Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin - Paige Adams-Geller, Founder, on Overcoming Financial Trauma and Creating a Denim Empire
Episode Date: June 10, 2023Originally aired 3.21.21 Fashion mogul and denim maven Paige Adams-Gellar (yes, the creator of PAIGE jeans) discuss how she built her business by trusting her gut, literally working through trauma, an...d the power of asking for help.
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I love hosting on Airbnb. It's a great way to bring in some extra cash.
But I totally get it that it might sound overwhelming to start, or even too complicated,
if, say, you want to put your summer home in Maine on Airbnb, but you live full-time in San
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I always want to line up a reservation for my house when I'm traveling for work,
but sometimes I just don't get around to it because getting ready to travel always feels like a scramble, so I don't end up making time to make
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Airbnb.com slash host. Hey, money rehabbers. I just wanted to give you a heads up that there
are stories of sexual assault in today's episode.
So please take care while listening.
Do you think the whole world revolves around you and your money? Well, it doesn't.
Charge for wasting our time.
I will take a check.
Like an old school check.
You recognize her from anchoring on CNN, CNBC, and Bloomberg.
The only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand.
Nicole Lappin.
As you know, every Friday we talk with a celebrity,
a public figure making change in every sense of the word, and along the way has been in or is still in money rehab. So today I'm talking with Paige Adams Geller. Paige started her self-titled
clothing brand, Paige. I'm sure you've seen it or worn it or both. She is smart, talented. She's a total boss bitch kicking
ass. But her journey to get where she is now has been difficult. When it came to starting her
career, she was confronted with two ghosts, the memory of her family filing bankruptcy
and her sexual assault. Money is linked to every part of our lives, and it can really affect our
ability to feel
in control of what's happening around us.
I've found that money can either empower someone to heal from trauma or stall the process.
So today I wanted to talk with Paige about how she worked through her trauma, literally
and figuratively, and what advice she would give anyone else who has their own financial
ghosts to confront.
Paige, welcome to Money Rehab.
Thank you so much. So in the beginning of our episodes, we do a quick round of Money Rehab,
Never Have I Ever. You got it. I'll ask you a question about your finances,
and you can tell me if you have or you haven't made this money move.
All right. Never have I ever sold a stock.
Never.
You haven't? You just keep them long term? Yes.
We invest very safely and things have been going well. So we've been keeping them the way they are.
So, so far, so good.
Rich bitch. Never have I ever played the
lottery. No, I've never played the lottery. Never have I ever written a will or trust.
I have. Like a boss. Never have I ever pitched an investor. I have definitely pitched an investor.
Successfully. Successfully. So grateful. And
that's how Paige was started, partially. So tell me how Paige was started. I had been working
in the industry in LA, in the entertainment industry, singing and modeling and acting
and doing a bunch of different things. And I also thought that I
might be a talk show host someday. So that was my major in college was communications and broadcast
journalism. But before I was going down that route, I was singing, acting and modeling and
doing all different kinds of things. And long story short, it ended up being an industry that wasn't very healthy for me due
to a lot of different things that happened in my life.
And I ended up going to speak to a life coach when I had hit rock bottom and really needed
to get some help.
And through all the questions she asked me, she said, oh my God, you love empowering women.
You love fashion.
You've worked so long also as a fit model that you know
everything on the inside of the industry. It's like you've taken fashion 101 as your work on
a daily basis. And she's like, what if you were to start your own company? And what would that
look like if you had your own fashion company? And so I came home, my wheels started spinning and it was that aha moment.
I didn't think I could do it because I didn't go to business school. I had never started my
own company, but that OMG aha moment happened. And I was like, this seems like everything that
I love wrapped up into one package. And we launched the first capsule of Paige at the Coterie Trade Show in September 2004.
It happened in warp speed and I've never looked back.
You have long inspired me as an entrepreneur, as a philanthropist, as an advocate for women.
You've been so open and talking about your eating disorder.
You've been open about sexual assault.
Your father went through bankruptcy.
A lot of us have financial traumas, but we don't know that those are financial traumas. And
sometimes those can stand in the way of us getting to the other side of that.
It's kind of crazy. A lot of people think that, oh, you know, how did she start a business?
You have to have money. And how did this actually, how did this happen a business? You have to have money. How did this happen? Maybe she married
somebody wealthy and this and that and all of those noises that we hear. I grew up in Alaska
in a little tiny town in the middle of nowhere. My parents were entrepreneurs. The economy crashed
in Alaska because of the oil industry. And the little town that I grew up
in, everyone basically went bankrupt and there was nothing that my parents could do. And this was
right when I was starting school at USC. And I was 16 years old, I graduated high school young.
