Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin - Does It Pay to Be a Reality TV Show Villain?

Episode Date: January 14, 2024

Originally aired 05.16.23 You know the old cliche “there’s no such thing as bad press?" Well, that’s easy enough to say, but it’s another thing to live it. Just ask Kara Alloway. Kara was brought onto the show The Real Housewives of Toronto, and quickly became the villain. Or, as she says, the anti-hero (cue Taylor Swift). Today, Kara tells Nicole how she got cast in this villain role, how it affected her, and how she looks back on it now. Want the kiddos in your life to become money masters? Check out Greenlight, the best money app and debit card for families (and get one month free!): http://greenlight.com/moneyrehab Investors: want to get a 1% bonus on your investments? Check out our sweet deal with Robinhood at http://robinhood.com/mnn  Is mental health a resolution for 2024? Get 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp at: http://betterhelp.com/moneyrehab  Want one-on-one money coaching from Nicole? Book a meeting with her here: intro.co/moneynewsnetwork 

One of the most stressful periods of my life was when I was in credit card debt. I got to a point where I just knew that I had to get it under control for my financial future and also for my mental health. We've all hit a point where we've realized it was time to make some serious money moves. So take control of your finances by using a Chime checking account with features like no maintenance fees, fee-free overdraft up to $200, or getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit. Learn more at Chime.com slash MNN. When you check out Chime, you'll see that you can overdraft up to $200 with no fees. If you're an OG listener, you know about my infamous $35 overdraft fee that

I got from buying a $7 latte and how I am still very fired up about it. If I had Chime back then, that wouldn't even be a story. Make your fall finances a little greener by working toward your financial goals with Chime. Open your account in just two minutes at Chime.com slash MNN. That's Chime.com slash MNN. Chime. Feels like progress. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancorp Bank N.A. or Stride Bank N.A. Members FDIC. SpotMe eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Boosts are available to eligible Chime members enrolled in SpotMe and are subject to monthly limits. Terms and conditions apply. Go to Chime.com slash disclosures for details.

I love hosting on Airbnb. It's a great way to bring in some extra cash, but I totally get it that it might sound overwhelming to start or even too complicated if, say, you want to put your summer home in Maine on Airbnb, but you live full time in San Francisco and you can't go to Maine every time you need to change sheets for your guests or something like that. If thoughts like these have been holding you back, I have great news for you. Airbnb has launched a co-host network, which is a network of high quality local co-hosts with Airbnb experience that can take care of your home and your guests. Co-hosts can do what you don't have time for, like managing your

reservations, messaging your guests, giving support at the property, or even create your listing for you. I always want to line up a reservation for my house when I'm traveling for work, but sometimes I just don't get around to it because getting ready to travel always feels like a scramble, so I don't end up making time to make my house look guest-friendly. I guess that's the best way to put it. But I'm matching with a co-host so I can still make that extra cash while also making it easy on myself. Find a co-host at Airbnb.com slash host. I'm Nicole Lappin, the only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand. It's time for some money rehab. You know the old cliche, there's no such thing as bad press? Well, that's easy enough to say it's a whole other thing to live. But Cara Alloway has lived it. Cara was brought onto the show The

Real Housewives of Toronto, yes, that franchise is global, who knew, and quickly became the villain, or as she would say, the anti-hero. To be honest, I've never seen the series, so I'm not exactly sure why or how she picked the short end of the shero stick, but as you're about to hear, I recently met her and I found her to have absolutely zero villain qualities. She has a novel coming out soon, Most Hated, and seeing her press tour honestly made me wonder if The Real Housewives is a great launchpad for a lucrative career. But as you're about to hear, stories like these are never black and white. So to add the color, here's my conversation with Kara. Kara Alloway, welcome

to Money Rehab. Well, thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be here. I'm excited to talk to you about your debut novel, Most Hated, comes out May 30th. Congrats. I assume, Kara, this is all inspired by your season on The Real Housewives of Toronto, yes? Yes, your assumption is correct. However, that being said, I always knew I wanted to write a novel that dealt with female relationships. I told my husband, there's a novel inside me. I knew it was going to deal with females and female relationships. I just didn't know what the backdrop was. Then I did Housewives. And I have to tell you, I knew I had found my backdrop. I instantly said, this is great. Because while the novel and the narrative of the novel, it is a fiction, it's not a calculated tell all,

it's not a biography or autobiography. I cast the reality show within the pages. So there are no characters that are similar to any housewives past or present, but I knew that, you know, the narrative, I wanted to grip what it is that fascinates us about female relationships because women are, you know, very much relational creatures. And I think the world loves to watch those relationships play out. I think we see that all the time in reality television.

