Morning Good - Activist Comedian Pivot - Episode 326

Episode Date: August 17, 2026

Jess Levin and Levi White return to the show for today's episode. They talk about backstage at Madison Square Garden, the best and worst comedy fans, and getting scammed in Dubai. Thanks to Jess and Levi for coming back on the show. Check them both out on previous episodes and hit their links down below for more. Thanks as well to everyone who watched Michael Good on Kill Tony LIVE From Madison Square Garden 2026. If you haven't yet, you can stream the replay at killtonylive.comJess Levin is on Instagram @jlevcomedy. Levi White is on Instagram as well @levithewhite, and they both co-host the podcast "You Pick The Movie" available everywhere now. As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michaelgoodcomedy and on Twitter @agoodmichael. Check out the show on YouTube and follow the official Instagram page @morninggoodpodcast.

Thanks for the F Shack. I love dirty mic and the boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They called the podcast? Morning, very good. Oh, I love it.

Hey, welcome to the air. Thanks. Welcome to morning. All right. All right. We're here. Jess Levin. Yeah, sorry.

Let me put the phone away. Levi White. Stop. Post Arena. Post Arena. Yeah. When did it happen last week? Yeah.

So it happened Friday. And did you get blown? Did you get anything crazy? At least she's like, oh my God, Michael Good. No, because I'm a monogamous right now. Wait a minute. When did that happen again? The Irish girl.

Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, she's great. Yeah. But that was really funny mentally going on it. And I'm like, oh, man, it's going to be a huge mess. I'm going to be like, no, no, pussy. I know it.

And it was just like. Sorry, lady. Sorry. You're here like, Tilelli, I'm taking. Yeah. And then it's just me being like, did you see Tony go back there? Yeah. Because I just want to, you know, thank him.

Like, it's just such a different. Oh, my God, dude. How was that all situation? Oh, it was great. Like, all that was great. It's the, so it went very well. So it went really well. Interview went great.

We saw it. You did great. I didn't see the interview. I only saw your clips. Yeah. Because I didn't watch it. Yeah, of course. There we go.

Sorry. No worries. But it's so funny because, like, the first day, because I'm only on one night, you know, I get this all-access bed. You're walking around the whole arena and you're, like, showing people your thing. I know, you're the garden, bro. You're in the fucking garden, dude. Yeah.

You're everybody shooting their pants. Like, there's people that I thought were mean. And I think I literally texted somebody like, so-and-so's got a real ego. And then text things later, they're like, hey, sorry, I was just really nervous right now. Oh, my God. I'm so. I get it, though, because I, we do the same shit. You know what I mean?

Like, with other comics, they're like, what a dick? And then later on, you're like, oh. Yeah. They were just, you know, in the zone or some shit. because, like, you know, you're kind of mingling a little bit. You know, this guy's taking me up to, like, the balcony, so you're looking from the farthest point of view with the whole thing. You're like, this is nuts.

And then, you know, the show starts, and they are just booing, like, crazy. Because, like, people laugh, like, a little bit louder than their actual voice. But people boo with the top of their lungs. So the booze are caring in, like, the fucking most absurd way where you're like... Yeah, but are they, like, do they even care... Like, when you walk on, they just immediately boo? Or do they, like, kind of, like, give you a shot? Are they all just retarded?

They, a lot of them were this chick went up and just got complete, the first pocketbook got completely booed by the whole arena. Oh my God. Was she bad though? I couldn't hear a word because I was like, I was like about to go on. I was like, all right, don't shoot your pants. Yeah, she stunk. Did she just see it?

I don't know. Oh. Well, she ruled because then she did the after food. She gave him the finger? What's up? Oh, she went to the after party? She was out of party. Because I was like, at the after party, I'm like, am I allowed here?

And my friend who's like a golden ticket winner. He's like, yeah, you're fucking, you just did the guard. you gotta pass it. You can go to the after party. Yeah. Don't fucking do that to yourself. No, of course. But in your head, you're just like, you're good.

I hear you. Yeah, but like, come on. But fuck yeah for her being like, I got boot by her. I'm going to the after party. Yeah. I was like, I respect the fuck out of that. Like, yeah, go to the after party. It's the after party.

It pulled your, oh, it was in the stand. Oh, okay, of course. How was that? It was great. Well, the funniest is like, you get off stage and, you know, it's like Jim Norton's on panel and we're making all these jokes, trans jokes and stuff. And you're like, that's fun. his wife's trans,

Adam Ray's Jewish. Yeah. And you go in the green... I didn't know I didn't know that. And you can agree. You do that? Yeah.

How is this, is this known knowledge? It's hard when he's disguised every other day. You have no idea what he is. Yeah, I'm not I'm attracted to him. He's a handsome guy.

I never knew a Jewish guy can look like that, man. Yeah. Science would allow you to be that handsome. He's one attractive dude. I thought he was Italian. Yeah. You know, it's always one or the other.

You know what I mean? They're both Maybe he's mixed. Yeah. Yeah, he's got it. He's like Syrian. He's not Eastern European block. No.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Oh, yeah. He's not Sephardic. You know, he's one of them, olive ones. Yes, he's got that. He's got that olive. Yeah.

That tan. I like the tan. Yeah. Tan. Hot guy. If you hear this. It seems like a very nice guy too. Cool as fuck.

Very funny. Very cool. Yeah. And it's like, but it's funny because I was saying like, Jim Noron's married to a trans woman. Yeah. He's Jewish. Also very nice guy. super cool and you go to the green room

and totally severely disabled people and you're like I guess this is the Nazi comedy show you're like I don't know it's this is what people call it like if Adolf Hitler saw this I don't think he'd be like this is what I want it's like not at all like I don't think he's smart enough to be a fascist

I don't know what fascist I thought you have to have a uniform to be a fascist anybody like a libertarian whatever the fuck you want to call those idiots I don't um yeah the whole like why are people giving you shit at all for Kill Tony? No, I mean, I got it. You just see stuff online and then you, I got a little shit where some guy, I don't even care if I'm talking, I'll talk shit on this hard. This one guy was like,

wait, who's this guy? Is this a normie? Nobody? No, he's a comic, but you probably know the story. I was talking about it before. The guy, we're drunk at a party and he's just like, you know, Tony's a fascist. If I went on stage and then he starts being like, you know, just, just, Oh, I know what you're talking about the fucking July 4th party. Yes. Yes. The guy is like, it's so funny to hear him go, because I start digging it in because I start being like, he's like, just know that you're performing at a fashion. This comedy show. And I was like, I was like, I'd perform

in front of the Cool Club's Client. Like I started, and then the girl I'm like, do not do this. I'm like, you give me a microphone. I'll fucking talk about it. They're paying. Yeah, they're paying. I can say whatever I want and they're not going to be like,

you know, that would be an experience of like whatever. And then he's like, if I went on stage, I would do my set, kill, look at Tony, say you're a fascist piece of shit and then get off stage. And then later that night, the guy apologizes, buys me a beer. Oh, that's great. The next day he calls my friend whose party was and goes,

I don't know why you associate with that guy You think you have the balls And Madison Square Garden Does they have to hand What you can't even say it to me? And you just thought it was hilarious Like I was not like offended by it I'm just over everyone

Either being a warrior or being like a four Like it's like I don't care Like I'm happy for you You gotta understand Use it You use it I'm happy for you Am I like

But like I don't know these people I don't give a fuck I don't care I'm just happy for my friends That's all I was doing for you It's cheering for you And I appreciate that. And it has changed because I'm not a millionaire overnight.

So now I'm absolutely shifting. And now I am going to be an activist comic. Okay, good for you. That's a good way. You're going to dye your hair and stuff, blue, purple and stuff. Yeah, but that's kind of on the way out. Yeah, but the thing is if one route doesn't work, you've got to immediately shit on that route. Oh, right on.

So you've got to go that one. And then finally you'll merge into the two and have like your fucking Biden going around doing talks. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like Biden's kid now is like, what's his name? The Crackhead? Hunter. He's like killing him.

right now. Oh, yeah. He's killing it. He did a podcast with, I want to see it. It's so bad. Jake Marmerite thought it was AI because there's no way Hunter Biden sat down with Matt McCusker playing the flute and Duncan Trussell. And then you're like, this is a real thing. Hunter's like, I'd smoke crack out of something that looks like this. And you're like, yeah, this is too good. This is so good. Him and... Fuck Spider-Man. I want to see you. Ben and Shapiro and him sat down with the Channel 5 guy who I like a lot. Oh, you mean Nick Fuentes.

Oh, Nick Fuentes. There's the opposite of Ben Shapiro. Yeah, Nick Fuentes. I just get them all confused. Nick Fuentes, and it was, like, really intriguing. I was like, this is like, I mean, Nick Fuentes is so fucking. These people, this is the only thing annoys me about these people. I just want to be like, dude, you realize you're a fucking nerd, right? Like, you are a nerd?

