Monday Morning Podcast 1-28-19
00:00In the mountain, in the kitchen, even in the living, they are really everywhere to ride the empty baths.But now we go to the finish, bring them to a Bebath collection point quickly.You will always find one in your neighborhood on Bebath.beBebath!Together, better for nature and for all of us.Campaign in cooperation with the OVAM.How's it going?I'm doing this Sunday night because I'm a busy, freckled beaver this week.
00:37So I actually got a buddy over, going to smoke a cigar with him.I was like, well, why don't we kill two birds with one stone?And I'll just have you on the fucking podcast.The one and only, Josh Adamayas.Hello, everybody.How-wa!I can't do it.How are you?
00:55How are you?My voice is like, how are you?I know.The voice of Howlin' Hank.DJ Howlin' Hank.On efforts for family.You can officially say that we're back.We got some funny shit for you this week.
01:06Season four, everybody.Season four.You heard me on the radio.I have a feeling DJ Howlin' Hank will be making many, many more appearances.I hope so.I love that guy so much.It's not really hard for me to play it.Just play a coke addict DJ.
01:21I mean, that's, you know, just think back into my past.Well, I thought you were, were you oxy pills?What were you?I was, I know, I mean, I mean, I kind of did the whole smorgasbord.Well, let's get back.Where are you from?I'm from Germantown, Maryland, right outside of Washington, D.C.Okay.
01:37Sports affiliations.My podcast listeners have to-Here we go.All crap teams, except for one of them.Washington Redskins, Washington Wizards, and the Stanley Cup Champion WashingtonCapitals.I can't believe I get to say that.It's like the greatest feeling in the world.
01:54And no Orioles, no Nationals.No, I'm an Orioles and a Nationals fan.It kind of splits.I mean, I grew up an Orioles fan, but I loved Brace Harper.And I really just root for the whole town.So I'm a diehard Orioles fan, but I'm also going to root for the Nats.I just want that whole city to win.Are you old enough to have been a Baltimore Colt fan before they left or no?
02:15I was alive, but I was already Redskins.I mean, they left to what, 82, 84, something like that?Something like that, 83, 84, somewhere around there.And I remember, and this is what sucks, is that I remember just from like,from like zero to 10, it was just three Super Bowls.And then at like 11, I think we got our last one, which was in 19-1.The Redskins, yeah.The Redskins.
02:39And then I was just like, oh, we're probably going to be in this all the time.Yeah.And then nothing.Well, that's what's going to happen to like the Patriots in a few years.All these kids who were lucky enough to be born in the 1990s and remember 2000,the first one, 2000, 2001, you know, it's going to be like, you know, there was,there was kids born when I was born in 1968.And then they got to watch Dan Marino.
03:08I mean, I'm just saying, as far as like just being good and competitive,I was compared to Dan Marino because that guy was the best I ever saw.Yeah.Other than Joe Montana.But even then, I think Dan Marino with Bill Walls, he definitely wins one.I only remember, I only remember bad knees, Marino.That's, that's where I was.Bad back, bad knees.
03:25He's a killer.Well, just bad everything.When I got in, he was already in the, in the down trial years.I always felt with him, he came in and he was with Don Shula and Don Shula like.It was a man.Shula was a man.But by then everybody had caught up with them, stolen all his fucking tricks.And he was on like his, he was in the final 10 years of going back to like,
03:49like the 19, like fifties.I want to say he was on the Giants at one point and he was offensive,a defensive coordinator.And the other guy was Tom Landry.Okay.Those were the two guys or something like that.I want to know, I always forget who the hell it was.But anyways, I just remember, you know, they went from Bob greasy to fucking Dan
04:06Marino's and they just kicked our ass for like the first 20 years of me watchingthe Patriots.He just couldn't take it.And I look at the Dolphins fans now, like they're still waiting for the next DanMarino.Dude, my cousin is the biggest Dolphins fan.He named his dog Marino.Like he fucking loves this team so much.
04:30And it was like, I remember the beginning of the season, I was like, dude, they'relooking good.They're winning some games.And he's like, they're going to fuck it up.And then boom, it's just what they finished like seven and nine.They're a seven and nine team.I mean, I can't talk.The Redskins are what, like six and 10.
04:46I gave up.Once all four of our quarterbacks broke a leg.I was like, all right.I was like, we deserve it.Racist team name.We can't, you can't be four and 12 with a racist team name.You got to be 12 and four.We can't help it.
05:04I will say this though.I still can't believe in all of this, this fucking hashtag and all this shit.The fact that they still do the Tomahawk chop all like, I can't believe it.All of that fucking, it's so fucking bad.It's so fucking bad.And they sit there like, it does.I love when white people justify it.Like it's literally the people are saying, don't do it.
05:24Yeah, they're like, but we're honoring the heritage.Like no.I always compare it.It's cause we committed genocide.Who's kidding?Who against those people?That would be like if the Germans won and then at the soccer game, everyone wasstanding, oh, he may, oh, he may.
05:41You know what's funny too is that, whoa, is old school Hollywood imitating their singingand all that whole thing on so many fucking levels.It's just like, dude, what can you just, and they just, they fucking refuse.And I don't know.That's why that's, there's like a backlash now on white privilege.Like there's people going out there and do what?But just there's white people saying that white privilege doesn't exist, which is fucking.And then you listen to their stories and all their stories are is basically that they weren't
06:14born rich, but at no point was ever, Hey, I was driving on the street and because I waswhite, I got pulled over, tased and then shot to death.Yeah.And then the cop got free.The cop was released.There's none of that.There's none of that.Yeah.
06:30And like, dude, there's, there's like, look, there's to sit there and act like there aren'tprivileges.And everything.There's all different levels to be in white.And there's, and there's shit.That is, if you're just like a regular white guy, shit that you see the private schoolwhite kid doing, you know, that pisses me off.I mean, I grew up different levels of black people.
06:49You know, there's a hoax.For sure.Yeah.I grew up, I grew up middle class, a little note, lower middle class.And it's just like, I had that friend that just like, dude, I had a friend who was likesuper rich.His dad worked for the FDA, right?This kid always had money.
07:02That family always had money.His dad went into a lone star.Remember that, that steakhouse where they put like either give you peanuts and then youjust throw the shells on the floor, right?His dad slipped on the floor, hurt his knee, got like $10 million.They were already rich.Like that's, that's the kind of shit that should happen to my dad.Cause he had to happen to my dad.
07:22I just remember when being in New York city one time and there was this publicist whofucking snapped or something out on and she was out like, I want to say she was out inthe Hamptons, Long Island and or some somewhere out there.Okay.She snapped cause something about some club or a restaurant and she backed into like 17fucking people drove away.Oh, that's horrible.Drove the fuck away.
07:47They got a license plate.They knew who or she was and the cop showed up and the lawyer was in the driveway, metthe cops and said she'll turn herself in tomorrow morning.I just remember reading that going like, what the fuck?How is that possible?What level is that?What is that?Yeah.
08:05But so to sit there and act like, I don't know, like I, it's fucking hilarious.It is hilarious.Yeah.It's ridiculous.But every, but the thing is back with the Redskins.I used to work in a warehouse and unloading trucks.It's just like, I know, but there was no point that anybody ever look at you and like, youhave white skin.
08:23Get out of this neighborhood.Yeah.They just let him be.That's the thing with the Redskins though, is that it's, it's every, every like six years,a senator or a congressman says, you got to change the name.And I completely agree.At this point, I'm like, just change the name.I can't believe the owner wouldn't do it considering.
08:40I honestly don't notice now because it's just been called that for so fucking long.But you gotta look at this.You gotta look at the owner is, for example, we have one of the worst owners in footballbecause he's like Jerry Jones just doesn't know anything about football.So he's fucking the team up.He's causing all these problems, you know, and, and he wants money so bad that you wouldthink that he would change the name to get all the merchandising money.Like, dude, that's like another, you know, hundred million dollars worth of shit.
09:08Like if that pays for a new, you know, parking lot, here's an argument that I've been, I'vebeen, I've been, something that I've been wondering about for a long, for a while now.And I think I kind of understand it where in every sport, like I like major league baseball,I thought they counted World Series titles back to the 18 80s, but the first one theycounted was 1903, which I think was the Boston Red Sox.I literally looked it up last week.I already forget, but like they come though all the way back to fucking 1903.All right.
