Monday Morning Podcast - Monday Morning Podcast 8-16-21
Episode Date: August 16, 2021Bill rambles about parenting with tablets, the French marathon runner, and Wendy's....
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Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr, and it's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday
August 17th, no August 16th today's Monday. What's going on?
Sorry, I'm up in the fucking attic of this house
You know
I'm still on vacation here
Enjoying myself. I apologize for the echo. There's nothing I could fucking do about it
But even if there wasn't an echo wouldn't it wouldn't you complain about something else? You know, wouldn't you be like, oh, you know
Good podcast, but what was up with the treble?
All right, first of all
You know
Anyway, what the fuck do you want from me? All right, I'm not somebody that has a crew
I don't have a posse. I don't have an ensembla
Or an entourage. I fucking do this shit wherever I could do it. So sometimes it sounds good. Sometimes it doesn't
Oh man, you know what I fucking saw today really just annoyed the fucking shit out of me. Oh
My god, it just fucking bugged the shit out of me
It bugged the shit out of me. Oh did it bug the fucking shit out of me some stupid fucking post
You know where mothers are complaining once again about how they have no fucking help. Jesus fucking Christ
Yeah, they're right. They're unbelievable. It's just any way any kid and then they have a kid. They're like, I didn't know it was work
I'm so tired
You just all fucking slapping each other on the goddamn back about how hard they work and all of this fucking shit
You go find that fucking post out there about fathers
You know, I want to see that fucking goddamn. I don't know. And if you find it, I'm gonna shit on them, too
bunch of fucking babies sitting in a
Fucking apartment on a house with a flat-screen TV. You got tablets
You got more goddamn shit to distract your fucking kid with nowadays and this they're fucking complaining more than ever
Do we listen to the mother's enough?
If
They're an open dialogue
You know, this is what you know the genius of people that do shit like that is they never really make a statement
All they do is just lead these fucking
Mouth breathers to it by asking questions. You know, did that song go a little too far?
They just put that idea in some dope's head. They go, you know what I think it did it went too far for me
I was raised Methodist or whatever. They're fucking
dumbass complaint is
Sorry, I just woke up to that. I
Just read that and you know, it's one of those things where you want to chime in
You want to say something but at the end of the day like most things
It's like what's what's the upside?
Where's the upside of this if I actually fucking chime in here? There's no fucking upside
All right, just let them fucking complain
It has to be really difficult
Must be fucking
One of the hardest things in the world, you know
You might want to watch the world news every once in a while
I think you'd feel a little bit better about you know feeding your kid fruit loops
You know, I gotta tell you being an actor in a movie is one of the most difficult things ever
I mean you show up and you have these things to say that somebody else already wrote
So really all you have to do is just stop on a piece of tape and then just say what somebody else wrote, you know
It maybe put a pause in there
So it sounds interesting and it makes it look like you're actually thinking you have no idea how mentally taxing that is
We as actors
Bravity of the way we put our instrument out there to be judged
to be criticized and
I'm sorry. I don't know a third word for that same thing who gives a fuck
Let's talk about the ocean everybody Paul Versey the whole week has been trying to get me to go swimming in the fucking ocean
So he does the usual thing about like, you know, you actually have a greater chance of being struck by lightning than you do of
Getting eaten by a shark enjoy the water
All right, first of all, who wants to be struck by lightning both of those things are horrible things
You know, that's like, you know, you have just as great a chance of getting unwinningly
Fucked in the ass as you do is being lit on fire at a firework show and it's I know that stat isn't true
But I'm just saying both of those things are horrible
All right, if I
Really should have thought this through more, but I'm not too far now and I'm not hitting a race
Yeah, that whole bullshit you have a greater chance of getting struck by lightning
Then get eaten by a shark is fucking bullshit when it comes to me
It isn't because I'm never gonna get struck by lightning because when it's thundering out I go inside
Okay, when I step into the ocean I have now walked into the room where all the sharks that ain't it sea world
Or some fucking aquarium are at so don't give me that bullshit
I have zero percent chance of being struck by lightning. I don't go outside where there's lightning
Walking into the ocean
Where the sharks are is the same thing as what was lightning out if I put a fucking
I don't know some sort of metal hat on it just walked out there
So go fuck yourselves with that not to mention I go out. I don't go in the ocean. I frolic I frolic along the beach
That's where I go
You know
That's where I go takes you back to the the old joke
I used to do in my aqua people like you know 90% of shark attacks actually happen in shallow water and these fucking idiots
Think you're safer if you're in deep water. It's like dumb dumb. That's where the people are. It's called the beach
90% of people that are in the ocean are at the fucking beach
Okay, and then you got the people that like to scuba dive and swim into caves and get certified
You know and break records holding their breath and doing all of that crazies that that's a whole other that's a whole other human
All right, those people who watched Aquaman too many times and now they want to go live it
Talking to fish
Tuna swordfish
Yeah, so I go into the fucking ocean
Frolicking with my kids, you know having a good time skipping around
Zinc oxide on my cute little button nose, right and
All of a sudden I feel something nibbling at my foot and I look down. It's like this little fucking crab like the size of my thumb
Coming up like hey, this is my territory so I get my little kick, you know
What's you know, I put on a show I make sure the sand at the bottom comes up
You know what this guy this fucking thing jumped up in the air
Like Jordan and just had its claws out. No, it's like Ralph Machio
And your karate kid it just fucking went up in the air like let's do this and I'm just looking at this little shit
Like I could just crush you and even you want to fight
You know why that that you know why that crab is like that because it knows where it is
Okay, it's in the fucking ocean
The thing about the ocean what I love about the ocean that lulls all these fucking
These these goddamn
Sea lion looking people with their rolls of fucking jelly coming down the fucking beach
What I love about these people is these same people wouldn't you know, would you walk into the jungle?
