Monday Morning Podcast - Monday Morning Podcast 6-6-16

Episode Date: June 7, 2016

Bill rambles about dying your hair, sandwiches and blue LAY-DEEZ!

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Byrd. It's time for the Monday Money Podcast for Monday, June 6th, 2016. This is like the fifth fucking time I've tried to start this thing, because, I don't know, I just had an aborted landing. Well, I didn't have one. The pilot had one, and I was riding in the back, and you know, what are you going to do? Well, we landed safely. You know, some airplane didn't clear the runway. That's my fifth one that I've had. I've had five aborted landings, and that was my second one at LAX. First one was vehicle on a runway, and this next one, a guy didn't, the plane was still on the runway, didn't clear it or whatever, but it was a little less scary. Now that I've flown a little bit, you know, not a lot, but a little bit, but you're still in the back, and you can't see

what's going on. So that's, that's always nice. All right, so people have been asking me. They've been emailing me. They've been Twittering me. They've been Facebooking me about what's going on with these Irish dates. Dublin, July 31st, Belfast, August 1st in Galway, Galway, Motel, Ireland on the 2nd of August. All right, I have the pre-sale information, but for whatever reason, I'm not allowed to announce it, but I'm going to, I'll tell you when I want to announce it. I'm going to announce it on 6916 at 4pm GMT time, whatever that means, Gaelic, Gaelic Mountain Tatiti two time. All right. Why can't I just say when the fuck this shit's going to be? All right, June 10th is when they're going on sale. I'll announce the pre-sale on the 9th. I'll fuck this. I'm going to

tell you everything now. All right, 6916 at 4pm. The pre-sale will be announced. No, right? Just, this is why I had to rerecord it. This is so fucking confusing. The pre-sale for Dublin, Ireland is going to be June 10th, my birthday, 2016 at 9am Gaelic Mountain Time. All right. And then the regular on sale is going to be June 13th, 9am GMT time, whatever the fuck that means. All right. And Belfast is going to be about five days later. And so is Galway, Galway, Motel, Ireland will be like, that'll be June 15th. So that's the deal. All right. And I'll let you guys know, I'll just, I'll tweet about it. I'll do all that shit so nobody gets fucked out of anything. Also, there's been a second show added in London, England for August 6, 2016. We'll have a link up there

for that and all that shit. All right. There you go. I got all the business stuff out of the way. And also go to allthingscomedy.com. If you're sick of listening to me, we got a bunch of other talented people out there that you can listen to. And with that, let's get into the podcast. Oh, did I travel around? sciatica? It's still acting up. I'm going to every fucking witch doctor out here at this point. I don't give a shit. You know, some woman was talking to me was saying how she got sciatica when she was pregnant. And I was just like, you calling me fat? And she, she laughs. She's like, no, she goes, I just, I just got it. And she went someplace. And she goes, they just kind of lightly just with on my backside. I thought they were really going to need in there. And they just kind

of lightly was like, what the, nobody's fucking putting leaves on my butt cheeks. I'm going to want everybody else first before that. But I got to tell you, like something happens with the air pressure when I'm on a plane, the back of my leg, it feels like my hamstrings going to snap. So I got to keep standing up doing my Vietnamese gambler fucking squat. And I don't know, trying to stretch out the so as muscle, I'm doing everything I can to try to keep this thing at bay. Because I don't fucking have the time to take care of it. I just don't I'm too fucking busy here with writing this filthy, wonderful cartoon, which I'm having a great time doing up up to episode six this week, people up to episode six, writing as far as that aspect of it. I literally signed the fucking

Raymond. All right, let me take it through my trip here. All right. I had some fucking guy. He was like in his early 60s, give me this fucking look like he was going to punch me in the face. To the point I had to say something to him. And I know you guys are thinking like, Bill, what the fuck, you're talking shit to a guy 63. Well, I'm going to be 48 this week. So you know, when I was 15, he was 30. So it's not that bad, but we're pretty close. Right. When I was 10, he was 25, right? You know, you think he wouldn't have picked on me back then? This is what happened, right? So I went down, go around the airport, right? I got bumped up to business. So I get to go first, I get to go into the lounge, right? I get to go in and

fucking pour myself some cornflakes or whatever. So I go into the lounge and there's this fucking guy, right? He just, I don't know. I got on the elevator and he was there. He was kind of in my space, but he was a little oblivious or whatever, right? Fucking horseshoe level bald and he dies the sides, which is always hysterical to me. Like, dude, why are you still dying that? You think that makes you look younger? So anyways, it's like five in the fucking, it's before five in the morning, because that's what time my flight is. And you know, I go up to the lounge and I set my shit down. He goes his other way. I'm not even thinking about this guy. And then I'm walking over to where the cereal is and so is he. All right? Like two planes about to land, you know, on the same runway.

I'm in front of him. I have priority. So I walk over there and then I feel him standing way close, too close to me. And when I finish, you know, I just did a couple of turns, you know, the fucking cereal thing, a couple of turns of the knob and it goes into the bowl and then I pour some milk in it. It probably took me less than 15 seconds to do that. And when I turned around, because I just felt him, I would have turned the other way, but I felt him on my left shoulder, turn and looked at him and he was glaring at me, showing me all of his bottom teeth. You know, he was like, except he wasn't making that noise. But you know, the face you make when you, that's what he was looking at me, just glaring at me.

So what the fuck did I say to him? I just looked on, I was like, I said, I said, are you, I go, you are, are you all right? That's what I said. Are you all right? And then he didn't say anything. And then I felt bad, like, oh man, was, was he like one of those old guys? Remember I did that bit, the old man face? Was that, is that the beginning of the old man face? You start glaring at first and then you gradually get more scared? I have no idea, right? It's like those old people know they're going to hell. They're thinking back on their life and they're trying to think that they have enough time to say enough Hail Marys and they just realized they can't. They're like, they probably saw a ghost

and saw those creepy things coming up from hell. So anyways, he didn't say anything. So I walk away and I'm thinking that feeling bad, like, oh man, I, I, I, you know, I just fucking yelled at that old, I didn't yell at the old guy, but I, I kind of gave him shit, you know? So I felt bad, then went over to sit down and then he gets his fucking cereal. And at this point, you know, I'm like, I'm like fucking 20 yards away from this guy sitting down and he fucking turns around and as he's walking over to his wife, he looks at me and goes, shakes his fucking head up. He was glaring at me. So later I go to get up to get a fucking apple and I knew he was going to be looking at me and I looked right over at him and I can't remember what the fuck I did. And then I was like,

really, Billy, are you really doing this? Neither one of you is going to fight. You're both too fucking old to fight. And that's how my trip started. So I should have known that it was going to be a weird travel experience. I ended up getting into Syracuse. That's where I was going. The first night and we played this minor league hockey arena. And I didn't know at the time until I got there, they actually filmed, that's where they filmed Slap Shot, a lot of it when they did all the stuff, you know, I'm listening to the fucking song when they were on the, the ice and everything. So that was cool as shit. The next night we did another one of those small hockey arenas and that one, they told me that was the place Elvis was supposed to perform at.

