More Money Podcast - 362 Getting to the Heart of Your Money - Allison Baggerly, Founder of Inspired Budget and Author of Money Made Easy

Episode Date: April 5, 2023

Something I firmly believe is that personal finance is for everyone. I think that anyone can start their personal finance journey at any point in their life (it's never too late!) and getting to grips with your money doesn’t have to be difficult. My guest today believes the same and that’s why she recently wrote a book about it. You might recognize today’s guest from Episode 291 of the podcast but now almost two years later, Allison Baggerly is back on the show to talk all about her new book, Money Made Easy! Allison Baggerly is an author, podcaster, money coach, and founder of Inspired Budget. As a former teacher, Allison blends her talents for teaching with her passion for personal finances to help others learn how to start budgeting and build a life they love. In this episode, Allison shares what inspired her new book and why she’s passionate about getting rid of the shame attached to getting better with your money. She also shares her top tips for getting your partner on board with your personal finance journey and why getting to the heart of what you want out of life is the key to a budget that will work best for you. For full episode show notes visit: https://jessicamoorhouse.com/362 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello, and welcome back to the More Money Podcast. This is your host, Jessica Morehouse, and this is episode 362 of the podcast. And as I teased last week, I have a repeat guest on the show, and I'm so excited to have her back on the show because she has a book, and I'm so, so thrilled for her. So I have Alison Bakerley back on the show. You are probably more familiar with her and her Instagram account and her website. She goes under the moniker Inspired Budget. And she was on the show back in July of 2021. So here we are almost two years later. That's episode 291, if you want to listen to that after that, where we talk about why budgeting is a form of self-care, which is definitely a theme that she kind of weaves through her new book called Money Made Easy. So for those of you who are new to Allison, here's just a little info about her. So obviously, she is an author now, but she also has her own podcast called the Inspired Budget Podcast. And she's a money coach. And of course, founded her whole platform blog, Instagram podcast,

everything in between under the moniker Inspired Budget. But what's really interesting about her and probably what makes a lot of people really love the content that she creates is she's a former teacher. And so she blends a lot of her talents from her teaching profession and then blends it in with her passion for personal finance to really explain things and educate people in a very interesting and easy to understand way. And one really cool thing about her, and we do kind of touch on this in the episode, and she talks about this in her book as well, is her and her husband overcame some severe debt.

They had over $100,000 of debt. They had two teacher salaries. So it was very difficult to get through that. And they did. And she wants to inspire others to not give up, to pay off their debt, and to live a more financially free life. So I'm super thrilled to have her on the show. So we've got plenty to talk about. So let's just get to the good stuff. Here's my interview with Allison. Welcome back, Allison, to the More Money Podcast. I'm so excited to have you back on the show almost two years later. I mean, I loved the episode that we did back then. And if anyone's interested, it was episode 291, June 2021, where we really talked about your journey and just how you were able to pay off over $100,000 in debt on kind of an average salary and how that kind of inspired your new career, which is a financial educator, really.

And it's so exciting to see now that you have a book out in the world called Money Made Easy. So congratulations. Thank you. This is nothing I ever thought would happen, having a book out in the world. But here I sit with a book that I wrote. I can't believe it. But I'm very excited for people to read it and be inspired and really find a solution to making money just a simpler and honestly a more enjoyable experience in their life. Yeah. So tell me about how the book came about. What kind of inspired, you know, I know like your podcaster too, it's like there's a million personal finance books out in the world now. Why did you want to write your book, Money Made Easy? What was kind of the inspiration behind kind of the messaging behind it? Oh my gosh. Well, a publisher actually reached out to me directly and they were like, we want you to write a book. And I was like, oh, you're funny. Yeah, that's a funny joke, guys. And after doing some thinking about it and talking about it with my family and talking about it with some of my really close friends in the personal finance space, I by men and white men. And there's not as many written by women. And as someone who, you know, I am half Hispanic, just having someone who is a Latina write

a book, just you don't see that often. That's not in the stores. And so I decided to write the book just because, number one, I want there to be more books for women that are written really geared to women about money. And then number two, I think that personal finance is just that it's very personal. And it could be one thing for me to read a book and tell me step by step everything I need to do from A to Z, do it exactly like this and it'll work. And it doesn't work because whoever wrote that book is not me and they don't have this unique set of

circumstances that I am going through. So my book is really here are all your options in terms of budgeting, how to make it work, no matter how you're paid, or here are different options for how to pay off debt or how to save money. Now you do you. It's less of a here's exactly what you need to do and more of a choose your own adventure type book. Figure out what works for you and then implement that. Yeah, which makes a lot more sense. I mean, I think we've all read those books. And sadly, kind of, when I hear people have just discovered personal finance or just, you know, oh, I want to learn.

