Modern Wisdom - Jocko Willink, Matt McCusker & Jeff Dye - Mostly Wise #3 - #1139

Episode Date: August 20, 2026

In the third episode of Mostly Wise, we explore: If Matt and Jeff could survive Navy SEAL selection, training and hazing. Whether the Navy actually has trained animals like killer assassin kamikaze dolphins. How the guys deal with their own versions of sobriety. Why Love on The Spectrum is potentially problematic. What it was like for Jocko to be in the Military on 9/11. The story of the gun no manufacturer dared to make after testing it. And much more... Guests Jocko Willink is a retired United States Navy officer in SEAL Team 3, an author and a podcaster. Matt McCusker is a comedian, writer, author and podcaster. Jeff Dye is a comedian, actor, television host and podcaster. Sponsors: See discounts for all the products I use and recommend: ⁠https://chriswillx.com/deals⁠ Get 35% off your first subscription on the best supplements from Momentous at https://livemomentous.com/modernwisdom Get up to $350 off the Eight Sleep Pod 5 at https://eightsleep.com/modernwisdom Get a free bottle of D3K2, an AG1 Welcome Kit, and more when you first subscribe at https://ag1.info/modernwisdom Get 160+ lab tests for just $365 and save an extra $25 at https://functionhealth.com/modernwisdom Get ChatGPT to explore ideas, solve problems, and learn faster at ⁠https://chatgpt.com Extra Stuff: Get my free reading list of 100 books to read before you die: ⁠https://chriswillx.com/books⁠ Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic: ⁠https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom⁠ Episodes You Might Enjoy: #577 - David Goggins - This Is How To Master Your Life: ⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Goggins⁠ #712 - Dr Jordan Peterson - How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs: ⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Peterson⁠ #700 - Dr Andrew Huberman - The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain: ⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Huberman⁠ - Get In Touch: Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx⁠ Twitter: ⁠https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx⁠ YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast⁠ Email: ⁠https://chriswillx.com/contact⁠ - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Did you guys ever consider a career in the military? I remember I was in graduate school and I would get the reserve emails and I really thought. I was like, damn, 20 grand right now. I was like, I remember my wife's like, dude, anyone I talked to was like, you're going to hate it. You can't just go away. I'm like, it's just weekends. And they're like, yeah, every weekend for like, what, four years? And I was like on the brink.

And then they were like, yeah, I'm not doing that. I've never considered it ever, ever, not even once. You could have done a career in comedy. I don't know, this could have been a, we could have found out that everyone's original life plans had crossed over. I wish I would have done it. I could have used some structure, some discipline, some older male influence. I could have used some, everything that the military teaches, I think I needed and would have been great. But because nobody was giving me the discipline to go, hey, you should go do that. I didn't do it. Yeah. You didn't even have the discipline to start becoming discipline. Yeah. When you grow up like me, dude, on the mean streets, you know, it's either gang life or basketball. And I chose, no, that's not real. I remember, do you know what it was?

I remember they repealed, don't ask, don't tell. And I was like, all, I can't join you. What's that? It was if you're gay. You're not supposed to ask someone if they're gay. Now I think you're like a loud ask. I don't know. What do you even happen with that?

I think guys just ask for their papers. This is your area of expertise, Chuck. What happened with? There was a time where, are you a gay citizen? Yeah, you couldn't, if you were gay in the military, you couldn't say anything. So it was they weren't allowed to ask you, but you weren't allowed to tell anything. But could. you fuck jacco

who cares about telling people you go I know that's all these college kids too I'm pretty sure you could yeah thousand guys on a boat I can't confirm that myself I can't confirm no deny you just put in your earplugs in the bunks like these guys just statistically if you have a thousand guys in one boat that's gonna happen

that's carnival crew that's one of these guys you just got to be first you know and if they're gonna get me well I mean it doesn't have to be like that man oh I didn't know god damn man I didn't know where we're headed is there a height limit in the seals

I have to, like if someone's taller, right, like you only want, six, four, yeah. Yeah, you get like six, six, six, seven. There's just more of you to hit. I don't think there's a high limit because there's a guy that I think is six, seven or six eight, something like that. What's the shortest guy in the seals? I know no woman has ever cracked it. I want to say five three.

Oh, yeah. That's a bad dude, though, five three and still did it. No women. Do you guys know that? In the seals? There's never been a woman named. Not yet. That says you, dude.

What is that French? NBA player that... She wouldn't make it. That's the current trans... Have you seen this guy, girl? Yeah, she's going viral all week. She's having a good week.

She's probably real happy about all this WNBA Krafel. Yeah. Do you know the story? Can you explain? Every video is popped up. There's just a trans... Yeah.

It's a biological male that transitioned into a woman who's playing in a professional women's basketball league in France. And because the Sophie Cunningham and all the issues in the last few weeks with the XXXXY kind of campaign

drumming up all this trans talk. They're like, well, let this lady play. Draft her over there and watch how inclusive they'll be. But everybody's just showing videos of this like muscular. I mean, she's jacked. Really? She's almost like a guy.

I mean, I'm for it. I think it's time. The WMBA, yeah. WMBA is turning into it. It's a drama now. Yeah. It's like racial kind of tension. Throw that on top.

Sexual orientation. Currently, all of the straight chicks get bullied and stuff in the locker room. Yeah. You tell me this? Like all of the, yeah, it's like inverse homophobia. Bro, how pissed are they going to be when the first, when the first trans WMBA player is straight and white? They're going to be pissed.

And French. Do you know what I'm saying? Because she's trans, but, and they're going to go, look how inclusive we are, but she's still straight and white. I kind of want to turn the WMBA into, like, the XFL. I think we should just make it, like, even crazier. What's XFL? XFL was when Vince McMahon tried to, like, start his own football thing,

but it was like, it was just chaos. It was like NFL Blitz. You could have a guy on a sideline who at any time he'd just run in and hit somebody. It was fair catches. And then he was like, I was like, we're going to put cameras in the women's locker room. And we're like, what women?

That's football. He was just thinking of a WWE internal memo. But literally, that was the thing. The guy that did WWE tried to make a football league and it went badly. Yeah. One season. I remember the one, their jerseys, the names.

One guy's was like, he hate me. Yeah, they got to wear nicknames on the jerseys. I like that. That was cool. Yeah, it was like a spectacular failure. He tried to do, I think for maybe one year, and it just didn't work out. They brought it back. They brought it back like years later.

It did also bad. Yeah. Sorry. Bless you. I've done this a lot, guys. I'm very professional with this. Sneezing, interrupting. I'm sorry.

What do you think about this stuff, Jocko? It's interesting to listen to. It's like a day carry stumbled upon. No, I'll be honest. At first, I was a WMBA hater. Now it's like, it's exciting. I love the drama. Now you're telling me

you got some more, another dimension to the drama's coming in. It's like, yeah, this is awesome. Well, if they do it, I'll watch it then. If they start putting in some trans athletes, I'd watch that,

I guess for a minute to see if it changes anything. I think it will. Like, there's a pro girls baseball league right now. It's like a softball thing. I've been watching that and it's been fantastic. Oh, that's on in the gym. That's on in lifetime.

Yeah, yeah, it's good. Yeah, it's been awful. Softball pitches are... It's not about them being women. It's about if the product's good enough. So, like, if the women had eight foot rims and these chicks could dunk on each other and the court was a little smaller and the ball was a little smaller, I would probably give it a shot. But the problem is, like, I watch whatever the best of the

thing is. Like, I've got NBA. I can watch that. They're better than these girls. And so I don't want to watch a worse product. I don't watch high school baseball and then be like, you're being mean to the high school boys. It's like, no, I watch pro baseball. They're better than the high school boys. What about college? I also don't have a wife that's getting mad at me for saying any of this shit. I don't think wives I can think really. Wives don't care at all about the WMBA. Oh, really?

Yeah, no one has a wife who's like, you better show them from L.A. I don't know. Oh, yeah. They all care. But the number one consumer of female sports

is still men. Yes. Like, it's... Really? Yeah, the number one spectator. It's not women watching women's sports. I'll say 100% of the people who watch the WMB

are, uh, they all like women. If you watch the WMBA, you go home to pussy. Like, that's a rule. Do you know what I'm saying? If it's a guy watching the WMB he likes chicks and if it's a girl watch the dummy

Debbie he likes chicks or she likes chicks that's how it works nobody's ever dunked the ball and then went home to weiner that's not a it's all it's fair point it's all pussy testosterone yes but when you think about sports that don't have that skill gap like BJJ

that is just as popular or a lot of the UFC female UFC fighters Ronda Rousey was like one of the biggest stars in the world so maybe it is what's the level of skill if it's comparable male league to female league. Yeah. People turn up and watch.

Yeah, yeah, and you could not, it'd be really bad to watch females fighting males. It would not be fair. We've tried that a couple of times. It doesn't go well. I think the girls would beat them up too bad. That's it, yeah. Whenever someone, when enough people...

When it's on Pixar, they always win. Well, when enough people don't like a thing, I automatically like it. Like, now I like the WMBA. Now everyone hates it. I'm like, it's actually awesome. It's good ball. There's a question that me and one of my housemates ask, which is like, at what age do you think that you could beat the best in the world

in a particular sport? So, like, a 12-year-old elite-level soccer player? Like, are you as good at soccer as a 12-year-old? Like, the best 12-year-old in the world? No. Like, could you submit, you know, like, it's different, I guess, in BJJ because of weight classes and stuff like that, like, the best 15-year-old in the world. I wanted to do this on a show with fighting. I came up with this idea where, like, I want to, like, Yeah, you get a five-year-old in there. It's pretty easy for me. And then we go six-year-old.

I go, yeah. This is what I mean. And we just keep ranking up until someone beats my ass. And it's probably going to be an 11-year-old that just annihilates me. And that'll be fun to watch too. Do you train? No, that's another part of it. That it would be pretty quick, you know, you could find a 10-year-old bring my ankle and knock me the hell out.

But yeah, for sports, that's interesting. I don't know, because I'm not very good of soccer and shit either. How do you guys reckon you get on at SEAL selection? Jock got to kind of assess people for a lot. a good while. Like, if you haven't got a background, like, I think about this a lot. I've been swimming, so. You have been swimming a lot. Good to go, yeah. I'm pretty much ready to go. How hard it could it be, man? Ready to go, pretty much. Just let me know. I bought this watch at Panorra. It's Navy Seals,

so I think I'm ready to rock, dude. How much is it? What's the physical requirement? Like, what would you actually? The physical requirements are pretty low, actually. They're not anything crazy. And if you were like a normal high school athlete, you have the physical capabilities of doing it. Interesting. Yeah. But once you get in there, it's definitely challenging from a physical perspective. Only in the sense that you get so physically beaten down and broken down that mentally you have to be able to hang on. So it's, you know, everybody says it's more mental than physical. That's not really true either because if you can't climb that damn rope, then you're not making it feel. How high is the rope again? There's 30 foot ropes. There's 10 foot ropes. There's a bunch of

different ropes. That's just one example, obviously. But some guys, you know, it's all mental. No, you need to train physically because otherwise you won't be able to get through any of the basic physical competency test that you're going to get. But it is mental too because you can have total studs going through there and they quit just as much as a slacker. Now is the rope like a like a a frame wood thing that you climb up or you just have to climb lots of ropes, right? Yeah. And there's an obstacle course where you got to climb a bunch of different ropes. And then there's just straight up 30 foot rope like there's a 10 of them out on the beach and you just got to climb these ropes. And back down. Yeah, you make make you climb them until you can't climb them.

anymore. Dang. When you tell me a story, I was asking about why there's an age limit? And I think, is it 30, 30, 34, 35 or something? The selection tends to get. It's around 31, I think, is the actual cutoff. And occasionally a guy will get through that's like 32 or 33, got a special permission or special waivers, they call it, and then maybe a 33-year-old.

But that's, that's, it's rare. And I was asking about the cargo net. There's these huge big cargo nets that you climb up. And I think you told me a story. There's some dude who's like super. Fatigue got over the top and essentially from the top of a 30 or 50 foot cargo net with all of his shit on just like Just hit the sand but he was 21 so he's made of rubber and magic so he just bounced on to his feet and ran off What you know like just somebody hit sand from like a high

Yeah oh yeah it's sand landed and was largely okay and I think okay that guy Plus 15 years at like 38 yeah like you're dust yeah you've just like evaporate you be here for my attorney right away They take my house away if I break my leg you know that's That's a wrap on me. Were you able to pick very well, do you think, before people came in? Matter of fact, I was just talking to somebody the other day that did a bunch of years as an instructor and said, you know, could you eventually figure out who's going to make it? He's like, nope.

You can't look at a human being and figure out if they're going to make it or not. Interesting. Just can't tell whether they're 5, 3 or 6, 9. You know, you think that guy's too small or that guy's too big, it doesn't matter. Yeah. It's just there's something in their head that makes them not going to quit. I saw a thing on Netflix about the Navy Seals that pissed me out. They used to do this thing, and I believe they still do it, but this was Netflix, you know?

They said that once you get through the thing, and that's very hard, right? And then you go to a net, now you're in the platoon. You've done enough time where they go, you're in now. You've passed it, even after the buds. Like, you're in the platoon. Because sometimes you make it, and then you can get kicked out because you're not made of whatever. But then they put this thing on you. They punch it in.

All the guys go on, they punch this, like, this crest on. What's it called? It's called a trident. Trident on you. And all your stars, everybody, they get to give you a nice punch. But you made it now, so you're happy. They're like, they stopped doing this in 1994 because of hazing or something. I'm like, what?

You don't have to, like, worry about the Navy SEALs. You know, it's not like he's going to be like, after all of that, they put in, no, I need to file a report against my, like, what are we doing? Yeah. They still do it, don't they? I would be confident that they likely still do that. Good. Unofficially, of course.

It's ridiculous if they stop doing that. But that's what Netflix is. With the problem being that if you've been through eating sand for like a week with no sleep, some guy hitting you a little bit too hard on your new button isn't the biggest crime. Now it sounds kind of lame to do it at all. Well, no, it's not nothing. I mean, they're really putting it in your skin, so it's not nothing. But what I'm saying is that like, it's an honor.

At that point, they're like, I'm proud of this badge. Like, this should mark me for life. I don't know. With Chris, out, punching a keychain is kind of like. Yeah, well, we're not made of what they're made up. Well, you do that with a black belts. Black belts as well, right? When someone graduates.

Some people do. Yeah. They whip you. Yeah. He's walked down like a gauntlet of guys on either side and then as you get your belt, you get whipped. Not everyone does that. Some people do. Some people don't.

You know, just depends on the vibe of the school, what you're into. You've got to get that last little licking on somebody. I guess you got to know it before he's got the black belt and you need to respect him. Yeah. Whip it up like a dish town. Yeah. Yeah. Well, apparently they've said,

that to strangers just to confuse them. What is that guy's dealing here? He's ass. What's his problem? Yeah, they said we're like, you know, modern people are one of the first societies that don't have like a ruthless entry to like manhood. So like pretty much every other society beforehand,

you had to do like really shitty, fucked up stuff. There was like a thing that moved you from a boy to a man. Is that not the Masogi? Is this? It's something like that, isn't it? Yeah. Right of passage type. thing.

Like the Aspen dudes that jumped off the tower with like the vine around their legs. You ever seen that? No. Oh yeah. Dues somewhere in Africa they built like a tower out of whatever trees and bamboo and stuff and then they tie a vine around their legs and it stops them just short of hitting the ground. But yeah, that's their manner test.

Kind of not are they using for that? Good one, I guess. A vine? Yeah. The most gnaw like I go, can I get a new vine? I don't want to use the single in Jaco, man. No, they should just. do they used to do a thing called a sub-incision where they would take a boy's penis and slit a cut up the front of it oh i had this yeah you had this wow you're in like the tongue tribe

and west yeah they would cut it open so you would like i don't know it's supposed to remind you about like girls or something oh god but they would slice your dick and they would like heal what kind of girls are you like vaginas it was just kind of like yes is what vaginas are like they'd cut a giant hole in your penis and be like that's good It's called the sales. Then it would heal up and you would always, now you have like a man's...

I have no trouble thinking about girls and I've never had this procedure at all. How much more would I think of... You would appreciate the WAA? How much would you have unlocked if you've done it? Holy crap, dude. Unbelievable. Girl crazy.

Yeah, the things people used to do were crazy. They would do another one where they were just pick two villagers and they would be like, you know, a boy and a girl, they'd make him have sex and they would just crush him with logs. And everyone would be like, all right, happy New Year. Yeah.

What did that one was my kid, though? What the hell? It was pretty pretty pretty. Why'd we use my kid? You've been like Greeks throwing plates at a party or something. Yeah, this was like way, way back, like, you know, and like Papua New Guinea or whatever. You know, you're always going to have people that are assholes. A lot of this is just people that are assholes because, you know, you take anybody and they're like, and initiate people and they're like, and initiate people.

You know, good job, you know, good job. And then you're over here like with the scalp. Yeah, yeah. Right? There's always people that get real weird to go next level. It's the same. And that's why, you know, you talk about some of this Navy stuff. It's at a certain point of military indoctrination or military.

hazing rituals, there's always someone that's like, you know what, I got a better idea. And it's going to be doing something really stupid. You used to have like a safety guy. You know, if you, if you have a hazing incident going down or a hazing ritual, you have to have a guy that's like, okay, hey, bro, no, put the scalpel away or whatever the thing. Get off his penis. Because we're still. Yeah, we still do those. There's sadistic people. There are sadistic people in wherever, in any organization. And by the way, when you get rid of like the actual soft people, so Now you get rid of the soft people

and you just have military dudes. Like, yeah, there's even more sadistic people in there. So you got to have some kind of limits on what you're doing. Otherwise people are getting their scalpel on their dick. Like that pirate. There was some famous pirate. And the only reason he would climb to the ranks so much is because he was more psychopathic. He was like, I'll get him to talk.

You want me to cut his dick off? And they're like, what? And then he would like literally, and they're like, all right, that's the new guy. Like they would just out barbarian each other on the pirate ships for rank. That's one of the reasons that. psychopaths are supposed to have existed. Like, why would they prevail?

