile and the easy to manipulate and easy to predict thing is just that everybody is always going to know this isn't, you don't need an enemy who's like trying to snipe you with your particular weakness for this to be a problem, but you are always going to encounter the same problems and that often going to come from overly relying on the opinions of other people, from trying to compete where you don't necessarily need to, from never patting yourself on the back or
Starting point is 00:10:18 feeling like you've done a good job because you've got this insecurity of incompetence, which means you're always looking for the incompetence, not the competence. And I'm saying this as someone who, you know, a big insecurity of being inferior and incompetent, that's played a role in my life. So use it in the beginning, but realize that it is not there to stay. It had a role. The same as the chip on your shoulder from the kids that bullied you in school or whatever it is.
Starting point is 00:10:44 It's useful to get you started, but it's don't keep using it long term. The same as the chip on your shoulder from the kids that bullied you in school or whatever it is. It's useful to get you started, but don't keep using it long term. That would be my advice. Colby Thicknessy8828. Will you do an honorary shoey on stage in Australia for the people? Look, I am a visitor to your great nation, which we used to own, and I will appropriate your culture as required. Who am I to say no to the Australian people in their favorite pursuit? For the people that don't know, I'm doing a live show. I'm doing a series of live shows, a live tour in Australia.
Starting point is 00:11:18 You can check out the dates and the shows. I'm going to Brisbane and Melbourne and Sydney. You can get tickets for that at chriswilliamson.live slash Australia, and I will do a Shoei. I would quite like to do one of Newtonic because the new America flavors are amazing, but it's gonna be 10 p.m. at night when I finish the show, or 11 p.m., so maybe not.
Starting point is 00:11:42 DCX1, please quickly revisit some techniques for coming out of monk mode. After power housing work for a year, it's time to reintegrate back into society. Any tips? Great question. So I did a big chunk about monk mode a few Q and A's ago. And for the people, for quick recap,
Starting point is 00:12:03 monk mode is a focus period of isolation, introspection and improvement. Often a lot of going to the gym, reading, mindfulness, maybe some therapy and it's just you really dialing in just on yourself without distractions of a social calendar, without having to adhere to expectations of other people all that much. And one of the problems with monk mode is that it allows people who are a little bit more introverted by nature to feel noble in their isolation.
Starting point is 00:12:37 And this can be very tempting because it has turned what previously you may have seen as something that you're a little bit ashamed of or something that you needed to work on, your desire to not go out and see people or spend so much time outside of the house with others into a personal development strategy. And this can create a feedback loop where after a while, monk mode becomes so addicting, it's hard to get out of it.
Starting point is 00:12:59 The purpose of monk mode is to do a focus period, isolation, introspection, and improvement, so that you then become a functional, more functional, more competent member of society. Not so that you just do monk mode to be better at monk mode and reintegrating is difficult. So tips to reintegrate back in. And this would be the same. I mean, we could have done this after COVID, but I would say first off, go to places where there are the purpose of the event or the pursuit has a social dynamic baked into it.
Starting point is 00:13:30 So I'm thinking CrossFit class, improv, salsa dancing, pickleball, any group type activity, ideally co-ed, because you're going to need to speak to both men and women. And if you do it in a low stakes environment where you're going to need to speak to both men and women. And if you do it in a low stakes environment, where you're not asking for their number, they just need you to kick the ball in their direction or whatever it is that you're doing. That's good. And I think it helps to kind of create a frame and a vessel within which you can do your, oh, I am, hello, nice to meet you. My name is DCX1. I would like to be friend.
Starting point is 00:14:10 You know, it's just way easier. It's less of a big deal. Second thing, I would, when you start to move into one-on-ones with people, spending time with friends, going out on dates, I would purposefully start with people that make it feel as easy as possible to be yourself around them. I think about reintegrating socially
Starting point is 00:14:30 as kind of like having a perfect garden of snow. Some snow's fallen overnight and you come out in the morning and there's no track marks in it at all. You almost have a very pure, unmolested environment for you to begin your social, your new social habits. So maybe some of the more suboptimal social habits that you had before, you'll have been able to get rid of a little bit and you can kind of start afresh.
Starting point is 00:14:58 It's like shaking the Etch A Sketch because some of the habits have dropped away because you simply haven't been that social. So the problem is if you begin to spend time around people who don't feel comfortable being yourself around, the issue with that is that those may become your new habits and I think that habit setting is greatest in the beginning. So I think you want to find time around who are the people that I want to be like?
Starting point is 00:15:20 People that are honest and truthful and comfortable in their own skin, they've got a mission, they know where they're going. They're having fun while they're going there. They're thought, you know, those are the things be around the people that you want to be like, and that you can be yourself around too, which is a nice balance. And I think that's it. Groups group activities where socializing is built in.
Starting point is 00:15:39 And then when you move on to one-on-ones be with people where silence and being yourself feels comfortable, I think that'll help. MJBellang3r. How would you describe your most challenging chapter? How was it an inflection point for growth? Oh, so I had one that I sort of often talk about, which was the end of my twenties. I've often talked about which was the end of my twenties. I've had tons. I'm very, very good at making a big deal out of everything for myself. The last 18 months has probably been
Starting point is 00:16:14 close to it. It's definitely going to rank in my top three. And that's been because of a lot of increase in attention and opportunity and offers and a change in the way that, you know, the world sees me in some ways, which is so fucking wanky to say, like how up your ass do you need to be to say that? But people treat, seem to treat me a little bit differently than they used to. And that's been, that coupled with a ton of attention and offers and it's all very flattering and charming and all the rest of it. It's just been, it's been difficult. And that layered on top with the show 10xing in two years, which is what it did, well, is continuing to do, has just resulted in an awful lot of work and operational fuck and, uh, operational fuckery. I don't really talk about this all that much because I feel like showing how
Starting point is 00:17:12 the sausage gets made is kind of uncool. Um, so, but behind the scenes, lots and lots of changes and team growth. And, you know, I moved out to Austin and had a Mormon assistant in the UK and Dean. And now there's all of these people and there's deals and there's a new tonic, there's an energy drink and there's also all this other stuff going on and have to spin these plates, live shows, book deal partners, big episode, Brett Cooper's coming through, Jordan Peterson in town. It's been a lot.