They're still really going back to probably because they're like looking on Amazon. They're like, what's the most popular personal finance book? And they're still going back to those books of that are, you know, not, you know, they've been around for a while. And they're written by men. And they are so strict. And, you know, there's no room for for any kind of flexibility. And that's part of the reason why I think I used to really, I mean, have trouble reading those books, because I yeah, you'd put the blame on yourself if you tried to implement what you learned and you're like I'm not getting any results or this just doesn't make sense in my brain is there something wrong with me because I'm not doing these little steps and I'm not getting

anywhere and yeah I think as you know and I've noticed we've been doing this for a while the only way to actually achieve whatever your goals are um and to to you know change these habits you've had for a long time is to try a bunch of different things and and also recognize that you are coming from a different place it's these white men with super privilege who've never probably had the same struggles you know like the pay gap and stuff not getting a raise when you ask for it, you know. Exactly. Having all of the childhood duties and household duties put on you. So therefore, you feel guilty if you have to work more. I mean, I just think that I completely agree. I know years ago, back in 2011, when we found ourselves pregnant, and I knew nothing about money,

I walked into a half price bookstore. and I went straight to the money section and it was like Dave Ramsey. And I bought that book. And I remember feeling like, okay, icky, but also motivated when I was done reading it. It's very interesting how I could feel motivated, but also like mad at myself, angry with my past, dumb. I felt stupid. I felt icky. But that type of feeling can be motivating for some people, but it's not for me. And for anyone

who also walks away from a book that is just more shame driven and what are you doing? Why are you doing that? Here's what to do instead. If you walk away from that book feeling gross about yourself, then read my book. Because it truly offers you grace and empathy. And I share our stories along in the book. It's really our stories are written within the chapter of how our family has truly gone from honestly just struggling so much with money to having a really positive relationship with money and the process of that

and how it is attainable for anyone. Yeah. And I think that's one of the keys to is how to develop that positive relationship with money. Because, yeah, I mean, similar to you, when I was starting to learn about personal finance and blog, you know, back in 2010, 2011, all of the information was very much that shame, fear based kind of messaging, because I guess at the time, it was really about negative reinforcement. And, you know, yeah, it's all about like, oh, you're not doing what you're supposed to do. So we're got to whip you into shape, all that kind of stuff. And I've got to realize, yeah, it was motivating, you know, in some points, I'm like, okay, well, I'm going to change what I'm going to do. And that's great. So we got some good things out of it. But then years later, I realized I had this really twisted relationship with money where it Yeah, it did make me feel bad.

If I didn't do something perfectly, or if I, you know, yeah, just just went against some of the teachings, even if it wasn't going to actually have a negative impact on me. Just like, you know, it's okay if you buy a freaking coffee every day. Like, we need to get rid of that idea that, you know, those little things will ruin your retirement. It's like, no, that's literally not what it's about at all. So one thing, yeah, I'd remind people is if you are reading some of those books, you know, the books that they're out there. First, I'd say, you know, word of caution, always do some research on who is that author? And is there, you know, is there some weird stuff going on in their background? I'm telling you,

most of those people, not that they're like canceled, but maybe some of them should be, you know, just know who's writing it and what their personal values are. And that might be something to look into, because that will will you'll get lots more information about why are they writing with this tone and why are they writing certain things but then also recognize yeah if you walk away and you feel really bad um you're gonna have to work on that later on life you're gonna have to unpack that maybe with therapists that's what i've been doing to to be like why do do I have this really not healthy relationship with money? Because you are able, especially with books like yours and all the

content you've been creating for years, there is a way that you can have that healthy, positive relationship with money and achieve your goals. It doesn't have to be like, well, you know, you just got to you just got to deal with it. It's like, no, not in this day and age. No. Yes. And it's very interesting because when I was writing the book, I actually had a content editor. So, you know, you have your regular editor who just kind of guides you. But then I had a content editor who I was working with very closely on every chapter of my book. And she knew that I wanted my book to be very uplifting. But when you're talking about money struggles, like, there is some, you know, this, this reflection that can be just a downer, honestly. And so I tried really hard and I worked with her to make sure that when I was sharing stories that were

difficult, or when we were talking about difficult topics, that we didn't sit in that shame and frustration for long in the writing process. It's like, you already know how you feel. You already feel this way. Let's get in, get out. Let's acknowledge our feelings, sit with them for a very short period of time, and then develop a plan to move forward.

So just even in writing the book, I really tried to do that. I'm just naturally a very empathetic and understanding person. And so I wanted that to be conveyed in the book as well. So I definitely think that's what sets it apart from others. And just also the stories that are weaved throughout the book kind of keeps it just more entertaining. Yeah, exactly. I feel like people are tired of it.

I mean, I certainly am tired of reading books that are just like, do this, do this, do this. It's like, no, I actually want to know. I mean, that's why I have the podcast. It's like, I don't want just some tips and some advice. I want to know about you. And so we can have that actual human connection, because that's what's gonna, I think, create that long lasting motivation is knowing that there's other people in the world that have gone through something similar to you and they were able to find a path to improve their situation. And so that should make you feel like you're less alone. I want to kind of talk a little bit about some of the chapters you have in your book. It really does seem like it goes through pretty much everything that people are going through and how to set up that really solid foundation for generating wealth and just managing your money in an actionable way. Obviously, you've got a few chapters about budgeting specifically, and I know you're the inspired budget. What did you really want to get across in those chapters about budgeting? Because I know that's a big topic. People have feelings about it. Some people are like, this is the only way to budget. What were some of the things that you wanted to make

sure that came across in that chapters? Oh, my goodness. So originally, Jessica, my budgeting chapter was one chapter. And as I was writing it, I was like, this can't be one chapter. We've got to break it up. So I have really two chapters. One of them is about creating your budget. And one of them is about the secret behind successful budgeting. So before we even talk about the budget, we do have a chapter on mindset. The creating your budget is very much the nuts and bolts. I am a visual learner. And as I was a teacher for 10 years, and I know really how to explain things in a way

that makes sense, where people don't feel like, you know, they have those aha moments instead of that, I still don't feel like, you know, they have those aha moments instead of that I still don't get it moment. And that's really what chapter number three, creating your budget is all about. It's really the nuts and bolts behind it. Whether you're paid, you know, once a month, every other week, variable, I go through it all. I give you pages.

