Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin - Heather Dubrow on Real Estate Wins and Fails, First-Date Refunds and Financial Red Flags

Episode Date: November 10, 2025

Heather Dubrow is back on Money Rehab and we could not be more excited, because Heather is the real deal; she’s built wealth, made mistakes, learned the hard way, and she’s not afraid to talk abou...t any of it. Today, Nicole and Heather dive into the Dubrows' recent real estate wins and failures, how she and her husband divide financial roles, and how they rebuilt trust after being scammed out of $2 million. Plus, because Heather is the most hilarious, Nicole gets Heather's hot takes on viral money stories. 

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Starting point is 00:03:21 required. I'm Nicole Lapin, the only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand. It's time for some money rehab. Heather freaking Dubrow is back on money rehab, and honestly, I could not be more excited because Heather is the real deal. She's built wealth, made mistakes, learned the hard way. And you know what? She is not afraid to talk about anything. of it. Last time she came on the show, we talked about the finances of the real housewives and money dysmorphia. Today we dive into her most recent real estate, quote, fail, a 16 and a half million dollar sale that somehow still ended up in a multi-million dollar loss and what she learned from it. And while the price points that Heather talks about for sure are super duper
Starting point is 00:04:11 ultra luxury, the takeaways apply no matter what price point you're playing with. We also dive into how she and her husband Terry divide financial roles, how they rebuilt trust. after being scammed out of $2 million. And because Heather is the most hilarious, I also get her hot takes on viral money stories that had us both cracking up, peeing in our pants, laughing in the studio. Here's Heather. Welcome back to Money Rehab.
Starting point is 00:04:37 Hi. I'm so happy to have you. I'm so happy to be here with you in person. I know. I was 412 months pregnant when we were on Zoom. And I met you over Zoom. And at that point in my pregnancy, I was really close to nine months pregnant. I didn't want to talk to any humans
Starting point is 00:04:52 but I just loved you so much I was like we should be real friends in real life if that's okay I know it's so hard to make adult friends No but this is how you make adult friends I have to tell you I mean I've had a podcast for over a decade and I realized maybe like a few years into it
Starting point is 00:05:09 that you know because you don't really realize why you're getting into this game right first it's like oh I need to expand my brand or send my message out or sell books or whatever it is. And what I realized was I am actually picking up humans that I adore and how fun that. It is so fun to think of it that way. Okay, this is how I'm going to make it.
Starting point is 00:05:33 That's how I met Laura Wasser. That's how I met you. It's how I met Ali Webb. All these amazing humans. And you know what I really love about this community that we're all in together is that we're all the kind of friends that it's not work. So if like I haven't seen you or spoken. to in quite some time. I'm so happy to be sitting with you. And we just before we started
Starting point is 00:05:53 made plans for lunch. So isn't that great? And it's not like, why hasn't you called me and what's going? You know, it's just nice. It is so nice. That's the thing about adult relationships with women who have a lot of shit going on. It's like if I haven't talked to you in a year or something, like it's fine. It's fine. And you just pick up. Yeah, totally. I know. I caught you up. The house burned down. Yeah. Lost everything. No big deal. Let's go back. I'm in an apartment. Here we go. I wish we could burn my storage down. No. Do you really wish that sometimes?
Starting point is 00:06:26 Like, do you wish you could start over? I mean, I feel like we have started over. So I, the kind of household I grew up in, I mean, we moved once. So we really had a family home forever. And we moved when I was young. So I grew up in like one house. My family, Terry and I, we didn't plan this, but we moved every three years. literally every three years. The only reason we stayed in Chateau Dubrow, as people know it,
Starting point is 00:06:52 for six years was because of the pandemic. This is the $16 million house? Because I want to get it to it. No, that was the $55 million. Oh, okay. So I'm so sorry. So let's go back to the start of $16 million house because you've talked a lot about real estate. You've talked about a lot of wins that you guys have had moving around all over the place, flipping houses, doing juzing. So you said that your biggest real estate fail, which does not sound like a fail to most people, was the $16.1 million property that you bought and Beverly Hills sold it for $16.5. Sounds like you made $400 grand. But Terry, your husband, says that you guys lost $5 million. Yes. Explain. Just do that man-mouth. When it came to this particular build, we had a problem with our contractor. I know this seems obvious, but like if you're
Starting point is 00:07:41 well-known, sometimes the prices go up. If you live in a certain zip code, the price. The price prices go up and I know all that, but I've built so many houses. I know what things cost. And I don't even mind, I mean, I do mind, but I don't mind paying a premium for great builders and subs and whatnot. But it was gouging. And we had a very clear budget and nine months into the project. He came back to us with a budget that was $8 million over the very clear budget. And that's, what was the budget? The budget was $15 million. And he came back to us with a budget that was $8 million. And he came back to us with a budget that was $8 million. And he came back. He came back. He came back. The budget. He came came back at like 23, 24 million. And that's starting. And if you've ever built a house before, you know that this- It's always over-time-over-budget, but not that much. No. But that's the starting one.
