More Money Podcast - 020 My Experience Being a MIssionary & Sponsoring a Child - Jessica Moorhouse

Episode Date: September 30, 2015

In this episode, I talk about my experience as a missionary in Africa at 18 and sponsoring a child in my 20s to give back. Long episode description: Hello and welcome to another solo podcast episode with yours truly. I know in episode 1 I said I would just being doing interviewed shows, but what can I say, I love to talk and I’ve got a lot to say. In this episode which I am super excited to share with you, I dive into my experience as a missionary and sponsoring a child to give back. I believe giving back and donating to charities is incredibly important, especially when it comes to personal finance. When we think about money management though, it’s usually the last thing we think of after saving, investing and making more money. Giving back has always been a big part of my life, starting with my childhood in the Catholic church. Participating in giving back through my church’s programs evolved into me deciding to go to Africa at 18 to do some good overseas. It was definitely an enlightening experience, good and bad, so make sure to listen to find out what I think about it a decade later. I also had a sponsor child for a period in my early 20s. I actually decided to get a sponsor child when I first moved out of my parents and was making my lowest salary to date. But even though I was at my poorest, I knew that as a financially independent woman I needed to still set aside some money to help others. Now in my late 20s, I have a very different outlook on giving back because of these two experiences. I’m still all for helping others, especially financially, but I just choose to go about it a different way than I did when I was younger. Since this is a pretty personal episode, and I share things on there that I’ve never talked about before, I would love to get your feedback. Let me know what you think, or better yet share a story you have about giving back in the show notes. Blog Posts I Mentioned My Trip to The Gambia: An Experience That Changed My Life My Experience Sponsoring a Child I’m Gonna Be a Mentor! Doing Your Research Before Giving Your Money to a Charity Charitable Programs I Mentioned Compassion Canada YWCA High School Mentorship Program – Vancouver Shownotes: jessicamoorhouse.com/20 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello and welcome back. Another Wednesday, another podcast. And this time you may have already noticed with the change of my podcast artwork and the name on iTunes and Stitcher and SoundCloud, but I have kind of shortened the name of this podcast. It was originally Mo Money Mo Houses, which went with the name of my blog. But now this podcast will now be known as the Mo Money Podcast. That's kind of what people were calling it anyway. And it's kind of fun. It's shorter to remember. And so bam, it's the Mo Money Podcast now. I'm of course your host, Jessica Morehouse. Thank you so much for joining me today. I don't know if I've mentioned this on the podcast, maybe just on my blog and on

social media, but I've kind of decided every 10th podcast episode, I'm going to do kind of a solo episode with, well, just me, obviously, because it's solo. And I'm going to be talking about a certain topic that has really affected me in my life and has something to do with personal finance. So you'll remember, episode one was me talking about my personal finance journey. And episode 10 was me talking about my experience moving from my hometown of Coquitlam and quitting my job and kind of risking it all to start a new life with my new husband at the time in Toronto. So this is episode 20, and I'm going to be talking about my experience with giving back and charity. I feel like it's

kind of an important topic when talking about money, but it may not always be the first thing you think about when you think about personal finance. But it's definitely affected me in my life, just some of the things I've done in terms of charity and giving back and things like that. So I'm very excited to kind of share some of my stories with you in this episode. So I'm going to kind of start from my childhood because that's where it really began for me. I've mentioned a couple of times on my blog, but not in the podcast yet, that I do come from a religious background. I was raised Catholic on my mom's side. My dad is not religious, but my mom and that side of the family is. And so I always had a very interesting perspective in that front. My mom's side of the family is. And so I always had a very interesting perspective on,

in, in that front. Um, you know, my mom's side of the family is, um, very in tune with the Catholic church and we used to, you know, going, growing up, um, I, you know, had to go to church every Sunday. I did my, you know, um, first confession and first communion and confirmation and all of those steps. And going through that experience growing up, it was always, you know, very present in my life, the importance of charity, you know, going to church every Sunday. You know, my mom, I don't know what the proper name for it is called, but we'd get these envelopes that would last you for the year and you'd, you know, put a check or some cash in there um, we'd get these envelopes, um, that would last you for the year and you, you know, put a check or some cash in there and then we'd have like the offering. So every, you know,