And I'll never forget my parents saying that
we lost our home in Alaska, that I wasn't going to be going back and that I couldn't stay at school
at USC anymore because they couldn't afford it. And everything just came crashing down. And I was
like, oh my God, but my education is everything to me. Like I need to be in school. I love USC.
education's everything to me. Like I, I need to be in school. I love USC. This is the perfect place for me. What am I going to do? And I quickly applied for all of the different kinds of
scholarships that I could apply for. And luckily I was able to stay at USC on academic scholarship
and get some student loans that I needed just for my cost of living, guaranteed student loans.
that I needed just for my cost of living, guaranteed student loans. And that though,
was the beginning of me learning about being frugal with money, figuring out ways of finding money when I needed to find it. And my father went through such a bitter depression and was so,
I think his confidence was just demolished. And he felt that he wasn't the father that he always wanted to be.
And I realized at that moment in time too, that I never wanted to depend on a man for money.
Yes. And I'm like, if I'm going to do this, I need to do this myself. And I'm going to be
successful no matter what I do and be self-reliant. So it was a big learning and a big trauma, but something life-changing.
But I don't know if I would be where I am today if I hadn't had that experience. So I'm not going
to look back and say I wish it didn't happen because I'm proud of everything I learned in
that process. Well, I have chills. I didn't live through it, of course, but I've had my own
financial trauma. I remember not being able to flush the toilet unless it was number two to save on water growing up or turn off the lights to save on electricity bills.
And recently my partner was like, why do you leave the lights on all the time?
And I'm like, because I can now.
And I didn't actually realize that that had such an effect on me.
But it's natural because it is a trauma and a lot of times traumas that happen
reoccur to us throughout our lives.
Yeah, and it's so important to figure out what those triggers are because it's not
that they never come back. It's that you can recognize them when they do.
And I'm assuming that that was just on steroids as a entrepreneur or as you were
growing your business. My biggest fear and trauma with becoming an entrepreneur was that I'm not
good enough. I'm not smart enough. And like, I don't know what I'm doing. And, you know, I think
some of the other traumas that affected me along the way too is eating disorder is a common aftermath of being a survivor of rape because some people overeat, some people want to disappear.
And I wanted to disappear.
I can find sometimes when I'm really stressed out that I can go back into some of those control issues and really want to try to control
everything.
And that's an aftermath of this.
And it's going to be something that I'll battle with for the rest of my life.
But luckily, most of the time, almost all the time, I'm completely in a healthy state
because I've done so much work.
But that affects my business, too, because I still try on all the clothes and I want
to make sure that things fit right.
And I always want to keep my weight
in check and stay healthy. But that's another thing that can come back to haunt me if I'm not
being mindful and taking care of myself. We'll be right back for some more money rehab.
I love hosting on Airbnb. It's a great way to bring in some extra cash. But I totally get it
that it might sound overwhelming to start or even too complicated if, say, you want to put your summer home in Maine on Airbnb,
but you live full time in San Francisco and you can't go to Maine every time you need to change
sheets for your guests or something like that. If thoughts like these have been holding you back,
I have great news for you. Airbnb has launched a co-host network, which is a network of high
quality local co-hosts with Airbnb experience
that can take care of your home and your guests. Co-hosts can do what you don't have time for,
like managing your reservations, messaging your guests, giving support at the property,
or even create your listing for you. I always want to line up a reservation for my house when
I'm traveling for work, but sometimes I just don't get around to it because getting ready to travel
always feels like a scramble, so I don't end up making time to make my house look guest-friendly. I guess that's the best way
to put it. But I'm matching with a co-host so I can still make that extra cash while also making
it easy on myself. Find a co-host at Airbnb.com slash host. Now for some more money rehab.
I have a girlfriend who's an entrepreneur and she was also a victim of sexual assault.
And something reopened the case, and she was triggered, and she felt like she could compartmentalize, leave that at home.
And she found herself in her office, like, having this total trauma response, hiding behind a chair.
She didn't even understand that it was connected.
But she just assumed that that was
my personal life and this is my work life and they're separate, but they're not.
They're not. No, they're so not. You know, I was a victim of a survivor, let's say a survivor of
rape at the age of 16. And it was a secret that I kept and didn't tell anyone for 13 years. And what I can tell about
that part of my story and what I do want to share is a reoccurring trauma that I have and trigger
that I have is after the assault and before the assault, I was stalked and my phone in my room
would ring repeatedly by this person and it would just ring,
ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. And because it was its own phone number, my parents didn't
know. And I'd unplug the phone and didn't want to listen to it. It happened before the rape and
after the rape. And to this day, my phone is almost always on silent because I can't stand the sound of phones ringing too much. Like it really
makes me uncomfortable. And you know, some of, some of that, you know, is, are some of the things
that affect me in business because people be like, why do you never have your phone on? Like,
why do you like, I was trying to reach you. And it's like, Hey, you know what? I'm going to pay
attention to the task at hand. When I'm ready to answer phone calls, I'll look at my phone and see who's called me or text me and then go back to what I'm
doing in the present moment. But that's how I work best. I can't handle that. It just can't.
