Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin - Heidi and Marc D'Amelio, "TikTok's First Family" on Running a Family Business and Parenting Influencers

Episode Date: October 2, 2024

Roughly 57% of Gen Zers want to be influencers. Should their parents let them? Today I’m talking to the perfect people to ask: Heidi and Marc D’Amelio, parents of two of the biggest influencers on TikTok, Dixie and Charli D’Amelio. Nicole talks to Heidi and Marc about what advice they’d give parents of kids who want to be influencers, how in their family business they protect both the family and the business, how the changing business dynamics in their household has affected their marriage and so much more. Want more of the D’Amelios? Check out Heidi here, Marc here, D’Amelio Footwear here and Be Happy Snacks here. $ Take control of your finances by using a Chime checking account with features like no maintenance fees, fee-free overdraft up to $200, or getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit. Visit: http://chime.com/MNN  $ Looking for the perfect holiday gift for your coworkers, friends, and everyone in between? Choose Nicole’s favorite wine, Justin. Get 20 percent off your order for a limited time with the code “MONEY20” at http://justinwine.com/  $ Ready to find a financial advisor that’s right for your financial goals? Get matched with a trusted, vetted financial advisor at: http://moneypickle.com/MNN  All investment strategies involve risk of loss. The information shared in this podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. Listeners should do their own research and consult a financial advisor before making any investment decisions. See terms for additional details: https://moneynewsnetwork.com/terms/ 

One of the most stressful periods of my life was when I was in credit card debt. I got to a point where I just knew that I had to get it under control for my financial future and also for my mental health. We've all hit a point where we've realized it was time to make some serious money moves. So take control of your finances by using a Chime checking account with features like no maintenance fees, fee-free overdraft up to $200, or getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit. Learn more at Chime.com slash MNN. When you check out Chime, you'll see that you can overdraft up to $200 with no fees. If you're an OG listener, you know about my infamous $35 overdraft fee that

I got from buying a $7 latte and how I am still very fired up about it. If I had Chime back then, that wouldn't even be a story. Make your fall finances a little greener by working toward your financial goals with Chime. Open your account in just two minutes at Chime.com slash MNN. That's Chime.com slash MNN. Chime. Feels like progress. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancorp Bank N.A. or Stride Bank N.A. Members FDIC. SpotMe eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Boosts are available to eligible Chime members enrolled in SpotMe and are subject to monthly limits. Terms and conditions apply. Go to Chime.com slash disclosures for details.

I love hosting on Airbnb. It's a great way to bring in some extra cash, but I totally get it that it might sound overwhelming to start or even too complicated if, say, you want to put your summer home in Maine on Airbnb, but you live full time in San Francisco and you can't go to Maine every time you need to change sheets for your guests or something like that. If thoughts like these have been holding you back, I have great news for you. Airbnb has launched a co-host network, which is a network of high quality local co-hosts with Airbnb experience that can take care of your home and your guests. Co-hosts can do what you don't have time for, like managing your

reservations, messaging your guests, giving support at the property, or even create your listing for you. I always want to line up a reservation for my house when I'm traveling for work, but sometimes I just don't get around to it because getting ready to travel always feels like a scramble, so I don't end up making time to make my house look guest-friendly. I guess that's the best way to put it. But I'm matching with a co-host so I can still make that extra cash while also making it easy on myself. Find a co-host at Airbnb.com slash host. I'm Nicole Lappin, the only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand. It's time for some money rehab. Roughly 57% of Gen Zers want to be influencers. Now, should their parents let them? Today,

I'm going to ask the perfect people about this. Heidi and Mark D'Amelio, parents of the most famous sisters on TikTok, Dixie and Charlie D'Amelio. Together, they've been dubbed TikTok's first family, and their meteoric rise on social media has translated into huge partnerships, big brands, and a TV show. Today, I talked to them about what advice they'd give parents of kids who want to be influencers, how in their family business they protect both the family and the business, and how the changing money dynamics in their household have affected their marriage and so much more. Here's Heidi and Mark. Heidi and Mark D'Amelio, welcome to Money Rehab. Thanks for having us.

Thank you. Where did you guys meet? Well, I had been modeling. I'm from Louisiana and I was modeling there, New Orleans, all of that. And I wanted to see if I could do it in New York City. So my friends and I moved and I knew I had to have a job to actually pay the bills. So I was a personal trainer at a gym. And the guy that ran my gym when he was in college was Mark's college roommate. So when he moved into the city, he was like, Hey, give me a gym membership to his buddy. And that's where we met. And was it love at first sight?