kind of near the end of the, the mass, um, we would, you know, baskets would be, um, kind of handed around and then you put your envelope of money in there and that would go to, um, the church and then the church would use that money to, you know, I guess, I mean, I'm not going to exactly say where it went because I don't know the answer to that. But from what I understand, it went to the church and then the church, you know, would, you know, obviously pay the salary for the priest and then all these other kind of charitable programs that it was involved in. And also another kind of thing that just popped in my head was for, you know, my mom did that. I obviously didn't have any money growing up, so I didn't really contribute financially for

that, but I always knew it was important to, you know, carry that on as I, you know, became an adult. But the one thing I do remember doing as like a kid and then a teenager was around Christmas, we'd always have these big Christmas trees at the church. And so there's always just these, um, kind of paper ornaments and you'd pick one and it'd have someone's name on it. And basically it would be a person's name and on the back it would have what they were asking for Christmas. And usually it was, you know, a kid and sometimes they don't have their age on it. And it would say something like, I would like some new socks or I would like a doll or whatever. And so when I was a teenager, when started working, I made that kind of a tradition for me. And so I would pick an ornament and then

I would go to the store and buy whatever it was and then put it in the basket for the next Sunday. And that was something that was really important to me. I mean, I really didn't have that much money, honestly, when I was like 15, 16, working at whatever, a customer service job. But I knew it was really important for me to save up a little bit of money so I could afford that gift for that person. Because it's just important to give back to those who are less fortunate. And I knew I was fortunate. I didn't come from a wealthy family, but I knew I came from a, you know, a fortunate family. Now I'm going to kind of fast forward a few years. So although I grew up Catholic, I was never

super gung-ho, maybe gung-ho is like the completely wrong term, but I was never super passionate and open about it. And part of the reason was honestly, when I would tell some people, you know, some of my friends and some people I went to school with, they would make fun of me. It's awful. And it definitely affected me later on in life. But yeah, I was kind of embarrassed about going to church and all the kind of traditions and ceremonies that came with being Catholic. So I never really talked about it as I grew older because I was embarrassed and I didn't want to get, you know, I didn't want the attention. I didn't want to be made fun of anymore.

But when I graduated high school, went to university, I kind of started making some new friends. And at the time, my older sister had quite a few friends that were part of this, it was called a college and career group. It was a Christian kind of Bible study and they weren't Catholic, they were Protestant. And so that was kind of a bit different for me because at that point, I had only been to a Catholic church, so I didn't really know what a Protestant church meant or looked like. But anyway, so she, you know, I was starting to make new friends and it was difficult my first year at university. You're not with your normal high school friends anymore. You're in these big classes and it's a bit terrifying. And so she was going to the

same university as me. And so she invited me to this college and career group that she was going to. And I'm like, yeah, sure. I mean, I'll give it a go. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? And so I started going and yeah, everyone super super nice i mean obviously they're like christian and you know keen and nice and everything's uh dandy and uh yeah they're great people and at one point i guess maybe i'd been in that group for about i don't know six months and uh there was someone who came to speak at our uh meeting and they started talking about how there was this um trip uh that they're trying to get people to go on it was a mission trip to uh gambia in africa and uh they're trying to um get some

people interested and going on this trip and you know again i wasn't super like churchy, if you will. But it sounded like something totally crazy and random and something that I would never do. And at that point, I mean, I guess I was 18 at that time. I felt a bit, I don't know, I was never the person to do anything crazy or just, you know, out of the blue. I was very, you know, I mean, I like my routines. I like to play it safe and, and all that stuff. But at the same time, I also knew that I didn't want to live a life of regret. I didn't want to live a life that was too sheltered or boring, quite honestly. I knew like there was an adventurous side of me, but I was just kind of terrified to kind of let it go free, if you will. And so when this person came to talk to us, in my mind, I'm like, you know what would be super crazy is if I went to Africa. Like that is

the last thing I would ever do. Come on. And of course, with that kind of stuck in my mind, I'm like, maybe I should, maybe I should actually go like, why not? And so I looked kind of more into it. And there was one other guy from that group who was for sure going. And so I kind of told him like, I'm thinking about going, but I don't know, that just seems a bit crazy to me. And there's a lot of preparation involved and fundraising, all this kind of stuff. And he really encouraged me. He's like, if you want to go, you should, you know, do it. Like what's holding you back? And so I'm like, okay, fine. You know, and at that point I was lucky enough to have gotten a full scholarship for my first

