Monday Morning Podcast - 'The Social Reckoning', the Blitzkrieg, Private Equity | Monday Morning Podcast 10-5-26

Episode Date: October 5, 2026

Bill rambles about 'The Social Reckoning', the Blitzkrieg, and private equity groups.SimpliSafe: Save 60% off w/professional monitoring when you visit http://www.SimpliSafe.com/BURRHims: Visit http://www.Hims.com/BURR for a personalized plan—for sex, hair, weight loss and moreSquarespace: Head to squarespace.com/BURR for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, use OFFER CODE: BURR to save 10% off your first purchase of a domainQuo: Try Gusto today at gusto.com/BURR, and get three months free when you run your first payrollSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr, and it's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday, October 5th, 2020. 6, 6. 6. What's going on? Awaiya. What is that? What is that fucking melody? Car 54, where are you? There it is. Old school fucking show. What's going on, man? Ah, Jesus. I just flew back. from fucking New York City, dude. I went out there and with my lovely wife and we went to, I'm doing a little promo here. All right? I'm selling out early.

I went out there for the premiere of the social reckoning and went to the thing, did the whole thing talk to people and saw the movie and I am so thrilled to be a small part of it. this thing, man, everybody just did such a great job. You know, I was only on it for like a week, but everybody else did like the

Mikey and Jeremy Allen White did all the fucking heavy lifting of the story. It's amazing. Another Aaron Sorkin classic. And old Freckles gets to be in it for a minute. In it for a minute. That's the name of my career. Anyway, so check that out. I believe it comes out October 9th.

and you're going to get your money's worth on that one, man. It's definitely one of those ones that I was like, I need to watch this again. There was one thing, I love subtle shit. You wouldn't know that because I'm such a loud idiot, but there's something really subtle in there. No spoiler alert here, but I'm going to wait to see if anybody, like, post about it, you know, and people post about movies and shit.

But anyway, moving on. Moving on, like the New York Yankees and not the Red Sox. Congratulations to the New York Yankees. And I got to give a shout out to Mike Francesca, Francesca, however you say his name. One of the great sports radio, you know, with an equally, you know, his sports career is equally as great as that head of hair of his.

So he was trashing the Red Sox, you know, he's a New York guy. So, you know, they're going to get into it with us whenever, because they finally beat us in the fucking playoffs, right? he goes like, you know, I'm sitting there watching it, and it's like nine to nothing, or whatever the fucking score was. And the red trucks, they go and they hit a home run, and then they put that stupid mascot head on, and they're celebrating.

It's just like, what are you doing? Right? I'm not going to lie to you. I agree with all of that. I don't understand any of that stuff, but also straight guys paint their fingernails now. It's just a different time. So he goes, he goes, if I was in that dugout, what did he say?

He goes, you'd have to stop me from, you know, beating somebody up or something like that, which I love that he said that. It's like, I didn't know he was, I thought he was Mike Francesca. I didn't know he was Mikey Hans. And I just loved the idea of him being in a dugout swinging on people, you know. Imagine if he kept his headphones on, you know, the ones that he had that go underneath him, underneath the chin, like he's. He's flying Eastern Airlines to go to Disney World like in 1975.

If he kept those on while he just swang away. Man, you'd have to hold me back is what he said, something like that. And then he goes, and at this point, I'm agreeing with all of this. It's like, yeah, I don't understand what are we doing here? What are we putting on the Oscar, the Grouch fucking mascot head on? 100% valid point. But then he goes, I mean, oh. It's just a state of baseball right now?

And once he did that, that's where he kind of lost me. It's like, all right, Mike, I will go with, like, I don't like that stupid celebration. Certainly, if you're about ready to get closed out in a playoff series and you score one measly running, you haven't done shit in two games, yeah, what are we doing? Doing the Soul Train fucking, you know, line or whatever.

I totally get all that. But to say what is going on, is just where, you know, baseball is, It's like, all right, well, then you got to keep going, Mike. You can't sit there and make fun of the Red Sox putting on the Oscar, the Grouch fucking head, and then simultaneously not look away while you watch the New York fucking Yankees shooting off champagne celebrating a, air quote, playoff series victory because they just won two games in a row against a third place team

that was 11 games out of first place. I mean, what are we doing here, Mike? Are we really going to act like that was a playoff team that you just beat? We're not going to sit here and just admit the fact that the divisional round of the MLB playoffs is nothing more than a cash grab. In what fucking world are you in third place

and in baseball? and you're double digits out of first place and you're shooting off champagne with goggles on in the end of September because you you you made the playoffs. I mean, it's a joke, okay? Like the MLB playoffs don't start, I don't think, until this round. I, like, the Yankees making the playoffs, four and a half games out. You know, they've had the wild card for a while.

