Monday Morning Podcast - Monday Morning Podcast 10-2-23

Episode Date: October 2, 2023

Bill rambles about Chinese food, Springsteen, and Egypt. Indochino: Add fresh layers to your fall style with Indochino. Go to www.Indochino.com and use code BURR to get 10% off any purchase of $399 or more. Policy Genius:  Head to policygenius.com or click the link in the description to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save. Stamps.com: Sign up with promo code BURR for a special offer that includes a 4-week trial, plus free postage, and a free digital scale. No long-term commitments or contracts.

Unbelievable! Just unbelievable! What's so unbelievable? These book prices at Book Outlet! Unbelievable! At Book Outlet, you can say goodbye to breaking the bank and hello to unbelievable savings every day. With books at least 50% off list prices and a selection of over 50,000 titles, you'll

never have to pay full price again for brand new books. Check out bookoutlet.ca today and see for yourself. Book outlet, unbelievable savings every day. Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr and it's time for the Monday Morning Podcast for Monday, October. Fucking October, dude, October 2nd, fucking October, dude, October second.

2023, oh my God, I am fucking hurtin'. 38 to three. The Dallas Cowboys just dominating my New England Patriots from the beginning until the end. Not gonna lie to you. I thought we were gonna hang with them for a half and then I just thought they're defense that Micah Parsons and all of them were just gonna, basically be doing in the second half

what they kinda were doing halfway through the first quarter, through the first quarter. So, ah, it just sucks. H8C and Mac Jones struggle, you know? It's one of the fucking worst things ever is to be a highly touted NFL draft pick because you're gonna go to a bad team. And the Patriots were a bad team.

I mean, we're not like horrific, like the fucking Chicago Bears. I can't believe they lost that fucking game. I'm here in Springfield, Massachusetts, and you know, I don't have my, I guess I could have gone on to the fucking YouTube, but I'm not dealing with that shit. So I just watched the games that gave me, because I knew the Pats game was on. That was the one that I wanted to watch. And what did I watch early? The bills, the bills and dolphins. I picked the bills this week. I knew the Pats game was on. That was the one that I wanted to watch. And what I watched early, the bills, the bills and dolphins, I picked the bills this week.

I knew they were gonna win the game and I thought they were gonna cover too, obviously. But I didn't think that they were gonna win that big. So I'm already looking to see what the spread is, dolphins versus giants, if that's a fucking home game. I don't know, it all depends on what number they pick. But, you know, I'm definitely looking at that game. Bill, what do you, some fucking guy that beats the book every week? Shut the fuck up. Hey, what are you talking about? I went two and two the first three weeks

and then I went three and won this week. All right, my one loss is I picked the Pittsburgh Steelers. I thought that I believed in them when they beat the fucking Browns. I guess the Texans have a good fucking defense according to Andrew Thamelis. So fucking good on them, but getting back to Mac Jones. I mean, the fucking guy has had no fucking receivers and no offensive line, the defense is there, but,

you know, and then we got down early, so defense is there, but, you know, and then we got down early, so he feels like he's gotta make something happen. He forces a few throws in there. You know, it's a brutal fucking position. I feel like if you're gonna get drafted as a quarterback, you wanna be in the first round in like the teens. You don't wanna be that one of those,

a first, you know, one of the first 10, I would love to see what the stat is on that. Like a highly touted, you know, top 10 fucking pick in the NFL, how quickly they're out of the NFL and they get caused, they get called a bust. But like, nobody takes into like consideration that they went to the browns or they went to the lions back in the day or they went to the fucking bears. The amount of careers that ended before they even fucking started because they went to these fucking organizations

that haven't been able to get this shit to, I mean, I don't wanna come down on these fucking guys, but the fucking browns have never won a Super Bowl, well, the Ravens did, that version of the Browns did. The fucking, the bears haven't won since they beat my patriots in Super Bowl 20. I guess Mac did throw a fucking pick six to, huh? Watching the low lights.

Oh God, Bill Belichick, fucking Washington's face here. And who else did I pick? The Lions, yeah. All the Joey Harrington's. Who knows what they would have been if they fucking went to a team with an offensive line? Instead of getting the absolute shit kicked out of them for three fucking years running for their life,

like that's your career. That's why that kid at USC is dad's like, look, if he's gonna go number one and he's going, I forget what team he picked, he goes, fuck dad, he'll stay in for another year at USC. Oh, look at USC. Oh, look at this. Wait a minute, the charges. Who won today?

I think Berzy had the charges. Ah, fuck here, come there, raid is. Oh, when he throws a pick. Oh, Jimmy G. Jimmy G, I like the commanders this week too. Sorry, I'm watching the highlights. I did like the, I can't. I like the commanders this week too. Sorry, I'm watching the highlights. I did like the... I can't say I like the commanders.

