Monday Morning Podcast - Thanksgiving, Inventory, Public Schools | Monday Morning Podcast 11-24-25

Episode Date: November 24, 2025

Bill rambles about Thanksgiving heroes, inventory habits, and life after public schools. SimpliSafe:  Go to www.SimpliSafe.com/BURR today and you will get 60% off any new system. This is their best deal of the year—you won’t ever see a better price. 

Hey, what's going on? It's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday, November 20, fucking 5th, 2000, 25. What's going on? How are you? 1125, 25. How's it going, man? Happy Thanksgiving week.

You know, arguably the best holiday out there. you know all you got to do is fucking show up and eat unless you know the true heroes of thanksgiving the people that go out and actually make the meals while everybody else shows up with like a fucking bottle of wine some half-ass effort you swung by a liquor store on the drive over um but you know let's how about a shout out to those people how about those people that enjoy the holidays and put zero effort in that's probably like that's really like is there a slang word for the person that like just you know i don't know what it what the fuck would that be it's almost like when

you have a buddy that has a boat you know and you just show up with like a 12 pack or some shit and then he has to deal with the boat and you get to enjoy the boat but you don't have to pay the insurance you don't got to take it out of the water you don't have to get the bonicles taken off so that person shows up thanksgiving they got a fucking bottle of wine they're not doing any dishes you know what I mean they didn't cook anything they went to a liquor store and showed up with a bottle of red bottle of white and they just did It could, you know, those people who fucking Thanksgiving's on a Thursday and their behavior is no different than any other Thursday. Shout out to them too. There's all different kinds of people out there. Some people are in the game, driving the fucking team down the field and other people, the place kicker. You know, still an important role on the team. They play, they do play a role.

You know what they do is they make the people that actually do the work to make it a nice holiday look better. You know? Anyway, I always like Thanksgiving. I always thought it was a nice, you didn't have to wear a costume. you didn't have to buy a bunch of shit, you know, you show up, you hang out with people you love, you watch football, inevitably, somehow you always end up outside, either throwing a football, smoking a cigar, I don't know what, holding somebody as they cry quietly,

you know, the holidays. yeah so anyway speaking of the holidays um i am essentially done with all of my holiday shopping and it's wrapped and it's ready to go which is uh i've never done this i don't know what it was it was just something about going through this shit again like because i i love thanksgiving right so i love Halloween because, you know, having kids and stuff, having them go out to Halloween is great. And then I look forward to Thanksgiving, which I feel is like, you know, Halloween's for kids, Christmas is for kids, and the Thanksgiving, that's the one for adults. And everybody fucking blows by.

You know how you know it's for adults is there's no songs about it. I am kind of amazed that capitalism hasn't figured out a fucking way to make you spend way more money. on Thanksgiving. I mean, it's a tough one. If you really put on your capitalist hat, I mean, I'm not going to get into details, but terrorist attacks, you know,

foreign and domestic terrorist attacks are still ways that people figure out how to earn money. Everything from false charity, to merch and all of that type of stuff. Like very quickly it gets like, you know, in remembrance and blah, blah, blah. And it's like, you're kind of making,

what are you doing with that money that you get, you're donating it to people? A portion of the proceeds. I would just love to see one honest piece of shit out there that actually has a sign out in front of their house that this house was purchased on the rest of the portion of the proceeds on the majority of the portions of the proceeds this gated community house was purchased yeah but it's just it's a hard one you know who wants no one

like a turkey is not a desirable animal no one wants to dress up like a turkey it's not a animal. There's a lot of browns and oranges. It's just not good colors. Nothing really pops. Pretty much the colors of Thanksgiving represent the death of trees. Just browns and yellows.

They don't even, you know, maybe like a little bit of foliage. They just can't do it. It's kind of fucking, you got to give it up Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving never sold out. Christmas sold out. If you're a religious person, that's the birthday of Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ, right?

And all of a sudden, who comes in to steal the thunder? It's the holiday season. Dooby-dooby-do, right? The fucking Santa Claus comes in. You know, with all those religious wackos out there, you'd think that Mall Santas would be getting more shit. Sorry, I'm yawning. I just can't sleep, but it's like fucking three in the morning.

You would think that Mall Santas would get way more shit. You know, you'd think that somebody would come walking in and be like, this isn't about you, man. Jesus never made you buy anything. I mean, you did have to wash his feet. Did you have to? I never quite understood that story. Somebody came over.

His feet must have been filthy. Jesus Christ, he was always walking around. He was a man of the people. Could you say that Jesus was the first street magician? He was sort of David Blaine before David Blaine. You know, like when David Blaine does, like, street magic and black people, ah, they, like, run away. That would be a great sketch.

Like, Jesus just keeps pulling fish out of the basket. And, like, black people back then, like, run away. Or he walks on water and just medieval people. Oh, shit. And they just fucking run away. Um, anyway, what the fuck do I know? What do I know? Not a goddamn thing. I lost a lot of games picking this week. It's inevitable. I was crushing it for like six weeks going three and one, three and one, three and one, three and one, two, three and one, two, three and one, right?