Like, why would they have stayed in the evolutionary gene pool? It's like, well, if you've only got 50 of you, maybe not that useful. But if there's a little few more of you, maybe you need some Vikings to go and raid Lindisfarne and like pillage and come back and not have PTSD. And you go, oh, like, you're actually kind of destructive in a small group, but pretty useful if you've got a couple of hundred of you. And there's, oh, there's enough people there. Yeah, we used to have this like a little, a little drawing.

in the SEAL teams. And it was a little frog man, like a little frog. And he was inside of a glass case. And it said, in case a war break glass. And that's true. Like there are guys, even if you look back at the historical, you know, military heroes, a lot of those guys were totally out of control as normal civilians. And then whatever, a war broke out, they joined up and they're a hero. And they have something to do and something to focus their energy on and something to put their aggression and their testosterone that's the 100% the guy you want. That's the tool. So it's rough when you're in peacetime

and you got these guys that are you know, they're Vikings, right? They're just born and bred to kill other people. And they're like, hey, actually you've got to be in a uniform inspection tomorrow. The guys are like, what? Those guys are weapons. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like stirring your coffee with your gun and they're like, what are you doing? You're like, using the wrong tool. That's all. These guys

are tools, you know? They're like weapons. Yeah. And they don't know what to do when people aren't using them as a way. What do you do with those guys? Just like a working dog, right? Like a working dog, you do, people say, oh, you got a German shepherd like, oh, this is it? You know, German shepherd like working dog. No, no, no. You don't want a working dog in your house. You don't want the dogs that we had in the military, you do not want one of those things as your pet in house. Because it will bite some people. That's what they do. That's literally what they're bred for and what they're trained for. And so you can't just have that thing in your house and

expect when the Amazon dude shows up. He's not getting a bite on his neck or his face. Like, that's what's happening. So there's guys in the military that are 100% like that. And they're barely hanging on. And when you're in a leadership position, you're like, you got to, hey, you got to check on those guys. You got to make sure that you give them some outlet for the aggression that they've got. What sort of outlet do you give somebody that isn't just more war?

Well, I mean, you luckily working out doing jiu-jitsu, boxing, fighting, wrestling. And again, you're doing that to mitigate the amount of aggression that this. Pressure release. Yeah, it's just like pressure release. It's not saying that occasionally a dude just doesn't go out in town and beat up like four bouncers at a bar or whatever, you know, yep, you got to deal with it. And it happens. And a lot of times those guys, you know, in the Navy, as your career goes on, you on your uniform,

you get stripes. I think it's one stripe on your sleeve for every year that you've been in. And if you've had good conduct the whole time, those stripes at a certain point, they all become gold. and if you don't have good conduct then you have red stripes so you see like in a seal team a bunch of those guys they've been in for 20 years

they got red stripes like they got in trouble here they got in a bar fight there yeah that's like it's like the rings of a tree and going like oh that yeah was a really rough one that was the one when he got back on the booth it reminds me of red dead redemption when you're going through and you're like it lets you know if you're a bad cowboy or a good cowboy as you're going

but since it's a video game you just go a fucking full bad cowboy yeah but that's the same thing like you can see your honor yeah it's like an honor kind of thing. It's been tracked. What are, without saying who it is or whatever, what are some of them, like, most extreme guys that you'd seen either in the Seals or that you'd heard about, like, people who had a, you're talking about very, very extreme people in a group of very extreme people. Are there any examples that sort of come to mind where you think, fuck.

There's guys that definitely would get kicked out of the military because they got in too many fights, got drunk too many times. And again, those guys, a lot of the times, those guys that you would want in war, 100%. So, you know, what you're looking for optimally is a guy that can contain that enough that they can make it and still deploy. Just about hold on. Just about hold on. And of course, you know, you need like the real professional guys and that are that are going to keep control of those dudes. Because if you don't have that, then it's going to get out of control real quick. And occasionally, like, platoons would get, this is in the SEAL teams, a platoon would get disbanded. They would just take a whole platoon and just disband a platoon. And usually

that was because the leadership didn't have control over the boys. And if the boys get out of control like that, there's nothing to stop them. And eventually there's going to get in enough fights and break enough stuff and, you know, just do bad stuff. It's a great script. Yeah, it's like the Lord of the Flies with the guys in the back of the class that always sit in a row and they always disrupt everybody else. And you're like, hey, no, you're going to be over there. You're running a different... The concept of the movie The Dirty Doesn't, right, is like, we got these guys.

They're all in the break. Like, they're criminals, but we've got this kind of mission that needs to get done. Cool. We'll tape them and put it over here. That's what we're going to do. So there is an element of that. You don't wake up like me. I'm a kid.

You ask a kid, what do you want to do when you grow up? Oh, I want to go carry a machine gun and kill people. That's not a normal thing, right? So you've got those people. that's what we want to do. And so, of course, you're going to end up with some people that are like, that can't really contain that as well. And it's, you know, it's a bummer.

But it's also, again, go look at the history of American heroes. Not all of them. Some of them are Boy Scouts, right? Some of them are legit Boy Scouts. And they were just good people that joined the military for God and country. That's absolutely an element of our American heritage. But there's another American heritage of Hell's Angels, right? You're in the military, but you could have been in their country.

the hell is angels because you want to fight and you want to carry a machine gun and kill people. That's, of course, you got people like that. And, you know, that's what the military is. It's made up of those. And the military puts, like you were saying earlier, you needed discipline. You needed some direction. And that's true for a lot of young men that want to fight. They want to carry a machine gun.

They want to go to war. If you don't join the military, what are you going to do? You're going to end up in some kind of a gang. You're going to be a criminal of some kind. So cool. join the military, we'll take that energy, we'll take that aggression, we'll take that testosterone, and we'll do something totally productive with it. And most of the time, you know, most of the people in the military, they're able to contain it and they get through,

or they get through their career, and then it's fine. Occasionally a guy, like, just as a little off gas happens, and boom, you get a little explosion and somebody gets stabbed, somebody gets, you know, whatever. Big fights happen and bad things go down and people get kicked out of the military, they get sent to the brig or whatever. The supplement industry is full of products making claims that they can't back, which is why I'm such a massive fan of Momentus. Their co-founder, Jeff Byers, played in the NFL and saw firsthand just how wildly the quality of supplements can vary. So he built Momentus around a higher standard. Every product for Momentus uses evidence-backed ingredients, transparent doses and independent third-party testing. Everything is NSF certified for sports, so what's on the label is actually what's in the tub. It's why Momentus is trusted inside all 32, nMendus. NFL locker rooms. It's why I've trusted them with my own supplements for years. Best of all, Momentus offers a 30-day money-back guarantee so you can buy it and try it for 29 days. If you don't love it, they will give you your money back, plus they ship internationally.

Right now, you get up to 35% off your first subscription and that 30-day money-back guarantee by going to the link in the description below. Are heading to livemomomomomomomom wisdom and using the code modern wisdom at checkout. That's L-I-V-E-M-O-M-M-T-O-U-S dot com slash modern wisdom and modern wisdom at checkout. Yeah, I remember I was in a I think I was in like Tucson And there was There's a bunch of Navy SEALs there

And they met me after a show We're always like hanging out And I met them before in San Diego And they're just chilling And they're pretty like It's like plain clothes It's just like pretty much flannels and shit And uh

These two girls were there Talking to them by the time I got there And then the girls were with these guys Who kind of came later And started kind of like Puffing their feathers up And they had no idea These guys were like Navy SEALs

And I was watching the whole time Like please fucking kids their ass. I want to see it so bad. But they were reserved. They had it. One guy finally went up. There was like eight of them. I'm like, dude, you guys are going to die. Well, they kind of know that there's been light work. Exactly. They were kind of laughing.

But at the same time, you could really see them kind of like, and then eventually one went up to him. It was like, said something to him. They were just like, okay, and left. Where can I get one of those working dogs? I hate my Amazon until they're very good. Yeah. I tell them, put the packages on the patio. Don't leave it at the door. The selection of working dogs is probably the most stringent, way more stringent than any military special operation selection process.

The amount of dogs that enter the pipeline to become a working dog is probably like one out of every 20 or 30 that actually become a full-fledged working dog. Any girl dogs? I don't know. I think so. Why is it? Why? He hates girls.

No, that's not true. He hates girls. He hates girls. He can't join the WNBA. Is that one? No, no. I was trying to say it would be that women can start using that argument. Like there's plenty of girl dogs in the native seals. They're probably, girl dogs are vicious.

That's what I'm saying. You probably want a girl dog. Jared, chat GPT, are the female working dogs in the seal, part of the seals? In the military. Yeah, what's the proportion? I want to know what the proportion of male. I want to make up for my earlier sexist remote. You're looking for equal.

Yeah, like that. He said a sexist. He said a sexist thing, but then he really won us over about the female dogs. Because the dogs can dunk, which is what's important. Right. I saw everybody, everybody was a girl dog, so she broke a lot of boundaries. Yes, they do. 73% male, 26% female.

We're back, ladies. Go up a little bit. Go up because the patrol and apprehension, okay, they're in there for patrol. I didn't see a patrol and apprehension at first. What are they, Belgian male laws for the most part? In the SEAL teams, it's mouse, yep, check. Because they're smaller. Yeah, smaller, easier to, like, jump with.

Did you see how high they can jump? Belgium Malwa? Yeah, they're so good. Dude, they can click up, they can, like, eight foot fast right over. They're insane. That's why I need one, man. Oh, they could, literally. I want to get Malwa so bad.

The first time I ever saw one to work. It was this training event. And we're taking down this big building. And they're like, hey, we've got to have this dog out here. And he's going to, you know, we'll show you how it works and everything. And I'm kind of like, whatever. how is this dog gonna whatever i just didn't really think much of it and all so they had a guy that was plenty in the dog suit that was going to run away from the target building and so i'm outside

on the you know ground force commander i'm watching they go hey you know here the guy's gonna run away so i'm watching the guy run away and i see the dog you know they're like they say whatever german words the dog and it things and just locked in i was like oh and then he says what gets the dog wanted blood yeah and he lets is a quick release that they have like a trigger on the leash pulls that thing and this thing bro it took off going a thousand miles an hour launched at this dude and just took him down like nothing and just started mangling this dog suit and i was like we want these things that's what we want yeah yeah it's so fucking art it's like the metal implants on the can it's like those predator dogs from that

movie i'm telling you it's gonna bunch of yours yours is in the fucking sidecar of your Oh, hell yeah. With goggles on. Hey, tell me where to get one of these. I kind of want a dog that will bite a stranger. These fuckers at the coffee shop, bro, is giving me a hard time, you know? I want a little respect around that. He caught him with a Malamara and a trigger.

It's on the sidecar. God, you don't want me to release this. Jock told me it's going to fucking be bad news. It's going to lock in. I don't know German, but. There's a guy, I don't know if he has. He's only made a couple videos, but he owns a convenience store, so he just, he has some sort of trained dog that he, like, unleashes on people loitering outside of the store.

Yeah, that's great. He only has two videos. We need more of that. He has to wait for his content. Two videos, he's in jail. That's what that means. He's just like, go. The dogs don't bite.

They come up. The guys are, Jesus Christ. Yeah. People are scared of dogs. There's a big, like, canine unit thing inside of the military, and then you guys have one for Seals, too? There's, yeah, there's, so there's just dog handlers, the whole military, almost all ground troops have some access to some kind of military dogs, military working dogs, yeah.

That's fucking cool. Seals should get some water animals, dude. They have them. They do? How does that work? Top secret. And I want names this time. They have.

That's how you get podcasting clicks. You can say names. First and last name. You exploit so. I don't know the name of this particular dolphin, but yeah. They have, yeah, they have mammals that work. That's wild. Yep, they do.

Yeah. Like a dolphin. Yeah. Like dolphins and others. China doesn't stand a chance against us. I feel like we're really breaking new ground sharing this. You might get in trouble. Yeah, no.

It's on YouTube. It's on YouTube. Yeah. That's sick. What do they do? You know, they perform various missions for... You're fucking with me, dude. No, I'm absolutely, I'm not falling for it.

No. I want to believe so bad. Like a dolphin with like a little turret on its head. It's not a turret. Yeah, it's a... Laser beam. Like a... I don't know how much this is available on the internet.

You have to ask your people for the internet. Okay. On the internet. Can we... Can we see military dolphins? I feel so dumb. If this is made up and I believe you. I want to see this shit.

I want to talk to the guy. No, I want to see if it's true. Jocker's making sure that he's not going to get popped by the DoD. True, true. Never mind. Don't either anything here. Yeah, don't risk it. Do you remember we were at dinner with Palmer Lucky?

And somebody asked him a question. You know, Palmer, he's a guy behind Anderil. He made the Oculus, which was that VR thing. Andrewill's a tagline, a war technology company is Fight Unfair. That's the tagline. It's so fucking hard. Jesus. And he has an answer for every.

if you just want to ask him some shit about like, hey, how would this have a military application? And we were at dinner. Do you remember someone asked him about, has anyone tried to make sharks, be useful? And he's like, oh, absolutely. Because the immune system of a shark means that they can go forever. So what you do is you get a bag of glucose, stick it to the side of a shark, put a fucking hypodermic syringe in. It never needs to eat. You use it as like a tracking animal and this thing can go for a thousand miles without having to fuel.

Yeah, but how optimistic. that's real optimistic you know because you go all right we got this shark we put a thing with the glucose

and the syrin and so far he's eating a thousand fish you know they don't need to eat but my point is he's not going to do

what you want him to do the dolphins how do you how do you the shark to go get these Russians or so yeah how do you

I wasn't in the technicalities I'm the ideas guy yeah because I just got the sharks he's swimming around out there we spent a hundred grand on this fucker

and now he's just to get all the glucose Does anybody thought on how to give him the orders? Was he supposed to be eating Koreans right now? He's out there swimming around trying to bang another shark with a glucose syringe on it. You know what I'm saying? Like it's not... I don't know.

I believe the dolphins. Dolphins are smart. Does ever get into the John Lilly? The military dolphin pro-grably. Dude, I'm going to smile and thinking about this tonight. Seth. Just restart that from the very beginning. What does he say?

I can't confirm or deny whether we have kamikaze dolphins. America's top military leaders. We're asking about killing dolphins. Can you kind of clarify these reports of kamikaze dolphins? The animation is so funny. The question sounds ridiculous, but the history behind it is real. Since the 1960s, the US Navy has trained dolphins and for military works.

Not reportedly to blow things up, but to do things like find underwater mines, recover lost equipment, and help protect ships and harbors. The program is called the US Navy Marine Mammal. Damn. And it still exists. In America was not the only country doing this. During the Cold War, the Soviet Navy built its own military dolphin program in the Black Sea. After the Soviet Union collapsed,

and the program is not back on the 6,000, the BBC reported that Ukraine transferred part of its military dolphin project to Iran. That's why this is made up now. The US and Iran are armed... Holy fuck, dude, is there a dolphin battle right now? Muslim dolphins. And now, even the weirdest pieces of military history are being pulled back into the conversation. So no, the Pentagon didn't confirm Kamikaze Dolphins,

but it did confirm something. something else. The standoff with Iran has gotten strange enough that weaponized dolphins are now being discussed at a U.S. military briefing. That's what? Also, you just think it's not going to go well, dude, because the dolphin's going to swim up to some fishing boat, you know, it's going to go, these guys got fishes up in there. You know, it's just not, you need control of these things. They're trainable. I've had it one in Mexico. Unreliable. I've had a dolphin in Mexico.

Friendly as ill. Yeah. Well, that's my problem. They're actually scary. He's going to come up to you, and then you go, what do you got? ticking on your back there, buddy. Dude, no, they're actually scary. I thought dolphins were like, you play in the ocean.

I would shit myself if one of these came up to me. They're huge. Dolphins. They're terrifying. They're big water dogs. I was in the thing in Mexico. You get, you getting like a little, it's like a little dock, but under the waters you can stand, they swim up.

And I was like, my kids were there and they're scared. I'm like, don't be scared, guys, we're right. Really? Just touch it. I was like, oh, my God. You go first, little buddy. Don't be afraid. That's bait.

Yeah, no, I think they're sweethearts. I rode them around in Mexico. before I knew it was not appropriate. I posted all the photos and everyone was like, you monster. I was like, I'm just kidding. It was a fake. You pet a dolphin, too? You pet a dolphin, too? No, I rode it around and shit. Yeah, like it was like a tourist trend. Yeah, like you could grab on its...

Grab its fin. My girlfriend at the time was small enough that she could... I just don't have a girlfriend anymore. It's not like... I have the same girlfriend, she's gotten bigger. Turn it down for that? You got to do the sperm whale tour? My girlfriend, back when she was small enough. No, but she would actually stand on that shit in there.

She was able to do it because she was, you know, little. But I had to, like, kind of lay down and, like, let him pull me. You're like boogie boarding. Yeah, I didn't know that they hate it there. Those dolphins, like, because they're meant they're like, they use echoes and they used to, like, miles of sea. Yeah. So it don't matter what you put them in, they're going to freak out,

and they're feeding them full of fish with little pills for ulcers. And, yeah, it's not good. But we didn't know any of that. We had a fun time. Yeah, it was a great day. It's like 200 bugs. Yeah, same way, I got there, and I'm like, oh man this is kind of sad

in that little pond They're looking to be like, help me. I was, I cheaped out. Give me your ride. Got yourself into this. Yeah, I cheaped out on the like, like, the Lord of the Sea thing where you kind of like hold both.

It felt cool. It looked awesome. Was this when you were sober at this time or no? No, this was a long time ago. Like 2008 or 2009. Okay. Yeah, drunken dolphin. We were drunk for sure.

Yeah, there's no way you're doing that sober. There's no like sober. Also, so many stories in my life are like, I went to a thing that was for kids. Yeah. And I'm the guy there that's like, yeah, I'll do this.