barefoot wearing a pair of shorts
If there were bears tigers lions, whatever the fuck you were at, right, I guess a bear lives in the forest. I
Don't know is that like the suburbs of the jungle?
I live in the forest. I just got sick of the jungle too much murder, you know too much crime
Just came out here where the air is a little fresher
less hunters
Yeah, that's what you do when you go into the ocean you're basically walking into a jungle that's underwater
That has a bunch of shit in there that could fucking kill you including the water
When you walk into the jungle could can the air kill you?
Does the air all of a sudden start moving in a direction that drags you along and you've got to be like, okay?
I can't breathe right now. Maybe I'll just need to like sort of swim walk parallel to this until I could fucking breathe again
Yeah, so I know you guys enjoy the beach. I'm not saying don't enjoy the beach
I'm just saying stop coming at me with your dumb ass fucking stats
All right, I know what I'm dealing with here
Jacques Cousteau's kid
Got killed by a shark
Who knew more about the ocean than Jacques Cousteau nobody so I'm not listening to you and you stupid
I googled chances of hey theory chances of shark attack and then you're gonna come at me
Hey, hey Bill enjoy the ocean. That's what verse. He says to me enjoy the ocean as if he just debunked all of my fears
All of a sudden he's an oceanographer because he talked to the fucking broad in his phone
whatever
Haven't said that my my daughter wanted to go in the ocean
So I put the floaties on and I finally said fuck it and I went out there and you know, I
Had I enjoyed myself, you know, if you're into swimming and dirty water, I don't understand what the problem is
Well, like we got pools
You could see all the way to the bottom
The only chemical in the pool is to help make the water cleaner as opposed to whatever the fuck DuPont put in the
Water or the raw sewage that people haven't realized just around the corner that somebody's dumping in there
All right, Bill we get it. You don't like the ocean. I do like the ocean. I also like the jungle. I know I'm not a part of it
Actually, is that really true I
Guess if you go back to caveman days, I am part of the jungle in the forest
Wow, I just figured it out
I'm a spineless caveman
I'm a caveman that wouldn't have made it back in the day
Also, I gotta tell you I'm into those fucking kayaks
You know just kind of going around but you got to make sure you get a bigger one
You get one of the small ones. You don't realize it's just for a kid. You just sink down to the bottom
but
I've been watching people cruising around
Just off the coast. I mean that looks better to me
Be above the water. Some shark comes over it bites, you know
Do you know you have a greater chance of being struck by lightning and a kayak than you do have getting bit by a shark
I would disagree because kayaks made out of plastic
All right, so's the helmet
All right, what and then the fucking ore is made out of plastic they handles made out of wood
I'm doing all the things I need to do to avoid lightning
500 people a year get eaten by show whatever the fuck they said
All right, what else can I talk about here? What else can I babble about babble on about in
This fucking goddamn attic up here. Did you guys watch that MotoGP race?
Out there in Austria
Homeland of Arnold Schwarzenegger
That's how
All I think every time I listen to MotoGP when it gets exciting is that spam spam spam from fucking Monty Python
What a fucking crazy race?
