Morning Good - BBW Striptacular - Episode 233

Episode Date: August 18, 2024

Ryan O'Toole, Levi White, and an extra mystery guest join the show for today's episode. They shout at each other about the NYC heat and making a difference in the world, and Michael shares his Kill Tony experience.URGENT: HELP US FIND ANTONIO! a beloved senior bodega cat has been stolen in Queens, NY. If you have any information that might be helpful to the search, please DM @helpusfindantonio on Instagram.Thanks to Ryan and Levi for coming back on the show. Check them out on previous episodes of the show and hit the links down below for more. Ryan O'Toole is on Instagram as well @itsryanotoole and hosts his own podcast, The Ryan O'Toole Podcast. Levi is on Instagram @levithewhiteAs always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michaelgoodcomedy and on Twitter @agoodmichael. Check out the show on YouTube and follow the official Instagram page @morninggoodpodcast.

Thanks for the F-Shack. Love dirty Mike and the boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They called the podcast? Morning, very good. Oh, I love it.

Hey, welcome to the air. Thanks. And we're fucking rolling with a Ryan O'Toole. Yeah. And Levi. The temperature feels like I'm literally rolling right now. He's complaining about the weather in here. Complaining about the weather.

I'm being 100% honest. about the climate I'm experiencing right now. I rode the J-Train over here. The J-Train, one of the most infested, filthiest pieces of shit I have ever seen society create in my entire life, and the climate was much more comfortable in there. Much more. And the entire time, I was worried about getting stabbed

the entire ride over here, okay? Yeah, you don't have to worry. There's a bunch of pocies living in this apartment. Nobody, I don't know who, Jake's probably the toughest guy here, and he's still pretty docile. What the fuck does that have to do with turning an air conditioner run? Well, because you're telling me, somebody's, you're going to get stabbed on the train.

I was saying this is an environment where you wouldn't get stabbed. So it's a plus. I would rather be on the train about you get murdered by 13 Puerto Ricans than sit in this fucking 115 degree room right now, Michael, good. And then when you think it can't go to worse, I go in the bathroom, it's fucking 8 billion degrees in there, dude. Well, I just took a shower, so. I was a hold up here on the microphone. Why?

Because the cords are fucked. Yeah, he hates it. They get new cords. Dude, it's fucking, yeah, yeah. We also don't know how to turn the light off in the fucking bathroom. That's what it was. Jake, do you know how to turn the light off? Just like the train.

No one has to shut the light off. It broke. Okay, I thought we just never figured out how to do it. Where's the super? Hey, what, give me his phone number right now. Give me his fucking phone number right now. He can't call you on Tuesdays. It's a Jewish holiday.

It is a Jewish holiday. He is getting called 25,000 times. He can't answer his phone on it. No. How about you have some rights for yourself? Turn off your bat. You know how much money that's costing you? You know, they raise the prices of electricity

during the summer months. They're, they raised the prices of electricity in the summer months. Are you sure you don't just use more electricity? You do use more electricity and they also increase the price. How does that legal? Read your bill!

I don't read. I'm just... They can do whatever the fuck they want. I would rather pay more money than fucking read. I don't know. You can pay me to fucking read. I mean, I'm not surprised. I'm not...

I don't disagree. Aren't you a big like you, aren't you a big like fuck my landlord guy? What do you mean? Like you fuck him for rent, for it to be friends. Okay, yeah. No, yeah, good one.

Yeah, no, no, no. Aren't you a big like, you're always starting shit with your landlord, right? You're trying to get out of leases? Starting shit with my land. What do you mean? Embracing my human rights? Yeah, yeah.

You can't turn your bathroom light off. And you're accusing me how I deal with my landlord? You can't turn your bathroom light off right now if you wanted to. What a, okay. And you're telling me, I'm a lunatic with my, you're a lunatic with your landlord. What do you do? Let them fuck these weirdos you meet off the internet too. Are you kidding? I'm a fucking nutcase. Are you out of your fucking mind? If my landlord, if I was ever in a room where they told me I couldn't, and I was paying one dollar a month, one dollar for life, okay? And they told me, I would fucking kill my landlord. You should give me his phone number right now. Well, it'd be a

hate crime because with that box an accent killing a Jewish just know what you're going to get. That's a heap of violation. Okay? Are you out of your mind? HIPA. What do you mean?

You're thinking of OSHA. Something. It's something. It's something. I'll tell you what. For this neighborhood, the fact you're not, you know, scouring the local law scene about that

really speaks to you guys' lack of will. What's that supposed to mean? It means I would get one of these lawyers in this neighborhood and sue the shit out of whoever owns this. Yeah, but they all know each of them. No. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're best friends.

Of course. Yeah, they do Jewish stuff together. Yeah, like get money for white people that are trying to gentrify the neighborhood. Not a bad point. Not a bad point. Wait, I want to know this, though. You have gone through things with your, having you gone things where you weren't paying rent or something like that? Like, you chose not to?

Chose not to pay rents, no. I don't know. We're in a group chat together. I don't know what is real and what is not real. I pay my rent. The first of every month, I pay my money. I thought you were saying. they raised your rent.

You said you're not going to pay it. Who? You? No, I'm the... This is also weird because now I'm pulling like group chat things from like a year ago.

You're like, why the fuck would I remember that? No, everything's good with me. You know, everything's good with me. But I, you know, but that's because I know it's like,

it's not that everything. I think what you're thinking of, you probably think I'm assert, I don't, I, like, when I'm living there, I tell the landlord what to do. That's what I pay money for. You know what I mean?

You don't get, that's the problem with New York. Is everyone has these shit supers and shitty fucking landlords, and you'll just let them piss all over you. You know what I mean? Well, you just established. I like that. Yeah, I'll call my landlord 55 fucking times in a day if there's something not wrong.

There's no doubt about that. Yeah, that is a good point. I do pay this guy. Good points. It's the most expensive city in the world, and you can't shut your bathroom light off. My producer's going to have to do so much work to level. What do I give a fuck for? I'm not saying you.

What fuck do you? Fuck! What else do I got to do to make them do more work? I'll fucking become six stars, all right? Oh, it's hotter than Africa in here. This is why crime goes up. Okay? Because it's hot?

Yes. You're just basing that off of do the right thing. That's the only... No, it's a fact. It's a fucking fact. People are getting literally, there's no... Is that why Africa's so violent because it's hot? I mean, I guess in theory there's not...

Wait a second. No, I'm talking about cities. I'm not talking about African Americans. I'm talking about Africa. No shit. No shit. He said, oh. He said, uh,

Africa is not a safe place. I don't think it's racist to say that. That's actually the best point against racism. You say it's so violent in Africa because it's so hot there. Yeah. Is it the hottest place on earth? In the Middle East, you know what I mean? There's crime there too.

I mean, war crimes. They don't exactly get flurries in Gaza this time of year, you know? Yeah, I wonder how much crime is going on in, like, Alaska. All the time. No, bro, look at New York. Look at shitty neighborhoods. This is a fact. This is a fact. Look at a shitty neighborhood in July and compare it to February.

It's still, yeah, bad and it's not even close. And you could take that and equate that to anywhere in society. That's not just like a fucking, that's everybody. That's everyone right now. I'm not bringing groups into this. But I'm saying. Why does this keep wrapping around to become the racist thing? No, no, no, he gave me a look.

Because one of you guys said something about Africa. Because one of you guys said something about Africa. It's no different than Chicago or New York, a fucking. anywhere else. There's a little difference between Africa and Chicago. But what I'm saying, there's not when it comes to crime rising when the heat So you're saying if you were to map out the temperature change in Africa

and the temperature change in Chicago. You're not understanding what I'm saying. I'm clearly not. That's why I'm asking you a fucking question. I'm telling you no matter where you are, listen, do you think I wanted to come in here screaming for 15 minutes straight enough? I don't know why you did. You don't know why I did? Because it's 111 degrees in here right now. It's 111

degrees right here right now. That's why. That's why. It's why people get shot in the middle of July. Because it's hot in my apartment. No, because it's hot everywhere. When I'm not supposed to be functioning in this shit. Well, you're just from the coldest place on earth.

So anything outside of that is a nightmare to you. No, no, no. This is like nice weather, dude. This is nice weather. This is lovely. I'm from Florida. This is fucking great outside. It's not bad outside.

Yeah, I'm not talking about outside. When's the last time? You're acting like you're sitting on the beach, getting a cool breeze. You're getting Florida on this fucking couch right now. This is fine temperature for me. Oh, I'm okay right out He doesn't even have an AC in his room. Isn't that insane?

How do you do? Are you people reptiles? What the fuck is wrong with you? You got a lamp in there and a heating rock? Yeah, he just sits on a fucking rock naked with the sun on a lamp. Every month, Michael has to peel his skin. Bro, it is hot in here, dude. Dude, we should have gotten a fourth mic.

That would have been fun. Yeah. Well, sorry. Just picture what I would say. Plug it in. Now, I don't know. I don't think we have the resources around it. Actually, I don't, I think it might take exactly four seconds.