That's fine. But like, in what world? you doubled 11 games out of first place. And you're celebrating anything. The Red Sox, okay, Mike, were not worthy of celebrating that you beat them. Okay, that was like fucking, that was a third place team

that is many moves away from making any sort of legit playoff run, okay? Like, we had one of our first, one of our worst first halves ever. If I got to remind the great Mike, Francesca of this. We had a magical July where we got hot and we won a bunch of games. How many of those fucking games did we win against future playoff teams? You're also in the regular season. So you're

feasting on a lot. Probably half those teams didn't even make the fucking playoffs. Although I don't know now if you're third place in your 11 games out and you still get invited to the dance. Yeah. And then we sort of came back down to earth in August and September as the sort of mediocre win some lose some team that we were we're not a playoff team we are like a couple two three moves that we have to do right to get to where the fucking i don't know to make it to an alcs at least so i don't know what the hell he's talking about going this is the day to baseball and it's just like well i mean if you guys can shake up champagne because you won two games in a row And that somehow gave you a playoff series victory.

If you guys can celebrate, yeah, beating a third place team, 11 games out of first place, why can't the other team put on a fucking stupid Oscar the Grouch head and do the Soul Train line? I don't get any of it, Mike. But like, let's not be a fucking a homer here. I even, I'm going to talk about some of these guys. Like, what's his face was going?

That guy from, what is it? Point counterpoint. Pardon the interruption. Tony Kornheiser goes like, you know, so much for the greatest baseball rivalry in sports, it's just like, Tony, it has ups and downs. It heats up, it cools off. Like, what are you talking about? You're watching a second place team play a third place team.

Yeah, it's not going to be as exciting. Beating the Yankees in the 80s was not an exciting thing to do. Beating them in the 70s, you were on the edge of your scene. beating them right through the early when they had like fucking Roy Smalley at the end of his career and

uh uh Bo Diaz who over that fuck they had they had that Cleveland catcher you know it just wasn't happening you know

but then once they got to the like you know the Derek Jeter years even then it was nothing until 99 like we were nowhere because it it has to be where

we're good and they're good and it fucking means something. Like I can say as a Red Sox fan, you know, beating the Yankees like, you know, Jeter retired, A-Rod's gone and all of that shit. Like, once all of those guys left, like, I can't, I know Aaron Judge. That's all I know right now, you know, which, you know, maybe you might consider put your names on the back of your uniforms and dropping your fucking arrogance that everybody knows who you are, because I don't know who the fuck they are. So anyway, just wanted to say,

say that. I fucking hate more people. What's going on with baseball? All you see is one side. I agree, Mike. It's fucking stupid to celebrate. But it's also just as dumb to be celebrating, beating a third place team. Eleven games out. Congratulations, man. You should have had a little fucking Canyon of Heroes parade. You won the divisional round of the playoffs. Anyway, plowing ahead here. I want to thank everybody. That came out to the shows that I did at the Chicago Theater and also all the people that came out in Battle Creek, Michigan. Like, dude, I had to move things around because that premiere.

So the Sunday show became Wednesday. So I went Chicago, Battle Creek, Michigan, and then two nights in Chicago. And I literally could not have had a better time. I got to do Eric and Dan Katz's show on Barclay. stool that'll be coming out next week and uh i was sticking up for drake may and the patriots saying what the fuck i was saying and guess who took the fucking pats yesterday and the points and why did i take it because i know football no because it made no sense the pats were we're only getting four and a half points going up against mighty josh allen and the buffalo bills now i know their defense lets up a lot of points and

shit, but like the way we looked, you know, the way the Jaguars just totally dominated us, I would have thought that that line would be at least five and a half, six. So I was like, I'm not jumping on that fucking hook. That one doesn't make sense. And you know what else doesn't make sense is the Raiders spread. So I took the Patriots and the Raiders this week because it made no fucking sense. and I won both of those picks. And I got to say, that's my new system.