You can actually go online and get the free worksheets. If you buy the book, you get the worksheets along with it. You can actually go online and get the free worksheets. If you buy the book, you get the worksheets along with it. And that is the nuts and bolts. But that's only really 20% of budgeting. That is just the math of it, which we struggle with because no one taught us how to do that. And so chapter number four is really about the secrets behind successful budgeting, which plays into very much situational things. What do I do when I have an unexpected expense? We just had this past weekend, my husband was mowing the lawn and he rode over a rock

and it shot up and hit a window that's very large in our house, shattered it into a million pieces, $1,800 right there. Yes, because it's a massive window up high. And what happens when you're hit with that unexpected, rock hits the window, a kid throws a soccer ball through the window, whatever happens, and you're hit with this $1,800 expense.

Does that mean that you give up? How do we adjust to that? I believe that your budget is very much a flexible document. So chapter four is really about how to be flexible with your budget and then also how to stay on track whenever your mindset becomes a problem. Because the rock was an outside situation hitting my window. But sometimes I'm the problem, right? Sometimes my mind is the problem. And I start having these, these temptations with spending money that's unplanned, or these negative emotions

about my budget. And so it's also about how to deal with that. Yeah, I mean, that's, I feel like most people, that's where, when they have that perfect budget, and like that happens and it always does at some point and you never know when it's going to happen. That's when things get derailed. And they're like, well, budgets just don't work because my life is always, you know, something always happens. And no matter what, I can never catch up. And it's important to be able to have that flexibility within your budget. And I know that's why you do also spend some time talking about the importance of emergency funds and sinking funds.

I hear the term sinking fund all the time. I feel like it's an American thing. Not one Canadian has ever really talked about the term sinking fund. I know what it is. It's just like savings account for a specific purpose. But you want to kind of talk about why sinking funds could be a game changer, because I know it really can be like it because I've been using them for years. I just used I just didn't call them sinking funds. But why should they be kind of a really

important component when you're crafting your budget? Oh, my gosh, yes. And yeah, by the way, call it whatever you want. Sinking fund savings account, it doesn't matter. You can make up your own fund name that makes you feel good. But sinking funds are essentially when you set aside money. And in my book, I go through really four types of sinking funds. Setting aside money for something you know will happen, like Christmas or, you know, what else? My HOA dues that are gonna come up every year. Setting aside money for something that you want to happen,

like vacations. Setting aside for something that might happen, like needing new tires on my car. And then setting aside money for things that are just completely unexpected, like the rock hitting our window. So I recommend that. However, you don't have to have all four of them. So I don't even have all four of them because I would rather just have a really large emergency fund and our emergency fund can cover this window situation. However, let me tell you, Jessica, the first time that we

celebrated Christmas as a couple, we were really broke. I was pregnant and Christmas came up and I suddenly felt overwhelmed with the amount of gifts I had to buy and the fact that I was now an adult with an adult job. And I felt like I could no longer give just these really crappy Christmas gifts. And I remember thinking, I don't get a bonus. I'm a teacher. We don't get bonuses. There's no Christmas bonus. And I thought, I did not prepare for this. And it was very overwhelming. It was very frustrating. And it just really put an overall cloud over the season, the holiday. So your sinking fund allows you to think ahead about those types of events and prepare for them. So our family, we have two kids.

We set aside a good amount of money every month for Christmas. We set aside $175. We also have our HOA dues that come up yearly, $1,300 a year. We have flood insurance because we live in Houston, Texas, and it floods here. Our water does not like to seep into the ground. So we have flash

flooding. So we have flood insurance as well. And those are yearly expenses that I just want to set aside money for them. That way, whenever they come due, I'm able to just say, oh, I've got this covered. I have this planned. I thought about this in advance. And it is stress free. There is no overwhelm. There is no frustration. There's no arguing back and forth with my spouse about you forgot to that this was coming up. None of that. It's just let's move the money from one account to another and just keep that up. And we actually have those set up automatically every single month. They're deducted out of our checking account, they go into a high yield savings account, and they live there until I need them. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I've been doing a version of that for years. And I think the reason to Yeah, and you kind of mentioned this is

like, you can have one account for everything, you can have four different accounts, you can do whatever you want. It is really one of those things where it's like test it out, see what makes sense. For me, I realized I needed to really divide them into separate accounts. Otherwise, I would forget all the different things I was saving for and accidentally like, oh, no, I can use that cash to pay for this. And I'm like, oh, shoot, no, it was for my yearly home and auto insurance or something like that. So yeah, I find the sinking funds is so,

so helpful. And yeah, it's as simple as setting an auto transfer every month or every paycheck and just putting it as a line item in your budget. Because then when that thing does happen or that bill comes due, like I do that for property insurance, which is like I pay it. It's such a random, it's like, I don't know, every like two or three months, but it's not super regular. So anyways, I do have to put money in there every single month. But then when the bill comes due, I don't panic like, oh, gosh, where am I going to get the money? It's like, oh, it's already in that savings account that we started a little while ago. So we're OK. Exactly. And you said something that is so key, Jessica. You said it's a line item in your budget. For me, I see sinking funds as a

