Monday Morning Podcast - Monday Morning Podcast 5-16-22
Episode Date: May 16, 2022Bill rambles about Northern California, fasting, and home remedies....
Transcript
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Hey what's going on it's Bill Burr and it's time for the Monday morning
podcast for Monday May 16th 2022. How's it going man? How are you? I am Taylor two
cities. Taylor Red Teddy's over here for Old Freckles. Two game sevens this
weekend for the Boston sports fan because you know what the deal is we're
always in it man. Oh sorry. Bad news first the Boston Bruins lose to the
Carolina Hurricanes formally known as the Hotfoot Wailas. I know it was a great
series it went seven games and they were games where we look like the better
team and then games where they look like the better team and it was a pretty
hard fought series I thought you know at the end of the day I did think
Carolina was you know faster more skilled better team or whatever but the fact
that we took them seven games and scared the shit out of them right to the
very end you know Bruins team showed a lot of hat so maybe you know they had a
couple of pieces and next year who knows so I was happy I still have a Bruins
hoodie on today and then the good news your Boston Celtics win another playoff
series win another game seven and advance past the defending champion
Milwaukee Bucks. Yeah you know what I got to be honest with you I usually get
nervous on a game seven but I saw the look on Jason Tatum's face after they
went around the garden they showed all the legends that were there I remember
the last one they showed we had Danny Ainge there but he still works for the
team but Cedric Maxwell cornbread Maxwell was there from the famous 1981 team
get on my back I'll carry you he was there did I see ML Carr I don't know I
had kids running around me trying to get the game on but I just saw the look on
Tatum's face and I was just like this guy is not gonna let us lose and I got to
be honest with you how about Grant Williams the guy I'm always talking about
who can't get a fucking call to go his way first time ever in his Celtic career
he was the high scorer and the man does it in a game seven to close out the
defending champion Milwaukee Bucks Peyton Pritchard was big down the stretch
with a bunch of threes Al Horford played out of his mind this series Jalen Brown
Jalen Brown is always and I don't know man I think you know we got as good as
shot as the heat do I know the heat always have a good team so I don't know
anything about those guys but I'm really excited you know what it sucks to be all
the way out here in LA when the Celtics and Bruins have a game seven the
atmosphere in Boston must have been great but I will tell you one of the best
things about the Celtics winning another playoff series out here is right after
they win they go to the local you know sports show that has former Laker great
Michael Cooper on it and he hates the Celtics like no one I've ever seen and it
was so awesome he just would not give it up to the Celtics he's like oh if they
had Middleton they had Middleton you know Bucks win this series and all this
stuff and all he was talking about was how the Bucks blew it he didn't talk
about the incredible game that the Celtics played or the incredible series
that they played you know I mean if you want to talk about blowing something we
blew that was that the game four we blew that one was it game four it was a
game three we had him one of those games we let it slip away in the fourth
quarter so I mean I don't know what he was talking about I just makes me so
happy that he hates the Celtics and knowing that the Celtics one is really
bothering him made it even though he didn't say he didn't say one thing he's
just like oh you know if you're gonna leave him open like that I mean look
he's wide oh you can knock that down all day oh yeah oh yeah is that how it is
Michael we'll see all right so who knows Michael Cooper's not happy which means
the Celtics fans are which is awesome we are advancing to the Eastern Conference
finals very excited about that and the Red Sox actually won a series I think we
took two out of three from the Rangers I missed all the games because I was on
the road but I was keeping track of them and I saw that the Yankees finally lost
and so I text Verzi yesterday I'm like dude yank last time Yankees played they
played they're playing the Orioles today you got a fucking barium you got to put a
bet and he goes they already won today I was like fuck that was the game that was
the layup so anyways congratulations the Boston Celtics and great great year for
the for the Bruins I definitely think we're moving in the the right direction
we're always in there and I know we lost in the first round but I'm still you
know optimistic about the direction that we're going in and also the fact that
Tuka Rusk retired so we had all new blood in goal I think we're doing all
right all right plowing ahead here I am still doing the intermittent fasting it