I mean, you know, talk about the Scandival, the Tom Sandoval incident from LVP. How much do we love watching how these females interact with each other? Yeah, the guys are there too, but it's the women. So it was inspired and informed. A lot of the characters informed by the emotions I felt when I was cast as the villain for all intents and purposes. I prefer anti-hero, but cast as the villain on Toronto Housewives, a lot of what I went through there informed the characters. Were you cast as the anti-hero or is that just what happened? In the description of your book, it says, Alloway brings readers the inside perspective of someone who has been the reality TV villain and survived. So let's go there. How did you

first realize that you were the villain slash antihero? Really interesting way that I arrived at that. So I had the privilege of sitting in with Jonathan Murray, who is, you know, the godfather of reality television. He did the real world. He did the simple life. I sat in on Jonathan Murray is going to tell you how to cast reality television. It was a fascinating session. There were maybe 10 of us in this class and he went through, you know, how he cast, what he looks for, what he looks for in a villain, what he looks for in a cast member. And something that stood out to me, because this was post Housewives. So something that stood out to me was he said, make sure your villain has an incredibly high emotional intelligence. So I'm taking my notes. Okay. Make sure villain emotional,

high intelligence. Then I thought, you know, we did a psychological assessment before the show actually filmed. So I contacted the firm that had done this psychological assessment. And at the time, it was a very in depth one. I mean, it was three hours of would you rather this or this? And how does this make you feel? So I contacted the firm and I asked if I could see my psychological assessment. And I will say this, I've spoken with Housewives from other franchise and not every franchise across the board does the psychological assessment,

but of a lot of reality television shows do. So I asked if I could see mine. Line one, Kara Alloway has a very high emotional intelligence. So was I cast as the villain? Maybe not. Did producers see this and have a clue and say, okay, potential villain, definitely a truth teller, unfiltered, you know, I ticked all the boxes for villainhood. So I read that you first knew you'd be the villain when you

saw that the women in the cast were literally betting against you. For our listeners who haven't seen the show, can you tell us that story and how it came to that point? You know, can I just say it's still when you talk about it, it gives me goosebumps because it was such a Mean Girl Cafeteria episode. So we were all having lunch together. It was a group lunch. And these group lunches, you have to understand, you see them on camera for maybe two and a half minutes. The reality is you're filming for closer to two, maybe three hours. So you're sitting there. They want to take you in at different angles. They have different beats.

They want to hit. Production is coming in, you know, giving little people hints, showing phones. Can you talk about this? Can you talk about this? You're sort of sitting there. What's next? What's next? You're mic'd up.

I mean, the adrenaline, the anxiety is very high so a producer said to me at some point I'm going to need you to take a cast member he specified who that I was having issues with and I want you to do the classic may I speak to you alone which is like so it was such a cliche exactly and I was like okay so I took her and we went outside to talk about some issues that we were having. And they filmed us doing that. And then, you know, we did what we had to do when we were coming back to the table. So I walked back to the table where the rest of my cast was sitting. And as I was going to my place, I saw a pile of money.

I want to say they were $20 bills, but it was very obvious. It was a pile of money at the corner of the table. And20 bills, but it was very obvious. It was a pile of money at the corner of the table. And I sort of walked by and looked and I went, why is there money on the table for a lot of reasons? I mean, first of all, you never pay for the lunch. So I didn't know why anybody brought money. And this was well into filming. So I was sort of like, what's going on here? So I said, oh, there's money on the table. And they sort of looked at each other and giggled a little. And they're like, yeah, we kind of had a group bet I said what was that about and

