Monday Morning Podcast - Monday Morning Podcast 3-30-20

Episode Date: March 30, 2020

Bill rambles about safe walks, oil, and forced quarantine by your family.

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Byrne. It's time for the Monday Morning Podcast for Monday, March 30th, 2020. What's going on? How are you? How's it going? How are you doing? How are you hanging in there? I apologize that the podcast is a little late. No, I don't. The fuck are you going? Huh? What do you have to do? Are you going to be one of these stupid cunts that's still going out and about all the fucking time with three of your goddamn friends? Going on a hike with three of your friends talking about how Trump is mishandling this situation. Listen, I understand if you got to run a couple of errands, but these fucking people, I, you know, you know, I'm going for walks. I walk around the block. I walked around the fucking, no,

I was in the car, right? Yeah, I was in the car, right? Driving. I'm safe, safe to drive, but even then I barely do that. I haven't gotten gas and three fucking weights, right? I've been very, I've, you know, I've been very good about this, right? So I'm fucking serpentining this little road and I come in this four people just hanging out, working out right next to each other outside because they can't go to the gym. And I just want to be like, please tell me you all live together and you're all fucking each other. I don't understand. I just don't understand why people are continuing. There's a park, you know, in my neighborhood and you just, I don't know. The few times I drive down the street, my thing is I try to go out like once every

three days, you know, we just, we go for a little family drive, right? We go on a family drive, zoom, zoom, zoom, come back like a half hour later, get a little fresh air, breathe a little different air. Is that bad? I don't know. So anyway, we go by these fucking parks and you just see all of these people out and they're sort of six feet apart, but not really, I'm telling you, man, I'm telling you, this is like, this is why you can't get mad at Trump on this shit. You can only get, you can't just sit there and blame this guy and now look at all these fucking mouth-breathing morons. I don't know. I don't understand it. I guess they want it to keep going. Maybe what they could do is they could just start, do you just, the government just shoots a pack of hikers

in each city. So these fucking assholes finally get the message because the thing is, is if you don't, if you don't have symptoms at this point, I think people think that I'm good and then they go out and then they expose themselves to somebody else that's only 11 days in. I don't know. I haven't been watching the news, but I am fucking, I don't know, as little faith as I have in humanity, I am still amazed that people, the level of selfishness of people, you know, but I have noticed behaviors have changed because I had to go, you know, I got to get some food. I got to go out and get food. So I went and everybody had fucking masks on and gloves on in this place. Last week, nobody did. So I think people are basically getting it and we were all standing six feet apart and they

had a little thing on the floor. Stand here and we made sure we stayed away from each other and, you know, and then even then, you know, I took stuff out of the bag and then you got to wash your fucking head, throw the shit out, wash your fucking hands, doing everything I can't, all right, but a freckles, old freckles here is fucking a freckles, old freckles is asymptomatic so far. So far, I am fine. I get a lot of emails from people that are saying that they're losing their minds, which is so fucking funny to me. That's just like, as I understand it, the boredom, whatever, you know what it is, is you got a lot of your freedom taken away, you know, all your virtual reality shit, your fucking selfies and all that type of stuff and to like live, you know,

the way they did in the 1920s with not as much, I guess, well, you still have as much stimuli at home, but you can't go out. You just need a little bit of perspective to keep yourself saying, because I've gone a little stir crazy. I go for my little hike. I try to do it at night, you know, because there's not a lot of people around, you know, so I just walk through my neighborhood, I put on the headphones, I got this fucking AC DC playlist that I've been playing along to playing drums to, by the way, by the way, the most underrated fucking AC DC album, I think, is for those about to rock came out a year after back in black, no way, no matter what they did, people would have bitched because back in black

was just such a huge fucking album. And Phil Rudd kind of goes back to a busier drum style that he said he had on some of the earlier, like if you listen to the original recording of problems, problem child is based from his way busier, and then you listen to him on, if you want blood, you got it playing problem child live, and he's doing the meat potatoes based from on one and three. We're on the album, he was playing it on one and, and I think the end of two and then three. Something like that, whatever, you guys don't fucking play drums, you don't give a shit. But anyway, so here's my, here's my, my playlist, and the playlist is called Bill Rudd, because I love a pun. Is that a pun? I don't even know. All right, COD.

All right, one of the great fucking drum tracks he's had. And then off of that's all that's off of for those about to rock, then I listened also often for those about to rock, I put the finger on you. That's another great one, then dirty deeds done dirt cheap off of the dirty deeds album, then what's next to the moon off power age, then get it hot off highway to hell, girls got rhythm off highway to hell, and if you want blood, you got it highway to hell. So that's my like fucking, after I do a little warm up or whatever, I do that, then I got my bass drum workout songs. Gee, Bill, what are those mass appeal gang star want to be starting something Michael Jackson, um, which has this killer fucking opening with the snare starts on the end of three,

I believe this is so much time I have and for and and then you hit one on the hi hat, and you're playing 16th notes up to the two, one E end of two, but the bass drum comes in on E and of one, it's so fucking weird, um, trying to play that on time. And that's just a kid, that's a killer bass drum workout. Then I played Michael Jackson jam, which if you really listen, there's like two different bass drums going on there. There's the one that's way up front in the mix. And then the one that that's kind of, it's almost like ghost note, but on the bass drum, the wanton song led Zeppelin in my time of dying led Zeppelin. And then my holy grail good times, bad times, which I can still only get two in a row, but I've just really been working on that

song this entire time. I'm up to, uh, I played it at what 75 or 77 BPMs, but I can kind of do that, that, um, that 16th, no triplet lick that he does. I can do it up to like 80, sometimes 85 BPMs, but like, I just don't have control of it. Um, which, and what's fucking hilarious is I'm out this drum talk, doesn't bore all of you guys. But what I'm finding is, just like in stand up or in anything else, trying to hit a baseball and everything, the more relaxed you are, the more power you have, the easier it is to play. And the more control you have, which is crazy because it's, it's built up for 32 years. I just realized today I've been trying this song with something I've been chasing since I first started

playing drums 32 years ago. John Bonham only lived 32 years. He got his first real drum kit at 15 and then was in the studio and recorded good times, bad times when he was 19, barely 19. So he got, you know, I read this doing his son said this, Jason was talking about how he got that good in four years. And that was a whole new perspective that just took my admiration for that guy to a whole other level. Um, so anyway, so I'm really finding that if I tense up like, Oh, here it comes, here it comes. I crap out on the third one. But if I just chill and try to get that first one, I kind of settle into the muscle memory of it. And it's been going really well. So, uh, I'm going to get that man. I think by the end of April or whatever, who gives a fuck. It's

taking me 32 years. If I get it by 32 years plus May, am I going to give a fuck? Um, but I'm having a, uh, just a great, great fucking time. And anybody who wants to just 100% improve on what it is they're doing on a drum kit, I can't recommend Dave Elitch's online lessons, uh, enough, uh, just everything from so much shit, sitting up straight, breathing, not holding tension in your face, all of this shit that if you're a self taught person, you know, when I was growing up, there was all this big shit about not taking lessons, man, they're going to kill your vibe, man. You're going to be in your head. You're going to play like a scientist, man. And what I can tell you is it really, it's all how you apply it.