and intermittent fasting I haven't stepped on the scale I was a buck 82 and a
half last time I got on the scale I'd like to be 10 pounds lighter so I've
been doing that and I gotta be honest with you after like two days you just
sort of settle into it it's not that big a deal eight hours eating 16 hours are
not eating so like right now I haven't eaten yet geez my kids are louder than
hell today let's see here I have yeah 13 hours 29 minutes oh I have to go 16
hours so I still have two and a half hours to go what oh yeah it's eight in
the morning that's right I can eat around 10 oh Jesus but you know it's been
good for like no late night eating which is huge especially when you're on the
road you're depressed you know I miss my wife I miss my kids let's see here I
guess I could talk about the the friggin trip I just had amazing trip I did
Sacramento Fresno in Oakland California and I went out with Dean del Rey and he's
he's from up there so he was excited to get back up there and we just sort of
walked around like every town like the first day I flew up to Sacramento landed
day of the show so I kind of sequestered myself in the hotel room right and went
out did the shows at the first show my god lunatics lunatics first not lunatics
it was just like three or four lunatics I had a debate with the guy about Tom
Brady deflate gate this is in Sacramento California and fucking what is it
it's in May of 2022 so I effortlessly shut him the fuck up once I told him the
whole fucking details of that goddamn case and then also I asked him what he
was and he was a Raiders fan I'm like oh the Raiders what is your what is your
motto if you ain't cheating you ain't trying shut the fuck up
imagine a Raider fan bringing up cheating just imagine that oh those fucking babies
and they talk about the tuck rule and of course oh that that that that fucking
roughing the passer in 1970s say no fucking problem with that one that one
that helped him go to the Super Bowl that in the fact that Franco Harris and
Rocky Blyre both went down in the same game yeah those all those three down you
know that no thanks to the Steelers well that's actually a bad example that's
just an injury but literally shit fucking call gave the Raiders the game in
1976 a shit fucking rule at least ours was a rule it's a stupid rule I don't
agree with it I think it's a fucking fumble and a Raider fan will then say
we'll just pinch that part out there and ignore the roughing the passer rule
anyway then I was talking about abortion and some woman brought up you know rape
babies you know then got into that debate and then then then that topics on
the table and that's my job now I have to riff about rape babies thanks a lot
lady acting like you were at the fucking Senate or wherever the hell it is that
they pass laws in this country and then I had somebody else over on the I don't
know what they were I don't know I'm putting together a new hour whenever I
put together a new hour I'm like heavily trashing women I don't know why this
happens I think because I don't have any material I go into a defensive mode so
the old index fingers point at everybody else and not myself so you know it is
what it is eventually by the time I shoot my special I'm pointing more at
myself it becomes a more balanced hour and 15 minutes but right now I'm gonna
tell you we're a little fucking top-heavy and this weekend when I go to
Florida yes you can look forward to that although I don't think it's I don't
think I'm considered misogynistic in Florida I think I'm considered wholesome
and have hemp family values I don't know how it works down there I don't
pretend to understand Florida I mean when you're a state that actually
confuses people it even you confuse the rest of the South when the rest of the
South is going hey you might want to dial it back a little there I mean you
know you're getting after it and you know I don't fault the people of
Florida okay if every time I walked out to my mailbox I have to like look for a
body of water where literally a dinosaur could come out of it chomp on my leg
and start doing death rolls as he spins my leg out of my fucking hip socket you
know I'll also fuck it up a brand-new pair of wranglers you know I don't need
that shit I don't need that shit I'm at that's just that's insanity by the way
condolences you got to do this every year to Toronto Maple Leaf fans somebody
sent me the funniest fucking picture and I just I couldn't post it just because
it's just like Maple Leaf fans go through enough you know those two guys
that carry out the cup every year wearing white gloves somebody Photoshop
the Stanley Cup out of the photo and put a golf bag that was in the Toronto Maple
Leafs colors with the Maple Leaf insignia oh my god brutal by the way
very quietly because it is you know hockey and no one really pays attention to
it very quietly the Tampa Bay Lightning are going for a three-peat when was the
last time somebody won three Stanley Cups in a row well boy boy howdy I'll