Absolutely crazy race
Francisco, but yeah
Is that how you say his name was leading the race also was leading in points and they're flying around the track and
The whole time they're worried that it's gonna start raining
All right, and for the most part it's Fabio Quartararo this guy Francisco, but yeah, let me not say his fucking name, right and
Mach
Makas and
They're going back and forth. I lost count how many times these guys passed each other
All right, which is why I like MotoGP the best and then all of a sudden it starts fucking raining out these guys are out there on slicks
Doing like fucking, you know anywhere from 150 to 200 miles an hour
And then going into turns when they slow down to about I don't know like, you know 70
So
There's like five laps to go and all of a sudden it just starts pouring raining and now they have to slow down
To like I don't even know what they would do it. I mean, I think they would they were like I
Don't know what's slowing down in MotoGP is I think on a straightaway. They were they were only going like 80 miles an hour
And it's pouring rain out with slicks on and they're racing with each other and
Finally with three laps to go
I
Don't know what they help somebody put their hand up. They all put their hand up like fuck it all the leaders
We're gonna go in and we're gonna switch bikes
And get on a bike that has tires that can deal with the rain, right?
And so basically everybody went and everybody followed the leaders because they were going in fuck it will do it too
There's only three laps laps left. So
and
Valentino Rossi and a couple other guys decided to stay out there
So the leaders of the race
Go into the pits jump off their bikes
To get on the bike that actually has tires for the rain that's out there as Brad Bender and
And Valentino Rossi these guys they keep racing and they keep going around and they build up like a fucking
Three-quarter of a lap lead with now two and a quarter laps to go
then Marquez
Fabio and fucking Fernando get on their bikes. Yeah, Joanne Meir. I think too. Yo ha and however you say his name
They jump on their bikes now
They start
Riding like fucking nine zillion miles an hour trying to catch these these fucking guys on their slicks and at one point
They're literally going around
They're going around the turds like fucking curly they
You know going like
30 miles an hour and these guys are just barreling down the fucking track trying to catch them and
The announcers just losing his mind, you know, and it's like
And Brad Bender ended up winning the fucking race
When in the race and I think he crossed the finish line a motor scooter could have could have passed it, but uh, I
Really thought it was a crazy strategy
With three laps left. I think the assumption was that everyone was going to go in
but
go to on Brad Bender for winning the race and
Having the balls to stay out there
I'm really exciting race and I'm telling you F1 people. I know F1's great this year
I'm not saying don't watch F1 because I've been watching a little bit of it this year. It's been very exciting
But like, you know motor GP. I mean yesterday's race was 28 laps and that's actually, you know on the higher end
They usually like 23 laps 24 laps it seems and the shit is over in like, you know a little over an hour
And there's more passing in one race than you guys get in like half a fucking season. So I'm really trying to sell you on that
So anyway, I still been out here
enjoying myself I did the
I did the casino down there in Connecticut Foxwood's on Friday night
Had a great time. I'm still like the balance of my act is off right now
You know, I'm trashing too much shit and I'm not making fun of myself enough
So I just there's a certain feeling I get off I get when I get off stage and I do that
It was come off stage like yeah
You kind of sounded like a moron
How about being a little more humble a little more self-deprecating and then when you go off on something else
It'll hold a little more weight as opposed to you fucking
You know, I don't know
I was a little a little bit in a bad mood because I fucking go down there
This guy was driving us down to the gig and we get stuck in like fucking just dead stop traffic
And after like, you know 15 minutes of this shit
We finally come over the hill and the driver goes look at that. He goes. It's an accident
It's not even on this side of the road. Everybody's just slowing down to fucking look at it
I'm I just like out of these goddamn rubber-neckers and he's like these goddamn rubber-neckers, right?
And then what was hilarious? We pull up along the accident and our driver does the same thing
He totally slows down and becomes part of the problem
And I was with club soda Kenny and I'm just hitting this leg pointing at the guy going look at me
He's doing it the exact fucking thing. He just bitched about
you know
It's like when your girlfriend's like, you know, you need to be nicer to me
You need to appreciate me and then they they're not nice to you or they don't appreciate you. It was one of those deals
I'm sure men do it to two women, you know, I
Just haven't dated a guy yet. That's my next move. My next fucking move if this shit doesn't work out
I'm just gonna go gay at that point, you know
And just be like, all right
What do you know you like fucking sports? Can we at least fucking do that?