But he died the day before. That was his next concert. And so they still have all these Elvis tickets and they actually gave me this little frame thing of a couple of Elvis tickets. And then the date that I played there was really fucking cool. The fuck did I go after that? Oh, then I went down to, oh, I was driving from Portland back to fucking Albany. Who's kidding? Who? I wasn't. Fucking, Verzi was riding, we were in this SUV and I was laying down in the backseat because my fucking leg was killing me. The shit's really starting to scare me, man. Like how fucking long is this going to take? I've been dealing with this shit since February. Every time I start to turn the corner, I got to get on a plane again. So people always stare at me too when I stand up on

the plane. I squat down. I don't even give a fuck. And they're just looking at me. I told you, the last time this guy asked me if I was praying. So anyways, then the final show last night was in Albany. But actually, when we drove from Portland, with so many memories came back, when we went over that bridge, we went over this bridge and we go from New Hampshire to Maine. And I remember I used to fucking, one of my first girlfriends used to live over there, right on the other side of that bridge. Well, she didn't live there. She lived down in the Boston area, but she had like family up there. I remember going up on over that bridge. I always think of that shit. I always think about the ticket that I got on the fucking turnpike up there,

driving my piece of shit truck back, the comedy connection up there, all of that shit. And I got to tell you, man, just living out here in LA, like all people in New York, Vermont, New Hampshire, and Western Mass in Maine, I hope they realize how fucking lucky they are to live where it rains. And there's all that lush land. I'm so fucking jealous of that shit. Like when I came back, when we were driving from Portland to Albany, I actually went down to the Boston area to visit some family and friends and stop off at one of my favorite pizza places. And we ended up coming down Route 1 in the fucking memories that were coming back. There was this strip club up there. There was the Hilltop Steakhouse, which they've now completely knocked down.

I hope that sign, because it's still up that giant fucking cactus. I hope somehow, like that thing is protected. You know what I mean? You know what's funny? That's like one of those dumb things they'll sell on fucking eBay for like a million bucks. And they'll say like 15 people are watching this. You know, like back in the day, how they used to catch people with warrants, they would just have like during like a fight or something, they would just advertise, hey, you're the 20th person to order this, come down here and claim your free gift. And they'd call these people up and they would all go down and claim the gifts. And there'll be all these people standing around down there and then the cops would just walk in and they'd fucking arrest everybody.

They should fucking do that with dumb shit like that on eBay, like the giant, the Hilltop Steakhouse, right? There's 15 people watching it. Those 15 people should immediately be audited. Who the fuck's got a million bucks to blow on a giant lit up cactus? I mean, everybody wants it. Oh, not everybody. I'd love to have that fucking thing. You know, get yourself a spread out in the middle of nowhere. You have a giant lit up cactus. Your friends come over, right? Just make a ride at the giant cactus. You know, you get a nickname out of it. Oh, cactus Chris. He's fucking crazy. But nobody has the money to do that shit, right? Like I went on eBay, right? And I was, I don't know what the fuck I was looking. I was trying to, you know, kill the flight now. Now

you can, you know, go online. So I was just looking up random shit, like, humid doors, even though I've gotten cigars mostly out of my life. I was just looking them up because I think they're fucking cool, right? Well, I know what I was doing. I was looking at cigar affectionato and they had all these, you know, cool places where you can smoke a cigar. They let, you know, in different cities, like places to smoke and shit, right? Like I already found a cool place in London and possibly to smoke, we'll see. And that is if I smoke there. I don't know, we'll figure it out. Anyways, and that just got me thinking about cigar smoking and all that type of shit. So I went on eBay and a lot of the shit that comes along with cigar smoking is pretty fucking cool. A lot of the

lighters, a lot of the ash trays and the humid doors. And I like looking at that stuff, especially if they're vintage or old. So I look up vintage humidor. I'm sure it's still there. And this is fucking, I think it's sitting bull. It's this bust of sitting bull. All right. That's what the fucking humid door is. It's a bust of sitting bull. And what's really fucking, you know, weird is to, to, you know, put your cigars in it, you basically take off the scalp, which I thought was a little fucking tacky, but granted it's old. That was considered like totally fine back in the day. Right. So anyways, this fucking thing is going for a million and a half dollars. And it has it says like there's like 20 people watching. I'm looking

it up right now. eBay.com. All right. Okay, vintage humidor. Boom. All right. What do you got? What do you got? Oh fuck. Where the hell is it? Come on. Oh, there it is. Right there. Sitting bull, cigar store, Indian statue, antique American folk art, vintage tobacco. You know, it's funny from the side. It actually looks cool from straight on. It just looks like, I don't know, it's kind of looking off. It kind of looks sad. Then the, I don't understand why this thing is a million and a half bucks. There's 61 people watching this. 61 people have a million and a half dollars to spend on a fucking humidor. I don't know. Like that's the type of shit right there. Like if I was fucking dodging taxes and all that type of shit, you don't go out and do this on the internet.

Right. I don't know. That's like one of you. You ever watch those meekum car auctions? You know when somebody spends 500 grand on a fucking Mustang? I mean, you're either, you're either evading taxes or you're a wife beater, one or the other. Okay. You're either cheating the fucking system or your wife is scared to death of you that she'll let you fucking do that, blow a million and a half bucks on a humidor. Look at it, honey. Isn't it great? It's sitting bold. Look at the top of his head comes off. Like after a fucking autopsy. Anyways, so I can't remember what the hell I was talking about here. Oh, so we end up having, just having this great, anytime I work with Fersi, we have a great fucking

time. When we were up in Portland after the show, we had a great time working in the, the Elvis venue there and we ended up growing up to this bar afterwards and game three of the Stanley Cup finals and the UFC fights were both on it. Jesus Christ. Dan fucking Anderson. Do you guys see that knockout? That was like some born identity shit. He threw a kick went past the guy and then fucking threw an elbow like he was training in a phone booth. I've never seen anything like that. It reminded me a long time ago. I saw a UFC fighter basically throw a left hook, but he did it with his knee. He fucking got rocked in the head. I think it was that guy that used to call the little bottle, little ball of hate. The hell was his name? One of my favorite fighters

back then, right? He had hair dyed like bright red, fire engine red and he got rocked and he started to go down and the other guy was so excited to jump on him, start hitting him that he kind of just went in with his hands down a little bit and the fucking guy was able to regroup and he just, I can't explain it. He threw it. He need the guy in the head, but he like came from the side. He threw a hook. This fucking guy went down, gave me all right there, Fred, with the left knee. Dan Anderson, the same fucking thing. This guy was just, he was getting punched in the head repeatedly and everybody in the bar was going, oh, right? And I'm yelling and I actually for once, because I don't know shit about fighting. I'm going, he's fucking eating those punches though.