09:40When it was a segregated league, all of this shit, right?Like, you know, crazy leg Johnson.It was fucking 10.I loved him.10 teams or whatever.Right.Stanley Cupcos were about that far back NBA titles goes back to the 1940s and even theLakers count an NBL title.
09:57They somehow won an N and a title in the NBL and that was counted as a fucking NBA title.Was that when they were the Minneapolis Lakers?Yeah.They're first of, of they, they won an NBL and then they won four NBA titles in Minneapolis.And, uh, but they, they, for some reason count that one, but Super Bowls, they onlystarted in 1968 and what kills me.Oh, I saw you post something about this.Yeah.
10:23It's just like, so you're telling me and people are saying, because it's, I guess becausethey call it a merger, but it was like the AFL came in.It was like the XFL or the USFL or the world football league.It was just this other competing football league and the NFL laughs going near some fucking,you know, piece of shit league, but it was early enough on, I guess where they, you know,and they made enough moves and had enough money or whatever.And then with the style that they played that they started to compete with them.And then they played them in the first two games, Super Bowl one and two, which were
10:54called NFL AFL championship game.And they got the shit kicked out of them because they weren't as good a league.And then, then the AFL one in Super Bowl three, which was still not called a Super Bowl.It was still the AFL NFL championship.All right.Yeah.So then after that, they agreed to merge all the owners agreed in the AFL to merge withthe NFL.
11:17Al Davis was the only one he wanted to put the NFL out of business because he was fuckingAl Davis.Which is why, which is why I gotta love him.Right.So, and then at that point they just go, all right.So those first three games against the AFL NFL, that's when we're going to start, I guessbecause they called it a merger rather than, but I mean, like the ABA in a way merged withthe NBA.
11:38And they still count all that shit back to the 1940s.They only took some teams.They only took some teams from the ABA.They didn't take everybody.Okay.But still, but still, it was, it was a competing league that was fucking with their numbersand they had a more exciting game just like the AFL.And then in the end, the NBA at, you know, it was losing too many players to it.
11:59Same way was the NFL at some point.It's like, can't beat him, join him.And then they came together, but they still count all those Celtics championships in the60s and all that.So it's like, you're telling me that Johnny Unite, John Unites, I got to look at him ina certain way or in all of the, in half of those fucking teams, the Browns, the Rams,the Bears, the Packers, the Giants, all of those fucking teams were in the NFL, playingeach other.
12:22Sure.There was, it was actually in a way you could say, you know, I guess you can't say it wasmore talent than, but I'm just saying like, I don't, I don't get why they just wipe thataway.They don't fucking talk about it at all.And that the Steelers with six fucking champ in 2018, six championships.Yeah.Like it's so fucking ridiculous that, that the Patriots, right?
12:45If we win Sunday, which would be next Sunday, which would be fucking awesome.We would be tied for the most championships one in NFL history.And we've got our first one fucking 17 years ago.That doesn't, that doesn't make, and you're, that doesn't make any fucking sense.That's stupid.I see where you're coming from, but at the same time, you know, we're going by SuperBowl one.I think, listen, I'm not a Patriots fan.
13:11I think they have in the, in the, since they started winning them and what 2001, was thatthe first one?Yeah.I mean, they're, they're definitely one season.They're definitely, you know, one of the strongest team, but all the people that wantto fight and put up the fight about saying that, you know, well, I saw that thing thatguy posted the Green Bay has like, we've got like 14 or whatever.But here's Green Bay though.
13:35Green Bay's won four Super Bowls and they won like fucking 11 NFL titles.They've been winning the entire fucking time.Yeah, but they just haven't won in a minute.I mean, how long has it been since Green Bay's won?2005?Something like that?No, like nine or 10 or something.Okay.
13:51You're right.Yeah.But I'm not talking about that.Well, then why would you fucking count the Broncos having won it in 20 years?So what?Those theirs don't count.No, they, no, no, they count.I'm saying they count, but I just thought you were getting mad about somebody posting
14:02that Green Bay had X amount because they were included in the earlier ones.No, that's my argument.They should keep those.Yeah.But those should fucking count.If the fucking Montreal Canadians can count when they fucking beat somebody playing ona pond.Oh, I didn't know which angle you were going with.
14:18I thought you were going against.I thought you were saying to fuck those people for it.Okay, then I love the history of the game.The NFL has been the NFL and a bunch of fucking leagues have tried to, to, to compete withthem.They've never, they've never been able to.The best you ever had was the AFL merged with them, but it was still called the NFL.It wasn't called the AFL.
14:41It wasn't called the NFL slash AFL like serious XM or whatever.Right.Yeah.It was called the fucking NFL.You joined the NFL.Yeah.So those other championships were NFL championships because now you call it the fucking Super Bowl.Sure.
14:57It was still the two best teams and those, you know, before the AFL existed, those werethe two fucking best teams up with that fucking classic Giants Colts game played in fuckingYankee stadium.The winner of that it can't, can't fucking walk up to somebody who won Super Bowl fourand said, I know what that feels like.They know exactly what it feels.A lot of people are dying off, but yeah, they know what it feels like a hundred percent.That's a great point.
15:21They are dying.I don't know.I, I count them.I, the Green Bay Packers are the fucking New York Yankees.And I think the Giants are next and that's the way it should be.Did I think it was, well, the Redskins are up there.The Redskins have, we have three of three.And then we had, I think we had like four of the world championship ones too.
15:42All right.I'm going to give you some trivia.Where did the Rams first start at?Uh, in the city.St. Louis?No.No.Cause I know it was with Los Angeles.
15:54I don't fucking know.Jesus Christ.You know, I love, you just sounded like me in math class a long time ago.That's what I love about you.Is that you?I know, I know sports, but dude, you know fucking stuff.You know fucking sports.Like you like, I can imagine.
16:10I know up to a point because I used, I used to know fucking everybody in the league.And I just don't have time anymore.So I, I don't know, but they started off in Cleveland and I've never understood why theywere called the Rams.I don't know that there was any Rams in there.Um, all right, let's, let's look up.What am I looking at?Washington Redskins.
16:29What's your fight song?Hail to the Redskins.Hail victory.Braves on the war path.Fight for old DC.Oh, there you go.And then it goes into some weird thing.Running dust and jumping.
16:48There's a lot more.Steve, a double Duba.Let the point so far.All right.Here you go.NFL championships.Pre 1970 merger.You got two.
17:02All right.Five's pretty good.I'll take it.Yeah.So you got five.So right now it's for the way I look at it.You're tired with the Patriots.We got five Super Bowls.
17:11You got, you got five champion.We got, we have five championships.I wish everybody thought like you.Cause a lot of people don't do a lot of people.You fucking people have ever said that.I completely agree with what you're saying.If the, if the one before it was the official Super Bowl, it's still a championship.Unfortunately, a lot of those people have died.
17:34Yeah.Who would care?I guess.Let's see here.Yeah.All right.League championships.All right.
17:45The NFL champ.Pre 1970s.The Giants won four.So they've won four NFL titles and they won four Super Bowl titles.You go to the stadiums, they're nowhere to be found.They're not listed.It's like it never fucking happened.I don't, I don't see the angle you're coming with right now.
18:03And I respect the, what you're saying, dude, a hundred percent.That's not fair.I'm not saying it's not fair.Well, no, it's just, it's not fair.I'm just, I'm just asking why.Why won't you buy the championships?Dude, league championship.Chicago Bears.
18:19Okay.They won fucking nine 19, 21, 19, 32, 33, 40, 41, 43, 46, 1963.And then they won a Super Bowl 1985.And all they have is one fucking banner hall hanging over their stadium.Check one of the scores when they beat the Redskins in one of those league championships.It's like, it's like crazy fucking lopsided.Like 70 to 78.I'm not mistaken.
18:44So I don't know a lot about sports, about facts, but I do know that that is right.All right.Let's look up the Los Angeles Rams.All right.Are you nervous?Are you nervous about Sunday?Oh yeah.Always.
18:59I'll tell you what's the funniest thing.My Verzi texted me and he's like, dude, Todd Gurley.Is it Todd Gurley?Todd Gurley.Yeah.He goes, he's hurt.And in my head, I'm like, dude, there's no way to stand up comedians know the injurystatus of the key running back for the Rams.
19:13If I got a guy on the inside.Yeah.Who's your guy on the inside?ESPN.com.This is my, if he was really fucking hurt, we wouldn't know.They would keep that under wraps.But he was hurt in the last game.I saw him on the bike for a little bit.
