Morning Good - Back of the Bar Death Match - Episode 187

Episode Date: September 17, 2023

Romy Rosner and Peter Angelo join the show for today's episode. They talk about non-alcoholic sober comics, wrestling academies, and showing your grandparents Two Girls One Cup.Thanks to Romy for coming back on the show and to Peter for joining for the first time. Click their links down below for more funny stuff from both of them.Romy is on Instagram @romyrosnercomedy and co-hosts the Crib Podcast with Chris Aileo. Peter is on Instagram @metalpetecomedy, so follow him for dates on his upcoming Gay and Dangerous Tour.As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michaelgoodcomedy and on Twitter @agoodmichael. Check out the show on YouTube and follow the official Instagram page @morninggoodpodcast.This podcast was produced by Paxton Fleming, you can find him on Instagram @yaboypax.

Thanks for the F Shack. I love dirty Mike and the boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They called the podcast? Morning good, good? I love that.

Yeah, by way, shout out to Tim's Brace. Welcome to morning. All right. We're here with Peter Angelo. Hi. And Rami Rosner. Romy Rother. God damn it.

God damn it. Both names wrong. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But just to let the audience know, they don't know each other. I thought they did because he was coming on the podcast. I'm like, well, I'll find a mutual friend.

And then you're just, let me just pick a random. Like just, yeah, find a mutual friend New York. Why did you think we knew each other? I saw a like. And I thought a like was like, oh, I just knew who's liking. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you could have just been pulling from anyone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I like everything. I'm an Instagram whore. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it means nothing. You don't really like it's popular. It's what you're saying. Listen. But like, yeah.

I went with just a like. Didn't even check if we followed each other. Yeah, I didn't even too. Also, because I told you, I was like, just pick whoever because I was like, whatever. I also, I talked to my friends in office. Let's talk to someone new. I didn't think you were going to just be like.

No, totally. Yeah. I'm out of a hat because I think. Yeah, in my mind, I'm like building this relationship between you guys. Like, they must know each other through something. Because you know what? So.

I'm sure we know mutual people. I'm sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But also what happened was like, so I found, out about the wrestling thing from your Instagram stories. And then I ended up going to the wrestling thing. I went to the wrestling thing. Which one? New Fair City?

No, no, the Brooklyn one. I think that was it. Oh, there's a cold. The death match in the back of a bar? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. We ran into other comics there. It was so insane.

Yeah, so I thought you guys were who else was there. Aaron Kaplan, I don't know if you know. Yeah, yeah, he was there, yeah. Yeah, like that's one of my favorite should they go to. It's crazy. Yeah. It's so much fun, yeah.

But you were scared. Yeah. Well, hey, you guys are free. September 15th. They're going to be doing with the Brooklyn Monarch. Oh, I would do it again. Oh, I'm going to go. That's literally, my birthday is like the next day.

So that's, I'm just going, I'm going to get a party. Yeah, just go watch people bleed. Oh, it was a great time. And it was like, I, uh, the, the backstories were fun. I remember my favorite was that one guy, there's one guy that kept trying to get chance going and nobody would join. He was like, he's a teacher in New Jersey. And everybody's like, what? Like, how do you know this about these guys?

Dude, crowd was crazy, though. Oh, it's, it's insane. Yeah. people that come to those. And I think we left too early because my thing is like, you got to go to one of those because the next thing I love about alcohol

is you get drunk and you end up hanging out with people you wouldn't normally hang out with because you guys just find one thing in common. Like, there could be a guy who likes smoking cigarettes. I don't even smoke, but when I'm drunk I do.

So next thing you know, I make a friend there and then next thing you know we're at some crazy after party. You didn't leave before Cassano a Valentine wrestle. Did you have the big bearded guy who pretty much runs the shit?

No, and this is what happened to me. So, Reddy, I mixed up names. So Cass, I was hammered. Casanova Valentine. I was like, hey, man, really excited for the show. Just kind of, like, put me off a little bit. I'm sure he's a fine guy.

Oh, he's wonderful. Yeah, but in my mind, I was like, oh, fuck that guy. But I got the names mixed up. So I was screaming Casanova Valentine because I thought it was the other guy. And then I was like, yeah, I was like, I was like, yeah. And then he ended up winning. Yeah, yeah. Does he always win?

No, not always. Like he, but he is the guy who pretty much created that. So the whole story behind the whole thing is, like, um, wrestling is still like governed by, like, the New York Athletic Commission. So they literally can't do certain things. So they can't do death matches in New York in an actual wrestling ring. Because of these reads, like, can't have blood and all these things. So they were just like, all right, well, just do it in the back of a bar.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We go over to New Jersey and they're just like bleeding the bloodiest shit you've ever seen. It makes that look tame. Yeah, I saw somebody jump off a roof into the other. Yeah. Oh, sorry. No, you're good, you're good. It's just like, ROM, you two?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. But, um, we're comedians. but yeah no it looked I saw a video is do you like jumping off a roof and fucking land it on a guy my dad looks so much fun it's it's insane like yeah

the death mattress they do it every and they just brought it back in Delaware this company called CZW runs it called the tournament of death it's one day like a tournament style bracket and it's just that for like an entire day it's in like the middle of a field just so that no one it's so no one

like cops won't break it up and I want to go to it's so bad but my brother's wedding's the same day and apparently I gotta go to that. Yeah, that's a hard one. No, you can do it half and half. Yeah, right? Show up covered in blood and tucks.

No, yeah. So, like, I love going to those. It's, but also, that's like one of those places I'm like, oh, this is where I fit in. This is where I like to be. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Everybody there did look like you. Yeah, 100%, yeah.

Dude, if you showed up in like a bloody tucks to your, like, brother's wedding, I feel like they'd be like, okay, trendsetter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That would kind of work in this day and age. They would just look for me and be like, you know what, this is on par for him. I see machine gun

Kelly pulling that off Just like a suit covered in blood Yeah, Megan Fox's blood Yeah, yeah, yeah They have each other's blood Yeah, I know, that's fucking hot, come on That's not hot Blood grosses me out

I'm not, it's not hot to me How did you feel that show then? Well, not like, I mean, in it's sexual contents Oh, fair, yeah Oh, yeah, yeah, no, I don't I was watching like, what is it? I saw Total Recall for the first time yesterday And he's like,

Okay, have you seen it? Yeah, I loved it, it was great but he was kissing her in their bloody and I was like, dude, I don't think I could kiss somebody if they were covered in blood. Like, I don't know if there was a scenario. I mean, me and my girlfriend are half broken up, but we're still together.

We're planning on taking a break. Anyways, the lizards don't know any of this. But I'm like, if she was like dying and like covered him, I don't know what I would do in that scenario because I'm like, you gotta kiss the person before they die, but like that's kind of disturbing to me. I mean, they're going to be dead, so I guess they won't know. At what point is it necrophilia?

Like, if you're making out what the person is? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You just choke her death first. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you folks, you like, you like, fuck a comatose patient, like, is that necrophilia? Yeah, well, that's... Well, they're not dead. They're just comatose. I think that's, well, it's rape, for sure.