Right. That's the only thing. It's like, I just want you to know, like, you're not a man. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I just don't. I think Ben Shapiro would say he's a nerd. He would say he's a nerd? Yeah.

Do you think Nick Fuentes says he's a nerd? I don't know. No, I think he thinks he's, but I'm like, you've never put your dick. in a man's mouth or a woman's vagina. He's always said, he's just kind of like, if you fuck a woman, you're gay. Yeah, yeah.

I was just like, what do you? This is his troll shit? Is this troll shit? But I just don't know what's real and not real. Like, what are you as a person? Like, I just don't understand how you exist. Do you what I mean? Yeah, because he flip-flops, doesn't he?

Not dramatic. No, he hates Trump now. Oh, Jews he does. Yeah. I mean, do you blame. But. I guess that's why he hates Trump. Well, yeah, he hates Trump because of the whole, like, you know,

he doesn't like. It's made weird a lines. It's like Tucker Carlson. Doug Carlson's not like for it. But he's just like, why are you using the money? I thought we were going to just take all the money back and no one's getting it, you know? Yeah. But now it's like, whatever.

Now Jews are confusing for me now that I'm an activist comic. Yeah, I know. A couple years ago would have been pro-June. Now I got to figure out where about people are. Well, you got to start. We'll hang out a long. No, I'm talking about. No.

It's not, you'd have to like, you don't have to do anything. But what you could do is, you know, you can really flip the script. You do purple hair and you do. do all the activist thing, but you carry a mind comp with you. Oh, yeah, people were like, what is going on? What is going on? Like, it's like, what is this? Just research. That was a really, you know, a nuanced person.

That was a great. The funniest thing I saw on the whole show is, uh, what's his name? Uh, fucking, this is one of the funniest jokes I've heard of my life. It's such as like a little joke, but Timmy, no breaks. You know, I got punched the face by Matt McCusker's wife? He did? Yeah, they're doing a live podcast. I just saw him.

I like that guy. He's cool as fuck. And I saw him do a thing where he was like, I'm trying to be like he's not trying to do the Timmy No Break's thing, but he's like, he's struggling because he's like, everyone wants a Timmy No Briggs thing, and he's on stage talking about it. I'm like, you know what? Yeah, so I'm fucked. I'm here. This is me.

You know? I kind of like it. He's one of the nicest guys, and he's hilarious. So he got punched the face by her, because in character, he's saying all this racist stuff to Matt McCusker's wife at a live podcast. She punches him. He goes to MSG with blue hair and a fake black eye. And he's going, he's going, he's going, I've learned

the lot, you know, the black people, but reading up on this guy, Malcolm 10 great stuff. Malcolm 10. I was dying. For the next day. Oh my God, dude. That is so fucking funny.

It's hilarious. Yeah. And the whole thing's funny because like, you know, everything went well. Everybody's very cool. Great. The next day I got a brunch to my family. I thought my mom paid somebody because the waiter goes, hey, were you at MS. She last night?

And I was like, mom, did you set this up? And he was like, no, I was at the show. Great stuff. All this stuff. I was like, great. I go the next night. That's nice, dude. See that mom and dad?

Yeah. How about that, dad? Yeah. Because I know you and your dad's in. No, no, yeah. He was cool as fuck. It's supportive. And then the funniest was that night, because I didn't have an all-access pass, I had a guest pass.

Oh. So I go the next night. And I go late as fuck. I'm there at like 640. And I get a wristband and a Chinese fortune cookie piece of paper that says he's allowed backstage, basically. Oh, no way. Tell you what? You try to show that as a security guard, massive square garden.

They think you're a crazy person. So I show up and I'm like, I was on the stage last day. They go, okay, everybody wants to meet Tony Hinchcliffe, sir. Your seats are over here. And I go, no, it says right here. I go backstage. So I have to be like arguing with people.

And I just look like a crazy fan that's trying to get backstage. And they're like, sir. Yeah. And then a couple of people were like, dude, great job last night. Really great job. But yeah, your seats are over there.

I'm like, no, I'm allowed. So eventually I'm at the curtain to backstage. The show is about to start. And I don't want them to bother Tony Inchcliff about this. And I'm like, I'm allowed back there. and they're like, we can't, you can't go backstage. And eventually my friend has to drag me in there.

And then you're like, this is such a humbling experience from being like, right? The next night, just everybody's like, sir. Well,

that famous Sam Marell thing. You know what I mean? Like, right? He was on the tonight show. What's this one? He went to the bar. He was like,

or he went to some things. Yeah, no, dude, I'm fucking fading. Wait, what was the next thing? Yeah, well,

he did a tonight show or some shit. And then he went down to do a spot, like, down at a club or something. I don't know which one. And they're like, hey, can you go clean the urinal cakes? And he's like, I'm performing. They're like, she's like, I don't care.

He's like, I was on the tonight show last night. You know what I'm like? She's like, I don't care. It's like, you know, you're up and you're not. Right on right. It's just constantly like that. Yeah. Immediately.

And then I go to, uh, I buy a drink, because I go to the drink table where normally let you get drinks. Yeah. And they're like, are you performing tonight? They're like, this is only for people performing tonight. So I can't get a free drink or whatever. And I'm like, oh. And the other guy goes, just get him.

he goes he was here last night get him a drink I think guys arguing he's like was it coming out of your paycheck and like now I'm like backstage while the show's going you're creating a union fucking fucking home unit just because you wanted to go backstage to fucking which I get like but like like I don't know what do you do back there like we're hanging out the green room's great everybody's hanging out chilling like talking you know you're kind of like when you say everybody like who people on the show people not on the show so like you know like I have friends that just have friends on the show and they're back there oh they were okay and stuff like that and everybody's just hanging out like it's like a you know a fun of

party and before that that was very funny because I bought a drink because I was like okay I'm not allowed at the drink table. Yeah. And I bought a drink and we're backstage and like we're talking about like the side of the stage at Madison Square Garden and I drop the drink by accident and then just fucking like

instead of like I go to clean it up they go you don't touch anything. They go they're bringing flashlights around and mops I'm just like oh god I look like a fucking idiot right now. But it's a union job. You don't do that. What's up? I know you're being nice. It's a union. Those are all union guys.

Okay. So that's why it's like, don't touch that. Yeah, yeah, because it's like so. Yeah, yeah. They'll do it. Yeah, exactly. But I get it. I get it.

I understand, though. But you got to think, like, they're fucking, I mean, was that the first time you're at the garden? No, no, I've watched Madonna there. Oh, like, you saw Madonna at the garden? It was incredible. Wait a minute. When was this? I was seeing this middle-aged woman.

And, yeah, she was like. Jesus Christ. Yeah, she took me to see Madonna. Wait, how? When was this? Like two years ago? Oh. Jesus. So she's still like

a puppet like fucking like looked sick. I really should be called Madonna in the jacked twinks because she was like barely the show and then all these gay dudes they're just like Yeah, they're all doing the ass. And she they just dance around her and stuff. I got arthritis. Like Jesus Christ Madonna. Like what are you doing? All right. Well, that was the first time you're at the garden is seeing

fucking Madonna. Yeah. Or I guess I signed up for Kiltoni before that. Oh, you were there at the fuck guy. And that year they were way more chill And like like I literally So I walk out this way I walk on stage And I hear Off and I thought some guy said mics off

And I was like well I guess my microphone's off And the biggest of it I'm gonna keep talking And it wasn't because I eventually you know Was it punchline I'm getting laughs And I listen to the tape later I walk on stage and some guy goes Jerk off at the top of his lock To the setup

At the biggest thing of my life And I'm like The fucking diary of race I just don't understand like Is this more like I don't watch Kill Tony So are like People go and you're in the garden

You're around that many people You get at the Jumbotrons I just don't understand What's the fun You're just watching comics And like there's a band there right? Yeah They're doing jokes

And there's a panel But there's no like And then they constantly Like did they bring like Major comics with like Does Shane Gillis do a spot Or just like So yeah

When I signed up the first year It was an incredible show So jelly roll comes out And he's just like No fat or thin jelly roll Fat dressed like a pimp sings a couple songs and then you know.

That's fun. Yeah. And then the panel comes out. Now I got skinny and now he wants to be a comedian. Like what the fuck is going on, dude. That's divorce. Is that what happened?

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, is he? I didn't know he was married.

Yeah, this I'm a whore. Oh. Hey. What was their name? Bunny X or some shit? Oh, really? Oh, really? A dirty slut.