That's my new system. When you see those spreads that don't make any sense, you're like, they fucking know something. I'm going up against a casino that has athletes on computers. They know something. There's something going on. The weather, a backup quarterback's coming in.

I don't know what the fuck is going on. But I'm not jumping. Like, it's just, remember when the cops had the trap car? It's just, they would, like, leave it running with the keys in it and go to some bad neighborhood where nobody had any money or hope. They finally made that shit illegal, right? And, yeah, there's a couple of those bets every year.

So that's my, that's, I got that one. And then my Thursday night thing is a Thursday night game between division rivals, If the underdog gets three and a half of more points, take the underdog. Because they only get a four-day rest, so the game plan is really simple. And it drags the better team down closer to the underdog. I think you would have won again this week. I believe it was, no, last week, Steelers Bengals that worked. I don't know if it worked this week.

I have no idea. But a bunch of crazy games. How about that fucking Pats game, that throw in the end, the fucking catch? It's amazing. Of course, my internet went out in the hotel. It just kept spinning with like four and a half minutes to go. And I kept resetting and kept going back. And they kept coming to that Bill's fan in the end zone,

slamming down on the wall. And I'm so stupid. It took me like a minute because I was getting ready to go to the premiere when this shit was happening. And I kept going like, why do they keep showing that fan? He must be like famous or something. And then I finally figured it out. It just kept stopping and resetting.

And so I missed it. live, all of a sudden I started getting the WTF all caps fucking text messages from all my buddies back home. And I knew that we won. I knew that something good happened. So whatever, whatever, we'll see. So we'll see what the spread is when the bills come back. Like there's no way we're going to beat those guys twice. But, oh, hang on. Hey, you know what? Sorry, I get distracted. today. And I'm back. You know what else? I loved about that

Mike Francesca going like, you would have had to hold me back or whatever the hell he said. You know what that reminded me of? Do you remember a long time ago when Larry Merchant was interviewing Mayweather after his fight? And Mayweather's like, whatever, Larry, you never liked me, blah, blah, blah. And then Larry Merchant goes, if I was 30 years younger, I'd kick your ass. I always love that. And I was just thinking,

you know what? I think Larry Merchant, if you went back 30 years, when Mayweather was like five, yeah, I think he could do all right against him. I love when old guys talk about fuck. I kicked a five. This was fucking nine presidents ago.

I'd give you the old fucking one. too. It's so great because you don't have to prove in any way, shape, or form that that's who you were when you were young. You just get to act like you were. Oh, let me tell you, I didn't take anything from anybody. Yeah, you did. We all do.

We all do. That's how you become an old man. If you fight every fucking fight, you don't become an old man. At some point, you just got to be like, yeah, man, you know, I believe you. Yeah, that's right, I'm a pussy. I'll see you later. I'm going to get in my car and drive away. Bye-bye.

You win. I don't care. Dude, I don't fucking care. Say whatever you want. The fuck you're going to do. Anyway, while I was in New York, I actually peeked into the Village Vanguard. I went down there to see...

I'm so stupid. I went in there to see if I could buy tickets. You know? Nobody sells tickets anymore. Everything's these fucking Internet. And then, like, I was in, uh, when I was in my hotel in Chicago, like, guys, can you guys do me a huge favor? Don't fucking scan QR quotes. If the whole herd does that, I'm not going to be able to do anything.

And because I'm not going to be able to leave the house because I'm not fucking doing it. They go into your phone. They go into your phone. They take all your contacts and they take all your photos. And you got photos of your kids in there. And there's a bunch of fucking weirdos out there. Just don't do it. don't do it

don't scan fucking QR codes it's it's unbelievable like the every fucking thing now is designed to just take away your privacy

and everybody I don't know everybody's just so fucking relaxed about it like you know what are you going to do with them I mean you know as long as you're not doing anything wrong

I don't give a fuck it's just like that's it every day just let them walk you another two feet towards your fucking demise. Anyway, I've been reading this book

that I picked up when I was in Chicago and went into this fucking bookstore. Believe it or not, they still have those. And I'm reading this book, Blitzed. Drugs in the Third Reich. I don't know. I say this guy's name. By Norman Oler.

I mean, it's just a whole new, I don't know what, perspective on the second world. war and Hitler as a drug addict. First of all, like the Blitzkrieg evidently was just the German soldiers gacked out of their fucking minds on meth and not sleeping for days and just floor, your foot to the floor, attacking with such swiftness and also completely 100% like erratic, like it didn't even make sense because they were on fucking meth.