Anyway, so I've been eating like a fucking animal out here
But I've also been going on a lot of walks and frolicking along the beach
So I think I've been doing all right with the weight here, but uh,
You know, I had some bar pizza this week and I also get you boss in yours
Gotta get roast beef sandwich. I
Had a great fucking roast beef sandwich, but I fucking choked. I forgot how to order it
I had done in a while and they had this giant menu
The lady was all like, what do you want? And I was like
Sausage roast beef roast roast beef sandwich
And she like looks at me and looks at the menu she's like, yeah, which one do you want and I'm like
Sub
And now and then I regain my footing how big is a small
And I was like, okay, that sounded good and I just fucked up and I was like just lettuce tomato mayo
I forgot to order cheese and I didn't say to toast the butter heat it up. So I was just like fuck
It was still delicious though
Still delicious. I told you guys last week. I went to a clam chat shack. I got Chinese food
I had some bar pizza been trying some different places out here along the fucking coast
and
I
Don't know. I really
Kind of love being back here and one of my favorite things that sense of being back here is my MLB package is not working
because the game is blacked out and
The place I'm staying doesn't have nessan
So I've just been listening to the game on the radio the WEEI network
and
although I missed most of the fucking
Baltimore series because I was working or hanging out with friends and shit and of course they won every game
So they've won six of their last 14 games right six and eight in the last 14
I think I saw all eight games
that they
That they lost
And I missed all six games where they won
So at this point, I'm calling jinx. I didn't see all eight games. I probably saw six of the games that they lost
So I'm trying to stay away from them because we got the fucking New York Yankees coming to town
There are a couple games back, but they've played a few games
less than us
Chris sale is back, which is huge
For us. So we'll see we'll see what happens
You know, you got to have sale in the lineup because then that that's the guy that stops, you know from the losing streak
That's how I look at it. Oh, is that how it works bill? Oh, I think it does. I
Think it does you got a problem with that?
All right, you know, just I just feel like as a mother I just like nobody's helping me
What a way to start your day whining on social media, you know, why don't you be a man and do it on a podcast? All right? Oh
Oh
God I'm so full of shit. All right candid everybody. Let's do a little bit of advertising here
As I've been on dick sporting goods looking up kayaks
I'm into it, man
It's like being on a magic carpet right above like you could fly in a magic carpet above the jungle
And be like look at that lion down there
You know, you can't get me up here. That's not true. You know, I'm on notes. I'm on the surface
You ever see that shit at the zoo when they build like in a
One of those enclosures
For like a leopard or a lion and they think that it can't get out and then one day they realized like oh
It can get out. It was just never mad enough to want to get out and somebody goes to the zoo when they start fucking with the thing
And you know, once a cat a big cat just decides, you know what?
I believe I have to kill you. There is nothing anybody can do unless they're sitting there with a giant fucking gun and they're a good shot
Do you ever hear that story those kids were taunting that fucking?
Tiger was it in San Francisco? I
Don't know what they were saying. I don't know if they were fucking
You know
If the if the tiger was woke and he didn't like their politics, let's see
Kids taught
How do you spell taught you don't spell it like that kids taught tiger
San Francisco
Tiger that mauled three teens at San Francisco
That the tiger get a little teardrop tattoo before they killed it the tiger that mauled three teens at San Francisco zoo appears to have been provoked
This was ten years ago a female Siberian tiger
Killed in a hail of police gunfighter after fatally mauling a man at the San Francisco zoo on Christmas Day
2007
Likely was provoked into leaping and clawing out of its enclosure a federal investigator said in the documents obtained by the Associated Press
First of all, can we just stop for a second?
And just realize the story that those police officers have
For the rest of their lives, you know when they retire I was a police officer
Oh, were you and somebody tries to tell some crazy story. I had this perp
You know, he rolled up on it for in the morning stealing a car stereo. That's a fucking 80s thing to do for whatever
You know got into a gun battle. Oh, yeah
Is that what you did? I took my Glock out and I killed a fucking tiger
After it mauled three people at the zoo. All right, the tiger named Tatiana killed 17 year old
I'm not gonna say the person's name and injured his friends
Brothers
Oh, two brothers that were with them leaving claw marks etched in
The asphalt and claw frag fragments in the bushes of its pen claw marks were also discovered near the top of the enclosure
Which was lower than federal safety standards dictate showing that the big cat was able to get enough leverage to pull itself out
I bet that tiger was working out at night when none of the fucking zookeepers were looking
Doing fucking pull-ups in the human flag
It appears the tiger was able to jump from the bottom of the dry moat to the top of the wall and gain enough pressure
Over the top to pull herself out over the moat wall
With my knowledge of tiger behavior, I cannot imagine a tiger trying to jump out of its enclosure unless it was provoked
Yeah, I remember reading about this story and this fucking tiger got out of this thing
And there was all these innocent people who didn't do shit to the tiger and they were like, oh my god
you know
screaming bloody murder and the tiger
Ran by all of them
Trying to find this specific kid like this had nothing to do with any of your use
alright
He came back like fucking like the gun slinger when he walks into the saloon and everybody knows
There's gonna be a gunfight and all the regular people that churn butter and just fucking plow the fields behind oxen's
I'll stand up slowly and back out of the fucking bar
Until it's just the badass loner and the fucking piece of shit that did him wrong
That's what happened at that zoo except instead of Clint Eastwood or Charles Bronson
It was a tiger
It's fucking ridiculous
That they had to kill the tiger. They should have been yelling at those kids. Well, see that's that's why you don't fuck with the tiger
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All right, dear professor, we got all the questions here everybody's giving me shit
Saying that that fucking guy that said you can't tell a joke at school was trolling me
And it's just like well, that's one of the most easiest things to do
You know, I don't read
You know I
Hang out by myself. I'm very gullible. You know if that makes you feel like a bigger person if that's the way you get your fun
All right French runner
Bill did you see this French cunt at the Olympics? I love French cunts
I'm a part French cunt
He's a marathon runner knocked over all the water on the table so no one after him could get a sip
Oh, wow
Wow, I did not see that that is amazing
Sorry, I was so enamored watching they get wow he knocked them all down and then just grab the look. Oh
They're in water bottles
That is amazing hey, what's up, buddy?
