Modern Wisdom - The Art of Unstoppable Self-Belief - Joe Santagato - #1108

Episode Date: June 8, 2026

Joe Santagato is a comedian and podcaster. Sponsors: See discounts for all the products I use and recommend: ⁠⁠https://chriswillx.com/deals⁠⁠ Get 35% off your first subscription on the ...best supplements from Momentous at https://livemomentous.com/modernwisdom Get a Free Sample Pack of LMNT’s most popular flavours with your first purchase at https://drinklmnt.com/modernwisdom Get a free bottle of D3K2, an AG1 Welcome Kit, and more when you first subscribe at https://ag1.info/modernwisdom Get 15% off your first order of my favourite Non-Alcoholic Brew at https://athleticbrewing.com/modernwisdom Get ChatGPT to explore ideas, solve problems, and learn faster at ⁠https://chatgpt.com Extra Stuff: Get my free reading list of 100 books to read before you die: ⁠⁠https://chriswillx.com/books⁠⁠ Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic: ⁠⁠https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom⁠⁠ Episodes You Might Enjoy: #577 - David Goggins - This Is How To Master Your Life: ⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Goggins⁠⁠ #712 - Dr Jordan Peterson - How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs: ⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Peterson⁠⁠ #700 - Dr Andrew Huberman - The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain: ⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Huberman⁠⁠ - Get In Touch: Instagram: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx⁠⁠ Twitter: ⁠⁠https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx⁠⁠ YouTube: ⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast⁠⁠ Email: ⁠⁠https://chriswillx.com/contact⁠⁠ - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Joe Santagato, welcome the show. Wow, that was intense. You said my name, like, so British. I love it. Thank you for having me. I have to pronounce it correctly, okay? Yeah, it's a tough one. People just read and they say Santiago.
Starting point is 00:00:11 And I'm like, all right. Anybody comes up to me and they're like, are you Joe Santiago? I'm like, yeah. Like, whatever. Imagine if there's a really famous Joe Santiago somewhere that's like, this guy keeps on taking all of my cred. I assume that that has to be the case, but it's just me. Plain old white.
Starting point is 00:00:26 That's true. Italian Irish. That's true. plain and white as you can get. Actually, plainer and whiter is British, but... That is fair. You have one of the biggest podcasts in the world, and you recently sold out Madison Square Garden.
Starting point is 00:00:40 Yeah. If you were to draw a Venn diagram of your audience, and my audience... Right. How much... How much crossover do we think there is? I think it would look like the front of a Jeep, dude. Just like, just kind of like, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:01:03 I think so. I mean, I think that people are, you like that one. Got him with the Jeep. Yeah, I don't know that there's that much crossover. I don't know. But I'm sure that. Yeah. You know what I think?
Starting point is 00:01:17 I don't really feel like I actually do have one of the biggest podcasts in the world. I think that I have a face that, because I've been on the internet for so long, that people are like, I've fucking, I've seen this guy. before, but I don't really know what's going on. You know what I mean? Like, I think it's kind of like one of those things. Well, you do have one of the biggest podcasts. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that, yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:38 You can brush it away. That was very British of you. Is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just do the self-deprecation. Well, you know, Madison Square Gardens, actually, it's only if you... Yeah, see, that doesn't even enter my consciousness that that actually happened. It's kind of a crazy, like thing.
Starting point is 00:01:55 Like, it's like, leading up to it, I went to a no-up con concert at MSG beforehand. And I'm sitting in the crowd and I'm looking around. I'm like, no fucking way, dude. I was just thinking about like how many people work here even? Like, that's a lot. And then we're going to, come on. You got to come into work for me?
Starting point is 00:02:13 Yeah, like, you're telling me that the shop's going to be open or like people are going to be selling makers mark out there and I'm going to be on stage. Are you kidding me? Like, get the fuck out of here. But yeah, it happened. It was crazy. And like the little moments, too, is when it's the craziest because I feel like I have to mentally lock in those moments
Starting point is 00:02:30 in some sort of way and just pretend like yep this is me this is my show I'm supposed to be here yeah and it's like a weird feeling but then as you're walking to the stage there's like a big vinyl like on the wall and and then it says like the basement yard and it says like sold out show
Starting point is 00:02:50 then the date or whatever and it's like that was oddly a moment or I'm like oh fuck this is happening like this is crazy and then you're walking through the hallway and you see the photos of all these famous moments that happened there. And I'm like, what is going on, dude? My mom's really good at putting it in perspective for me because she shows up and she's just like, what are we doing?
Starting point is 00:03:12 Like, what is it going on? And that's how I feel. Is that putting it in perspective? It is. It's kind of, because you could get lost in just doing the show and doing the thing. And you're kind of like, this is the next show. This is, yep, this is cool.
Starting point is 00:03:27 But this is another show. Eventually someone's just like, yeah, we're standing in Madison Square Garden right now. I'm like, I know, what the fuck's happening? Like, it's crazy, dude. And it, it honestly is, I don't know, it doesn't make sense at all. It almost feels like the support that we have from our family. Like, I don't fucking everyone says this, but like, truly there is a, I feel like I can statistically show that the support that we get from our audience is so high. compared to like the viewership you know like borderline religious it's insane like so and
Starting point is 00:04:05 which is the maddest thing because the number of comments on this video that are going to be like this guy's really funny who the fuck is he right which is what i want by the way yes i would like that but not like who's the fuck is this hose i fucking santigo is like just multiple different versions of my name they're like the fuck is this guy's name dude um damn were you drinking in here what's Yeah, yeah, yeah, get everything. No, I'm okay. Yeah, I don't even know what the fuck I was saying to me, honest. What were you talking about?
Starting point is 00:04:34 Rapid fans. The Rabbit fans, yeah. So one thing that I usually, like, kind of point to when it comes to that conversation is we have, like, a top five Patreon in the world. And they, they, they, and our viewership doesn't really match that metric. So should we be top five? Not should, but, like, the fact that we have a top five just goes to show that we were able to convert that many people into paying whatever it is every single
Starting point is 00:05:01 month to get an extra episode of this podcast which is like outrageous and we get so much support from people in that way and then all of, I think every single show that we've done outside of like a casino show here and there have all sold out and we also do really well on merch when we go to shows and it's just because there's a
Starting point is 00:05:19 rabid support of people and one thing that is very interesting that I did not expect whatsoever is people in moments that are big for us, obviously, like when we did Radio City and when we did MSG, the comments that they leave don't really feel like fanatic. It feels like a friend or someone that knows you, and they're like, I just want to let you know,
Starting point is 00:05:45 like, I'm just so proud of you. And like that just like hits so different. It's like, man, what the? I didn't expect that, you know? Like, it really feels like there is a, a, you know, sort of a relationship there, like this parisocial thing. But it truly, like, feels that way when it comes to that. Yeah. When other people are like, I know your uncle's name. I'm like, all right. Chill out. Yeah, like, don't know that. Okay, fucking P.I. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:12 Wyoming women are having the best sex in America. The women of the Cowboys State are riding more than just horses. Wyoming women are the most satisfied with their sex lives, according to a newly published report from Babeland, a sex toy boutique with locations in New York City and Seattle. Bayblan determined which states women were the most sexually satisfied through examining a host of different factors, including how often women have sex each week, how they rate their sexual experiences, as well as the number of sex shops per state and the reviews for those adult boutiques. Wyoming women were at the top of the state side pleasure heap, followed by New Hampshire, Maine, Oregon, and Texas. What do you think about that? One more time with the
Starting point is 00:06:51 with the states. So Wyoming, New Hampshire, Maine, Oregon, and Texas. Not much to do. In the areas, like in the areas,
Starting point is 00:07:02 like out in the woods or whatever, it's like, you're probably bored looking at each other, like how often, like they're probably so desensitized by the mountains and the trees that they're like, I don't know,
Starting point is 00:07:10 should we just fuck each other then? I don't know. Like, what else are you going to do? Like, I go out there and I enjoy nature and I'm like, oh my God, a deer. Because I live in New York and we see pigeons
Starting point is 00:07:17 and run over rats, and that's pretty much it. But if I lived out there, then I'd be like, I guess we'll just keep fucking each other. You think that their high-quality sex is due to boredom? Is that crazy? I actually probably know. It makes sense. I mean, if the states were very different, right?
Starting point is 00:07:37 Texas? Texas is a big state. It's true, but there's a lot of people in Houston and Dallas. That is true. But there's a lot of them. I have no idea where New Hampshire even is. What is that? what is New Hampshire?
Starting point is 00:07:52 Yes. It is a state. Yeah. But it is next to Vermont. So it's like above New York. Fuck, okay. So there is literally nothing to do that. There is, yeah, that's like a, it's a wasteland, basically.
Starting point is 00:08:04 I'm not talking shit about, actually, Vermont has really good skiing. They have ski towns. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's Killington and Stowe, so it's nice for that. But what I mean by, there's nothing is like, it's not like there's like a hub. Like no one's going on a vacation of Vermont. my point. I've been to Portland, Maine.
Starting point is 00:08:22 I'm into Portland, too. It was very nice, but there wasn't a lot going on. No, it's just, you know, lobsters and weed. They had a stuffed moose at the arrivals in the airport, like a life-sized moose. I'm into that. I like stuffed animals, but only if they're, like, to size. You want a taxidermy thing, but you don't want it to be shrunk down? No, yeah, I think that's cowardly.
Starting point is 00:08:44 Okay, so you don't want a replica moose? No, I would like a full moose to be, like, on display. because you always hear about moots, but like, have you seen one in, like, person? I've seen videos. I've only seen videos. I've only seen videos. Actually, I did see one, but it was, like, in the trees.
Starting point is 00:09:01 And I'm like, I didn't get a good look at it. I can't even remember it right now. We went to Bozeman, Montana, and did this, the longest fucking hike ever. And as we came back down, we were going to camp that night. The last time I camped, I must have been 16 or something. So I'm like, I'm excited. Like, this is cool.
Starting point is 00:09:16 I'm going camping. And there's warnings everywhere for bears. So you're really precautioned about the bears. And one of the guys, I've got this bear spray, but sort of doesn't work. I'm like, don't say that. Yeah. Don't tell me that the thing. Anyway, he's like, what you don't really need to worry about the adult bears.
Starting point is 00:09:35 What you need to worry about is the mums. Like the adult males aren't the ones that are dangerous. It's the mums. And as we're pulling in in the trap, my friend that I was with was very nervy about the bears. But the guys are like, look, the likelihood of a senior bear is really low. the likelihood of it being in between you and whatever is super low. We're all going to be around a fire in any case, the tents and all the rest of the stuff. As we're pulling in, look over the far side and there is a bear that's about this big,
Starting point is 00:10:00 like baby bear. Yeah. I'm like, you're not far from your mom. Yeah, no. Immediately he was like, I'm out, I'm not going. But we managed to convince it. But yeah, that was the fucking bears. I also got roped into beardom at one point.
Starting point is 00:10:15 When I was in Washington, I did a. van trip with my friends and we slept in a van for like a week. I took two showers. It was disgusting in there, obviously. But it was beautiful. It was one of my favorite shows I've ever been on. But I, the first hike that we did, we got up at like 3.30 in the morning and then did this hike and we had headlamps. And they were like, oh, bring a headlamp. And I'm like, yeah, you know, whatever. And we're doing this hike and I'm like pretty excited. You know, it's the first day. So I'm like, let's go. And then I hear one of my friends go like, who has the bear spray? And I was like, hold on. I'm like, why do we need bear?
Starting point is 00:10:49 spray. It's like, oh, this place has like a lot of bears. I'm like, why are we doing this? We're not even like built for this. Like we're from New York City. Like, you know, I'm sure there's people who live around there that know what to do in that situation, but like, we're spraying. We're hoping, we're banking on a spray. I can't. I can't. But I mean, we ended up doing it, didn't see a bear. If I did see a bear, though, like, I don't know. First of all, I'm shitting my pants. I know they can smell that. So like we're, I'm leaving a trail. I don't know. That's how we track them. I'm sure. I'm sure they're tracking us when people are shitting their pants like me.
Starting point is 00:11:22 They can smell that. You're telling me that your fear is attracting the bear. No, the fear is resulting in the shit. My fear, oh, well, yes, I guess that my fear is that with this inevitable shit in my pants, I will be leaving breadcrumbs back to our car. I'll be molded by a bear because of how much of a pussy I've been. Yeah, yeah. When it comes to, I love animals, but when it comes to, like, I love animals when I'm prepared to see them.
Starting point is 00:11:47 you don't be jump scared by them no I don't really like that I don't like that shit in movies either I like to be prepared for things but I don't like that I don't like the you know like if I'm out in public and I saw like even a cat would get me
Starting point is 00:12:01 if it was like running real quick I don't like quick shit I'm serious we were in the garden after yesterday before I came for dinner with you and my housemate was looking at this squirrel and he's like dude can you imagine if squirrels were any bigger than they are
Starting point is 00:12:14 the fucking pace the frame rate that squirrels move at is so fast. Dude. If they wanted you, you would be completely dead. Even at the size they are, clambering all over you,
Starting point is 00:12:22 you'd just flail forever and then be died. This is unbelievable. I feel like I'm speaking to my conscience because I have talked about this so many times. But my thing is like,
Starting point is 00:12:31 fuck the size that they are. If they decided, it's over. It is over. Because what am I going to do? I can't fight two squirrels. One, I could probably like rip off me. Two of them, though,
Starting point is 00:12:42 I mean, they're eating my eyes out. Because they're so fast and they let you see him get up a tree. Yep. It's at the speed of light. So, like, this isn't happening for me.
Starting point is 00:12:51 Like, I'm not that. So if the squirrels wanted to, they could... You're going to try and fee, fie, foe, foamy away through getting around this fucking squirrel that's all over you? It's a fear of mine. I also don't really like birds. Oh, I hate bugs. You want to see me turn into a little bitch. You put a cockroach on this table right now.
Starting point is 00:13:07 Don't like that at all. As a New Yorker? I think... Yeah. I don't like it. It's the animal of your city. I know. It's a state bird.
Starting point is 00:13:13 I don't like it at all. I don't like things that have, like... you know, like little hands and antennas, and they're like wet. Yeah, like, you know, like you see like tarantulas up close and it's like, how many eyes does this thing have? And then they have, it looks like they have a couple mouths and a bunch of teeth and I'm like, I just.
Starting point is 00:13:33 Not for me. Not for me at all. And they're hairy. I can't. It's too much. What do you think they think of you? That's a great question for, when you interview a tarantula,
Starting point is 00:13:41 I'm going to watch that fucking episode. I am going to watch that. Let me tell you. Joe Santiago. What do you, have a look. Jose Santiago. How do you feel about tarantulas? Maybe that's the guy that everybody thinks that you look like.
Starting point is 00:13:57 Probably. I'm sure there's... There's got to be thousands. You've got this line, be realistic about where you stand, but not where you can go. Yeah. What's that mean?
Starting point is 00:14:05 I think that that is the thing that, like, helps me the most. Like, I really feel like my... If you could pick a superpower that you have, like something that, you know, is the reason for the way you are. British accent. Right.
Starting point is 00:14:21 Well, yeah, honestly. Honestly, yes. And you're in good shape. Those two things, I would talk everything up to that. Yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. That's why I mean, I went for a run this morning. That's why.
Starting point is 00:14:33 But I think that being realistic with yourself, especially like where you stand at the moment, is very important because a lot of people do this thing where they conflate manifesting and I don't know, this positive affirmation thing for like just tell yourself that you're better than you are, which I think that has a place in certain areas, but I do think it's important to realize where you are because it helps you, it humbles you. And you say, this is where I am right now and this is what I'm capable of. And if you know yourself, then no one can really say anything to you. You can't be
Starting point is 00:15:07 hurt by a comment or anything like that. You are on a mission. I know who I am. And then the, be on or what i don't even know the fuck the rest of it was but it's like like not being realistic about where you can go i'm extremely unrealistic about that part so that part i i really believe that i can accomplish anything i don't think it's easy but like i'll give you an example that's like insane and some people are going to be like fuck this kid but i saw a video of ben afflack and matt damon winning the uh academy award for best screenplay and I watched it back like 20 times. Not kidding. I'm also like that. I'll watch it like crazy if I'm like feeling something from it. But I'm watching that and a part of me is going like I can do that. And I don't like in a sane mind I don't. Obviously that's crazy to say. But I do believe that. Like I believe that I can't do it right now. I don't think I'm capable or like my first shot at I can do it. But I feel like I can. Like I if I wanted to and really apply myself, I can do that. Obviously, that counts for nothing.
Starting point is 00:16:14 You have to put in all that work. But I think the fact, I think letting yourself know that it is possible and you are capable of actually achieving that goes a long way. You know, like having certain people that blow up as a musical artist that came from like a small town or whatever. Like that is very inspiring to those people that live in a small town or anyone that lives in a small town. Like that's a relatable thing. It's like, well, usually only people from L.A. or movie stars. You came from this small town, so I live in a small town over here. So that lets me know that, like, oh, it is possible to make it in some sort of way.
Starting point is 00:16:53 And that's just an example of that, where if you allow yourself to be like, I can do that. Like, if I wanted to and I am, I become, like, obsessed with things, like, very passionate about things to the point. Like, I'm nuts, dude. Like, I'm fucking crazy. Like, I, when I really, like, when I was thinking about MSG, and Radio City, those were two really big moments in my life. And for Radio City, I, I knew what song I wanted to, like, I wanted us to come out to, like, a year before it even happened.
Starting point is 00:17:25 Before it actually was booked, I, like, knew what song I wanted it to be, and I wanted to know, like, I knew how we were going to promote it and all these other things, because I, like, hear a song, and then it kind of motivates me a little bit, and I have to listen to it a bunch of times to the point where, like, now I'm visualizing this thing. I'm doing the manifesting. And I literally was listening, because the song is Bob O'Reilly. Teenage Waste, plan.