So then what happens? You go one and three, one and three, and it's just, you just give it all back. It's the stupidest thing ever trying to win that shit. I don't know how I might have gone two and two I don't know I won the Patriots game that one I called six and a half point spread I was just like you know Joe Flacko he's got too much too much I didn't like the half a point and this is how good Vegas is Patriots won by six I mean it really is bananas that you You're going up against the corporation that runs sports gambling. And not only do they have like these geniuses who could fucking pick spreads before computers. Now you have these geniuses that actually have computers in analytics, in programs and with like probabilities. I mean, it has to be fucking, it's got to be a, you know. I feel like you ever see like those those those pirates that like pull up on like a cargo ship

and they got this little ass boat going up against this big ass boat and then they got these guns and just the futile effort of that that these pirates think that they're going to do this little boat are going to somehow catch up with the bigger boat and not get sunk that's kind of sports gambling is it bill i don't know what it is you see the commercials everybody's having a great time i don't know but you also see commercials when they sell cars and the person who bought the car just had a great time they don't have that bewildered look on their faces they walk out like hey wait a minute am i the one who got screwed i thought i got over on them wait a second

wait a minute um i've been doing some stand-up up. Getting ready. I got a show first week of December up in Bakersfield. And I'm excited to do that and get ready to go back out on tour next year. We'll see how that all of that shakes out. Oh, and also, I finished that series that I was telling you on the Criterion collection that those three movies Carlos starring

Edgar Ramirez I can't say enough about those three movies you got to check that you got to check the thing out and when you're done watching the three movies you got to watch

the interview with Edgar where he breaks down the character and his feelings on him how he played him. And the fact that everybody involved in that project dedicated a year of their lives to make it. It's really an astounding, like, movie achievement.

It was just fucking unbelievable. I'm surprised more people don't know about it. Or maybe, I don't know, maybe I just discovered it and I just assumed that no one else knows about it. um anyway and i also started watching this other movie called death by hanging which i just got in the beginning of it i just been watching a bunch of fucking i don't know

movie recommendations from i got a few friends of mine that are actors that are just like you know you know it's like the sports fans that can name like offensive linemen i have a few friends of mine i have a few friends that are on like the movie level of that so they are like as far away from like big hollywood movie franchises of like you know superheroes or those those um car ones and uh i've been having i don't it's really kind of astounding how many ridiculously talented people there are out there so i'm just going to keep recommending those um as i go

As I go along, and also something else that I mentioned to you guys, that, you know, I was talking about with my drumming where I'm trying to, like, free myself up to be able to play ideas that I hear. And I started doing that, and it's immediately changing how I play in a good way. So it's fucking really exciting. Yeah, I've been doing that. I went to the Bruins Kings game the other night with one of my great friends that I started, well, I started a few years after he did, but I started out in Boston,

Jackie Flynn. I've known him. I can't believe it at this point, like over 30 years. And we went to the Bruins game and just, you know, first of all, saw a great game, a great game. It was like zero to zero until like, you know, five, six minutes

left in the game. Bruin scored first, Morgan Geeky. Then, of course, we left a fucking short-handed goal. And it goes into overtime. And then the three-on-three, which is so much fun to watch. And Morgan Geeky got the second one, sniped them both times. And we both just sat there talking about the old days. Going to the Boston Guard and everything.

and Jackie was telling me that he went to his first game in 1970. And I was like, you saw Bobby O'er and all of those guys? He was like, yeah, the game. He was just, oh, that's right. We were trying to remember two old guys. He goes, oh, I'll send you a clip of the game. He goes, they were playing Toronto. And a guy on the other team, he goes, I swear to God there was a fight.

And he punched the referee on purpose and got a massive suspension. He goes, I found like this old like VHS. I think it was actually before VHS. grainy footage of um of that uh that incident so i got to get i got to get him to send me that and i was telling him the first time i went it was the 1983 84 season and i had been watching the bruin since about 1980 i caught uh the end of wayne cashman's career stan jonathan um it had become terry o'reilly's team And I caught that whole wave of, like, you know, Peter McNabb, the last guy to wear number eight before Cam Neely.

Rick Middleton, the end of Brad Park's career and all of that. God, those were such fucking great days. So the game I went to that year, the Bruins won the president's trophy. and so of course the Canadians we were in first place in the Adams Division and the Canadians were in fourth so one played four that's how they did it back then and um in each division right so it was best three out of five and of course the Canadians came in and swept us and it was funny though it was like this fucking despondency I remember of like we're never going to beat the Canadians we can't beat the Canadians. What was so weird is our Stanley Cup drought was only 12 years at that point.