There's no way it's like... Yeah, but what was the patient wearing, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They were just laying there. They didn't stop me. They didn't say no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was, like, a thing in Kill Bill, right? That was, like, the whole thing is he's just banging, like, the whole ward.

I don't know. I haven't seen Kill Bill. What? Shit. I know it's with Uma Thurman, right? I haven't seen it though. There's like seven of them. I don't have time for that. Oh, I thought there was like a million killbills.

No, there's a lot of other Quentin Tarantino movies, but... You think every... That black killbill with slavery was really weird. Yeah, I don't know what's going on to that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I also saw a dude. I saw a Meg, too, yesterday. That was a fucking blast.

Really? I love... I enjoyed the first one because it's stupid as hell, and I love stupid movies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And this one looks even stupid. Is that a shark-nato kind of thing? Well, it's not a NATO. It's a big shark.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I didn't see Meg 1. So I was, I knew I had to see the Meg 2. And I could, I would be fine. I'm like, the shark's giant. There's not a lot to fill in from that. But. It's not a shamalan film.

It's even less. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it says, I'm like listening on the way to like a guy describe the Meg 1. Like I had to listen. I was too lazy to even read a Wikipedia summary. So I'm just listening to this person, like, talk about how Meg 1 was. And like, they're like, have you, miss Meg 1 or if you want like a recap.

And I love, the thing I love is I really like getting fucked up at the movie theaters. Like I like getting insanely high, sneaking in alcohol. Nice. And just being, like, there's something about getting drunk at a place where you're not supposed to be doing it. Like, this one didn't serve alcohol. And I was like, that's, that's, that's, that's, I like, that's I can see why your relationships that day.

Yeah. No, I agree. I was wasted at my grandma's funeral and it was a fucking... It was a party. Dude, we were in Ireland. I was like 13. I was fucked up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You shut up and they're like, this 13-year-olds

not drunk yet. Yeah, my cousins were eight. Grandma's pissed. Apparently in Ireland, it's like such a thing with alcoholism that like you don't, if somebody says, I don't drink, you don't push them, you go, yeah, because it has the highest amount of alcoholics,

but also the highest amount of non-drinkers. It's either one or the other. Yeah, yeah, there's like no in between. It's either getting weight. There's no moderate drinkers. Yeah, yeah. It's kind of like that with some comics where it's like, there's so many that are like either,

I think there's less people that currently drink than I thought there would be. So same. I've been on some shows recently and they're like, no, I'm sober. I'm like, well, all right. There's also a couple people. Gay. Yeah. There's also a couple people who like, you ever be those people who didn't need to get

sober but did because of comedy? They're like, I know people that have like decided they're not alcoholics anymore. And they're not. Like they were like, yeah, I don't know. I feel like I needed something and I'm not an alcoholic. I just didn't want to be fun anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I do the idea of you.

I don't even, okay, here's what you should do. I want you to go start seeing sequels to movies. Without the first one, but then go into the movie theater and just ask someone there to recap the first one for you. Just go, I'll be like, so is he like a... Before we start, I'd be like, do you see the first one? Yeah, I didn't. Tell me about it right now. Yeah, yeah, the whole thing.

You have 60 seconds. Dude, one of my buddies did that, we went to go see Godzilla when we were in high school, we got like baked. And my buddy, the peak... Wait, which one? The, the, whatever reboot had Brian Cranston in it. And we're like laughing at the world. Like, his wife's, like, dying.

And me and my friends were just dying laughing at the movie theater. He's like, no! Barbara! We're like, ah. But I remember my buddy, there's a guy who went completely alone to see Godzilla. So he's like a big fan, clearly. Sounds like me. Yeah.

Or he's going to shoot the place up. But he, my buddy walks up to the peak of the movie. And he goes, so is Godzilla like a radio action dinosaur or something? And you can just see the guy just so furious. Those are the times where I wish, like, assault was legal. You know what I mean? Just a bunch of. Because if you're really enjoying something and someone like fuck,

because you should be able to fucking hit him really hard once. But like a sibling hit. So mom doesn't get mad? Yeah, yeah, just a little. Wait, well, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The greatest one is, I remember, like, the dark night God had, like, a serious shooting. A couple, I think.

Yeah, yeah. The dark night had, like, that shooting. And then, I think train wrecked, somebody's phone went off. And another guy, like, shot somebody just for their phone going off in the movie. Just, like, the most, like, not even, like, not even planned shooting. Like, the guy, like, brought his gun. He's, like, I hope no phones go out. He's, like, no manifesto.

He's like, I don't want to shoot anybody. Yeah, yeah. if somebody's phone goes off during Jamie Schumer's train wreck. You're ringing like twisted teas. He's got a fucking 22. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sneaking it.

You both have like a bowl's in your pocket, but he's got a gun, you got a drink. You're like, you need this. Yeah, yeah. Well, that's the thing too. It's like I thought about sneaking a water ball on a movie theater,

but like that could, people would think it's a gun. A water bottle? Yeah, for like alcohol. This is a common thing I do. I drink in movie theaters a lot. But I don't even drink that like, like, I haven't gone out in a while,

but like just movie theaters. Like me, my buddy. he's one of my high school friends and he loves movies so we'll kind of just go see shit like we saw Sound of Freedom a couple weeks ago I read acid to go see that fucking movie

yeah yeah yeah when we walked in just dying laughing and the whole theater was just furious at us yeah how many people were there dude sold out sold out

wall fucking Christ wall the wall you saw and you saw this in New York City yeah yeah yeah yeah mostly Latino yeah yeah yeah

not what we expected well they were like like were like you're gonna up free tires well I think it's because he's Jesus. Yeah.

That is a good point. Yeah, yeah. Did Jim Gavisa? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He is such a, such a whole, there's something, I do like him. There's something about him.

I don't know shit about him. He played Jesus and he's insane apparently. Yeah, yeah. He's like, basically he just decided he was gonna follow Mel Gibson. Oh, totally. Yeah, yeah.

And that was the fun part too with the movie because there's a, there's a moment at the end where he's like, everybody, take out your phones and scan his QR code. This gives, he speaks like very, like, earnestly. He's like, this this gives you like a free, like

it's like a pay it forward thing where you... Here's your free child. This is all a scam. I know you guys are all pedophiles. It's the real reason you want to see this movie. But his line, he always says, he goes, God's children are not for sale. And the whole theater just erupts clapping, like, yeah. That's our guy. Oh, my God. People, the way

people are so, like, just easily to get, like, applauding something like that. Oh, totally. Is insane. They'd be like, yes, this fucking movie did it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we saved all of this. We haven't done it. Also, do you like, yeah, they feel like we watched a movie or helped me.

Do you get mad at people applauding movies? No, but I do get, so, like, that movie, the messaging was just funny. Like, like, and it, I don't just propaganda jerk off. Yeah, well, yeah, it definitely wasn't. That guy who is based off is also an asshole. Really? Yeah, I don't know anything about him, but I. Good guy.

