Moore Style - Talk Dirty To Me Q&A: The Meaning of Courtship, How to Flirt and Ways to Protect Yourself From Being Catfished

Episode Date: April 24, 2023

In this week’s episode, I tackle your questions regarding image, sex and dating! I answer three questions about modern day courtship, the in’s and out’s of a good flirt, and the importance of looking into your dates before you meet them in person!  Please tell us your thoughts about the Q&A over on Instagram @celestemooreimage, and be looking forward to more of these in the future! In this week’s episode we discuss:  [1:55] Question 1: (Lee) What does courtship mean today? [7:18] Question 2: (Unknown) What are the best ways to flirt?  [11:06] Question 3: (Brian) How do I know if someone is catfishing me? 

Hi, everyone. I'm your host, Celeste Moore, and you are listening to the Down and Dirty podcast, aka the Double D's of dating. This is a podcast for navigating the ins and outs of modern midlife dating. Here, we will discuss the challenges that men and women face in today's dating world. Like many industries, this one is forever changing, and I believe this platform will help those who need or want it. Today, it is the best time to take control of your desired outcome, whether it is a marriage, significant other, life partner, or just to gain the confidence in dating once again. Every other week, we will dive in and talk about different viewpoints that seem to be challenges in today's dating arena. So let's get into today's episode.

Welcome everybody today to another Down and Dirty podcast. This is your Q&A talk dirty to me episode. I absolutely love this episode so much because really at heart, I love to teach. I love to educate. It really fulfills me. And this is just another quick avenue that I can answer for those people that are not my clients, for those people just looking for some answers and help in the dating area. So as always, I'm your host, Celeste Moore, and let's get started on question number one. Today's question came from a really good friend of mine. His name is Lee. And I posted something the other day on my stories talking about courting. Now, I don't know if people know what this word means. I know it is quite ancient, but typically what hoarding meant was you were

dating someone in the intention of getting to know them in the intention of marriage back, back when, you know, there was not these non-traditional relationships. So now today when people court each other, well, there is a lack of that, but I think what we need to do is get back to that intentional dating, mindful dating, because really that's what that is in today's modern world. That's what we would call it. So basically we wanted to know what the meaning of courtship is. And coincidentally, he had just used that word with someone that he was interested in dating or slash seeing, he wanted me to explain to him that the way he believed he thought the meaning was to him was a little bit different from what I was

saying on my IG story. Hardship to me is that mindful dating. You have the intention of getting to know that person and really finding out if they are the one for you. So this does not allow the person pursuing her to just randomly select her based on chance or just on looks, right? This is not a fairy tale book or Hollywood romance movie where somehow magic just happens and boom, the stars align and there is your soulmate. No. Now, I also don't think everybody has the intention of the traditional meaning of dating, right?

we all have different ideals about what a person looks to us in our head and what we want in a relationship someone like for example me or lee or anybody else out there may not have a traditional mindset of the outcome that having a partner in your life what that might look like you know i want someone to experience life with that includes adventures and travel and someone to keep me on my toes, who is an intellect, someone to enjoy having like hot sex, et cetera. But I am not sure if I ever want to get married again, you know, that is okay. But I definitely want someone to use courtship in pursuing me, which is, which again is intentional, mindful dating, taking the time to get to know me, to pursue me, know my worth as a high-value woman who listens to my goals

and my passions and dreams, pays attention, and let's see where that leads to. For example, John, his version of a relationship is a bit more traditional. He wants the wife, the house with the picket fence, two and a half kids, and that nine job, lives in the suburbs and stays at home. And that's his idea of his relationship. All this is okay because honestly, the outcome should not matter. He's using courtship to find his Mrs. Right. The important piece here is having clear mindful intentions when dating. The more clear you are with who you want to meet based on your values, your beliefs and life goals, the better chances you will meet your person. You most likely will start attracting the right woman for you

when you put those out there into the universe. So you ask, how can I practice being mindful when you date? So do not waver once you know your deal breakers, your values, your life goals, and your beliefs. You may meet her when you least expect it. This is also part of the fun and excitement in life. So have fun and date with intention, AKA courting. There's that word again, and focus on the things that matter to you versus being that man who is unsure of someone. And it's just coasting through life, expecting that person just to come to you. Also, you don't want to attract the same person that you were with before when that didn't work. And that comes out of habit that comes out of like old childhood, rearing how your parents, you know, taught you

certain things, because that may not have been what you need, right? That's what you're used to. So stay laser focused on the most important qualities that you are looking for. And you will send the universe, God, whichever this energy. I love that what I say on some of my Instagram stories or prompts conversations. What does courtship mean today? I think questions are great because we all have different thoughts and opinions, right? And I think as we get back out there and date that we make sure to reevaluate our goals. I am solely here to guide you and help you make sure that you are being the best authentic version of yourself. You are confident, authentic, and ready to start courting. All right. Awesome. I really love that. Okay. Number two is from an

unknown. He is asking, what are some of the best ways to flirt? Now, this is a great question. I'm not going to give you pickup lines. What I am going to tell you is from a woman's point of view, where we are connecting and where we want to flirt. Okay. And how we want to flirt. So flirting should be an ebb and flow like a dance. There should be good vibes and energy between the two of you. If you can't tell this, then read her body language. Does she engage, for example? Be confident.