Starting point is 00:08:27 I mean, I said 15, thinking we'd swell to 18, 19, and I was okay with that. But it just got out of hand. And then the fires happened and the fire insurance and the whole, it was so many things. And we were now so far out of our time schedule. So I have three kids in college. We just put the third one. She's a freshman this year. And so my fourth child is a freshman in high school.
Starting point is 00:08:49 And I was like, by the time we're done with this house, he's graduating. And now it's you and me in this huge place, in this huge land and all the things and the maintenance and whatever. And I went, I am tired just thinking about it. I'm done. I don't want to spend the next three years on a construction site. So you didn't finish the renovations. No. You sold it.
Starting point is 00:09:08 I lipsticked it and we sold it. Which means just like a josh. So it looks. presentable. I'm sure it looked way more than presentable. It was fine. Do you regret selling it? No. Why? I think that, you know, there have been a few times in our lives that we didn't listen to the universe and one particular time with real estate where we had bought a house and the seller had seller's remorse and they really didn't want to sell it. And they were like, I think they were even willing to give us a couple hundred thousand dollars to walk away from it. but we had little kids, and I think I was pregnant with my third. It was like one of those, but we need a house, and there were no houses. And so we took the house, and then it was 0809, and the real estate market crashed,
Starting point is 00:09:57 and we couldn't give the house away, and we were totally upside down on it. But the universe was trying to tell us to walk away, and we didn't listen. If somebody's listening and they're like, this is a crazy price point, this is way out of anything that I would buy or consider, but there's a lesson here. if you're going to do renovations, right? Yes. Always get a budget before you start. It sounds pretty obvious, but what did you learn from that experience?
Starting point is 00:10:23 So it's a little bit of a longer story. So when we got the house, there was a wildlife ordinance going on in L.A. So we want to get ahead of it, or else we wouldn't have been able to build a guest house and certain other things. So I hired a team really quickly just to get through the city. So we got grandfathered in. So I was able to do that. which was really good for the property.
Starting point is 00:10:46 So I did that and then realized the team I had hired wasn't capable of building the house that I wanted to build. So we had a clear budget, but it became very obvious that that was in the right team. So we made a switch quickly, but the new team dragged their heels on the budget. And I really thought we were all very clear, but yes, I would say any kind of renovation, you need a very clear budget from day one, and you have to make sure they stick with the budget. you have to participate. And it's all the hidden costs, too, that really add up. Well, it's also when you have a line item or a budget for like faucets or something, and you've agreed to that. And then
Starting point is 00:11:25 they show you the faucet in your budget. And you're like, I don't like that faucet. I want the nicer fuzz. Yes. And that's how the budget swells. But I think one of the problems from what I have seen, and listen, there's great contractors out there. But there are also a lot of people out there that want to take advantage and they want to they want to eat up your profit unless you know this is a home you're going to be living in for 30 years you got to be careful what you spent so on your podcast that you've had for a hundred years now between us you and terry talk a lot about your investments and real estate investments you alluded to the idea that you sold to two criminals that was a different house okay i need i need like a whiteboard for all i know we've done a lot of real i'm telling you we
Starting point is 00:12:12 move every three years. And we, like, so that particular house, we had a house in Bel Air, and I have the twins there. And we had bought a second home in Balbo Island because he was working, Terry was working in Orange County. So I was like, all right, let's get this cute little beach house. This will be fun. We can spend a few days here, a few days there, so you don't have to commute every day, whatever. And then the market went crazy. It was booming. So I made up a number, put it on the market, and it sold full price. in 10 days. So these guys bought that.
Starting point is 00:12:45 And the real estate agent was so funny. And Gary, and he was like, you know, they're not doing what they're supposed to be doing. They're not performing. They're supposed to send this. They're supposed to send that. And I'm like, it'll be fine. Don't worry about it. He's like, I don't think you should pack.
Starting point is 00:13:00 I don't think. I don't think it's. And then they paid the money. We moved out. They had a party right after we moved out. Apparently, they decorated the whole thing in Versace. and they had a party for Bill Clinton there and then it turned out they were criminals
Starting point is 00:13:17 and they went to jail. Do we know who they are? No. Isn't that crazy? But if somebody is thinking about, you know, you kind of fell into, it sounds like luxury flipping. Yes. But if somebody is thinking about doing that
Starting point is 00:13:30 and they're out shopping for house, is there something that you would tell them to keep in mind that could be updated or like a kitchen always adds a lot of value or something like that, or any house could be updated. Well, first of all, I'll tell you this. I think there are so many flipping television shows, and I think so many people have tried to be flippers.