The commanders scared me this week. Because I thought the Eagles were going to win the fucking game. They did. They didn't win it all the time. Hey, Bill, guess what? We have ESPN too. Why don't you shut the fuck up and get home at the comedy? All right, I'm going to tell you this, people. I'm going to tell you this right now, and I don't have any co-hosts, so there's no one can stop me.

All right? Is there anything funny with that and amped up fucking field go kicker? Fucking jump it around like they just knocked somebody out in the octagon. It's like, dude, you kicked a fucking dead pig through a fucking operator, all right? Get over yourself.

Although it is a pressure gig, right? Hey, who am I? You know what I mean? I'm just fucking Billy Jim class over here. Talking shit about professional athletes. Baker may feel, Baker may feel, all the man does is win. All the man does is win. Goes from one sorry ass fucking franchise to another.

Look at him, buyin' time in the pocket for a tax tag. 26 to 9 the final. That's the one that I don't fucking gamble down there. I stay out of them there, hills. The fucking NFC South, I don't know shit about it. I don't know anything about it. So anyway, I very quietly, sorry, I didn't hit, I meant to hit mute there.

Very quietly, old freckles has been having the best tour of his fucking career. Even as well as Europe went, I think just being over Europe and dealing with a little bit of a language barrier there, even though the crowds were all fantastic, being back here in my native land. It's been like fucking teaball. So the first two nights we were in Portland, Oregon, totally fucking underrated. I got to get a couple of coffee places a shout out here. Make sure I get these right. All right, let me look at

a fucking relax. What are you doing? How are you driving a work? Like you got places to be? Portland, Maine, best coffee. It's funny. This is what's going to come up anyway. And I'm going to act like I'm giving you a fucking heads up here. All right, barred coffee, I went to, and then there's another one down the street that made me a quartado that was fucking fantastic. Where is it?

It was like Buzz Coffee or something like that? Again, with the Buzz Coffee. Buzz Coffee was the business. Bard Coffee, fantastic, and they have a little park there. Next to it, we can sit down, have a little cigar, drink your coffee, be a man of the people You know Be looking at all those main people as they walk by is that a hunter is that a serial killer?

I don't know what it is, but I know what that is over there with the shaved head. That's a fucking women's studies major I'm staying away from that. Can tell you that right now Buzz coffee. I got the cortado down there was fucking fantastic. All right, now here's the bills, fucking Broncos highlights. What the fuck, I mean, the bear's Broncos, what the fuck happened?

A fumble for a touchdown. They're up 31-28. And another fucking pick to ice the goddamn game. Oh Jesus that fucking I have stayed quarterback Justin Turner Justin turn the page He probably wants to go somewhere else in the Bears fans probably want it too when they fucking blame in him and what about your goddamn franchise? Well, I mean you do at some point you do have to blame the quarterback. They're right. I mean Jesus Christ They've lost like fucking what? Like what?

How many games have they lost in a row there? Um, anyway, plowing ahead here. So I had two great shows up in Oregon. It was that crisp, fall football fucking weather. I was outside wearing a windbreaker. I got a lobster roll. I just said I could not have had a windbreaker. I got a lobster roll. I just said I could not have had a better time. So it's been me and Dean Del Rey.

And I'm gonna tell you something. Dean Del Rey has been having the best shows of his fucking career. Absolutely fucking destroying. Destroying. So we did the two shows in Portland. We got the bus on this one. So we're doing a bus run

from Portland, Oregon out to fucking Milwaukee. I get to drive to this beautiful country, you know, and be sad that the fucking show business is out in a goddamn desert that catches on fire every fucking year. I'm back here going, look at all these goddamn trees. You know what I mean? This is fucking gorgeous. Look at the lakes. Look at this lush land. What are we doing? But it is what it is and I got to play the game. So anyway, when we after we finished the Portland Oregon gigs, we drive down to Manchester, New Hampshire, where I used to do gigs all the time. I used to do that high five gig. But on the way, two guys, Segarh Company, had a midget wrestling event, and I was the surprise guest announcer

with the great Tony Vee. And they had this thing in a field on somebody's farm, and under the tent, everyone was smoking cigars. It looked like it was 1923 instead of 2023. And then these midgets came out and just beat the fucking shit out of each other in this smoky environment. It didn't, it did not feel legal.

T-t-t. I mean that in the nicest way and they brought some food trucks up. And one the food trucks believe it or not was from the fucking cow loon in Saugus. Let me I got to tell you guys this because people do not understand there is no fucking Chinese food in this country like the fucking Chinese food that is in New England specifically in the Boston area. Okay? We have most of the shit that you guys have, but we have a couple special teas that aren't around. Chicken fingers! Crab rangoon. What else? There's something else that you can't get. The way they do the fucking egg rolls is different. Oh, fuck, there's one other thing. And we ordered it too.