We might just do it. You want to. Just do it. You want to hop on? Yeah. Yeah. Dude, we'll grab it. I'll my producer edit around this real quick.

All right. All right. We're back. We had to edit in. Now we got, that's really what it is. Uh, we'll blur the name, whatever, whatever. We'll figure it out. We got somebody else on the fucking podcast.

And, uh, yeah. Yeah. Shut up, dude. And we're talking about the Guardian Angels. Morning good fans know me is mystery guests. Yeah. Yeah. Wait, wait, so the Guardian Angels, they're like the vigilante group, right?

Kind of, yeah. Yeah, you know. They're like, they're like, they should wear like Ninja Turtle masks also in a different way. They sort of do. Yeah, exactly. They're already dressed up. That's their biggest problem. You're right.

If they change their uniform, people would think differently of them. So you think people, what do people think of them is like dweebbs? Yeah. Yeah, it is kind of like hall monitor vibe. Yeah. They dress like they work at like a shrine is. You know what I mean? That's what they dress like.

Should be driving around on a little tiny cars. But if they got a little more sleek and a little better than it would have been, you know, it would have been like better off, you know. Yeah, they should just wear like. Like if they upgrade. It would be like air marshals. Just wearing regular fucking clothes. Oh, that's even better. And then everybody's like, ooh.

They should dress like old people. This guy could be. You're kind of right. Do you think they ever do that? Like air marshals dress like old ladies or like Medea or something like that? They can just surprise. They definitely used to do that. Remember, they used to be one on every single airplane.

No, no, no, no. I was actually listening to old ONA. It was really funny because this guy was like, Patrice was talking about the funniest shit. He would purposely bring weapons on airplanes just to see how effective TSA is. So he's like, yeah, I just try. Like a gun?

No, like screwdriver, stuff like that. And then an air marshal calls and he's like, we're going to fucking, we're going to take you out on this. He goes, well, how many of you guys, are you guys on every single? flight, he's like, I can't answer that question. He's like, oh, so you're not? Because you would say we're on every flight if you were.

So they like, it's kind of like, you remember when the joke that came out? Yeah, obviously now that you say that they, like anyway. Why wouldn't you just say yes anyway? Yeah, because they're stupid. Yeah. A bunch of stupid fucking idiots. All right. What are you guys to defend? No, no, no, no, no. I hate Aramarsh. This is an anti,

this is, we've already decided this is anti-god, pro-cuck. Not me. We're taking the worst positions on everything on this podcast. Air marshals are bad people. The worst positions, aka how Michael Good really feels. Yeah, no,

this is a pro- Kyle Rittenhouse, uh, anti, uh, what ever happen to him? Fuck him, dude.

What the fuck happening? He's getting pussy, dude. He endorsed, Rand Paul. Yeah, yeah, endorsed Rand Paul.

And then he gives a shit who that he can. Then he reverses his stance after a Trump supporter's shit on him. Oh, really? He's back on Trump train. Why does anyone give a fuck what he thinks?

I don't know. He killed someone. He killed a couple I get, but I'm saying about what he thinks. That was like five years ago. Yeah, I don't know. He's looked into the face of death. Yeah.

Fortunately not. Yeah, there's no way. Do you think he's still, do you think when you kill somebody like that, you think you still feel bad, or do you think you justify it enough in your head that you're just fine? Obviously, yeah, obviously justified it.

Yeah. But I'm saying like, do you think it haunts him at all ever? I mean, didn't the guy he kill? Like, wasn't one of them, like, a sexual predator? By chance. And then the other one? Yeah.

Luckily for him. Yeah, I know. But that definitely weighs different. It's not like he has to, it's not like every day he has to drive by a fire station and like look at the memorial of the great individual he murdered.

He killed a sex offender. That's true. So it's like three random people he didn't. Yeah, but I think what, and then the other would haunt me. Yeah. I mean, he's, he's a fucking Instagram character.

It obviously isn't bothering him that bad. That is true. You're just talking about who he's endorsing. Like the fact people listen to what he does, it's like he could probably throw that energy onto something else. I mean, if I went to prison for murder, I would do, I would endorse. I don't think he went to prison though.

Pretty publicly. I know, but I'm saying if I was like a convicted murder. Yeah, but no one would listen to you. That's the thing. Yeah, but I would just do it. Yeah. Because people from the news would still want to talk to me for some reason. So I would just be like, if I would kill. If I killed somebody, I would then plant child pornography in their house. And then everybody would be like, yeah, because isn't that kind of what happened with Kyle right now?

Or was it a self-defense thing? No, he's a dickhead. because he's a dweeb. Like you said, he didn't know who was. Like, he, he's a dickhead because, like, he went for that. Now, it's a good thing he killed a sex. If, if, I, correct me if I'm wrong. If this is, you know, but I remember it the

people he killed, two or three people, weren't they all awful people? Like, legitimately, weren't they like, I mean, clearly they weren't good people that's burning the city down. Pedify. There's no way. He just, by chance, killed three. Look it up. I'm telling, I think one of them was at least. Yeah, one of, one of them

had some shit. I don't know about the other two. I think the, the justification was the other two were shooting at him first or some shit. Yeah, everyone was up there. They're burning the city down. Every single person who's willingly going outside when a city's being burned down as a dickhead.

That's just how that is. Yeah. You're not going to defend Kyle Rittenhouse. No, me neither. Well, then you can get off my fucking podcast. Yeah. This is the, get the fuck out of it. This is the pro-cuck.

Yeah. No. Anti-God. Uh, pro-Ritton Hous. please. Vegan. This is a vegan podcast. I got my World Wildlife Foundation share.

I represent for the WWF. That's not bad. All right. Yeah, yeah, vegan. I'm a donor. You know, I'd wish to send me some more shit with the amount I fucking give them. But you know what? Nevertheless.

Pro Jar Jar Jor Binks. What else do people hate? I like Georgia Bix. Yeah, I don't mind Jodgian Bings. Oh, okay. Well, a lot of people hate him. I don't know. He got like the guy got like death threats, didn't he?

I mean, people just like Star Wars too much. Yeah. Yeah. They don't like a new goofy guy. but they're all goofy. Yeah. I could really picture Chabaca commuting to work every day for a nine to five.

Yeah, that does. It does make you a fucking loser. If you're like, no way. Like, you're just, you're looking at Chubakka and you're like, this is what it's about. George Javings really upended like the gritty dark. Yeah. First three.

Yeah. Of Obi-1, Kenobi. Used to be like just noir grit, you know. Like the real story of a. I loved him when I was a kid because I remember I'm saying, excuse me? I was like, that's a funny thing to say. I'm saying every time I walk by people. It's funny. Even for an alien, he is a funny

voice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that. Other aliens are like why do you sound like that? Star Wars episode one, that one with Jajop things. I like that movie a lot. Yeah, I never got into any of them. I don't know. I don't like world building stuff. They're great kids movies. They're great kids. I'm a big Star Wars guy. Yeah, they're a great kid. I'm surprised

you're not a Star Wars guy. No, no. The amount you love Batman and shit. Yeah, Batman's a big world. Yeah, but I'm just like a fucking... It is sort of... It's only contained in a city, I guess. Yeah, it's only contained in a city.

It's a little more reality. It's not like you're like... Okay. Too face? That's funny to you? That's fucking funny. Poison Ivy? Very real.

Newsflash, Michael. Space is real. Yeah, but it's like... It's not like Commissioner Gordon's like... It's not like Commissioner Gordon has some weird super power with dick is like a magnet or something. Okay, Clayface is, Clay, there's, Clayvich should not exist. Some dickheads running around dressed up in a Halloween costume.

Yeah, it's a lot more realistic than Star Wars. I mean, he's basically, uh, whatever the fuck, Guardian Angel. Yeah, exactly. It's very, having you seen the new one is like, all of that could happen. Yeah, the Guardian Angels on driving a hundred. What do you look at? You know what? You know how you know Batman's bullshit?

You know how you know Batman's bullshit? He's never hit traffic once in his life. Every time he's driving on a hundred. What are you talking about? And the new one, he drives over cars. And the new one, he has. I don't want. I grown out of that shit. Yeah, why? Were you in the movie theater? Like, it's too hot in here.

It's 100 degrees. No, no, no, no. I'm just saying, I take it for what it is. I like Batman. That movie, The Doc Night, Batman Doc Night, I think that's one of the best movies ever. Yeah, that's, but as far as it be realistic. You're on this podcast, we have bad takes. That's the worst movie ever. Batman and Robin with Arnold Schwarzenegger. No, the Batman TV show from the 60s. I'm not, I'm not, I can't even say that guy's name without somebody making an N-word Joe. Batman and Robin from the 1960s is like literally one of the best shows ever.