they said well we bet if you guys got physical she'd take you down and I can't tell you how that felt like in so many ways I was gutted it undid me and I had to sit there and do the rest of the scene acting like never let them see you sweat. But I was gutted by that. However, thank you very much to the Mean Girls because it did give me my line, which was don't bet against Kara Allaway because you'll lose. Well, it's interesting that you liken this to Mean Girls. Obviously, we've all seen Mean Girls. I've seen it more times than I care to admit. But you say that you have a theory when you think of Mean Girls uh who's the first person that pops in your head Regina George like do you remember Katie yes she was in it but everybody remembers Regina George so do you think there's really no such thing as bad press at that point did you just lean into this anti-hero villain role so I think

what's important in this in considering this is I went into Housewives, I approached the production company with an idea for a reality television show, I wanted to produce a show that was sort of like million dollar listing, but for charity. And they said, you know, we'll think about it. And we talked about it, we waxed back and forth. And then they came back to me and they said, Kara, listen, we're doing Real Housewives of Toronto we think you should do the show and it could be a sizzle reel you can be the one that does all the charity events and that's a sizzle reel for your show at the time my working title was Sweet Charity that can be a sizzle reel for Sweet Charity now I was naive and I had no clue so I didn't really think but wait I don't want to be in the show I want to

produce the show I was thinking oh sizzle good Then I can have my show with my show will go into production. Also, I was a child actress. I enjoyed performing. I enjoyed being in front of the camera. So, you know, it was very appealing to me in that sense, really appealing to me. So with that producer mindset, I went into it thinking, well, we have to make this the best show ever, because I need my show to come out of this. So I was, you know, come on, guys, like, let's make this great. If they need conflict, let's give them the conflict we need. I was, you know, all in there. I had no clue that I was going to be the villain. Honestly, I went in thinking, you know, in my novel, I actually refer to the very feeling that I had,

which was, we were doing scenes. And all along, I saw myself as being the gym helper in these scenes. I was like, I'm in the office, and I'm the one doing the side eye at the camera, like, are you seeing this? Do you see what's going on here? I thought I was the normal one. And then all of a sudden, it started to turn. And I was like, wait a second. I don't think I'm the normal one. I think I'm that one. So did I embrace it? A hundred percent. Case in point.

We all were scheduled to do, to ride on a water banana, an inflatable up at my summer home on the water. That's reality TV for me. Of course. And so many cliches that could be thrown around. So in my interview post facto, I ended up breaking two ribs because of that water banana ride. We were thrown off it. Not fun.

But in my post facto interview, production said to me, why did you choose to take them on a water banana ride after I had a dinner party that went wrong? Well, it's like improvisation. I can't say because you guys planned it three weeks in advance schedule, but that's not allowed. You can't say no like that. You can't call out bluff. So thinking on the spot, I said, well, they got so blind drunk at my cottage and they were so hideously behaved that what's the best way to exact vengeance? Take them on a water banana ride, which in my head I was going, see, I'm producing. I'm giving you what you need. Meanwhile, people watching the show were going, she's the worst. She's so evil. How could she do that? So there's really no backtracking. A couple of times when we were filming, because I really was the lightning rod, I was the lightning rod of the show. So I had had it towards the end. We were on a boat and I said, that's it.

Today when we're filming, I'm not saying anything. I'm going to be quiet. I've been injured. I'm not going to say a word. So we sat around and literally I was watching the action go on. And I thought, I've just changed the channel on my own show. This is boring. I can't have this. So I went, all right, here she comes. She's coming out again. Bring her out.

And forgive me, I haven't seen the show. We've had awesome housewives on the show. I haven't seen one episode yet, but I get the gist of it. I will probably have to look up the banana boat scene. But that story about the producers telling you that they would feature your charity, I'm assuming that didn't happen in the show? No. So incubate your charity idea. It's interesting what happened. So they did know it didn't happen within the confines of the show? No. So incubate your charity idea. It's interesting what happened. So they did know it didn't happen within the confines of the show. After the show, I went to Los Angeles, I got my own agent to represent me as a producer. I got my show, we did a sizzle reel,