Yeah, yeah. But that's one of the, yeah. things too where I'm like, okay, like, I had mixed feelings because, like, clearly I went as like a joke. I was like, to see this movie. And it's like, it definitely has that aspect of people being like, yeah, get those fucking pedophiles. Like, you know, kids. Yeah, yeah. But, like, there were

moments. I was like, oh, that's, that's it. Like, there were moments where I was kind of drunk and I'm like, we got to secure the board. I thought they get you. Yeah, yeah, that's so wrong. Because, like, they do show, like, interesting things, right? There are pedophiles. And the, they, most of the pedophiles were, like, the Americans. Like, it's a whole thing. But either way. I do normally hate messaging and

movie, but I do like the conservative ones are fun. Like it is fun. Oh, yeah. Yeah, they're like insane because they just take like the most wild extreme swings. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, this is like the truth. But then we're just going to ignore everything else that actually is happening. Yeah, yeah.

Because it's like that they're their kids. We care about kids. Catholic Church. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And the ice agent was funny because the ice agent was like, uh, like in the scene, he's like stopping the pedophiles. You're like, yeah, those ice guys are good. And just like they're not panning to like the cage with like other kids in it.

You're like, hey, it's just he's holding his jacket open so you can't see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude, I think you said Ice Age. I think people who watch

Ice Age or Pedophiles. I was like, yeah, I was like, that's also true. Yeah. Dude, I had a substitute teacher in high school. This guy, Richard DeMontabello, shout out,

the substitute teacher at Winter Park High School. He claims he wrote the movie Ice Age. He would yell at students and, like, there was kids that'd be like, you didn't fucking write Ice Age.

He's like, I wrote it. I wrote it. The idea was stolen from me. And one day we came in, he'd always tell us not to smoke crack too but then one day he came in Is he a substitute teacher?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They let anybody sub but teaching they were a little more strict but we came in and he had these stacks of comic books that he was selling to kids which you can't do like that's against the rules You can't just be a vendor. You can't sell shit to kids.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But they were... Oh, damn it. Yeah, yeah. They were Ice Age comic books that were written way before I... This guy basically did write Ice Age and you just had the idea stolen from...

Dude, before you started the story, even when you said this guy's name. I was like, I bet you he fucking wrote it. I fucking bet. But like, like, we thought he was crazy and then I looked into it and I'm like, oh, this guy 100% had the idea. And it's funny too, because it's not like, it'll be funny, it'll be funny if like this kept happening to him. Like he had the idea for like mega mind and that got taken. But he only had one good idea because everything he's written since then sucks. He got like really religious and everything's about like God and it's. No, I hate that.

Oh, he can't do that. His ice age, but it's a fun. Decide coming as Jesus. A boy gets bit by a spider. He lives with his aunt. You're like, fuck. Yeah. Just religious Spider-Ber. Well, the one I want to see, I do want to see... He's spammed. By a radioactive priest. But it's funny to do, because, like, I don't like getting too political on the show, but, like, the messaging is always annoying, especially when you, like, agree with it.

Like, I was coming home for the movie, I hopped in a cab, and Seth Rogen's promoting the Turtles movie. And then he's also like, guys, don't litter in New York. And I'm like, oh, fuck you, dude. You nerd. Like, I never litter, but, like... You were like, me... Yeah, yeah, immediately. I was like, you know, I want to empty out.

everything. So you beat up the cab driver? You were like, hey, Stan, I'm going to kill some turtles. Right now. Yeah, fuck. It was weird. He's like, let's, you know, you keep an eye on your little friends in the sewer, you know, don't litter in there. I'm like, what, what? Are you trying to... I'm shitting in there, Seth. I'm like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm like, you try to convince me there's turtles in the sewer. Maybe there are, I don't know.

In the New York City sewer? Here's a straw. Yeah, I don't know. But that, yeah, that weirdly, like, at, like, 2 a.m. I said, text to my friends, I was like, fuck Seth, Roggan. Every time a celebrity stands or something, you just go opposite. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's a weird.

You're just getting militarized into everything else just like reverse psychology. That's how, like I'm a very rebellious person in like the most annoying way. Like I told us before, like when people would tell me

I couldn't stare directly at the sun when I was a kid. Watch me. Yeah, yeah. I thought they were saying I was not capable. I would just look at the sun. And I think my eyes

are purply fucked up from it. Like, but, uh, well, I know what I'm gonna do to you from now on. Yeah, I bet you won't fucking $20. You can't help me move. Yeah. Like, you can't fight that guy.

It's, I don't know, were you, I assumed with the metal, were you rebellious? No, but I was pissed, but I was in the closet for most of my life. So I was real angry and I didn't know why. It was like, oh, because I wanted to fuck dudes. Yeah. Which is weird, I still love metal. I'm not in the closet and I'm fairly happy.

I just still really like violent music. Yeah, yeah. Well, that's the weird thing is like, uh, because like, like, you watch it's always sunny. Like Mac came out and now he's like a different character, which that kind of annoying. me a little bit. I'm like, oh, I liked him being into karate. Like, he could still be into karate.

But they're like, oh, now that he's gay, he's like, no longer into karate. I'm like, that's weird. Gay people do karate, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You see Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu? It's very gay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the most gay. Well, and that was the wrestling was definitely gay. The wrestling was homer. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wrestling is super good. Wrestling and drag are the same on the opposite sides. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't even like drag. But I's because I prefer fake fighting, not fake singing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but that is the same concept. Yeah, I, pageantry. Yeah, yeah. Both great thighs in both sports.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can do a split. And dicks that are smushed and hidden in a way. I guess not as hidden in wrestling. Yeah, we said like the kids in, like, my high school did wrestling. I was like, well, you're kind of sniffing that guy's ass. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Well, that wrestling is super fucking gay. That's what I'm saying. And you're wearing the tight stuff. There's no reason to be wearing the tight thing, right? Yeah, yeah. I don't know. I mean, it's, no, I mean, it angles you. I did wrestling in high school.

It angles you in ways that's, like, easier. But it's like. I bet it does Michael. I think it's been a conspiracy this whole time to basically just show off wean. Because it's like, it's like... The band? No, I'm sorry.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The band? Because it's like, I don't know, there's got to be, I don't know, I could see a guy pitching it even further. Because everything was like in that sense. Like I remember everything, every little weight thing they try to say. They're like, oh, yeah, dude, make sure you're fucking shitting before you weigh in. Make sure you're like...

Were you good? No, it was terrible. You know what? I was, I was good for my age in middle school, and then I stopped caring at a rate that made me not continue to get better. You started getting drunk in movie theaters. Yes, exactly. Yeah, yeah.

I'm not getting up at 4 a.m. to train. Yeah, yeah. Because, like, I literally just watched a Kurt Angle documentary, and I was like, this sucks. Why is he, he's training so hard? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, it's crazy. Yeah. And then he got addicted to pain pills, so.

That's like a common thing. Yeah. Dude, I hung out with some Dorf wrestlers, and they had, like, like the dude came Dwarf wrestlers? Yes, little people wrestlers Which are you hanging out with them? Uh, well,

because I follow Mike, I do follow micro wrestling. That's hilarious. Yeah, it was a micro wrestling federation. Yeah, sweet. One of them's weird. Zoomed out wrestling. Do you know there's one named Brock Turner? It was the weirdest introduction I've ever seen.