I had cramp-brang-goom, chicken fingers, and the egg rolls, and then I went out and I watched the midgets kick the shit up with each other. I know there was something else, but they have like despair ribs and all that, but if you come up here, if the cowloon's still open,

open because they keep saying that they're closing, but every time I come back, they're still open. And then my spot in, in denim on Route 1, I heard that place just closed. The Pacific Hut or something like that. I can't remember. But you gotta get the crab brand going because what's his face?

Deans from out west and he had the crab brand going and he's like, dude do what the fuck is this? I'm like, this is New England, fucking Chinese food. And I'm telling you, it comes from mainland China and they're trying to kill us, but it's fucking delicious. All right, I think it's there,

like it's sort of like German warfare, but they respect that that's illegal. So instead, they just try to kill us with like heart attacks, you know? So we go down to do the midget wrestling event. And it's me and Tony V. And let me see if I remember the names here. There was the Bronx thug.

There was the Hollywood savage. There was meatball. And my God, who else? Was that little Captain America dude? And then there was the flying high kid. I forget all of the fucking names, but we were giving him shit and they were yelling back at us. Like, I pissed Meatball off so much he was asking me to get in the fucking ring.

But I also watched enough wrestling, but I also know that he's like, I'm going like, is this guy just doing this to get the crowd going or is he seriously fucking upset with me? But I met him afterwards and I got a great picture with him and he was totally cool. And I was sitting, smoking a fucking cigar with Tony V outside the tent and we're just fucking laughing before we even get out there. with Tony V. Outside the tent, and we're just fucking laughing before we even get out there. And I just look at him, I was like,

dude, this gig is every fucking reason why I got into this business. I did not want to have a real job. I just wanted to have fun hanging out with a bunch of people that wanted to do that. And that's 100% what that event was. The fucking crowd was amazing. First of all, the Midget wrestlers were fucking amazing.

It was an afternoon gig and they went all out like it was a Saturday night. They were beating the shit out of each other. They were suplexing each other. Meatball did the fucking stinky face. I mean, it was just, it was just fucking next level. You know, the referee was fantastic. Just did not have control of it, the entire fucking match. I mean, they were walking up and down the aisles beating the fuck out of each other and he was just walking, you know, counting.

But he wasn't doing, they perfect, perfect wrestling referee. And, you know, people gave me like a thousand fucking cigars, most of which I'll bring down, I put a humor to it down down the comedy store, so I bring it down there for the other comics, also so I don't smoke a thousand cigars. I only spoke 1,500 of them. Oh, I had 2,500. That would have worked better, Bill.

Oh, Jesus. So, there was just some fucking classic lines. I believe their podcast is gonna put some of the audio up. There was funny, I sent the pictures to Nia, right? And she was laughing. She goes, that's hilarious. I go, oh man, it was so much fun. She goes, great.

She goes, that's the last time you're doing that, right? Women just don't get it. They just don't get wrestling. And you know what? In defense of them, I get why I get why they don't get it. But I mean, I walked out of that and all I said was I'll see you next year. Like, I fucking, I'd pay you to do that gig. It was just, you know, I loved, like, oh, I forgot too. Tony ended up being in town. I just randomly called him up. I think he had an audition or something.

I said, Tony, I'm in the North End, my favorite place in Boston, right? I mean, the North End. And he goes, you know, I'm right the North End, my favorite place in Boston, right? I'm in the North End. And he goes, you know, I'm right around the corner, got an audition, whatever. And he fucking came over. We got a cup of coffee. We went over to Polkaris, shout out to Bobby over there. He gave me a pound of fucking ground up Italian blend coffee for free

that I'm going gonna bring home. And he gave us an espresso on the house. So thank you to him. And I just, we just stood out on the sidewalk at like fucking 930 in the morning, smoking a little cigar, drinking these fucking espresso's just fucking talking with the locals talking about the old days and everything.

We just, we could not have had a better time. So anyway, last night, then we went up in Manchester and I brought a drum kit along so I can, you know, what little things I know. Oh, did I mention that to you guys? I got this thing that I've been doing. It's a combination of something that I learned from JP Buve, his BOUVET.

He has an incredible fucking website with just anything that you would ever want to learn or anything that could just set you off. You know, I just love the way he teaches. He breaks it down and then he really encourages you to like make it your own and break off. And it's like Mike Johnston does the same thing on a Sacramento. And I've always loved guys like that.

And Dave Eelich, another guy, same thing. So I just sort of combined what I was telling you guys about that, Bonham lick, that right left kick or right left kick, however you play it, but you play it as 16th notes, quarter on the high hats, you get a three against four thing going, and I go in and out of playing quads and then throwing in a random like four single strokes. And I've just been religiously sitting down for 10 minutes every day doing that.