Starting point is 00:13:53 There's really not a lot of deals out there anymore. And I hear this from my friends who are literally professional flippers that have TV shows that do this. There's very little out there. And so I don't think it's the best business to get into, to be honest. But when you look for a house for yourself, you know, you need good bones and a good floor plan. Anything else can be changed. But my biggest tip would be don't do anything that's so weird that will turn people off.
Starting point is 00:14:22 Like, I remember once I was in, I was looking at houses and I went into Shack's home. And the bathroom was purple. The marble was purple. Okay, well, that makes sense. Like Lakers? Yes. Yeah. Because he's Shack.
Starting point is 00:14:37 Because why not? But like you don't want a purple marble. But also does he have a larger bath? Everything was big. But it was purple. So what I would say is like if you like color, that's great. Do things that make you happy in your home, but not in things that are hard to change. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:14:52 When you're talking about flooring and marble and hard surfaces like that, go in some sort of like neutral vibe. Even if it's interesting, that's fine. but nothing that's like purple or pink or yellow or bright blue do that with your wallpaper like I mean look how cute this is this looks so good in here you have a pop of color got art this is what you do you've got a great wall with texture on it but this was a garage I know it looks great and honestly it looks terrific just how you wear it I guess it totally is but I mean like this would be great on a wall in a house but you wouldn't
Starting point is 00:15:30 want to do something green or you know something that you can't change. I see. Because people walk in and they go, how much is it going to cost me to fix that? What's been more expensive or less expensive when you've tried to go in and fix something or change something for renovations? And I agree with you that not everybody should jump into this and HGTV makes it look so easy and sexy. They do. But it's really oversaturated. It is oversaturated. But I have to say, I think something to know, I mean, like everything's easy and hard depending on how aggressive you want to be with things. But what I will tell you is I
Starting point is 00:16:03 think there's so many less expensive alternatives that still look so good. I was in Home Depot recently and their stone is beautiful. And I'll tell you, porcelain is so great. Porcelain's gotten expensive. If you get
Starting point is 00:16:19 expensive porcelain, it's almost the same price as marble, but it doesn't stain, which is great. But it used to be that porcelain. I messed that up in one house, by the way. Really? Yeah, I had like a white marble. I thought it was so great until a lemon or something went on it. Yeah. And it's Oh, well, it's any marble.
Starting point is 00:16:34 It doesn't have to be white. It's any color. I have a dark brown in our apartment, and it's completely stained. So you want to do quartz or you want to do porcelain, and porcelain is gorgeous. But the cheaper porcelain with the veins that look like marble, it used to be they only had a couple of repeats. So you would put tile on the floor, and you would very easily know it was cheap porcelain. But now they've gotten so good at it that you really can't tell. Totally agree.
Starting point is 00:17:02 They showed me this floor. it looked the same. It's not. It's vinyl. It's great. And I like porcelain. I like porcelain wood. Have you seen porcelain that they make that looks like wood? I have not. Oh, it's great. I did it in my laundry room in my last house because it looks fantastic, but it's washable. So for bathrooms, kids rooms, so good. So you've had so many highs and lows with real estate. Right? Like you got offered 130 percent. Then 2008 was a disaster. What do you learn from the highs and lows? How do you think about your real estate investing moving forward?
Starting point is 00:17:37 I think for us, we're done. You're done? Like, you're living in an apartment now? Yes. And you're done. Yes. Well, I am trying to buy the apartment underneath us. So you're going to own the whole apartment building?
Starting point is 00:17:49 I want to just have, because I need, I would like to not have, I don't want a blade of grass again. Really? No. I don't want me. Coming from New York. Yes. When I lived in New York, I was always like, I want my own tree.
Starting point is 00:18:02 Central Park at all the trees. All I want is a tree. Okay, that's fair. I've lived with enough trees that someone else can have them now. Okay. I love being in a tall building. I love how safe I feel. I love having 10 people downstairs at all times to help. And so I don't, the people see, well, I'll tell you what I've learned. So the people that own the apartment underneath us, it needs to be completely gutted. It smells like cats. It's awful. And yes, it does. and they're very unrealistic about what it's worth, but the comps don't support it. I refuse to overpay for that.