And then I was like, why's he out here? You're like, want to run the bases at the Cardinals game? It's just me and like a bunch of little kids. So there's so many of my stories are just drunk Jeff with a bunch of family things. Does sound bad when you say that a bunch of stories with drunk Jeff and a bunch of little kids. Well, it's like, yeah, these families are going,

why is this guy with all the kid? This guy sucks. Yeah, I went to a water park way too late. It was me and Shane went. Me and Shane went to a water park, and it was like a small one too. I came down the water We had like gym shorts too

We didn't batten suits Right Come down, you come down So you're instantly like vacuum sealed So just your fucking tiny Flash the penis sticking out And there'd be a guy just waiting for his kid There just be me like

My same age Just be like what the fuck are you doing this? Why should the kids have all the fun here? I can't tell you how many times We've been to like a shoe store And I see like one of those light up L.A. gear shoes And like you guys have this in a 12 And they're like no

Yeah We'll have them in four Size four. Wheelies would be so sick. I, yeah, I've never had. Any special ops, any special ops applications of the wheelies? I don't think so. That would be sick.

I don't think so. Let's get on it, dude. A guy from the UK ran a marathon in wheelies. Really? Stop. That's cheating, though. It was way harder. It was infinitely harder.

Like, because only, the only way that it's better is if it's mostly downhill. Right? I hope it's still. And he only wheelied for very small parts of it. And, like, if you think about how you have to run, you have to run right on the forefoot, or else you've just, it's basically an unstable fucking service. Don't they retract? I thought they retracted somehow. You know the technology of the wheelie better. You can't even talk about it.

Oh, you're classified. That's classified. What is everyone doing, though? Like, like, I just did a Navy SEALs podcast yesterday, Sean Johnson, the security guy for Joe Rogan or whatever. And he's a great guy. And he was like, yeah, our guest before us ran 500 miles. Or he ran on psilocybin or whatever. On psilocybin?

I go, why didn't you, what are we doing? Now it's not a, you hear about David Gogh. He's going to, the guy ran a fucking fuck tongue. And he goes, yeah, but this guy run a fuck ton on drugs. And he goes, oh, okay. Now this guy's running a fuck ton with wheelies. What's everyone up to? Did you see?

Pushing the envelope, man. What is it going on here? Having sex. He goes, holy shit, bring him in. I mean, dude, imagine. Because you know everyone's loved ones. You do a marathon. Everyone's, like, family and friends are watching. Just they're all, usually pretty. Yeah, you just that one glove.

It's cheating, though. Just kill me then. Just let me go out. It's a suicide. It's a peak moment. No one gives you water. They're like, actually, yeah. Nims Perger passed away.

That guy, he was the best death zone mountaineer on the planet. And he had the Netflix documentary, did my show, did Rogan show. And he passed away, just doing some mountaineering stuff. He was a

not Gurka, what's the he was he was but then he eventually went into British special forces S-A-S and then I mean he did these ascents and descents without oxygen like the most gnarly shit like oh we're at the top of Everest and some guy needs oxygen and we don't have any I'll just give him mine and I'll just go down normally and yeah he that was he did it

yeah so his old party was knocked out 10 guys can do that on psilocybin you know that might have actually been the thing that could have Fixed it. Maybe he could do that with wheelies. We could talk to us. Everest's wheelies is actually harder. The first guy to summit Everest without legs just happened.

Oh, Jesus Christ. This is what I'm talking about. That's so impressive. What do you? Get the video up. Just have a regular life. But he's trying to. He's got no legs.

I know. Also on Everest. You don't need to be up there. He needs to get up there. On Everest, apparently giant sheets of ice will just flip off and they could crush that whole base camp. If you and your partner sleep best at different temperatures, it is time that you joined us in the modern world and got an eight sleep.

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That's E-I-G-H-T-E sleep.com slash modern wisdom and modern wisdom a checkout. There's a documentary about the Nepal earthquake that happened, and it was during Everest climbing season. And I think there's one and then there's maybe an aftershock and another one. And it is fucking insane. Because most of Everest is the kind of valley. It's not actually, it doesn't look that much like a mountain. It's just this sort of big valley thing in between a ton of other peaks. And you keep going up and there's base camp one, two, three, four.

And then there's this special pass that's like a big fuck-off ravine. And you realize even from going up to coming back down, shit changes all the time. Glacier's moving. If you like far too loud, shit moves up there and a big earthquake that flattened half of Kathmandu, like that goes. And there's videos of just the gnarliest fucking. avalanche you've ever seen in your life. Yeah, God's just looking at us going, what are they doing? Stay down the hell's.

I gave him no fucking legs. Yeah, you can't read up there. He's still climbing around up there. God damn it. Like, what are we doing? There was a documentary on Netflix about it. Look at this guy. Look at him.

Yeah. Man with no legs makes history by climbing Mount Everest using only his arms. Also, maybe in the headline put his name. Don't call him man without legs. Look at that. See, that's what you should be doing. Damn. 34th birthday up there.

No store for cake. Former Russian paratrooper lost both of his legs in 2015. What did they drone that cake in? Both son. It is difficult. Is that AI cake? What's going on here? Dude, apparently so that guy John Crackauer who had the whole in a thin air thing,

he wrote that book being like, nobody should do this. It's so dangerous. You can die. And he said like years after it published the, what do they get the guides call? What are those who's called? Shirk. We're like, dude, we can't thank you enough, man. like thousands more thousands of people come

He made the industry When he did it He was maybe 450 people climbed Everest Like 10 years later after the book It was like 33,000 people So everyone had started there Like if that guy could fucking do it I can do it

That's what he said People will meet him People will meet him And Beck who can fucking do it Well now all these guys with legs They're gonna be like Yeah this is easy He's piece of shit

Got two legs You need to lose one leg But two legs and one arm And then I can do it And try and beat the record I got two legs and no cake I'm gonna be whipping up there I don't know.

Like I watched a documentary on Netflix where they were talking about this terrible avalanche that, you know, crushed a lot of people and it was a pretty heavy documentary. But they were talking about just working at the camp, setting up before the terrible thing happened in the story of or in the documentary. And they were like, yeah, we'd have to wake up every morning

at that time of season and go set off explosions. They would cause little avalanches just so that the people could be living there. And I'm like, why is... Yeah. You're already playing with fire. If you live in an environment where men and women have to wake up at 6 a.m. and go set off explosions.

Like, you're already in the lion's den. You're on the edge of a little. Yeah, what are we doing? Do you do, is the, if you go to do shit in the snow, which military subdivision gets sent to go and do that? Everybody trains for the Army and the Marine Corps and special operations. Everyone trains to do snow work. Right.

And the same for desert and the same for. Yeah. And, you know, there's some geographic. kind of destinations that are a little bit more obvious for some units. You know, if you're deploying over to Europe, you're probably going to do more snow work than if you're deploying to South America.

You know, so you kind of figure that out that way. It's pretty fucking cool. What's your favorite element or least favorite element? Man, I like kind of like them all. They're all a little bit different, you know? But growing, when I was growing up, you know, I was a kid in New England and like I thought I was going to be fighting in, you know, I thought it was going to be fighting in Vietnam.

But I ended up fighting in the desert and in the city environment. So I guess I'm kind of like that. So you went from humid jungle to open urban sand. Yeah, yeah. Or city, you know, the city environment. But they all have their own little unique challenges and it's always interesting. And you've got to get good at each particular one. And I would always say I'd rather be cold than too cold or too hot.

The woods. That's some main, right? The woods. Yeah, yeah. Bigfoot, you might be the guy. Oh, yes, right. You're a big foot guy, huh? Well, I'm just saying, let's get you in the woods back to where, you know, you know.

Back to the roots. And then let's get you to kill one of these fuckers. You're the guy. Could be. Could be. Why not, man? I don't know. Did you ever research igloos about, like, how much they, they're like, they can take,

snow can trap heat, like an unbelievable level. Really? Oh, yeah. I've never once looked up igloos in my life. You never been to a children's museum. Well, like, I, when I was in kindergarten, it's like, like A, B, C, D, and then when it gets to I, there's a picture of a fucking Igloo.

That's all I know about it. Look into igloos. Biggsome, make that your next drunk. Go to a kid's museum. I'm sober now. I've probably grown up a lot. That's the problem. It's just big foot and cigars, man.

I've grown up a lot. What can igloos do? They just trap like an unbelievable amount of heat. Like, wait, it's way warmer. They're not made of snow, right? Now you're fucking me up. There's not blocks of ice? They're like blocks of snowish ice.

Yeah. Snowball snow. What's that called? There's a snow that's a snow that. It's like snowball snow. Yeah, it's compactable snow. All right, okay, cool. Snow ice, I'm sorry.

Good. In your defense, you said you never looked it up. He did. That's true. I've never heard of fact-off. I just looked up to Riggily. I just write a placard at one kid's museum and I was like, whoa, it's like 400% of heat or something surprising. Well, there's a, if you fall in water in, like, snowy environment, you're supposed to take all your clothes off and then roll in snow, right?

Yeah, so you'll die quicker. They go, let's just fucking end this. You just roll around in the snow. Is that true? in the water and drown yourself. You definitely have to take your clothes off. You definitely have to if you're wet. Yeah, you want to get dried. I'm pretty sure that the snow is like absorbent because it's not, it'll help to get some of the water off you. Roll around in the snow. I'd also, I'd be a snow leopard in the winter. If I took all my clothes off, you would not be able

to see me at all. I'd be completely can't fly. That's your secret. You wouldn't see me at all. I'm for real. Like, my wife laughs because I actually did tan the summer, but I'll like walk to the shower and it looks like I'm wearing shorts. It's cool. My ass is so white. It's crazy. It's pretty cool. It's pretty awesome, honestly.

Now, I've never thought about how well I've went in to an Arctic environment. No clothes? I'm wearing clothes. It's actually kind of, I mean, yeah, I would show you guys, but it would be weird. But my ass is. I picture it's hilarious. I mean, dude, yeah, thank you. Because I've been in the condo for the mothership, so, like, I'm on the 20th floor,

and it's just all windows. I don't want to fuss with all the things, so I just kind of been walking around, like, You know, just in the, if I'm going to the shower, I'm kind of like, I'm going to whatever. But for you, they would see it from a distance to go, he's whatever. What can be striking. Also, if you're that high up, I, if you're like in, you know, if you're like a hotel in New York, if you're in a high window environment and a bunch of other windows, if someone sees you naked, that's kind of on them, really.

Yeah. I don't worry. If you're up high enough, it's like, I'm not. When I still think about it, like, I don't think that that, I don't think that was going to be that interested. I think they'd go, it's like a naked and they're, right. Like, that's not much more true. Did you ever see a naked person?

through window? Well, if they're having sex or doing something, then I would be excited. But just a guy in the kitchen eating a chewy granola bar? I would, no matter what, I would stare. I would stare for like 30 minutes. It's fucking naked guy. It's just crazy. We just watch some old guy, just watch TV because we could see it. I guess we're watching

him, watch a thing. It's an old naked man. I would sit there and you'd have to move. I wouldn't budge. I would just watch them. That's crazy. It's a novel. You never see a naked. You can get arrested for that, you know, right? No, not if we're both 20 feet up in the air. What's the floor? 20 feet.

What's the floor above which it's not weird? If it's ground floor, that's kind of weird. Ground floor is crazy. Yeah, but first floor is probably also not great. Yeah. Yeah, but I can only get to a window on the first floor, you know? Like, do you know what I'm saying? I've never been higher.

So how am I supposed to do this? I would say double digits. Double did it, double digit floors is international water. So if you got a Belgian Malinois, it might be able to jump high enough to see it itself. He can watch. watch whatever he wants, dude. No dog laws.

That's true. I remember one time when I lived in Philadelphia, I could hear my neighbors all the time. And I thought they were having sex. And I was like, oh, my God, I could hear him through the wall. And I was all excited. I'm like getting all fucking hard. Like, it's awesome. And then I just realized they're like, I was like about to beat off.

And then I was about to beat off. And then I realized they were just fighting. And I was like, ah, well, fuck. It's also kind of hot. Now I feel like it's a creep. The real bone killer. I feel like a creep. I could have, mom and dad.

It reminds me a mom and mom. dead. Truly nothing. Yeah, they could have made up, actually. That must happen all the time in New York. You're just so fucking on top of each other. Like, at all times, everybody facing, windows facing each other. And no one's got special tinted windows.

All these buildings are 100 years old. Yeah. It's got to happen all the time. I would imagine. Although I'm looking for it. I'm up there sometimes in a hotel. I'm the only just me. Well, that's what I'm saying.

Sometimes the view of my room is just someone else's room. Like, so that's what I'm always thinking about. In my house, I don't think about what I'm wearing, but I've thought about it all fucking week. Yeah. Like, people are looking in here. Does, is it, uh, Orlando airport that's got that huge hotel that's like right in the, I swear it's Orlando. Really? It's one of this Florida airport that's got it, the main TSA checkpoint is just floor to ceiling rooms.

So it's like built, the hotels built into the terminal. New York has one of those. And I always think, like these, these, the. They're just straight up windows, overlooking TSA. So there is the potential for somebody who's like, while they're getting frisked down to just luck up and you're just morning glory opening the other. Yeah, that's wild. Yeah, that's good. That's pretty awesome.

So I want to spend my time. I was watching people get frisked all day. Yeah, if you're into it. It's a power move. I love security. I just have knives next to my penis. Like, you wish you could do this right now. I mean.

How is sobriety going? I know that this has been great. Big pivot for you. How long has it been? two years and nine months. Was there like a straw that broke the camel's back? Like some children's event

that you went to you finally got kicked out of? Now stop saying children's event. No, nothing that stands out. I mean, getting arrested and crashing my car and fighting some cops, that part, it was that.

It was a big dramatic thing. It was a huge, it was a huge embarrassing. How'd the fight go? Terrible for me. You don't trade either, do you? Those boys can fight. Yeah.

I was a little, you know, it was a little blurry for me if I'm honest. So you're drunk, got in a fight, and that was it for you, you said, no more. Yeah,

because, I mean, like, also, like, I had been thinking I should be giving up the bottle for a long time. Like, it's in your mind. You're going, uh,

maybe, because drinking's great. And drink, it's fun until it's, until you get sad or until you, you know, until something bad happens

or till, so drinking has a lot of positive experiences, but it was, it was time to, time to wrap it up. But it's been great. And I,

in my act, I always joke about all the negatives of sobriety, but the truth is like it's fantastic and I'm very happy I did it. Unreal. Congrats, it's been great, thanks.

And what took its place? Well, I do work out way more now, which is even if it's like a crappy workout, I'm just kind of proud of myself for going. And then that gives me like a little rush of like, we did it today. We're in here, you know, we're doing that. And then I do smoke a shit ton of cigars.

Chuck. Yeah, those are the main things. Did you do drugs too when you were drinking a lot? Yeah, I was doing a lot of pills with the drinking, you know, because then I could stay. awake. All my friends would do like, you know, cocaine or whatever. And then like, I would be passing out from the alcohol. Is this funny? You're a comedian, right? I know, no. I love it. Sounds good. The coolest guy who knows just laughing.

I mean, this bitch, dude. It's a great follow-up question, too. So it was like Adderall and stuff? Yeah, because I would like pass out from drinking, like, at my house because I got a bunch of people over. But I would hear them having fun downstairs and I'm like, dude, I'm missing out on the party. Yeah. So then, you know, yeah. You just start popping pills and doing whatever to try to keep drinking. I've never done Adderall. What's it feeling like? Oh, like cocaine.

It's the same shit. Right. It is. Yeah, I can't have it. It acts like it's not. I can't have it. It doesn't help me study. I tried it in college.

I was in a library. I started just chatting with everybody. And then I took it, I took it while drinking. I got kicked out of a Beastie Boys concert. And then I snuck back. What did you do to get kicked out of a Beastie Boys concert? What's impressive? Well, it was actually, so for some reason,

whenever I take Adderall, and I've only ever taken a handful of time, while drinking. I get it in my head that, like, I have way more capabilities than I do. So I was sitting there, and I'm like, I'm just, like, I was on this, remember my friends had ground floor tickets.

I had tickets of, like, this, like, you know, not a balcony, but it was like, I was here and the floor was here. But it was like an eight foot or whatever, six or seven foot drop, and then I could climb back up and get on the floor. And I was like, if I look here, all the security guards,

if I time it where all their backs are turned, jump and jump up. I'll disappear into the crowd. No problem. No problem. Limitless, dude. Literally, I jumped down finally. And I went to jump into the crowd hoping to dissolve into this.

The crowd just completely part of around me. I get tackled by two security guards. They knocked one of my shoes off. So I'm walking out with one shoe. I go out and I'm like, man, fuck, this is bullshit. And I, like, just kick my other shoe off. And I saw, like, this. They had the chain leg fence where people smoke.

I just kind of found a gap in that went in, went back in. And then they saw my friend who actually back in that. It used to look like me. So they were, this is really shitty of me, but they were kicking him out, mistaken identity. That kind of this was like, that sucks. I kept going. The guy goes, saw the fact that I had no shoes on and was like, it's actually him. So then he goes back.

I get kicked out again. And then they were doing an Aramark working, like a shift worker thing. So when the people were changing shifts from the Aramark employees, I got in line with the Aramark employees. Again, still in my socks, walked in. And then I walked under the bleachers. I was near like dressing rooms and stuff. walked under the bleachers, crawled up,

and I found a gap between the bleachers, and there's just people like, it went seats, and my face just, like, came out of the water. And I just watched the concert next to them,

and then I walked all the way back from South Philly to West Philly. So Adderall. Adderall, yeah, not good for me. Yeah, not a good, I can't do it. It sounds great. It was pretty awesome.

So do why everyone isn't doing it. Adderal's great when you have OCD, too, because you just, like, organize a sock drawer you never looked at in your life. Yeah, I don't. I give myself the worst missions possible, and then I just, I do this.

them though. I get them done, but they're not. Oh, we're like a new hour of material in Adderall. It's all useless the next day. I'm like, none of this is funny. He was so enthusiastic about it while they were writing. Yeah, it was very organized. Like, that's going to be good. I've heard Adderall is like anti-comedy. Like people who have, like, I've done stand up on Adderall, it's just a different wavelength. It just doesn't translate. I've learned from over a thousand podcast episodes. The easier that you make your health routine, the more consistent you'll be. It's like golf, right? You want to keep it

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don't like it, they will give you all of your money back. Right now, you can get 20% off a welcome kit and that 90-day money-back guarantee by going to the link in the description below are heading to drinkag1.com slash modern wisdom. That's drinkag1.com slash modern wisdom. Did you get through the full like alcohol withdrawals and everything? Yeah, actually, it's kind of funny. I thought that I had COVID. I'm like, oh shit, just my luck, man. I get arrested and then I get out and now I got cold and then my doctor is like, no, dude, this is. This is a his alcohol withdrawal. And I was like, oh, shit, that's a real thing, huh?