You're being too loud am I being too loud why it came up to the top of the house so I wouldn't be loud
Am I saying the bad words
Okay, well maybe go down okay, I'm sorry I'm almost done here can you close the door I thought I closed the door
Is that conversation she just walked out of me?
That's hilarious
And you know what's great about that is they'll now be a new rule saying you can't do that and it'll be named after him
Well, you know to quote the Tampa Bay Lightning fans it dude, it's legal
It's nothing against it unless the Patriots do it then it's fucking cheating. That's one of those things
If somebody with a Patriots logo did that they would be a massive suspension
But if anybody else does it, it's just like it's a little gamesmanship
I think it's fucking hilarious
Because there is nothing to say that you can't fucking do that
And I would love to hear his excuse. I was so tired. I was hallucinating
I just reached out and it took me a second to register that I was touching water bottles
Specifically 24 of them in a row, but on the 25th and last one
I realized I was actually touching a water bottle and it was an illusion at which point my hand closed and I was able to pick it up. I
Apologize my heart goes out to the other racers
I think that's fucking hilarious. All right, Wendy's story slander
Hello, Billy Dave's double tits
Greetings from Dallas while I was driving into work. I was listening to your podcast where you're talking about your guilty outing to Wendy
Oh Wendy's this is who you're talking about. I think you said like trash some woman named Wendy. Wendy
You planted the idea into my head
Of what going to Wendy's so that while I work tirelessly through my morning as an electrical engineer
First of all, can we all just stop and just thank
this person
for how brave they are in what a warrior they are that
They're out there making sure people have their lights on and
Their cable TV so that they can watch the next episode of Down Under
I fantasize about the unhealthy mess of a burger that Wendy's could cook up to clog my art arteries
Come lunchtime. I ditched the salad that I packed and drove to the Wendy's down the road. Oh, man
I did this to you. You should have had the salad
Sorry, the first thing I noted that was off with your story was that Wendy's
That the Wendy's that I went to had Coke products on their menu pleasant surprise to me
Well the one I went to had a Pepsi
However, I didn't want any of your potential listeners to deter Wendy's from any profits due to the expectation of Pepsi products
Granted that this might be a Texas Wendy's versus California Wendy's thing. I took a picture of the menu
Okay, so do I got to match you with the thing? I mean, whatever it was it tasted like shit
So when it tastes like shit, I think that's a Pepsi. I
Might have been wrong. Who knows who knows on the subject of the menu. You also complained
Was I complaining or trying to make you laugh? No, I resent I resent that word. Okay, you know what?
I'm not accepting that
All right, I was complaining you're right that it was hard to find the plain burger meals on the contrary
The classic burgers were literally the number one meal
I'm taking a picture of it
Great now my kids gonna yell at me. You fucking cunt you fucking self-centered
You're just as fucking self-centered as I am you went to one many Wendy's in the middle of Texas
And then you immediately assume that this is what all fucking Wendy's like
I
Believe people who went to Wendy's I
Am a survivor and why are you not listening to my fucking story? You're not validating it
On the contrary the classic burgers were literally the number one meal on the menu
Well on mine if you wanted the classic ones it was just written in like they had a picture of all their new ones
And out of mine. It was just it was just written
Like it would just say single cheeseburger double cheeseburger
Triple cheeseburger and it was just all in plain black font that was a subset of a picture of a different burger like the
What the the ostentatious whatever the fuck they called it dumbass burgers the son of the the son of the motherfucker burger
Whatever they call it on the contrary the classic burger were literally the number one meal on the menu
I'm sure this is just the senile old bird talking and complaining how things aren't how they used to be and yelling at kids to stay off
His law
No, it isn't you just went to a different Wendy's
Okay, you live in Texas
Backward-ass, Texas
All right, you guys are behind the fucking curb. I live in fucking LA
Let me ask you this did it say how much all the calories were because that's what mine said
Listen buddy, it's a corporation
Okay, and in each area they're gonna find different things sell due to the demographic
Due to the level of education that's out there in the public schools
All right, you go out to LA everybody's on the fucking keto this diet this beach diet and that beach diet
But they know you're still gonna go to Wendy's so what they do is they go? Oh, this is this is bourbon bad
Are they try to make it seem more fucking healthy?