tell you that was when that was the 80 81 82 83 82 83 any 182 83 yeah that was
the last time someone won three in a row and that team actually won four in a
row from 1980 to 1983 the New York Islanders with the late great Mike
bossy one four in a row one four in a row but no one has won three in a row
since then there's been people winning back-to-back like Edmonton went back
to back in 84 85 87 88 who else the penguins won 91 92 Detroit won like 97
98 then it gets foggy for me brain gets older and I don't remember I want to say
the penguins did they go back to back in the 2000s or 2000 teens I can't remember
I don't know but it's been a while it's been a long fucking time since since
old freckles was 15 years old since the last time somebody won three Stanley
Cups in a row and I got to tell you now that the Maple Leafs are because it
wants to Bruins lose I root for the fucking Maple Leafs you know what I mean
you got to do it they're the greatest fans in sports and I don't think you can
argue it considering I'm gonna be 54 years old next month and the fucking
Maple Leafs have not won it in my lifetime and these guys are like still
selling out every single game and it's the hardest ticket to get you have to
literally go up there and go scalp tickets I know somebody you know that
was working for the NHL network and I said hey I'm in Toronto can you get me
tickets he goes dude I have it I have a hookup with every single city except that
one you can't get it even the NHL can't get him you got to stand outside and
scalp tickets I mean you would think that they would they were winning a cup
every other year out there 54 years and this is what fascinates me is the
Rangers their drought was from 1940 to 1994 that was 54 years and people were
chanting 1940 at them and making t-shirt Islander fans and all of them were doing
that just torturing them and I'll show you how this is why Canada has the
reputation for being for the perception of being nice is nobody is
chanting 1967 at him is it because it's all 1967 if it was 1970 but that that
1955 but they didn't even chant that to the fucking the Red Wings and the Red
Wings went 65 they went like 42 years or whatever what I'm saying right now what
you guys think is is is like a like you're cursed how many years at this
point I think you got it you got to go half a cent when there's 30 fucking
teams well like say like the NFL there's 32 fucking teams so if you win one once
every three decades you can't your average that's average once every three
decades so you'd have to go at least 50 years before anybody could say you're
fucking cursed nobody even says the Browns are cursed there's no story there's
no Billy goat there's no fucking you know they they sold Jim Brown to go
fucking you know make a musical down there in Toledo nothing nothing it's
just they have not won they won an NFL title in 1965 I want to say 64 65 and I
got to be honest with you I count that fucking thing this whole thing where you
don't count championships until Super Bowls is the stupidest fucking thing ever
so you're telling me Jim Brown auto Grammy telling me these guys weren't
champions yeah the fuck out of you you know but the fucking you know Yankees
and and fucking Canadians can count titles all the way back to a hundred
years ago with the Canadians doesn't make any sense to me I always just found
it weird well Bill we realize that because you brought it up 9,000 times
all right well until people start walking around saying the Green Bay
Packers are the fucking Yankees Canadians Celtics and fucking Patriots
no I can't say Patriots dealers that's the same fucking sport yeah that they
Packers are yeah they're the greatest they won like four Super Bowls in like
11 NFL titles I mean they've won in every fucking era all right sorry I've
got my get my period here let me just let's talk about some fun shit so the
next day after we after I do my rape baby early show and then the second show
they were just it was fucking butterman it was amazing both shows were awesome
but the second show was incredible so I'm walking around Sacramento a city that
really gets a bad reputation you know I'm not gonna lie to you I went by two
bail bonds you know offices and a Scientology building in like fucking
three blocks it's just like wow you can get into all kinds of shit all kinds of
shit out here by the way Scientology doesn't does I don't know my out of my
mind I feel like it gets more shit than it deserves you know what you guys do if
I see find out I secretly joined no I think it gets more shit than it
deserves you know first fucked up as they say it is for as culty as it is I
got one question where are the bodies where are they I mean I'm just saying
it's like a sports fan I need to see the hardware as a former Catholic I mean we
got bodies stacked up we got pedophilia we got we got torture we have
crusades well what do they got little mind control couple of fucking
disgruntled sitcom stars I just don't see I don't see it it's like people