it had a happy ending in that sense. But in the confines of the show, what was interesting, and you're the first person that asked me this, it's a really interesting question. So I was selling tickets to this children's charity. That was my MO. That was my role. It was called the Ambie Gala. And I was supposed to sell tickets. A table was $25,000. But, you know, not to kill the casting or how the show was cast, that shouldn't be a problem. If you're a housewife, you don't blink at $25,000. how the show was cast, that shouldn't be a problem. If you're a housewife, you don't blink at $25,000. Unfortunately, every single one of my castmates was like, are you absolutely crazy? I'm not paying $25,000 for a table. So that portion never aired. But the trajectory of the narrative became, oh, she's awful. She's so mean to these people. And she wants them to go to her charity. And I can remember I kept saying, no, they called it my party. She wants them to go to her charity. And I can remember I kept saying, no, they called it my party. She wants them to go to her party. I was like, it's a charity. And I kept saying my line that was like so redundant was, it's not about me.

It's about the kids. And the other cast members would say, you want us to come to your party? And I was like, guys, it's the greater good. So that was awesome. Really interesting question. Thank you for allowing me to air that because I never got a chance to share that. I'm really glad. It's funny I ask you this because I recently had people reach out to me. And by the way, I say this on the show often that the DMs I get are like nerdy finance questions, not fun, sexy DMs. But I was recently asked about a reality show that some entrepreneurs were approached to do.

And they were like, can I send you the contract? I want to make sure that I'm doing everything right. I'm like, sure. But your guess is as good as mine. Get an agent, get a lawyer. What would be the cautionary tale of what they promise you versus what actually happens? Where should you be aware, if anyone? Because there's a writer's strike going on. So there's probably going to be more reality television. Reality television was born at the last writer's strike. So if anyone is thinking about getting in the space, what would be the lessons you would give them? Reality television is not for the faint of heart. That participant contract is a lot. I mean, at first, my husband said, like, well, you go do what you want to do.

But I'm a lawyer for the banks in Canada, it doesn't get more serious than that. I mean, he still wears a gown when he goes to court. Okay. So he said, I will not be participating in your Real Housewives franchise. The first night I came home, and he was asleep after doing a group event. I went, wake up, wake up, wake up. You've got to be on this show with me because otherwise, I have no one on my side. He was so reluctant. Okay, but the husbands very often sign a contract that promises to put them quotes in the best light. So even if they do something that'll be edited out, if they do something that's questionable, they will be shown in the best light if that's the contract they're signing the contract the participants sign i mean boy oh boy all bets are off so my husband used to joke saying honey in the bacon and egg breakfast i'm the chicken you're the pig sorry i mean i'm assuming they say like you'll be shown in the worst light as the participant so it's pretty much like that

like if you are injured we'll call the ambulance, but you know, we're going to keep filming. Okay. Was there a leeway for you? Did you negotiate through that? There is, there is little to no room for negotiation, which I also touch on in the narrative of my book. I mean, it is what it is. Like I say, it's not for the faint of heart. And you have three boys, right?

Did they have to sign a contract like that? Yes. So again, my family was very supportive of me. Hey, mom, we know this is what you want to do. My little one who he was in the union, you know, he was an actor, he was a voice actor. No, I don't do reality television. Mom, I'm a high school student in grade nine. And I don't want my friends actually, he might have even been in, maybe he was even in grade seven at the time, actually. So he was not having anything to do with it the other two one was in university and said if I want a social life I'm not doing this and then so nobody was doing it and then mom had to come to them and say guys please like I need some representation on this none of my girlfriends wanted to do it I had helped with casting of the show and I put a lot of their

names forward and they some of them did go to the interviews but I had helped with casting of the show and I put a lot of their names forward. And they some of them did go to the interviews, but either they didn't have the TV queue or when they found out what was involved, they said, no, no, no, no, no, no. I won't be participating. I mean, Toronto is we are the most multicultural city in the world, but we are also uber, uber conservative, just in the sense that, you know, we celebrities like to come here because Torontonians don't stop them on the streets and bug them. We're really, we keep our skeletons in our closet, deep in our closet. Except on The Real Housewives, I suppose. I mean, I commend you. I would have done the same thing to try to stack the deck in my favor and like put in, you know, my biggest fans, my biggest girl ambassadors. But I guess the biggest lesson net net here is that you just have no control, absolutely zero control of what's

going to be shown. Precisely. And I can remember, I thought Pride comes before a very big fall. I thought I had been around filming. I had friends who were on the Beverly Hills franchise. I know what's involved. I've got this. I'm going to be very careful of what I say. I'm going to choose my words so carefully. And we were filming a scene where I was walking into a restaurant and I had on some really high heels and they were giving me direction. You know, the cameraman has to walk backwards filming you. So can you take it slow so he doesn't trip and break his neck? And I, you know, of course, but walking slow and high heels, I was like teetering a little. And I laughed when we were doing a second take of this. I said to the cameraman, okay, you got to walk a little faster because I'm teetering. And I think I look like