So when France tried to cut off, when they went around them, when they tried to cut them off, like by the time they got there, they'd be like two hours late and they would just keep going. And then they just kept going, well, they can't keep going. They're going to outrun their supply line and then we'll be able to cut them. But the thing was, they were on meth. Like you don't sleep, you don't need food. They just, they were like fighting zombies.

And evidently, I looked beyond the book. because it's kind of just about the Germans' use of it. And, you know, Hitler's big thing was that he was, like, healthy. He was a vegetarian, and he didn't do any of these substances. And, of course, he, you know, they had all of these drug issues after World War I. When they signed the Treaty of Versailles, they were fucking embarrassed. They had to admit that they caused the war. They had to give up, like, ten different quadrants of their empire.

And spirits were low, and people were just doing opium and cocaine. I mean, it was fucking wild, man. The shit was wild over there. And they started putting meth and everything, like fucking boxes of chocolates. They have, like, in this book, they have, like, advertisements where the women were like, you know,

eat a couple of chocolates and you'll be excited about cleaning your house, you know? Just fucking gacked, right? And the Nazis, I guess, were against it, like, initially. And then, you know, they did the whole thing. They tried to blame all the drugs on Jewish people. You know, sound familiar. All the shit that we do over here, right?

CIA, let's crack go into the black neighborhoods. And then what do they do? They just fucking, they blame black people. Typical shit. Typical, stupid, racist fucking morons, right? And all designed to keep us fucking separated. So anyway, eventually, you know, Hitler got like this doctor

and eventually he got hooked on all of that shit. And as far as his book is claiming, like Hitler spent like the last three years of the war just in a complete drug haze and at the beginning of the day he would just get fucking shot up and he had this crazy relationship with this doctor where no one knew what he was doing and the doctor was just essentially

he was like he was buying up all these animal organs and then boiling them down into a paste and adding water and injecting them into Hitler was just like the malpractice was just off the chain and eventually Hitler got hooked on like, I think meth and cocaine. I'm about three quarters of the way through the book, but there's that famous assassination attempt that guy made when he went into the boardroom and he set the briefcase down

and what saved Hitler's life, they don't bring it up in the book. I saw it in a documentary. It was a really heavy table. And the guy set the briefcase down next to Hitler, but on the other side of like this support thing for the table that was completely solid that went from one side of the table to the other like perpendicular to hold it up

and because Hitler was on the other side of that it saved his life but he basically lost his hearing it burned all the hair off the back of his head like his ears were bleeding for days and they just kept shooting him up on drugs like it's like

it was like the end of the war last three years of the war he was living like the fucking you know that guy from Allison Chains, where Alison Chains, Lane Stanley was just in an apartment. This guy was just in a bunker.

A full-on fucking junkie. And he'd get all this horrific news and then he would just fucking, they'd swab cocaine in his nose because he didn't want to snort it because he didn't want to,

they felt like if you snorted it, you were addicted to it. This is pretty early on on these kinds of drugs, I guess. And, you know, you got to read the book. paraphrasing here. So he would then, you know, get like that cocaine high and it would feed like that megalomania that he was like invincible. And only the doctors like knew what they would, like this

doctor knew what the fuck he was doing. So everyone, you know, he had like this mythical thing that he was like the picture of health. Evidently Heil Hitler meant like health to Hitler or something. And they were amazed at his positive, upbeat thing and it kind of like added to like his mystique, but he was just fucking he was just gacked out of his fucking mind it's fucking insane and they were just sit in this bunker

and he would just be high on drugs all day and then they when the air raid sign as the allies got closer they had like a fake fog machine and they would just run it over the thing so the allies couldn't see to bomb it there and he was just sitting in there in a fucking cocaine, opium

this other shit that they had I don't know it was fucking insane who's fucking insane but you could get meth for and all the troops they gave it like this meth and they would fucking like fight they tried to say this one guy was up for 17 days I can't imagine

you would go insane and then they would just crash and have to sleep for fucking days and then the Russians would like regroup it was just fucking it was madness so then we found out that that's what they were doing so our troops went on meth

but they had amphetamines. And I started looking this up on the internet, and then I guess towards, when we got into Korea, then we were given our troops meth. It was just insane. So I was kind of looking up like after World War II when the troops came back and, you know, the war was over. And the army, we immediately stopped giving these people amphetamines.

they were totally addicted to them like what happened. And there's very little information, but I was able to find some like the troops came back to America, the ones that were addicted to amphetamines, they were like they crashed out. And then for a while, like there was some sort of inhaler that people were getting on the black market that had some sort of that type of drug

so they could continue to experience, as they said, the level of focus that they had while they were in battle. They missed the focus. Fucking wild. Book is wild. It's a couple hundred pages. It's a quick read.