And now I'm looking at like right now, like, it doesn't seem like, you know, the Bruins haven't won it for such a long time, but it's actually been 14 years. Oh my God, I cannot fucking believe that. But yeah. So anyway, I went to the Boston Garden and we're all excited. Oh, the President's Trophy, like this year we're going to beat the Canadians. And this is like pre-Patrick why like i went up and i i like looked up the names like larry robinson and gila floor was was still on that team left over from uh the uh the dynasty 76 to 79 that the canadians had and the infamous too many men on the ice which i'm so i'm so thankful that i was too young to have watched that game and um larry robinson he had a fight in the game that i

went to, which I don't even remember. And whoever he fought on the Bruins got four minutes for roughing. So that's like one of those deals where I feel like there was a lot of pushing and shoving and Larry dropped the gloves and the Bruin guy didn't trying to, I don't know, give us a minute penalty. And it was a two to one game. And I don't remember anything from the game other than I couldn't believe I was at the Boston Garden. Because the only other time I had been there, I saw the Harlem Globe Trotters when I was a kid and the ice capades. And go. And go going to that game started my whole, like, after that, I went to countless Bruins games. And like the first 10 games I went to, it was always Bruins versus Canadians.

Because I like the fights. I like the aggressiveness of, of the games and the atmosphere. Like it didn't make a difference if we were playing the Canadians in April in the playoffs or May in the playoffs or like in November it was this it was the energy was just like you felt like the roof was going to come off the the garden but um anyway we went to the game and how I did it was I was taking you know failing miserably this French class and the French exchange students were there and somehow public schools they got Bruins tickets and they took the French kids and like kids like me from the French class to a hockey game and it was Bruins versus the Canadians and you know the Canadians

are in French speaking Quebec so I just remembered that the French exchange students were actively rooting for the Canadians and the Boston Garden and I was really worried that they were going to get into a fight and they were going fucking crazy rooting for I think you would have thought they watched hockey their whole lives um and they also knew that they were going to that they were, like, they bought, like, Canadian, like, merch somehow at the garden. I think they went, they, you know, like outside when you would walk in, there would be the street vendors, and they would always have, like, 99% your shit. And then a couple of straggler things for people who maybe traveled,

which didn't happen a lot back then. But I guess they bought that shit. And I just remembered them screaming in French, and Bruin fans turn around, tell them to shut the fuck up. And I remember my French teacher. this poor woman was in the middle of it so

sort of looking over and making this like geez like what is going on and I remember thinking like this woman does not realize the potential danger that she's in right now it's like you speak French

do you know anything about Boston sports fans you should tell these French kids to fucking tone it down and I remember thinking beyond wanting the Bruins to win at one point I was thinking like the Bruins better win this game because if they don't somebody's going to take it out on these fucking kids and they were just like you know 15 14 15 like however old I was then I was I think it was 16 almost 16 when when I went to that game but anyway I was at the game with Jackie and we were just talking about all of this fucking all of that stuff and I was telling them how I went to the bench clearing brawl Bruins kids Canadians game when the benches faced each other and Nyland hit fucking Milbury with the butt of his stick. Jay Miller was the ref tackle Jay Miller and Jay Miller was on the ice looking at Chris Nyland and you could see him clear his day, Rita's lips going pointing at Nyland going,

I'm going to get you motherfucker. And then Nyland like gets brought into the dressing room, got like a 10 minute misconduct. And they, of course, because nothing made sense back there. Not only do the benches face each other but like when if you got a 10 minute misconduct as a member of the other team to walk to the dressing room you had to go by the Bruins bench and i don't know if linsman said something but nileland went by and he pushed ken linsman and then ken linsman to his credit i don't know what he was thinking he ran up the aisle the hallway to go fight chris nylon it was like twice his size and then a whole brawl broke out it was boston and cops involved. Terry O'Reilly was a coach at that point wearing a sport coat. I remember

grabbing a Canadian player when they came across the ice. I think Nevin Marquod had a fight. It was insane. So we were sitting there now in 2025 as they got the Jumbotron and everybody's doing like their dancers and doing all of this shit up there, kiss cams, all of this stuff. Like how much the game has changed. And we were like laughing going like, yeah, there was none of this shit it was just like you came in there like the the um the scoreboard above the ice the boston garden all it was was information there was no video it just had the time left the score was in red the time left was in like white lights score was in red and then i don't know what else they had they like penalty minutes and stuff like that was really a simple not simple