All right. And the way Dave teaches is he's like, Hey, just give me five minutes a day with this thing, five minutes a day. And then just go back to playing how you always fucking play. You just do it five minutes every day. Think about it a little bit when you're playing and it'll gradually work its way in naturally into your playing. And that's, that's the way I think that's like the best way to do it. So then, you know, you're hyper focused for these five minutes, but then when you go to play, you don't have to feel like, Oh God, I took 15 fucking steps back. You can still sit down and wail and do all the shit wrong, at least if you're me. But yeah, it was really an interesting thing. And it's kind of the same way what I can stand up

that I found that the more I gave a shit about a gig, I mean, that's what really, that's really all pressure is, is you all of a sudden caring too much, I think, like, this is it. Okay, I'm doing this. Let's, you know, blah, blah, blah, blah. The thing is, is you have to trick yourself into not giving a fuck the more you care in a good way. It's a, it's a very weird, weird thing. And some people can do that naturally or more naturally than others, but it's definitely a skill that can be learned how to trick yourself into acting like you're just fucking doing a late night spot at a comedy club when you're actually going on to do stand up on television or you're shooting a special, just things that you can do. You know,

you almost have to be like, if you tape on a special, you got to be like, you know, fuck this special. Oh, a fucking stand up. But is it special? Everybody has a special. It's not special. Who gives a fuck? Fuck these cameras. Fuck it. Fuck everything. I'm going out here. I'm having a good time and I'm fucking around because I kind of realized after a while of doing this, that I fuck up jokes every night, but I don't really notice or give a shit. And sometimes my fuck up turns into like an appendix to the bit or something extra. I don't know what. And the only time I noticed that from fucking up bits early on was if I was doing like a special or I was, I was taping a TV set or something like that. Oh, fuck. I missed that tag. And all of America gives a shit. They

don't. They don't. So I kind of learned how to do that. So I'm finally like applying this to, um, to play in drums and, uh, my warm up song. I'll give you who gives a fuck about it. And what else am I gonna, there's nothing going on in the fucking news other than people just staring, watching the news, waiting for something good to happen. God knows they're not going to fucking tell you anything good. So my warm up song, after I do a little fucking around on the kit, I played it at the weekend, Starboy. Um, that's a fun one. It's also a fun one just to try different fills and shit like that and make up shit. Um, you guys, let's do his new album yet. No, this is, this is my latest shit that I've downloaded because of Andrew Thamelis. I downloaded

Night Moves. Can you really find me loving that album? Uh, I was already a fan of the weekend. So I, I downloaded after hours loving that album. Uh, Lamma God has a new one with the last one that Chris Adler is going to play on. So I downloaded that loving that, uh, spilt milk, spilt milk, milk, MELK milk bill spilt milk, uh, by jellyfish. Um, I downloaded that because of Dave Elich. And, uh, then there's one, I think I accidentally, I think I downloaded the wrong song. I downloaded an Eddie Money song called There Will Never Be Another You. I'm like, what the fuck did I download that for? I was trying to think, is there a drum fill in here or something? I don't know what it

is, but I've been playing along to it. I like it. Uh, and then Phil Rudd had a solo album that I didn't even know about called Head Job. And I fucking love that album. Butthole Surfers, Independent Worm Saloon, which I've downloaded like 50 times. Every time my phone shits the bed, I always lose that one for some reason. I drive, I bought a couple of songs by the drive by truckers, uh, courtesy of Steve Gorman. Uh, used to be a cop and never going to change in goddamn lonely love. That's my dipping my toe into those guys. That's what I've been doing. Um, let me know what you guys are listening to. I got all kinds of time. I know Donald Glover's new album came out today because my lovely wife was playing it on the home speakers.

I really liked what I heard on that. The fucking talented is that guy. So that's what the fuck I'm listening to. Um, let me know what you guys are listening to as we sit here and we try to make it through the pandemic. I mean, honestly, people, uh, like there's always people that have it worse than you. It's a great mindset to try and stay in. Like when I get, you know, when I get like cabin fever, I'll just look up like worse ways to die. And I saw there was this one, this queen, one of this guy executed and was going to have him literally sought in half from the head down, and they started on his head. And then she goes, wait a minute, wait a minute. He's going to die too quickly. And they turned him upside down and started with his undercarriage. Okay. Now,

you tell me how bad is how much cabin fever do you have? You want to go outside and have that happen to you? Anybody see that baboon that ate that little fucking deer alive? I couldn't watch it. Couldn't fucking watch it. See, so there's all of those things. All of those things. You could actually have the fucking coronavirus and be going to the hospital and they don't have a ventilator. That could happen. You could have that excitement. So you wouldn't be going bored out of your mind as you take a fucking selfie of how bored and crazy you're going. Um, you know, I mean, all of these fucking parents talking about how they're going nuts at home with their kids. It's just like, how fucking nuts do you think they were going in the 1800s?