For me, it was definitely. She was from the South. She's from Louisiana. I was born in New York City, lived in Connecticut, very Northeast upbringing. And that whole thing of opposites attract, I think was exactly what happened. And then TikTok happened. sits a track, I think was exactly what happened. And then TikTok happened. Or musically. And then everything changed. When was that first viral moment where you thought, oh, this is different? It all started to happen the summer into fall of 2019. And I started asking friends that had more knowledge than I did to find out if this is a business or if this is just a trend that we should ride and have some fun with it. But the first time I think when we're like, wow, this is odd, is when we were outside of our town, 30 miles away in New Haven, Connecticut,

we were at a pizza place and a kid walked by Charlie and was like, place and a kid walked by Charlie and was like, and I was like, do you know that person? And she's like, no. And apparently that kid had texted Charlie on TikTok and she's like, I was so embarrassed to come see you. And so that was, wow, people really know who you are now. Charlie and I came out to LA to do some interviews and she wanted to meet some people. We came out in October of 2019 and she had about 500,000 followers on TikTok. And when we got back home, she had seven and within a couple of days she had a million. And then our daughter Dixie joined. By December, they were both gaining a million followers a day. It was insanity. And we were all over the globe. Charlie and I went to

Prada. So we did that and Super Bowl and NBA All-Star. We were everywhere. All we were doing was really just trying to find what's best for Charlie and get her management and get her set up with an agent. And then next thing you know, Dixie started to become popular on social media. And we started meeting with different agencies. We met with WME. And then someone's like, UTA wants to meet with you guys.

They came to us with this whole plan that said, hey, we think this could be a family thing. We've never led this like, okay, how do we get famous as a family? I mean, it's fun and it's fine. But if it went away tomorrow, I'd be like, oh, okay, that was cool. Why do you think there is that perception? I could see how it could happen. You know that there are people that have come here with their kids and try to make it about them, and we don't. It has advantages and there's a lot of positives and we love it, but I love it because it's good for our daughters.

You don't feel like you're pushing them as stage parents? We push them to the extent as I would push a incredible pitcher who can throw a fastball at 90 miles an hour, who is kind of like, eh, I don't really feel like doing it. I'm like, well, you know, you have this opportunity, you're talented and you got this opportunity. So I push as a parent, but I

would push them if they were in college and they're like, I don't feel like taking the test tomorrow. I'd be like, well, you got to take the test. So it's got that kind of thing. I think we push strictly from a parent's perspective from what's best for them. Normally you teach your kids the value of a dollar if they have a babysitting gig or like a lemonade stand. So how do you teach your girls the value of money or what that means when so much of it is coming in? I am bad at that. I believe that money is made to be spent. And I believe that you wait for a rainy day and that rainy day might never come because you might be dead. I grew up in a single household and my mom didn't have money.

And I thought if I'm going to work my ass off that I want to give my kids what they want. And I think in some weird way, that's been a negative because I think when you get things, you lose appreciation for them. But I think Heidi's done a really great job making sure they know where I'm just like, there was no way we're driving by a Toys R Us without me pulling in. And they knew that. But before TikTok. Yes. When they were kids. So it never changed. You were just like, money is made to be spent. Because I think there's two schools of thought. I'm going to live forever and I'm going to die tomorrow. And probably the sweet spot for money is somewhere in between. But it sounds like you're on one side of the spectrum and you're on the other.

I mean, look, since my career started going, we've never been in a situation where we've spent more than we had coming in. But people who just pile up cash for some rainy day, I just never, I want to live. I want to enjoy myself. But for me, I don't think I'm ever going to stop working. So I'm just not wired that way. Like I wouldn't know what to do if I retired tomorrow. I'd go crazy. We didn't grow up with a lot of money and it was very much, I have three older sisters and my mom and dad were very much, okay, if you want this, then you have to earn the money. And I remember I saved up

probably two years for a go-kart and I was still like probably $25 short. And my dad like, don't tell your mom. And I remember it like it was yesterday and that meant so much. And so I did that with the girls. The girls had age appropriate little charts and there were chores that were non-negotiables. And then the things you could earn money for that was extra and super helpful around the house and towards the family. So it started out with just photos of whatever the chore was, and then it got more elaborate over the years, and they got it that they had to earn. But just to back up, when we started this, first person we hired was a business manager. We hired an attorney.