Starting point is 00:17:41 Uh, and it's been an inflection point for growth because it's really shown me that during the period of time where I've achieved the greatest success that I've ever had, there's been things that I've been missing and it's reminded me, I think it's resented me on what it is that I want, which is not just success and growth at any cost. It's to enjoy the process. And this is why I'm kind of in this, like, super cook mode, fucking, Wilbarian maxing thing, where I'm trying to find a way to transcend and include my desire to do well, and also enjoy the process.
Starting point is 00:18:19 So that's why I'm talking about that a lot at the moment, because it's sort of personal to me. So, yeah, leaving club promo, and then the last 18 months or so of the show. Moray. Are you gay? I think that Ben has put these together in a particular order. No, I'm not, unless it is for Mike Isretel.
Starting point is 00:18:42 He's the only man that I will be gay for. The only Jew I know that has a foreskin. Imagine that. He's like a shiny Charizard. He's like the rarest of them all. Divvyboy, where do you record? Why do you record your podcasts while standing? Don't you get tired in the long ones?
Starting point is 00:18:59 Not really. For the people that don't know, all of my virtual studios for probably four years now have been at a standing desk. I don't feel that much more tired. I actually feel more focused. I'm sat in this seat at the moment, which I've stolen from the conference room down the hall.
Starting point is 00:19:19 I don't like it. I don't like sitting down. I'm always shifting around. I'm a bit of a fidgety person when I'm trying to think. I often like twirl a pen in my hands. You'll have seen this on the episodes of Pouch Six. I'll be twirling a pen between my fingers. I don't get tired.
Starting point is 00:19:35 I think if you have tried to do content creation and struggled because of focus or just feeling a little bit inside, up in your own head, by standing desk, pivot to that made a massive difference to me because any of the sort of additional discomfort that I needed to blow off or any of the energy that I needed to get rid of, super easy. When you're standing up, super easy. Luke JN18, do you think a buzz cut is a sign of confidence? Yeah, in some ways, definitely is on a woman.
Starting point is 00:20:14 It's a sign of confidence in your hairline, because there's no hiding it. If this sucker's moving back, there is absolutely no hiding it. I'm getting to the age now, 36, where some of my friends are really starting to go thin on top. Not, you know, oh, that's a little bit wispier than it was last year, but real receding thing. Like, that's going to have to come off within five years,
Starting point is 00:20:35 or you're going to look really, really silly. So yeah, I do think it's a sign of confidence. I'm very pro buzz cut. I went through every hairstyle in history. I had a huge afro for all my club promoting career. And then 24, 25 got rid of it. And I had sort of curly hair on top until COVID. Go back, look at the first episodes.
Starting point is 00:20:56 I've got tons of hair and very pro buzz cut. Kevin Dice, congratulations. Thank you. Now that you've become firmly lumped into the Manosphere category, are you anticipating a coordinated attack on your show slash self by the same mainstream media types who tried to cut down Andrew Huberman? Yeah, I think it's in the post. It's in the post for everybody.
Starting point is 00:21:17 It doesn't matter who you are, whether you're Rogan or Jay Shetty or True Geordie or Andrew Huberman or, you know, Andrew Schultz, like everybody's got it coming. And the way that I see it more and more now is that mainstream media is struggling for clicks. Independent media is swimming in clicks. One of the ways that mainstream media can claw some of that back is by making their content about our content or about us. and claw some of that back is by making their content about our content or about us.
Starting point is 00:21:44 So it is a wonderful way for people who are in a dying, boring, lame industry to try and capture some more attention. So yeah, you know, I'm not looking forward to it. I don't have a PR crisis team. If you do PR in crisis and you want to just be my ejector seat button, in case I need to call you, then feel free to reach out, but, uh, it'll happen.
Starting point is 00:22:09 It'll happen at some point. And I guess I'll see what I'm made of when it does. And I've got Andrew Cuban's number so I can just ring him and ask him what he did. Uh, D E V E N Devon, are you and Mike Isretel related? You all look alike. LMAO. What do you mean you all? Me and Mike?
Starting point is 00:22:33 Or are you lumping us in with some broader group of people? Uh, we both have foreskins. Very, which, so, there's one thing that we have in common. Beyond that, I don't think that you could have found two more dissimilar looking people if you'd tried. Mike has a uniquely shaped head, which I love. But you need to have a very serious mental health condition to think that we look even remotely similar.
Starting point is 00:23:13 Unless this is a, your white boys all look the same thing, in which case, yeah, we do. Andrea Todd 5295. Question. This is probably a really stupid question. I live in the UK, Manchester, and whenever I come across a Brit who has moved to America, my first thought is how does their wildlife affect your mental state and wellbeing? I would always be paranoid about snakes and spiders or being followed home by an alligator. So my question is, do you ever think about it when you're putting on shoes or walking past a lake?
Starting point is 00:23:46 That is the most charming question that I think I've ever had. That is so lovely. No, I haven't thought that. I guess Texas has got some snakes, but you know, if you're living in a suburban area, what you really should be worried about is if you go to somewhere like a Tennessee and you're in the smoky mountains and you're in the suburbs and there's bears, black bears will come through and stuff. But no, I haven't. I'm blown away by just how like charming that that question was.
Starting point is 00:24:21 No, I haven't. Maybe I should. What if I get followed home by an alligator? My God. But no, I, that's not something that I've been worried about. To only Lee, to only Lee. How long did it take you before you started earning money from your online business?
Starting point is 00:24:38 I guess you mean the podcast, because Newtonic is just a big laundry machine where money goes in and cans come out, but just more cans come out, no money ever comes out of it. So gonna guess you mean the show. It was year four, the start of year four. We're going six and a half years and the first three years we made no money at all.
Starting point is 00:25:03 So, I mean, we generated revenue, but it was less than the costs that we had. So we were net negative. I think typically the way that it seems is that most podcasts around about episode 150, start making money. And you can get through three a week in a year, or you can get through one a week in three years. But unless you have an existing big platform or you're super talented in the beginning, which I certainly wasn't, it's gonna take a little while. So yeah, it may look all glamorous from the outside, but this was a long slog of absolutely nothing happening
Starting point is 00:25:42 for a very long time, especially from a money perspective. Cha Cha Boom 5. Have your looks ever gotten in the way of anything you wanted to do in life, or has it all been beneficial? Have you ever used your looks to benefit yourself in a knowingly unscrupulous manner? Well, it's a very difficult question to answer, because no one wants to hear a moderately all right-looking person talk about the downsides of being moderately all right-looking. And also, I've been thinking about this recently,
Starting point is 00:26:15 I feel an unbelievably bad niche. I'm nowhere near smart enough to be a smart person's smart person. And I'm not good-looking enough to be a smart person's smart person. And I'm not good looking enough to be a good looking person's good looking person. So I'm like the smart person's handsome guy or the good looking person's smart dude. Um, which I think might be the worst position to be in, but there are assumptions and ideas that people have about what you've got to add and your worth and all the rest of it. I would be lying if I said that the way that I look hasn't been a benefit to me. You know, I can fucking flutter my eyelashes and some server will be fine at giving us a table or trying to turn on the charm.