And I'm starting to hear patterns, pieces of like a solo or whatever. And I just play along to a click and I just try to like actually listen to what I'm playing. You know, and I go in and out of it or whatever, but I always wanted to be like, if I could free myself up on the drums the way I free myself up as a comedian, I'm trying to use some of drums away, I'd free myself up as a comedian. I'm trying to use some of the shit that I did as a comic and some of the shit these drum teachers

have taught me. And I've been having a fucking ball first time. I still look like a complete jerk off when I'm playing. I always feel like I'm fucking slamming and fucking rocking out. And then I will videotape myself. And I look like I'm playing onming and fucking rocking out. And then like I will videotape myself and I look like I'm playing on like a fucking toy drum set. So I need to work on that too. Look at Michael Strayhand soup man, I fucking love that.

Oh Billy's been out here too, hitting the fucking gym, getting the protein with the greens, doing the right thing out here, doing the right fucking thing out here. Yeah, I'm gonna come back, I'm gonna get rid of this last little bit. The writer's strike has been solved, has been resolved, so proud of the writer, the WGA union,

everybody's stuck to their guns, and I think that we really, this was a major fucking victory. And I'm so happy. I have so many of my friends or writers. I'm so happy that they got a great deal. I'm not sure if I'm able to, I have a project coming out. I just don't know when I can promote it.

Because I think I have to wait till the sag thing is resolved. So I will do that, whatever they tell me to do I will do. So anyway. And with that, and with that, how much time have I done here? 20 minutes, I got my show tonight in Springfield, which I'm looking forward to. I'll fuck myself, I'm just gonna die here. I might have been plugging it in all fucking day.

I will tell you something, a New England right of passage that I finally understand is a Dunkin' Donuts ice coffee. Everything was closed out here because it was Sunday, downtown Springfield, Massachusetts, beautiful Springfield, Massachusetts. Love the downtown area, walking around, they got the Poup-P hall of fame right around the corner.

And none of the coffee joints were open, so I said, fuck it. I'll go to the Dunkin' Donuts at the gas station. I got a fucking ice coffee. Fucking two creams, no sugar. No sugar, I don't fuck with sugar anymore because I can't handle it. You know, like these fucking cigars I can't quit, you know? I gotta cut those out at some point.

How you gonna do that Bill when you go to cigar smoking events with midget speed and the shit out of each other? You know what, that's a fair question. That's a fair question, I don't have an answer for it. Maybe I'm just not ready to quit yet. So, I got this fucking iced coffee, right? True cream, snow sugar. I got a medium. So it's probably like 16 ounces or something.

It's probably even more than that. It's probably like 20 ounces of this fucking iced coffee. It was fucking delicious, all right? And it starts kicking in, and then I go into the gym today with my fucking soccer mom day where I just get on the elliptical. I get my fucking steps in and do it.

I got 20 minutes in and my fucking started getting the jitteries. And I was just like, this doesn't feel healthy. Hehehehe. Hehehehe. And if I was a woman, I would have listened to my body It doesn't feel healthy. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I just been doing right, dude, I got back into the French. I'm back on the Pimsler. The further say I've got with it, was 10 lessons in level five.

So I went back to level one, I mean, I went back to the first one on level five. And I've done lesson one and lesson two, and I'm just gonna do a lesson every single day. I've been listening to, I got this app where I can listen to French radio now, and I actually start, I'm starting to know what the fuck they're talking about, which is exciting,

and I'm just gonna plow ahead with that shit. Also, before I do the reads here, I'm fucking supposed to go right now. All right, you know what, I'm supposed to go right now. All right, you know what, I'm gonna pick this up after my show. It won't be a big deal, it's too quick a little edit. You won't even feel the difference. All right. All right, I am back.

I am back. It's now magically Monday morning. I did my show last night. Crowd was unbelievable. It's such a great time. I was a little nervous because I just done the Springfield in August. So I was kind of saying a club soda, Kedi, Os Lake.

You know, I mean, how many people do you think the same? He's, youedi, I was like, you know, how many people do you think the same? He's like, you know, I don't know. Maybe like 10% or something like that. So, just in what people see me doing the exact same shit. So I came out and I was riffing a lot. And also I've written or sort of babbled a lot of shit since then.

So I think it was enough of a different show. I don't know, I always, it's such a weird thing. If you do like a Friday and Saturday night same city, you don't have to worry about the same person coming back. But this was August and then October. Anyway, I just want to give a shout out to Tim Wakefield, Red Sox legend, unfortunately, passed away. Only 57 years old, far, far, far too soon.

Absolute 100% legend. I think it was reading. He played 17 years, 17 seasons with the Red Sox, 19 seasons all together. And the amount of big games that that guy came in and just saved our ass because he threw the knuckleball. It could just eat up innings. The amount of games that he won for us. It's just, I don't know. He was part of that 2014, that finally got us to championship and everything.