non-negotiable. For instance, I'm going to save for those most important things, HOA, flood insurance, and those holidays. Those are my non-negotiable sinking funds that I'm not going to send money to my vacation savings account until I've set aside that money every single month. I see it as the same importance as my electricity bill or my water bill. I assign it that priority level. Now, if something happens and my husband loses his job or my business just stops and I stop bringing in income, yes, we can stop contributing to those,

but that's more of like a last ditch kind of solution, because I value that peace of mind over being able to spend that money on something else that might just go out the window to who knows what. Yeah, I think that's really important to mention when you are in that situation where you're like, oh, you know, yeah, husband lost their job or a really big anything that you have to figure out where are we going to get the money? That's where it's easier to see what the priority accounts are to be like, well, we're not touching our emergency fund. We're not touching the sinking funds. We still, you know, want to make sure we're contributing to that. Okay, let's look at like our variable spending, try to cut back their travel fund.

That's a luxury. It's not a necessity. cut back their travel fund. That's a luxury. It's not a necessity. Let's cut back there. It's a little bit less stressful when you know that what's the priority sequence of all of our different accounts. So it's so much easier to find out, okay, where can we hit pause until this is resolved? Absolutely. And you know, what I have is I have just a very simple Google Sheets, where I have all of our expenses, kind of just the average of them. So our average utility bill, our average water bill, average restaurants and groceries. And I literally have it listed out into I think it's four categories.

I have my like you cannot live without this. You have to be able to pay this. And that's groceries, but not restaurants. Yeah, it's our mortgage payment or anything that is a, you have to live with that, you have to pay this. And then the second column is expenses by want. So that would be our travel fund. That would be even my kids' extracurricular activities.

If something happens to us and we don't have money coming in, that's gotta go. Is that fun? No. Will my kids be upset? Yes. But that's the reality of it. And so I'm not going to go into debt letting my son take piano lessons just because I feel bad. So I have our expenses by want and then I have our savings. So this is retirement accounts and then any extra money to our emergency fund, like we'll have to replenish our emergency fund from this window situation. And then I have our charitable contributions.

So it allows me to visually separate out even my expenses in a way that says, okay, this is how much money we're spending every month on our, like what we have to live off of. And the rest is quote unquote optional. And it makes me feel better knowing, okay, what do I need to have in my emergency fund to be able to cover six months of those costs? And if something does go wrong, I have options. Not everything is of an equal priority level. Yeah. And it's, yeah, that's the kind of the key thing is like you need to have those options because that will make, you know, those financial disasters be surmountable when most of us when we don't have that plan and we don't have those options. That's when you're like, well, I've got to use my line of credit, my credit card, get a payday loan. And then you're in a whole other world of like, great.

Now we're in this situation. But speaking of debt, I know you do talk about debt in your book, and you talk about how to pay off debt and still enjoy your life. How is that possible? Because honestly, too, like, speaking about debt, I mean, I think there's so many great, you know, authors and content creators now probably our age who went through a similar situation, talking about it in a very different tone than some of the older money experts of yesteryear that were really, yeah, debt is bad. You're bad if you have debt. You really just got to hit pause on everything until you've conquered this debt. But as we know, that just doesn't work. It's like doing a crash diet, not going to work. So how can people prioritize paying off debt so they can, you know, improve their cash flow be in a better situation,

but not have to sacrifice, you know, having a decent life? Yes, that's a great question. And you know, I think that I did that where I just paid off, I was super focused, and it, it crashed and burned. I did not stick with it. I think that I had that mentality of, well, I make money. I'm contributing to society. I should be able to keep some of it. And I tried just sending every extra penny to debt and it didn't work. So if you want to try that, go for it. And then if you find that it doesn't work, that's when you can say, okay, there's got to be a different solution because it doesn't mean that, like you said, you're dumb, or you're not good at this. So for me, what I like to talk about, what I talk about is prioritizing and really getting clear on what

matters to you. I think that we live in a world where especially with social media, I don't think I felt this way nearly as much. When I was before really social media was big. We live in a world that tells us that we need everything and that we want everything and we see everything and everybody's experiences and it makes us want to those things. And that's not bad. It's okay to want things, but it's also very important for us to sit down without all of these outside distractions and figure out what we really want. Not what Jessica wants, not what Allison wants, but what is it that brings you joy and the most joy? And then asking yourself, okay,

what can I cut out that doesn't bring me joy so that I can pay off debt, but still have these little things or these line items in my budget that do bring me joy. And I'll give you a perfect example. So when I was paying off debt, my husband, I were in this process, he's very much, he's not a spender, he's a saver, he doesn't find joy in spending money. And he could be the person that just sends every extra penny to debt, but he's married to me.