Starting point is 00:27:05 Unfortunately, the guy wasn't gay today. Uh, maybe if it was Mike Isretel, it would have been fine. Uh, tried to turn on the charm, but I managed to just like. Sneak this table out. Um, it gets in the way. It does get in the way sometimes, but the benefits far exceed the challenges. And you know, this is the rich guy talking about how painful it is to manage his money.
Starting point is 00:27:27 I can't really say that. Have you ever used my lucks to benefit myself in a knowingly unscrupulous manner? So this is me being in this sort of perfect Goldilocks zone of handsome enough to not get the benefit of being ugly, but nowhere near handsome enough to actually be able to achieve anything like that drastic. ugly, but nowhere near handsome enough to actually be able to achieve anything like that drastic. I think the most I ever got paid to do modeling was like five grand for a shoot, which is piddling numbers compared with most other models. And my average day rate I think was about 200 pounds or 250 quid. That five grand thing was a one-off and it was the only time I ever did it. No, I try and get into the front of queues with things.
Starting point is 00:28:11 I, you know, put a little smize on and like this disgusting. I'd probably feel sick if I saw myself doing this, like trying to get the air hostess to like give me an extra set of biscuits or something like that. Like you're flirting with someone's grandmother, grow up. But it works and here I am, one Lotus Biscoff better off because of my lucks. That's it. Matt Sadsinski, how did you know you were providing valuable content
Starting point is 00:28:41 to your viewers when starting out? Because it was valuable to me. And I have always been the target audience for this show. It's never been for anybody else. It's always just been for me. And when I start to forget that, when I do forget that, when I get distracted, when I start to think about what you guys want, I don't know who you are.
Starting point is 00:29:06 I've met an increasing number of you at the live shows and I've heard from tens of thousands of you over email and DM and stuff, but I can only ever do the show for me and if I find it valuable myself, I can be confident in knowing that there is some good majority of people that will also find it valuable too. So it's just been, if it's valuable to me, it'll probably be valuable to someone else as well. Jacarious100, hours or casually dressed? This is a good question.
Starting point is 00:29:41 I'm a big fan of Funeral for a Friend. They were one of the first bands I ever got to see live. I think they might be from Middlesbrough, which is where I'm from. Uh, casually dressed and deep in conversation, uh, is a phenomenal album. God, 2003? Maybe earlier, maybe earlier, maybe 2003, 2004. Fantastic. That, but ours is also great.
Starting point is 00:30:04 Uh, drag, fantastic. That, but ours is also great. Uh, drag feet loving the new vlogs. Thank you. What's your plan with those going forward? Don't have a plan. Quite bad at having a plan. Um, don't have a plan. Just keep doing them. Uh, I do not feel comfortable doing vlogs,
Starting point is 00:30:26 certainly not the face to camera style thing. I'm much more comfortable with a structured conversation about a topic as opposed to free flowing. And I think a big part of it is fear that I'm not that interesting when I'm not adding, purposefully trying to add value through coming up with ideas or making dick jokes or something. So, but you guys seem to love it, which is really lovely actually. And the comments on the vlogs are very, very heartfelt and I like it. So
Starting point is 00:31:01 just keep doing them. Max, the dude that we got that is doing the filmmaking for it is just so great. I've wanted to work with him from before the time that I moved to Austin. I feel so grateful that I managed to get the guy that I wanted. I love his shooting style. It's so simple and stripped back, but it's still beautiful.
Starting point is 00:31:18 So just keep doing it. Keep doing the same, definitely more training series. We'll be doing something with Sebum. We'll be doing something with George Heaton. We'll be doing something with Sebum. We'll be doing something with George Heaton. We'll be doing something with Hormozi. We'll be doing maybe something with Huberman. Kind of tempted to just do them all in the gym because that makes it easier,
Starting point is 00:31:35 but then that's also not that varied. So I'm open to ideas. You got ideas? Let me know what you want to see. 56TTT. You said you're creating a product with Mike Isretel. Can you tell us any more? Love the episodes you do together. Thank you. Oh, I want to tell you so bad. But's beyond world changing what we're trying to do.
Starting point is 00:32:11 And it may fall flat on its face and it may be a colossal waste of time and money and effort, but it's a big swing for the fences. And it's just going to be so cool. So I can't wait. I cannot wait to release this. Mike, how can I say this without fucking giving away what it is? Mike rang me after the weekend where he had used the thing that we are developing and could not shut up talking about how amazing
Starting point is 00:32:38 it is. And he is not an easy man to impress. Ask his wife. Mama777, sometimes your titles verge on being more click-baity than I'd like. I know there's way worse culprits than you, but I hope you consider rectifying this as the show grows more. I appreciate the input. It's something that we work hard on all the time to find this balance.
Starting point is 00:33:06 I agree. I think that there are way, way worse culprits. You know, there are many, many, many circles of hell of, of clickbait that you can go through. But when the rest of the market moves in that direction, it is very hard to fight for clicks and eyeballs if you remain more standoffish. But one of the things, and the strategists, the guys Chase and Luke and Jodie, the guys that do strategy and copywriting for me, they, if I let them loose and said, oh, you've got free rein, you can do whatever you want. Everything would look so much different.
Starting point is 00:33:42 And often they have to sacrifice performance because I'm saying, sorry, I don't feel happy with that wording. It feels too outrageous and click-baity. So yeah, we're just, I am making a purposeful effort to be more positive in the titles. You know, a lot of the conversations are easy to frame as the problem with modern feminism, why does no one trust the media anymore, you know, but lot of the conversations are easy to frame as the problem with modern feminism. Why does no one trust the media anymore? You know, but they're just so negative.
Starting point is 00:34:09 And even if they describe the episode correctly, the episode often has a positive skew on it. So we're really working hard to try and come up with a way to drive clicks, be positive, and also sort of maintain that level of intellectual respect, I think, for you guys. My point being, if you just fucking clicked on the videos more, I wouldn't need to do anything fancy with the thumbnails of the titles. So really your fault. But I appreciate the question and I think that you are right.