Okay. Bunny X is a respectable woman. Were they married for a long time? I don't know. Yeah. I think, I mean, he was, It's weird that he got healthy and then he started cheat on him

or something. I don't know. That's what happens. Yeah, it's just I don't know. She was like, fucking his friend or something. Oh,

she was fucking his friend. Oh, yeah, she's got to fuck something. Yeah, yeah, Jesus Christ. I think his penis wasn't working

for a while or anything. He was just like, how the fuck do you know all this? He said, did you talk about it? Petus wasn't working? He, of course,

yeah. He sings about it. My penis don't you just got to. My penis don't work. I don't think I know a jelly roll song. I don't know any jelly roll. When he was doing hard. I still think of Derek Humphrey whenever I see jelly roll.

I was there for when he got that joke. Some guy in the audience called him jelly roll. And he's like, he got mad. God, that's weird. Oh, I liked it.

Oh, my God. He was, like, perked out with a little white in, like a hot tub, like, I liked that more. So, yeah,

he was a rap guy first. Oh, he was a rap guy first. I just assumed because of the stupid tattoos. They can't. That's a pipeline. That's not my trip to a country. Comedy.

Oh, wrapped a country. Yeah. Yeah. Especially for white white guys. Oh my God. Who started this shit?

Kid Rock? Yeah. He had to have. Yeah. He fucking hate that. He's the worst. He's the worst, dude.

You probably love him. I love them. Yeah, you do. I loved him. And then he just started getting weird. Once the midget died, that went downhill. That hair is like, yeah, exactly.

That hair, I saw my Woodstock 99. I was like, you know, you guys can sexually harass me as I fucking get crowded out out of here because I'm not. I hate him so much, dude. I, see, I love. a rich boy. He's a fucking rich boy from Michigan. It's like, oh, Detroit. I'm like

Richie Rich, shut up. I didn't know he grew up rich. Loaded. I don't Bloomington heels. Nor do I. Of course. Like, why would I fucking like you if you grew up rich? They're pieces of shit and honestly, they shouldn't do any art for them. They shouldn't be allowed on Keltony. Oh, wait, are you

literally for two minutes I was talking about. Did you grow up rich? Yeah. Like, what kind of rich? Not crazy. Not like North East rich. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Florida rich. Yeah, yeah. I'll tell you what though that I don't count that you're not doing Ivy League and all that

your parents can't like buy a lawyer or like off or anything can they? We'll see it let's get in some trouble we'll see how rich they actually are like exactly find out my dad's net worth by yeah well I just want to see what his network is

not only net worth like how much yeah exactly there you go but I really won't want to know you know what I mean like what kind of rich like did you always did you never have a job no I had a job in high school you had a job in high school then you're not that kind of rich dude

No, I know, but it is funny too because this also changed my perspective on rich people when the people that are booing are the poor people on the outsides of the arena. He goes, this is kind of a nice group of people. Like, I think for like a concert, they're well-behaved. In general, a comedy show, it's better

if it's not rich. They're normally like they're kind of stuffy and stuff like that. Of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that experience was you are like, damn, the people booing are these balconies, probably other comedians that aren't even signing up. They're just like, nobody else have a career.

Let me go boo it. Yeah, just don't get, like, what do you do? I think it's also, like, the crowd likes. makes it when the comedian's bad more than when the comedian's good. Like the bucket pulls. Yeah. They want the famous guys to do well. They want to see the car blow up.

Yes. They want the crash and burn. Okay. Yeah, especially. So they're going to force it. Then someone needs to do a Jeremy spoken English day. My God. There's a shooting.

There is a shooting guy. I can't even do it. Who's this? Fucking kill Tony. How does he sound? Unbeat. Unbelievable. Unbelievable.

The brought up was kind of funny because when I first of the show, he was like, he was like, incredible and stuff like that. And after my, I said he was, but I think he kind of forgot

what everything, like who even was. Probably. Fair. And he goes, this last guy, you know, I thought it was so interesting

he's doing comedy in New York for so long. And then, you know, I must have been feeling nice that day. There goes. Are you serious? Yeah.

I think you start. I don't think, but I don't think, this is the thing. I don't think he thinks about shit. I think he's just, like blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm sure he's worried about the fog machines and laser lights.

And I think he was trying to say, what he was trying to say is that I was surprised that this guy's been working for New York's along and like, I've never heard. How long we've been doing it? Nine years, but seven in New York. I mean, that's not, is that how long? Like, what's it like fucking, it's not long. Yeah, but I think it's for some people that's long. I think in his mind, he was trying to say like, oh, I'm surprised this guy isn't

doing more than I think he was trying to not be insulting by being like, oh, he's been New York for nine years and then nobody goes to fuck this guy. Like I think he was trying not to go that route but instead I went I just feel nice that day. You go out and then you go out and guy just I'm worried about mics off. That was a funny still like I really it would be so funny next to him I have a something if I have an opportunity like that just

Did you shake kill Tony's a hand? What's that? Did you shake his hand? Yeah afterwards yeah. Afterwards but did you see him backstage at all? Yeah so after the show like Jim Norman's very nice and I had an awkward interaction because I was trying to tell him like you know as like a pervert you know you're like when I was a teenager you're like when you're a pervert yeah but I was like I was like you know I'm in a weird

sex stuff as a teenager watch your stuff and it made me feel a lot less alone like I don't be weird I'm sure you get this a lot and he goes he goes I've heard it sometimes but it feels really nice everything but it started with him being very yeah I didn't just go out of the moment down that he's I feel like he's one of the most human he's just a human guy he's a Lizzo for perverts he's a Lizzo for perverts I don't get that what do you mean he was open about it before anybody else wait what's Lizzo open about Being a bitch?

Yeah, yeah. So she's fat and proud. Oh, being fat and fucking proud. Oh, okay. So, yeah, I mean,

yeah, I guess so. You're just always the weird guy. But like, I mean, Opie and Anthony and all that shit. But I like it because it's like, you know,

he's gone through some deaths and shit. He's gone through some real shit. I mean, so he just is very human. Like, did she had Gian Marco interview with him? Yeah, yeah.

I thought I was really, you know, good. I don't know. I like, I like, Norton. I don't know.

He's so sweet. He's a very sweet guy. He's a very smart guy too. Yeah, he's not retaried. He's smart. He'll phrase things in such a way that you go. Right. He had such a good thing about outrage culture.

He's like, he's never going to go away because people are like addicted to calling out people. It's like an addiction to like, it's a rush to call people out. So it'll shift what it is. But there's the same kind of person who does the kind of calling out things. So you're like, yeah, it makes a lot of sense. But that was funny because I was like, I was just up there and I'm like, okay, find out a way to talk about you banging a transom. You're trying to find the route because it's like. Oh, yeah.

You like work backwards. Yeah, so I came up. So Nora, you bang trans. Transgen's my dad says, which is not even That's the funniest. Transgen's technically correct. He's like, fucking, he's not like,

Gen Z. So it's like a transgenz. So it's like a transgenre person. Yeah, the trans generation. That's so funny. That's so funny, dude. So he's like, he's like, I can say transgen's right.

You're like, nobody's said that before. So you can say it. I kind of like it. Yeah. Yeah, a bunch of fucking transgen's. You know, you bunch of transgens. Look at these trans trans trans trans trans trans. You know what I mean?

It's like fits. It's like it really fits. I like it. Yeah. So I'm sorry. Did you talk to Norton? How was Norton? How was it?

Why was it awkward? No, no, no. Well, that was just funny too because in your mind I was like trying to do my transmit, but you have to do it in order of question being answered. So like instead of being like, have I said that part of the joke yet? Because to store that's on stage.

You're trying to weave jokes into the interview and you're going, okay, how do I, you know, do this kind of thing. But, yeah, it's a really like weird. What are they interview about? What did they ask you? Just all kinds of stuff. You know, like, how does it feel that perform Madison Square Garden?

I was like, great. You know, I was nervous talking to my brother. My brother was like, I was like, worst case in here, I'm gonna get raped in the bathroom. I was like, I guess anything. That's nice. Got a little pop up there.

And then what are they else they asked? And then they're asking about jobs, talking about the feet pick stuff. Okay. And then I would have gotten a pop. I'm really mad because the audience is like, take your shoes off. And I was like waiting for an opportunity

because like that would have, that's the kind of thing where like, you know, me put my feet out at MSG Yeah, why just take your shoes off? Why were you waiting? You're trying to work with the interview and kind of like... I got what you're saying. You didn't want to be overcome like your thing. Like you didn't want to... Yeah, it's like, you know, but then you realize on something like that, that is kind of how you do.