The thing was fucking gigantic, but it was just like, just basic things. And what I loved about back then was it wasn't some DJ creating a vibe. Like the people that went to the game, their knowledge of the game, the history between the two teams, whatever was going on in the story of your team and the other team at that point, that's what created the vibe. Or even like the holidays, people who come there hammered. fucking what the Santa Claus hat on or whatever and it was uh there'd be fights in the stands

it was a really it was fucking wild I still remember seeing this fight in the stands it's some game I went to and this cop had gone up there to break it up this security it was they used to have like they were like cops it wasn't like security

that had to do with the Bruins or the or the arena it was just Boston cops and I just remember like an idiot I went up into the section to get a closer look at the fight and all of a sudden the fight spilled down as the aisle where I was and I was like oh fuck I got to get out of this and I just remember this cup had grabbed one of the guys and I still don't know how he did it it looked like he had a handful of the guy's neck he didn't have him from the front of the back he had him from the side of the neck and he almost had his hand closed like he was grabbing him by like the scruff of his neck or the back of his shirt

but it was like the guy's jugular and he was fucking just marching this guy down the stairs and that guy had a look on his face like somebody had a handful of his neck and I just remember the cop repeatedly saying try to push me down the stairs but I'd push me down the stairs as he the stairs as he was coming down the thing and um i don't know it was just such a great time going back and uh remembering all of those fucking wild times and uh going to the game and everything and i um you know just from doing like the cam neely dennis leary commerce come home thing i've gotten to known some people in that organization and we got to talk to them before the game it was just fucking great it was just fucking great it was a

really great. I also love that the Bruins have gone back to like the jersey that they wear now where they don't have the yellow going down the sleeves. It looks like the home jersey and the way jersey looked like the home and away jersey when I first started going to games except they just reversed. So the jersey they were wearing at the crypto fucking whatever the hell you call the Staples Center now was the home jersey that I saw the first time I saw them at the first game I went to, it fucking took me back to that

with Pete Peters. Keith Crowder, Bruce Crowder, Tom Fergus, Mike Crucial Nisky. Remember all those names? Brian Curran. Peter McNabb. All of those guys. From way the fuck back in the day.

All right. That was old Billy reminiscent. And reminiscent. All right. Let's get into the Reeb for the week. Simply Safe, everybody. You know, if you listen to this show, you know, I absolutely love my Simply Safe home security system.

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Get 60% off your new system at simplysafe.com slash burr. There's no safe, like SimplySafe. All right, let's get to the Reads here for the week. Let's get to the reads. I just scrolled up there. All right, here we go. when websites say they're sold out oh yeah this is what i you know i was doing like some shopping online and i find like the cool thing that you want is never available there's no sizes left it's already

sold out but all the other bullshit that you don't want is readily available and i'm sitting there going like i'm on your website so i'm not in a store i get how a store doesn't have get sold out, but, like, I'm going directly to the manufacturer here. I'm in your warehouse. You wow. I remember you saw her by that guy. This is not a factory. It's a wow.

That was I'm trying to say warehouse. Anyway, sorry, I got fucking distracted. I don't know why I'm doing a podcast at fucking 3.35 in the morning. Anyway, yeah, like, you shouldn't be sold out. Like, how does that happen? I just think they just say that they're sold out when they find out their, like, what, okay, but my theory is they see what's the most popular thing. They have it there.

They have a set number that they're going to sell, and then they're going to say that they're sold out when they're not. And then they're going to try to get people to pay, well, fuck it. I'll just buy this so they can move less popular stuff, so they're not stuck with it and they don't have to throw it in the ocean and it doesn't end up floating up on the shores of Africa, which is what's happening now. All those clothes you drop off at goodwill. Nobody wants them and they throw them in the ocean and all these pants and shirts. This consumerism is fucking insane.

It's so out of control, like most things. It's so out of control. Oh my God, that was another thing Jackie said. he was talking about like aliens and stuff and like how we're going to discover soon that they exist and like the evidence and he did the the thing that a lot of my friends do like they go to use an expression and they either don't say it right or they combine it and he goes with all that thing he goes I can't dismiss it out of hand and I go what the fuck does that mean I know what I can't dismiss it

and what do you mean out of hand and we were just laughing it because it made sense to him and I go, dude, like out of hand a party's out of hand. Your behavior is like out of hand and then you dismiss something or you dismiss a person,

you're in the military, you're dismissed. Dismiss it out of hand. There's a new one. Anyway, this person's going to, I guess, break down when websites say they're sold, out. Hey, Bill, heard you talk about how website list items is sold out to make you buy stuff

that isn't selling. Not saying you're wrong, but as someone with years of e-commerce experience, if a business has something that people want, they will make it available. Supply and demand. If they have something that isn't selling, they're more likely to sell it at a discount and keep upping the discount until it sells. I would really love to believe that. Anyway, this person said, I worked for a company that sold thousands of items online and many things we did not have stock of. Sales were going well, but we had one manager who got greedy and started listing things as in-stocked even though they were sold out with the aim to get sales through the door, then rushed to get them in stock from our supplier. I warned against this saying customers will get pissed off if they have to wait indefinitely. for something they've already paid for. But they went ahead and did it anyway. Sales took off, but then as I predicted,

customers stopped ordering from us when they realized they couldn't trust us. A short-term game for a long-term loss. Oh, there you go. Come back to Australia sometime. I know it's a long way from home, but Nia and the kids, oh, bring Nia and the kids. The kids would love it here.