Starting point is 00:34:43 And it is also something that we are working on. Andrea Mew. When you put your shoes and socks on, do you put both socks on first followed by both shoes, or do you put one sock on, then one shoe, then the next sock, and then the next shoe? I don't know anybody that does the second thing and I'm pretty sure that's like an early signing of having a stroke or being a war criminal or something if you do that other
Starting point is 00:35:18 one. It's got to be who the fuck puts one sock on and then one shoe and then the next sock. So you've got one shoe and sock on with a bare foot on the other side. No, thank you. Moving on. Tim D. Simons. Hi Chris. You've spoken recently about going through a tough time. How are you doing? Thank you. Yes. I haven't spoken about this yet. We'll release a vlog actually, maybe an accompanying podcast about it. Some health bits that I've been grappling with. I was a hot mess, like a real hot mess at the start of this year. And I'll explain more when I did that bit properly, but, uh, I'm getting
Starting point is 00:36:02 better, which is nice and, uh, it's wild to have capacity taken away from you, uh, through, you know, no choice of your own. It's very, very brutal. Uh, and if you're someone that relies a lot on your mind to get you out of difficult situations, and then the very thing you have, your mental capacity is one of the things that kind of gets hit. It's this ruthless, it feels so unfair and so vicious.
Starting point is 00:36:31 But I'm all right. I'm good. This traveling around has just been so great. I've been with George now for, you know, basically two months. He was in Austin for a month and we've been traveling around for what will become a month, uh, at the end of next week. And we went to Lake Norman drove through Gatlinburg and then did the 4th of July in Nashville, then we flew to New Orleans and now we're in Bozeman and we're seeing
Starting point is 00:36:53 ludicrous at the county fair. Fucking Luda. Uh, we're seeing him at the county fair. So it's, this has just been exactly what I needed. So I'm glad that I'm able to step in and adjust life like this. And I'm very fortunate to be able to do this. So yeah, getting that. I'll be good.
Starting point is 00:37:11 End of this year, I'll be good. Valon K, where is that shoulder bag from that you wear in the recent vlog? That would be, it's over there. It's an Onnit bag, I think. It's an Onnit bag, I think. It's an Onnit bum bag, like you call it, fanny pack in America. And Sky, my ad sky gave it to me.
Starting point is 00:37:34 They don't make them anymore, I'm sorry. But, Nomadic make a travel sling, which is really awesome. It's in black, green and blue. I've got it in all three colors. That's great. It doesn't fit in everyday carry-in though,
Starting point is 00:37:52 but that fits a handgun in. Nomatics, I don't think does, but it will fit a Kindle Oasis in just so. It's a good replacement. Become your own best friend. How do you keep track of all the quotes you share? You're able to access them easily. It is all Apple Notes.
Starting point is 00:38:11 Me and George and Yousef and a bunch of other friends searched and searched for yours, trying to work out what is the solution. Is it Evernote? Is it Notion? Is it Ulysses? Is it trying to find the holy grail of note-taking apps? And it was staring us in the face the whole time. I'm looking now, I've got 3,103 notes that I've accumulated. All in here.
Starting point is 00:38:41 And the reason I'm able to access them easily is just because of global search. all in here. And the reason I'm able to access them easily is just because of global search. So they're not particularly well chunked into folders. They're not that well formatted, but I can usually pick one word that I need out of a quote or out of a note or out of an episode,
Starting point is 00:38:58 a set of notes that I've done previously or whatever it is. And that one word will usually just bring it up. They need a slightly more powerful global search now, especially when you're getting into the 3000s for notes, but that's it. Chris Carmen five, what t-shirts do you wear? They look crisp, clean and simple. Thanks in advance.
Starting point is 00:39:17 Thank you for the compliment on my t-shirt. So this is I think what you're gonna be talking about. And this is a Zara, fuck, I'll just load it up. Give me a second. Zara men's basic, basic t-shirt. Fucking true classics trying to ping Zara by jumping on. Okay, so it's not the boxy fit t-shirt. Basic slim fit t-shirt. Zara.
Starting point is 00:39:49 Make sure. Yeah. Zara basic slim fit t-shirt. And I wear an XL. I think I wear an XL. And it comes in a ton of colors. It's great. It's what I've worn for a very long time. Highly, highly recommended. I can't give you a basic Slim Fit t-shirt. It's $19 and they last forever. So go and get a thousand. And Zara, sponsor me. Elise Jean Nice,
Starting point is 00:40:23 are you going to do butt stuff on Thursday with me? This is one of the girls from Barry's bootcamp in Austin. That message has come from Instagram, so if you want to go and check out what she looks like, gentlemen, do your worst. Uh, I do ass and abs on a Thursday, uh, consistently, and that's why are you going to do butt stuff on Thursday with me, ass and abs on a Thursday consistently. And that's why are you going to do butt stuff on Thursday with me was a question.
Starting point is 00:40:50 I do hope that you know what you've just done to your Instagram though, the fact that you ask that question and put your handle out there. So Godspeed, my lady. Chris Lepoidovian, hi Chris, do you get a sense of pride when an interviewee says that's a great question or I hadn't thought about it in that way before? I think part of the reason your podcast has seen so much growth is your ability to communicate so well.
Starting point is 00:41:16 Awesome work doing the thing. Thank you. Yeah, I'd be lying if I said there wasn't a big flood of dopamine when someone that you respect complements you on the thing that you do. You know, I'm, I made a career out of being the most stupid person in the room of every conversation. They are an expert and I am an avatar for a curious person. So if I come up with something which is genuinely novel or interesting to them, that's cool. One way that that can be a little bit more
Starting point is 00:41:50 dangerous is that you can actually start chasing that and you can just, as opposed to being nice and succinct, you can always try and wow the guests with some cool story or whatever and a lot of the time that gets in the way. Like they're the talent. I'm not the talent for most of the episodes. Today, I'm the talent. Fuck yeah. Chris Williamson show. But most of the time I'm not the talent.
Starting point is 00:42:12 They are, right? And my goal has always been find a person that I think has something interesting to say and get the best insights out of them by creating this environment, this Petri dish that they can live in, which is easy and comfortable and safe and flowing and enjoyable and all of the things that you need to just set them up. So, but yeah, I like it. It's nice. Ignacio Guarino. Absolutely fumbling the bag on names today.
Starting point is 00:42:50 Congrats. How does the medium alter the conversation you would otherwise have with the guest without the mics or camera on? Do you always feel present in the conversation or does it sometimes become a struggle? Do you ever crave raw conversation with the guest without the mics?
