Morning Good - A Rare Case of Puppetmastering - Episode 55

Episode Date: December 12, 2021

Thanks to Matt and Jake for coming on the show! Follow them both to see anything they have coming up.Matt is on IG @battmowman and Jake @jake_timothy and also has a web series called "Rent Money" with Dan Carney.As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michael_good1125 and on Twitter @agoodmichaelThis podcast was produced by Paxton Fleming, you can find him on Instagram @yaboypax 

Thanks for the F Shack. Love dirty mic and the boys. Hey, are you dirty mic and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They call it the podcast? Morning. I love that.

Yeah, it's me with the boner on the front. Welcome to morning. Well, because it's like in the middle of the episode, every episode go, yo, sorry to interrupt. Can you like hold the mic differently? Because if you hold it right here, I don't want to get a little crackly? Yeah, but it's a part of it to be like, maybe. can I guess comfortable before you start recording. It's just silence and you're like,

hold it in the middle. Thank you. Please. Please touch the other guest. My social skills are at the window, dude. I've just been on Adderall staring at a screen for like 10 hours today. Hell yeah. And they keep checking in on me.

They're like, so it's going well, right? You like it. You've been doing well. And I'm like, I don't have the hard telling that I, can't. Hell. Yeah.

And I can't stand it. Yeah. Yeah. Is it true what they said about it? You can just get up whenever you want and go take a break? I don't. Maybe I can, but like, I don't know what they mean by a break. You know what I mean? A break, I think means like you can walk outside for five minutes.

Like, get back in there. Well, it's like one of those. Scream at the bushes. Yeah. Like, fine. Well, it's like one of those where like, you ever had a job where they're like, like my last job. Like I had.

Take a break whenever does not mean take a break. No, they had like, they had like an unlimited PTO policy. But it's just like, but then no, everybody feels weird about taking it because they don't want to use it. So it's like, we're going to give you unlimited, but we're going to look at you real weird if you actually use the PTO. Whereas like if you have 14 or 15 days to use throughout the year, then it's just like, oh, okay, well then

everybody knows. I'm here with Matt Bowman and Jake Timothy. Oh, hey, what's up? I'm Matt Bowman. It's like when you're in a state with no speed limit. It's not, you can just go as fast as you want. There are states with no speed limits? Yeah, but it's just the police decide when you're going too fast. Oh, that sounds ridiculous. Yeah, it's insane. I assume if

you're white, you can go a little bit faster. Is that, those the rules? You can go three-fix faster. I think it's in Montana, so, I mean, if they see a black purse, they're going to stop them. Yeah, they're like, sheer curiosity. Yeah, yeah, they're like, what is, what's going on with your face? Like, hey, man, are you good?

Like, what's going on? Like, not in a bad way. We're just like making sure you're all right. Are you like a pigmy? Yeah. Oh, no. Because I have a conservative friend who's like, I think I'm moving into Montana.

And I'm like, I feel like that would be a good spot for you. Yeah. I think I know why. Montana is like, there's some pretty liberal parts of that, though. No, I'm sure. Yeah. Beautiful.

Like, like not in terms of the people that live there. But the nature... You've been there? Yeah. The nature is delightful. You've ever seen that movie, a river runs through it? Yeah. A fucking great movie. Is that in Montana? I wanted you... No, that's North Dakota. But it's a good movie. I just want to plug that movie.

No. No. But, yeah, I want to kill myself. No. It's not that. Oh, no. It was so funny, though, because there was this guy walking around the office today. Is this what you were wearing today? Yeah, you can wear whatever you want. You look good. You can wear whatever you want. That's what I chose.

Just like Christmas-y, but like non-denominational? Well, you don't want, when they say whatever you want, that doesn't mean coming with a sleeveless. Like, there are all these rules are like, you still have to kind of follow the rules. Right. I'm just coming with it. I can't say. No, no, go out.

Do it. No, it's a bad someone we all know. Okay. But, yeah, there's this guy walking around because, like, we had a break in a break. They're like, yeah, go to the seminar. And I was like, anything to stop staring at that desk. Yeah. And there was this guy going around and he had a cape on.

It's like this bald, fat guy with a cape. And I was, like, 95% sure he was like the retarded guy in the eye. I thought it was like, because he's wearing a cape. I was like, I don't know why would this guy have any of like a shield? And he's just going around the office. And then I found out he's like just the office coordinator guy who does all this stuff. And he was not. He was like this very elaborate gay guy.

And the slideshows were awesome because half the slideshows were just costumes that he's worn. Wow. Like that, it was kind of sick. I was like, all right. He's like, Christmas is coming. I had like a dope outfit for Christmas. Wow. And he's like, all right.

And then guys just remember this was earlier this year for Halloween. It was like two months ago, but he's still showing Halloween. Is he, was he making these costumes? Or was this like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. He's like, there's me at Bingo. We do bingo for the old person.

It was like him and drag. It's like the bingo thing. Which I was like, I think it's a great costume, but I feel like the old people at drag probably are not excited about that. Yeah, that. But honestly... Maybe they are. Maybe the old guys you don't know what that is and they're like, I'm gonna fuck that woman up there.

What's really funny. Oh, I can't wait for that hot. piece ass to come back to bingo. They get there, the smoker bread. Oh, God, damn, no. You ever seen somebody that's, like, really flamboyantly out there like that? And you're just like, oh, that's what my grandma thinks all gay people are like, you know what I mean? Like, but it's just like, no, that's just that crazy person.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But this guy, there is like, well. That's just a lot of gay people. That's true. I guess you're right. That's just, that's just 75. It's just like the coolest ones. Yeah, yeah.

Well, but the thing is, though, this guy is, like, genuinely like, aw. You know what? You watch me, this guy is, like, amazing. Like, this is 20 minutes of slideshows, and all of it has been. He did his singing introduction for everybody coming up. He, like, remixed everybody's names and songs. That's awesome, dude. Yeah, yeah.

That's awesome to have a guy like that in your office. But he wasn't like a dick, you know what I mean? It wasn't like one of those things that he would be like, shut the fuck out. Because that could have easily gone the other way. Yeah, because there is that, like, we experienced the show the other night. Oh, my. He's just, like, super, like, has, like, a lot of happy energy in him and just spreads it around. Yeah.

That's great. You know what he spreads? Ass cheeks. I thought you're going to say AIDS. Statistically. Wait, wait, does your office have a Christmas party? Is that what he dressed up for? No.

This guy doesn't need any special occasion. No, no, no, no. He was just talking about how the holidays are coming up. This is his pre-holiday outfit. Yeah, but he was showing like past, I don't know where the cape and the shield came from. That was, I don't know what was going on with that. Yeah.

But then he was just showing past holidays and other things. It's just him dressed up for May the 4th, which was in May, and he's still putting it on the slideshow. This meeting apparently happens every two weeks, so I assume he's had an opportunity since then to show his... Wow. Why do I feel like every week he just... What if that's just part of every slide show is just 20 minutes of just like, just to remind you guys, I dress fucking dope. Yeah, and you never see the same costume twice. Yeah.

Yeah. He comes in overnight to take pictures of him, like, through the office. Is that a fucking tree for Arbor Day? Hell yeah, dude. Assless tree. Did you see the guy who won the dog There's a how, was it Halloween? Yeah, Halloween, there was like a dog.

We went to a dog parade. And the dogs like, it's like people dressed up with their dogs are crazy elaborate costumes and stuff like that. And then who wins every time is this gay guy And his like stallion of a dog. I don't know what do you call like one of those It's like a great day, not a great dame.

It's like some cock. Greyhound. No, no, no, no, no. The dog. It was just some dog. dog that was like just a mystical dog. Like the dude obviously had like just, you can tell I put $400 into the cost. Yes.

Wow. Damn, dude. That must be weird to have a dog just have that. That's your pet. Oh, one of those. Are you saying it would be weird to have a dog? No, like such a manicured like purebred animal. Yeah, a primed prop.

Yeah. You're like, do you like snuggle with this thing? It's just like, no, this is, in my, I'm like, no, this is just a, this is a dog. Like, this is a, this will eat garbage. Like, it does not need this treatment, you know? You stopped hitting it, it would eat trash. Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

You think all the hit their dogs? All gay guys? No. I guess you didn't specify. You just had all them. They didn't... That'd be a fun of stereotype starts spreading around.

Oh, in the, okay. I think there's enough context where you could have... I didn't follow up. In the dog show, do the people hit their dogs? Like, the people that get to the Westminster Dog Show, they probably hit their nose.

Minstrel dog show? Westminster. It's like the one where they all go, like, they prance around. Oh, yeah. Which one were you talking about? If you were talking about like a fucking parade or some shit that happens here. Oh, oh, wow. Like

that Halloween costume dog parade? Yeah. You sounded so condescending when you said the fucking Halloween costume dog parade. You don't sully myself with that. Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's abuse at its own way. Just stuffing your dog in a costume. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I mean, somebody obviously dressed their dog as AOC. Yeah. And it's just... Are you saying that that should definitely happened or you saw it? I saw it. Oh, God. And everyone that's suck of I was like Yay Night good one

And some people are like Yes Yeah You mind if I hit that jewel dog I only invite him Every time I just rip this jewel So hard dog Get addicted to it

So you invite me back all the time I love doing this podcast Dude I I don't smoke Yeah that's good That's how we like it I don't smoke And so like I still get like

An incredibly intense Like nicotine head buzz from it. And so whenever I do, I'm just like, okay, well, I can't do anything

for that's 10 seconds because it's just crazy still. Yeah. And I don't want to do it too much so that that feeling happens. Goes away.