You know what I like about Batman? Very silly. Awesome. I like how like the world they built in Batman. You can suck the biggest fucking cock you could buy. You could go out there. I like how it's like a whole. Just search the whole entire city. It's like a universe. Honest the world they built. I want you. Like multiple worlds. I'm going to hold a cop. Yeah. Actually, you know, I'm

Instagram friends with the guy with the biggest penis in the world. I'm going to have him come over here and you could suck his fucking cock. You can suck Jonah Falcon's cock. I mean, maybe the biggest one. What's up? That's not a gayer straight. That's just special. Yeah, yeah, that is true.

That's a Guinness World Record. Yeah, yeah. It's not bad at all. Yeah, I've sucked. I'm not gay, but I have sucked the biggest dick on the world. I wouldn't you? That says nothing about my sexuality. You ever, you ever like open your mouth too wide and it like hurts really bad?

That probably happens when you suck a dick that. But what do you? I'm waiting for Ryan to fucking fuck. I didn't say that. No, no, I'm waiting for you. I didn't say, cut out the gay shit. Ryan's the girth master over here. Always texting you about his girth.

I didn't say anything. Is that true? You're texting about how girthy your dick is? I mean, come on. Come on. You guys are reporting what you read in the bathrooms. That was bashful.

I could pull up every text. If I went on the messages app and typed a girth, it would be like 400 messages. I'm all girth, brough. Woke up girth this morning. morning. 100% whole milk drinker over here. You know what I mean?

I am literally lying here, sweating, bro. I'm not even, I'm so used to this apartment. This is like a good day. How are you guys all wearing pants right now, dude? Always wear pants. Yeah, I do want to start being a shorts guy again. I can't. You're like a board shorts guy.

Yeah, I am a board shorts guy. The problem is I never wear shorts. I wear shorts when I like go on like a long walk. You can't. You will all wear shorts. I look so fucking strange. You look like a fucking pedophile camp counts. Yeah, because he looks perfectly normal right now dressed in all black wearing a pair of sunglasses, drinking booze out of a water bottle.

You have the worst judge of character I've ever seen on my entire life. What do you think I want to have a bunch of moral people on this? I'm not saying that. I'm not, to say he would look weird wearing shorts. Why would he look weird? Look how fucking white. Yeah, dude, this is. No, you can't be weird.

This guy's got to go. Yeah, but you have the accent. Like, it's okay. You're not whiter than I am. The only thing whiter than you is your last name. I am wider than you, bro. Yeah, that's because you put pants. on.

Yeah. Why don't you like long socks to cut? That's, I don't. No, I would look like,

I usually wear long socks. He would look like, like an adult. He looked like he's trying to be like a troop leader of like a, I don't know, I wouldn't like that. I don't know why you in shorts really unsettles me. I've come to Bay Ridge,

buddy. You'll see me in shorts. I think I'm going to avoid that with everything in my heart. Yeah, no. That really bothers me. Even if it's like 105 degrees, you wear jeans?

At night, yeah. During the day, if I'm, going on a walk or whatever the fuck getting groceries, I'll wear shorts The problem I realize is I wear shorts to the gym That's like the only time I wear shorts

And I don't always wear like compression shorts So I realize my balls are just like Out for everybody Who gives a fuck? You know what I mean? You got broads walking around. No one wears bras anymore I mean you could show you practically show your Cork just walking around anyways like no way you know you get a look

But it's like you gotta be comfortable I gotta show my penis to everybody I just my balls off Ryan is the most comfortable person I've ever interacted with. This city's disgusting. This city's gross, dude. I will say this. Boston is clean as fuck.

Boston's not bad. What do you mean? No, it's, there's parts of it that are pretty dirty. No, but for the most part, it's like a very clean city. If you compare any other, most other large metropolitan cities

to the shithole of New York City, then yes, it's going to seem clean. This place is fucking filthy and disgusting. So what do we do about it? What are you going to do? What am I going to do? I don't know.

What are I going to do? They, I don't know. You're a big Eric Adams guy, right? No, I'm not. Really? I thought you liked him. Because he's a fucking dick. What do you mean?

Why? I said, I thought you liked him. No. No, no, I don't. You're the Blasio guy. No. Not at all. Yeah, actually, I missed the Blasio.

I kind of missed that guy, you know? He died as he had black. I saw him on the street. He, like, he has, like, died black. I got to go say what's up to De Blasio. I was like, Billy! And he just fucking just, like, kept walking, dude, you know? That's so funny.

Because you know his whole thing is he is German, but he's trying to be Italian. It's funny that he's now dying his hair black to look more Italian and less German. He's a fucking bought and sole politician. Why would that surprise you? No, it's just funny that like he's still like... Like you said, his name's not even Bill de Blasio. Yeah, yeah. What is it, Warner Wilhelm?

Something crazy, yeah. Yeah. I shouldn't say crazy, but it's just not... Nazi boy, Jr. No, no, no. He didn't do it because of that. He just wanted to like sound cool. He mocked himself.

No, no, no, no. Well, he wanted to mark himself to Italians and Jewish people. So he could not have a Sherman name. because Italians don't care and Jewish people are not going to be hyped on that. It is cool that we went from like, he's like such a nerd. And now the mayor is like...

Dude, he kind of rocks. A mayor doesn't give a fuck. Eric Adam was a caravan. He was a nerd. He was a fucking nerd. He's like 6'5 and wider than a fucking horse. That makes him not a nerd just because he's tall. I think he was a nerd.

I think he was a moron, but I wouldn't say he was a nerd. He wasn't a nerd like Bloomberg was. You remember the fucking burgers video where he's like, you guys got to get vaccinated. You get a free cheeseburger. He's like eating. Yeah, yeah. So good.

And fries. I mean, come on, Cash what are you? Can't even eat a fucking cheeseburger. Like, there could not be more

talking to adults like their babies. You're like, and you guys get a special action figure too if you guys get back to me. That's all, all this shit is. Bloomberg wasn't a nerd.

He was just such a rich guy that he like didn't, he like, no one could relate to him. Yeah, but he was like an old version of a nerd though. I get,

but a nerd and just like a completely disconnected from regular people. Oh, without a doubt. Without a doubt. Without a doubt. he's trying to appeal to people that just didn't work

because he's not cool. You certainly, yeah, you're not wrong about that. But Eric Adams is cool because he doesn't... No, he's... Eric Adams is cool? Oh, get the fuck out of him.

He doesn't even care that everyone... He was a cop for 25 years and he wasn't even a cool cop. I think you can be a cool cop. I do too, but he wasn't one. What made him not cool cop? Do you listen to him talk? Yeah, maybe I'm just projecting a cool black guy voice on him,

but isn't he like, yeah, America is... Shit, bro. New York City. I wish he talked like that. I wish he talked. Yo, what's up? This Eric Adams, how y'all doing today? It's how he sounded me.

I'm Eric Adams. Did you see that one Eric Adams video where, like, a reporter's asking him about some shit, like some scandal he was embroiled in as he's walking past them? And they're like, Eric, how do you respond to the blood of allegations, whatever? And he's like, I love New York. New York. That is what.

He does have a deeper voice, right? I think he does have a deeper voice. a deeper boy. He was kind of like I love the little. No, he does have a deep voice, but he's not like, I would never think of that guy is cool. Oh, I think him as fucking cool as hell. Yeah, I don't know. I can't help but think black guys are cooler. Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah. Yeah. Okay, but there's still lame-ass black dudes. You don't think Eric Adams ain't a fucking lame? No, dude. He's got that, he's got that boy. Eric Adams. Yeah, he's like, what's so? I think he's a fucking retit. He's a fucking terrible

mayor, but he's a retire. He's a real. Bro, he tries to be cool. He tries to be cool. He's like, He has like four Giotos on his shit and stuff. Like he tries to be cool, but he's like not actually cool. I think the fact he doesn't really care makes him cool. I think he does care, though. I really don't think he cares. I think he does. He's like not a little bit of a man.

I think he's such an incompetent war on. He's been bought and sold so many fucking times now. Like he, he realized he can't do nothing. But I think he did care. Because he was a cop for 25 years. He certainly did care. I just think he's very ingenuous with everything he said. But I feel like,

I'll let Eric Adams from here. He cares. Yeah. Oh, please. All good blood. I'm picturing. Yeah, I have a very cool image of Eric Adams in my head. I'm going to go to bed thinking about it.

I have a very nice. I don't, I mean, we've been having a different conversation. Yeah. I just hear you behind me like, yeah. Entire.

Yeah. Literally entirely. That's so true. I'm like, and I'm like almost on top of you. So I'm like basically in Jake's ear. Just be like, yeah,

what's up? What's up, man? I'm out of my shoulders. Eric Adams and Bill de Blasio. Oh, yeah. Eric Adams is like, oh, just don't give a fuck. Bill de Blasio's like,

you should have a burger. Enjoy a burger. You guys get vaccinated. I'll give you a sticker. Which is the one that raised the prices on sodas? They've all done it. They've all done it? Go buy a fucking dozen eggs.