You know, when you get legit die of some shit, every fucking 10 minutes in a grizzly bear could just poke his head and be like, Oh, there's breakfast. Like he's at the fucking McDonald's drive-thru. Take a couple of your kids like a fucking happy meal. Let's get some perspective people. Come on, man. You're better than this. I'm having a great time hanging with my, uh, my daughter, man. Dude, she is crushing it. Um, with the, uh, the, uh, what do you call it? The t-ball. She's been crushing the t-ball. She's a lefty. I can't believe it. I'm so psyched. She started to throw the ball left hand, and then she gradually switched over to right and I'm trying so hard not to kind of make her throw with their left hand too. You know, I might,

I want to just get, you know, she's a left-handed here. So I'm, I'm happy about that. I could deal with that shit, but you know, I'm definitely who's that kid, that poor kid who's, who's dad, just from day one decided he was going to be a professional quarterback. He played for USC and he played for the red Todd Manderich. And I remember reading how like when he was in the crib, his dad used to, you know, when babies come out of the womb, they're like, like beyond flexible. You know what I mean? Like the hammies or your hamstrings are never more flexible than when you're, when you're first born. His base, your whole body is like fucking rubber. You know what I mean? You know, unless you're one of these, these fucking yoga people, like,

I know some of these people, you know, fucking crawling back around, you know, coming back over the horizon with their head, looking, looking, looking over their fucking privates. You know what I mean? Back at their fucking head that just disappeared underneath them. But some people can do shit like that, but basically regular people. So he would stretch his baby legs every morning. So he would, he would still have that flexibility. The kid never had McDonald's or anything like that. I'll tell you what's fucking unbelievable is he just decided he was going to make it to the NFL and the kid fucking did it. So I mean, that's one on the side of choosing your kids dream yourself as a parent. So don't ever be afraid to decide what your kid is going to be.

As they have shown, you know, from Jim Morrison to Todd Manderich and all that type of stuff, you fucking do that to a kid. Like when they get to college or they get a little bit of freedom, the spikets going to get turned on and they're going to go fucking, they're going to make up for lost time as would have I. So I never judged those people, although the press does pretty harshly. Speaking of which, did anybody see that fucking documentary? I think it was on Amazon. I watched it with my lovely wife last night about those triplets separated at birth. You got to watch it now. Fuck. How do I talk about this? I don't want to ruin it. I'm not going to ruin it. Just watch it and I'll talk about it in like a fucking week or so. I watched that thing

last night and I don't know. That's a tough one to watch as a parent. Put it that way. As a parent, things affect you differently. I'm sorry. Literally doing the thing that I fucking made fun of. Anyway, now, having said all that, I actually live in a house. Okay, so I do have empathy for all you guys living in apartments and studios and that type of shit. I just wish everybody would, you know, I get that you have to go, I've gone out, you know, I got out, ran an errand here or two, you know, what are you going to do? You got to do that. But I mean, I stay away from fucking people. So I just don't get still going to the park where a park is just for people to gather. And even if they fucking close them down, these fucking people still go. It's unbelievable. Especially out here

in LA, you know, because everybody's got to fucking keep working out. I mean, I've been just doing like the fucking prison workout here at home with like the stretches and all freckles. I mean, I've been just doing like the fucking prison workout here at home with like the stretches and all freckles, all freckles, freckles is down six pounds. I mean, I started working out before this bull shit happened, but I'm down six pounds. I'm playing some good drums. I'm starting, you know, I'm going a little fucking nuts here, but trying to do something positive, cleaned out my drum room. I'm going to clean out the rest of the garage today. I have some gecko buddies of mine that live in there. I have one that has been there so long that he's not even scared of me

anymore. He used to be so scared. Like I got the, I got like that gloss finish on the garage floor. You know, the garage is basically the husband's house. Okay. The house is the woman's, you know, so I wanted it to be nice. So the poor thing would try to run away and he would be going like a bastard, but I mean, he could fucking, he could only go half a mile an hour because of the finish I have on the floor. So now he doesn't even run away from me. And then yesterday, another one came in, it was even smaller and he was all aggressive and running away and shit. And I saw it look like he had a piece of plastic stuck to his back. So it's just like, you know, I got, I got a, you know, I got to get that off him. So I got a stick and I fucking

pressed down a little bit on his back and he fucking turned his lizard face around with his little mouth open, which freaked me out. And I dropped the stick. I'm no fucking alligator, man, whatever that guy's name was, uh, crocodile on a right. So I fucking, then I was like, all right, pushing a little hard. I pushed a little harder than he couldn't fucking bite me. And I reached down to pull the plastic off of him and it turned out it was just his reptile skin shedding. So I might have just started the next virus. No, I went in and I washed my fucking hands immediately. So now I got two little geckos out there and I like that they're there. They're fucking cool. It's a safe place, you know, the goddamn snakes can't get them. I have names for them and

shit. And, uh, and that's it. I'm, I'm fucking going, I'm going out of my mind to people. I'm making friends with fucking lizards. I don't know what to tell you. I'm not a reptile guy either. I'm a fucking dog guy. I like dogs. I like horses. I like goats. Cows are cool. Cows are actually beautiful. You know, although I had one bad experience with the fucking cow as far as visually. It was fucking sitting there looking at this cow and it started, you know, they got those giant nostrils and they got the giant tongue. It started fucking cleaning out its nose with its fucking tongue. I mean, it can't pick its nose. So it had to do what it had to do. But ever since I saw that, I was just like, Jesus, Jesus, um, here's a question for you. Have I talked about anything on

this podcast yet? Um, how far right into this am I? I swear to God, I'm going to have a point. It's, oh, here's a question I have. What the fuck is, oh, no, I've been watching episodes, old episodes of Adam 12, took me a second to get back into the vibe, but now I'm into it. And I got to tell you something that I noticed. Um, when I was watching it, uh, yesterday or two days ago, the, uh, there's Martin Milner, who's the, the, I guess he'd say he's the lead and then Kent McCord, Kent McCord. If you look at that, you watch that, uh, an episode of fucking Adam 12, you tell me that Kent McCord isn't Tom Brady's uncle or, or, or some sort of distant relative. It's fucking ridiculous. He's like the fucking, he's the goddamn, uh, Tom Brady

of, uh, TV cops. But you know what's amazing? How much, how much Los Angeles has changed? Like I, I've watched that show and every time they're driving, like one time I noticed that they were definitely down Long Beach. Another time I could tell they were in Venice, but so much of LA has just been torn down and rebuilt and torn down again and rebuilt that I can't even fucking recognize anybody any, any part of the city. Um, but the old cars, I kill her, man. So this one yesterday, this fucking woman just, she cuts this guy off and I'm not even into the story. I was just like, ah, fuck man. Look at that goddamn, uh, it was like one of those 1970s Camaros, but it wasn't like the Z 28. We sort of the one that's had the, uh, the cool engine

in it, but it wasn't all done up. It was green and had that fucking shark nose front. Uh, Gary Crosby's on it. Bing Crosby's, uh, son. Didn't he get all smacked around when he was a kid? One of those guys just abused the shit out of it. Right. Let me, let me make sure before I put that out there. Bing Crosby, child abuse. Was it him or was it the other guy? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was him. I'm going to beat you with a belt, whatever his that's insult to injury when your dad's beating you while crooning. Um, well, he had a short fucking life. He only lived to be 62 years old. What happened? Well, that's what happens. That's what happens when you smack. He died of lung cancer. Ah, poor bastard.