year of university, but I'm still working. So I actually had saved up quite a bit of money. I mean, relatively speaking, obviously. So I actually could afford the trip. I mean, I still had obviously. Um, so I actually could afford, um, the trip. I mean, I still had a fundraise cause I couldn't, I didn't want to spend all of my savings, but, um, yeah, I'm like, well, there's really no reason I shouldn't go to, you know, go on this experience. It's just, you know, try something totally new. And it was, you know, what's supposed to be for a good cause. We're going to go to this place and, you know,

supposedly help people. And I, I, I always want want to like help obviously like there's this part of me that's like kind of the helper i always want to try to like fix things and help people even if it's to the detriment of me which is a whole other story but uh so yeah so i ended up signing up and uh me and him like we did this whole fundraising um party i just remember there was a lot of pies at an order, a lot of highs and we served pie and we, you know, fundraised, uh, you know, several thousands dollars so we could both afford to go on the trip. And, uh, yeah. And so I still remember this, like it was yesterday. It was, I think the night before the trip and I had packed every, everything I like, you know, did my research. I was completely

prepared as much as I could be anyway. And in my mind, I'm like, oh my God, what did I do? Why, why, why, why am I going to Africa? It's not necessarily the safest place. I don't really know much about it. I don't know anyone who's been there. And I started just really freaking out and really wanted like Colin sick for the whole trip. You know for the whole trip you know like oh sorry I can't make it don't feel well but I knew I'm like no that's not the way to live you need to just conquer those fears because you never know what'll happen if you actually just do it and so got over that somehow made it to the airport got on the plane and uh I I went there and it was it was me and this other guy from vancouver that i went with and then there was the majority of people were from uh saskatchewan and uh yeah

and there was i don't know how many people there were maybe 10 to 15 it was a pretty small group and yeah we went to gambia and if anyone's interested in where Gambia is, and of course you probably haven't heard of it, it is the smallest country in Africa. It is near Senegal. And it is a, the majority of people that live there are, they, I mean, they speak English, but I think they have other national languages. Whereas in Senegal, like the majority of people speak french um but uh it's also like i think at the time it was like 90 of the population were practicing muslims however it's a country that was open to any religion there was no you know you weren't going to get in trouble if you're practicing another religion and so so that's a bit of a, okay, that's weird, but okay, I'm going, I'm just going to go with it.

And so we get there and it took me about a week to acclimatize. It was just so hot. I was just exhausted the whole first week and also homesick and freaking out. And lots of the people were just so different than me. I mean, all like my thinking was like, I'm going to go on this trip and we're going to a crazy country. I've never, would never think of ever going and would probably never go again. And like, I wanted to help people. That's why I went there. That's why I spent a bunch of my money and fundraised a bunch of other people's money and, you know, took their donations. It was so I can go to this country and help and do some good in the world. That was my thinking. A little naive, you know, looking back, but we'll get to that later. Anyway, so we get there and I, you know,

start talking to the rest of the group, trying to make friends and everything. And I realized they are very, very different than me. You know, as a Catholic, we are, it's just very different than Protestantism. In my experience, Catholics are very traditional, but quiet. Like if you go to a mass, it's like, there's no talking at all. Whereas in a Protestant church, there's, you know, there's a lot of singing and talking and, you know, movement,

and you can express yourself openly, whereas in Catholics, a little bit more, you know, subdued. So talking too. And also it's like, yeah, I went to like, um, catechism and all that stuff, but you still, we didn't really, I don't know, again, my experience, we don't really talk about faith that much or like use lots of the words that I think some of the Protestant people on the trip talked about, like, you know, finding Jesus and your faith and, and buzzwords like that. I'm like, I don't know where that's coming from. I've never heard that. And I've been going to church all these years and I've never heard of any of these isms, you know? And so I, there's definitely like some acclimatizing to this whole different thinking of, you know, talking about religion and think about religion. And, you know,