All right, so I think that that's what's going on here before you start questioning my mental stability. I
Know I can't read but I you know I can fucking read a fast-food menu
All right, I'm gonna take a picture of that buddy. All right, cuz you know what's funny is you have I don't see a picture of yours
Men you at least here. There's a giant question mark. Is that where the picture was and it didn't download. I don't know
Okay, here we go on the subject in menu also complain. Okay, wait another important note
Listen to this guy title. I think he's made an important note
If you had gotten a medium meal instead of a large fat-ass meal
You would have gotten your drink in a cup on a paper cup instead of the gigantic
Dolphin murdering plastic cup
Oh, is that our works all right
Was it like nobody in line behind you in your moment of gluttonous weakness you fucked over some fish
Which is going to swim into your giant-sized Wendy's plastic cup and die when the cup ends up in the ocean
Yeah way more than one fish it's gonna be out there for a thousand years
Now that I ate this double meal
I feel like death and feel that I need to run 20 miles to make up for the supposed
1500 calories that were in this meal. Oh, so they had the calories listed out there
All right. Well, you know something you fucking
fast-food eating cunt I
Understand that a lot of that was the grease the reason why you came at me and I also understand you break in my balls
But dude, I'm telling you. Let me just look like I look it up now
I
Here we go our fast food chain
Menus different in
It says in Florida in the Philippines in Hawaii
All right, what do I do here?
different
How do you spell difference different states
fast food chains adapt to local taste
There you go, buddy. All right, dum-dum
Well, I'm out here in Texas. I can tell you right now. They got the single they got the double they got the triple
It's the first fucking one. Yeah, that's because you guys still think the fucking world is flat
They know you're not fucking progressing out there. So they go with their old fucking menu
I'm reading the New Testament out here. That's got lettuce wrapped horseshit and giant fucking pepsis. All right
I'll meet you in fucking Arizona. We can look at the Wendy's out there. All right cancel culture of the past
Hey, Billy Redbeard by the way that information came from CNN.com. So, you know, who knows?
All right, there's reliable as the Fox guys there. I said it to both of them
So now they can fucking shut up cancel culture of the past. Hey, Billy Redbeard longtime listener first-time writer
So I was listening to an episode of the podcast where the guest starts talking about cancel culture of the 60s in regards to
McCarthyism and the Red Scare my dumb ass thought that was in the 50s
I guess the guy saw a twilight zone episode and addressed it guy concludes that if cancel culture was here 60 years ago
It's never going away. Do people not realize that this shit has always been here?
Yeah, people realize that there's always been people trying to end people's career
But in the past it was always people with power
You know, they achieve something they got to a certain level and then they abuse their power
You know back in the day the head of a studio could end some nobody's fucking career in a heartbeat
Right, but now the tape I don't think ever in history somebody that never accomplished anything nobody's ever heard of
Can end the career of a multi-millionaire?
Who has a fucking house with an infinity pool? I mean that you got to admit that's new, right?
You know what I mean, and I know that kings have been taken out of power
But like bloodshed happened if you're gonna compare like fucking storming a castle
By the serfs or whatever during medieval times to moving your thumbs and hitting send on Twitter
Like that's the same thing. I don't know. I think it's pretty amazing
Type of thing and as always what you see is that rich people are not evil
They're just regular people with money
That's all it is that whole fucking thing where they try to make oh, you know
You know white people are evil the blue-eyed devil and all that it's like no white people are you with unchecked power
When people have unchecked power
Regardless all of this if women ran the world now them to everybody
Everybody with unchecked power for the most part
You know, it's very rare that you get a Jimmy Carter
Very fucking rare
It's somebody that actually has empathy and is a caring human being and I love to this day that people still like yeah
But the guy wasn't a good president. It's like that's because all of those evil sociopaths wouldn't work with the guy
How many presidents
I mean the guys he's out, you know, they all just fucking buy mansions
And go to fucking Martha's vineyard. This guy is like in his 90s. He's still built building houses for homeless people
When in like Nobel Peace Prize is after he was in the White House, I mean the proofs in the pudding this very a very rare
person
Unfortunately, and if we just I think I believe that if you know male female gales gays gale gay straight
Whatever if you could get more people like that in power
And have them all working with each other
I think we'd be in a lot better position as opposed to just you know looking at ties in the colors of them or whatever
Anyway, do people not realize that this shit has always been here?