Starting point is 00:43:04 Awesome insight. Yes, correct. Unfortunately, the really, really big episodes that we did, especially the video wall stuff, that helped because, unfortunately, that helped because it was immersive. And as we move from conversation to conversation, you actually felt like you'd changed. Some of the big shoots that I do can feel daunting
Starting point is 00:43:27 and take me out of the moment a little bit. I'm looking here, I'm always on the left. So I can always see panning out to my right, just fucking 20 people. I don't know what any of them do except for my guys. And they're noting things down or changing cards or checking on lighting levels and stuff. And it is a bit, you know, it's not the most intimate,
Starting point is 00:43:51 but first off I've been getting better at that. Secondly, when framed correctly, that can make it feel like more of an occasion. So you're like, oh, I got to get my game face on. Stop messing about. This is, I really need to my game face on, stop messing about this is, I really need to lock in, which is good. And yeah, I, I'm fortunate enough to be able to message most of the guys if I need to have a raw conversation without the mics on.
Starting point is 00:44:20 And I think the goal is to get the conversation in front of the mic to the level of ease that it would be without. And continuing to chase that is a... And almost limiting the amount of conversations that you have outside of that. For instance, I think Hueman's going to come back on within the next month or so. I don't want to have a conversation with him
Starting point is 00:44:43 for that long before we get started, because sometimes you sort of blow your load on interesting shit that you've both seen. month or so, I don't want to have a conversation with him for that long before we get started, because sometimes you sort of blow your load on interesting shit that you've both seen. I know that the My First Million pod, Sean and Sam, their producer doesn't let them speak when they get on the call. So he's in control of muting the mics and he mutes both of the mics so that they can't do exactly that and front run any of the things that they wanna talk about. So yes, sometimes it feels a little bit, how would you say?
Starting point is 00:45:12 You know that you're having a conversation that's being recorded. That being said, I have enough conversations over dinner to last me a lifetime about interesting stuff that's raw and would totally get everybody canceled. So hooray. Quincy O'Beng, how do you distinguish between necessary and unnecessary worries in your daily life?
Starting point is 00:45:34 Kind of going back to the first question here that I don't know necessary worries. I think it's just because of where I'm at at the moment. I just, I really don't like the idea. I'm going to give myself a little bit more light. I really don't like the idea of necessary worries. I don't know what that means. What would a necessary worry be? It's an interesting question. Maybe it's because as a perennial worrying necessitia,
Starting point is 00:46:13 I crave to be able to relinquish that. And for me, any opportunity to dial that back sounds very attractive. I would say if you are the sort of person that asks that question, how do you distinguish between necessary and unnecessary worries in your daily life? Treating, even if this isn't true factually, it's true functionally, treating all of your worries as unnecessary is probably a good place to start.
Starting point is 00:46:44 And then just try and let go of as much as you can from that. Cole Cambrough, what are you regularly saying no to that lets you say yes to the most important things? Well, this is kind of that toughest period thing and also the lady in the red dress idea that whole Moses got that basically, as you become more successful, the things that you need to say no to are things that 18 months ago you would have begged to have had the opportunity to say yes to, which is hard, especially if you're a people pleaser, especially if you've got a bit of imposter syndrome. So I'm regularly saying no to calls that don't have a defined outcome in them,
Starting point is 00:47:27 exploratory stuff in the beginning, partnerships with people who I can't see how this is going to work in the immediate term within the next six months. Also, not doing any guesting. Haven't done... Am I right in saying the only show I've done this year is Rogan's. And I think I maybe did five the year before. So I'm, I'm saying no to a lot of that because there is just so much on my plate. It's disgusting.
Starting point is 00:47:55 And, uh, woe is me, busy fucking busy guy, but, uh, this is what awaits you. If you want to achieve any amount of micro niche influence of fame? What awaits you is a fuck ton of emails and slack messages. So get ready for that. I need some more water. Wait there. We're back in the room. Luke T Betts.
Starting point is 00:48:17 When are we sniffing vapes next? Fantastic. Luke is my tour manager. Also my book agent. Also in on Newtonic and The Thing with Mike. Uh, whenever you want, mate, probably after the final show in Australia, we can go and sniff vapes. Lexi Joe 09, from what you know slash hear, do men want to be
Starting point is 00:48:39 approached by women at the gym? Lexi, let me try and explain a man's psychology to you for a moment. Let me man's explain a man's psychology. Yes, always, without question, by any woman with a pulse. Permanently, yes, or yes, woman with a pulse permanently. Yes.
Starting point is 00:49:10 All yes, every man wants to be approached by a woman at the gym. Guys that are in relationships, guys that have got gluten intolerance, guys that can't bench properly, all of them would love a little bit of female attention in the gym. Heidi has surrendered. What degree did you do at university? I did two degrees. I did a master's in international marketing and a bachelor's in business management, and I can't remember either of them. And I was always reticent about doing a set of degrees that I didn't think really fulfilled me all that much. I wasn't, I fell out of love with academia within six months of being at
Starting point is 00:49:51 university. I was totally disenchanted with it, but just knew that I was good at handing things in just about on time with a passable, I could play the game of academia. I knew what the mark, the markers, what the fucking called assessors, teachers, lecturers, tutors, uh, what they wanted. And I was able to submit things that got me, uh, good grades, but I didn't learn anything and I always regretted the fact that I didn't do psychology or philosophy or something that I would have loved more. And then I started the podcast and now there's 800 and whatever modules of
Starting point is 00:50:26 some of the best lecturers on the planet. So I didn't need to. L lyric, Everly, Lyris Verley, present status of your aspiring trophy husband goals, uh, uh, aspiring, I guess, a husband in trophy husband in training or whatever. I'm not even in training. I mean, Bozeman in present status is in Bozeman. Nicola Shoie. When did it occur to you that you were good at asking questions?
Starting point is 00:51:02 Uh, I don't... No, actually. I guess, probably year three of doing the show. I was often told as a kid that I was kind of... Gobby, loud-mouthed, teacher could always pick out my voice from the fucking back of the room. It annoyed me so much. These like really naughty kids, like actually naughty kids,
Starting point is 00:51:26 but their voice didn't carry as far as mine and mine did. So I would always be the one that got shouted at, which was really irritating to me. And I think I internalized the lesson about being talking too much and not being sufficiently thoughtful in conversation, maybe because of that. So getting to start to do the show and focusing on questions, really, really focusing on questions was just such a great training ground for me. And it was a really big confidence builder that picked up rapidly, super rapidly.