Starting point is 00:17:52 Fire. So I had that song in mind for this. And then I would like, if I went for a run and I put it on, like sometimes I would just cry because I just like want it so bad. But I don't know. Sometimes I want that and I don't even know what I want. Like I'm just very intense about, this is going to sound
Starting point is 00:18:13 I mean I don't know we got this so like but like energy is so like real to me and if I can hear a song or I see a video or I see someone talking about something and it resonates with me
Starting point is 00:18:25 even a little bit I have to watch it religiously and I just want to understand so much of like why I feel that way and it inspires me and I really think that like
Starting point is 00:18:38 not it goes beyond people saying like anything is possible, which is true. But that's like very general. Like, I feel very capable. Like, I actually feel capable to do things. And just because I think it, obviously that means nothing. But I do, I, there's like a feeling at me. Like, truly, like, it's like in my body that I really feel like if I go after some sort of project, I will get it done in some way. Or I'll fail at it, which is totally fine because that doesn't stop me. Like, obviously you're going to fail. Failed many times, many times. But it doesn't stop me from wanting to get to that position. I will always go. I'd never get discouraged.
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Starting point is 00:20:06 it, they will just give you your money back. Plus, they ship internationally. Right now, you can get up to 35% off your first subscription and that 30 day money back guarantee by going to the link in the description below or heading to live momentous.com slash modern wisdom and using the code modern wisdom a checkout. Have you always felt like that or have you trained yourself into feeling like this? It sounds like you've got a lot of self-belief, at least for the future. Yeah, I do. Um, I, yes, I would say that I always kind of felt that way. Partially, uh, in certain ways were how I grew up. I always felt like I'll be fine, even if I wasn't going to be. I was perfectly okay with not really being fine, like financially, like not being fine.
Starting point is 00:20:50 And I literally just wanted to do this sort of thing. That's all I wanted to do was to have this job and entertain people. It wasn't about how much money. It was literally like, I want to do it and I kind of want to do it on my own terms. And I want to stand out and I want to be as authentic as possible. So that's kind of what my goal was. Like that's what drives me is to, I don't want to veer too far off from the person I was when I first started doing all this, if that makes sense. Because the mindset, like I was just talking about, like, that hasn't changed at all, the way that I sort of viewed it.
Starting point is 00:21:28 Like, I think I can do it, so I have to do it my way sort of thing. And part of that is because I'm very realistic with myself, I am, I love criticism. Like, that resonates especially. Like, if people are just like hating and it doesn't really hit you at all, that, whatever, it doesn't matter. But when someone criticizes you or they have advice for you and they say something and you're like, ooh, like, I love that. I love those moments.
Starting point is 00:21:53 Part of the reason why me and Greg worked together is because of years ago, I, like, wrote a script and I was like showing like my friends and family and shit. They're like, oh, my God, this is so funny. sent it to him. He sent me back like eight pages on why it sucks. Like, like so many things like why it sucks. And I was reading all of them and I'm like, oh my God, these makes so much sense. And like, that's exciting for me. Because it's like now I'm making some sort of progress. Like there's no way I'm getting this right on the first try. Like I am super down to be wrong because I'm not, I'm not trying to be right about I can do something. Like I'm trying to do something extraordinary, which is going to
Starting point is 00:22:31 require some sort of collaboration, especially at this point, especially if you want to do something really extraordinary and win some sort of award or whatever. Like, my approach would be to something like that, the Academy Award is what I'm talking about, which is not actually like a goal. I don't want people to feel like, this is what I'm doing over here. But it's more of like, if I get the opportunity, I'm putting everything into this thing and I will dot every I and cross every T. And I am not trying to get it greenlit. Like, I'm trying to get it to be the greatest show anyone's ever seen for its category. You know, like, that is kind of my approach to those things.
Starting point is 00:23:13 And I feel very capable, especially with, like, the people that I have around me, like, I get a lot of help and I believe in them tremendously. And I think that we're super lean, but I just feel very capable in that way. We didn't really expand the team like crazy for any of these big moments. kept it like the people. We were all doing it for the first time and we were figuring it out. And, you know, after realizing that I'm referring to touring now, but it was just six of us. And really like four of us are kind of like making decisions and dealing with the companies and whatever. But we wanted to do it ourselves. A company had offered help to, you know, help with the tour.
Starting point is 00:23:56 But we wanted to do it. We felt that we were capable. We also wanted to see how involved it was. and if we were just going to give money away to somebody or if we could handle it ourselves. And we did the show for two years, had a very good success with it, and now we know what's involved. But that was always going to be the approach because it's like we can do it.
Starting point is 00:24:18 Like, let's just do it ourselves. And a lot of people, we heard from a lot of venues that a lot of people show up with, like, big team and they have, you know, this and that. Granted, we don't really have like a super involved show, to be fair. but they were people were always kind of like oh it's just you guys I'm like yeah you turned up at MSG with five people yeah and they were like
Starting point is 00:24:38 there was a stage manager that um like they have people there like they but like usually i mean MSG is a different thing they hire like some guy who's like done it and he's like for real um but in other places it's just someone who works at the theater and and sometimes you get to a theater that's like super old and, you know, like in Tampa, I don't even remember the name of the venue, but we went there in the computer that they tried to upload our, like, show to, basically, because we have some assets on the screen and whatnot
Starting point is 00:25:10 and some other components. The computer was, like, from fucking 1857. And the guy's like, hold on, I got a MacBook. He brings out something from 1995. I'm like, we're getting warmer, but this won't turn on. And we had to get our photographer to go back to the hotel room, get his laptop, set up the entire show and then we basically ran the entire thing.
Starting point is 00:25:31 So sometimes you run into that if you don't have an entire team like that that shows up and like plugs in and does the whole thing. But we like to keep it super lean. I enjoy that. And I enjoy saying that all this stuff that you see and everything that we've kind of accomplished have come from these people. What's the gender split of your show, of your audience? I believe it's around 70-30 female.
Starting point is 00:25:56 So it skews female. It may be like a little lower than that. And then at the live shows? The live shows it's overwhelming me, overwhelmingly female. Yeah. 90%, 95%. I mean, I don't know about 95%, but we're getting there. Like it's, I think it's probably like realistically like 85%.
Starting point is 00:26:13 Like it's a lot. To the point where people's Apple Watchers go off. Yes, I told you about that. But it's very loud. My first show ever, I was like super nervous. And I didn't really know what to expect. didn't know if we were going to do a good job. And I walked out on stage and the only thing I could think about was how loud it was. I was like, oh my God. Like I've never heard something like this before.
Starting point is 00:26:35 I've never, I've never like been on a stage in front of that many people. Our first show, I think, was 1,700 people in New Jersey. And I was like, holy shit. New Jersey women will make a lot of noise. Yeah, they do make a lot of noise. Yeah. Oh my God. A lot of that. Yeah. So one of the most common areas. I think it's the most commonly cited psychological area for growth that women want to work on. And certainly at my shows, because I do a lot of Q&A, it's the most common thing that women talk about to me as well is imposter syndrome. And what you have is kind of like reverse imposter syndrome. I also have imposter syndrome, though. But you have it at a level where why is everybody here for me, but at no point does it put a ceiling on where you think that you can go. So I think for a lot of people, their sense of self now is, I shouldn't be here.
Starting point is 00:27:31 And that bleeds over into, and therefore, I definitely can't go that much further. Does that make sense? Sure. And I think that, at least by the sounds of things, you sometimes get surprised with like, what the fuck is like, MSG and radio city with all of these people. And apparently it's 130 decibels. Yeah. And, but that doesn't slow you do. down going forward? No, because one now I also feel like an enormous responsibility because for a long time it was just me who was making all the decisions and I was, I didn't have any employees, so I didn't have anyone, or I did have an employee, but we were younger, so there wasn't a lot of stakes. But now I have employees that have children, that have mortgages, that have, you know,
Starting point is 00:28:17 things to pay for. And like, there's a little bit more of a pressure from that. But I, I also, in those moments, I have imposter syndrome where I kind of feel like this is obviously very ridiculous that this many people are here. And I don't, I don't really know how it happened. Because it feels very quick. Like it just kind of flies by and then you're, you're there. I'm standing on stage at MSG in front of a sold out crowd and you're kind of like, what the hell did I do to get here? I don't even remember. And that's like, that's a, that's a, you know, a weird experience.
Starting point is 00:28:51 but I don't even know where I was going with that, to be honest, but it's, I do have imposter syndrome, but in those moments, a part of me is also like, I can't get scared. Like, I can't stop this because too many people are kind of counting on it. And I think that I, I sort of owe it to myself in a way that I should keep pushing
Starting point is 00:29:14 and seeing what I'm capable of. Because really the only thing that I think holds a lot of people back is this fear. of things like that where you're like well this is either that's not for me completely
Starting point is 00:29:25 or this is good enough or you know this is good enough is actually not what I want to say because I think that everything
Starting point is 00:29:32 that I've been doing is like good enough but I just want to know that like I want to know what my full potential is like I want to know
Starting point is 00:29:38 what I'm capable of there's still fear that lives in me that feels like you turn down certain opportunities or you don't do certain things
Starting point is 00:29:47 because of fear and you especially How much do you feel that? How much do you feel for? All the time. I think all the time. I mean, there's certain parts of it that there's certain parts of it that I'm afraid of. And it gets easier when you kind of do stuff. I was afraid to do live shows. I was, I was like nervous about doing it because you're so comfortable, like, just on the internet. And it's like, you can you can edit it. There's no, like, really high stakes. But can you perform. for two hours in front of people. Like, that's a very big jump in a different thing, especially when you're doing a podcast show that people have no expectations coming into the show.
Starting point is 00:30:31 Like, what the fuck is it going to be? Like, are you going to get on there and sit on stage and talk to your boy? And that's going to be the whole show. Like, it can't be that. It can be. Some people do it. But I was not interested in that whatsoever.
Starting point is 00:30:42 Lazy people do it. Yeah. I was not interested in that whatsoever. I held off until we had a good idea and also at a point where we felt like we are hitting a stride and the show has like grown to the point and this feels like, okay, this is a logical next step, but we're going to make it worth it for people because I, going back to what I was saying before, none of this is for the money. I really just am not motivated by money at all.
Starting point is 00:31:07 So I would feel horrible if I went out there and didn't try. And if they loved it, it would make it worse. Because then it would feel like, oh, I manipulated them into giving my money and they're happy. Why are they happy? I didn't even try. I mailed it in. Yeah, I mailed it in. And they're happy about that. Like, they shouldn't be happy about that. Like, they should hold me to a higher standard, you know?
Starting point is 00:31:30 And I think that's like manipulation. I mean, people do that to their audience. There's a line, the guy who you didn't know Alex there. No, I know Alex. I just was shocked by the fact that you guys were up there. Yeah, it's very regal. Wow. He's got a line which says,
Starting point is 00:31:45 control freak is a word that people with low standards use to describe people with high standards. Control freak is a term that people with low standards used to describe people with high standards. And what you've said is dotting every eye, crossing every tea, spending a lot of time obsessing over it. It sounds like you're quite obsessive to me. Like, I mean, by definition, I watch a video and there's a section of a video that I can't stop thinking about because it gives me goosebumps or it makes me cry. that you're obsessing over this emotion, this energy, you're obsessing over this vibe, you're obsessing over this song for your show
Starting point is 00:32:22 that hasn't even yet been booked. And I've got this idea that I think obsessions really misunderstood by people, that we're all obsessed with discipline and motivation. The motivation's cool because it's kind of like relatively free discipline. Like it makes you want to do the thing. And discipline is you making yourself do the thing.
Starting point is 00:32:40 Yeah. Like that's Goggins and Jocco and getting up at 4.30 a.m. and spit and sawdust and willpower and stuff like that. Yeah. But then there is this next level, which is obsession. An obsession is I can't not do the thing. I'm unable to stop myself from doing it.
Starting point is 00:32:57 That has been something that is very present in my life for the longest time. I dropped out of college because of that feeling. And when I was, I went to a, I don't even know why I did this, but I was in high school. I went to a Catholic high school. I was a good student, you know, like near 90s, you know, something like that, whatever. letter that is. But when it came time to apply for colleges, I just never did it.
Starting point is 00:33:20 Like, you're supposed to do that in like November or something, and I just never did it because, and I don't, I couldn't even tell you why. I don't even know what my rationale was at the time. But then I lied to my parents and I said, yeah, I applied here and there, and I'm just waiting. Like, just to put off hearing about it. And then I eventually just went to, I told my parents I didn't get into
Starting point is 00:33:39 any schools. And then I went, which is like insane. if that actually happened, which, whatever. But I went to a community college. I went to a school called Queensboro Community College. And I did a semester there. And it was very hard for me because I just felt so strongly that it wasn't for me. And it bothered me that that's like a thing that a lot of people say.
Starting point is 00:34:04 And I'm like, am I just one of those people that's like, oh, you know, school's just not for me. And it's kind of like, because I didn't think I was better than it. Like I still don't think that. And I think that it has its place for sure. But there was something in me. There was like a feeling of like, I can't go back. Like I can't. Like I don't have a plan.
Starting point is 00:34:23 At that time, I was making some YouTube videos, but they were amounting to nothing, really. I enjoy doing it. But it wasn't like I thought, this is what I'm going to do. This was also in 2011 when there wasn't influencers. There wasn't even Instagram. There was nothing.
Starting point is 00:34:39 So the idea that you could make a career off of this like didn't really exist. So there wasn't like this guiding light of like, I'm going to do this. I was doing YouTube videos and I wasn't getting paid any money to do them. But I did feel like maybe if I grew this to a certain point,
Starting point is 00:34:54 I could leverage the audience into like an audition for something. I don't know. Like I wasn't really thinking, but I didn't necessarily want to be an actor. I just liked doing that at the time. But something was pushing me away. And I literally would drive to the school
Starting point is 00:35:11 and sit in the car. Very dramatic. And I would just stare at the school and I'm like, I literally just can't get myself to go. And going back to why I'm an insane person, there was one time where I literally had like a notebook and I just wrote out like an interview that like Barbara Walters was doing with me
Starting point is 00:35:32 where she was like walking me around. She's like, so this is your college. And I was like thinking like that, like, I just want something so bad. I know I can't get it in there. You didn't even know what it was. No. Which is stupid. That's very, that's really interesting, right? Because you've got, you had ambition
Starting point is 00:35:47 without direction. Zero. I had a lot of passion and ambition and it was like putting it in a box. You didn't even know what your passion was for. No. Most people don't realize how much being dehydrated impacts their performance, which is why for the last five years, I've started pretty much every morning with Element. Element is a tasty electrolyte drink mix with everything that you need and nothing that you don't. This orange salt in a cold glass of water is like a, sweet, salty, orangey nectar, and I really tell the difference when I take it versus when I don't. It plays a critical role in reducing muscle cramps and fatigue, helps to optimize brain health and regulate your appetite while also curbing cravings.
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Starting point is 00:36:50 So that's really, really interesting. Because I think a lot of the time people assume that in order to move, you need to have a plan, you need to know where you're going. And that's kind of classic. My background on the podcast for the first couple of years was kind of productivity, bro. It was deep work and focus timers and learning how to organize your desk
Starting point is 00:37:10 and using notes, apps and stuff. Almost everything didn't work, except for just building up the muscle of trying to not get distracted and probably not using your phone as much as you want to, right? Like, that's kind of it. Anyway, a lot of the standard advice is set your 25-year goal and then break it down into five-year periods and then you do it in 18-month blocks
Starting point is 00:37:34 and it's 90-day sprints and build this all together. But it kind of bide. pass is the fact that if you're somebody that's got a passion, that's got passion, all you need to do is find something to plug that into. And I wonder how many people, because they have a fear of not knowing what it is that they want to do, they back themselves into something that feels safe, because they're scared of having this drive, but not having the direction, like ambition without direction. Like, that's a lovely little framing.
Starting point is 00:38:13 They don't know where to put it. So they're like, well, I'll do this. I'll go to the college. I'll get the job. And then before they know it, they've kind of tumbled backward. There's an idea called sliding versus deciding. They've slid into a set of train tracks that they're now on where they're not able to use their passion.
Starting point is 00:38:30 They're not that passionate about it, but it feels really safe. Yeah. I'm super, super safe in this situation. But all of that passion is kind of still burning. doesn't really have anywhere to go. And after a while, I get the sense that if you don't keep giving it at least the fuel of the potential for dream, that it sort of burns out. I think that there are people that probably have more passion than others, because I do think there are people that are perfectly content with going to college, getting a job, and that's their life. And I think that's
Starting point is 00:38:59 amazing. Like, I think that as long as you feel fulfilled, like, you should do that. They are very lucky. Yeah. They're very lucky because the alternative is that you need to contort yourself into this weird fucking shape. Yeah. Run all over the planet trying to work out who you are. A part of me was afraid because I did have all that passion and I didn't know where to put it. I think that I think that if you're lucky enough to find something that really lights a fire in you, like something that you actually enjoy like this is the thing.
Starting point is 00:39:32 Like you don't, for me, it's like you need to do it. Like I need to do that. not do it. I can't. Like I can't. I have to. And that's why like dropping out of college felt like that. Like I was, that was the first time that I felt something like, it was almost, it had a physical reaction to me where it was like, dude, don't do that. And there was no fucking plan. And mind you, I was always like a good student growing up and I played sports and stuff. And I felt like there was a lot of, there was high expectations for me. And then I was not fulfilling that at all. And then I'm going to go, well, I'm also dropping out of college, you know? And that was. a lot of ls in a short space of time. Oh my god, dude. It is a lot of elves. And there was only one time where I was like, man, I'm fucking this up bad. Like, maybe I'm just like full of shit. Like you think, do you have, just because I have all this passion. Oh, my ambition. Exactly. It's like, bro, this counts for nothing. No one cares that you're passionate. Like,
Starting point is 00:40:25 and you're waiting for what? Like, what are you waiting for? Like, what are you going to do? And then there was a time where I did have that realization of, because when I was younger, I was a little more like arrogant about it in my head where I was like, I'm going to find something. Like I was like kind of sure, which not sure. But there was a moment where like all my friends are going to college and some of them away, some of them are in the neighborhood, some of them have jobs and whatever. And I'm literally doing nothing now because I dropped out of college. I don't even have a job at this point. How did that feel?