You know, I got it a couple days ago. I'm probably going to finish it today. I got that book and then I got a book on the pandemic of 1918, which I'd never heard about until the one we went through a few years ago. And that one's pretty wild because it's the same thing. People just refusing to wear masks, not believing the doctors, thinking it was a conspiracy. see all the usual type of shit,

which brings me all the way back to this Facebook fucking movie that is just, like, I didn't even hear the Facebook files. Like, I think I was in my own my own bunker during that pandemic shit, and I missed all of it. And just the level of shit that was going on

on that site that they just looked the other way. And I'm really kind of like anticipating that you know, that people on that platform are going to turn it into a political debate, like the movie, Liberal Hollywood and blah, blah, blah,

and they're going to get us to do it. And people are going to fall for it. Rather than looking at them, that it's like, wait a minute, you knew that there was adults opposing his children, sending photos like this to other children, and you chose to do nothing? Like, what the...

It's really bad. It's really fucking bad. It's super dark. It's super fucking dark. And you watch, just, you know, as a spectator of... the madness that we're living and just watch how they spend this and they'll take no accountability um and these are the people also that sort of try to dictate where you focus all of your frustration

on the direction humanity's going in and they always point they make us look at each other and uh it's just more of that it's fucking wild it's wow but check out that book if you get a chance it's also a good way to get off goddamn social media man not fry your fucking brains um anyway all right let's let's move on here i have to do the uh i got to do the reads here for the fucking week oh geez oh yeah upcoming i got an upcoming show here october 17th i'll be headlining really co-headlining with uh the great tom sigora and rachel feinstein uh we will all be headlining the fastball comedy festival in mesa arizona at sloan park um as mentioned also on the show Tom Segoor and Rachel Feinstein

and the next night is Dave Chappelle and Andrew Santino single day and weekend tickets are available check it out. This is going to be my last I think road date of the year and then I'm just you know basically after you know this run here that I'm doing

promoting the movie I am I'm with the kiddos man oh fucking Billy slippers Anyway, so thank you guys again for another great year of travel around telling jokes. Dude, that fucking Battle Creek show, I cannot say enough about how much fucking fun I had with that crowd.

And they had, you know, it was coming up to the casino. And I got to promote this guy's show. Okay, in Battle Creek, Michigan, Engelbert Humperdink, I swear to God, is going to that casino. And when I saw the advertisement for him,

I go, that guy's still torn. And I literally go to club soda Kenny. I'm like, this fucking guy's got to be like 90 years old. And I looked it up. He's fucking 90 years old. You got to go. Dude, anybody, you're 90 years old. You're still doing the road.

Pats off to you. I don't know how the fuck you. It's amazing. You got to go see the guy. He had a, that song, Please Release Me, Let Me Go. It came out 60 years ago. He's still out there doing gigs.

You know, all of these fucking assholes on Instagram trying to tell you how to live healthy. And, you know, do this diet, do that diet, you know, fucking do these exercises. We got to find out what Engelbert Humperdink is fucking doing. This dude is crushing it. All right, plowing ahead here. Let's do the, let's do the,

let's do the reeds here for the week. The reads, the advertising. Oh, Simply Safe, everybody. You know, I used to think a camera or video doorbell was home security. Did I think that? I guess I did. I don't know.

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This podcast is sponsored or brought to you by Squarespace Domains. You know what? Fuck this shit. I'm just going to fucking, I'm going to stop reading four in a row. I don't know when it became four in a row. We're going to read a couple of reads, couple things from you, and then we're going to break it up a little bit, all right? Hey, hey, break it up.