Yeah, I usually love throwing like a dip in because it gives you like, yeah. It's great for car rides, but then you get nauseous.

This is my progression of doing dip. It's awesome. It kicks in. Then you get nauseous and then it's gross and you're coughing up stuff. But it's worth it

for that first five minutes of like, yeah, we're doing this. I don't know if I've ever done that. it's like a terrible hangover. It's like an immediate hangar.

Yeah, you get a hangover from too. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It's like two seconds later. You're like, yeah. Yeah. But it does feel really nice for like a really small amount of time. Dude, like three minutes. It's awesome.

And then you're like coughing and you're like into my throat. Because you always want to get it out of your throat. I've swallowed dips spit one time. It was pretty gross. Yeah. Isn't it really bad of like really terrible if you like actually if you swallow it? Like if you swallow the chew? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. I never done that. I've just swallowed the spit. But like I threw up. I think my buddy's, said the one time he got like really fucked up in college and like shit himself and threw up everywhere just kidding and he's just like oh and in the vomit was just like a bunch of dip he's like oh that's why i oh dang yeah yeah yeah he had a bad night yeah it sounds pretty rough yeah don't you get

like nicotine poisoning from that something i don't know if you're fucking he's a nurse now he turned it around yeah i'll throw like three those zim pouches in a one those zim pouches they're not as good as no for some reason like i don't know why the actual tobacco nicotine is a better buzz. I don't smoke. I genuinely think it's like how beer and wine give you a different drunk. I think different types of nicotine give you different. Yeah, that would make sense. Just process. I'm so self-contch about my girlfriend listening to my podcast because she's probably like, this is the most obvious. A bunch of dudes talking about nicotine. I never want to do it while she's

here. She here right now? Yeah, she's in her room. Oh, hey, well. In her room. In her room. Always got to record a podcast. We're in Michael's room. Yeah. Things aren't going well. I will sleep here. I We're on the couch. I'll sleep here because, like, it'll get so loud downstairs. It's like a bar right below me. And, yeah, it's fucking so loud.

But, like, you can't hear it from this room. But in that room, it's, like, just blaring. Oh, wow. And it's just straight techno for, like, hours to, like, for him. I can hear it a little bit. Yeah, but, like, when you're asleep with earplugs and you can't. I guess if you're, yeah, if, yeah, if we stop talking and aren't entertaining, you can hear the pot.

You can hear the down there. It sounds like they're like a party bus just like is parked right outside. Oh, yeah. It's that every night forever for the rest of my life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he doesn't. Dude, right as I left the pair, there was, like, there was legitimately a giant party bus that pulled up,

and one person got off. Just nobody else. There'd be so many if he invited so many people, just nobody. He's like, well, I already spent the money. Stephen, you ready to go? Was it the mitzvah tank? No, it was like a legit, double-deck party thing

that was like, and I did lie. More people got off, but I thought it would be funny if this one guy got off. But it was, it was like a bunch of, like, older people that, like, They were, like, in their 40s or 50. Old, I don't know. They're adults, you know.

Just trying to make it funny. You're trying to make the truth funny. Yeah. Yeah, but they're fucking old. Yeah, but they're a piece of shit, you know. Get out of here. God. Yeah, I saw the craziest thing that you were there.

So there was a citizen's arrest the other day. It was wild. This dude threw his mail in the mail slot, like, wherever you deliver mail, and this homeless guy comes up and just throws a fire in right afterwards. Which, okay, can I ask, you've, I've heard you tell this. and I've told multiple people. So you keep saying he threw a fire.

He just had a ball of fire? No, no, no. He had like something on fire. I don't know what it was. Okay. Yeah, he didn't have a ball of fire. That would be fucking cool. You'd be like, I wouldn't want

a Citizens Arrest that guy. He's just gonna spontaneously combust. No, yeah. That'd be a good podcast. There's definitely a podcast named Citizens Arrest, right? I guess so. What would it be about?

It's probably like legal shit. Or it's just like... Or it's just a bunch of, what do you call him? Like, a militias. guys. Oh, yeah. Remind me a circle back to militias,

because I have something on that. Gotcha. Malicious. What was I talking about? The guy who, yeah, the guy, so this guy literally puts the homeless guy in an arm bar.

He goes, that was my fucking mail you just burned. He's like, that's an important piece of mail. You're not going anywhere. I called the police. And he just has the guy in an arm bar for like,

probably like 10 minutes while the police show up. I mean, it was at least five that I was there for. And it went on before I got there, which is nuts. The fucking, I guess I forgot that the,

that there was five. involved because the fire department showed up and I was just like well what are you fucking guys gonna do like you can't arrest this guy it is funny how like I think the fire department is technically part of like the first response team so no matter like they're coming but yeah there's so many times where it's like well why dude they're all yeah I always see them show up when they're yeah you're taking up space like a fire truck isn't a small vehicle a lot of times they have them come just to like secure a scene I get yeah I don't know yeah but it was wild what's what's like the legal of a citizen's arrest? That's a good question because it's also kidnapping. Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Like, that's...

The guy just has to be more guilty than kidnapped. I don't know. Not really, but like, that's... Do you have to read them their Miranda rights? Yeah, I don't know. He definitely did not.

He was like, fuck you, bitch. That's my fucking man. I wonder, I bet she was like a... One of it was just like a letter to like his buddy or something like that. Just like, just some dumb ass. Nothing. Yeah, yeah.

No, I don't know. But that's, did you think about how much that fucks up your day though? Somebody's just waiting for weeks for like their work check. Oh, yeah. Like I, I mean, if there was anything else in there, it was, well, maybe it wasn't. Also, if somebody that works in mail, mail is fucking stupid. You send things through email.

Yeah. At this point, yeah. Yeah, unless it's like, I don't know, pictures of kids naked. I don't know why you're not emailing it. Actually, that might be the only thing you should be mailing. Yeah, I don't think of anything else. Why would you not send it through? Like, what other purpose would that be?

Yeah. Well, if you're over 65, you send mail all the time, like to your grandkids and give them a dollar or something. My grandparents don't do that shit. Really? It's crazy. You can't, it's like illegal to send cash through the mail. Real quick, my grandma sounds bored. You can, like, connect your bank account to anyone's bank account.

Is it legal to send cash through the mail? Oh, my grandparents do it all the time. Yeah, but like no one's going to stop. I don't think my grandma. I think she's bored talking to me. I'm not, every time I call her, she's like, yeah, well, anyways, it was great talking to you. I'm like, it's been like three minutes. Like, I don't think she thinks I'm interested.

She doesn't have any... What does she have going on? Yeah, that's obviously. Yeah, yeah. How old is your grandma? Like 80, 70 or 80, something in there? Did she... I know my grandpa's like...

There's a 20-year window. I know my grandpa was 88, and I think he's 10 years old than her, so I think she's 78. Oh, wow. Okay. Do your grandparents ever talk about, like, talking like a morbid way about dying?

No. I honestly don't talk to my grandparents. I'm just realizing this down. I got to keep up with that. Which makes... her not wanting to talk to you even more poignant because it's not like you guys talk all the time. Yeah, she doesn't know what's going on my life.

She's doing comedy, yeah, it's going great. Yeah, but it just sounds like she's like, this is just not. Like, I could see the disinterest. It's like, she'll cut it off faster than me. She's listened to the podcast, and she's like, I can't be associated. Yeah. She's like, I'm a come town lady. He's like, I'm a chopper.

I'm a choppo, chopper. I saw my grandpa over Thanksgiving. He's like 93 or something. He's really old. And he, everything he says, like, he's a really happy dude, but everything he says is about dying. It's fucking crazy. Like, someone was talking about, like, a law

they're passing in New York or whatever. And he was like, oh, glad I'm getting off the train before that. It goes into effect next week. He's like, yeah, man. He'd say that about like pretty much anything new. Whether good or bad, he's like, I don't care. This has nothing to do with me.

God. Man, that's crazy. That's old. Yeah. That's so old. It's too old. Like, you can be here when my like cousins would ask him like, Grandpa, do you remember like this thing we did two months ago? He's like, like, are you kidding me? I'm processing

so much information. I still haven't gotten through Y2K guy. This turkey reminds me of like the first Thanksgiving I remember. You do got to keep a lot. I've always wondered that like, what if dementia? I know they can scientifically prove it, but it would be interesting if it was just your brain not being able to process any more information.

Yeah. It is your load. Yeah. Well, there is like stuff like that. I know Alzheimer's

they know it's like holes in your brain or something. Yeah. Which you also get from doing Molly. I don't know if you're related,

but what's like the... It is. My grandpa was fucking dope. Is there like a number that scientists have that's like equivalent to like gigabytes of storage for the human brain?

No, because everybody's different. You know what I mean? That's true. There's some people that can't. Just fucking so dumb. Yeah, yeah.

And all of them do stand up. You can be like so fucking stupid and there's no like disease attached to it. Yeah, there is. This is called being retarded. Yeah, but sometimes people are just fucking so stupid. You mean somebody that's just like, wow. But you know they're legally that though. If they're having IQ, it's like legally if you're below this level, you are bad.

I guess that's true. Yeah. Yeah. I guess. Sometimes you just meet people that she's like, you should take a test. Yeah. Maybe like a really old, dumb guy. And you're like, how do you make it?

Where? Yeah, dude. How are you seven? Ugh. Yeah. My thing, too, is I don't want to take an IQ test because I feel like I would do horrible on it. I don't even know.

I don't like any of the tests. I don't like the IQ. I don't like the Myers-Briggs gay tests or whatever they do. Myers-Brig is like a personality thing where people are like, I'm an MJ-7-4, and you're like, what? Okay, quit basing your personality on this.