Um, anyway, here's another positive way of looking at the fucking pandemic. I guarantee you three days into everybody back to work. I'm calling this right now. All the brilliant people on social media are going to be fucking, uh, you know, putting up means going like being back at work has me like, uh, where that next pandemic man, you know, whatever the fuck they're going to say for this stupid internet speak. Um, all right, it's definitely time for an ad read because I've just put, I've completely run out of steam here with a fuck. I see ads. God damn it. What do I got here? Do I have no ads? I have one ad stamps.com anybody everybody. Oh, by the way, speaking of ads, I fucking use that. I might, my hand was starting to bug me. It's an old injury I

have from playing drums and, uh, it's in between my thumb and my index finger. You know the meat there, right? The little fucking webtoe. It was all getting sore and it was really bugging me. And I had that CBD fucking roll on and I put it on and it's fucking good as new. It's just like they say it doesn't just numb it. It actually takes the pain away. There's a free read. Um, all right, because I can't remember the name of the company. Next time it comes up. All right, stamps.com everybody, you know, for all our sakes, we need to avoid crowds any way we can right now. Oh, this is great. They look at them fucking rewriting their fucking ad copy perfectly. But what if you need to go to the post office? What if you need postage to send out letters and packages? Ah,

we have the solution stamps.com. Anything you can do with the post office, you can do it stamps.com print postage on demand and skip those lines and crowds at the post office. Plus you can actually save money with discounts that can even you can't even get at the post office. Plus stamps.com is completely, completely online, which saves you time. Um, stamps.com brings all the services of the post office right to your computer and the safety and comfort of your own home office or anywhere else you are hunkering down right now, whether you're in you're a small business, sending invoices and online seller, shipping out products, or you're just working from home and need to mail stuff stamps.com can handle it all with ease. Simply use your computer to print

official US postage 24 seven for any letter, any package, any class of mail, anywhere you want to send. Once your mail is ready, just leave it for your mail carrier schedule is free package, pick up or drop it in a mailbox. No human contact required. It's that simple. And like I said, with stamps.com, you can get great discounts to five cents off every first class stamp and up to 40% off USPS shipping rates. United States post office, uh, postal service, I think. And now in addition to offering discounted US postal service rates stamps.com also offers UPS services with discounts of up to 62% Jesus Christ. That's almost free. Uh, stamps.com is a no brainer, especially now save your time and money and keeping you safe in these crazy times right now. My

listeners get a special offer. That includes a four week trial plus free postage and a digital scale without any long-term commitment. Just go to stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and type in Burr, B U R R that stamps.com enter Burr. Stay safe. My friends. All right. All right. All right. That's good stuff. That's all good stuff. I'll tell you right now if you got stamps.com and then you get butcher box and then you get whatever that CBD fucking company is that I read. I think you're doing pretty good. You do a little stretching, you get some squats going, work the legs and the glutes. So Bill, uh, what is your workout regimen? They didn't ask. All right, I'll tell you. So my stretching is I do the basic, uh,

Brian Kest power yoga, uh, highly recommend his stuff. Um, Brian Kest power yoga workout, which is basically a forward bend. Then you stand up, you stretch, go back a little bit easy and then another forward bend and then you go down into the coat up into the Cobra up dog, whatever they call it, and then the down dog. I do that. I do the basic back stretches. Um, and then what I've added to all of that is I do the runner stretch, the hip thing, you know, that one, these are all yoga terms, I think, and then I don't know how to describe it. It's basically, uh, all right, you know, if you're sitting on your butt, right? Then you try to touch

your toes. I do that one, you know, and then I do the one same position except your, your legs are out in like a V and you try to go down. I've been doing that one. And then another one, you sit cross legged, crisscross, applesauce. They used to say Indian style. You're not supposed to say that anymore or whatever that. And then I, you try to go down in that position. Uh, if you're very tight, like I was, if you just get like a little towel and you wrap it around like you're the bottom of your bed post, it's a great way to kind of pull yourself a little bit towards, go slowly, go easily. I am not taking responsibility. If you fucking herniate your goddamn disc. All right, listen to your body. All right. Um, and then I got a couple of so ass

stretches that I've been doing. It's almost like if you were, you were going to do a, uh, a warrior one, except that then you just lift one hand straight up in the air and then lean over to the side, the opposite side, like whatever side your leg is forward, the one that's bent, the opposite side, you lift your arm up. I don't know, whatever. I bet I just been doing that shit, getting a little more flexibility. And then as far as like, uh, my leg workout, I just do calf raises. I don't do it off a stair. I don't go extra. I just, you know, I just do three sets of those, whatever you want to do. Then I do the ones where you laying on your back and you have your feet on the ground, knees are bent. And then you just basically

doing pelvic thrusts, uh, two count on the way up and then a four count on the way down, three sets of those. I do the donkey kicks and then I do squats with one of those big exercise balls up against the wall. So I keep my back straight, three sets of 15 of those. That's the legs. And then I just do, uh, curls, some tricep shit. I do some back stuff. Uh, one of them that I like the best is the one we act like you're picking up a wheelbarrow. Um, that sort of motion. So you get between your shoulder blades, which is great for someone like me, where my shoulders kind of rounded in forward from doing too much, you know, working out on the front. Uh, and I think that's it. And then I got some of those fucking,

I can't recommend these fucking things enough, man. Everybody gets those foam rollers, which are kind of good, but they just sort of push down and they mush. If you get one of those, they have like these little, uh, I don't know how to say this without everybody laughing, but these hard balls. Okay. And they come in different sizes and different degrees of hardness. All right. You have the smaller ones. I use that up against the wall. You put it between the wall and your shoulder, roll out your shoulder. And then I use the green ones, um, for the front of my legs, back of my legs, my calves, and those ones are fucking incredible. And rather than going up and down the leg, you go across.