Okay, baby, all right. Oh, Billy Bull Toker. What's up, Billy Bull Toker? I really relate to you. You're trying to kick weed, boo, cigars, et cetera, and bouncing from one to the other. We have Frank the Tank syndrome. You try to have one and things go off the rails. Absolutely. Your struggle reminded me of the movie Half Bake before everyone knew Bob Sagitt's comedy was actually quite dirty. Dave Chappelle says, I am here because I am addicted to marijuana,

to which Bob Sagitt replies, I used to suck dick for Coke. You ever suck dick for marijuana? Just those things coming out of his mouth were always fucking hilarious. It's weird how you have every intention of just a little here and there and then it's back on the wagon after things escalate.

Good luck with your abstinence and go fuck yourself. Yeah, I still haven't... I've been able to... I've been able to hold off. I got that thing... Yeah, I'm not like a go-to-meetings, you know? I lost my marriage and my car and I lost my teeth. Like, I'm not that level of an attic,

but I'm definitely on the fucking... you know, I don't have that ability, you know, I don't like lose, yeah, like I said, I'm a functioning fucking addict, you know, I just get into shit and like, that's what I do. So I just got to be careful. And I'm about three weeks into this shit. So it takes like a month to get all of it out of your system. And then they're like, even then you still might have, you know, a random night where you can't get to sleep and it's just like, dude, what the fuck are you putting into weed? Because I will say, my whole

life, I've been around people that smoked weed, you know, and I never, you know, I didn't try it until like my late 30s. But I remember when people saw a joint, they would just be like, hey man, can I get a hit off of that? And that was it. They just passed it and somebody took

a couple of toks. Hey, man, thanks, right? They left. There was never like somebody never handed you a joint and was like, hey man, be careful with that. I wouldn't do more than two hits. See how you feel. Like the only time anybody ever said that was if what you were smoking was not just weed, you know?

Anyway, plowing ahead here. Oh, Billy Bull to-oh. All right, I already did that one. All right. Good coffee shops. Oh, hey, Billy Joltjaw. I heard you say that you have trouble finding the good coffee shops

and cities you visit. Yeah, because if you look up like best coffee shops near me, you know, that's all, you know, these big companies like Blue Bottle, Pete's coffee, Starbucks. And it's so funny, they all get like 4.8 stars. And it's just all just,

they just burn their shit out of their beans. Some of them are just, they're not even coffee. It's just fucking chemicals. And you can't find like that one location mom and pop place. So I need to go to you guys that actually live in the neighborhood so you can tell me.

Person says, first things first, if you use Google Maps, look at the map and click around your area. Don't pay attention to the list which is usually sponsored spots like Starbucks. I hate to say it, but using GROK or ChatGPT is great for this.

You can say, find me the best independent coffee shop within a 10 to 15 minute walk or insert hotel. Really? They're not sell. I don't trust any of those things. I don't even trust that this fucking email

wasn't written by a robot at this point. You'll get a great list with descriptions of each spot and what they're known for. I only do it when I have to because I hate the AI space, but it works really well. Also, just ask someone at the front desk.

I did that shit. I asked the front desk. fucking door guy. I go, where's the best coffee? Right around the corner at the fucking hotel. And I go there and it's one of these Instagram places. And it's like, it's not a real fucking coffee shop to me if you serve coffee into go plastic cups to people who are staying there. That right there is the major red flag because you don't give a shit about microplastics being in your coffee. And all you're trying to do is like, we're not washing glasses

that's going to cost too much. Let's cut out the water bill and let's give everybody plastic cups that are going to go into the ocean and sit there for 900 fucking years. So fuck those people. I don't do any of that shit. Anyway, you can't trust people like that.

You got to find, like, I was hoping like you guys would tell me rather than you telling me to go on chat GPT. Anyway, he says, also asking us, someone at the front desk, unless you're staying at Motel 8's. No, it's Motel 6 or Super 8. The only person at the front should know, oh, the person at the front should know or can find out what the good spots are. Just trying to help you break out of your curse of making everything harder than it is. Oh, you're blaming me?

All, parentheses, your words about yourself, not mine. All right, I apologize. Look at me. Jump into fucking conclusions. that's so out of character for me thanks and go fuck yourself you know what I'm just going to start asking you guys beforehand before I go out somewhere but then even when I do that then I just get a bunch of wise ass responses

and everybody's trying to fucking you know be the wackiest person I don't know I'll start asking local comedians or whatever all right let me let me go back let's let's do a let's do the last two fucking reads mercifully all right square space everybody this sponsor this sponsor this podcast is sponsored to you by square space domains your domains come with everything included from the moment you register every feature every tool

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Try Gusto today at gusto.com slash burr and get three months free when you run your first payroll. That's three months for free at payroll at gusto.com slash burr. One more time, gusto.com slash burr. All right, see, that was a lot easier to do, for me anyways. All right, up is down. Up is down. Black is white.