They're like $9. Yeah, New York is a big vice tax fucking voice. They've all done it. I felt like there was, one guy that was like, okay, if you're buying a liter of soda, that was the Blasio. No, the Blasio did, if it was like the 20 ounce,

you had to pay like an additional tax. When Bloomberg started that, though. They've all done that, but they've all fucked, they've all done that bullshit. Because you got to appease to these climate change retards out here that somehow think like using a plastic bottle is like... You know what somebody too? Because I immediately, I get, whenever I go in something's expensive,

I immediately go these fucking assholes of this but it's not them. It's not even their fault. No. They try telling you you can't have a fucking straw. Why the fuck can't I have a straw? Who's telling you you can't have a straw? It's so funny. He's very a wild life. 100%. You can't use a fucking straw.

Well, yeah, because they're giving you a plastic cup, a plastic lid, but won't give you a plastic straw. The lid in the cup itself is already like literally 50 times more plastic than a fucking straw. Literally, literally, and literally. I didn't want to stop. think about that, right?

Yeah. I think you're actually a fucking retortment. That's what I think. That's what I think. That's what I think. That's what I think. So learn how to use the word correctly.

Well, it was a joke because lid and litter, both there's two puns in there. I'm going to kill myself. Anyways. The fucking, what's it called? Like, you know,

a lot of the straw stuff is, it's just, it's like propaganda by companies that use more oil. Of course it is. Yeah, one woman explained that to me and I was like that made so much sense. I was on a date with this woman. There's one time

I told her I'd be like, I was like, I fully do not care about the environment. You were on a date with a woman? Oh my God. I know. Why don't you care about the environment? It's great. It doesn't. I'm not saying this. If somebody was like, this will be better for the environment, we'll save money being better for the environment. I would choose the option that helps the environment. But I don't have an emotional care about the environment. I don't give a fuck about the environment. I will do stuff that would make a difference. If you go, okay, you sign this bill, you'll lose more money, but it'll be better for the environment. I'll go, okay, I would make that choice to better the environment.

Yeah, but see, that's how they, that doesn't mean you give a, yeah, I see what I don't. I don't give a fuck about the environment. It's unfortunate. I don't, because we all have to live here. I don't, I just don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, now, now I would sign things to help these things. I think there are a problem, but I'm saying, I'm sure you'd put a lot of thought into it, too.

Yeah. I'm just not emotionally invested in those things. This is the worst take podcast. You were not lying. I'm just saying an emotional investment. Like, everybody lies and pretends. have an emotional investment in so many things they don't have an actual... Yeah, but not everybody, just because politicians...

You step and out and you're like, oh, the environment, it's destroyed. Like, you don't actually... That's not how I assess my feelings. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no way. You get... Every feeling. Yeah, then you don't... Then you don't care.

If you're not angry about it, then you don't care. What are you talking about? You're fake caring. I... You know, you care about... You think it's anger. You think the only, the only emotion you could have to have something is anger. If you care about it, yeah.

That's great. Then you should seek anger management if that's the... I should seek anger management. The guy's been screaming in my house for 35 minutes now. You're telling me, the only way you can react to a situation is the only way you care about something is if you get angry, not anything else. So nothing makes you feel happy then? If you genuinely care about something, you would get angry about at some point.

Yeah, everything I've cared about, I've been angry about at some point. For sure, when something bad happens to something I care about, yes. Sure. So if something's bad happening in the environment, you would be angry about it if you actually cared about the environment. Yes. You actually cared about the war in the Middle East. You would be angry about the war in the Middle East.

Rightfully, yes. Right. I have not had those physical response. I said, Oh, I know. I go, that's really fucked up. And, like, if I could do something to fix this, then I would be interested in that.

If somebody's like, this candidate. But that's why you never, you'll never fix it, though, because you don't care. So, like, you're disqualified from it. Yes. But most people pretend to care about all these things. Yeah, but that's just because they want pussy or they want to get, like, some kind of, like,

street credit or something. Totally. Yeah, well, they want street pussy. Yeah, that's... Actually, you don't really need to lie if you want to get street pussy. Well, some people do. I think a lot of people A cop does.

That's how they get arrest. What's up? A lot of people do care about it. Shut up, you fucking pussy. I'm scared. Allow me to be devil's advocate. Yeah. But back to the point, though.

Adams de Blasio and they've all done dumb shit. Yeah, yeah. They've all done dumb shit. Well, I'm saying this is you've yelled about the temperature. So clearly you care about the temperature. Like, I don't think there's a situation where people, I think people just fake caring more than they do. Yeah, some people do, but not.

everybody. What's up? Obviously, yeah, some people because everybody says this, they go, yeah, I care about, you know, like pedophiles, they're terrible. It's like, well,

what are you done to stop? You've done nothing to stop it. So can you really care about something? You've done zero things. You're lying about sharing. Yeah, because you don't want it around you. Like, that's a thing. Like, I've never done anything

to actively stop a pedophile, but I don't want that shit around me. If they ever tried moving next door in my building of some shit, like I'd be like this is not happening. Right, but you don't really care because you haven't done anything to fix it. If you haven't done it,

What are we supposed to do to fix it? Yeah, 100%. Make the kids get older? Yeah. You have a gun that ages kids. Yeah. Well, say, like, this is, I'm speaking very hyperbolicly when I say I don't care about things. Because obviously I do care, but I'm saying really caring means you actually do something to change the thing.

Because if you had a problem in your life and you didn't do anything about it, people would say you don't care about that problem. If, for example, I have shoes with holes in them, it's fair to say, I don't care about the holes in my shoes because I haven't done anything to fix the holes in my shoes. So people say they care about these issues and go, what have you done to fix them? Nothing. That means you don't care about. it really. Is there a difference between caring and being lazy? You're lazy if you don't

yeah, you're being lazy, you don't care about something if you're being, that's interesting, okay. Because you should get new shoes. Okay, you know what? You know what? You know what? I could care about getting fat, but not do anything about it. There you go. So, yeah, I guess listen, that's all the guilt. All your fat is your guilt of not

caring about the Middle East. Yeah, maybe. environment. Yeah, by the way, I'm not saying I don't care about the Middle East. Those kids could go die. Fuck them. I hope they burn a lie. That's not what I'm saying.

I'm not going to pretend like that. You got your own shit to deal with, you know? Oh, it's not hard at all, dude. It really is not hard to put a little bit of effort into fix world problems. But I have not that. Shut the fuck up. What?

Shut the fuck up right now. I swear to God, I'll take this camera and break it right right through that fucking television. After you just sat here and. lecture us on how you don't give a shit about the fucking environment at all and you don't care about the Middle East, you're going to sit here and tell him

that it doesn't take a lot to fucking change all the world's problems right now. It doesn't take a lot? Are you kidding me? You're not listening to me. I didn't say it... No, you're not listening to yourself. It doesn't take a lot. Okay, yeah, go tell that to fucking Netanyahu and

fucking whatever else is going on over there. Tell them, hey, it doesn't take a lot. You didn't hear at all what I said. I said, I said, it wouldn't take a lot for me to try to make a change as I could contribute to these scenes. Do you think I said I could fix the Middle East or Global Warrants? No, no. You have no right

to fucking say that because you're walking around saying, you walk around with holes in your fucking shoes. No one gives a fuck with you. Of course you're not going to do anything. Fellas, you're, consider this. You didn't listen to what I said at all. Consider this. No, you're not hearing anything.

Yeah, yeah. You guys speak loudly to be on this podcast, Jake. If everyone does a little, that it adds up to a lot. You're a fucking pussy, as I said earlier here. I regret letting you on this. Do you get what I'm saying? No, I don't.

Yeah, because you completely deserve you. What I was saying, by the way, is I was saying it wouldn't take that much for me to try to make a difference. It wouldn't take that much for me to put effort into fixing these problems, to donate two dollars. Yeah, but you said all the world's issues

can be fixed with not a lot of effort. That's what you said. I didn't say that once. Yes, you did. I definitely did not say that once. Yes, you did. Hey, we'll play back the tape. I guarantee you I did not say that.

We'll play back the tape. Can we get a water for Ryan or something? Or a drink or another bit. We just had a guest to walk out of the podcast. Mystery has. Can you say you blame him? Oof, he's gone. What a fucking bitch.

You know, maybe if everybody does a little bit, we can fix out of the problems. Do you want to switch sunglasses right now? I don't know, I like these Why do you want to wear these? I kind of want to wear them Put them on Are we all gonna throw I got these ones on

These are the ones that flip up Oh my god Those are like baseball sunglasses I like those ones Yeah I'm wearing these The fucking BBW Striptacular With the Jojo Peaches

Are those regular glasses too? Dude If you actually go to that Are those prescription I'm gonna be jealous If I go Would you go to the BBW Stripatcul there? No, no. What's that? Fat girls getting naked? Yeah, yeah. Well, that's, that's what you would call it if you didn't have, you know, taste and yeah. No, where is it? It's, uh, the location's disclosed until the day of, you know what, I'll tell you what I'd tell you. The people who don't listen. I saw a flyer online. It's a big fat, uh, I don't know, maybe Hispanic, maybe black woman. I don't know. That was a boy. She's hot. She's fucking hot. It said, uh, BBW, striptacular, meet and greet with Jo Jo Peach. Who's that?

she's the woman I just described. Oh. Yeah, yeah. But. She's a big, beautiful woman. Yeah, I love fat chicks. There's nothing. She's a black chick?