Starting point is 00:18:38 If it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be. I could overpay for it and just get it and do it. Would my life change? No. It's not a huge amount of money, but it's enough money that it's, it doesn't make sense to me. I won't do it. I appreciate that about you.
Starting point is 00:18:54 It's about the principle. It is, and it's just not worth it. And again, listen to the universe. So, I mean, for me, moving forward, I want to stay in this apartment. And then I think someday we'll probably have like an extra house, like in the desert or something, somewhere where we could go with the family and, you know, do the holidays or whatever it is. But for right now, I have two kids on the East Coast and two kids on the West Coast. Three are in college.
Starting point is 00:19:23 One's in high school. And, I mean, who knows where we're all going to end up? I never thought, oh, we're going to flip houses. This is going to be our thing. It literally, every time it happened was a knock on the door. Explained. Like even our last home, our Crystal Cove home. This is $55 million.
Starting point is 00:19:39 Yeah. Josh Altman, it wasn't on the market. Josh Altman, who I didn't know at the time, was blowing up my social media, calling my podcast studio. Like, I need to get in touch with Heather Drew. I'm like, who is this guy? What does he want? So I had Terry call him. And he was like, I have a guy that wants to see your house.
Starting point is 00:19:56 And I'm like, whatever. So I said, yeah, you could show it. I said, but it's 22,000 square feet. There's hidden rooms. No one's ever seen it. Because even on the show, we didn't show every room. What do you have hidden rooms? Like, is there a sex dungeon or?
Starting point is 00:20:10 No. No sex dungeon. But, you know, like hidden doors and panic room and like just like cool things like that, a music room, just like little hidden spaces that we didn't, first of all, I was always really careful with the show because just for safety reasons. I didn't want people to have like a blueprint, you know, of my house. Like potential robbers. Yes. And there were a lot of home invasions around Newport Beach at the time. So that was sort of scary. But anyway, so I said to Josh, I go, you know, come over, whatever. I so didn't think it was serious. I went for a run. I was sweaty,
Starting point is 00:20:48 no makeup with a baseball cat on when Josh arrived with this billionaire guy and his entourage. And I was like, hey, come on in. I gave them a tour like I was giving you a tour. Like I would open, I had these drawers next to my shower that heeded the towels. And I would, and I opened the drawer and I said to him, I'm like, touch it. Lourious. Touch it. And he did and whatever.
Starting point is 00:21:11 It was so funny. So there's a price for everything. Everything. When Josh Altman knocks on the door with billionaire. Hell yeah. Listen, everything's for sale. I mean, except the children and some of them are questionable depending on the day. But, no, I mean, to me, it's brick and mortar.
Starting point is 00:21:25 I'm not, I'm not sentimental about things like that. It's just a house. Okay. A drawer that heats the towels, genius. Yes. And a panic room, which I've always dreamed of if I, this sounds kind of morbid, but like I always wanted a bunker room. Yes.
Starting point is 00:21:44 I don't. A panic room? What is the difference? Okay. So a bunker is, to me, sounds like something under the ground, doomsday. and everyone's dying, but you. I don't want to live in that scenario.
Starting point is 00:21:55 I will go. It's fine. I don't want to be the last one standing. I don't want to forage for food. I'm not built for that. Don't put me on Survivor. I don't want to be naked and afraid. I don't want to be on the traders.
Starting point is 00:22:08 It just all sounds very uncomfortable. No. A panic room is like there's someone in your house and you hear something and you run into that room and you close the door and there's a phone in there so you can call. call the police. Okay. And they can come save you. And it's camouflage.
Starting point is 00:22:28 And it's camouflaged, yes. Cool. So was that there before you moved in or did you? No, no, we built that house from the ground up. Oh. I designed that house. So I love, love, love how much you and Terry are talking about finances. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:41 On the pod. Obsessed. Thank you so much for doing that. Yes. So it sounds like he's overseeing real estate investments. You're doing day-to-day financial, management? So I do day-to-day financial. I mean, we have a bookkeeper and we have an accountant that is way above me. But I handle day-to-day money. Real estate is sort of a joint effort.
Starting point is 00:23:05 He tends to find real estate. I build the houses. But what Terry does is he invests our money. That's his clear lane is investing. He's great at it. Stock market investing. Stock market. venture capitalism, all that kind of stuff. That's Terry's venue. So you guys have like clear financials. Yes, we do. So with couples and finances, is that something that's worked out for you? Would you say like divide and conquer or where have you guys? I think you have to figure out where it's good for you. I can't remember, but you and I may have talked about this before, but we had a really bad, you know, situation where Terry made an investment. It's a million dollar. Yeah, and it was two million dollars but I swear I told you then I'll say it again I know for a fact that there is a reason
Starting point is 00:23:53 that happened because if that had not happened we would have made a bigger mistake somewhere down the line and I I was so mad at myself that I was like I'm like my mom like I why do I have no idea like where or what do we have any DBA accounts like or do we have Roth Iris like what is going on I didn't know so it was then that you got yes that we've we changed everything and I will tell you that the majority of our wealth was born from that moment. Interesting. Yes, 100%. Well, since we talked, this has been in the news quite a bit.