We have a really solid team. And I didn't want to be responsible for the kids' success or failures as it relates to their finances, but they do not spend a dime. I also think the fact that they got things that they wanted doesn't make them, there's some weird way they don't yearn for material things probably because yeah it's exactly it's yeah i would say that's yeah even yesterday we were looking for a house for charlie and i was and it wasn't what she wants like she and dixie live together now and it wasn't exactly what you want i. I'm like, you could spend a little more.

She's like, can I? And I was like, yeah, just call Ron, who's our business manager, and tell him. Or I'll call him and say, look, they don't spend money on cars. They don't spend money on, we usually go vacation twice a year. And we kind of still do that. twice a year and we kind of still do that. So I'm like, your house is your most important thing that you, you spend 99%, 95% of your time there. So make it nice. So. And so it's different, I guess, when you're buying the Toys R Us stuff and then when they're buying it. So how do you think about teaching them about saving or spending? Did all the money when they

were starting to make money, just go to them or did it get divvied out from you guys? No, it goes to the business manager. And then there's, I mean, everybody knows this. There's lawyers gets a percent, agent gets a percent, manager gets a percent, business manager gets a percent, and then they manage the money. Charlie would call me and go, dad. And it was a little different. When she started, she was 15, dad. And it was a little different. When she started, she was 15, then 16, then 17. And now 18 legally, she can do whatever she wants. And still she kind of, is this okay? I'm thinking about getting this. They're in Milan for the Prada show. And she was in the Prada store and she FaceTimed me. She was like, I'm so scared, but I had to talk to you about this. I'm like, oh my God, what happened? She was like, well, this is pretty green Prada bag.

What do you think? Should I get it? I was like, well, I mean, you're there with Prada. You should get it. And she was like, well, I was thinking if I get it, then me and you and Dixie could all use it. And then it would be like, it's less because we're going to all share. I was like, Charlie, enjoy yourself. You can afford the purse. Take it. And then it would be like, it's less because we're going to all share. I was like, Charlie, enjoy yourself.

You can afford the purse. Take it. Does it make you proud? It makes me very happy that she thinks to call us. They both do that. Dixie called about her best friend is graduating college. And she was like, how much should I spend on her graduation gift? Like, I'm just not sure.

I want to make sure she knows I'm so proud of her. Like, it was this whole conversation. That's really sweet. But she calls us for things like that because if she called her business manager, he wouldn't know how important this person is to her. He would probably say a number. I think she probably knew we'd say something a little bit more than Ron would say. He's very conservative.

But we would be more involved if they were spending recklessly. They're not. So we're just like, all right, they're good. I know that this has a potential not only not to last forever, but not to last for, it could dry up next year. And this revenue that they have has to last for them. But they're good. Do they get an allowance? Most of their stuff goes on credit cards. And they're trying to earn credit. So that's their big thing. Cause Ron explained the whole thing to them and they were like, I'm going to put this on my credit card. Cause I'm building credit mom. Yeah. I'm so proud of you that, you know, that at your age, like, you know, I'm so proud.

Everything that they buy is on a credit card. And then we get a full credit card statement, and then everybody's responsible for going through. And I ask them all the time, how are they doing spending-wise? I mean, Uber Eats, that's probably- That and Amazon is probably the most charges that they have. Hold onto your wallets. Money Rehab will be right back. One of the most stressful periods of my life was when I was in credit card debt. I got to a point where I just knew that I had to get it under control for my financial future and also for my mental health. We've all hit a point where we've realized it was time to make

some serious money moves. So take control of your finances by using a time checking account with features like no maintenance fees, fee-free overdraft up to $200, or getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit. Learn more at Chime.com slash MNN. When you check out Chime, you'll see that you can overdraft up to $200 with no fees. If you're an OG listener, you know about my infamous $35 overdraft fee that I got from buying a $7 latte and how I am still very fired up about it. If I had Chime back then, that wouldn't even be a story. Make your fall finances a little greener by working toward your financial goals with Chime. Open your account in just two minutes at Chime.com slash MNN. That's Chime.com slash MNN. Chime feels like

progress. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancorp Bank N.A. or Stride Bank N.A. I love hosting on Airbnb. It's a great way to bring in some extra cash, but I totally get it that it might sound overwhelming to start or even too complicated if, say, you want to put your summer home in Maine on Airbnb, but you live full time in San Francisco and you can't go to Maine every time you need to change sheets for your guests or something like that. If thoughts like these have been holding you back, I have great news for you. Airbnb has launched a co-host network, which is a network of high-quality local co-hosts

with Airbnb experience that can take care of your home and your guests. Co-hosts can do what you don't have time for, like managing your reservations, messaging your guests, giving support at the property, or even create your listing for you. I always want to line up a reservation for my house when I'm traveling for work, but sometimes I just don't get around to it because getting ready to travel always feels like a scramble, so I don't end up making time to make my house look guest-friendly. I guess that's the best way to put it. But I'm matching with a co-host, so I can still make that extra cash while also making it easy on myself. Find a co-host at Airbnb.com slash host.