Starting point is 00:52:13 So I'm very glad for it, but it took a while. I didn't step into this. I thought it was terrible at asking questions. I knew it was curious, but I didn't think conversationally that I was good at doing it. Madhu Mohan Reddy, how to get a well-defined and chiseled face? What's your routine? I don't know what a face routine would look like when it comes to the defined and chiseled
Starting point is 00:52:38 thing. My skin routine is essentially non-existent and my face routine is actually non-existent, and my face routine is actually non-existent. So I think it's just genetics and body fat. And I think if you want a more chiseled face, lose body fat. And if you get down to single digits and you still don't have a chiseled face, blame your parents. MHHM5CV, potential partner? Question mark.
Starting point is 00:53:07 What's the holdup? Uh, give me a break, mate. I just got out of a relationship. Um, well, I mean, the holdup is that the breakup is the holdup. The breakup was the holdup. I, I don't know how to answer that. Like I should just be immediately finding chicks everywhere on the market.
Starting point is 00:53:32 Maybe I'll find one in Bozeman. Maybe there's a lovely farm girl waiting for me here in Bozeman. Andrew Birrachad9555, Hey Chris, congrats. Thank you. Here's my question. I personally feel I am unable to celebrate my wins in life. As soon as I accomplish a goal, after toiling on it for a while, my brain automatically jumps to the next problem to solve or the next goal.
Starting point is 00:53:59 I know the key to all this is to reward myself in some shape or form, yet I cannot find anything that feels like a good enough recompense. Anything I gift myself for my hard work seems minuscule and extremely short-lived when compared to the effort I put in to achieve victory. So much so that the positive feelings I get out of it are almost negligible and I might as well have not rewarded myself at all. Is there an antidote to that? How do you reward yourself for the accomplishments in a way that re How do you reward yourself for the accomplishments in a way that recharges you for the next tasks ahead? First off, I need to compliment you on that question, because that is a phenomenal question
Starting point is 00:54:33 and I think it sees the challenge that many people who demand a lot of themselves. Sorry, I've been on a flight all day, so if you're an hour in and thinking, why does Chris sound like he's been deep throating a guy with glass for a dick? Gay again, it was Mike Isretel had a foreskin. It's because I've been on a flight all day and I had five hours sleep. So here we are. And I had a Starbucks egg sausage BAP thing and and one Lotus bisque off, or I flooded my eyelashes at the hostess. So, very good question. How do you reward yourself for your accomplishments
Starting point is 00:55:15 in a way that recharges you for the next tasks ahead? How do you not look over the shoulder of the present moment to forget the thing that you've just achieved, despite the fact that what you were working toward was the achievement for a very long time and continue to sort of demand so much of yourself that you don't ever actually get to enjoy the accomplishments. This is a big problem for many high performers. Most. I don't know many people who perform well in life
Starting point is 00:55:49 that don't have this challenge. I can give you all of the pithy, hard things are hard, that's why they're hard, Alex Hormozi quotes or shit that I've come up with. But trying to get a bit more tactical because I think that would be more useful. Celebrating wins with other people seems to break this pattern quite well.
Starting point is 00:56:14 So one of the things that we're trying to do with the show is we hit different milestones, one million, two million, et cetera, is to go on little trips, to have a call with Dean, to do something that instantiates the occasion. And I think doing it with other people, also telling other people as well, telling the people around you in your life, this is something I want to work on. I want to be more grateful and sink into my victories as much as I can.
Starting point is 00:56:46 Will you help me? I mean, what a great gift to give your friends to say, I'll, I'll like give you the money or I'll come up with the thing, like just tag along, tag along and tell me, well done. I think that it sounds contrived. It sounds like, oh, but you've planned it and you know, you're telling your friends to come along and you know, do they really want to be there as you congratulate yourself? Yeah, they do. Your friends do want to be there at each different one of your wins in life. And if they don't, they're not your friends and they can go fuck themselves.
Starting point is 00:57:18 Good friends will always be there to say, dude, so fucking happy for you with that job raise, that career change, that new house, that whatever it is that you're doing, body fat percentage you've got to, uh, they'll be there. So using experiences and celebrating wins, especially with other people seems to go very well. Rewarding yourself in a way that recharges you for the tasks ahead is a little bit more difficult because you're going to have built up this habit over time, this sort of fervent energy that you have used to get yourself to the stage where you've actually accomplished
Starting point is 00:58:04 things. And then you need to somehow say, you know that thing that you were just doing obsessively, turn that off because now it's like, I pat yourself on the back time. That's not the way it works, at least not in my experience. What I've done myself, this is part of what I'm doing. You just had this crazy tear on the show.
Starting point is 00:58:26 We did one cinema episode every single Monday for seven and a half months. And we were supposed to do, we were intending on doing six a year. And we did like 28 in seven months. So even more, we did two a week during Christmas, I think for a couple of weeks. So this for me is very much what you're talking about.
Starting point is 00:58:50 So I got a friend who loves to celebrate things, George, and we decided to put a trip together. And I'm still working and doing stuff, but I'm going to go back. I already am feeling recharged. So doing it in little ways with other people, not on your own experiences, rather than possessions, positive reinforcement and celebration. Those are the things that have worked for me. And dude, I feel you. I think many people in the audience really, really get to the challenge that you're facing.
Starting point is 00:59:34 But to get pithy for a second, a tiny bit of a mindset shift might be a smart idea too. Why are you doing all of these things and accomplishing anything if it isn't for you to be able to enjoy them? I mean, the gold standard is for you to enjoy the process and the accomplishment, but if you kill yourself during the process and the accomplishment is so short-lived that you're already onto the process of the next thing immediately, you will reach a point where you ask yourself, what am I doing here? And trying to front run that as much as possible. You are here to enjoy the things that you do, especially if you're achieving things.
Starting point is 01:00:18 It sounds like you're absolutely crushing it and whatever it is that you do, God, fuck, you have to give yourself some credit. You have to be able to find a way to enjoy this. So asking yourself a question, what would this be like if it was more enjoyable? Just what would, just ask yourself that question and see what comes up. What would the pursuit and the accomplishment be like if it was a little bit more enjoyable? Because for me, I would be traveling around America with a friend. I would be giving myself a little bit of a break on a morning and having time that's just for me, that's not for answering emails or dealing with Slack
Starting point is 01:00:59 or, or prepping for a guest or doing whatever it would be for me. That would be enjoyable. Uh, so that's a good cue. And I appreciate the question. Awesome. Thomas Williams, Williams, four Oh eight five. What clip length is your hairdo? So this is a, uh, two, two and a half.