Yeah, yeah. And what she's having a... No, no, no. It is a stripper party. So, yeah. Yeah, but how many of them are going to be there? But it's only thick bitches. Yeah, how many of them is going to be there?

Uh, they should have that on the flyer. Yeah, yeah. No, it's going to be a lot. So in Daytona, they do BVW, like, weekend. Are you serious? That's fucking awesome, dude. You were saying this like a guy who cares about like a convention in town for butterflies. Like you're excited about this. Listen, it's something to study.

And like I said to you in the DMs, if I were single, yeah, I would go. Do a lot of people go? Does it bring people to town? Yes. Really? Lots of guys. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's going to be way more guys than ladies in that. Right, right. Now, how many white guys do you think are going to be there?

A decent amount, I'm sure. Damn, and I thought I was going on. Now, will they have fades? Yes. Will you fit in? No. Not at all. What if I get rode up again?

Is it like all the bars are packed and everyone knows it's going on? Yeah, sure. It's BBW, so you only need 40 of them to pack it out. No, I mean. So we're at capacity fellas. So like the three of these. Can you guys suck it in? But does everyone like know it's going on?

Yes. Really? Yeah. Have you been? I'm so mad I just heard this. Do you know what time of year it is? It's what? What time of year?

Winter's a good idea. Don't do that in the summer. Like what month is it? Yeah. You're doing the sun. What month is it? So. Daytona, it doesn't matter.

It's going to be hot no matter what. Yeah, yeah. January is probably a good time to have BBW there. What's the temperature like in January, though? Like 70, 80? Yeah, some days. That's a good day. Yeah, yeah.

You think it gets more? You think 90 in January? Maybe not 90, but, you know, you get upper 80s and everything. That's like the average. You'd say upro 80s in fucking December. And fucking Florida? Yeah.

It stinks. That's sick. Yeah. What's it like right now, 105? No, it's probably like 90. All right, so it's coming back, by the way. I thought you were... You're going to love this.

We're talking about the BBW Stripacular. Oh, shit. Jojo Peaches. Jojo Peaches. Yeah. He was saying Daytona has a BBW weekend. Yep. Yeah.

You got to go to FLA. Dude, me on a fucking motorcycle in between two fat chicks. Like one on the front, one on the bag, that sounds like a phenomenal time. It sounds like a big motorcycle. Yeah, yeah, it is. It's one of those. ones at the 18 wheel

wheel. You need to go to Orange County to get that thing customized. I'm 100%. I'm a hundred percent. I am freight bearing sidecars. Oh, wait. That would also be sick of me.

I'm in the little sidecars. With goggles and then just some huge fat shit with giant cars. It's you and me and two sidecars. Motorcycle driven by Jojo Peach is herself. Oh, fuck yeah, dude. Oh, my God.

I'm getting piggyback rides around town, dude. That would be sick as I'm very attracted to fat chicks. The funniest thing about that. 100% yeah. Me and this guy, we connect on that.

Yes. The funniest thing about that fly is the the rep your flag thing. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, just to bring like the flag

of your country. Yeah. Oh, really? Stripacular. Yeah, yeah. That's crazy.

Like it's the Olympics. Dude, I should definitely, yeah. I can't do an Irish flag. I want to see this fucking thing. Dude, it's on my Instagram story.

Yeah. I'll look at it after. Yeah, I think, uh, It's funny because I looked up the location that's supposed to be undisclosed, and it's like directly next to a preschool. Yeah?

And where is it? So this is, this is, uh, Jojo Peaches. Oh, I don't know if she's black. No,

she's fucking, let me see her. Let me see Jojo Peaches. She looks like Puerto Rican or something. She is hot, dude. Let me, I don't know if I have enough dick to have sex with that woman.

You do. Don't worry about it. Let me see it. Thank you, I'm not, I'm not giving you my fucking. No, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no. I gave this guy my fucking phone one time. No, no, no, no. I wanted to see where the location. I'm not doing this. I'm not doing this. Then tell me where it is.

I'm just asking a question. Where is it? Is it in New York? It's undisclosed. I don't know where the location is. It's undisclosed. And how the fucking people are supposed to know where it is? Michael Good.

You find out the day of if you bought a ticket. Yeah, but what if you're not like, what if you're in a different state? Like, is it in New York? Yes, it's in New York. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yes. How do you know it's in New York? Because it's on the flight.

you're not going to get my phone. This motherfucker... You think I want... God knows what you're looking at on your fucking phone. You think I want to touch your cell phone? Are you fucking kidding me right now? This guy...

I said I want to see your phone. You see with your eyes. You touch with your hands. I don't want to touch your phone. We're going to listen back to what I said. What you said? For me about saying I can fix the world problem with $2.

That's not what I said. But that made Jake leave last time, so we're not bringing that. What did you say? What were you saying about this undisclosed location thing or whatever? No, no, no.

it looks like when you click on it, it looks like it's next to a preschool. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. Probably is. Yeah. Dude. Oh, man. I don't know.

Sorry, I'm getting too horny, guys. Let's move on. I'm talking about Fetch. That's weird. What are you looking up right now? I'm looking up Jojo Peaches. I'm trying to... Are you just watching porn right now on the podcast?

You have sunglasses on. We can see the reflection. Yeah, he's typing it in. I'm finding her actual name. I want to go to it. I want to take a picture with Jojo Peaches and me just shaking her hands. How much of the ticket? Yeah, like you're meeting like a...

president. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they just say something like the nation's... With like a backdrop or something. Yeah, yeah. I just think the nation's been more to never been more divided.

Yeah, you should do that. You should do that. You should fucking do that, actually. How much of the tickets? 20 bucks, dude. Oh, really? You should definitely do that. I'm 100% doing.

Yeah, do it. Just take the picture. It is going to be funny when I take... Yeah. I was going to go Levi. Levi. Levi. Levi.

Evy. Don't be tempted. This man is tempted. Oh, no, I'm not going to go, but, you know. You want me to tell you if you want to stiff my fingers afterwards? When is it? When is it? It's like a Labor Day spectacular.

So it's a awkward. That's a few. Okay. I didn't know if it was like today or tomorrow. Yeah, let's see. Two hour, two hour meat and greet. What's up? You got like a buffet or something?

I mean, what you think? I mean, come on. It's a BVW convention. Come on. Yeah. Come on, young man. Yeah, yeah. They're doing a food.

I'm hungry. Yeah, yeah. Wait, should I go door to door? Come out. They go, Sue. BBW Striptacular

and Chili cookoff. Can I please go door to door and do a food drive for the BBW staccatular? Do it. These thick bitches, look, they got to shake their booties.

We don't want to see thin asses here. He just, you just bring like, you just show up like 68 cans of bushes baked beans. She just beer bongs at all.

Oh, just that girl, you showed me the pictures, eating baked beans while she's meeting people, dude. Oh, yeah, she's got just a can of beans while, like, taking pictures. See how big she was. Does she do anything except eat? Holy shit, dude. But I'm so into it. Like, yeah, I like, like, really?

So funny to show it with food like that. Have you ever banged the girl like that? Absolutely. Really? That, as big as that girl just was? Dude, I think so, man. That girl took up the whole fucking cell phone screen. Close to this big, not quite this big.

That girl's huge. That girl looks like a modified animal. Like, she clearly goes for that. Like, so she is kind of like modified animal. She does. She's clearly aiming for that. Alex Jones is talking about this. He's like, they're making the BBWs in lab.

They're thicker than ever. Their booties are bigger than they've ever been. Because her face was pretty. She's fucking hot. Her face was pretty. That's gross. I don't like that. I looked it up.

Argentina. Argentinian, okay. Nice. What else are they known for? Soccer. Yeah. They just won the World Cup. And Copa. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Lionel Messi, you don't know messy? Yeah. Is he like a big fat girl? Yeah. The only thing I understand is BBW is Spectaculars. It's a great word, too. It's like, it's spectacular.

It's like a kid's magic show he's putting on it. He's like, it's stryptacular. He's like a carnival, like a... Everybody come out to see the BBW's triptacular. Twisted ringmaster. Welcome. These are the thickest bitches in the world. Step right up.

Yeah, that is... I've always wanted to go to like a... Yeah, no, you guys just can get grossed out by saying that. I'm going to move on. Say it. I like Bush. I don't know if there's any strip gloves. We're just chicks with bushes.

Like just a... It would be called bushes probably, but don't get disgusted. I think most strip clothes are they got girls or they got men, you know? Yeah, you don't really get Bush. It's like, that's really specific. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah. Would they have to wear hairnets on them or something?