And he goes, yeah. And so, yeah, it was a rough week. Yeah, that's like the one thing you can't quit cold turkey. Yeah. Or you can, but you can kill it. You can die. Oh, really? They hang on how that down the rabbit hole.

That and Xanax. Really? Yeah, you can die from Xanax withdrawal too. Well, actually, I will admit, I've never said this before, but so when I got out of you, I did start drinking again. I was like having beers and making light of it. And then, or not making light of it, but not, were you in jail for? A couple of days waiting for a judge, basically.

But when I got out, I was like, okay, no one found out. Because I thought to myself while I was in jail without my phone, like either everyone's talking about it or no one cares and no one knows and they just think that I'm not answering my texts. So when I got out, I realized no one noticed. But then, like, so then I started drinking again. I went back to my softball team, told some of my close friends about it. But then, like, once it got public, like once everyone started dragging me on the internet

and making fun of me, then I was like, All right, I guess they need to do some work. You know, like I need to figure out if this is... So the humiliation of everyone knowing about what happened is what made me take it serious. You know, I wrote a book called Extreme Ownership, which is about, like, taking ownership of what's going on. It seemed like another move could have just been like, own it.

Like, hell yeah, dude, it was a good night. I know, yeah, I know. You're a comedian, right? Right. You just be like, hey, yeah, I go hard. Yeah. Who's with me? You know what I'm jacked out?

Yeah, but also... Anybody drink a night? But my commitment to truth made me go, this is a problem. Okay. Yeah, like, because normally I will just own, you know,

any of my thoughts or opinions. I don't really care what people think about those kind of things. But I knew deep down, like, this is a problem. You're using this as a fucking... The social pressure was the big kicker as well. Yeah. Interesting.

I came off a 50 cent per day moped in Bali 10 years ago. And brakes go out from underneath me as I'm trying to avoid some truck. Land on the Balinese tarmac. All of this side of my arm is gone. all the outside of my foot is gone. Like just the left hand side of my body.

I had no skin left on it. But nothing broken. And my first sensation, I mean, the middle of the road, there's still Balinese people. Like, fucking idiot tourist again. Here we go. Like classic stuff. My first sensation wasn't like fear for my life. Am I okay?

Health concern. It was like, I look like such a prick. It was embarrassment. My main concern of mortal fear was embarrassment. Yeah. That was it. Yeah. Damn.

That's why, like, that's true. Like, I always say like with things like that you'll probably notice it the next day more, like when you're thinking, and you're going, ah, this kind of hurts. Like, because in that moment, you're just going,

uh, I got a fucking figure this asshole. Adrenaline kicks in and you're, yeah, trying to walk cool. Trying to walk away from the scene, cool. Went to a beach club.

Continued on to a beach club at these two Aussie guys that were traveling. So I don't want to look like I'm not too cool. One of them was like, I'm medical trained. I'm sure it'll be fine. Go to a beach club. He's got like alcohol swabs doing that.

Oh. Have you ever had alcohol, like a proper open, like good bit of burns. So bad. I thought that I knew what the ceiling of pain, like communication was that my nerves could give to me. And it just blew straight fucking thrott.

I could hear it. I was like, I can hear the fuck. I started laughing. It was so painful. I was like, this is absurd. How fucking painful it is. But someone just tucked the dial and, like, cranked it up to 100. Yeah, I had an ear infection when I was younger.

And I remember, I feel like they used to dump, like, hydrogen peroxide out of here. Yeah, they used to do that. And it bubbles. Yeah. So I saw. the bottle and rubbing alcohol was the same shape bottle. And I was like, I think this is the shit that my mom pours in my ear. And I dumped rubbing alcohol into an ear infection.

I cried. It hurt so bad. It was, it brought me to my knees. It hurt, I heard kidney stones are the worst. What's that? Kidneystones. I've seen guys that goes down. Pissed kidney stones.

What are they? Like, you get some kind of buildup in your kidneys and it has to come out. It's like pissing a rock out. It's like a lot of people too, by the way. It's like birthing a fucking little infection. It's worse than childbirth. Trust me. No.

Trust. But no, trust me. I know. Well, it's interesting you say that because we got, I didn't know whether or not I was going to do this. We also have Hunter Biden on the podcast on Monday. Nice. It's going to be fucking hilarious.

So it's either, we're going to do it today. I'm going to offer it to Hunter Biden. We have period cramp simulators here. This is some sort of feminist propaganda, isn't it? This is because of your WMBA thing. Yeah. I know. It can stay over that.

We even know. It's like some electronic thing, but we gave it to one of the, no, we gave it to one of I'm going to have to do it before Monday, if I'm going to get Hunter Biden to do it. Yeah, yeah. We gave it to one of the guys, and he said, I'm going to test it on my arm. And he had his wedding ring on. His wedding ring immediately started heating up. And he wasn't able to, like, close his hand for, like, a couple of hours.

Like, Nick couldn't feel his fucking arm. You ingest or do you inject it? No, it's like a, it's one of those kind of like an ab machine type thing. Got it, got it. And it's supposed to simulate. You immediately start watching sex in the city. Yeah. Yeah.

We immediately order stuff off of Amazon. My first kid, my wife was pregnant with our first kid, and I went to the class where you're going to go through like the birthing stuff. And so I'm in there and, you know, I'm being Mr. Supportive dude, whatever. And, you know, the woman's teaching this breathing and stuff and telling me what to do. And like, and she's like, she can be in a lot of pain. And I said, you know, what's the pain from? And, you know, just kind of, you know, I've gone through like combat trauma and all that kind of stuff.

What's the pain from? woman's like, you'll never know. And I go, no, no, I'm not saying I'll know, but like, just what's causing the pain. She's like, you don't understand what it's like. I'm like, okay, it's okay. It's all good. I'll just sit here and be quiet.

Yeah. That's you told. Also, I would pay any money to see you in like one of those classes. Yeah, you just watch. There was only one. And I was like, hey, I'm not welcome there by that woman. You're like, I have access to empathy. Can you please explain science?

No, man. Briefly, there is a short window that this special operator is actually able to feel feelings. I'm desperately trying to understand what the love of my life's going to go through. Okay, I tried emotions once and it didn't go well. It was going to be both in class. You got your own woman. Dude, they're shitty. When you're like the guy in the hospital, they're like really shitty towards you. I remember we were like, I was with my wife and we had like hours and hours and I was like kind of point man. I would run home, do stuff like the dogs come back. June labor. Yeah. And we had like, we had plenty of time. And I was like, and they were

scheduling a C-section. I was like, well, what time are you doing this because I have to let the dogs out? but I was just like, do I have hours or should I stay here? And they were like, literally, she goes, what do you have somewhere else to be? And I was like, is this going to happen right away? Like, what's the move here? And she was just a piece. I felt like a piece of shit for even asking. Like, hey, just, I got to do all this other shit too.

Like, you know, it was my responsibility to still, we couldn't get someone to watch the dogs. Yeah. So I was like, fuck the dogs if we're doing it right now. But if we do have three or four hours, I can jump over. Yeah, like, what the fuck? And the lady, you would have thought I had been like, you like, all right, well, hurry the fuck up. I was like, just curious. I wasn't in a rush.

I was like trying to help. They're shitty towards you. That sucks. I think the reason for that is it's obvious the price that chicks pay when they go through labor. And any guy that isn't like completely attuned to that just is seen as callous or flippant or not caring. Like, you know, you desperately trying to understand. Hey, please explain to me where this is coming from. Hey, we also have these fur babies at home and it would be really nice if we made sure that they didn't.

Sure. We had been there for a day and a half. So it wasn't like we had just gotten there. We'd been there. We were doing all this stuff. She was guessing to be like, yeah, lots of places. It's been a day in the half. I was like, I just want to know.

If I can, I can. I'm masking you. Completely, you would have thought it was insane. And the worst part, too, is like, for the C-section, like, they dress you in scrubs. So, like, they took her back. You look like you work there? Well, they took her back. And they're just like, here, put this shit on.

And I'm like, fucking like, okay. I'm like crying. I'm like trying to put away. Then I'm just like in the hallway, dressed up like a nurse, just like, where do I go? Yeah. Get back there. I'm like, I'm like, oh, rude. Fuck sorry, guys.

You never feel like more of a boop than when your wife, you know, has a kid. It's true. You're like, shit. They really, someone should do something about it. You got to sleep on a shitty couch the whole time. Yeah. And there's really nothing. You did literally nothing.

Sipolis. Yeah. Oh, God. You're just nothing. Like, everything you say is wrong. It's just, it's just, it's just stand there, you know. I want to know. what your bachelor party looked like.

What does Jocco's bachelor party look like? I don't think I, I didn't even have one. No bachelor party? Yeah, I mean, my wife and I got married in the San Diego courthouse, you know, like on a Thursday afternoon. I was wearing a t-shirt and a pair of surf shorts and flip-flops and went down and got married. It was a minimum viable wedding.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who was your best man? I didn't have a best man there. Just like my platoon chief came down and was like, do you have to bring a witness? So I was like, hey, chief, and he's like, yeah. So he just went down there and got it done. Sorry, referring to your wedding just went down there and got it done.

In and out, you're wrecking tongue. You know what's really crazy? We've been married for like almost 30 years. Yeah, you know. Unreal. And she's British. She's a great, yeah. Yeah.

Who needs flowers. Yeah. Me and my wife actually did it during COVID. Same thing. We got a packet of papers from City Hall. Pennsylvania is like a Quaker state technically. So we did it. It's called a Quaker ceremony where you just get,

the packets from the city hall, bring it home, you sign it, and you have to give it like 48 hours. And then like your neighbor can come witness and sign and then you're good to go. Yeah. Would you give it 48 hours for them? Like to let it cool or something. Yeah, let it cool out. Yeah, it doesn't just, you know. Sober up. It's not Vegas. You know what I mean? We got to cool out. We did do a, I don't know if there's an official thing, but they called it a blessing where we did like a marriage thing in England where we pretended like we were getting married even though we were already married. Yeah. And everyone knew that we were dressed up and. Yeah, we dressed up and all that stuff. It's like the ceremonial way. Yeah, like a ceremonial way in. Exactly. We did the ceremony,

even though my wife was pregnant at the time, you know, which was fucking, same thing. Yeah, we did that, we had a party afterwards and she was pregnant for it. Tier one. Ceremonial wedding. Yeah, we're at T1. We're both Tijuana. It's how you do it. You go handle it, and then we did the dog and pony show for the civilians. There you go. It was the same exact thing. She was pretty pregnant for the wedding, yeah. Yeah, my wife was like, kind of pregnant for the wedding. You could tell. I could tell on the pictures. You're kind of like, Oh, good to go. Oh.

Can you get it happen? Oh. There we go. Has dating changed since you've stopped drinking? Yeah, it sucks now. Yeah. Why? Because drinking was a whole part of it.

Is it the women got uglier for you? Yeah, who's this? What's her name? Yeah, that is way harder. Because drinking is the easiest thing. You want to get drinks? You want to go like, it's just the way. And now, like, you know, you know, you're going to a coffee shop and both get nervous in

front of each other? Exactly. That's what it feels like. Like, I literally, I've been hanging out with this woman who I really like, and she's like, I literally texted her because it was just not going well in the text. You know, she's a girl I know from comedy. And I was like, hey, I think you're really attractive and you're nice to me. Like, would you like to go out?

Like, I just had to eventually, like, just be direct. Say the thing. Yeah, because I couldn't just be like, we're getting drinks after comedy. And then we would have, like, flirted there. And then that would have went, whatever way it would have went. It's like love on the spectrum right away. I'd like to see you. It feels exactly like.

And then we watch anime and drink down and do for dinner. You're saying sober dating is like Love on the Spectrum. It is. Okay. Hard. It's not going well. What do you think would happen if the Love on the Spectrum was done with booze then? Would that just turn normal?

What do you mean? Like if... You're saying you got him drunk. Yeah. I think they can drink, can't they? They can. They can. Oh, yeah.

They can order drinks. That would be, yeah. You know... If it's not spicy enough already, we can just like throw it over the booze. Just turns into Love Island. Yeah. Just can get his adroll dealer through. Yeah, yeah.

Spike in the drinks, they go, we didn't even know. Yeah, it would devolve, I think. Yeah. I think that's like a very heartwarming, pure show. I don't like it. I talk trash about it all the time. Why? Oh, multiple reasons.

What's the number one complaint? Well, they don't pay them, first of all. Two, everyone's watching it like we're watching children dating. They go, isn't it cute? It's very condescending to look at grownups and be like, oh, they're dating like we do. And like, I wish for the best. It's very, my biggest problem with it is it's called love on the spectrum, but they don't respect the spectrum.

They'll pick some guy who's super high functioning and pair him with some girl who's super not high functioning and be like, maybe this is a match. And then they're on the date and he's like, I think you're great and I think you're wonderful and I think you're awesome and I think you're pretty. What about me? And then she's like, oh, handsome. You're like, that's not a match. That's perfect.

No, it's not perfect. But my point is like, I don't like it. I think everything they're doing is like too exploitive. I don't think it's good. I was so ready to push back. I thought it was going to be a really judgmental. take from you and it's really convincing. Yeah, and also. It's actually kind of convincing.

It's so, here's the thing. We're seducing them with celebrity now. Now they, like, think they're famous. The one famous couple already broke up. She's on, like, everything now. It's just, it's too much. Yeah, that's fair. Although it's so sweet, though, like, you're seeing them. They're with their parents and, like, they're like, this never would have happened. I don't know. I watch that. He's doing the exact same thing. You just said.

That's what I'm saying. But it's so, look at them. Look at them. Dude, they're living the dream, dude. They're already fine. Leave them alone. They don't need a wife. They're frustrated, they want to have to date. They're so frustrated. What? There's another part of it that is like they have a diagnosis, right?

That they don't like bright lights and loud noises. The high pressure situations make them buzz. And then we're like, how about we put them 10 camera shoot on Netflix? How about we keep interrupting them every five minutes on a fucking first date? You're like, leave them alone. If you want them to date, that's fine. But maybe don't exploit them on a television show. Not paying them.

It's crazy. No money. has that James you know James right uh which one is the guy who goes sword guy Renaissance fair like that guy he's got liquid he's got I've seen every episode and I'm rooting for them as humans I'm saying that when you watch the show it feels a little icky but what about

you got to push past that he's doing great he's got he's got he's got liquid death sponsorship that is the most human answer I've ever heard what a great moment he's got a liquid death sponsorship he's got to push back past that listen he's got swords liquid death sponsor He's got the liquid desk sponsorship.

I started watching an episode. And I kind of, I didn't, you articulated what I kind of felt when I was watching. I was like, this is just, I didn't feel good about myself watching. I didn't watch like five minutes. I'm like, okay, this is enough of this. If you've ever saw a 40-year-old dating another third, like 45-year-old or whatever, and you go, isn't it cute? It's like, don't talk to them like that.

They're not retarded. These are grown-ups with autism. Like, treat them like adults. I'll be honest. You would never go to someone's table and go, oh, are you two having a good time? this is, I really support this. You're like, get the hell out of here.

Like, it's mean. They're adults. So, yeah, I watch it and I laugh the entire time. Yeah. And then I cry. Yeah, they get me every time. I like their directness, but that's just autism. That has nothing to do with dating.

I say, it's so funny. Yeah. I also think that's what's going on inside of every single person dating. It just doesn't come out the same way. Yeah. Same thing. The people in love on the spectrum don't have the filter that everybody else puts up. Yeah, and I like that point, but I like that about autism.

I don't need them to be on a dating show to appreciate. that about. What would be great would be Love on the Spectrum, Love Island crossover episode? That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Like 50-50? To just throw a couple of grenades Would this be on Epstein's Island or what? This sounds really creepy.

You want to watch and try to figure it out, you know? It's very creepy. It's like traitor or whatever and it's like trying to work out which, but you don't know who's got the diagnosis. Yeah. Love Island on the spectrum and you're trying to work out which one has got which. Once you got people who are that hot, you throw some

autism in there. It's not, you know, mentally, you're in like thin air. You're in thin air. I got to push past it. The liquid death sponsorship's just waiting on the other side. Just hot chicks being like, you're like really funny. You know a lot about weapons. Never knew that about medieval times. Well, I just think also, I mean, it's just, I think that we've got this idea of like rom-coms and then that's what a relationship is, which I don't believe in.

And so, like, to push that on autistic people on the show, because they're looking for some sort of, like, notebook-like thing. I just, it just feels, like, very fraudulent. Yeah. Tell me if this sounds familiar. You train regularly, you eat reasonably well. You feel fine, but you're just kind of going off vibes. Most people have absolutely no idea what's going on inside their body,

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bringing it down to 340 bucks. Get the exact same blood panels that I use and save $25 by going to the link in the description below or heading to functionhealth.com slash modern wisdom. That's functionhealth.com slash modern wisdom. How do you view relationships? Are you no romance or like, how do you think about romanticism, basically? I don't even want to answer that. I don't know.

Like everyone else, I'd like to find a partner. I think it's good. I think it's healthy, yeah. But you're both married with kids. What advice have you got for Jeff on how to find a good woman? How old are you? 43. Should have probably figured it out by now.

Well, behind the power curve, as they said. One of those late blooms. Do you, where do you find, you know, where are you dating? Where do you find your girls? I apparently found one from the comedy scene. Yeah, I mean. And you sent her weird autistic messages already you were saying. I like the way to summarize my life.

Like where Jeff gets arrested for going to kids things? It's just so direct. There's no fat on it when he talks about my life. What, you met a girl in comedy? He sent her autistic text messages. Is that where you're getting them, Jeff? Military precision. You abuse your power in comedy.