trash in Russia can you believe they invaded that country yeah that's what
powerful countries do you haven't noticed that don't you see a similarity in
what they're doing and possibly maybe another country that you might know a
little better might have done not condoning not condoning any of that by
the way so we ended up the next day we were driving down to Fresno so I had a
nice morning and I found this pipe and tobacco store that was right next to the
original tower records in the tower section which I had never been to in
Sacramento so we went down there I got a coffee I became a coffee drinker somehow
when make while making this movie every once in a while I'll tell you know when
you're old when you find one pistachio in the pocket of your sweatpants I mean
tell me that's not some old man shit I'll save this for later I mean I know my
kids don't eat pistachios because I can't blame them like they dropped it on
the floor and I picked it up anyway yeah kind of became a coffee drinker and
actually really like it now what do I go with I go with the cappuccino I get
excited if they do the little design and my goal as a new coffee drinkers I'm
never gonna have a cup of Starbucks just not I think it was a good idea it just
fucking got out of control I just look at them like they have to be like the
Burger King of like coffee you know I mean not knocking up you know a burger
Burger King but you know if there's a better one a mom and pop one around the
corner like I went to who's it I went to Fulton Street coffee in Fresno and at
an absolutely delicious cup of coffee I forget what the name of the place where
I got the coffee was in Sacramento but actually I went to Sacramento me and
Dean I got bought a little cigar and I had the fucking the cappuccino so you
know I was flying right fucking caffeine and tobacco I'm walking down like one of
those little side streets in the tower section had all these great houses great
neighborhood a couple of classic cars Dean posted a bottom was under see there
was a stew to Baker there was a first-generation F-100 the front end before
the Sanford and Sun front end so a late 40s Ford and there was one other one I
can't remember what it was it was a dodge I think it was a dodge or something
like that but we walked up just incredibly peaceful street houses perfect
little size like original ones you could tell like mid-century ones I think no a
mid-century is those weird-looking ones the Brady Bunch style house it wasn't
like that it was like before that just sat there like you know you know talking
about comedy and all of this shit and Dean telling me about living up that way
and I just smoking a cigar I had a great time and ubered back it's funny we
got the same Uber driver both ways and we cruise down to Fresno Fresno which is
one of my favorite fucking cities it's I don't know I just like it it's a great
pop level of population downtown areas not like you know it's quiet and I know
they go through their struggles I know they got all kinds of shit going on up
there but it's still really good people up there I took a picture this posted on
my stories this incredible mural up there which just said Fresno almost looked
like a stamp or something like that and then within the letters it had like you
know the that classic theater that I always want to call the the Warner
theater or something like that I think that's what it was was right next to that
Fulton Street coffee but and I played a theater there remember a long time ago I
got to find out which one I played but I know Kinnison played that one but I was
at a different venue but anyway we went to the CVS right next door to it right
it's a couple of homeless people fucking sleeping out front and some guy
standing there right typical one of these fucking cities that is just like
America's kind of turn in a blind eye to right but great people right so we
fucking go in there and I'll tell you when you get a city that starts
struggling financially even when you go into the chain they don't get the bet
the same shit I go in the CVS to go buy some some fucking vitamin C gummies they
don't have the 500 milligram they don't have the 750 they're only giving them
250 250 milligrams I buy him and I eat him and they taste fucking weird there's
just something about them they were gummies and Dean tried a couple those
things taste weird right go yeah I go I go that's Fresno that's Fresno vitamin C
there's something going on there feel like they don't want this city to make
it so I left it on the table at the coffee place figure some homeless guy
could come by and grab it so he doesn't get scurvy then we walked we walked back
to the hotel we went to a minor league ballpark where Leonard Skinnerd was
playing so they had their whole fucking stage was set up and all that it was
fucking awesome and and then we went by a pawn shop and they had an entry level
sonar kit in the window and then they also had a they had one of those Apollo