Inside out and wrong is right. Back to the front of a little. Oh, my God, the kink song, Deep cut. Give the people what they want. Boo-do-do-do-du-do-bo-bo-bo. My favorite song on that was, uh, uh, uh, Do do do do do do no what was it?

No, uh, around the dial. Don't know what's been happening now that you've been gone. No, no, no. Think I'll sell my radio now that you're not on. You're my favorite DJ since I can't remember when. That's way back, man. I remember I bought that in like Jake Isles' freeze frame, police ghosted the machine.

It was that year. Remember that year? He had a crushing some girl and turns out she was a centerfold and a fucking porno magazine That was a fucking wild song. All right, up is down, down is up. Hey, Bill, notice how these days

you can just say whatever you want without shame. The last 20 years feels like one big sigh op to destroy common sense. PSY dash op. There are some obvious mainstream bending opinions

if you get my gist, i.e. dudes and chicks and whatnot, but whatever the case may be, that's not the topic I'm bringing up. Good, because I don't know what you're talking about right now. I think you're saying shit be crazy. There's this case where a guy was jacking off in a park near kids. All right, this got dark quick.

The state attorney claimed that he was not doing anything illegal. Well, that's one of the fun things about being a court-appointed lawyer. You can't pick your cases. and your job is to come up with the defense. Anyways, okay, well, what's left, Bill? We can't even all agree that jerking off in public, let alone in front of kids in a park, is illegal. So the state attorney on the case says he can't prosecute the man.

Oh, this is the prosecution? Even though it is a felony and he absolutely can and should. To top it all off, that attorney's boss went up at a podium and defending that lack of prosecution. Imagine if you said it was okay to jerk off in public with a straight face. Dude, are you sure that that wasn't some fucking clickbait? You'd be lambasted, and your only solution would be to run for office like this bitch.

Love the podcast. Could I get some more fucking details on that? Because that made no damn sense. All right, let's, oh, geez, this is a long one. Oh, geez, a little war in peace here. All right, what have we got here? More info on youth sports. Oh, yeah, my kids are getting into sports now,

so everybody's warning me about how kids' sports and the fields and the ice rinks are all taken over. I mean, you know the deal. You can't just fucking get your kids involved in sports. That also has to be totally just a soul-sucking fucking financial fuckover. They just can't leave anything alone. All right, so here we go. More info on this shit.

Here we go. This is going to depress the shit. Dear Billy Old Man, parentheses, old man instead of the kid. Oh, oh, dear Billy the Old Man, instead of Billy the Kid. Very long-time listener, first-time writer. I listen to your words of wisdom to and from work and love every minute of it. Words of wisdom. Jesus.

He's sending you some fucking money for gassing me up here. listening to your podcast and someone wrote in about the corruption of youth sports and hockey. Shockingly, I was on my way to meet a buddy after work for some drinks and his son is very deep into the traveling hockey thing. So I thought I'd ask him about it, maybe get some insider information. Firstly, my buddy spends a stupid amount of money for his son to travel and play hockey. I mean, absolutely ridiculous amount, but he's well off so his family can afford it. Every time I talk to him he's telling me he's got to go to another state for the weekend and get a hotel so his son can play he also takes some of his teammates with him to help other kids get to play too the kids have a blast

but it's a lot on my buddy yeah why don't you just if you get the money starts your own fucking league for everybody there you know let's we'll just do a regular one let me guess they own the rinks and they won't allow it there's only one you know we have the fucking we are the live nation kids fucking hockey thing. It's so ridiculous. Anyway, we start chatting and I asked if he heard of Big Bear and his eyes got all big and says, those motherfuckers and shakes his head. The corruption is worse than I thought from what your listeners wrote in.