The beaches, the rainforest. You have a rain? forest over there? Google Whitehaven Beach and show it to Nia and the kiddos. Thanks and go fuck yourself from a fellow bald. Wait a minute.

My idea of Australia is the most beautiful beaches I've ever seen and that all of your lush vegetation exists along the coast and the entire middle of your country is badlands. That's what I thought.

And then that's what that ACDC song, Highway to Hell is, was they were singing about getting in a van to play a gig where they had to drive through the badlands out to some bar in the middle of fucking nowhere to play a gig. It was called the Highway to Hell. And I remember hearing about that. I was amazed because I always thought Highway

to hell was ACDC sort of joking about stairway to heaven. That, you know, Led Zeppelin sings about stairway to heaven. We talk about the highway to hell. Sorry, yawning, yawning, sorry. I always thought that there was some sort of correlation. Oh, my God. Where did I get that one? I fucking pulled that word out.

Oh, Billy Bigword. Some sort of correlation between the two. anyway i would love to go back i haven't been there in 10 years um a lot has happened in 10 years my lovely wife gave me two beautiful children who are amazing i was talking to my son you know he got his holiday uh haircut right so i was telling him how good he looked and he looked at me he goes dad when are you getting your haircut i go well i don't have any hair i i shave my hair my head and he was asking me why and everything i said yeah that's what i do i go i just The only thing I got to do is keep my beard trimmed.

I asked him, I said, hey, I go, are you going to grow a, are you going to grow a beard someday? And he goes, no. And I said, why not? And he goes, because I'm not a dad and I don't drink coffee. I drink water only. It's just too goddamn funny. And he bought, at this book fair, I got him. this shark book and he is absolutely

obsessed with it. He actually brought it to the barbershop and it comes with like these shark teeth that came in a clear plastic thing on the front and he is absolutely obsessed with it but it's like a really like advanced book so when he gets the book he goes

dad I don't want you to read it I just want to look at the pictures because it's really like I don't know it's kind of for like an 11 or a 12 year old to be honest with you as far as like the detail that it that it has um all right world cup 2026 baldy bastard billy uh long time listener first time caller parentheses emailer you actually had some remnants of hair when i first started listening if that gives you any idea um this person goes on to say uh anyway

What did I just do here? Went back up to the top. Anyway, you used to show a short-lived interest in football, soccer to you. And now I'm curious if that interest is reigniting now that the U.S. and specifically Los Angeles are hosting the World Cup. I'm definitely going to go. And my kids are really into soccer, as are a lot of kids nowadays. and um you know i take them to soccer practice and stuff and uh i actually really enjoy the game um but as far as like my interest in it like i don't have time i would have to abandon an american

sport and the only way i can explain that to you is would you abandon you know soccer for an american sport or What is that? The seven nation rugby thing where you win a trophy or the wooden spoon for the worst team. I mean, you're going to, you know, what happens is whatever you watched, like, growing up, it's really hard to break away from that and make time for a new sport for the simple fact that, like, the amount of, like, memories, like, going to that Bruins game and just going with the old school Bruin fan and talking about the Boston Garden and laughing and just having, like, best time like i don't know you you have all this time invested in these sports to just like walk

away from them i don't know i don't know how i can do that but i've seen people do it i've seen like it always fascinates people that can change allegiances i mean i did get into moto gp i mean maybe that i guess that's one thing um anyway i must continue on here this person says i'm from scotland and this week we qualified for our first world cup in 28 years which sent the whole country into a state of euphoria due to the ridiculously dramatic way in which we qualified. All right. Well, I'm in. I want to hear the story.

You may have Irish blood, so a Celtic connection there already. I have Scottish blood, too. England, Scotland, and Ireland, I have, as far as I know. I mean, I never did it 23 in me because there's no way I'm not going to find a fucking serial killer or something. in my family. And I ain't no rat. No, actually, the real reason why I don't do it is because I'm not giving a corporation DNA.

You saw what happened. They turn around and they sold it to the cops. It's just fucking wild. The just complete lack of privacy. And all of these politicians through kickbacks are just letting these corporations do it. It's really an amazing, amazing thing in a sad way.

Which reminds me, I wanted to, like, develop a bit about how, the only way I'm making sense of what's going on, the insanity of what's going on in the world right now, as far as climate change, whatever the fuck they, the new way that they want to call, instead of global warming. Climate change, like the change of the seasons.