Yeah, exactly. Would you find some weakling that you could pick from the pack? So, you know, I usually just meet women on Instagram from, like, after comedy shows and things. That is a thing, apparently, though. What? the girls after the shows. Yeah, or that you meet them at the, like, after, because now you know that they're interested in you

because they saw kind of what you're about up there. They listen to your talk for 70 minutes, and they go, you know, they're interested. And then you can kind of figure it out from there. Usually the comics go somewhere after the clubs and all that stuff. It's not a guy, I wouldn't recommend it. It hasn't worked out for me as far as anything. I've had some, some, I also think you don't get things you don't believe in.

And I've been somewhat skeptical of relationships and romance in general. So maybe that's what. How does the skepticism? of romance and relationship show? What do you mean? I don't know what that means. If you think that they're a sci-op, that Jocco's not actually married or that Matt's like...

No, no, no, no, I think it's fantastic. I think that if you love someone enough, you got to kind of like compromise a lot of stuff. That's what being a man is. You kind of compromise things. You say, hey, I can't go have fun and be drunk guy and I can't be going doing this. And if I'm going to be on the road,

I need to kind of think about how long I'm going to be on the road. Whereas I'm making all the decisions for my career so I can have more money and more friend time and things like that. I've made a lot of selfish decisions that wouldn't... It's like why I don't have a dog. I can't think of anything I like more. But if I was to have a dog right now, I'd be a very selfish dog owner, just letting him be at my house while I'm gone forever.

And so the same thing is just kind of true with relationships. I would love to be with a partner who's awesome, who I love, and I really believe in it. You want a crater. It's just that right now... Well, it's just right now. It's like, I don't know how I'd be a good boyfriend. And I'll figure it out and I'll make sacrifices,

but I haven't found anybody worth making that sacrifice for. That's all. I'm sure someone will come around and I'll be like, holy shit, I'll take this weekend off, let's go to Mexico. I mean, I've done it before. You meet someone you live. Dolphin ride. Yeah, yeah.

The chick that we rode dolphins and I got an ectopic pregnancy with. Yeah. Do you get lonely when you just sit there? Yeah. We're all lonely. I'm super lonely. I don't think that has to do with a single guy. I think we're all.

I got a theory that single guy is after 7 p. in the house go completely fucking insane. Absolutely. Well, you nailed it. There is nothing that single guys in the house can do between the hours of like 7 p.m. and 11 p.m. That isn't fucking weird. Joe Sanagado was telling me one of his friends

got out of a relationship and started sending him headstand videos. Is he doing headstands? Yeah, got into it. It's on YouTube. It's like needy time for bed. Like what are you doing stuff? Why are you upside out? It's really funny.

Guys after 7 p.m. kind of go a bit insane. No, yeah, I think you're right. I think it's a hilarious sentence, but I think it might be something to it. Yeah. If you're not working and you're not going out partying and doing stuff, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, oh, well, I'm not going to start doing, like, emails at this time. I sadly absolutely need a woman to structure my life. Otherwise, it's just, I'm toast.

I can't do it. It's got so angry at this. There was, I've talked about this on the show before, and women got really angry. I think what they thought it sounded like was guys are unable to have hobbies and move themselves forward in life on an evening time if they don't have a woman with them. I think it's completely different to that. I think we are domesticated and civilized by women

and if left to our own devices do insane stuff. Sure. Like that's not, like this is how you get obsessed with, like, crypto or like Warhammer 40K and stuff. You start painting miniatures and collecting wrestling toys. Yeah, which is cool when you have room for in life. But it's not the sort of thing that you're supposed to do until two in the morning because it's like kind of,

taken over you. Yeah. It's like, hey, hey, it's, it's bed time. I still need to be put to bed, seriously. Yes. I need someone to be like bedtime. And I'm like, fine. Thank God.

I'll stay up, I'll stay up by myself. That's what I do every night. I knew I had to be up for a car service at like six, or was six, L.A. time eight o'clock here. And I just watched YouTube. I watched the first episode of Hard Knocks. And I was like, nah, fuck it. I'll just stay away.

I was like, it's kid mentality of like, we could stay up as late as we want. No one can tell me otherwise. It's like I need someone to tell me otherwise. Yeah, but I don't. I'm fine. I feel good. I made my car service. As a man who's famously up at 4.30 a.m. a lot.

Do you need someone to tell you you go to bed? No. I mean, I'm tired at the end of the day. Go to bed. Yeah. Yeah. Not that big of a deal, I guess. Don't say fucking yeah.

You don't go to bed early. Well, I'm saying I do what I want. He's saying he does what he wants. If I want to go to sleep, I will go to sleep. And if I don't, I'll fucking stay up. That's what I don't need a gal to go, hey, honey. No offense. I need that.

No, I need that, man. Civilizing force, too. I would, you know. Civilizing force. Have you ever had any conflict with the British misses around the fucking... No. Because you're a large... It's London time, pretty much.

You're a large man. I imagine that you rolling out of bed. No, she sleeps pretty heavily, you know? And so I just get up and go about my business. Did you imagine how much harder your marriage would have been with you? up at 4.30 a.m. every single day if your wife was a light sleep. Oh, yeah, that would be a bummer. But, you know, what, you're getting up earlier than here?

I don't understand the question. Jocko. Just getting up early with while my wife is still sleeping. So, I get up early. So, Jock famously wakes up at that, that watch has had to, oh, it's a new one. No. Is it the same? Well, it's the same model.

I got about, they, they reproduced them now. So, nice. Because of you? I don't know. Probably. Well, apparently. You must have, how many, how many photos have you watched, do you think you posted? Thousands.

Yeah, yeah, probably. Thousands of photos. and it's always like 4.15 a.m., for fucking 29 a.m. I just picture his wife is as crazy as him, you know. She's up the forehead. She's kind of a beast. Yeah.

What I've noticed is you have to be up. Typically, if you're living with a woman, you should be up before her. Because if they wake up, I've been in a situation where a girl has a job and I don't. Yes. When they wake up for work and you're in bed. Resent you.

Hoof, the huffs and puffs. Yeah. Yeah. They're real loud, slamming shit. Oh, there's vacuuming that needs to get up. Yeah. If you're asleep and they're awake Is there something

Not happening? Going on that? Yeah, they're like, what the fuck? Get up. Why am I up? This guy's protecting me? And you're just like, Oh, this is the one I chose?

You have a pillow between your knees. Yeah, oh, I remember. I'm like fake sleep, but I'm awake, but I'm like, I'm not moving. Laying the eyes closed. The one I picked wearing a Razor Ramon tank top. They're not a fan. You got to get up before him.

Yeah. Yeah, they're putting on, like, dress clothes and you're just, like, farting naked. Yeah, yeah. Hair's crazy. Yeah, they are not fans of that. I think that's what it is about being single that I like is that it's like, you can do anything you want. And that's a very selfish thing to say, that, like, I can just fly to wherever I want or perform.

I can say yes to any gig or thing like that. And I think that, like, a man with a partner doesn't do that. He goes, no, we got this. We need to plan ahead. If I'm going to do a thing, I can't just leave my family for five weeks. Same thing with the dog, same thing. Yeah, it's a little bit selfish, but it's a lot easier. Or not a lot easier, but it's a different type of good.

The grass is greener. What's the weirdest date you've been on since you've been sober? I haven't done any dates, really. Smashing Graves. His words, not much. I actually hope you have no female viewers. Not anymore. Yeah, they're going to go, this guy.

Sucks. No dates. Well, I mean, I guess they are. dates they're just not very formal it's not like we're going to like a thing just eating pussy right no no i guess oh i'll tell you one here's one we went to a movie and dinner that's a date right yeah how was it uh god it was not good you ever had a woman come out to you know you can't go go back to your house and change you know you can't like she came out of her house and i got jesus i'm gonna be walking around with this what was the outfit she it was ridiculous it was it was

it was like uh we were going to a swingers party or something i'm going now I have to, because I dress pretty, you know, cowboy guy, you know, and it was going on. She was scally clad yourself. Very, very revealing clothes, silky, like little, like one-piece dress is a problem for you? No, it's not a problem necessarily if I already loved her or something, but it's a first date. We're, look, we're judging each other, you know? It's kind of a first date, so I'm going, I don't need this, you know? But anyway, she gets in my truck and we go.

And the part that made me think of it is we were watching a movie called Backrooms. Now, I won't spoil it for anybody who hasn't seen Backrooms. it's still in theaters, whatever, but the idea is that, like, you're trying to put together what's happening as the movie's going. So I'm in. I'm all in. I'm like, this movie rules. She keeps talking.

She's like, this guy is. I think he's in this other movie. And I'm like, yeah, yeah, he's in a lot of movies, you know? And she just keeps talking, and I don't want her talking during the movie. It was like I was with my niece or something. And it's just kind of like trying to give her the signals, you know, that I don't like it. After, like, an hour into the movie. I'm liking the movie.

I'm excited. I'm trying to figure where it's going. Also, all my friends saw it, like, the night before. I'm excited to be able to talk about the thing. And then she goes, this movie sucks. Let's leave. And I was like, God damn it. And so we left.

Never got to see the other half of back rooms. People are like, how was it? And I go, I don't know. I saw the beginning and I don't know. But I left because I'm a good guy. Did you pump? Did you? Yeah.

Really? I dropped off. I think it broke her mind. Because women aren't used to offering up themselves in a vulnerable, sexual way with, they're not, they've never had rejection. Men are pretty good at it. We get rejected. we go, yeah, that's what's like to be a guy.

Yeah, you're right, actually. She's, I don't think this, very beautiful woman. I don't, she was like, what? Like, she goes, you don't want to come in? I was, no, thanks. It was nice. Today was great. And then she, I lied.

Tonight was great. And then she's like, well, I can come back to your, and he's like, nah, I gotta get up early, which is not true either. Better go watch the rest of this movie anymore. Turning around and going back to back rooms, yeah. Well, I think it broke her brain. Like, what do you mean? Like, it doesn't go well.

For even, like, whatever the woman looks like, they're 100% of the time when they offer up sex, like there's takers, you know? Yeah. So that kind of rattled her, I think. But also it's like, I'm not... We talked about this last time, like, not being hot to trot. Like, if you're not ready, if you get the big call and you're not ready, whether it's committed relationship or not, it's like a...

There's some fallout. What do you think she'd say if we heard her side of the story? Same thing. I think she said the same thing. Which would be like, yeah, so he comes out, gets out of the truck. Like, I'm dressed up nice and he comes up looking like a total... No, she doesn't try. takes me to see this fucking stupid oldistic movie.

He's like all into this lame movie. No, no. We get back. He thinks he's going to get me. And I'm just like, oh, you can come in if you want. Please say no. Please say no. Thank God, he said.

You want to know what every girl has said about me that's dated me? Because I don't think that girl would say that. This is what 100% of every woman that's ever been around me says. That guy won't shut the fuck up. That's all it is. I'm like, my whole jabbering, yammering existence. I talk a lot. Like, I just, so if someone's with me for longer than a month, they're like, this guy,

me, just talk backrooms on repeat. Yeah, that's my biggest flaw. I can't be quiet. I'm a talk. Well, what, what's your plan with the, is it just never going to happen again? Because you got the pussy on ice right now. What does that mean? You put her on ice.

That's what you, your move, what you did. I will never talk to that check again. That's why I don't mind telling that story. Oh, okay. I'm saying you got. I'm not interested. You have it on ice right now. Yeah, but I could tell after hour one, I was like, this is going nowhere.

That's why why sleep? Good for you. Especially that you're not drinking. anymore because otherwise it might be a little different. Yeah, I know. When I was drinking, like, there was a lot of casual sex. I don't do that now. Oh, really? I don't want to do that. So you're just... Yeah. That's nice.

Yeah, I think it's better. It keeps me more level. Yeah. You start hooking up and then that's like just inviting these, like, kind of social entanglements into your life. Because every, once you sleep with a girl, she's like, oh, I know that guy. You know, like, now they're telling stories. So now it's not cat. Now it's not cat. Yeah, I don't want to do that.

So how do you, what's your threshold for entering sexual? I think if I liked the chick, I would, then I would, yeah. It's casual. No, but I mean, if I'm like, I like, I like, I think I want to date this chick. It's just not, you're not doing it for the sake of doing it. What's the threshold? If she's just into me upright.

If I like her. If she wants to. Is this particularly bad in L.A.? I imagine seeing me, like, parties, people talking, gossipy. I think L.A. and New York are unique in the fashion that, like, everyone is so single for so long. It's more socially acceptable to be single. Yeah. And so then that creates.

all these extra problems. Also, dating is so complicated already while it's ever changing. Yeah. So now dating apps and social media and climbing and do you follow them or do they follow you back? And it's just become, it was already somewhat complex. And now you have like, we've normalized girls talking to a million guys at once and being like, well, I'm not sleeping with them. I'm just kidding. There's just too many things where it's ever changing that it's not fun. And so I think most guys, I'll speak for them, my friends and I, I think they just feel. like defeated. Like, I're not even defeated, just like fatigued. Like, we don't want to deal with this shit.

So I just don't join in the Reindeer games. And then when a girl catches my that I'm interested in, then I will pursue her and I'll ask her out and I'll make those sacrifices. Which I've done recently. There's a girl I kind of like So, yeah, it's been good. Unreal. I... Wait, are you married? No. Okay.

No. We talked about this before the like last chopper out of Saigon. Like, at what point did it feel safe to do, like, dating? And then it doesn't... And you're just like, found the chick fucking 30 years ago everything worked out great

and I didn't need to ever think about it again must be so nice to have just like shelved that part so now I get to focus on everything else including building the family and having the dog and doing the business yeah yeah yeah no this is definitely making me feel like

I made a good decision yeah no you know it's funny this sounds like a horror show adult dating so sometimes like these guys will see me doing like fun things or like I'll have like a wild night or something like that

or at the golf tournament they're like you were with like a babe last night or whatever. And they're like married guys. And I think that in that moment they're going, man, this seems pretty good. I go, yeah, last night my life is way better than yours. Yeah. So there's little moments where I do get to win and you guys have like this, whatever. But trust me, if you found someone you love, you're winning. That's it. The grass is greener over there. I'm lonely on Christmases. I'm on airplanes alone. I'm on stage alone. I'm on green rooms alone. I'm alone a lot. I live alone. I think that there's flashes of.

of like, this is way more excited. I'm on a jet ski, we look at her, blah, blah, blah. But I think that, like, we're all trying to find love, except these autistic kids. And you're doing headstands. Some people are reportedly spending up to $13,000 in an effort to reset their body count to zero. Oh, yeah. A clinic in Brazil is offering Hyman Reconstruction surgery,

with reports claiming many of its patients are women over 30 who want a fresh start before entering a serious relationship or marriage. Jocko, you've got a very different kind of body. count. Would you consider Hyman surgery to reset yours? Well, I'm a man. It doesn't have a hymen. You have a Gaiman.

But you do have a very different kind of body count to the ones that the girls are going to go and do, right? And neither one of them can reset it. There's nothing in the world that we can reset either of those. That's true. That's true. But that's a thing. That's chicks going to Brazil. What a, what a scam. Oh, look. We talk. That's

new chapter. That ought to delete. Justin's contact card out of your phone. There you go. That's it. I mean, 13 grand. Look at that virgin. There she is. She got some flower water poured on her head. And now that means she didn't bang Ricky.

Like, what a dumb thing. This is such a scam. Yeah, that's pretty tough. They don't like, did you ever see the cacao ceremonies people do? They like drink hot chocolate and they're like, whoa, I'm tripping. There's a real thing. It's called cacao ceremonies. They, like, drink a lot of hot chocolate. And they're like, oh, my God, my pineal glance opening up. And they're like...

Well, here's what... How high is your body count that you're flying if you're there? You eat enough cacao. Like, how many dudes did you bang that you needed to go to a ruba or whatever to get someone to pour water on your head? Like, it just kind of suggests that you're a whore just doing this thing. Yeah. Sorry, I got to do a trip. I'm going to, you know, I got to reset my body count.

Like, that's crazy. Yeah. You don't send the car to the mechanic. I need to be exercised. I'm going to Brazil to be exercised. It's insane to me. Ed, I think it's a little, but the cacao thing, the, I've seen them in, like, uh, Kuya, that hot and cold place that's here.

They do these kakao things. I do look at it and sometimes think that's just like a horlicks or like a nesquick, like a hot chocolate. Well, it's probably nice to drink a hot chocolate. Yeah, it's nice drinking and chat with your buddies. What's this? Cacao ceremony? It's just very funny.

Does that not look nice? It's very nice. I want chocolate to just break in there and bite him in the face. Do you watch this and just go, what are we doing? I kind of like drink protein, chocolate protein all of the time. I'm talking about the tens and the broads and the beads on their head. That looks nice. It does look nice.

I'll be honest. This looks dumb as hell. Here's a problem. It's like, that'd be a tough combo the entire time. What word? The hot chocolate? Just hot chocolate talk with adults. Look at all.

This doesn't make you. head? It's whiling me up. It's pissing me off. It makes me laugh. Look at them. I bet they're all in there. Oh, you know.

This is a subsidy. We don't have kids. Who needs kids? Fight the Patriarchate. Look at them. Is that not like you, though? Is that not just the female version of you, but with hot chocolate? No.

That's not me, bro. It's ridiculous. I like the hot chocolate. Don't get me wrong. That's not what I'm judging. Dude, they were converting. Talking with them in a tent sitting cross-legged and going like, hey, next up is a slam poetry.

about race? Like, what are we doing? Yeah, it's a thing, man. Cacao. It's like, that's like the super light psychedelic people go for. They go like, I'll do the cow ceremony if you don't want to do. I feel like I would do that. I wouldn't do the psychedelic thing, but I'd do the cacao ceremony. Yeah, I might do one this afternoon.

It would be nuts. Yeah, sure. We should have brought some. We should have done it. We should have started off with like ceremonial grade cacao. Yeah. He's seen who got fucking. Actually, Hunter Biden on Monday.