You gotta do it. Yeah, it's wacky talent shows. You do got to go out there and do that thing. Right. You're just going to be stupid. Yeah. The really funny stuff is like, you know, hopefully they put it on YouTube because you know, not a lot came out of it. So like, in your brain, you're kind of like, you know, I'm kind of like in a, you're in this emotional high where you're like, okay, so something, like, you know, it's just another performance. And then my mom is something, my mom goes, maybe he put something in the big joke book.

I'm like, mom, there's another, like, where's the big joke? That's so cute. I'm like, mom. You think there's like a treasure map to the mothership green room? It's so funny. And then one day, this man, Michael, Michael Good. Dearest Michael Good. I know you're reading this.

It definitely didn't just throw the joke book at the trash. Because the joke person's just like laying over there on the table. And everybody's just like, is this the note? You're like, yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, can't write in it. It's like a big joke, but it's not like, I would never write in it. I get kind of, when I go to... Wait, does he actually have a book like that on the thing? He hands out

joke books to the comics. Oh, he does? Like, laughing Buddha? Yeah. You won the chip. Trade this in for long free performance. That's how it's like his really how he started, he started laughing Buddha. Yeah, that's so funny. Did I ever tell you I accidentally went to a Kill Tony show when I was in L.A.?

Wait, so what did you, what did you think you were going to? So I didn't know what it was. I was living in L.A. working film TV production. And I finally was like, I was still like, this is many years ago. This is like almost 10, I guess 10 years ago. And I was like dabbling in stand-up.

Like I wasn't doing, I was start, stop, start, stop. So I was like, fucking, I'm gonna go, I found out, I met another dude on set who he was like, I go, there's an open mic at the comedy, mother ship, no, in fucking L.A. Oh, oh, sorry.

Comedy store. Comedy store. So I go. I'm supposed to it's an infamous mic and it's hard to get on. The first time I signed up I got on right away.

The guy's like, this is your first time? I go, yeah. He goes, you look like you'd be funny and I'm like, I don't know. So I had a joke in my head.

I saw that bumper sticker on a car where it's like, you know, women that play nice, verily, whatever, women that play fucking whatever barely make history. Make history and all that shit like that.

And I forget what I was trying to do, but I fucked it up completely. So I signed up. I get on for the first time and I bomb my, dick off. Like I, like, bomb like, I don't even remember what I said. It didn't make any sense.

It was horrible. I was like, I just fucking failed miserably, like horribly. And I got off stage and I was like, what the fuck? And everyone's like, well, man, you should come with us upstairs. There's a show. You put your name in a bucket. And if they pick you, you go up and it's like, there's music and it's just, you know, it's fun.

And I'm like, all right. So I went up to the belly room or whatever. And there's like, you know, the whole setup. It's like a little, but small. It's tiny. It's wicked tiny. There was like a little folding, two folding tables basically and like maybe two, three dudes.

And it was, at the time now I look back, I'm like, it was Tony. Yeah, yeah. And it was killed Tony, but they had it on, it was either Sunday or Mondays. I can't remember when I was either, I was Mondays.

Yeah. Because I went to go sign up and it must have been on a better Sunday or Monday. And that's what everyone did. And I was like, I'm not putting, everyone started going up. And they were like, I saw them go up and it would be like, you're a retard. Like they were going after him.

I'm like, why doesn't anyone sign up to this? Like that was brutal. that just what happened to me. I'm not going to go up now and humiliate myself. It's so far if you accidentally thought you threw your name in the bucket, you're like, so this is the open mic? Yeah, I had no clue. Why is everybody so mean to me? Yeah, it's like, this is crazy. So I left.

I was like, all right, I'm bored and I went outside and I went back. Well, it's just mind-blowing, but like, when I started stand-up, I didn't know what it was. I was like, okay, that's like a weird kind of thing. Yeah. It was kind of fringe thing. And then, like, a crazy rise. And the next thing you know, it's at Madison's Square Garden three years. It's crazy. It's just

nuts. You know what I mean? And listen, like, Like, I know there's like, I don't, like, I don't care. Like, I just don't care. Yeah, yeah, yeah. His specials sucked. I mean, it's not funny. I didn't watch it. Yeah, you don't need to.

We laughed their fucking asses off. It was just ridiculous it was. And it's weird, too, because Jeff R. Curry and him looked like they shot at the same spot. Yeah, it's the same. What is it? Theater or the round in, what was it, you think? Phoenix? Was it a Phoenix?

Yeah, I think you're right. Yeah. Yeah. But, you know, fucking Mr. had fathead Nazi shit on his. Tony did. I think that's a bear poking thing. I think he's just trying to be like... Yeah, I mean, I don't care.

I don't care. This is the thing. He's not sophisticated. I'm not sitting there being like, this is what he was trying to do. I'm like, I don't care. It doesn't, like, whatever. I don't even know why people get angry at shit when he does shit.

It's like it doesn't fucking matter to me. No, of course. You know what I mean? Like, and I'm happy for my friends and I'm happy for everyone that does it and does well and it does whatever, a little bump for them. That's, you know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah. I don't think it's like... I just don't understand why people get involved. They're like, you know, he's a fascist. It's like, all right, is he running a country and like, you know what I mean? Like, how is he? Yeah. And you go with this.

Well, people, you know, blame him for helping Trump. Did he go, did he go on Kill Tony? No, he did the Trump rally. But that was, that was, that was the Trump rally. Well, he probably got paid, right? Well, that was the crazy thing, too, because he made a joke about it. He's like, you'll do crazy things to get back to Massachusetts. He goes, I did a Trump rally.

Did you try to go back to Madison Road? Yeah. And then initially, like, oh, yeah, yeah. And then men. Untilie, I was like, after you go there, you're like, I will do anything to be back on this stage. Like, I'm like, I'm like, you're trying to go backstage. Yeah, exactly. And you're like, dude, I was there.

I got a certificate here. Like, it was like, you printed it out from a fucking computer. You'll embarrass yourself. Yeah, 100%. I was like, I would do crazy things to perform on stage again because you're just like, you're like, okay, I didn't feel like I had enough time up there. And you're like, I wouldn't go up again. I almost signed up the next night.

And then I was like, I get it. Because a part of you is like, I was just there last. night, like why, and it's here again, why wouldn't I not go back? Yeah, yeah, but then you're like, you spend, like, it's such a weird thing where everybody's like, oh, it's a minute, like, anybody could do a bit you go. It's very hard to try to, like, crank your things down.

Like, when you first art stand up, you could easily go like, oh, here's a good minute, but they're like mentally trying to break your jokes down into a minute. It's very challenging. And I was like... And I was like, yeah, it's such a thing that people overlook, you go, also people act like they do one minute on the show and then they're just like immediately celebrity. It's like, you know, a lot of those people that were like the regularists, they did the show a bunch of times.

Right, they live in Austin and they went back and like Tommy Nobraced it a bunch of times, right? Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I don't know the other ones. What about the other one that's like Stephen Hawking's? There's a couple like that. There's a couple like that. Okay.

I feel like Hans Kim is like done, right, huh? I don't know. It wasn't at, uh... I never see him anymore. Like, wasn't he like the first one that popped off kind of? I think so, yeah. Yeah, right? He was kind of like the golden boy.

And then it was like David Lucas, but then Cam Patterson came around. I was like, yeah, I'm going to be the black man now. Cam fucking see it. See it. David, who? Does he still do it? Yeah, he was there. I know he came to New York Comedy Club, actually,

to watch Cam. So it was a... Well, he was a replacement for him. How was Greenwich? What? He was a replacement. Like, he was leaving the show, and then Cam came...

Like, he replaced Cam on the show. Oh, he did leave the show? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. For what? Just wrote stuff. Because it's like... I mean, I don't know how I would ever do the show

because I'm like, how would I... Like, you're burning... You're doing a shorter joke of all. your jokes. People come to see you and they go, okay, well, I've heard the best part of this joke. It's going to be a very hard thing when, like, every Monday you're there doing a joke, millions of people are watching it. Oh, right, right. And anybody who sees you on Saturday. But doesn't it change a lot? Because they have different people on the line, on the lineup. So isn't it like you're regular on every episode? Every Monday.

Oh, every Monday you're performing. You're never on the fucking thing. Yeah. So it's like I would open mic it then. Once you get in, you open, like, when you like use it as it like. Yeah, but then it comes to a thing where it's like, oh, you know, the listeners are kind of like fuck this person. Oh, yeah. You go on their red. It'll be like, everybody's like, get rid of his past three minutes were awful. Yeah.

I, dude, it's like the worst. It's like the, it's like the fan base you want, but you don't want them at the same time. Because it's like they're nerds and they'll go to Antarctica to see you. But to deal with them,

like even when I was at the club, I was in New York Comedy Club, I was there Thursday, Friday, I forget what it was, but it was the, Kill Tony weekend. So they're all in town, you know,

Shane was doing the seller. Like everyone was doing their shit. We had, what's that Estonian kid? I said he was very sweet. Ari. Maddie? Yeah.