I'm drunk. And he went, oh, well, don't worry about it. We'll speed your walk up in the edit. And that was when it hit me. And I thought, well, what do you mean you'll speed my walk up in the edit? I thought I had everything under control. I was going to be so careful of what I said. What do you mean you'll speed my walk up in the edit? I thought I had everything under control. I was going to be so careful of what I said. Never for a minute did I contemplate the edit. And that's where the Frankenbiting, the cherry picking comes in. One of my most dramatic scenes is me coming to the defense of my kids.

And I say, which is a line that I say all the time. If you're a friend of mine, you know I say this. I'm a little kooky and my family rolls their eyes. But I say, you know, come after me. I'll stand by own, come after my kids, and you will see flames shoot out of my nose. That's what I say. Well, that in the edit became come after me, awkward, edit, awkward edit, and flames will shoot out of my nose. I mean, even in the edit, it's it's so choppy. Yeah, so that's what came out. And again, I need to say, you're dealing with a singular production company. When you deal with experts like Alex Baskin, 32 Flavors, Truly Original, Shed, all of those

ones, they don't do, I've talked to other housewife participants, they don't do that sort of monkey business shenanigans. I remember someone from Beverly Hills said one time they did, they cut to a funny reaction that didn't go with the question that was asked, but that's it. Like, I mean, some of the girls get tripped up and say, you can say, I will always be aware I'm mic'd. I mean, you're wearing a mic pack, a belt. You've got this wire up through your blouse. I will know I'm mic'd. Oh no, you forget. Let me tell you, you forget. And you say things and sort of go, oh, crap. Did I just say

that? Oh, shoot. Okay. I mean, I'm getting anxiety just hearing you talk about this, so I can't even imagine. Hold on to your wallets. Money Rehab will be right back. One of the most stressful periods of my life was when I was in credit card debt. I got to a point where I just knew that I had to get it under control for my financial future and also for my mental health. We've all hit a point where we've realized it was time to make some serious money moves. So take control of your finances by using a Chime checking account with features like no maintenance fees, fee-free overdraft up to $200, or getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit. Learn more at Chime.com slash MNN. When you check out Chime,

you'll see that you can overdraft up to $200 with no fees. If you're an OG listener, you know about my infamous $35 overdraft fee that I got from buying a $7 latte and how I am still very fired up about it. If I had Chime back then, that wouldn't even be a story. Make your fall finances a little greener by working towards your financial goals with Chime. Open your account in just two minutes

at Chime.com slash MNN. That's Chime.com slash MNN. Chime feels like progress. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancorp Bank N.A. or Stride Bank N.A. Members FDIC. SpotMe eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Boosts are available to eligible Chime members enrolled in SpotMe and are subject to monthly limits. Terms and conditions apply. Go to Chime.com slash disclosures for details. I love hosting on Airbnb. It's a great way to bring in some extra cash. But I totally get it that it might sound overwhelming to start or even too complicated if, say, you want to put your summer home in Maine on Airbnb, but you live full time in San Francisco and you can't

go to Maine every time you need to change sheets for your guests or something like that. If thoughts like these have been holding you back, I have great news for you. Airbnb has launched a co-host network, which is a network of high quality local co-hosts with Airbnb experience that can take care of your home and your guests. Co-hosts can do what you don't have time for, like managing your reservations, messaging your guests, giving support at the property, or even create your listing for you. I always want to line up a reservation for my house when I'm traveling for work, but sometimes I just don't get around to it because getting ready to travel always

feels like a scramble, so I don't end up making time to make my house look guest-friendly. I guess that's the best way to put it. But I'm matching with a co-host, so I can still make that extra cash while also making it easy on myself. Find a co-host at Airbnb.com slash host. And now for some more money rehab. You were referring to the housewives of Beverly Hills. Brandi Glanville has come on Money Rehab. I know you recently did her show. She's awesome. She helped us pull back the curtain a bit on how much the Housewives cast members make

when she came on the show. And as a money nerd, I find it so, so fascinating to follow the money trail of the Housewives. How much did you make on the Housewives? I'm embarrassed to say, OK, Toronto is a little low budget, right? Like our, our athletes, our professional athletes don't make as much as the American ones. I was 25,000. For the episode? Nope.