And so he had to realize that we couldn't live our life that way. So I had certain things in my life that brought me so much joy. One of them was my Friday latte. I was a teacher and I wanted to go to Starbucks every Friday to just celebrate that I made it through

the week as a teacher. I made it another week. This is Friday and I'm going to have my coffee. And that is not something that's important to my husband. He doesn't spend money on that. But it was important to me to set aside anywhere between five to ten dollars a week to be able to get a coffee and maybe a little small snack. That was very important to me. What was not important to me was a really nice luxury car or a fancy car. We bought a very simple used Toyota Camry. I did not feel that desire or that need to have a very nice car. And I'm the same way now. But now I would rather take a really nice vacation with my family than have a car. So I think that there's, or sorry, a nice car with a

high car payment, or like, I mean, I drive a Kia, it's nothing exciting. Yeah. And I think that understanding those trade offs, and what I want most is really helpful. It doesn't mean that if my neighbor gets a really nice car that's brand new and clean, has all of the bells and whistles, that I won't want it. But I have to be able to come back and say, okay, but do I want it enough? Or would I rather go on a trip to Hawaii with my family? And that's what I would choose. I'm curious what your thoughts are since you are, you know, big on Instagram. And that is where I feel like Instagram social media has just changed the game for so much. It was easier just to be like comparing yourself to your friends, your family, your neighbors. Now

you're comparing yourself to anybody you've never met across the world that has this amazing looking life. What are some things that people can do? You know, because it's like, I feel like there's kind of no way like some really, just stop going on social media. I'm like, that's usually not possible for most people. Some people are on Instagram for their work or whatever. What are some ways that people can, you know, make sure that they don't get influenced? Even though I know you and me are technically quote unquote influencers, which I hate that term because, you know, I mean, really, I feel like we're just talking about personal finance. I'm not trying to sell you clothes or whatever the hell. So, you know, even for me, I find it difficult and I have

to catch myself to be like, why do I want to spend money on this new wardrobe? Just because I started following a few new people on Instagram. You know, what's really funny, Jessica, I follow this person that's like a minimalist mom or something. And she has this beautiful house, but it's very minimal. And she'll link to things that she has in her house. And I'm like, Oh, I want to buy that. And I'm like,

wait a minute, Alison, you're following her to be able to simplify. I know this minimalist is influencing you to buy stuff. This seems counter. Yeah. But it's like, Oh,

here's the end table I have that I've had for years on end that I'm still happy with. And, and I'm like, Oh, I need that end table. It's literally, I'm thinking I'm picturing the end table right now in my mind. And then I'm like, no, Alison, focus. You have end tables. You don't, you don't even have space for an end table in your living room. And so I think that being aware, right? I think

it's totally unrealistic to say, just don't get on social media. That's unrealistic. I love that you said that. But I use the mute button like no other. I think that there are going to be times in your life when you might be more tempted to buy things than other times. I know I have seasons of the year. My seasons of the year are I want to buy, buy, buy in November, December. And then again, usually like in, I would say like July and August. And those are my seasons of the year where I am more easily influenced. So number one, you have to know yourself. When are you more easily influenced? And when you are and you're scrolling through your feed and you see that and you feel that immediately, that's when I mute people. Because it doesn't mean they're gone forever. It just means that they're muted for now. And I see that as my little way of saying,

okay, this is my way of staying focused. I think the harder thing is whenever it's people you know personally and you feel like you can't mute them or you don't want to unfollow or unfriend them. And I say just, I mean, you can mute them. They won't know if you mute them, right? They won't know. And you can always go back in and manually check up on people. I've done that with people not about temptation for buying things, but more about politics. I'm like, oh, yeah, we're going to mute you. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to be I don't want to be

let myself be influenced by my emotions. It's not their fault that they are putting it out there, whether it's selling something or politics or whatever, it's my responsibility to not let myself become emotional and reactive. And the way that I can take control of that responsibility is by deciding to not consume that content, whether it's for a day, a week, a year or forever. Yeah, yeah, no, I feel like that's definitely something I've been practicing for a while. And it is difficult, especially when you're, you know, there's personal friends on there and you're like, well, I don't want them to not think I'm supportive, but you're like, you know what, this isn't helping me. I don't like getting onto an app with good intentions of being like, well, maybe someone will inspire me today

or has an exciting story to share. And that'll be really motivating. And then you feel like a bit triggered by what they're sharing. And then it'll make you feel maybe worse about your situation because you didn't reach a goal that they've been able to achieve. And then it just kind of spirals. And now you're more a little bit more vulnerable to being influenced. And you're like, maybe if I buy this thing, then I'll feel a bit better. It's really, like you said, so important to be aware and conscious and then do something about it. If something's making you feel bad, then unsubscribe, get out of there. And even if it's temporary, so then when you're maybe in a stronger kind of I consume content from, but also buying things. If I'm ever really tempted and I want at Target. And I had to do like a Target detox. And I had to tell myself, Target's not going anywhere. They're not going away. Amazon's

not going away. These influencers on Instagram aren't going away. You can take a break from them and come back when you're in a better position. And that's what I do for a majority of the things in my life, whether it's about money or not I know I feel like even specifically with Target like we don't have it here we tried to have Target in Canada it just did not work out so they left why not uh you know what I think it's because I think it's because we were expecting American Target like all of the amazing deals and stuff like that but obviously Canada's different there There's different, you know, import export, it just was not the same. We're like, oh, it's actually still a better

experience going across the border and going to like a US target. So yeah, just the pricing, it just did not work out. Yeah, unfortunately. But still, I even see, you know, all these lifestyle influencers or like lots of, you know, memes and jokes about, you know, just going to Target because it's a fun activity, or it's like an event. And if you start thinking of a store where you're supposed to buy stuff as like a social event or something fun to do, then that's going to warp your kind of idea of just like, oh, yeah, no, I'm not just spending money. I'm just this is something fun. It's like, no, no, no. Target is literally a store and they want your money. So don't feel tempted to just go walk around the aisles just for fun because you're going to buy something. And I would go and I'd get a Starbucks coffee

and I would just walk up and down the aisles. It got me out of my house. It got me away from maybe my spouse who was driving me crazy at the time. I had my baby in the stroller where he was happy. And it became this almost, this really negative experience. But what's crazy is that it was intended to be good.