They go around in the circle and this guy's like, I'm like the violator. I'm like to this. I'm like crazy Steve. This guy just goes, Brock Turner. I'm not even making this up. And then they, they just moved on. I'm like, I think I would, it's a fake name. Would you either choose that name or was that your name and you kept it?

Most wrestling is fake names. Oh, did you have like a name and shit? No, no, I wasn't a wrestler. Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. But like, most, most wrestler, I actually, I'm planning to. You're waiting for us to say you could do it. No, I got the permission. I was waiting for you to say I couldn't do it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, there's a couple of like wrestling academies in New York. Yeah, I was like, I always wanted to try it. For sure. I'm big, I'm athletic and I like to. How tall are you? Do you have to be tall? No.

I'm six foot. I weigh 315. I will say this. I do love the word Academy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know why. They have all my academies. They're all, they're like, they're like, that's not like our wrestling schools, but a lot of them

like to be called academies. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a very funny thing. Like, I was at the Academy. It's like, oh. What are you doing? What's at the Academy?

With my co-students? I always thought to be funny to put on a job resume. What's the entertainerating Hustlers Academy? Like after they're like, yeah, I'm a graduate of Hustlers University.

The school of hard knocks. Those things are so funny. There's this guy, have you guys seen Andy Elliott? He's the guy, he's one of these motivational guys. You know, it's always the same thing where it's just a guy yelling at the camera where he's like, you're a fucking pussy, all this stuff. I work, I don't get into his sleep. Drink milk.

Yeah, yeah. And I looked into this guy's like mentorship and it's hilarious. So the guy's a car salesman, right? Makes sense. Yeah, and he's an influencer who just like yells at people. Like, the videos are nuts. There's like a video of him, like yelling. at this shirtless guy whose faces blurred out. I'm like, why at a car sales, like,

seminar is a guy shirtless? And he has this whole thing where he was like, if you don't have abs, you can't work for me. Which is the funniest thing to have. Did that guy not have abs that he was yelling at? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's just screaming to this guy that's like boardroom, probably like a holiday in or something like that. They're just having a meeting. I'm like, this is so, take off your shirt. Dude, mark my words, Andy Elliott is starting a cult. You're going to see it in the news. And I looked up as mentorship and it's hilarious. It's like the first level is just like, you know, a Zoom session. I maybe give you a little bit advice level like

like the most expensive one is $1,500 a month and he's like this is Andy's best friend. It's like you have access to my phone line and my wife's phone line. I'm like what is going on here? Holy fuck. Are cults like less prevalent or more prevalent

now? We just don't call them cults. Yeah, yeah because like following's online. It's like you could totally say that like certain things are like I think they're done differently. Like there's maybe less like direct like it's probably all indirect because he's internet. So it's like you have your following of people that will like do the thing you want. But it's less like you like fucking people's wives probably.

But I don't know, there's probably some of that too. Like if you're like a big Instagram influencer, you're probably like, yeah, you're probably like, yeah, let me bang your wife. And they're like, all right. Like just like the minuscule like amount of things I've like messages people have sent me for even having like a small following. Yeah. I can only imagine if you have hundreds of thousands and millions. Like the, you could get away at the fucking whatever you like, yeah, fuck my wife. Like whatever. The people like worship you. Oh totally. It's insane. It's Yeah, yeah. So, like, yeah, I really feel like there's just lots of cults.

We just don't call them cults anymore. Yeah. I mean, it's cool. Let's be honest. Yeah. I think it's fucking. Dude, dude, I'm realizing now, like, as you're, like, describing it, my podcast, we get, like, strangers to send us. They're, like, they're dicks and tits and we review them.

Can I be on? Dude, we are more than welcome to be reviewed. And I'm realizing now, uh, that's a little culty. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. People are just like, do you like my penis? Literally, that's what they said.

Some guy even messaged me. He goes, do you want to come to a CFNM Clothed, female, naked, male party? I was like, I'm busy that week, but thank you. Do you, as a gay guy, do you like dick pics? Yeah. Yeah. Straight women don't like it.

Why would he not like a dick pick? Well, I personally like the, I don't think of, I prefer to full image. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I want to see the dick, but I want to see everything. I want to see the whole carousel. Yeah, well, it's like, guys aren't really like seeing just a vagina. They're like seeing a face in it. Because, like, women don't usually like dick pics. I kind of look, I kind of like review.

I like anything, anybody likes anything that you're not supposed to see. Do you know what I, yeah, yeah, yeah, I feel it. Like, it's privacy. It's an invasion of privacy. So they're just sending pictures. It's like, some of the dicks are disgusting, but it's still cool seeing something you shouldn't be seeing. Yeah, yeah, I feel like, yeah, I've always said this about naked people. People were like, oh, don't go to a nudist speech.

We bunch of a bunch of naked old people. I'm like, it's still interesting to look at. Who gives a fuck? Like, I still like, I still like have interest in, like, you know what I'm, you're like, oh, oh, that's cool. Like, if somebody was like, hey, here's your co-worker, uh, they posted and only fans. I'll be like, yeah, I'm curious. Yeah, yeah.

If they're put, yeah, like, I have like a nipple thing because everybody has such crazy nipples. Like, you wouldn't know. Yeah, yeah. And that's like my thing. I just like, it's just like, interesting. I like going to the beach. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. You just go with fucking nipple. You don't think if you go to the beach, you don't think adults who go to Disneyland are looking at the kids. Come on. Yeah, that's true. They're fucking are, dude. You're out of your mind if you don't think they are.

I see all these on my feet. it's like parents like, did you just take a picture of my kid? And like, of course they did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The world is fucking insane. But I'm looking at Tony Nips on the beach. Not kids, but adults.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. I'm actually like, there's not people I don't want to see naked at all. Really? Yeah, I have to be like, I have to be like, if I'm into the person, yeah, sure, I want to see them naked.

For the most part, I'm not that curious. Maybe because I've seen too many dudes naked. Who do, who do you not want to see naked? most people see on the like any person besides like okay obviously anybody I'm related to that's the only person I do not but outside of that like literally they're like you're fucking fifth grade teacher I'm like yeah what does she look like naked

I'm curious yeah then or now both both comparison yeah yeah yeah unless they're like sometimes it's just like if they're like like if they're giant or small then maybe I'm like I want to see the proportion totally Yeah, yeah, like, that's a thing. Like, I do a strong man, so I fall like World Strong as a man or something like that

and probably like, are they proportionate because if so, my God. Sometimes they're not. I know, which is unfortunate for them. Yeah, well, especially doesn't steroids, like, shoot your balls. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But to be like six foot eight and 400 pounds. Oh, you have an average dick.