Dude, sweetheart of a human being. Came up to me, but he was on good eggs. It was Wednesday. He was on good egg show. Yeah. And it wasn't Norman's crowd, you know,

usually because Norman was on the lineup. And I remember I was just in there and I was just like, they weren't, they were great. I had a lot of fun with them. They were a lot of fun. But like, as soon as I got off and in between time,

the guy would come up, be like, I really like, and he wanted to talk about the comedy. And he's like, and I'm like, oh, God, dude, I appreciate you. But, like, you know, he's like, so do you write up there or do you write? And I'm like, oh, no.

Like, it's like, I don't, you know what I mean? And also, I'm not that far along to even talk about a system. You know what I mean? I'm just like, whatever. But they were nice. They're nice. But then when Kim and they all started going, so it's like, Cam's outside. And they're all like, you know, I'm just like, what are you doing, dude?

Comedy nerds. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a different. I want their money, but can you end up down? Well, my thing, too, is I'm like, this is kind of the best situation because I think the show is like a shackle for some people in a way where it's like like you're talking about it's like

if I had to burn a minute every Monday you have a career in like three months but also I'm like oh like I don't know what I would do if he's like okay you got this show you're on next Monday I'd be like I don't know my next minute for millions of people watch no you fuck you've been doing this this long you'll figure it out to get it you know what I mean

like this is where you gotta be like whatever and you can also burn a bunch of old shit and burn a bunch old shit you've 10 years of material you'll fucking figure it out now That's true. That's true. I mean, that crowd is that. You use it till you don't need it anymore.

That's all this bullshit. You use shit till you don't need it anymore. Yeah, that's where I was mentally, I was like, ah, do I get to the suicide joke that all my friends have seen at Madison Square Garden? And mentally you're like, yeah. Shut the fuck up. Do the fucking thing. You're like, yeah, but I get this new joke about pedophiles. I really want to try.

People were like, what the fuck? And now mentally I'm like, oh my God, I would have gotten booed by a fucking arena. And you're like, what the fuck was I thinking? Like you guys, like, I'm over that too. like people like like even when like the clip thing it's like well you might burn your material. I'm like no one fucking pays attention. No one cares. Yeah. Yeah.

You know one cares. I mean no one cares. It's like so insane. Yeah. I had people after I post the clip they go, that's a great joke. I go, you've seen me do that joke 900 times. Yeah, exactly. Or even this too, know what I'm doing? Because, you know, I'm always like, fuck-go-vovah, I'm cutting shit up. I'm like, take it out the filler for Instagram because I'm just like, I get it

monkeys. You know what I mean? You'd stop for a second and you're like, dude, that's died. Died. Died. thud, you know? So whatever. YouTube, though, I love YouTube, though. YouTube, you can fucking actually. YouTube is a shit. YouTube is the shit.

You can... YouTube is the shit. You could do... The best part of YouTube, I don't even know who owns YouTube. So, like, something can happen on Facebook and everybody's like... It's Google. Okay, so it's who? It's Google.

No, I know, but who's like the face? Because, like... Oh, the CEO? Yeah. It's fucking, um... What the hell's his name? I can't remember offhand. I'm sorry.

It's this dude. It's like Bob Eager. Have you heard of Bob Eager? He was head of, um, he was head of, um, Disney. He retired. And they're like, we need you to come back and he came back and he just bought, and he retired again. Was he chopping. Chopping logs in the woods. They're like, we need you again.

He's like, I put that life behind. But those guys, they all like, they meet up. Like, they all meet up like once a year. And they go to like a fucking thing like with Sam Waltman and Claude. They go to Bohemian Grove. Yeah. Kind of thing. Yeah, yeah. Kind of a thing. But at the hotel of like, you know, whatever. But I forget his name. But he's a CEO of it.

And whatever. That's who owns me. Do you know when they got shot up by that crazy lady? Who? YouTube got shot up. It was so crazy. Yeah. I was like 20. 17? Yeah.

Yeah. I didn't hear about this. Did she get anyone? I don't remember. Yeah, I had no idea. Was this an India YouTube or was this? Because those numbers would blow up. Yeah.

Really? Yeah. Wow. That was, that's kind of the group you don't hear about shooting people. You know, you got to go. There was an Asian match. I mean, they micromanaged the fuck out of you. Yeah.

Oh my God. In India. They're not. micro-manage the fuck. Every day? I have an Indian guy? No. I mean, there's some, I mean, I have some attractive ones.

I have for sure. But like, my thing is like, there's a, I, I get really annoyed a lot of, like, a lot of them are uppity. Like, they're just uppity people. I don't take no for an answer. And they don't take no for an answer. And I'm just like, I'm going to beat the fuck out of you. Like, you know what I mean?

And they're all like those computer nerd fucks like that they're the, like, look at Cash Patel. There's the fucking guys that are like, you know? Yeah. Because they don't like, in India, it's like, there's, there's, there's, billion people and it's like they have the whole they took the caste system from the British and made it on crack like it's like or

vice versa. I never seen the untouchables isn't that about the caste system? Untouchables? No, it's about the fucking mob in like Chicago and You know what the bottom of them are called the untouchables because people don't want to touch them like oh my god, I didn't even know that with this fucking slumdog millionaire

without you learned this? Oh my God, how the hell did you find that out? I think somebody told me about it and they literally don't touch those people because they're yeah see that's fucked like that's fucking crazy

man remember I sent you that video of the lady that's a psychopath or whatever oh yeah yeah and she's talking about and she was like

because her family's from India and she was talking about like she kind of alluded to that she may have murdered lower people in India Levi said me this guy because we were talking about

sociopaths and I'm like I'm just trying to understand these people and Levi is very like if there's anything about cults like he's kind of like you with aliens

both him with cults and I don't know if I was in depth with you as aliens. We're you in the N-O-I. Yeah, I don't know. The Nation of Islam, that is the most... Oh, just Nation of Islam. There needs to be a documentary about it is the most fascinating cold on the whole entire planet.

Wait, the Nation of Islam, are you talking about fucking like... So basically, this guy named Wallace Fard-Mohamed, Middle Eastern... You're talking about Farrakhan? Yeah. That's a cult? Oh, yeah. It's crazy.

I thought it was like the Black Panthers. Is it a cult? No, but... What's it's a cult? actually what it takes a cult to a fucking political? I think a human sacrifice probably brings it up there. Wait, they have human sacrifice? Where the fuck did you find this out?

I am, I will, God may strike me to have research this is the most fascinating. Where did you get the research? Where is this? Wikipedia? You go to the first page of Wikipedia and your mind will be blown. Hold on. What's it? I know the nation of Islam.

That's what Malcolm X is. And then they killed them. They killed them? Not the U.S. government. No, the U.S. government used them to kill him. So the person who actually shot him. him was in the nation of Islam. How about Huey? You know, Huey, the black dude that died of 21? Yeah, he wasn't, Huey, uh, Lewis, the News was not in there.

Don't need money. Don't need fame. Get them gone down. So let me surprise you will have your mind blown. So basically, a Pakistani, potentially even white guys started a black supremacy group. Is a black supremacy group. American religious. I didn't, yeah, okay, and black nationally. You know what's so funny. It's a national of, the nation of Islam. And I still didn't consider. consider it like a religious thing. I consider it a political. Well, because it's not. Black Panther. Nothing to do with, like, Islamic people are like this has nothing to do with Islam.

Yeah. I always thought it was just black nationalism. No, no, it's absolutely black supremac. Like, it'll, you look at, we were the original people kind of stuff, right? Like the numbers and shit like that. Like, we built the pyramids and shit like that. Yeah. Yeah, you'll get some of that. But it's also... Oh, okay. So the black spirits, like, so they're like the opposite of the KKK, where it's like, white people come from monkeys. They're not real people. Yes, they believe that Yakub,

who's this black scientist of the giant head created the Yucubian devils which are white people. It's completely the most bonkers shit. You call black Scientology. Wait, so, okay, you're right. It's a Southern poverty law designated hate group. Yeah, yeah, it's

absolutely, it's fucking, it's a... I don't know that. A lot of... Oh, they're just like the Black Panthers or so shit. No, like, black Israelites. Or like, oh, aren't they with like Martin Luther King? No, no, not even remote. Well, the thing is, I think lots of good stuff happened from it. Like, they create a lot of black pride. Right.

It wasn't even started by a black guy. It was this guy named Wallace Farad Muhammad who had 30 different aliases. They don't know where he came from. He was in America for about, he was active with that name for 10 years, completely disappeared. Somebody did a human sacrifice in the group. He left town. And then he literally started a black supremacy group as not even a black guy. And they have information where he was in San Quarming.