19:29I know, but here's the thing.Everybody's hurt this time of year.They all said he's got two fucking weeks to recover.He's going to fucking play.If they're leaking it out that he's hurt, that means he's way better than they thoughthe was going to be.Cause that's just good.Oh, he's hurt.
19:44But they know Belichick is going to be like, well, I guess we don't have to prepare forTodd Gurley.But it was just funny.Oh no, he showed up.Yeah.I felt championships pre 1970.The Rams, they won in 45 and 51 and then they won in 1999 and they were the York ClevelandRams from 1936 to 1942.
20:06They took 43 off to finish off the Germans in the Japanese 1944 1945.That was the last year.And then they moved to Los Angeles.They stayed there till 94 came back to 2016, which brings me to something I was making funof and a lot.Did you see, do you watch the Saints Rams game?All right.Everybody thought the worst fucking thing in that was that fucking helmet to helmet, no
20:27pass interference call.The worst thing in that game was when they cut to the stands after the Rams one and yousaw those guys in the Rams jerseys in their twenties, maybe early thirties crying.I saw that.Yes, I didn't see that.Girlfriends were trying to comfort them.It's just like, buddy, you were fucking two years old when they moved away.Like what are you doing here?
20:48You've been waiting since 2016.It's just, listen, you're fucking crying.Bill, when you, because you remember how what happened when we watched, because you watchedthe Caps game with me when they won the cup or you were on my computer.I was in London.You were in London, but I was FaceTiming you so you could watch the game.Everybody was asleep and I was pitch black and I was in the bathroom of my hotel.My wife and daughter were sound asleep and I was going, dude, I'm so happy for you.
21:18I was sitting there going like, I did.Congratulations.I was FaceTiming with you and you had your fucking TV on.But you were like, congratulations, buddy.My wife probably thought I was the greatest feeling in the world.Trust me.I know it.But my wife probably thought I was in there talking to a hooker.
21:35Okay, everybody's asleep.Oh man, it's so beautiful.It's so beautiful.But what was, but what was so funny is if you would have seen me and I mean, like I rememberin 91 with the Redskins one, but I remember the day after because my mom was watchingthe game and then the, uh, my mom made a bunch of, of her famous Super Bowl chili and I atea bunch of it and then I fell asleep in a laundry basket.Uh, I was 11 and then I didn't get another championship until this Caps won and we were
22:10watching it together and you were facing the screen and I remember I was just likecheering as the clock ran down and then the, remember it stopped for a second.There was like a stop at your play at like 0.06 seconds.So I was screaming and then I got quiet and then they win the game and everybody'srunning on the ice and I'm just dead silent.I thought I was like, am I dead inside?What is wrong with me?And then they brought the cup out and dude, I just started weeping, just weeping
22:39dude.Just like, why does it matter so much?It's so super.It's everything.It's just all the, it's all, dude, it's everything.It's all the, it's all the, it's all the, you know, the times that they, they chunkedit before when they were supposed to win and all the times that, you know, they, they,they just, you put so much into it and to finally get it just was so sweet, man.
23:04And it was like, I started thinking about like, this is, I'm going to go really likeJohn Cougar melon camp here.But like, I thought about all like the middle class people that live in the Washington DCarea that work these dead end jobs.And then they just, they get that championship because they want it so bad.And that, that team, whether it's the Redskins or the Cavs or whoever, it's like, that'swhat they have to help them escape.And so I, you know, I went full spring senior team raised the cup is just like, I, I, I
23:33kind of was just like, I don't think I'm ever going to see the Bruins do it.And when they finally did it, I watched them from 1980 to 2011.That's how long it took me to what's that 10, 20, 31 years.I watched them.And so from age 12 to what is that 43, when they finally, they finally did it.And I was, I told this story before I was at the Chicago theater on Jim Norton's tourwith Jim Brewer, David Tello, myself on this tour called the anti-social tour.And I watched the first period and a half, then I went on stage and then when I got off
24:09stage, I watched the final seven minutes upstairs in one of those, the green room orsomething like that.And I remember being up there by myself because none of them cared because it wasn't theirteam.And the show ended and they went out to do the meet and greet.And I stayed up there and there was like three minutes left and they scored a goal or it'sjust not enough time for the other team to come back for Vancouver.And I was by myself and I went up like nine octaves.
24:36I was like, oh my God, they're going to do it.And all I wanted to see, they were like, come on, you got to come down from meet and greet.People were saying, where the fuck are you?Calling you a phony for not.I was like, wait a minute.I just had to see them lift it up.I told my wife to tape it.I knew she was taping it.
24:51And just when I saw Zidane, I'll just lift it.I'm just going, yeah.Yeah, dude.Dude, that was 31 years just coming out of you.Just all those years of not being able to get past the Canadians, not being able to winin the forum.Yeah, man.Fucking getting past the Canadians and then run into those fucking Gretzky Edmonton Oilers
25:10and the Marc Messier Edmonton Oilers.And just, and then just, you know, Neely's getting his fucking leg taken out, you know,and Bork having to go somewhere else to win a cop.And it just fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck the lockout.Oh yeah.All of that.It's just everything.It did.
25:28It all just goes through your head and then bam.It's like, you literally feel like they're good.They're just going to like, look at, look at your television screen and go, all right,do you want to hold it up?And you can just like grab it.It's just such an incredible feeling.I have such respect for that trophy.I would never touch it.
25:44I wouldn't even touch it.Why?Because I'm not, because you should be on a team that fucking won.Players who play in the league won't even touch it unless they want it.So me, some fucking asshole.Just walk up.Fucking lift it up and drink it.They're not going to let you lift it up, dude.
26:01They might let you get like a bomb on it, but that's about it.I respect that.I've seen pictures of guys I know that no players and shit and they're like holding it withthem like, what the fuck are you doing with your hands on that?I respect that.No, I respect that.I respect that.I respect that.
26:16You, you appreciate it.Back to back.Back to back with the green beret that saw action and you got your face all painted too.Like you did something.You're paintballing with your paintball gun.I watched you on CNN.Anyways, I got a little bit of advertising here.I have to read.
26:54Let me, let me see here.What do you got?What the fuck?This, this always happens.George Santa Myers.Why does this always happen?Okay.Oh, 1 800 flowers.
27:07Valentine's Day is coming up there, buddy.By now, most of us have started racking our brains about what Valentine's gift is trulygoing to make her day special.Dude, fuck that.Any woman out there fucking racking their brains about what kind of fucking stupid thing they'regoing to get you.No, you know what guys should do?We should get into some, what fucking thing could you pressure them?
27:30We'd be funny like ladies, you know, Valentine's Day, what kind of flat screen TV is thinkingabout some sonos audio.Oh, that's shiny shit with 1 800 flowers.com.It's really not that complicated.Roses from 1 800 flowers are a no brainer.Right now when you order early, 1 800 flowers has amazing deals on vibrant and romanticValentine's Rose bouquets.Is it bouquet or bouquet?
28:00Who says bouquet?It's bouquet.Oh, bouquet.Oh my God.It's bouquet.It's bouquet.I'm going to get a bouquet.Bouquet.
28:09Bouquet.Tomato, tomato or something like that.Arrangements and more starting at 29 99.This is a great thing to do, though, to fucking get this done.Oh yeah, to order ahead of time to get this fucking thing done.And then you then you just then you just find some other stupid bullshit thing that youcan do.You send the flowers to work so everybody she can feel in the game for all of her fucking
28:29friends.You know that that's what it's all about.Oh yeah.You don't send it to the house.You got to send it to a public place.They want people to see stupid.I love this woman.That's what they want.
28:40See, my pussy's better than yours.There are so many unbelievable deals from one 800 flowers, but you have to hurry.Roses roses are red roses from one 800 flowers are picked at their peak and shipped overnightto ensure freshness.I just picture the miserable bastard picking those things.Gorgeous.Does he have any love in his life?Gorgeous Valentine bouquets and arrangements starting at 29 99 is an amazing deal, but
29:10it won't last long bouquet.Prices will be going up soon.So take advantage today, pick your delivery date and let one 800 flowers handle the rest.When it comes to Valentine's, I don't settle for anything less than my rose authority.I guess that's supposed to be me talking one 800 flowers.com to order Valentine's bouquets,arrangements and more starting at 29 99 and go to one 800 flowers.com.Click on the radio icon and enter burby or order today and save at one 800 flowers.comcode burr.
