Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin - Nicole tells listener to call off her wedding! Here's why.

Episode Date: July 20, 2021

Honestly, the episode title says it all. This is one you have to hear to believe. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Well, it doesn't. Charge for wasting our time. I will take a check. Like an old school check. You recognize her from anchoring on CNN, CNBC, and Bloomberg. The only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand. Nicole Lappin. One of my absolute favorite parts of money rehab is having listeners come on the show

for interventions. As we all know, the first step to any recovery is admitting you have a problem. And that is definitely true of the road to financial recovery. But don't get me wrong, I am fully aware that this shit is hard. So I do want to take a moment to give shout outs to the wonderful money rehabbers who have been brave enough to come on the show, take the first step on their road to recovery and talk through their financial challenges. To these people, I am so super duper proud of you, and I am honored to be on this journey with you. And speaking of people I'm proud of,

today I'm talking to a listener who sent me an email with the subject line, wanna be a rich bitch. So I was a big fan of hers from the jump. She's been struggling with the holy trinity of debt, credit cards, student loans, and car payments, and wants to get into better financial shape while also planning a wedding, buying a house, and trying to get pregnant. But I'll let her catch you up on the rest. Morgan, welcome to Money Rehab. Hi, how are you? I hear you want to be a rich bitch. I do. I wouldn't mind. Tell me what's been going on. Basically, the gist of it is I feel like I

have a lot of debt, just like credit card debt, debt from like school. And then my my so my husband and I are are already married like legally um but we didn't do like a whole wedding like ceremony and everything um so we were planning to do that this past October of 2020 and ended up pushing it back to this year because of COVID um so now we have that added into the mix as far as like paying things. And I didn't work for almost all of 2020. Part of it was because of COVID and part of it was because we moved just as COVID started. There was kind of just like a lot going on. So you have how much in credit card debt and how much in student loans? So in credit card debt, I, I think it's around 20,000. Um, so I have the bulk of it is on one credit card. Um, and it's a pretty high interest rate, uh, or like APR. So I tried to do a balance transfer to a different credit card with a different bank

and I think that that was beneficial for me it at least got like a couple thousand off of that credit card and it's a much it's actually zero percent APR for I think 18 months. So I have that off of it. And then I have a third credit card, which was originally our wedding credit card. And now because it is still lower APR than the other one that I have, the main one, I've kind of started to turn that into my main one. So that's kind of where that's at. And then eventually my husband and I would also like to buy a home. So I kind of have that going on in the back of my mind. We have a little bit of a savings, but I'm kind of trying to use that for our wedding. Wait, you have savings?

Yeah. And you have credit card debt? savings and you have credit card debt? Yeah. So it's kind of my, like, in case I don't have like cash cash, I can get into my savings or for, um, our wedding payments. We have a few like bigger wedding payments that are coming up. Um, and especially since it's getting so close to the wedding, I'm kind of everything is kind of going to be due at once. So I have money in my savings for that as kind of like my backup. OK, so let me get this straight. So you have $16,000 in credit card debt. You have $17,000 in student loans.

You have a $20,000 wedding coming up. Yes. You have how much in savings? I think it's about $3,000. And how much do you owe on the wedding? I believe $12 thousand. And where is that coming from? So some of it is from the savings. Some of it I was going to put on another credit card. Well, like one of the credit cards that I have, I'm not going to open another credit card. And then my parents are hoping to pay for some of it as well. Okay. And you have a $400 car payment. You're not making any money. Your husband is in the army stationed in North Carolina from California. And you guys move every couple of years?

So this is his first, I guess it's his second year in the army. But since we've been married, like this is the, like we haven't moved before. This was our first move. And so I didn't work most of 2020. And then I did get a job recently at the beginning of 2021. But it's kind of just like a part time, it's part time to full time kind of. Because some employers feel like you're going to be moving around a lot, so they don't want to make the investment on you. That's kind of the feeling that I get because I feel like the interviews go really well. And you live in military housing now?

Yes. So you don't pay for housing? Correct. Which is really helpful. We don't pay for housing or utilities. So what is your biggest question? Because I have many thoughts. Oh, I think what is the best way to prioritize paying off your debt while saving, while trying to pay for a wedding? A mishmash of all of that so how do I fix your

financial life essentially basically yeah gotcha are you down for some tough love yes is your heart set on having this wedding I mean at this point, because I've already kind of invested a lot into it time-wise and financially. Is your heart set on having this wedding right now? So we also want to start having kids soon. And the goal was supposed to be last year, And the goal was supposed to be last year right after the wedding. And now we had to push it back another year. So I guess I don't want to push it back again. I feel like that's the main reason is because I would like to start having kids.

Do you need a wedding before you have kids? No, but I just feel like it would be more stressful with a baby or if you're pregnant. I don't want to do it while I'm pregnant, basically. But with a baby, I don't know, maybe it would be more difficult. How do you feel about scaling back this wedding? The reason I ask is because you're spending a lot of money on this wedding and i see this a lot with young couples just going crazy on the party and i get it we've been cooped up uh you guys have already been technically married but you want to celebrate and it's a beautiful time in your life i totally totally, I am not like the fun police or the

wedding police by any stretch of the imagination, but I also want you to reach your financial goals. And so I think it's really important to think hard about what you want more and you're not going to be able to have all of the things. When you say it that way like as a party it sounds not as important um so no I guess it's it's not as high of a priority but it's kind of just been on my mind constantly for the last like two years because we had started planning it before because we were going to have it last year. And so I was basically halfway through all of that planning process and then everything stopped. And so now it like started picking back up again. And so now I feel like I'm almost at the tail end

of it. Have you committed to all these vendors? Yes. Do you have contracts? Yes. Do you have some time to negotiate out of contracts? Do you want me to be on the phone with you to negotiate out of contracts? Potentially, because the thought of it being a contract in my mind was just like, I'm stuck. And it's a contract like it is what it is. And it's a contract like it is what it is. And so negotiating out of it isn't really something I thought that I would have the option to do. I've never been in the position where I'm actually telling a person to cancel a wedding. But I'm kind of telling you to cancel your wedding. I hate that those words have come out of my mouth.