Yeah, it looks tiny. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's height. It does, height is not a tell-tale sign. Really? I don't, for me, all the, like, the lankier the guy is, I've been with the bigger the dick has been. I'm just based on

Pete Dave, but yeah, yeah, that seems to be It's being crazy. It's weird though because you think there's this thing

where you go, okay, short stocky, that means they got a chode but that's not like a thing. There's like no probably comparison with that. No,

I mean, also if you're fat, your rolls, like that's calling your rolls off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cuts down on size. Yeah.

But like, yeah, all the dudes who are like eight plus inches were like six foot weighed 120 pounds. Yeah, they're like,

I don't know like that. I don't know. The penis is just like a, an organ, I guess. It's just like, I don't know. Great observation. Thank you. Yeah, no, you, you are right.

The biggest guys I've been with a bitch is like tall. Yeah, it was super lanky. The ones I'm also lanky. There's like, they're like no muscle mass on them. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's the, that's like the Pete Davidson model that everybody like talks about. Yeah.

Do you think he's on? No. Yeah. Which is weird because he like, like. I don't know I said yeah. Yeah. We both said no. Yeah.

Because he would, like, you would think he would, like, I don't know, something. His, he got a weird face. Well, he's got Crohn's, got the butt eyes. Yeah. That's what it is? I just, some of his face. Raccoon. Makes him want to punch, but not fuck.

And why not both? Well, sometimes it's bald for me, but him, no. I've been with some guys, though, they have, like, fat cocks and they just can't fuck. It's a crime. Really? It should be arrested for that. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

It feels like my, like, thighs's getting fucked. They don't have, I don't know if it's just a balanced thing. Yeah. I really, I don't know what. And I honestly, I'm like, you know, you have half the recipe. Go with another girl, figure it out, and then we could talk. Maybe find a piece that. Someone lines up better.

Yeah, well, that's interesting because Norm, I thought that wasn't. Well, I don't think there's anything wrong with my pussy. No, he was. It just didn't line up. His cock might be in the wrong position. I don't know. I don't know. It could be him.

Yeah, because I always thought that wasn't a thing because Norm has that bit about it. He's like, as if these guys, the giant cocks have, like, no idea what to do with them. But I guess they don't. Sometimes they don't. And sometimes they don't. So they say you just get by on having a giant cock So they don't have to use it. Yeah, yeah, I feel like, oh, I got out of this, I don't need to.

Yeah, you're assuming they can just do stuff with it. Right. By the way, I want to say this real quick. I got a call from my dad yesterday. He goes, in my last episode, I just talked about jerking off a bunch. And I guess, I was talking about having sex with weird things when I was a kid, like water bottles and stuff like that and fucking toys with mouths on him.

Your dad can't walk around his house now. He's haunted by these things. He's looking. No. Oh, he fucked everything. Like, we sold the house. Wait, what did you? Wait, what did you?

I just come back for Thanksgiving. He was like, did you fuck this? Did you, it's my favorite face. Did you fuck it? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Give us a little recap of what you were fucking. So we had... So, okay, I was talking about, like, water bottles, like...

You put your dick in a water bottle? You're get, gatorade bottle. Yeah, when I was a kid. What? Yeah, I don't know, you're just, you weren't you putting your dick in random things? No. Okay, I thought this is every... Because the last guys I had on, they were like, I fucked a toy boat, I fucked

this and that. Toy boat. Okay, sailor. I guess I had a hole in it. But I get a call for my dad and he's like, he's like, yeah, no, your grandparents listen to the podcast and they hated it. He's like, they were disgusted and they turned it off.

I was like, who put it on for them? There's no way. How'd they find that on their own? Yeah. Yeah, I was like, there's no way. Somebody else is like, let's see, what Michael's up to. I was like, don't give that to. If you're my family, I love you, but this is not for you. This is not.

Do you have siblings? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Was I get mad at you and one of your grandparents I wouldn't be mad. I'd be more disturbed. I don't think I'd be upset with my brother. No, no, I'm saying like, yeah, but I'm saying he wanted to haunt their grandparents.

But I'm also thinking the other way about it. It's really funny to think about if my grandparents had a podcast or like, one time when I was horny, I fucked a toy boat. You know, those ones with the glass. She should be like, just be like, oh, grandma, I don't want your fucking judgment.

You know what? Yeah, I knew you were a horn. Grandma was rubbing one out to a butter churner. It was 1918. It was so funny too, because I, like, really bad at my dad, which I really shouldn't have, but I was like, he was like, you know, maybe be careful with you. And I'm like, I'm just exhausted with that conversation of like, oh, you know, be careful people are listening. It's like, no, it's like, that's the point. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, yeah, that's the point. And thanks for the views, by the way, grandparents. I appreciate that. That helps me a little bit. But listen to this one. What's up? I hope they listen to this one. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, there's no. There's no way. They said they got like four minutes in. Probably reported you. Yeah. They're like, I don't know. he's a sex criminal, but it sounds like the behavior. It starts with boats.

It leads to goats. That's a beautiful book. I've read the Dr. Seuss book. It's a slippery slope. But you fucked that too, didn't you? But they fucking, I was like, dad, like, I'm tired of this conversation

about, like, you know, what I'm putting out there. It's like, I'm trying to get better at podcasting. And it's a lot of it's talking about. putting your dicks and things. And then... It's a formula pops. And then my mom reached out with the nicest thing.

She's like, just let you know, I'm really proud of you and I really support your career. And I was like, no, no, two support you now.

I was like, I don't need you. I don't need... I sent you an 18 pack of gatories. Yeah. Your dad's just now in like a Walmart aisle staring at packs of gators like he was in Vietnam flashbacks.

Your dad's going to die of dehydrate. dehydration he's never going to drink out of me. Your grandparents are scared of water bottles. Thank you for that. They can't hydrate anymore. Like an EKGs to the roof.

Yeah, that's how I was, dude. They're old. I'm like, dude. My grandma gets a heart attack. I hope when you go home, just start giving gatorades to all your family. I just smile.

Grandma, you look thirsty. They're a wink. Well, that's the yeah, that's the thing too. It's like, I don't, my other grandma who passed away, she had dementia. I'm like,

that would have been great in this scenario where she just wouldn't remember but these ones remember very clearly. Haunt her over and over again. Right. She keeps listening to the episode.

She's like, oh no! What am I listening to? It's 51st dates, but with Gatorade. Drew Scaringmore. I don't know. I do,

now I really want to know who showed them. I guarantee he's like an an or uncle or something like that. That's so annoying. Is your family like really tight? Yeah, we have great relationship. But I don't know.

It's one of those things too where I'm like, I get my family to come to my shows. I know. Yeah, well, I tell them not. Like, it's like they've been, I remember my dad. My mom came and I have a rough sex joke and she heckled me.

Oh, what did she say? Literally, she just yelled out, your mother's here. I was like, yeah, I know. This is my act. Shut up. You raised me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly.

Yeah, it's one of those things where it's like, this is what I. And she was, and she said, sorry. She's like, I couldn't help it. I'm like, apparently, Jesus. Yeah, that's the funny thing, too. It's like, my mom's always just like,

yeah, you know, there's like women in my book club. I'm like, they're going to hate it. They're going to hate everything I say always. So just keep them away. One of my dad's, some guy that works at my dad, the funniest thing. Or like some guy he knows from work. Not and not, whatever, it doesn't matter. But the guy fucking, he's like, episode 180.