Starting point is 00:40:56 Like a fucking loser, dude. Like I just, I literally felt like that was the first time that I ever told myself like, you're full of shit. dude. Like you have all this passion and, you know, I'm sitting in a car writing a fucking nice Barbara Walters interview. Yeah, like, what am I talking about? Yeah, like, she'll be dead by the time this happens anyway. But like I was like, I was, you're sitting there writing that and then a part of me is like, I'm upset with myself because I'm like, you told yourself the lie and you believed it. And I do believe it is sort of like a lie because that could get you in trouble and it would have got me in trouble too.
Starting point is 00:41:35 If I followed that passion, because no matter what, I was following that, I followed the excitement as far as, like, professionally is, and I think that's important, especially even now, if you ask me, like, what's your five-year plan? I don't have one. I'm waiting for the excitement to appear. I'm at the point now where it's a little easier to do that because I can kind of sit back a little bit and sort of rest on my laurels and, you know, kind of make decision. And I could kind of float here. But if something pops up and that excites me, that's what I'm doing. Like, and I have idea. It could look totally different. You know what it sounds like? It sounds like one of the things that you've really steered away from, at least when making your life decisions, is obligation. I don't feel, not like you're not... Dan, are you telling my dad? You're not obliged to do something just because people expected you to. Just because you were doing it previously. Just because your parents might have wanted you to do it. Like, I understand. Obligation comes with a lot of baggage. The fucking childhood trauma coming through your eyes.
Starting point is 00:42:33 No, no, no. But I do know what you mean. But I think that's true. Like, a lot of people feel obligated to go and do something. They even feel obligated to keep moving. Right. There's this sense of, oh, fuck, like, I can't just sit and wait or I can't just sit and think. And in some ways, that's true. Right. You shouldn't just be wish it, want it, do it, dream it, believe it, and not go and work for it in your way through your life. Like, that's going to result in you being on the couch until you get, kicked out of your apartment. I also like, I have a deep desire to earn it. Like, I want to earn it. And I want people to look at me and feel like he earned it. You know, I don't want people to feel like there was a shortcut or anything like that. I think that anyone can look at the backlog of stuff that you've done and say that you haven't earned it. I'd like to think that this thing that's true for me as well. Yeah. But I feel that about things that haven't happened yet either. Like any sort of thing that pops up that I, that I, um, will do. Like, I can tell you right now, I don't know the specifics, but my life moving forward will look very random. Like, there probably will be other
Starting point is 00:43:42 projects that are like, not podcasting, not a live show, whatever, that I'm like, I'm going to put my all into that or whatever. Like, I go at the excitement and I want to be good at those things. Like, I want to. That's why I, I'm so willing to take criticism because I want to be good. Like, I want to be good. I want people to know that I'm trying really. hard to do this thing if it excites me. What do you think about the sort of current trend of people trying to be nonchalant? That was such a British pronunciation. Nonschalant.
Starting point is 00:44:12 I like that better, to be honest. Nonschalant. Nonshalant. In what way do you mean? Well, you're talking about I want people to see me trying really hard. Trying hard. Trying hard's kind of lame. To a certain category of people, especially people on the internet, which is why you
Starting point is 00:44:30 exist. Everybody thinks it's land, yeah. So there's a world at the moment that only ever talks in irony. Like, they only ever make ironic sentences, an ironic statement. Nobody stands for something legitimately. They only ever stand against things or kind of mock stuff or suggest, it's kind of like the passive aggressive pushing of your own things. Well, you know, like this thing's like, all right, I guess. As opposed to, I am giving this my absolute fucking everything in the UK, for instance. We have tall poppy syndrome, people that try really hard, called kinos, too keen. You're too keen for this thing.
Starting point is 00:45:06 You're too excitable. You'd get called fucking very American of you that, dude. Like that, really, like, it's enthusiasm's looked down on to a degree, especially if you come from a working class background, which is as scum class as I can be. Like, you are kind of encouraged to not get too big for your boots. I must have heard that thousands of times. Don't get too big for your boots.
Starting point is 00:45:33 Don't have dreams that are too big. The thing with me is I realize that. But if you're people who are acting nonchalant about, especially about things that they are actually passionate about, it's just insecurity, like manifesting in that way where it's like I need to appear like I'm not really trying, but I am trying or whatever. Like I'm not insecure about those things.
Starting point is 00:45:55 So I'm like, don't worry, I got them. But I'm not insecure. about those things, so I'm willing to try really hard at them and fail and fall on my face or whatever. And it kind of excites me, too, that there's a lot of people that aren't willing to do that because it's like, then that feels like I have a leg up on them because I'm willing to hit the ground super hard because when I hit the ground, like, then I know like that you slammed a door in my face. So I know like, okay, I got these to choose from now. Like, at least I have a decision. Like you made a final decision. Like, that failed. Then I can move on. I'm not nonchalant about it because
Starting point is 00:46:28 I'm not even doing it for the perception. I'm doing it for me. And when I say that I want to earn it, it's not necessarily for outside validation. I want to know when I go to sleep at night. Like, you worked hard and you got that thing. That feels really good. Like, that's an amazing feeling to know
Starting point is 00:46:45 that I put my all into this thing. It started as an idea. I set it out loud. I worked hard to do it. And then it happened. That's an amazing feeling. There's a quote from Mark Manson. He says,
Starting point is 00:46:57 do hard shit, not because it's fun, but because the win actually means something. You bled for it, you broke for it, you earned it. Easy wins are forgettable, hard ones change you. That's the point. Exactly. What is better than that? There is nothing better than that.
Starting point is 00:47:11 This is one of the things I think about the world of AI and how many people are maybe relying on assistance for their job or for their writing or their creative pursuits. And what it's doing is it's actually robbing you of the thing that you came here to get. Yes. The thing that you came here to get is the sensation of I did hard shit. And I worked hard for this. I got good at it too.
Starting point is 00:47:34 And I got good one rep at a time. And yeah, like that's the, that to me is like the biggest payoff. When I could watch something like an old video or I can watch like something from our first shows or just no whatever. And I'm just like, I'm better than that now, which is good. Does anyone ever put together one of those, the timeline of Josh Santigo fucking like videos of. I'm going to make it worse each time. Piece of shit. Let me try this bullshit.
Starting point is 00:48:02 You can't do you shit. The Neutronic. I'm like purposely misquoting everything. Someone did it. That's good, by the way. Sorry. Thank you. Good.
Starting point is 00:48:12 Get it in. Someone did a video a little while, like last week or something. It's really fucking good. And I watched it and they went back and analyzed the first episodes I'd ever done on the podcast. And they sent this line and they were like, you might not think that this guy would go on to become anything in regards to a successful podcaster. I was like,
Starting point is 00:48:34 it's true, but it was 1,100 episodes ago in 2018. Yeah. In the northeast of the UK in my old office in Newcastle. You know, it's funny you actually bring that up because this morning, I got a random DM from a person, and they did exist.
Starting point is 00:48:56 This is fucking weird, by the way, because now you know what I'm saying. Someone, this has never happened to me ever. I feel like I'm always the mentalist right now. You're like, no, actually. But this, that exact thing happened to me for the first time ever. Someone sent me a screenshot of, it was one, it wasn't the first episode, but it was one of the first ones. And I titled it, who the fuck is this guy? And I talked about myself and like what the podcast is going to be and like things that I believe in or whatever.
Starting point is 00:49:21 And the message that they left me was like, I just want to say that I've been a, fan of yours for a really long time and I just listened to this and it's really cool to see that, you know, you've gone on to be successful and have some fame and this and that, but like, this sounds like you. Like, you're still like the same person there. And that is like the biggest compliment that I could get because that's the whole point. Like, that's what I want. That's like what I believed in. I believed that if I was authentic enough, then I could stand out. And I had the luxury of starting when I did because there wasn't a lot of people doing it. Now everyone's doing it. But it's hard to be authentic because you're constantly sort of inspired by other things that are
Starting point is 00:50:07 happening on the internet, if that makes sense. I had the idea that if I could be authentic enough, it would work out. What's that mean? If I could be authentic enough, most people would say if I could come up with a novel enough idea, if I could be creative enough, if I could be creative enough, could work hard enough, if I could find the right niche, you're saying the key competitive advantage, the key sort of fuel that you were optimizing for, was authenticity. Yeah. Why? Well, for me at the time, like, it was, I was making YouTube videos, and a lot of people
Starting point is 00:50:45 were kind of doing the same thing. So that felt like the only way that I can stand out is if I do things sort of my way. put my like kind of flare on it or whatever. I didn't want to and the things that other people were doing felt lazy to me. So I was like, I'm not going to do that. I'll do some other stuff. I'll, you know, experimental. I mean, by the way, whatever I tried to do sucked besides the point. But my thought was like, if I can stay authentic to my voice, then I'll stand out because there's only one of me and there's only one of you. And I think that's true for anybody. Like that ultimately is the goal. There, When you see something new, it's exciting.
Starting point is 00:51:26 You know, like when a new thing drops people, it's a brand new thing, we haven't seen it before. So if you are authentic and you sort of are placed on a platform or in a, you know, a medium like this or something and you're as authentic as you can be, you're going to stand out because guess what? There's a lot of other people that are just trying to be like the other ones who are already successful. That is so fucking good. That's really, really good.
Starting point is 00:51:49 No one can beat you at being you. No. Right? But the problem is... It's the easiest job. To just be you. That's it. No one can beat you at being you, but a lot of people are trying to be someone else.
Starting point is 00:52:01 Yes. And maybe that is because of some sort of insecurity and there's other stuff to impact there. But like, if you can get to a place where you're okay with yourself and you know yourself and you can apply that into... I mean, for me, I'm specifically talking about like content creation and, you know, that sort of thing. But if you can do that, uh, I think that that... pays dividends in my field, like what I do. Like, I think that makes you stand apart from everyone else. Because if you are trying to dress and sound and make videos that look at, like, if you're trying to make the same videos as Mr. Beast, like, what do you think that? You're just going to be Mr. Beast?
Starting point is 00:52:39 Like, it already exists and he's the guy. And he has a specific formula. I think he also says a lot of like smart things about like how to create viral moments and he actually gives really good advice in those ways. But thinking that you're going to make it because you're just going to copy him, I think it will hurt you ultimately. You know what the interesting thing with that is? I've met Jimmy once for two minutes, so I don't really know him. Let's say that Mr. Beast isn't being Mr. Beast. Let's say that he's performing in some way. His insecurity is driving him. Let's just say that that's the case. Regardless of whether he's being authentic or not, you trying to be him still won't work. Right.
Starting point is 00:53:17 which is the interesting thing, right? Even if you try to model someone who's being authentic, which not many people are, by definition, that still won't work because it's still inauthentic to you. Now, there's things that you can learn. It's not as if you learned how to video a podcast or put together a live show without taking inspiration. You said that you watched Ben Affleck and Matt Damon get this thing. And they've got ways of speaking and ways of working and they've got a philosophy behind things. Oh, I love what they did with Goodwill Hunting and I love the way this thing, but I don't really like that so much. And then you take it and it becomes a part of you as opposed to you trying to be it.
Starting point is 00:53:53 Yeah. But yeah, just the authenticity as the biggest competitive advantage you have, I think is a really interesting idea. I really do think that's true. And I also, I'm not trying to like, I'm not, I'm not even trying to be the best. I'm just trying to, like, be, like, me with learning more, like with taking something from, Like, anytime we've had conversations and, you know, we get into these types of discussions, like, I can take some stuff from there. So I can take things from you and be like, well, I'm taking that and I'm keeping it.
Starting point is 00:54:28 Like, but in order to do that, I think that you have to be at a certain place with yourself where you're willing to tell yourself that you're wrong. You could think something so much and then you have an argument with someone. And it's very hard to be like, oh, fuck, I'm wrong. That person's right. And completely change your point of view. I like to think sometimes I can do that and that helps tremendously. Like I really think that everyone has something to offer. Like everybody has something that will help you, whether it be, and it could come in the form of like horrible advice.
Starting point is 00:55:02 And then like that's also helpful. I don't want to do that. Exactly. But you can learn from everyone. But making it, I think it's a mistake to only look at people that are like your heroes as they, the people you need to follow. There's a lot of people around you that you can get things from that are going to help you. People who don't know anything about your job or anything. Like my mom will say something that I'm like, huh, okay. And it doesn't, it's not always applied to
Starting point is 00:55:29 the job, but it's also like my life. My actual personality and the way that I approach life, the only way to grow is to completely, is to constantly admit when you're wrong. In my opinion, that feels like I try to take responsibility for everything that goes wrong in my life. I truly try to do that because that's what I can control. I can't really control
Starting point is 00:55:51 how other people are going to react or what's going to happen or whatever. But when something bad happens to you, to me, I think that there's an opportunity there when something bad happens to you where I can learn from this or I can take something from it
Starting point is 00:56:07 or I could just put up a wall and be like, wow, that person's fucked up. But like, what is your involvement in that. You know, like something, an easy example is if you're in a relationship and you get cheated on, it's like, well, what the fuck? Like, she's a whore. She's whatever. But like, what is your involvement actually? And I'm not saying that let's absolve her, you know, shouldn't have fucked Steve for sure. But like, what could you get from that situation? Are you capable of getting to the point of like, even though that I was the safest option and I was taking care of her and I was nice to her,
Starting point is 00:56:37 I never cheated on her. I never scream at her. I clean the house and I do whatever. Maybe you're boring, though. And that's fine. Or maybe you picked wrong. Or that too. Maybe you weren't discerning in who you chose.
Starting point is 00:56:48 Sure. But like, it's on you in some capacity. Because even if you are, let's say, like, a boring guy or it's like super vanilla and it feels like every day is predictable and whatever and she got bored, it's okay, to admit that like, okay, that's something that happened to me. It doesn't mean that you have to change because if you don't. don't want to, you don't have to. But at least know your involvement while still, you can still go like, fuck you? But then you have to move on with your life. I'm going to learn from it as well.
Starting point is 00:57:18 It already happened. Like there's no reason to not think about it and get something from it. I've learned from over a thousand podcast episodes that the easier you make your health routine, the more consistent you'll be. It's like golf, right? You want to keep it simple and not mix a bunch of pills. You want the eye of the tiger, not the DUI of the tiger. That's why I'm such a huge fan of AG1. One scoop contains 75 vitamins, minerals, probiotics and whole food sourced ingredients in a single daily drink. And now they've taken it a step further with AG1 next gen, backed by four clinical trials. And in those trials, it was shown to fill common nutrient gaps, improve key nutrient levels in just three months, and increase healthy gut bacteria by 10 times, even in people who
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Starting point is 00:58:14 that includes a bottle of D3K2, an AG1 flavor sampler, and that 90-day money-back guarantee by going to the link in the description below. I heading to drinkag1.com slash modern wisdom. You know one of the reasons I think that people get angry and defensive in situations like that? It's not just that they've been wronged or this situation was hard and there's all of these emotions going around as well.
Starting point is 00:58:36 It's that they know if they did a little bit of self or a lot of self-reflection. They made a mistake too. And just blaming the other person and doing the fuck you thing. Yeah. Allows you to hide. It gives you distance from where you could have been responsible. Yeah. And I think that's the reason people would rather get angry at someone else than get angry at themselves.
Starting point is 00:59:01 And a lot of the time we have betrayed ourselves in situations. You have. It's like, you know, maybe I should have fucking paid a little bit more attention. Maybe I should have seen the red flags earlier. Maybe I should have heeded the advice from my business partner with that deal or whatever it might be. That doesn't mean that you're a bad person. Not at all. It doesn't mean that you're less than or irredeemable or that things are broken.
Starting point is 00:59:25 But it does mean that you've got something to learn. And kind of like if you're robbing yourself of the opportunity, to learn that thing, it's already shit. You might as well try and get something good out of it. That's why, like, everyone looks back at them like, well, I don't know about everyone. I know how you did in school, but like a lot of people that I know have like looked back
Starting point is 00:59:45 in like high school or whatever, he'd be like, bro, I wish I like tried harder because then I could, you know, blah, blah, blah. It's sort of like one of those things where it's like you're already presented the situation, the bad thing already happened. What can you get from it? Because you could walk away with something
Starting point is 01:00:00 that could help you. And even if you've done the work and there's a realization of like, you know what, I'm just not responsible. That's okay too. That's also a takeaway, which is a lesson for you to take. But if you don't do the self-assessment, you know the word that's come into mind as you say it, alchemy, like turning something that's kind of useless and shitty into something that's really valuable. And sometimes what you have in the beginning versus what you get out is like way smaller. But this was already shitty. Yeah. So you might as well try and work a little bit of alchemy on this thing to convert it into something that's a little bit more. more beautiful. Yeah. I mean, I feel that way about everything. I mean, every single time, like, you know, me and Greg work creatively in a lot of different projects. And I think that we're very capable people. I mean, I just talked to all that shit that I could do anything. But I, we've run into massive roadblocks where people are like, no, but that's good. Because it's like,
Starting point is 01:00:54 and it's funny, because it's like, we were really confident about that. Then we got her ass whooped. But that's where I like to be because, you know, this sounds so corny and it's like overset in so many ways. But it's just very true that like when you do fail and when you get your ass whooped, there's, it's good because you just closed a possible door. And now you have less doors to choose from. Like there's more of a chance of it happening now because you just learned something. Someone slam the door in your face. Turn around. There's other ones.
Starting point is 01:01:26 You know, like, and you can learn from that. And most of the time, especially with creative projects, you will get advice on why it did not work or why it's not good. And you try to find a reason. Like, okay, I'm okay with it being wrong. I don't need to defend this thing. And I don't need to be like 100% right. Like, no, fuck you. This is a good script or whatever.