29:43I love how you slowly turned into wail and Jennings towards the end of that.I just get 29 99 and I have to do anything I can because I can't read out loud anythingto keep an eye on it.Dude, I love the bouquets.That's fantastic.Hello.That's like Adobe.There's no basement at the Alam there's no bouquet at the Alamo.
30:03That's my fucking shit.Dude.All right.Hymns.You know what I'm saying?It wasn't us.It was them.That's why I got hymns from that's from the Warriors.
30:11I've never seen the Warriors.It was them.You never seen the Warriors?Never seen the Warriors.I started it and then I fell asleep.I looked like two months ago.I'll get into it one day.Okay.
30:22Hymns.Why do guys turn to weird solutions or do nothing when they can turn to medicine andscience?What are they talking about?Solution.For hymns.com.One stop for hair loss, skin care, sexual wellness.Oh, God.
30:36What the fuck was that?Oh, I turned it on to make sure I knew you were coming.Oh, fuck.I forgot to send that fucking lady a check.All right.What am I doing here?For hymns.A one stop shop for hair loss, skin care, sexual wellness for men.
30:55This is the whole thing, dude.You're going to clear up your skin.You're going to get your client's main bag and you're going to have a fucking blowjob.You're going to hate your audience.Talk about your experience with the product.Well, you don't want to be talking about that.I'm married and I'm fucking bald.Your skin looks great.
31:09Your young girl.Oh, yeah.That's right, dude.Yeah.That's right.Choose one or two copy points to rotate into your spot.Why are they telling me this?Thanks to science, baldness can be optional.
31:20Well, fucking thanks for telling me hymns connect with your, with, connects you withreal doctors and medical, good, real doctors this time and medical grade solutions to treathair loss.Well known generic equivalents to name brand prescriptions to help you keep your hair.No snake oil pills or gas station counter supplements, prescription solutions backedby science.I like that snake oil and gas station solution.Dude, they said that you, but that was from like the 1930s.
31:47They still do that.They go to any, like, any, like, uh, you know, gas station and you can get those like, youknow, black mambas or like just, just like dick pills, whatever dude, they sell them allbehind the counter.Dick pill.That's a good name for a band.Uh, no waiting room, no awkward in-person doctor visits, save hours by going to hymnsforhims.com.So easy.
32:11Answer a few quick questions, doctors will review and can just prescribe you productsor ship direct to your door.All right.Order now.My listeners get a trial of four hymns for just $5 today right now while supplies last.See website for full details.This would cost hundreds.If you went to the doctor or a pharmacy, go to for hymns.com slash burr.
32:33That's f or h i m s.com slash burr for hymns.com slash burr.And lastly, but certainly not lazily stamps.com postage rates have gone up again.Can you believe how many cents it costs to send a fucking envelope from here to fuckingNew York?Stamps.com can ease the pain with big discounts off post office retail rates.Stamps.com makes it easy.They'll send you a free digital scale automatically calculates exact postage.Stamps.com will even help you decide the best class of mail based on your needs.
33:12They'll even give you postage discounts.You can't get at the post office, including five cents off every classes, class stamp.I use stamps.com to send out all my posters.I'm a moron if I can figure it out.So can you right now, my slash our listeners, my listeners, get a special offer that includesa four week trial plus free postage and a digital scale.See for yourself why over 700,000 small businesses use stamps.com.Just go to stamps.com.
33:40Click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and type in burr, b u r r that stamps.combetter burr.Alrighty.Hey, you have a podcast.I do.You know what's funny?I was watching you read that and like you just keep going when you make the mistake.And like when I try to tape stuff like that, if I like, if I fuck up at all, I just like
34:03I'm like, God damn it.And I just like have to start over.It's just seeing you do it so effortlessly.Yeah, perfectionist.Well, you're so comfortable doing it.Well, I do I've established right out of the gate that I'm a moron.Yeah, I got out in front of it.Yeah.
34:17I was like Bill Clinton saw what happened to Gary Hart and you just got out in frontof it.They were just like, did you?He's like, I fucked him all.And then he fucking, you know, yeah, but then he went back to his old ways.I did not have sex with that woman.That's a good Clinton.Dude.
34:34And then if I said, if I went, I, I do not have problems reading out loud.Like that would be the end.I would get impeached.Sure.I'd be, you know, I wouldn't leave just like him.I need to leave my flaws in.That's what it taught me to do.Yeah.
34:47I have a podcast.I love it.Bill, I'm telling you, I love this and more than 500.The 500.It's about stock car racing.It is not about that.It is about the 500 greatest albums of all time.I'm going through Rolling Stone magazine's list of the 500 greatest albums, starting
35:03at 500, working my way down to one.Each week I sit down with a comic actor or musician now, you know, and I give them aweek with the record and then I break the record down and we sit down and talk aboutit.His kiss.Got one in the top five.We did.I just did.
35:22I just did with Jeff Ross.Kiss destroyer.I was going to say, you know, you should, you could have got Steven Adler.Oh, I mean, I've got, I would love to get Steven, but dude, I love this so much, man.Like cause it's not just being able to sit down and talk with my buddies about the albumand ask them questions around like the meanings of the songs and the facts from the record.But dude, since I've started doing this, like I have listened to music that I thought Iwould never listen to, didn't even know about.
35:48And it's like touching me and it's just so incredible.Right now I'm listening to Steve Earl, guitar town.You ever heard of him?Oh, this guy is funny.He's like, he's like the key.This is like his born in the USA, but country record.Dude, I never listened to country.I fucking love this record, dude.
36:06When did it come out 1985?And he has a song called guitar town and it's, it's just, it's just incredible.I mean, well, especially once, you know, the history of this guy and like how he droppedout of school and then went to Nashville, like, you know, to, to find towns, Van Zandtand like was writing songs for people.And then the record company was like, all right, well, we want you to make a record.And he was like, all right, and he's, he just sat down and wrote the first song and thelast song and then just the whole album came together.
36:35But it's like, that's what I love.How many albums does he have?Oh, he's got a shitload.Oh, does he?But I haven't listened to anything else.So he must be real quality cause I don't know who he is.You know what I mean?Cause I don't, I, I figured like, if I know who a country person is for the most part,
36:51they suck because it's going to be like, you just know, like the pop kind of, you know,you don't know.It's like, you know, like if, if, if you were, I don't know, if somebody say, hey, namea speed metal metal band, everybody would know.You'd say motorcycle.That's right.You would say motorcycle.Motorcycle.
37:11No, this is, this is the thing.The guy could have been like enormous, but then he developed like a drug problem andthen kind of fell off.And now he actually still makes music, but country, the country fan base doesn't reallyfuck with him anymore because he leans very left.And I was actually watching a documentary of his cause I'm getting ready to record theepisode with Tom Everett Scott from that thing you do.He played the drummer.
37:40When he came and did it at the jam.And you look at the YouTube comments, you know, of this documentary and it's like, Iused to like his music, but he's a fucking stupid leftist libertard.And it's just like, because they can't accept that, you know, you can play country music,but still lean towards, but it's also why I think, you know, you shouldn't be constantlyputting out your political opinions like, listen, I, I just completely, I completelyagree with that.People, you know, the white privilege thing I like, this is, I make fun of feminists and
38:14shit.I try to be like even handed or whatever.But you know, all you do is just like, nobody, all you do is get people who agree with youto agree with you.And then people who don't agree with you to now hate you and not want to watch somethingthat you do because they can't separate the two.Like I can stay at a fucking Trump hotel and not like Donald Trump.A lot of people can't get past that because in their minds, the people who run the Sheridan,
38:43who were also billionaires for some reason, didn't vote for Donald Trump.Yeah, they're all, they're all the same fucking people.100%.Yeah, but not to mention like, it's just, they're just paying for his name outside thething.It's not like.And it's, I've been in a Trump hotel.They're extremely nice.
38:58Oh, they're incredible.They're incredible.Yeah.I said nice.I mean, everybody knew what I meant.You have to one up me and say incredible.No, it was incredible.I've only stayed at one.
39:07It's fucking.It's fantastic.Like that one up and incredible.What this guy should be doing.Fuck.Yeah, dude.Just stick to hotels.If his presidency was as competent as his fucking hotel, I mean, this, this, we would
39:21be back.He wouldn't make it great again.If his tax cuts were as good as his bath towels, I mean, come the fuck.You know, I was making fun of the other day, somebody said, you know, like there was some,I guess there was some sort of taxing out there if you make $11 million or more andpeople make $11 million or more were complaining.Oh, yeah.So somebody had tweeted that, you know, hey, you know, there's fucking bullshit.