Starting point is 00:24:29 Calvin Harris is accusing his financial advisor of stealing 22 million bucks. Andrew Day says her former manager stole $1.6 million. They're obviously in the thick of the fallout here, but from your situation, is there any advice that you would give to them? We don't have a money manager. I know there's really talented people out there. Not everyone's a crook. But if you're going to have someone manage your money, you have to know where every dime is. You can't hand someone.
Starting point is 00:25:00 I mean, it's just so crazy. It's like giving your sister, hold my allowance for me. Yeah, right. Please. Just the notion of being blind or allowing someone to sign your checks is so crazy to me. I have a new assistant. So my last assistant got married and went off and moved and all the things and love her, happy for her. But I was trying to find a new assistant.
Starting point is 00:25:26 And so I hired someone that didn't work out. It was a very short notice. I realized it was a good workout. And she said to me, like, after a week, she's like, look, I know you're not ready to give me your financial information. But when you are, I'm ready to jump in. I thought to myself, what? I'm never ready for that. Are you talking about? You're never getting my financial information. But I think what happened, and now I have a great assistant, by the way, she's fabulous.
Starting point is 00:25:53 But I don't understand the naivety of people. Do you think you would have done that before the scam? No. Me? Give someone no. So this didn't give you trust issues? Well, I mean, yes, only because we put our trust in someone we thought was an accountant that turns out to be a tax prepare. Yes. I mean, but I mean, in our defense, I guess, he was vetted by someone famous, but this is the problem, famous and wealthy. And so it was like, oh, he's his guy. So, of course, he's good. We don't need to vet him, but you do.
Starting point is 00:26:26 And I'm sure that Calvin Harris at all were probably given that person from someone that they trusted. And they said, oh, he handles so and so and so and so. He's great. He's made them a fortune. You should do that. And you trust that. But my gosh, when it comes to money, you're in charge of yourself.
Starting point is 00:26:47 So you don't think you'll ever work with a financial advisor? No. You guys got it. We've got it. We never have. Or how do you vet people now, even if you get a recommendation? And by the way, you don't need to justify it. Like, you got scammed.
Starting point is 00:27:00 That's crappy. Yeah, but it was our fault. It was totally our fault. What could you have done? He didn't ask the right questions and I didn't ask him the right questions. You know, he was personally guaranteed by this. pretend accountant and this other attorney. But I never asked him what the collateral was.
Starting point is 00:27:18 And Terry didn't ask them. And it was all, it was just, there were so many red flags that we ignored separately and together that, you know, it was just, it was such a mess. I think for us, we feel more comfortable just handling our own thing. And now thinking. And wait, and look, let's be honest, we're not. you know, the Kardashians who are dealing with billions of dollars, that is something that I think when you're in that realm, maybe you do need outside people to manage your wealth in certain
Starting point is 00:27:57 aspects. But would I give them all of it? No. How would you vet people now after those red flags from the like CPA not CPA? Yeah. I mean, obviously you start with the recommendations. And then, I mean, I think you have to hire attorneys and people to look into them. But it sounds like the guy lied, like just straight up lied. Oh, yeah, he lied to us. But had we looked into him, I mean, I don't think it was probably a huge leap to figure out that he wasn't a board certified accountant. Yeah, but also Terry knows you could say board certified whatever doctor.
Starting point is 00:28:36 Like, do people actually go look it up? No, and that's the problem. and that's why people end up unbatched because they go, oh, I have a friend, she's the plumping princess or whatever they call her, and then they're injecting cement into your face and you have no idea what they're injecting in there. It's the same exact thing. But you think, oh, so-and-so went, she looks great, so I'm just going to trust that. You can't. I'm telling you, you shouldn't trust a doctor that way, and you shouldn't trust an accountant that way. You have got to vet them. Verify their certification. You must verify it. And,
Starting point is 00:29:09 I don't know how to verify this off the top of my head with financial people. I would have to, honestly, I'd like to hear your answer for that. But for doctors, I mean, just because they say board certified, what does that mean? What's the board? There's only one plastic surgery board, the American board of plastic surgeons. That's it. Yeah. For financial, you would look up CFP.