Just in recent memory everything from McCarthy isn't targeting targeting imaginary legions of communists to Anita Bryant
Trying to get every homosexual working in the public sector fired
Yes, but she's in a position of power, right?
To the satanic panic of the 80s trying to ban
Dungeon and Dragons
Yes, but all this is the difference though
This is the difference with all of that is those all were organizations that had power. I
Mean the PM RC was Al Gore's wife
Tipper Gore, so he at that point was like a fucking. I don't know what congressman or a senator. They had power
They had a microphone. They had a platform
Nowadays it can just be like, you know
Somebody that cleans a hotel room
And if the person in staying in the penthouse is a fucking asshole and they get it on video
That guy lose a him or her loses their career that this is a
whole new phenomenon and
Then you combine you combine that with
The abuse of that power which then when the trial is now on the internet
Where there's there's no rules of libel or slander and you can really just say whatever the fuck you want to say
Which used to be
just
the world of
Powerful people with money that they could you know
They could set the narrative now all regular people can do it
No, I think this is like a new thing and
I don't think that like what was happening with Lenny Bruce is
The same thing is what's happening to say comedians today where it then goes into their private life
You know you you know you could always get in trouble for shit that you said on stage
Absolutely, but it's just like, you know, he came into the Hooters and
You know, I just felt he was toxic and blah blah blah, but then all of a sudden you lose your agent. I know this is like a whole
like I
Don't know
That's like only you know, there's always been music
Sebastian, but you know, you know when that's a bastard fuck whatever the fucking real guy classical music and trying to compare that to
you know
People have always gone to concerts and been a little crazy people used to go to classical things and then comparing that to people going
To like raves and dying and shit like shit is you know can progress. That was a bad example
Fuck that the music one. I'll just say it
I don't think that we've been like
In a world where
Made up non-events about individuals who are telling shit jokes and strip malls
Can be the lead stories on
Late-night news that is allegedly news that isn't news
You know my whole time growing up. I mean comedians. I never saw George Carlin as a lead story
Like I mean I when Richard Pryor like lit himself on fire and ran down the fucking street. Yeah
But you know when he fucking was shooting up his cars, I didn't hear it
I mean, I guess I wasn't watching the news back then, but I just don't think it's I
Understand what you're saying if you're basically saying that since
The beginning of time people have tried to take out people without a doubt they have they absolutely have but like
This this thing I don't know I just I think it is is morphed in I guess the musical type of thing
It's just like you know jazz was big and now rock and roll is big. You know, yeah, you know, it's all music
It's all the same thing. It's like, okay. Yeah, I'll go with you on that level, but there's definitely a
I
find it disturbing that
people now do what like
these 24-hour news networks do
where
They'll put a headline on a video that's misleading and they'll also
Edit it in a way where it's just like you literally are like your own news network right now
You are trying to control the narrative of these stories and the fact that
You know every single person for the most part has a cell phone with a camera and
In video abilities and then they can upload whatever they shot
You know and and they decide when they can begin it when they can end it. I
Just know there's never been a time like this
There hasn't been
So I I
Disagree with what you're saying. I would say there's always been people trying to destroy people
But with the technology that is available now
For anybody to do it. I think this is a new level. How about that? How about we agree that there's a new level?