Yeah, you're like, oh, I just want to take a look at some things. But what you're just window shopping, you're looking at things and then thinking about, oh, I'd like to, you know, visualize this in my house and how much better my life will be if I have this in my house. Yes. And suddenly everything in my house wasn't good enough. Exactly. And then you weren't good enough. And then, yeah, just like this. It's not good. Yeah. That's why I had to have a target detox. Yeah then, yeah, just like the spiral. It's not good. That's why I had to have a target detox. Yeah.

I mean, I feel the same way when it comes to kind of those big times of year, like Boxing Day and Black Friday, when I swear everyone's just talking about the deals, deals, deals. And every year I feel this anxiety that I need to take advantage because there's only these few times of year where these big deals happen,

which is not true. Because it's like, you know, there's deals throughout the year on certain things. Sometimes you can get a bigger discount at a random time of year because they're just trying to unload stock and stuff like that. But every year I feel anxiety. I'm like, I need to get something. And the past couple of years, I feel like I put a bunch of stuff in my car and then I, you know, do the practice of like, give it a day or two. And I'm like, I don't need any of this stuff. But I feel like I need to get the deal. And it's like, it's not a deal if you don't actually need it. You're still spending money that's coming out of your paycheck or your bank account.

So, you know, it's just that's the peer pressure of it all. And who's winning? It's all those retailers selling you all this crap you don't need, right? Or the influencers that are linking with their affiliate links to get you to buy it. You're right. You know what I've started doing for all of these types of. Well, really, for me, it's the day after Thanksgiving is I've I've passed two years. My husband and I have gone just away for like two nights.

My mom will watch the kids and we will just get away for two nights. We'll go out into like the Texas Hill Country and rent a cabin and totally disconnect. And that has been so good. And what's crazy is that I probably spend less money on that trip than I would have if I was shopping online and getting all these things. So that's been very, very interesting as well. But I also feel like since COVID, all those stores have extended their sales. Yeah, they're like two weeks. Our boxing week is like two. It's like up until like mid January. So you're like, Oh, well, I missed it. Oh, well, they're like, No, no, no, you can still take advantage. You're like, Oh, my God.

See, for me, I'm always like, Oh, those one time sales now don't bother me anymore. Because I know you guys are gonna want my money. That's true. I'm gonna extend it. So I feel like almost this relief of, okay, it's not this like 48 hours only thing. It's not this, you know, I'm not going and standing outside of a Walmart at 11pm to get in at midnight. It's going to be available for me. And if it's not, will I really miss it? Probably not. Yeah, it's like you were fine before you even knew there was a sale on this product. Exactly. Or before you saw someone post about this thing. And now you feel like you need to have it really, but you literally were just fine before. So yeah, exactly. Something to figure out. You know, before I let you go, I do want to just touch on another important thing, because you do have a section called working with your partner, which I think is so important when you're in a partnership.

And you know, money, money is honestly easier on your own. Like it was so simple when it was just me. And then once it was me and my husband, then you know he's always been self-employed and then I became self-employed it just got so complicated um I'm curious you know you've been obviously on this journey with your own husband uh for a long time what are some things that um with some tips because I get questions all the time about how do I like I'm on this journey trying to get better with my money how do I get my partner on board or this journey trying to get better with my money. How do I get my partner on board? Or they never seem to want to talk about money. How are we going to fix things? So I actually go into depth in that chapter about really how to approach a reluctant spouse or partner. And part of it, honestly, is your partner may never be on board. Like that is the sad reality,

but let's speak in reality here. I've known couples close to me where their partner has never, ever been on board with budgeting or saving money or paying off debt ever. But that doesn't mean that we can't have some sense of control over our finances. I always say that there is something that you are in charge of when it comes to money,

whether that is the stereotypical, like grocery shopping, or maybe it's ordering out dinner whenever you don't wanna cook, whatever it is, making the payments, and maybe you do make an extra payment. You have some sort of control, and so I talk a lot about first how to approach a reluctant partner, how to get them on board. Also, not

just through your words, but through your actions and what they are seeing you do. And then if that doesn't happen, how you can still make progress towards your money, even if they're not on board, because I would love to tell you that every single partner is going to get on board with all of the tips and tricks that I give in my book, but that's not true. It's just not true. Some people are very set in their ways. Some people are very stubborn.