And I actually was lucky enough to meet him one time. Of course, it was a charity event. And he was really big on doing stuff like that. It was him and Jason Veritech had come down to the comedy connection in Fanon Wall. And I got to thank both of them for 2004, which was a huge thrill. And I was really taken aback at how down to Earth and nice he was. Saying that with Jason Veritech, they were both like, you know, super nice. And I don't know, I can't,

I didn't even know the guy was sick. But that is just far, far, far too young. And I don't know, listening to this stuff that Jason Veritek was saying, Kevin Euclis, you can, I don't know, you can just tell that that little glimpse that I saw of him was not just Tim on his best behavior, it's just kind of how he was. So I don't know, tough one, definitely a tough one.

So Rest in Peace Tim Wakefield. And with that, where do you go from there? I'm not gonna try to do comedy, so I'll do the subtle comedy of me reading out loud, doing advertising, really. Okay, here we go. Sorry, just woke up here.

Endochino. You like that? I added a little bit of white soul on that. I always hated when they said that blue-eyed soul. I was supposed to believe the white dude sounded like a black dude. It's like he didn't, you know. Never understood that. I like Michael McDonald's, but I never thought like, God damn, that sounds like a black guy. He doesn't. He doesn't. He sounds like a dog that wants to go outside. He's like, he's like,

he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's just, it falls into that Star Wars thing. I trash Star Wars just because people like it. I do the same thing with Bruce Springsteen. I have a friend who I love Bruce Springsteen. And I always say, yeah, I saw him, you know, he's pretty good. What do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean,

what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you mean, what do you know, I, he's kind of like New Jersey's meatloaf, right? Now, I obviously don't think that on any level. And I love little Stevens underground garage. I love Max Weinberg and I love the bunch of shit that I love. But I love more meeting somebody that loves Bruce Springsteen

and then just fucking with them. Because people that love Bruce Springsteen, they are so deep in that love that they're just so easy to get. And all you have to do is just compare Bruce Springsteen to some, I don't know, Bob Seagars and other one. Yeah, he's kind of new Jersey's Bob Seagars, right? And they get all fucking mad. I like Bob Seagars, but like this is just, like, how dare you put Bruce Springsteen on

Bob Seagal's level. I'm like, fuck, you talking about it, just fucking. Bob Seagal and the silver bullet band that live album he put out, I'd put that up against anything that Bruce Springsteen ever did. Oh my God. They jump right on the hook. It's fantastic.

In fact, one of the greatest things that I love about Bruce Springsteen is how much his fans love him, because this is so easy. I remember one night I was hanging out with Forrest Shaw, and there was a Bruce Springsteen fan there, and we just started fucking with him. And Forrest Shaw said, he said, that Bruce Springsteen was the Jimmy Buffett of New Jersey.

No disrespect, I don't even just die to whatever, but this person, like, they were so appalled, like they weren't even mad, they just couldn't believe it. And that was the one that broke me, like I couldn't keep a straight face. And they figured out we're just, we're just fucking with it. We like, why do you not like Bruce Springsteed? We're just kidding, we just, you know,

it's just when you say he came to Tampa, did nine shows. I was at all nine of them. It's like, okay, we got it. We got a live one. Yeah, you know, I get to be honest with you, Spent no bad ballet, you know? Not that one with the second album. Have you listened to the second album?

You just do shit like that. I mean, that was, that was right up there with born in the USA. LAUGHTER Anyway, people can do that shit with me. Bartnik does it with me. I finally figured out that he was doing it, so the game was over, he would keep bringing up all Samuelson.

He would do that. What's another thing used to get me going? Oh, the Flategate. That still gets me going. People do it to me too. Oh, you know the fucking... The all Samuelson's in our ring of honor. I want the fuck I would just start losing my shit. Anyway, enough with fucking with people. Do you guys do that to anybody in your life? I'm sure you guys have something, some band

that somebody loves. All right. I remember when Tommy met this woman that had a... She had the band's tattoo right on her fucking forearm and I was just like, oh, that's all the information I need. Let the games begin. Oh, by the way, did I mention that... And I'm going to be in Reno at the Reno Event Center on October 28th with a man that should be getting the key to the city to Reno. Mr. Joe Bartnik, he actually posted a picture of him in Paul Verzi went to the Chargers

Raiders game yesterday and two of my favorite people in the fucking world, out of football game, looking like they were having the time of their life. All right, Indochino. You know, you can elevate your closet with Indochino for custom made to measure pieces at an off the rack price. This season, Indochino has new colors, fabrics, and styles to choose from, from classic suits for special occasions, to head turning outerwear for your sidewalk stride. Oh shit, you can be killing them

with your fucking Johnny Travolta. Some of these suits come with a bucket of paint, you can walk down the street, but I poop, boo, boo, poop, poop, poop, poop, well you can't tell by the way I fucking walk I got a can of paint no time to solve. Fucking bitch is not using the condom because it's 78 and I don't care. Doing coke, done, I'm sorry. With new colors, fabrics and outerwear styles it's easy to create your fall look. Their unique process allows you to choose

the exact customizations. Customizations, as I'm saying that right. You want from buttons, oh, bully buttons, and vents to pockets and lapels. You see how you want it, and that's how they build it. I would love to see that they submit your measurements online or book a showroom appointment to your fucking diva to work with an Indochino expert style guide in person. Create a suit that fits you and your style perfectly with endless customizations, options so you get exactly, you get the exact look you want.