Yeah. No, let's get the period cramps. His threshold for anything. He's going to be like whatever. Period cramps while you have some hot cocoa. He got. I've got to try and win the female audience back somehow. You know what I mean?

That's my bad. God damn it. Yeah, man. What, uh, are you still on, are you weeding still? Are you still smoking? Or he's, because you did for a while, right? Yeah, I did for like a really long time. It naturally kind of just fell off, honestly.

So it wasn't a, get arrested, cause of, no, no, no, no, no. I got a question for Matt. Yeah. You're still drinking raw milk straight from the, absolutely. Yeah, dude. Absolutely. Are you, can you get some of weed? Not at all.

That was awesome. When you told me about it, I was like, I got to try this. It rules. The problem is, my commitment to, like, finding this fucking milk was not as committed as yours. It's hard to get. You go to a farmer's market.

I don't even, never been to a farmer's market in my life. That's crazy. Those places piss me off, too. I go and I go, what is all this dog shit? Farmers market rules. No. You need the raw milk.

She said, you need the lab-grown meat. You eat the lab-grown meat in California? I don't want to, but it's pretty easy to get. I'll be there, yeah. What's the sales case for raw milk? You, I have, if I drink regular pasteurized milk, I get congested, I fart. Like, I'm like lactose intolerant.

If I drink raw milk, no problem. You strike me as a raw milk guy. Yeah, we get some raw milk on. It's awesome, you know. The only thing that sucks about is it goes bad really quick. Yeah, you got, you got to get really small bottles. So you get a bottle, just drink it within an hour. Yeah, no, you have, you have like...

It's going bad, honey. You have six days to chug the gallon. I just, we destroy it. Six days is all right. Yeah, that's not bad for a gallon. Kill a gallon of six days. Yeah. But yeah, the weed I slowed down, but it's always there.

I tap it when I need to. It doesn't agree with me at all. I hate weed. It really doesn't agree with that. So why do you hate weed? It just doesn't work for me, one, and then two, I feel like it's a dreamer's nightmare. You know, like all these guys I know are chasing their dreams, and then they smoke weed, and they just don't do anything. They just sit around.

They're already kind of sitting around, and now they're just all sitting around more. I know so many people that smoke weed and do, all kinds of stuff. Well, that's good. I read the world is kind of split into a few groups of people this is a kind of an interesting thing I learned from a dude called edward slingle and you wrote a book about alcohol and one of the reasons that alcohol got spread so wide uh civilizationally is that it's very reliable how it affects people like you drunk is pretty similar to the sensation of me drunk is pretty similar even if your behavior is a bit different the sensation's kind of the same but one person that smokes weed gets horny one person gets sleepy one person gets creative one person gets forgetful and lazy and And it's like the fact that it's so buried means that it's kind of a bit of a shitty drug to do together because everyone's going off and fucking different side quests. Or hard to understand why I would not like it and he would like it.

Why don't you like it? It's terrible when I do it. You don't want to be around me when you... I freak out still a lot, but it's kind of, once you like ride that wave down, I will say I think mushrooms are way better than one. I love mushrooms. Mushrooms rule.

I would say mushrooms are... Big mushrooms. Yeah. You should do mushrooms and run a marathon after this. We should all... That's it. Five more miles. That would be awesome. That would be awesome.

Go rock and roll. Get some cacao and some little thing. Yeah. Let's do it. And all you said are fucking hymonds. That's weird though. The alcohol thing, like I know people that when they get, when they drink, they get, they're crying in the corner about. Yeah.

I know some others just going to fight everybody. Someone else is laughing. Someone else gets super social. Like, that seems a little bit of strange to me to hear that. Yeah. That was his argument. I think the sensation is at least the same for most people. Maybe their behavior changes.

Right. But you are right. I mean, I ran nightclubs for a decade and a half. I saw a million people on the front door of nightclubs, and you see every different version of like inner child demon come back out. We had this pick. This is kind of interesting for anyone that still works in nightlife or in hospitality. If a girl walks into a venue, a late night venue,

usually after 10 or 11 p.m., wearing a jacket of some kind, maybe a denim jacket or a leather jacket, one of those like suit jacket things, and she doesn't have her arms in the sleeves, 70 to 80% chance she's going to get thrown out within the next hour. Like they were always, every single time that they went in, they were the ones that would like swill someone, throw a drink on someone.

It's kind of like the cutoff leather jacket, like sort of smoking kid in the high school. It was just every single time, it became a meme. And we didn't even know why. We just kind of started to select this thing. And we'd be like, do jacket. Something about sleeves. Those hells angels never had sleeves.

Sure enough. Sure enough. Fucking 45 minutes later, she's. throwing a drink over someone. That bitch over there. She's slav. She's that fucking slide. Before you know it, the door staff, like an unwieldy cat.

Like, picked her up like this. Yeah, you have to, as a bouncer, you have to, like, fold women's arms across their chest. No, just crack them on your hip. Just got to strike first, dude. Slap him with the period cramp simulator. Yeah, yeah. Disabled stuff. That's easy.

Uperc. Yeah, well, the bell curve for alcohol probably is. There's probably is it. There's outliers, but there probably is way more of just people. It's a good way to put it. Yeah. I think that's true. We need in a crowd of people who are all high is, like, 50% of people are dipping off stuff.

It's not really a good crowd thing. I'd like to know who runs PR for marijuana. Because, like, when I say I don't want to do drugs anymore, and people are like, oh, he must have a problem. Or I don't want to drink the guy. Who cares? The second I push back against marijuana, everyone's like, dude, what are you talking to me? You just got to try a different strand and, like, well, what happened?

And how many times have you tried? I'm like, good. I just don't want to fucking do it, dude. Yeah. It's not good. And then everyone just keeps pushing it on me. It is resilient. Alcohol is the same, though.

Everyone who drinks is like, come on, man, have a drink. Well, they want to drink with you. They want your company. Yeah. It's the only drug where if you don't do it, people assume you have a problem. Yeah. Hey, dude, why are you not shooting up track tonight? Come on, just do a little.

Yeah. It's a Tuesday. Just do a little heroin. I've heard that people who start shooting heroin, there is a big thing where they're trying to get other people to start shooting heroin too, because then they get to be the guy who gets you heroin. Yeah. Now they're like a middleman so they can do free heroin.

But they're bad salesman because they're all like hunched over. And you're like, I can't trust me. I used to work with this guy and he had just, he would just be sweating all. He was shooting heroin all the time. He could be like me. Sweating all the time. He'd be like, dude, honestly, if you shot one bag, you'd be partying. And I'm like, dude, it was, he was living in this like pretty fucked up thing.

And his like girlfriend was there just on a mattress when you walk in. And he just be like, he was like kind of tricking her out too. And it was just kind of like, I think I'm all right. I think I'm a steer clear of joining your son. The man of the people. Have you ever heard? Hunter Biden talk about crack. Yeah, I saw that.

It has sent you the clip earlier on today. What is that? It is just the best ad read for crack I've ever heard in my entire life. He makes crack sound fucking awesome. There's a comic named Jimmy, who is one of my favorite people in Cleveland. He's the best, and he said he did crack one time. Because he does all the drugs, and then one night he's just on one. So he's like, I'll try.

I bought it from like a homeless guy. And he said it felt so good that he started to walk to his bank account, like, I'm going to take all. all of my money and just get as much of this. Yeah. The first time he ever did it. But he passed out on the way to like the ATM and just slept like on the street like he goes, but I'm just telling you the sensation that I felt was the greatest thing I've, I've ever felt in my life.

And that's how addicted to it. One of my neighbor's nephews, he was a meth head and ended up going to jail and he did seven years in jail. And when he got out, he was just talking to me about. And he said he tried meth for the first time. He goes, as soon as I tried it, it was the only thing I ever wanted to do for the rest of my life. It's crazy. He burned like every bridge in, you know, in his neighborhood and his whole family and then the next city and then he ended up going all over America until he eventually got busted in Texas.

That's crazy. Yeah. Down in a wild. It's pretty powerful. Weird keyhole in the back of some people's brains or systems or whatever. And just the right drug just like fucking explosion. Like the rest of your life just falls apart. Yeah.

That's how opioids are for some people. I remember I tried like porcocets and stuff and was like, yeah. Like a painkiller? Yeah, it was like, not really for me. I was like, I don't understand these things.

I know people would try them. It was, that was it. They were just like, this is it, yeah. This, uh, 7-oh-H stuff.

Yeah. Is seven hydroxy-tragene, something. I watched Hamilton Morris, the dude that used to do the vice documentaries about drugs. He did this breakdown of, of what was going on with it.

It's been used to get people off opiates, but it's, they're also sold in gummy bears, a gas station. It's cratom. It's cratom based, yeah. It's like,

pressed crate. It's like Kratum's Kratum. You know, like Trank is fentanyl's fentanyl. It's this but legal. And the fucking shell garage on South Lamar has just got stacks and stacks and so there's Kratem and then there's the 708 bills

and then there's Dickville. Will it impair you if you drive? Like is it, I don't understand how to turn. 13 times I think more stronger than morphine. Like you're selling it at the 711? Yep. And it's like perks. It's like PR KS. I think there are

legal now. I think they're making them illegal. They're trying to right now. They're like apparently, I think they're, I swear to God, like 10. It's maybe even today that they're trying to pass the. Vap shops are crushed between the THC or, what is it, Delta 8, THC. Now if you get caught with Delta 8 in Texas, you go to jail for like five years. What's that a strong form of THC? Not even, but it's like the synthetic THC stuff that they're selling in vape shops.

And now all that stuff's like super illegal in Texas. Like a vape cartridge. I think a vape cartridge was like five years. What they kept on doing was basically adding some new molecule. We're going to change this one bond and this one bond. And it doesn't affect anything to do with how your body interacts with it. Delta 9, dollar 10, delta 11. You just keep on running away.

And the legislation can't catch up quickly enough. What's going on with this world? It was the farm bill. The farm bill said, farm bill that people, you could grow CBD basically, which hemp is weed, of the same things.

It's just like you can kind of, you know, curate it to have different cannabinoids. So you can grow weed with THC, that's weed. If you grow weed with CBD, it's hemp. It's like, you know, it's the same exact plant. But then you can do the thing where if you take every CBD plant has like 0.3% THC, but if you grow a whole field of it, you could isolate all that THC and get like thousands of grams of pure TACC. And that was technically legal to then make drinks with.

So then they did a thing where you could have weed with THCA, which is just regular weed. When you heat THC, it turns into THC. That's like when you decarboxulate weed to make brownies or whatever. You have to heat it up and the carbon molecule or whatever. And so they were just selling THCA wheat. It was just weed legally for like three years. Due to the hemp farm bill, that was federally legal. That's why.

Weed was legal for four years, basically. And then they just, I think they're repealed this. Have you been to Amsterdam and had the, so they've got mushrooms, which is what grows above ground, and then truffles, which is the root system. And it's just the same thing. But they legislated what was above ground. Right. And hey, if you eat

I like those kind of rules. Yeah. It's not the top part, pal. Yeah. It's very important. The funny thing, with the farm bill, it became that the U.S. Department of Agriculture was overlooking weed grows for like four years. So you could literally grow weed and a guy from the U.S. Department of Agriculture would be like, yeah, it looks good.

There was no, it wasn't, it should have like the DEA, so unregulated. It was weed was unregulated for like four years. Some guy that knows fertilizer and crop rotation. Combine harvest is very nice. Yeah. I had to take a selfie just to watch porn last night. Oh, you did it? Oh, because you're in Texas.

Yeah, Texas guy. You got to have proof you're an adult. No. Yeah, I did it. Well, like, on your phone or something? Took a selfie, yeah. Take a selfie, yeah. No, I did.

I'm in some database now where they go. Damn. But the selfie, he goes, oh, he's old enough. Because that's not the case in Calvin. That's a real thing. I'm not making that up. Your political enemies are going to use that. You're in the fucking. What, I looked at porn.

Sorry. Sorry, guys. Then I looked at porn. You're in the DNC database. I guess I'm a terrible guy. I did do it on the 20th floor with all over 15 days straight. You might look at some porn.

Sorry, guys. You're in Texas for 15 days? No, I was just saying, I was alone for 15 days. I see. Yeah. What are you doing in town? What else is going on? I've got mothership shows all weekend.

Unreal. But then I just been doing shooting guns and hanging out with friends. Dropping into Jocco's world? That's it. Can you tell that story about the huge fuck-off sniper rifle thing that was so funny.

So somebody made a sniper rifle to see if this was a good idea. And I want to see it was either 20 millimeter or 25, but I think it was a 25 millimeter sniper rifle. And they brought it up to our sniper school. And they wanted to see if this, like, it was a viable idea. So 25 millimeter is massive. This is a massive freaking bullet. And this, they start giving it to the students to see if they can hit anything.

Well, you're like a bracing. for that thing to go off and no one could shoot it properly. And, you know, guy might hit the target one time and then they're just so petrified to pull the trigger again. They'd miss. And they would just be like,

hey, I'm not shooting this anymore. And so I have a buddy who was the senior guy that was in charge of the sniper school who is one hard, hard individual and little crazy. And no one could make this gun work. And then finally he's like, all right, give it to me. And he sat down and just, like,

gritted his teeth and just, cracked off a round, hit the target, just sucked it up, cracked off another round, hit the target again, cracked off three, that's like a normal three-round group puts it all on target. And the people that had manufactured this weapon, like, oh my gosh, it's a viable option. And he just got up was like, do not make this weapon. It was just so crazy. But a testament to that dude who is like just a hard, crazy dude. I'm like that guy.

Yeah. He's like one of the guys we were talking about earlier. Like, yeah, you know, he would need an outlet. let you know what I mean but that's exactly who you want war like somebody that'd be like oh you want no one can do this cool watch this I'll do it I'll take whatever concussive impact there is to shooting this thing I'll do it what is it that's happening if you fire a gun that's that big is it just the shockwave is it the fact that it's hitting you in the body like what was the yeah the worst thing is the shockwave that concussive wave that you're going to get over your head you know is going

to be this can be gnarly it's a real thing like just sickness disorienting little like micro It's like getting cracked in the head. Like when you spar and you get somebody cracks you and you're like, oh, you see a little white flash. And you can still power through it like he did. And then you take another, you know, crack to the head. And you're like, okay, I can power through it. It's cracking you to the head. Yeah, you're cracking the trigger of this thing.

And then the next day you're like, wow, I wonder why I have this headache. Oh, yeah. I can't remember the last day. Exactly. Is that not, you know, when guys have got huge cannons and they're like in World War II and stuff like that would not have been that time? Oh, totally. Totally. Totally.

Would it affect a dolphin's brain the same as it would affect the- Possibly. Possibly. I don't know. Depends on who's riding the thing's back. Fucking swimming around and going to shock is what hurts the worst. After picking minds off the straight of her muse, yeah, probably. I always think about seeing World War II shit

when the guys are just loading huge shells in and then they've got a bathroom light switch pole. Boom! They didn't even wear hearing protection either. They didn't wear hearing protection, they just got some. Yeah. I thought about that today when I was shooting just about how much my grandpa would have loved

just the technology that was in the scope. The scope alone, I was like, this is, I mean, I'm nailing it because the scope is so accurate and whatever. It's like, they didn't have any of that, you know, they're chasing away. Just shooting stuff. What's the truth around, there's these rumors, I don't know whether it was World War II or Vietnam or whatever, the number of soldiers that never fired their weapon directly at the enemy? Yeah.

Does that ever get debunked or whatever? Yeah, it got debunked. So there's a guy named SLA Marshall who wrote this book and wrote these theories about how, and he went around and interviewed soldiers and it turns out, you know, it wasn't true. You know, like, he used it and it's kind of, he had the hypothesis going into it, but it wasn't true.

And the theory was that maybe people on one side of the battle were not prepared to try and fire that weapon. The theory was like, it's such an abhorrent thing for humans to, like, shoot a weapon at other humans that they just would get to that point and they'd go, I can't do it. And, you know, the number was like 10% of, only 10% of the troops

involved in direct combat would actually engage the enemy. And so that's when they started using man-shaped silhouettes to shoot at for targets and even putting like pictures. So you get, oh, they're going to condition these guys to be able to shoot, you know, at man-shaped targets because they said they needed that kind of conditioning. But again, the guy SLA Marshall, he was, you know, he was like a reservist. And he was a, he was a journalist in his regular life. So it was kind of him, you know, hyping up a story and sensationalism.

Yeah, sensationalism. Also, pretty nuts to explain like World War. two casualty numbers. Yeah, it was just 10% of the guys. Yeah. Oh, yeah, imagine if everybody else had decided to fire the weapons would just be no one left. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that's pretty nuts. Yeah, and he kind of, he also made some stories up about how much he had been in combat in World War I. So it was the whole thing. And he had a lot of clout inside the military. You know, he had a lot of clout from that, you know, he wrote that theory. He wrote another theory about how much weight guys can carry.

That was a little bit more realistic. But yeah, so it's a little bit debunked. What happens to guys like that? Is he on like a list right now or is like people want to kill that guy? You know, when someone starts publishing shit and making things up, it must piss you off. Yeah, I think it pisses everyone off. Yeah, that's my point. That's kind of the rule is.

Broves the code. Yeah. Like, hey, don't try and make yourself into something that you weren't, you know? And generally speaking, it's like, oh, if you're in the military, good job. Thank you for your service. You know, there's a whole spectrum of things that you could do. Everyone from being a supply clerk to somebody that's on the front lines, you know, get in direct combat. And it's like, yeah, everyone.

did their part, thank you for doing your part, where people get into trouble is when they make it out to seem as if they did more than they actually did. Yeah. So one time I was at top golf and my friend Josh Nelson for a $6 discount, they go, are you a veteran or a senior citizen or whatever? Stolen valor? He said I was, he said that he was a veteran and he got six bucks off. Yeah, I'm coming for you. What's his name, Jeff Johnson? Josh Nelson. Josh Nelson? Really? 25 millimeter rifle. Yeah, dude.

six bucks Josh was it worth it he's probably getting the Chili the the the the uh Chili's discount everything yeah well she just goes are you a senior citizen or a veteran or uh whatever the third thing was and he goes yes you know so maybe he was stealing valet from the old people or the students but i took it as a as an insult to my man here so Josh what are the what are the best privileges that veteran privileges that you guys hear that you can uh active military gets on the plane first. That seems pretty fucking cool. Not even first, though. I think concierge key gets on before the military.