Some people are dealing with lots of issues, money-related baggage from either a previous marriage or their childhood. And we can't just paint this pretty picture that's gonna work out for everyone. But that doesn't mean that it can't work out for you and what you are in charge of when it comes to your money. Yeah, I find, yeah, for all the couples

that I've talked to and worked with, even me and my husband, I feel like in general, it's awesome if both people are like 50-50 partners and ready to do their spending and their budgeting every single month. But I haven't had that in my life. Like we do, I finally have gotten him on board on like, put in your spending in our spreadsheet, and I'll do the net worth for us. And I'll do our joint spending. So he has very

minimal things to do once a month. And then we take, you know, if we need to, we take a look at things, or usually I give him a report like, okay, look, we, you know, our increased our net worth this month, or Oh, you know, we need to cool it on the takeout a little bit. We kind of overspent last month. But I always find that in general with a partnership, when it comes to money management, there's someone who's the leader and someone who's kind of like, you know, a participant, but maybe less involved. And that's okay. Like you can't be like, well, it should be a 50-50. We should share the duties equally. It's rare when that happens. Because when you think about even just splitting household duties, I mean, my

husband pretty much always does the dishes. I just hate doing the dishes, quite honestly. And I do kick in. Yeah, I'm like, I hate the dish. I don't know what it is. Probably like years of just not having a dishwasher and washing dishes. I just like can't stand it. But I'll clean the bathrooms. No problem. I'll clean those toilets. I will do some vacuuming. I can do some all these other things. And so it's never 50-50. Like he pretty much always does all the dishes. So it's about finding out how can we, you know, still feel like we're participating. But, you know, listen, if you're listening to the podcast and you're more interested in personal finance, you're likely going to be the leader of the relationship when it comes to money management. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. You know, whenever my husband and I started, I remember I actually interviewed him on my podcast

not too long ago. And someone had asked him, we did an AMA, Ask Matt Anything. And because my husband's name is Matt. And one of the things was what were some of, I think one of the questions was something like, what mistakes did you make in the beginning? Or did you ever fight about money? And one of the mistakes he said, which I did not know about this, is that he said he feels like we would have been better if we both weren't trying to have our full hand in the situation. So when we first started budgeting, it was a very painful process because we both sat down together, looking at everything, having our hand

in it, talking through it and arguing about things. And instead now it's like I do the details. I'm the detail person. I bring it to him because I enjoy it. He hates the details. So he probably wasn't even in a good mood when we were sitting down to do this. So I think that everyone has their what they enjoy and leaning into that. And like you said, realizing that it's not always going to be 50 50. And that's okay. That's not bad. It's just as long as you're reaching your goals, your goals that you've compromised on together, then how does it matter how you get there? Exactly. I'd say like the last thing I'd say too is even if you're the one doing most of like the tracking and the actual, you know, the tasks involved,

as long as your partner, because I always think I'm like, gosh, if I die, I hope Josh knows how to continue with our, you know, the thing that we've been building all these years. It's like, as long as there's open communication and they're aware and they know where the accounts are and understand what you're doing, then I think that also puts less pressure on them, especially if they have a lot of anxiety, you know, like you mentioned,

based on their childhood or, or, you know, whatever kind of money events happened in their life that at least they're aware. And then if something does happen, then they can, they can hopefully continue. I have an if I die plan. Yeah, Matt and I have an if I die plan. We know what we're doing with life insurance money. Like we totally we've, you know, we have kids. Yeah, we have a mortgage. So we know exactly what we're doing with the life insurance money, because he's a teacher. And he can't I mean, I'm the breadwinner in the house. And he can't, there has to be as for him to stay in this house and raise his kids. There has to be a plan to pay off the mortgage and for him to move closer, you know, work him to stay in this house and raise these kids, there has to be a plan to pay off the mortgage.

Exactly. And for him to move closer, you know, work closer to home, all the things. But even for my business, Jessica, because he knows nothing about my business. Yeah. I literally haven't. Okay, if Allison dies and my coworker knows, turn off all the emails. We don't need to be getting emails from a dead person. Like all these things because he doesn't know. Like he doesn't know where what's all in with all the different checking accounts and savings accounts or the taxes and the sales tax.

He doesn't know any of that. So I literally we have one laid out for personal and business because I just because I want to be able to take the stress off of whoever is going through that. So that way they can focus on the kids and morning. And it is kind of morbid to think about. But I'd rather have a plan and not use it. Yeah, no, I need that. Do you have like a template or something? Like, I feel like that'd be a great downloadable. Right? No, you know, what I did was I have my director of operations. And sat there and I literally, she just typed in a Google sheet, like, okay, if Allison dies, and then we have one for her because she has such a heavy hand in my business. So we have if Kaylee dies and it's literally just like, okay, you need to

do that. Like you need to contact Matt and give him this information. And so it's literally like she has my husband's phone number. She knows who to contact. She knows like what email sequences to turn off, what to turn on, like all of the things. Because I mean, just God forbid, that's putting people in a position to mourn and try to deal with a mess. And I would just rather have them mourn and not have that added mess on top. So this took an interesting turn. I know it did. But I find it's, I mean, that's important.

I'm like, I'm going to work on that today, literally, because I don't think I've written anything formally. But I'm like, that's so smart. That's so, so, so smart. So especially for the business. And we have it like, you know, we have a will and I need to create a document for my mom. I told her I would do this with like, literally just and keeping it in our safe. Like here's all the bank accounts because you're going to have to pay for things, mom. You're going to have to make sure the mortgage

comes out. Here's the mortgage. Like here are the dates. Everything comes out on auto draft. Here's what's in our bank account. Move this money from savings. Like I want if something happens to me, this is if something happens to me and my husband, like if we're on a trip and something bad happens, I want her to be able to not be in a position where she is completely overwhelmed with all of the household things as well. No. And it's like, yeah, even though it's a bit maybe morbid, it is again, this is a really important part of financial management and budgeting really is to have to have this core plan. So you can feel good about what you're doing now. But also, there's a plan for again, when things happen that are terrible, you know, it's, it breaks my heart whenever I see people that are especially like celebrities that have all this wealth, and they didn't have a will or didn't have a plan. And now there's all this this