Whitten at some point under a different name. Get the fuck out, man. Steve, back in the day, you could do so much. Dude, it's amazing, man. He's doing Catch Me if you can. He started a cult in America left. Bro, you know what? He's also very anti-Semitic.

So, apparently, there's this former three volume publication titled The Secret Relationship Between Blacks and Jews, which is so funny, because if you look at Brooklyn, it's like, but they believe, the first volume seeks to prove Jewish people initiated the transatlantic slave trade by highlighting isolated

examples of Jewish merchants involvement. Maybe. And then black people even ludicrously credit Jews with creating of the second Cool Clux Klan, which I don't know what the second Klukelaugly. Yeah. Two point out.

But hold on though. The NOI also pushes conspiracy theories about Jews collaborating with U.S. governments. Okay. Well. I mean. Where you could say those Jews, not the Jews. Can you say those Jews? Those Jews? Those Jews. Yeah, those Jews. Yeah, so many, they're like

theories about, yeah, exactly. He has claimed Farrakhan has claimed homosexuality is the result of a chemical reaction and has convinced this follows a widespread homosexuality as part of a secret agenda being pushed by government scientists. I see nothing wrong there. But it's tough because I've got to discuss with a black guy about it. He's like, there's lots of good, I'm like, you know, I get

you can't throw the baby out of the bathwater. They did a lot of great stuff. Black water. Don't throw the white baby out with the black water. Oh my God, man. Yeah, you know what, Stu, too? This is really funny. I'm more stupid. Like, this is how much I don't think about it.

Like the nation of Islam. Like Farrakhan, I didn't even like think Farrakhan. Oh, nation of Islam. Like, I never even, because I'm always like, oh, that's like the, you know, Israelis, the black Israel. And they're the Jewish version. Yeah. So it's so funny, the extremity.

Like, I never thought of like, why didn't they go after it? You got the skirts versus the bow ties. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I know I definitely the boat I would be like the wire should have had an episode where it's like yeah man with the freaking guy

that goes to the library and he's got the best lines ever they're both smart I forget that but that's so funny I want to see that oh my God I would be so with the skirts which is a lot of the street yeah I just be like hey

so we're there about doing this can you guys have a little gossip here and where you guys got to go at it the hoodies versus there's got to be what would be the white people Hoodies versus hoods. So David Duke says that...

No, you need white, white. You need white white. I don't like not finishing that sentence. David Duke says and I got cut off. David Duke. Well, in the words of the prolific

David Duke. Man, I really don't like getting cut off saying that. Wait, what did David Duke say? He says the black Israelis are the counterpart to the KKK where he thinks it's got up

Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, basically. But they're Jews. They think they're black Jewish. Yeah, but they're not actually any Jewish at all. Yeah, I know. No, but I would think that'd be weird.

They wouldn't like them because they have Jewish ties. It's a counterpart. It's like it's basically, it's the black KKK. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It doesn't make sense. They're sharing. They think they're Jewish, the original Jews. Yes.

So I would think the KKK wouldn't like them because KKK doesn't like Jews. Right, but they go, you guys know, they don't like Jews, but they go, you guys aren't. Both of them don't like traditional Jewish people. They should be more of the nation of Islam people because they hate homosexuals. They're more of the haters. I think all three have a lot more in. We'll make more sense. This is the Larry David.

This is the Larry David. But David Duke's like, we've decided to cooperate with the black Israeli. It's like, eh. Yeah. Why don't you go to the nation of Islam? They're more, they hate. Yeah, just came in the lobby while there's two conventions going on. Yeah, exactly.

That's like the episode when he goes to eat the chicken. And he's like, he's got the Jewish. Oh, my God. She's like, Larry. And she's so hot. He's like, the chick, it's great. She's really hot. And he's like, doesn't know what to do.

I'm just, I'm so happy. I was telling him this. I'm so happy. I'm not a black guy because I'm like, the amount of... Well, number 585. Yeah, 585 is like, there's randomly rules I was talking to a black friend of mine. Seriously, dude. He goes, yeah, we have to have beards now.

I go, why? He goes, I don't know. Apparently, it's like lame for a black guy. I don't have a beard. I'm like, one black guy goes in a podcast and says something, you get a new rule. So wait, the black dudes have to have be beers now to be cool? Apparently. That's really a thing?

I don't know. He was just telling me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, dude, now, apparently, I'm like, you guys have so many rules. I know. I don't know where these rules come from. There's just a new... Wait, who's like...

I'm sure there's white guy rules, too. I don't know. Don't say the N-word. About it? No, I'm talking about how... Like, looks and dweebery, like that shit, like that shit, like that. Yeah, but there's...

I saw shorts are coming back or something. Dudes and shorts or something. I'm for that as a floater guy. Yeah. I mean, I don't think there's like a white... Above the knee? I think... I don't know.

I get exhausted with randomly getting mad at people for their family. fashion senses and then just going, I don't know, it's a guy doing a thing. Because if I see a guy with like a fucking, you know, weird. Shorts on stage, how do you feel about that?

I think I hate any stand-up rules. I'm like, fucking. Yeah, I know. I don't care. I don't care either. I don't get. It devalued the show. Oh, really what I was talking about butt fucking? Did it matter? I was wearing shorts versus pants. Well, that's going to say, I don't know why. I kind of get like, I'm not like,

some of the class, like, people get mad. I was with some old school comics. I'm like, what do you want me to wear a sweater vest? I don't like, you ever going to get on Johnny Carson wearing shorts? You're like, who are you? Yeah, wait, exactly. Seriously. It's like, really, it doesn't matter.

All this shit doesn't matter. I hate rules in general. Yes. You hate what? I hate a dog on stage. I hate that. What? Oh, you also don't like singing.

Well, yeah, sure. But like, I'm just saying like accessories or whatever. Oh, probably. I always want to bring my brother's baby on stage and just give it to somebody in the audience. I've seen, uh, I saw somebody have a baby on stage. It's, you know, it's kind of all you can talk about. about the whole time. But who, like,

besides, you know, fucking nut job, who else brings dogs to stage? I've seen it. It's always women. It's like older women, you know. Yeah, I mean, yeah, but who,

I've never seen it. Who else does that? I've seen it. Really? Yeah. I only saw the fucking nutchop. It's always nut chops. Well, yeah,

I don't mind, but I only saw that one. That too. No more nut jobs on stage. No, I'd rather nut jobs more than hot people. Get rid of the hot people. I'm done with the hot people.

Hot people, go away. Just fucking go away. Oh, see the exact same thing. Hold on, it's Jason Choi. Jason Choi, I'm on a podcast. What's going on, buddy? Say it, Jason. Not you're bad at all.

I picked up the phone. Say it. Jason, what do you know about the nation of Islam? Yeah, recording. I'm with Michael Good. Did you see Michael Good at Kill Tony? Oh, you didn't need to. No, he did great.

Yeah, of course. Michael Goetz is a stud. Ah, there we go. Thank you. Michael Good's a stud. Your stud as well, Jason. Wait, what are you doing? Choi, where are you tonight?

Where are you tonight? We have five nights left. Oh, you are? Okay. Well, I was calling to tell you, I watched Contact. Oh, you did? Yeah, with Johnny Foster. All right, we're going to...

Yeah, I'm going to record. I'm going to call you back, though. Just tell me, did you like it? I half liked it. Do the pod. All right, yeah, we're going to have to have you on the pod. I have a lot of thoughts about it. Oh, my God.

Okay, great. First of all, we got to get you on our pod. So I'll hit you back up. I love Jason. Yeah, you're on the pod right now. 13 minutes left, Jess. All right, I got to go. But listen, I'll call you.

You're not going to get cut. No, you're not going to get cut. No, we're going to be on it. This will bleed into their podcast. Yeah, perfect. Exactly. The conversation starts here and it's there. We'll put you in the comments.

We'll put you on it in the notes. You know what? It'll be good. They'll get the Asian persuasion. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. We should put his face. I'll really call you, though.

I want to talk to you. As if he was with the podcast because he was on the podcast. I love you. Bye. We'll edit in Jason Choice sitting here just for the last time. I told him you got to see contact because we've been talking about God's shit a lot lately. He's reads a lot of that stuff. He's getting God.

He's getting into the God stuff? I mean, I don't want to be like, but yeah, kind of. Like, you know what I mean? He likes like, but not like, you know, like believes in white hair, blue-eyed redneck. He thinks of it as like a spirituality more than anything. Yeah, I'm like, I don't know. It would take a lot for me to get back into it. Yeah, I don't know, man.

It would take a lot. What can you offer me? Yeah, exactly. I mean, this guy's going to put me up at MSG? How about eternal salvation? Yeah. You put me in a wheelchair and maybe all considerate.