Is how I've been doing it. Just look, watch some videos. All right. That's what the fuck I've been doing. And then I just been doing this core workout, uh, which I just do like crunches. I do, uh, you know, some oblique things. And then I do this one, but you just sort of, you're just sitting up, your legs are off. You're in like a V only your ass is on the ground, you know, be for victory doing that. And what's funny is when I do the crunches, um, my daughter thinks it's the funniest thing ever. Whenever I'm doing them, she comes in, she has a smile on her face and she leaps up in the air like Hulk Hogan's finishing move in wrestling and lands butt first right on my stomach. Um,

and, uh, it's bad enough when she just falls backwards, but sometimes she leaps up and literally puts her hands above her head and comes and really, I should, I sent a video of it to Joe Bartner. Can she see cause she's really selling the move with their arms. Um, yeah, she's so damn funny, so damn funny. Um, but we've been having a great time riding bikes in the driveway and playing T ball in the backyard. Um, I say I'm going to do T ball for like another two weeks. And then I'm going to, I'm going to try a couple underhanded to see if she can hit the ball. Oh my God. She gets to that level. I'm going to have to, I'm going to have a little bucket of balls and just fucking underhand in it. And then I'm going to work to overhand.

Yep. Then I'm going to start stretching her in her baby crib and then fucking, sorry, that's what happens. That's what happens. You know, accomplish the things I couldn't, you got to watch out for that. All right. Here we go. Here's another thing too. I listened to a fucking song the other day. This guy was singing a, you know, Trash in LA and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, which everybody does who lives out here. It took me a long time to realize that a lot of people blame Los Angeles for whatever, whatever's wrong with them. You know, I got to get out of here, man. Everybody's like, everybody's like you. We're all trying to find happiness through job success.

It's fleeting. It doesn't, it doesn't like, it's not a sustainable happiness. You know, whereas the other day, like I got more satisfaction. I just came walking, you know, around the corner. I just saw my daughter's shoes, little sneakers sitting on the floor and just that alone, how much that filled me up was better than killing it on stage. Oh, Bill, you getting into your feels, man? All right. Let's, uh, let's read some of the fucking questions here for this week. All right. Helicopter, why a cutter? Hey, Billy Whirly bird, um, Billy Whirly Burd. Um, that's how he wrote it. I had mentioned on a podcast, uh, recently that those, those helicopters that have the, the wire cutters on the front,

if you see these little things sticking out, therefore, so God forbid, if you're flying in a helicopter and you hit a wire, which kills more goddamn pilots, you know, before it goes up into your main rotor, it, uh, hits one of these things and it cuts it. And I was like, I just don't know if that actually works with those high tension wires specifically because they're so fucking, you know, they made out of like steel, aren't they wrapped in steel or some shit? So anyways, this guy writes in, he says, uh, on your MM podcast for March 28th, March 28th, what are you talking about? The March 28th is today. Oh God, do I have the virus? Oh, today's March 30th. Oh, so you must listen to the third, the Thursday one. He said, you were

wondering if those wire cutters on helicopters actually work. I am a helicopter maintenance technician. Dude, that you are the shit. You know how to put together a fucking helicopter? That's amazing. What are you fucking Jeff Dunham? Um, I can say this, I've seen a bell for 12 cut the main power lines feeding the city of yellow knife. Everyone walked away, but the front was smashed in and the frame was bent. Here is an article that talks about it a bit. Oh yeah, let's fucking see this. I want a picture. All right. Well, there's some wires. Where's the fucking helicopter? Griffin chopper hit power lines during military exercise in February. Oh, oh, it's military. So they got the fuck out of there. All right. A worker from

the power corporation specs the severed power line. Wow. Well, that, that looks like that steel cable shit to me. Uh, it has cost 2.4 million to repair power lines near yellow knife after a military helicopter accidentally chopped them in February. A griffon griffon, G R I F F O N. They probably just called Griffin Griffin helicopter hit power lines near yellow knife. That's on my bucket list that you stand up up there, by the way, knocking out power to the entire city for hours. The helicopter was part of a military Arctic Ram training course exercise. Sorry. The Northwest Territories Power Corporation had to run on backup diesel fuel for 10 days after the incident. The corporation trailed the costs

tally the costs of the damage and repairs, including materials, salaries, and hiring a contractor. Yeah, I'm sure that guy didn't overcharge fucking cunt. Uh, Emanuel de Rosa. Joey roses has an uncle up there. The company's president CEO said the military has been very cooperative. They've been, they've been in contact. Where am I? They've been in contact with myself and asked us basically to put the claim together. They provided us with all the information to go through the process. Well, that's cool of them. Obviously they can't accept any liability at this point, but they've certainly pointed. I mean, they can't accept liability. They fucking did it, but they certainly pointed in the appropriate direction to have our claim process said to Rosa.

De Rosa said the company de Rosa said the company will build a military in the coming weeks. Military officials have indicated they are willing to pick up the costs if they have found to be at fault in the incident. Well, yeah, it was there and you hit it that the department of national defense has been conducting its own investigation. Well, the only thing I can say is if for some reason that was considered military property and they accidentally put these power lines on there and the military didn't notice, I think you're paying for that one. They're mounted police. Yeah. If you want to see some creepy pictures, helicopter hits power line photos. Here we go.

These are not good. Oh, Jesus, that thing's on fire. Too dead after helicopter hits power lines explodes. All four passengers and helicopter jumped to the ground when it hit power lines in Beekmonton, New York, and they still dug two died out of four. Two of them had the fucking cat gene and fucking landed on their feet, man. That's a real thing. Understanding your body as you're fucking flying through the air. Some people got that. Some people don't. That's good that that half of them did. I wish they all did, though. Jesus Christ. And I gotta fucking sit through this goddamn commercial. All right, it's an old guy in a laptop and there's an old person looking around at them

and back at a house and now they're visiting their grandkids and there's some happy kid. There's some happy kid. Oh, and they bought her a little piece of shit hatchback, but you know what? She can use it principle.com ABC news. All right, here's the chick who used to be on ESPN who beat cancer. Oh my God, then they hit a fucking house in an apartment building. Wow. There you go. I don't know how people hit those fucking things. There's no reason to ever be flying that goddamn low. You're supposed to listen to what you do is you know where you're going to fly and during your preflight, they have on the map. They'll have a number and it lets you know what the highest obstacle is in each area and then you fly 500 feet above it. That's the

way I was taught. It's the way I was taught, you know, hands 10 and two. That's how I still drive. You know, the deal next thing, you know, your fucking driving with one thumb, you got your arm out the window, you know, ladies, you're putting your makeup on guys, you're fiddling with the fucking radio, Justin, your ball bag, it all goes out the window. All right. That's what happens. You need to have that discipline to understand that bad things can happen to you. All right. All right. Obama droning. Bill, you go off about Obama droning people at picnics without acknowledging the fact that ISIS would have been a major power in a third the time if he hadn't, oh, if he hadn't killed innocent people. Oh, okay. I see how this