Listener wrote in. Okay, oh my God, here we go. Oh, it's getting deep here. First thing he tells me is all these indoor rinks used to have a live streaming service. Cost $9 a month and the quality was great for parents and relatives to watch. Their kids play when they couldn't travel. That's awesome. Well, when Bear came in, they immediately got rid of the live stream service

and replaced it with their own. He said it cost $12 a game and the quality is much worse. So my buddy, being the good guy he is, started a YouTube live stream, started to YouTube live stream the games himself. He also did the commentary like a live NHL game and had fun with it.

Yeah, it's supposed to be fun. He gets like 30 people watching it. Everyone wins. Wrong. Bear found out and shut down his YouTube. And here's the thing. How do they have the fucking money and influence to shut down a YouTube channel? He also told me if people in the stands pull out their phones to video their kids during the games,

the people working there would tell them to put their phones away. Like you're at a live comedy special or something. They want you to use their streaming service only. It's crazy. He told me there's a bunch of lawsuits against Bear, and I hope it all works out. It's kids having fun, not professional sports. Yeah, I feel like there's going to be a major pushback on all this.

I feel like this AI fear and all of this shit. It's just a real estate bubble. It's all going to come crashing down. Somebody was telling me the other day, the reason why these guys are all saying, this needs to be regulated because we can't even fucking control it because they want the government to come in and step in because they're all about to lose their asses.

and then it'll be government funded and all of that. Anyway, this person says, once you're done and off your soapbox about the continued awful corruption in this country, I just wanted to say thank you. I too am an old dad, not as old as you, though, and your two kids are a little bit older than my two. From all your other stories, we had a similar coming up, and I was nervous about the kind of dad I would be,

but you made it seem easy to break the cycle and just be a good dad. So thanks. Oh, dude, that made my fucking day. All the best to you and the family. Go fuck yourself, you wonderful fuck. Well, you're a wonderful fuck too if you broke the cycle or at least try, at least acknowledge it, try to improve on it and shit.

I will say, you know, a way to healing from your past is not to go into your past. Go into the future, have some kids, and you get to raise them the way you wish you were raised. You get to put them in an environment in an environment you wish you did. You know, I'm not coming down on the people that raised me or anything like that. I'm just saying, you know, the way shit was, you know, especially now it's weird because people keep going like, you know, what's the fucking 80s? Oh, dude, the 70s or the 90s, these were fucking great. It was just like, you know, it was far as like the level of technology and like surveillance and no internet. That part was great.

But there's way more information today about, you know, how to recognize, you know, toxic people and all of that. Like, you know, we all got them. And I got them in my life. I had somebody, you know, fucking reach out to me when, when, all right, dude. Get off your fucking horn. You know, I had something like, this is, I got somebody like in my fucking business life that, like, fucked me over. And it's just like, yeah, dude, you fucked me over.

The trust is over. It's done. Like, in this, this just happens in business. right? And this guy like does not live in reality. Like I find with a lot of toxic people, when you finally call them out on their behavior and you just don't let them do their tricks to try to make it somehow your fault that you're overreacting or whatever, whatever the fuck it is they try to do or try to say, you know, however you're viewing it, you're not viewing it correctly and they, and they're, you know, you're misconstruing this somehow, right?

once you like just put up these firm boundaries they still every once in a while they circle back and they see if they can get back in again to victimize you again or start it back up again or they've worn out everybody in their life and now the new people that were in the life are done with them so now they're just fucking yeah they're coming back to you like an old girlfriend like hey can I victimize this person again right and their big move is they come back and they just like hey man you know hey man they just act like like nothing like it's all fucking good and then like if you have like this like dude what the fuck are you talking to me for then they go like oh geez whoa gee what what they they try to turn it back around on you so i've really developed this skill

now like i just you know the boundary's there and you know all of a sudden they go hey man you know congrats on the movie or whatever the fuck they say. I just reaffirm like, hey man, just reminding you last time we talked, you did this, this, and this. So that's why we're not talking. So, yeah, you know, stop texting me.

And also don't act like that other shit, you know, didn't happen or whatever. I'm kind of paraphrasing, but you kind of have to do that with people. So, you know, and I know this shit now, because that information is out there. So it's like, today is not all bad. And yesteryear wasn't all great.

There was great shit from the past. And there was horrible shit. So you bring the great shit. You get rid of the horrible shit. Same thing with like right now. But I will say, one of the great things about having a kid is you get to heal through not doing to them what was done to you. So there you go.

There's one to grow on. All right. And with that, go fuck yourselves. And I'll check it on you on Thursday.