I know, like it's a fucking health code violation. Only if they work in like the kitchen problem. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you like a strip club guy? Yes, 100%. I don't even ask that question. Yeah, come on. I'm not at all.

Yeah, of course, of course. You need them. Again, again. Yeah, you're sitting on a rock with a light above you kind of guy. with a light above me. Yeah. The lizard thing. Oh, yeah.

Way before. Yeah, yeah. Dude, Ryan has a boner right now. It looks like it doesn't. I knew when I would. Look at that girthy bonner. We're talking about BBW spectacular.

Automatic. Automatic. I know, dude. I know I could just put this here. Automatic. Yeah. No, I am a big. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I like strip folks. What's the appeal? I think it's just fun. I like getting drunk. It's one of the funest environments to be drunk. I think they tolerate retardation at a level that most places do not. Yeah, sure. I hear that. I understand that side

about like going to like a shitty strip club, especially, like, they could be a really good time. Well, I think what happens is, like, people either don't like it for two reasons. People are either like, it's sad, which are sad. Actually, to be fair, that Hungarian girl I was talking about, she's like, all of these strip clubs in Hungary are sad. And I'm like, well, that, that makes sense. Hungary is sad.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was the funniest. You were there at the pair, right? I was there. I was a part of the conversation. This beautiful woman though. Yeah, yeah. Not a BBW, I'll tell you that much. What's up? Not a BBW.

Not a BBW. Not a BBW. She was curvy though. Yeah, yeah, she was really cute. But I was talking to her and her brother. I was buying all of her friends drinks because I was like, oh, this is how I'll get in here. This is how I'm paying for sex right now. It's her brother. And he's like, uh, no, can you pass me the ones in the fridge now?

No. No. Any other booze in there? But it was very funny because her, is there any other booze in there? No, you want to split this with me? Sure. Her brother goes, he goes, oh, my gosh, everybody in America is so nice. He goes, everybody says you go out to America and people will hang out with you a bar, buy you drink.

I guess it's true. And I'm like, I'm just trying to fuck your sister. I have not. Look, I'm a nice guy. I had no idea that they weren't American. When I saw them, I was like, oh, that's a beautiful American woman perfect for Michael Good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, and I'm usually not attracted to four women, but I was like, she's, they sound lost.

they sound confused. Because they are. They're in a different country. Yeah, I feel like I'm taking advantage a little bit, but she was like kind of, I wonder if she doesn't. She follows me on it. And she anyways, whatever, who cares? If her brother's listening, then, yes, I was trying to have sex with your sister.

Anyways, it was funny too, because like somebody was talking to her other sister. And she was like, yeah, I am 24, but she is 17. And immediately I was like, hey, bud, bye, bud, bud, over here. I had to like tell the boss. I was like, that girl said, and they were like, oh, I wasn't even. trying to fuck her. But then it's so funny, she's like, in the Meta-Card, you guys care so much about age. And I'm like, yes, we do.

It's terrifying. Yeah, yeah, we're not trying to go to jail here or do morally reprehensible things. I think people actually do that, though. Yeah, yeah. And what are you doing to stop it? What are you doing to fucking nothing to stop it? I don't allow that. That's what it is. Well, this has been a

fucking crazy week as it is. This is completely me injecting this for no reason, but I went to kill Tony. I haven't even talked about that. Oh, yeah. How was it? Dude, it was the best comedy show. I've seen my whole dare life. Really? That's crazy. Come on. I'm serious. Well, because of the special guests and shit.

No, I liked the open micers doing one minute. That was where they made it the best. Yeah, I was sick. No, well, it was like, you go to Massachusetts Square Garden. I mean, clearly it's sick. My stomach drops when I watch that show. Clearly it's sick. Yeah, but that's because you're a comedian. Dream come true, which is kind of cool. Yeah, it does feel like American Idol. Yeah.

It would be funny if Tony did that. He said, congrats. He's going to be. Oh, he does do that. He goes, you're going to be a star. Yeah. The line. was hilarious because it was like a bunch of fucking, I mean, I was bonding with who I was in line with, but you're looking around the line,

you're looking around the line. I got in that line and I literally told myself, I'm like, I don't want to be here. Why am I here? If I had a gun, I would fucking kill everybody. That was my thought and I left. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, what happened?

The worst groups of people I've ever seen in my entire life. The people I was in line with were, I lucked out. The people I was in line with were cool guys. But yeah, everybody else was insane. My favorite was they cut off the line that nobody else can come through. And this guy in like a Stephen Hawking

chair just cuts. He moves the barricade. And it's really awkward because he's just like looking at us to help him move the barricade. We're like, we help you move the barricade and we will get kicked out. So we can't do anything. We're not going to be mad at you for cutting. So he just awkwardly is like struggling to get through this barricade while looking at us. Did he end up getting in? Yeah, yeah. I mean, he's perfect. Perfect for the show. Oh, yeah. For sure. Yeah, one of my friends whenever there's anybody with any disability, he'll point to whenever there's anybody

any disability is like a kill Tony regular. There's be like a blind guy. Why? Are there a lot of retarded people? Oh, like, fucked up people? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, there was a guy, there's a guy named Jared Nathan on there who has, like, it's called, like, he's got all-out syndrome or full-on syndrome. I don't think they call it that, but it's like, he has every kind of mental, uh, is not the guy that shakes. No, no, no, no, he's a guy, he, like, has down syndrome in the face. That's normal where you have it, but, um, and then the rest of his body, like, he, he stutters and he has all his stuff, but I was thinking for him, I was like, oh, that's this, he's the only guy. Can he, like, walk around? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, uh, but I was like, this is the only guy who's not stressed out right. now because there's no way in his mind this is a stressful comedy. For him he's like dude I'm getting fucking ice cream afterwards. This is like the best day in my life. He was funny. But there's no way he's not going to kill. Nobody's going

to boo a guy with Down syndrome. I mean, I don't know. Pretty vicious audiences, but they're not going to go that far. They booed a guy I know. They're going to Ginsburg? No, but yeah, poor Ginsburg. But no, at Madison Square Ground, Tom Alfano. I don't think I saw him.

Yeah, he was on the second night. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I went to the first night. And, yeah, it's crazy because fucking Andrew Dice Clay comes out and does, like, a set, and it's just hilarious. Like, he did some bit about the Hocchio girl. It was fucking awesome. I thought Aaron Berg was on the show, but it was wasted Joe. Joe Rogan was, like, blackout drunk and, like, fur coat.

Really? Yeah, yeah, he was really? Joe Rogan was there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's sick. Yeah, yeah. a bunch of people did sets like Big J and stuff like that

and yeah it's crazy I was like this is that's cool And then one guy we know Jason King went up And it's obviously all free right Yeah I just got to see that show for free It was great yeah

Well the seat's good Yeah it was funny Tony Hinchcliffe saw where the comic shouldn't He kissed and waved and everybody It's like Caesar Yeah Yeah I don't know I wonder if he even knew that

He might have not even known who is who Oh no no he looked directly into that section and blew a kiss. Yeah, but it's like, you think he knew those with comedians and not just every other retod? Yes, absolutely. Yeah, they have...

Because he has to design it. He has to say they... They have a section. Yeah, they have it where he... Comics only. They run to that section. They say who wants to get... Yeah, obvious.

Yeah, I guess. A big stink emanating from that section of the thing. But that's what I was saying. That's the thing when I walked out there where I was like, there was just like people sell them like vapes and drinks on the street. And it's like, there's always dickheads in that part of town anyways. But I was like, the people...

The shit this is attracting is like, like, this is stuff people say, like, brings the property value down. You know what I mean? It was like, it was a dude walking around. The mayors should not allow kill Tony. I'm like, this is like the worst. I'm like, so fucking most annoying people. I'm like, and obviously it's right across from a giant train station.

So it's like you're going to get like a billion dickheads, you know. Yeah, there's this bald guy with like almost no teeth in a squirpy and tattooed on the side of that. He goes, lunatics. He goes, I've been to every, I go to every single kill Tony. He goes, no matter what city is, I travel. He's like, what they each shit. say HGB Center. I went to the Honda.

Every single Monday, he goes to Kill Tony, no matter where it is in America. It's always in a giant arena like that? No, no, no. But it's mostly in Austin, but he goes every week and off. Yeah, because I went one time like a long, like four years ago,

five years ago, and it was just like a regular place. It was not in like that. I went one of, it was at the Grammarcy. I went there maybe four or five years ago. Yeah. Oh, I think I went to that too, actually.

Yeah. Well, we both didn't get on. Was it the greatest college area? But I went another time. in Texas. You're right. I forgot about that. What's the greatest comedy? You've seen. Me? I saw Brian Regan

when I was a kid. Okay. Yeah, he's great. Okay. Lovely. I'm not saying anything. I'm not saying anything else. Lovely. I'm glad you had a good time. I might say anything bad. Joe Rogan didn't black out at that show,

but it was still somehow good comedy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's cool. That's cool, man. Look, you went to your thing that was good for you and people like you. And I went to a... Disabled.

people. Comedy show where they worked on their act. Yeah, exactly. Didn't just say the stupidest thing in their head. I watched a pro work. Ron White was fun to watch him. He's just like, that's good.