works. You know, ISIS wouldn't exist if we didn't fucking go over there and we weren't fucking sucking on their fucking oil nipple, you know, Jimmy Carter said he called it 40 fucking years ago. This country is addicted to oil. He put solar panels on the fucking White House. All right. Reagan came in, fucking took them off and said, drill, baby, drill or whatever the fuck thing that's what the fuck they're doing. Here's one for you. Have you seen how beautiful the fucking air looks without all this, this people driving around and all of this shit? I'm not saying that, that, you know, solar panels when disposed of and all of that, it's probably people probably make an argument that it's even dirtier, but we shouldn't be

fucking over there. It's an outdated form of energy or at the very least we could knock it down a tremendous amount, save a ton of fucking money. My conspiracy theory is as far as I've read the American dollar, the only reason why it has value is because barrels of oil are measured in value by us dollars per barrel, right? It wasn't that what Saddam was trying to do with Hugo Chavez. They were going to start talking about their oils in euros per dollar, uh, euro dollars per barrel and then fucking bankrupt our economy. Isn't that what happened? Anyways, he goes, you can't have it both way. Somebody has to decide who lives and dies and I would rather have a man of sound moral character like Obama doing that than a narcissist like Trump.

So when Trump kills people, it's bad, but if Obama does it, then it's okay. Trump is a self-obsessed narcissist and a pathological liar. You choose you baldheaded fuck. I've never said that I like Trump. You hear these fucking political, I really hope the person that read this is listening. I've said you people who choose by the color of ties are fucking ridiculous. The same people who give Clinton a pass and Obama a pass are all over Bush and Trump and vice versa. And they're all doing the same fucking thing. All right. Now, if you want to talk about being of sound mind, everybody that who's been president before Donald Trump is, is, is miles ahead of this guy. This fucking pandemic hit and he needed to be Roger Starback. He needed to be Tom Brady.

He needed to be Joe Montana and he became Ryan Leaf. He flipped out. He started pointing fingers. He started blaming. He shit himself. He shit himself. All right. I am, I am highly critical of that, highly critical of that, but I don't 100% blame the guy when we all know what the fucking information is and you still see people walking down the street in groups of threes and fours. It's not all his fucking fault. All right. So I'm just trying to, what I'm trying to do is level this off where Obama's a saint and Trump is the worst ever. Okay. My buddy Bartnick said it the best. He goes, Bush is the worst ever. He's the one that got us into this fucking never ending mess over there. Anyway, none of this shit ever would have fucking happened. If any of these

fucking presidents since Jimmy Carter has had the balls to say what Jimmy said, and we all would have been living a better fucking life and there would have been, you know, there would have been, none of this fucking bullshit would have been directed at us. We wouldn't have been over there. Okay. ISIS happened after we got over there. Am I crazy? By the way, they said we went over there because they were part of 9 11 was never proved. They said they had weapons of mass destruction. We never fucking found it. And now we're over there. We can't fucking leave and just fucking, you know, we have a sense of responsibility over there. That's all I'm fucking saying. I'm not

saying the only reason why I pick on Obama is because the media just treats this guy like, you know, he's, he's, he never did anything fucking wrong. And, you know, I don't, you're, you're really looking at him through rose colored glasses. Okay. And there's a very simple solution over there. I think I actually have the balls to say this as a standup comedian. All right. Listen, here, okay. I'm getting a little, I'm getting a little passionate here. So I'm saying crazy things like I have a simple solution to the Middle East. Here's, here's the selfless decision. All right. Is that what we do over here is we embrace new forms of energy and we wean ourselves off of fucking oil. We take advantage of oil that's over here

for whatever we need. We become self fucking sustaining. Okay. Now the problem is the only way to do this is that like you're talking about, you're talking the closest thing to overthrowing the system that we have here because all of these guys, the Trump guy that you hate, the Obama guy that you love, Bush that you hate, Clinton that you love, or the other way around the Clintons that you hate, the Bushes that you love, the Obamas that you hate, the Trump that you love, wherever you stand on the other side of the fence, they all bow down to the same fucking corporations. All right. And when you look at the oil companies and the federal reserve and the banks and all that, what they have done with this fucking Ponzi scheme of horseshit, everybody is tied into the

lie. So if they lose, we all lose. Okay. And the only way you don't lose is if you don't have any fucking money, but even then you will lose, you'll lose, you'll go through whatever, you know, the tanking of the economy. But at some point we need, so what I am suggesting is we gradually, you know, at a quicker pace, look how clean the fucking air is two things. If we just embrace solar fucking power, electric cars and video conferencing and all of these fucking jackasses that are flying every day who really don't need to. Okay. They're just used to face to face meetings. If you do enough video conferencing, which you guys like me, I've done a bunch of party. I just did one with Bill Burt that's going to be coming out. We were like, this was kind of fucking great.

We had a great fucking time. It was, and I didn't really even notice it. So it's a great way. And neither one of us got in our cars, you know, gas powered cars went out and just blew a bunch of fucking burnt fuel into the fucking air. And there's really like, we can, I think that we can do a lot of positive things, but I don't think that we can do it until people stop doing this Red Sox, Yankees, Bruins, Canadians, Celtics, Lakers, whatever the fuck you want, whatever, whatever your rivalry is, Cowboys, Packers, right? San Francisco, Giants, Los Angeles, whatever. If you keep fucking doing this and your team is never wrong and the other team is always fucking wrong, that's exactly what's going to prolong this fucking bullshit. All right. I want a better life.

I don't give a fuck if you're Republican or Democrat, if you like Trump, if you don't, if you like Obama, if you don't, okay? I'm trying to bring people together here. All right? We should, you know, just make some positive fucking steps, which also includes doing it yourself, like buying less shit and leaving a nicer world for your kids, hopefully at some point, we got to turn it around because our parents didn't do it. Their parents didn't do it in defense of them. I don't think that they really understood where they were heading with the lifestyle shit, with what was being sold to them. Although that fucking book Silent Spring did exist in 1962, Rachel Carson called it. So as you heard, I had to type that in to remember a fucking name,

but Silent Spring, I need to read it, but I'm a little afraid to fucking read it. But instead, I'm reading this amazing fucking book. I'm still reading that Steelers book. You know, I've been watching TV with my wife at night because, you know, what kind of dealing with the kiddo here all day long, except when she takes the nap and then I go out and practice drums and I work out and then she's up and then that's it. That's our day. But I've been working my way through this, this book on the Pittsburgh Steelers called their life's work and it's come to their first playoff game of their first Super Bowl season and they're playing the Oakland Raiders and the entire game is up on YouTube.