Man, you know what, I was going to get my ace-rusting fucking suit. I think my daughter wants me to go as Luigi though, on one of those fucking Mario people. I said that when I was Mario people, they should kick them out of the fucking country. Quality European wools linens and cotton in a wide range of colors and patterns, design a look personalized to your style and taste without the luxury price tag. Add fresh layers to your fall style with Indochino. Go to Indochino.com and use the code bird to get 10% off any purchase the 399, I'm, that's 10% off at INDOCHINO.com promo code bird. That is a good one for you.

The other night, one of my friends, she's a fucking absolutely huge, huge, huge, Bruce Springsteen fan. So she's on the phone talking about how we had to cancel this tour and she was all bummed out, right? And she absolutely loves to go. But she knows my game that anytime I make fun of them, she just laughs because she knows I'm just

fucking with it, right? And I actually saw Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band at the most sterile fucking place you could ever go the Honda Center in Anaheim, California and the guy absolutely fucking destroyed. I also worked with him one time on a benefit where he came out saying a couple of songs that auctioned off for guitar after Tony Bennett,

the late great Tony Bennett went on. Sick of show I've ever been on, and he absolutely fucking murdered. So I am just fucking around. But most people that love Bruce Springsteen don't listen to this podcast, so I will continue. Cause there's too much. So anyway, my friend is sitting there going,

oh, you know, he canceled this show and blah, blah, blah, blah. And then she goes, push, he got COVID too. And I went, God damn, she goes, what? I go, I thought you liked the guy. Oh, you really got issues with COVID, huh? She goes, no, I go, you just, you go, you know, you're talking all nice about it and then you go, push, he got COVID too.

She goes, I didn't say push, he got COVID. I said then you go pussy got COVID too. She goes, I didn't say pussy got COVID. I said plus he got COVID too. I thought she would speak it all nice with them and then she just didn't respect him. Pussy got COVID too. Anyway, oh, it's policy genius everybody. If you've got loved ones who depend on you, why leave anything up to chance in a worst-case scenario? Life insurance gives you a safety net that can cover expenses, say they don't have to worry about money while getting back on their feet. After they stick you in the ground, they can go right to fucking target. Luckily, policy genius makes finding the right policy simple and

their team of licensed experts are on hand to help talk you through it. With policy genius, you can find life insurance policies that stat at just $292 per year for $1 million of coverage. Some options offer same-day approval and avoid unnecessary medical exams. Policy Genius knows how valuable your time is. Their technology makes it easy to compare life insurance quotes from America's top insurers in just a few clicks to find your lowest price. Your loved ones deserve a financial safety net. Yeah, man, you can't kick the bucket, then they got no money.

You deserve a smart way to find and buy it. Head to policygenius.com or click the link in the description to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save. That's policygeneneers.com. Stamps.com, oh, shit, all right. Almost went straight into the other one. Stamps.com, everybody, you know, the holiday rush means more mailing shipping for your business, but it doesn't have to mean more stress. That's right. Stamps.com has been helping businesses like yours save time and money for 25 years. It can help you get ready for the holiday ramp up.

All you need is Stamps.com's premium rates for all your postage needs. With Stamps.com all you need is a computer and printer. They even send you a free scale. Jesus, drug dealers are loving this. So you'll have everything you need to get started. Now, taking care of orders on the go is even easier with stamps.com mobile app. If you need a package, pick up, you can easily schedule it through

your stamps.com dashboard. And if you sell products online, stams.com is seemingly seamless. Connects with every major marketplace and shopping cart. Get huge carrier discounts up to 84% off United States Postal Service and UPS rates to help your bottom line. Get access to the United States Postal Service and UPS services you need right from your computer anytime, day or night. No lines are traffic, no waiting. I literally just said that. Get your business ready for the holiday rush.

Get started with stamps.com today. Use the problem called Burr BURR for a special offer that includes a four week trial plus free postage and free digital scale, no long-term commitments or contracts, just go to stamps.com, click the microphone on the top of the homepage and enter the code. All right, and with that, let's get your questions for the week. Everybody, shall we? Why should it just be me running my app? When I can run my app reading shit that you said, oh New York City flooding! A Billy Flood pants! I'm sure you saw the flooding in New York City this weekend.