I swear to God, I don't think they're first. We can only get concierge key if you're a veteran. I don't think so. I don't know what that is. What is that? I don't know. Some like super sky mouse. Because I remember, I could be wrong, but I'm almost positive. It's not military first.

It's like, I swear to God, it's like Sky Club or something. It's some bullshit. I sort of God. If you have a Seahawks, I could be wrong. But I'm, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think you're wrong. I think active duty military goes first. Okay.

I think that is who goes first. They go right after the pre-boarding. Oh, okay. And then it's like the- Disabled people, people that need wheelchairs and assistants. And then- Right, right, right. Oh, here we go.

What order does the military get let on in planes? Depends on the airlines. There we go. Passengers needing extra assistance, active duty. Yeah. Why would wheelchairs be before active military? Because you got to take so long. Yeah, but fuck them.

Not better than, what are we talking about? There's already sitting. relaxed. Very judgmental for the people that have got disabilities today. What else do you get? What else? Quite frankly, one of the best benefits that you get from the military is the VA loan. So you get a loan to buy a house and it's no money down. So that's pretty awesome.

Yeah. How does that work? You just, you know, you get a VA loan. So if you were going to buy a, VA, sorry. Veterans Administration.

So if you're going to buy a $300,000 house, instead of having to come up with whatever 10% or 20% to put down on that, you can just get a VA loan. It's all, you can borrow all that money. Cool. So, yeah.

Pay back whenever you want. It makes that first, well, not whenever you want, you'll have a mortgage. But the loan bit, right? Yeah, the loan. It's just a normal mortgage. But yeah, that's a cool thing. Yeah, there's a bunch of good benefits, you know, the health benefits that you get for the rest of your life, which, you know, people have different experiences with the VA. There's, there's, it's somewhat socialized medicine, which, as you know, being from England is not always the best thing.

But since it is America and we try and take care of our veterans, some people, depending, it's, a lot of it's like, almost like a franchise, you know, you go to some. franchise and it's pretty good to go and you go to another franchise and it's not. So there's some of that with the VA where depending on where you are and what the VA is like in your city or in your town, it can be pretty good or it can be pretty bad. So there's, you know, obviously, that's a great thing, the health benefits that you get from it. Um, you get, you know, money for college if you want to go to college or you can pass it on to your kids if you want to do that. So, yeah, there's a bunch of good, I mean, there's a bunch of really good benefits from being in the military. And obviously, I love being in the military. So.

I'll say all kinds of good stuff about it. The UK, the biggest difference that I've seen from going UK to US from the military side is how much reverence there is for veterans. Like, it's almost, to be honest, kind of looked down on a little in the UK. Really? Yeah. I mean, maybe not if you went to Sandhurst and did the officer thing in the track, but it's just seen as you didn't choose to have a more refined.

It's very, it feels very icky. Like it doesn't feel like the same kind of, pedestalization, like upholding the sanctity of protecting the country and doing the thing. That's kind of crazy, considering the proud tradition of the British military. There is no getting on the plane first. I mean, maybe you get a discount in Nando's for 10% or something, but top golf, really? Top golf, UK. I just, it's not got the same. I mean, and I was wearing some black rifle coffee t-shirt a couple of years ago, and they just that tri-blend military green thing. And I think on all of their t-shirts, they've got the flag on the arm.

And it's got a Reaper on the front of it. And some older guy on a plane that was sat toward the front. So I walked past. So I'm being sort of shunted along. I mean, with the cabin class going toward the back. I can't slow down. And he goes, thank you for your service. And I'm like, no, it's not.

I'm really, I'm English. And I didn't, wasn't a bot. And I'm like, you know, like, I stole valor like passively. Or like, he threw valor at me. He sort of threw valor at me, which I think is different. And I'm like, I can't put this down. I'm like trying to bat it away. Dude, if I serve food in the military and someone even hint it towards me being in combat,

I'd be like, I don't talk about it. I know this about myself. I know this about myself. I would have 100% do that. And I hate that about myself, but I would definitely do that. I don't like. I wouldn't say anything. I would be like, uh, guys like these, you know what I'm saying?

I'm just being honest. I'm just being honest. If someone were to give me credit like that, I wouldn't be like, well, actually, I'd be like, well, you know, we all played on part. It's actually real. I'll talk to guys or guys will ask me. Guys that were in the military, like before September 11th, after Vietnam before September 11th, they did whatever, 1994 to 1999. And they feel so bad and so guilty that they didn't serve in combat.

And, you know, I was telling him, hey, you did what your country needed you to do at the time, you know? Like, thank you for your service. And that's, but guys do feel guilty about that. What was happening then from a military perspective? Nothing really. Yeah. I mean, I was in the entire 90s and we didn't do barely anything. We did like shipboardings are over in the Persian Gulf.

people that were smuggling whatever stuff in and out of Iraq. So we did shipboarding over there to get control those vessels. But that was pretty much like the real missions that we were doing at the time. And it was just not that big of a deal. So what happens when 2001 comes along? Like what did that feel like to go from seeing this period of relative, I mean, as peaceful as the fucking military with guns can be, I suppose. Very peaceful.

And then there is a very large or two very large pistols that get set off. Yeah, no. It was totally different. Yeah, total game changer for everybody. Yeah, overnight. What was waking up mid-September like? Well, we just knew. I mean, everybody knew that we were going to war.

Now, if you were to ask me at the time, you're going to be at war for two decades? I wouldn't have thought that. We all thought that much like some of the other sort of operations that had taken place, whether it's Panama or Grenada, something like that, these things lasted a few days. Even the first Gulf War, over in 72 hours. I was, so I was...

the Navy had sent me to college at the time, so I was in college, and I was all distraught because I thought I was going to miss this war. You know, I want to be a command of my whole life. You know, there's nothing going on in the 90s when I'm in. I know that we're all going to war, and it's probably going to be over very shortly,

and I'm not going to be a part of it. So I actually called the guy that was in charge of assigning us to whatever SEAL team you're going to go to. And I said, hey, sir, you know, please get me out of here, send me back to a SEAL team. I'll finish college later. And he said, hey, this is going to last a long time.

And I didn't believe him. He goes, this is going to last a really long time. And I was like, no, it's not. He goes, finish college and I'll get you to a team. And sure enough, I mean, he got me to a team a little while later. And sure enough, he got me to a team that was deploying next. Luckily, thankfully, to Iraq. But even my first deployment to Iraq, I thought, oh, this is going to be over, you know, we'll be.

I'm so lucky I get to be here and do my job for six months right now because it's probably going to be over. Then probably that was 2003, 2004. Now we get into 2005. You start saying, oh, this is going to be. on for a long time. And then, you know, it lasted for two decades. When did you realize that it was going to be more than just a couple of years? I would say the middle of 2005. That's when the news, you started really hearing the shift in the news that they were saying that this is an insurgency now,

you know, as opposed to just a regime, hey, we're going to take out the regime and walk away, which we could have done. But instead, now we're going to stay there. We're going to try and turn them into, you know, a democratic country. It's like, okay, that might not be a great idea. okay and now you start to have the insurgency which is al-Qaeda leadership starts coming in from other countries and they're starting to run and direct and finance operations inside Iraq and the local populace again you know there's so many complexities of this but you know the the the shias are the majority people there and it's been run by the Sunnis for a long time so it doesn't take much to sort of spark a spark friction between those two elements because they already have bad blood between each other other. And of course, Al-Qaeda doesn't want America to have any success over there. So they do their

best to spark that conflict between the Sunnis and the Shias. It's a disaster. Yeah. Well, 9-11 is maybe second only to the atomic bombs is like very small period of time that just totally changed the course of the future. Yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure. And I would say even the atomic bombs were less because that was, you know, the direction that we were going. in, we were going in that direction. If we didn't have atomic bombs that time, we would have landed on Mainland Japan. We would have been a costly victory, but we were going to win.

So I would say that, yeah, 9-11 was even more of a radical change. Such a left turn. Yeah, such a left turn. Were you more Sunni or Shia? So it depends on how you look at it. The Sunnis and the Shias, you know, it's one of those scenarios where we worked alongside the Sunnis, but the Shias made up the vast majority of

of the army of the of the of the Iraqi army so you kind of had to you know you kind of had to do both you kind of had to get along with both of them reasonable yeah yeah both guy yeah you kind of got to get along with both it's fucking crazy I mean it's 25th anniversary is in a month yeah what for 9-11 I don't know it's called an anniversary of so the tragedy what would you call it birthday memorial maybe maybe memorial just call it 25 like 250 yeah all you're Yeah, like America's 50. Yeah, Memorial, I guess. Make 25 merge.

I remember before I moved out here, it was the back end of 21, and I was watching these awesome documentaries. Netflix did just the archive footage, even though you've got such a constrained amount, they keep on finding or being able to remaster or make stuff a little bit better. And this is, as I'm sort of dreaming of coming out to America. And when you're anywhere that hasn't been involved in living in Manhattan, thinking about it, it almost feels unreal. It's like watching somebody play a video game. Right. Kind of.

Yeah. And because it's such an insane city and the density's so high. And then obviously the incident's just like so crazy. And now that I've spent time, lots of time in New York and I fucking love Manhattan, I think it's so cool. Thinking about that thing happening. Like that actually happened in a city that I've spent tons of time in that I've walked around Freedom Tower. I've seen, you know, ground zero, all that stuff. that must have just been for the people that were there

that must have been like one of the most across all of human history what other days have been more insane to have seen something like that happen so crazy yeah seeing a plane crash into a fucking building too yeah that's crazy yeah I mean obviously Pearl Harbor was a huge

was a huge impact as well but again that we are leaning in that direction anyways you know it was like there's a lot of isolation in America, obviously, during that time. But, you know, there was also people that were like, hey, we got to do something. And that, that tipped the scales. But, yeah, 9-11 was just, you know,

we were all just carrying on with normal stuff. And then boom. It's a shocking incident at Pearl Harbor and with the atomic bombs, but not a shocking trajectory. This is a total just, like, off-road, left-turned thing. So, yeah, it's wild. That being said, it's so fascinating to see now,

in retrospect what that did. It changed travel. It changed the entire sort of geopolitical landscape. Yeah. I wonder how different the world would be if that hadn't happened. It would be like literally a different fucking universe. Different universe, yeah.

I mean, my life, obviously, everybody that I know would, you know, who knows what our lives would be like. You're just still being in college. Maybe. Still knows. And his doctor. Just keep.

Do you guys know anyone that was there in Manhattan? during the only story i've heard is that uh you know louis j gomez comedian he rollerbladed away he was on rollerblades and he rollerbladed like away from new york city faster than he's ever rollerbladed yeah it's a true story apparently he like he wasn't like at ground zero but he was there when it got enough to wheelies could have helped wheelies could have helped well he had rollerbladed he apparently rollerbladed like super far was like ah and his rollerbladed away out of louis gomez speed skating away from it so i like i like the idea i did the favorite stories.

Talk about PTSD. You know, it's like the big, biggest day in history and you get caught on rollerblades. It's like a bad dream. Nightmare. Where were you in a half? I don't know. Just roller glading around.

You know, having knee pads on and elbow pads and a helmet. Wrist cards. Yeah. Oh, you are safe. You know, Michael Jackson was supposed to have a meeting on the top of one of the Twin Towers on 9-11, but he slept in.

Can we confirm this? Chat, GPT. This sounds like some bullshit, Michael Jackson's team would say. Let me give you an even better one. Let me give you an even fucking. The boy that was never there. Seth MacFarlane, guy that started family guy, was supposed to get on a flight on the morning of 9-11,

and his assistant missed book the time on his schedule. He arrived at the airport, but missed the plane. To the plane left, that was the plane that hit the South Tower. Really? Yeah. So he bought his assistant, Rolls-Royce, as a thank you for having gotten him late. It might be born at the very only. Michael Jackson was definitely in New York City.

The answer is possibly, but not definitely established. His brother said in his memoir And in interviews, Michael was scheduled to attend meetings at the World Trade Center that morning but overslept. That looks good enough for me. No, we'll get into it too. Yeah, wasn't he hooked up to like propanol or something? That day?

Probably. I think he would use it. What's propanol? He used to, like, hook him up to like a sleeping drug. He was like IV. Pretty sure propanols, uh, oh, is that beta blockers? Well, maybe, that's propanol. And maybe propanol is what you used for general anesthetics.

Yeah, he would do anesthesia every night to go to bed. Fuck. Is that why he looked like that? My sister was in Manhattan on September 11th. And we didn't hear from her for a couple days. I mean, I wasn't, like, super worried about her because she didn't work in the trade centers or anything. But there was a couple days where there was not good communications coming in out of there

because of all the traffic over the old school cell phone towers and all that. Do you hear about the insurance? There's, like, the occurrence debacle with the World Trade Center. So it's like the guy who owned them, he was taking out a 99-year lease. And it was like their insurance thing. It said, like, in the event of an occurrence, like a disaster. occurrence, you were to get, you know, $3.8 billion. He was like, since it was two planes, it's two occurrences, I should get like,

double. Yeah, pretty much like $7 billion. And he had to find some of the insurance companies actually had to pay double. And then another one just was like, no, we're not doing that. But he went for double. He's like, it was technically two planes. So it was one word in a contract that cost billions of dollars. Well, I mean, what are the odds?

Yeah, I mean, shit, yeah. And that's what you get insurance for. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Fuck me. I mean, that stuff, all of the stuff around COVID, Bill Ackman, you know, Bill Ackman, the guy that made the short selling bet against Herbalife. So he's a trader, but he trades against companies as opposed to for them. And short sellers are usually pretty disliked inside of the market because you're actively going after market value. You're betting against something. So you're trying to take him down. You're finding out shit to do with their executives or the financials aren't right or the formulation doesn't work or something as opposed to, hey, positive some, I'll just bet on the market going up and to the right. And during he put a special kind of insurance on early. So he sort of put this bet that the whole market was going to go to shit. You know, the big short that was Michael Burry's thing and they made the documentary, a movie about it. Bill Ackman made more money than the big short in six weeks

with this one bet. It's like called the new big short. The problem is the reason I think it's not being dramatized is there's not that much drama. It's just one guy who's got a good bit of vision going, I think this is going to fucking word. Pressing a butt, pressing a button. There's no narrative, right? There's no story unfolding and all the rest of it. But, I mean, the fucking financial crisis. Like how much would 9-11 have played into that?

It's fucking crackings, dude. It's also wild with the financial crisis that's so few people, of all these people that are sitting around in New York, in those big buildings, trying to figure out what's going to happen. And there's like six or seven guys that are going to, well, here's a good bet. You guys were all making a bad move. the newspapers and the buildup to the Great Depression,

I think in the couple of weeks, or you can do a sentiment analysis on all of the headlines. Not a single person is predicting it. It comes out of absolute no way. It's going to be a boon. 1929 is going to be even better. And people just don't see it. So there is a long,

an illustrious history of people not being able to predict what the fuck is going to go on with finances. Yeah. And by the way, that's just true. in life. You know, I always bring that stuff with like war in combat. People, oh, this is going to happen, that's going to happen. You don't know. You know what's going to happen. So don't put all your money on the table on one bet because it's not a good move unless maybe you're Bill Ackman. Yeah. How do you, it seems like there's sort of two things that you're trying to do at once there.

One is have as much control and prediction as possible in the micro, but it sounds like you're just totally hands on. It's like this war can go on for as long as it does. We have no idea how the rest of the country and the geopolitics and the governments are going to interact with each other. Is that difficult? Well, to me, it's not that difficult. It's not that difficult to look at any situation and say, oh, yeah, I'm not exactly sure what's going to happen. And this is a mistake that America's made many times, which is, oh, we're, this is what's

going to happen. You know, we know what's going to happen. You don't know what's going to happen. No one knows what's going to happen. It's like getting in a fight, right? You go, you walk up, you're walking down the street. You see some guy that's, whatever, skinny and weak looking and possibly drunk. And you're like, oh, I'm going to kick this guy's ass.

what happens? He pulls out a knife, you know, you stumble. Like, there's, there's, there's, things that can happen that you cannot predict, even when you're bigger, stronger. And if you have that attitude, lack of humility, then you're going to make mistakes. So, you know, all these things that go on in the world when people start, start explaining exactly how it's going to happen. I'm like, you do not know what's going to happen. You don't understand human will. Like, how do you know what someone else is willing to go through? You have no idea. Just like you can't look at a guy that's going to through seal training and say, oh, that guy's going to make and that guy's not. No, you have no idea. So you look at a whole country and you're going to say, oh, this is how

they're going to behave. You have no idea how they're going to behave. And you don't really understand their culture. And even if you did understand their culture from your college that you went to in New York, you don't understand what it's like on the ground. So we make a lot of moves that we shouldn't be making just because we think we can predict things that we can't predict. Yeah, I saw a lot of that in the Iran stuff where you'd have a professor. I've been studying unilateral by proxy warfare for 30 years. My analysis, and you're like, dude, Shut up. Shut up.

You have no idea. You do not. It is, it's got to be hard to be someone who's supposed to make predictions because you, there's so many ways that it can go wrong in literally only one way that it can go right. Yeah. Like all of the different ways that the future could unfold. I'm pinning my colors to the mast of this one. Yeah.

And every single other bet that could happen for reasons that I do or don't know about, I'm just fucked. Dude, I read a book called The Next Hundred Years. I don't know if I talked about this before, by George Friedman. And he wrote it, I think, like, I would say the early 2000s, maybe like 2010 or whatever. But he, I remember I only read half, but he was pretty, he predicted our Russia-Ukraine conflict back then, almost to like the T. It was pretty, I don't know. I have to look it up.