And now for some more money rehab. Some of my entrepreneur friends have their kids negotiate for their allowances too, to teach them the power of negotiation. Did you ever think of that? Charlie is the best negotiator in the world. And the two of them together moving to LA, Dixie found the house and she went on this whole thing about why this house would work for us. And we have four dogs and all this stuff. And the two of them together and they feed off of each other. And Dixie's like, Charlie, cue the tears. Let's go. And it was like a whole thing. I'm sure you negotiate with the best of them, but then you have girls. Are you a sucker?

Yes. Oh, definitely. If they ever came to me and said, I really want this, they would get it. But look, we're not digging ditches. We're not doing manual labor, but they do work. I mean, people think that they wake up and they do a TikTok and they get paid. They're on set for sometimes 10 hours and they're flying all around and there's very busy schedules. And so I want them to celebrate and be able to buy something for their work. It's a balance, but it's also a testament to you guys

for parenting. I mean, there's so many young kids that want to be influencers. What would you say to their parents as they're starting to think through if they're bringing in money, how to handle it? I think a parent's natural reaction is to protect them and make it a negative thing. And I feel like if you could be in it with them, they need help, right? And so I'd rather be the one they're coming to to help guide than going who knows where and getting random information. So I think if you could be in it with them as much as possible without being overbearing, you have to let them do their thing. And I think we did a good job of that.

I mean, this generation just gets it. And so we never got in the way of that, the creative process, whatever. When it comes to early on, we didn't know the difference between an agent and a manager. And so we tried to educate ourselves. But my advice to parents would be, let your kids do it. Because if they're not going to be a traditional influencer, like most people think, like a Dixie or a Charlie or one of the many, they can influence in their sport. It's the currency of today. I mean, I say it all the time. It used to be, if you talk with someone and say, oh, I went to Harvard or Yale, you'd be like, wow, impressive. And all of a sudden you say,

that person's got a million followers and they're verified on all social media platforms. You're like, wow, how'd they do? It's something that I think coupled with all the traditional things, education and what you do for a job, I don't think it can hurt. I mean, I guess it can, but that's where the parents come involved. I think it can be really good for them. Yeah. There's a huge power and a huge currency. Like when Kim Kardashian was hosting SNL and she was like, I'm an influencer. It was kind of like, yeah, that there's so much value to that. And I guess it's kind of like drinking with kids too. They're going to do it anyway. You might as well teach them about it and give them your wisdom, which it sounds like you guys became smarter about and helped guide them. I think too, they've always been able to have the floor and talk to us. So I don't think when all of this happened, it was weird for them to be

coming to us like, what is happening? It was never, it was never for them to be coming to us like what is happening it was never it was never in my way or the highway house it was never everybody had a voice and that's why i think that's where charlie really got good at negotiating things it did take her a little both of them a little bit of time i mean they knew their whole lives was the four of us. That was solid. And then now you have people, lawyer, business manager, agent, manager, all of these people. So for a long time, they would still come to us with things and then we'd have to go to the team.

But I feel like they've gotten so good at talking for themselves. And I'm just so proud of them because I mean, they're young. They were like very young and everything happened fast. So they're doing so good. And that makes me super proud. Well, there are a lot of child stars that say like, oh, I wish I had a normal childhood, but I guess you don't really talk to the parents. So that's why I'm excited to talk with you guys. Like, do you miss having this normal parenthood or has this just been the ride of a lifetime? What's cool is we experienced this.

Charlie was 15 and Dixie was 18. So they did have a normal childhood for the most part. If this would have happened, Charlie was a child actor at seven or eight. That's a different ballgame. Charlie ended up going back home. Dixie went to her graduation, even though it was during COVID, high school graduation, prom. Charlie went to her prom. Her class.