He's like, that'd be great if he just got his age and started that way. He just had a stroke. But he starts my logo. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is that guy still, like, a huge alcoholic?

No, he stopped. He has, like, psychedelics now. Which never... He doesn't drink? No, I probably moved the camera. Damn, he used to always be on that. What was that show he was always on? And he was always on the end with a bottle of booze.

Blue collar comedy tour? Is that what it was? It was, like, four or five dudes sitting up there at the same time? Oh, I don't know. Probably, yeah. Yeah, like rednecks. Dude, he was... Remember, he'd be at the edge, just fucking shit face.

Like, you would, like, make noise. His fucking, uh... He's the... trajectory is crazy. He doesn't drink it. He doesn't even get fucked up. No, I mean, he just has a bunch of acids. So it's not like he's sober. But his, his, his story is my favorite. He's cool. What he was is he was like the biggest, uh, he was like, not the biggest, he was like a headliner like in the Texas circuit. He fucked a fat waitress, made fun of her on stage. She got promoted to manager of that comedy club chain and forced

him out and didn't give him any stage time. He moved to Mexico with selling weed and working at a pottery factory. And then Jeff Foxworthy was really like, if you come back to America, I will let you be part of this blue collar comedy tour. And then he fucking next thing you know, private jets going on stage like and yeah, but he was very funny, but I am. Yeah, that's an interesting

If I ever make it, though, I'm going to make up some crazy stories. He's only one out of the bunch. Yeah. He might be a ran damn. I mean, he had Tater salad. The Jeff Foxworthy show? That was fucking awesome that show. He bought tater salad from somebody. He bought tater salads. I shouldn't actually. I shouldn't

Wait, what do you mean? What's that mean? Oh, there's actually, I shouldn't say the information. He like, he saw someone do that bit and asked if he could buy it from it. No, shit. He apparently paid him like a bunch of money. So it was like, what is this a famous joke? That's like his signature. Who Jeff Foxworthy?

No. Brown white. I thought you were saying they caught the rice to tater salads. Now he owns potato salad. But then you're like, I shouldn't say. You're like, I can't let people know who actually owns potatoes. Yeah. Just something about the story who's buying potatoes salad.

It's dangerous. information for the people to know that he it's just like letting people know there's not an air marshal on every plane you can't let people know he owns the rights to potatoes out. Someone told me that story. I don't know if it's true or not. Maybe they were just better. I believe it. Rogan either sold or bought a bit one time. I forgot

what it was but yeah, I think he bought like some like one like a crowdwork line from somebody but he was like yeah, I paid like $300 and like that's crazy. If anyone ever came up to me and offered me like $100 for a joke of mine, I would immediately sell it to them. Really? It's 100%. Uh, okay. I haven't seen

your acting in a while, but I'm gonna buy a couple. Yeah, because yeah, what's it stop you from not saying it is still, you know what I mean? Well, my thing is the feeling like the worst is, you have somebody to give you a tag and it's better, it gets a bigger laugh than the rest of the joke, and you're like, well, I don't even want to say this now, because it doesn't feel good if you're saying jokes that aren't yours.

I still will use a tag from somebody because like that's whatever, but like they're like, hey, you should try this, but like it doesn't feel as good as the actual ones that I came up with myself. Oh yeah, I've never used to tag anyone ever gave me because people usually give me tags that they give me a tag they're like, oh, I love this bit that you did.

And they gave me a tag and I'm like, I don't think you even knew what I was doing. Yeah. Yeah, that doesn't even make sense. Fuck you. Yeah, that's most of the time, the people that give tags usually are like, not great. Yeah. I don't listen to anyone in any advice. They give me on any subject about anything about my life. And I have $8 billion in my bank account and have more girls than all of you guys.

You should wear pants more often. Are those, dude, are those like, uh, those, have pants that you can attach to them. The zippies. I had, I had just, I walked over here with pants and it's fine to wear pants outside right now, but it's at least 18 to 23 degrees warmer in here than it is outdoors right now. I think that's an exaggeration.

It is beautiful outside right now. It is beautiful outside right now. I don't want to throw stones, but I think you might be exaggerating, and you usually don't. No, it is beautiful outside right now, and you come in here and it's hot. And there's fucking lights on top of, everywhere you go, there's lights.

There's lights on Where you go, this is just one apartment. Everywhere you go, you can't escape the lights. Not the... You can't feel the temperature coming off of these fucking things. This is so my viewers can see us. I'm not... Yeah, I know what they're for.

I know what the lights are for, Michael Good. You already told me we can't turn the air conditioner on because you care about these foot fetish weirdos fucking hair and quality. Hey, they have more hard than you will ever have. Yeah, please. I'll just show your tutsies here while we're going on. I know.

What do you say? So I'll just show your tutsy. Show my feet for these weirdos? You're little feats. just made a guy bus, dude. I couldn't give a fuck, dude.

You've now participated into gay pornography. Couldn't fucking care less, honestly. I got to look anyways. I got a message on Instagram like that. It's like,

hey, I'll buy feet stuff. I won't sell it, though. I would only sell it if I could make it a funny thing. Like, if I could do funny things with my feet,

then I'd be like, okay, whatever else sell us. It's pretty funny to jerk a guy off with your feet. That sounds like something somebody would say

who wants to get chirked off by feet. Yeah, why else would anyone say that? There's no one that's by, They'll tell you you're funny if they can have your feet. No, I know. But I'm saying if I could creatively be like, okay, this involves my feet.

The perverts can jerk off to it. But I also think it's actually a funny thing. Then I would put it out. The guy gets the picture and he's like, I mean, I am hard, but that's funny. Funny is funny. It would be funny if it was the other way. He's like, dude, look, I will jerk off this because I'm a disgusting pervert, but this is really not funny stuff.

You just don't make jokes about that kind of stuff. He's really, yeah. I'm just trying to get off my day, jerk off to some foot porn. I don't need to see you do some school shooting joke with your feet. That's not the kind of wholesome fun I come here for him. But yeah, how does everybody else we've been? Is there something else you're angry about? Wait, what did you just say?

So what do you think about feet, right? Not attracted to them, like, a lot of people. I never, not that I think they're gross or anything, but they don't really, like, do anything for me. You know? Same. You get you around down. Huh? What?

Yeah, no. agree, you're right, your feet get you around, like, but... What is this? They do. That's how you know we've lost momentum. The podcast is going, I'm appreciative.

No, I was saying, he asked me. Your feet get you around town, I guess. He asked me, like, I don't, like, I've never seen a girl that's had either, like, hot or, like, gross feet. It doesn't, I don't know. I've seen a gross foot. Sure, like, if you have infections on it. Yeah, sure, but like...

My feet are disgusting, dude. I got, like, they get yellow towards the tips sometimes. I take, like, 30,000 steps a day, dude. You know, my shit's beat the fuck up. why are you so active? What do you do all there? Walk around. What do you do for us? Tour guide. Right now, tour guide. Oh, how's that? Sick, dude. Do you do it in the kill?

In the kill? With Nickill. Nekil does it. Oh, no, no, no. He kills a tour guide? Yeah, he does it at 30 Rock. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No. No, I just wander around and at and show people... He has a what? He's like a page. He's like an NBC. I don't know if he is. Maybe I guess he is. What's page? A page is like they essentially do like tour. around.

Yeah, he does. He does tour. Yeah, but that's supposed to be like an intro into licking Jimmy Fallon's balls or something, right? Doesn't normally lead you in a good way?

I go on tour guides at fucking, I go through Rockefeller Center and show these people a good time. Yeah, maybe he is not actually only at Dirty Rock. I think maybe he just does around the whole city.

But where do you want? No, no, he can't leave. He doesn't have his license. Nick Hill doesn't have his fucking license, okay? Neither do none of those NBC people. They don't leave the property there so they don't.

I'm a sightseeing license. Hold on. Can I see it? Yeah, of course you can. I have my site seeing license holder. I pass the fucking test. Not those fucking... I'll fucking raise hell at NBC.

I don't give a shit. All right? I'll go in there. I'll go in the store and steal. I don't care. He was trying to get... That NBC gift store next to radio... I'll go in there.

I'll take a t-shirt. I need to, like, register a bathroom or something for your tour, and he wanted my old apartment's bathroom. Wait, to just let random people come in? Yeah. Who did Nick Hill? You. All right.

You? I did not. Yes, you did do that. You bothered being Eli about that for fucking months. Shut the fuck up, dude. What were you doing? What was he doing? No, that's from the answer.

Apparently, you need to shut up. You're not telling the truth. You need to register like a bathroom on your tour route. No, you don't. You don't need a register a bathroom. This is you saying this shit. Look it up. Look at up.