Look at him. And the next, you know, he kicks the guy in the fucking head. He kicked him in the head and then somehow he was like parallel to the guy's head and he gave me all that fucking there with the elbow and the guy just went down. That was it. Over. And then the coolest thing ever was his family was there. You know, tell me you don't have the coolest dad ever. Guy goes shirtless in the ring, eats fucking 12 punches to the head and then knocks the other guy out. You know, it's funny. He was in better shape than his kids. He's a 45 year old guy. He should have the dad bod. He's up there shredded. His kids are coming up, you know, he's making them look soft. Not saying they were soft. I'm just saying usually by the time you're 45, you have three, four kids. You just got that

600 yards stare like you don't give a fuck if you're eating a Twinkie or a fucking tube sock, you know, and this guy's up there just was shredded. So once again, once again, UFC completely worth the fucking money. Be paid to get in. I missed all the other five. Oh, no, I saw the championship one with a guy there that I've been watching ever since he was on the ultimate fighter, the guy from Manchester, England. Fuck, I got to get his name here. God damn it. You know, I realized when he won, I've been saying his last name wrong forever. UFC champ, Manchester. Here we go. What's his name? Michael Bisbing. I wish I was Bisbane. Michael Bisbing, he fucking won. That was another great one.

What a night. And then as we, and as we're watching that simultaneously, they're watching, well, I guess I was probably the only one really watching it, but I was watching the Penguins San Jose and I'm looking at this shit going like, holy fuck, it's two to one. They're carrying the play and all of a sudden they get a high stick. I think it was a four minute power play. They seem like they won the power play for fucking ever. Long story short, they're up two, two to one in the game and it was like, they killed off like all fucking 20 minutes of this penalty. It seemed like a 20 minute penalty, right? They killed this fucking thing off. There's like two seconds left. And all I'm thinking in my head is if they killed off

this penalty, they're going to win this game and they're going to win the cup. This is the fucking series and it's over. Three, two, score out of nowhere. Out of nowhere. I don't know if it was tipped or whatever. After San Jose's goalie made this one of the sickest, he fucking like saved it with like the inside of his forearm, you know, a few minutes earlier than any, let that one go in. A little bit of a floater and now it's two games to one, right? And I don't give a fuck either way. My team's out of it and then my surrogate team is also a lot of it. All I know is that means that there's going to be at least one more game of hockey, right? As far as rather than just going four games, it'll go five, right? So we at least got two more games, which is good for me because

when the NHL and the NBA seasons end, I have like a sort of sports panic attack because I haven't been watching baseball. I don't know what the fuck's going on in baseball, but all I know it's like the middle of the season, you know? Well, here's a rubber game just all outside. You're going to see that slider a lot this afternoon, you know, after you just went from like watching people win championships and playing at that level. That's why the NFL is the shit as far as like, it can actually compete with October baseball because you figure that the middle of the NFL season would be boring. Like most sports, the middle of the season is boring when you're playing like 80 to 162 games, but NFL only plays 16 games. Every game means so fucking much, you know?

Plus, Tom Brady ought to be coming back from his nice rest, a nice rest, relaxed, pissed off Tom Brady coming back to light you up again, you know? You guys can look under the rocks and try to figure out what he's doing. Someday, someday you will admit that he fucking was, you know, he was just the shit. And then the saddest thing obviously the weekend was the death of Muhammad Ali, man. That guy, if you've never watched when we were kings, I used to watch, I used to own that thing and I used to, I wore it out. I had it on a VHS, then I had it on a DVD. I just, I've watched it so many fucking times. I just, I don't even know how to put the guy into words. It was literally like, whenever I watched it,

I was like, I have not done shit with my life. The guy was unbelievable. And when I tweeted, you know, greatest of all time, greatest athlete, ambassador, human being of all time, and all these, you know, Twitter cons, come on, Bill, he just, he hit things in a ring. It's like, no, he didn't. He didn't. He did so much stuff beyond that. Like, you know, this is how great Muhammad Ali was. Like when I said greatest human ever, it said really, they're like better than Gandhi and it's like exactly, exactly. If I said fucking Tom Brady, you know, greatest athlete, you're just going to bring up other quarterbacks. You had to bring up fucking Gandhi. This is a goddamn athlete. That's a good comparison

because he was doing Gandhi shit outside of the ring and he could knock out anybody in the world. The guy could hold court in the poorest of the poor, right up to the White House. When he walked in, he lit up the room. Everybody shut up and you never forgot it. And on top of that, he was one of the greatest fighters of all time, if not the greatest. And I got so much out of when I used to watch that, you know, when he was talking all that shit, it was like, he was almost as much as he was talking shit. He was like, it was like self-help. It's not the way it's done today where today it's just all like, it's all perverted. You know what I mean? It's like, you know what's going to happen if you say the crazy shit, you know that you

hype in the fight, you know that you're going to get a sneaker deal, you know all this money's coming. I'm not saying that he didn't know that on some level, but the shit that that guy went through. If you watch some of those early, especially the ones that are in black and white, the fucking white reporters are so goddamn racist, it's like ridiculous. I remember he's just going and going and going and this reporter is just white guys getting fucking mad. He just hates his confidence. This guy, like if this guy could have got sent into the future, he'd be a hater on Twitter. So he finally just goes, do you ever stop talking? And Ali said something like, no, because I'm knocking out all bums. And if you keep talking, I'm knocking you out too.