I didn't. I don't watch the news. I also missed that smash and grab that those fucking kids did at an Apple store in some idiot film the whole thing. I mean, all of them. All of them just lost the right to vote for the rest of their lives. For a fucking iPad that was going to be what? I don't know you

seeing this more and more? I'll tell you this smashing grab is out of control and you know what they're going to do? They're're gonna blame the people that are doing it rather than the bankers at the top, you know, that are crushing us, you know? But it helped finance our foreign policy that now we are a completely bankrupt and our money doesn't mean anything. So the level of inflation is fucking insane. I think that's more the reason why you're seeing this smashing grab,

rather than that there's a bunch of parents that didn't raise their kids right. I would say, anyway, I didn't see the flood, I didn't see the flooding. The amount of idiots screaming climate crisis about poor city infrastructure is infuriating. New York City has long been overdue for major infrastructure changes, but never seems to have the money. You know, as much as a lot of people didn't like Giuliani, you know, he did a great job with infrastructure as far as like, you know, the cabs and the subways and all of that. And to watch it slowly going back to the fucking 70s, I just think it's the ebb and flow of New York City. As person says, our cities are falling apart, bridges, sewage, and drainage, etc. The amount of rainfall we got this weekend was poultry and nothing out of the ordinary.

It's a totally separate issue. I miss living in a small town where people who run the town actually give a partial shit about the well-being of things. Well you mean like those fucking evil redheads down there in South Carolina, putting my people back a fucking hundred years? No I like the small town vibe too. I have to be honest with you.

That's why my back porch is my favorite thing because I'm just looking out at trees. And I do know what you make. Well, in defense of the people running the city, what is it, seven, eight million people there? Everybody taking dumps. The fact that it even works is fucking amazing. Hopefully they turn it around

because as much as I make fun of the sports teams, I love New York City, I love America, and I don't wanna see people get hurt, you know, with bridges collapsed. And look at me, now I'm fucking on your bank. When the fucking bridges are gonna collapse, people are gonna end up in the water. Well, hopefully they redo it. I mean, aren't those subway tunnels like a hundred years old?

The sewage areas are like that too. If you got a poultry amount of rain and you still had flooding, I would think that the very least they need to clean out those fucking sewage drains. Adopt a sewage drains. Adopt a sewage drain in New York City. I feel like I have to sneeze. Ah, who I did. Look at that dude, I called it. Oh, this is what I get for just rolling on a bed

and doing a friggin' podcast here. All right. Egypt everybody. Egypt. Hey, Billy, talk a lot. Hey. All right, I know, you're right. Love hearing you talk about Egypt,

there are a lot of mysteries about life in Egypt before the civilization fell to times in war. The entire area was lush and full of vegetation. No one really knows what use the pyramids had. Some speculate there was a dome on top of the pyramids of Geiza, I hope I said that right, that directed the sun's energy through the interior that supplied them with the form

of energy. In the late 1800s, slash early 1900s, British Egyptianologists, Egyptologists made their minds up about a lot of the history of the area, and much of it is now being proven wrong through carbon testing. Yeah, why the fuck are British people summing up what you guys did? Or what Egyptians did? It's so fucking stupid. However, most of them refused to acknowledge this because it would render their books and careers obsolete. Also, to put it in perspective, the time between the construction of the great pyramids and the time of Cleopatra and the time between Cleopatra and today is the same amount of time. By the time she ruled, most of her own country's history was already

ancient history to her. Well, all I know is that they were crushing it over there. I don't think they ever got that due. Same thing with like India, you know. I'm sure they get that due in their own books. They certainly don't over here. It's such a stupid fucking thing. Like, hell, racism and culture shit. It's just so fucking, just give people their fucking do.

All right, if they crushed it, give it up. Me TV. Oh, hey Billy Bedrock. I just switched cable providers and finally have this Me TV channel. You've been raving about, oh yeah, heroes and icons. There's some great ones out there. I gotta say it's pretty incredible. I've been raving about oh yeah heroes and icons and some great ones out there I gotta say it's pretty incredible I've been watching Colombo regularly oh that's my favorite you know I just just just one more question if just one more question I just just one you know what this this just one more thing that's been bothering me I used to watch that show with my mother-in-law, man, and we would just be fucking crack it up. When he would fucking start walking away and then he would come back.

You know what? You know what? There was, there was this one thing. This one thing that, I mean, forgive me, I'm just having a little problem with. You know, you mentioned that you were in the car, right? So you're riding in the car, passenger seat, right? And we would just start cracking up because you knew that, oh, he's, he's, he's gonna get this guy. All right, the person said, I had no idea they were basically two hour movies. I can see why your drinking got out of control. Oh yeah, I used to watch 77 Sunset Strip. And then I would watch Peter Gunn, Colombo. This is other channel I've been watching CoJack. Hawaii 5.0

Walker Texas Ranger, I mean they're just amazing. Anyway, now watching these shows just makes me want to drink whiskey and eat red meat. Yeah, that's all they're doing. Yeah, you got a pretty active elbow for two in the afternoon. My favorite thing is not seeing any cell phones or having some message shoved down my throat. Are you still able to watch these shows or would that push you back on the sauce? No, I'm still able to watch the shows. I would say one of the hardest shows to not drink along with the cast would be Peaky Blinders.