Yeah, that's weird. I think he says it's like a gay scale. No, I was joking. He's like, if you land on this. Gay-scale. That's why I'm terrified. to take it. That's such a funny test.

It's like literally like an IQ test, like apples and oranges and like moving stuff, blocks and stuff like that. It just says you're K. You're gay. It's crazy. Like 50 years ago,

that could have been your entire scientific career. Like I just designed a one through 10 scale of just how gay you are. And universities are like, here's another grant. There you go.

Keep working on it. This is the tax dollar at work. I took an IQ test. That's always the funny that people were like scientists. I'm like, you know, I could pay a scientist

to literally say that everybody America's gay. Every scientist is so conflicting. It's like, I get people are like, you don't want to believe, I don't know, this is not an anti-vax thing. It sounds like I'm about to go in Iran here. But it's like one of those things, it's like,

it sounds like it's an anti-gay thing. Yeah, it's not what it is. But I feel like that is something people do with like, they're like, yeah, scientists, which there's a begillion of them. And they all, we'll say completely conflicting things. I guarantee you can find an anti-global warming scientist. Like probably you can find a thousand of them

that to support that. You'd be like, no, I listen to, to, and I can name off, I guarantee you if I put two seconds Everton, I could find a bunch of anti-global warming scientists and then just argue that point with people. Oh, for sure. Who were your scientists? And they would have zero names. And I'd look so cool. And then everybody would blow me.

I would run the world. You bet if I hit that? Sounds like a plan, dude. What are we doing this for? Let's go do that. Sounds great. When is it, if you take an IQ test and you have a high IQ, when is, when would you ever be able to tell someone that? When is it appropriate to bring up? The doctors. Oh, God. But when is that even

Job interview? Just like, yeah, I don't want to brag it. The doctor is measuring your height, and you're like, I have a 145 I care. Whatever, dork. I'm a doctor. Why do they still measure your height? I have it on my driver's license. I'm 25 years old.

I'm not going to... It has to be for crimes. I think. You think so? Right? Yeah. That or like... Well, it makes sense why pediatric doesn't go.

You've grown this much. Sure. Or I guess maybe like as a, like, when you get super old to make sure you're not, like, fucking bending over. But they can see that. visually. They're like, you're really like 5'10, but your hunchback is like... But yeah, like, I guess true.

Like, why is it on your ID? It just goes all the way down to eventually the oldest guy is just sucking his own dick. That's how much your back benching. He's really old. Dude, this guy's awesome. He is rimming himself. Yeah.

Bottom of his chin. They're like, this is the oldest man. Like, you know, it's always like a Chinese guy. Yeah, dude. Just like in his legs. Doc's like goals. I think it's all the time on YouTube I'll have like a recommended video.

It's like, this guy says he's like a hundred and 90 years old that it's just a Chinese guy in like a village somewhere. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nobody knows how old that guy really is. That guy's never been to a doctor. No, no, not once, yeah. I'm 89. I'm sure you are. Yeah, whatever. Yeah, there's no way to measure that. See the long form birth certificate. Yeah, I was in, how's yours, y'all Thanksgiving? We're doing a Thanksgiving recamp.

Good. Was that, uh, just did it here? I had a couple people over to the place, uh, hung out. All right, moving on, Jake. Yeah. It was very uneventful. It was nothing crazy happening. Yeah, I had a good time. I got drunk for the first time in a while. I'm not going to say for the first time. Like really, really drunk. I always get stupid when I get drunk the first time in a while. I do dumber things because my body's like, really, I know alcohol is worse for you, but I am better off drinking more often.

Because my tolerance is higher, my hangovers are better, and I can control myself better. Yeah, that's alcoholism. I mean, it is, but it's like... Actually, I'm better off. I drink more because my hand stops shaking. Yeah. more focused? Yeah, I have fun, dude.

I drank it, like, bourbon, some nice bourbon. It was great. Wow. Good time. Yeah. I got a little bit, but that was just because I didn't eat

like all morning because I was waiting for the thing and I had a couple beers beforehand. And you know, like, dude, Thanksgiving is kind of annoying because you don't ever know where to start. Yeah.

It's like, all right, dinner's at 4 o'clock because does that mean I start drinking at 9 a.m. Or does that mean I start drinking after? Because I don't like drinking that early on the day. I'm really like...

Sure. Because I hate drinking and then stopping and then starting again. like I'd rather just drink from 9 p.m. onward. I'll start having one or like just like one like when the football game starts. So like 12.30-ish, 1231. Yeah.

I just have, I don't get, I didn't even get that fucked up. I just got a little bit buzzed because I was, had nothing in my stomach. I was sick. I'm sick for like three. Oh, I just hate your vape, probably bad. Yeah. It's just allergies. Yeah, I bet, dude.

Yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't even take that. I was going to ask so now I'm not. So I think it's just allergies. I'm sorry. Thank you for taking that. Thank you for not tempting me. I would have let you do it anyway.

I just wanted to scold you for it. Yeah, I've just, I had like a three-week thing, and it's like, I took like a week off drinking was still sick, so I was like, all right, this is just not going to pass. I'm just going to have to drink through it. And then the night before Thanksgiving was fun because, like, everybody's back in town. Yeah. We had good shows.

What? We had good shows. Yeah, I was in here. Oh, that was great. I loved it. I went back home, hit up a local open mic. There was this awesome old guy there. Hell yeah.

Who was just reading stuff. First of I heckled everybody on stage. Of course. That was first open mic, I've done like four months. And I was like, all right, I'm going to do it. And it's weird because it's like, it was just random people at a bar compared to like doing it open mic. You're like, everybody you know in New York. But it was like this old guy.

And he's just like, yeah, I fucked your wife. Just to everybody on stage. You just saying stuff like that. And then he gets up there. I think he's got like a track suit on. He's like 50. And he's got all of his notes. He's just saying the worst thing, but he's reading them.

No. It was hilarious. Like, it was actually funny. But he was just reading just horrible shoes. but just like, and then he would like move to the next, like. And yeah, flip the page. He said this phrase one time, which was awesome. He goes, I want to drain my come into her skull.

And I was like, that is the most graphic thing. I've heard in my whole entire life. Drain. Like that's Jesus. Into the skull. Wow. And then right after that, you were like, I fucked your wife. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But that was fun. And then I did one show where there was a big poster for the town's local militia. and so my buddy hopped on stage and started fucking with him and this dude stands up he goes, you ever killed a man before and the guy was like

no, have you? He goes, yes. So don't go start talking about combat. And then he's like, oh shit, somebody's got some real PTSD. Like the guy I know, I've met him,

he's my buddy Christoph he was in town, red hair guy, long hair. He will just like, he doesn't care. He'll just start like roasting whatever. I'll make it sound worse. He doesn't hate veterans,

but he's just like kind of like just shitting on this guy. And then it gets so weird and he's like, Jesus, I don't know you're going to be so sensitive for somebody who's killed people. I didn't realize you could be such a pussy. And then the guy's like, I'm a real sensitive man. It was the most awkward shit.

What a, what a coming together. And then in the middle of the set, he just walks up and shakes the guy's hand, Christoph's hand, and then just like left the room. But I was like, dude, I've never heard the first heckle is, have you ever killed a man? And like, not even like, the dead serious. Is this why you wanted to bring up militias? Yeah, yeah.

Because I was like, yeah, because I was like, yeah. Because there were people from the local militia that were like, yeah, that's us. What is that even from the local? Like, how do you start a militia? Isn't that just a bunch of dudes hanging out with guns? I think so, yeah. We're doing a militia.

I was going to say, yeah, like, we're just done no gun militia. We're doing militia. Yeah, every podcast is a militia. Is it gang a militia? No, because they're not fighting for the government. I guess that's true. So what, does it have to be your motives as well? Wait, I thought the militia is against the government.

But a lot of... The militia is like in case the government becomes tyrannical. Yeah. They are the army. of the people. But then don't they also sell like crank and shit? The militia.

Sometimes. Oh, that's a gang. I guess. But then what's the line? So is the line... Where's the Venn diagram? Yeah. It's in the middle

of a militia and a gang. So it crosses from militia to gang. They're allowed to. Yeah. Does it cross from militia to gang? Yeah, when like drugs are involved or like illegality is involved?

I think when black people are involved, people call it a gang. That's true. I don't. I'm just saying that's what... I think when you look at it on paper, that's how people, That's how people

Raid. Well, how would a militia, like, raise money? That's so sad. I donate to my local militia. Every weekend. Stand outside of the grocery store. So I guess then what are they doing? Donate in case the government.

Do they just have guns? They're just preparing for, I don't know. It's like the same, they're like, we're doing this just in case the government takes over or everyone becomes zombies. They're dorks. Yeah, I think it's kind of cool. I could, I think it'd be fun to go to a meeting,

just see what they're, about. I feel you got to get like brought in or something. Probably, I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. I think it'd be fun to go to a lot of meetings just to see what's up. If they're just squatting up and going to the bar, I feel like you could just add like, can I come hang out? Tag along. Yeah, with the boys,

with the militia. Yeah, the picture was like I forget, it was like a skull with like a come draining into it. Yeah, no, yeah, come. No, it was like a gold star, like you know, the sheriff stars? Yeah. And then like a bullet for the other eye and like two guns crossing like the skull and crossbones. They're never

subtle, are they? No one, no one's into militia. It's just like, yeah, so it's just kind of like what I do, like on Tuesdays. No, they have the most on the nose marketing. Yeah. You know who probably militias? Those guys, not to just bring up a serious topic, but those guys that shot him on

Arbery, that's definitely what, like, a militia is. Sure. Isn't it just two guys that take guns? Like, we're going to take the law into our own hands. Like, it is people playing bad man. Is two people a militia? You know what I mean? Like, what's the line of a militia? I don't, yeah, I guess two, yeah. You'd have to have two doing guns?