And he just, it was the greatest. He just fucking pissed the guy off and he knew what the guy was doing. And he was able to navigate all that. I know everybody says all the terrible shit that he did to Joe Frazier, but nobody gets out of this life without some bad shit. Everybody's done some bad shit, you know what I mean? But I don't know, man, he still had a good run those 74 years. I used to watch him when I was a kid, man. That's how fucking old I am. That's what's freaking me out now is all these people that were like in their 20s and 30s when I was a kid and now dying of fucking old age and shit, David Bowie, Muhammad Ali. That's fucking freaking me out, you know what I mean? Maybe that's why that guy at the little cereal thing and the fucking at the airport was

giving me that look because he knows he's going soon. Everybody he knew is probably all dead, right? And he's thinking, I only got so much time left to get cereal. I was also thinking the fact that he felt so fucking like the complete lack of patience that he had and I don't have patience. The fact that he couldn't wait two seconds for me to get some fucking Cheerios. I was also thinking like that's probably why he's in this lounge. This guy just fucking doesn't take no for an answer. He's a lunatic. I don't know. That's kind of fucking depressing shit that I'll be talking about death because I got to tell you the amount of fucking people that have died in the last goddamn year that I am old enough to have been a teenager and seen them in their fucking prime.

How about that prince shit, huh? Another person lost to the opiates and stuff. I just can't believe it. But the fact that they actually come at him and they come at fame and celebrity and all that type of shit, like regular people are dying because of that drug. How the fuck you say fentanyl or whatever the hell it is? They get it, then the prescription runs out, they're addicted to opiates, and then they get on heroin. And the fact that they don't talk about the pharmaceutical companies at all is because that's like a hundred fifty fucking zillion dollar business and they give money to the politicians and they advertise on TV. So they make prints out to be this famous guy that nobody could say no to. I might be wrong on this, but I know he had at

least one hip replacement, if not two. And if you haven't watched the guy, the guy never took a show off. He was all over the fucking stage. I imagine he was in pain and that's how that shit started was basically him pouring his heart out on stage, giving everybody a hundred percent. He wore out his fucking hips. What's this? James Brown did the same thing. He had to get new hips. Fortunately by the time Prince got the operation, hopefully they were further along. But I imagine he still had all kinds of pain. And then that's my guess. But the fact that people came at him, some people, the way that they came at him was, I don't know, considering the shows and the music that he left us, that was really fucking, it's a little below the belt though,

when you say, I think that's a little below the belt. Have you guys seen this YouTube video? My name is John Daker. You got to watch this thing. I apologize because it's going to be in your fucking head for the rest of time. I'll post the video to my Twitter account. He's singing, he's singing a moray and he can't remember how to sing. I can't stop watching this guy. This guy, I swear to God, I think it's his first TV gig. Somebody was sick. I think they say at the beginning, so this guy fills in and if you look at him, he's literally having an outer body experience. So it's so funny to me because I can relate to this person because the first time I did stand up, I felt like I was watching

myself. I fucked everything up. And this guy, just the way he says his name, it's almost just, he says like, my name is John Daker. It's like, it's like he was out. I think that might be my favorite part of the video is when this fucking guy just, the way he says his own name, he didn't say my name's John Daker. He goes, my name's John Daker. I did it right the first time. I just fucked it up. You gotta hear this. You gotta hear this fucking guy. He says he's singing all these Jesus songs. Hang on, hang on. My name is John Daker. That's the funniest shit ever. My name's John Daker. It's like he's watching his life like he already died. And then he came back and he just got to, like he first time he ever realized my name. My name is

John Daker. That's my fucking name. And this is my life. And I'm on TV and I'm going to sing this song. This is what I did with my life. You look at the guy, fucking poor bastard. Anyways, it's D-A-K-E-R. If you're just listening now and you want to fucking watch it at work. Oh my god, listen to him sing, Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Ah, Dabba for the grace of God. This fucking guy would be the most interesting interview ever. Just like he's one of the most fascinating people I've ever seen. Like what the, what is going on in

between those fucking ears right now? I think if they could, if you could make a show about his fucking thoughts, you know, all these fucking movies. Oh, it's yeah, you know, they show the movie, but it's done in reverse and then they try to fucking flip you out. Nothing. Nothing pink Floyd could ever fucking right, can match what's going on in this guy's head. Highly recommended. All right, let's read, um, let's read some, uh, a little bit of advertising here. Um, bells will ring, ring-a-ting-a-ting, that's a morrrr. Um, what the fuck is the goddamn, my name is John Daker. All right. Oh, me on D's, me on D's, no more sweaty, taint, bloot, bloot, bloot, bloot, me on D's, me on D's, they're so dry, you're gonna faint

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Your baby's going to cry. Don't worry about it. Just go on to stamps.com. Click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and type in Burr. That's stamps.com. Enter Burr. All right. Got it out of the fucking way. Here we go. Let's get back to the podcast. All right. Let's read some of the letters for this week. We're going to leave some of the right before I do though. The Jesus Christ. Poor Jason Lawhead, man. After game one, he's a Cleveland guy. After game one, I can't even say game one. After the first fucking quarter, this guy was sending me texts. He had his head in the oven. I'm like, Jesus Christ, dude, nobody fucking throws in the towel the way you did. I remember back to back years,

I think in 84, the Lakers came out and blew out the Celtics in game one, and we came back and beat them. And then the very next year, we blew them out in game one, one by like 15, 20 fucking points, and then the Lakers won. So I was like, for fuck's sakes, the Bruins went down 0-2 to Vancouver, we ended up winning four of the next five, and we raised, we fucking hoisted up the cup. Stop being such a negative Nelly. And then after the game two, when they lost by like fucking 30 or 35, I wrote back to him, all right, maybe you got a point. Yeah. I never say this after two games, but this series is fucking over. It's over, man. Just go down. If you live in Oakland, just go fucking find a good spot for the championship parade. This is, I don't know,

maybe they go back to Cleveland and then all the positivity from their fans seeps into it. I'm kidding. Here's a question I got you for you guys. I didn't get why Trump got into so much fucking trouble. Well, you know what? I know because he's a dope, but like this stuff that they were saying that he said something racist, right, about the, uh, the judge, Mexican American judge, right, something about the fucking wall. This is what I like to do on a hot button mission like this. I'm just going to wade right in with barely even knowing the facts. It says, Donald Trump's attacks on the judge are racist. He's quite literally saying the judge can't do his job because of his ethnicity. This is the definition of racism. I guess he was doing some

debate going on about that wall that he wants to build and this judge who's Mexican American was going to rule on it. And I think Trump said that he didn't want him to because he was Mexican. He was going to be biased. So everybody said that that was racist. So here's my question as a Joe 12 pack. I'm not Joe six pack, Joe 12 pack. Um, um, basically what he did there as far as I could tell is how they pick juries. Isn't that how they always pick a jury? You know what I mean? Like if you go down for jury duty and the defendant is black as a white dude, I'm not, I'm not going to get picked for this jury or the, the, the defending defendant, uh, attorney doesn't want me on there. Right.