You know what? It's funny. I always wondered why because, like, my aunt wasn't really religious, but then when she got MS, you got really sick, she became very religious. And I just,

I just don't, I just don't understand how that works. Like, I would think you'd be like, fuck you God, you gave me an S. Instead, yeah, instead,

you're just in there like, thank the Lord. I'm like, Amarder, you can't even move your neck. It doesn't like you. Trying to get square before you go. Listen, we're good, right?

No more? Like, no more. Just going to take me out and I go to the pearly gates and clouds and shit. Yeah, I used to go to a church. It was all old people. There's just a pearly wheelchair. Exactly. I'm like, damn it, dude.

What the fuck, girl? Sorry. It's like, once you lose legs, you lose legs. I can't, what am I supposed to do? What am I? What am I? What am I? God?

Not God? Yeah. But sorry, I love Jason Choi. And I figured it'd be fun. No, yeah, of course. Well, I think it's so far too, because I used to go there's one church and it was all old people. you go, you guys are such cheaters. You guys are definitely just in the last quarter of the game.

You're going, yeah, yeah. It's like, yeah. Then you see someone like Ted Barton, you're like, oh, Ted. Yeah. Ted's like in the middle of a sea of old people. Yeah, these old people have just like fucking done terrible things throughout their life. And then they're like, all right, I know I cheated on my whole family and, you know, gambled. But now that I'm getting old, I think it's time for me to repent.

Oh, I got. That's funny, dude. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I'm not anti-religious. I'm not anti-e either.

I just don't like when, um, don't. don't tell me what to do. I just don't need a book to be like, you know, don't sleep with your wife. You know what I mean? Like, I just don't need a book to like, you know.

Well, my thing to do is, I hate that nobody wants to admit that they think people's, everybody thinks everybody else's religious views are silly. There's nothing wrong with that. It's like, I would believe that if I thought that.

You're all silly. Yeah, exactly. You think I'm silly. Every Hasidic Jewish guy thinks what I think is, he goes, look that fucking idiot,

not wearing that giant hat on his head. Yeah, where it's like, where it's curls. You know what a dumb. Well, I just think it's like, also, I don't, um, I, also, I don't like the idea of like, it's like, this thing, like religion was used as a power play.

Yeah. It's like, I don't like being a sheeple. Yeah. So I'm not going to fucking sit there and be like, you know, you know, whatever. And I don't like think there's, I mean, it would be cool if we died and we went to a cloud and we bounced around and shit and eat food and didn't gain weight and stuff. You know what I mean? Have you ever had a heaven like fantasy where you think like, oh.

When I was a kid, I did, I was always like, oh, man, it's going to be fun and fluffy. and I'll sleep really good in those clouds. Like I thought about the cloud, like taking a cloud pillow and just sleeping in the cloud. Oh, yeah. That looked like fun, dude. Yeah, look for angels and clouds. I'm been in an airplane.

Like, where are they? We're told they're up here. And I'm like, looking at the window. I'm like, I don't even see them. Oh, my kid, you're like, this is bullshit, man. Yeah. No angels? Start to think.

But it's so many, because in my mind, you picture the heaven and you kind of like, I'm medically who have died. And the, you know, post-life experiences or whatever. And it's all wild. I don't know. I think it's like, I don't know if people, People start, I don't know if when you die, your brain releases chemicals and then you think about what you've read about books.

Oh, right, right, right. Or if people started writing stuff down. Because I'm sure people had had near-death experiences in medieval times or in biblical times. Right. And then they go, okay, let's write this down. I'm Jesus. I am the son of God. That's how this all happened.

Yeah. I'm one of those guys that I go, I don't even, people, they're like, well, he was a real person. I go, I don't know if he was. I don't know if he was even a woman. Well, I mean, I agree that he probably there's a dude that went around and he's like, I'm the son of God. you're like, alright, you know what I mean? I believe that part of it all, but I'm sure pretty, there's people behind it being like, yeah, make him like

the fucking, they use, you know what I mean? Humans or humans are, you know, always been, you know, assholes like that. So it's just kind of, but it's also like at the same time that's going on, you have like fucking Confucius in China. Like everyone's doing their own thing and try to make sense of the world, you know? Yeah. You had the Celtics that were all fucking sacrificing, you know,

lambs and shit and they're like, all right, we need some order. We'll have one guy, you know? Yeah, that's why I'm saying. It's just like, kind of like, whatever. I like the history. I like the theology of it all. I like studying that part of it all. But I see it as like a book.

Yeah. And I also think if I don't know more than anybody else because we don't know anything. So I'm not going to be like, you fucking idiot. I'm like, no, you have your things I think are silly. My things you think are silly. And it's fine. It makes your life better, makes it better. My whole thing with the Bible is I don't know what they look like.

So for me, if you just met them all and they all look like fucking retards, you'd be like, I don't want to listen to this guy. Like, you know, I mean they all like had weird faces and stuff? You're saying they have leprosy and shit like that? No, I'm just saying. That's not Jesus's style, though. He liked everyone for whatever they were. But I'm saying, you look at, I don't mean you actually retarded people. I mean, like, you ever look at somebody and you go, I'm not listening to a word this guy's say.

Just by their demeanor. Yeah, of course. And he had that too. You only had 13. Yeah, that's a really good point. He didn't like, you know. Yeah. Yeah.

He wasn't that popular. Yeah. He didn't like them. You know what I mean? Let's do it. They remind you. They're still looking. Yeah.

They're still looking for them. Yeah. So, yeah. And I also don't like, like my mom knows a woman. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't trust that guy.

Like Trump, you go, I don't trust that guy. But you have to look at them and hear them talk to it. So when some of these words written down, I go, I don't, sometimes you see somebody go,

that's a bullshit artist. If you can't see them talk, it's hard for me to be like. Well, you know what it is too, especially these day. The grifting that goes on now. Oh my God.

I was just talking about this on stage last night. I was like, what's what the, I just don't understand like why everyone's like, being grifted to me is like the worst insult on the planet. Like when I got fucking ripped off at Dubai, I'm like, I'm going to kill you. I'm going to murder you. I'm going to get my name.

How did you get grifted? It's embarrassing. All right. So I'm in Dubai and I really wanted it to be like so magical. I was like, I hope it is like Aladdin. And I like, you know, and I went to the dunes and stuff like that. And I got there and I was like, we were staying at the worst part. And we went to the fucking what's called the Suk.

But it's like Times Square. and it's like basically where you go and buy you're selling me now I know you would love it you would love it you would fucking love it you go there and it's like basically Times Square in Vegas it's like and there's and there's tons of gold because people go there but you're seeing like African like warlords going there

and they're buying like because you could buy like up to 40 like the carrots go really high our carrots only go so high here you can't bring in I forget do you pay in jewels or is that not a thing no they say they said cash and credit cards and stuff but they're fucking hardcore like it's crazy it's a definite

it's a culture and it's definitely its own thing but I'm like, I'm here and I'm like, man, I can't like, it just felt all cheap and like all made in China, not even made in Dubai. And I was like, I feel like I have to buy something. So there's a silver. I don't like gold. So there's a silver place. So I went into the silver place. I'm like, oh, you've got berberia perfume.

He's like, you like, you like burberry. I go, yeah. So he's like, I'll come, take you. I'll take you. So he went through this alleyway and I'm like, all right, this is weird. And he took me up to the whole area that had only, but I thought maybe it was stolen goods. Scarves or something? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. I thought they're all stolen goods. So I was like, all right, these are stolen goods. Hopefully I don't get busted with serial numbers. So, you know. So whatever. So I thought I was buying. So I bought a Burberry scarf and I forgot one other thing.

And I leave and I get back to the hotel and I'm taking it out. And there's three RRs in the Burberry. Burberry. Burberry. You tried to Canal Street. I just basically like that. So I saw that and I'm like, I got so, like my ancestors, I can hear my dad being like, you fucking idiot.

What did you do to our family? I raised you right And this is what You go to Dubai You get ripped off by some And you know Racist racist racist shit Right

Because that's you know He'd say like that And then I was like Okay I'm like I'm like I'm like leave I tomorrow We gotta go back

And I'm getting My fucking money back And I'm like So like This is tough This is great It's terrified It's like

So I go on the thing I don't care I'm like I don't give a flight Like this is where I'm using My privilege As a white woman American

And I never, so I went into the thing and he's like far away. And I forgot Levi, did you stay around the corner? Like I'm like, just stay here. I just needed you to be my lookout guy in case. I just had Levi stay there because he was down like alleyway from the lake. The so it goes like it's a long mall. And it was like an avenue off, a dead end avenue. So I'm like, you stay here.