three-speed bikes from when I was a kid with the the slick on the back and the
small attire on the front it was a 1968 which was the year I was born guy wanted
way too much money for it they're going for like six seven hundred bucks the guy
wanted like he's saying two grand which is so funny like two grand for that and
then you just go on eBay it's like that's funny this one's six hundred seventy
five bucks and it's in better condition but anyway so and once again I got a
coffee there had the oh no that was Fresno yeah that was Fresno that was the
next day that was the second day and we just walked all around there looking at
the architecture and all of it it just looked like what a city looked like when
I was a kid in the early 70s and I mean that in a good way and I'm gonna call my
agent at some point I would love to do a run there like the Warner theater go to
a minor league game and you know maybe finally go to Yosemite after that maybe
bring the kids up and everybody everybody can go over there that could be
really cool and then the last day we went to we did the Oracle in Oakland
with a Golden State Warriors used to play and all these amazing bands had
performed there and I was thinking of all the basketball players I saw when I
was growing up knowing they all played in there you know Dr. J Larry Magic
Michael Sidney Moncrief Tree Rollins Moses Malone George Gervin Daryl Dawkins
Mocheaks Andrew Tony that great fucking team world be free Jack Sigma Rick
Roby Eric Ferdstein I'm going really super obscure here or Orlando Woolrich I
haven't named one warrior yet dare I say will Chamberlain maybe back towards the
end of his career when he played for the Lakers all of those guys with their
short shorts were in there playing above the rim I think the 74 and 76
championship teams were one in that building and then every fucking band
every band the speed metal scene started up that way and all of those bands ended
up headlining that place and then all freckles was there I tell you what's
really cool about that place is they have a hole in the wall
Dirk Nowitzki after a playoff loss to Golden State picked up a fucking trash
can and I swear to God threw it like 30 feet in the fucking air and put a hole in
the wall up there and they put a piece of hard plastic over it and then they put
like one of the NBA final t-shirts that the the fans wore right above it to
sort of mark the year that it was I thought that was really cool
Dirk Nowitzki a champion himself for the Dallas Mavericks Mark Aguirre played
in that building Isaiah Thomas Thomas Thomas Bill Lampier Mark Mohorn Vinny
Johnson Scotty Pippen a right bill we get it Dominique Wilkins David Thompson
all right I don't know why downtown Freddie Brown Dennis Johnson there's
like 52 year old right now going yeah I had that poster and we got to play it
but before we went there we actually went to Oakland and all the years I was
doing stand-up I always played San Francisco and I never played out in
Oakland Oakland was more the black comedian circuit and white guys went to
San Francisco that's how it was it was segregated and I never fucking walked
around Oakland and I was there downtown Oakland and I absolutely fucking loved
it I went down I got some barbecue fucked up by getting the hot the hottest
version of it I was thinking they for some reason they were they were gonna
have it on the side and they didn't they just took a paint roll and put it all
over all of it but I toughed it out had some delicious brisket ribs and chicken
went with the three three meat platter couldn't finish it dropped it off for
the homeless should have left a vitamin water for him but I had a great time
there and then we went out we did the Oracle could not have had a better time
shout out to Gretchen fellow Masshole treatness right get got me some cigars
and afterwards they had a private room in there with a Metallica pinball machine
and then you walked into like this speakeas and you could like smoke a
cigar in the Oracle it was amazing the crowd was amazing all the crowds
throughout that whole tour was just fucking awesome and I already miss it
like I want to go back there and I was just telling my wife how I wanted to
maybe go up there and maybe stay in San Francisco I do some punchline gigs then
we could go over the bridge into Oakland and check out what's going on over
there because I know I don't know all the nerds bought up San Francisco so all
the fucking white people on the line had to move into Oakland which pushed the
black people you know I always fucking happens it's so stupid I don't understand
it I was actually joking on stage that the white people that got pushed out of
San Francisco should hire the homeless as hit men to kill the nerds and every
day if they they got to bring three heads or three nerd heads over the bridge
and then they get this stipend and once you clear out enough of them or the
nerds get the message to stop buying the Silicon Valley then they can move back