They probably do like train and pretend they're the army. Sure. It's definitely very larpie. That's why I'm, oh man, that's why it's so fun to see. Yeah, yeah.

Because rarely are the people that are in them in shape or people that should be in a militia. Yeah, of course, yeah, yeah. I mean, two of the guys were they're just getting hammered on like a Tuesday night. Well, it's because the people

that should be in a militia are in the army. Yeah, of course. Well, it's also like, it's like, dude, the people, it's like the Batman thing. Batman, anybody who dresses up as Batman is the farthest thing

from Batman. Yeah, absolutely. Nobody dresses up with Batman is like super like yoked guy he could actually fight crowds. Absolutely. I wonder what the most elite militia in the United States is.

Is there a, there has to be a database. There's got to be some crowd boys. Are they a militia? Maybe, I don't know what you call them. I guess, you know what? I gotta be honest. What are those guys?

The proud boys? Like, what are they? It started as a joke, right? It was like Gavin McGinnis. Yeah, I know, I know. And then he's kind of like backed out and is like not really a part of it anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then now it's just like a group of guys. I saw one at like an anti-vags protest a couple weeks ago. So they're just all over anything. Yeah, yeah, but it's not. Anybody says white supremac group, it's definitely not. No. It's like, the leader is like a Hispanic man. So that would be like bizarre if it was like.

So are they just like men's rights people? It's, you ever, I feel like they're just like middle-aged men that like memes. Okay. The memes that- Well, guess what? I'm joined. Sign me up.

The middle-aged men that have sent me memes Like in my family or like people I've worked with Have sent me the most fucked up Like insane memes of anyone I know. Really? I'm gonna a couple group chats are pretty bad. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, but I get what you're saying. It's like certain memes. Yeah, because I don't know what Because every I hear the proud boys, dude, the proud boys You should show up or exaggerate what they're doing. It's like a guy. What are they though? It would be like saying, yeah, it's really.

really, like, not as big as people think it is. Like, I'm sure it's, like, you know what I mean? Like, it's one of those things that, like, I'm sure there's different chapters of it. I'm sure it's not as like... Sure. But it is an official organization. I guess. Technically? Yeah, but in what sense?

Yeah. Okay. Just have a uniform. Yeah, like, they don't have funding. They're not anything like that. I do. Do they? Yeah, let me check the website. They probably just throw money together. Yeah, crowdsourced or they have a fucking, what's the thing?

Barbecue. Pay for my school. My car got totaled. Go fund me. Go fund me. Thank you. Wasn't there a guy? Proud bots?

That's something different, man. Proud boss? They're really trying to have me avoid this website. That's just the opposite of a girl boss. So a normal boss. Did they have a website or is it just like a 4chan page? It's just, it's all one subreddit. The leader is Enrique Tario.

Okay. Definitely not a white supremacist group then. No, no. Well, if you look at him, it's so. He also looks, he looks Afro-Latina. Ooh. Or Latino. How do I join?

Latino X. Proud Boys.com. Hell yeah. The Southern as fuck podcast. Hell yeah. Oh, dude. Let's get those guys on. The Proud Boys.

Oh, no, this is like a fake thing, I think. Subscribe to Sounds Like Hate Podcasts. Learn more about groups like the Proud Boys. Come on, don't be fucking bitch about this. Oh, so that, I bet those people are... Clearly you have a stance. Yeah, come on. Come on.

I bet you're really fun to talk to. Give them a shot. What have they done besides storming the Capitol? Were they in on that? They were there. But I mean, also like everybody was. Sure. There's like a black dude that stormed a kid.

That's so the funniest picture of that. He's just like zoning out. Yeah. Yeah, whatever. But I pretty sure that there's, yeah, I don't know. It looked like fun, is what I'm trying to say. Yeah. Turns out that guy didn't storm the Capitol.

I did that show at a halfway house. And there's a guy there who they said Storm the Capitol. And I was like, that's a fucking serious hangover. I can't imagine. up. You're raising your hand. It looks like you're about to ask a question. They're like, see it in the podcast.

You're like, can I have. Can I please? Can I, please? I've been here for a second. Just being cool as fuck, dude. You just holding the mic with my thumb, dog. I don't need to hurt my other fingers. Get on my left, dude.

Almost every group saw. I can't think of a good group. No. Yeah. I mean, I think Burr has that bit where you're just like, fuck your group. Like, you're so lame that you got to join a group. It's kind of true. Yeah.

Like, no, don't join a group. The only group that I'm in is just like the three dudes that I go watch a football game with. Like, that's it. And that's just called. having friends. You don't need a group. Dude, could you imagine having a leader?

That's so fucking lame. Just some guy that tells you what to do that week. He's like, guys, we got to see. And you're like, I'm proud of him. He's a smart guy. Yeah.

Could you imagine being like a fucking 36-year-old man with just no identity? Yeah. When the proud boys come along and you're like, fuck yeah. He's my brothers. To be fair, though,

I kind of get it because you're just like looking at your wife and your kids and like everybody else fucking sucks at that age. Like, this job working out, people there seem nice, but I'm like, if I had to choose between hanging out those people

or hanging out of the proud boys, I would hang out with the proud boys. 100%. Dude, I've gotten that feeling of like every job I've had like in an office. Like I'm 28. I'm not young, but I'm younger. But like when I would be in an office, like right out of college,

I'm like, okay, this is my job. I'm doing this, but I've got like, I want to go other places. I've got other goals. And then you see people that are like 40. And you're like, oh, this is your life. Forever. Like, this is what you do. And it's like, oh, my God.

That's like, you have multiple people at home that are depending on you for this income. Yeah. And it's like, you're stuck. And it's like, oh, well, fuck me, dude. That looks awful. Oh, yeah. I mean, the job I work now, it's like, it's a moving gig. Right.

Yeah, your job, those people are better. I'd rather hang out with blue collar workers than anything else. The people hang out with a fucking awesome. They're so funny. Yeah. They're like, they're awesome to hang out with. But it's like the only thing any of them do is this job. Right.

So, like, at the end of the eight hours, they're all down to just, like, lollygag and bullshit for five more hours to get overtime. And I'm like, I kind of like, I'm pursuing a dream. I don't mean to be like an asshole. I've got other things. Yeah, I got to leave. Yeah. I liked everyone I've done is all. Like, I remember when I worked construction, my favorite was this guy.

He was like, you know, the prospector from a toy story too, or whatever that guy is? The guy who has, like, the... He looks like a proud boy. So this guy, this guy, every morning, it'd be like 5 a.m. doing construction. He'd sing this song. He's like, Trump train rider Bam, bam, bam, boom. He's our guideer.

Bam, bam, bam. He's a survivor. Bam, bam, bam. Go to build that wall. Tree top tall. Trump train rider. One verse is like, He'll the reason, cunt. And it's every day.

That's the whole verse. There's nothing that rhymes with it. Everything he would say is just like, dude, just so over the top. He's like, build that whole 10 inches deep. You know, 10 inches are I got to shove my cock in the ground to fucking show you. And you're like, dude, the fact that, like, the idea that they would ever have, like, an HR meeting here would be hilarious.

Like, you know those little, like, sexual harassment videos you got to take? Yeah. And one guy, this guy told me a prank he pulled on somebody, right? He said one time he blindfolded a guy, told him he was going to get a stripper. I don't know if this is a legit story or if this guy was just trying to sound cool, which is a bizarre way to try to sound cool. He said he blindfolded this guy who fucked with him, blindfolded his sister, and somehow had his sister blow him as a prank. And I'm like, either this happened or why are you trying to make this a story that happened? Wow.

Yeah. Honestly, pretty good prank. No. That's a crime on many levels. Yeah. It's something. It takes so much organization. That's true.

That's true. What is? It seems very much rape, but I don't know how it is. I think that's a militia. Yeah. I don't know. It's a rare case of puppet master rape. It's a step below jigsaw, but a step

above normal rape. Yeah, that is like weird. I don't know. Puppet master rape. Get the act out of the hands. The judge is just saying that like, what kind of rape is this? He's like, puppet master rape. Like, how long is he go to jail for over that?

And you're like, oh, fucking, this isn't a crime. It's just a weird story. It's too silly. Yeah, because, like, in a way, it's like, all right, that guy didn't consent to have sex to that person, but you're not having sex. And he does consent out. He's just blindfolded. So technically he's not, he's awake and consenting.

He just doesn't see who he's having sex with. Wow. But he also is agreeing to have blindfolded sex with somebody. Yeah. I don't know. I guess the thing would be her. Like, what did she think was happening? She thought she was blowing some dude.

But, like, that's also, like, blindfolded. That's pretty impressive. This wasn't the random guy I thought I was blowing. You know what I? That's a weird defense. Yeah. Scooby-Doo comes in. to do that. Do they pay her?

Do they have, like, a prostitute or something? Well, I think we've established that they didn't, because this is a most likely made-up story. Totally. Totally. I think he says it was like a pitch-black room, so I don't know. Oh, wow. Okay, we're getting, we're adding very specific details. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a... It was a starry night in a pitch-black room.

But the guy just was laughing, so he's like, it's so funny because he got blown by his sister. And I'm like, all right, you guys are way better than any office I've ever worked in. That's pretty bad, but like, I mean, if it's between that and And, yeah, dude, office is, like, I don't even- There's an office funny guy in my office.