Oh, for the season. I know exactly. Oh, American franchise. I'm telling you. Oh, budget again. I didn't do it for the money. I did it because I thought it was leading to something else. But I know how much they're paid on the US franchise. And I know when you say

an episode, that's, you know, yeah. That's kind of how much they make an episode in the States, right? Not all of them. I'm not at discretion to say from the ones I know. But I'm not at discretion to say from the ones I know, but let's just say that for the big ones, they make more than that. A lot. Is it negotiable? Did you try to negotiate that rate? It's non-negotiable. Did I try to negotiate it? Absolutely. And there were other, I know there were other potential cast members in Toronto that held out that said, I won't do it for a penny less than this. And production went, okay, then you're not doing it. And they were outraged that they weren't invited to do it. But again, production sort of said it's cachet. And I have to say, you don't do it for the money you do it. Number one, if you my brand that I was looking to sell was cherry, I was selling charity, that was my brand. But you do it if you do have a brand, a line of makeup, a line of clothing, whatever it is that you're looking to sell. You do it for that.

And then also, I have to say, a huge part of it that I know my friends in the States especially, the free stuff. I'm sorry to tell you this, but the free stuff is off the chart. Don't be sorry. Tell me more. Oh, there are housewives that want to buy second houses to hold all of their free stuff it comes daily it is incredibly plentiful and it's you know it's looking for just a shout out on social media and then of course there's after while the show is airing and whatnot there's the great endorsement deals there are managers and their only business is to get you that endorsement deal from, you know, usually it's a little off brand, like it might be something

like an instep for a shoe or something like that, or a drug company for you know, I know one of the housewives, I think she did something for drops for dry eyes or something like that. Like Chanel is not knocking on the door saying, will you be our brand rep? But it's lucrative and it's a side hustle. And that's what you do it for. What kind of stuff did you get? What was the coolest stuff you got? Okay, this is going to sound crazy, but I got a lot of good food from local, you know, local bakers and things like that.

That would, you know, say, can we have your address? We want to send you over some cookies. We want to send you a cheesecake. like that was kind of really fun I got a ton of hair accessories like a ton of hair accessories and makeup did any of them turn into bigger brand deals for you or did you not want to play in that party I didn't want to play in that party I was you have to understand I licked my wounds for mean, I didn't even get around to start writing the book, I was having post traumatic stress for several months. And let me explain. Also, for my own responsibility, I went into this being a huge pleaser. And I was under the impression that, you know, I was so sweet, I was a pleaser, I just wanted everybody

to be happy. And what I learned over the arc of the show is there's a ton of vanity tied up with being a pleaser. You can say you just want everyone to be happy and you want to be Snow White with the little birds on your shoulder. But at the end of the day, you want people to like you. And I had to come to terms with that. What is that like sex in the city line that Samantha says, if I care about what every bitch in New York City

thought about me, I'd never leave the house. I love that. That's a good one. I'm assuming people also sold a lot of that stuff as a side hustle. They do. I know for a fact they do because sometimes when you're sent products for promotion, they send you 10 or so and I can spot them on eBay. I know on eBay. I know I've been to the party, so I know what's out there and what's recirculating. Okay. She's selling four of the 10 on eBay. All right. Okay. They do. It happens. I mean, you know. I mean, but you had a big job, you know, editor-in-chief of Ingenue Magazine. You were at Allure. I'm assuming that you made a lot more in your career and you weren't viewing this as another stepping stone in your salary.