Starting point is 01:01:44 Like find out why it's bad. Find out why it's bad. And then like if you really care about that thing, you will find those answers. Or else you're just going to keep making the same mistake over and over. Or you won't make another thing ever again. keep holding and being like, no, I swear to God, this thing's going to get Greenland. And you're like, dude. Oh, it's the guy, if coach had only put me in, then I would have got my NFL contract.
Starting point is 01:02:05 If I didn't blow out of my knee. If I didn't blow out my knee. But if you keep running around Austin Lake, you'll be fine. Dude. You mentioned your mum a bunch. Yeah. You're still super close with your mom, right? Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 01:02:18 Millennials and Gen Z are basically cutting off their boomer parents at record rates and calling it healing. You know? Yeah. What do you think about that? Like families never felt more optional, and I think that's worth interrogating. That's crazy. You know, I don't know if I have a unique or niche. Abnormally good relationship.
Starting point is 01:02:47 Yeah. So, like, I think I'm probably in a minority, but I'm very close with my family. And, you know, like, there's just like conversations. Like my financial advisor has like said stuff, like sometimes being like, oh, just, you know, a lot of people like you got to, when you're doing the will or you're doing whatever, like, you should be careful because a lot of people like, my family has never asked me for anything. They're only supportive people, especially my mother has never asked me for anything. No one has ever asked me for anything. Like even my friends, like they're just supportive. And they're not supportive in the way that they're going to show up with their face painted and shit. But they'll, they'll be supportive. Uh, you know, I don't know what I'm doing that would call for that anyway, to be fair. But that would be nice for them to show up while I'm recording a podcast and just staying in the corner. But yeah, my family, I'm very close to them. I can't imagine that.
Starting point is 01:03:39 When I see things like online or you see it like in a movie sometimes or you kind of hear it that like someone has a brother that they don't talk to. I'm like, that's outrageous. Like I would never let that fly. Like I would fly across the world and kick my sister's door in and be like, you're going to fuck. and sit here and talk to me and we're going to figure this thing out. You know, like, that's how we deal with issues. Like, there's issues. Home invasion.
Starting point is 01:04:07 Yeah. Kidnapping. Whatever I have to do, really. I can do anything. I kidnap. But I, yeah, like, that's how we kind of deal with problems. When there's something going on or whatever, like, no one talks shit behind people's backs in my family.
Starting point is 01:04:19 It's like, you're going to hear it because it's going to come out right now. And then it usually just results in, like, a very easy thing that you can kind of get over. There's rarely a long-lasting under-the-table grudge or anything like that. Because someone would just call it out. It's like, what, you fucking still mad? Like, it'll just, you know, like, it's just kind of like that. We were all just like very close. That is the most queen's approach to something.
Starting point is 01:04:44 What are you fucking stole mad? The fuck. But my mom, like, my mom is great. Both my parents are great. My father lives in North Carolina now. and my mom is in New York. So there was an age where I think, you know, I don't want to speak for parents because I don't have children,
Starting point is 01:05:08 but I think that there's probably, in my life it was important that my mom is my mom. She's always my mom, and we can't be friends. But there was a shift in she stopped trying to be like this mother that's going to make decisions for me. You know, like... What age did that happen? I don't even... I can't really pinpoint it. I would say it's probably younger than...
Starting point is 01:05:36 When did you notice it? Oh, I didn't notice it until like... Maybe five, six years ago. That was something like meant a lot to me. You'd just been allowed to freewheel at some point in the past and I didn't notice it. Yeah, like, just giving me the space to make mistakes and probably do things that she wouldn't do. And like, she knows I'm about to do them and just kind of like, all right, you know? And there's a trust in that.
Starting point is 01:05:57 She doesn't look at me with like, alright, good luck, idiot. it's kind of like there's there's a trust that I'm going to let you be creative like you have to let your children kind of like be who they are like you can't make the same kid over and over again where it's like this is how you raise a child they do this you have to do that this one has to do that too and whatever like children are very different obviously and I think that if people you know maybe this one's really creative this one's really into whatever and this one's really into that and you kind of have to notice those things and let them do that and I really believe that my my mother's specifically because in the years where I started to realize what was going on,
Starting point is 01:06:34 we kind of had that relationship where it felt like her guard came down a little bit as a mother and she like let me into her life a little more. So I was like able to let her into it. And then it felt more friendly. But she always says she's like, we can't be friends though. She always says that. Interesting. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:50 Yeah. I suppose that's so I'm thinking about what that moment must be like for parents. You know, because you've raised this kid. for me, I'm an only child, right? So it's even more fucking pressure, even more vigilance, even more everything. The entire genetic lineage rests on the fucking shoulders, this one guy who's still childless.
Starting point is 01:07:13 And they let you out into the world, and they've spent all of this time keeping you alive and raising you and wiping your ass and then still wiping your ass when you're an adult, just metaphorically. And now you're out there. And then at some point, they need to go, I actually think either, I don't know if he's good without me, but I'm going to let him make mistakes,
Starting point is 01:07:37 or I think he's good without me, and I'm not needed anymore. Right. And both of those situations, the first one, the first one's probably even harder because the compulsion to step in, to, if you watch your kid run toward a table with a sharp edge, you go, and I pick them up. And at 19 as you're about to make your first investment, or at 23 as you're about to get into a long-term, long-distance relationship with someone that your mum knows is bad for you. There's always a, oh, I'll pick you up and stop you from banging your head on the table.
Starting point is 01:08:11 Right. There's always that impulse. Yeah. And at some point, you need to go, I think he can handle the head bang. Yeah. And I think it's actually good for him to learn from it. But that must be, those two things must be really, really fucking. on for parents. I imagine like that would be, and I'm sitting here as a person who tries to
Starting point is 01:08:32 control every single part of his fucking life that when I have children, I'm going to be like, yeah, yeah, sure. Go ahead. Do it. I'm fine. Like I, you know, that's probably much easier said than done. Yeah, I mean, that's impossible. I can't even imagine, like, having a child and feeling like I'm completely responsible for this thing's life. And then it's going to come to a certain point where you have to just completely walk away and be like, I am no longer the coping mechanism. You're not in charge. Because then it becomes enabling in a way.
Starting point is 01:09:07 Or you're like hindering your child by being like, I'm always going to be there for it. It's like they have to feel a little alone. Like their decisions are like on them and they have to deal with the repercussions. You can't fix everything, obviously. But yeah, I don't know. That's why a lot of people shit talk university.
Starting point is 01:09:26 I'm friends with guys that are largely self-taught in a lot of different things. They went to university for a thing and then have found success doing the opposite thing. And the lesson that they've taken away from that is university's bullshit and with the internet, especially now AI. You can teach yourself anything you want, way faster pace and follow your passions and change and all the rest of it. But I think one of the biggest takeaways from going to uni for me, I was at uni for five years and then stayed in the same city for another eight, was moving out of the house and living on your own with other people that you kind of thrust into this situation.
Starting point is 01:10:08 You just need to make it work unless you stop, obviously. But for the most part, stuff still on a set of train tracks, as opposed to, I'm going to move in with my friends and then quickly going to stop. There's more guardrails. It's like, well, I'm here for a purpose. And if I don't like this halls of residence, I can just go to the hall manager and say, I want to move to a different flat.
Starting point is 01:10:25 Like, there's a degree of support there. What it teaches you is, okay, I actually, both the parents and the kids are kind of, it's another umbilical separation, right? It's another cutting of that cord. And this time it's geographically, a little bit. Sometimes it's far. But that, I think, can be really important. I certainly know for me, only child, very inconsistent.
Starting point is 01:10:50 quite introverted family life, that was a huge changing point. Like I grew up at my level of socialization and understanding of the world like tripled by the time I was 21 from 18. It was insane. It's the same reason why it's like important to put very young children in school at like in like pre-K or something. It's like they learn socialization. It's kind of the same, but on a different level, obviously, like going to college and like now you're on your own, you're around a bunch of kids and you're going to be like living by yourself for the first time and, you know, for all the reasons that you just said. But it's funny how that like kind of comes around again.
Starting point is 01:11:29 Dude, I saw this tweet earlier on today. You're not autistic. You just work from home and it's making you weird. I wonder if I can use the fact that I'm an only child as an excuse. Dude, I'll tell you, when I was, when I moved into my first real apartment, because I had an apartment that I just like film stuff at and it wasn't really like a real apartment. But then my first real apartment when I moved to do that one, I felt so weird. Like, it felt like I'm never, I bought like a little bench and some weights and stuff. And then I quickly threw that out because I was like, I need to get a gym membership. Well, yeah. Well, then I was like, I got to, I was like, I got to leave this apartment. Because I'm working here. I live here. Now I'm going to work out here.
Starting point is 01:12:13 I'm not leaving here. Like, I'm not leaving. Like, I'm nuts. I'm like walking around and I'm, you know, whatever. It was just, it's so bad to do that. I got a gym membership. but a place like a half an hour away just so I can like drive and go there. We got to talk about that insight that we came up with last night, that if you're a guy who doesn't have a girlfriend in the house after 7 p.m., you kind of go a bit insane. Dude. What do you do?
Starting point is 01:12:37 I could tell you I have a friend who is single and lives on his own now, and I just get like random headstand pictures. I'm like, are you doing headstands? like what are you doing? You're stretching? Like, it's 8.30. What are you stretching for? You're getting, like, how hard do you go to bed? Like, it's time for sleep soon. Like, what are you doing? Like, it's like random things like that. I think I asked him recently. I was like, what do you do all day? He's a very busy guy. I don't want to take away, but, like, during those hours, it's like, how do you entertain yourself? Because at this point, I don't know how to do that when, like, my fiance leaves. I'm, I'm kind of like, what the hell do I do now? Like, there's no one here. Like, I just kind of like walk around. I like clean shit.
Starting point is 01:13:28 And then I just like, there's not much to do. Like, I'm like, oh, this is kind of boring. Am I going to go for a walk? I don't know. You find yourself building weird hobbies. So I was leaving the house last night to go to dinner with you because you're an insane person and decided to have dinner at 7.30 p.m. Which for me is like, is that not fucking late? What are we talking about?
Starting point is 01:13:47 That's pretty fucking late. Is this an Austin thing? That's not late. That's fucking... 730's late? Okay, we're split 50-50 in the room. 7.30? Yeah, well, you was on fucking...
Starting point is 01:13:58 That's 8.30. So I'm leaving the house, and his girlfriend's in Costa Rica. And he looks at me, and he looked really sad. And he came up, and he whispered, and he was like, I don't know what to do. I said, where are you going? I don't know what to do. Like, puppy dog eyes, it's like, I don't know what to do. I'm like, George, it's fine.
Starting point is 01:14:16 I don't know what you'll read stuff or whatever. and I got back and he'd written all of this stuff and he had post-it notes everywhere. So he'd done, he was doing headstands. Yeah. He'd done his equivalent of doing headstands. Yeah. And then at 10.30 p.m., just 11 o'clock after I got back from dinner, I must have heard him sneeze 15 times in a row.
Starting point is 01:14:39 What the hell was he doing? Fucking 15 times in a row. This is agitating to me. Yeah. How annoying must that be if you're the sort of put, what's the most number of times that you've ever sneezed in a row? I've never gotten close to 15. I think you die if you do, though.
Starting point is 01:14:55 I think I've done like five good ones, and then everyone tells you to shut the fuck up. You get two sneezes. 15. Bro, 15, I mean, I'm kicking this guy out of my house. Get the fuck out. I know you wrote those post-it notes earlier on and you've been lonely tonight,
Starting point is 01:15:09 but it does not excuse you sneezing 15 times. 15's crazy. Is he dead? Actually, I haven't seen him today, maybe. Yeah, he's probably dead, dude. You should probably check on him. Doesn't it? There was like an old, like, thing.
Starting point is 01:15:20 it's like if you sneeze your heart stops, I'm like, 15. Ask chat GPT. If you sneeze, does your heart stop? Or something like that. Fucking wait for this. The AI is going to be like, what idiot acts that question? No. What does happen is sneezing briefly changes the pressure inside your chest, that pressure
Starting point is 01:15:39 change can slightly affect blood flow momentarily alter your heart rhythm, which is why some people feel like the heart skip's a beep at heart drop. So he's altering his blood flow like crazy in there. But the worst thing was, I thought he was over. and then there would be a 30 second break. And then it would come back. I'm like, fucking, what? Oh, is he like a loud?
Starting point is 01:15:58 He's a real loud one. I honestly, I would prefer that. I hate people who sneeze like inside their bodies. It scares me, dude. I'm like, yo, you're going to hurt your neck or something. Like, your eyes are going to explode out of your head, like, chill. Like, I have a friend that does that. I'm like, yo, just open your mouth.
Starting point is 01:16:17 Like, just it comes out. All of this can be fixed. It just comes out naturally if you just like, let your lips flap. Do you think... Poof. I wonder if there's a personality trait, if there's a commonality between the sort of people who keep the sneeze in. Oh, man. What is?
Starting point is 01:16:36 I mean, it's not really like a learned thing, I guess. You just kind of like... It's weird when you're driving. I get scared when I'm driving. Bro, first of all, you want to talk about that. My dad, by the way, I'm convinced he's allergic to the son. I don't know what's going on. But sometimes he would drive me.
Starting point is 01:16:49 to school when I was in high school. We would get in the car. First thing he does is before he starts the car, he would take his key and clean out his ears with the key, right? Is this just the guy he is? I don't know that, and he's deaf. He's not deaf, but he might as well be. He's fucking definitely deaf after sticking the car key in his ear.
Starting point is 01:17:10 If he went to the doctor, they'd be like, you're deaf. Because he can't hear. But he's been shoving car keys in his ears like that. Then he would start the car, right? That would take 10 minutes. It's because it's a, you know, it's a completely fucked up minivan. And then we would be driving on the highway and he would let off 10 on the highway. We're going 60, 70, and he's sneezing.
Starting point is 01:17:33 And I'm looking at him like, my guy, we're drifting. Okay? We're not in a middle lane right now. Like, we're on the highway. You got to chill the fuck out. And this, so I was scared for my life mostly when I was going to high school because of that. Yeah. And there was a time where he used to drive around in a, like a work van because he was like a, he worked construction.
Starting point is 01:17:58 He would throw us in the back. There wasn't any seats back there. It was just me and my brother. Yeah, yeah. And there's tools. There's, you know, two by fours and wood. There's a saw. Brick in a washing machine.
Starting point is 01:18:11 Yeah, there's like a fucking mitresole there. And I'm like, I'm sitting on the edge of the mitresole hoping that he doesn't hit the brakes because the thing's going to go right to my spine. but this is like what he would do and I really believe that he's allergic to the son like he's an interesting guy his whole tooth came out one time the entire tooth the entire tooth
Starting point is 01:18:28 like if you Google cartoon tooth like the ones on commercials that have like a toothbrush and dance they got like the fangs or whatever that came out of his mouth how does that even happen to a person when what was he doing
Starting point is 01:18:41 sleeping he wasn't even chewing gum he wasn't doing anything he just popped out of his mouth you know what you should have done head stuns before he went to bed. I went to church. I prayed. Headstand.
Starting point is 01:18:52 Yeah, no, he's not doing a headstand. Not now. That's how hard he sleeps. Dude, his tooth popped out in his sleep, which is insane. And then he just like, usually when that happens... He must grind his teeth. He's got to grind his teeth. He's got to be.
Starting point is 01:19:03 Bro, I mean... It's either that or the same demons that got Tucker Carlson in his sleep. How strong is his jaw? Is it like the fucking gorilla's jaw? Or someone walking in there and hitting him with a bat in the map? Over a bunch of yours, I think you can pretty easily, like, crack a tooth by grinding your teeth. But the tooth, was intact. It was a tooth. It was just
Starting point is 01:19:20 a tooth. I'm looking at a tooth. Actually, yeah. Like, it just, his body was just like... Was it a molar? Front tooth? I'm not a dentist. I don't know if it was a molar. It was in scissor, whatever the fuck that shit is called. I have no idea. What is that going to
Starting point is 01:19:34 do for you also? Knowing which tooth it was. Which tooth was it? Oh, okay. Makes so much more sense. It wasn't one of his front tooth, though. Like, you could hide it. It was one of the back ones. Maybe it was a molar. But it popped out, and usually you're like, oh shit, I should go to the dentist because I'm probably dying. That's what I would think.
Starting point is 01:19:52 And then he just put it in his sock drawer and he went back to sleep. And then we never really talked about it until now. Now he's going to see this thing and he's going to remember like, yeah, your fucking tooth popped up. Yeah. Oh, shit. I need to get that out of my sock drawer and put it back in. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Where is that thing? We kept it though. We kept it. My parents used to keep our teeth. Your parents do that? Is that an American thing or British thing? I think that's a British thing. You kept your teeth? Well, yeah, because our teeth look like cigarettes. Yeah, yeah, you guys have crazy teeth. Bro, it's crazy how some of the, like, the stereotypes, like, I heard someone from
Starting point is 01:20:26 someone from Europe was like, I saw a TikTok of being, like, walking around in American airport, and it's like, this is, like, insane. Like, everyone just, like, looks what you think in America was like an overweight person with shake shack and their hand or something like that. But then the UK thing is like, oh, they got bad teeth and beans on toast or whatever. First all, beans on toast, low key, I like it. High key. High key though Teeth are Not good
Starting point is 01:20:50 Not that I have the best teeth in the world either But they got some stuff going on over there for sure What is that? Is that just like I don't know We've got nationalized health care So I think the fact that You can get The number one reason for bankruptcy in America
Starting point is 01:21:04 Is medical bills is fucking insane But Just don't pay it Easy, boom, not paying it I think that's how you go bankrupt I'm not but you're not getting the money from me. Where are you getting it? But then do they not come and take stuff
Starting point is 01:21:20 from you? Like your house? And your dog? My dog? People are getting murdered if they try to take my dog, dude. The shock on blast is coming through the fucking door. You're not even going to get in here. Okay. I can see the diplomacy that has gotten you through your career so far. Between kidnapping your sister and kicking a door down and... It's passion. It's just passion. Yeah, dude. It's my passion. It's my ambition without direction.