You don't have to register a bathroom to go on a, to show people around the city. You need to register a bathroom. Are you out of your mind? Is he, is he, is he, is he, does your balls about something? No, he's saying you need a register a tour around a bathroom. You don't need to register a bathroom on a tour. You're grinning right now. Fuck you, dude. Because I know what you guys are doing. I already told

you. You're making shit up to fuck with me. No, we're not. By the way, we start this. I say, you got a lot of momentum in here. Ryan goes, why are you fucking with me? I'm like, I'm not fuck with you. I think a positive thing. I was like, he's like, why are you always trying to piss me off? I'm like, I'm just saying you came with a lot of energy and I liked it. No, you were bothered me because you say we can't turn the air conditioner on. Do you want to mention it 585 more times? If it's going to be, put it this way. If there's a chance that 586 it gets turned on, then yes.

Ryan O'Toole, looking at it right now. Smallest penis in America. There you go. Yeah. Does anyone ever ask you to pull that card out? Like, the cops stop you? No, they know I'm a genius. They do.

No one knows to stop me. I had everybody the other day, I had all these fucking... Also, there's people doing heroin in the streets. No, the cops care of you doing an unlicensed tour of New Z. No, no. That's factually inaccurate. They will. No, they will.

They will right now. I mean, that department's been like a little defunded, so to say. But yeah, they will. They'll get on you if like you're fucking what other businesses and stuff in New York. They'll get on you. Really? Yeah, absolutely. If you're fucking.

Tim Dillon would do it and just lie and just say false information all the time. Is that what they care about? No, you can't. Yeah, you could tell people whatever you want to say. You could tell people whatever you want to say. Can I have an anti-vax city room tour where I just the whole time I go, it's fucking. It's called the First Amendment. It's called the First Amendment.

It's hilarious. Michael Goods. anti-vaccine pro-Kyle written house tour of New York City you sent me a text saying I need your phone number so I can list it

as the bathroom on my tour Let me see that I didn't see that How long did it take a design of that shit? Wait, I mean I didn't get to see it He takes your phone You went to hit canceling

Can I tell two right-o tools right now I'm gonna tell two of these Your phone everything's doc You used to live it in a fucking dark moldy room with no light. I couldn't read the screen. Ryan fucking, one time I was showing her this hot woman who ran an open

and he fucking liked this girl's picture at like 2 a.m. on my fucking phone. Another thing you did is you borrowed my phone one time and then you're like, that's not Whitney Cummings because I was showing you a picture of Dev, whatever, there's something where there's picture Whitney Cummings. Next thing you know, I check my Instagram story. It's just a model with huge tits on there.

It says like Babes Instagram or something. from like that. To be fair, now months later, I'm just posting the fat chicks on my story. Wait, what does that have to do with me? You took my phone and posted it. When? We're not doing this. This is that fucking Matt Bowman's birthday party.

I did not take you. I would not touch your phone. I think your phone's, you know, yeah, you just told me you posted something on your Instagram about some giant stripper ripping her clothes off and eating food. Hey, hey, hey, that's Jojo Peach. Yeah.

Okay. I didn't touch anyone's fucking phone. That's what he does. You take your friend. He's a master. He'll do it in like 0.3 seconds. I did it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Dude. You guys are all fucking full of shit. It is the best. It's a good break. You're all full of shit. You're all full of shit.

You're all full. You saying you need a fucking register a bathroom for a tour? I just found the text on my phone. I have a license. You just saw my site to be license. Don't tell me what like municipal requirements are required to obtain something like that. This is information. I got from you.

Wait, so was the whole point is that he would have people come shit in your house or you just need a technical one? Ask him. There you go, throw it on me! He's the license. How do you go?

Throw it on me. Could you imagine doing a fucking tour guide and then the tour guy brings you into his apartment to take his shit for a couple minutes? You're just right outside.

He's like, not even his apartment. Don't mind the guy. We're going to go to my buddy's apartment where they're playing red dead. I brought people to the pier just to like sit down and chill out and shit. You know what I mean?

Oh yeah, I've seen tours coming. During the day, yeah, during the day, I'm like, all right, well, I'll go in the back. I've had, like, people in the pier, like, 11 fucking people that don't speak English going into the pier to use the bathroom and shit during the day. That's so funny. I don't give a fuck.

I've seen it where, like, people come by and, like, you're at an open mic, and, like, the whole group of tourists will just come in and you think they're going to watch, and then they're just there to use. Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah. You got to do that because it's like, like New York sucks for for like

pissing. Tell you what though, you're listening to this podcast right now. You go to the Barnes & Noble fucking Union Square bathroom. That is the best bathroom in all Is it? Dude's incredible. Yeah. Because for the lizards that aren't in New York so like you can't use, like you go to 7-11 and Florida, I don't know, it's like Boston. Florida, you go to 7-Eleven, you can use the bathroom. Florida, you go to 7-Eleven, you can't use the bathroom. Florida, you go to 7-Eleven, you can use the bathroom. No, it's not a set down like pizza places won't let you use the restroom. Most places won't let's use the restroom. Barnes & Noble Times Square

has a fucking... I thought you just said Union Square. Union Square. They have a fucking security guard. It's making sure homeless people don't go in there, but if you look like, they really have like a security. It's fucking great. There's just a guy in like a fucking black suit. Well, that is a nice one because it's like the one where there's upstairs and stuff like that. That's a nice store. Yeah, there's a giant Lego Batman and Lego Harry Potter statue.

That's the problem. That's why that's the thing that's like people like, they, that's where the homeless people get a free pass is they, homeless people in drug addicts. They fuck up going the bathroom for everybody else. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, I tried to go to the bathroom in the thing, and some guys started yelling at me, calling me a faggot.

And I was like, this is really hard. What, in Bonds and Nobles? No, in the fucking Union Square bathroom. Oh, yeah, bro. This guy just, like, I'm, like, going to take a shit and this guy just starts, like, yelling. That shit's insane over there. Yeah.

You're asking to get robbed going in that bathroom. Yeah, I won't go in that bathroom. I'd rather piss. I'd rather piss out, like in the park. Yeah. I was like, this guy's going to say mean, hurtful things to me. I'm not, I'm not poop in here.

People get fucking, bro, it's gross in there. I would never touch anything in there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, the guy had, like, all of his stuff, and he was just... There's, like, the lights never on. He's just hanging out in the bathroom, bothering everybody like that. It was just so funny because he was, like, he has all of his things in there. He's just standing there, just yelling at anybody that walks in the pad, which is very fun, but for him.

Fucking assholes. But yet if you, but yet, they're, like, they're, like, kind of strict over there because I've got yelled out about Union Square, like, pissing. Like, because I'll piss. A lot of times, I'm like, I was in there was a dude. There was needles everywhere. I'm not pissing in here. I don't want to do anything.

So I pissed like on the other... You know, there's like a pizza place there, like another like restaurant on the top? I went like behind that and pissed there. And the fucking cop stopped. There's a playground right there. No, no. No, there is.

But you couldn't be seen... Not like behind that, behind the bathroom that's next to that. Okay. I was in the view of literally anybody. Okay. Other than like if you walked out of the back there and like took the trash out from that restaurant.

Probably fucking gateville. What are you doing back there? I go, taking a piss. They go, why wouldn't you go in the bathroom? I go because someone's on meth right now, harassing everybody. I go, why don't you go in the bathroom and ask me if you want to piss in there. But it's like you get in truck, they'll bitch at you for that. You gotta piss outside.

You gotta piss outside. Dude, I had a great fucking time. This was fun. This was a fun one. Thanks for it's playing me hop on. Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah. Anything you guys want to promote?

Ryan O'T, it's Ryan O'Toole on Instagram. It'll be in the fucking, um, description. Yeah, he'll put it down now. Levi the White on Instagram. Also, when is this, when is this, when is this? this being posted? This Sunday. All right. Go on my Instagram. Click on my Instagram story right now.

I need to mention something to somebody. Listen, if you go on my Instagram, it's Ryan O'Toole, I put on my story, go to the next slide. Back, back, back, back. Read that at name on the bottom. Okay, stolen cat. No, read the at name. At NYC free.

No, click on the link. Click on the link. You're going to talk to again today. Some asshole stole a cat and queens. It's on my Instagram story. Look at it. Because it's a fucked up story. You should put that page on the bio. Why do you care more about this than Gaza? Go down.

I didn't say anything about Gaza. Go, keep going, scrolling forward. Go to what I posted today. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Put this in the...

Whatever. I'll tell you. Bring home Antonio or some shit. Put it in the... I'm going to text you and you need to put it in the description. I don't care about this script. I'm going to edit it. No, you put it in a description.

I'm never doing this podcast. I'm never doing this podcast ever again. Go ahead. I'm never doing this podcast. You're putting that in there. All right. What's your Instagram? You already say your Instagram?

You guys both say your Instagram? It's Ryan O'Toole. Levi the White. Thank you guys.