But it was definitely written maybe like 10 years before the Russia-Ukraine thing happened. Did he say why he thought he was going to? He was just saying they have to, like, it's an adventure. Like, Russia needs that area to secure their borders are so weak because, like, their borders are so weak. Like from Ukraine, it's just you're right there to the major cities. They're going to have to do that eventually. How much is that, that Russia-Ukraine conflict, I'm aware? You're not an active participant in the way that you used to be,

but is that changed the sort of landscape of how people think about warfare tactically? Totally. I mean, 100%. The drones is a totally new world. That's a totally new world. And it's very interesting just how fast they make changes and adjust to the technology and the tactics as well has been incredible to see. So it's full, like, capitalism warfare,

meaning that the faster you can adapt and do things a different way in a new way that's successful and put more resources behind that, that's what they're doing and they're doing it very rapidly. That's what's keeping the Ukrainians in the game is that they're just,

like I read an article about there was an element, there's these drone elements, right, drone units of Ukrainians. And they basically say, Hey, here's how we're keeping score. Go do as much damage as you can. Whoever does the most damage out of these,

I don't know what the numbers, but four or five, let's say four or five platoons of drone operators. Okay, whoever gets the most action or destroys the most Russian, we're going to give you more money. And that's exactly what they did. They're gamified it.

And so they're going, okay, well, what can we do? How can we make this work? And they're just figuring out a way to win and they're doing it very rapidly. This is what America's not good at, right? This is why Anderil, companies like Anderil,

who are just going to make stuff and do it very rapidly are going to end up being much more valuable than the old traditional unless Raytheon and those other big ones make adjustments

they're not going to be able to keep up with a company like Andrel because capitalism on the battlefield is a really important thing the way things are moving so quickly. Capitalism warfare is so fucking cool. It does sound fucking sick.

What are the changes? So it's mostly drones? Oh yeah, it's drones. The drones are totally, totally different. Yeah. I mean, you guys all watch the videos. I'm sure you guys, you know, stay up at night watching videos of these things going on. Doing head sound.

But like one of the most interesting things, if you're tracking this, you know, the original drones were all controlled by radio, right? Radio frequencies and those things are getting blocked and jammed. And so all these new drones are controlled by, by, by, you know, filament, fiber optics. And they can go, they have fiber optics. that are 60 kilometers long. What? And so you got this, it looks like a little tube on the, and there's a whole thing in there wrapped with the filament.

And they fly these things 60 kilometers. And the whole battlefield over there is now draped with this filament, this fiber optic filament. It's like spider webs. But, you know, this is what they're doing. This is how fast- What about stuff you're not allowed to do, like biological warfare or like weaving the shock things

we're talking about. I see things where people were like, dude, we were in a crowd and then they just hit us with this thing that you're not supposed to do but like,

Venezuela. Yeah, but what about the Venezuela riot and the fucking energy weapon? Jared, this is crazy.

Yeah, that was wild. What is it called? Like, is there's some sort of like term for it where they can like make noise, like shoot noise. Like a sonic.

Like a sonic sonic weapon of some kind. But like what about all that shit? Like that way we gotta be ahead of the curve and the thing is there'll be a counter for that. stuff just like they're you know if they're going to figure out how to counter these filament drums like

their technology will yeah do will find a way to defend itself and they'll make another adjustment to that and they'll just keep doing that so it's be much more the the pace of technological advancement is what will what we'll what we'll see now in the in the wars from here on out you know in iraq when i was in iraq like the insurgents would figure out how to put a bomb in the road and then we'd figure out how to build armor and then they'd figure out how to build armor and then they'd figure out build a bigger bomb. And then when we started jamming, you know, they were detonating them with with walkie-talkies and so we figured out how to jam them and then they figured out how to put like pressure plates in the road. So it's just a technological race. But those those cycles would take

months, you know, four months, three months, six months, but these things are just happening much more rapidly. Yeah, the bio weapon shit scares me, man. That's like the, I watched the interview with RFK Jr. on CNN. Did you see that? Yep. Him and I forget the lady's name. They were going at it. It was actually pretty cool to watch. But the, At one point, I could be wrong, but I could have sworn she was like, well, what are you going to do? The experts say there will be another pandemic in 10 years. And she almost said it like, it's happening. What do you?

And it was just like, well, how the fuck do you know? Why are you saying? It was almost like, it sounded like she was very certain being like, oh, it's going to happen. She thinks she's the Simpsons calling a shot. This is kind of like, first of all, why, it's weird to be like, oh, there definitely will be another pandemic. Well, they used to, like, hit and stuff. He used to play with bugs and, like, literally, like, you do break rules of war. Like you're not allowed to like put diseases in bugs and then release bugs into a field and go,

it'll get them. Like there's rules or there's supposed to be rules. And that's a long time ago. So I can't I can't rule out that there must not be people trying to figure this stuff out. I would say definitely. Yeah. Annie Jacobson came on. I want the inside school.

Come on. Annie Jacobson came on the show and she was talking about biological war. The Russians had developed this weapon that had, you know, you need to think about the incubation period, the mortality, the transmissibility, all of this stuff. And they'd put one of the side effects of this disease, this infectious disease, was euphoria. So people would feel great for about 24 hours and go out dancing, go out partying, want to go and be social, go for dinner, spend time with friends. They'd engineered euphoria into the pathogen. Oh, so you would go spread.

Super spreader. Yeah. It would encourage you. Because if you feel sick, then we're in bed. And maybe you don't go in. and they'd realize, so if we make people feel great, they'll spread this even faster. That was, that made, still now sort of hairs on my own. Like, it makes me feel so.

Have we got the fucking energy weapon, Jared? Is this thing? I also wouldn't even work on me. If I got that, I'd be like, I'm staying in. I'm not going anywhere. I'll watch Love on this picture. I'm not going anywhere. I feel too good to go out.

Right there. Whoa. are mounting in Serbia for an independent investigation into whether a sonic weapon was used by security forces on people protesting government corruption. Although does it look like it? A progressive Serbian opposition

party alleged that a sonic weapon is a class not included on the government's list of legal weapons. Just totally silent. This was the video. You see here. Just from nothing. Like out of nowhere. But you think that they would go like, ugh,

or like they would make some, they didn't. They kind of just like sensed a panic that something's coming. And you're right. that panic, like, in World War I, they had to get control over the guys that would run messages back and forth because if a guy was running from the front line, back to tell his commander what was going on.

And, like, I go running away and you see me and you're like, oh, Docco's running, you start running. We all just start running. So there might have been a little bit of that in that scenario. Also, like, if it's really jolting you like that, like you lose, you know, bodily flu, all the stuff. Like, you'll be see someone having a reaction to it, is what I'm saying. You piss yourself and be like, what the hell is.

I thought they used that. So Venezuela was the country. Disarming, you know. Yeah, something happened. I heard that about Venezuela that they're sitting there and they just kind of came right in. Or they cut their power. What do they cut their power or something? For the extraction of future.

Yeah, yeah. No. Speaking to the right guy. Things that you can't say. How much do you get, without saying it, how much do you still get to find out about cool shit that goes on? Do you still get to hear some cool shit? I hear a certain cool shit. And how do you hear it?

They can't text it to him. They can't text it. to you. How do you hear it? So cool, knowing about cool shit. It's going to be the right WhatsApp chat. You're the right WhatsApp chat. What's what I'm saying? It's like, where are they sharing this secret information? No, I didn't worry about it. Just got a fucking TV. Yeah. He goes, hey, jump on the CB radio. No one's in here.

Yeah. Yeah. Is that really happened? We do testosterone for the soldiers? I saw that in the headline. Of course. Can we give soldiers testosterone? Well, yeah, I think that's what they're saying is they're opening it up. And, you know, there is, there is, guys have had problems with us and it's the same, you know, the, the TBI is the traumatic brain injuries. One of the things it impacts is your ability to, I guess is it your pineal gland that makes testosterone?

Cacao. Ciccow? We get some cacao and see testosterone. So guys that have issues with that, they, you know, and plus they're stressed out all the time. They don't get much sleep and all this stuff, and it impacts their testosterone. So they're saying they're going to check them more

and give them more testosterone. How many guys that are in special forces do you think are doing it without any, they're not on any pain meds, not on any sleep meds, and any anti-anxiety stuff. Is it rare that someone's not supported in one form or another's head?

DJ Shipley there, and he might be an extreme case, but he was explaining he's on 50 tablets a day, he's on up as to wake him up and down as to get him down and pain killers to stop his pain. Yeah, I mean, I think, I think for someone like DJ

who gets on that cycle of you get hurt, right? You don't want to stop working, so you've got to take something to make the pain go away, so then you start taking something to make the pain go away, and the pain gets worse because you're not training you're not giving any rest and so now you're doing more stuff to make the pain go away well eventually you go I need something to get me back to focus because my pain's going away and so is my you know motor skills so now you're going on something else so I think that's the cycle that guys can get caught on but you know I you know I there's a lot of people that don't do anything you know what I mean I mean I never even took Ambien like there was a lot of guys that would take Ambien to sleep I never took I never took anything I never took a dog during time military career yeah and but I mean I never even took a lot of guys that I don't think I'm not I don't think that's as rare as you might think it is but I will say when

guys get hurt it's DJ's got the exact story like a guy gets hurt no one wants to come out of the game right no one wants to come out of the game so you do whatever you got to do to stay in the game and that means you're the cycle that I just talked about so that definitely happens because you're in an injury prone job I mean you get just the day-to-day life fast roping out of helicopters landing on this deck of the ship that's going up and down you know, humping through the desert, carrying buddy carrying people. Like, it's a day-to-day grind on your body that is, you know,

the bad back, bad shoulders, bad knees, the whole nine yards. And that's happening all the time. So guys have to do what they want to do or what they have to do to stay in the game. You imagine if comedy was a sober pursuit, if no one was allowed to use any enhancements? I know. I think about that a lot, actually, is like how often we call something cheating. It's like, who cares?

Yeah. Like, if you found out that, like, some of the most, brilliant minds of the past were using some sort of enhancement or psilocy. He wouldn't give a shit. Like he wrote a great song. Yeah, that was whatever. Same with that. Like, people go, because I know a lot of, like, military guys, but then also police men

and fire department who, they do steroids or they do, like, testosterone. And I go, good. I want you to be a strong, whatever you think is going to work, bro. You're not hitting home runs for the giants, you know? Like, we need you the best you can be, dude. So, yeah, it's okay. You use it. But also we should all use it.

If you're going to make better comedy because you smoke pot or you do mushrooms or wherever, then whatever it takes. I think about that with business. You know, business is an untested federation. But no one in the Futsi 100, 500 is going, actually, I need to do a blood test on you because it seems like that CEO wasn't using modafinil and Adderall and testosterone and Ambien to make sure. So people care about sports because it's supposed to be a really fair organization.

but in the world of business, which people care about, maybe even more than they care about sports, totally untested. There's this famous clip of Sam Altman from quite a while ago, and somebody's asking him when he was on his grind or Y Combinator,

how many hours per day can he be productive? He says, well, if you're taking Armadaphanel, you know, up to kind of 18 or 20, I suppose, and you think, oh, yeah, actually, if you're in some fast-paced tech organization, there is no limit. You just do whatever you do, and no one's going to come in and go,

this is bad for your health or whatever, you're maximizing shareholder value, who gives a fuck. Right. And comedy's kind of the same. If this makes you perform better, no comic can go, hey man,

your set was good last night, but I'd love to see you do it without weed. Right? Yeah, no. Well, that's why I get so mad about the steroid conversation in baseball because I'm like, let them do it. I would do whatever it took to be the best at comedy.

Like, so if there was some way to cheat, take a little injection, and now I'm the funniest guy that affects my money, that affects my reputation. I'd do it. So I get it when baseball players are going, hey man, I want to play baseball. I want to go fight for my country. You take what you're going to do what you do to stay in the game.

It's the thing around military operators, if there's pushback against them being given something that makes them more effective, we are not supposed to be playing within the rules. There are some rules, right, Geneva Convention, outside of those and a couple of other things that your government puts on top of you. It's like everything should be on the table. Surely, surely if there's one thing that we can all agree, national security and not dying and killing the other guy, like that should be pretty uncontroversial. Yeah, and it's easy to get caught up in like this short term. Because look, if I'm not the best I possibly can be right now, then I'm not going to live, right? So I'm just going to do whatever I can right now. But I think the long term negative health impacts that they have is like you don't want to take these guys who and just destroy them from a health perspective.

or when they're 35, they're just like train wrecks. Trading in their performance today, but like killing them tomorrow. And there is some element to the fact that, hey, if I'm like on steroids and now I'm on deployment and I go into the field for 24 days, do I have no like natural testosterone? Am I just a disaster? You know what I mean? Yeah, I do. In my pack, I've got a small cool bag with a couple of ice packs so I can keep my testosterone

and make sure that. Yeah. Well, that legless guy brought a cake to Mount Ever. He can pack some syringes and get a little, come on, what are we talking about? He had candles. 34, get out of here. But also, it depends, too, like, is it saying they can have it if they want, or you're getting, like, 20-year-olds would be like, bro, let's go?

No, I think they're just testing them. I think it should be enforced. Yeah, like, fired up. You have to have 1,500 nanogram per deciliter of testosterone, and if you don't. You're not doing your best. You know, we need to be working hard. Or just at that point, it's like, go mecholster. suits.

Go what? Necks suits. We have like the robotic. Oh, I like those. I've seen those allowed on movies. That's the alternative. That's how I know. Yeah, why not?

What do you think about psychedelic therapy for PTSD and stuff? DJ's on here talking about Ibegain and all of this stuff? I haven't done it. I know a lot of guys that have done it and it's been very helpful to them. And I know a smaller number of guys

that have done it and hasn't been helpful. So it's adverse or just not helpful. There's been some that have been adverse, but that's a pretty small number compared to the amount. And I believe that the people have had adverse impact. They didn't do it correctly. The integration.

They didn't do the, yeah, they didn't do the pre-work and the, all that other stuff that you're supposed to do. They just kind of like, got after it. You know what I mean? So, yeah, I think that can be problematic. Yeah. Let's give a shot. What is it?

Yeah. I'm doing. So, but, but, you. Yeah, it seems like, and they're doing legislation and everything now to try and make it legal and acceptable and paid for by the VA and all that stuff. So hopefully it's helpful. I mean, like I said, I've known some guys that have, I've known a bunch of guys that have done it. It's been very helpful.

So if it helps guys out, yeah, by all means. How many people do you think veterans would be fixed by getting one more tour? I wonder whether it's the missing being a part of it, feeling like they've got something unrequited, or whether it's like a compounding effect. over time. You've said that in and around Ramadi was like one of the best times of your life. I wonder whether you ever wished it. Fuck, like, if I could

just go back for like a couple of weeks. A hundred percent. Yeah, I mean, everybody would. Well, basically almost everybody that I know. If you told them, if I sent out a text message to my guys and was like, hey, get your gear together, I would get 97% of the guys like, Roger inbound. Like, of course.

Is that another coolest thing? I love that. We like evidently selected the right people for the job. You know, like a school teacher that's 20 years retired going, hey, do you want to come and teach a class? No way. I don't want to go back in there. Meanwhile, someone that's not been in combat for a little while,

it's like, just give me the call. We were, we got to Ramadi and I sent, I went out with some of my guys to, we were in Western Ramadi, and there was real problems in Eastern Ramadi, and we took an element out to Eastern Ramadi for like a week. And it was super gnarly. The living conditions were, We're absolutely terrible.

We're living in a bombed out building, dirt floors, like bugs all over the place. Very, very hot, totally uncomfortable. And then there was real heavy fighting out there. And, you know, a lot of casualties, not with my guys on that particular time, but in this week, there's a lot of casualties, Army, Iraqi Army, like, it's very tough region in Ramadi. We get done doing some missions out there. We come back and I'm going to send out some guys out there permanently. And I'm talking to the platoon commander, a guy named Seth Stone.

I said, hey, you know, you're going to take some guys out there. And he goes, well, you know, I don't want to pick someone because I don't want to take guys out there if they don't want to go. And I said, okay, fair enough. So I walked into our big platoon space and I wrote on the board, you know, hey, going to Camp Corregador. And I brought the guys and I'm like, hey, I'm going to send six or seven guys out there permanently. You guys know the deal that we're out there. If you weren't out there, then here's the deal. it's terrible living conditions.

The chances of getting wounded or killed is decently high. There's going to be a lot of operations, and I don't know when you're coming back. If you want to go on that, put your name on the board. And I walked out. And it came back 20 minutes later, and every single guy's name was on. Nice. Yeah. I love that.

So these are Americans. You know what I mean? That's so sick. I love it. It's the sickest thing. It's fucking awesome. It's so cool. I mean, while we talk on microphones for me.

What if there was a guy who didn't get it? I know. You had one guy who just didn't put his name up there. Well, I mean, everyone else was. So I figured I would have, but everyone else. Some little bitch. Nope. Nope.

Not Matt crew right there. Yeah, he's good. John Smith. Yeah. One guy wrote someone else's name. Matt. Yeah, that is really nice. You hear that.

You're like, damn, that's awesome. Yeah. Just chose the right guys for the job. Yeah. You know? It's a... It's fucking wild. Boys, I appreciate you all.

You're all awesome. Thanks for having. Anything coming up, any stuff to push, any things? Just shows. Matt McCuster.com. A bunch of stand-up shows. Jeffdye.com. Got a little special coming out soon, but other than that.

When's the movie? Movie November 25th. Yep, November 25th. Global release, yeah. I wrote a bunch of kids' books. Kids books have been turned into a movie. It's made by Skydance, and it's coming out on Apple. It's starring Chris Pratt.

Wait, so can you explain it? What do you mean? The kids' books are a movie. The kids' books, so I wrote a bunch of kids' books, and they're a series of kids' books, and they turned basically the first two books, kind of combined them together to make the first movie. The Way of the Warrior Kid. Yeah, it comes out on November 25th. Have you seen the trailer?

Oh, that's right. You saw the trailer. That's right. It looks so fucking cool. It's so good. It's for families, for adults, for everybody. They call it a four-quadrant movie, which means everybody in the, you know. the family from the kids to the grandparents will all. And I've seen it. You know, it's,

it's so good. I'm so so super stoked on it. Thank you. Thank you all, boys. All right. Thank you. Thanks for everyone. Bye, my beities. Dude. Two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation walk. Challenge yourself. friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.ca.