they're very much into like reading the Bible and, you know, quoting verse, you know, passages. And I'm like, I can't tell you anything off the top of my head. I did, you know, learn about the teachings and the stuff, but I can't, we didn't like memorize passages. That wasn't like part of our chasm class. So I couldn't tell you, I can tell you, you know, I can recite Hail Mary, but I can't tell you what happened in John 14, 11 or something. Um, anyway, so that was a bit of a, okay, this is freaky. This is, I definitely miss home, but, um, eventually I did get to know everyone really well and, you know, open myself up to them and just kind of, uh, yeah, just, I don't know, became friends. And I, I, after that, and I was only, it was only a two month trip and I, you know, remained friends with quite a few of them for

many years afterwards. And I'll tell you, I don't know if I mentioned this prior, but yeah, I was 18. So this trip was in the year 2005. So, and it's 2015 now. So that's 10 years ago. That's kind of crazy. this happened a decade ago but I still remember it as if it happened yesterday get groceries delivered across the GTA from real Canadian superstore with PC Express shop online for super prices and super savings try it today and get up to $75 in PC optimum points Visit superstore.ca to get started. Anyway, so, you know, I kind of went into this trip thinking it was going to be this wonderful opportunity for me to help, but looking back, it wasn't exactly what I thought it would be. And this is why I have this perspective now that I don't personally agree with mission trips. I don't.

I don't think they are as helpful as a lot of other programs out there. And again, I also kind of thought, I don't know why I would think differently, but at the time I thought we were going there to, you know, I don't know, put some wells in or help at some orphanages and, you know, kind of like hands-on things. But a lot of it was evangelism, which, again, as a Catholic, that's not really part of my vocabulary. We, you know, my experience is just, you know, we go to church, you know, we do all kinds of ceremonial things, but we don't go out preaching. Like preaching is not a thing we do. We kind of keep that to ourselves. And, but whereas like lots of the Protestants I was with, like, that's kind of the whole, and honestly, that was the whole point of the mission was to go and preach and evangelize and to hopefully convert

people, which again, looking back, I'm like, I don't agree with that. And I kind of went in with my eyes, you know, I didn't really know what I was getting myself into, but yeah, it is what it is living their own. Right. Um, so I was there for two months and, uh, you know, I did do a few hands-on things. I did, um did kind of volunteer at this one orphanage and so helped feed these, you know, kids at lunch every day for maybe a couple of weeks. And it was actually pretty heartbreaking because there was a lot of kids there and none of them had parents and they had to live in this orphanage. So that was, that was really tough as an 18 year old to, you know, understand and comprehend. But I, so I and comprehend. So I could say, what did I do?

What did I accomplish on this trip? Well, hopefully I did some good by volunteering for a couple of weeks there. But looking back, I don't know if I actually did any good. I spent thousands of dollars to get to Africa. And then I came back and I'm like, you know, I did, I definitely had a different perspective for a little bit when I came back home to Canada, you know, realizing that, you know, materials aren't that important. What's important is the people that you love, that, you know, the family that you have in your life. And so that, and I've always kept that kind

of perspective, you know, for these past 10 years since my trip. But otherwise, I, you know, looking back, what did I do with those thousands of dollars on that trip? I can't say that I really did much. And that's, you know, hard and upsetting, but it is what it is. So if any of you are thinking on going on a mission trip, hey, you know, that is your journey. That's your personal experience. Do what you want. But I couldn't necessarily say that it's a good use of money, resources. If you want to help people, I do, you know, there's a lot of different avenues you can go into. So, and this kind of brings me to my next experience with charity. So what I currently do in my life is I make sure to set aside a portion of my money. You know, some people call that tithing, but, you know, it's just I'm putting away some money percentage every year. And then I choose a charity that kind

of means something to me or, um, you know, I just, you know, it really speaks to me or it seems like a good cause and a good organization. And then I donate that money to that organization. And I actually did write a blog post, uh, about this, which I'll include in the show notes. And it was, uh, that there is a, you know, in Canada, I'll try to look at, uh, into this for, uh, the States, but there is a website you know, in Canada, I'm, I, I'll try to look into this for the States, but there is a website on the government website where you can find out, you know, if you're interested in donating for some money to a specific charity, you can find out if that charity is actually a good charity,