court battle between all the people involved. Like it's just yeah, these are preventable things, not as exciting or sexy or, you know, they're very emotional, but they're just equally as important. Now, before I let you go, where can people find more information about you? And of course, grab a copy of your book so they can dive into more of the topics that we were discussing in this episode. Of course. So my book is going to be available at Barnes and Noble, Amazon, even in what is that Canada Canadian bookstore? Indigo. Indigo. It's going to be an Indigo. Money Made Easy is releases April 4th. So if it's past April 4th, go grab a copy. You can always order one online. And then if you want to hear more from me that I have a podcast as well, Inspire Budget Podcast, be sure to check it out and tag me on Instagram.

If you grab the book so that way I can share it. Amazing. And also I love your Instagram. I love the kind of budget example videos you do. They're so, so good. And you're like writing, like,

was it calligraphy? I don't know. It's beautiful. I'm like, how do you write so nice? It's so beautiful. Thank you. It's funny.

People are like, I love your handwriting. I just watch it. And I'm like, oh, I remember being in third grade and just totally tuning out my teacher and just practicing my handwriting. I'm like, this has been a long time coming. Sorry, Miss Hall for not paying attention. But I did something with my life around my handwriting. Exactly. Exactly. Well, thank you so much, Allison, for coming back on this show. And I'm so excited about your new book. I hope everyone grabs a copy. Thank you, Jessica.

And that was episode 362 with Allison Bakerly. Make sure to check her out after this episode. You can find her at inspiredbudget.com. And on Twitter, she is inspired underscore budget. On Instagram, just at inspired budget. And also check out her podcast, also called Inspired Budget. And of course, of course, of course, make sure to grab a copy of her new book called Money Made Easy. You can find all the details in the show notes for this episode.

Just go to jessicamorehouse.com slash 362. And I will link to everything to make it nice and easy for you. Okay, so just a few things to share with you about what to vibe it up to, what's been going on. Well, I did share with you that I was recently in Montreal to host this conference called the Invest in You Conference by National Bank. And I've been getting some questions about, oh my gosh, I didn't sign up. I missed it. Hey, guess what's really neat about just technology? It was filmed and recorded and you can watch the replay. I will include a link for it in the show notes for this episode. Also, if you go onto my Twitter, I think I tweeted about it. But I think it should still be just available.

Pretty easy to find on the National Bank website. So make sure to check me out. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot, a lot of fun. Also, and this is for anyone who is, you know, really nice and organized getting their taxes done. And FYI, the tax deadline is May 1st, not April 30th. It is May 1st because April 30th is on a Sunday. But I recently put out a video on my YouTube channel all about how Canadian taxes work. So in case you have no real clue or you think you know, you just want me to maybe explain

things in a really digestible way. I recently put out a video on my YouTube channel, but that is not the only exciting thing about that. The other exciting thing is in the description for that video, you can find a form to enter to win another contest I am running. I am giving away some voucher codes for TurboTax. So if you want to follow up with TurboTax for free, I'm giving away some codes you can enter to win. So I just wanted to let you know in case you didn't even know I had a YouTube channel and you know, it's just a fun contest and it'll just maybe make tax season a little bit easier for you. So make sure to check that out. Other things that you may or may not be aware of, but I have a bunch of amazing, in my opinion, budget spreadsheets on my website, jessicamorehouse.com slash shop.

So if you are looking for a spreadsheet to help you get your money together in like any situation, you're self-employed, you got a side hustle, you're an employee, you're an employee and a self-employed couple, whatever the case is, I probably have a spreadsheet for it. There's like a lot of them. And I've been getting a lot of great reviews. You can look at reviews on the website, which is very, very exciting. So that's one thing that you may or may not be aware of. Another thing is I have an investing course. It is called Wealth Building Blueprint for Canadians. It just passed the two-year anniversary, which is really exciting. And oh my gosh,

I love getting the feedback from my students. The other kind of cool thing about running this course and something that I included was you get a one-on-one session with me, a debriefing kind of session with me after you finish the course. And it's a great way for me to find out what people think. And people love it. People love it. So if you want to find more information about my Wealth Building Blueprint for Canadians course, make sure to go to jessicamorehouse.com slash course or again, check out the show notes for this episode. Well, that is really all I can share with you right now. But thank you so much for listening and supporting the podcast. I recently got not tagged, but I saw a tweet

from the host of the Rational Reminder podcast, which is also a great podcast if you aren't already listening to it, with a little screenshot that they were like number one in the, I guess, Apple podcast investing category. I honestly have stopped looking at podcast reviews or rankings because it just wasn't good for my mental health to see people that were maybe negative or just like comparing myself to others. So I just have not checked in literal years. But it popped up in my little timeline on my Twitter. And apparently this show was number two.

That's kind of cool. So yeah, yes. So thank you for supporting this show. And also thank you to my podcast editor for making this show possible, Matt Rideout. Thank you so much. Well, that is it for me. Thank you so much for listening. I will see you back here next Wednesday with a fresh new episode of the More Money Podcast. Until then, have a good rest of your week and weekend. And, you know, stay cool. Stay cool. This podcast is distributed by the Women in Media Podcast Network.

Find out more at womeninmedia.network.