Starting point is 00:29:30 If they have a CFP, you go to the CFP website, you would check if they're registered with FINRA or the SEC, if they're part of an RIA, like a registered investment. advisor. And so if they are an IAR and investment representative advisor, they would be part of an RIA, whatever. This is all opposite suit stuff. No, no, but this is, it's important. But now I know I'm just going to call you. I got it. Yeah. I got you. Anybody that you're potentially going to work with. Listen, God willing, we get to that status. I'm calling you. I got you. And if I need a pumping princess, I'm calling you. Yes, please. You don't need anything. You're perfect. You and Terry have grown so much well together, though, which I love. And you guys are really open and honest
Starting point is 00:30:11 about it. But it sounds like there was a period of lifestyle creep where Terry was getting a little like spendy excited about money. No, I would say the exact opposite is true. He's not a spender at all. He's actually the opposite. What he thinks, what is so crazy about him is that he grew up with not a lot of money. And he is completely self-made. I mean, he put himself through medical school and all the things. And what he always says is that now that he could afford it, he doesn't want it anymore. Like when he was younger, he wanted like that Ferrari or this watch or this whatever. And now he doesn't care. He wears literally black scrubs every day. And then his clothes, I mean, it's not that it's not expensive, but David Hyle, who owns David August, makes all of his
Starting point is 00:31:00 clothes. But we go twice a year. He gets clothes made and then he does and think about it. And they're just there. So do you guys work on a budget? We don't have a budget. We, I mean, I'm in charge of the money. So I spend what I feel like we need to spend on our family and everything else gets invested. Or if you get a big check, are you investing a portion of that? How does it work?
Starting point is 00:31:24 Right now, no. Right now, we're very much into spending what we make. Okay. But it sounds like you can. It's not like you are doing that recklessly. No, listen, we are not reckless people. I'm telling you, I don't like debt, except for debt that makes sense. We are very into buy, borrow, die.
Starting point is 00:31:49 It sounds like you guys really work together on all sorts of financial decisions. So we had a meeting with some financial people to discuss, you know, what to do with our money for the kids. like a stay planning. We have all that. We have all the state planning, but it's like, what's the next step of that? And what can you do with your money?
Starting point is 00:32:12 The point is, when they started telling us everything and what was going to be taxed, and then the tax is so much money that I looked at Terry and I go, well, I asked them, I said, what do people do with their money? They go, they give it to charity
Starting point is 00:32:28 because they know that the government's taking so much, so instead they just give it all to charity and all these different things. and we do give a lot to charity, and that's in the estate also and all of that. But I like to dare it. I go, all I heard from that meeting is we need to spend more money. Because the government's going to take it. That was the takeaway for both.
Starting point is 00:32:49 Yes. Well, I love that you're so open and honest about it. I talk about it with you because we're talking about financial things. And if people want to hear about that, that's fine. And we, like, I really don't have anything to hide. But, like, this is not a conversation I can have on the housewives. But didn't you just have this conversation with this woman named? Gretchen? We did talk, well, not this conversation. Okay, tell me the conversation. Okay. What happened was she
Starting point is 00:33:11 has been with her life partner for 16 years. But back when they were dating on the show, on camera, she had told me she couldn't marry him because of his financial situation. So now all these years later, they're still together and whatnot. And one of the other girls said, are you guys going to get married? And she gave some answer that didn't make sense to me. And I go, but that's not what you said. You said you can't ever marry, which is fine, but because of the finances. I think it's an important conversation to have because you've got to know what you're getting into financially before you make a contract, a marital contract with another person, because then that's your debt too. Right. And so then they got engaged, right? Or her Instagram bio says that they're
Starting point is 00:33:58 married or they're married? No, they're not married legally, I guess. But yes, had gotten engaged right after she told me that she couldn't marry him. So that's why we were all like, oh, it's fake. But they're together a long time. Clearly, they have a great relationship. They love each other. No doubt about it. But I wish she would just kind of say, yeah, I can't marry him. I think a lot of women feel uncomfortable about finances, but you really stand up for that and say that you have to talk about it. And also, Gretchen is very impressive. She owns her house. She is a breadwinner. She is very financially stable. And it's important. important to her, and I think it's something to celebrate. So if somebody's uncomfortable about
Starting point is 00:34:37 talking finances with somebody they're about to marry, that's a red flag. That's a total red flag. I mean, did you guys talk about it? Yeah, what do you mean? Did you ask him what his FICA score was? Interesting, you bring that up because I have a game that I would love to play with you. Let's do it. And a credit score is part of it. So we're calling it. Do bro-nosed-dough. I'm going to give you some financial hot topics, and I would love your take. Okay. A bride and groom were called tacky for charging a dining fee to their wedding guests. They asked their friends and family to send money alongside their RSVP that would, quote, contribute toward the cost of their wedding buffet dinner reception at rates of $40, up to $40. Is this
Starting point is 00:35:27 tacky or reasonable? It's so tacky. And you know, it's funny, I had a gal that worked for us years ago. And she was from Turkey. And all of her friends were getting married at that time. And I've heard this from other people, like from Romania, like different countries where all the girls were getting married and they would pay to go to each other's weddings. And it was a big deal because I remember one of them telling me there was a scandal because one of the girls who was getting married upcharged all the guests and they actually made money on the wedding. Gross. The thing is, I mean, I don't know. I just find that so bizarre.