39:46Just pay your fair share.Someone makes $11 million a year doesn't work any harder than somebody who makes 20 granda year.And I was fucking dying laughing.I was like, oh, yeah, they do.Yeah, they do.Yeah, they do.You wonder why a guy making $11 million is getting a fucking divorce is because he never
40:02sees his wife.That's true.That's why he doesn't see his kids.Has a pool.Never been in it.And it's just like, yeah, there's this 24 fucking seven.I've made 20 grand a year.You know what's great?
40:13It's the second the fucking whistle blows.You don't even think about that job.But what's what I think nobody calls you up, hey, Bill, tomorrow when you unload the boxes,could you maybe do it?We need to get a fucking conference call on how you unload the fucking truck.It's just because people don't think that people think of like when you think somebodymakes 20 million a year, like we just know shit from like Falcon crest and dynasty, allthose shows and they're like, they don't do anything to hang out at country clubs and
40:39they piss on us 20,000ers and you have petty, petty fights with people within your family.Yeah, that's all they do.Like nobody sees them like, you know, in the office from, you know, from six a.m. untillike three a.m. and then they go home like walking to their kid's room, the kid's sleeping.They should a single teardrop falls and then they go bang the maid and go to sleep.That's kind of why that's what I assume happens.I have no idea.I grew up lower middle class.
41:05But I love, I, what I love about this podcast is that I would do this if nobody was listeningbecause I wanted to listen to, to these albums and I started to, I was just gonna, I wantedto feel inspired.I think I was just musically tapped out and, and I was like, all right, I'm going to listento an album a day over 500 days and I started posting about it.And when I got to like 498, which was like on the third day, Jim Jefferies reached outto me.He's like, dude, he's like that stone roses record is one of my favorite records.
41:38He's like, oh, the stories that I think of when I hear that music.And then it like hit me.And I was like, that's the podcast I've been waiting to do is a great voice.He can sing, he's incredible voice.But he came on and he did, and he did that episode and that's basically what it is.It's like, you know, we're going to go through these great records and we're going to talkabout them.We're going to, I'm going to, I'm going to ask you need more than a day.
42:05No, I give them a week.He just pointed right at me.No, a week.I give you a week.Yeah.Well, you did it.You did.But I thought you only took a day to listen to it because you're so busy because you're
42:15making $12 million.So you're out.I'm making $11 million and $1 a year, 11 million and one.So I was the one who complained.I can tell it was you.It was.So, but what it is is like, I give every comic or actor, whoever it's going to be a weekwith the record and then I break the album down and like ask them questions about their
42:38life using the meaning of the songs, the facts from the record.So, so the album is really just like the celery and the carrots and the onions of the soup.But it's really just, you know, the basis for me to have a really, you know, funny ordeep or whatever the fuck it is.It's just a good conversation.When you run out of those albums over that, no, I know how you do it.What do I do next?You do the 500 albums that should have been in the top 500.
43:06That'll be in 9.6 one years and that's not a bad idea.But I might just be, you know, I think I'm going to retire it on May 31st, 2028.Oh, that's what we're going to have.My goal is on the final episode to have Oprah.I don't know why, but it's just, it's my white whale.What's the number one?Washington Pepper is a Lonely Hearts Club band.Then it's, then it goes to number one album, number one, then, then number two is Pet Sounds
43:38and then number three, I think is Revolver.This is white rock.The number one white rock in the top 10, no, Marvin Gaye is in the top 10.Marvin Gaye is number six.Marvin Gaye, what's going on?But it's, it's all over the place.The like album 500 was Alcaste, Queminine and then 499.What they're probably saying is because the Beatles, who really went rogue and started
44:03their own Beatles were essentially a boy band.And then they, that's, yeah.And then they took control of their careers with a lot of people because the Beatles nowget a ton of shit by people being like, you know, like they, there's like people who thinkthey stink.Like I've, I've listened to who thinks the Beatles stink?Dumb people.Well, they're, they're dumb.
44:22Yeah.I'm not saying you can't be into them.They don't move you or whatever.I mean, it's been a long time.That's, that's, that's like saying Count Basie stakes or something like, no, it's just like,no, yeah.They don't, that's the thing is that somebody like my age, I'm 39, like I, I, you know,was born in 79.
44:37So I wasn't really alive during the Beatles era.And from what I've been told and everything I've read, like there will never be an artistas big as the Beatles were.Like they were enormous.Like we can't even, what it was was they broke out of what usually binds you and they tookcontrol of their career and started their own label.And then when they should have fizzled out, they made this left turn where they reinventedthemselves, you know, when they started doing drugs and grew their hair and all that shit
45:09and rubber soul.And then, yeah, and revolver and all that stuff.And then when that kind of went to, they were, now what the fuck do we do?It's like, all right, let's just play characters.Now we'll be these, these guys, how would these guys do that?So during that time, Marvin Gaye, I think he was stuck in the Motown shit and he'sgot to sing what they're writing for him.And by the seventies, you know, he was doing what they did as far as he kind of broke away.
45:36It's like, well, I want to sing about what I'm thinking about rather than doing my versionof she loves you.Yeah, yeah, yeah.Well, he's doing like her to through the grapevine and all that stuff, which I still love allthe songs.But then he wanted to go like deeper.So maybe they think that that's cause.Well, Sergeant Pepper, I was, I think what's going on is a better record than Sergeant
45:56Pepper.Yeah.I mean, it's, listen, the, all of these, all of this whole list is completely, youknow, yeah, it's, it's, it's all over the, it's designed to do this.It's, it's, there's your, you got like, because of the way they made it, because I've alreadyhad this discussion with people is like, 20 years ago today, Sergeant Pepper dropped thebed to play, let it go in and out of style, got to skip a lot, but down to down to you.The one and only Billy, she is.
46:27Yeah.Ski, but deeper, ski, but do, but do something like that.One of the best moments we've had on the jam is when Jim Jefferies sang that first timehe did it.He did Sergeant Pepper and then into with a little help from my friends and he was wearinga jacket that he bought at John Var Vados, that the only reason he bought it's the gaudiest,like most expensive, weirdest jacket you've ever seen in your life and it costs like $10,000.And he only bought it because he was at this John Var Vados like event and he put it on
47:00to laugh about it.And then Ringo Star walked by and went, you look good in that.So he was like, well, I got to buy it now.I mean, if a beetle tells you you look good in something, it's like, you got to fuckingup.Get the fuck up.Ringo Star was there.Ringo's always at like Var Vados events.
47:15He wears all that like interview with the vampire clothing.Yeah.It wasn't an event.It wasn't a store.Not it did.No, no.So it was an event.I spaced halfway through the okay, but it's great.
47:29It's great.So what I'm saying is, is that, you know, Sergeant Pepper was this huge thing for theBeatles because what was the coat?What did it have on?Oh my God.I'll send you a picture of the story.It was like an alligator gold style, like, like rock jack.I don't even know what you'd call it.
47:48Just like a piece of that.If he buys it, was it a Beatles coat?No, it was just a John Marvado.He was, he was seriously saying he looked good in that fucking coat.He was just saying to John, he was saying to Jim that you look good in it.And so he told him, you know, he's like, you look good.So Jim bought it.That's the story.
48:04It was boring the second time.It was interesting.The first time when you spaced out, but everybody's laughing that, you know, I'm not fuckinglistening to problem.We're not paying attention or whatever.You didn't think that when I sang Johnny Paycheck, take this job andtake this job and shove it, I'm a demon, I'm a demon new.What Josh has been trying to get me to do.
48:27You're going to do it.He wants you.Motherfucker.You are going to do this.He wants me to get a brown curly wig, go out on stage is Don Henley.And then he wants me to play drums and sing Hotel California.I'm a duck.There's a highway.
48:43Yeah.I can't sing dude.You can.I'm going to help you.I'm going to help you.And the crowd's going to help you.So everybody knows, because Bill's talked about it.I do a show called the goddamn comedy jam where comedians do stand up.
48:53They tell a story about a song and then they sing it.Bill has done it.You've done it more than fucking like anybody.Nobody counts it because it was pre the NFL AFL murder show.They don't call back.But we had my birthday coming up and I asked you, I was like, could you please do thatand you said, I'm going to do it.And then you called me and you give me one of your, I've gotten this call a few times
49:22where it's like, Josh, dude, I got too much shit going on.I can't learn this fucking song.Don't make me learn this fucking song.I can play the song, but the fact that I have to sing along with it and I can't sing.But you, you understand that's a song that's so popular.The second you start playing it, the whole audience is going to fucking join in withyou and then you can just kind of mimic it and, and then I'll be singing in the bassplayer will be singing.