Oh, is he, is he funny? Is he the costume guy? No, no, that guy's the man. Okay, I will say this. We're going to cut gay cape guy out of the mix, because that guy is awesome. That guy ricks. He's the only joy of light in that company.

But it's also just like, it's like people are giving presentations. It's like they're doing like the worst stand-up. They're like, so, you know, yeah, I was working a little slow today, almost as if I was with the Johnson department. in. And everybody's like, oh, dude, roast. Dude, it is. And I was like, this is insane. Like, I felt, I'm like, how do you guys not see how wild this is?

It's like, it felt like I was going crazy. I was, like, sitting there. I'm like, this is insane that, like, and every other joke was that. It was like, yeah, well, it looks like we're not on South Street. Ah, and they're like, oh, come on, bud. That's like, in my job, I'll, like, go into a corporate office to just move shit. And I'm dressed like this. I smell like shit because of a moving shit all day

and covered in like soot and dirt and then all the people that are just sitting at computers all day will just ask me question they're like, you just like pick up anything? They ask me like, what's it like out there? I've been outside of three weeks. It's so, it's so quiet.

It's like corporate. It's fucking bizarre. But it is, like sometimes sometimes though like it depends on the kind of company because then like I've worked at like places that people like are making a little more money and those people are going to be a little more fun because they're like, dude, I'm making fucking money, bro.

You get him, motherfucker? Yeah, strict beer on the job. And then the mailroom was obviously like, also blue collar. I remember, like, this guy was, like, reading about Elliot Page. And he's like, oh, God damn it. I have to eat and read about Elliot Page. It's like, you're, you pulled up the article. You fell for the click page.

No, no, no, I can't eat it. What, fucking Mr. Potato Head's trans? I'm going to bed. Yeah, yeah, this is too much for me. That's shangulous. Yeah. Can't steal his stuff. But, um, dude, it's the fucking, like,

but I will take that over. I hate to sound like, I'm like, you know, I'm kind of a blue collar cat again. Right. You know, but it is like, it's like those people are normally more fun than like, but it's such an in between because then I have worked on like,

I don't know, it's like, I feel like there are real estate people I met that are like kind of like, let's fucking get shit done. Yeah. You know, it's like, all right.

I don't mind somebody who's just like, no, I'm here to work. I'm here to get my stuff. Like that I appreciate. Yeah. I just can't. I don't like the,

yeah, the people like how not funny like I've been I haven't had a job for two years before this job and I've been exclusively hanging out with comedians doing all of that like you kind of get used to that and then you go back to like work and you're like

oh most people are boring like they just don't have anything funny to say you can't anything that they like the things that people laugh at you're like what is happening right now oh yeah it's one guy let one pop and then he got like scolded because there's the gay guy was showing slideshows. And like half of them were him in drag, to be fair. And then he

had one with him and his mom. He goes, here's me, my mom. And this guy goes, which one's you? And I was like, yeah, that's fucking funny. People, like, couple people laugh at the back and they went, Jesus Christ, Frank. And, like, immediately he was like, it was a good one. I was like,

all right. I didn't. Can you move him next to my cubicle? So we have, like, Frank, and he's like, no, fucking. I've been working here for seven years What are you going to tell me that's not fucking funny? Tell me that's not funny I had that so like we don't

I work in an office like I work at all I work from home but we all have like we have sales meetings like conference calls or whatever and then we have a big group chat and like I haven't even said anything wild in there but like I've made jokes in there and then like I had like my mid-month review and my boss was like hey let's make sure we're keeping

the group chat like PG-13 I was like, what the fuck, dude? I'm like, okay, I guess I'm just not going to say anything, like, just to be on the safe side. Because, Jesus, it's... You're like, I get one fuck a week. Yeah, it's like really push the boundary. Yeah, I mean, technically, you're showing like half your nipple. You're like, no, it's covered PG-13, baby.

This is Baywatch right here, dude. People fucking Americans will be like, yeah, like Japanese culture is so, like, high context in terms of, like, how they interact in an office setting. Right. 10 minutes of pleasantries and then they'll get to the business and there's all these like specific ways to shake hands But on lunch break it's so octopus porn It's like, well, what the fuck

Offices are like just the same in their own way I think it's worse because at times it's ambiguous Yeah Because you have there are there isn't like We're a fun office But then you try to do something fun and they're like that You're fired You're like well what the fuck? Sorry I thought we were cool

Yeah it is a weird line Because it's also like But there I do know people that are like in business but they are like, they will say like whatever the, like, there are, there are people like that that are like way out there. Oh, yeah, there's like the Wolf of Wall Street guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, which is in every business. Sure.

Like, I remember when I was working at the company before, there's this guy who immediately, he's like this, like, deaf guy, I guess he, like escaped communism in Cuba or something like that. And he just comes in and he's like, get that fucking mask off your face. What are you fucking pussy? He's like, not around me. I lived in communism. Take that fucking mask off. And I'm like, all right.

And then he's like, every time I try to talk to, he's like, take your fucking mask off, okay? And then he's just like, you like Trump? I fucking love Trump. That guy's the man. And then I'm just like, I'm literally just like the receptionist. I'm like, yeah, all right, whatever you say, man. He's like, do you like guns? He said, I want to go fishing with me?

And this is like just like a day. He tipped me like $100. Yeah, that's pretty cool. But like, if you said anything slightly pussy or she'd fucking just rail into you. Dude, that's great. We need some of that, you know? You think I escaped communism for you to wear tight jeans to work today? I'm like, what does this have to do with anything?

It's in. The head of your penis looks like Fidel Castro. What the fuck? My grandmother was raped in an alleyway by, you know what, why did I have to take it? I didn't even know where that joke was going. And then I was like, I got a lot to follow if I started this way. I was like, I don't know. So you bailed out of it.

That's good. Immediately. Yeah, immediately. That's great. You're like, I'm wearing tight pants. Nope, not enough Do you guys This is a weird detour

Do you have a plan Like if you were homeless What you would do If you were homeless Sounds like things are going Pretty bad for you Really I was thinking

Like the past month I think of it all the time Get a haircut Get a haircut No I was making I would say that you were looking Yeah, shave your fucking mustache Stupid

I would do a police Barricade on McDougal Street Start charging people To come through it I would just take Barricade guys That's good one No I think what I would do

The guy who makes a lot of money He's the guy who lays in the street Says he's gonna kill himself People don't give him $20. Oh wow He does it He's been doing it for two years And I see people go to the ATM

Get money and then go pay him And then I saw him somebody give him 20 He said, please have 40 Come on, just 40, just 40 And then I'm like Just 40, dude Just a dollar is enough He does all around the city

Definitely makes the least More than me I assume you do that In one hour I saw him make like I think I think it was like $20 or $40 But like any

That's just him But not even a man hour. That's probably like 20 minutes. Dude, in one hour, I saw it, I saw it work one time. Well, that dude, that's 20 bucks an hour. That's great. That's 20 bucks for an hour at work? No taxes.

Yeah, all under the table. Yeah, and I'm sure he gets more. I'm sure he goes to Times Square, does that, makes more than that. Like, I'm sure in an hour, if you do it correctly, you can go on one street, do it, go on another street, do it, and like in an hour, you can make $50 easily. Do you ever, you ever, I'll get to that real quick? I probably suck dick for crackdown. What?

I have a bit of time. But, uh, obviously, like, especially because we're around the pair a lot, we're down in Greenwich Village, we see a lot of the same, like, 10, 15 homeless people. Yeah, yeah. You ever, but then are you ever, like, in the upper west side or in Brooklyn, and you see one of them? And you're like, what is happening? Like, you, like, I have to do a check. They're facey, bro. They're real.

They have, yeah, they, yeah, they'll get around down. Like, oh, that's right. You can take the train, too. Like, you're not just in this six block radius. Yeah, the guy's missing a leg. you don't normally see as far out. No, the wheelchair guys, those are generally in the same place. Some of them, though, I ask one of the, not to be, I hate, I hate when I catch myself

being a dick to a homeless guy to prove a point. And I'm like, who the fuck am I? Like, there's a homeless guy coming from money. I was like, hey, man, where's your wheelchair? I thought you had one yesterday. Did you? And I'm like, why am I? Who's winning here?

Yeah, nobody. I'm arguing with a homeless guy. I'm like, this is insane. Yeah. No, but I looked at, I, when we were doing park mics all last year, I would, on the way there or even in, like, specifically like Central Park, be like, like, oh, if I was homeless, I would, that's where I would stay. Like, that would probably be one of my go-to spots.

Yeah. Yeah, I get that. I think I'd go up to, like, any, like, NYU-ish-looking guy or a guy with, like, a goofy camera and just be like, you know, most people just look at me, but you see me. And you'd be like, here's $100. That's the fucking move that you all the time. Do you want to be an EP?

Can I take a picture of your hands? Yeah. You could, I think if you were, like, a marginalized group, that's where you can really make. money. I've heard a lot of... Have you, I've seen a black kids come up with and you're like, oh, you just think I'm an Edward, don't you? And then I'm like, no, I don't. But like a lot of people, I guarantee would fall for that immediately.

Dude, I was in the Mint Masala, the Indian place right next to the pair. And this guy, you know the guy, the homeless guy with the weird eye comes around the pair of line? Yeah, you could see the future in it. It's like a crystal ball. Yeah, he's my least favorite because I hate his eye. It's disgusting to look at.