Starting point is 00:36:04 You know, if you could only do a small, it comes down to do what's the point of marriage and what's the point of a wedding and a ceremony. You want to celebrate. You want to celebrate with your family and friends. You do what you can afford. And that's it. I don't even like a cash bar. If you can't afford, I mean, you know, two buck chock.
Starting point is 00:36:21 There's really inexpensive ways. Heather, you're not drinking two buck chock. No, I'm not. But, well, you never know. Limo Shamps is sitting there. That's all I got. But I'm just saying, like, there's a way. way to do it. Serve pictures of sangria or pictures of batched cocktails or something. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:36:40 There's ways to do it. I just find that tacky. Okay. A man went viral recently after asking his date to refund him after a failed first date. They went on a date. He paid. He asked for a second date. She said no. And in response, he asked if she could then mo him for the drinks. Whose side are you on here? I read that. And I think it's in the same. insane. Let me tell this to all the single people out there. When you meet someone, you go on a date, that person might not be for you, but you never know who anyone knows or who you might run into in the future. And what if his best friend is your perfect match? And now you were douchy. Yeah, whatever. It's so bad. So tacky. There was a recent study that showed almost
Starting point is 00:37:25 two in three Americans believe that spending more on a date will lead to a successful relationship. it. What do you think? No, definitely not. What was your first date? We went on a blind date with another couple at Ivy at the Shore. So that was expensive. It was dinner. But I mean, I'm trying to, I don't honestly, Terry and I have been together 29 years. I'm not really sure. I remember any first dates. But, I mean, it's all about the connection. I think, I don't think it has to be expensive. I think the first date has to be short. Don't put too much pressure. I think actually a dinner date's too long. Meet for drinks, meat for coffee, something finite.
Starting point is 00:38:05 Okay. There is a dating app, so back to credit scores, called Score that failed. It was an app that required users to have a credit score of $675 to join. Would you swipe left on someone with a credit score below $675? Probably not. Left is the bad one. I don't even know. I would say I wouldn't go out with the bad credit score guy.
Starting point is 00:38:29 Oh, really? Yeah. Probably not. When did you ask Terry about his credit score? I didn't. He was a doctor. Heather, a credit score doesn't mean you're rich. It just means you're responsible.
Starting point is 00:38:41 It's true. However, this was a guy that remember, so here's the other thing. Like when I met Terry, I really didn't like him. I was 27 and he was 38 because we're 10 and a half years apart. The half is important. And so to me, I was in my 20s. I'm on a TV show. I'm living my best.
Starting point is 00:38:59 life. He's almost 40. And he's a doctor. It was very old. I don't know. It wasn't my jam. I didn't think to ask about the credit score. He drove a Porsche. He was a doctor. He had a white coat. And here we are. 29 years. And his credit score is good, but not as good as mine. Oh, what's your credit score? Do you know? No, I just saw it, but I don't remember. 700 or something? It's, it's very high. Yeah. It's good. But it's higher than his. I'm very responsible, yes. I don't know why that is. I mean, we actually had the CEO of FICO on the show and he said his assistant's credit score is higher than his because she's more responsible with payments. And it doesn't have to do with how much money you have. It just has to do with how
Starting point is 00:39:45 consistent you are with payments and how much you spend on a credit card compared to your limit utilization and stuff like that. Right. But that's why it's important to have your kids have credit cards. Did you do an authorized user for them? Our kids, the older three are all old enough. They all have credit cards because I wanted them to start building their credit scores. Amazing. Yeah, you can do it on some credit cards.
Starting point is 00:40:10 They allow you to put your kids before they're 18. So you can, as long as you're responsible with the credit. Yeah, but I wouldn't do that. Really? But not with the credit card. They just, they don't get to use the credit card. Oh. They just sort of piggyback on your.