if it's credible and also where their money goes. If you donate money, where, where are all their donations go? Is it mainly administrative costs or does it go to certain programs? Does it go to education? And so I think I'll include that in the show notes because I think it's actually really important that you know those details before you ever give an organization money. All right. So that's what I've been doing for the past several years. I do my research and then I choose a charity and then I donate some money to that charity. But when I first finished university and moved out on my own, I was really interested in getting a sponsor child. The reason that I wanted to get a sponsor child was, you know, kind of twofold. So I felt like at that time, like I just seen so many commercials and it just kind of built up and you know all those you know you see a child and

kind of a war-torn country and you know for only five dollars a day or whatever you can help this child or maybe it's a dollar a day or whatever and then also at that time my older sister um started uh she got a sponsored child and i think my mom also had one and so you know they enjoyed the experience it isn't that much money. So I thought, you know what, I'll look into what organization would work for me and do it. And I was definitely kind of like wary of some of them, like World Vision. I just, you know, just kind of my personal, I think that I feel like there's just too much money put into marketing and advertising. And that personally bugs me. I feel like,

you know, it's really expensive to make those commercials and have them on cable networks. I just, it just didn't really sit right with me. So the organization I chose was called Compassion Canada. And it was one that my older sister, you know, was, got her sponsored child through. And she, you know, kind of did a bunch of research and told me about it. And so I, you know, was got her sponsored child through and she, you know, kind of did a bunch of research and told me about it. And so I, you know, trusted her opinion, but I also liked that there was the opportunity if, you know, the child grows up and you're, you've been having this kind of pen pal relationship for all these years, you were able to connect with them and, you know, visit them once they're done the program, which I kind of just liked. It could have been like a little

fantasy thing, but I kind of, I liked the idea of being able to visit them and kind of see, oh, oh, great. I'm glad that you did get, you know, my money and that you did get an education and you're doing okay which also kind of sits weirdly with me because it almost feels like I know I'm weird with charity sometimes I'm like you should that whole idea of you shouldn't feel good or you shouldn't feel like you should be getting anything out of charity charity isn't about you it is about helping out someone else and you shouldn't you know expect anything in anything in return. But again, you know, with the sponsored child, sometimes it is a bit of a, you know, you, you want to feel good that you're doing it. You want to, you know, get their photos and make sure that they're

doing well. I don't know if that's selfish or not selfish. I, I've not, I'm a bit confused on that front, but that's just me anyways. So I visited the Compassion Canada website and how you choose a sponsored child on this website. And it may be similar for other organizations is there's kind of a list of childs that you can choose and you can see a little description about them, where they live and what they need and all that stuff and some background. And then you choose the one you want, which is also kind of a weird thing because it kind of feels like online shopping, which is like, that's kind of weird, but I don't know how else they would have, you know, they can set it up quite honestly. You have to choose somebody, but maybe it would be better

if they just chose someone for you. But anyways, so I, you know, kind of just looked through some description and I chose a young girl and I was a sponsor for her for about a year and uh you know it was fine i did write her a few letters and she wrote me back and that was interesting but also kind of strange because i didn't really know how to respond to her because we were living such different lives since she was young and so i was more just like asking her questions like what's your favorite color how are how are you stuff like that and the reason it ended was I got a letter from Compassion Canada saying that she no longer needed a sponsor. And I called them to make sure everything was okay because, God forbid, anything actually terrible happened to her. I couldn't imagine sponsoring a child and the worst happens and they pass away or something like that.

And so I made sure to call to make sure what the specific reasoning was and they um couldn't tell me specifically but they said most likely it was because um one of her parents got a well-paying job and they didn't need the financial assistance anymore so I'm hoping that is the reason um but after that I kind of I considered getting another one but I don't know I just I just thought as much as you know I hope I did help this person I I think I I just felt a little bit strange feeling that connected I of course I want to help people I want to use my money so it's not just helping me it's helping someone else but I almost felt a little bit too personally connected, if that makes sense. And again, that's just maybe a weird quirk of mine. So after I did that, I kind of like, I don't know if I'll do that again. And yeah, and so I, after that, I kind of said, okay, the way I'm going to be giving back is a couple different