Anyways, there was a congressional hearing where rock stars and rappers had to go before government committees like some trial of
Socrates shit to prove that they weren't corrupting the American youth with their damn devil music
This shit never leaves. Yeah, but that's the government
It's always been there. It always will be here. It doesn't ebb and flow. It just changes targets. No
no
Sometimes its target is far enough away from me personally that we can pretend we don't see it happening stop saying we
This is your point stop acting like everybody agrees with you
I I 100% disagree with you that this cancel culture thing is not some new thing
You know it's it's
Been ramped up like I said back in the day you had to get into a position of power and you had to know enough people
To control the narrative
Of of what you wanted to have happen. You had to pay people off. You had to do all of that shit
Now like somebody, you know, you know in some ways it's good because you know if someone's actually doing something
And they are super powerful. It gives people who aren't powerful a voice that aspect of it is good
but with that power comes the abuse of it and
you know a
lot of the shit that you see out there, so I
Disagree with what I agree that that people have always been trying to take out people but back in the day for the most part
it was it was powerful people
doing it and
Everybody walking down the street didn't have the ability to create their own news story
With their own thoughts and their own video and their own like clips
I mean look at that little fucking clickbait and all of that shit that they have out there that just regular regular people do that now
Because they know what plays and they know what they have to say
To get people to click on it so they can get click on it so they can get eyeballs so they get people to advertise like
There's never been a time in history where every person walking down the street is thinking like they're running their own TV network and
Then you combine that with how most people cannot handle positions of power and you have this shit show that is going on right now
Which I think
That it's as the similar thing from back then was it's always just been a distraction
From what's really going on what you really should be say paying attention to
You know who actually has the money who really is running things what direction are we really going in how politicians are all kind of paid off
They're deliberately underpaid so they owe people favors
That whole fucking horse shit where you can attach all those things to bills
So horrific things get attached to things that people want and then we don't have we don't get a right to vote on a lot of those
All of that bullshit. I
Don't know. I disagree with you. I respect your opinion. There you go. Please don't cancel me. All right angels of Fenway
Hey saggy tits I
Just listened to the latest episode of the Thursday afternoon just before Friday Monday morning podcast and since you got
Sentimental about being back in Boston and sitting by the ocean. I thought I'd send you a song recommendation
You probably know this but in case you don't check out James Taylor's Angels of Fenway
I don't know this would be interesting to hear what you think. I heard you making fun of James Taylor a few times I
Made fun I make fun dude. I did so much shit. I make fun of that. I actually like
Okay
You know, I like the carpenters, but you know
Rainy days and Mondays always get me down
I'm gonna make fun of that song, but I also and when I hear it
I go back to riding in the back of a station wagon in the 70s. So there's part of me that likes it. I like James Taylor
I also like making fun of him
I also like that blacktop movie that he made whatever the fuck it was called. I forget aren't so anyway
So you open up a diet fan. So open up a diet fan
Sit down by the ocean and give it a listen. Love your comedy and podcast
Please keep doing what you're doing all the best from Germany
That's pretty random somebody from Germany would know all of that stuff. Maybe it's a military guy there
You mean one of the troops
One of the heroes
See, let's listen to James Taylor
Angels of Fenway, I can already tell you right now
I'm already getting uncomfortable just with the name of it, but that has to do with me and my childhood more
more than James Taylor angels of
Fenway, oh
boy
No, boy, here we go. Let's see how far into the song I can get
Wait a minute, did he write this for the red
Okay, okay, okay, that is the Red Sox
Version of like those 9-eleven songs
That all those country guys wrote, you know what I mean? I'm Uncle Sam's gonna put a boot in your ass
Now I'm not saying that the person who wrote that song's heart wasn't in the right place but to you know
To just sort of capitalize on that and I know you donated the money to the fucking
Ambulance drivers and the firefighters and all that shit
but you also got your big mug put right in the middle of the fucking footage in
Country music stars responding to the horrors that we saw last week. This is
fucking
whatever
You know fucking Colt McRanch face
his fucking
Terrorism fan, we don't like it
American flag
Sing it with me
Put down your Friday
Sorry
You know that tragedy it happened to all of us and everybody has a right to
react
You can be silent you can use your voice you can be creative
It's okay to be angry
It's okay to cry
Never hear people say stuff like that. I just think to them like
How fucked up are you?
That's a good question. I want to ask on a scale of one to ten emotionally. How fucked up are you?
That you feel that you need to take care of the world and
Your ego is telling you that you have the ability to do it
What happened to you?
How much were you beaten down as a child that your ego now tells you like I need to speak on this I
Need to say something
And when I say something I'm gonna say something that's already been said
And I'll just combine it
Be brave
Be courageous
Be original not really just say the things that you say
Thoughts and prayers with the families
During this difficult time
People if you need help know that there's help out there
I love people have this literally sound bites to say
When somebody kills themselves when there's a tragedy
You know, it's like you didn't even take enough time to write something original a
A stitch in time saves nine
Hold your children a little closer tonight
Just like
You're going with stock lines
Well, what about this tragedy said to you that it wasn't unique enough or painful enough for you to come up with something original?
I'm being a douche this week. All right, everybody
That is the podcast go fuck yourselves. I'll check in on you on Thursday. I'm gonna fucking
Hang out and watch the fucking Yankees and Red Sox
they got a double-headed tomorrow and
And then he got Wednesday. Oh, and I got a big special guest
For the Thursday afternoon just before Friday money morning podcast that in show business is known as a effing
No, Jesus. That's why I said effing wait. It's known as a teaser. All right, that's the podcast everybody. All right, stay safe
help each other
Pour some ice over your head
Do the things that you need to do that you'd want to be done to others if they were you while you were
being brave and
You know looking up at the sky and just being present, okay, I'll see you