Casey Anthony, funny stuff. He's like, he was walking by us eating at a restaurant with him. I'm like, that's, like, that's, Crazy that you've listened to 180 hours of me talk. Like, I haven't listened to all this. Yeah.

And this guy is just listening to him. He's like, that Michael Goodfellas. He's got some funny, funny knock knocks. Wonder what he's going to fuck this week. He's just giving your dad presents. Yeah.

This fucking fish bullies. I try this one. Yeah. But yeah, I don't know. It's, yeah, I appreciate the support,

but it's like, yeah, just don't stay out of it. What is your, so your mom does want to come to shows? No, no, I mean, my parents do, I don't know. Like, one, they're not going to come to New York. Yeah, yeah.

If I told them it was like a pretty big show, like it was an important one or whatever. They would come. But I never really, like, I was never like, come support my dream. I was like, yeah, you don't have to fucking come to the shows. My mom came to the early ones just because she was driving me. Yeah, oh shit. Yeah, when did you start stand-up? How old were you?

First time I ever did it was 16 and then I really, and then it was like pandemic and shit. So like 19 officially. When I was doing like mics and clubs and all that. Yeah, yeah. Sorry, but I cut you off. I forgot when I was... Your mother came... No, they...

I didn't really care that much. Like, they, I, like... I wasn't like, oh, you didn't come to my game. Like, I didn't bother me. Yeah. They were cool. They were... They weren't discouraging the fact that I did it.

Yeah, yeah. They were like, yeah, it's great. Go for your dreams. Like, you know, whatever. So, like, that was just nice enough. Like... Yeah, totally. Yeah.

Plus, I wasn't doing anything else. It's not like, I dropped out of college. So, like, do it where, like, a lot of people... They were, like, oh, yeah, I stopped going to go and... going to school or I did acting classes so I could be a comic. And you see her actor at Big mistake. Yeah, and my parents are like, oh, go to school. I was like, I was 25 when I started. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was already

a commercial truck driver. Oh shit. I worked for a living and stuff like that. I was doing it like, yeah, like go for that. Try that instead because my dad was a truck driver's whole life. Oh, that's fucking, I know you're a truck driver. Yeah, I know. I have my class I license. That's sick. Lot lizards. Well, I wish I was just what to say that. I have to ask. I was just going to say that. but I wasn't doing like long haul. Okay.

So I didn't do over the road stuff. I was back every night so there was no point of me finding hookers. Okay. I mean, there's plenty of, I mean, you go to a truck stop,

you see him around. Right, yeah. Male or female, both? Mostly female. Yeah. I'm sure there are some male ones out there,

but it's mostly female special. Lot lizards? Yeah. Is that a defensive term? Lot lizards? Yeah, it is. It is.

I've been called a lot lizard as an insult. Oh, really? That's how I knew what it was. Yeah, I mean, it is because it's like, They're not the prettiest ones.

I'm sure. I thought the definition was like a chick who just like blows guys in like parking lots. Like a lot lizard. Maybe I know it at specifically a truck. The truck stop hookers, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Because they know they're like to get, they're going to get something there. These guys are on the road by themselves. Right. You know, for the longest stretches of time. How do you not fall asleep when you're like driving in a shit? A lot of people do meth, right? Is that thing?

Some do meth. Yeah. Just, I mean, Adderall, speed, whatever they do. Yeah. You know, for the, I don't know what they do. I didn't, again, like, Yeah, if you're only driving. No, but I mean, I would be on the road, you know,

10 to 12 hours a day, but I would also be at job sites, like, unloading and, you know, could you shit up like that? Do you talk to the other guy? Like, I've seen some of that where you call on the radio, right? So you can, like, I, like, yeah, my truck didn't have a CB. Some trucks do, some trucks don't. They're not as prevalent.

But, like, growing up, I would go with my dad. You know, my dad was a truck driver, and he had CB. Right. His trucks. Yeah, yeah. The shit they say. Oh, I'm sure it's nuts. Yeah.

fucking insane. Like, that's where, like, you will hear the most racist shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen, I've seen clips where, like, one guy's, like, one guy's, like, starts being like, hey, guys, like, saying, like, really positive stuff about black people. And then you just hear the, just dudes the radio, like, get the fuck off here. Yep. Is it, uh, weird, was your, how were your parents when you came out?

Were they cool? They were super cool with it. I always wondered if it was because I wasn't, like, super, how, I always wonder how they would have been if I was, like, more flamboyant. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah, they were, they were super fine with it. How old were you when you came out?

25-ish, 27-ish. Oh, wow, wow. So, just close college. Oh, I mean, I didn't go to college. I went to college for like a week, three times. So did I. I went for like three days. Yeah, and, well, I think I was, yeah, I came out, started doing comedy, but I didn't, like, come out on stage.

I wasn't talking about it until a couple years into doing comedy. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, like, one of my friends who knew was like, you have to, like, look at you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no way you can not talk about it. Yeah, yeah. They were super cool about it, which is crazy.

Like, you would think my dad's... My dad's... My dad's... My dad is, like, a surprisingly liberal guy. Hates Trump. Yeah, yeah. But one of my uncles loves Trump. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, stockpolling weapons and, like... Yeah, yeah. You know, a lot of my family had the lockup Hillary things going and stuff like that. As she should, as she should. Yeah. So, yeah, he was, like, surprised. Because that was obviously going on my big fears. And he even told me he felt bad

That I was like afraid of that fact Yeah But yeah they were they were super fine with it Um Well I have a question about that too I was talking to somebody else about it One of my friends is gay And I was like talking about how like a lot of gay guys

Dressed like really nice And they're very clean And the mannerisms I was like where do you think that comes from And he was saying he didn't He didn't have like a real answer He's like maybe it's from like Feeling like you have to keep up appearances

Or something like that But I was like where does the Do you know where does the voice come from Very curious about that That is a documentary about it. I know that, but I have no idea. I actually, but I do have a theory that for, and it's really only pertain to a certain age group, pretty much gays who are probably around my age, a little older, maybe a little younger. That growing up in the 90s was when, in late 90s, when gays were starting to be on TV more, it was a very specific kind of gay.

Right. It was like, Will & Grace, queer eye, all that stuff, they were a very certain kind of gay. They were very flamboy and quippy and all that stuff. So I feel like a lot of guys grew up and they were like, oh, it's okay if I'm like that. That's the way we're accepted in the public is being those guys. And that's why so many of them fall into those like tropes and stereotypes is because they're like, that's the way to be accepted. I didn't see a fucking sports figure or anything like that. Right.