Isn't that how they picked the whole old jets? How they always do it. If it's a domestic violence case, let's try to get as many women there as possible. You know, I think they hide it by going, because I think that they can understand women also now they're hoping to win the fucking case. So what they do is they stack the deck with enough people of the same ilk as the defendant, right? Now, don't they do that? Am I nuts here? I believe that that's what they do. So I thought it was kind of ironic that they, within the court system, that if, if Trump is saying that it's like Trump's picking his jury to try to get the fucking wall and what he wants is he wants a bunch of fucking white people who

like a white guy goes, I'm going to make this country great again. Uh, uh, you, you, you watch how great it's going to be. Like he wants the mouth breathing morons that like him on his jury. That's all he was saying as far as I could tell, right? Not saying the guy's not racist, but I thought that that one, they were stretching the bounds a little bit. Now I'm just asking a fucking question here before you fucking edit this thing and make me look like the next Hitler. But I was watching that story. I was just going like, yeah, that's kind of how courts work. That's kind of exactly how it works. And not to mention when the OJ verdict came in, white people like what the fuck

and black people were freaking out, having a parade. That's why they do it, right? Everybody watches it and you put yourself in the position of whoever's there. I watched the OJ trial. I'm fucking, I got my throat slashed, right? Black people watch it and they go, yeah, I got off. That's how I look at it. I don't know. And I don't think that's wrong either. It's like watching sports except it's people's freedom. All right, Scandinavia. Hey, Billy Burball's. Is it true that you're not going to come to Scandinavia? Me and my lady are huge fans and was really hoping for you to come to Sweden this summer slash fall. I just need to know if I need to book some plane tickets to the Netherlands,

then this is going to cost me like one grand for us to see your shit. But I'll bet it's worth it. But I just need to know if you're planning to come to Scandinavia some point in the future. Otherwise, love your shit and looking forward to Ephes for family season two. Well, thank you very much. Ephes for family season two is the reason why on this trip I'm not going to Scandinavia. So like there's like three chunks. Okay, there's the my pasty people, which is coming in first, you know, just like the jury. Does this mean I'm a racist the way I'm touring against other white people? No, it's just how it worked out. And then I probably do the Scandinavian thing next and then hopefully Eastern Europe. That's what I am

hoping to do. The show takes up way more time than I thought it would. But like they I had a list of 29 cities that wanted to bring me over there. And I could have gone on a month long fucking crazy ass tour. I've broken it up into two. But I think the way my workload is now I have to break it into three. But like, I am absolutely coming back there again. It's a beautiful country. I love it. You know, who the fuck doesn't want to go that I've been in like two or three times. And I'll definitely come back. I just don't know when I can't promise you as to when but I am definitely going to come back. And I don't know. Other than that, I don't have any more information. So save your money, dude, don't blow a grand. Don't blow a grand coming to see me with my

shit and dick jokes. I'll come your way. All right, don't worry about it. Okay, X-Men billboard. Hey, Billiam, this is fucking nerd shit. Nerd shit. So please bear with me. There's a new X-Man movie and Rose McGowan, the chick who used to date Marilyn Manson has her tits in an uproar over this billboard because between mystique, a woman and apocalypse a dude. If you don't want to click on the link from some weirdo, you don't don't know no problem. Just a picture, just picture a blue dude holding up a naked blue woman by the throat to the point her feet aren't on the ground. Context, apocalypse, the dude is a badass villain in the movie and mystique, the woman is the leading lady and badass heroin in the movie. Here's the problem. Rose McGowan says this is promoting

violence against women, which I feel is horseshit. Here's why. If it was Hugh Jackman slash Wolverine being choked out and held up, no problem. The point of the post is to show how dangerous slash how much of the threat the villain, how much of a threat the villain is. It's not a political statement. Here's my issue with this though. How does a studio slash movie maker win? Suppose Wolverine was the leading hero. Women would be complaining that it's always a man as the hero and women are more like backup or support roles. I mean, mystique is badass. She's leading the fight against this guy. To me, that's empowering to women. She isn't a sex symbol in the movie, though Jennifer Lawrence who plays her is really attractive. She's just strong and a leader.

All I can think is that they wanted her standing. All I can think is that they want her standing on the neck of the villain, but this, but that's fucking stupid for promotional posters. You couldn't have her be the villain and holding up a man hero because that would be some kind of anti-woman. All women are evil campaign instead. That way you lost me here. You couldn't have her be the villain and holding up a man hero. Oh, I see. If the female character was evil and then was holding up the guy character, they couldn't do that because then they would be saying, be considered anti-women. All women are evil. I guess what bothers me is that it just seems like there's no way to please any non-white male lately. Women wanted a strong female hero. They got one, but she's in

danger of the villain, a man. Somehow that equals violence on women when it's really just about violence in general or war or conflict or whatever. I mean, the dude isn't slapping her for overcooking his steak. He's trying to conquer the world. She's trying to stop him and he's choking her ass. How is that a gender issue? All right. Let me see. Let me see if I can find the picture this year. I did look at it. Library. No, that's not the, I always click on the wrong one. Yeah, I actually, you know, when I heard it, I thought it was bullshit. But then I saw the poster, the movie, the clip that I saw, I don't see your feet dangling off of it. I see why they did that. I understand why that they did it that way. What happens is when you're right, what I'm learning

is when you're writing something, you're so fucking focused on is the story tracking from point A to point B to point C and we land this thing without crashing into the fucking ocean. That they wouldn't think that anybody, you know, might have a problem with that. I understand. I understand. This is actually one of those ones I get why they don't want to see that. But in defensive view, if, how about this? If the guy character, the fucking Apollo guy, whatever his fucking name is, was Apocalypse, such dumb names, Apocalypse Mystique. These all sound like bad cologne. Anyways, if Apocalypse was holding the Wolverine Hugh Jackman by the throat, now would that be

promoting male on male violence? Would there be more bar room brawls because of that? I honestly don't think it promotes violence. I think like the level stupid that you'd have to be to look at Apocalypse holding up, holding a woman by her throat and to say like, oh, I guess it's okay to hit women. Now I'm going to start hitting women. If you were that fucking stupid, by the time you got to, unless she was riding in the car, let's see you're driving home and now you're going to fucking choke her because you saw this Apocalypse guy choking fucking Mystique, right? You'd also see another thousand signs on the way home and next thing you know, I don't know, you'd be in a car dealership buying something or getting a