49:46I mean, I'll need like all the fucking lyrics in front of me like it's, it's going to bea shit show.I think I could do it.I think, you know, I can make that happen.We listen.There's one in March.I got one coming up March 20th.We haven't done one in a while.
49:59Yeah, dude.Like my schedule doesn't open up again until fucking April.Like I'm just, I'm straight.I don't want the fuck happened, dude.I got in this business to not work and now we're doing, we're doing efforts for family.Man, I gotta be cannot wait, right in shit.We're already up to episode three.We're cruising.
50:15That's great.Yeah.We're cruising, but I mean, yeah, it takes a lot, a lot of time.All right.Let's get into some point.I will sing hotel California.I just wanted you to do that one part where it's like, boom, boom, boom.Yeah.
50:42On the Tim Bali.All right.Body shaming.We got people right in and then they, for some reason they wanted advice.I know this goes down.All right.Body shaming.Yo, Billy Brown shirt.
50:57I don't know what Brown shirt means.It wasn't that the people is sympathetic to fucking Hitler.I have no idea.What brown shirts, what brown shirts?Wait a minute.I got to look at it.You got to Google it.That's something political.
51:08Maybe they just saw you in a picture that you posted in a brown shirt and they are,they're just rhyming it.Brown shirt.Dude, they've said so many weird things like Billy elbows or Billy Dingledong.Yeah.So they just made it up.No.Brown shirts political.
51:29Nazi parties, original parliamentary play a significant role in Adolf Hitler's riseto power.Oh, I guess all he needed was brown shirts.See, that's what the internet's stupid because I just, I just fucking grazed over all thatgrazed, breezed, grazed.All right.Yo, Billy Brown shirt.I vomited a little of my mouth halfway through your tirade against fat cunts.
51:53I don't remember doing this.Those who don't conform to your body dysmorphic ideal should get therapy and sort out theirlives.Did I say that?Guys, you have to understand something like I have to do an hour usually by myself andwhatever topic comes up, I have to destroy it because I'm trying to make you laugh.Anyways, I haven't heard anything less healthy come out of your mouth for some time.All right.
52:19You know something dude?All the, I vomited a little bit in my life.The fact that I'm supposed to literally take what you're saying seriously and you're speakingin sound bites.Let me guess, then did you shake your head before you rolled on the floor laughing yourass off?Anyways, if my partner thought my weight was a deal breaker, I'd thank her for the honestglimpse into her vacant prison soul and abandoned her in a heartbeat.
52:48No, you wouldn't.You overly sensitive jackass in a heartbeat to the Greyhound inspired Instagram influencersand consumer program.Nealists, you seem to champion diversity is not a mental illness, but body shaming isGod.Yeah.Wow.I gotta, I gotta, I gotta like that's, that's worded so much in that speak that I don't even
53:13believe that that's true.No, they're just throwing buzzwords together.Brown shirt, all of that type of stuff.Oh, now I see why they call you Billy Brown shirt.Like I'm a man.They're mad at you.Yeah.They're mad at you.
53:27No, cause what it was, was there was a guy who was with some chicks.She had a little meter and a bones, whatever.And he was, went into it thinking I should probably fucking lose it eventually.I don't know why I thought that people tend to just get fatter.Yeah.Yeah.People do tend to age.They'd be like, this guy has a little gray hair.
53:42Maybe it's going to turn brown.No, it's going to fuck.It's going to get more gray.Yes.So what happens is, but she was putting it on at what he considered to be an alarmingrate.So he wanted to stay with her, but he needed to know how to approach to ask her in a politeway to stay in shape.
53:59Well, here's what all these, or not least gain way, here's what all these proud fatpeople are not doing.They're killing themselves.So if somebody does an intervention and then the thing about fatties is they'll fuckingsit there and I'll talk about how addiction, food addiction and all that is no differentthan drug addiction.I completely agree with you.I completely agree with you.
54:17You have an intervention with people to be like, you're killing yourself with this heroin.So I have a friend.For some reason with big max, you can't fucking be like, Hey, why don't you lay off your fuckingchicken tenders there?So I have a friend that just had a kid, my buddy, and he was, he lost a little bit ofweight because he had prediabetes, but he's putting it back on again.And like we had a thing tonight.And I was like, I was like, Hey man, like you, you know, you look like you're putting
54:45on more weight.And he goes, Yeah, you know, it's just the stress and blah, blah, blah.I'm like, I know, but you know, we're celebrating your kid's birthday.It's just, you should just, you know, and he, and he wants to it.It's like that by saying that it's just that reality check just to let him know.I'm not shaming him, but I don't think he's shaming his girlfriend either that, that,you know, that dude that wrote in.So it's, it's just kind of like, Hey, you know, it's like you said, it's health.
55:09You know, it's, you gotta, you gotta stop, you know, yeah, fucking just, you gotta beexercise.If you want to live, you gotta exercise and take care of yourself.What you eat is fuel.It doesn't need to be delicious every time.I'm not gonna say his name, but a guy I knew a couple of years ago, yeah.The last time I saw him, I saw him sit down, I go, this guy does not look good.And he was not eating healthy food and he fucking dead a month later.
55:33Fuck.Yeah.Dude.And it's just like, but you're not supposed to say something.If somebody was addicted to heroin and I got a temper and shit, my wife can step inon that, but there's something about like, you know, being fat.These people are just like, no man, I'm a fucking eight.You've just been convinced by, like they take it like you're saying they're not beautiful
55:54people.It's like, you know, if I just thought you were just some fat shit, you know, I don'tknow.It wasn't my fucking idea either, man.So yeah.Yeah.You can go fuck yourself with all your stupid, like that all, all of that.So you want to talk about brown shirt, the way this whole thing is written.
56:07This is the kind of person that tries to make you lose your job.A million percent.They're very active on Yelp.Yeah.All right.NFL titles.Hey, pasty pigs being pigskin professor.You've asked about Super Bowl titles versus NFL champions.
56:22Oh, great.Maybe this person has the solution.The issue here is not the answer.It's the question.If someone asks which team have never won a Super Bowl, it has a different answer thanif someone asks which team has never won an NFL championship, even a complicated more,you could ask who's never won a league championship, which also includes AFL championships andother leagues.
56:45All right.I understand all of this.For official NFL champions from 1920 to 1932, there was no championship game.The championship champion was decided by the best record only.Okay.Now, none of this is answering my question.That's like back in the day when baseball, all those World Series that they count, youknow, you know, winning the pennant was back in the year, back in the day.
57:06You had the end of the regular season.If you had the best record in the American League, you won the pennant.There was no playoff.Yeah.And then you went to the championship.You went to the World Series.Yeah.So all those years, the Yankees won all those fucking titles.
57:18They had one playoff series to win.It wasn't this divisional.It wasn't three rounds of playoffs, which people have to do now.Were they doing, but were they doing when they got to that World Series was how manygames was it?Was it five?That was seven.That was seven games.
57:331900s, where it was best, it was best five out of nine.That's five out of nine.Yeah.Fuck.Dude, that would go into like December if they did that now.Like, I think the Red Sox, 1903, we won that World Series five games to three.Game eight, man.It's game eight coming to your house for game eight.
57:53Um, anyways, from 1933 to 1969, there was a championship game and the winner of thatwas the NFL champion.From 1966 on that champion went on to play in the Super Bowl and the winner was calledthe world champion.That's not true.66, 67, 68, the end of those seasons or whatever those are, 66, 67, 68, 69, whatever it was,those first three against the AFL was called the AFL NFL title was not called the SuperBowl.
58:20Later on retroactively, it was named the Super Bowl from 1960 to 69 AFL had champions.That's true.They aren't counted as NFL history, but they are counted as the team's history.If you are asking how many, yes, okay, uh, from 1966, 69, the NFL AFL champions playedthe Super Bowl.This guy's just telling me shit.They didn't play the Super Bowl.It was renamed that this email should be called facts.
58:46Yeah.Just facts, facts, facts, facts, facts.Okay.So in 1966, the AFL champ was the Kansas City Chiefs, the NFL champ was the Green Bay Packers.This is the plus one league championship for each team.Chiefs lost when they played in the first NFL if, so they didn't get a Super Bowl win,but they still the AFL champion.I understand all of this.