Them admitting to spraying chemicals into the fucking atmosphere, what they've done to the food supply, false wars. You know, Venezuela claiming that they caught mercenaries, you know, kidnapping Venezuelan soldiers. They were going to switch uniforms in allegedly, attack a U.S. ship it was allegedly CIA backed to get us in a war down there

and I'm like, oh my God, like what is like all of this shit going on. And then you have like religion and all of that stuff and that there's this loving God that made us and is judging us and all of this stuff. And um I was just thinking about, like, if God really loved us,

he wouldn't make all of these awful people. And I'm thinking maybe he makes these awful people because he wanted a beginning, middle, and end of humanity. And I remember reading this thing one time that there's this bacteria in your gut and it's in your body from the second you're born and that's a whole other religious argument but I'm saying like whatever the day you're holding your newborn baby everybody has this bacteria in their gut and it's for when you die and when you die the bacteria activates and it's what

begins to decomposing of your body and I kind of view like if there is a god and he's made this system and everything that if he's a loving god he wouldn't make sociopaths psychopaths greedy people in all of this shit he would never have made that and all of those types of people are leading humanity marching us briskly towards the end and i almost few those people as the human form of that bacteria that's in your gut tried it one night on stage and people were just staring at me like I don't know where you're going with that there fucking baldie but uh have fun with that premise um anyway getting back to the sports thing uh you may have Irish blood so a Celtic connection there already

um but you also being a sports fan and fan of live events with passionate crowds I have a strong feeling you would get goosebumps watching these highlights. If that doesn't set off some interest in the World Cup for next year, then nothing will. You know what I'm going to do? I'm actually going to hit pause and watch that. Okay, I just watched the highlight. Yeah, that was fucking amazing. All right, for all the Americans listening,

Scotland went up 1-0, then it was 1-1 playing Denmark, and then it was 2-1 and then 2-2 and then they scored the third goal and then they scored the fourth goal but like you got to watch the I'll put the clip up there I will say the bicycle kick the header

and then of course that last goal from fucking center ice as they say in the United States yeah that was amazing I will say what was bullshit is that red card on that guy from Denmark number 13 he didn't even fucking touch the guy the guy. Didn't even touch

the guy, but other than that. And that announcer, Jesus Christ, if you haven't won it in 30 years, like, he was like trying to jinx you guys when he went up three or two. He's like, surely that's enough. Surely that punches a ticket to go to America. Then, of course,

Denmark comes back and scores. Ah, you fucking cunt! Yeah, that was that was definitely yeah but this is the thing like if I watch if I watch a soccer game over there

with crowds with that level of passion and singing and doing all of that stuff I can get into it over here the only time it seems to get like that is if the Mexican team is playing in L.A then the level of excitement And it still doesn't match, you know, what I just watched or the games I see in, like, South America and stuff, Africa, the Middle East, everything.

Like, it's just, I mean, that's your guy's sport. That's what you grew up on. That's your memories and all of that stuff. But, like, yeah, that definitely was, that was awesome. I'm not going to lie to you. I do, I don't give a shit what sport it is. I definitely have an appreciation for any sort of dramatics that has to do with sports and then fans absolutely losing them.

I mean, you could hear from the crowd, like the years that these people have emotional investment in this team. So that's amazing. Anyways, this person says, goes on to say, so I do hope that you are excited to host the greatest show on Earth. even though you will only likely be hosting us for three games before we get knocked out, seeing as we know we're shite, really. Oh, God. I love that part of the world. You guys are fucking hilarious.

Scottish people are fucking hilarious. And they're not even trying to be. I swear to God, they just are. It's amazing. It's effortless, effortlessly hilarious. Anyways, continuing. If L.A. is to host a Scotland match, please share the location for where your source, your factor 50 sunscreen, as you certainly won't be the only pasty bastard in town that week. You know what?

I might go to the fucking Scotland game. I might go. In the meantime, go take a flying fuck to yourself. Ben from Scotland, living in London, behind enemy lines. I really want to thank you for that. I think you just gave me a not only, I mean, this is what I want to, to be honest with you. I want to go to the Scotland game, because that's the part of the world most of my lineage is from. And then I got to go to a South America, some team from South America because of, I remember the first time watching the World Cup and watching Argentina and Brazil and all of those teams and the fans going crazy.

I should go to a couple of games. I really should do it. You know what? God damn it. That's a great idea. And you know what's going to happen is I'm going to be having like acting work or something. And I got a couple things I'm doing next year that are going to take like a month.

And God knows it's going to happen during the fucking World Cup. But thank you for sending me that. And anybody else, you know, obscure sports for an American, if you want to send them my way. And soccer still is, it's not an obscure sport, but it's just down the list. I can't believe that announcer. Shirley, that's going to be enough.

It's like, even I was going, shut the fuck up. Don't jigs them. All right, surfers. Surely the Scottish fans have nothing to fucking worry about. Oh, for the love of Jesus. Surfers Journal. Hey, Billy Beachball. Got to be talking about my head and my coloring.

Was flipping through the pages of a relatively recent issue of the surface journal and came upon a portrait of you at Fenway Park by the talented Brian Nevin. You were sporting a Red Sox ball cap while peeking through the scoreboard. Great shot. Well, you know what? I'm in my office and that picture is literally, I have it framed above me right now. Above my couch here. The caption read, I do a lot of commercial work with celebrities, usually get,

30 seconds to take their portrait and their assholes the whole time. But I ended up spending six hours with comedian Bill Burr before the show. He was super cool. Well, that's nice. He goes such a camera cougar.