fucking McDonald's sandwich. I think you would forget if you were that like, if your brain was like that influenced. But having said that, looking at the poster, I understand why they were just like, you know, that's not the greatest image. You could have another image up there. Yeah, I don't have a problem with them changing it, but I definitely understand your points on that thing. But you know, I don't fucking know. It's just the time that we're living it. Everybody gets offended. Everybody doesn't get offended. A small group of people gets offended and the news covers it, you know, because what are they going to talk about to fucking how the drug companies in a roundabout way kill Prince? You know, I mean, what are they

going to talk about? They're going to talk about fracking and people then fucking up the water supply. There's too much money involved in that. Okay. But you know, if you got a group of fucking soccer moms upset about a fucking blue woman getting held up by a guy who appears to be made out of stone, um, in a movie, you know, that's going to make it. That's going to make it. You do a Caitlyn Jenner joke in a fucking strip mall. Yeah, that's going to get on the fucking news, but real shit that matters. No, that's not going to happen. You know, that's not going to fall. Why would you do that? That's just another one of those back burner stories that they just stick on the front burner all the fucking time. Like they, I mean, I'm not saying like,

you know, violence against women isn't a major issue, but I'm just saying like people aren't as simplistic as that. Like they don't fucking look at something and like, um, I don't know, as a kid, like the amount of violence that I watched when I was growing up, you know what I mean? All the fucking shows that I've watched, I've yet to chase somebody down an alley, pull them off a fence, chain link fence, beat them up or even slide over the hood of a car. I saw all those images when I was growing up. I used to pretend and play war and all that shit. I never fucking killed anybody. I've never hit a woman. I never did any of that. I think what, you know what it is, is what really makes you do shit like that is, is horrific fucking

parents. I think that that's what it is. And now they're trying to blame the signs, the sign that's going to be up for all of fucking two weeks when this movie's out, as opposed to your dad and mom and their relationship that you grow up for the first 18 or years of your life fucking watching. But, you know, you can't blame those people because those people buy things on the channel. You know what I mean? So you always give them a pass and then you rub their balls and you call them Joe Sixback and fucking the true heroes. You know, they're always rubbing their balls like they give a fuck about them. They don't. They just want their money. You know what I mean? That's why corporations act like all of these non-crisis are absolute crisis, crisis disease,

because they don't want to lose a fucking dime. So if anybody bitches, anybody moans, anybody complains, they fucking cave in. And then a lot of these groups are aware of that. And when they get to get a corporation to cave, it gives them like it, it's almost like a video game. It gives them more life and they're taken more seriously. So it's a giant, it's a giant fucking game. You know, at the end of the day, it's two people that don't fucking exist. But I don't know, there's something, there's a look on her face. She doesn't look badass there. It makes me feel bad for her and I want to help her. So maybe what they should have done, she should have had a more fucking Rhonda Rousey look on her face and maybe was pulling

backs on his fucking, are those cornrows? What the fuck does he have? Was that wavy hair? I can't, I don't know what this guy's made out of. His fucking claymation hair. She should have, she should be like, you know, maybe gouging his eyes a little bit. I don't know. I was kidding, they'd still fucking complain. If you really want to get them going, just have that picture right there, that image. No, I'm not going to tell you to do that because there's no sense of humor anymore. I was going to, I was going to say that maybe you could take that image and say like, no, don't, Bill, don't, it's, it's, don't ask me at a show. I'll tell you what I was going to say. All right. Hey, Billy Dope,

Billy the fucking dope. Can, can women forget Mr. Nice Guy Persona? Hey, I'm really having a difficult reading today. All right. Big fan from Lithuania. That's another one on the list that I got to get to. You're a great comedian. It would be great if you ever decided to do, you stand up here in the Baltics. That will happen at some point in my career, hopefully sooner rather than later. All right. The guy says, I got at this dilemma. Can a woman forget your past as a nice guy? One of my former classmates is coming back to my hometown on summer vacation for a few weeks. And let's say I'd like to get intimate with her while she's here. Now the thing is, when we were still in school, I had a mad crush on this girl for years.

However, shit didn't work out because I didn't know how the life works, how the females work. And also I was a little bitch, Mr. Nice Guy. I beat my younger self if that was possible. All right. You're doing some good therapy here. But for over the years, but over the years that I've spent in our capital city, I can safely say that my view and attitude towards females and masculinity has changed significantly. What do you think? Can a woman brush off the image of a nice guy or are you forever marked with the certain character traits in her eyes? Yeah, I think you're kind of fucked. Just put it this way. Take the actor that played like Urkel or something like that. It's like you typecast. And Urkel could literally become an army

fucking ranger and then leave the military. And when he went to go do a fucking action movie, they'd be, ah, fucking Urkel, give me a fucking break, right? It's just the problem is what you got to do. Look, you always got to take, you always got to take it bad. What you're going to have to do when you get up there is you're going to have to crowd the plate. No kid, which I would just be, you're going to have to be significantly different to raise any sort of intrigue in her. You know what I mean? Because she probably just wants to meet up with your, you know, have a couple of siters or whatever that, whatever those drinks women have when they know that they're not going to fuck you, you know, one of those fucking, I want to feel warm,

you know, they have that stupid sweater that covers their hands too and they drink it with both hands out of a mug, you know, and it's just fucking over, right? They're like, you know, hitting more on the waiter than the, you know, I mean, listening to you, you're going to have to lie. I don't know. I don't know what you got to do. Go buy yourself a Raiders of the Lost Ark leather jacket. You got to try to come in and act like you've been fucking doing. So this is the thing, this is what's going to fuck you is you want this woman too bad. All right. You got to not give a fuck. Don't be, don't be a dick, but just go in there and just, Hey, what's going on? What are you been up to? You know, and then talk up some of the shit you're doing. You know, I don't know,

look at your phone out. It's broad. She's driving me crazy. I got the ladies all over me. I don't know. I don't know. Dude, I don't know what to tell you on this one. Once you're typecast, it's fucking over, dude. You got to go behind the camera here. You got to start directing or some shit because I don't know what to tell you. You're, um, this is what I would do. Just know this going into it. You're fucked. All right. So there's no pressure. Who gives a shit? And, uh, I don't know, make her laugh and just tell you know, I always had a crush on you, but I used to be a bitch, but I'm not a bitch anymore. So what do you say? What do you say? You come over here and, uh, jump on my fucking off. You can't go that way. But yeah, I would, um,

man, man, that's a tough one. That's a tough one. I, you know, maybe that's it. Just trash your former self. Yeah, he's be a, he's be a bitch. You know, I don't know how to do it, dude. You know what? You stump me somewhere in there. I think, I think the whole not giving a fuck and then trashing your former self and then just telling her that you had a crush on her. Who knows, dude? Maybe, uh, I don't know. There's a chance maybe she likes you back then or I don't know. Women got that thing though, dude. Once you're the fucking friend, it's, you're, you're, you're, it's over, dude. It's over. You're, you're fucking, um, oh, the lovely Nia. Nia, you know, we need you. Me and this guy from Lithuania. I'll tell you really quickly, grab, grab one of those cords.