ways. I'm always going to, you know, give kind of a lump sum that I save up throughout the year to a particular organization that I feel passionate about or I really like. And then I'll also give back in my time. So one of the things I've done in the, I mean, it was a couple of years ago now, but there, you know, there's the YMCA, but there's also the YWCA and there's a really great program in Vancouver through the YWCA. And I'll also the YWCA and there's a really great program in Vancouver through the YWCA. And I'll include a, some more information in the show notes. Cause I think, you know, women, you know, working women, if you, you don't want to give back, you want to volunteer, but you don't really know what to do. This is an awesome program that I actually found out

through my mom. And it's basically you're a mentor to a high school student. And it's not exactly like a kind of big brother, big sister thing where they come from a certain background and they need guidance because they don't really have an adult figure. But it's more for kids who are in high school that want to go to post-secondary, but they may not actually have like an older sibling or someone that's been through that and so they they need some guidance in that respect uh and it's only a nine month commitment you only have to meet them um once a month and do activities with them and so you know you you talk a lot about like what

what should they expect when they you know uh go to post-secondary what should they expect when they you know graduate and get a real job and have to move out and everything but it's also just for you to be a good role model for them and so you know I I really got a lot out of it because you know I was lucky enough to have an older sister who was um three years older than me and so I was able to kind of look into the future three years and be like, okay, okay. I know what to expect when I graduate high school. I know what to expect after graduating university and then getting my first job

because she always did it first. And so I kind of had that guidance. And then I did the same thing for my younger sister. Obviously it is difficult to find the time to volunteer. I do sometimes feel like giving your time and your, your effort and just being hands-on can be a bit more valuable than just, you know, writing a check, but it is obviously sometimes, you know, impossible to find that extra time. But that being said, I think no matter what you do, what kind of way, you know, you choose to give back, it is important to kind of budget that. I think it's important to, yeah, budget giving back in your finances.

It's, you know, obviously very important to save for yourself. But, you know, let's be honest, we're not all in this world alone. We're living with millions of other people and lots of those people, you know, didn't have the same opportunities as most of us, especially the, you know, most of you listening who are, you know, fortunate enough to have some kind of device or computer that allows you to listen to podcasts. Most people, like lots of people just don't even have access to the internet. So I think we need to always kind of be mindful of that and, you know, try our best to give what we can because I think every, every little bit matters, even if you don't think it does.

I know it does. It really does. So on that note, I'm going to wrap up. Thank you so much for listening to, to my experience. It's kind of a story that I've wanted to express for a while. I have written some blog posts about it, but sometimes I do feel like, Oh, I just want to like, you know, just tell you in my voice, you know, like you're sitting right next to me. It's just, it's just one of those things. And so I'm hoping that you like this episode because I'm definitely going to do another episode like this in another 10 episodes kind of near December. And that episode is going to be

about my experience in post-secondary because I am a,ial money blogger and podcaster. And so I kind of want to dig into my experience as a millennial going to post-secondary because there's a lot of people going through the whole thing, getting student loan debt, getting a degree, and then realizing, hey, what the heck? I was promised a certain lifestyle and it's just not happening. And so I kind of want to give my two cents about that and my experience with graduating right around the time the recession was in full swing. So again, thank you so much for listening.

For the show notes for this episode, make sure to visit momoneymohouses.com slash 20. And for every episode that I've done up until now, visit momoneymohouses.com slash podcast. And for every episode that I've done up until now, visit momoneymohouses.com slash podcast, and feel free to get in touch with me. Tell me what you're thinking. Do you like this podcast? Do you like this episode? Do you have a really interesting story about this topic or other topics I've covered so far? I'd love to know. Please, you can email me, jessica at momoneymohouses.com, or you can tweet me. And yes, I did just actually recently change my Twitter handle. It is at jessi underscore morehouse. So

that's J-E-S-S-I underscore M-O-O-R-H-O-U-S-E. Or just search me, Jessica Morehouse. I'm the one kind of with the most Twitter followers out of all the other Jessica Morehouses. So thank you so much for listening again, And I will see you back here next Wednesday. This podcast is distributed by the Women in Media Podcast Network. Find out more at womeninmedia.network.