He should get it fixed out of him. But he came in, like, he came in to mint masala. And I was like asking from, and I was like, oh, this is on another level. Oh, yeah, yeah. And then he, I was just like, he was like, hey, I was with Brandon Berea. And he was like, hey, do you guys have any money? And I was like, no, man, sorry. And then he was just like, that's all you fucking white people ever say is sorry.

All you ever say is. I'm like, what do you want me to say? Fuck off. Like, well, I was trying to be nice to you, dude. I told the guy I was racist one time because he's like, oh, I guess your racist is like, absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah.

That's going to berating me. Being, asking nicely didn't work. so, oh, I bet if I yell at this guy, that's going to work. I mean, I respect the range of techniques, because if one thing doesn't work, maybe the other will. It's better than him trying to be nicer and nicer. He's pivoting, yeah. He's trying to figure it out.

I don't think it's a horrible idea. Yeah, I don't know. I see a lot of interesting ones. I think, yeah, I don't know. There's definitely get yourself a wheelchair. Listen, if you're listening to your homeless, get yourself a wheelchair immediately. Speaking of wheelchair, is the guy who yells

and just has like child porn is bad written on his shirt. Like, do you know that guy? The old white guy who's like, that guy. Is he on his high horse? I agree. Yes. I mean, it's bad, yes.

Is he homeless or is he just a weird guy? I'll see him around. Like, he's probably not doing great. Sure. But he's, what did you just saw one of those guys in your office? He's like, Cape guy.

You're like, wait, what? He's like, yeah, just do that on Thursdays, man. Like, that's just my out of town. You have open mics? I have. I've seen that guy all over the hat. Oh, yeah. I see him all over the place. Oh, yeah.

He, yeah, he, like, he has something where you're, like, supposed to call the president or something? Something, yeah. Yeah. He has a different, every time I see him, he has a new Haynes white t-shirt that he's written in Sharpie on. Something's fun on, yeah. And it's, like, a different cause. Yeah. Or something.

He's, like, trying to do a message or whatever, but then- I know one guy's number I was going to have to do the podcast. I mean, everybody's had a homeless guy on their, like, podcast. Of course, I have. Yeah. I have not. No, but I mean, it's like a Howard Sterney kind of thing to do to have a homeless guy. But there's one guy I really do want to get on because he seemed, I mean, he'll randomly

yell at me, but like when he's coherent, he's great. He's great, yeah. Yeah. Would you have him call in? Uh, no, he gave me his mom's phone number. He's like, yeah, you can just, I'd just do it in the park, just grab the, Oh, okay. Gotcha.

Batteries, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just assuming he's not going to steal my equipment and I'd never see him again. Right. Well, apparently he's on the K2. I didn't know the homeless guys are still smoking that because you can get at smoke shops. People would just smoke K2. I'm white and Christian. What does that mean?

K2, it's like spice. It's like synthetic marijuana. Gotcha, got you, got you out of here, got you. I was like, I'm dumb. It was like a drug that was very popular in middle school, and I thought that they would have outlawed it by now because of the amount of children that have died doing it. But now it's just like...

What does it do? So it's marketed as weed, like synthetic marijuana. They take these chemicals and they spray it down with like... They take like fake leaves and they spray it down with chemicals and it's supposed to be incense for you to burn. But you smoke it and you get, like, fucked it. It's supposed to mimic marijuana, but it's, like, really bad for you. It burns your throat.

Oh, God. Feels terrifying and kind of awesome at the same time. I feel like that's a lot of drugs. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's like, you have seizures doing it. Oh, wow. I mean, I did a bunch when I was like, parents who drug test me. I'm like, all right, it looks like it's K2 time.

We're going to smoke this shit. That's legal. So, you know, every time. When I was a kid, I was like, come on. Yeah. I'm not a rule breaker whenever you were smoking K2. But it was, um, it was, um, What?

This is funny what you said. You're funny guy. What? I can't like my friends anymore? I need to get myself a fucking nicotine pen. I threw up. You sure? I can't do it.

Because I know that I'll use it too often. Same reason I don't use my, like I have a weed pen, but I... It's like you're drinking it. I know. I really... I will say that it tastes really good. This one tastes like nothing. Oh, man.

You had a fruity one the other night, and I was like, oh, I want him to come back. Ice blueberry. Wow. That was delicious. Something else, yeah. That was spicy. That is Thanksgiving. That's Thanksgiving.

But, yeah, it gets you all fucked up and weird. But it was like, I remember there's a school bias called Lake Highland. They started drug testing kids. So all the kids would just do K2. Apparently there was one kid. There was a, what's it called? A assembly where they're like, we drug testing. And no, that K2 will not show up on the drug test, but don't smoke.

It's something kid goes, yes! And apparently, like, the whole assembly could just hear him. Just like, yes. Yeah. So the kids were just smoked that. It was so funny seeing kids like take a bunch of coffee medicine. They're like, dude,

I'm not trying to get kicked off the football team, okay? And they're just like chugging. It was wild. People do so much research chemicals. There's like fake acid it was going around for a while. Jeez.

And it like, you trip for like, I think it's like, you trip for like 40 hours. Dude, they, what they say about Florida is true. Like, it's not like, Florida's punch. Yeah, because they fucking,

they do it all the time. Like, they can't help themselves. Yeah, that's a fun place. I like it. But it is one of those things that's like, if you like, that's the worst thing to do is drug test your kids, because they will just do different drugs.

Sure. There's no, it's like you think convicts are, like, it's not helpful. Yeah. At all. Yeah. Do teens in Florida watch that show, Euphoria?

And they're like, why are they all so mopey? Yeah. That's what I heard about kids going to raves and stuff. And they're all like, I'm depressed. Yeah. Yeah. I've heard it.

That's one of those shows where I'm just like, nah. I haven't seen a while. You got to make a comedy about raves, dude. If you're doing raves, I've written like a screenplay about it's funny shit. It's a hilarious environment. It's like people dressed up in crazy costumes on so much drugs.

Yeah. People dressed up in crazy costumes on the weirdest place. insomnia, which I'm not like over, but... Are we taking Ambien? Yeah, I've taken Ambien. Dude, nuts. I took one a week ago. We'll talk about that a second. Yeah, yeah.

Amy doesn't knock me up, but anyway. I was like, at my girlfriend's house, I couldn't sleep, so I just went out. I was like watching movies all day. And then at like 6 a.m. I started watching Project X. And she came out of a room at like 645, and she was like, what the fuck are you watching?

Please turn that down. And then you looked at her and you were like, To the break of time. We're going to throw the biggest fucking party. Dude, that was like, that was the worst influence on high schoolers that movie. Oh, yeah. I was like, they went through the biggest bang. I came out when I was in eighth grade and everyone was like, this is what high school is going to be like.

So that would have been, so what year was that would that have been? Because I saw it in high school, but I can't remember what year I was. 2013, probably. I graduated high school. No, it had to be sooner than that. I graduated high school 2016. I guarantee it came out in 2012. I was in 2012.

I was in 2013. I came out 2012. Yeah. Okay. So that was that, that would make sense. Like, if I was like, it was like, I was. I was a senior in high school then. Yeah. Fuck, I'm that much older than you.

I don't like that. I went to some, no project X-parts, but everybody would say like this is like Project C or something like that because it's Carl's party. Right, right. And they just get shut down pretty fast.

Some of them didn't, gay to communities could kind of go for a while because like, the cops couldn't relate. The guy, the good gay would be like, no, all the people they know really over here. Right.

There's another movie called Project X they've never watched, but the poster for it is just a guy with an orangutan and they're like, that's the one I want. Yeah, that sounds fucking awesome. It seems like a great movie. Just heartwarming.

For fucking Ambien. I've done Ambien. I've taken it. Have you had like the crazy experiences on it? Oh yeah. It didn't knock me out. Dude, if you fight it, like I didn't try to fight it. I just like have a hard time sleeping.

So I took it like a week ago. And you're, so first time I took it, I was like stumbling around and like you very hard. You genuinely like stumble when you walk. It really fucks you up. Yeah. Dude. And you like, you're in this weird.

Like you're almost tripping. You're this weird in between. Like we're not asleep. And like. I was like, I felt like I was like a worm for a little bit. And I felt like I was different things. I felt like I was like boogers in my own throat. And it's like very like crazy.

Like it was like, I felt like I was like genuinely. And I was like, because you're alert, but you're like dreaming almost. Like you're not asleep, but it's like, are you hallucinating? It just like turns off a part of your brain. Yeah. It doesn't put you to sleep. It just like makes part of you unconscious. So like I, when I took it, like, I went to this psychiatrist when I was young

who just, he would just give me drugs. Yeah, that's not like the one I have now. Yeah, because he had like, like, pens on his desk from, like, every pharmaceutical company. It's just like, okay. Oh, we both know what's going on. This guy has been railroaded. It's just something like a hot chick with pig tits was like,

give kids Xanax. Yeah, yeah. I love what people don't understand that that's like a thing that totally, I've had that happen. Dude, I got put on an arrow and it's like fucking like three. Oh, yeah. Probably like seven. It's like that definitely happens.

Oh, yeah. They're in so clearly. literally in bed together. That's the funniest people are like, it's a doctor. Yeah. Doctor is telling you. I was like, yeah, you mean like Dr. Larry Nassar? It's like, just because you're a doctor doesn't mean you're like... Yeah, you mean people who also want money. Yeah, right. Yeah, exactly. Okay, when I, he gave me Ambien, and I took it one night, and I, it didn't kick him when I thought it would. So I, like, got up out of bed to go and, like, get water. And I was walking down the stairs,

and I just, like, just blacked out. And I came to, and I was, like, in my basement. And there was, like, a keyboard down there. And I was just banging on the keys. I was going like, oh, it, why don't it? I was like... It was like, our son's possessed. I had no idea how long I've been out. I was just doing, like, doing that.