All right, Jesus. All right. As you're plugging in, I'll tell you, this guy basically in Lithuania, he, uh, he used to be a bitch when it used to be Mr. Nice guy. So he didn't get any of the, any of the nice, nice as Tracy Morgan would say, right? So he, um, whatever, he had a crush on this chick and she got put in the friend zone. As Chris Rock would say, I'm just going to quote every black comedian here. And, um, you plugged in, there we go. And you're putting the windscreen on and it's really loud and annoying to the listeners. There we go. The lovely Nia, everybody. Hi. Yeah. So basically he had a crush on this girl. He was a nice guy. He got put in the friend zone and now she's coming back to town. He's now lived in the

city. He understands the male female dynamic better. Okay. And, um, the way he's wording this, he's been, uh, doing all right for himself, but he still wants to bang this woman. He's, his question is once you're in the friend zone like that, is it possible to get out of it? Absolutely. It is. Oh, wow. Okay. Cause I was going like, I don't know. I was saying to you like typecast, you're like Urkel and now you want to be the star of an action movie. You know, but yeah, no, I think you can, but it's all, it's all predicated on your behavior. Like you don't want to all of a sudden start acting like an aloof jerk or anything like that. So I told them to buy a Raiders of the Lost Ark waist length leather jacket,

maybe get a hat and a whip. Uh, yeah. Is that bad? Uh, I just think maybe you're a little less available, perhaps, you know, you know, it can be a thing where she'll come to town and be like, Oh my God, okay, let's go here and I want to do this. And then, you know, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely. We'll let me know when you're around. Yeah, maybe we can grab a drink or something. Keep a cash and, um, don't go in there like, so I've been fucking a lot abroad since you left. Not like that. But just as she's talking about her life, you talk about your life. Yeah, I've been seeing some girls here and then I know nothing too serious, but I've been having my fun. But anyway, what's going on with you? You look good. Like that, like Nia bam. That was good.

Oh, were you, were you, were you enjoying that just then? No, I, I'm enjoying the, the, the advice. Yeah. That was good. Thank you. That was, I was stammering. I was like, uh, you may not have to just fuck. And I said, your best thing you got going is, you know, you got no shot. So just don't give a fuck and just go in there and just be like, I think that's also true too. You have to not give, you can't go into it with expectations of anything. Yeah, you can fuck or you don't, I think you just be normal, be a friend like you have been. But I think I have a friend who often gets friends on it. And I'm always telling him that he needs to make himself less available because he always makes himself available. What does that do psychologically

to women when you're less available? Because I have my theory and I know it'll be considered sexist. So I'll listen to you. I think it's the same with men and women. If you're less available, like the people want you more, I think that's just how life is. People like the hunt. I think men like the hunt a little more. So I think you should be. I never liked the hunt. Really? If someone was like a pain, I'd be like, oh, hey, you're not a hunter. You're more of a gatherer. No, I was just more like, I just, I hate it when women played hard to get. It was so, it just, it got so boring, so fucking fast. I was just like, I can fucking, I'll just go rub one out. And then I'll go watch a game. And then, you know, something that I, it's,

you're not worth the fucking trouble, right? You know what I mean? I just always found that like, because I remember when I would just start to walk away and then these girls would be like, no, you're supposed to blah, blah, blah, blah. I was like, I didn't, I didn't get the script. Am I in like some fucking awful play right now? Right. I walked away from a lot, but my number could have been so much higher. I should have chased. I didn't chase. I just tapped out. I'd be like, oh, yeah, you know, if you don't want to, I understand, you know, I wouldn't fuck me either. Oh, all right. Oh, no, don't say that about yourself. People like you. All right. Hey, Bill Dill Pickle.

Um, I love a good sandwich. My question to you is if you were a sandwich, what type of sandwich would you be? I think you already answered this one. If you could eat only one sandwich for the rest of your life, what would you be? All right, Nia, remind the listeners what kind of sandwich you think I am. I once compared you to a grilled cheese sandwich, but the thing about it is that you were about as exotic as a grilled cheese sandwich. I was talking about that if, if I ever went to prison, the fact that I was a redhead on for the first time in my life, I might be considered exotic. Yeah. I thought you were grossly overestimating. I was joking

about the fact that quickly I would be sexually assaulted in there and you had to remind me that I'm a plain Jane. There wasn't even tomatoes on that fucking grilled cheese sandwich. You think with the hair, I would have got something. Fuck. All right. So what sandwich would you like to eat for the rest of you? I know the sandwich that I could. This sound like this question came out of Cosmo. If you were a sandwich, what kind of sandwich would you be? If you could only eat one sandwich for the rest of your life, what would it be? No, we would never ask each other what kind of sandwich we'd want to be. We'd be like, what kind of dress are you? A classic little black dress?

A cocktail dress or a gown for the Oscars like that? Well, what about for the bigger girls? What about for the bigger girls? What about the bigger girls? Are you a car cover with spaghetti straps? Stop. Stop. I didn't like how they're just feeding your fucking egos like you're all these, you know what? I get what they're doing. They're trying to sell magazines. Anyway, what kind of sandwich would you be? Velvita. If I was a pair of pants, I'd be clam diggers. This, I saw like four or five guys wearing those fucking things. Oh, this weekend? Yeah. Like those guys who have the Hitler youth haircuts and then they just walk

around with their calves up to the fucking airport. It's just the funniest thing ever. I don't know why it's not so simple to just point at their legs and start laughing. It's just me. All right. I love a good sandwich too. Okay. Oh, and I'd be, I don't know, my freckles and all that. I'd probably be a lobster roll. Lobster. Yeah, a crab roll. No, you're looking all white with red blotches. And a day old bun. That'd be my sciatic nerve problem. I'm a mess. It's true. Like there are certain white people, they definitely take on the hue of a boiled lobster when they had too much sun. And that would be me. If you would be a turkey sandwich,

because you like turkey sandwiches. Yeah, but that's not me. You're not. No, turkey sandwich, you know, people get excited and happy when turkey comes around. You know what I mean? I think you're a turkey sandwich because you're like, but you don't ever say that again. I think you're a turkey. This is you're reliable. You're satisfied. And when I talk, I make you go to sleep. When consumed, I make you sleepy. All right. If you could only eat one sandwich, Nia, for the rest of your life, what would it be? This feels like a lifetime movie. Is a Philly cheese day considered a sandwich? Because you know, that's my all time favorite of all time. Well, I mean, it's not considered breakfast.