Starting point is 01:21:43 Yeah, yeah. When I've got an Academy Award, I can shoot everybody I want in the face. No, no, no, no. I mean, yeah, some of the medical bills are just insane. But the dental thing I don't get because we have free dental. Yeah. So everybody goes to get their teeth looked after. Maybe the dentist in the UK are not good. I don't know. There'll be a dentist listening that'll say, well, actually, it's because of, maybe it's just, you know, just where you are in the world. I have no idea. Shit weather gives you bad teeth. I don't know. It's something.
Starting point is 01:22:08 Some fucking weird. Jared, you ever considered that you might have a drinking problem? I don't consider a lot, Chris. Well, you drank an entire case of Athletic Brewing Co last night. But they're non-alcoholic. And that's not a problem? Sorry, man, I just kept chugging wait for the regret to creep in. Never happen.
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Starting point is 01:22:59 using the code, modern wisdom, a checkout. That's athletic brewing.com slash modern wisdom and modern wisdom at checkout. Near beer, terms and conditions apply athletic brewing company fit for all times. Bottoms up. All right, so you said you've got these sort of two sides of your brain that are working, and you've got the business side, and then you've got the creativity side. How do you protect the creative side of your brain when the business side never stops demanding attention? Fortunately for me, I don't really need to do that. You did for a long time.
Starting point is 01:23:37 What? You did have to do both of those things. No, no, I'm saying I don't have to separate them. Okay. Like, I can be creative, and that helps my... business. I'm not good at multitasking. So like if I, like if I'm, as much as I will be like, I'm listening when I'm texting someone and someone's talking to me, I can't, I can't even hear anything. And I have this thing too with like noise. Like I think it's called misophonia,
Starting point is 01:24:02 but it's like if there's like a couple of sounds going on, I just can't. I'm so distracted. That's me too. I can't read unless it's like, huh? I just thought. Yeah. I thought that was being an only, being an autistic only child again. It could be. I don't know. But I mean, So when there's noises going on, you're super easily distracted and you can't focus? It would really bother, like, certain noises, like, really bother me. Not certain specific noises, but when they're, like, if the TV is on and someone's phone is playing, like, a video really loud, like, I can't even focus. Or if I'm watching a movie and the AC is on even, I, like, I got to shut it off.
Starting point is 01:24:37 Like, I can't. Like, I just can't, like, focus. The reason why I say that is because if I had to separate those two things, I don't really think I could. I have worked normal jobs before, obviously, and once the, like, the creative thing is so intense with me that there are times where I had an idea one time for an app. I don't even know what's going on. I don't know why. I didn't actually want to do it, but sometimes when I, an ideal will pop into my head, and I have to flush it out right now. And I sent it to Greg, and he was like, this is the dumbest thing I've ever seen. And I was like, yeah, I just needed to get it off. But I was driving to the gym,
Starting point is 01:25:13 and I had this idea and I was like, ooh, that sounds like a good idea. Like, I'm going to start whatever. And I was like in my car doing it. And then I got so distracted, I have to go home so that I could finish this. So I left and I went home. And I didn't even get into the gym.
Starting point is 01:25:27 I just turned my car around and went home. And I typed this whole thing out and I was like, yeah, and I sent it to Greg. And I was like, what do you think about this? He's like, so stupid. And I'm like, cool, I'm going to the gym. Go back to the gym. But that's how intense it is for me.
Starting point is 01:25:38 Like, I can't multitask and feel like once I'm creatively inspired by something, like it has to happen now. Like there are so many times where I don't know how this happens, but I'll wake up first thing and write like a joke or something. I wrote most of my set for MSG that I did at MSG at that time. Like waking up and being like, oh, I don't even know what that's about. Because it wasn't necessarily about my dream. Okay.
Starting point is 01:26:04 So the line between sleeping and waking, I can give you at least a bit of signs that might explain it. Oh, love this. So the brainwave that you want to get, into when you're in flow state is one step away from what you're in when you're sleeping. So a lot of engineers throughout history would, a Nobel Prize winners, would sit on seats with ball bearings or something metal in their hand over a plate. And they'd be thinking about an idea, but they'd be relaxing and they'd have their eyes closed. And as they were drifting off
Starting point is 01:26:38 and drifting off and drifting off. And then their hand would open as they fell asleep. And they'd drop the loud thing into the plate and it would clang and then they would get up to try and work on the problem. Fucking no way. Yeah. That makes so much sense. That's how a bunch of the biggest problems in science have been solved. What?
Starting point is 01:26:58 Yeah. Damn, I'm going to start paying attention in the fucking morning now. Well, there's another light. So the guys from Flow Research Collective who work on the science of flow, they try to engineer people to get into flow states more easily. The number one hack, the easiest hack for anybody to get into flow. begin working within 30 seconds of waking up. Dude, that is fascinating to me.
Starting point is 01:27:17 Because that's literally like, I had no explanation for it. Because I don't even remember the dream that I had, but I woke up and I immediately had, like, a joke? Like, I don't, like, I, but I would write it down. Do you think you'd have gone to bed thinking about maybe something to do with MSG? Like, it would have been a part of your evening? Maybe.
Starting point is 01:27:34 Or it's just in the back of your, well, you care about it. What you're doing is you're allowing your subconscious to come through at least a little bit. But yeah, that line between sleeping and waking, if you're struggling with an idea. I mean, that's why people say it's, all the cliches are kind of true, which is sleep on it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:48 Sleep on it, sleep on it. See how you feel in the morning. And a lot of the time, you've consolidated your memories and your thoughts from yesterday, last night, and now it's the morning, and you've kind of got it in a new perspective.
Starting point is 01:28:00 There you go. Wow. You're using science, dude. Honestly, that is fascinating. I'm stealing that. Take it. Take it. Put it in the park.
Starting point is 01:28:07 Wasn't going to ask? There's a line that I fucking love which is you can't white-knuckle creativity. I think when you try and force it, it almost never comes out. Your best ideas, your best jokes. Have you ever, can you ever remember a time when you've tried to really force a piece of creativity
Starting point is 01:28:27 and it's come through? Because for me, it never happens. It's like an erection. How do you try for it, the more it runs away? Runs away. It does run away from you. It's a good metaphor. Yeah, I am horrible at that,
Starting point is 01:28:41 especially like it's like okay I'm going to set aside time and I'm going to do this thing I can't do it without someone's help I think that Greg's probably better at that because we work like creatively in a lot of things but he's he's also very good at like prompting me like if I can get a prompt or I can get like a something like a seed of an idea then I'm I'm in and I can we can start doing this right now but for me to go from zero to a creative thought like that's always been very difficult for me. Riffing is significantly easier. Insanely. Yeah. Insanely. Yeah, that is better. I have never been in a writer's room, really, for much. But for Newtonic, we do skits and sketches and stuff for the different ads and new flavor releases and things like that.
Starting point is 01:29:29 And then we've done some for my tour announcements. And I didn't realize that what we were doing was sitting in a writer's room, right? I'm aware that this has been done for, like, fucking 100 years. and people realize that if you come in with an idea and you have a bunch of people who are all working on the same thing at the same time, you go, why don't we, no, no. Well, what if we, and you bounce that around,
Starting point is 01:29:49 but it doesn't just need to be constrained to people that are making movies. Right. It can be anybody in a team. Okay, let's just come in with some ideas and talk about what the fuck's going on. And if you've got one person that's at least a bit diligent, the person who's got a shit ton of creativity
Starting point is 01:30:07 kind of gets jumping off points. I don't know about you, but I get really excitable, enthusiastic when stuff like that, I'm like, ooh, oh, yeah, yeah. And then, but it does need that, and it's like rolling a boulder down a hill just needs that push at the start.
Starting point is 01:30:22 I'm really bad at pushing it. I'm really fucking good at rolling down a hill. Yeah, and sometimes all it takes is a question or like, even the worst idea I've ever heard to be like, no, this. Like, it's like, I just can't go from zero to 100. Like, no, it's zero to one. Zero to one.
Starting point is 01:30:39 Yeah, definitely. And then one to 100, piece piss. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Like, it's just, it's one of those things that, like, I just need to be sort of prompted or whatever because I, I can, like, kind of put things off. And part of that, I think is kind of, like, I, when there's pressure, I feel like I can perform. And I, like, if there's pressure, like, I'd rather that be on me because I feel like, okay, we're going to live. I can live and die by, like, my decisions or whatever. But I just need that, like, that little push.
Starting point is 01:31:16 Like, if it's up to me, like, it's all through school or whatever, like, I'm up the night before, like, finishing things and whatever. Like, I can't get ahead of it because, I don't know. Like, I mean, I think this is a horrible, like, way to be. Like, you could stack things and kind of get ahead on those things. Like, now it's different. I mean, professionally, it's a little easy. to like I've I've had a lot of practice but it's not natural to me I've had to work at it like very like I've had to work on it a lot to get to the point where I can come up with like ideas out of thin air I would say an overwhelming majority of any sort of creative decision or thing that I've ever made in my life has come at like out of nowhere like it kind of just enters your brain but if we're like having a conversation about. you know, we're doing the new tour at the end of the year.
Starting point is 01:32:11 And it's like, well, we have to create a brand new show. And I won't just do that. I have to have Greg be like, so we need a new show. Here's what I was thinking, like an idea. Like, hey, what do you think about this as an idea? And then magically I'll have four ideas. And then I'll be able to be like, okay, you know, whatever. like I need like that is where I it like unlocks ideas that are probably in there but I can't
Starting point is 01:32:43 start the conversation for some reason also Greg and and Frank love to say that well everyone they love to say that like there is sometimes they'll have an idea and then a week later I'll say their idea and act like it's mine and they're like oh yeah no no one said that no big deal I'm like wait someone to say that because I'm like when someone says that because I'm like when someone says something, I'm like, okay, I'm like really taking it in and I can't do two things at once. So I'm like walking around with it and not actively thinking about it, but like it's there. So by the time it comes back, I've already forgotten the origin. And it's like, I've just been lost in the idea or something. And now it just comes out and people are like, yeah, fucking said that.
Starting point is 01:33:25 I'm like, okay. Sorry. It's a great idea. Sorry. Don't take yourself too seriously, but do take the work seriously. Absolutely. I mean, it's similar to what I was saying before where you have to be humble. Like, don't take yourself too seriously. I mean, especially me at the end of the day, like, the fuck am I doing? I'm like, you know, I'm not changing lives here. Like, I'm trying to be funny, trying to be entertaining.
Starting point is 01:33:49 I'm doing a podcast with my friend that I've known the longest. And I have like a very, you know, it's demanding, but like it's a fun job ultimately. And like my job is to have fun. And I do take it very seriously, especially at this point, because I think that a lot of people from what I've seen, like our fans, they get a lot from it. It helps them escape things. I don't necessarily feel that part because that's hard to imagine that I could be that for someone. Even though I can very much imagine other people being that for me, I can't imagine that.
Starting point is 01:34:28 So I take it very seriously because I want to earn it. I want to be good at something. I want other people in the space to respect the things that I've done in the approach and those sort of things. But at the same time, I'm not over here like, yeah, I'm changing the world or I'm doing whatever. And I don't know that I'll ever have that, to be honest with you. I mean, I just don't, I don't think that helps anybody to take yourself super seriously and act like, you know, just arrogant about their decisions. Like even when you get the thing that you've been working for for so long, like, now's not the time to be like, I fucking told you. Because that also feels like, did you do that in spite of someone?
Starting point is 01:35:13 Like, I'm not doing anything in spite of somebody or because I'm insecure and I need to appear a certain way to other people. Like, this is for me. I want to do it. And I enjoy doing it. So that's my motivation. Like, I'm trying to just enjoy my life. And I'm trying to help as many people as I can, truly. Like, that's truly what I'm trying to do.
Starting point is 01:35:32 That's it. And it's very simple. And I'm completely content in that. And I'll try to find new ways to do that. I believe that I can find new ways to do that. And that's it. And it's also very important for me to make sure that everyone is happy while we're doing it. Because our job is to have fun and to entertain other people.
Starting point is 01:35:57 But in order to do that, you need to be happy. Right. I can't have you be disgruntled. I can't have you feel like. And also, like my company, the things that, the way that I run things, like, you're not going to miss a birthday or you're not going to miss your, your marriage isn't going to go by the wayside because of me. Like, that's not going to happen. Like, we're, we're very flexible at what time. No one's late to shit that I have to do. Like, you can't be late to things. I mean, I was late today. But that was like a, that was a time zone thing. That wasn't like a respect thing. My eyes just kept getting wide. And wider. You were late, dude. But, like, I, like, no one could be, like, late for stuff. Like, we'll get it done, whatever. But, you know, there's people who have children. And it's like, you're there for the morning.
Starting point is 01:36:40 You're there for, you know, the evening. And we have a very loose, like, a work schedule. And I want that. I want there to be this balance. I do see my job as an extension of me, but it's a completely different part of my life. My personal life is very important to me. And I, and I truly, like, live a great life. I have a great social life and friends
Starting point is 01:37:03 and I like to go out and stuff like that. And I do enjoy my job as well, but it feels like two separate worlds in a way. It's rare. Mine does too. It's rare that I would get around people. Like, I really wouldn't enjoy, I don't think, hanging out with people and when I hang out with them,
Starting point is 01:37:21 we're always talking about podcasting or, you know, just something that I'm doing at work. Because I'd be like, bro, I just like, I'm just not interested in it that much, to be honest with you. Like, I'm interested in it when I'm doing it. I can't do it when I'm kind of like, we can acknowledge that I have a job that does that or whatever, but like I'm just not interested in it that much.
Starting point is 01:37:43 I don't really watch a lot of podcasts. I don't watch any real YouTubers or anything like that. It's just not what I'm into. Like, I just have like a normal life and I do this thing on the side. That's kind of like what it feels like. I always think about MMA fighters and kind of friends with a couple, but no one super, super high level. But if you were friends with fucking Sean Strickland or whatever, and actually Sean's a bad example, because he's an insane. Who's a really normal person that happens to be a super high level?
Starting point is 01:38:18 Dustin Porriot, yeah, perfect example. Or like Michael Chandler, someone like that, like just normal dudes that happened, like if they didn't wear things that showed off the fact that they're fucking animals. And then you're like, you're such a normal guy, except for this bit of your life. Right. And then in this one area, if I put you in a very specific situation, you're the most abnormal person on the planet. And I guess it's kind of a little, like fucking porn star something. You're like, hey, in this one scenario, things are kind of extreme. And outside of that, you're probably just a normal fucking dude.
Starting point is 01:38:51 Yeah. And it's like that much is obvious that, like, I'm not over here. here like, I'm just a normal guy. Like my life is not fucking outrageous or anything. But I, I, there is a definite feel of like these things are separate. And it's important for me to have that and to make sure that everyone is, has a flexible schedule. I think that's the ultimate dream, right?
Starting point is 01:39:13 You want to be able to, at least for me and the people that I've hired and keep around me is like, we want to be creative. We want to be able to see our families and have freedom to do certain things. And I also encourage anybody that works for me or does whatever to like, if you have your own creative thing that you want to do, I'm in full support of that. And if we can help in some sort of way, we will. And I just, my job is a lot easier if everyone's happy. So I try to keep people as happy as possible. Like, of course there's times we have to like sort of reel that in a little bit.
Starting point is 01:39:49 But for the most part, it's like this needs to be a good experience. When we go on tour, like we're not staying in like, like just this like the cheapest hotel where I'm trying to like book a really cool Airbnb or something that has like a pool and a cool view or whatever because I want people to feel like we're all going to look back on this thing in our life. This is not a normal thing. Like no one gets to do this. This is very abnormal. And I want people to look back on it and feel like that was such a great time in my life. Like I know that I will look back on some of those pictures and now we have all these memories attached to them. Not just. the fact that like, oh my God, that was so cool that we were able to do that when we were younger, but also like, oh, do you remember when we went and did this thing too? And when we were blah, blah, blah, like, we tried to go to all these cities and do something fun and try to get it on camera or like there's photos and things like that. Like I want it to be something that you can look back on like super fondly. You know what I mean? So that is very important to me.
Starting point is 01:40:49 I do enjoy being able to think about that, which is an absolute like luxury. that I even get to do that. Because a lot of people who are in charge of something, they can't. They have shareholders or whatever, and it's just about the numbers. It's just me. That's like that,
Starting point is 01:41:07 you know what I mean? So it's like I just have to make sure everyone's super happy and we're all being creative. How else do you think about engineering fun? A lot of people take their work seriously, but it can cause them to become quite rigid. It can cause everything to become, it can go from serious to stern, if that makes sense.
Starting point is 01:41:29 And they're not loose and flowy and not actually finding time to enjoy this process. They're very, very focused on the outcome, kind of the cost of getting there. How do you think about engineering fun? So it's not sternness when you're doing your work? I think that the only way it can become stern is if you're trying to like manufacture it. like if you're trying like we're going to have fun it's like fuck that's not how you do it you know like I'm happy right now I swear it's like you're not like do the things that make you happy like follow the
Starting point is 01:42:04 excitement like do those things if it doesn't resonate with you and it doesn't feel like in line with what you want to do even if it's good money or whatever like I will say no what's the biggest opportunity that you've ever turned down I mean I turned down doing the tour for a number of years because at that point a lot of people were like you could just go on stage and talk to each other and then you could make a bunch of money doing that. And I'm like, that's just not, no, that's not cool. Like, I'm not doing that. And I don't care.