And then I was, like, awake, but I was, like, not in control of what was happening. Oh, wow. That would freak me out. Somebody, one of our friends about I say his name, he sent me a picture of guy sucking his own dick. And that's what I woke up to on Ampian, and I was just like, what the fuck am I looking at? I saw the picture you took of yourself.

I think you responded that. Yeah, at FaceTime, I'm all damn I'm all damn, I'm fucked up. Yeah, damn, no, I haven't ever done that. That'd be funny if every time you took Ambien, you came to and you were trying to suck your own time. Come on! One of these times!

Yeah, that, yeah, it's a, it's recommended. Drink with it, do drugs. I'm just kidding, never do that. No, that's the worst thing you could do. Yeah, that's how you literally die. That's Malaney's joke about like, he's like, have you ever, like, sometimes you black out and you wake up with no money.

Sometimes I would black out and wake up with more money. That's a much worse scenario. Oh, 100%. Where he's just like, goods and or services were exchanged. They were like, how did you do that? And he's like, well,

have you ever mixed dackeries with Ambien? Yeah. Did that work? It didn't not work. Dacquery's an ambient. That's insane. Like, I completely forgive Rosanna after that. I'm like, I've said this 100 times.

Like, dude, you were so, like, fucked up. Like, you're not there at all. That's when she was tweeting. all that crazy shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. She seems fine. I have no problem.

Yeah, I don't give a shit. No. But yeah, that's, yeah, it's wild. Like, I remember, like, I... I love Joe Rogan's defense, like, initially. When he saw the tweet, he was like, but she does. What? Oh, yeah.

Well, to be fair, that woman looks white as shit. So, like, you can easily call a white person a monkey. Like, there's nothing racist about that. I've never, like, looked in any of it. Dude, this person, you would be like, that is a white person. You'd have no idea. All right.

But little to your luck that... Yeah, I'll just let you incriminate yourself. Yeah, I do. 100%. Bummer. Yeah, that's one of those... I don't know. I mean, granted, that happened, like, what,

a couple years ago now? Yeah, at least two. Yeah, yeah. Anytime I see stuff like that, that's just like, so-and-so said that... I'm like, I don't... It's probably not, and I don't care. Even if they did, I don't give a fuck.

It's like, I don't think she would knowingly tweet that this black person's from the planet of the apes. Yeah, I don't think... But also, she's Rosanne. She's crazy as fuck, so maybe. The worst thing that happened to her was losing her show. That's terrible. But then the people, mostly that were, like, canceling her online

were people that had no idea who she was in the first place. Yeah, absolutely. I've never seen, like, the original Roseanne. No. Yeah, yeah. And I just don't give a fuck. Yeah, yeah. I can't imagine actually caring about stuff like that.

Yeah. Like, it doesn't matter. Anything with Chappelle, anything, nothing, nothing. It's just like, why are you so upset about? Like, there's so many more things that you could be putting your energy. Not that I'm going to put my energy towards. Yeah, I'm the same way I'm like, Listen, let's stop complaining about Kansas culture and let's get started.

I mention it 40 times in my podcast every week. I don't give a fuck. Yeah, dude, the fucking three weeks of everyone talking about Chappelle's special, I was like, we just fucking shut the fuck. Yeah, oh, I'm sorry. It's not even like that funny of a special. No, and aren't people still dying in Afghanistan? Why aren't we fucking talking about that shit?

Yeah, but also like, okay. That's everything, though. It's like, kids are starving in Africa, so we're really going to make an argument. Like, you could be there for any argument. I guess my girlfriend could be like, seriously, you're not going to take the trash out. I'm like, we're talking about trash right now. That's an easy to, I feel like, I'm not putting you out of the bus,

because I do the same thing where I'm like, are we really going to do this while this is going on? It's like, I guess it's fine when, I don't get, I guess I can understand that like with people, like, if you, in conversation or in a relationship or whatever, but like when a major news organization is 100% ignoring, not covering important shit and focusing on, like, pop culture, it's like, what are you doing?

Like, how is this something? Yeah, yeah. I don't understand how this. People listen to this podcast and CNN. Yeah, absolutely. That's how we're going to end up on Rogan the other day. Dude, that's, man, I could just suck his cock, man. If I could just blow him under the table, he's lifting weights, dude.

Yeah, dude, I heard this crazy story that he actually got blown by his sister at a work party. I was trying to bring it back. I started that sentence and I was like, oh, I don't know if this is, I don't know if I've 100% got it. And I didn't stick a landing. I didn't have it. This was been the most bailing podcast. Yeah, I tried. I went for it, but I lost me.

I got something. You ever been in a bar, and you've seen a sign in the bar that says, it's like if you feel uncomfortable or like another patron is threatening you, you can go up to any of our staff and ask. They'll try to fuck you. You just say, can I speak to Angela about the private event? Oh, yeah, yeah. And they'll, like, help you out.

Yeah. I've heard of things like that. Yeah. It's like a good thing, but it's like you shouldn't put a sign in the bar. Yeah, I get that guy's like, wait, hey, hey. Have you seen the one where, have you seen the sign in bars where it's just like a Jimmy? Tell my, then that just, like, if you order the Jimmy, that's just like, if my wife calls, tell her I'm not here. Or like, if you order the Stevenson.

Oh, it's just like, I don't know. I'd love to go to a bar for the first time. You're like, give me the Jimmy. Who the fuck are you? No wedding ring on? Like, wait, what? You don't know. who's this guy?

This guy's from out of town. But yeah, that is, that's a good service that people have. You're in, like, a gay bar. They're like, does your wife even know you're here? How would she know that she's here? Isn't your whole destination is secret tonight? Right. One of my buddies is banned from a bar right now

because he got like a pretty big bar fight. And I guess he went in on Halloween because he dressed up as like Kid Rock or something like that and he's like his favorite bar. So like he, all the staff knows him. And I guess he got kicked out the other night. And apparently it's like the night before Thanksgiving. like, please, this is literally my favorite bar

in the whole entire world. Like, please just don't kick me out. Wow. But, uh, just a genuinely sad moment. Yeah, it's funny when you're banned for life from a place because it's like, it's a weird, like, have you been banned from life for life from places? No, no, no, no. Um, not yet.

I like, I like the idea of getting banned for places I don't want to go to. It's kind of fun to be like, I was, like, I friends got banned from Universal for like a couple years. Nice. Wow. Yeah. I would, I'm sure your buddy's a cool guy and stuff and I'm sure he's fun to be around. He's got his own life. You don't know him.

I'm just saying this. before I'd just be mean to him. But like, if I was at a bar, no matter what the night was, if there was a guy in the bar who was yelling at the stabs, he's like, please don't kick me out. This is my favorite place on earth. It would be the biggest, like,

buzzkill for like hanging out, having fun at a bar and a guy's like, please, I fucking love it here. There's nowhere else that loves me like this. When you're here, your family. That's what they said. Oh, that'll be fun. Get banned from Olive Garden, dude.

That's a place. where I would, yeah. And that's also, that's fun because it's just like, what could you have done? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, it's not a... Imagine you get banned from every Olive Garden, like every franchise knows.

You're on the iPad. You know how they have a little iPad thing on the table? Yeah. I just picture of you on there. The wall of like shoplifter or like dining dashers. Oh shit. I still got to go to Margaritaville in Times Square. That's the type of shit I love.

I love shit like that. I want to go to the Hofbrough house in Midtown. Oh, I've been to that. Is it fun? Yeah, it's great. Yeah, it's great. Yeah. The German place, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's good. They didn't let Jason David in, though, which is kind of weird, but... Surprise, they were like, yes, come in. Come in. Let's give them a tour of the kitchen. The kitchen is downstairs, actually. The kitchen is out back? The kitchen is in Germany.

What do they say about... That's not as bad. You should hear me impersonating Jason. I just do the most over-the-top Jewish voice. It's just fun to be, he'd be like, hey, man, how's it going? I'm Jason David. How's it going?

It's just like not any way what he sounds like at all. That sounds like what I imagine Jake's 93-year-old grandpa. It's fucking, the hot seas in America today. Their whole MO is to trick Jews into coming back to Germany

with them. We have Z. All expense paid vacation. Don't they like not like own the hog? I know he wouldn't own it. But like, you like, no, come on. Come on.

Bro. We own an NFT on every Holocaust photo. I know, but like they say like, I've heard they're like, yeah, we don't really talk about it much. I don't know, but... Interesting. Germans? Yeah. No, they talk about it like a lot. Oh, really?

They like make sure that everyone knows about it so that it won't happen again. Like, they teach it in schools like, we made this huge mistake. And we have to know everything about it and what led to it so we don't let it happen again. Okay, I think one guy told me they don't. And I was like, yeah. Not to make it like super... People in America are like, we have... We should do that with a slavery because we just don't.

We just say, yeah, it happened. And it's all better now. I don't know. I think we're pretty good about it compared to other places. I think it depends where you go because everybody has a different experience about it. Like, I remember us learning about it in high school. And I'll always talk about this, but the best was that video we saw. I mentioned seven times in the podcast, but it was like actors reading, like, old documents.

And they had a white guy read the slave one. But you didn't know at first. It's just like, it's been a long day. And then they cut to like just this white actor like reading it because he's like a famous actor. They're like, oh, it's great. It's Robert De Niro. It was like somebody like that. Wow.