No, it's considered a cereal. All right. So yeah, a Philly cheese stick. Yeah, a hero is a sandwich, right? Or whatever the fuck they call it. Yeah, a hero sandwich. So yeah. If I could eat one sandwich for the rest of my life, I'd eat a peanut butter sandwich with butter. PBB and J. Yeah, that's what I would have with a glass of fucking milk. Wait, you'd have jelly on it though, wouldn't you? No, I don't want to get fat. You put jelly on your peanut butter sandwich. If I could have one once, well, just one for the rest of my fucking life. Well, I don't have to eat it every day. Well, no, not every day, but the only sandwich. When you're in the mood for a sandwich,

you can only eat this particular sandwich. I don't know. An Italian sub? You like Italian sandwiches? Nah, then they put the oil all over and it feels like the bread's sweaty. You don't always have to get the oil. I don't know what I'd have. I don't, I don't know what I would fucking have. It's just too much. You know what? I guess if I wouldn't die of a heart attack, I'd have a roast beef sandwich. There you go. There you go, Bill. You're exciting. All right. Lady likes the belly. Billy, you bastard. Love the podcast. That's just funny. You bastard. Love the podcast, mate.

Have been following your shenanigans for nearly eight years. Hustle for tickets when you get here to London. I got my birthday on the 3rd of August and will be cruising through to your gig on the 5th. Caught you a couple years ago and gave you a cigar after the show at the roundhouse in Camden. Who knows? Maybe you smoked it. Of course I did. Okay, so help me with this kind of weird dilemma of mine. Here's the deal. I'm 6'2", 6'3", and a good day. He's feeling good about himself. He stands up straight and I'm fairly trim. However, due to my love of cake, pie, and all things doughnut, I've packed on a mass in one specific area, my belly. Oh God, that's the classic European fucking body. They got those 7th grader arms and then they just

got the fucking fish and chips belly. I feel like they're generally a thinner people, but they like their pubs and they like their food. Yeah, they're thinner because I think their food is higher quality, but they just don't go to the gym over there. They walk around a lot though. All right. My brother loves it. They've nicknamed me Big Belly Bigsby. Call back to Chappelle's Clayton Bigsby and I've become used to giving it a good old-fashioned slap from time to time. My lady loves it too. She rubs it, wants to fill up with her rabbit food. She's vegan, whatever, et cetera, et cetera. It's a mind fuck. Subverts, the whole guy's got to have a pack vibe. You're losing me here. Anyways, I'm going to keep on going

Michelangelo on this bitch and getting into shape at the risk of losing the fail-safe laughter of the day. What do you think? Yeah, dude, you don't want to be the fat guy who slaps his belly like a fucking walrus looking for a mate. And if you don't get it under control, it's going to get bigger and bigger and it's going to be bad for your health. So trust me, your girlfriend might love the belly right now, but she's going to really love that six-pack. Really? What if she's insecure? She's worried that he's going to go out and fucking start doing the full Monty someplace. They can both work and get the six-pack together, although she might already have it since she's a vegan. You know that never happens. And to keep what? Couples can never work out. I don't like,

yeah, I'm not into it, but... Remember when we tried to work out? And I was just yelling, you know, when you push it out, you've got to want it. Remember that? No, we never worked out together like that. We would go to the gym together and we would do your thing. That's what we always do. We go do a party. What do we do? We go in different directions. I came here to have a good time. Not to be. Not to be with the person I live with. I came here to... I live with you. I don't need to hang out with you at this party. Yeah, so what's going on with you in this new environment? All right. Yeah, no, your girlfriend's going to love the six-pack, so keep at it. And like, to keep a belly just so people can slap it around so you can be that guy at the party after a while,

yeah, that's pathetic. It's better to get shredded and be, you know, real Michelangelo. Yeah, and then you get to walk around being a dick, being aloof, you know? Just every time people talk to you, you pretend you're looking at something down the street with your fucking eyebrows up. Sorry, man, it's got to keep on moving, you know? I'm like a shark. Did you talk about that poster? Yeah. No, I missed it. Yeah, the guy actually brought up a bunch of great points. Which is... Well, I don't know if you want to go back and read it. I can't... I don't remember. He was just saying like... Well, no, if he was like... Here's one that I made. If he was holding up Hugh Jackman, would that increase the chances of guys fighting other guys?

I don't think it's about like increasing, like, influencing people to do it. It's just like... It's just not a good look. Well, they said it... It isn't a great look. I actually... I don't think that it's a good poster. But I would say that I don't think it promotes violence against women. I don't... I wouldn't think so either, but... Although I'm not trying to speak for blue women, though. That's right. They can speak for themselves. No, I don't know. I saw that poster and I first of all couldn't tell it was a woman. But if I was like well versed in that whole thing, I would be like, oh, that's such and such character. Yeah, I don't know. But I think it's probably best that they have a different poster. I was saying they're all named after like discontinued

colognes. Like what? Mystique apocalypse. It just sounds like... It's like whoever came up with Zima, then tried to get into cologne and it all fucking bombed. Right? Listen, I unfortunately got to stop the podcast because I got to go to work. All right, thank you guys for listening and I'll let you guys know about those pre-sales for the upcoming dates in Ireland. And thank you to everybody that's been buying tickets in Scotland, in Amsterdam, in London, and a second show in London, Nene. That's so great. Yeah, and I found a cigar bar where I can fucking smoke a stick after. I love that town. Yeah. Nice big picture of fucking, I don't know, Winston Churchill or some shit would be wonderful. Right? But on the land, we have identity. We will never say that now.

Is that Winston Churchill? That's Iron Maiden. All right. With Winston Churchill in front. I think Ace is high, I believe that was. All right, go fuck yourselves. I'll check in on you on Thursday. As a spaghetti bolognese, with a lot of meat. Download the Maiden lesson app and cook me. Yeah, top the lesson. Me with a cleaver.