Starting point is 01:42:29 Like, I don't care. There was a time, I remember specifically when I was doing YouTube, there was a brand deal that came in for $75,000. And what they wanted was for me to, and this was kind of abnormal at the time, to promote a phone game that was like something with zombies. I was like, what? But they wanted, which I was okay with doing, but I always did advertisements at the very end of my video. And that's the way I did things because I was like, the product needs to be there.
Starting point is 01:43:07 I mean, people are going to shut it off, but like, whatever, I'm going to stay true to that because I'm building something here. But they wanted me to put it in the first like 30 seconds or a minute, and that's why they were paying $75,000. And I was like, I'm not doing that. Like, I'm not doing that. and there's there's been other deals i mean it happens a lot there's there's been six figure
Starting point is 01:43:25 deals that i'm like no i'm not doing that because i don't want to do that because the brand wasn't aligned or it's like they just want me to do something that i'm not comfortable doing that i'm just like no like i won't why would i do that especially i'm almost um almost offended that and it used to be worse my agent one time i was i was uh i did this thing um with the rock right so they this is a good example actually with this. I got hit up through my email from The Rock's team and he was starting his YouTube channel at the time. This was a while ago and they were going to do this, this series called Rock the promo where they would have wrestlers kind of like as a guest host and then they would have like,
Starting point is 01:44:09 you know, just people who wanted to be whatever, they were like cut promos. They would like have a character. That's a good idea. Yeah. So that's, that was on the YouTube channel. They asked me to host it to be the guy that hosts and then does like color color commentary and I was like oh my god that's awesome they're like yeah it's the rock and like the finale you'll you'll be with him and you guys will do it together and I was like this is awesome and they're like yeah it's filming in LA and we'll need you there for like two weeks or whatever and I was like oh forget it no like I'm not doing that why because I didn't want to go to LA I I was making YouTube videos and I was doing my podcast at the time which wasn't like super successful or anything, but I, like, had a schedule, and I liked that, and I liked my
Starting point is 01:44:53 life. You're asking me to go there for two weeks. It also, at the time, didn't pay a lot, but that didn't really matter, because it could have been whatever. I mean, unless it was, like, life-changing, then I would have been like, all this, I'm going. Um, because I didn't have a lot of money at that time, but I was like, no, I can't, like, I'm not doing that. Apparently, he really wanted me to do it so they moved the recording to New York and we recorded it in New York. And then the part that's funny is like, that's what I'm saying. Like, it used to be worse. Because when someone tries to incentivize me with money, that bothers me like crazy. If like, like, you think that you could have bought me with that. It's like, all right, I want you to do this. And I'm like, I don't want to do
Starting point is 01:45:32 that. It's like, all right, what if we give you this money? It's like, what do you think of me that? That you can buy me into, like, I just said I don't want to do it. You know what I mean? Like, it won't be about the money. So in this situation, it was fun. It was. The thing that I hated also back then was like, you were going to a meeting and people start name dropping. Like, yeah, we work with this and this and this. And I'm like, I don't care. Why do I care? Like, let's talk about the thing that we're doing.
Starting point is 01:45:54 Is it going to be good? Can you be helpful or can I be helpful even? And on the set of, by the way, amazing thing with the Rock's team and I eventually met him. And, well, that's a cool story that I should tell you. But on set, the PA there was like saying something. and then she's like, oh, yeah, she like mentioned someone's name. And then she was like, oh, and I was like, what was that? She was like, oh, your agent was like, try not to name drop because that bothers you.
Starting point is 01:46:22 And I was like, oh, God, what have I done? I was like, what is this monster that I've created? Your reputation procedure. Yeah, I was like, oh, my God. I'm like, it's not that bad. I'm like, definitely not in this sort of situation because, you know, I was just happy to be there. But the rock dude was the nicest guy in my experience. Like, I hadn't had any back and forth with him at all during this thing.
Starting point is 01:46:47 And then the finale of this thing was filming in Vegas and he was going to be there. He was flying from Hawaii, filming one of the Jumanjis, I guess, and coming back, doing this thing, then going to host to Mr. Olympia, whatever the fuck, and then going back to Hawaii in one day. psychotic but on the way over to Vegas I'm like on the plane and I'm by myself so I'm like I'm just going to kill some time I'm going to write a sketch
Starting point is 01:47:18 and then I'm going to send it to his producer because I had his email and I'm like oh if the rock wants to be on my YouTube channel like here's you know whatever so I wrote this thing out and I sent it to his producer never heard anything but get to set and he shows up eventually
Starting point is 01:47:39 and everyone's like crowding him you know whatever and I'm kind of like I'm like nervous because I'm like okay I can't fuck this up like I had some lines that I had to whatever and I was like hosting this thing he comes up to me the nicest guy in the world
Starting point is 01:47:53 like we're boys like the guy by the end of the shoot like we were joking around in between takes the director's like all right fucking stop like he was kind of like that like come on we got a fucking we got time or whatever like we were just joking around the guy who was doing the lighting on the set
Starting point is 01:48:07 was like, how long have you guys known each other? I'm like, I just fucking met that guy. He's like, what? I would thought you guys were friends for years. Like, he was super nice to me. At the end of the shoot, he comes up to me and he goes, I know you sent that script, but, you know, and I was like, what the fuck is he talking about?
Starting point is 01:48:24 I had forgotten. I was already like, this is an amazing experience. So I was like, fuck is he talking about some script. And he's like, I can't do the script, but what do you say? We just like improv like a scene. And I was like, okay, and he's like, what do you want the scene to be? I was like, okay, why don't me just have like an argument that, you know, I wasn't your like, first or second choice to be host, and I'll just get offended by that.
Starting point is 01:48:45 And at the end, you'll just give me a rock bottom. And he was like, all right, cool. So then they turn the cameras on and we just improv to scene one take and I put it out. And like, there's a video on my YouTube channel where it's that. Can you get that up? I want to see you getting rock bottomed. If we could find it. It cuts in the middle.
Starting point is 01:49:01 I didn't like hit the deck. I would have liked to. I did get a diamond cutter though one time. What's that? From DDP Diamond Dallas page. He's like a wrestler and the job that me and Greg we met at, we used to work for this company Elite Daily, he came in
Starting point is 01:49:15 to shoot like a video and we all were just like, yo, can you give us a diamond cutter? Because there was like a pad that we had, so he was just diamond cutting everyone in the office. There he is. It was a different time. Don't judge the tightness of my pants. Hey, listen, man, I just want to thank you for doing such a great job.
Starting point is 01:49:33 I really appreciate being like your first round draft pick for this. It really, that means a lot to me. Oh, hey, no problem. I don't know first round. What if first round? You mean like my first choice? Yeah, my, yeah. Well, you weren't quite my first choice.
Starting point is 01:49:44 But hey. Wait, hold on. Time out, hold on, no, no, no. So I wasn't your first choice. So they lied to me. You guys lied to me, great. Because I was told I was first round. Who was first?
Starting point is 01:49:52 Hey, easy. It was Kevin Hart. I know you guys are like basically dating now. You're hanging out all the time on Instagram. Easy, calm down. Hey, but listen. Okay, relax. Relax, please, please.
Starting point is 01:50:00 Please, relax. Second place is fine. Silver, I'm cool, it's over. You weren't first choice. Okay, okay? Buddy, come on. You weren't second choice. I wasn't second choice.
Starting point is 01:50:07 No, you're not second choice either. I don't know who lied to you, okay? But listen, you weren't first choice, but you're a great choice. Right? How about that? Yeah, that's something you tell losers. Huh? Listen, okay.
Starting point is 01:50:20 Okay, bronze, I'm on the podium, whatever. What the fuck you get so angry about? What's the matter? Third place, it's fine. Oh, it's cool, whatever. Listen, all right, well, here's the truth. Well, you're being an asshole right now. You weren't first, you weren't second.
Starting point is 01:50:30 You weren't third, okay? Here's third, right here's here, and you were way the fuck. Okay, that's where you were. But it's cool, dude, because you did a great job. That's unfucking believable. You have some balls in front of all these people just to say some shit like that to me. You get angry like that for. What's the matter with you?
Starting point is 01:50:45 I'm all the way in the fucking corner with the dirt? There's dust and shit. No, you've been sucking dick for beer money for 10 years. That is not true. That is not true. I've never sucked any dicks from beer money. Ever in the whole life. I know, but it's between us.
Starting point is 01:50:59 Not one dick. Now, and how do you know that? How'd you just think that people? How do you know people even suck dick for your money? Be grateful, okay? Okay, yeah, I'm grateful. For movie tickets. How many times, remember?
Starting point is 01:51:09 Zero times. Yeah, how many times you go? Yeah, oh, get your tickets to my premiere? It's gonna be awesome. And I'm like, yeah, I'm down. And then I get there and you're like, and people are like, no, I don't know who the fuck you're on this list.
Starting point is 01:51:18 Very nice of you, very nice. Did you have a good time on the show? Huh? It was nice. Okay? All right. It was good. Come on, buddy.
Starting point is 01:51:24 Okay, I'm sorry. Thank you. Thank you. Come on. Get in here. Unreal. It was, it was, it was, it was, it was a lot of fun. But that was such a crazy thing. And that was like very early on in my like career doing this too.
Starting point is 01:51:40 So it was like a cool opportunity. Looking back on it, I do have regrets of being like, nope, not going to go to L.A. Because like, who are you to say that you're not going to go to L.A.? But I give myself some grace because I do. do think that like, especially at that time, I was like protecting myself. Like I really wanted to, uh, I felt very strongly about the authenticity thing. And I'm like, I have to just do the things that I think are right in this moment and I'll probably be wrong. I mean, even decisions that I make today, I could, I will probably look back on and be like, I would have done that differently. But I,
Starting point is 01:52:14 but I, but you can't, you can't like beat yourself up about that. Like that, maybe that was the right choice for that time. How do you know the difference between being authentic and impulsive? I don't think that I did. I don't think I did. I mean, I like to think that I'm not a... You know what I mean? You can make a rash decision like that and go, well, that felt authentic or that feels authentic to me, but it's actually maybe a decision that you haven't been sufficiently considerate around. Sure. I think that I make an effort to not make emotional decisions. So if I'm very angry and I would like to say no, I'm like, I got to walk away from this so that I can can make a decision. decision not based on that. So I think that's a helpful thing, like through therapy, is like emotional decision making, I think, I mean, it can be good to bed. It can work out, but also
Starting point is 01:53:09 you can live to regret that because you're like, oh, I made that when I was not in the clearest headspace or I did that in spite of something. Like, that's also a thing that I desperately try not to do. Like, I don't want to do anything in spite of something. Like, I want to do something. Try to prove someone else or something else. Yeah, like that would, that would just be like an insecurity thing. Like I'm trying to be a secure person, which I consider myself like a secure person, especially when it comes to like creative stuff like that. Like, of course I have moments of insecurity. But when it comes to decision making, I need to be in a point and like give myself some credit for like you've you've made it this far following your gut and your intuition.
Starting point is 01:53:48 So just make a call. And if you're wrong, which I've been wrong many times, it's my fault. Fine. But I, what I can't live with is someone being, like, like an agent or something being like, this is the thing for you. This is what you have to do. And then I end up doing that. And I don't like it. And it doesn't work out. Because a lot of stuff now doesn't work out for people like creatively.
Starting point is 01:54:15 Like, shit doesn't work all the time. Like that's part of the job, kind of. But like, if it was on them, I'd be furious because then it would feel like, oh my God. I let it go for a second. I let go of the reins and I let someone dictate. I can't even own my failure. Yeah, like I can't even, like my failure is that I let you make the decision almost, you know? There's a, the word that's come into mind is conviction.
Starting point is 01:54:43 Doing something with conviction. Yeah. And both me and George Big Nose sneezes a lot. our co-theme for 2026 is high conviction. We both want to be more high conviction with things. So that's when I have a sense that this is the right thing, commit to that thing. And it is way better to be high conviction and fail
Starting point is 01:55:11 than low conviction and fail. Way better. Yeah, yeah. Because at least when you're high conviction and fail, you get to learn, you get to update, you get to, oh, I'm fine, okay, like I went for that. Next time when I go for it again, I'll do it slightly differently or I'll go for something else. But the low conviction failure thing, you're not even moving.
Starting point is 01:55:33 You're just being sort of swept along. You're not learning decision making. And that's, again, it's that sliding versus deciding thing. Yeah. But at no point did you decide for this to happen. Yeah. You just sort of fell into it. I also want to make it clear that,
Starting point is 01:55:49 I don't think that I'm just right. Like, I think I'm, like, it's not that I think I'm right. It's like, I think, no, actually, I, maybe that is what I'm trying to say is that if I believe that I'm right, then I'm like, okay, but I don't think you're wrong. Like, I think you're right too. And I think everyone is right. And I think you need to, like, trust yourself. Like, your intuition, if you can really sit with yourself and you know yourself and you're sitting there, like, this is the thing. You're right. Like, you're right. Just believe that you're right. And just keep following that. Like, allow yourself to make mistakes. Allow yourself to believe. in yourself and allow the belief to dictate your behavior. Like, you'll be surprised where that
Starting point is 01:56:25 could bring you. It just, like, drags you along when you can really be like, this is what feels like the right decision in this moment. It doesn't even have to be professionally. It could be, like, personally or whatever, if you are sitting somewhere and you know, like, okay, I don't want to make an emotional decision and you have that awareness and you're like, I just need to do what's best for me what I truly believe in my heart, you're right. Like, you have to be right. Because it's you, it's your life. Like, you're in charge of everything. like it's your life you'll make the decisions everything is your fault everything that goes wrong is your fault but what that means is that everything that you get out of life is because of you too
Starting point is 01:56:59 and you should be happy for the good things in your life and that that can get hard because when things start going bad you're like oh fucking my shit up right now but it makes the winds like that much sweeter i think then when when people can get to the point where one time time, it only needs to happen one time where you like really feel deeply about something. And then it ends up being right and you get the validation or you, it's correct and you get that from the situation. You realize that you can do that. Like that is a huge moment. Like I can feel something so deeply. And then that's how I made my decision. And then it ended up being the right path. That's so powerful. Instead of overthinking, stopping yourself, which a lot of people do, overthinking it and being
Starting point is 01:57:48 like, well, no, because of this, this and this and whatever. Like, just what is the thing you feel? It's like make it simpler. And this is why, like, the authenticity thing, I think is important because what, what is it just driving you? And it seems very, um, almost like selfish in a way. But it's like, it's further back than that. It's, it's not a self-serving thing.
Starting point is 01:58:09 It's like I, it's just something. I just believe. Like, it's a belief in me that I just need to see play out. Without being, by the way, I don't even know the right word, but just like not in like a negative way. Like I need to get my way because I'm not that person whatsoever. Just there's a belief though that I'm like, I just believe that I'm right. And I can be wrong, but it doesn't change the fact that I believed. And I get to a point and I'm okay with being wrong because that's fine.
Starting point is 01:58:41 The only thing that I need is to believe something. I've said that word a thousand times already. But like it's true. Like that's kind of how I feel about all the decisions or every. single opinion that I have. Like, I need to believe all my opinions. I don't have any opinions that I'm kind of like, oh, I don't know or I can, whatever. Like, if I'm, if I spent time with it and I have an opinion, like, I have an opinion. And I believe in it. And I will like, fight for it. But if you say something that completely destroys my shit, my shit is gone. I'm not, I have no ego. I can get rid of it.
Starting point is 01:59:11 I will keep this one now, you know, like, I'm so willing to learn and, uh, and to grow. Like, want that. I welcome that. I want to be wrong. Like, I want to be wrong. Like, I need to believe that I'm right, but I actually want to be wrong. Like, I actually do. Because then that's where the growth comes. Like, now I'm, now I can get better. You know, like, actually, doing good, like, I don't think that a lot of people just want to live in a comfort zone, right? They just want to live in a space that makes them, that just validates them completely all the time. And they, it's whatever. Some,
Starting point is 01:59:48 not all people, but like, some people want to live in there. I actually don't believe that having comfort every single day of your life will result in some sort of net positive. I think that it's only a matter of time
Starting point is 02:00:00 would you get, like, restless and you'll, like, create a problem because you don't have any problems. At least for me, and I don't know this to be right, I'm just some idiot, but it almost feels like humans are not designed that way.
Starting point is 02:00:15 Like, you need purpose. And part of it, purpose is challenged, like you need something to challenge you, but if your actions are just putting you back in your comfort zone, what do you get? Like, you're setting yourself up to fail almost. Not only you're not growing, forget about that, but this thing that feels very innate of challenges and purpose of being a human being or whatever, whatever that may mean, it's different for everybody. If you don't have that, it's like, where do you think you're going? Like, that's going to deteriorate your mental health almost. You're done? You're done?
Starting point is 02:00:46 you've already done everything and now you're just gonna you're you're just done you know like a part of me doesn't understand why there are people who work on wall street that make fucking 80 million dollars a year and they work 80 hours a week still and it's like bro you got fucking 250 million dollars in the bank do something else like but part of me does get it part of me does get why there is that because it's like, I don't know, that I have like a weird relationship with it because I do understand the feeling of like it's not necessarily about the money anymore,
Starting point is 02:01:28 but I also think that like a work life balance is very important. I'm not working super hard to have $250 million. I don't care. I don't care about having $250 million. I want to enjoy my life. You know, like I don't want to like work my entire life and then be, and then the payoff is things that I could be doing now.
Starting point is 02:01:46 Like you want to hang out with your friends? You want to, you know, see your family or spend time. You can. You can. You're going to sacrifice your entire life all these years to what? The end goal is like, well, now I can sit back and relax and just enjoy my time. Brother, you can do it now. Have you ever heard the parable of the Mexican fishermen?
Starting point is 02:02:05 Have you heard this? He's Mexican in this one? I thought he was from a different country, honestly. Which fisherman's this? I don't know. I don't know. Okay. An American investment banker was at a small pier
Starting point is 02:02:17 on a small coastal town village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat was several large yellowfin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them. The Mexican replied, only a little while. The American then asked, why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish?