And I can't find the video. It was the funniest thing. I remember me and my buddy were dying laughing. And our teacher was like, you think slavery is funny? We're like, no, but this is the most insane thing. This is crazy. No, but this is pretty fucking funny.

It's called, uh, America, the story of us. It's on the history channel. I haven't been able to find the clip, but I only have 30 listeners. They're not going to find it for me. But I can't find it anywhere.

But I remember you should be in the funniest thing on the planet because I'm like, this is insane. Yeah, that, I don't know. It is weird to South, though, because there are people that, like, have a narrative of that. They're like, no, they were, like, treated, like, well. There's so many people that are like, it's blown way out of proportion. You're like, all right.

Well, I don't even care. My ancestors have passed down the idea that they weren't that mean to them. Right. So, yeah, that's it. You still owned another person. Like, I don't care if you treated them the best. Like, you still owned another person. Like, that's not.

Yeah. But I also, like, I'm both sides of, that sounds weird. I'm not going to brag about how I'm not going to be like Yeah well guess what Benjamin Franklin fuck him Froning slaves because I also didn't live back then I can't brag about being a good guy

And totally hypotheticals here I'm not gonna be like oh he was a great guy And like defend why he I'll defend why the cool shit he did I'll think he's cool because this And I'm also gonna be like But I'm not gonna be like oh yeah Well he actually was a good slave

You know me it's like either way But then there's that annoying side of it too Where you're like he's a fucking piece of garbage And I would never do that It's like no idea You're a dumb person. Because, honest, like, if you lived in Germany in the 20s and 30s, you would have been a Nazi. You'd have been the one guy you're like, nope, not today.

Yeah. I wouldn't have been the guy that said no to Nazi Germany. No, no, you fucking wouldn't. 99% of people would have been Nazis. Like, it's insane. That's so true to think about, yeah. But also, it's been people fucking talk about, like, Thanksgiving or Columbus Day like that. Like, we shouldn't celebrate these for these reads.

Like, no one on Thanksgiving is, like, dressing up like a fucking person. Yeah, you fucking tool bag. Yeah. You're not, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, like, you're not, it's just a day off. Yeah. Can't have be so stupid. Chill, dude.

I don't do that. Columbus Day, too, is like, the only people I care are, like, people in Newark. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a fuck about Columbus. Yeah. Yeah, I don't care either way. But, um, are we talking about Nazi Germany or something? But I think somebody was talking about it, in general, the European culture is, like,

more, because they had kings and shit like that. They are, it's like, we wouldn't necessarily know if somebody R-age went there and would have done it because we've grown up in this culture, but it is a culture of, like, kings and listening to, like, one leader constantly. So it is one of those things like, they are more likely to fall into positions like that just because of the way things are said.

Sure, and we aren't because we're a nation of rebels. We're a fucking... Fucking gear, man. Hey, you guys, speak into this. You guys want to join my militia? Yeah. But yeah, for real. Like, that's just...

There's a nation of fucking runaways, criminals, and rebels, dude. Like, we don't... We don't take shit. Which is crazy. I don't know. I think it is weird. did you see that I barely know about this. I saw three headlines didn't actually read an article.

But like I guess there was something that the EU is trying to like reverse. There's something called like the Nuremberg law or something, which has to, had to come out of World War II, Nuremberg trials, etc. Where and but it's basically they're not using it anymore or they're trying to get it revoked so that they can mandate vaccinations across all of. Yeah, that is wild. And it's just like, what? Yeah, yeah, you're like, come on.

Yeah, that is kind of crazy. How do you not, like, I got the vaccine. I'm all in. Let's move everybody. Be, okay, that's fine. But, like, can we agree that there's at some point where it's like, hey, maybe we should start not thinking about, like, I don't know. There's something where it's like, hey, this is a rule that we put in to stop the Nazis.

Maybe we should fucking keep that. Let's keep that one there, you know. I don't know. Yeah, I'm going to go either way with it. I'm either going to not get the booster or I'm going to get it and then just be like, Like, I, whatever. I love how there's like a million different ways. I'm like, it's like, it's not that black and white, but in my mind, I'm like, I'm either

going to get it. Yeah. And then just get everyone after that forever for the rest of my life. Yeah. Or I'm just going to, I don't know, not do it. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know how I feel.

I think it's. Did you get, you got the booster, right? No? No, I don't know. Maybe step out. There's some. It's come. My date is coming up, though.

Your anniversary? My booster date, yeah. Oh, there's a specific date. It's like, yeah, six months after. Oh, I think mine's probably passed then, but I don't know. I haven't looked into anything at all. I just know that I don't know. Yeah, I don't know anything going to.

And I don't think anybody else does either. Yeah, yeah. Like, I am just going to start looking up anti-VAC scientists. Just starting naming them off. Just so the other person would be like, who are your pro-VAC scientists? Right. Just to start a dumb argument because, like, I am, I do think you should get it. Sure.

But, like, just have the other side of it and be like, here's, you know, Gregory Waltherson, went to Yale. and type X. Name me a Vax guy. We'll play cards. Right. Yeah, I don't know. I think you should get it,

but then also, like, I don't know if you should necessarily be forced to get it. Yeah. You should be forced to have sex with Matt, though. Yeah. Please. Anytime.

Well, you guys think about Toblasio making that, like, the heroin haven thing. What's that? Sounds sick. I'm on board. It's like one of those, they do it in other countries.

It's like one of those places where if you're a heroin addict, you can go and get 100%. Clean needles. Yeah. Yeah. supervise like

when you shoot up they watch it yes but they also are going to sneak vaccines in there just giving them all vaccines yeah I think that's I think that's interesting I agree 100%

I'm full on like I genuinely think that every drug should be completely legal so that it can be regulated yeah that's the only political view I really have like the only thing I genuinely care about I think it would fix a bunch of

I don't know anything about politics I'm fucking an idiot but sure I think that yeah like way less people die on fent all. It's like, yeah, there's like a million reasons. It's not just that. It's like also like you would create a bunch of businesses. Yeah, I think you'd have a spike in people doing drugs, but also like it's your fucking decision. I don't know. I wouldn't start doing that. I think it would be interesting to see the effect that it would have on like organized crime. Yeah, yeah, because

that's like that's literally where it started. Yeah. I mean, I just fucking finished watching Narcos Mexico. It's just like that's what the whole thing is. Just moving Coke. And it would, I think, changed the immigration situation because like we are, I mean, every time I bought Coke, in a way I was fueling the Mexican drug cartel. Sure. Wasn't I? Yeah. In theory.

So it's like if I stopped buying it from them, in theory, they would have less money. And if millions of people did that, like, we're like one of like the biggest Coke users in the world. Absolutely. And we have the number one place on our southern border. Yeah. So I'm like, I'm like, I think, okay, talk about gang violence, all of that, I think would slow down a bunch because there's no longer people selling coke. I mean, a lot of people wouldn't have jobs, but I mean, get a real job. get a real.

So Coke at a Coke at a store. But that's my favorite people are like, oh, what are you just going to be able to get like, you know, Coke at CVS? It's like you can't get cigarettes

at CVS because it's a bad look. Yeah. But you can already get fucking methamphetamine hydroxide, which is literally methamphetamine but in a pill form. So it's like,

which is better for you than smoking street crystal meth. Sure. Yeah, that's. Yeah, I got a lot of pins. I don't mind that. I don't mind that. I don't, I don't mind that.

But I don't like the, I feel like I hear more about it in like California. where they, like, there's almost just like a, oh, he's, he has a mental handicap. So, like, he's allowed to, like, there's almost like a thing where it's just like people that are homeless or whatever are committing crimes. And they're just like, no, but they're homeless and down on their luck.

And we need to care for them. It's like, no, they're also disrupting society and fucking attacking people. But I like the way you started that, though, because you're like, look at he's mentally handicapped. So he gets a pass. It sounds like you got like cut in line at like subway or something. You're like, oh, yeah, okay, we're just going to let them do whatever they want. Where it's just like, oh, this guy's got mental health.

It's like, okay, but he also set someone's car on fire. Like, that's a problem. Like, I don't know. Yeah, well, that is the thing is they do get kicked out of me. Like, there's a guy who assaulted, like, a barricade guy assaulted somebody at Cafe Reggie. Two hours later, he was just out. Yeah, exactly. But I'm also like, I don't know what they're supposed to do.

This is always, there's going to be a portion of any group that's, like, erratic like that. Sure. You know, that just doesn't play by the rules, essentially, and they're just like. Kind of like us. Yeah. That guy, the guy you're describing. Cafe Reggio Salkai is like the Joker. Yeah, yeah. He just is

a fucking bald. Well, he also has a reason, though. He says he blocks the street so people can have fun. So he has a he has a reason for what he does. Did I tell you show me like the back of a... He's like, they let me out of jail with this. He's like, this is... I got his pass and they let you out of jail with it. And it just said why he was arrested. It was like a piece of paper

printed out. It was like his write-up and he's like, get one of these, you walk right out. And then he was talking to... He's like, you know, you look at the back of your social security. It's a piece of paper that he wrote on Kran. He's like murdered the police. I do feel bad we got to end it there. That's fine. What do you guys want to promote?

I don't know if I have anything. My podcast, I'm working on, we've been off for a month, so I'm trying to bring that back, but that's it. I don't have anything. Yeah, I'm good. Come to my show on Sunday. Oh, yeah. Sunday 6. Yeah. Peanut Butter trap at the Grisley Bear Comedy Club, all right. Yeah. Oh yeah, guys. Thank you for listening. Bye.

I appreciate a lot. Thank you so much.