And Kurt Gowdy is the announcer and Dandy Don Meredith, I believe, is the guy doing the color. And I have to tell you, it is such a fucking man's game. I am only three minutes into this fucking thing. I'm only three minutes into this thing and I just cannot believe what has happened to professional football. And I'm not talking about the hitting, I'm just talking about how much it was geared towards a male, an old school, smoke marbles, die in your late 50s, early 60s, male crowd and it is fucking euphoric. I almost went out and bought a cigar. In fact, do you know what the fuck I'm going to do? When this shit's over, I'm texting Bartnick right now, I'm going to have him over to my house on a special occasion, right? This thing they're

saying now is going to go to April 30th. So then I will not, I've smoked one cigar since January 13th. So I got this shit under control. I'm going to have him over here and I'm going to fucking watch the Steelers versus the Oakland Raiders 1974 and we're going to smoke some fucking sticks. That's what the fuck I'm doing. All right. Okay. Have I lost my mind? I probably lost my mind a little bit considering I said I can solve the Middle East problem easily. People, I just want, what I would love is to just get outside of watching CNN news, Fox News, you know, I'm a liberal, I'm a conservative. There's nothing wrong with doing that, but just, you know, they really fucking, they, you know, it's like the

owners of the Pittsburgh Pirates, you know, they know, they know that the people know that they're fucking them, but they know that they love the Pirates so much, the people are still going to show up so they can get away with being terrible owners, right? Now, in that metaphor, the Pirates is your own country. Okay, they know in the end, you love it so much, where you going? You're still, you're not going anywhere. All right. Did fucking Alec Baldwin leave? He didn't leave. He stayed. They all fucking stayed. All right. So anyway, yeah, buddy, you're misinterpreting my criticism of Obama as if I'm a Trump supporter, I am not by any means. And even if he was the greatest president of all time, just his, his open, how openly fucking racist that guy is.

And, and then the depression that there's, there's no ramifications for it. His open disdain for people who aren't white. I mean, and if you can't fucking see that, agree to disagree. All right, that's it. Okay. Other than that, saying that, I'll tell you, you know, I don't mind Mike Pence. I don't. I know I'm sure he's fucking people think he's crazy with his fucking conservative shit, but the way he carries himself standing next to that fucking guy, I'm like, that's my quarterback. That's my quarterback. Anyway, or maybe it's better that he's away. I have no idea. I don't know who knows. I don't fucking know. But he seems like, like that's the kind of guy I think he's looks like he's got a firm handshake

and you fucking talk to him and he looks you in the eye. He seems like a fucking man to me. Um, all right. He's not shitting himself. All right. Anyway, uh, coronavirus DNA testing. Hey, Bill, I have, I have good news. The conspiracy theorists that wrote in concerned about people's DNA profiles being collected at drive through clinics. Uh, nobody is sequencing your genome from those mouth swabs as a molecular biologist. I can tell you that is an incredibly expensive and difficult to do so from such a sample and requires instrumentation that would not be available to these makeshift clinics, not to mention that it would be extremely illegal. Well, every, every point you made, I was believing who gives a fuck if it's fucking illegal.

You know, coming up with this, well, we don't even pay attention to the fucking rules of treaties that we've signed UN treaties. We wouldn't stop them. Believe it or not, that, that does still make a difference to a corporation and the government. Well, that makes me feel good. I hope so. I hope you're not one of those people that works for this corporation or the government and you sent this feel good email man. Anyway, they were, uh, def definitely correct about the government and corporations taking advantage of hysteria, but that is usually done legally or through passing of new legislation. Um, so, so then you make something illegal, legal. Okay. Well, we went through the problem

steps. Have a look at the earn it bill. If you want to get freaked out, uh, love everything you do, stay safe and go fuck yourself. Yeah. Um, anyway, you know, I think the solution to the, uh, our consumption of oil and, and the amount of air travel is going to have to be regular people like us just, I guess, buying electric cars and, and, you know, if you have like a, like all things comedy, like I want to, uh, you know, hopefully when we come out of this to have pitch meetings, uh, through video conferencing, I would like to do that and just hopefully appeal to all of these studios and be like, the air was so clean and we would like to be a forward thinking company, not only with the projects that we present to you, but by the way that we present

them. Fuck, I should write that down and then just video like pitch shit instead of being another fucking asshole on the four or five. Okay. That last part that I just pitched might be 80% about me and 20% about the environment. Um, anyway, uh, my family is totally freaking out about the virus and we're having a falling out. Oh no, man, you can't, you can't do that. You can't do that. All right. I recently traveled back home from the UK and I am legally required to quarantine at home for 14 days. My family is urgently asking me to self isolate in my own room for every minute of the 14 days and to not step out of my room at all. I think this is ridiculous and unnecessary. So naturally I started arguing with them as stupid, stupid fucking move. I've done everything that

the experts and doctors are telling us to do and I'm a pretty responsible and clean person even before all this started. However, my family is a rationally worried that if I step into the kitchen to grab something to eat or to hang out the living room all alone, I would be spreading the virus and affecting them. Well, they're not wrong, dude. You just flew back to the UK. I think you're being a little selfish that God damn it. If John Coltrane could have locked himself in the attic to write a love supreme and his wife could have brought some food up to him, you could do the same thing. See, it's all how you look at it. All right. If my family told me to stay in a room for 14 fucking days, I would get off on the challenge that they wouldn't think

that I could do it. And I would do, I would stay in there 15 days. The extra day as a fuck you, you thought I was sick. You know, be funny if you actually started getting sick and then you had to be like that thing turned into a werewolf, you know, right? When you're still, you know, mostly you and, but starting, you're still 51% human and only 49% werewolf. So you could just be like, come on, man, suck it up. Stop arguing with them and just stay in there. And just stay in there. When you come out 14 days later, if you did in fact, not have it, don't rub it in their faces. This is an opportunity for you to show them that you can love them for two weeks straight. Okay. Don't be a selfish cunt. Anyways, keep in mind that I left the UK