Yeah. And then the things that they didn't experience is going for a lot of kids, going into college and moving into a dorm and us dropping them off. going into college and moving into a dorm and us dropping them off. But Dixie has been to her friends' colleges and has all the great experience of that without having to take a class. And they could always go back if they want to. They have that ability. So they didn't really miss out, I think. We'll see how it goes with, with Charlie, because she definitely now is,

she could either stay stuck in this childhood type thing. And she does have a lot of tendencies to like younger, what would you say? Like, what are some examples of some of the things like she likes that or. Cause she and Dixie live together. So Dixieie's like this girl buys toys all the time she's like she's a child she's constantly buying like you go to her house there's just like toys you know random whether it's stuffed animals or little those mini she likes miniature everything so like the mini toys and things like that but yeah so but we did everything we did parent teacher conferences Heidi got involved in the schools like we didn't miss out on that so we got and things like that. But we did everything. We did parent-teacher conferences. Heidi got involved in the schools.

We didn't miss out on that. So we actually had the benefit of both worlds. We got to experience a robust childhood and all that comes with that in the suburbs of Connecticut. And then we got to come to Hollywood and do all this. And Charlie has stayed connected with a little group of her high school friends. So she brings them out here all the time.

And it feels very high school as much as it can in L.A. And then when we go back, we don't see her. She's at her friend's house, sleepovers, pool, you know, hanging with their family. So she does have that feeling of even though they go back to college and she comes here, that when they're together or they're home for the summer, they get to just be teens. I guess the teens, though, have a greater scrutiny on physical appearances and the mental health toll of it as an adolescent girl. It's just more scrutiny, more comments. I mean, you went through modeling. How have you talked with the girls about that? Or what would you say to parents?

I mean, you went through modeling. How have you talked with the girls about that? Or what would you say to parents? They were dealing with that before social media. I think there's no easy answer for that. Just be there to listen. I think I tried to fix too many times. You just want them to feel better.

And Dixie, actually, when she was a little bit older, she was like, I just need you to listen to me cry and be sad and I'm going to be fine. I would argue that, yes, is it tough for Dixie and Charlie to see a negative comment get 100,000 likes? That's pretty massive. But they're smart enough to break it down and go, who is this person? Like you have no idea who they are. They might be having a bad day. Don't worry about it. What I think is harder is when you know the person who your parents are friends and it's Sally across the street being ruthless towards someone. You have to see that person every day. That to me is even worse than what we deal with. I click on the profile, like private or really? And then I go on to the next thing. Yeah. It took them a long time. All of us. Yeah. All of us to get to that point where we're like, oh my gosh, this is so stupid. But early on it was, if anybody's seen

our show season one, it was debilitating to the girls with these comments and everything. And, you know, our agent told us early on, it takes probably about five years to where you just like don't even care. And I think we've all done really good because it hasn't been five years. We're like, whatever. Hold on to your wallets. Money Rehab will be right back. And now for some more money rehab. On one of the episodes of the show, Charlie was talking about wanting to be more involved in business decisions. Has that been a way that she's regained some of her power or like how has that worked?

She could be as involved as she wants to be. I think some of the things that she wants to do, we kind of went through this thing where I want her to do her own thing. Like, I want both girls to do their own thing. I just was a parent. I just want to make sure that, A, they're ready and B, that we don't have a bunch of people around them guiding them in a direction that isn't in their best interest. And how do you guys work together? I'm definitely still in the learning phase of business, but for so long, he's taken that role of business and earning money in the family. And we're empty nesters,

obviously, and we're doing our own thing. And I'm doing my thing social media wise and that, but I'm in all the meetings and I just soaking it all in because I know to be sitting next to him, I'm going to learn the most amount. And I want to be a contributing part of this. And I think in the conversations, I come from a different perspective, which I think adds value that he might not be thinking of on the business side. So my favorite thing is I'll bring up a point and he was like, that was really good. And I'm like, wait, that means so much. I get like nervous and like excited because that means so much coming from him because he's done a really good job of earning money for our family all these years. So anything I can do to help, I want to,

but I do know my limitations and I'm still learning. But it's been great. Like anything I can do to help, I want to, but I do know my limitations and I'm still learning. But it's been great. Like when I was running my showroom and sales agency in New York City, she wasn't involved at all really. And now she definitely does contribute and I need someone. This isn't just business, this is business in Hollywood and everybody is trying to get a piece of something, either it's the girls or everybody has an ulterior motive. And it's great to have family around you. And I think she sells herself short on her ability to help and contribute. And it's been awesome. Like she's by far the biggest supporter of the footwear of our footwear brand from a modeling side, from the spokesperson side, from thinking outside,