And I can't still. But hey, it's okay because it hasn't stopped me from being able to manage my
business. Yeah. It sounds like you've created great boundaries and it's not like you have to tell people, hey, I'm turning off my phone because of this. It's like none of your business. Yeah, it sounds like you've created great boundaries. And it's not like
you have to tell people, hey, I'm turning off my phone because of this. It's like none of your
business. I'm turning off my phone. That is my boundary. I am Paige. My name is on your jeans.
You're welcome. And, you know, you sort of learn how to dance with a limp like it never really
goes away. And, you know, just we all have something. And I think the only problem
we can't fix is the one we don't admit we have. That is so true. Secrets make you sick. And
if you keep it inside and you don't admit it, it's going to just show up in all, manifest in
all different kinds of nasty ways, like imposter syndrome. And that's a scary feeling. It's like going down that rabbit hole
of self-doubt. And I would say it out loud and talk about it. I mean, sometimes I wouldn't.
Sometimes I go through the uncomfortable ickiness of feeling like shit for a while and then going,
okay, I got to get out of this. This is ridiculous. I'm in my head too much. I am obsessing. I am going down a slippery slope and this isn't healthy. And so I got to get this off
my chest. And so I would ask for help, speak out loud, talk about it. And it would be so funny
because even if I talked to some of the most successful people I know, they'd be like, oh my
God, I feel like that every single day.
Are you kidding? And then as soon as you hear that, you're like, oh, whoa, I feel so much better.
Like you, you really, you really feel that way. And then it's like, oh, okay. I'm not alone.
This is natural. This is part of the process. We're all going to have these feelings of
insecurity and doubt. Totally. A hundred percent. I think that everybody has that mean girl or that mean guy
inside their head, no matter what level of success you're at, no matter how many zeros
are in your bank account. And I think it's just recognizing that they're there saying,
hey, what's up, when they come up at weird times. Like, hey, imposter syndrome, nice to see you
again. I remember what you're like, hey, bankruptcy trauma, what's up? Like, you're
going to be here for a little while. And I have to remember to be kind and loving towards myself
and say that it's okay to feel this way and then, you know, press on. But yeah, those monsters come
in, they still come in. And I just have to tell them they're not
invited. And then I'll listen to the Alanis Morissette song, You're Uninvited.
How have you worked through some of that?
A lot of therapy and I'm proud to say it. I've been in therapy for 20 some odd years now.
I really think that it's important to get things off your chest and really
talk through things. If you can't understand what's going on when you're feeling certain
feelings to have that professional be able to go, but that's your little girl. That's your trauma.
That's happening again. And this is a pattern and let's work on getting you through the other side.
So therapies helped me a lot. And I definitely do a lot of meditation and get out in nature and
hike. I'll listen to some podcasts. I'll, you know, do anything that I can do to kind of get out of,
out of my head. And music is another great way I get out of my head. You know, I've got different
playlists for, you know, like I'm sure everybody does for every different kind of mood you could
be in. But like, you know, if I've got a scary bank meeting or something that I need to like get ready for, it's like,
I'm going to play my power list, like my powerful diva songs that make me feel badass. And I'm going
to walk in there and ask for what I need and be strong. Yeah. It's your own little pregame. It's
like your own little Rocky stairs that you're doing. Oh, I love that. It really does change. If you're in this funk,
there are skills that you can learn to get you out of your funk. It's not like you're alone.
We all get in funks, but we can learn these skills to get us out of them.
Yeah. The one thing I would want to say is I am just so proud of our team that we've built.
I want to say thank you to everyone who's been a
part of Paige for these 17 years and who's believed in Paige for these almost 17 years.
To anyone else listening, I just want you to know that you have the power to do this. Like,
I'm a little small town girl from the middle of nowhere in Alaska who didn't know anything about
the fashion business, didn't go to business school, and figured it out. So if I can,
you can too. And I can't wait for the next 17 years. Here's a tip from Paige you can take
straight to the bank. If you're working through a trauma, maybe it's a financial trauma, maybe it's
a personal trauma, no matter what it is, be actively aware of what makes you feel powerful.
what it is, be actively aware of what makes you feel powerful. For Paige, starting a business made her feel empowered. And even sharing her anxieties about business with other founders
made her feel more confident because she realized that all founders struggle with anxiety. Maybe
that will work for you. Or maybe you're not ready to share your anxieties with the world.
Maybe take another page out of Paige's book and make yourself
a pump-up jams playlist instead. Money Rehab is a production of iHeartMedia. I'm your host,
Nicole Lappin. Our producers are Morgan Lavoie and Catherine Law. Money Rehab is edited and
engineered by Brandon Dickert with help from Josh Fisher.
Executive producers are Mangesh Hatikadur and Will Pearson.
Huge thanks to the OG Money Rehab supervising producer, Michelle Lanz, for her pre-production and development work.
And as always, thanks to you for finally investing in yourself so that you can get it together and get it all.