What were you doing during those six hours? Jokes aside, oh, six hours? I think I was doing Well, we walked around Fenway Park, then we did some, I think, other shots in Boston, and then he must have gone on, like, the press that morning, too. He probably did that.

He probably met, or he also watched the show. It could have been that. I don't remember. That was a long time ago. But I've never had a six-hour, like, photo shoot. So if I remember correctly, You know, we took one, I got a great one of me near the pesky pole calling the phone, the bullpen phone, sitting in the stands, being inside the green monster. And then the fan load in, the show, the fans leaving.

I think he shot the whole show. I believe that that's what it was. And then he probably hung at the after party afterwards where they, Lettuce smoke cigars in Fenway Park. So it was probably all of that. Anyway, jokes aside, in my mind, the publication is to the surfing world what, wait a minute, what are you talking about? Jokes aside, in my mind, oh, publication is the surfing world, is to the surfing world,

what the New Yorker is to the literary world. I worship surfers' journal as one of the few resisting, temples in a vastly commercialized surf world seeing your mug in it was a great surprise yet unsurprising you managed to be popular and on the edge okay enough with the ass kicking gas kicking sorry i went back to my childhood okay enough with the ass kissing go fuck yourself once and for all hope you return to france in the future uh a la prochean mon ami um i think that means the next time my friend or it's just an expression that means i'll talk to you soon or something less amen pro shed means next week um dude i'm really getting good at that fucking shit like reading it

and listening to it and understanding it and i'm starting to understand chunks of dialogue it's really fucking exciting because like you guys i was in the public school system and it gives you all of ideas. Sorry, excellent. Hit stop. What was that time? Public school system. Yeah, it gives you all of these ideas about yourself. Most of them negative. Most of

them limited. Beyond teaching you to read and write, like they get you into some sort of popular and not popular sort of pecking order. You get this, you know, you're sort of like, here,

here's a book read this learn this be tested on this and you start getting this idea that life is just a series of people older than you telling you to do shit that you don't want to do and you don't really get this thing in your head that um you know when you go out into the world you're free to do what you want to do and you're free to make like this decision. So one of the things that I got in my head was that I had an inability to learn another language. And what was really going on was, you know, was the beginning of my childhood trauma started affecting my grades. And I had like massive, massive, massive, massive ADD. Massive. Like, I remember it used to take me like 20.

minutes to read a page in a book it felt like everything that I was reading made me think of something else and for a long time I was like oh I just had like ADD I think a lot of my inability to focus had to do with a lot of the shit that happened to me that someday I don't know I've always wrestled if I would ever like really delve into that stuff um in some form um But I really feel like I want to because I know that that stuff continues to happen to kids and you get like this, just this negative sense of self. Because I can definitely tell you that the younger me never would have thought that I would be able to learn French. Never would have thought that I would be able to get through ground school, get a pilot's license.

never thought that I would have the courage to go on stage to to become a comedian never thought that you know all of this shit that I'm doing like I never I didn't think any of it was possible but fortunately I met a few people you know as I was just sort of ping pong and bouncing around in life that just somehow eventually led me into a comedy club and through stand-up comedy and doing well as a comedian, it gave me a belief system in myself and made me then look at the public school education

in a different light. And I discovered things like I enjoy reading, which is not something that you think going through the public school system when you're constantly told to read shit, you have no interest in whatsoever, especially, you know, when you're a kid and you're, you want to go run around and play sports and you become a teenager and you're falling in love and, you know, puppy love and all of that. Yeah, I want to fucking read Bale Wolf. What the fuck am I reading this

shit for? Hey, Bill, what did you think of that story? I fucking thought it sucked, you know? I took me like nine hours to read it. However, I can read the sports page in five seconds. And sports are not dumb. They're amazing. Sports are fucking amazing. And if you play sports, it's fucking amazing and what it does for you and what you learn and learning through winning and losing

and learning more through losing and how to pick yourself up and all of that shit. Fucking reading. That's the one that just stuck out. Where I just really felt like I'm just fucking dumb. That fucking bail wolf

I don't know who wrote it when it was super old And I and it's in this old fucking English And I'm just sitting there reading this shit Like I had a hard enough time reading modern English And I'm reading this shit I had no fucking idea what it's about And then I get tested on it And I flunk it

And then like they're you know They're calling your parents Because I don't understand a fucking story You know written Fucking a thousand years ago Like I'm going to go out in the world and have a job interview When the guy across me is going to be talking like William Shakespeare It was the stupidest fucking thing

Really dumb Anyway So don't give up on yourself Because of however you did in school Or whatever your pecking order was And fuck all of that stuff It's stupid. The whole thing is stupid And all of those people, you never see them again