when it had only about 2000 cases. Those were mainly in London, yet I still wore a mask and sanitize throughout my journey. Well, that's good. My country is partially locked down and we've only got about 80 cases. I think about my family, you know, I have 80 cases where I think my family is being paranoid. I keep telling them we've done what we need to do and more, but they keep thinking about the 0.001% chance they will get sick and die. I keep telling them this way of thinking is really unhealthy and I find it difficult to stay in my room 24 seven and no one in my family is at high risk. I have no symptoms and neither does my sister who traveled with me. Please weigh in on this. I know they are overly worried and paranoid due to the media coverage. What do you think? I

think everybody is right in this situation. It's up to you. If it was me, I would just be like, all right, fuck it. This is what I need in my room. And that's what I would do. And I would just stay in the fucking room and I would just have them bring me meals. Yeah. I mean, people, there's people in prison right now in solitary confinement for like a fucking month. Can you stay in an apartment with a bathroom with people bringing you fucking delicious food? Well, it's England. Let's not get crazy. Bringing you their attempted Indian food. No, the Indian food is good over there. Anyway, thanks. And in case you're wondering, I'm from Oman. Yes, you've got fans everywhere. Nice. Until I pronounce it incorrectly. Hi. Oh, man. I'm from Oman.

How do you pronounce that? Is it Oman? Let's see. How to say Oman. One of the great challenges in this world. Oh, for God's sakes. When is Neil deGrasse Tyson going to just let us off? We get it. You're smart. All right. Fuck. How many fucking times you got to prove it? Oman. Oman. Say Oman. Oman. Say it again, woman. Say it. Oman. Oman. Oman. Oman. Oman. This whole, they're in this whole silence. Am I supposed to be saying it? Is this my study time? Hello? Oman. Oman. Oman. Oman. How many times do I have to say it? Oman. Oman. Oman. Oh, all right. Never forget how to say Oman. You have fans from, I'm from Oman.

Yes, you've got fans everywhere. That's awesome. Isn't there an F1 race in that part of the world? That won't be happening. All right. Lastly, but not leashly. All right. Advice on a sublease. All right. Hey, Bill, my twin brother and I live in different states, but we talk every day. Your podcast is often a part of our discussions because we're both salesmen that spend a lot of time in the car and thoroughly enjoy your show. All right. You know what you need? You need a good fucking stretching routine. If you're in the car specifically, you're so as in your lower body, so you don't get sciatic nerve issues in your fucking, your, your, your vital organs don't get all fucking bunched up. Speaking from experience here, Bill, can you stop preaching on this podcast?

Jesus Christ. Sorry. Look at you. You're inside for a couple of days and all of a sudden you can fucking solve the Middle Eastern problem. I can solve the Middle Eastern problem easily. I said that and I was serious when I said it until I heard it out loud. Jesus Christ, Bill. Anyways, now to why I'm writing you. I recently bought a house. In doing so, I broke my lease with an apartment. I thought I had read the document thoroughly and I was in the clear wrong. According to their rental agreement, I am now subleasing the apartment. So I owe them rent until they find a new tenant. I gave them 45 day notice, paid a hundred hundred dollar administration field to sublease forfitted my security deposit, one month's rent of $645 and

paid for a whole month that I did not live there. Now with the mortgage and surprise rent payment due in a week, I am debating on not paying the rent. I am debt free aside from my mortgage and have perfect credit. I know you're not a lawyer, but I would love your feedback. Should I bail on the rent or stick to the, to the straight and narrow? Thanks for the help. I would just call them up and say you can't afford it and then see if they blink and see if you can just come up with a fucking severance package you can give them. I'd start with that. All right. You know, I don't know what. And then you have to weigh if you want to let the thing go to court because then that's also going to cost your money. But that seems like he could go on people's court

for that. Um, yeah, that's what I would do. I would call them up and say, listen, I can't, I got a kid. I got a kid on the way. If you don't have a kid, just say you have a kid on the way and I just, I can't afford it. Okay. You just, uh, you know, is there a number we can come up with that I can just give you some what's left of my savings and we can just walk away from this pitch. How about it? I can I just give you two months rent? All right. I'll give you two months rent and we just, you know, but then they have some sort of legal document drawn up that fucking cancels that other one. I would try to negotiate with this person first. All right. Because believe me, there's been, I bet there's been plenty of people that just

fucking blew it off and this person probably doesn't want to have to go to court again. That's, I would bet on that. Try that first. Let me know how it goes. All right. That is the podcast and I have some apologies to make. Number one, I apologize for saying that I could fucking solve the Middle Eastern problem easily. Number two, I apologize if, uh, if anyway, I tried to make it seem like I was supporting Trump and not Obama. I'm just trying to get people to think, you know, not do the home team thing and, uh, what else? I was also wrong about this pandemic. I thought it was not going to be a big deal and it was going to be over in two weeks. I did not bet on people continuing to walk in groups, groups of threes and fours.

By the way, how fucking bad are you as a parent that your kid still goes to spring break and also goes on TV and he's not worried about you kicking his fucking ass? I mean, that is just complete fucking failure as a parent. I know everybody gets mad at those kids, but, you know, you can't get mad at kids who has shitty fucking parents that, you know, there's obviously no fucking ramifications for what they're doing. Unbelievable. All right. I'm going to continue to do exactly what the fuck they're telling me. I'm going to continue to stay inside every couple, two, three days. We go for a drive. Um, and that's it. It's just me, my wife and my lovely daughter,

my soon to be a prospect, first woman to make it into MLB daughter crushing it. That's it. All right. That's the podcast. Hope I brought you some laughs. Whatever people don't take what I'm saying during this time too fucking seriously. There's not a lot to talk about. There's not a lot going on in the news. I'm not watching the news and I'm not really living a life beyond my fucking house and walking around the block. So, uh, other than that, I mean, I don't know the other than occasionally running a fucking errand. So I'm going to go a little fucking nuts too, but I think it's big to stay positive here. Don't complain and just think about, you know, you know, there's people in fucking prison right now,

you know, newly gone to prison, don't know how to fight and someone wants to fuck them in the ass and they know it's coming. All right. Just always remember that story. Okay. You're doing, they would fucking take that dick in the ass a hundred times over to then get out of prison and just live your fucking pandemic life. Trust me. Well, wait a minute. They wouldn't take a hundred dicks in the ass. I got to work on the math on that, but somewhere in there is a life lesson. All right. Go fuck yourselves. I'll check in on you on Thursday.