Starting point is 01:01:23 So two on the sides and two and a half on the top. Actually going down to a one and a half and a two now, because I can't be asked going into the barbers every three weeks. But I think that if you've got the hair to pull it off, two, two and a half looks great, but it will grow out, especially if your hair grows quickly. Within three weeks, it'll be too long.
Starting point is 01:01:44 So one and a half, two or two, two and a half is the way to go. Harry C8433, I feel way too passive after getting rid of a large chunk of my ego. How can I build it back a bit? Feel like it took away my confidence. Love the pod. Dude, what an awesome insight.
Starting point is 01:02:06 That is fantastic. And I might write about that in a newsletter, shamelessly repurpose it into a newsletter. I think that's so good. I absolutely felt and probably still have felt a lot of this over the last six years. Many people may say that I'm full of ego and the internet may be right, but holy shit if you'd seen me in my 20s, a lot of the mindfulness and gratitude that I did really and learning to be more, learning to kind of embody my sensitivity a little bit more really made a massive difference to the ego that I had before.
Starting point is 01:02:53 And it did take a huge chunk out of my confidence, which I'm still building back. So I feel you on this one. The things that I've done to do this is to realize that confidence built around ego isn't true confidence. You didn't necessarily have, you had blind confidence previously. And I think that it may take longer for you to build this back, but when you have it,
Starting point is 01:03:21 it will be from a place of genuine rock solid foundation. It will be built on you knowing who you are and having justification in your confidence as opposed to you being a young dude that's young, dumb, full of fucking testosterone and made of rubber and magic bouncing through life with kind of an assumptive confidence. Also maybe the price that you need to pay to get rid of some of your ego, to have more equanimity, to be more mindful, to be a better friend, to be more sensitive. Maybe the price that you needed to pay for that was to lose some confidence. And an interesting question to ask yourself would be, is that a price that you would have paid? If you could have gone, if you answer it and say, if I could go back, I wouldn't have done that.
Starting point is 01:04:21 You need to really, really work hard to build it back up. If the answer is that you're glad that it happened. Okay. Let's start from a place of positivity. You're happy that this happened. That's something that was good. I think that that's probably something that was good for you to do. Um, building up confidence.
Starting point is 01:04:40 James's book, how to be confident is actually really, really good. Alex's insight about you don't become confident by shouting affirmations in the mirror, but by having a stack of undeniable proof that you are who you say you are is also good. And remembering as well that if losing your ego killed your confidence, I don't think what you had was confidence. It was something else. And you are now starting from baseline. So
Starting point is 01:05:10 which is such a wonderful, that's such a great insight. I'm going to copy it over into my newsletter notes now actually, that's such a great question. So this is one thing that I love. I fucking love this doing the Q&A's. I know that I moved through the questions very quickly, but selfishly it's because I want to see as many of them as I can and get the opportunity to answer them while I speak. So that's how I think best.
Starting point is 01:05:36 The questions that you guys come up with are the things that I struggle with and seeing questions that I've journaled about previously or ones that I felt, like this is one that I felt, but never actually verbalized. It's so, it's just so great. It's so great to feel like other people see you. And I think that that's what hopefully the show is to you guys,
Starting point is 01:06:05 me trying to learn to open up and be less of a performative autist around, this is how I feel, this is my history, this is sort of what I'm dealing with and asking some expert about why is this this way? But it's just seeing questions that see my condition and probably a lot of your guys' conditions too, I think is just fucking great.
Starting point is 01:06:27 So bravo, Harry. Bit by bit, continue to do things that are undeniable stacks of proof and realize that what you had before wasn't confidence, I don't think. Isaac Majangos, when are you going to get philosopher Tim Dillon on your podcast? Been here since 97k. Wow. Well, thank you for being here for so long.
Starting point is 01:06:52 I am going to LA in a couple of weeks. And Tim is in LA. And if our schedules align, very well, maybe on the show. Juan Granados, what are you wildly insecure about, even if it's not true? Fucking good question. Well, the problem with wild insecurities is that your ability to assess their veracity is usually terrible. Most of the things that you're wildly insecure about, you have no idea if it's false. For me, still lots around wanting to be respected and liked and a fear of being left out of things
Starting point is 01:07:38 and this sort of permanent sense of being on the outside and observing what's going on, not in it. I'm, I'm an observer, I'm an orbiter, I'm an out outside participant in many things. And I think this is a big carryover from when I was a kid. And that certainly was my experience in school. Uh, and even in sport, you know, even in the sports that my chosen sport, which is cricket, which I was very, very good at, uh, even that I didn't feel like
Starting point is 01:08:11 anybody had my back. I wasn't part of a group or a tribe. Um, I didn't have a squad of friends, uh, and only child thing obviously doesn't help because I guess you kind of, if you've got brothers and sisters, I don't know how that works. But if you've got brothers and sisters, I suppose, you kind of have to have their back at least for a while until you're old enough to be able to say, I'm dumb, or you're a dick. So a lot of it comes up around that. a lot of it comes up around that, still worthiness and sort of being good enough. You know, I've had this strange ambient sense for maybe the last year that someone's mad at me, and I don't know why, and I don't know who, and I don't know what about.
Starting point is 01:08:59 But just, you know, you know what I mean? You've done something wrong and that someone's mad at you. So that's been there. And then patting myself on the back about things that I've done well, also insecure about, how good was that? Was that good enough? It was, was it the best that I could do? What does the best look like? This is one of the dualities of having high standards, I suppose that
Starting point is 01:09:36 you basically can never meet them. So many things, I guess, and a combination of opening up emotional work with therapy and maybe not being in the most robust place in terms of health and sleep over the last six months has been a really ruthless cocktail. I may look back on this in six months time and go, gay, or I might realize that this is a justified insight, but many things, many things, and that doesn't necessarily get any easier as more people watch the show,
Starting point is 01:10:22 as there's half a billion people you're scrutinizing what you do, your wild insecurities seem to be amplified, not diminished. I think that's gonna change. Bon, hey Chris, do you like that you have a 54 year old granny who listens to your podcast and loves it?