Not at all. I lost money with the parties that I was throwing and the tables I was buying and things like that. I mean, I came out in the red after doing this show. But I mean, if you're looking at the economy of life, I consider I won. Do I have any regrets doing it? Not at all. Not for a second. Even though I was, you know,

most hated, even though I was the anti-hero, even though I had, you know, the trolls from around the world. Let me tell you, when you're getting messages from Australia saying, you dirty rhymes with punt. Like, you're just like, wow, they really do. You don't even know me or, you know, I hope your husband leaves you and horrible things happen to your kids. Oh yeah. Like these are people who have never met you. And I would do the whole, you know, well, even trash can do great things. They call it garbage can, not garbage can. I had a whole, okay. I mean, I had teenage boys who were helping me saying, oh, when they say this, this is what you have to say back. So the franchise just ran for one season. Why do you think it wasn't renewed?

I think a lot of reasons. I don't want to be polishing my own diamonds, but I know that after my first season, I said, well, I need to take a break. I need to step back. I mean, I, again, I mentally coming out of that, I was in a really bad way. I had not anticipated the backlash. So there were some really dark times for me post facto. So I know I stepped back and said, I had to take a break. I don't really know what happened production wise.

I just know, you know, they would say to me, would you do season two? And I had a publicist saying, well, you have to say you'd never say never. But at the time I said, but I can't do season two. Like you don't understand mentally. I don't have that in me. And I can remember one of the producers before I even knew how bad it was going to be. One of the producers was meeting with me and she said, well, you know, Kara, season two is for redemption.

And I was like, what? what's that supposed to mean so you you were like no way no how I'm not doing this again period the end you weren't open to doing more than one season at all I I definitely was not at that point I was not jumping back in again at all I I still hadn't I mean coming out of it, it took me a while. I can sit here and wax philosophical with you and tell you, I learned so much in this. Would you like to see my journal from when the show was airing in the next couple months? It was bad. God bless my husband for staying with me. We were just talking about it today. And I was laughing saying, you know, well know well you could say like I went crazy and he started laughing and he was like I could say that of

course it wouldn't be like the truth right honey and I was like oh no I know I know I was bonkers I was I mean it was bad tough and then you have to understand like I would pull up at you know after school pickup and there would be mothers there going oh that's her did you see what she said on the show it's awful it's disgusting and other mothers would share having my best interest at heart I assume saying oh she wants nothing to do with you she said she saw the show and she saw what you said like pariah doesn't even begin to describe it so I went through all of that I was the pariah I was the outcast I mean it was it was a lot like I wasn't even on any VIP lists. Okay. It wasn't like I was going, Hey, at least I'm going to this party and I'm having a

fun time. I was persona non grata. So no, I said there will not be a season two for me at this time. And what kind of other money-making opportunities did the show open up for you? Obviously, the book, I heard that you were offered five grand a week to be someone's sugar baby that you turned up. like to be my sugar baby for 5,000 a week. And I remember going, okay, first of all, I am totally insulted because I am very happily married. But secondly, five grand a week. Really? And then, and then I had, I remember when I shared it, somebody said, sure, zero baby. If you're a sugar baby, it's a sugar grandpa, like seriously. And I was going, okay, I know. And then my kids said, I think a lot of people get that on the internet mom like it's nice that you know you think it's funny but I think a lot of people hear that like oh god okay yeah it's funny when you when you get in the public eye in that form within the form of the housewives franchise it's amazing who reaches out to you I mean I had psychics telling me urgent that you

contact me ASAP I have have valuable information. I can remember sitting there going, Ooh, what is it? They know. I've gotten some of those messages too. I'm so curious, right? Immediately send me a picture of your right palm immediately. I'm like looking at my right palm. She see what's in there. I mean, the other, uh unfortunately, is a lot of financial woes, right? Why do you think that is? Who is the latest one? Him, Zolciak, I think, from Atlanta. She and her husband are getting divorced. They owe a million bucks in back taxes. Why do they, why is this a common theme and common headlines that come out about the housewives, do you think? is this a common theme and common headlines that come out about the housewives do you think i have a theory that you know you get on the show and there was you know it's first of all it's tough to cast so i want to say that so maybe people are cast and they're not quite the same financial snack bracket as some of the other housewives and they might borrow money they might you know rent houses because there is a lot of pressure to keep that up. I mean, you know, I'm, I'm sitting there asking these other women, well, who wants a $25,000 table? I mean, people were saying to me, you're absolutely ridiculous. But understand within the confines, we were all supposed to be these glamorous women leading these glamorous lives. I know, you know, some of my castmates were renting cars to pull up in front of my house in the right car. So there's a lot of pressure to present. And I think, you know, the notoriety,