59:09I understand all of this.None of that cleared anything up.I'm saying, why don't they count those?Yeah.It's like you go to the stadium, like the AFL merged to be part of the NFL.You're saying that at any, at most NFL stadiums, there are no trophies to represent the leaguechampionship.Yes.
59:36If you look at the flow, I'm sure in the somewhere in the stadium, maybe they'll have,they'll have that, but it's just like, you know, when you go to, uh, you know, you goto fucking Red Sox family park.I mean, we have our banners right down the thing, 1903 to fucking 2018.Yeah.And everybody has all of their, their, all of them count.No, that, that's, sir, I appreciate it was fun to read all that history, but that didn'tanswer my question.
01:00:04Why aren't they counted?I mean, when it comes to the Super Bowl, man, it's just, if it's not in there's those wordssuper and bowl aren't before them, they, they just, they act like it didn't happen.They act like it didn't happen.Yeah.Well, I mean, it's just, you could still say championships, but I, I completely seewhat you're saying right now.It's kind of fucked up.
01:00:26They always said about the Eagles.They've never won a Super Bowl.The last thing they won was an NFL title.It's like, yeah, well that was the peak of fucking 1960.They were the best fucking football team out there.And you're talking about it like it would, like they, they, they, they lost the election.Yeah.I don't know.
01:00:42Anyways, living in Wyoming, Hey, Billy, city, city, city slicker.I was listening to some older podcast episodes and came across a rant you had about Wyoming.I like Wyoming.I didn't remember what I said, like these people, they just find tidbits.I live in Wyoming.I got to say you are not too far off.I listen to the podcast every week while I feel my cows off, feed my cows off the backof a flatbed truck.
01:01:11Shut up.I know this guy's fucking me.Last week we killed a problem mountain lion and next weekend we'll be entering into acompetitive coyote hunt.I live in the absolute middle of fucking nowhere.This sounds amazing.This guy, this guy listens to Steve Earl.Yeah.
01:01:25But this guy is way more interesting at a party than I am.I do stand up comedy.Oh yeah.What did you do?You know, I saved five of our sheep, you know, from a mountain lion by, uh, by just peggingit off.I came in third in the coyote hunt nationals.I want to talk to that guy.
01:01:41The nearest town population is 3000 miles and it's 40 miles away.Also just to clear the air, most of the billionaire cunts live up in Jackson.And the rest of Wyoming, oh, that's what I was saying.I still want to be the douche in Hollywood that gets a place in Wyoming.And the rest of Wyoming pretty much discounts Jackson as being part of the state anyways,all pretty much discounts that is being part of the state, partially unrelated.I finished getting my pilot's license last year and hope to start on my helicopter ratingwithin the next year.
01:02:11Good for you.My family has used a bell jet ranger to hunt coyotes.Jesus, how much more of an advantage do you need for three generations now?And I'm ready to start flying the heli.Do you have like one of those fucking Vietnam guns?Hey, how do you shoot a dough?Easy.You just don't lead him as much.
01:02:31Am I ready to start flying the heli to carry on the, oh, and I'm ready to start flyingon the other carrying the tradition.So cheers to a fellow pilot.That's cool as shit.I just wanted to let you know there's at least one kind listen to your podcast in Wyomingand love all the shit you put out.Thanks to go fuck yourself.That's cool, man.
01:02:47I'm trying to get eight hours a month flying.Have you been flying a lot recently?I got 7.9 for this month and I'm flying tomorrow morning.And when are you going to take me up, dude?When I have over 300 hours and I'm going to do a little bit of instrument training andjust get better at it and like do some full, I would do full downs and the whole fuckingthing before I would ever take up my first passenger.And I love you too much to have you be my first passenger, but there's a few people in
01:03:13my life that I like.So I'll be taking them up first.Okay.I believe that.You know what I mean?It's just like, do I want to kill this guy or this guy?Wait, dude, it's like Sophie's choice with a helicopter.Are we going to go?
01:03:25We're going to go to see Iron Maiden in Las Vegas and then that should be like the timethat we do that.Just round to the hills.All right.P.S.If you want to try a new cigar, check out Deadwood Tobacco Company out of Deadwood, SouthDakota.The sweet Jane is my favorite cigar I have ever smoked.
01:03:46See you.You see it.What the fuck?Well, I mean, some guy out there in the fucking range, shooting coyotes, I bet he knows whatit is.Smoking at Deadwood.Yeah.That sounds fucking pretty cool to me.
01:03:57All right.We got to wrap this thing up too.We got some smoking to do.Smoking to do.All is good.It's an hour, three minutes.Perfect.All right.
01:04:05Drone.Yo, Billy up there.You were talking about a drone last week that would taxi people around sounded like theone you mentioned was unmanned.Check this thing out.57 batteries.Yeah, dude.That is, I was joking about that fucking thing, dude.
01:04:17They're going to do this thing rather than deal with the population problem.The next thing they do is have like, like, like it looks like a, it looks like a helicopterand you just get in it.There's nobody in there and it'll just like take you across to LA.Now, first of all, I would think it would be super expensive unless it's electric unlessyeah, uh, uh, Elon Musk can make the thing.But dude, you know, your fucking laptop crashes, your phone craps out on you.I was joking like, dude, you're going to fly somebody like over a like the level of
01:04:44insurance.Like how are you going to do that?I was joking that you're going to have some hipster come flying through was on his wayto a pocket watch convention out in fucking, uh, Venice beach or something.All we found was his handlebar mustache.Yeah.He was on his way to this, to meet this food truck.Um, yeah, whatever.
01:05:02I think it's, so there, there is a, so what I, just so I get this clear, can I show yousomething super, please show it to me, but I'm just trying to, cause I'm not, I'm kindof confused.You're saying there is going to be a transportation that like is a drone.So it's like you get into a tube and then it just lifts the tube up and flies you kindof looks like a helicopter.It looks fucking cool as shit.I think it looks fucking cool.
01:05:24Are you showing this?Are you showing to me now?No, I want to show you this, this app here for flight, um, and this is what I'm gettingbetter at here.So this, this here, once I get good at, you know, confident enough in my abilities andI take up a passenger.So it just, you don't have to know.It's not like back in the fucking day where you had to have like a fucking sectional map
01:05:50on your, on your fucking thigh as you're flying around.This thing gives you all the, uh, the airports, all the, um, Santa Barbara, where are we?Where are we?There's Van Nuys.There's Burbank right there.So it's pink.So that's a Charlie.And then you go, what's so great is you can just fucking type in whatever you want to
01:06:13type in.It gives you the eighties.It gives you the, uh, contact tower.It has a map runway eight.This is probably what most time when you land out there and why they slam on the brakesbecause this is so fucking short.That is a small ass landing strip.Yeah.
01:06:29Uh, well, I don't know how you can tell it from the app.I think cause I just told you it was, um, I'm being a cunt right now.Uh, there's, I fly Burbank.There's El Monte.That's one of my favorite ones, but it has all, but it has, see what you see what thisis so boring for people here, but you see right there, that's a Delta.So ground to 2,400s right here.When you're flying along the, the two 15, you know, I'm going to be in the airspace.
01:06:51I got to call them and they'll just give you clearance all the way through.And then once you learn how to read this fucking thing, you can kind of just fly around outhere.Now the rest of the country, they actually have to deal with weather.See, I don't have to deal with it because people like, you just fly across the country.It's like, ah, this is a dry climate that I don't have to ever deal with.Hey, everything's beautiful.Yeah.
01:07:12And then all of a sudden, you know, I can't see anything.There's a brutal fucking call of a guy who like me is not instrument rated, which meansthat the clouds came in underneath me.I don't know how to get back down other than to just shut my eyes and go through the cloudsand hope.Fuck.Yeah.Yeah.
01:07:29So he's up there in the soup is or whatever the fuck they call it and do this guy isfree.I'm going to die.I'm going to die.The guy talked him down and then afterwards he fucking, so he lived.Yeah.But he called the tower.He goes, oh, yeah, thanks.
01:07:42And the guy says, total ice.Yeah.He goes, what happened up there?Yeah.You fucking pussy is basically what you're saying.What happened up there is he got involved in some shit that, that, you know, he wasn'tready for.So that's, that's the one weird thing about flying is you learn by other people dying
01:07:57are doing dumb shit.Cause he died.Somebody showed me one, one time, somebody showed me one, one time with this guy wasdoing a tour in the 44 Robinson 44 and he had three people there when he took off, right?Yeah.Fucking just did this really just.I don't know what he just didn't go like he just ignored everything you're supposedto do.