from, from getting involved in this, in the styling, why are we doing this? It's just been the development, every part of it. And I couldn't be happier about like, it's, it's really easy. I think the only issue we have is taking the business home with us. Sometimes we started doing that with the girls earlier on. We're all on our phones talking about like, oh, did you see this video? And it always ends up going to business. Even the girls are vocal about it. Like, I don't want to do this. This is family time, no business talk. And so when it starts, we're like, oh, wait, I can't believe I'm doing that. And we'll like shut it down. But then he and I would still do it.

And so now we're getting really good at it. That happened yesterday. You're like, oh, wait, I can't believe I'm doing that. And we'll like shut it down. But then he and I would still do it. And so now we're getting really good at it. That happened yesterday. You're like, oh, I'm not doing this. I'm not going on this road. We're not talking about business. Okay. It sounds like it's been a journey. It's no surprise you guys had some marital problemos during the Dancing with the Stars time. And did I get it right that it's from a work-life dynamic that started some issues? I mean, it came across as marital problems. And did I get it right that it's from a work-life dynamic that started something issues? I mean, it came across as marital problems. And I think one of the things that people don't really believe is that we have an incredible marriage and we actually love each other and like to be around each other, which I think is rare for couples. And for me, all of a sudden, it wasn't about her dancing or being on

Dancing with the Stars. It'd be just her not being there. And I was kind of more in the mode of like, I kind of was thinking we're going to be settling down and taking a step back. And now I'm like, it was more about just a perfect negative situation for me. I moved to LA. I'm an East Coast guy. All my friends and family are in the East Coast. Heidi was doing Dancing with the Stars and Charlie too. So I didn't really have access to Charlie or Heidi. You're lonely. Dixie and I were together.

But look, the show wanted to position it in a way and make it seem not even make it seem we definitely did have issues, but it was issues based off of my love for my wife and love for what we had. And me, you know, not really ever dealing with that. And I will admit that I was really immature and it made a lot of Heidi super focused. You know, Heidi's super focused. So Heidi gets involved in something and she can't be like, okay, I'm going to make sure that this is going well over here and make sure, you know, and I was probably just being a dumb guy and feeling a little bit vulnerable. And it was a perfect storm. We moved here.

My daughter just moved out of the house. My wife wasn't there. I started a business. I'm building an office in West Hollywood by myself, putting desks together. I'm like, dude, where's my life going right now? I probably didn't handle it the best that I could. What do you wish you did different? The problem with Dancing with the Stars is it never ends.

Well, if you're good, it ends in 10 weeks. If you're lucky. If she would have ran a marathon, I would be like, all right, New York marathon. She's going to be running for six weeks. And on this day it's over. Like you never knew when the thing was over. And I'm like, all right, well, I'm going to get my wife back this week. And she's amazing. So that's the hardest part, right? So you have to support and you want to support, but then you're also there's this thing where you're just like feeling.

And look, I just think it was a rough patch in my life. And I didn't know, I probably should have called someone and be like, hey, what should I expect during this thing? We knew that it was going to be a lot of work for her. But afterwards we met other people that were like, yeah, dude, I lost my wife for like 10 weeks. It was terrible. And even a woman was like, yeah, my husband was totally not into it. And it wasn't about

Artem was incredible. I'm good friends with all the guys in the cast. He's also really hot. Yeah, he is. So did that bother you? Yeah. No, I'm pretty good looking myself. I don't need to stop. It was never about that. It was just more about her not being around and me not being mature enough to say, I think she would have had a career and she would have been out of the house early on. But it was always there, always having her around and not having, what is it?

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. I found that out. Definitely. Just like your emotional support human. Yeah. Are you having a midlife crisis? No, I don't think so. And I don't have hobbies really.

Like people golf, I don't golf. So I didn't really have much to do. And how have you thought of this post-dancing with the stars is like having your own name, having your own career? Well, dancing with the stars is insane and so hard. But for me personally, the journey of being the stay-at-home mom, supporting role, and then when you're doing Dance With The Stars, not only are you on the dance floor and you can't hide behind your family, then you have to get the judges that are coming at you.