the feedback from the fans, it's a lot of fun, it can be addictive, I think they get in there, and they get addicted to that. And they're spending more than what they're making. And they're, you know, spending on trips and travel and keeping up with the joneses i mean what a metaphor for life right they're hook line and sinker into the relativism and they get in over their heads i'd love to get your thoughts on how uh bethany responded to this uh of course for anyone who doesn't know bethany frankel real housewives of new york She said, it's the old housewives model to get on the show, make no money, spend, spend, logo, logo, car, car, house, house, bankruptcy, foreclosure, because you can't keep up. You're writing checks that you can't cash and it's gross.

Do you agree? It's I 100% agree. It's a vicious circle. If you aren't, you know, a Hilton or if you don't have it behind you the audience first of all I do think they will detect it and there is a lot of pressure from the other housewives from production from just the the very tone of the show the very nature of the show it's aspirational you know that that's what makes great reality television is it needs to be relatable sure but it also needs that element

of aspiration. Like that's I always say, that's why the Kardashians are such good television. Everybody fights with their sibling, maybe not while they're driving their Lamborghini. And that's what makes it fun. But everybody fights with their sibling. So you can relate to it. But it has that secret sauce of the aspirational aspect. And Bethany, she's great. I love her. Fun fact, she was a hostess at La Scala in Beverly Hills. And I was a hostess at the Bistro Garden down the street. But yeah, I think there's a lot of housewives writing checks they cannot cash and it catches up with you. And you know, I heard people say they, they spied on one of the Beverly Hills housewives and she was in a

Louis Vuitton store and she was paying for her purchase with spreading it out among three credit cards, whether that was so her husband didn't see the charges I mean that's the oldest trick in the book or whether it was because she didn't have enough credit on the three credit cards that's what she was doing and her fans were aghast and they were saying like we didn't want to ask for a photo because we sort of didn't know what to say. How embarrassing. It happens. To close, I got to ask you if you've ever needed money rehab. No. Yes. I lived in Beverly Hills. I worked for Allure magazine. And I had a great salary, a great salary. And my parents were really good. They made me read The Wealthy Barber when I was a teenager. And I learned a lot from that about savings and all of that stuff.

But I had no children. I had no husband. I had a great job and I had no responsibilities. Literally, I used to be the kind of person when that was my job, I would pay my rent, buy my food, have my money for going out. And then the rest of it, I was like, well, I got to spend all the rest of it. It was like it was like a task. Okay, so I have this much left over. So now I have to spend the rest of this. There was the concept of savings, even though I had read The Wealthy Barber and I knew about it. Oh, no, no, no, that was so lost on me. And I can remember I met my husband. he was like, oh my gosh, we're going to be in trouble if you keep this up. We need to have some conversations here. So knowing what you know now, what's a piece of money advice that you would give that former self who was a hostess at a restaurant in Beverly Hills and spending all that you made, I'm sure, on your nice but modest journalism salary?

Safe. What the heck? With every paycheck, take it and look at like a piece of pizza. You know, the way people say you have to eat that way, this many carbs and this much protein and whatnot. Every time you get that paycheck, it is never a paycheck as a whole. Like make sure you have the part set aside for charity. A hundred percent. You have to do that a lot for giving back. But also I took the Laurie Santos happiness course and it's a known fact. You give away and it will chalk up your happiness meter. It really does work. Money Rehab is a production of Money News Network. I'm your host, Nicole Lappin. Money Rehab's executive producer is Morgan Levoy. Our researcher is Emily Holmes. Do you need some money

rehab? And let's be honest, we all do. So email us your money questions, moneyrehab at moneynewsnetwork.com to potentially have your questions answered on the show or even have a one-on-one intervention with me. And follow us on Instagram at Money News and TikTok at Money News Network for exclusive video content. And lastly, thank you. No, seriously, thank you. Thank you for listening and for investing in yourself, which is the most important investment you can make. Thank you.