It was that I could be like that. So when I by any amount, I was like, because people also accused me of like everything about me being like a front. Right. Like I was going to come out and be like, okay, now it's the real. me. I was like, no, I want more guns now. Like, I'm more redneck. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, well, I've said this before. Like, I love people that have like layers. You're like, oh, you're like this, but you're like this. It's like, it's like a complex, uh, person. Because like, people would love, like, look at you and be like, oh, he's like a conservative this. Yeah. But, um, the interesting is I've noticed straight guys do the opposite where straight, I know

some straight dudes, like very broie guys that have a permanently affected voice deeper than it is their own. Like, there's just kind of thing like, oh, but it's like, and then. Dude, there's this thing where these guys, they sound retarded. It's not like they're sucking in, like, they do sound retorty. Like, they're like,

they're fucking bake the mango jewels. And it's like, it's like, they're grasped. They're like, die. It's like, guys, girls do it too.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's like, there's gay guys that might go higher and then there's straight guys that go lower. So maybe the,

the real man's voice is a bisexual man. Maybe that's the, that's what the actual... Maybe that's the straightest thing of all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Honestly, when we were on our road trip,

We're out in San Francisco. We went to the outside lands festival. Every guy and every girl was exactly the ones you just described. Oh, yeah. Like the judge bro. Dude, The chicks here are mad. That's always the thing.

I can't even do it quite well. It's like, I used to hang out with a lot of these people because I was like in a fraternity in college. And it's hard to nail, but it's like, you know, yeah, I didn't cut you off.

No, no, go on. No, but you're right. But I, especially at this festival, I saw all the people.

I was like, I hate it here. Yeah. Like you're all like this. That's like, stereotypes of any, like, when they fall, like, especially like, like, bro dudes. I can't like, like, I can, like, I talk to do for like a little while and then eventually I'm like, all right. I'm out. I got nothing.

But on the same way with like, what would be the bro dude version of gays? Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, I'm like, I'm out. I'm out. I can't. Yeah. So like, any extreme of anything.

Yeah. But if like gays, it's like so probably. Like I always talk about how to like, especially in comedy and in the gay. It's like everyone has like a background. Everyone's like a musical background. You're a theater background. acting. I'm just like, I got nothing. I got no background. I went to

comedy and that was it. I had no prior experience of shit. Well, in the gay round, but like, I mean, you're into metal, you're into like wrestling. So this is all like still. That's the two is people like, oh, because I like wrestling. I'm in the metal. And strong man. People like, oh, obviously.

I'm like, I don't find any of these people attracted. Oh, interesting. So it's not like, yeah, yeah. Because I like a little feminine, like twink guys. Right. Okay. My boyfriend always yells at me because like my Instagram feed is just humongous guys. Yeah, yeah, so he thinks that's what you want.

He was like, he was like, why are you always looking at you? I'm like, nah, I just, I like these things. Yeah. That's interesting because like I, like I know it's a lot of things from like, like Batman's very homerotic stuff like that. Oh yeah. You're like old westerns? No.

That's pretty humble. They're gay. I think they are. What? Like old westerns? Yeah. Yeah. I think that's dudes out of field.

They've been gay in Hollywood for hundreds and hundred years. It's all this dude. It's just dudes. out in a field. Right, right. They're wearing assless chaps. They just have pants on underneath. Right, right, right.

Yeah, yeah. That's always funny, too, because I think there are people that, like, we're talking about obesityality. I'm not saying the same thing. I'm not saying the same thing. Grandma just tuned in. I'm not saying it's not saying.

But it's funny that, like, we're talking about whether it happens because somebody's, like, alone in the woods. And it's funny that some people would fuck a goat, but then, like, not hold hands with a man. Like, you know what I'm like, there's the people that are like, yeah, you never fucking catch me at a bar with a man.

And then they're like, Yeah, I'll fuck a fucking sheep. It's a weird thing. But we're... Like, it's still a woman. Yeah, yeah. We're all... Yeah, I'm not fucking gay, dude.

This goat has a pussy. A whole little. But we were talking about, like, whether it's, like, you think that all those people... There's probably different levels. There's probably dudes that, like, are, like, sexually fucked up, say, fuck a goat. Then there's probably dudes that, like, there's nobody for miles. That's why they fuck a goat. You think so?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I think there's probably some people that, like... Prison gay, but with goats? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Field Beast Yeah.

It's the only woman I see. It's a goat that's named jailbait. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, because we were talking about, it was funny too, because I was talking about somebody outside this comedy club, and we were talking about, like,

how there's, it's weird that, like, the internet used to be, like, crazy with videos like that. Like, somebody would just send you a video of, like, a chick fucking a dog. Jesus Christ. But we're talking about it.

My buddy's like, he just talks to you, like, yeah, there's a lot of hot girls who fuck dogs. And right as he's saying, this is a homeless guy walks up to us, like, right as he's in the middle of sense. some guy just goes,

and she walks away. Like, he walked up to ask her money. He doesn't even want your fucking money. Yeah, he's like, ew, get your fucking life together.

That was like, oh my God. I remember, yeah, when we were younger, you just like go online and just find the most fucked up shit. Dude,

yeah. Without even really trying. Zero effort, dude. It was like, it was like, you look up one thing and then it would be like a guy

getting, it's always that guy getting like, yeah, the guy being fucked by the horse to death. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that wasn't his first time doing it.

I'm sure it wasn't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure it wasn't. It's crazy. There was a guy with the jar. Oh, I hate that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Two girls one cup.

Yeah, that one didn't bother me as much. It bothered me. I wasn't like it was fucking hot, but I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember there's a big... If there was a sheep in there, you wouldn't watch it. You sent it to your grandma. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, that is the... Dude, you remember that one? There's somebody shows their grandma, two girls, one cup. Oh, my God. It starts, like, fucking... Those are the best of reaction ones. Yeah.

Because that's great. It's so funny the difference between me and this guy. Like, what kind of piece of shit? Like, I'm terrified of my grandma listening to my podcast. He's like, let me show my grandma two lesbians eating diarrhea and spooking into each other's mouths. Like, imagine that guy's like, he got the clip. He's like, this is gray. I can't wait to put this on line.

It's like, he's head of the curve. He's like reaction videos for old people. He's like, he basically just sacrificed any relationship with his grandma for the rest of his life. He's like, I fucking hated my grandma. I've had enough birthday money I'm out of here bitch Yeah don't set be shit Yeah that's crazy

I don't know I uh yeah I'm Dude oh my god I actually like speaking of like reactions Like so I really put shit on TikTok And things like that But like having people do like a reaction video To my stand up clips Is weird? Is it a weird feeling?

Especially because they don't do anything It's just them nodding and then laughing With no noise I think I've seen That shit sucks Oh I've had that You dumb bitch I'm like what the fuck

They didn't even say They just go No You're lucky Yeah Oh yeah Well that's That's bled out

In the real world So I did a show In St. Pete And there was like A very euphoria Looking crowd Which is It's so funny

Than in any other circumstances People wouldn't be nervous To see them But at a comedy show Everybody's like Fuck These young kids

Are gonna like Hate it or whatever And this woman And I try out Stereotype audiences Because you can be like Oh They're gonna be uptide

Or something like No maybe they're cool But this woman it was crazy. She reacted to every sentence with an emotion. I would be like, I was watching Batman. She'd go,

hmm. And the next thing she'd be like, mm-hmm. Infurious. And it was like, somebody ended up walking them after me. But I was like, I was like,

this is like, I can't say it's, like, it's weird that so I think some of the younger kids have this perception. They're like, I have to have a reaction to everything. And it's not just like,

just laugh. Yeah, I'll know if you don't like it. I just want to fucking laugh, please. Yeah. There were some kids that movie last night. It was funny too. because, like, they should have been an hour late,

and then, like, at the peak of the movie, they're like, are you cool if we, like, roll a joint in here? And we're like, dude, we're two guys. No, you fuckers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hand it over. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm a cop.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I should have done that. I should have fucked in the big. You guys are fucking, what's funny? Yeah, I can't, I can't get it. I'll tell you guys later. It's going to be a crime. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was like, I can't breathe that up.