Peaky but I'll roll it. No, no, no know about no role break. That fucking show, that show I used to get pretty fucking hammered watching. And I remember my lovely wife was pregnant with our beautiful daughter. And when I would come back from the store together, whatever she needed, whatever she was craving, that is such a fun time for a guy, not for a woman. You know,

it's just that you get to take care of your wife. I used to love doing that going to the store, getting her whatever she wanted, helping her out, rubbing her feet, poor thing. But when she went to sleep, oh, Billy hit the fucking, hit the home by. Oh my God, yes I did. I used to have a fucking great time. And I found this guy in El Segundo who made these glasses. They were genius. Basically what it was was the it was I guess you'd call it a high ball glass. And you know those giant square ice cubes that you put in there? That was part of the glass. It was a big square ice cube, but it was all made out of glass. And just stay with me on this, right? So then you took the glass and you put it in the freezer.

Okay? So when you took it out, then you poured expensive liquor over it, you know, there was that thing, you know, if you liked your liquor a little bit chilled, but you had something really expensive, the fact that you even had one ice cube in there was almost sacrilegious that you were watering down the taste of the booze. So that's kind of also why you went with the big one, because I felt like the big one melted less, so to overpower, brought the liquid closer to its temperature. So this guy solved that problem by having the liquid, not only the side of the glass inside the glass,

was the glass ice cube. So the entire thing was being cooled on both sides without being watered down. So it was the best of both worlds where the liquor was neat and you could taste the liquor, but it was cold like there was an ice cube in it. It was fucking genius, but I will say the glasses weighed like five pounds. So, and I have not used or seen those glasses since fucking 2018. I was a glasses guy for a while. You know, during the pandemic, for whatever dumb reason I made the decision that I was going to be able to make, like, the perfect, like, Oreo cookie or chocolate malt. I ordered this fucking malt

and I just started making these things. And I put them in like fucking 20 pounds during the fucking pandemic. I'm finally getting it off though. But I had like, I even went out and I bought the Sunday glasses, you know, like you wear friendly's or briggums, the ice cream places where I was Johnny Rockets

for you people out on the West Coast, Bob's big boy. I went to them all, all of those fucking chains. And yeah, that was my shit for a while. I used to, I used to, you know, I got into all of that. That was something else. Every once in a while, I'll go in that cupboard. And I'll open it up like on Thanksgiving or something, get the special plates of some shit.

And I see all those glasses from all the different times. All my beer glasses. I don't have a lot of them, but I had a few. Like, when I did Antwerp in Belgium, I went there and every beer had their own glass, their own special glass, and it just fucking blew my mind. And I kind of did that thing, you know, you come back from a vacation, be like, I need to have that in my house, rather than just enjoying that because that what happens, you buy the stupid shit, right? You buy the dumb shit and then you have no fucking use

for it, right? It's just you're into it for a little bit. And then you're like, wait a minute, I can't fucking drink booze every night or I can't be eaten if I have in Sundays every night. I tell you what, I can go have though. And when I'm gonna go have is my fucking Dunkies

Ice coffee two creams no sugar. I'm gonna go mozy and get one of those fuckers right now Old Billy went three and one fucking pads came I Kind of saw that one coming really hard to see Bella check Dealing with this crap. He put Zappy in at the end of the game, which I kind of felt like if they didn't put him in at the end of this game, he's going to come in next week. And he was running for his life, too.

So I feel like we've know, we got to get that Boutet kid healthy and we need our offensive line to do a better job than what they've been doing because as much as people are going to come down on Mac Jones, I mean, what the fuck is he supposed to do running for his life? That's it. I also, you know, I don't know. I like offensive linemen. I like talking to them.

I met a few. They're always like talking about how dumb defensive linemen are. Like, that's their whole thing. Like, we're actually intelligent. Defensive people are stupid. They're just like, uh, where's ball, go get it. And then they talk about how they have all these complex blocking schemes. It's just my favorite thing in the world. And then talking to defensive tackles, and all they do is talk about how filthy

and what fucking cheaters and the shit that people in the offensive line do. Like, I don't understand why the NFL Network has never had those two- the Hatfields and McCoy's of professional football, the down line, and just sitting there telling stories about what the fuck they did to each other, and who was the dirtiest, who was the hardest to block. I mean, I don't know. I'm a nerd. I would watch that shit. All right. That's the podcast, everybody. Thank

you for listening. I'm going to go get myself a coffee and next, next stop on this tour. We're going to be in Syracuse, New York. All right. The orange men. I'll see you up there. All right. I'll check it on you in a couple of days. Global Business. Apply now at Humber.ca slash business.