Then you go upstairs, Alfonso's firing off questions, live TV, all this, and there's nowhere to hide. And I think for me, as hard as physically Dancing with the Stars, that was the hardest part. And I think fast forward where I ended up, Dancing with the Stars, our marriage, my progress as a human, I think eventually I would have gotten there, but it was condensed in eight weeks. And so I'm so happy with how I've grown. I'm so happy how we've grown and where we are now. I don't know if we would have gotten here had we not gone through that. I'm so thankful for it in a weird way. It sucked and I'd never want to go through that again, but it just brought us to a new place. And so I just feel so much more

confident, not just in things maybe I've done before, but just all the new things coming at us and business where I've always been like, oh, I don't know. I don't know. Well, I can learn and I'm going to learn. And so I'm right here and I'm with you. So I'm really happy with where I am now personally and where we are. Yeah. I didn't understand that part of it. And I think that's the big thing. It had nothing to do with dancing with the stars. It could have been anything. It was just like, wait, why are you doing this? We have this great thing going on. I'm not enough, but I've done so many things. I had a career.

I've done these things, not necessarily taking the back seat, but watch me do this. And then I really had to put myself in her shoes and say, imagine if I was the stay-at-home parent. And I kind of put, remember, she started off with all these goals and aspirations and dreams, ultimately wanted to be a wife and a mom, but kind of put those things on hold in New York City more quickly. And then once I started looking at it from that perspective, I don't ever regret because like Heidi said, I think the fact that we went through this, we found this appreciation we knew we had,

but it really bubbled to the surface and we really got to go, oh, after 23 years, I'm still really in love with this woman. But that was not like, why are you doing Dancing with the Stars? Like, well, what are you searching for? I had probably more things that made me content than she did. And now I'm looking at it and it was a learning experience. But I think it was at 24 years of marriage to have that and come out of the other side feeling stronger. I think it was great. And now do you find it sexy or attractive that she's coming into her power on her own in business and in her own brand? Absolutely. I mean, I don't want to say traditional women's jobs, men's jobs, whatever, but Heidi was a stay at home mom. That job is incredibly difficult.

But Heidi was a stay-at-home mom. That job is incredibly difficult. I would not trade that for the world. And she did an incredible job. She was the Michael Jordan of moms, bringing out two strong, really cool, incredibly beautiful, talented women. But for me, I always wanted to help. It's not easy to have a lot of the burden of the family on your shoulders. And now it's kind of, I feel like she always had the ability to do it. I don't

think she had the confidence to do something. And I would bring her something and say, hey, we're making this decision. What do you think? And now it's like, hey, we're making this decision. What do you think? And I loved every aspect of it. I loved how she was able to speak in front of the camera. That's a hard thing to do, to learn all those dances, practice it, execute it, then have the cameras on you, lights on you, talk about it. And then afterwards there's press. And she did that for 10 weeks straight. It was amazing. And it's definitely translated to our home now and how we do things. It sounds like you've reframed it. You're a little lonely for a amazing. And it's definitely translated to our home now and how we do things. It sounds like you've reframed it. You're a little lonely for a second. And then you're like,

I had three bosses around me. Yeah, I really did. That's a moment that should be a pride. Yeah. And I think there was an aspect of sometimes when Heidi would do something, Charlie and I would be like this and we would go to rides together. So I basically lost out of the four of us, the three most important people, Dix Charlie and I would be like this and we would go to rides together. So I basically lost out of the four of us, the three most important people, Dixie and I were together a lot, but I lost two out of the three for 10 weeks. And look, I'm sure people listening to this would be like, dude, you're being overdramatic right now. And right now I agree. But when you're going through it, there's no end in sight. And you're like, where were the dogs?

They were there. They don't talk. They were just like, dude, what's wrong with you? And then we had all of them. And then they get sad, too. They're like, hey, where's that lady that usually hangs out and feeds us? I'm like, Heidi? They're like, yeah, she's dancing with the stars with Charlie.

So everybody was, everyone around me was depressed. Have you found that now being such strong business partners on the other side of it has made you stronger romantic partners too? I think so. Yeah. I think if I could go back, I wouldn't change anything, but we very much had our rules. And I think combining and sharing the home responsibilities and sharing the income responsibilities is important to balance the relationship. I feel like my things were super important. His things were super important. We just didn't share in those feelings of that. And we got there. in those feelings of that. And we got there. You got to work on it. You have to set boundaries and we're not perfect at it. You definitely, it's hard to sit there and deal with some

issue in an office and then go home and, Hey, let's light the candles and have a romantic dinner. But you have to learn to turn the page. And then you have to do things that, you know, not necessarily like people are always like, do you have date night? But we definitely have to plan things and do like we said, just like, hey, we're not going to talk about work. It's not easy. Yeah. Do you have date night?