I don't know how many times I have to say be confident. So confidence is truly key. She's going to be turned on by your self-confidence. but don't be too overconfident. That can come across as very douchey or egotistic. Don't be afraid to approach her. I know you may feel awkward if you haven't done this in a while, but don't show it. Just go over there and if you are interested in sparking up a conversation, do it. Also, dress for success. Make sure you are wearing colors that make you approachable and warm and even trusting when a woman sees that you've taken care of yourself that allows you to

take care of others aka her she appreciates a man that dresses well grooms himself smells good and carries himself well so again that's using which is my next segue is body language using proper body language is huge make great eye contact and keep your hands out of your pockets focus your attention on her and this also means turning your body towards her, right? It is also great to mirror her with your body. This shows that you are paying attention and listening to her. Some of the best ways to flirt are smile and be engaging. Everyone has a great smile. It is an example of you wanting to be there and it says that you're a happy person. Ask her what some of her passions and or her interests are at the moment. Listen to her and ask questions about the subject. Ask meaningful

questions so that she knows you really are interested in getting to know her. She will know that you are being authentic. Breaking the ice with a little physical touch. Lean in and touch her shoulder or the small of her back if it is appropriate. Use humor. We love to laugh. Life can be stressful and laughing releases those feel-good hormones. This also tells us that you don't always take life so seriously and you like to have fun. Humor is great. If you ask any woman, one of the top things in all of these statistics, these tests, like what do you find most attractive in a man? humor is at least number one or number two. Obviously the goal is to let her know you're interested in her without her feeling the it, right? Nobody wants to feel that and be authentic,

be confident. And if she doesn't respond by continuing the conversation and says like, no, thank you. Do not be offended because you will know that she is not the right woman for you on to the next. Thank God. There are a lot of eligible, amazing women on the market. The right one will show herself when you get crystal clear with what it is you were looking for. I hope that helped. All right. Last question. This is from Brian. He wanted to know, how do I know if it's a catfish online or not? That's a really good question. so in today's world we really do not know if we're being catfished online it could be a bot it could be a wife of a husband it could be even something more sinister you must take every

precaution when online dating there are more romance scams happening than you can imagine at this very fast rate it's one of the biggest multi-million dollar scams on the internet is romance scams. There's all different ways that this is happening. So just watch out for those. Make sure and you ask for a video call before you guys actually meet. If she refuses, then you must decline. I would invest in an app that allows very little information to do like a background check on a person. All you need is either an email name or even an address. This will pull up information on them and determine if they are married, if they're a bot, do they have a record in any state? Are they who they say they are? I highly, highly recommend an app called BrightSwipe. Look for

in the next couple of weeks, Scott Bright has created this app. And I think this is by far the best app to use. It's an app that allows like three different types of data checks. and it's super reasonable. I think it's like under $8. And it basically allows you to do all those tests to see if they have records in any state, if they're married, if they say who they are and so on and so forth. I will have you wait to listen to the recording coming up in, I believe it's two weeks. So pay attention to that because it's super, super important. So Bright Swipe was created so that people that online date can protect themselves as best as possible. Trust me, you will want to make sure you're safe. Meet in a very public place and never drink something you

have left at the table while stepping out to make a call or run to the bathroom. Just to be safe, order another drink when you get back. I know that there's quite a bit of crazies in the world and they slip date rape drugs and all sorts of things. And then obviously that's a more sinister thing, but it happens. So protect yourself. But for the first day, I actually would shy away from having a cocktail to see if this person kind of seems on the up and up because, you know, safety is priority. Never sent any money for any reason to someone you do not know. Have a backup plan to leave early. If things get weird, have someone know where you are, you know, it's better just to be safe. So stay safe out there. So keep these Q and A's coming. I really,

really love answering them. And another amazing, awesome thing that's happening with me and Celeste Moore is this week I am launching a new package and I am just so thrilled to be able to work with men who need this in their lives and this fits for them. I have been listening to what you've been wanting. And I think I've created something that you're going to love anyways. It's a real sweet spot. So let's connect soon because I am only accepting three clients these first three months. It is a three-month program and I have very limited space. So I look forward to helping you achieve all of your dating and image goals. And thanks again for tuning in. Have a wonderful day. thanks for tuning in to today's episode come and hang out with me on instagram at celeste more

image let me know your thoughts on today's episode because i always love hearing from you all you can find all the links and resources in the show notes of the episode on my website celestemore.com okay that's all for now i'll see you in the next episode see you next time friends you