Starting point is 01:10:42 Bon, I couldn't be happier that you're a 54 year old granny that listens to this podcast and loves it. Bon, I couldn't be happier that you're a 54 year old granny that listens to this podcast and loves it. Not necessarily the immediate target market, but we're an equal opportunities wisdom dispenser here. So thank you very much for being here. Jasper Hamill, do you ever find all that positivity and wellness stuff a bit depressing and you yearn for a nice reassuring bit of self-destruction?
Starting point is 01:11:07 Fucking brilliant. So The positivity bit, uh less so Uh, but the wellness stuff absolutely what you do have to remember is that i'm like Who's the guy that shot samer bin laden rob o'neill? I'm like the who's the guy that shot Simon Bin Laden? Rob O'Neill. I'm like the Rob O'Neill of self-destruction and partying. I know that the internet didn't get to see me basically until I was 30. But my God, I served my time in the trenches from 18 to 30 years old,
Starting point is 01:11:42 just endless amounts of parties in different countries, at different times, in different cities, with different drugs, in different venues, different music policies, every type of party. I'd done. And I still feel like I'm on self-destruction sabbatical from that. Kind of like some dude that trained for the Olympics, you know, he was a child prodigy in the fencing or the rowing or something, and he did it and retired at 22 at the ripe young age of 22.
Starting point is 01:12:14 That's me with partying. That being said, yes, the over optimization, up its own ass, positivity wellness thing, the like absolute protocol maxing side of stuff, just is becoming more and more lame. I think people are so switched off by lots of that now. And I did six months sober at the start of this year, broke that in Nashville a couple of weeks ago, or yeah, a couple of weeks ago.
Starting point is 01:12:45 So I'll be having a few beers, sniffing vapes maybe with Luke at the end of this year. I have an interesting relationship with partying, I suppose, because I just did it so much. Served my time in the trenches, the vanguard. Uh, but there is a place for that self-destructive behavior. And I think the, the people who are unable to, uh, ever let go of that are in a particular type of fragility too. So who knows, maybe this is the, uh, wrestle tales. Why do you look the same for like two fucking years now? Why do you look the same for like two fucking years now?
Starting point is 01:13:31 Do people age that much in two years typically? I have the most basic bitch skincare routine in history, which is wash your face and then put moisturizer on after the shower? I would be worried if I did change in the space of two years. I suppose you must change at some point, right? There must be some two year periods in which you really do change. Anyway, I don't know. All the baby blood that I'm drinking from Mike Isretel's cellar. Jack Kunak, what do you think of circumcision?
Starting point is 01:14:10 I knew it! Coming back around. Should it be done to infants? Is it barbaric? Jack Kunak. Uh... I mean, look. I see no fucking justification for circumcision. I see no fucking justification for circumcision. Any guy that says, this includes Mike actually, Mike wishes he was circumcised. Any guy who says that circumcision is a benefit, that it's somehow benefiting them,
Starting point is 01:14:42 unless there's some weird fucking medical abnormality down there that you need to chop a bit off the top. I promise you it's not. The, and I know this from Yousef, who has a very detailed map of all of the different types of foreskin that can happen. And he once lectured me about this over dinner. So I know. of foreskin that can happen. And he once lectured me about this over dinner. So I know, it reduces sensitivity in the penis. It, I know so many guys that are circumcised
Starting point is 01:15:14 that basically struggle to come during sex and basically can't from oral. I just think, God, what a brilliant thing it would be if it was just five seconds like the rest of us. No, I do think it's fucking barbaric. It seems pointless. It's like some non-zero number of babies die per year from this. And it's not even people that are Jewish.
Starting point is 01:15:36 I look, who am I to step in and try and tell some religion to do or not do something, but culture, culture, sorry, American men. Why? What's going on? I don't understand. Maybe someone needs to teach me why it is that most Americans, we were in a sauna, cold plunge place a year and a half ago for a friend's stag do. And there was a through the back of the gents, changing rooms with
Starting point is 01:16:05 this huge plunge thing, warm plunge, cold plunge, sauna over the far side. But the whole thing was nude, like guys only dudes. You'll notice that all of the guys getting out of the hot bath didn't mind, but all of the guys getting out of the cold bath had their hands over their junk. Um, I think I was the only guy in there with a foreskin. the cold bath had their hands over their junk. I think I was the only guy in there with a foreskin. Fucking wild in this country. Defund circumcision.
Starting point is 01:16:30 That's what I say. El Huchin. Is having a small penis a skill issue? Ben definitely put these together in order. Is having a small penis a skill issue? Yes, everything's a skill issue. Circumcision is also a skill issue. Not having a foreskin is a skill issue.
Starting point is 01:16:51 There is no question today that I couldn't have just answered with skill issue, skill issue over and over again. Cosro, why should I care about your subscriber numbers? You don't need to? Why should I care about your subscriber numbers? You don't need to? You don't need to, at all. I don't think that I really should care about my subscriber numbers,
Starting point is 01:17:13 but as you just learned, Cosro, we need to celebrate our small wins. It is the way that we are going to keep ourselves motivated and rejuvenate ourselves ready for the next thrust. Juan Granados, when, what are you looking forward to in your Australia trip? And how can we make the trip more enjoyable for you? What a lovely question. What would I like?
Starting point is 01:17:33 I would love to have some good Aussie food. I would really love to experience that cool pool where the sea comes up onto it. And I would just like you guys to bring the curiosity and the energy and the inquisitiveness that I get the sense that you all have. The, by GDP or whatever it is, modern wisdom is bigger in Australia than any other country. So I'm kind of low key thinking that this Oz tour is going to be the craziest one of them all. Just because first off, Australians don't exactly have a reputation for being chill
Starting point is 01:18:21 people. And secondly, it's in terms of density, the highest place on the planet that supports the show, which is wild. I don't know what that says about me, but I appreciate you all. Oh, that's it. I made it five hours sleep, one Starbucks BAP, breakfast BAP, and a little bit of water and no caffeine. I haven't had caffeine for a while because I've been on the road and
Starting point is 01:18:48 I haven't been able to get new tonic. Look, I appreciate all of you. I know that I keep on doing these Q and A's really quickly because the show keeps growing, but I like it. I like checking in with you guys, seeing how you're getting on. What else is happening? New tonic restock is now available. newtonic.com slash modern wisdom.
Starting point is 01:19:05 That's available next day delivery, UK and US. Huge August coming up. Absolute monster August with a ton of big guests coming up. And then Oz tour November. And then this Isra-Tel thing will happen before November as well. I am gonna have some food and go to sleep. Appreciate you.
Starting point is 01:19:27 Bye.

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