Well, we have a date day on Saturday. It's all timing. Okay. For all you married people. Monday was not a good day to bring up that Saturday. We have a full day date and it's a surprise. So I can't tell him what it is. And he was already stressing about it.

I can tell. I don't even have to look at it. So I put it out there because I was trying to make plans. And then he was like, well, okay, but all day. And I'm like, trust me, we're going to have a good day

and you're going to enjoy it. So I know when that day comes, we're going to have a great day, but he's going to probably be stressing about a little bit and then appreciate that we took that day to do that. Yeah. And we just got back. We went, Heidi got me then appreciate that we took that day to do that. Yeah.

And we just got back. We went, Heidi got me for my birthday. We did a weekend at a car auction because I watch these car auctions on YouTube. And that was cool. Every time we do something new together, it's fun. It's like, we've never done this. I think that keeps it fresh and new and fun and exciting in our marriage. Where do you see your family in 10 years? Well, I brought up grandkids the other day

and both of my kids were like, what are you talking about? I was like, okay, sorry. I wasn't talking about anytime soon. I don't know. Do you think we're still living here? I would love to have a situation, not necessarily, could be in LA, but more of a rural not a farm but just kind of like a place where we have more space

and more land and people could come in and maybe a little bit more seasons and i miss my garden i'm interested to see like what the girls do i'm interested to see what the girls do. I'm interested to see if Dixie will move back to... She keeps talking about New York. I can't really get a gauge on whether Charlie likes LA long-term, whether we both all go back to these coasts. I can't imagine a world of us not living near each other. Yeah. We'll end the episode by asking for a tip that listeners can take straight to the bank.

I'd love to ask both of you just for a final tip on what you would say to parents about teaching their kids about business and money. To teach them and teach it in an age-appropriate way. I mean, my kids knew how to clip coupons and do all that at a very young age. And this was something that we did is we gave them a debit card and they got that much money on it, whatever it was. And they were pretty young. If they went to birthday parties or wanted any toys, go to the movies or whatever, they had to pay for it themselves. They had to learn how to make it last. The first week they spent it all in two days and then they're like, wait a minute, I'm going to a birthday party and now I can't buy anything. So

I think that was super important. And they got the app on their phone and it was Bank of America. They didn't know that they called it the BOFA. And they're, and so they still have those accounts. I still have, they've asked me to transfer money to those accounts recently. They still have those debit cards. So that was something, but we did age appropriate things all along the way. And then when we were like, let's do this, I thought that was a big learning lesson. I would say, don't underestimate the fact that your kids are listening. I've witnessed this in how they treat people in restaurants, and they've seen how Heidi and I handle ourselves. And from a business side, because I worked at home and I was involved in sales, I do think when I was joking around

about Charlie having these negotiating skills, I do think they picked them up from being around me. So I think when you sit down and you say, this is what you should be doing and this is why you should be doing it. I think if you lead by example, that will rub off on them. And that's definitely worked. I think it was easier because you were at home. Not everybody works from home, so they don't see those skills. And when you're home, you're just like parent, but they were very lucky to have you there. Yeah, they see you through osmosis.

Like when people ask me, how do I teach my kids to be financially literate? I'm like, are you? Yeah. Because they're watching. They're watching how you spend, save, tip. And your relationship with it. Are you scared? Are you scared?

It's you're not going to have enough. It's good to be thoughtful and save, but not scared. I have people in my life that are scared. Not Mark though. You know what? I do think I want to change my answer from the first part of this. I think the fact that I'm in sales always gives me the ability to make money. And the fact that anytime I've ever worried about money, I've always just been able to go out and make what I needed. I often say you can always get more money. There's always more money to be had.

You can't get more time. Yes. That's right. Money Rehab is a production of Money News Network. I'm your host, Nicole Lappin. Money Rehab's executive producer is Morgan Lavoie. Our researcher is Emily Holmes. Do you need some money rehab? And

let's be honest, we all do. So email us your money questions, moneyrehab at moneynewsnetwork.com to potentially have your questions answered on the show or even have a one-on-one intervention with me. And follow us on Instagram at moneynews and TikTok at moneynewsnetwork for exclusive video content. And lastly, thank you. No, seriously, thank you. Thank you for listening and for investing in yourself, which is the most important investment you can make.