Starting point is 00:40:23 Oh, I see. Yeah, no, that sounds like a good idea. I wouldn't give my kids, although they have debit cards. But that was the first way to teach them about, you know, check your accounts, see how much money you have. Another viral story, a woman called out her boyfriend for not paying for her 18 friends at her birthday dinner. This is the opposite take that influencer Tinks got roasted for last year. She said that if you choose the restaurant for your birthday dinner, you should pick up the tab. What is the etiquette for birthday dinner? You should pay for. You should pay for. That's a good question. I was always very uncomfortable having people pay for me. I just never liked that. So I
Starting point is 00:41:01 always threw my own party. Always. And always paid. Always threw a dinner, had a party, and always paid. That's not to say people haven't taken me out from time to time. But I just feel like unless, I don't know, it's a milestone birthday and they say to you, we are handling this. I think, yeah, I think the birthday person, Should pay. Terry would not agree with that. Would Terry have paid for all of your friends to go to dinner when you were dating? Of course. Because he was a doctor with a Porsche. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:34 By the way, Terry always picks up the tap. I love that. There's a lot of people with alligator arms. No, I don't like the alligator arms. A woman in Michigan sued a man for $10,000 after he stood her up on a date, citing extreme emotional distress. Get it. Who should win the lawsuit? I love that.
Starting point is 00:41:53 Why, yes, someone should be held accountable. Hey. Have you been on such a bad date that you would have sent a lawsuit? Do you remember? No. Okay. I even, listen, I went on the love connection. Do you remember the love connection?
Starting point is 00:42:07 Chuck Willery, be back into. No way. Yes. So when I first moved out to L.A., my sister and I were like, we were here, you know, we went on the love connection, game shows. Yeah, that's before apps. Yeah, it was like what we did. So when, no, I went on the love con, because I was an actress.
Starting point is 00:42:21 I just wanted to be on TV. Oh, so that? Yeah. I was like wanted to be on TV. But you're a single. Any, yes, but it was really just to be on TV. So, so I go, are you telling me ever, spoiler alert, the people on The Bachelor are not looking for love.
Starting point is 00:42:33 No. I know it's upsetting. Tell me. Anyway, so I go on the love connection and they give me these three choices that were like, to the point where Chuck, when they show the three guys on the screen, he goes, who picked these guys for her? Anyway, I went on the date with the guy. And he was very nice, but like such a no, hard no.
Starting point is 00:42:53 But I felt so bad that at the end I was like, oh, yeah, I'll go out with them again. But all the girls, all the production girls knew that I was just being nice. So they brought him out and were like, and then afterwards I was, chum, gone. I just, I would just show up. I just think it's mean to stand someone up. It's horrible. You don't know she prepped, got her hair done, bought an outfit, was so excited, told her mom. Did her lips, $10,000 probably at Terry's would be.
Starting point is 00:43:23 the bill. There you go. I don't know. So this is from an advice show that I used to co-host. We got a call from three sisters. One of them was broke, and the other two kept having to pay for her on vacation, and they were sick of it. So I said that the sisters should just suck it up and pay for it. And my co-host said that the two sisters should just go on vacation alone. Whose side are you on? It depends. It depends. What does the broke one do? If the two ones that have money, one's a doctor and one's an accountant and the broke one is an artist and really just, you know, isn't there yet or is a social worker and doesn't make the same income that the other two make and they want to all travel together? I think it's cool if they chip in and pay for their sister.
Starting point is 00:44:08 If she's a loser and is sitting at home doing nothing and is a spendthrift and can't manage her money, then I think they should go without her and maybe that will light a fire under her and get her going. I love it. Thank you so much for playing the first edition of Debrough Nose Doe. We end our episodes by asking for a tip that listeners can take straight to the bank. I know you've given us so many. But is there one more? Last time you talked about investing in NVIDIA. Oh, yeah, that's still a good idea. Don't you think? I mean, it's pretty expensive right now.
Starting point is 00:44:44 It's pretty high right now. We talked about Terry came on at the very end, and he was telling us, like, where are you guys invested at what number? To be honest, even though we lost all that money from the house, we took the money we were going to build that house with a couple of years ago and put it in Invidia. Oh. So we did okay. That's even better. Yeah. That's why it was like, you know, it's like risk. That's why I'm not like crying about the money.
Starting point is 00:45:09 It's, you know, it's a lot of money. But it ended up being okay. Well, over time, the stock market gets 10% and real estate in general gets four and a half percent. But it's still good to be diversified. I mean, it's such an antiquated saying, but you can't have all your eggs in one basket. You just can't. You have to diversify. I think a little real estate and stocks and, you know, some maybe like bonds. Crypto? We have crypto. We do. We took a little chunk of money a couple years ago and threw it in crypto and said, let's just not look at it for a few years. And so every once while we look at it, we go, okay.

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