and then Oakland can be what it was I'm pitching that knowing nothing about that
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right there in the in the in the in the lobby somebody was getting married and
then there was like a whole bunch of guys on motorcycles doing like donuts and
revving the engines and everything was pretty fucking cool so all of a sudden
you know I'm starting to fall asleep you know I'm like Joshua except I don't have
pizza rolls in the oven and all of a sudden it's just this disgusting fucking
noise when it's such a place there's been a fire detected within the building
please evacuate please use the staircase it did it fucking the whole time it
wouldn't stop so I call club soda Kenny I'm like is this legit he's like I call
downstairs they said there's a fire on the second floor and I'm like alright and
we fucking go out in the stairs you can't you please this is not a fucking drill
you're gonna use this death so we go there and there's like I don't know
everybody in the hotel is walking down the same staircase and there's like old
people and we keep having to stop on the stairs there's like a traffic jam of
people going down the stairs and I just kept looking down the stairway stairwell
looking for smoke because I'm like if this fire is getting out of control how
slowly we're going down here at some point we're gonna have to make a decision
to trample the elderly to get out of here I always thought back in the day all
this staircase right there I will say this if you're high enough up there's
gonna be traffic because people who are physically compromised Bill why couldn't
you pick up an elderly person and run with them that's what I would like to
think that I would do it all depends on how close the flames are right that would
be the deal anyway we get like we walk from the 10th floor it's one of these
places where you got to watch two flights to get down to the next floor so we
went from the 10th floor all the way down to the fourth floor and then they
just go attention please the emergency is over you can go back to your room and
then everybody on the stairs is just like oh what the fuck it's just like hey
we didn't burn to death I was kind of thinking because the sprinklers weren't
on that we were gonna be okay and that's my fire story you know what thank God
that hotel had simply safe S I M P L I S A F E calm all right solo stove
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com sorry alright what do we got here somebody wants to talk about intermittent
fasting something that I've been doing let me see how many days I've been doing
this shit I'll let you guys know I should go step on the scale see if I've
lost any weight here I must have I've been doing it I did it one two three four
five six seven eight nine ten eleven twelve since since May 6th well May 5th
is when I started I've done at least 16 hours occasionally a little over 17
every single day except Sunday night the 8th but I've done it one two three four
five six seven days in a row had a day off and then one two three days in a row
this looks like a fucking baseball spec schedule and yeah my stomach is going
down I'm hitting the gym after this and then I'm gonna have I have a little bit
of lunch here I'll let you know how it's going intermittent fasting hello mr.
Burr oh by the way I'm now that I'm into the wonderful world of coffee I want you
guys all these cities I go to you tell me the fucking best cup of coffee and I'm
gonna fucking swing by and check it out I'm going to Florida I'm in Tampa so you
know I got to go down to Ebor city to get me a cigar or something let me know
what the place is out there all right intermittent fasting hello mr. Burr
just writing to tell you that intermittent intermittent fasting actually
works well good fantastic he goes I became a fat fuck during the early days
of the pandemic I'm six feet and was a little over 225 pounds driving down the
road one day I hit a pothole and felt my titty jiggle oh no and that was the
motivation I needed to get my to get to work on myself well that's good man at
some point you got to be ashamed of yourself to turn it around and there's
nothing wrong with being ashamed of yourself if you're ashamed of yourself
that no that means that you know you can do better which means you got some
pride buried underneath all that bacon fat started running until gyms open and
then got into cardio and weights no matter what I couldn't get under 208
pounds then I tried intermittent fasting and from August to my birthday in late
November the pounds melted off me my goal was to be under 190 pounds by my
birthday on November 25th and I hit my goal weighing in at 189.4 pounds that's
fucking awesome he goes I did 17 hours no eating and 7 hours eating during the
17 hours with no calories it was all water or tea I was determined and got
her done at 42 years old I'm healthier than ever I've ever been and never going
back to being jiggly tits yeah and you drive a truck too man so I mean that's