telling you to cancel your wedding. Okay. I hate that those words have come out of my mouth, but I think given your financial picture and your goals, I think that your future self is going to thank your 27-year-old self now for saving that $20,000 on a party and flowers and food for people who love you already and you guys are already married. And using that money to pay down a bunch of credit card debt you have and not getting into more credit card debt and having some peace of mind for a baby and their future and how much everything baby-related costs, and not being stressed with that. I don't know what's more stressful. I've not been in this position, but I would venture to guess that not being able to pay for a baby is probably more stressful than planning a wedding

and having a baby. My suggestion to you, if I were you, and I know what I know now, because when I was 27, I didn't know what I know now. So don't beat yourself up for it and thank you for asking for help and that is fucking awesome because it's really, really hard to ask for help and you're doing the right thing. My suggestion is to really think hard about this wedding. I think it's a much better investment

in your marriage and your future family to use that money toward other things. I think you need to table the thought and discussion about buying a house right now. Your husband's in the military. As far as you guys know, he could be moving around every few years. That's why you've had trouble finding a job in that area because of that possibility. If you guys are going to be moving and you have free housing, there is no reason to be thinking about buying a house right now. So I would just take that off the table right now. I would just take that out of your mind. I think that there are a lot of places that will hire you as a military spouse.

In addition to Squared Away, there are sites like Fiverr, there are sites like Upwork, other freelancing sites. Maybe you can do remote landscape design for people. Everything has gone remote anyway. If I were you, I would focus my energy in getting a great virtual gig right now that gives you some job security, gives you more money than what you're making part time at the sporting goods store. I would table the wedding discussion right now. And I know that's not your favorite thing to hear.

It's not my favorite thing to say. I am happy to. I, as my wedding present to you, will be on the phone. We can record them. And if we get permission, we can even use them on the show. But if not, just so I know you're being helped and you have more peace of mind around this really big decision, I would suggest moving it, not doing it right now, using the money that you make with a better online job and with the savings you have to pay off the highest interest rate credit card you have right now. If you do a balance transfer, you have to pay that off really quick or otherwise the interest rate is going to spike. So I don't know what exact balance transfer you've been looking at. I'd love to take a closer look at that. But the highest interest rate credit card is what you need to tackle first.

Okay. And then from there, do you know all of the interest rates on your credit cards? You said there are three of them. Yeah. So one of them is 23%, which I know is pretty high um and then the second one is 18 percent and then the third one i don't use it's it just only has the balance transfer on it so for right now, for the first 18 months, it's 0%. Okay. So I would start with the 23%. I would potentially pause on your student loans. I'm assuming that's way lower. Yes. Yeah. Credit card debt is the nastiest kind of debt. It grows out of control.

Hold onto your wallets, boys and girls. Money rehab will be right back. Boys and girls, money rehab will be right back. Now for some more money rehab. I will pause and check in. How do you feel? So as far as tabling the wedding, what if I just made it a lot smaller? Okay, like how small? Maybe. So right now we have 70. we're expecting about 70 people. So if I maybe narrowed it down

to half of that. I hear your counter point. And I would say that I will give you my blessing to do a small wedding that does not deplete all of your savings. So I would if you want to do fifteen hundred dollars and whatever your parents are giving you, I fully endorse it. In fact, I will come out to North Carolina if you want and I will be the officiant. I'm doing it in California, actually. Oh, you are? Yeah. OK, then I'm inviting myself over. Okay, perfect. So if you can keep it, I want you to still have some savings in the bank. I think it's, you know, it's not ideal to have credit card debt with savings in the bank, but during COVID and

having a little bit of an emergency fund, I think, is really important. So can we scale it back to something very, very DIY? Yeah. Having just like something because I already have my dress. So having something. Are you going to sell your dress later? I hadn't thought about it, but I could. Are you going to wear it again? No, probably not.

How do we feel about finding a better online job? I would really like that just because of the convenience of it. And I'm a homebody anyway, so it's kind of perfect for me. And I'm pretty self-sufficient, so I feel like that would be a good option for me. And I'm pretty self-sufficient. So I feel like that would be a good option for me. Okay. So we have a deal that the wedding is going to be super, super, super shoestring budget. You're going to be stunning and running around the backyard or whatever in your beautiful dress, but all the other things are going to be bare bones. For today's tip, you can take straight to the bank. You can't silo your expenses. The financial you that is getting married is not different from

the financial you that is paying off student loans. The pieces of your financial puzzle make up one picture. So you need to make sure that you're looking at your whole financial picture, even when you're only planning one piece of it. You need to make sure that piece fits and makes a beautiful financial picture overall. So before you commit to putting money down on a dream, evaluate how that fits in with other financial commitments that you have in your life. Don't say never, but you might need to say later to actually live that dream. And that's okay. Money Rehab is a production of iHeart Media. I'm your host, Nicole Lappin. Our producers are Morgan Lavoie and Catherine Law. Money Rehab is

edited and engineered by Brandon Dickert with help from Josh Fisher. Executive producers are Mangesh Hatikadur and Will Pearson. Huge thanks to the OG Money Rehab supervising producer, Michelle Lanz, for her pre-production and development work. And as always, thanks to you for finally investing in yourself so that you can get it together and get it all.