01:08:19He was loaded up with people.He had, I imagine, you know, a lot heavy with fuel.So what you want to do is use your forward momentum to get going and he just pulled allthis fucking power and his low RPM horn comes on.Yeah.Now the weird thing was the chicken, the passenger sheet was going like right at this, like thesame fucking note.So he didn't hear it at first and all he had to do, he was bank, come out of the bank,
01:08:42lower your collective and it'll go off and then just gradually climb up and he did itfor a second and then he pulled it again and it came on again and then he just starteddescending and your instinct is you want to pull because you want to go up.You actually want to, you actually want to bring your collective down.He kept pulling power and he's fucking running the ground.They all fucking died.Oh, fuck, man.Yeah.
01:09:04So I'll take you up.All right.Girlfriend is pregnant.Hey, Billy.Sad tits.Um, I'm, I'm 28 years old and my 26 year old girlfriend just found out she's pregnant.Now you're saying this dude, like you didn't blow the load in her.She found out she's pregnant, like she got fucking shingles or something.
01:09:23This came as a big shot because I previously had a vasectomy when I was 22.Ah, there's the answer.Jesus Christ at 22, you either had nine kids by then or you never wanted any.He had a vasectomy at 22.He said it never had never wanted kids.After she told me, I went to a urologist who told me I had regained a sperm count, althoughrare.It was not unheard of when I met this girl.
01:09:45She changed my life.I had never trusted or loved any woman the way I do her.She's the light of my life, but weren't planning on this.We both have okay jobs, but living in California is expensive and adding a third mouth to feedand paying for doctor's visits will crush us financially.She doesn't have health insurance.Do you have any advice for me?My fear is losing the chance to have kids with her as this may be a miracle considering
01:10:09my vasectomy and considered you waited a long time to have kids.I want to know if you think this would be a good for someone in my position to go throughthis.Having time to read this poorly and probably not understand my situation.You old gray cunt.The old gray cunt.He ain't what he used to be.Love your shows.
01:10:28I hope to hear more of your ramblings from you.Best of you, the baby, and go fuck yourself and your gay ass patriots.All right.Can I take this?Because I think that he should do it.I think you do.Don't wait on life for your financial situation, man.If you guys will make it work, that's what you will make it work.
01:10:50You'll figure it out.You might not think that you have enough money right now, but life is constantly changingand evolving.And it's just like...Yeah, lay off the micro bruce and have the kid.Yeah, exactly.You'll make it work, just have the kid.You should consider it a miracle, just like you said.
01:11:08I think it's a great thing.I'm actually really happy for you.And I think, put it this way, I wish I didn't wait as long as I did.The other day, I was watching this kid's song.It's just as simple as it's like, snowflake, snowflake, little snowflake, snowflake, snowflake,da-da-da-da-da.And my daughter was trying to sing it, and she was throwing her head back going, snowflake,snowflake.
01:11:35I think it wasn't quite in pitch.Dude, I had to fight off getting emotional.Just watching her do that.I bet it's the most beautiful thing in the world.Ever.Yeah.And there's nothing up until then, anything.I've done Madison Square Garden was not as good as that.
01:11:51And not even remotely, Madison Square Garden was like, wow, that's amazing.But that moment with my daughter was like, this is what life is all about.100%.This is what it's all about.And then another great thing is you become a dad and one of the greatest fucking thingsever.And some sage advice I learned from a good dad is he said how awesome it is becausehe goes, it's not about you anymore.
01:12:12At first I kind of took that as like, you know, because I'm a very like, like, don'ttell me what the fuck to do, idiot sometimes.And then I realized how great that is.Like the other day, I finally had a day off and my wife wanted to go out and go get somebreakfast.She goes, you want to do that?I was like, no, I'm finally home.I want to stay home.
01:12:32So I was just like, all right, fuck it.That's what she wants to do.And we just went out and I said, yeah, it's not about you.They want to go out to breakfast, take them out to fucking breakfast.And I went out to breakfast and I had a great fucking time and I had a great time.And it's weird when you're home, you're a dad or whatever, blah, blah, but when yougo out, you kind of feel more like a dad.I don't know.
01:12:49No, it's like, you guys take them out to dinner or whatever, taking them out of thecar.You're walking.She's holding your hand or you're carrying her.You go in, you get her in the little booster seat.You get her or whatever.Like it's usually like a mac and cheese or like a cut up hot dog or some shit.I assume that she's at that age and you just people are looking at the kid, look how beautiful
01:13:06the kid is.And you're like, oh, I know.It's just like, dude, you're in your element, man.Yeah, no, it's awesome.And what's cool is she's really, really beginning to talk now.So yeah, it's getting the point where I can actually convey to her and she will understandhow much I love her, which is going to be great.Yeah, because obviously you're as much I love you.
01:13:25Do you understand that?And she'll just be looking at you smile or whatever, but I'll actually be able to sayit.She'll be able to understand it.Yeah.I can't wait.Can't wait to fucking play catch with her.I'm going to teach her how to drive my truck three in the tree.
01:13:37You're going to take what, what kid born in 2018 is going to know how to work.Sorry.No, no, I didn't forget about driver's stick drive three on the column.I took it today.I took it over to a Jiffy Lou, which I know a lot of fucking car people are going to giveme shit for that.You went to Jiffy Lou.Well, I would change it.
01:13:53But the way they designed the guy, whoever fucking designed the engine did not talk tothe guy who fucking designed the frame on that truck, because the frame, there's likeliterally a piece that goes from one side to the other right underneath the fucking plugfor the drain plan.So the only, it's just a giant fucking mess.Like when they do it, they have to have this giant thing underneath it and it comes downand it splashes all over that, that piece that goes across.And then they have like this spray thing and then the air thing that they shoot all off.
01:14:20It's like, I'm going to do that in my garage and have a fucking oil spill.I can't do it.I hate it.You got to take it in.I used to love doing it when I was a kid.I used to, that was like my favorite thing because I knew how to do it.I would change the fuel filter.I knew how to do a lube job.
01:14:32I knew how to do the whole fucking, all of that maintenance stuff, but I never had theballs to start taking apart the fucking engine or whatever.But anyways, that's the podcast.We got a cigar to smoke.Hey, your pick for the Super Bowl Patriots Rams, I think it's going to be the Patriots.I really do.I do.And to be honest with you, like I kind of, I love watching greatness and I know people
01:14:58like to hate on the Patriots and I know I tease you sometimes, but it's just like, dude,he's so good.That team is so good, man.And it's like, to be able to say that I watched Michael Jordan win six, like, I know I wasalive during that and nobody else has matched that greatness except for Tom Brady.Well, I think it's going to, I'm going to die a thousand deaths as always.And I really think that, I mean, dude, we're going up against what's looking like the nextBella check.
01:15:23I mean, it's like fucking 33, 34 years old.I mean, it's fucking ridiculous.He was a skin, dude.He was our offensive coordinator.And we gave him up like he, we have fucking one of the goddamn grudans who ain't doingshit.I know Bella check coach the Browns at one point and it happens, dude.It happens.
01:15:41All right.That's the podcast.I'm hoping my Patriots win.I have no idea what's going to happen.The fucking Rams look great.And I think their quarterback, like they just don't make quarterbacks the way they usedto.Like they don't come into the league scared.
01:15:54They just fucking come in like, I whatever.I don't know what it is.Maybe because they video games and shit.They've already seen.I remember that guy used to beat them all the time in eighth grade.Now I'm playing them.Now he's fucking older.I'm not scared of any of these people.
01:16:08All right.I'm rambling.Can I get my final pitch on the podcast?Yes.Guys, everybody, my podcast is called the 500 with Josh Adam Myers joined the record bookclub.We're going through the 500 greatest albums of all time.Bill's done it.
01:16:20Jim Jeffries.We got a just table.Wanda Sykes doing earthwind and fire.It's, it's, it's my fucking favorite thing I've ever done.It's the greatest music of all time.And then hear me in a, in a comic talk shit about it.Not shit.We just go through it.
01:16:35Just join us.I had a great time.Listen to it.Check it out.Josh Adam Myers, the 500.All right.
There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click any sentence in the transcript to leave one.