obviously a lot of sitting down and not you know eating well I remember when I
was living the life of a trucker when I was doing college cakes and all that my
my my go-to place was fucking subway I told you all that shit I get a large
stack of pancakes and try to go the whole fucking day and then I get a six in
subway sandwich at the end of the day hopefully this college paid me anyway
can't wait to see your shows in Toronto in August and Windsor in October and
really hope my leafs don't crap out yet again my heart can't take much more of
their shenanigans that's awesome man I'm hoping this intermittent fasting is
gonna get me down to my goal of a buck 72 in and around my birthday I think I
waited too long I don't know we'll see we'll see where I'm at I'll keep you
guys posted tell me where are you from Billy boy Billy boy tell me where are
you from charming Billy what size that da da da da da da da da da da da da da
he's a young boy that wants to go with scouting like a scout all right where are
you from Bill hey Billy boy OD OD that's OD EE not sure if you saw saw it
floating around Twitter but there was an article written by a guy who said it's
racist when people ask where he's from and why I ask people where they're from
all the time if they have an accent because the rest of the world interests
me anyways he says I'm a Pakistani born American and I drive uber slash lift and
anything else they'll let me I love it when people ask me where I'm from
because it makes me in my country more human to them how many Pakistani people
do you know one and then there's a couple others that I might know but I'm
not going to ask them what they are because then they'll be you know if
they're Indian or they're not Pakistani you know you guys are like fucking you
know Michigan and Ohio State I don't want to start that shit up and you're in a
fairly diverse city exactly Bill probably only a few if any so that's why I
love it I don't like how you just fucking assume that shit even though you were
right sometimes I just say one of those countries that gets bombed a lot some
laughs some apologize on behalf of their army so I we're not bombing you guys I
thought that was India I don't want to start it up I know you guys are problem
is is people in Pakistan in India they just there they've led Zeppelin fans
alright and then Zeppelin wrote that song cashmere and then that just started
the whole shit up again as far as I know that's what's going on up there so I
ask so I say ask me where I'm from and don't worry about the occasional
insecure guy who doesn't like to hear it thank you for all the laughter well yeah
I mean it's kind of like it's probably because they got treated like shit I
mean it's a difference between like hey man where you from that's a cool accent
as like you know as being like dude where the fuck are you from I mean that's
not a good one all right remedies I hey Billy drum solo king someone wrote in
about home remedies I married a black woman who's a bit older than me but her
mom is from the generation of home remedies earaches take a bottle of sweet
oil warm it up under running water and what do you do with it do you drink it
or pour it in your ear I wouldn't think you want to pour in your ear when warm
oh here we go when warm not hot pour a cap full in your ear what sore throat
gargle with peroxide and water there are countless others but these are a few
enjoy this summer with the family in the playoffs peroxide and water I think
Donald Trump thought that cured COVID all right I would say I do I have any
fucking home remedies no I was I was the Vicks vapor rub generation when you had
a cold you took that shit and you just rubbed it on your chest yeah and you
smelled like a fucking stick of wintergreen gum didn't work it was
another one you put a towel over your head in your status you sat above
steaming water to try to clear out your nasal passages but I just know other
ones like if you're in the shower if you're taking a shower the end of a hot
shower if you turn on turn it on cold it sucks but once you get used to it you
I can't even tell you how fucking alive you feel I know a hot shower is great but
I'm telling you when you go the other way at the end of it there's something
about it it just it fucking gives you a jolt of adrenaline I feel way more awake
when I do it but please keep the home remedies coming here here's I would love
one when you get a sore throat from screaming shit jokes Mexican hiccup
remedies hey there Billy burrito recently a listener emailed you talking about
old family remedies and reminded me of one that I still hold true to this day
it was passed down to me by my mother and to her mother and so on first of all
I was born and raised in Mexico and I now live in Miami you know what's funny
there's a a farmer that I that I'm following growing his own food on
Instagram I'll tweet it out you guys to check it out it's inspiring me to I
always wanted to have like a home garden I mean I've had like you know tomato