And in case something goes down, so I have you. So I go to him and I'm waving to him. And the guy's like, hey, hey. And I go up to him. And I'm like, you have five seconds to give me my motherfucking money back. Or I'm going to scream rape in the middle of the middle of the guy. this fucking soup. And he was like, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo.

And then I was like, he's like, so I ended up talking me in to keep the silver, but they gave me my money back for the burberry shit. He's like, the silver's like, I swear to Christ, I can't hide the silver. I have to have this thing. The silver's legit. This is all legit. It's like, I just thought you like knockoffs. I'm like, why the fuck

would I like knockoffs? You like premium? Yeah, I was like, why? I thought I thought it was just stolen goods. He's like, no, no, no, I can kill it. I'm like, oh, so you're okay with knockoffs, but not real? Stolen goods? You fucking, he's like, I saw it. I go, yeah, we're different customs, I guess.

I want to buy stolen goods. I don't want to buy fake knuckles. So, yeah. That's so funny. So it's so funny. So, yeah, I got duped. So ever since I'm just like very like, and we had to walk through the thing.

And every time there's a white woman, I guess they held Shakira, Shakira. I'm like, fuck you. I get even more, man. I'm like, fucking stop calling me Shakira. Like, what game are we playing here? Asholes. Shakira, and for the men, they say,

Justin Bieber, James Bond. Dude, you ever see. James Bond. Have you seen the Indian Justin Bieber? It's the Indian guy with this cut and girls like, ooh,

and he's just like, how's going pretty girls? And they're going crazy. They're like, he's like the Indian Justin Bieber. But it's just because he has literally longer,

baby, baby, baby, baby. Oh, baby. Like, baby. I did not know. That's so funny, so funny, dude. So yeah,

but I'm just saying, get back to drifting. Real quick, idiot Justin Bieber. It's just so beautiful. Oh, my God. But I just don't like grifting. So once you get grifted, I get pissed.

So I'm just don't understand why everyone's just like, oh, like, they don't think it's grifting at all. Like, they don't, like, I just don't understand they don't get the bullshit meter at all. Yeah, and they do. It's like. But like those big churches that like give all the might, like Florida, they kill it down there with that shit, man. With what?

The fake church shit? Oh, of course. Oh, my God. You have so many mega churches down there and the nonprofits and they're making so much money. And I'm like, that's why it's so funny how people don't realize until now they've been duped by Donald Trump. You're like, how did you...

How did you not realize you're not going to get duped? I just don't understand. I just don't get it. Can I see Indian Bieber? That's like a middle-aged Indian guy with that. Bro, that is fucking creepy. Oh my God, baby.

Bro, it looks like he's got like a disease. Yeah, he looks rough. He's an untouchable. He's definitely un-touchable. 30-year-old, oh my God. This is creepy. The girls go like crazy when he's walking down the street. Also, this Bieber is crazy.

creepy too. Like that hair is awful. That Bieber hair? That's like He's a child. That got me a lot of pussy in 2010. Is that pre- getting touched by P. Diddy? Or is that actually during the process? I got a theory on that. What's your? Oh, what, let's hear it. I got that on that. So a lot of times

people have traumatic experiences and they take on the thing. So like for example, you know, like certain people, you know, hurt people, hurt people. So Justin Bieber, hurt by P. Diddy. Then he started thinking he was a black guy for 10 years. So, So I think Justin Bieber started acting like a black guy when he got raped by a black guy.

And that was his way of internal. So what you're saying is Andrew Schultz got raped by a black guy. Yes. Exactly. Absolutely. When I was 14, I was raped by a black guy to help me get success. When I was 14, I was raped by a black guy. So I had that.

No, I mean, not really. I was trying to make the bit. The bit didn't work. The bit didn't get raped by a black guy. Andrew Schultz on this book did get raped by a black guy. But he did get raped by a black guy. Yep. I think we're in exactly, we were exactly an hour.

I think he had a little Puerto Rican in him too. Yeah. The guy, it was a black guy and a Puerto Rican guy. Instead of creating a kid, it creates a new personality inside you. You know, I agree.

That's trauma. That's just like a form of trauma. Yeah, it's like Batman's, you know, dressed up as a bat. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

right, right, right. Okay, I get it. So, like, I'm trying to think, like, what my bullshit is. Uh, football player. I bet, uh, no. See, it's not that fun. It's not that fun when it's real

It's not that fun It's also like nobody mimics any other Culture Yeah I was gonna say it's black or There's no white guys going up there I'm talking to I forget who I was talking to We're talking about how like

Like in Indians like with the first generations They're either like the chicks Are really talk really white Like white girl white Like I'm gonna turn around And see a blonde hair Blue eyed bitch And it turns out she's like Indian

Or they do black And I forget who I mean I was I forget who was talking to And they're like well when you move here, you have only two options when you're in, like, certain areas. Either you go white or you go black.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, if you move to Texas and it's like you either got black crew or white crew, that's kind of what, you know. How fun would it be, though, Indian Cholos? You're in the wrong. Oh, my God.

That'd be really cool. You're in their wrong part of town. We need that mix. That's a mix we need to be drookers. I want, yeah, yeah. With the one button up with the checkered and the fucking bandana. Cypress Hill with fucking.

Indians, that would be amazing, dude. Ah, we need that to happen. Appropriate, keep it fun. Yes, I love it. Yeah. And we're wrapping up. Sorry, I didn't mean to cut you off. No, no, no, thank you so much for having me.

Yeah, thanks for coming on. I had a fucking blast. I'm glad to you. I'm so proud of you. I'm so glad you had fun. And I'm glad you did it and you fucking crushed it. And more others than the other counterports is where we're going to be seeing soon. We're busting his balls. And, uh, this is a thing.

Kill Tony, too. It kills me. It's like, we, like, I mean, like, that's why we like hanging out. we busts each other's balls like that. So it's kind of like, you know, I don't know, I guess I get like, people are the person of the kid. I don't know.

Like we were hanging out the other day. Well, you know what you ever? Sorry, you got to go. But anyway. No, no, no. I'm high all of a sudden. I got high as fuck. Where you're going to say?

You know what you're hanging out? So when we hang out, like our crew, we're all busting balls nonstop. You know what I mean? But we went and hung out with another comedy crew and we, I love them. But they were like, hey. And I was like, hey.

And I'm like, what? Am I supposed to be nice? Well, that's what Levi is like? He was like, what are we supposed to be sitting around complimenting each other? That's so funny. And I'm like, yeah, I didn't like. So it's just funny to me that it's like, kill Tony's just like this. If I started guy booing me, I'd be like, yeah, like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, you know what I mean? A lot of things are just like, it's a lot of things I don't think are as like planned. If you're like, okay, so then all these comics get together and they're planning this all right comedy community. You're like, people just have different groups and you, it's just like another. Kind of. And it's like, I mean, when you do kill Tony, I never see anyone going up there doing the Nazi salute. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, we're all making some fucking horrible jokes. I mean, whatever. But it's just like, that's like, Gorman's hilarious at last episode. He goes, okay, this is all, he goes, comedy is actually our way of hiding our, we're all actual Nazis. He's going to, he's going to, he's going to the other way. He's like, this is all

for us just to get a Nazi idea. So it was a whole plan. Oh, yeah, exactly. We're all going to create, this is how we're creating a whole new economic and political future. David Duke is like, we're going to start doing open minds. That's right. We're going to build a career. I get a right.

That would be fucking hilarious, dude. Oh, my God. Infiltrate the open my axe. Exactly. Everyone starts bringing their war of comedians. Oh, my God. You're picking the weakest grump of group of people, bro. Yeah.

It's like that one guy, sorry, did you just have one fucking clip where the one guy's like, well, comedians are one of the most smartest people. Who is this? This guy was talking about it was like some fucking philot, like doctor or a fucking teacher. And he was talking about how comedians are smarter than any doctorate that ever. And I was like, dude, I said, I go, I post it. I was like, bro, most of them don't read. Yeah, yeah. And like, five thousand columns are like, yes.

Like, yeah, like, like, no, like, shut up. They don't read. Like, get the fuck out of here, man. It's, it's so, we're philosophers, man. Yeah, I'm sure. Are you ready? Yeah, like, everyone's Dave Chappelle. You know, let me sit on my chair.

I'm a philosopher. You want pussy taste that? Yeah. Hey. Hey. Hey. Samantha Kennison, everybody. Samantha Kennison.

Anyway, I'm proud of you. I love you. Thank you. I love you to guys. And thank you guys for coming on. Instagram is where they can follow you guys. Jay Love Comedy. We also have a podcast called You Pick the Movie.

We got to get you back on because we have an actual producer now. Levi the White. Levi the White, baby, everything. Perfect. Thank you guys. Thank you.