But, yeah, that was great just, because we were originally alone in the movie theater, and we just start taking shit. And there was, I really pushed it. I was like, I really don't have to drink more, but I'm like, this is making it a lot more fun. I want to go to the movies with you now. Dude, we should. It's a great time. Yeah.

Well, because you, do you like action movies? Yes. Oh, fuck. I like, I like all movies. So you look like you like, he's like, yeah, yeah. This is like the prototype for guy who likes action movies. Yeah, yeah. I have a poster of Steven Segal on my wall.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like action. Fucking under siege. Come on. Let's do it. Dude, he's great. He's my favorite still that video of him. There's like, fake fighting thing.

Yes, and he's like totally real. There's like, there's like 10 guys coming after him. He's just like slightly pushing. Yeah, he's just like swatting them. Pushing them away. They're going flying and you like that. He's like a notorious piece of shit too. Oh, totally.

Yeah. Well, he got like me too, right? Like, I think hard. There's, I know there, there are levels to it. There are levels. I actually never heard of him being me too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's mostly other actors just being like, he sucks.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like a, isn't he like a cop in some local town? Yeah, but he doesn't, Russia now. Isn't Russia? Yeah. That's fucking crazy. That's awesome.

Me and my friend, me and my friend, like he had a re-moviker like six years ago. We drank a bunch of absinth and tried to watch it. It was fucking retarded. Watch which one? It was one that was like on Netflix so we didn't even know about it was like newer.

So he was still like fat and old. Yeah, yeah. Drink a bunch of absinth to try to watch it. Couldn't do it. Yeah, yeah. Couldn't tell you a thing that happened. It's like being accused of me too and then moving to Russia is like,

I think we know you did it. Yeah. Not exactly an innocent... Not exactly an innocent guy's next plan. Yeah, yeah. Well, that's what... France people did that for, like, Roman Polansky did it. Yeah.

And then, that's a hilarious. Oh, he did a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're just like, yeah, they're a little cooler over here. I also just watched Chinatown. They don't want to keep quiet. Yeah, yeah. Not too long.

The Romans Polanski movie, China Town. Yeah, yeah. The balls for him to make a movie where the child predator survives and the woman gets shot to death. Oh, yeah, yeah. At the end of a film. film and that wasn't the original ending he'd changed it. Oh really? Yeah, let me just make it fucking... Let me just make it cool.

But also I do respect. He's like, I want the good guy to win. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, the hero. Yeah, it is funny too because, like, I wish they made more movies where, like, shit just got fucked. Like, it is kind of annoying when things are a little too predictable sometimes. We're like, oh, okay, the guy's gonna win. But like, the end of like, if, like, at the end of, like, Batman, if you got shot in the head, I'd be like, this is cool, this is different. I don't mind this. The mist. Oh, no, no. This is Stephen King one. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Watch that one. I haven't seen that. Well, horror movies the only genre that does that, though, because it's like, I feel like... Yeah, because action movies have like that,

like, they are still the good versus evil, like very straightforward, totally, yeah. But one thing they could do is like, I think probably with action movies, too, like sequel-wise, they're like, they're in their mind,

they're like, we got to make a sequel. Yeah, because they always make so much money and like, yeah, they're always... Yeah, everyone's always worried about franchises. Yeah, but you could just do what they did in crank too,

where he dies, and they're just like, it's not real. We, so... Have you seen the crank movies? No, no, I love the crank movies. Oh, fuck, yes, dude. But we, um, we rewatched the second one.

The most insane movie ever did. It is not as good as we had remembered. The first one still loved. The second one, we didn't not remember how racist it was. Oh, I don't remember. It was, I haven't seen it recently. No, yeah, rewatch it. Oh, really?

And then also watch it with someone who's from China. Not a fan. Yeah. We forgot how racist that fucking movie is. See, I didn't, I didn't. It's like still great and wild, but you're still, like, like oh shit man i i still like after rewatching it i'm like okay the first one is like yeah yeah but uh the second one i was like woof yeah rough like like what like what uh it's just like

it's just like i feel they tried to go like almost too much bigger they're like what if every but not to like i don't i would have just fun finally just like more of violence bigger we didn't have to go like cartoonishly racist bigger and like like the chick that's always running around Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, oh, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny. Or, no, that's my name. His name is Chilio. Chilios, yeah, yeah. I, I, yeah. Still a fun movie and Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's, like, literally, like, the hooker from, what's it called? $5. What movie's that?

They literally just took her, full metal jacket, threw her in, like, 2010. And they're like, all right, this is her. Yeah, the whole time, she's like, fucking, fuck me, me, Chilios. And I'm like, just while he's trying to do, like, anything. Like, like, when you should just going to fuck you on the street. But I did, like, a lot of the extremism with it. because, like, the second scene, he's just shoving a shotgun in some guy's ass after he dips it in oil. And then there's a part where they become, there's part of they become claymation. And they're like, they look at a Godzilla-style fight scene.

It's insane. And then the villain at the end of the movie is a floating head in the tank. It's awesome. Yeah, we did like a weird drinking game with it in college. We're like, all right, one shot when they say, fuck you, Chilios, like a line of Coke. Every time you see a nipple. It's not a drinking game, man. Yeah, yeah, no, no, no.

It became a dangerous. It was a dangerous, uh, it was a dangerous game. Fuck, we, I'm trying to remember what drinking game we did like years ago for a movie. That's like notoriously bad. Yeah. And it's like one of those ones we were like, we were blackout. Yeah. An hour and a half.

An hour into the movie. We're just like, fuck, we're gonna die. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, those are always, yeah, I like that. I'm like, yeah, drinking game. You do a bunch of cocaine. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. The rules change so quickly. Yeah. I do, uh, I know you got to get going. So I'm down to wrap up now. That's, uh, yeah, I got a. All right. All right.

Perfect. So what do you guys want to promote? Honestly, just follow me on Instagram, Metal Pete Comedy. All my dates and stuff like that come out. I'll have new clips. I should have some new stuff coming out. But yeah, Metal Pete Comedy on Instagram and TikTok. Yeah, just my Instagram, Romie Rosser comedy.

Does that say Jew on your knuckle? It says view. Okay. I just last second, I was like, what? Did he do that for me? Did you do that for me? Oh, shit. That's a little look that says Jew.

Yeah, like in the last second, I was like, wait, does this guy have Jew on his knuckles? Let me send that to my mom real quick.