Starting point is 02:02:34 Mexican said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs. The American then asked, but what do you do with the rest of your time? The Mexican fisherman said, I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesters with my wife, Maria, and stroll into the village every evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos. I have a full and busy life. The Americans scoffed. I have an MBA from Harvard and can help you, he said. You should spend more time fishing, with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. With the proceeds from the bigger boat, you could buy several boats, and eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats.
Starting point is 02:03:03 Instead of selling your catch to a middleman, you could sell directly to the processor, and eventually open up your own cannery. You could control the product, processing, and distribution, you said. Of course you would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City and then Los Angeles and eventually to New York City, well, you will run your expanding enterprise. The Mexican fisherman asked, but how long will all this take? To which the American replied, oh, 15 to 20 years or so. But what then? asked the Mexican. The American laughed and said, that's the best part. When the time was right, you would announce an IPO, you could sell your company stock to the public and become very rich. You would make millions. Millions? Then what? The American said,
Starting point is 02:03:40 then you could retire, move to a small coastal fishing village where you could sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siastas with your wife and swole to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play guitar with your amigos. Life is often simpler than we make. Yeah, dude. I mean, that's exactly what I'm saying. That's so true. Like, I think that it's tough. Like, a lot of people, sometimes their identity becomes their job. I'm very self-aware about that, that I don't want that. Especially, I think that would make me unlikable. If, my job and some sort of like the followers and doing live shows and already sometimes people are probably
Starting point is 02:04:18 like a person probably sucks like they think they're a man or whatever like I separate these things because they're completely different I just want to enjoy my life like I'm I'm already it's already good enough that doesn't slow me down because I have passions and things that I want to accomplish but I will never sacrifice the things that actually matter in my life like I'm not going to miss a birthday. I was going to say, what matters? What matters is, what matters is making sure that I'm being a good person, dude. Like, honestly, like, I just want people when I pass away to be like, that was a good dude. And, like, that's pretty much the extent of it. Like, I just want that. And I, and I, ideally, that would come from, you know, the, like, everybody.
Starting point is 02:05:07 I want to be as helpful as I can. I do want to make an impact in some sort of way. But I, I, I really just, like, I just want to be a good dude. And I, and I just want to earn things because I think that makes me feel good to, to know that I'm putting work in and trying to earn something and I'm getting things back from it. That feels like a really cool exchange. But I really just want to be a good dude. And I think there's also this notion online where it's like, if you're, if you're 20 years old and you're not fucking drop shipping and you're not fucking like, into crypto and fucking wearing blue tinted glasses that like
Starting point is 02:05:47 you're a fucking loser. Like I don't think it's your life isn't the Lambo dude. This isn't the end all be all. It's like that everyone's like I'm going to get some money then I'll buy a Lambo. It's like you don't need to do that. Like I do think like I don't want to say that like
Starting point is 02:06:04 you know some people who are very successful would just be like oh well money isn't will won't make you happy. I think that's insane to say that. Like, of course it will make you happy. Having financial security is a massive weight off your shoulders. So that already is like, that trumps everything that like the argument of like it won't make you happy. I get what people are saying when they say that. It's not like you could buy your way to happiness.
Starting point is 02:06:28 It's like, well, I bought a plane. I got cars and whatever. It's like, yeah, but you're still fucked up emotionally because you haven't really spent time doing that. And you haven't really seen your family. And, you know, you worked all this. You worked this long for what? For things for like, you know, a, uh, the number in your bank account to be higher, you're like missing the point, in my opinion.
Starting point is 02:06:48 Like me, I, like I said, I'm a very social dude. I like making new friends. I like learning new things. I like traveling and getting out in the world and putting myself in uncomfortable situations. That's the only way that I feel like I am growing and I'm obsessed with that. I'm obsessed with growth and just learning about what the world has to offer. Like, and everyone has something. something to offer, you know, like, I, and I wish I could know it all. I wish I could to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to be a person that, you know, I'm the type of person that randomly, like, I'll be in a deep conversation with just like a fucking stranger, like, because I, I enjoy that. I like hearing. I always tell, I always tell Greg, like, one of my dream jobs is to be a bartender in, like, a slow pup, you know, so I could just, like, you can get to know your
Starting point is 02:07:42 regulars and like that just seems like a very like nice thing to to and and not aesthetically like I really think that it's a nice thing to be able to sit down and talk to someone and it like feel that sense of community like that's the best dude like that's the best I saw a video recently on TikTok where this guy was like interviewing people and he found this old woman and she was talking about pubs and how they're like the greatest thing in the world and she's like you're like you You just go to your local pub and she's like, I feel like people don't do this anymore. Like you go to your local pub and, you know,
Starting point is 02:08:18 you talk to the people in there about like your problems at your job or your relationship and you talk to the bartender and they sometimes they give advice and it's bad advice or good advice. But that sense of community, it's like a place you can go. Like I'm obsessed with stuff like that. Like I love that. And I also love how there's different versions of that. You can never know everything.
Starting point is 02:08:38 Everything changes. Everyone's different. And everyone's right. I believe. Like everyone's right. If they believe they're right, then they are. Like, I think that I'm right for me, but not for you, if that makes sense. And I think that's sort of fascinating to me.
Starting point is 02:08:52 So I want to get out there and I want to experience all that and I want to feel uncomfortable because that, again, I get so much from that. It feels very rewarding. And I did make the mistake when, because I wasn't always like that. I grew up in a neighborhood, Astoria Queens, where everything that you want is there, basically. At least it was for me. And I had a lot of friends in the neighborhood and, you know, whatever. And I would barely even go into Manhattan to, like, hang out or go to a bar.
Starting point is 02:09:27 Like, it's just like, I'm just going to stay here, whatever. But something in me shifted and I was like, I want to see more things. And once that started happening and I started traveling, I was like, like the first time that I took a flight from Paris to Mekanos and I was just looking out the window and it was like, oh my God. Like the world is like massive, as stupid as this sounds.
Starting point is 02:09:49 By the way, this was like seven years ago. But I was like, the world is massive and there's so much out there that like you can see pictures of it, but it's like the pictures aren't going to do it justice, dude, like get out there and see it.
Starting point is 02:10:04 Like the world is so cool and there's so many cool people. Like the idea, like a fan of just going to some random small town in Ireland and walking into a pub and making a friend is like the greatest thing in the world to me. And like just, and like now you're so lucky because you live in a time
Starting point is 02:10:25 where like you could keep in touch with that guy if you wanted to. You know what I mean? Like that's such a cool thing to me. It's like now you've got a friend in fucking Ireland across the water. Like it's like, I don't know. Things like that are fascinating.
Starting point is 02:10:37 I actually think that is the point. Like that's the point. And the job is just so I can be able to do that. And I'm fortunate enough that right now I could do stuff like that. So I'm good. I just have to fulfill my personal, like, need to want to create and also make an impact. Like, if I am given the privilege of being more successful than I am right now, I will give back more. Like, that is something that I want to do and something that's always been in me of, like,
Starting point is 02:11:10 like giving back to people, making donations to charities and things like that. Like, I want to feel like I'm doing the right thing because I don't need all of it. I don't need all the money and I don't need that sort of thing. Like, I get a lot of joy out of helping people. And I get a lot of joy out of just like of other people being happy. I love that. Like, I love being in a group of people and everyone's just super happy. But I did make the mistake at a time where I thought that everyone should want the things that I want, which is wrong.
Starting point is 02:11:36 not everyone needs to be like entrepreneurial and like chasing something like follow your passion and do whatever like find a thing like your job is in your passion find something else and whatever not everyone is is wired that way which is the beauty of it too that that was like then you become this person who's like i want to save everyone and i want to and that's wrong i think and i've gotten to a point now where you you know like we were saying earlier there are some people that are content the fisherman, right? I was the fucking dude at Harvard. Harvard was never in the cards for a guy like me, but I was that guy where I was like, here's what we could do, you know, whatever. And they're just like, bro, I don't want to do that. You want to do that. And it's like, oh, yeah. You know, like, you can't
Starting point is 02:12:25 force that on people either. So to make it easier, a very simplified version is like, make yourself happy. don't do it in spite of anything and you don't need everyone to do the thing that you're doing. Run your game. That's it. Run your race. And everyone else is running their race. But make sure that everyone around you is happy.
Starting point is 02:12:43 Because that's really the only thing. Dude, if you're content with one fish a day, what the fuck am I going to say? If I'm not content with one fish a day, that sucks for me. I got to go out and fish more. But you're cool. I'm kind of jealous of you then.
Starting point is 02:12:57 You know? Like, and just because I have one, it doesn't mean anything at a certain point. If what I want out of life is to truly just, you know, be able to travel and see people and learn things and talk to people and have these types of conversations, and I'm doing it. I got on a plane to get here to have this conversation with you. I'm doing it. What am I going to be upset about? This is the thing that I wanted for so long and I'm doing it now.
Starting point is 02:13:24 So like, I'm playing with house money. So just realizing that also and not just getting on the hands. hamster wheel for the sake of getting on it. It's like nothing's ever good enough or whatever. Dude, it's not like free yourself up. If you're looser, I think that things, it's easier to kind of get your job done also. If you're like real strictly, like I got it, whatever we were talking about before. It's like, I need to be creative right now because I need to make more money and then I can do this and then I'll be, it's like, bro, just just find what you're doing and just like try to, you know, whatever, I'm fucking talking in circles now. This fucking new tonic is killing me.
Starting point is 02:14:03 No, man, you're infectious. You're really infectious. I'm being serious. I'm being serious. I can see why you're successful. I can see why people follow you. I can see why however many tens of thousands of people sold out Madison Square Garden to come and see you as well. You know, that level of self-belief that doesn't feel tyrannical, doesn't feel like it's overbearing or domineering or selfish.
Starting point is 02:14:31 Like, I have a good idea of what I like. and I like what I like and I want to try and create a life that helps me to enjoy as much of that as possible is about as infectious of a philosophy as you can get and I can totally see why you've been successful.
Starting point is 02:14:47 Thank you, dude. And I appreciate you saying that because sometimes, and I realize the way that I'm talking about it now, it almost sounds like, like I'm a freight train and it's like, I have this thing in my head
Starting point is 02:14:58 and I have to do it my way and everyone get out of my way. It's not like that. Like, I'm much softer than that. Like, that goes on in here and but mostly I'm scared like mostly I'm scared and I'm like second guessing myself but I like am putting one foot in front of the other
Starting point is 02:15:14 because I feel like I have to because there's a voice in my head that I mean obviously I'm I'm like anxious about things and I'm and I'm scared of certain things or whatever but there's a voice in my head that's so intense and it's so loud that like you'll fucking do it like don't be a coward like do it and like it's so loud that I can't sort of ignore it but that only exists in here I'm not like
Starting point is 02:15:34 a freight train. Like I'm not like this like when we're on set or something or when we're talking about ideas like, no, no, no, we're going to do it this. It's not like that. It's more of like an internal belief thing. I had a conversation with a guy called David Data. He wrote this super famous book in the 90s called The Way of the Superior Man. And he's a coach, philosopher, spiritual guide for men. And guys, especially that have lost their purpose a little bit and don't really know where they're going in life. And I did the first interview that he's done in a decade a couple of weeks ago. And when I was doing the research, look at him, I went back to the start of his career. And this guy has had the most fucking eclectic career that you have ever
Starting point is 02:16:19 heard of. He did quantum mechanics. Then he did pure mathematics. Then he worked on AI in the 80s. then he ran a yoga, ashram, retreat for forever. Then he did this coaching thing. Then he did a family thing. Then he became an author. Then he went back and did more AI stuff. And he founded company just bounced all over the place. And I asked him while we were talking, dude, I can't really.
Starting point is 02:16:48 What are you? I can't piece together. I can't weave the path of your life. Yeah. In a straight line. and he said, when I don't want to do something or when I'm called to change what I'm doing, being out of alignment with that voice is so painful to me, physically painful to me. It feels like someone's wrenching my insides.
Starting point is 02:17:13 I don't have any choice. So what from the outside looks like self-belief and bravery and single-mindedness from the inside is actually fear of pain. And the pain is me being out of alignment. And you sound like him. You sound like that guy. The voice in my head is so loud that I can't not do it. I can't not do the thing because they're saying,
Starting point is 02:17:40 don't be a coward. Go and do it. Go and chase your dreams. Yeah. And it's like, yo, if I feel like I have, like one part of me feels like I have the potential. And I think that a lot of people see potential in themselves for certain things. like, you know, I could do that or I can do this or whatever, but they get discouraged along the way.
Starting point is 02:17:55 I never get discouraged because I have that where it's like, just keep going. Like, are you going to stop? Like, you can't stop. You believe it. Like, if you believe it, then it's like it's, those things like meet. And it's like, but you believe it. Like, if I believe it, I have to keep going then because I believe it. I can't, like, I have to be, I have to see it through.
Starting point is 02:18:18 You know, like, it's really tough. for me to like, there are some things because there was a point in my life where I was very experimental too. Like I'll try a bunch of different things and just to sort of see. Like creatively I think that is
Starting point is 02:18:34 helpful. Like I don't really see a lot of merit in picking something and it's like, well, I have to do that now. Like that's the thing that I, like, I think there is merit in realizing along that journey where your strengths are and it's okay to pivot.
Starting point is 02:18:51 It's okay to pivot. and do, you know, things that now make more sense that are resonating even harder, because there's no way you have it figured out on day one. Like, no matter what, you could plan all you want and you can do whatever, but it's never going to go the way that you think. So, I mean, that's another thing, too, that, you know, me and Greg have had multiple discussions about where creatively people can get into a creative rut where they feel like, I have to keep planning to perfect this.
Starting point is 02:19:25 And I don't think that's helpful. Like for anything. Like I think that you can only learn by doing. Like trial by fire. Like just put yourself out there. Like you can plan a little bit. Give me an example. Starting a podcast, even.
Starting point is 02:19:43 If you're starting a podcast and you're like, I want to start a podcast, you have a loose idea. You have something that you want to do, cool, whatever. Like, dude, start. But you're going to spend three months being like, so here's the strategy,
Starting point is 02:19:53 or I'm going to have conversations with all these people, and I'm really going to dial it in or whatever. You think you're not going to pivot? You think you got it right right now? You haven't even started. Like, you don't have it right.
Starting point is 02:20:01 You need to start now, though, because you're only going to learn those things. Did you not begin working on the live show a year before you even went out there, thinking of the song that you were going to walk out to? That, that to me is like a different thing. So, like, what the shows were? No.
Starting point is 02:20:19 Like, those moments are like, I'm scoring something, like a part of a movie of my life, kind of. Like, that's what that kind of feels like. Of like, okay, that's the moment that I want to make happen. This is the thing that's motivating me right now. Like, kind of how do we get there?
Starting point is 02:20:38 Also, the action of like, okay, that's what we want. We want Radio City. It wasn't until after the first show that I looked at my agent, I was like, I want Radio City. City. And he's like, all right, like, I'll kind of work on it. And we'll see if we can get it or whatever. This is after the first show. Who the fuck am I, by the way? That was crazy. I was on a high. I came
Starting point is 02:21:00 off stage. I was like, that was sick. So I was like, yo, Radio City, book the fucking Yankee Stadium. I don't care. But, um, so yeah, it's like, I want to do that. I'm not ready for it. But it's like, book it over there. I'll get to it. And we'll get to it out. Um, I'm focused on, okay, I need to be better tomorrow or I need to be better at the next show and whatever. I'm like, we're going to get there eventually, but I'm not like planning. and just being like, so I'll give you an example. So when we're starting the tour, right? It's a decision of like, should we, should we go on tour? And then it's like, yes, we should.
Starting point is 02:21:35 Action the next day. So an action would be like, we're talking to the agent. We're like, okay, what's the process for this thing and going along the way? It's like, all right, whatever. Like, of course, then you have to get to planning what the show is going to be. I mean, there's no way you're going to walk out there and be like, well, I have no plan. Hello. There is that sort of planning, but that's not necessarily what I'm talking about. I'm talking about stalling the process so that you can perfect something that you can't perfect. It would be not booking the show until you'd written the show. Exactly. And even then, it's like, what do you think? It's not going to change, dude. I mean, we had the conversation yesterday where your fucking show changed every five minutes or whatever the fuck. You were like, yeah, I changed up 40% of every show. Bailed out in between each show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, but it's true. It's like the only way that you can really learn. Like, think about how long. If you, like, you like, you like, We're like, okay, we're going to do that, but we're going to, you know, really plan, really honing it in and blah, blah, blah.
Starting point is 02:22:25 Like, you're just going to have to jump. It's a lot of that. Do you have a tattoo? Yeah, it's a smile on the inside of my rest. Okay. I get the same sort of feeling when I got tattoos. It's like, well, I want the tattoo. And now I'm sitting in the shop and I'm like, fuck.
Starting point is 02:22:43 Like, shit, this thing is permanent or whatever. And I have the same feeling every time I got a tattoo where I'm like this. and then it's like, are you ready? And a part of me just goes like, fuck it. Like, maybe you'll hate it. Like, but whatever, fuck it.
Starting point is 02:22:57 It's like that approach is like what you need is you're never going to be like super ready. You're never going to have it fully dialed in. Like, but you need to just do it and just suck at it. Because no matter what, it's going to suck. It's,
Starting point is 02:23:11 if you're lucky, it's going to suck. If you're lucky, if you're, if you can't look back on something you did years ago, and you're like, that was great, then you probably suck now. Because there's no one getting it right on the first try. Like, you should suck because that means that you grew and you got better at something,
Starting point is 02:23:28 but you have to start. Like, you're never going to plan your way out of not sucking. Like, you're going to look back embarrassed a little bit. You're going to look back and be like, that wasn't great. And also, things change. You're going to have to adapt anyway. Just start. Like, just start, dude.
Starting point is 02:23:42 Like, just suck at it. Just suck at it. But you're doing it. You're doing it. Make it your identity. Just do it. Like, just do it. If you want to be a rapper, dude, then be a rapper.