And they have all of this influence on your life All right. Billy French question. Oh, Billy Baguette, reaching out with a French question. I recently started working for a French company. It's based in New York City, but I will have to go to France quite a bit, and about 50% of my colleagues are French. It is in the French alcohol industry. So there's a lot of popping into stores, bars, and restaurants when we go to France. Dude, I mean, that's what that country is. So much. much of their country is that. I mean, that's a dream job. The person says, I want to jump straight into what they all call table French to make this easier, basically not sounding like le Jacquesass in a bar at a restaurant, words for drinks, ordering all that crepe. But I don't want to get on the usual duolingo and do levels of.

of the cat knows a dog. I want to jump to this specific type of vocabulary because it's what I need to know the most, but then I can get into the rest from there. I do speak Italian fluently, so the structure of romance language is there for me. Also, I know the super basics already, numbers, colors, so I'm looking for tools slash resources to jump

right into this type of vocabulary. I figured you'd know all the good Mered, for this type of learning. Thank you very much, Billy Rouge. Well, you can speak Italian. How did you learn how to do that? You're actually beyond me because you're fluent in English and Italian.

So, all right, if you're ordering, I would go a Jev-Vardre, which means I would like. And then I would just, I would, you know, whatever types of restaurants you're going to, I would learn, I, like, how do you just, like, fucking jump in? If I walked into a French cafe, uh, bonjour monsieur, uh, I would say a cream cafe, uh,

with, I don't know, pan of chocolate. I don't know, you just jambo in his home, fromage's cheese, salad verd. Salad verd. I don't know, you just have to learn

Duvant. I'm trying to think. I'm a little rusty here. You just if you want, you know, La Mems shows means more the same you can point at your drink um an other civil play means another yeah i would i guess i

would just learn how to order i would i would maybe just get like a list of food and then a couple of phrases um i don't know that's a weird thing to do and but i would still be doing I would still be doing some sort of duolingo because you're going to need like all of like those connecting words. Like also the and some. Yeah, I don't know. I don't, yeah. I like duolingo. Duolingo is great.

I also read like French newspaper La Parisian and I, uh, listen to the radio over there. Isn't that Euro 1 channel? I don't know. I actually feel like I don't feel like I can help you. I feel you could help me. How do you speak Italian fluently? That's another.

I fucking love that language. I like Spanish. I like French. I like Italian and I was listening to this guy yesterday when I went out a couple days ago I took my son to the barbershop like he was speaking um I think Russian and that is just completely like you know where you hear like Italian French and Spanish there's a lot of overlap especially with Spanish and Italian from what I've heard but you can hear like okay these people grew up next near each other but when you hear russian

you're like okay this is like this was a world away you know before travel technology and all that if you live that far away from the mediterranean sea everything sounded like that different but i don't know i'm sort of obsessed with all of that stuff um but yeah i would just get some like phrases or whatever you're also going to be with like french people i would start talking to them in french trying to you know it's like learning an instrument and jamming with your buddy oh i play guitar too or i play bass i play drums and just i would start doing that before you get over there and i think you i think you'll pick it up pretty quick if you already speak two languages i feel like you probably have some sort of system unless you just grew up in a duolingo house so you

don't really remember learning English and Italian. It just was. But if you learned Italian after you learned English, or if you learned English after you learned Italian, I would think you have some sort of system. I would be interested in that. And if people out there have a system that are fluent, I would love to hear it. All right, when websites say they're out of the day, scrolled back up again. Yeah, I think that's the end of the questions, which will end up being the end of the podcast here, which is a little short. That's what she said, because I've been up all night now. Up all night, sleep all day, right? What band was that? That was right at the end. Right at the end of, oh, the band

begin with it. An S. Not savage, not sabotage. What the fuck was the name of that band? I don't fucking remember. That was like right at the end. I think like Jane's Addiction had already released two albums at that point.

Allison Chains was about to release their second one. Nirvana was about to come out sound garden was going to put out their second one um i don't sound garden out of all those seattle bands that's my fucking band sound garden is the fucking shit and i feel like they are they that was the best rock band of that era i would put i would put them up um as far as that style of music. I love Pantera from that era. It's going to make me go fucking out in my garage or go play drums at 4 in the morning. I can't do that. All right. I need to get sleep because my kid's going to be up soon. And I make breakfast. That's my job. I do the breakfast every morning

to earn my keep. All right. Everybody, have a wonderful Thanksgiving. I'm thankful for all you guys for listening to this podcast again this year. Everybody that came out to my shows, anybody that gave me any work and um you know anybody that came out to broadway this year um thankful for all my my experiences traveling and all of that going over to sada arabia the fall out of it and getting to be in a middle of one of those even that was fucking interesting and all of that fucking shit yeah it was

yeah it was a hell of a year and thankful for my lovely wife and my kids and all of this stuff I really have a great life and it's thanks to you guys for coming out to my shows

and listen to this so thank you from the bottom of my heart and with that go fuck yourselves have a great Thanksgiving and I'll check in on you on Thursday I guess on Thanksgiving. All right, when I go outside, walking past people hugging each other, crying, or whatever the fuck they're doing. All right, I'll see you.