plants out here stuff like that but have it like you know like lettuce and all of
that type of stuff because they're saying once again they're changing the laws so
they they don't have to write GMOs when they're in your food or whatever if you
give a fuck about something like that it's interesting anyway first of all
I was born and raised in Mexico and I now live in Miami my mom's side of the
family is completely Mexican and as I'm sure you know us Mexican loves love
limes and we also love drinking I mean what's the hate about that so the remedy
is for the for the hiccups it works a hundred percent of the time if you help
it a bit what what do you mean help it okay when you have the hiccups get a
lime slice it in half grab one half and pour some in Worcestershire Worcestershire
sauce on it had to Google how to spell that in Mexico we call it salsa in
Glacier English sauce oh all right and then just bite into the half lime with
the Worcestershire sauce on it it's going to be super sour and intense but
all that flavor sort of shocks your body and we'll sort of forget about the
hiccups so you scare yourself with flavor just bite into the lime and
swallow all the lime juice with the Worcestershire sauce on it you might
get the need to hiccup again but just fight it a bit and your hiccups will be
gone I do this whenever I have the hiccups and it's never failed me that's
fucking wild I want to keep exploring this because I know somebody's gonna have
like some fucking cures that work who knows like conspiracy theory then who
knows maybe you don't have to go to the CVS and Fresno where they have the funny
taste in fucking you know the funny taste in fucking vitamin C gummies anyway
love everything you do I've been a fan since I was 15 I'm 28 now wow I saw you
in Hollywood Florida Florida when you came down in 2021 and absolutely killed
it hope to see again soon well that's awesome man thank you so much that's
always cool when somebody who's not white likes me you know you look all
right my shit jokes are crossing lot racial lines I love it all right
underrated working with people who know the next step you don't have to ask for
the hammer or reach for the next piece of plywood it doesn't matter what you're
doing if the person you're working with can handle doing what they're doing and
also seeing the project as a whole I'm writing this because I'm currently
experiencing that unlike the last Dumbo who slowed me down so much that I missed
my own anniversary dinner to meet a contractual deadline now wait a minute
you're blaming the person who hands you the shit I don't know you should have
been cracking the whip a little fucking hard is that politically incorrect as a
white person to use that fucking expression let's see let's look that up
we'll end the podcast on that is it pass a I do know as a white person you
wouldn't want to say that to a black person I can pretty much guess that
all right you guys don't start stepping it up you're gonna make me have to start
cracking the whip excuse me all right cracking the whip I mean I don't you
know need to be origin or maybe it's a horse racing thing we'll see origin come
on oh I have the slowest internet crack the whip an expression for using one's
authority to urge subordinates to work harder or behave better crack the whip
traces its origins to the 17th century horse-drawn wagon drivers according to
the American heritage dictionary of idioms cracking the whip racism claim
fails cracking the whip is not a racial term I love them white people do that
shit actually it's not a racial term even reminds you of slavery so I'm gonna
continue saying it while I do the Tomahawk job just because that's what
human beings do you can't tell me what to do I'm gonna take it to a to that
level anyway that is the podcast ladies and gentlemen the Celtics move on the
Red Sox win a fucking series for the first time since April I believe the
Yankees I feel like lost a game for the first time since April they're absolutely
killing it and the fucking shit talking blue jays are just sitting in the middle
of the pack this is the movie huh this looks like one of those three star
movies that you can wait until it goes to home video till it goes to blockbuster
we'll see though anyway the Bruins the Bruins go home for this for the goddamn
summer oh well whatever you can't have everything all right that's it I'm gonna
say you can't have your cake and eat it I was like wait was that a reference to
slavery you know that was a cakewalk I mean you how do you even keep up to it
it's so funny like how many fucking sayings came out of slavery that stuck
around you know there weren't any slaves up north we didn't come around with we
didn't come up with any sayings oh dude this is gonna be like a tea party that's
when you I came from throwing people's lawn furniture over the fucking the
back railing of a porch or something and so reference to it I don't fucking know
what it is all right that's it go fuck yourselves and I'll check in on you on
Thursday