Starting point is 02:23:51 Be it. You can be it. You know, like, just do it then. No, you don't have to sell out a fucking venue to be a rapper. Bro, rap. Just do it. Like, then you're a rapper. Like, make it your identity.
Starting point is 02:24:03 When people think of your name, they're going to associate yourself with that. They're going to associate your name with like, yeah, that kid's a rapper. That's what you want. Then you're it. Being successful at it, that's a different problem. That's a different problem for a different day. You're going to have to be good at it. You're going to have to care about it and all that fucking bullshit.
Starting point is 02:24:18 it, but like, if you want to be something, dude, make the decision and do it. You can. Like, what you're worried about and the thing that stalls you is, like, are other people going to think that, uh, that I'm good at this? Or how am I going to look? Am I going to look cringy? Am I going to, whatever? Like, get to the point where you're okay with that. Like, just, just believe in who you are, know who you are and be like, I don't care if people think I'm cringy. Like, of course people, people probably think that about people in your comments probably like, this gets cringy, bro. this kid. Like, but whatever, bro, I don't care. It's not why I'm doing it. Like, I, I, this,
Starting point is 02:24:55 everything I'm saying feels so real to me. Like, this is not like a fake thing that I have. So, I'm okay with people interpreting it in a different way and thinking that it's for show or, or whatever. Like, it doesn't matter, bro, because I don't, one, I don't know you and two, like, I have to live my life. I'm going to walk away from this thing. Like, even if you're looking at me right now, and you're like, this kid's kind of an idiot and I don't agree with anything. He's saying, bro, I don't care. I don't care because it's real me and I have to live my life. It's my reality.
Starting point is 02:25:25 So like, it's kind of like that. There has to be a balance though, to be fair. Because everything I'm saying, you can get yourself in trouble where it's like, I believe everything that I say and whatever. That's close to delusion. I only, it only works and you're not a fucking brutal hang if you have checks and balances
Starting point is 02:25:47 and you're very willing to take on criticism and you're very willing to listen as well because you can't just always be the one talking. You can't, because you're not going to learn anything. Like if you're not giving someone the opportunity to talk or to teach you something or you think they can't teach you anything, you're wrong. You're wrong because everybody can teach you something. Just shut up and listen sometimes.
Starting point is 02:26:08 But then like if you can master those two things, it's very empowering to know that like, Oh man, I'm willing to be wrong. But I also like, I believe in myself in my decisions, but I mean, that definitely could get me to a dead end. But I have to be okay with that. And I am. I am okay with that because I'm already grateful for what I have. Like I'm already at the point where like this is good enough for me.
Starting point is 02:26:33 I'm willing to hit the dead end. I was willing to hit the dead end fucking 10 years ago. Like that's the fact that I always feel like I have nothing to lose. I have nothing to lose. Like day one I felt like I had nothing to lose. I still feel like that now. Like I could take a risk, whatever. What's going to happen?
Starting point is 02:26:51 Cares. Or like this is going to upset someone because you're not going to do this and that's going to upset someone. Or someone's like, yo, this is going to be a bad decision for your career. But if I don't feel like it's right for me, but I don't care, take it then. Take my career. I don't care. Like, I have to stand on it like that.
Starting point is 02:27:09 You know, like you have to. you have to do what's right for you. When I first got signed to William Morris, I had a meeting, and I was young, and I was on a big, it was a big table, and it was a lot of people there. I've done one of those. And it was like, this lady's like,
Starting point is 02:27:26 I'm your book agent. I was like, don't read. Who's next? Like, someone else, like, you know, but then they were like talking about stuff. And one of the things that I said in that meeting was, um, I was also like, didn't really know much.
Starting point is 02:27:39 So I, the, The idea that I had in my head about agents was like, they're going to try and like take over your career and make you do stuff that you don't want to do or whatever, like, for whatever reason. And I told them like, you know, there's a chance that you present a thousand things and I say no to all of them.
Starting point is 02:27:54 Like I'm going to do the thing that I, that I want to do. And I wanted them to know that I wasn't intimidated by the moment, even if I was intimidated by the moment, I was lying. But I wanted them to know that like, you can't push me around. I don't know how much I believe that.
Starting point is 02:28:08 But I was like, I didn't want them to think that it's like we're we got it from here kid type of thing. I was like, no, get the fuck off me. Like I'm still going to do this thing. I will accept help, of course, and some sort of guidance. But it has to resonate with this thing that has gotten to me, like gotten me everywhere that I have gone. Like it has to resonate with that.
Starting point is 02:28:30 Like I can't do something that doesn't hit there. I just refuse to do that. Whatever that means. If that means missing out, which I've missed out on a ton of stuff, It's gotten me in trouble. I've definitely said no to things that I probably should have done. But whatever. It's fine.
Starting point is 02:28:47 It's okay. I'm willing to lose. It's fine. But that's the route I'm choosing to go. That I'm okay with losing. I'm okay with missing out on stuff. I'll learn from it. And maybe it takes a few tries to even learn from it.
Starting point is 02:29:03 It's not like one thing. And then it's like, now I got it. I'm good. Like, no, it's like, it's a series of me. mistakes. But that's the point. I'm happy to make mistakes. Who the fuck is not making mistakes and is cool?
Starting point is 02:29:19 It was like, you know, you got nothing going on. You got, you're not making mistakes. You're not taking fucking huge else. Like, what are we talking about then, dude? No risks, no nothing? What is your day like, dude? Like, what is it? You're just going to write on post-its and sneeze?
Starting point is 02:29:35 That's it? Give me something, George. You know? Like, take risk. It's exciting. It's exciting to fail, dude. Like, it makes you a person. It gives you something, at least.
Starting point is 02:29:46 But, like, I don't know. Just fucking... I don't know, dude. I get very passionate about this, dude. Forget about it. You put a fucking glass of red wine in front of me. We'd be here for 10 hours. It'd be a wrap.
Starting point is 02:30:01 I get it, man. What would you say to someone who struggles with their self-belief or self-assuredness? every time that they try to tap into their gut instinct, they struggle. They can't really hear it. Or they're scared. What would you say?
Starting point is 02:30:23 I think that's normal. I think it's normal to tap in, listen to it, it doesn't work out, and you're scared, and you're scared because it hasn't worked out in the past. Part of it. Keep listening. Just keep listening. And keep doing. If that's what's interesting to you,
Starting point is 02:30:37 if you think it would fulfill you to be at a place eventually where you're, your sort of end-all be-all is your intuition. That's something that you want. Just all you got to do is listen and keep doing it. And just keep making the mistakes. I didn't get it right. I still, bro, I get this shit wrong all the time. I don't even know if what I'm saying right now is coherent.
Starting point is 02:31:03 I'm just talking. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, it's probably not. Don't laugh. So no, I know it's not. But I, like, you just lay it all out on the table. It's okay to be vulnerable. Like, whatever.
Starting point is 02:31:13 Be cringe, be whatever. but you get somewhere with that. At least it's real. Like at least if you're being vulnerable, people know that and it's real. You're taking a swing by doing that. I can come on this show and just say a bunch of things
Starting point is 02:31:30 that I think you want to hear. I don't even know what you want to hear, but like I could just do that, but like I don't get anything for that. Like I'm trying right now. I'm trying right now. This is, but this is all like very real to me, everything that I'm saying.
Starting point is 02:31:45 It's like, this is very real to me. If it resonates with people who watch your show, that is like an incredible feeling for me. And if it doesn't, it's like, ah, this is one of those things. I took a shot, you know, like, but it's real to me. I don't need them to think that, you know, I don't need it to resonate because it resonates with me and it works for me. And it may not work for everyone, which is totally fine.
Starting point is 02:32:10 How does it feel to be having a conversation that's way more serious than the ones that you usually do when you go on podcasts to get to talk about this stuff. I enjoy it. I mean, I, I, this is why,
Starting point is 02:32:21 like, you know, I wanted to come on this show. I'll tell you, by the way, before I met you, I was invited by Spotify to go out to L.A. And they were like,
Starting point is 02:32:31 oh, come to this thing. And I was like, okay, cool. Like, they wanted me to be on some fucking panel. And I was like, all right,
Starting point is 02:32:35 cool. And then, and then I saw that you were on it. Like, two weeks prior to that, my brother sent a link of your John Bellion interview in my family's group chat.
Starting point is 02:32:47 You'd been friends with him forever. With John. Yeah. Very loose friends. But yeah. But they sent that link in there. And like my whole family is like John Billion fans. And my brother was like, you should go on this guy's show.
Starting point is 02:33:03 Like this would be like a cool thing for you to be on. And then two weeks later, I got the email that you're going to be on the panel. So immediately I'm like, I'm going to fucking talk to this dude. Like then this is when it starts, right? It starts where it's like, okay, I'm going to be on the panel with this guy, and I want to be on his show. What does it take to kind of get there? And I don't know. I don't know you.
Starting point is 02:33:29 And like at that point, like, I don't know you. I've never talked to you, whatever. So you could have just been like, like, I was kind of a fucking asshole. Like, whatever. I don't want to have a show anyway. I don't care. But, like, we meet and we immediately, like, have this report. I'm like, this is great.
Starting point is 02:33:41 And then the next day I saw you at the other fucking thing. and then now I'm sitting here. That feeling is incredibly validating and it's enough for me to believe in the intuition and the energy and that feeling of like just follow your gut and do those things. Say yes to shit. Put yourself in a situation where you could get lucky
Starting point is 02:34:03 in a way and get this opportunity because I can see that as like this. Some people could look at this as like you got lucky. But I'm open to it. that. Like I'm putting myself in situations where I could potentially get lucky. I see luck as not a magical thing, but just opportunity that you took advantage of. That looks like luck. Because the chances of you being on that panel are, I don't, I don't even know the fucking chances, but it was there. And I could either do nothing because there was other people on there.
Starting point is 02:34:38 They're not sitting here today. Like I'm sitting here today. And it was because I was like, sort of intentional about that. I wanted that. I wasn't going to be like, hey, buddy, can I be on your fucking show? But like, how do you get to this point
Starting point is 02:34:52 that you, like, you want to connect with someone, you think that this would be a good fit, and then it ends up being so, and now I'm sitting here. Like, that is incredibly validating. And again,
Starting point is 02:35:02 that's enough for me to be like, this is how you get things done. Just, just be open to the idea, dude. Like, just be prepared for your opportunities. And then it looks like luck. But if I went there
Starting point is 02:35:13 and we never spoke, or I was too shy to speak to you. I felt like, he doesn't want to, like, fuck with me. Like, he has fucking Luke Holmes and, like, these very famous people on his show.
Starting point is 02:35:21 He's not going to interview me, bro. Me, of all people. Like, if I did that to myself and got in my own way, then I'm not sitting here. And we're not having this conversation. Get out of your way, dude. Like, just believe,
Starting point is 02:35:36 the only thing that you need is, like, belief that it could happen. That was enough for me to be like, well, I'm going to talk to. I'm just a little fucking guy. You know, like, I'm just, you know, like, but if, you get in your own way like that, you're closing yourself off. You don't have the opportunity for people
Starting point is 02:35:49 be like, oh, you got lucky or like, you know, whatever the fuck. Like, you're closing yourself off to opportunities. If you're putting, if you're getting in your own way, like just get out, like even getting out of your own way will result in a lot. Opportunities pop up. You'd be surprised of how they do that. Just say yes, dude. Just say yes to shit. It's exciting. Once you, once it happens to you, it's very exciting. And it doesn't happen all the time, but it will happen. Like, I say yes to shit. I mean, you can say, I mean, I said yes to shit for a year, and nothing ever happened with that. And then once things start happening, then it kind of feels like, you met this person,
Starting point is 02:36:25 and then you met that person or whatever. And like, you know, the networking aspect of that, bro, just be a good dude. I believe that, or at least the people that I want to be around, if you're a good guy, they like you. They want to root for you. And it's like, I just want to be that. I want to meet people. They think I'm a good guy.
Starting point is 02:36:42 And it's like, well, I'm going to remember that. I like that kid. you know, I like the thing that he believes or the things that he says or whatever the fuck, you know, and I respect the thing that he does. I want to be around people that I respect that I like, that I think are good people. I won't surround myself with people that I think are like, fucked that are like weird and like do like bad shit. Like I'm not covering for you, dude. Like, you know, like I'm not like, I want you to be a good person because that's what I'm on. That's what I'm about. Like I don't, I don't want to be around people that I feel like,
Starting point is 02:37:13 are negative or like trying to hurt people or like whatever like I'm not about that at all like I'm just trying to be a good dude and I want that mutual respect from people and that's it just simplify it bro get out of your way I'm talking to myself by the way because I did that for years did it for years like getting in my own way overthinking nope not good enough the example that I just gave you I've done that numerous times of being like why would they talk to me bro like why and whatever and like who knows what could have happened with that i refuse to do that now i refuse to do that what do you do when that fear comes up just like don't be a bitch like stop like what's the reason like what's the actual reason like what are you afraid of like if if it doesn't
Starting point is 02:38:05 work out you're in the same spot you are now like how is it actually scary when you think about it in that way like what is scary about that you either open a door and there's an opportunity or there's nothing. Shut the door. You're good. It's it. That's all it is. Like, you're opening doors. You open a door. There's an opportunity. Oh, wow. That's great. That's what I wanted. There's nothing there. You close the door. What the fuck happened? Nothing. It's just, it's neutral. It the fear is like, it actually can put you at this, like, insane disadvantage in your life if you get in your own way. Because, like, the opportunities, you're closing yourself off to them. You need opportunities. You need help from people. And you need to be, like, collaborative and but you also need to be confident and assertive in certain ways and kind of like
Starting point is 02:38:51 put your foot in the door you know and like sometimes people will slowly shut a door I'm on doors today like crazy by the way but someone's slowly shut a door and you got to stick your foot in and like let it hit your foot and just kind of like you got it sometimes you got to do that you can't just like stand there and let someone slowly shut the door in your face like be assertive like know who you are that is the most of you are that is the most of important thing. Know who you are, be confident in who you are, and really believe, really believe yourself, but be humble about it. Like, believe, start a fire in yourself and be like, like, but also, like, you have to be a humble person. You have to be likable. And
Starting point is 02:39:28 you're not the most important person in the world. Like, be a good guy, too. But be assertive. Put yourself out there. It's actually a lot of fun. And when you get used to failing a lot, It's just, that is funny. That even helps me even more than probably shit working out, honestly. Things that work out now, like that probably plays against me. Like, now the more success, the more unrelatable you become. Like, I'd rather fail at this point. It gives me something to talk about, you know?
Starting point is 02:39:56 So either way, it's a positive. You fail, you've got a funny story. If it works out, you got the thing you wanted. You're the man, dude. Honestly, you're one of a kind. Really one of a kind. I'm very, very glad that you decided to stalk me. say that like it's crazy i'm glad that you decided to stalk me to l.a i really am first of all i was
Starting point is 02:40:16 invited for i don't even know if that's true but that it's um it's very gravitational being around you yeah like very electric being around you and i can see why you've got this rabid support this like unbelievable energy it's like very very very very compelling so I'm just fired up now that we're friends and I get to watch you go and do the fucking stuff you've got cool things coming up over the next couple of years and it's it's it's like fucking Bellion's doing red rocks right later this year and there's a difference between seeing someone's stuff online which I hadn't I hadn't seen your stuff had you seen my stuff before Bellion yeah dude you're fucking everywhere what he's
Starting point is 02:41:09 talking about sorry about that well don't forget Had you seen my top three podcasts? But don't forget the fucking headlights, right? Yeah, yeah. You know, the Vendairo, and you don't watch that much YouTube and you don't spend that much time on podcast. Hey. Well, I don't, I spend time, but I don't, like, go back to the same thing.
Starting point is 02:41:24 Right, okay, okay. I'm scrolling. The fact that I got to know John, and then I get to see him do a thing, and I get to, like, root for my boy. Yeah. One of the greatest gifts is to become friends with someone that you're a fan of, Or to become a fan of someone that you're friends with. And then you get, it's 10 times better to go and watch someone or to see one of your friends.
Starting point is 02:41:53 So George, big nose sneezes a lot, is writing a buck at the moment. And that thing, I'm watching this sucker unfold one sentence per day, right? Like slowly being crafted and I'm hearing him talk about it and I'm giving him a, oh, I don't really like that. And then that thing's going to come out. And when I read it, it's going to be the best book that I've ever read. Because I'm going to love the person that did it. And when Bellion gets to do Red Rocks, I'm going to be like, that's kind of my fucking boy. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:42:23 Like, that's my boy doing that. And that's fucking, like, it shows amazing and rah, rah, rah. And then the same thing for you. I'm really, really fucking glad that you reached out. And I think that you're awesome. And it's sick to have you here. Thank you, dude. I really do appreciate, like, this conversation.
Starting point is 02:42:38 Like, I don't get to do it often, like, on camera or whatever. But I do ramble quite often with my friends. Well, you rambled. When you get fucking yapping, it's, it goes in a good direction. And that's it, man. We need to do this again. Yeah. That's it.
Starting point is 02:42:58 Where should people go to check out everything you do? You can go follow me at Joe Sanagato. Good luck spelling it. Josh Pepino. Josh Pepino. Where did pee come from now? I don't know. It is what it is.
Starting point is 02:43:09 It's getting it worse. And go, and the basement yard is the podcast. podcast. So go check that out everywhere. Sick. All right. See you next time, everyone. Dude. Oh, fucking man. I'm so sick. Well done.
Starting point is 02:43:25 I get asked all the time for book suggestions. People want to get into reading fiction or nonfiction or real life stories. And that's why I made a list of 100 of the most interesting and impactful books that I've ever read. These are the most life-changing reads that I've ever found. And there's descriptions about why I like them and links to go and buy them. and it's completely free, and you can get it right now by going to chriswillx.com slash books. That's chriswillex.com slash books.

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